The Jerk Tamer
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About this ebook
The world would run perfectly if it wasn’t for one key factor. This one thing causes production to slow down to a mere crawl, companies go out of business, careers to be sidetracked, and dreams to be crushed. What is this one this seemly notorious and vilified factor?
It’s PEOPLE. Working with difficult people can be one of the most frustrating things in the entire universe and if you can’t recognize the different personality types and learn the skills to deal with each you too will also fail. Many rising stars with great potential and bright futures have let conflict with people they work with knock them off course and their bright futures completely burned out. They made a few mistakes and were tagged with “doesn’t work well with others” or the black ball label of “not a people person”.
I’m here to help. I can help you identify and conquer the quicksand of dealing with toxic people and their behaviors. This book will lay out the specific skills needed to win with people and if followed will place a feather in you cap. You will be looked at as the jerk-whisperer. Consider this an instructional handbook that you can pull out on any given day to deal with anyone who is causing problems.
Consider this book a handbook. A handbook that will give you real answers and teaches you the skills you need to overcome any problem that people throw at you. I offer no fluff or theories that haven’t been put into practice. I offer straight talk on how to put jerks in their place when they cross the line.
Cranston Holden
I encourage you to not let the outside world affect your inside world, but rather force your inside world to affect your outside world. This little twist on semantics WILL change your life for the better.
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The Jerk Tamer - Cranston Holden
This section lays out the different personality types that you will experience the most trouble with and how to handle each one. Let’s face it, anyone can work with the perfect employee who is always on time, does a great job, and has a great attitude. Anyone can thrive with people like this but what happens when you have your best friend’s little sister who does a decent job but it a major workplace brat? This section lays out how to recognize the major personality types and how to deal with each one skillfully and tactfully that doesn’t alienate anyone.
Well if those types of people worked for me I’d just fire them,
someone may be saying to themselves as they read this. That’s true. You can just fire people you don’t like dealing with but you better be prepared to do the all work YOURSELF. When the organization gets big enough, you had better not be on the front lines doing all the work yourself or you will soon be out of business. If you can’t afford to fire them, you better learn to fix them.
How to Manage Long Time Employees with Attitudes
They say that you can’t teach old dogs new tricks. Well, sometimes there’s truth to that. Notice I said sometimes. Any new leader has probably learned this lesson the hard way. The new leader comes in with high hopes and new ideas only to be crushed by old timers who are set in their ways and have no intention to change.
Normally it takes the average person about 72 hours to get our minds around a new idea. If you present a new idea and then demand an immediate response to accept your own views people will almost always resist or say no. For long time employees, it can be twice that. So be patient. You can and will hear things like, That’s not how we do things around here
or We’ve never done it that way.
Just stay calm and patient and tell them, Today’s a new day.
More importantly tell yourself the same thing.
Here are the disadvantages of long term employees:
•The law of diminishing return may have set in. They are getting paid more and more for less and less.
•Can be hardheaded and stubborn. Most are set in their ways. Like an old CD, they have a behavioral pattern burned into the disc. Each time they pop the CD in they hear the same track. Your job is to rewrite over that old pattern.
•Will openly resist your instruction and plan. They may even attempt to openly debate you if they feel they can get other people on their side or to their cause. Don’t allow them to fight you. They must be coachable! Tell them the old days are over and the only thing that will be consistent is the change for the betterment of the organization. Ask them to commit to the positive change and hold them accountable to it. Focus may not be enough here.
•Can negatively influence newer employees and are quick to become a bully.
Here are the advantages:
•Training will be shorter
•Once they are on board, you won’t have to hold their hand. You can manage by objectives rather than tasks.
•Can positively influence all employees and are quick to become a leader on your side that you need to be successful.
•They can be your biggest asset and your best support system, but they have to WANT to follow you. Give them a reason.
How to Deal With Vindictive People
A vindictive person is someone who seeks vengeance on someone for a perceived wrong they’ve had to suffer at the hands of someone else. They lie patiently like a viper, in wait of the opportune moment to get even and make someone suffer, just like they have suffered whether it’s justified or not. They can’t wait to settle the score. They physically enjoy seeing other people suffer because to them, this is justice.
When something doesn’t go their way or they experience any level of pain they go into vengeance mode. Someone must pay. These people are so hard to spot because they are often friendly to your face, smiling, looking you in the eye, and attempting to make small talk with you. A gut feeling tells you something is off, but then your guilt of judging someone so nice shames the feeling away.
Beware! Listen to that gut feeling. It may be right on the money. As soon as your guard goes down they will strike like a sharpened dagger between your shoulder blades. Their behavior can be refusal to participate, turning their back when you are in need, and hurtful comments. Often their go to move of the skilled vengeance seeker is to be a tattle tale or gossiper. If you are in the work place this can be to your superior and at home this can be directed toward your spouse or best friend.
Their M.O.
is to bring it up during a normal conversation by just letting a small amount of the deadly information slip out by mistake. They do this so the other person becomes curious enough to ask more questions. Bringing the dagger out in an innocent way is how they often get away with it. I probably shouldn’t say anything,
but they