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    Mindfulness at Work: Flourishing in the workplace
    Mindfulness at Work: Flourishing in the workplace
    Mindfulness at Work: Flourishing in the workplace
    Ebook146 pages2 hours

    Mindfulness at Work: Flourishing in the workplace

    By Maria Arpa

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    About this ebook

    The realities of the modern-day workplace can include stress, pressure and apathy, but with a thoughtful approach and an openness to change, anyone can transform their work experience. In ‘Mindfulness at Work’, expert mediator and counsellor Maria Arpa shares her professional and personal insights into ways we can all create positive change at work - ways to cut conflict, find contentment and develop an environment where harmony and clarity rule.

    Learn how to use her meditation practices and meditation tools to enrich your daily life and thrive and flourish, whatever your working circumstances.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherIvy Press
    Release dateMar 1, 2013
    ISBN9781782400332
    Mindfulness at Work: Flourishing in the workplace
    Author

    Maria Arpa

    Maria Arpa is a London-based mediator and counsellor who works with couples to help heal and mend troubled relationships. She is the founder of the Centre for Peaceful Solutions, and is a former chair of Mediation UK. Maria has a master's degree in mediation and conflict resolution, a diploma in counselling theory and practice, and is a Reiki Master. She has also trained with the pioneer of Nonviolent Communication (NVC), Dr Marshall Rosenberg.

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    • 3/5
      This is a useful book, though at times I found it straddled the border between brain science and woo-woo... However it gives you the tools (if you choose to use them, I've just read it straight through and will go back to pick out the exercises I feel will be of most use to me) to help you become more self aware in the workplace and thus manage your own responses to the inevitable tensions, and, indeed, assess whether you are in the right place for your own fulfilment.

    Book preview

    Mindfulness at Work - Maria Arpa

    INTRODUCTION

    Most of us believe we have no choice but to work and many people have little choice about what work they do. Education, wealth and environment can dictate the options available – yet we have all heard of people who are ‘self-made’, who rejected the limitations and broke through the barriers. But finding fulfilment at work doesn’t always require a drastic change; sometimes addressing conflicts and relationships in the workplace can make all the difference. This book is filled with exercises, meditations and a personal two-week plan so you can learn to be mindful about work.

    WORKING WITHOUT FULFILMENT

    In an ideal world, your work would be a source of fulfilment, providing you with meaning and purpose. Too often, though, this isn’t the case. When the world around you isn’t performing how you would like, your choices are either a change of attitude or a change of direction. Mindfulness will help you choose.

    MY SON , S AM, IS HOME FROM UNIVERSITY and hoping to find work for the summer. It’s tough. Unemployment is high right now. In his words, ‘I’m determined to find a job or I’ll end up spending the whole summer on the PlayStation.’ His first priority is to earn some cash; but that’s not all of it. He wants to do something meaningful, which is not always possible because it depends on what work is available. This creates a dilemma for many young people at the start of their working lives – whether to take any job to earn money, even if the work is joyless or meaningless, or to hold out for meaning and purpose, even if it means being broke. This choice, which most of us have faced, can set a blueprint for how our working life will turn out. Many take whatever work they can get and while they are grateful for having employment, the workplace is a source of a great deal of unhappiness.

    While pondering this, I came across the latest Happiness at Work Index findings that stated that one out of four people in the UK is unhappy at work. Even if this is an exaggeration, something must be wrong with our workplaces if even 10 per cent of the workforce is unhappy. For that much unhappiness to exist, we must be telling ourselves that we are powerless to change things. I know I thought that once upon a time. Many reasons were given for dissatisfaction – including poor management, low pay and lack of opportunity – but 48 per cent of respondents said their job held no significant meaning for them. Clearly there is a problem that needs confronting.

    So What Can Be Done?

    If you are one of the many people who are dissatisfied with their lot at work and feel powerless to change it, this book is for you. If you can understand what it is that drives your unhappiness at work, you can address it and plan for change. If you see yourself as powerless, then you are powerless – but that doesn’t mean you have to remain powerless. Spending many hours a day with a group of people you didn’t choose to share this much of your life with, in a job you are not satisfied with, will create a pressure cooker of tension. Left unresolved, it will fester under the surface, creating stress and taking its toll on your emotional and physical well-being.

    However, by using the mindfulness techniques explained in the book, you can reduce stress, develop contentment, influence your working environment and make better choices. My aim is to share what I have learned through my passionate desire to turn work into productive play.

    WHAT IS MINDFULNESS?

    For the purposes of this book, I define mindfulness as a conscious awareness of the present moment and recognition of what is really happening. This requires us to observe rather than judge events – which is easier said than done, because we are usually unaware of the lens through which we are examining the world.

    THAT LENS OFTEN DISTORTS REALITY in order to substantiate the beliefs we hold. Mindfulness is a ‘waking up’ process. It asks us to live consciously, to have regard for our sensations, feelings, thoughts and actions. A significant part of mindfulness is meditation. This allows you to become aware of yourself in the present. We learn meditation by focusing on our breathing; try spending thirty seconds right now focusing on your breathing and just slow it down a little. Mindfulness brings empowerment and self-responsibility and this leads to better self-care, decision making and participation in life. At work, it requires us to constantly review our individual and collective contribution and the results of those contributions.

    Looking Back

    Because congruity between what I say and what I do matters to me, I found myself looking back on choices I have made. I have thrived in some settings and walked out of others. In all cases I have reflected upon and learned from the experiences.

    One of my more miserable recollections was a boss who, on a daily basis and without any provocation, would shout angrily across the office to the whole staff: ‘Remember, if you don’t like it here, there are plenty of people waiting in the wings to take your place.’ He believed that the fear of losing one’s job was motivational.

    What is extraordinary is that he had a dream team in place who would work all night to meet a deadline. Individually, they could each find work anywhere and probably for more money, but I had deliberately recruited a team who liked each other and could work cooperatively. This made work enjoyable for them and everyone agreed that having fun at work was more important than earning more money. What I didn’t anticipate was an owner who failed to recognise that his team would be prepared to make more money for him in return for a fun atmosphere; instead he found their camaraderie a threat.

    The work was of a very high standard, all the clients were happy and profits were good. But the owner’s capacity to trust was so limited, he used to count the stamps to see if any had been stolen. He was completely unable to enjoy the good times. Sometimes people can’t. Over time, the atmosphere deteriorated. After all the work I had put in to create a motivated team, I just felt powerless, frustrated and resentful.

    One day I walked out. I decided to change it all and start my own business, vowing to enjoy work above all else. So at the age of twenty-eight I began a challenging journey.

    Life in the Fast Lane

    The business I set up was an advertising agency. It made money and employed people and we definitely appreciated the good times. I defined myself through my work. I saw myself as a ‘businesswoman’, and as I started to hang out with other successful businesswomen, we saw ourselves as women ‘breaking through the glass ceiling’. I became more and more formidable, in line with the role I was attributing to myself. I was also bringing up my two children and coping with a floundering marriage, but I was a businesswoman first. I enjoyed being a mother but somehow I couldn’t allow myself the time to truly enjoy being a parent.

    Then something snapped. I found myself calling the nanny to arrange a breakfast meeting with the children, then aged four and five, and I realized something was drastically wrong. That moment of realization may have been my first experience of mindfulness, though I wouldn’t have recognized it at the time. It was a moment of awareness where I was able to observe my life from a distance and question it without judgement or blame. I asked myself, ‘Is this really what I want for myself?’ The question was too big, because on some level I knew that answering it would change everything. I was scared. I remember saying at the time, ‘Every time I contemplate answering that question, it feels like I’m about to jump out of a plane with no parachute.’ I was the wrong side of thirty-five and hovered on that question for a couple of years.

    The Moment of Truth

    One day I confronted the question: ‘What do I really want for myself?’ The answer was clear: I wanted to feel more joy in my work. It was also clear that although I was meeting my needs for success and fulfilment, I wasn’t feeling much joy – because the truth was that being a ‘formidable businesswoman’ with a reputation was no fun. My ego loved it but my soul was screaming out for me to stop. I realized that change was upon me. Life in its present form was no longer tolerable.

    It was a struggle to give up a materially wealthy lifestyle to try something new. In those moments of mindfulness, I reminded myself that I was paying too high a price for what the world judged as success but I was increasingly experiencing as a

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