Born Again at Granny's Cave
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About this ebook
Mysterious. Troubled. Loads of fun at parties.
Kara's lived a long and dangerous life, and may be forced to live it all over again.
Regan Wolfrom
Regan Wolfrom (born at the tail end of the disco era) has come a long way from his 1986 debut novel Harry the Adventurous Hamster (currently out of print due to having never been published or completed). After a break from writing to attend puberty, and to eventually sell six packs of Molson Canadian to his misnamed crush, Moosehead Girl, Regan returned to the craft with reckless abandon and a gallon jug of iced tea with just a smattering of extremely cheap rum. Regan is now the author of numerous short stories and an upcoming post-apocalyptic novel series with only one mention (so far) of zombie erections. Regan hopes to one day write a novel set on Mars while sitting in his boxer shorts on the actual Red Planet, and everything that comes before that is really just his way of saving up for the one-way trip. Though Regan has been shafted by residency requirements in his pursuit of the MacArthur genius grant, his current fiction is considered to be of high caliber, reflecting a marked improvement in style and grammar from the aforementioned thing with the hamster. It also has far fewer graphic scenes of pound puppy plushes having sex in the back of a shoebox with paper wheels. What does Regan have to say about Regan? "I recently passed up the chance to hassle Samuel L. Jackson." "I've always wanted to change my name to something boring, like Hugh Howey." "I know how to cook six things. None of them are oatmeal." "I write stories that are weird, a little dark, and definitely inappropriate for my children. It could be tough to keep that going when they get to be as old and weird as I am today." "Oh... and my dog is in love with me... like... in a disturbing way." Please read one of Regan's stories for a more in-depth tour of Regan's unresolved childhood issues.
Read more from Regan Wolfrom
Catholic Guilt and the Joy of Hating Men Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Ocean Goddess and The Home Run Queen Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
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Born Again at Granny's Cave - Regan Wolfrom
Born Again at Granny's Cave
a short story from Catholic Guilt and the Joy of Hating Men
by Regan Wolfrom
Copyright © Regan Wolfrom 2012
Book Cover Design by Christine Ko
Stock from Conrado/Bigstock.com
E-Book Distribution by XinXii - www.xinxii.com
IT STARTED in her chest, right near her heart. The flames spread quickly. Within seconds her entire body from her hair to her toes was burning up in front of me.
I hadn’t known what was happening at the time. There’d been no lighter fluid or gasoline, no exploding boilers or burning SUVs... Kara had just been lying there in my arms. The shaking had stopped and her eyes had turned glassy, and I’d just realized that I’d lost her.
And then she caught on fire.
I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure that Granny’s Cave is a shithole by design; god-awful music, dark wood panels on the wall that make you feel like your trapped inside a giant tree... I think they do it all on purpose, some way of getting you to drink a little more of their eight dollar draughts.
If it hadn’t been for Callum and his baseless optimism I would’ve been halfway home to East Van and the comfort of my neatly-categorized porn folders. But I decided to stay, even though there weren’t that many women around. The place was mostly packed full of guys with edgy piercings and poorly-placed tattoos, wearing those skinny guy t-shirts I’ve never had a legitimate reason to wear.
Nice talent, eh, Lanny?
Callum said as we circled, checking out every woman in the room.
What I’d seen so far was nothing I wanted. All I saw were girls so nasty they looked like they lived and worked in