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    50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids: Simple Wisdom and Truths for Parents
    50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids: Simple Wisdom and Truths for Parents
    50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids: Simple Wisdom and Truths for Parents
    Ebook122 pages1 hour

    50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids: Simple Wisdom and Truths for Parents

    By Tim Kimmel

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    About this ebook

    Yes! You can love your kids in amazing ways you may have never even thought of! And one of America's top advocates for the family will help you do it.

    In 50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids, Tim Kimmel offers moms and dads simple, how-to ways to express love to their children. His thought-provoking ideas include: "Have a love that works overtime to simplify your children's lives," "Model a love that always wants to give more than is asked of it," "Show your kids how to love life and live it in an adventurous way," "Love your kids so much that you'll not allow excuses to cover their moral infractions," "Start loving your kids' future spouses now," and "Don't force God to discipline your kids…you do it."

    Each of the 50 ways fits neatly onto an attractive, two-page reading to challenge and inspire parents, ages 25-55.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherThomas Nelson
    Release dateApr 16, 2006
    ISBN9781418552213
    50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids: Simple Wisdom and Truths for Parents
    Author

    Tim Kimmel

    Dr. Tim Kimmel is one of America’s top advocates speaking for the family. He is the Executive Director of the non-profit ministry Family Matters, whose goal is to build great family relationships by educating, equipping and encouraging parents for every age and stage of life. Tim conducts conferences across the country on the unique pressures that confront today’s families. He has authored many books including: Little House on the Freeway (selling over 700,000 copies; Multnomah) and the Gold Medallion winning bestseller Grace Based Parenting (100,000 copies; Thomas Nelson). He lives with his family in Scottsdale, Arizona.

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      Book preview

      50 Ways to Really Love Your Kids - Tim Kimmel

      1

      Love that is Secure

      When did you first fall in love with your child? For some moms, it was about ten seconds after they saw the two lines on their home pregnancy test. For sure, the earliest movement from the miracle growing inside of them drew an echo of I love you from somewhere in the corners of their hearts. Dads sometimes take a bit longer to make the connection. But for certain, when we look into the eyes of that little life placed in our arms, the deal is sealed. We are in love.

      It’s safe to say that almost all parents love their children. But loving your child—and even doing things to show your love—does not necessarily translate into a secure love.

      Secure love? What’s that?

      I’m talking about that steady, sure, and unwavering love that we must not fail to write on the hard drives of our children’s souls. It’s a complete love that they can default to when their hearts are under attack. It’s the kind of love that children can confidently carry with them into the future.

      Secure love is the stuff that helps them continue moving forward when they just got sucker punched by circumstances. Like when they’ve given their hearts to someone who has just told them they don’t love them anymore, or the bottom falls out of their financial world, or they get fired, or framed, or betrayed. It’s the love that keeps them confident when they’re wearing a uniform, standing a lonely post, and facing a merciless enemy far from the safety of home.

      Adapted from Grace-Based Parenting and Little House on the Freeway

      I’ve got great news! You can set the foundation for this secure love. All you need to do is go to the source of a love that knows no boundaries and has no limits. A God who would cross the threshold of time, walk down a back street of civilization, and climb up on a cross that was meant for us knows how to help us love like that. And the better news is that He offers that love to anyone who asks for it.

      2

      Love Without Conditions

      Here’s a problem: standard off–the–rack love comes with too many strings attached. Few things block our ability to connect to the hearts of our children more than a love that says, "I’ll love you if, or . . . because, or . . . when, or . . . after certain arbitrary conditions have been met." That kind of love makes it hard for kids to keep a smile on their face, a gleam in their eye, or a bounce in their step.

      Our children need an I love you . . . period kind of love, and they need it most from the people they care about most—Mom and Dad. They need to know that improvement on their part isn’t going to get us to love them more, and that we won’t love them any less if they have a bad day, or even a series of them.

      This is where a well–defined love comes to the rescue. When we start with an unencumbered understanding of what unconditional love looks like, it’s easier—a lot easier— to make it part of the DNA of our role as parents.

      I’ve got a definition of love that you can take to the bank! This stuff works! Love is: the commitment of my will to your needs and best interests, regardless of the cost. Run it through the wringer. Take it through its paces. This kind of love passes the litmus test of unconditional love.

      But it doesn’t come cheap. You may have to muster courage, say no to your fears, and place your feelings in check. That’s because unconditional love isn’t about you; it’s about them.

      Unconditional love understands that loving your children is often inconvenient and painful. It will cost you money, time, and years of sleep. It might cost Mom decades off her career and too many years off her figure. It might cost Dad a promotion. You will have to do without some amenities or lavish vacations. It definitely means eating crow, swallowing your pride, and asking for forgiveness . . . a lot. But in your wallet are pictures of some kids who God says are definitely worth it.

      Adapted from Grace-Based Parenting

      3

      Love that Provides

            a Place to Repent

      The nature of a child’s spirit begs a tender touch, whether it’s emotions lost in confusion and badgered by fears, or a broken heart that longs to recover in the deep, quilted comfort of gentle understanding. Children lose their way. Sometimes they make huge mistakes in the process. They need a place to repent.

      As adults, we know that those who follow the well–worn path to the base of the cross find ample room for heavy hearts and hurts that can’t seem to heal. It’s an amazing grace that doesn’t trivialize the fickle nature of our personalities. There’s no condescension waiting to counter our tendencies to become easily embarrassed. There are no lectures to straighten out the folly of our thinking. There’s no mocking of our self–conscious thoughts—just a generous Savior with a gentle heart who knows how unsure we often are about ourselves.

      God doesn’t card those who come searching for His grace. You won’t find any age restrictions for those wanting to travel down His path. Jesus said, Let the little children come to me (Matthew 19:4 NKJV). But some paths are easier to take when they are walked hand in hand with someone older and wiser.

      Jesus makes people feel comfortable even when He catches them without their makeup. When circumstances scrub off the layers of their self–confidence and their shortcomings wash away the foundation of their self–righteousness, Jesus isn’t appalled by the blemishes He finds underneath. There’s no sin too bad, no doubt too big, no question too hard, and no heart too broken that His grace can’t deal with it.

      Adapted from Grace-Based Parenting

      These are the very

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