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your name.

Dear Reader, When I started this project, this wasnt what it was going to be at all. I never planned on it, but sometimes what isnt planned turns out better then whatever was. The original idea concept started out as a music video I watched. It was the most emotional thing I had ever seen, and it only lasted six minutes. I decided that I wanted to see if I could get as much emotion with words as those six minutes had. I changed a bit and put my view on it. And this is the product of that. It starts out with a man who is told to kill a girl, but finds himself taking a different path then he expected, reuniting with his brother that he ran away from years ago. I hope you can see as much emotion as I did in those six minutes. Or if not, I hope you can see something. Sincerely,

Amelia St Clair

We started with desire, Conscience told us to stop, We couldnt. We met, With conflict That could only have one ending. We were merely human.

Big money involvedDONT screw this up!!

Name: classified. Height: 162 inches. Hair: brown. Thin. She will be at the place indicated on your map at 1:14 pm on Tuesday, May 23. You are

to make this as clean and

quiet as possible; no big show, no pools of blood. Just make her dead. We picked you for this job because we heard good things. Dont make us regret it.
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Big money. No wonder they wont tell me her name. But she looks so young 18? She could be the same age as me. Shes pretty. What did she do to make so many people want her dead? Whatever. Its not my job to ask questions. Its my job to pull the trigger. Im a good shot; it wont be painful to her. At least they didnt want to risk the chance of her living, and dont want me to make her suffer. Big money. There will be other people after her. Ill have to act fast, before my chance is gone. I need to remember to thank him for this. Im sure hell want a cut. Maybe itll be enough to stop for a while. Maybe I wont have to hurt people anymore. Maybe this girl will help me. Big money. Yeah, I bet shell help me.

My best gun. For my last job. For the person whose gonna save me, she deserves my best gun. One more bullet and Im done. Just one more. I hope.
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Im outside. They can shoot me. I deserve to die. Why havent they shot me yet? He has the best shot. Hes my age. I wonder how he found this life. I wonder how I found it. Why hasnt he killed me yet? Just fire the shot. Let me die. Please, make this pain go away. Make me forget what Ive done. Let me die.

Im crazy for doing this. But I cant do my job. I cant hurt her. Always, Ive been doing this. But her face stops me. I cant hurt her face. I cant hurt her.

I can shoot. Shes right there. I have the best shot. Five seconds, and it can be over. One bullet and I can be done. I cant shoot. Why cant I shoot? Theres someone else. He has a gun. Hes gonna shoot her. He shot her. Her arms bleeding. I shot him. Hes dead. He cant shoot her now. No. she fell. Shes hurt. She cant be hurt. If I had shot her, she wouldnt be hurt. I didnt shoot her. He did and shes hurt. Shes dying.

-She was supposed to save me. Why must I save her?6

Shes bleeding. I couldnt save her. I have to save her. He can save her. He has to save her. Theres so much blood. They taught how to make blood. I dont know how to take it away. He does.
I have to help her. That was the only thought in my head as I ran down the stairs of the building. Shes going to die. I have to help her. I have to get her to him before more of them try to hurt her. Before she dies. She cant die. I cant let her die.
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Pain. So much pain. I wish the other guy shot me. He could have killed me. He killed the guy who shot me. Why didnt he kill me to? So much pain. Its overbearing. It hurts so much. Hes gone now. Where did he go? Do I have to wait for more of them to find me before I die? It hurts so much. Why cant the pain disappear like he did? Why did he leave? He was my hope. Why did my hope disappear? It hurts so much. Why cant I just die?

The stairs were endless, and each one kept me farther and farther from her. How long will it take to get to him? Will she make it that far? Its been so long since I saw him. Will he help? He has to help. He wont let her die. Hed never let someone die. That was why he left in the first place.

And somehow, I was in love with her before I even touched that last step.

The man ran out of the building, heading straight towards the girl lying on the ground. As he reached her she met him with a strange gaze.

You why didnt you kill me? her voice was empty and honest, simply wanting an answer from the man. Because today isnt going to be the day that you die. I dont care what youve done or who you are, you arent going to die. He reached for her, getting her onto her feet. I know someone who can help you. Hes not far from here. okay. She looked at him, deciding if he was really trying to help her.

His house wasnt a house. It was an abandoned trailer hidden in a dump. So they wouldnt find him. So no one would. So he wouldnt become like me. I was lucky I remembered where it was. I was lucky he ever showed me. Back when he tried to convince me to come with him. I should have, but its too late now. I just hope hes there. I just hope he can save her. I led her farther into the dump, walking the familiar path I had used to leave this place so many years ago.

They ran into my house as I was sitting down for dinner. My brother and a girl who was bleeding out of her arm, losing a lot of blood. I hadnt seen my brother in years, but I could tell it was him from his dark blue eyes. No one besides my brother had eyes like that. But he looked horrible. They were both breathing heavily and he looked as if he was about to lose everything. He looked straight at my face and whispered a single word. please. He wanted me to help this girl. He knew I could never say no. I didnt eat that night.

Are you gonna tell me who she is? You know I cant. Will she be okay? I dont know. It was bad. The bullet hit a bad spot. I did what I could. All thats left is to wait. Hmm. I was always bad at that part. Thats why they just had you shoot. That only took seconds. I couldnt. She stopped me. Ive never not been able to shoot before. Sounds like someone has a crush.
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yeah.

Shes not going to be safe until theyre dead. I cant just sit around and wait. He said shell be okay, and as long as hes there I think shell be fine. I have to risk it. I can take care of them, and be back in time to take care of her. I can do it.

Take care of her.

Please.

I was going to make it better. I left to do my job, I didnt say goodbye. I wish I didnt make that mistake. I should have realizedI knew what would happen. I didnt want to believe it. I wanted to make it better. I didnt mean to make it worse. I did.

And just like that, he was gone. Like so many years ago, disappearing without a trace. Except this time he left her. And she was important enough for him to leave a sticky note telling me to take care of her. He may have been my brother, but he wasnt anymore. Those people destroyed him, the one person I tried so hard to save. I failed. But maybe she wouldnt, if shes already become so important to him. And then months passed, and I started wondering if she really was that important to him.
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You saved me. I only did what I was trained to do. And where did you learn that? My brother has his secrets. I do too. Dont we all. But still, thank you. I dont deserve your thanks. Why not? Because I saved you many others will die. Isnt that right? I wish it wasnt so.

He was a grim man. Not because of what the world had done to him, but because of what he had already done to the world. Like he knew he had done something terrible that he could never make up for. Like he had lost the battle by fighting the war. But he was also silly. Falling asleep in strange places, and thinking of the most random things. The sadness was tinged with a faint happiness, knowledge that the only choices he makes anymore solely affect him. I wish I could have that knowledge, I wish I could have the strength to try. But I have long since lost the chance to try. I wouldnt save anyone by changing now. It is far too late. But I stick close to this grim man, hoping that a small bit of his happiness will come to me. She was delicate. A small, fragile flower that was falling apart right in front of my eyes. She had no hope, but at the same time, it seemed like that was all she had. The ability to keep going; the one thing I thought I had lost so long ago. Where did he find her? I know he cant tell me. More than likely he barely knows more than I do. Like it matters. He left. I dont even know if hell ever be back. take care of her. What does that mean? For how long am I supposed to take care of her? But for some reason, I dont care. She keeps good company for someone who had just about been killed. I found myself enjoying her view, probably more then I should. But I couldnt help it. She was too perfect. I could see why he was in love with her.

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And sometimes, the inevitable happens. Not because we didnt try to stop it; but because it was the inevitable. It had to happen. You dont really get a choice on that matter.

Dont do this. You cant love her. He loves her. She probably loves him. You cant. Youve done too much bad to be with her. You cant love her. You were only supposed to save her. Never love her.

I didnt mean to. If I could be anymore sorry, But its what I feel.
Youre important to me. You know that right? Because I dont want to go through another day wondering and hoping and wishing and not knowing because its just- the girls speech was cut off as the man stepped forward and kissed her. Im so glad you said that.

love
Noun

[luhv] noun, verb, loved, loving.

1. A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2. A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. 3. Unavoidable happiness.
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It took me longer to find them then I had expected. Months, because I went off-grid. She was probably better now. I wonder if I could take her on a trip. That would be fun. Now that she was safe, we could do things like that. Maybe Ill even let him come, since he took care of her.

They were holding hands. Thing- things have changed since you left.

They were holding hands.

We didnt know if youd ever be back.

They were holding hands.

You left without telling us anything.

They were holding hands.

Its been months. Months.
They were holding hands.

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You didnt. I didnt mean to- Then why did you? You knew she was important to me. Important to you? Then why did you just disappear without telling either of us? I had to. You know what I do. You know I dont have a choice. You know I couldnt say anything to you. But I cant believe you did that. She was hurt. What else could I have done? You were gone for all we knew. So you do that? It wasnt just me- But you let it happen. It doesnt matter If you didnt start it, but you sure as hell didnt stop it! Why should i? You show up randomly after three years needing me to fix a gunshot wound and then you leave? What else could I do? Not that. She was important to me, and you did this? She was important to me too! Dont act like youre the only one who can mess up! We all make mistakes! He pulled out his gun. Then maybe its time I make another one.

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She jumped in front of him as soon as I pulled the gun out, trying to protect to the one of us she chose. Before she met my brother, I wonder if she would have once done the same for me. But Im connected with her through bad memories. You dont protect bad memories. They both had their eyes closed as I pointed the gun at them, too afraid to see what I would do. I was scared too, unsure of my choice. If I could go through with what my anger and pain had come up with. As I stared at their faces, I realized I was in the same spot I had started in. A gun pointed at her, yet my fingers unable to pull the trigger. Yet this time he was behind her, and my heart held a different reason other than money for wanting death. I looked at them, and realized what I had to do. The only thing I could do anymore. I moved my gun and changed my gaze to behind them, into the dark night sky. I didnt want to see their reactions when I did this. It was already painful enough. I took away my feelings and focused on my gun. The warm metal fit into my hand, comfortable after my years of using it. Years. I had done this for years. Yet it only took a couple of months for this to happen. For everything to change. I had been so used to being alone, and now I was terrified of it. Goodbye. The single word went out into the darkness, lasting forever. Nothing moved and no one made a sound. It was only a couple seconds, but it could have been years. I released a tear as I fired the gun, and let my eyes fall shut as the bullet tore through me.
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Only in a couple of years did I learn how to kill. Only in a couple of months did I learn how to love. Only in a couple of weeks did I learn how to smile. Only in a couple of days did I learn how to hurt. Only in a couple of minutes did I learn how to hate. Only in a couple of seconds did I learn how to die. But it took no time at all, to learn how to forgive. Or maybe thats what took forever.

And I guess, in the end, she did save me.

A tear, can be happy or sad. It depends on what caused it. You can win the entire world and not shed a tear, and you can trip and fall and cry until you cant anymore. You can cry from anything; but each tear is special. Each tear is a dream that has been completed, or given up. Each tear is a memory, which has been given away, for someone else to find when they need it. And as the tear dries up, and the memory starts to fade, so do the people who made it. And so does the happiness or sadness that made it a reality in the first place. But that doesnt mean it wasnt ever there.

Im sorry. You were dead before I could even tell you that I was sorry that I ended up making you kill yourself. Im sorry. You came to me to save someone, and all I did was end up making you dead. Im sorry Im just as horrible a person as you were. Im sorry we couldnt end everything right.
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we can still- I cant. she spoke with sincerity. I just cant. She started shaking. Twice hes saved me, yet Ill never be able to save him. I cant save whats already been lost. Twice hes saved me. Why couldnt I save him?

And I kept waiting. I kept waiting for you to come back and laugh in my face for thinking that you were ever gone. I kept waiting. But you kept waiting too.

We burned the body and left it somewhere neither of us would remember. Because if we couldnt remember, we wouldnt find it. And if we couldnt find it, theyd never find him. That was the least we could do for the person who was once my brother.
R.I.P. A good man who was faced with too many bad mistakes. May he have a better chance next time.
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And as time passes I realize that it had to happen. But, always, I hated that it had to be this way.

And we ran out of time trying to figure out how to stop the clock.

You cant blame us; we were only human.

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TOY- THAT I WAS ONCE BY YOUR SIDE

English translation: Thought Id deleted them, memories of you When I hang out with friends and get drunk I keep thinking of you, it wears me out I used to live such a life, always by myself I once believed that you were my savior Before drifting away Can you please remember just this? That I was once by your side Once in a while, thinking I might bump into you on the street I look at my shabby self in the mirror and make myself over You arent sick, are you? Im very worried Though you must be happy, I will pray for you Remember, even when you meet someone else That I was once by your side I was able to smile, when I was looking at you You had became my little shelter Before drifting away Can you please remember just this? That I was once by your side Once in a while, thinking I might bump into you on the street I look at my shabby self in the mirror and make myself over You arent sick, are you? Im very worried Though you must be happy, I will pray for you Remember, even when you meet someone else That I was once by your side You arent sick, are you? Im very worried Though you must be happy, I will pray for you Remember, even when you meet someone else That I was once by your side

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End Notes
For most of these, I put it in my project, and in the place it is, because I wanted it there. Not so much as it need to go to one place to further the story (which some did), but more so because it fit where it went. It worked. And even though theres other reasons (which are explained below), thats probably the biggest reason for everything in this project. It worked. And then again, maybe there was no reason at all.

Page 3 Picture- the themes. All of them in a single picture. Poem this introduces the themes, and really the entire course of the story. Page 4 Collage- this is his instructions about the girl, his next target. Starts to explain his past a bit. (Or at least, introduces the topic.) Page 5 Prose 1- explains his job more, shows that he doesnt like it as much. Prose 2- puts the girl in as the position as his savior his last job. (At least he hopes.) Prose 3- introduces her point of view, shows how depressed she is, how much she regrets whatever she has done. Page 6 Poem- his reaction to the girl, how he freezes up plays an important role (he fell in love with her.) Prose- his thoughts as he tries to process why he cant shoot her. Also, shows that she gets shot by another person, which really leads the story a vast amount. Thought- again, this page was more so his reaction page. This mentions the savior idea again. Page 7 Poem- this deals with his reaction to her gunshot wound, and introduces the brother, or at least, mentions the brother. Prose- a bit of action. Shows him running down the stairs of the building to come to her rescue. Page 8 Prose- the girls depression- talks again about how he was going to be saving her by pulling the trigger. 20

Prose- him, running down the stairs to get to her, thinking about his brother, mentions brothers past. Sentence- says hes in love with her. Main theme and driving point for the story. dialogue- scene with him and the girl. He convinces the girl to go with him to his brothers to fix her arm. Page 9 Prose- introduces setting Scene- introduces brother and shows kindness of him. Dialogue- talks about past between the brothers, brings up love. Page 10 Prose- brings up what he hasnt completed, and the fact that he feels useless doing nothing Poem- huge foreshadowing Prose- brothers point of view, introduces major time passing. Page 11 Dialogue- real meeting between her and the brother. Mentions her past. Prose- her falling for the brother. Prose-the brother falling for her. Page 12 Saying- introduces concept of other love Prose- brother regretting the fact that he knows hes in love with the same person his brother loves. Poem- regret on brothers part Scene- clash of emotions, two come together. Exposisition- concept of love again. Page 13 Prose- back to main guy, shows time has passed. Scene- realization of what has happened between his brother and the woman he was in love with.

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Page 14 Dialogue- climax, shouting and yelling as both brothers realize that the worst thing that could happen did. Page 15 Prose- The font name I chose for this piece probably explains more for this piece then I ever could. Freedom. Its the point where he finds his freedom. The point where he sees everything that happens and realizes what needs to still happen. Personally, I really like this piece. It shows insecurity and bravery at the same time. It shows someone looking back on his life and figuring out the next point he needs to travel to. Even if hes too scared to look at what hes leaving behind. Page 16 Poem- acceptance and realization that the girl actually did save him. Just in a different way than he had thought. Prose- fits the feel of the scene. It works. Theres nothing more than that really. Prose- the brothers apology. Page 17 Dialogue- the girl breaks down after his death. Poem- the girls wish that it wasnt goodbye. Prose- in the brothers view, what happened next. Page 18 Closure- revisits the themes. Final thoughts. Page 19 Song- a goodbye with all of them. It worked. The lyrics cant be more perfect.

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