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Positive Parenting Michelle Roberts ECE 355 Understanding Behavior & Family Dynamics Suzanne LeBeau December 23 2013

Implications of Positive Parenting


Positive parenting is a purposeful and powerful approach to parenting. It is geared to make a significant difference in all aspects of child development- intellectual, emotional and social (Bugwadia 2010). Positive parenting can have far-reaching implications on children from all walks of life- -irrespective of the professional, social and economic status of their parents. It entails lovingly understanding and supporting ones children with an intent to raise them as intelligent, responsible and capable human beings (Bugwadia 2010).

Turner & Welch. (2012) Parenting in Contemporary Society. Pearson Education Inc.
http://www.parenthood360.com/index.php/positive-parenting-its-implications-on-children-8659/

Parents have a very important role in childrens lives, they establish childrens foundational skills and life traits. Children learn by example and who better to teach children than their parents. There is a lot on parents now more than ever, parents need to receive the information that will help them be a positive parent and allow for to grow and develop in all areas of their lives. There are experiences throughout our lives that establish a foundation for our ability to parent someday (Turner and Welch pg. 94).

Positive Characteristics of Mothering


Children are treated as individuals because every child is different. Helps children find there direction in life and supports it. Is a good listener in every aspect of listening and shows the child respect at the same time. Mothers are nurturers. Understands the importance of verbal and physical interactions. When children feel and know they have the love and support of their mom, they will be happier and healthier children and they will do better in school.

Positive Characteristics of Fathering


Commitment, self-sacrifice, integrity, and unconditional love. Their engagement with their children. They need to be accessible to their children. Fathers take responsibility of and for their children.

Fathers have a huge impact on their childrens lives. Children need their father to be actively involved in their lives.

Helping toddlers
Setting limits- has to be done firmly and consistently and done in a loving way. Children need limits and when they do not obey there needs to be consequences. Parents need to understand the importance of age appropriate limits and consequences and getting down on the childs level and talking with the child not to the child. Toilet training- has to be tackled only when the child is ready and works when it is done in a way that interest the child. Many parents put expectations on their child to get potty trained early for many different reasons. However if the child is not physically and mentally ready they will not get potty trained when the parents are wanting it to happen. Children need to be encouraged and be allowed freedoms to make their own choices, however they must know and understand your expectations for and of them.

Bullying
Bullying is a widespread and serious issue. What was once brushed aside as a rite of passage, when kids were advised to "tough it out," is now understood as a potentially catastrophic problem among youth today. According to BullyingStatistics.org, 160,000 children in the U.S miss school each day for fear of being bullied. And with improved technology and the pervasive use of social media, inappropriate behavior between kids can occur outside of school hours via emails, text messages, and Facebook posts. These exchanges, known as cyberbullying, can be particularly hurtful and aggressive, especially if they are anonymous, and their harmful effects are often brought back into school the next day. Whether it's verbal or physical, bullying is a threat to children of all ages (Schuman ). Learn how to help your child cope with the effects of bullying. http://www.parents.com/kids/problems/bullying/bullying-and-stress/

Bullying
1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. Ways to help children deal with being bullied. Watch for signs of unusual behavior in your child. Talk to your children about their social life. Be an example by using appropriate behavior and language. Build up your childs self-esteem. Teach children that it is not their fault and they are not alone. Stop bullying at home, let children know that it is not acceptable. Stay communicated with your childs school, teachers need to know your concerns and be able to discuss theirs with you

Limited caretaking and involuntary caretaking of children by grandparents


Grandparents often play pivotal roles in the lives of grandchildren, but their roles change drastically when they become the primary caregivers for their grandchildren (Reynolds, Wright, & Beale, 2003) (Strutton and Leddick). Voluntary care providers assume the parental role and responsibilities of raising their grandchildren either the majority of time or all of the time Involuntary caretaking grandparents have become full-time custodians with little or no forewarning and not by personal preference (Roe & Minkler, 1998- 1999)(Strutton and Leddick). Grandparents raising their grandchildren is not easy, because grandparents do not get the respect and support that they need. Grandparents raising their grandchildren is becoming more and more the norm. Children can be a blessing to their grandparents and grandparents can be a blessing to their Grandchildren, it may not always be easy but it will and is rewarding.

Sponsored by the Office of Child Support Enforcement (OCSE) at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) and the Ford Foundation,1 the Partners for Fragile Families (PFF) demonstration program intended to effect systems change, deliver appropriate and effective services, and improve outcomes for both parents and children in low-income families. By making lasting changes in the way public agencies and community organizations work with unmarried families, the initiative aimed to increase the capacity of young, economically disadvantaged fathers and mothers to become financial, emotional, and nurturing resources to their children and to reduce poverty and welfare dependence. The PFF demonstration, which built upon lessons from programs and demonstrations that operated over the past two decades, was implemented over a three-year period beginning in 2000 at 13 project sites in nine states.

Partners for Fragile Families is an organization that is designed to help keep families together and taken care of. It is a program that is about teaching fathers how to take care of their children.

The PFF projects sought to help government agencies (especially CSE agencies) and community- and faith-based organizations provide more flexible and responsive programs at the state and local levels to better support the needs of children living in fragile families (Martinson, Nightingale, Barnow and Trutko). Partners for Fragile Families Demonstration Projects: Employment and Child Support Outcomes and Trends

Poverty affects both parents and children


For children of all ages, poverty has some devastating effects. A study conducted by the U.S. Department of Education found that for every year a child spends in poverty, there is the chance that the child will fall behind grade level by age 18. For parents struggling to raise a child, poverty adds extensive stress to the family. McLoyd (1990) states that economic hardship experienced by lower-class families is associated with anxiety, depression, and irritability (Driscoll and Nagel 2010). When families live in poverty the adults can become stressed due to the financial problems that are taking place.
Poverty and The Effects on Children and Parents By A. Driscoll|N.G. Nagel Pearson Allyn Bacon Prentice Hall Updated on Jul 20, 2010

Families in poverty, when parents are working, are influenced by the kind of occupations in which the parents work. Kohn (1977) has found that lower-class parents look at their children's behavior with a focus on its immediate consequences and its external characteristics, whereas middle-class parents explore their children's motives and the attitudes expressed by their behavior. Kohn interpreted these differences as connected to the characteristics associated with the level of occupation. Bronfenbrenner and Crouter (1982) concur that parents' workplaces affect their perceptions of life and the way they interact with family members. Consequently, their parenting styles reflect aspects of their work life (Driscoll and Nagel 2010). Poverty can have long term affects on childrens development. The impacts of poverty on parents and children is due to the stress , and alienation due to having little to no income. The way poverty impacts children can be a result of their parents behavior and experiences, children learn by example. Family poverty and low socio-economic status are consistently related to poorer school performance and low school retention rates. Young people from low socio-economic backgrounds are early school leavers. Those with low achievement at school are more likely to be unemployed, out of the labor market, in part-time employment (McClelland et al. 1998) (Shahab).

www.education.com Parenting and Families

Educational outcomes are one of the key areas influenced by family incomes. Children from low-income families often start school already behind their peers who come from more affluent families, as shown in measures of school readiness. The incidence, depth, duration and timing of poverty all influence a childs educational attainment, along with community characteristics and social networks (Ferguson 2007). In order for children to succeed in school , requires physical well-being and proper motor development, emotional health. Six poverty-related factors are known to impact child development in general and school readiness in particular. They are the incidence of poverty, the depth of poverty, the duration of poverty, the timing of poverty (eg, age of child), community characteristics (eg, concentration of poverty and crime in neighborhood, and school characteristics) and the impact poverty has on the childs social network (parents, relatives and neighbors). A childs home has a particularly strong impact on school readiness (Ferguson 2007). When children are raised in poverty are more likely to not have their needs met. It is important that teachers are able to notice when children are going through difficult things at home. It is important that there is a line of communication between the teacher and the parents.

Negative effects of divorce


Adjustment to divorce can take up to two years or even longer. Many children will adjust to their parents' divorce, but some will continue to have significant problems into adulthood. Parents' sensitivity to their child's needs is one of the most important factors in facilitating adjustment. Other factors such as the child's age, gender and temperament will also influence how well the child adjusts (Foulkes-Jamison). Boys and girls tend to react differently to their parents' divorce. As a rule, girls tend to become anxious and withdrawn, while boys tend to become more aggressive and disobedient. Girls from divorced families may become sexually active earlier than girls from intact families. Interestingly, boys often adjust better when their mothers remarry, while girls have more difficulty (Foulkes-Jamison).

A child's relationship with his or her parents following a divorce is critical to the child's adjustment. Although the distress of not being with both parents is one of the most painful parts of divorce, it is the continuing relationship that children have with their parents that is essential to their long-term adjustment. This highlights the importance of not criticizing the other parent in front of the child (Foulkes). If the child's parents have difficulty coping with stress, the child's adjustment will be at risk, especially if the child has a 'difficult' temperament. A child with such a temperament will have significant problems coping when faced with disruptions in routine and when their parents experience increased stress and demands. These children may become more difficult to manage after the divorce. A child's adjustment to divorce will be quicker when fewer disruptions are caused by the divorce and when an established routine is achieved (Foulkes). There are many factors that divorce affects among the family members. Emotional pain and suffering, feeling insecure, anxious, lower self-esteem, aggressive , depression, poor social skills, high divorce rates, learning problems, negative effects in school. By Reinier Bloem http://www.children-and-divorce.com/children-negative-effects-ofdivorce.html

Value family-this is about putting family first. Prioritize family-fun- this is about enjoying family time. Family-work balance is a complex issue that involves financial values, gender roles, career paths, time management and many other factors. Hidden values and models from our cultures, original families and other sources influence our choices in ways that we often dont anticipate or understand and that have far-reaching consequences for our lives (stayhitched.com). Family is important and as difficult as it can be , your family should be the most important to you other than God. Sometimes you have to make decisions to put all technology aside and play with your children and take time off work and go on family outings or vacations. The family has to be balanced in order to have peace and a happy family environment.

Homelessness Every year, hundreds of thousands of American families become homeless, including more than 1.6 million children. These children are hidden from our view, but they are living in shelters, cars, and campgrounds. They are young and scared, and their parents and families are frustrated and desperate.(familyhomelessness.org). Homelessness impacts health, experiences of violence, developmental milestones.

Learning Disabilities
These are some ways parents facilitate learning disabilities that their child may have. Create opportunities for your child to have success with minimal frustration. Build up your childs confidence. Always say what you mean it is important that mean what you say. Teach your children by being a positive model for them, because children learn by example. Inform your child of new situations. Millions of American school children and their parents struggle with serious learning problems and the issues they produce. In order to understand learning disabilities, parents must develop a better understanding of learning processes and potential reading, writing, math and attention difficulties, and learn specific strategies and resources for responding, and hear from a range of learning disability experts. Gain perspective on learning disabilities by exploring a variety of learning problems, treatments, and expert opinions(pbs.org/parents).

The following general tips are intended to help all children improve their organizational skills, work habits, and overall production with schoolwork. We encourage you to print and share this list with the learning disabled children in your life.

Get organized. Organize all of your materials, books, notebooks, etc. Plan and budget time. Make a plan that includes budgeting the amount of time needed for different subjects, break times, and due dates for assignments. Color code. Use a color-coding system to organize materials for each subject. Record assignments. Use an assignment notebook to record all homework and long-term projects. Be methodical. Organize all your books, notes, handouts, flashcards, study-guides, outlines, etc. before studying for a test or quiz. Think small. Remember to break-up long-term assignments into small, manageable, working chunks in your daily homework schedule. Know your best time of day. Choose to study during the time of day or night when you are most alert. Take breaks. Take scheduled breaks during long homework assignments. Double-check your work. Make sure to check your assignments for errors before turning them in to your teacher. Take advantage of resources. Ask teachers, parents, and tutors for extra help and clarification. http://www.pbs.org/parents/education/learning-disabilities/basics/what-is-a-learning-disability/

Adoption

It is important to understand that the process of adoption and the removal from an
orphanage or foster home to an entirely different home in another country is a huge change for a baby, and it can be quite traumatic (rainbowkids.com). Going to school provides wonderful opportunities for children to learn and develop new skills and friendships. Adopted childrenespecially those whose pre-adoption history included abuse, neglect, or orphanage lifeoften run into unique educational challenges. These challenges can be related to the learning itself, answering questions from classmates or teachers about relinquishment or adoption, or completing school assignments that are personal and painful (bethanylifelines.org).

Books that are about adoption. Grab your tissues and sit down to read Motherbridge of Love. Written to benefit well known author and women and children's advocate Xinran's charity The Mothers' Bridge of Love, the text of this book is a poem that was written and given anonymously for this purpose. Reviewed at length already here, this book reads like a fable that will invite all sorts of interesting conversations for your family. When Karen Henry Clark faced the fact that her daughter's whole first year of life in China would forever be a mystery, she created a story of her own, a fairytale, to inspire her daughter's imagination. . Elfa and the Box of Memories, published by BAAF (a London based adoption/foster care charity) and written by their marketing officer, is seriously a must-have book for foster families and an excellent book for any families with children who struggle with navigating memories--both good and bad.

Quality Childcare Program High-quality care is the result of a combination of a healthy and safe environment together with educational and social stimulation appropriate to the age and development of the children being served (Fraenkel, 2003). These features of quality child care include both structural elements relating to the physical environment and staffing requirement and process elements relating to curricular practices, caregiver qualities, and parental involvement (Wortham, 2006) (Barbour,Barbour and Scully). I would like to express my feelings on child care centers. I believe that it is important to ask questions and to make drop in visits to the center before leaving your child in their care. My program is designed for children of all ages. I have teachers in every room certified in first aid and cpr. I believe that classes should be small so every child is able to get one on one time with the teacher. My center is NACEY certified. I take pride in all my employees and because of that I do not have a great deal of turn over. I also use the program Zoo Phonics and the children and parents really enjoy the program. Please feel free to come to me at any time I support an open door policy.

References
http://fcs.tamu.edu/families/parenting/fathering/fathering_text/responsible _fatherhood.php http://www.families.com/blog/characteristics-of-a-good-mother http://www.parenthood360.com/index.php/positive-parenting-itsimplications-on-children-8659/ http://www.parents.com/kids/problems/bullying/bullying-andstress/?page=2 Turner & Welch. (2012) Parenting in Contemporary Society. Pearson Education Inc. http://www.pbs.org/parents/education/learning-disabilities/basics/what-isa-learning-disability/ http://www.familyhomelessness.org/families.php?p=ts http://www.education.com/reference/article/features-quality-child-care/ http://www.chsfs.org/blog/favorite-adoption-themed-childrensbookshttp://www.rainbowkids.com/articledetails.aspx?id=530

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