Discover the People Principles that Work for You Every Time
St. Martin's Press; New York, 2006
Most of the successes in But what does it take to win About the Author:
businesses and personal life people? “Winning with People”
come from initiating by John C. Maxwell offers the In 1985, John
relationships with the right basic principles for building M a x w e l l
people and then strengthening good relationships with others founded The
those relationships by using that work every time. INJOY Group, a
collection of
good people skills. Stanley read the summary three distinct
Allyn said that, “Human companies that
relation is the most important employ 200
science in living. The most people and
provide resources and services
useful person in the world that help people reach their
today is the man or woman personal and leadership
who knows how to get along potential. In addition to building
with people.” a successful organization, John
has authored more than thirty
books, including the New York
However, most people fall into Times best sellers The 21
the trap of taking relationships Irrefutable Laws of
at work or at home for granted. Leadership and Failing
Forward.
You may also know of some
Called the nation's foremost
people who are talented, but expert on leadership, John was
who cannot succeed in life born in central Ohio five and a
because they are difficult to half decades ago. He credits his
deal with. This means building excellent leadership instincts
and his early leadership training
relationships and winning to his father.
people is extremely important. More author info
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Ÿ Tone. People often respond to our attitudes People who remain self-centered and self-serving
and actions more than to our words. The next will always have a hard time getting along with
time a person says something to you in anger, others. To help them break that pattern of living,
respond with gentleness and kindness. When they need the big picture, which requires three
you do that, the person who spoke harshly is things: Perspective, Maturity and responsibility.
likely to tone down, if not soften his attitude.
7. The Exchange Principle
Ÿ Temperature. If the reaction is worse than Instead of putting others in their place, you must
the action, the problem usually increases. If the
put yourself in their place.
reaction is less than the action, the problem
usually decreases.
You naturally do not see yourself and others from
the same perspective. When you fail to see things
If you desire to develop a softer touch with
from the perspective of others, you fail in your
people, take the following advice to heart:
relationships. Learning to see things from others'
Ÿ Let the past stay in the past. perspectives helps you succeed in your
Ÿ Ask yourself; is my reaction part of the relationships.
problem?
Ÿ Remember that actions are remembered 8. The Learning Principle
long after words are forgotten. Each person you meet has the potential to teach
Ÿ Never let the situation mean more that you something. Every person has an attitude. All
the relationship. people fall into one of the categories described by
Ÿ Treat your loved ones with unconditional the following statements:
love. Ÿ No one can teach me anything- Arrogant
Ÿ Admit wrongs and ask forgiveness. attitude.
Ÿ Someone can teach me everything- naive
5. The Elevator Principle attitude
The principle says that you can lift people up or Ÿ Everyone can teach me something-
take people down in your relationships. People teachable attitude.
can be the wind beneath your wings or the
anchor of your boat. The intensity in with which 9. The Charisma Principle
we lift or lower others can determine that there People are interested in the person who is
are really four kinds of people when it comes to interested in them.
relationships.
Ÿ Some people add something to life- you There are six ways to make people like you:
enjoy them. Ÿ Become genuinely interested in other
Ÿ Some people subtract something from people.
life- you tolerate then Ÿ Smile
Ÿ Some people multiply something in life- Ÿ Remember that person's name is to him or
you value them. her the sweetest and most important sound.
Ÿ Some people divide something in life- Ÿ Be a good listener- encourage others to talk
you avoid them. about themselves.
Ÿ Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
Ÿ Make the other person feel important, and
do it sincerely.
II. Are You Willing to Focus on Others?
10. The Number 10 Principle
6. The Big Picture Principle Believe that the best in people usually brings the
The entire population of the world, with one best out of people. Here are “5 things I know about
minor exception, is composed of others. people“ by Jim Dobson:
Everybody wants somebody. available for others and putting them at ease. To
put people at ease you can exhibit personal
Nobody cares how much you know until he warmth, appreciation for the differences of
knows how much you care.
people, consistency mood, sensitivity toward
Everybody needs somebody. people's feelings, understanding human
Anybody that helps somebody influences weakness and exposure of their own, ability to
lots of bodies. forgive easily and quickly ask for forgiveness and
Somebody today will rise up and become authenticity.
somebody.
16. The Foxhole Principle
11. The Confrontation Principle When preparing for battle, dig a hole big enough
Caring for people should precede confronting for a friend or a colleague. You face many kinds of
people. This is about caring enough to confront battles in life, and the “foxholes” you sometimes
the right way. It speaks of the road map to a inhabit come in many shapes and sizes. The
healthy confrontation and handling conflict in home is the most important one. And of course,
tough situations. the people who accompany you in these places
are as varied as they are. Foxholes prove
friendships.
IV. Are You Willing to Invest In Others? 21. The High Road Principle
You go to a higher level when you treat others
17. The Gardening Principle better than they treat you. High roaders
All relationships need cultivation. In order for a understand that it's not what happens to you but
relationship to grow, it needs proper amount of what happens in you that really matters. High
caring to achieve a healthy growth. People roaders commit themselves to traveling the high
come to our lives for a reason. Some people road continually.
come into our lives for a season and some
come into our lives for a lifetime.
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