Witches (Un)Welcome
By Kaye Umansky and Ashley King
5/5
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About this ebook
'Umansky is one of our most delightful comic writers. Read aloud and chortle together...' The Sunday Times
'A Bewitching tale, charmingly told and is certain to delight any witch in the making' M.G, Leonard, award-winning author of Beetle Boy
'A gorgeous story that bubbles with charm, wit and magic' Abi Elphinstone, author of Sky Song
'Bursting with memorable characters, a huge sense of fun and a big dollop of honey, flowers and strawberry-scented magic!' Joe Berger, author of Lyttle Lies and Hubble Bubble
'A sulky raven, a grubby dog and a common-sense heroine with a strong sense of customer service. This is a funny, magical treat!' Holly Webb, author of Lost in the Snow
It's summertime in Smallbridge, but, as always, nothing exciting is happening. Smallbridge doesn't do excitement. They do gossip, though. And now Elsie Pickles is the subject of the gossip as rumours spring up about her new magic skills …
Things aren’t helped when Magenta Sharp, bored of running her mail-order service, Spells on Tap, opens up a pop-up magic shop next to Pickles’ Emporium. Soon the town is overrun with witches, much to the annoyance of the magic-hating people of Smallbridge! But maybe a little bit of magic is just the thing Smallbridge needs?
Kaye Umansky
Kaye Umansky was born in Plymouth in Devon, England. She went to Teacher's Training College, after which she taught in London primary schools for twelve years, specializing in music and drama. In her spare time, she sang and played keyboards with a semiprofessional soul band. She now writes full time and has written more than twenty-five books of fantasy, fiction, and poetry for children. She draws on traditional folktales and modern urban myths for her inspiration and has a sense of humor that is popular with children of all ages, from five to one hundred and five. She lives in London with her family. Among her most popular books are her hilarious Pongwiffy titles. Pongwiffy, Pongwiffy and the Goblins' Revenge, and Pongwiffy and the Spell of the Year, which won the Nottinghamshire Book Award, are available from Minstrel Books.
Read more from Kaye Umansky
Pongwiffy Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Witch in Winter Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Wish for a Witch Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Pongwiffy Stories 1: A Witch of Dirty Habits and The Goblins' Revenge Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEven More Pongwiffy Stories: The Pantomime and The Spellovision Song Contest and Back on Track Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMore Pongwiffy Stories: The Spell of the Year and The Holiday of Doom Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
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Book preview
Witches (Un)Welcome - Kaye Umansky
SOME THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW BEFORE WE GET STARTED. . .
There are three important things you need to know about Elsie Pickles:
1. Elsie lives in Smallbridge – a boring country town with a small bridge. Smallbridge is not a magical sort of place. When magic occurs, people don’t approve. They like an uneventful life. No surprises. No upsets. There are unspoken rules about noise, meal times, clothes, respectable occupations and the proper times to get up and go to bed. Hair is only let down on approved bank holidays. Even then, the fireworks are over by ten. No need to go mad.
2. Elsie helps her dad, Albert, in the family shop, called Pickles’ Emporium. Despite the grand name, the Emporium is a small shop down a side alley, full of cheap, boring things. People go there to chat and not spend much. You don’t get rushed, like in other shops. That’s because Albert is very hot on customer service. Elsie knows all his rules by heart. She doesn’t mind her job. There are worse things than working with your dad. But not long ago she started wishing things could liven up a bit, like in books. Just something different. And then Magenta Sharp blew into town and definitely made things different. Because now. . .
3. Elsie is learning to be a witch. She didn’t expect that last one. It just kind of happened after Magenta’s visit.
Known locally (and rather sniffily) as ‘that Red Witch Woman’, people disapprove of Magenta Sharp for the following reasons:
1. She’s a witch.
2. She wears red. If you must be a witch, at least look like one.
3. She wasn’t born and bred in Smallbridge. Acts snooty.
4. She brings bad weather with her. On purpose.
5. She lives in Crookfinger Forest, which is lawless, sprawling and untidy.
6. She resides in a mysterious tower that is rumoured to move about! Moving towers are against Smallbridge planning laws.
But Elsie finds Magenta fascinating. After their first meeting, Elsie agreed to look after the tower while the witch was away. Nuisance, the town’s stray dog went with her to make sure she was OK (and also because he thought Elsie might have sausages to give him – sausages are his favourite) and now his heart belongs to Elsie. He does his own doggy thing during the day, but at night he sleeps in the doorway of the Emporium. (He won’t come in, though. He’s an outside dog.)
Other important things that you need to know are:
MAGIC
Elsie didn’t mean to mess about with magic. But now she’s started, she doesn’t want to stop. Of course, magic is unpredictable and things don’t always turn out as planned – but Elsie has a knack for it.
THE TOWER
The tower is wonderful. Sometimes, it seems almost alive. There is a magical larder that produces endless cakes; a wardrobe containing new clothes; a spelloscope on the roof, so you can spy on your neighbours (who include the Howler sisters – two sweet little old ladies with tails and a thing about buckets!) and a room of stars containing a sparkling wheel, which you turn to make the tower move. (Actually, you don’t have to bother with that. It’s all an illusion – but the tower likes to put on a show.)
CORBETT
Corbett is the traditional raven that comes with a tower. He’s surly and grouchy and looks down his beak at other birds, especially pigeons. But Elsie can always get round him.
JOEY AND SYLPHINE
When she was tower-sitting Elsie became great friends with Joey the post boy, and Sylphine Greenmantle (real name: Aggie Wiggins) who dresses like a wood sprite and dances barefoot in the moonlight, although she probably shouldn’t. At the end of her week at the tower, Elsie went home with a bulging purse, a pair of magic dancing shoes and a whole new set of magical skills that she had to keep a secret because the people of Smallbridge just wouldn’t approve at all.
Her life went back to normal . . . boring days . . . weeks . . . months. . .
Then, on May Day, one of the few fun days of the year, the Red Witch showed up again! This time, she wanted Elsie’s help sorting out her mail order business, Sharp Spells On Tap, which was not going well. Lots of angry customers, a chaotic list of orders and a very grumpy Magenta. Well, Elsie jumped at the chance to help and learn more magic. So she spent another exciting week at the tower where she saved the business, learned new spells, visited a magical superstore, put a very rude genie in his place and dealt with some tricky crowd/animal control.
Elsie also learnt the secret of taking a shortcut. That’s witch talk for vanishing on the spot and popping up somewhere else. A very useful trick. . .
And, now that we’re all caught up with the important things, let’s find out what’s in store for Elsie this time. . .
Chapter One
DON’T DO IT TOO OFTEN
‘The trouble is,’ Elsie said to Joey, ‘I do it too often.’
It was opening time on a sunny Saturday and they were both leaning on the counter, deep in conversation. Nuisance was sitting upright in the doorway, eyes fixed lovingly on his two favourite people. Elsie’s dad was upstairs ironing his apron.
Joey had come to deliver the shop’s post – two coupons, some bills and an advertisement for rivets – although it was just an excuse to come and see Elsie really. Smallbridge wasn’t officially on his round. Usually he stuck to Crookfinger Forest. Elsie had given a happy squeal when she’d opened the shutters and seen him waiting outside with Nuisance.