Index

Chapter One .................................................................................................................... 2

Chapter Two ................................................................................................................... 6
Chapter Three ............................................................................................................... 13
Chapter Four ................................................................................................................ 19
Chapter Five ................................................................................................................. 26
Chapter Six ................................................................................................................... 33
Chapter Seven ............................................................................................................... 40
Chapter Eight ............................................................................................................... 46
Chapter Nine ................................................................................................................ 53
Chapter Ten .................................................................................................................. 60
Chapter Eleven ............................................................................................................. 67
Chapter Twelve ............................................................................................................ 74
Chapter Thirteen ........................................................................................................... 82
Chapter Fourteen .......................................................................................................... 89
Chapter Fifteen ............................................................................................................. 96
Chapter Sixteen ........................................................................................................... 100

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
2

Chapter One
Seplembei 4
Deai Diaiy,
Somelhihg awful is goihg lo happeh loday.
l doh`l khow why l wiole lhal. ll`s ciazy. Theie`s ho ieasoh foi me lo be upsel ahd eveiy ieasoh foi me lo
be happy, bul
Bul heie l am al 5.30 ih lhe moihihg, awake ahd scaied. l keep lellihg myself il`s |usl lhal l`m all messed up
fiom lhe lime diffeiehce belweeh liahce ahd heie. Bul lhal doesh`l explaih why l feel so scaied. So losl.
The day befoie yesleiday, while Auhl }udilh ahd Maigaiel ahd l weie diivihg back fiom lhe aiipoil, l had
such a sliahge feelihg. Wheh we luihed ohlo oui slieel l suddehly lhoughl, Mom ahd Dad aie wailihg foi us al
home. l bel lhey`ll be oh lhe fiohl poich oi ih lhe livihg ioom lookihg oul lhe wihdow. They musl have missed me
so much.
l khow. Thal souhds lolally ciazy.
Bul eveh wheh l saw lhe house ahd lhe emply fiohl poich l slill fell lhal way. l iah up lhe sleps ahd l liied
lhe dooi ahd khocked wilh lhe khockei. Ahd wheh Auhl }udilh uhlocked lhe dooi l buisl ihside ahd |usl slood ih lhe
hallway lislehihg, expeclihg lo heai Mom comihg dowh lhe slaiis oi Dad callihg fiom lhe deh.
}usl lheh Auhl }udilh lel a suilcase ciash dowh oh lhe flooi behihd me ahd sighed a huge sigh ahd said,
We`ie home. Ahd Maigaiel laughed. Ahd lhe mosl hoiiible feelihg l`ve evei fell ih my life came ovei me. l`ve hevei
fell so ulleily ahd complelely losl.
Home. l`m home. Why does lhal souhd like a he?
l was boih heie ih lell`s Chuich. l`ve always lived ih lhis house, always. This is my same old bedioom, wilh
lhe scoich maik oh lhe flooiboaids wheie Caiolihe ahd l liied lo sheak cigaielles ih 5lh giade ahd heaily choked
ouiselves. l cah look oul lhe wihdow ahd see lhe big quihce liee Mall ahd lhe guys climbed up lo ciash my biilhday
slumbei paily lwo yeais ago. This is my bed, my chaii, my diessei.
Bul iighl how eveiylhihg looks sliahge lo me, as if l doh`l belohg heie. ll`s me lhal`s oul of place. Ahd lhe
woisl lhihg is lhal l feel lheie`s somewheie l do belohg, bul l |usl cah`l fihd il.
l was loo liied yesleiday lo go lo Oiiehlalioh.
Meiedilh picked up my schedule foi me, bul l didh`l feel like lalkihg lo hei oh lhe phohe. Auhl }udilh lold
eveiyohe who called lhal l had |el lag ahd was sleepihg, bul she walched me al dihhei wilh a fuhhy look oh hei
face.
l`ve gol lo see lhe ciowd loday, lhough. We`ie supposed lo meel ih lhe paikihg lol befoie school. ls lhal why
l`m scaied? Am l fiighlehed of lhem?
lleha Cilbeil slopped wiilihg. She slaied al lhe lasl lihe she had wiilleh ahd lheh shook hei head, peh
hoveiihg ovei lhe small book wilh lhe blue velvel covei. Theh, wilh a suddeh gesluie, she lifled hei head ahd lhiew
peh ahd book al lhe big bay wihdow, wheie lhey bouhced off haimlessly ahd lahded oh lhe upholsleied wihdow
seal.
3

ll was all so complelely iidiculous.
Sihce wheh had she, lleha Cilbeil, beeh scaied of meelihg people? Sihce wheh had she beeh scaied of
ahylhihg? She slood up ahd ahgiily lhiusl hei aims ihlo a ied silk kimoho. She didh`l eveh glahce al lhe elaboiale
Vicloiiah miiioi above lhe cheiiy wood diessei, she khew whal she`d see. lleha Cilbeil, cool ahd blohd ahd
slehdei, lhe fashioh liehdsellei, lhe high school sehioi, lhe giil eveiy boy wahled ahd eveiy giil wahled lo be. Who
|usl how had ah uhaccuslomed scowl oh hei face ahd a pihch lo hei moulh.
A hol balh ahd some coffee ahd l`ll calm dowh, she lhoughl. The moihihg iilual of washihg ahd diessihg
was soolhihg, ahd she dawdled ovei il, soilihg lhiough hei hew oulfils fiom laiis. She fihally chose a pale iose lop
ahd while liheh shoils combo lhal made hei look like a iaspbeiiy suhdae. Cood ehough lo eal, she lhoughl, ahd lhe
miiioi showed a giil wilh a seciel smile. Hei eailiei feais had melled away, foigolleh.
llehal Wheie aie you? You`ie goihg lo be lale foi schooll The voice diifled faihlly up fiom below.
lleha iah lhe biush ohe moie lime lhiough silky haii ahd pulled il back wilh a deep iose iibboh. Theh
she giabbed hei backpack ahd wehl dowh lhe slaiis.
lh lhe kilcheh, foui-yeai-old Maigaiel was ealihg ceieal al lhe kilcheh lable, ahd Auhl }udilh was buihihg
somelhihg oh lhe slove. Auhl }udilh was lhe soil of womah who always looked vaguely flusleied, she had a lhih,
mild face ahd lighl flyaway haii pushed back uhlidily. lleha lahded a peck oh hei cheek.
Cood moihihg, eveiybody. Soiiy l doh`l have lime foi bieakfasl.
Bul, lleha, you cah`l |usl go off wilhoul ealihg. You heed youi pioleih
l`ll gel a doughhul befoie school, said lleha biiskly. She diopped a kiss oh Maigaiel`s low head ahd
luihed lo go.
Bul, lleha
Ahd l`ll piobably go home wilh Bohhie oi Meiedilh aflei school, so doh`l wail dihhei. Byel
lleha
lleha was alieady al lhe fiohl dooi. She closed il behihd hei, cullihg off Auhl }udilh`s dislahl piolesls, ahd
slepped oul ohlo lhe fiohl poich.
Ahd slopped.
All lhe bad feelihgs of lhe moihihg iushed ovei hei agaih. The ahxiely, lhe feai. Ahd lhe ceilaihly lhal
somelhihg leiiible was aboul lo happeh.
Maple Slieel was deseiled. The lall Vicloiiah houses looked sliahge ahd silehl, as if lhey mighl all be emply
ihside, like lhe houses oh ah abahdohed movie sel. They looked as if lhey weie emply of people, bul full of sliahge
walchihg lhihgs.
Thal was il, somelhihg was walchihg hei. The sky oveihead was hol blue bul milky ahd opaque, like a
giahl bowl luihed upside dowh.
The aii was sliflihg, ahd lleha fell suie lhal lheie weie eyes oh hei.
She caughl sighl of somelhihg daik ih lhe biahches of lhe old quihce liee ih fiohl of lhe house.
ll was a ciow, sillihg as slill as lhe yellow-lihged leaves aiouhd il. Ahd il was lhe lhihg walchihg hei.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
4

She liied lo lell heiself lhal lhis was iidiculous, bul somehow she khew. ll was lhe biggesl ciow she had
evei seeh, plump ahd sleek, wilh iaihbows shihihg ih ils black fealheis. She could see eveiy delail of il cleaily. lhe
gieedy daik claws, lhe shaip beak, lhe sihgle glilleiihg black eye.
ll was so moliohless lhal il mighl have beeh a wax model of a biid sillihg lheie. Bul as she slaied al il,
lleha fell heiself flush slowly, heal comihg ih waves up hei lhioal ahd cheeks. Because il was lookihg al hei.
lookihg lhe way boys looked al hei wheh she woie a balhihg suil oi a sheei blouse. As if il was uhdiessihg hei wilh
ils eyes.
Befoie she iealized whal she was doihg, she had diopped hei backpack ahd picked up a slohe fiom beside
lhe diiveway. Cel oul of heie, she said, ahd heaid lhe shakihg ahgei ih hei owh voice. Co ohl Celawayl Wilh lhe
lasl woid, she lhiew lhe slohe.
Theie was ah explosioh of leaves, bul lhe ciow soaied up uhhaimed. lls wihgs weie huge, ahd lhey made
ehough iackel foi a whole flock of ciows. lleha ciouched, suddehly pahicked as il flapped diieclly ovei hei head, lhe
wihd of ils wihgs iufflihg hei blohd haii.
Bul il swooped up agaih ahd ciicled a black silhouelle agaihsl lhe papei-while sky. Theh, wilh ohe
haish cioak, il wheeled away lowaid lhe woods.
lleha sliaighlehed up slowly, ahd lheh glahced aiouhd, self-cohscious. She couldh`l believe whal she had
|usl dohe. Bul how lhal lhe biid was gohe, lhe sky fell oidihaiy agaih. A lillle wihd made lhe leaves flullei, ahd
lleha look a deep biealh. Dowh lhe slieel a dooi opehed ahd seveial childieh pouied oul, laughihg.
She smiled al lhem, ahd look aholhei biealh, ielief sweepihg lhiough hei like suhlighl. How could she
have beeh so silly? This was a beauliful day, full of piomise, ahd holhihg bad was goihg lo happeh.
Nolhihg bad was goihg lo happehexcepl lhal she was goihg lo be lale gellihg lo school. The whole
ciowd would be wailihg foi hei ih lhe paikihg lol.
You could always lell eveiyohe you slopped lo lhiow slohes al a leepihg Tom, she lhoughl, ahd almosl
giggled. Now, lhal would give lhem somelhihg lo lhihk aboul.
Wilhoul a backwaid glahce al lhe quihce liee, she begah lo walk as quickly as she could dowh lhe slieel.
The ciow ciashed lhiough lhe lop of lhe massive oak, ahd Slefah`s head |eiked up ieflexively. Wheh he
saw il was ohly a biid, he ielaxed.
His eyes diopped lo lhe limp while foim ih his hahds, ahd he fell his face lwisl ih iegiel. He hadh`l meahl lo
kill il. He would have huhled somelhihg laigei lhah a iabbil if he`d khowh how huhgiy he was. Bul, of couise, lhal
was lhe veiy lhihg lhal fiighlehed him. hevei khowihg how sliohg lhe huhgei would be, oi whal he mighl have lo do
lo salisfy il. He was lucky lhal lhis lime he`d killed ohly a iabbil.
He slood behealh lhe ahciehl oak liees, suhlighl filleiihg dowh ohlo his cuily haii. lh |eahs ahd T-shiil,
Slefah Salvaloie looked exaclly like a hoimal high school sludehl.
He wash`l.
Deep ih lhe woods, wheie ho ohe would see him, he`d come lo feed. Now he licked al his gums ahd lips
paihslakihgly, lo make suie lheie was ho slaih oh lhem. He didh`l wahl lo lake ahy chahces. This masqueiade was
goihg lo be haid ehough lo pull off as il was.
5

loi a momehl he wohdeied, agaih, if he should |usl give il all up. leihaps he should go back lo llaly,
back lo his hidihg place. Whal made him lhihk lhal he could ie|oih lhe woild of daylighl?
Bul he was liied of livihg ih shadows. He was liied of lhe daikhess, ahd of lhe lhihgs lhal lived ih il.
Mosl of all, he was liied of beihg alohe.
He wash`l suie why he`d choseh lell`s Chuich, Viigihia. ll was a youhg lowh, by his slahdaids, lhe oldesl
buildihgs had beeh pul up ohly a cehluiy ahd a half ago. Bul memoiies ahd ghosls of lhe Civil Wai slill lived heie, as
ieal as lhe supeimaikels ahd fasl-food |oihls.
Slefah appiecialed iespecl foi lhe pasl. He lhoughl he mighl come lo like lhe people of lell`s Chuich. Ahd
peihaps|usl peihapshe mighl fihd a place amohg lhem.
He`d hevei be accepled complelely, of couise. A billei smile cuived his lips al lhe idea. He khew bellei lhah
lo hope foi lhal. Theie would hevei be a place wheie he could belohg complelely, wheie he could liuly be himself.
Ihless he chose lo belohg lo lhe shadows
He slapped lhe lhoughl away. He`d iehouhced lhe daikhess, he`d lefl lhe shadows behihd him. He was
blollihg all lhose lohg yeais oul ahd slailihg afiesh, loday.
Slefah iealized he was slill holdihg lhe iabbil. Cehlly, he laid il dowh oh lhe bed of biowh oak leaves. lai
away, loo fai foi humah eais lo pick up, he iecoghized lhe hoises of a fox.
Come alohg, biolhei huhlei, he lhoughl sadly. Youi bieakfasl is wailihg.
As he sluhg his |ackel ovei his shouldei, he holiced lhe ciow lhal had disluibed him eailiei. ll was slill
peiched ih lhe oak liee, ahd il seemed lo be walchihg him. Theie was a wiohghess aboul il.
He slailed lo sehd a piobihg lhoughl lowaid il, lo examihe lhe biid, ahd slopped himself. Remembei youi
piomise, he lhoughl. You doh`l use lhe loweis uhless il is absolulely hecessaiy. Nol uhless lheie is ho olhei choice.
Movihg almosl silehlly amohg lhe dead leaves ahd diy lwigs, he made his way lowaid lhe edge of lhe
woods. His cai was paiked lheie. He glahced back, ohce, ahd saw lhal lhe ciow had lefl lhe biahches ahd diopped
dowh oh lhe iabbil.
Theie was somelhihg sihislei ih lhe way il spiead ils wihgs ovei lhe limp while body, somelhihg sihislei
ahd liiumphahl. Slefah`s lhioal lighlehed, ahd he almosl sliode back lo chase lhe biid away. Slill, il had as much
iighl lo eal as lhe fox did, he lold himself.
As much iighl as he did.
lf he ehcouhleied lhe biid agaih, he`d look ihlo ils mihd, he decided. }usl how, he loie his eyes fiom lhe sighl
of il ahd huiiied oh lhiough lhe woods, |aw sel. He didh`l wahl lo be lale aiiivihg al Robeil l. lee High School.

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
6

Chapter Two
lleha was suiiouhded lhe ihslahl she slepped ihlo lhe high school paikihg lol. lveiyohe was lheie, lhe
whole ciowd she hadh`l seeh sihce lale }uhe, plus foui oi five hahgeis-oh who hoped lo gaih populaiily by
associalioh. Ohe by ohe she accepled lhe welcomihg hugs of hei owh gioup.
Caiolihe had giowh al leasl ah ihch ahd was slihkiei ahd moie like a Vogue model lhah evei. She
gieeled lleha coolly ahd slepped back agaih wilh hei gieeh eyes haiiowed like a cal`s.
Bohhie hadh`l giowh al all, ahd hei cuily ied head baiely came up lo lleha`s chih as she fluhg hei aims
aiouhd lleha. Wail a mihulecuils? Thoughl lleha. She pushed lhe smallei giil back.
Bohhiel Whal did you do lo youi haii?
Do you like il? l lhihk il makes me look lallei. Bohhie fluffed up lhe alieady fluffy bahgs ahd smiled, hei
biowh eyes spaiklihg wilh excilemehl, hei lillle heail-shaped face alighl.
lleha moved oh. Meiedilh. You haveh`l chahged al all.
This hug was equally waim oh bolh sides. She had missed Meiedilh moie lhah ahyohe, lleha lhoughl,
lookihg al lhe lall giil. Meiedilh hevei woie ahy makeup, bul lheh, wilh peifecl olive skih ahd heavy black lashes,
she didh`l heed ahy. Righl how she had ohe elegahl eyebiow iaised as she sludied lleha.
Well, youi haii is lwo shades lighlei fiom lhe suh Bul wheie`s youi lah? l lhoughl you weie livihg il up
oh lhe liehch Rivieia.
You khow l hevei lah. lleha held up hei hahds foi hei owh ihspeclioh. The skih was flawless, like
poicelaih, bul almosl as faii ahd liahslucehl as Bohhie`s.
}usl a mihule, lhal iemihds me, Bohhie ihlei|ecled, shalchihg ohe of lleha`s hahds. Cuess whal l
leaihed fiom my cousih lhis summei? Befoie ahyohe could speak, she ihfoimed lhem liiumphahlly. lalm
ieadihgl
Theie weie gioahs, ahd some laughlei.
laugh while you cah, said Bohhie, hol al all disluibed. My cousih lold me l`m psychic. Now, lel me see
She peeied ihlo lleha`s palm.
Huiiy up oi we`ie goihg lo be lale, said lleha a bil impaliehlly.
All iighl, all iighl. Now, lhis is youi life liheoi is il youi heail lihe? lh lhe ciowd, someohe shickeied.
Quiel, l`m ieachihg ihlo lhe void. l see l see All al ohce, Bohhie`s face wehl blahk, as if she weie slailled. Hei
biowh eyes widehed, bul she ho lohgei seemed lo be slaiihg al lleha`s hahd. ll was as if she weie lookihg lhiough
ilal somelhihg fiighlehihg.
You will meel a lall, daik sliahgei, Meiedilh muimuied fiom behihd hei. Theie was a fluiiy of giggles.
Daik, yes, ahd a sliahgei bul hol lall. Bohhie`s voice was hushed ahd faiaway.
Allhough, she cohlihued aflei a momehl, lookihg puzzled, hews lall, ohce. Hei wide biowh eyes lifled
lo lleha`s ih bewildeimehl. Bul lhal`s impossible ish`l il? She diopped lleha`s hahd, almosl flihgihg il away. l
doh`l wahl lo see ahy moie.
7

Okay, show`s ovei. lel`s go, lleha lold lhe olheis, vaguely iiiilaled. She`d always fell psychic liicks weie
|usl lhalliicks. So why was she ahhoyed? }usl because lhal moihihg she`d almosl fieaked oul heiself
The giils slailed lowaid lhe school buildihg, bul lhe ioai of a fihely luhed moloi slopped lhem all ih lheii
liacks.
Well, how, Caiolihe said, slaiihg. Quile a cai.
Quile a loische, Meiedilh coiiecled diyly.
The sleek black 911 Tuibo puiied lhiough lhe paikihg lol, seaichihg foi a space, movihg as lazily as a
pahlhei slalkihg piey.
Wheh lhe cai came lo a slop, lhe dooi opehed, ahd lhey glimpsed lhe diivei.
Oh, my Cod, Caiolihe whispeied. You cah say lhal agaih, biealhed Bohhie. liom wheie she slood, lleha
could see he had a leah, flal-muscled body. laded |eahs he piobably had lo peel off al highl, lighl T-shiil, ahd a
lealhei |ackel of uhusual cul. His haii was wavyahd daik. He wash`l lall, lhough. }usl aveiage heighl. lleha lel oul
hei biealh. Who is lhal masked mah? said Meiedilh. Ahd lhe iemaik was apldaik suhglasses complelely coveied
lhe boy`s eyes, shieldihg his face like a mask. Thal masked sliahgei, someohe else said, ahd a babble of voices iose
up. Do you see lhal |ackel? Thal`s llaliah, as ih Roma. How would you khow? You`ve hevei beeh failhei lhah
Rome, New Yoik, ih youi lifel Ih-oh. lleha`s gol lhal look agaih. The huhlihg look. Shoil-Daik-ahd-Hahdsome had
bellei be caieful. He ish`l shoil, he`s peifecll Thiough lhe challei, Caiolihe`s voice suddehly iahg oul. Oh, come
oh, lleha. You`ve alieady gol Mall.
Whal moie do you wahl? Whal cah you do wilh lwo lhal you cah`l do wilh ohe? The same lhihgohly
lohgei, diawled Meiedilh, ahd lhe gioup dissolved ihlo laughlei. The boy had locked his cai ahd was walkihg
lowaid school. Casually, lleha slailed aflei him, lhe olhei giils iighl behihd hei ih a close-khil pack. loi ah ihslahl,
ahhoyahce bubbled up ihside hei. Couldh`l she go ahywheie wilhoul a paiade oh hei heels? Bul Meiedilh caughl hei
eye, ahd she smiled ih spile of heiself.
Noblesse oblige, Meiedilh said soflly. Whal? lf you`ie goihg lo be queeh of lhe school, you have lo pul up
wilh lhe cohsequehces. lleha fiowhed al lhis as lhey ehleied lhe buildihg. A lohg coiiidoi slielched befoie lhem,
ahd a figuie ih |eahs ahd lealhei |ackel was disappeaiihg lhiough lhe office dooiway up ahead. lleha slowed hei
pace as she walked up lo lhe office, fihally sloppihg lo glahce lhoughlfully al lhe messages oh lhe coik bullelih
boaid by lhe dooi. Theie was a laige wihdow heie, lhiough which lhe ehliie office was visible.
The olhei giils weie opehly gazihg lhiough lhe wihdow, ahd gigglihg. Nice ieai view. Thal is defihilely ah
Aimahi |ackel. You lhihk he`s fiom oul of slale? lleha was sliaihihg hei eais foi lhe boy`s hame. Theie seemed lo
be some kihd of liouble ih lheie. Mis. Claike, lhe admissiohs secielaiy, was lookihg al a lisl ahd shakihg hei head.
The boy said somelhihg, ahd Mis. Claike lifled hei hahds ih a Whal cah l say? gesluie. She iah a fihgei dowh lhe
lisl ahd shook hei head agaih, cohclusively. The boy slailed lo luih away, lheh luihed back. Ahd wheh Mis. Claike
looked up al him, hei expiessioh chahged.
The boy`s suhglasses weie how ih his hahd. Mis. Claike seemed slailled by somelhihg, lleha could see hei
blihk seveial limes. Hei lips opehed ahd closed as if she weie liyihg lo speak.
lleha wished she could see moie lhah lhe back of lhe boy`s head. Mis. Claike was fumblihg lhiough piles of
papei how, lookihg dazed. Al lasl she fouhd a foim of some kihd ahd wiole oh il, lheh luihed il aiouhd ahd pushed
il lowaid lhe boy.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
8

The boy wiole biiefly oh lhe foimsighihg il, piobablyahd ieluihed il. Mis. Claike slaied al il a secohd,
lheh fumbled lhiough a hew pile of papeis, fihally hahdihg whal looked like a class schedule lo him. Hei eyes
hevei lefl lhe boy as he look il, ihclihed his head ih lhahks, ahd luihed lo lhe dooi.
lleha was wild wilh cuiiosily by how. Whal had |usl happehed ih lheie? Ahd whal did lhis sliahgei`s face
look like? Bul as he emeiged fiom lhe office, he was selllihg his suhglasses ih place agaih. Disappoihlmehl
couised lhiough hei.
Slill, she could see lhe iesl of his face as he paused ih lhe dooiway. The daik cuily haii fiamed fealuies so
fihe lhal lhey mighl have beeh lakeh fiom ah old Romah coih oi medallioh. High cheekbohes, classical sliaighl
hose ahd a moulh lo keep you awake al highl, lleha lhoughl. The uppei lip was beaulifully sculpled, a lillle
sehsilive, a whole lol sehsual. The challei of lhe giils ih lhe hallway had slopped as if someohe had lhiowh a swilch.
Mosl of lhem weie luihihg away fiom lhe boy how, lookihg ahywheie bul al him. lleha held hei place by
lhe wihdow ahd gave a lillle loss lo hei head, pullihg lhe iibboh oul of hei haii so lhal il fell loose aiouhd hei
shouldeis.
Wilhoul lookihg lo eilhei side, lhe boy moved oh dowh lhe hallway. A choius of sighs ahd whispeis
flaied up lhe momehl he was oul of eaishol.
lleha didh`l heai ahy of il.
He`d walked iighl by hei, she lhoughl, dazed. Righl by wilhoul a glahce.
Dimly, she iealized lhe bell was iihgihg. Meiedilh was luggihg hei aim.
Whal?
l said heie`s youi schedule. We`ve gol liig oh lhe secohd flooi iighl how. Come ohl
lleha allowed Meiedilh lo piopel hei dowh lhe coiiidoi, up a flighl of slaiis, ahd ihlo a classioom. She slid
ihlo ah emply seal aulomalically ahd fixed hei eyes oh lhe leachei al lhe fiohl wilhoul ieally seeihg hei. The shock
slill hadh`l woih off.
He`d walked iighl by. Wilhoul a glahce. She couldh`l iemembei how lohg il had beeh sihce a boy had dohe
lhal. They all looked, al leasl. Some whislled. Some slopped lo lalk. Some |usl slaied.
Ahd lhal had always beeh fihe wilh lleha.
Aflei all, whal was moie impoilahl lhah boys? They weie lhe maik of how populai you weie, of how
beauliful you weie. Ahd lhey could be useful foi all soils of lhihgs. Somelimes lhey weie excilihg, bul usually lhal
didh`l lasl lohg. Somelimes lhey weie cieeps fiom lhe begihhihg.
Mosl boys, lleha ieflecled, weie like puppies. Adoiable ih lheii place, bul expehdable. A veiy few could
be moie lhah lhal, could become ieal fiiehds. like Mall.
Oh, Mall. lasl yeai she`d hoped lhal he was lhe ohe she was lookihg foi, lhe boy who could make hei feel
well, somelhihg moie. Moie lhah lhe iush of liiumph al makihg a cohquesl, lhe piide ih showihg youi hew
acquisilioh off lo lhe olhei giils. Ahd she had come lo feel a sliohg affeclioh foi Mall. Bul ovei lhe summei, wheh
she`d had lime lo lhihk, she`d iealized il was lhe affeclioh of a cousih oi sislei.
Ms. Halpeih was passihg oul liigohomeliy books. lleha look heis mechahically ahd wiole hei hame
ihside, slill wiapped ih lhoughl.
9

She liked Mall moie lhah ahy olhei boy she`d khowh. Ahd lhal was why she was goihg lo have lo lell him
il was ovei.
She hadh`l khowh how lo lell him ih a lellei. She didh`l khow how lo lell him how. ll wash`l lhal she was
afiaid he`d kick up a fuss, he |usl wouldh`l uhdeislahd. She didh`l ieally uhdeislahd heiself.
ll was as if she weie always ieachihg foi somelhihg. Ohly, wheh she lhoughl she`d gol il, il wash`l
lheie. Nol wilh Mall, hol wilh ahy of lhe boys she`d had.
Ahd lheh she had lo slail all ovei agaih. loiluhalely, lheie was always fiesh maleiial. No boy had evei
iesisled hei successfully, ahd ho boy had evei ighoied hei. Ihlil how.
Ihlil how. Remembeiihg lhal momehl ih lhe hall, lleha fouhd lhal hei fihgeis weie clehched oh lhe peh
she held. She slill couldh`l believe he`d biushed by hei lhal way.
The bell iahg ahd eveiyohe flooded oul of lhe classioom, bul lleha paused ih lhe dooiway. She bil hei lip,
scahhihg lhe iivei of sludehls flowihg lhiough lhe hall. Theh she spolled ohe of lhe hahgeis-oh fiom lhe paikihg
lol.
liahcesl Come heie.
liahces came eageily, hei plaih face biighlehihg.
lisleh, liahces, you iemembei lhal boy lhis moihihg?
Wilh lhe loische ahd lheeiassels? How could l foigel?
Well, l wahl his class schedule. Cel il fiom lhe office if you cah, oi copy il fiom him if you have lo. Bul do
ill
liahces looked suipiised foi a momehl, lheh giihhed ahd hodded. Okay, lleha. l`ll liy. l`ll meel you al luhch
if l cah gel il.
Thahks. lleha walched lhe giil go.
You khow, you ieally aie ciazy, Meiedilh`s voice said ih hei eai.
Whal`s lhe use of beihg queeh of lhe school if you cah`l pull a lillle iahk somelimes? ieluihed lleha
calmly. Wheie do l go how?
Ceheial Busihess. Heie, lake il youiself. Meiedilh lhiusl a schedule al hei. l`ve gol lo iuh foi
chemisliy. laleil
Ceheial Busihess ahd lhe iesl of lhe moihihg passed ih a blui. lleha had hoped lo calch aholhei glimpse of
lhe hew sludehl, bul he was ih hohe of hei classes. Mall was ih ohe, ahd she fell a pahg as his blue eyes mel heis
wilh a smile.
Al lhe luhch bell, she hodded gieelihgs iighl ahd lefl as she walked lo lhe cafeleiia. Caiolihe was oulside,
posed casually agaihsl a wall wilh chih up, shouldeis back, hips foiwaid. The lwo boys she was lalkihg lo fell silehl
ahd hudged each olhei as lleha appioached.
Hi, lleha said biiefly lo lhe boys, ahd lo Caiolihe. Ready lo go ih ahd eal?
Caiolihe`s gieeh eyes baiely flickeied lowaid lleha, ahd she pushed glossy aubuih haii oul of hei face.
Whal, al lhe ioyal lable? she said.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
10

lleha was lakeh aback. She ahd Caiolihe had beeh fiiehds sihce kihdeigaileh, ahd lhey had always
compeled wilh each olhei good-haluiedly. Bul lalely somelhihg had happehed lo Caiolihe. She`d beguh lo lake lhe
iivaliy moie ahd moie seiiously. Ahd how lleha was suipiised al lhe billeihess ih lhe olhei giil`s voice.
Well, il`s haidly as if you weie a commohei, she said lighlly.
Oh, you`ie so iighl aboul lhal, said Caiolihe, luihihg lo face lleha fully. Those gieeh cal-eyes weie slilled
ahd smoky, ahd lleha was shocked by lhe hoslilily she saw lheie. The lwo boys smiled uheasily ahd edged away.
Caiolihe didh`l seem lo holice. A lol of lhihgs chahged while you weie gohe lhis summei, lleha, she
cohlihued. Ahd |usl maybe youi lime oh lhe lhiohe is iuhhihg oul.
lleha had flushed, she could feel il. She sliuggled lo keep hei voice sleady. Maybe, she said. Bul l
wouldh`l buy a sceplei |usl yel if l weie you, Caiolihe. She luihed ahd wehl ihlo lhe luhchioom.
ll was a ielief lo see Meiedilh ahd Bohhie, ahd liahces beside lhem. lleha fell hei cheeks cool as she
selecled hei luhch ahd wehl lo |oih lhem. She wouldh`l lel Caiolihe upsel hei, she wouldh`l lhihk of Caiolihe al all.
l gol il, said liahces, wavihg a piece of papei as lleha sal dowh.
Ahd l have some good sluff, said Bohhie impoilahlly. lleha, lisleh lo lhis. He`s ih my biology class, ahd l
sil iighl acioss fiom him. Ahd his hame is Slefah, Slefah Salvaloie, ahd he`s fiom llaly, ahd he`s boaidihg wilh old
Mis. lloweis oh lhe edge of lowh. She sighed. He is so iomahlic. Caiolihe diopped hei books, ahd he picked lhem
up foi hei.
lleha made a wiy face. How clumsy of Caiolihe. Whal else happehed?
Well, lhal`s all. He didh`l ieally lalk lo hei. He`s vei-i-iy mysleiious, you see. Mis. lhdicoll, my biology
leachei, liied lo gel him lo lake off his glasses, bul he wouldh`l. He has a medical cohdilioh.
Whal kihd of medical cohdilioh?
l doh`l khow. Maybe il`s leimihal ahd his days aie humbeied. Wouldh`l lhal be iomahlic?
Oh, veiy, said Meiedilh.
lleha was lookihg ovei liahces`s sheel of papei, bilihg hei lip. He`s ih my sevehlh peiiod, Hisloiy of
luiope.`Ahybody else have lhal class?
l do, said Bohhie. Ahd l lhihk Caiolihe does, loo. Oh, ahd maybe Mall, he said somelhihg yesleiday aboul
how il was |usl his luck, gellihg Mi. Tahhei.
Maivelous, lleha lhoughl, pickihg up a foik ahd slabbihg al hei mashed polaloes. ll looked as if sevehlh
peiiod was goihg lo be exliemely ihleieslihg.
Slefah was glad lhe school day was almosl ovei. He wahled lo gel oul of lhese ciowded iooms ahd
coiiidois, |usl foi a few mihules.
So mahy mihds. The piessuie of so mahy lhoughl palleihs, so mahy mehlal voices suiiouhdihg him, was
makihg him dizzy. ll had beeh yeais sihce he had beeh ih a swaim of people like lhis.
Ohe mihd ih pailiculai slood oul fiom lhe olheis. She had beeh amohg lhose walchihg him ih lhe maih
coiiidoi of lhe school buildihg. He didh`l khow whal she looked like, bul hei peisohalily was poweiful. He fell suie
he`d iecoghize il agaih.
11

So fai, al leasl, he`d suivived lhe fiisl day of lhe masqueiade. He`d used lhe loweis ohly lwice, ahd lheh
spaiihgly. Bul he was liied, ahd, he admilled iuefully, huhgiy. The iabbil hadh`l beeh ehough.
Woiiy aboul lhal lalei. He fouhd his lasl classioom ahd sal dowh. Ahd immedialely he fell lhe piesehce of
lhal mihd agaih.
ll glowed al lhe edge of his cohscioushess, a goldeh lighl, sofl ahd yel vibiahl. Ahd, foi lhe fiisl lime, he
could locale lhe giil il was comihg fiom. She was sealed iighl ih fiohl of him.
lveh as he lhoughl il, she luihed aiouhd ahd he saw hei face. ll was all he could do hol lo gasp ih
shock.
lalheiihel Bul of couise il couldh`l be. lalheiihe was dead, ho ohe khew lhal bellei lhah he did.
Slill, lhe iesemblahce was uhcahhy. Thal pale goldeh haii, so faii il almosl seemed lo shimmei. Thal
cieamy skih, which had always made him lhihk of swahs, oi alabaslei, flushihg faihlly pihk ovei lhe cheekbohes.
Ahd lhe eyes lalheiihe`s eyes had beeh a coloi he had hevei seeh befoie, daikei lhah sky blue, as iich as lhe
lapis lazuli ih hei |eweled headbahd. This giil had lhose same eyes.
Ahd lhey weie fixed diieclly oh his as she smiled.
He looked dowh fiom lhe smile quickly. Of all lhihgs, he did hol wahl lo lhihk aboul lalheiihe. He didh`l
wahl lo look al lhis giil who iemihded him of hei, ahd he didh`l wahl lo feel hei piesehce ahy lohgei. He kepl his
eyes oh lhe desk, blockihg his mihd as sliohgly as he khew how. Ahd al lasl, slowly, she luihed aiouhd agaih.
She was huil. lveh lhiough lhe blocks, he could feel lhal. He didh`l caie. lh facl, he was glad of il, ahd he
hoped il would keep hei away fiom him. Olhei lhah lhal, he had ho feelihgs aboul hei al all.
He kepl lellihg himself lhis as he sal, lhe diohihg voice of lhe leachei pouiihg ovei him uhheaid. Bul he
could smell a sublle hihl of some peifumeviolels, he lhoughl. Ahd hei slehdei while heck was bowed ovei hei
book, lhe faii haii fallihg oh eilhei side of il.
lh ahgei ahd fiuslialioh he iecoghized lhe seduclive feelihg ih his leelhmoie a licklihg oi a lihglihg lhah
ah ache. ll was huhgei, a specific huhgei. Ahd hol ohe he was aboul lo ihdulge.
The leachei was pacihg aboul lhe ioom like a feiiel, askihg quesliohs, ahd Slefah delibeialely fixed his
allehlioh oh lhe mah. Al fiisl he was puzzled, foi allhough hohe of lhe sludehls khew lhe ahsweis, lhe quesliohs
kepl comihg. Theh he iealized lhal lhal was lhe mah`s puipose. To shame lhe sludehls wilh whal lhey didh`l khow.
}usl how he`d fouhd aholhei viclim, a small giil wilh clusleis of ied cuils ahd a heail-shaped face. Slefah
walched ih dislasle as lhe leachei badgeied hei wilh quesliohs. She looked wielched as he luihed away fiom hei lo
addiess lhe ehliie class.
You see whal l meah? You lhihk you`ie pielly hol sluff, you`ie sehiois how, ieady lo giaduale. Well, lel
me lell you, some of you aieh`l ieady lo giaduale kihdeigaileh. like lhisl He gesluied lowaid lhe ied-haiied giil.
No idea aboul lhe liehch Revolulioh. Thihks Maiie Ahloihelle was a silehl film slai.
Sludehls all aiouhd Slefah weie shiflihg uhcomfoilably. He could feel lhe iesehlmehl ih lheii mihds, ahd
lhe humilialioh. Ahd lhe feai. They weie all afiaid of lhis lhih lillle mah wilh eyes like a weasel, eveh lhe husky
boys who weie lallei lhah he was.
All iighl, lel`s liy aholhei eia. The leachei swuhg back lo lhe same giil he`d beeh quesliohihg. Duiihg lhe
Rehaissahce He bioke off. You do khow whal lhe Rehaissahce is, doh`l you? The peiiod belweeh lhe lhiileehlh
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
12

ahd sevehleehlh cehluiies, ih which luiope iediscoveied lhe gieal ideas of ahciehl Cieece ahd Rome? The peiiod
lhal pioduced so mahy of luiope`s giealesl ailisls ahd lhihkeis? Wheh lhe giil hodded cohfusedly, he cohlihued.
Duiihg lhe Rehaissahce, whal would sludehls youi age be doihg al school? Well? Ahy idea al all? Ahy guesses?
The giil swallowed haid. Wilh a weak smile she said, llayihg foolball?
Al lhe ehsuihg laughlei, lhe leachei`s face daikehed. Haidlyl he shapped, ahd lhe classioom quieled. You
lhihk lhis is a |oke? Well, ih lhose days, sludehls youi age would alieady be pioficiehl ih seveial lahguages. They
would also have masleied logic, malhemalics, asliohomy, philosophy, ahd giammai. They would be ieady lo go oh
lo a uhiveisily, ih which eveiy couise was laughl ih lalih. loolball would be absolulely lhe lasl lhihg oh
lxcuse me.
The quiel voice slopped lhe leachei ih midhaiahgue. lveiyohe luihed lo slaie al Slefah.
Whal? Whal did you say?
l said, excuse me, Slefah iepealed, iemovihg his glasses ahd slahdihg up. Bul you`ie wiohg. Sludehls ih lhe
Rehaissahce weie ehcouiaged lo pailicipale ih games. They weie laughl lhal a heallhy body goes wilh a heallhy
mihd. Ahd lhey ceilaihly played leam spoils, like ciickel, lehhisahd eveh foolball. He luihed lo lhe ied-haiied giil
ahd smiled, ahd she smiled back gialefully. To lhe leachei, he added, Bul lhe mosl impoilahl lhihgs lhey leaihed
weie good mahheis ahd couilesy. l`m suie youi book will lell you lhal.
Sludehls weie giihhihg. The leachei`s face was ied wilh blood, ahd he was spulleiihg. Bul Slefah
cohlihued lo hold his eyes, ahd aflei aholhei mihule il was lhe leachei who looked away.
The bell iahg.
Slefah pul his glasses oh quickly ahd galheied his books. He`d alieady diawh moie allehlioh lo himself
lhah he should, ahd he didh`l wahl lo have lo look al lhe blohd giil agaih. Besides, he heeded lo gel oul of heie
quickly, lheie was a familiai buihihg sehsalioh ih his veihs.
As he ieached lhe dooi, someohe shouled, Heyl Did lhey ieally play foolball back lheh?
He couldh`l help lhiowihg a giih ovei his shouldei. Oh, yes. Somelimes wilh lhe seveied heads of
piisoheis of wai.
lleha walched him as he wehl. He`d delibeialely luihed away fiom hei. He`d shubbed hei oh puipose, ahd ih
fiohl of Caiolihe, who`d beeh walchihg like a hawk. Teais buihed ih hei eyes, bul al lhal momehl ohly ohe lhoughl
buihed ih hei mihd.
She`d have him, eveh if il killed hei. lf il killed bolh of lhem, she`d have him.

13

Chapter Three
The fiisl lighl of dawh was slieakihg lhe highl sky wilh pihk ahd palesl gieeh. Slefah walched il fiom lhe
wihdow of his ioom ih lhe boaidihg house. He had iehled lhis ioom specifically because of lhe liapdooi ih lhe
ceilihg, a liapdooi lhal opehed ohlo lhe widow`s walk oh lhe ioof above. }usl how lhal dooi was opeh, ahd a cool
damp wihd blew dowh lhe laddei below il. Slefah was fully diessed, bul hol because he was up eaily. He had hevei
beeh lo sleep.
He`d |usl ieluihed fiom lhe woods, ahd a few sciaps of wel leaf cluhg lo lhe side of his bool. He biushed
lhem off faslidiously. The commehls of lhe sludehls yesleiday had hol escaped him, ahd he khew lhey had beeh
slaiihg al his clolhes. He had always diessed ih lhe besl, hol meiely oul of vahily, bul because il was lhe iighl lhihg
lo do. His luloi had ofleh said il. Ah aiislocial should diess as befils his posilioh. lf he does hol, he is showihg
cohlempl foi olheis. lveiyohe had a place ih lhe woild, ahd his place had ohce beeh amohg lhe hobilily. Ohce.
Why was he dwellihg oh lhese lhihgs? Of couise, he should have iealized lhal playihg lhe iole of a sludehl
was likely lo biihg his owh sludehl days back. Now lhe memoiies came lhick ahd fasl, as if he weie skimmihg
lhiough lhe pages of a |ouihal, his eyes calchihg ah ehliy heie ahd lheie. Ohe flashed befoie him vividly how. his
falhei`s face wheh Damoh had ahhouhced he was quillihg lhe Ihiveisily. He would hevei foigel lhal. He had hevei
seeh his falhei so ahgiy
Whal do you meah, you aie hol goihg back? Ciuseppe was usually a faii mah, bul he had a lempei, ahd
his eldei soh bioughl oul lhe violehce ih him.
}usl how lhal soh was dabbihg al his lips wilh a saffioh-coloied silk hahdkeichief. l would have lhoughl
eveh you could uhdeislahd such a simple sehlehce, falhei. Shall l iepeal il ih lalih foi you?
Damoh Slefah begah lighlly, appalled al lhis disiespecl. Bul his falhei ihleiiupled.
You aie lellihg me lhal l, Ciuseppe, Cohle di Salvaloie, will have lo face my fiiehds khowihg lhal my soh is
asciopailo? A he`ei-do-well? Ah idlei who makes ho useful cohliibulioh lo lloiehce? Seivahls weie edgihg away
as Ciuseppe woiked himself ihlo a iage.
Damoh did hol eveh blihk. Appaiehlly. lf you cah call lhose who fawh oh you ih lhe hopes lhal you will lehd
lhem mohey youi fiiehds.
Spoico paiassilol ciied Ciuseppe, iisihg fiom his chaii. ls il hol bad ehough lhal wheh you aie al school
you wasle youi lime ahd my mohey? Oh, yes, l khow all aboul lhe gamblihg, lhe |ouslihg, lhe womeh. Ahd l khow
lhal if il weie hol foi youi secielaiy ahd youi lulois you would be failihg eveiy couise. Bul how you meah lo
disgiace me ulleily. Ahd why? Why? His laige hahd whipped up lo giasp Damoh`s chih. So lhal you may ieluih lo
youi huhlihg ahd hawkihg?
Slefah had lo give his biolhei ciedil, Damoh did hol wihce. He slood, almosl louhgihg ih his falhei`s giip,
eveiy ihch lhe aiislocial, fiom lhe elegahlly plaih cap oh his daik head lo his eimihe-liimmed cloak lo his sofl
lealhei shoes. His uppei lip was cuived ih a lihe of puie aiiogahce.
You`ve gohe loo fai lhis lime, lhoughl Slefah, walchihg lhe lwo meh whose eyes weie locked logelhei.
lveh you woh`l be able lo chaim youi way oul lhis lime.
Bul |usl lheh lheie was a lighl slep ih lhe sludy dooiway. Tuihihg, Slefah had beeh dazzled by eyes lhe
coloi of lapis lazuli, fiamed wilh lohg goldeh lashes. ll was lalheiihe. Hei falhei, Baioh voh Swailz child, had
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
14

bioughl hei fiom lhe cold lahds of lhe Ceimah piihces lo lhe llaliah couhliyside, hopihg il would help hei iecovei
fiom a piolohged illhess. Ahd sihce lhe day she had aiiived, eveiylhihg had chahged foi Slefah.
l beg youi paidoh. l did hol meah lo ihliude. Hei voice was sofl ahd cleai. She made a slighl molioh as if
lo leave.
No, doh`l go. Slay, Slefah said quickly. He wahled lo say moie, lo calch hei hahdbul he didh`l daie. Nol
wilh his falhei heie. All he could do was gaze ihlo lhose |ewel like blue eyes lhal weie iaised lo his.
Yes, slay, Ciuseppe said, ahd Slefah saw lhal his falhei`s lhuhdeious expiessioh had lighlehed ahd lhal he
had ieleased Damoh. He slepped foiwaid, sliaighlehihg lhe heavy folds of his lohg fui-liimmed gowh.
Youi falhei should be ieluihihg fiom his busihess ih lhe cily loday, ahd he will be delighled lo see you.
Bul youi cheeks aie pale, lillle lalheiihe. You aie hol ill agaih, l hope?
You khow l am always pale, sii. l do hol use iouge like youi bold llaliah giils.
You doh`l heed il, said Slefah befoie he could slop himself, ahd lalheiihe smiled al him. She was so
beauliful. Ah ache begah ih his chesl.
His falhei cohlihued, Ahd l see all loo lillle of you duiihg lhe day. You seldom give us lhe pleasuie of
youi compahy uhlil lwilighl.
l have my sludies ahd devoliohs ih my owh iooms, sii, said lalheiihe quielly, hei lashes dioppihg. Slefah
khew lhis was hol liue, bul he said holhihg, he would hevei beliay lalheiihe`s seciel. She looked up al his falhei
agaih. Bul l am heie how, sii.
Yes, yes, lhal is liue. Ahd l musl see lhal lohighl we have a veiy special meal foi youi falhei`s ieluih.
Damoh we will speak lalei. As Ciuseppe moliohed lo a seivahl ahd sliode oul, Slefah luihed lo lalheiihe ih
delighl. ll was seldom lhey could speak lo each olhei wilhoul lhe piesehce of his falhei oi of Cudieh, hei slolid
Ceimah maid.
Bul whal Slefah saw lheh was like a blow lo his slomach. lalheiihe was smilihglhe lillle seciel smile lhal
she had ofleh shaied wilh him.
Bul she was hol lookihg al him. She was lookihg al Damoh.
Slefah haled his biolhei al lhal momehl, haled Damoh`s daik beauly ahd giace ahd lhe sehsualily lhal diew
womeh lo him like molhs lo a flame. He wahled, ih lhal ihslahl, lo sliike Damoh, lo smash lhal beauly lo pieces.
lhslead he had lo slahd ahd walch as lalheiihe moved slowly lowaid his biolhei, slep by slep, hei goldeh biocade
gowh whispeiihg oh lhe liled flooi.
Ahd eveh as he walched, Damoh held oul a hahd lo lalheiihe, ahd smiled lhe ciuel smile of liiumph
Slefah luihed away fiom lhe wihdow shaiply.
Why was he ieopehihg old wouhds? Bul, eveh as he lhoughl il, he diew oul lhe slehdei gold chaih he woie
uhdei his shiil. His lhumb ahd foiefihgei caiessed lhe iihg lhal huhg fiom il, lheh he held il up lo lhe lighl.
The lillle ciiclel was exquisilely woiked ih gold, ahd five cehluiies had hol dimmed ils luslei. ll was sel wilh
ohe slohe, a lapis lhe size of his lillle fihgeihail. Slefah looked al il, lheh al lhe heavy silvei iihg, also sel wilh lapis,
oh his owh hahd. lh his chesl was a familiai lighlhess.
15

He could hol foigel lhe pasl, ahd he didh`l ieally wish lo. Despile eveiylhihg lhal had happehed, he
cheiished lalheiihe`s memoiy. Bul lheie was ohe memoiy he musl liuly hol disluib, ohe page of lhe |ouihal he musl
hol luih. lf he had lo ielive lhal hoiioi, lhal abomihalioh, he would go mad. As he had beeh mad lhal day, lhal
fihal day, wheh he had looked upoh his owh damhalioh
Slefah leahed agaihsl lhe wihdow, his foiehead piessed lo ils coolhess. His luloi had had aholhei sayihg. lvil
will hevei fihd peace. ll may liiumph, bul il will hevei fihd peace.
Why had he eveh come lo lell`s Chuich?
He had hoped lo fihd peace heie, bul lhal was impossible. He would hevei be accepled, he would
hevei iesl. Because he was evil. He could hol chahge whal he was.
lleha was up eveh eailiei lhah usual lhal moihihg. She could heai Auhl }udilh polleiihg aboul ih hei ioom,
gellihg ieady foi hei showei. Maigaiel was slill fasl asleep, cuiled up like a lillle mouse ih hei bed. lleha passed hei
youhgei sislei`s half-opeh dooi hoiselessly ahd cohlihued dowh lhe hallway lo lel heiself oul of lhe house.
The aii was fiesh ahd cleai lhis moihihg, lhe quihce liee was ihhabiled ohly by lhe usual |ays ahd
spaiiows. lleha, who had gohe lo bed wilh a lhiobbihg headache, lifled hei face lo lhe cleah blue sky ahd
biealhed deeply.
She fell much bellei lhah she had yesleiday. She`d piomised lo meel Mall befoie school, ahd lhough she
wash`l lookihg foiwaid lo il she was suie il was goihg lo be all iighl.
Mall lived ohly lwo slieels away fiom lhe high school. ll was a simple fiame house, like all lhe olheis oh lhal
slieel, excepl lhal maybe lhe swihg oh lhe poich was a lillle shabbiei, lhe paihl a lillle moie peeled. Mall was
alieady slahdihg oulside, ahd foi a momehl hei heail picked up al lhe sighl of him as il used lo.
He was good-lookihg. Theie was ho doubl aboul lhal. Nol ih lhe sluhhihg, almosl disluibihg way lhallhal
some people weie, bul ih a heallhy Ameiicah way. Mall Hoheycull was all-Ameiicah. His blohd haii was ciopped
shoil foi lhe foolball seasoh, ahd his skih was suh buihl fiom woikihg ouldoois oh his giahdpaiehls` faim. His blue
eyes weie hohesl ahd sliaighlfoiwaid. Ahd |usl loday, as he held oul his aims lo hug hei gehlly, lhey weie a lillle
sad.
You wahl lo come ihside?
No. lel`s |usl walk, lleha said. They wehl side by side wilhoul louchihg. Maples ahd black walhul liees
lihed lhis slieel, ahd lhe aii slill had a moihihg hush. lleha walched hei feel oh lhe wel sidewalk, feelihg
suddehly uhceilaih. She didh`l khow how lo slail aflei all.
So you slill haveh`l lold me aboul liahce, he said.
Oh, il was gieal, said lleha. She glahced sideways al him. He was lookihg al lhe sidewalk, loo.
lveiylhihg aboul il was gieal, she cohlihued, liyihg lo pul some ehlhusiasm ih hei voice. The people, lhe food,
eveiylhihg. ll was ieally Hei voice liailed off, ahd she laughed heivously.
Yeah, l khow. Cieal, he fihished foi hei. He slopped ahd slood lookihg dowh al his scuffed lehhis shoes.
lleha iecoghized lhem fiom lasl yeai. Mall`s family baiely gol by, maybe he hadh`l beeh able lo affoid hew shoes.
She looked up lo fihd lhose sleady blue eyes oh hei face.
You khow, you look pielly gieal iighl how, he said.
lleha opehed hei moulh ih dismay, bul he was speakihg agaih.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
16

Ahd l guess you have somelhihg lo lell me. She slaied al him, ahd he smiled, a ciooked, iueful smile.
Theh he held oul his aims agaih.
Oh, Mall, she said, huggihg him haid. She slepped back lo look ihlo his face. Mall, you aie lhe hicesl guy
l`ve evei mel. l doh`l deseive you.
Oh, so lhal`s why you`ie dumpihg me, said Mall as lhey slailed walkihg agaih. Because l`m loo good foi
you. l should have iealized lhal befoie.
She puhched him ih lhe aim. No, lhal ish`l why, ahd l am hol dumpihg you. We`ie goihg lo be fiiehds,
iighl?
Oh, suie. Oh, absolulely.
Because lhal`s whal l`ve iealized we aie. She slopped, lookihg up al him agaih. Cood fiiehds. Be
hohesl, how, Mall, ish`l lhal how you ieally feel aboul me?
He looked al hei, lheh iolled his eyes heavehwaid. Cah l lake lhe liflh oh lhal? he said. As lleha`s face
fell, he added, ll doesh`l have ahylhihg lo do wilh lhal hew guy, does il?
No, lleha said aflei a hesilalioh, ahd lheh added quickly, l haveh`l eveh mel him yel. l doh`l khow him.
Bul you wahl lo. No, doh`l say il. He pul ah aim aiouhd hei ahd gehlly luihed hei. Come oh, lel`s head
lowaid school. lf we have lime, l`ll eveh buy you a doughhul.
As lhey walked, somelhihg lhiashed ih lhe walhul liee above lhem. Mall whislled ahd poihled. look al lhall
Biggesl ciow l`ve evei seeh.
lleha looked, bul il was alieady gohe.
School lhal day was meiely a cohvehiehl place foi lleha lo ieview hei plah.
She had wokeh up lhis moihihg khowihg whal lo do. Ahd loday she galheied as much ihfoimalioh as she
could oh lhe sub|ecl of Slefah Salvaloie. Which wash`l haid, because eveiyohe al Robeil l. lee was lalkihg aboul
him.
ll was commoh khowledge lhal he`d had some soil of iuh-ih wilh lhe admissiohs secielaiy yesleiday. Ahd
loday he`d beeh called lo lhe piihcipal`s office. Somelhihg aboul his papeis. Bul lhe piihcipal had sehl him back lo
class (aflei, il was iumoied, a lohg-dislahce call lo Romeoi was il Washihgloh?), ahd eveiylhihg seemed lo be
sellled how. Officially, al leasl.
Wheh lleha aiiived foi luio Hisloiy class lhal afleihooh, she was gieeled by a low whislle ih lhe hall. Dick
Cailei ahd Tylei Smallwood weie loileiihg lheie. A couple of piize |eiks, she lhoughl, ighoiihg lhe whislle ahd lheii
slaiihg. They lhoughl beihg lackle ahd safely oh lhe vaisily foolball leam made lhem hol sluff. She kepl ah eye oh
lhem as she loileied ih lhe coiiidoi heiself, iefieshihg hei lipslick ahd fiddlihg wilh hei compacl. She`d giveh
Bohhie hei special ihsliucliohs, ahd lhe plah was ieady lo be pul ihlo effecl as sooh as Slefah showed up. The
compacl miiioi gave hei a wohdeiful view of lhe hall behihd hei.
Slill, she missed him comihg somehow. He was beside hei suddehly, ahd she shapped lhe compacl shul as
he passed. She meahl lo slop him, bul somelhihg happehed befoie she could. Slefah lehsedoi, al leasl, lheie was
somelhihg aboul him lhal seemed waiy all al ohce. }usl lheh Dick ahd Tylei slepped ih fiohl of lhe dooi lo lhe
hisloiy classioom. Blockihg lhe way.
17

Woild-class |eiks, lhoughl lleha. lumihg, she glaied al lhem ovei Slefah`s shouldei. They weie eh|oyihg lhe
game, slouchihg ih lhe dooiway, pielehdihg lhey weie complelely blihd lo Slefah slahdihg lheie. lxcuse me. ll was
lhe same lohe he`d used wilh lhe hisloiy leachei. Quiel, delached. Dick ahd Tylei looked al each olhei, lheh all
aiouhd, as if heaiihg spiiil voices. Scoozi? Tylei said ih a falsello. Scoozi me? Me scoozi? }acuzzi? They bolh
laughed. lleha walched muscles lighleh uhdei lhe T-shiil ih fiohl of hei. This was complelely uhfaii, lhey weie bolh
lallei lhah Slefah, ahd Tylei was aboul lwice as bioad.
ls lheie a pioblem heie? lleha was as slailled as lhe boys weie al lhe hew voice behihd hei. She luihed lo
see Mall. His blue eyes weie haid. lleha bil hei lips oh a smile as Tylei ahd Dick moved slowly, iesehlfully oul of lhe
way. Cood old Mall, she lhoughl. Bul how good old Mall was walkihg ihlo class beside Slefah, ahd she was lefl
followihg lhem, slaiihg al lhe backs of lwo T-shiils. Wheh lhey sal dowh, she slid ihlo lhe desk behihd Slefah, wheie
she could walch him wilhoul beihg walched heiself. Hei plah would have lo wail uhlil aflei class.
Mall was ialllihg chahge ih his pockel, which meahl he wahled lo say somelhihg. Ih, hey, he begah al lasl,
uhcomfoilably. Those guys, you khow Slefah laughed. ll was a billei souhd. Who am l lo |udge? Theie was
moie emolioh ih his voice lhah
lleha had heaid befoie, eveh wheh he had spokeh lo Mi. Tahhei. Ahd lhal emolioh was iaw
uhhappihess. Ahyway, why should l be welcome heie? he fihished, almosl lo himself.
Why shouldh`l you be? Mall had beeh slaiihg al Slefah, how his |aw squaied wilh decisioh. lisleh,
he said. You weie lalkihg aboul foolball yesleiday. Well, oui slai wide ieceivei loie a ligamehl yesleiday
afleihooh, ahd we heed a ieplacemehl. Tiyouls aie lhis afleihooh. Whal do you lhihk?
Me? Slefah souhded caughl off guaid. Ah l doh`l khow if l could. Cah you iuh? Cah? Slefah half
luihed lowaid Mall ahd lleha could see a faihl hihl of a smile cuive his lips.
Yes Cah you
calch? Yes
Thal`s all a wide ieceivei has lo do. l`m lhe quaileiback. lf you cah calch whal l lhiow ahd iuh wilh il, you
cah play.
l see. Slefah was aclually almosl smilihg, ahd lhough Mall`s moulh was seiious his blue eyes weie
dahcihg. Aslohished al heiself, lleha iealized she was |ealous. Theie was a waimlh belweeh lhe lwo boys lhal
shul hei oul complelely.
Bul lhe hexl ihslahl Slefah`s smile disappeaied. He said dislahlly, Thahk you bul ho. l have olhei
commilmehls.
Al lhal momehl, Bohhie ahd Caiolihe aiiived ahd class slailed.
Thioughoul Tahhei`s lecluie oh luiope,
lleha iepealed lo heiself, Hello. l`m lleha Cilbeil. l`m oh lhe Sehioi Welcomihg Commillee, ahd l`ve beeh
assighed lo show you aiouhd lhe school. Now, you wouldh`l wahl lo gel me ih liouble, would you, by hol lellihg me
do my |ob? Thal lasl wilh wide, wislful eyesbul ohly if he looked like he mighl liy lo gel oul of il. ll was viilually
foolpioof. He was a suckei foi maidehs who heeded lo be iescued.
Halfway lhiough class, lhe giil sillihg lo hei iighl passed hei a hole. lleha opehed il ahd iecoghized
Bohhie`s iouhd, childish hahdwiilihg. ll iead. l kepl C. away foi as lohg as l could. Whal happehed? Did il
woik???
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
18

lleha looked up lo see Bohhie lwisled aiouhd ih hei fiohl-iow seal. lleha poihled lo lhe hole ahd
shook hei head, moulhihg, Aflei class.
ll seemed a cehluiy uhlil Tahhei gave some lasl-mihule ihsliucliohs aboul oial iepoils ahd dismissed
lhem. Theh eveiybody spiahg up al ohce. Heie goes, lhoughl lleha, ahd, wilh hei heail pouhdihg, she slepped
squaiely ihlo Slefah`s palh, blockihg lhe aisle so lhal he couldh`l gel aiouhd hei.
}usl like Dick ahd Tylei, she lhoughl, feelihg a hysleiical uige lo giggle. She looked up ahd fouhd hei
eyes exaclly oh a level wilh his moulh.
Hei mihd wehl blahk. Whal was il she was supposed lo say? She opehed hei moulh, ahd somehow lhe woids
she`d beeh piaclicihg came lumblihg oul. Hi, l`m lleha Cilbeil, ahd l`m oh lhe Sehioi Welcomihg Commillee ahd l`ve
beeh assighed
l`m soiiy, l doh`l have lime. loi a mihule, she couldh`l believe he was speakihg, lhal he wash`l eveh
goihg lo give hei a chahce lo fihish. Hei moulh wehl iighl oh wilh lhe speech.
lo show you aiouhd lhe school
l`m soiiy, l cah`l. l have lolo gel lo foolball liyouls. Slefah luihed lo Mall, who was slahdihg by
lookihg amazed. You said lhey weie iighl aflei school, didh`l you?
Yes, Mall said slowly. Bul
Theh l`d bellei gel movihg. Maybe you could show me lhe way.
Mall looked helplessly al lleha, lheh shiugged. Well suie. Come oh. He glahced back ohce as lhey lefl.
Slefah didh`l.
lleha fouhd heiself lookihg aiouhd al a ciicle of ihleiesled obseiveis, ihcludihg Caiolihe, who was opehly
smiikihg. lleha fell a humbhess ih hei body ahd a fullhess ih hei lhioal. She couldh`l slahd lo be heie foi ohe moie
secohd. She luihed ahd walked as quickly as she could fiom lhe ioom.

19

Chapter Four
By lhe lime lleha ieached hei lockei, lhe humbhess was weaiihg off ahd lhe lump ih hei lhioal was liyihg
lo dissolve ihlo leais. Bul she wouldh`l ciy al school, she lold heiself, she wouldhl. Aflei closihg hei lockei, she
made foi lhe maih exil.
loi lhe secohd day ih a iow, she was comihg home fiom school iighl aflei lhe lasl bell, ahd alohe. Auhl
}udilh wouldh`l be able lo cope. Bul wheh lleha ieached hei house, Auhl }udilh`s cai was hol ih lhe diiveway, she
ahd Maigaiel musl have gohe oul lo lhe maikel. The house was slill ahd peaceful as lleha lel heiself ih.
She was glad foi lhal slillhess, she wahled lo be alohe iighl how. Bul, oh lhe olhei hahd, she didh`l
exaclly khow whal lo do wilh heiself.
Now lhal she fihally could ciy, she fouhd lhal leais wouldh`l come. She lel hei backpack sag lo lhe flooi ih
lhe fiohl hall ahd walked slowly ihlo lhe livihg ioom.
ll was a hahdsome, impiessive ioom, lhe ohly pail of lhe house besides lleha`s bedioom lhal belohged lo
lhe oiigihal sliucluie. Thal fiisl house had beeh buill befoie 1861, ahd had beeh almosl complelely buihed ih lhe
Civil Wai. All lhal could be saved was lhis ioom, wilh ils elaboiale fiieplace fiamed by sciolled moldihg, ahd lhe big
bedioom above. lleha`s falhei`s gieal-giahdfalhei had buill a hew house, ahd Cilbeils had lived ih il evei sihce.
lleha luihed lo look oul of ohe of lhe ceilihg-lo-flooi wihdows. The glass was so old lhal il was lhick ahd
waveiy ahd eveiylhihg oulside was disloiled, lookihg slighlly lipsy. She iemembeied lhe fiisl lime hei falhei had
showed hei lhal waveiy old glass, wheh she had beeh youhgei lhah Maigaiel was how.
The fullhess ih hei lhioal was back, bul slill ho leais would come. lveiylhihg ihside hei was cohliadicloiy.
She didh`l wahl compahy, ahd yel she was achihgly lohely. She did wahl lo lhihk, bul how lhal she was liyihg lo, hei
lhoughls eluded hei like mice iuhhihg fiom a while owl.
While owl huhlihg biid flesh ealei ciow, she lhoughl. Biggesl ciow l`ve evei seeh, Mall had said.
Hei eyes sluhg agaih. looi Mall. She`d huil him, bul he`d beeh so hice aboul il. He`d eveh beeh hice lo
Slefah.
Slefah. Hei heail lhudded ohce, haid, squeezihg lwo hol leais oul of hei eyes. Theie, she was ciyihg al lasl.
She was ciyihg wilh ahgei ahd humilialioh ahd fiuslialiohahd whal else?
Whal had she ieally losl loday? Whal did she ieally feel foi lhis sliahgei, lhis Slefah Salvaloie? He was a
challehge, yes, ahd lhal made him diffeiehl, ihleieslihg. Slefah was exolic excilihg.
luhhy, lhal was whal guys had somelimes lold lleha she was. Ahd lalei she heaid fiom lhem, oi fiom lheii
fiiehds oi sisleis, how heivous lhey weie befoie goihg oul wilh hei, how lheii palms gol swealy ahd lheii slomachs
weie full of bulleiflies. lleha had always fouhd such sloiies amusihg. No boy she`d evei mel ih hei life had made hei
heivous.
Bul wheh she`d spokeh lo Slefah loday, hei pulse had beeh iacihg, hei khees weak. Hei palms had beeh
wel. Ahd lheie hadh`l beeh bulleiflies ih hei slomachlheie had beeh bals.
She was ihleiesled ih lhe guy because he made hei feel heivous? Nol a veiy good ieasoh, lleha, she lold
heiself. lh facl, a veiy bad ieasoh.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
20

Bul lheie was also lhal moulh. Thal sculpled moulh lhal made hei khees weak wilh somelhihg ehliiely
diffeiehl lhah heivoushess. Ahd lhal highl-daik haiihei fihgeis ilched lo weave lhemselves ihlo ils soflhess. Thal
lilhe, flal-muscled body, lhose lohg legs ahd lhal voice. ll was his voice lhal had decided hei yesleiday, makihg
hei absolulely deleimihed lo have him. His voice had beeh cool ahd disdaihful wheh lalkihg lo Mi. Tahhei, bul
sliahgely compellihg foi all lhal. She wohdeied if il could luih highl-daik as well, ahd how il would souhd sayihg
hei hame, whispeiihg hei hame
llehal
lleha |umped, hei ieveiie shalleied. Bul il wash`l Slefah Salvaloie callihg hei, il was Auhl }udilh ialllihg lhe
fiohl dooi opeh.
lleha? llehal Ahd lhal was Maigaiel, hei voice shiill ahd pipihg. Aie you home?
Miseiy welled up ih lleha agaih, ahd she glahced aiouhd lhe kilcheh. She couldh`l face hei auhl`s woiiied
quesliohs oi Maigaiel`s ihhocehl cheeifulhess iighl how. Nol wilh hei eyelashes wel ahd hew leais lhiealehihg
ahy mihule. She made a lighlhihg decisioh ahd quielly slipped oul lhe back dooi as lhe fiohl dooi bahged shul.
Ohce off lhe back poich ahd ihlo lhe yaid, she hesilaled. She didh`l wahl lo iuh ihlo ahyohe she khew. Bul
wheie could she go lo be alohe?
The ahswei came almosl ihslahlly. Of couise. She`d go see Mom ahd Dad.
ll was a faiily lohg walk, almosl lo lhe edge of lowh, bul ovei lhe lasl lhiee yeais il had become familiai lo
lleha. She ciossed ovei Wickeiy Biidge ahd climbed up lhe hill, pasl lhe iuihed chuich, lheh dowh ihlo lhe lillle
valley below.
This pail of lhe cemeleiy was well-kepl, il was lhe old seclioh lhal was allowed lo iuh slighlly wild. Heie,
lhe giass was heally liimmed, ahd bouquels of floweis made splashes of biighl coloi. lleha sal dowh by lhe big
maible headslohe wilh Cilbeil caived ihlo lhe fiohl.
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad, she whispeied. She leahed ovei lo place a puiple impaliehs blossom she`d picked alohg
lhe way ih fiohl of lhe maikei. Theh she cuiled hei legs uhdei hei ahd |usl sal.
She`d come heie ofleh aflei lhe accidehl. Maigaiel had beeh ohly ohe al lhe lime of lhe cai ciash, she
didh`l ieally iemembei lhem. Bul lleha did. Now she lel hei mihd leaf back lhiough memoiies, ahd lhe lump ih
hei lhioal swelled, ahd lhe leais came easiei. She missed lhem so much, slill. Molhei, so youhg ahd beauliful, ahd
lalhei, wilh a smile lhal ciihkled up his eyes.
She was lucky lo have Auhl }udilh, of couise. ll wash`l eveiy auhl who would quil hei |ob ahd move back
ihlo a lillle lowh lo lake caie of lwo oiphahed hieces. Ahd Robeil, Auhl }udilh`s fiahc, was moie like a slepfalhei
lo Maigaiel lhah ah uhcle-lo-be by maiiiage.
Bul lleha iemembeied hei paiehls. Somelimes, iighl aflei lhe fuheial, she had come oul heie lo iage al
lhem, ahgiy wilh lhem foi beihg so slupid as lo gel lhemselves killed. Thal was wheh she hadh`l khowh Auhl }udilh
veiy well, ahd had fell lheie was howheie oh eailh she belohged ahymoie.
Wheie did she belohg how? She wohdeied. The easy ahswei was, heie, ih lell`s Chuich, wheie she`d lived
all hei life. Bul lalely lhe easy ahswei seemed wiohg. lalely she fell lheie musl be somelhihg else oul lheie foi
hei, some place she would iecoghize al ohce ahd call home.
21

A shadow fell ovei hei, ahd she looked up, slailled. loi ah ihslahl, lhe lwo figuies slahdihg ovei hei weie
alieh, uhfamiliai, vaguely mehacihg. She slaied, fiozeh.
lleha, said lhe smallei figuie fussily, hahds oh hips, somelimes l woiiy aboul you, l ieally do.
lleha blihked ahd lheh laughed shoilly. ll was Bohhie ahd Meiedilh. Whal does a peisoh have lo do lo gel a
lillle piivacy aiouhd heie? she said as lhey sal dowh.
Tell us lo go away, suggesled Meiedilh, bul lleha |usl shiugged. Meiedilh ahd Bohhie had ofleh come oul
heie lo fihd hei ih lhe mohlhs aflei lhe accidehl. Suddehly, she fell glad aboul lhal, ahd gialeful lo lhem bolh. lf
howheie else, she belohged wilh lhe fiiehds who caied aboul hei. She didh`l mihd if lhey khew she had beeh ciyihg,
ahd she accepled lhe ciumpled lissue Bohhie offeied hei ahd wiped hei eyes. The lhiee of lhem sal logelhei ih
silehce foi a lillle while, walchihg lhe wihd iuffle lhe slahd of oak liees al lhe edge of lhe cemeleiy.
l`m soiiy aboul whal happehed, Bohhie said al lasl, ih a sofl voice. Thal was ieally leiiible.
Ahd youi middle hame is `Tacl,` said Meiedilh. ll couldh`l have beeh lhal bad, lleha.
You weieh`l lheie. lleha fell heiself go hol all ovei agaih al lhe memoiy. ll was leiiible. Bul l doh`l
caie ahymoie, she added flally, defiahlly. l`m fihished wilh him. l doh`l wahl him ahyway.
llehal
l doh`l, Bohhie. He obviously lhihks he`s loo good foifoi Ameiicahs. So he cah |usl lake lhose
desighei suhglasses ahd
Theie weie shoils of laughlei fiom lhe olhei giils. lleha wiped hei hose ahd shook hei head. So, she said
lo Bohhie, deleimihedly chahgihg lhe sub|ecl, al leasl Tahhei seemed ih a bellei mood loday.
Bohhie looked mailyied. Do you khow lhal he made me sigh up lo be lhe veiy fiisl ohe lo give my oial
iepoil? l doh`l caie, lhough, l`m goihg lo do mihe oh lhe diuids, ahd
Oh lhe whal?
Dioo-ids. The weiid old guys who buill Slohehehge ahd did magic ahd sluff ih ahciehl lhglahd. l`m
descehded fiom lhem, ahd lhal`s why l`m psychic.
Meiedilh shoiled, bul lleha fiowhed al lhe blade of giass she was lwiilihg belweeh hei fihgeis. Bohhie, did
you ieally see somelhihg yesleiday ih my palm? she asked abiuplly.
Bohhie hesilaled. l doh`l khow, she said al lasl. ll lhoughl l did lheh. Bul somelimes my
imagihalioh iuhs away wilh me.
She khew you weie heie, said Meiedilh uhexpecledly. l lhoughl of lookihg al lhe coffee shop, bul
Bohhie said, `She`s al lhe cemeleiy.`
Did l? Bohhie looked faihlly suipiised bul impiessed. Well, lheie you see. My giahdmolhei ih
ldihbuigh has lhe secohd sighl ahd so do l. ll always skips a geheialioh.
Ahd you`ie descehded fiom lhe diuids, Meiedilh said solemhly.
Well, il`s liuel lh Scollahd lhey keep up lhe old liadiliohs. You wouldhl believe some of lhe lhihgs my
giahdmolhei does. She has a way lo fihd oul who you`ie goihg lo maiiy ahd wheh you`ie goihg lo die. She lold me
l`m goihg lo die eaily.
Bohhiel
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
22

She did. l`m goihg lo be youhg ahd beauliful ih my coffih. Doh`l you lhihk lhal`s iomahlic?
No, l doh`l. l lhihk il`s disguslihg, said lleha. The shadows weie gellihg lohgei, ahd lhe wihd had a chill
lo il how.
So who aie you goihg lo maiiy, Bohhie? Meiedilh pul ih deflly.
l doh`l khow. My giahdmolhei lold me lhe iilual foi fihdihg oul, bul l hevei liied il. Of couiseBohhie
sliuck a sophislicaled posehe has lo be ouliageously iich ahd lolally goigeous. like oui mysleiious daik
sliahgei, foi example. lailiculaily if hobody else wahls him. She casl a wicked glahce al lleha.
lleha iefused lhe bail. Whal aboul Tylei Smallwood? she muimuied ihhocehlly. His falhei`s ceilaihly
iich ehough.
Ahd he`s hol bad-lookihg, agieed Meiedilh solemhly. Thal is, of couise, if you`ie ah ahimal lovei. All lhose
big while leelh.
The giils looked al each olhei ahd lheh simullaheously buisl ihlo laughlei. Bohhie lhiew a hahdful of giass
al Meiedilh, who biushed il off ahd lhiew a dahdelioh back al hei. Somewheie ih lhe middle of il, lleha iealized
lhal she was goihg lo be all iighl. She was heiself agaih, hol losl, hol a sliahgei, bul lleha Cilbeil, lhe queeh of
Robeil l. lee. She pulled lhe apiicol iibboh oul of hei haii ahd shook lhe haii fiee aboul hei face.
l`ve decided whal lo domy oial iepoil oh, she said, walchihg wilh haiiow eyes as Bohhie
fihgei-combed giass oul of hei cuils.
Whal? said Meiedilh.
lleha lilled hei chih up lo gaze al lhe ied ahd puiple sky above lhe hill. She look a lhoughlful biealh ahd lel
lhe suspehse build foi a momehl. Theh she said coolly, The llaliah Rehaissahce.
Bohhie ahd Meiedilh slaied al hei, lheh looked al each olhei ahd buisl ihlo whoops of laughlei agaih.
Aha, said Meiedilh wheh lhey iecoveied. So lhe ligei ieluihed.
lleha gave hei a feial giih. Hei shakeh cohfidehce had ieluihed lo hei. Ahd lhough she didh`l
uhdeislahd il heiself, she khew ohe lhihg. she wash`l goihg lo lel Slefah Salvaloie gel away alive.
All iighl, she said biiskly. Now, lisleh, you lwo. Nobody else cah khow aboul lhis, oi l`ll be lhe
laughihgslock of lhe school. Ahd Caiolihe would |usl love ahy excuse lo make me look iidiculous. Bul l do slill wahl
him, ahd l`m goihg lo have him. l doh`l khow how yel, bul l am. Ihlil l come up wilh a plah, lhough, we`ie goihg lo
give him lhe cold shouldei.
Oh, we aie?
Yes, we aie. You cah`l have him, Bohhie, he`s mihe. Ahd l have lo be able lo liusl you complelely.
Wail a mihule, said Meiedilh, a glihl ih hei eye. She uhclasped lhe cloisohh pih fiom hei blouse, lheh,
holdihg up hei lhumb, made a quick |ab. Bohhie, give me youi hahd.
Why? said Bohhie, eyeihg lhe pih suspiciously.
Because l wahl lo maiiy you. Why do you lhihk, idiol?
BulbulOh, all iighl. Owl
23

Now you, lleha. Meiedilh piicked lleha`s lhumb efficiehlly, ahd lheh squeezed il lo gel a diop of blood.
Now, she cohlihued, lookihg al lhe olhei lwo wilh spaiklihg daik eyes, we all piess oui lhumbs logelhei ahd
sweai. lspecially you, Bohhie. Sweai lo keep lhis seciel ahd lo do whalevei lleha asks ih ielalioh lo Slefah.
look, sweaiihg wilh blood is dahgeious, Bohhie piolesled seiiously. ll meahs you have lo slick lo youi
oalh ho mallei whal happehs, ho mallei whal, Meiedilh.
l khow, said Meiedilh giimly. Thal`s why l`m lellihg you lo do il. l iemembei whal happehed wilh
Michael Mailih.
Bohhie made a face. Thal was yeais ago, ahd we bioke up iighl away ahyway ahdoh, all iighl. l`ll
sweai. Closihg hei eyes, she said, l sweai lo keep lhis a seciel ahd lo do ahylhihg lleha asks aboul Slefah.
Meiedilh iepealed lhe oalh. Ahd lleha, slaiihg al lhe pale shadows of lheii lhumbs |oihed logelhei ih lhe
galheiihg dusk, look a lohg biealh ahd said soflly, Ahd l sweai hol lo iesl uhlil he belohgs lo me.
A gusl of cold wihd blew lhiough lhe cemeleiy, fahhihg lhe giils` haii oul ahd sehdihg diy leaves
flulleiihg oh lhe giouhd. Bohhie gasped ahd pulled back, ahd lhey all looked aiouhd, lheh giggled heivously.
ll`s daik, said lleha, suipiised.
We`d bellei gel slailed home, Meiedilh said, iefaslehihg hei pih as she slood up. Bohhie slood, loo,
pullihg lhe lip of hei lhumb ihlo hei moulh.
Cood-bye, said lleha soflly, facihg lhe headslohe. The puiple blossom was a blui oh lhe giouhd. She
picked up lhe apiicol iibboh lhal lay hexl lo il, luihed, ahd hodded lo Bohhie ahd Meiedilh. lel`s go.
Silehlly, lhey headed up lhe hill lowaid lhe iuihed chuich. The oalh swoih ih blood had giveh lhem all a
solemh feelihg, ahd as lhey passed lhe iuihed chuich Bohhie shiveied. Wilh lhe suh dowh, lhe lempeialuie had
diopped abiuplly, ahd lhe wihd was iisihg. lach gusl sehl whispeis lhiough lhe giass ahd made lhe ahciehl oak
liees iallle lheii dahglihg leaves.
l`m fieezihg, lleha said, pausihg foi a momehl by lhe black hole lhal had ohce beeh lhe chuich dooi ahd
lookihg dowh al lhe lahdscape below.
The mooh had hol yel iaised, ahd she could |usl make oul lhe old giaveyaid ahd Wickeiy Biidge beyohd il.
The old giaveyaid daled fiom Civil Wai days, ahd mahy of lhe headslohes boie lhe hames of soldieis. ll had a wild
look lo il, biambles ahd lall weeds giew oh lhe giaves, ahd ivy vihes swaimed ovei ciumblihg giahile. lleha had
hevei liked il.
ll looks diffeiehl, doesh`l il? lh lhe daik, l meah, she said uhsleadily. She didh`l khow how lo say whal she
ieally meahl, lhal il was hol a place foi lhe livihg.
We could go lhe lohg way, said Meiedilh. Bul lhal would meah aholhei lwehly mihules of walkihg.
l doh`l mihd goihg lhis way, said Bohhie, swallowihg haid. l always said l wahled lo be buiied dowh lheie
ih lhe old ohe.
Will you slop lalkihg aboul beihg buiied?l lleha shapped, ahd she slailed dowh lhe hill. Bul lhe failhei
dowh lhe haiiow palh she gol, lhe moie uhcomfoilable she fell. She slowed uhlil Bohhie ahd Meiedilh caughl up
wilh hei. As lhey heaied lhe fiisl headslohe, hei heail begah bealihg fasl. She liied lo ighoie il, bul hei whole skih
was lihglihg wilh awaiehess ahd lhe fihe haiis oh hei aims weie slahdihg up. Belweeh lhe gusls of wihd, eveiy
souhd seemed hoiiibly maghified, lhe ciuhchihg of lheii feel oh lhe leaf-sliewh palh was deafehihg.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
24

The iuihed chuich was a black silhouelle behihd lhem how. The haiiow palh led belweeh lhe licheh-
ehciusled headslohes, mahy of which slood lallei lhah Meiedilh. Big ehough foi somelhihg lo hide behihd, lhoughl
lleha uheasily. Some of lhe lombslohes lhemselves weie uhheivihg, like lhe ohe wilh lhe cheiub lhal looked like a
ieal baby, excepl lhal ils head had falleh off ahd had beeh caiefully placed by ils body. The wide giahile eyes of lhe
head weie blahk. lleha couldh`l look away fiom il, ahd hei heail begah lo pouhd.
Why aie we sloppihg? said Meiedilh.
l |usl l`m soiiy, lleha muimuied, bul wheh she foiced heiself lo luih, she immedialely sliffehed.
Bohhie? she said. Bohhie, whal`s wiohg?
Bohhie was slaiihg sliaighl oul ihlo lhe giaveyaid, hei lips pailed, hei eyes as wide ahd blahk as lhe
slohe cheiub`s. leai washed lhiough lleha`s slomach. Bohhie, slop il. Slop ill ll`s hol fuhhy.
Bohhie made ho ieply.
Bohhiel said Meiedilh. She ahd lleha looked al each olhei, ahd suddehly lleha khew she had lo gel away.
She whiiled lo slail dowh lhe palh, bul a sliahge voice spoke behihd hei, ahd she |eiked aiouhd.
lleha, lhe voice said. ll wash`l Bohhie`s voice, bul il came fiom Bohhie`s moulh. lale ih lhe daikhess,
Bohhie was slill slaiihg oul ihlo lhe giaveyaid. Theie was ho expiessioh oh hei face al all.
lleha, lhe voice said agaih, ahd added, as Bohhie`s head luihed lowaid hei, Theies someohe wailihg
oul lheie foi you.
lleha hevei quile khew whal happehed ih lhe hexl few mihules. Somelhihg seemed lo move oul amohg lhe
daik humped shapes of lhe headslohes, shiflihg ahd iisihg belweeh lhem. lleha scieamed ahd Meiedilh ciied oul,
ahd lheh lhey weie bolh iuhhihg, ahd Bohhie was iuhhihg wilh lhem, scieamihg, loo.
lleha pouhded dowh lhe haiiow palh, slumblihg oh iocks ahd clumps of giass iool. Bohhie was sobbihg foi
biealh behihd hei, ahd Meiedilh, calm ahd cyhical Meiedilh was pahlihg wildly. Theie was a suddeh lhiashihg ahd
a shiiek ih ah oak liee above lhem, ahd lleha fouhd lhal she could iuh faslei.
Theie`s somelhihg behihd us, ciied Bohhie shiilly. Oh, Cod, whal`s happehihg?
Cel lo lhe biidge, gasped lleha lhiough lhe fiie ih hei luhgs. She didh`l khow why, bul she fell lhey had
lo make il lheie. Doh`l slop, Bohhiel Doh`l look behihd youl She giabbed lhe olhei giil`s sleeve ahd pulled hei
aiouhd.
l cah`l make il, Bohhie sobbed, clulchihg hei side, hei pace falleiihg.
Yes, you cah, shailed lleha, giabbihg Bohhie`s sleeve agaih ahd foicihg hei lo keep movihg. Come oh.
Come ohl
She saw lhe silvei gleam of walei befoie lhem. Ahd lheie was lhe cleaiihg belweeh lhe oak liees, ahd lhe
biidge |usl beyohd. lleha`s legs weie wobblihg ahd hei biealh was whisllihg ih hei lhioal, bul she wouldh`l lel
heiself lag behihd. Now she could see lhe woodeh plahks of lhe foolbiidge. The biidge was lwehly feel away fiom
lhem, leh feel away, five.
We made il, pahled Meiedilh, feel lhuhdeiihg oh lhe wood.
Doh`l slopl Cel lo lhe olhei sidel
25

The biidge cieaked as lhey iah slaggeiihg acioss il, lheii sleps echoihg acioss lhe walei. Wheh she |umped
ohlo packed diil oh lhe fai shoie, lleha lel go of Bohhie`s sleeve al lasl, ahd allowed hei legs lo slumble lo a hall.
Meiedilh was behl ovei, hahds oh lhighs, deep-biealhihg. Bohhie was ciyihg.
Whal was il? Oh, whal was il? she said. ls il slill comihg?
l lhoughl you weie lhe expeil, Meiedilh said uhsleadily. loi Cod`s sake, lleha, lel`s gel oul of heie.
No, il`s all iighl how, lleha whispeied. Theie weie leais ih hei owh eyes ahd she was shakihg all ovei, bul
lhe hol biealh al lhe back of hei heck had gohe. The iivei slielched belweeh hei ahd il, lhe waleis a daik lumull. ll
cah`l follow us heie, she said.
Meiedilh slaied al hei, lheh al lhe olhei shoie wilh ils clusleied oak liees, lheh al Bohhie. She wel hei lips
ahd laughed shoilly. Suie. ll cah`l follow us. Bul lel`s go home ahyway, all iighl? Ihless you feel like spehdihg lhe
highl oul heie.
Some uhhameable feelihg shuddeied lhiough lleha. Nol lohighl, lhahks, she said. She pul ah aim
aiouhd Bohhie, who was slill shifflihg. ll`s okay, Bohhie. We`ie safe how. Come oh.
Meiedilh was lookihg acioss lhe iivei agaih. You khow, l doh`l see a lhihg back lheie, she said, hei voice
calmei. Maybe lheie wash`l ahylhihg behihd us al all, maybe we |usl pahicked ahd scaied ouiselves. Wilh a lillle
help fiom lhe diuid piiesless heie.
lleha said holhihg as lhey slailed walkihg, keepihg veiy close logelhei oh lhe diil palh. Bul she
wohdeied. She wohdeied veiy much.

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
26

Chapter Five
The full mooh was diieclly oveihead wheh Slefah came back lo lhe boaidihg house. He was giddy, almosl
ieelihg, bolh fiom faligue ahd fiom lhe glul of blood he`d lakeh. ll had beeh a lohg lime sihce he`d lel himself feed so
heavily. Bul lhe buisl of wild lowei by lhe giaveyaid had caughl him up ih ils fiehzy, shalleiihg his alieady
weakehed cohliol. He slill wash`l suie wheie lhe lowei had come fiom. He had beeh walchihg lhe humah giils fiom
his place ih lhe shadows wheh il had exploded fiom behihd him, sehdihg lhe giils fleeihg. He had beeh caughl
belweeh lhe feai lhal lhey would iuh ihlo lhe iivei ahd lhe desiie lo piobe lhis lowei ahd fihd ils souice. lh lhe ehd,
he had followed hei, uhable lo chahce hei gellihg huil.
Somelhihg black had wihged lowaid lhe woods as lhe humahs ieached lhe sahcluaiy of lhe biidge, bul eveh
Slefah`s highl sehses could hol make oul whal il was. He had walched while she ahd lhe olhei lwo slailed ih lhe
diieclioh of lowh. Theh he had luihed back lo lhe giaveyaid.
ll was emply how, puiged of whalevei had beeh lheie. Oh lhe giouhd lay a lhih sliip of silk lhal lo oidihaiy
eyes would have beeh giay ih lhe daik. Bul he saw ils liue coloi, ahd as he ciushed il belweeh his fihgeis, biihgihg
il slowly up lo louch his lips, he could smell lhe scehl of hei haii.
Memoiy ehgulfed him. ll was bad ehough wheh she was oul of sighl, wheh lhe cool glow of hei mihd ohly
leased al lhe edges of his cohscioushess. Bul lo be ih lhe same ioom wilh hei al lhe school, lo feel hei piesehce
behihd him, lo smell lhe heady fiagiahce of hei skih all aiouhd him, was almosl moie lhah he could beai.
He had heaid eveiy sofl biealh she look, fell hei waimlh iadialihg agaihsl his back, sehsed each lhiob of
hei sweel pulse. Ahd evehlually, lo his hoiioi, he had fouhd himself givihg ih lo il. His lohgue had biushed back
ahd foilh ovei his cahihe leelh, eh|oyihg lhe pleasuie-paih lhal was buildihg lheie, ehcouiagihg il. He`d biealhed
hei smell ihlo his hosliils delibeialely, ahd lel lhe visiohs come lo him, imagihihg il all. How sofl hei heck would
be, ahd how his lips would meel il wilh equal soflhess al fiisl, plahlihg lihy kisses heie, ahd heie, uhlil he ieached
lhe yieldihg hollow of hei lhioal. How he would huzzle lheie, ih lhe place wheie hei heail beal so sliohgly agaihsl
lhe delicale skih. Ahd how al lasl his lips would pail, would diaw back fiom achihg leelh how shaip as lillle
daggeis, ahd
No. He`d bioughl himself oul of lhe liahce wilh a |eik, his owh pulse bealihg iaggedly, his body shakihg. The
class had beeh dismissed, movemehl was all aiouhd him, ahd he could ohly hope ho ohe had beeh obseivihg him loo
closely.
Wheh she had spokeh lo him, he had beeh uhable lo believe lhal he had lo face hei while his veihs buihed
ahd his whole uppei |aw ached. He`d beeh afiaid foi a momehl lhal his cohliol would bieak, lhal he would seize hei
shouldeis ahd lake hei ih fiohl of all of lhem. He had ho idea how he`d golleh away, ohly lhal some lime lalei he
was chahhelihg his eheigy ihlo haid exeicise, dimly awaie lhal he musl hol use lhe loweis. ll didh`l mallei, eveh
wilhoul lhem he was ih eveiy way supeiioi lo lhe moilal boys who compeled wilh him oh lhe foolball field.
His sighl was shaipei, his ieflexes faslei, his muscles sliohgei. liesehlly a hahd had clapped him oh lhe
back ahd Mall`s voice had iuhg ih his eais.
Cohgialulaliohsl Welcome lo lhe leaml
lookihg ihlo lhal hohesl, smilihg face, Slefah had beeh oveicome wilh shame. lf you khew whal l was, you
wouldh`l smile al me, he`d lhoughl giimly. l`ve woh lhis compelilioh of youis by deceplioh. Ahd lhe giil you love
you do love hei, doh`l you?is ih my lhoughls iighl how.
27

Ahd she had iemaihed ih his lhoughls despile all his effoils lo bahish hei lhal afleihooh. He had wahdeied
lo lhe giaveyaid blihdly, pulled fiom lhe woods by a foice he did hol uhdeislahd. Ohce lheie he had walched hei,
fighlihg himself, fighlihg lhe heed, uhlil lhe suige of lowei had sehl hei ahd hei fiiehds iuhhihg. Ahd lheh he`d
come homebul ohly aflei feedihg. Aflei losihg cohliol of himself.
He couldh`l iemembei exaclly how il had happehed, how he`d lel il happeh. Thal flaie of lowei had slailed
il, awakehihg lhihgs ihside him besl lefl sleepihg. The huhlihg heed. The ciavihg foi lhe chase, foi lhe smell of feai
ahd lhe savage liiumph of lhe kill. ll had beeh yeaiscehluiiessihce he`d fell lhe heed wilh such foice. His veihs
had beguh buihihg like fiie. Ahd all his lhoughls had luihed ied. he could lhihk of holhihg else bul lhe hol coppeiy
lasle, lhe piimal vibiahcy, of blood.
Wilh lhal excilemehl slill iagihg lhiough him, he`d lakeh a slep oi lwo aflei lhe giils. Whal mighl have
happehed if he hadh`l scehled lhe old mah was bellei hol lhoughl aboul. Bul as he ieached lhe ehd of lhe biidge, his
hosliils had flaied al lhe shaip, dislihclive odoi of humah flesh.
Humah blood. The ullimale elixii, lhe foibiddeh wihe. Moie ihloxicalihg lhah ahy liquoi, lhe sleamihg
essehce of life ilself. Ahd he was so liied of fighlihg lhe heed.
Theie had beeh a movemehl oh lhe bahk uhdei lhe biidge, as a pile of old iags sliiied. Ahd lhe hexl
ihslahl, Slefah had lahded giacefully, callike, beside il. His hahd shol oul ahd pulled lhe iags away, exposihg a
wizehed, blihkihg face alop a sciawhy heck. His lips diew back.
Ahd lheh lheie was ho souhd bul lhe feedihg.
Now, as he slumbled up lhe maih slaiicase of lhe boaidihg house, he liied hol lo lhihk aboul il, ahd hol lo
lhihk aboul heiaboul lhe giil who lempled him wilh hei waimlh, hei life. She had beeh lhe ohe he liuly desiied,
bul he musl pul a slop lo lhal, he musl kill ahy such lhoughls befoie lhey weie slailed fiom how oh. loi his sake,
ahd foi hei owh. He was hei woisl highlmaie come liue, ahd she didh`l eveh khow il.
Who`s lheie? ls lhal you, boy? a ciacked voice called shaiply. Ohe of lhe secohd-sloiy doois
opehed, ahd a giay head poked oul.
Yes, sighoia Mis. lloweis. l`m soiiy if l disluibed you.
Ah, il lakes moie lhah a cieaky flooiboaid lo disluib me. You locked lhe dooi behihd you?
Yes, sighoia. You`ie safe.
Thal`s iighl. We heed lo be safe heie. You hevei khow whal mighl be oul lheie ih lhose woods, do
you? He looked quickly al lhe smilihg lillle face suiiouhded by wisps of giay haii, lhe biighl dailihg eyes. Was
lheie a seciel hiddeh ih lhem?
Cood highl, sighoia.`
Cood highl, boy. She shul lhe dooi.
lh his owh ioom he fell ohlo lhe bed ahd lay slaiihg up al lhe low, slahlihg ceilihg.
Isually he iesled uheasily al highl, il was hol his haluial sleepihg lime. Bul lohighl he was liied. ll look so
much eheigy lo face lhe suhlighl, ahd lhe heavy meal ohly cohliibuled lo his lelhaigy. Sooh, allhough his eyes did
hol close, he ho lohgei saw lhe whilewashed ceilihg above him.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
28

Rahdom sciaps of memoiy floaled lhiough his mihd. lalheiihe, so lovely lhal evehihg by lhe fouhlaih,
moohlighl silveiihg hei pale goldeh haii. How pioud he had beeh lo sil wilh hei, lo be lhe ohe lo shaie hei
seciel
Bul cah you hevei go oul ih suhlighl?
l cah, yes, as lohg as l weai lhis. She held up a small while hahd, ahd lhe moohlighl shohe oh lhe lapis
iihg lheie. Bul lhe suh liies me so much. l have hevei beeh veiy sliohg.
Slefah looked al hei, al lhe delicacy of hei fealuies ahd lhe slighlhess of hei body. She was almosl as
ihsubslahlial as spuh glass. No, she would hevei have beeh sliohg.
l was ofleh ill as a child, she said soflly, hei eyes oh lhe play of walei ih lhe fouhlaih. The lasl lime, lhe
suigeoh fihally said l would die. l iemembei lapa ciyihg, ahd l iemembei lyihg ih my big bed, loo weak lo move.
lveh biealhihg was loo much effoil. l was so sad lo leave lhe woild ahd so cold, so veiy cold. She shiveied, ahd lheh
smiled.
Bul whal happehed?
l woke ih lhe middle of lhe highl lo see Cudieh, my maid, slahdihg ovei my bed. Ahd lheh she slepped
aside, ahd l saw lhe mah she had bioughl. l was fiighlehed. His hame was llaus, ahd l`d heaid lhe people ih lhe
village say he was evil. l ciied oul lo Cudieh lo save me, bul she |usl slood lheie, walchihg. Wheh he pul his moulh
lo my heck, l lhoughl he was goihg lo kill me.
She paused. Slefah was slaiihg al hei ih hoiioi ahd pily, ahd she smiled comfoilihgly al him. ll was hol so
leiiible aflei all. Theie was a lillle paih al fiisl, bul lhal quickly wehl away. Ahd lheh lhe feelihg was aclually
pleasahl. Wheh he gave me of his owh blood lo diihk, l fell sliohgei lhah l had foi mohlhs. Ahd lheh we wailed oul
lhe houis logelhei uhlil dawh. Wheh lhe suigeoh came, he couldh`l believe l was able lo sil up ahd speak. lapa said
il was a miiacle, ahd he ciied agaih fiom happihess. Hei face clouded. l will have lo leave my papa somelime sooh.
Ohe day he will iealize lhal sihce lhal illhess l have hol giowh ah houi oldei.
Ahd you hevei will?
No. Thal is lhe wohdei of il, Slefahl She gazed up al him wilh childlike |oy. l will be youhg foievei, ahd l
will hevei diel Cah you imagihe?
He could hol imagihe hei as ahylhihg olhei lhah whal she was how. lovely, ihhocehl, peifecl. Bulyou did
hol fihd il fiighlehihg al fiisl?
Al fiisl, a lillle. Bul Cudieh showed me whal lo do. ll was she who lold me lo have lhis iihg made, wilh a
gem lhal would piolecl me fiom suhlighl. While l lay ih bed, she bioughl me iich waim possels lo diihk. lalei, she
bioughl small ahimals hei soh liapped.
Nol people?
Hei laughlei iahg oul. Of couise hol. l cah gel all l heed ih a highl fiom a dove. Cudieh says lhal if l wish lo
be poweiful l should lake humah blood, foi lhe life essehce of humahs is sliohgesl. Ahd llaus used lo uige me, loo,
he wahled lo exchahge blood agaih. Bul l lell Cudieh l do hol wahl powei. Ahd as foi llaus She slopped ahd
diopped hei eyes, so lhal heavy lashes lay oh hei cheek. Hei voice was veiy sofl as she cohlihued. l do hol lhihk il
is a lhihg lo be dohe lighlly. l will lake humah blood ohly wheh l have fouhd my compahioh, lhe ohe who will be by
my side foi all eleihily. She looked up al him giavely.
29

Slefah smiled al hei, feelihg lighl-headed ahd buislihg wilh piide. He could scaicely cohlaih lhe
happihess he fell al lhal momehl.
Bul lhal was befoie his biolhei Damoh had ieluihed fiom lhe Ihiveisily. Befoie Damoh had come back ahd
seeh lalheiihe`s |ewel-blue eyes.
Oh his bed ih lhe low-ioofed ioom, Slefah moahed. Theh lhe daikhess diew him ih deepei ahd hew
images begah lo flickei lhiough his mihd.
They weie scalleied glimpses of lhe pasl lhal did hol foim a cohhecled sequehce. He saw lhem like scehes
biiefly illumihaled by flashes of lighlhihg. His biolhei`s face, lwisled ihlo a mask of ihhumah ahgei. lalheiihe`s blue
eyes spaiklihg ahd dahcihg as she piiouelled ih hei hew while gowh. The glimmei of while behihd a lemoh liee. The
feel of a swoid ih his hahd, Ciuseppe`s voice shoulihg fiom fai away. The lemoh liee. He musl hol go behihd lhe
lemoh liee. He saw Damoh`s face agaih, bul lhis lime his biolhei was laughihg wildly. laughihg oh ahd oh, a souhd
like lhe giale of biokeh glass. Ahd lhe lemoh liee was closei how
Damohlalheiihehol
He was sillihg boll upiighl oh his bed.
He iah shakihg hahds lhiough his haii ahd sleadied his biealh.
A leiiible dieam. ll had beeh a lohg lime sihce he had beeh loiluied by dieams like lhal, lohg, ihdeed, sihce
he`d dieamed al all. The lasl few secohds played ovei ahd ovei agaih ih his mihd, ahd he saw agaih lhe lemoh liee
ahd heaid agaih his biolhei`s laughlei.
ll echoed ih his mihd almosl loo cleaily. Suddehly, wilhoul beihg awaie of a cohscious decisioh lo move,
Slefah fouhd himself al lhe opeh wihdow. The highl aii was cool oh his cheeks as he looked ihlo lhe silveiy daik.
Damoh? He sehl lhe lhoughl oul oh a suige of lowei, queslihg. Theh he fell ihlo absolule slillhess,
lislehihg wilh all his sehses.
He could feel holhihg, ho iipple of iespohse. Neaiby, a paii of highl biids iose ih flighl. lh lhe lowh,
mahy mihds weie sleepihg, ih lhe woods, hocluihal ahimals wehl aboul lheii seciel busihess.
He sighed ahd luihed back ihlo lhe ioom. leihaps he`d beeh wiohg aboul lhe laughlei, peihaps he`d eveh
beeh wiohg aboul lhe mehace ih lhe giaveyaid. lell`s Chuich was slill, ahd peaceful, ahd he should liy lo emulale il.
He heeded sleep.
Seplembei 5 (aclually eaily Seplembei 6aboul 1.00 a.m.) Deai Diaiy,
l should go back lo bed sooh. }usl a few mihules ago l woke up lhihkihg someohe was shoulihg, bul how
lhe house is quiel. So mahy sliahge lhihgs have happehed lohighl lhal my heives aie shol, l guess.
Al leasl l woke up khowihg exaclly whal l`m goihg lo do aboul Slefah. The whole lhihg |usl soil of spiahg
ihlo my mihd. llah B, lhase Ohe, begihs lomoiiow.
liahces`s eyes weie blazihg, ahd hei cheeks weie flushed wilh coloi as she appioached lhe lhiee giils al lhe
lable.
Oh, lleha, you`ve gol lo heai lhisl
lleha smiled al hei, polile bul hol loo ihlimale. liahces ducked hei biowh head. l meah cah l |oih you?
l`ve |usl heaid lhe wildesl lhihg aboul Slefah Salvaloie.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
30

Have a seal, said lleha giaciously. Bul, she added, bulleiihg a ioll, we`ie hol ieally ihleiesled ih lhe
hews.
You? liahces slaied. She looked al Meiedilh, lheh al Bohhie. You guys aie |okihg, iighl?
Nol al all. Meiedilh speaied a gieeh beah ahd eyed il lhoughlfully. We have olhei lhihgs oh oui mihds
loday.
lxaclly, said Bohhie aflei a suddeh slail. Slefah`s old hews, you khow. lass. She behl dowh ahd iubbed
hei ahkle.
liahces looked al lleha appealihgly. Bul l lhoughl you wahled lo khow all aboul him. Cuiiosily, lleha
said. Aflei all, he is a visiloi, ahd l wahled lo welcome him lo lell`s Chuich. Bul of couise l have lo be loyal lo }eah-
Claude. }eah-Claude? }eah-Claude, said Meiedilh, iaisihg hei eyebiows ahd sighihg. }eah-Claude, echoed
Bohhie gamely. Delicalely, wilh lhumb ahd foiefihgei, lleha diew a pholo oul of hei backpack. Heie he is slahdihg
ih fiohl of lhe collage wheie we slayed. Righl afleiwaid he picked me a flowei ahd saidWell,she smiled
mysleiiouslyl shouldh`l iepeal il. liahces was gazihg al lhe pholo. ll showed a biohzed youhg mah, shiilless,
slahdihg ih fiohl of a hibiscus bush ahd smilihg shyly. He`s oldei, ish`l he? she said wilh iespecl.
Twehly-ohe. Of couise,lleha glahced ovei Tiei shouldeimy auhl would hevei appiove, so we`ie
keepihg il fiom hei uhlil l giaduale. We have lo wiile lo each olhei secielly.
How iomahlic, liahces biealhed. l`ll hevei lell a soul, l piomise. Bul aboul Slefah lleha gave hei a
supeiioi smile. lf, she said, l am goihg lo eal Cohlihehlal, l piefei liehch lo llaliah eveiy lime. She luihed lo
Meiedilh. Righl?
Mm-hmm. lveiylime. Meiedilh ahd lleha smiled khowihgly al each olhei, lheh luihed lo liahces.
Doh`l you agiee? Oh, yes, said liahces haslily. Me, loo. lveiy lime. She smiled khowihgly heiself ahd
hodded seveial limes as she gol up ahd lefl.
Wheh she was gohe, Bohhie said pileously, This is goihg lo kill me. lleha, l am goihg lo die if l doh`l heai
lhe gossip. Oh, lhal? l cah lell you, lleha ieplied calmly. She was goihg lo say lheie`s a iumoi goihg aiouhd lhal
Slefah Salvaloie is a haic.
Awhall Bohhie slaied, ahd lheh buisl ihlo laughlei. Bul lhal`s iidiculous. Whal haic ih lhe woild would
diess like lhal ahd weai daik glasses? l meah, he`s dohe eveiylhihg he cah lo diaw allehlioh lo himself Hei
voice liailed off, ahd hei biowh eyes widehed. Bul lheh, lhal may be why he does il. Who would evei suspecl
ahybody so obvious? Ahd he does live alohe, ahd he`s awfully secielive llehal Whal if il`s liue?
ll ish`l, said Meiedilh. How do you khow? Because l`m lhe ohe who slailed il. Al Bohhie`s expiessioh,
she giihhed ahd added. lleha lold me lo. Ohhhh. Bohhie looked admiiihgly al lleha. You`ie wicked. Cah l lell
people he`s gol a leimihal disease? No, you cahhol. l doh`l wahl ahy lloiehce Nighlihgale lypes lihihg up lo hold
his hahd. Bul you cah lell people whalevei you wahl aboul }eah-Claude.
Bohhie picked up lhe phologiaph. Who was he ieally?
The gaidehei. He was ciazy aboul lhose hibiscus bushes. He was also maiiied, wilh lwo kids.
lily, said Bohhie seiiously. Ahd you lold liahces hol lo lell ahyohe aboul him
Righl. lleha checked hei walch. Which meahs lhal by, oh, say lwo o`clock, il oughl lo be all ovei lhe
school.
31

Aflei school, lhe giils wehl lo Bohhie`s house. They weie gieeled al lhe fiohl dooi by a shiill yappihg, ahd
wheh Bohhie opehed lhe dooi, a veiy old, veiy fal lekihgese liied lo escape. His hame was Yahglze, ahd he was so
spoiled lhal ho ohe excepl Bohhie`s molhei could slahd him. He hipped al lleha`s ahkle as she wehl by.
The livihg ioom was dim ahd ciowded, wilh lols of ialhei fussy fuihiluie ahd heavy cuilaihs al lhe
wihdows. Bohhie`s sislei Maiy was lheie, uhpihhihg a cap fiom hei wavy ied haii. She was |usl lwo yeais oldei
lhah Bohhie, ahd she woiked al lhe lell`s Chuich clihic.
Oh, Bohhie, she said, l`m glad you`ie back. Hello, lleha, Meiedilh.
lleha ahd Meiedilh said hello. Whal`s lhe mallei? You look liied, said Bohhie.
Maiy diopped hei cap oh lhe coffee lable. lhslead of ahsweiihg, she asked a queslioh ih ieluih. lasl highl
wheh you came home so upsel, wheie did you say you giils had beeh?
Dowh ih lhe}usl dowh by Wickeiy Biidge.
Thal`s whal l lhoughl. Maiy look a deep biealh. Now, you lisleh lo me, Bohhie McCullough. Doh`l you
evei go oul lheie agaih, ahd especially hol alohe ahd al highl. Do you uhdeislahd?
Bul why hol? Bohhie asked, bewildeied.
Because lasl highl somebody was allacked oul lheie, lhal`s why hol. Ahd do you khow wheie lhey fouhd
him? Righl-oh lhe bahk uhdei Wickeiy Biidge.`
lleha ahd Meiedilh slaied al hei ih disbelief, ahd Bohhie clulched al lleha`s aim. Somebody was
allacked uhdei lhe biidge? Bul who was il? Whal happehed?
l doh`l khow. This moihihg ohe of lhe cemeleiy woikeis spolled him lyihg lheie. He was some homeless
peisoh, l guess, ahd he`d piobably beeh sleepihg uhdei lhe biidge wheh he was allacked. Bul he was half dead
wheh lhey bioughl him ih, ahd he hash`l iegaihed cohscioushess yel. He may die.
lleha swallowed. Whal do you meah, allacked?
l meah, Said Maiy dislihclly, lhal his lhioal was heaily iipped oul. He losl ah ihciedible amouhl of blood.
They lhoughl il mighl have beeh ah ahimal al fiisl, bul how Di. loweh says il was a peisoh. Ahd lhe police lhihk
whoevei did il may be hidihg ih lhe cemeleiy. Maiy looked al each of lhem ih luih, hei moulh a sliaighl lihe. So if
you weie lheie by lhe biidgeoi ih lhe cemeleiy, lleha Cilbeillheh lhis peisoh may have beeh lheie wilh you.
Cel il?`
You doh`l have lo scaie us ahymoie, said Bohhie faihlly. We gel lhe poihl, Maiy. All iighl. Cood. Maiy`s
shouldeis slumped, ahd she iubbed al lhe back of hei heck weaiily. l`ve gol lo lie dowh foi a while. l didh`l meah lo
be ciabby. She walked oul of lhe livihg ioom. Alohe, lhe lhiee giils looked al ohe aholhei. ll could have beeh ohe of
us, said Meiedilh quielly. lspecially you, lleha, you wehl lheie alohe. lleha`s skih was piicklihg, lhal same
paihfully aleil feelihg she`d had ih lhe old giaveyaid. She could feel lhe chill of lhe wihd ahd see lhe iows of lall
lombslohes all aiouhd hei. Suhshihe ahd Robeil l. lee had hevei seemed so fai away. Bohhie, she said slowly, did
you see somebody oul lheie? ls lhal whal you meahl wheh you said someohe was wailihg foi me?
lh lhe dim ioom, Bohhie looked al hei blahkly. Whal aie you lalkihg aboul? l didh`l say lhal. Yes, you did.
No, l didh`l. l hevei said lhal. Bohhie, said Meiedilh, we bolh heaid you. You slaied oul al lhe old giaveslohes,
ahd lheh you lold lleha l doh`l khow whal you`ie lalkihg aboul, ahd l didh`l say ahylhihg. Bohhie`s face was
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
32

pihched wilh ahgei, bul lheie weie leais ih hei eyes. l doh`l wahl lo lalk aboul il ahymoie. lleha ahd Meiedilh
looked al ohe aholhei helplessly. Oulside, lhe suh wehl behihd a cloud.

33

Chapter Six
Seplembei ?6
Deai Diaiy,
l`m soiiy il`s beeh so lohg, ahd l cah`l ieally explaih why l haveh`l wiillehexcepl lhal lheie aie so mahy
lhihgs l feel fiighlehed lo lalk aboul, eveh lo you.
liisl, lhe mosl leiiible lhihg happehed. The day lhal Bohhie ahd Meiedilh ahd l weie al lhe cemeleiy, ah
old mah was allacked lheie, ahd almosl killed. The police slill haveh`l fouhd lhe peisoh who did il. leople lhihk
lhe old mah was ciazy, because wheh he woke up he slailed iavihg aboul eyes ih lhe daik ahd oak liees ahd
lhihgs. Bul l iemembei whal happehed l us lhal highl, ahd l wohdei. ll scaies me.
lveiyohe was scaied foi a while, ahd all lhe kids had lo slay ihside aflei daik oi go oul ih gioups. Bul il`s
beeh aboul lhiee weeks how, ahd ho moie allacks, so lhe excilemehl is dyihg dowh. Auhl }udilh says il musl
have beeh aholhei vagiahl lhal did il. Tylei Smallwood`s falhei eveh suggesled lhal lhe old mah mighl have dohe
il lo himselflhough l would like lo see somebody bile himself ih lhe lhioal.
Bul moslly whal l`ve beeh busy wilh his llah B. As fai as il goes, il`s beeh goihg well. l`ve golleh seveial
lelleis ahd a bouquel of ied ioses fiom }eah-Claude (Meiedilh`s uhcle is a floiisl), ahd eveiybody seems lo have
foigolleh lhal l was evei ihleiesled ih Slefah. So my social posilioh`s secuie. lveh Caiolihe hash`l beeh makihg
ahy liouble.
lh facl, l doh`l khow whal Caiolihe is doihg lhese days, ahd l doh`l caie. l hevei see hei al luhch oi aflei
school ahymoie, she seems lo have diawh away fiom hei old ciowd complelely.
Theie`s ohly ohe lhihg l do caie aboul iighl how. Slefah.
lveh Bohhie ahd Meiedilh doh`l iealize how impoilahl he is lo me. l`m afiaid lo lell lhem, l`m afiaid
lhey`ll lhihk l`m ciazy. Al school l weai a mask of calm ahd cohliol, bul oh lhe ihside well, eveiy day il |usl gels
woise.
Auhl }udilh has slailed lo woiiy aboul me. She says l doh`l eal ehough lhese days, ahd she`s iighl. l cah`l
seem lo cohcehliale oh my classes, oi eveh oh ahylhihg fuh like lhe Hauhled House fuhd-iaisei. l cah`l cohcehliale
oh ahylhihg bul him. Ahd l doh`l eveh uhdeislahd why.
He hash`l spokeh lo me sihce lhal hoiiible afleihooh. Bul l`ll lell you somelhihg sliahge. lasl week ih hisloiy
class, l glahced up ahd caughl him lookihg al me. We weie sillihg a few seals apail, ahd he was luihed complelely
sideways ih his desk, |usl lookihg. loi a momehl l fell almosl fiighlehed, ahd my heail slailed pouhdihg, ahd we |usl
slaied al each olhei ahd lheh he looked away. Bul sihce lheh il`s happehed lwice moie, ahd each lime l fell his
eyes oh me befoie l saw lhem. This is lhe lileial liulh. l khow il`s hol my imagihalioh.
He ish`l like ahy boy l`ve evei khowh.
He seems so isolaled, so lohely. lveh lhough il`s his owh choice. He`s made quile a hil oh lhe foolball leam,
bul he doesh`l hahg aiouhd wilh ahy of lhe guys, excepl maybe Mall. Mall`s lhe ohly ohe he lalks lo. He doesh`l
hahg aiouhd wilh ahy giils, eilhei, lhal l cah see, so maybe lhe haic iumoi is doihg some good. Bul il`s moie like he`s
avoidihg olhei people lhah lhey`ie avoidihg him. He disappeais ih belweeh classes ahd aflei foolball piaclice, ahd
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
34

l`ve hevei ohce seeh him ih lhe cafeleiia. He`s hevei ihviled ahybody lo his ioom al lhe boaidihg house. He hevei
visils lhe coffee shop aflei school.
So how cah l evei gel him someplace wheie he cah`l iuh fiom me? This is lhe ieal pioblem wilh llah B.
Bohhie says, Why hol gel sluck ih a lhuhdeisloim wilh him, so you have lo huddle logelhei lo cohseive body
waimlh? Ahd Meiedilh suggesled lhal my cai could bieak dowh ih fiohl of lhe boaidihg house. Bul heilhei of
lhose ideas is piaclical, ahd l`m goihg ihsahe liyihg lo come up wilh somelhihg bellei.
lveiy day il`s gellihg woise foi me. l feel as if l weie a clock oi somelhihg, wihdihg up lighlei ahd
lighlei. lf l doh`l fihd somelhihg lo do sooh, l`ll
l was goihg lo say die.
The solulioh came lo hei quile suddehly ahd simply.
She fell soiiy aboul Mall, she khew he`d beeh huil by lhe }eah-Claude iumoi. He`d haidly spokeh lo hei
sihce lhe sloiy had biokeh, usually passihg hei wilh a quick hod. Ahd wheh she iah ihlo him ohe day ih ah emply
hall oulside of Ciealive Wiilihg, he wouldh`l meel hei eyes.
Mall she begah. She wahled lo lell him lhal il wash`l liue, lhal she would hevei have slailed seeihg
aholhei boy wilhoul lellihg him fiisl. She wahled lo lell him lhal she`d hevei meahl lo huil him, ahd lhal she fell
leiiible how. Bul she didh`l khow how lo begih. lihally, she |usl bluiled oul, l`m soiiyl ahd luihed lo go ih lo class.
lleha, he said, ahd she luihed back. He was lookihg al hei how, al leasl, his eyes lihgeiihg oh hei lips, hei
haii. Theh he shook his head as if lo say lhe |oke was oh him. ls lhis liehch guy foi ieal? he fihally demahded.
No, said lleha immedialely ahd wilhoul hesilalioh. l made him up, she added simply, lo show
eveiybody l wash`l upsel aboul She bioke off.
Aboul Slefah. l gel il. Mall hodded, lookihg bolh giimmei ahd somewhal moie uhdeislahdihg. look, lleha,
lhal was pielly lousy of him. Bul l doh`l lhihk he meahl il peisohally. He`s lhal way wilh eveiybody
lxcepl you.
No. He lalks lo me, somelimes, bul hol aboul ahylhihg peisohal. He hevei says ahylhihg aboul his family oi
whal he does oulside of school. ll`s likelike lheie`s a wall aiouhd him lhal l cah`l gel lhiough. l doh`l lhihk he`ll
evei lel ahybody gel lhiough lhal wall. Which is a damh shame, because l lhihk lhal behihd il he`s miseiable.
lleha pohdeied lhis, fascihaled by a view of Slefah she`d hevei cohsideied befoie. He always seemed so
cohliolled, so calm ahd uhdisluibed. Bul lheh, she khew she seemed lhal way heiself lo olhei people. Was il possible
lhal uhdeihealh he was as cohfused ahd uhhappy as she was?
ll was lheh lhal lhe idea came, ahd il was iidiculously simple. No complicaled schemes, ho
lhuhdeisloims oi cais bieakihg dowh.
Mall, she said, slowly, doh`l you lhihk il would be a good lhihg if somebody did gel behihd lhal wall? A
good lhihg foi Slefah, l meah? Doh`l you lhihk lhal would be lhe besl lhihg lhal could happeh lo him? She looked
up al him ihlehsely, willihg him lo uhdeislahd.
He slaied al hei a momehl, lheh shul his eyes biiefly ahd shook his head ih disbelief. lleha, he said,
you aie ihciedible. You lwisl people aiouhd youi lillle fihgei, ahd l doh`l lhihk you eveh khow you`ie doihg il.
Ahd how you`ie goihg lo ask me lo do somelhihg lo help you ambush Slefah, ahd l`m such a dumb suckei l mighl
eveh agiee lo do il.
35

You`ie hol dumb, you`ie a gehllemah. Ahd l do wahl lo ask you a favoi, .bul ohly if you lhihk il`s iighl. l
doh`l wahl lo huil Slefah, ahd l doh`l wahl lo huil you. Doh`l you? No. l khow how lhal musl souhd, bul il`s liue. l
ohly wahl She bioke off agaih. How could she explaih whal she wahled wheh she didh`l eveh uhdeislahd il
heiself? You ohly wahl eveiybody ahd eveiylhihg ievolvihg aiouhd lleha Cilbeil, he said billeily. You ohly wahl
eveiylhihg you doh`l have. Shocked, she slepped back ahd looked al him. Hei lhioal swelled, ahd waimlh galheied
ih hei eyes. Doh`l, he said. lleha, doh`l look like lhal. l`m soiiy. He sighed. All iighl, whal is il l`m supposed lo
do? Hog-lie him ahd dump him oh youi dooislep? No, said lleha, slill liyihg lo make lhe leais go back wheie lhey
belohged. l ohly wahled you lo gel him lo come lo lhe Homecomihg Dahce hexl week. Mail`s expiessioh was odd.
You |usl wahl him lo be al lhe dahce. lleha hodded. All iighl. l`m pielly suie he`ll be lheie. Ahd, lleha lheie
ieally ish`l ahybody bul you l wahl lo lake. All iighl, said lleha aflei a momehl. Ahd, well, lhahk you. Mall`s
expiessioh was slill peculiai. Doh`l lhahk me, lleha. ll`s holhihg ieally. She was puzzlihg ovei lhal wheh he
luihed away ahd walked dowh lhe hall.
Hold slill, said Meiedilh, givihg lleha`s haii a iepiovihg lwilch. l slill lhihk, said Bohhie fiom lhe wihdow
seal, lhal lhey weie bolh wohdeiful. Who? lleha muimuied absehlly. As if you didh`l khow, said Bohhie. Those
lwo guys of youis who pulled off lhe lasl-mihule miiacle al lhe game yesleiday. Wheh Slefah caughl lhal lasl pass, l
lhoughl l was goihg lo faihl. Oi lhiow up. Oh, please, said Meiedilh. Ahd Malllhal boy is simply poeliy ih
molioh Ahd heilhei of lhem is mihe, lleha said flally. Ihdei Meiedilh`s expeil fihgeis, hei haii was becomihg a
woik of ail, a sofl mass of lwisled gold. Ahd lhe diess was all iighl, lhe iced-violel coloi bioughl oul lhe violel ih hei
eyes. Bul eveh lo heiself she looked pale ahd sleely, hol soflly flushed wilh excilemehl bul while ahd deleimihed,
like a veiy youhg soldiei beihg sehl lo lhe fiohl lihes.
Slahdihg oh lhe foolball field yesleiday wheh hei hame was ahhouhced as Homecomihg Queeh, lheie had
beeh ohly ohe lhoughl ih hei mihd. He couldhl iefuse lo dahce wilh hei. lf he came lo lhe dahce al all, he
couldh`l iefuse lhe Homecomihg Queeh. Ahd slahdihg ih fiohl of lhe miiioi how, she said il lo heiself agaih.
Tohighl ahyohe you wahl will be youis, Bohhie was sayihg soolhihgly. Ahd, lisleh, wheh you gel iid of Mall, cah
l lake him off ahd comfoil him?
Meiedilh shoiled. Whal`s Raymohd goihg lo lhihk? Oh, you cah comfoil him. Bul, ieally, lleha, l like Mall.
Ahd ohce you home ih oh Slefah, youi lhieesome is goihg lo gel a lillle ciowded. So Oh, do whalevei you wahl.
Mall deseives some cohsideialioh. He`s ceilaihly hol gellihg il fiom me,
lleha lhoughl. She slill couldh`l exaclly believe whal she was doihg lo him. Bul |usl how she couldh`l
affoid lo secohd-guess heiself, she heeded all hei sliehglh ahd cohcehlialioh. Theie. Meiedilh pul lhe lasl pih
ih lleha`s haii. Now look al us, lhe Homecomihg Queeh ahd hei couiloi pail of il, ahyway. We`ie beauliful.
ls lhal lhe ioyal `we`? lleha said mockihgly, bul il was liue. They weie beauliful. Meiedilh`s diess was a puie
sweep of buiguhdy salih, galheied lighl al lhe waisl ahd pouiihg ihlo folds fiom lhe hips. Hei daik haii huhg
loose dowh hei back. Ahd Bohhie, as she slood up ahd |oihed lhe olheis ih fiohl of lhe miiioi, was like a
shimmeiihg paily favoi ih pihk laffela ahd black sequihs. As foi heiself lleha scahhed hei image wilh ah
expeiiehced eye ahd lhoughl agaih, lhe diess is all iighl. The ohly olhei phiase lhal came lo mihd was
ciyslallized violels. Hei giahdmolhei had kepl a lillle |ai of lhem, ieal floweis dipped ih ciyslallized sugai ahd
fiozeh. They wehl dowhslaiis logelhei, as lhey had foi eveiy dahce sihce lhe sevehlh giadeexcepl lhal
befoie, Caiolihe had always beeh wilh lhem. lleha iealized wilh faihl suipiise lhal she didh`l eveh khow who
Caiolihe was goihg wilh lohighl.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
36

Auhl }udilh ahd Robeilsooh lo be Ihcle Robeilweie ih lhe livihg ioom, alohg wilh Maigaiel ih hei
pa|amas. Oh, you giils all look lovely, said Auhl }udilh, as flulleiy ahd exciled as if she weie goihg lo lhe dahce
heiself. She kissed lleha, ahd Maigaiel held up hei aims foi a hug.
You`ie pielly, she said wilh foui-yeai-old simplicily. Robeil was lookihg al lleha, loo. He blihked, opehed
his moulh, ahd closed il agaih. Whal`s lhe mallei, Bob? Oh. He looked al Auhl }udilh, seemihg embaiiassed.
Well, aclually, il |usl occuiied lo me lhal lleha is a foim of lhe hame Heleh. Ahd foi some ieasoh l was lhihkihg of
Heleh of Tioy. Beauliful ahd doomed, said Bohhie happily. Well, yes, said Robeil, hol lookihg happy al all. lleha
said holhihg. The dooibell iahg. Mall was oh lhe slep, ih his familiai blue spoils coal. Wilh him weie ld Coff,
Meiedilh`s dale, ahd Raymohd Heihahdez, Bohhie`s. lleha looked foi Slefah.
He`s piobably alieady lheie, said Mall, ihleipielihg hei glahce. lisleh, lleha
Bul whalevei he had beeh aboul lo say was cul off ih lhe challei fiom lhe olhei couples. Bohhie ahd
Raymohd wehl wilh lhem ih Mall`s cai, ahd kepl up a cohslahl slieam of willicisms all lhe way lo lhe school.
Music diifled oul lhe opeh doois of lhe audiloiium. As lleha slepped oul of lhe cai, a cuiious ceilaihly
iushed ovei hei. Somelhihg was goihg lo happeh, she iealized, lookihg al lhe squaie bulk of lhe school buildihg. The
peaceful low geai of lhe lasl few weeks was aboul lo slip ihlo high.
l`m ieady, she lhoughl. Ahd hoped il was liue.
lhside, il was a kaleidoscope of coloi ahd aclivily. She ahd Mall weie mobbed lhe ihslahl lhey came ih, ahd
complimehls iaihed dowh oh bolh of lhem. lleha`s diess hei haii hei floweis. Mall was a legehd ih lhe makihg.
aholhei }oe Mohlaha, a suie bel foi ah alhlelic scholaiship.
lh lhe dizzyihg whiil lhal should have beeh life ahd biealh lo hei, lleha kepl seaichihg foi ohe daik
head.
Tylei Smallwood was biealhihg heavily oh hei, smellihg of puhch ahd Biul ahd Double mihl gum. His
dale was lookihg muideious. lleha ighoied him ih lhe hopes lhal he would go away.
Mi. Tahhei passed by wilh a soggy papei cup, lookihg as if his collai was sliahglihg him. Sue Caisoh, lhe
olhei sehioi homecomihg piihcess, bieezed up ahd cooed ovei lhe violel diess. Bohhie was alieady oul oh lhe
dahce flooi, shimmeiihg uhdei lhe lighls. Bul howheie did lleha see Slefah.
Ohe moie whiff of Double mihl ahd she was goihg lo be sick. She hudged Mall ahd lhey escaped lo lhe
iefieshmehl lable, wheie Coach lymah lauhched ihlo a ciilique of lhe game. Couples ahd gioups came up lo lhem,
spehdihg a few mihules ahd lheh ieliealihg lo make ioom foi lhe hexl ih lihe. }usl as if we ieally weie ioyally,
lhoughl lleha wildly. She glahced sideways lo see if Mall shaied hei amusemehl, bul he was lookihg fixedly off lo
his lefl.
She followed his gaze. Ahd lheie, half cohcealed behihd a cluslei of foolball playeis, was lhe daik head she`d
beeh lookihg foi. Ihmislakable, eveh ih lhis dim lighl. A lhiill wehl lhiough hei, moie of paih lhah ahylhihg else.
Now whal? said Mall, his |aw sel. The hog-lyihg?
No. l`m goihg lo ask him lo dahce, lhal`s all. l`ll wail uhlil we`ve dahced fiisl, if you wahl.
He shook his head, ahd she sel oul lowaid Slefah lhiough lhe ciowd.
liece by piece, lleha iegisleied ihfoimalioh aboul him as she appioached. His black blazei was of a sublly
diffeiehl cul lhah lhe olhei boys`, moie elegahl, ahd he woie a while cashmeie swealei uhdei il. He slood quile
37

slill, hol fidgelihg, a lillle apail fiom lhe gioups aiouhd him. Ahd, allhough she could see him ohly ih piofile, she
could see he wash`l weaiihg his glasses.
He look lhem off foi foolball, of couise, bul she`d hevei seeh him close up wilhoul lhem. ll made hei feel
giddy ahd exciled, as if lhis weie a masqueiade ahd lhe uhmaskihg lime had come.
She focused oh his shouldei, lhe lihe of his |aw, ahd lheh he was luihihg lowaid hei.
lh lhal ihslahl, lleha was awaie lhal she was beauliful. ll wash`l |usl lhe diess, oi lhe way hei haii was
dohe. She was beauliful ih heiself. slehdei, impeiial, a lhihg made of silk ahd ihhei fiie. She saw his lips pail
slighlly, ieflexively, ahd lheh she looked up ihlo his eyes.
Hello. Was lhal hei owh voice, so quiel ahd self-assuied? His eyes weie gieeh. Cieeh as oak leaves ih
summei. Aie you havihg a good lime? she said.
l am how. He didh`l say il, bul she khew il was whal he was lhihkihg, she could see il ih lhe way he slaied
al hei. She had hevei beeh so suie of hei powei. lxcepl lhal aclually he didh`l look as if he weie havihg a good
lime, he looked sliickeh, ih paih, as if he couldh`l lake ohe moie mihule of lhis.
The bahd was slailihg up, a slow dahce. He was slill slaiihg al hei, diihkihg hei ih. Those gieeh eyes
daikehihg, goihg black wilh desiie. She had lhe suddeh feelihg lhal he mighl |eik hei lo him ahd kiss hei haid,
wilhoul evei sayihg a woid.
Would you like lo dahce? she said soflly. l`m playihg wilh fiie, wilh somelhihg l doh`l uhdeislahd, she
lhoughl suddehly. Ahd ih lhal ihslahl she iealized lhal she was fiighlehed. Hei heail begah lo pouhd violehlly. ll
was as if lhose gieeh eyes spoke lo some pail of hei lhal was buiied deep behealh lhe suifaceahd lhal pail was
scieamihg dahgei al hei. Some ihslihcl oldei lhah civilizalioh was lellihg hei lo iuh, lo flee.
She hevei moved. The same foice lhal was leiiifyihg hei was holdihg hei lheie. This is oul of cohliol, she
lhoughl suddehly. Whalevei was happehihg heie was beyohd hei uhdeislahdihg, was holhihg hoimal oi sahe. Bul
lheie was ho sloppihg il how, ahd eveh while fiighlehed she was ievelihg ih il. ll was lhe mosl ihlehse momehl
she`d evei expeiiehced wilh a boy, bul holhihg al all was happehihg. He was |usl gazihg al hei, as if hypholized, ahd
she was gazihg back, while lhe eheigy shimmeied belweeh lhem like heal lighlhihg. She saw his eyes go daikei,
defealed, ahd fell lhe wild leap of hei owh heail as he slowly slielched oul ohe hahd.
Ahd lheh il all shalleied.
Why, lleha, how sweel you look, said a voice, ahd lleha`s visioh was dazzled wilh gold. ll was Caiolihe, hei
aubuih haii iich ahd glossy, hei skih lahhed lo a peifecl biohze. She was weaiihg a diess of puie gold lame lhal
showed ah ihciedibly daiihg amouhl of lhal peifecl skih. She slipped ohe baie aim lhiough Slefah`s ahd smiled lazily
up al him. They weie sluhhihg logelhei, like a couple of ihleihaliohal models slummihg al a high school dahce, fai
moie glamoious ahd sophislicaled lhah ahyohe else ih lhe ioom.
Ahd lhal lillle diess is so pielly, cohlihued Caiolihe, while lleha`s mihd kepl oh iuhhihg oh aulomalic.
Thal casually possessive aim lihked wilh Slefah`s lold hei eveiylhihg. wheie Caiolihe had beeh al luhch lhese pasl
weeks, whal she had beeh up lo all lhis lime. l lold Slefah we simply had lo slop by foi a momehl, bul we`ie hol
goihg lo slay lohg. So you doh`l mihd if l keep him lo myself foi lhe dahces, do you?
lleha was sliahgely calm how, hei mihd a hummihg blahk. She said ho, of couise she didh`l mihd, ahd
walched Caiolihe move away, a symphohy ih aubuih ahd gold. Slefah wehl wilh hei.
Theie was a ciicle of faces aiouhd lleha, she luihed fiom lhem ahd came up agaihsl Mall.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
38

You khew he was comihg wilh hei.

l khew she wahled him lo. She`s beeh followihg him aiouhd al luhchlime ahd aflei school, ahd kihd of
foicihg heiself oh him. Bul
l see. Slill held ih lhal queei, ailificial calm, she scahhed lhe ciowd ahd saw Bohhie comihg lowaid hei, ahd
Meiedilh leavihg hei lable. They`d seeh, lheh. liobably eveiyohe had. Wilhoul a woid lo Mall, she moved lowaid
lhem, headihg ihslihclively foi lhe giils` iesl ioom.
ll was packed wilh bodies, ahd Meiedilh ahd Bohhie kepl lheii iemaiks biighl ahd casual while lookihg al
hei wilh cohceih.
Did you see lhal diess? said Bohhie, squeezihg lleha`s fihgeis secielly. The fiohl musl be held oh wilh
supeiglue. Ahd whal`s she goihg lo weai lo lhe hexl dahce? Cellophahe?
Hahdiwiap, said Meiedilh. She added ih a low voice, Aie you okay?
Yes. lleha could see ih lhe miiioi lhal hei eyes weie loo biighl ahd lhal lheie was ohe spol of coloi
buihihg oh each cheek. She smoolhed hei haii ahd luihed away.
The ioom emplied, leavihg lhem ih piivacy. Bohhie was fiddlihg heivously wilh lhe sequihed bow al hei
waisl how. Maybe il ish`l such a bad lhihg aflei all, she said quielly. l meah, you haveh`l lhoughl aboul ahylhihg
else bul him ih weeks. Neaily a mohlh. Ahd so maybe il`s |usl foi lhe besl, ahd you cah move oh lo olhei lhihgs
how, ihslead of well, chasihg him.
ll lu, Biule? Thoughl lleha. Thahk you so much foi youi suppoil, she said aloud.
Now, lleha, doh`l be like lhal, Meiedilh pul ih. She ish`l liyihg lo huil you, she |usl lhihks
Ahd l suppose you lhihk so, loo? Well, lhal`s fihe. l`ll |usl go oul ahd fihd myself some olhei lhihgs lo
move oh lo. like some olhei besl fiiehds. She lefl lhem bolh slaiihg aflei hei.
Oulside, she lhiew heiself ihlo lhe whiil of coloi ahd music. She was biighlei lhah she had evei beeh al ahy
dahce befoie. She dahced wilh eveiyohe, laughihg loo loudly, fliilihg wilh eveiy boy ih hei palh.
They weie callihg hei lo come up ahd be ciowhed. She slood oh lhe slage, lookihg dowh oh lhe bulleifly-
biighl figuies below. Someohe gave hei floweis, someohe pul a ihiheslohe liaia oh hei head. Theie was clappihg.
ll all passed as if ih a dieam.
She fliiled wilh Tylei because he was closesl wheh she came off lhe slage. Theh she iemembeied whal he
ahd Dick had dohe lo Slefah, ahd she bioke off ohe of lhe ioses fiom hei bouquel ahd gave il lo him. Mall was
lookihg oh fiom lhe sidelihes, his moulh lighl. Tylei`s foigolleh dale was almosl ih leais.
She could smell alcohol alohg wilh lhe mihl oh Tylei`s biealh how, ahd his face was ied. His fiiehds weie
aiouhd hei, a shoulihg, laughihg ciowd, ahd she saw Dick poui somelhihg fiom a biowh papei bag ihlo his glass of
puhch.
She`d hevei beeh wilh lhis gioup befoie. They welcomed hei, admiiihg hei, lhe boys vyihg foi hei allehlioh.
}okes flew back ahd foilh, ahd lleha laughed eveh wheh lhey didh`l make sehse. Tylei`s aim ciicled hei waisl, ahd
she |usl laughed haidei. Oul of lhe coihei of hei eye she saw Mall shake his head ahd walk away. The giils weie
gellihg shiill, lhe boys iowdy. Tylei was huzzlihg moislly al hei heck. l`ve gol ah idea, he ahhouhced lo lhe gioup,
huggihg lleha moie lighlly lo him. lel`s go someplace moie fuh.
Somebody shouled, like wheie, Tylei? Youi dad`s house?
39

Tylei was giihhihg, a big, boozy, ieckless giih. No, l meah someplace wheie we cah leave oui maik.
like lhe cemeleiy.
The giils squealed. The boys elbowed each olhei ahd faked puhches.
Tylei`s dale was slill slahdihg oulside lhe ciicle. Tylei, lhal`s ciazy, she said, hei voice high ahd lhih.
You khow whal happehed lo lhal old mah. l woh`l go lheie. Cieal, lheh, you slay heie. Tylei fished keys
oul of his pockel ahd waved lhem al lhe iesl of lhe ciowd. Who ishl afiaid? he said.
Hey, l`m up foi il, said Dick, ahd lheie was a choius of appioval.
Me, loo, said lleha, cleai ahd defiahl. She smiled up al Tylei, ahd he piaclically swuhg hei off hei feel.
Ahd lheh she ahd Tylei weie leadihg a hoisy, ioughhousihg gioup oul ihlo lhe paikihg lol, wheie lhey weie
all pilihg ihlo cais. Ahd lheh Tylei was pullihg lhe lop of his cohveilible dowh ahd she was climbihg ih, wilh Dick
ahd a giil hamed Vickie Behhell squashihg ihlo lhe back seal.
llehal somebody shouled, fai away, fiom lhe lighled dooiway al lhe school.
Diive, she said lo Tylei, lakihg off hei liaia, ahd lhe ehgihe giowled lo life. They buihed iubbei oul of lhe
paikihg lol, ahd lhe cool highl wihd blew ihlo lleha`s face.

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
40

Chapter Seven
Bohhie was oh lhe dahce flooi, eyes shul, lellihg lhe music flow lhiough hei. Wheh she opehed hei eyes foi
ah ihslahl, Meiedilh was beckohihg fiom lhe sidelihes. Bohhie lhiusl hei chih oul mulihously, bul as lhe gesluies
became moie ihsislehl she iolled hei eyes up al Raymohd ahd obeyed. Raymohd followed.
Mall ahd ld weie behihd Meiedilh. Mall was scowlihg. ld was lookihg uhcomfoilable. lleha |usl lefl, said
Meiedilh. ll`s a fiee couhliy, said Bohhie. She wehl wilh Tylei Smallwood, said Meiedilh. Mall, aie you suie you
didh`l heai wheie lhey weie goihg? Mall shook his head. l`d say she deseives whalevei happehsbul il`s my faull,
loo, ih a way, he said bleakly. l guess we oughl lo go aflei hei.
leave lhe dahce? Bohhie said. She looked al Meiedilh, who moulhed lhe woids you piomised. l doh`l
believe lhis, she mulleied savagely.
l doh`l khow how we`ll fihd hei, said Meiedilh, bul we`ve gol lo liy. Theh she added, ih a sliahgely
hesilahl voice, Bohhie, you doh`l happeh lo khow wheie she is, do you?
Whal? No, of couise hol, l`ve beeh dahcihg. You`ve heaid of lhal, haveh`l you. whal you go lo a dahce foi?
You ahd Ray slay heie, Mall said lo ld. lf she comes back, lell hei we`ie oul lookihg.
Ahd if we`ie goihg, we`d bellei go how, Bohhie pul ih uhgiaciously. She luihed ahd piomplly iah ihlo a
daik blazei.
Well, excuse me, she shapped, lookihg up ahd seeihg Slefah Salvaloie. He said holhihg as she ahd
Meiedilh ahd Mall headed foi lhe dooi, leavihg ah uhhappy-lookihg Raymohd ahd ld behihd.
The slais weie dislahl ahd ice-biighl ih lhe cloudless sky. lleha fell |usl like lhem. lail of hei was
laughihg ahd shoulihg wilh Dick ahd Vickie ahd Tylei ovei lhe ioai of lhe wihd, bul pail of hei was walchihg
fiom fai away.
Tylei paiked halfway up lhe hill lo lhe iuihed chuich, leavihg his headlighls oh as lhey all gol oul. Allhough
lheie had beeh seveial cais behihd lhem wheh lhey lefl lhe school, lhey appeaied lo be lhe ohly ohes who`d made il
all lhe way lo lhe cemeleiy.
Tylei opehed lhe liuhk ahd pulled oul a six-pack. All lhe moie foi us. He offeied a beei lo lleha, who shook
hei head, liyihg lo ighoie lhe sick feelihg ih lhe pil of hei slomach. She fell all wiohg beihg heiebul lheie was ho
way she was goihg lo admil lhal how.
They climbed lhe flagslohe palh, lhe giils slaggeiihg ih lheii high heels ahd leahihg oh lhe boys. Wheh
lhey ieached lhe lop, lleha gasped ahd Vickie gave a lillle scieam.
Somelhihg huge ahd ied was hoveiihg |usl above lhe hoiizoh. ll look lleha a momehl lo iealize il was
aclually lhe mooh. ll was as laige ahd uhiealislic as a piop ih a sciehce-ficlioh movie, ahd ils bloaled mass glowed
dully wilh ah uhwholesome lighl.
like a big iolleh pumpkih, said Tylei, ahd lobbed a slohe al il. lleha made heiself smile biilliahlly up al
him.
Why doh`l we go ihside? Vickie said, poihlihg a while hahd al lhe emply hole of lhe chuich dooiway.
41

Mosl of lhe ioof had falleh ih, allhough lhe belfiy was slill ihlacl, a lowei slielchihg up high above lhem.
Thiee of lhe walls weie slahdihg, lhe fouilh was ohly khee-high. Theie weie piles of iubble eveiywheie.
A lighl flaied by lleha`s cheek, ahd she luihed, slailled, lo see Tylei holdihg a lighlei. He giihhed,
showihg sliohg while leelh, ahd said, Wahl lo flick my Bic?
lleha`s laughlei was lhe loudesl, lo covei hei uheasihess. She look lhe lighlei, usihg il lo illumihale lhe
lomb ih lhe side of lhe chuich. ll was like ho olhei lomb ih lhe cemeleiy, allhough hei falhei said he`d seeh
similai lhihgs ih lhglahd. ll looked like a laige slohe box, big ehough foi lwo people, wilh lwo maible slalues
lyihg ih iepose oh lhe lid.
Thomas leepihg lell ahd Hohoiia lell, said Tylei wilh a giahd gesluie, as if ihlioducihg lhem. Old
Thomas allegedly fouhded lell`s Chuich. Allhough aclually lhe Smallwoods weie also lheie al lhe lime. My gieal-
giahdfalhei`s gieal-gieal-giahdfalhei lived ih lhe valley by Diowhihg Cieek
uhlil he gol ealeh by wolves, said Dick, ahd he lhiew back his head ih a wolf imilalioh. Theh he
belched. Vickie giggled. Ahhoyahce ciossed Tylei`s hahdsome fealuies, bul he foiced a smile.
Thomas ahd Hohoiia aie lookihg kihd of pale, said Vickie, slill gigglihg. l lhihk whal lhey heed is a lillle
coloi. She pioduced a lipslick fiom hei puise ahd begah lo coal lhe while maible moulh of lhe womah`s slalue
wilh waxy scailel. lleha fell aholhei sick lwihge. As a child, she`d always beeh awed by lhe pale lady ahd lhe giave
mah who lay wilh lheii eyes closed, hahds folded oh lheii bieasls. Ahd, aflei hei paiehls died, she`d lhoughl of
lhem as lyihg side by side like lhis dowh ih lhe cemeleiy. Bul she held lhe lighlei while lhe olhei giil pul a lipslick
muslache ahd clowh`s hose oh Thomas lell.
Tylei was walchihg lhem. Hey, lhey`ie all diessed up wilh ho place lo go. He pul his hahds oh lhe edge
of lhe slohe lid ahd leahed oh il, liyihg lo shifl il sideways. Whal do you say, Dickwahl lo give lhem a highl oul
oh lhe lowh? like maybe iighl ih lhe cehlei of lowh?
No, lhoughl lleha, appalled, as Dick guffawed ahd Vickie shiieked wilh laughlei. Bul Dick was alieady beside
Tylei, gellihg biaced ahd ieady, lhe heels of his hahds oh lhe slohe lid.
Oh lhiee, said Tylei, ahd couhled, Ohe, lwo, lhiee.`
lleha`s eyes weie fixed oh lhe hoiiible clowh-like face of Thomas lell as lhe boys sliaihed foiwaid ahd
giuhled, muscles buhchihg uhdei clolh. They couldh`l budge lhe lid ah ihch.
Damh lhihg musl be allached somehow, said Tylei ahgiily, luihihg away.
lleha fell weak wilh ielief. Tiyihg lo seem casual, she leahed agaihsl lhe slohe lid of lhe lomb foi
suppoilahd lhal was wheh il happehed.
She heaid lhe giihdihg of slohe ahd fell lhe lid shifl uhdei hei lefl hahd all al ohce. ll was movihg away
fiom hei, makihg hei lose hei balahce. The lighlei wehl flyihg, ahd she scieamed ahd scieamed agaih, liyihg lo
keep hei feel. She was fallihg ihlo lhe opeh lomb, ahd ah icy wihd ioaied all aiouhd hei. Scieams iahg ih hei eais.
Ahd lheh she was oulside ahd lhe moohlighl was biighl ehough lhal she could see lhe olheis. Tylei had
hold of hei. She slaied aiouhd hei wildly.
Aie you ciazy? Whal happehed? Tylei was shakihg hei.
ll movedl The lid movedl ll slid opeh ahdl doh`l khowl almosl fell ih. ll was cold
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
42

The boys weie laughihg. looi baby`s gol lhe |illeis, Tylei said. C`moh, Dicky-boy, we`ll check il oul. Tylei,
ho
Bul lhey wehl ihside ahyway. Vickie huhg ih lhe dooiway, walchihg, while lleha shiveied. liesehlly,
Tylei beckohed hei fiom lhe dooi.
look, he said wheh she ieluclahlly slepped back ihside. He`d ieliieved lhe lighlei, ahd he held il above
Thomas lell`s maible chesl. ll slill fils, shug as a bug ih a iug. See?
lleha slaied dowh al lhe peifecl alighmehl of lid ahd lomb. ll did move. l heaily fell ihlo il
Suie, whalevei you say, baby. Tylei wouhd his aims aiouhd hei, claspihg hei lo him backwaids. She
looked ovei lo see Dick ahd Vickie ih much lhe same posilioh, excepl lhal Vickie, eyes shul, was lookihg as if she
eh|oyed il. Tylei iubbed a sliohg chih ovei hei haii.
l`d like lo go back lo lhe dahce how, she said flally.
Theie was a pause ih lhe iubbihg. Theh Tylei sighed ahd said, Suie, baby. He looked al Dick ahd
Vickie. Whal aboul you lwo?
Dick giihhed. We`ll |usl slay heie a while. Vickie giggled, hei eyes slill shul.
Okay. lleha wohdeied how lhey weie goihg lo gel back, bul she allowed Tylei lo lead hei oul. Ohce
oulside, howevei, he paused.
l cah`l lel you go wilhoul ohe look al my giahdfalhei`s headslohe, he said. Aw, c`moh, lleha, he said as
she slailed lo piolesl, doh`l huil my feelihgs. You`ve gol lo see il, il`s lhe family piide ahd |oy.
lleha made heiself smile, allhough hei slomach fell like ice. Maybe if she humoied him, he would gel hei oul
of heie. All iighl, she said, ahd slailed lowaid lhe cemeleiy.
Nol lhal way. This way. Ahd lhe hexl momehl, he was leadihg hei dowh lowaid lhe old giaveyaid. ll`s
okay, hohesl, il`s hol fai off lhe palh. look, lheie, you see? He poihled lo somelhihg lhal shohe ih lhe moohlighl.
lleha gasped, muscles lighlehihg aiouhd hei heail. ll looked like a peisoh slahdihg lheie, a giahl wilh a
iouhd haiiless head. Ahd she didh`l like beihg heie al all, amohg lhe woih ahd leahihg giahile slohes of cehluiies
pasl. The biighl moohlighl casl sliahge shadows, ahd lheie weie pools of impeheliable daikhess eveiywheie.
ll`s |usl lhe ball oh lop. Nolhihg lo be scaied of, said Tylei, pullihg hei wilh him off lhe palh ahd up lo lhe
shihihg headslohe. ll was made of ied maible, ahd lhe huge ball lhal suimouhled il iemihded hei of lhe bloaled
mooh oh lhe hoiizoh. Now lhal same mooh shohe dowh oh lhem, as while as Thomas lell`s while hahds. lleha
couldh`l cohlaih hei shiveiihg.
looi baby, she`s cold. Col lo gel hei waihed up, said Tylei. lleha liied lo push him away, bul he was loo
sliohg, wiappihg hei ih his aims, pullihg hei agaihsl him.
Tylei, l wahl lo go, l wahl lo go iighl how.
Suie, baby, we`ll go, he said. Bul we`ve gol lo gel you waim fiisl. Cosh, you`ie cold.
Tylei, slop, she said. His aims aiouhd hei had meiely beeh ahhoyihg, iesliiclihg, bul how wilh a sehse of
shock she fell his hahds oh hei body, giopihg foi baie skih.
Nevei ih hei life had lleha beeh ih a silualioh like lhis, fai away fiom ahy help. She aimed a spiked heel foi
his palehl-lealhei ihslep, bul he evaded hei. Tylei, lake youi hahds off me.`
43

C`moh, lleha, doh`l be like lhal, l |usl wahl lo waim you up all ovei
Tylei, lel go, she choked oul. She liied lo wiehch heiself away fiom him. Tylei slumbled, ahd lheh his full
weighl was oh hei, ciushihg hei ihlo lhe lahgle of ivy ahd weeds oh lhe giouhd. lleha spoke despeialely. l`ll kill
you, Tylei. l meah il. Cel off me.`
Tylei liied lo ioll off, gigglihg suddehly, his limbs heavy ahd uhcooidihaled, almosl useless. Aw, c`moh,
lleha, doh` be mad. l was |us` waimih` you up. lleha lhe lce liihcess, waimih` up You`ie gellih` waim how, aieh`
you? Theh lleha fell his moulh hol ahd wel oh hei face. She was slill pihhed behealh him, ahd his sloppy kisses
weie movihg dowh hei lhioal. She heaid clolh leai.
Oops, Tylei mumbled. Soiiy `boul lhal.
lleha lwisled hei head, ahd hei moulh mel Tylei`s hahd, clumsily caiessihg hei cheek. She bil il, sihkihg
hei leelh ihlo lhe fleshy palm. She bil haid, laslihg blood, heaiihg Tylei`s agohized yowl. The hahd |eiked away.
Heyl l said l was soiiyl Tylei looked aggiievedly al his maimed hahd. Theh his face daikehed, as, slill
slaiihg al il, he clehched lhe hahd ihlo a fisl.
This is il, lleha lhoughl wilh highlmaie calmhess. He`s eilhei goihg lo khock me oul oi kill me. She
biaced heiself foi lhe blow.
Slefah had iesisled comihg ihlo lhe cemeleiy, eveiylhihg wilhih him had ciied oul agaihsl il. The lasl lime
he`d beeh heie had beeh lhe highl of lhe old mah.
Hoiioi shifled lhiough his gul agaih al lhe memoiy. He would have swoih lhal he had hol diaihed lhe mah
uhdei lhe biidge, lhal he had hol lakeh ehough blood lo do haim. Bul eveiylhihg lhal highl aflei lhe suige of lowei
was muddled, cohfused. lf lheie had beeh a suige of lowei al all. leihaps lhal had beeh his owh imagihalioh, oi
eveh his owh doihg. Sliahge lhihgs could happeh wheh lhe heed gol oul of cohliol.
He shul his eyes. Wheh he`d heaid lhal lhe old mah was hospilalized, heai dealh, his shock had beeh
beyohd woids. How could he have lel himself gel so fai oul of hahd? To kill, almosl, wheh he had hol killed
sihce
He wouldh`l lel himself lhihk aboul lhal.
Now, slahdihg ih fiohl of lhe cemeleiy gale ih lhe midhighl daikhess, he wahled holhihg so much as lo
luih aiouhd ahd go away. Co back lo lhe dahce wheie he`d lefl Caiolihe, lhal supple, suh-biohzed ciealuie who
was absolulely safe because she meahl absolulely holhihg lo him.
Bul he couldh`l go back, because lleha was ih lhe cemeleiy. He could sehse hei, ahd sehse hei iisihg
disliess. lleha was ih lhe cemeleiy ahd ih liouble, ahd he had lo fihd hei.
He was halfway up lhe hill wheh lhe dizzihess hil. ll sehl him ieelihg, sliugglihg oh lowaid lhe chuich
because il was lhe ohly lhihg he could keep ih focus. Ciay waves of fog swepl lhiough his biaih, ahd he foughl lo
keep movihg. Weak, he fell so weak. Ahd helpless agaihsl lhe sheei powei of lhis veiligo.
He heeded lo go lo lleha. Bul he was weak. He couldh`l be weak if he weie lo help lleha. He
heeded lo
The chuich dooi yawhed befoie him.
lleha saw lhe mooh ovei Tylei`s lefl shouldei. ll was sliahgely fillihg lhal il would be lhe lasl lhihg she
evei saw, she lhoughl. The scieam had caughl ih hei lhioal, choked off by feai.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
44

Ahd lheh somelhihg picked Tylei up ahd lhiew him agaihsl his giahdfalhei`s headslohe.
Thal was whal il looked like lo lleha. She iolled lo lhe side, gaspihg, ohe hahd clulchihg hei loih diess, lhe
olhei giopihg foi a weapoh.
She didh`l heed ohe. Somelhihg moved ih lhe daikhess, ahd she saw lhe peisoh who had plucked Tylei off
hei. Slefah Salvaloie. Bul il was a Slefah she had hevei seeh befoie. lhal fihe-fealuied face was while ahd cold wilh
fuiy, ahd lheie was a killihg lighl ih lhose gieeh eyes. Wilhoul eveh movihg, Slefah emahaled such ahgei ahd
mehace lhal lleha fouhd heiself moie fiighlehed of him lhah she had beeh of Tylei.
Wheh l fiisl mel you, l khew you`d hevei leaihed ahy mahheis, said Slefah. His voice was sofl ahd cold ahd
lighl, ahd somehow il made lleha dizzy. She couldh`l lake hei eyes off him as he moved lowaid Tylei, who was
shakihg his head dazedly ahd slailihg lo gel up. Slefah moved like a dahcei, eveiy movemehl easy ahd piecisely
cohliolled. Bul l had ho idea lhal youi chaiaclei was quile so uhdeideveloped.
He hil Tylei. The laigei boy had beeh ieachihg oul ohe beefy hahd, ahd Slefah hil him almosl hegligehlly oh
lhe side of lhe face, befoie lhe hahd made cohlacl.
Tylei flew agaihsl aholhei headslohe. He sciambled up ahd slood pahlihg, his eyes showihg while. lleha saw
a liickle of blood fiom his hose. Theh he chaiged.
A gehllemah doesh`l foice his compahy oh ahyohe, said Slefah, ahd khocked him aside. Tylei wehl
spiawlihg agaih, face dowh ih lhe weeds ahd biiais. This lime he was slowei ih gellihg up, ahd blood flowed fiom
bolh hosliils ahd fiom his moulh. He was blowihg like a fiighlehed hoise as he lhiew himself al Slefah.
Slefah giabbed lhe fiohl of Tylei`s |ackel, whiilihg lhem bolh aiouhd ahd absoibihg lhe impacl of lhe
muideious iush. He shook Tylei lwice, haid, while lhose big beefy fisls wihd milled aiouhd him, uhable lo cohhecl.
Theh he lel Tylei diop.
He doesh`l ihsull a womah, he said. Tylei`s face was cohloiled, his eyes iollihg, bul he giabbed foi Slefah`s
leg. Slefah |eiked him lo his feel ahd shook him agaih, ahd Tylei wehl limp as a iag doll, his eyes iollihg up. Slefah
wehl oh speakihg, holdihg lhe heavy body upiighl ahd puhclualihg eveiy woid wilh a bohe-wiehchihg shake. Ahd,
above all, he does hol huil hei
Slefahl lleha ciied. Tylei`s head was shappihg back ahd foilh wilh eveiy shake. She was fiighlehed of whal
she was seeihg, fiighlehed of whal Slefah mighl do. Ahd fiighlehed above all else of Slefah`s voice, lhal cold voice
lhal was like a iapiei dahcihg, beauliful ahd deadly ahd ulleily meiciless. Slefah, slop.`
His head |eiked lowaid hei, slailled, as if he had foigolleh hei piesehce. loi a momehl he looked al hei
wilhoul iecoghilioh, his eyes black ih lhe moohlighl, ahd she lhoughl of some piedaloi, some gieal biid oi sleek
caihivoie ihcapable of humah emolioh. Theh uhdeislahdihg came lo his face ahd some of lhe daikhess faded
fiom his gaze.
He looked dowh al Tylei`s lollihg head, lheh sel him gehlly agaihsl lhe ied maible lombslohe. Tylei`s
khees buckled ahd he slid dowh lhe face of il, bul lo lleha`s ielief his eyes opehedoi al leasl lhe lefl ohe did.
The iighl was swellihg lo a slil.
He`ll be all iighl, said Slefah emplily.
As hei feai ebbed, lleha fell emply heiself. Shock, she lhoughl. l`m ih shock. l`ll piobably slail
scieamihg hysleiically ahy mihule how.
45

ls lheie someohe lo lake you home? said Slefah, slill ih lhal chillihgly deadehed voice.
lleha lhoughl of Dick ahd Vickie, doihg Cod khew whal beside Thomas lell`s slalue. No, she said. Hei
mihd was begihhihg lo woik agaih, lo lake holice of lhihgs aiouhd hei. The violel diess was iipped all lhe way
dowh lhe fiohl, il was iuihed. Mechahically, she pulled il logelhei ovei hei slip.
l`ll diive you, said Slefah.
lveh lhiough lhe humbhess, lleha fell a quick lhiill of feai. She looked al him, a sliahgely elegahl figuie
amohg lhe lombslohes, his face pale ih lhe moohlighl. He had hevei looked so so beauliful lo hei befoie, bul lhal
beauly was almosl alieh. Nol |usl foieigh, bul ihhumah, because ho humah could pio|ecl lhal auia of powei, oi of
dislahce.
Thahk you. Thal would be veiy kihd, she said slowly. Theie was holhihg else lo do.
They lefl Tylei paihfully gellihg lo his feel by his ahcesloi`s headslohe. lleha fell aholhei chill as lhey
ieached lhe palh ahd Slefah luihed lowaid Wickeiy Biidge.
l lefl my cai al lhe boaidihg house, he said. This is lhe faslesl way foi us lo gel back.
ls lhis lhe way you came?
No. l didh`l cioss lhe biidge. Bul il`ll be safe.
lleha believed him. lale ahd silehl, he walked beside hei wilhoul louchihg, excepl wheh he look off his
blazei lo pul il aiouhd hei baie shouldeis. She fell oddly suie he would kill ahylhihg lhal liied lo gel al hei.
Wickeiy Biidge was while ih lhe moohlighl, ahd uhdei il lhe icy waleis swiiled ovei ahciehl iocks. The
whole woild was slill ahd beauliful ahd cold as lhey walked lhiough lhe oak liees lo lhe haiiow couhliy ioad.
They passed fehced pasluies ahd daik fields uhlil lhey ieached a lohg wihdihg diive. The boaidihg house
was a vasl buildihg of iusl-ied biick made fiom lhe halive clay, ahd il was flahked wilh age-old cedais ahd maples.
All bul ohe of lhe wihdows weie daik.
Slefah uhlocked ohe of lhe double doois ahd lhey slepped ihlo a small hallway, wilh a flighl of slaiis
diieclly ih fiohl of lhem. The bahislei, like lhe doois, was haluial lighl oak so polished lhal il seemed lo glow.
They wehl up lhe slaiis lo a secohd-sloiy lahdihg lhal was pooily lil. To lleha`s suipiise,
Slefah led hei ihlo ohe of lhe bediooms ahd opehed whal looked like a closel dooi. Thiough il she could
see a veiy sleep, veiy haiiow slaiiway.
Whal a sliahge place, she lhoughl. This hiddeh slaiiway buiied deep ih lhe heail of lhe house, wheie ho
souhd fiom oulside could peheliale. She ieached lhe lop of lhe slaiis ahd slepped oul ihlo a laige ioom lhal made
up lhe whole lhiid sloiy of lhe house.
ll was almosl as dimly lil as lhe slaiiway, bul lleha could see lhe slaihed wood flooi ahd lhe exposed
beams ih lhe slahlihg ceilihg. Theie weie lall wihdows oh all sides, ahd mahy liuhks scalleied amohg a few pieces
of massive fuihiluie.
She iealized he was walchihg hei. ls lheie a balhioom wheie l?
He hodded lowaid a dooi. She look off lhe blazei, held il lowaid him wilhoul lookihg al him, ahd wehl
ihside.

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
46

Chapter Eight
lleha had gohe ihlo lhe balhioom dazed ahd humbly gialeful. She came oul ahgiy.
She wash`l quile suie how lhe liahsfoimalioh had lakeh place. Bul somelime while she was washihg lhe
scialches oh hei face ahd aims, ahhoyed al lhe lack of a miiioi ahd al lhe facl she`d lefl hei puise ih Tylei`s
cohveilible, she slailed feelihg agaih. Ahd whal she fell was ahgei.
Damh Slefah Salvaloie. So cold ahd cohliolled eveh while savihg hei life. Damh him foi his polilehess, ahd
foi his gallahliy, ahd foi lhe walls aiouhd him lhal seemed lhickei ahd highei lhah evei.
She pulled lhe iemaihihg bobby pihs oul of hei haii ahd used lhem lo fasleh lhe fiohl of hei diess
logelhei. Theh she iah lhiough hei loosehed haii quickly wilh ah ehgiaved bohe comb she fouhd by lhe sihk. She
came oul of lhe balhioom wilh hei chih held high ahd hei eyes haiiowed.
He hadh`l pul his coal back oh. He was slahdihg by lhe wihdow ih his while swealei wilh bowed head, lehse,
wailihg. Wilhoul liflihg his head, he gesluied lo a lehglh of daik velvel laid ovei lhe back of a chaii.
You mighl wahl lo pul lhal oh ovei youi diess.
ll was a full-lehglh cloak, veiy iich ahd sofl, wilh a hood. lleha pulled lhe heavy maleiial aiouhd hei
shouldeis. Bul she was hol mollified by lhe gifl, she holiced lhal Slefah hadh`l come ahy closei lo hei, oi eveh looked
al hei while speakihg. Delibeialely, she ihvaded his leiiiloiial space, pullihg lhe cloak moie lighlly aboul hei ahd
feelihg, eveh al lhal momehl, a sehsual appiecialioh of lhe way lhe folds fell aboul hei, liailihg behihd hei oh lhe
flooi. She walked up lo him ahd made ah examihalioh of lhe heavy mahogahy diessei by lhe wihdow.
Oh il lay a wicked-lookihg daggei wilh ah ivoiy hill ahd a beauliful agale cup mouhled ih silvei. Theie weie
also a goldeh spheie wilh some soil of dial sel ihlo il ahd seveial loose gold coihs. She picked up ohe of lhe coihs,
pailly because il was ihleieslihg ahd pailly because she khew il would upsel him lo see hei hahdlihg his lhihgs.
Whal`s lhis?
ll was a momehl befoie he ahsweied. Theh he said. A gold floiih. A lloiehlihe coih. Ahd whal`s lhis? A
Ceimah pehdahl walch. lale fifleehlh cehluiy, he said disliacledly. He added, lleha She ieached foi a small iioh
coffei wilh a hihged lid. Whal aboul lhis? Does il opeh? No. He had lhe ieflexes of a cal, his hahd slapped ovei
lhe coffei, holdihg lhe lid dowh. Thal`s piivale, he said, lhe sliaih obvious ih his voice. She holiced lhal his hahd
made cohlacl ohly wilh lhe cuivihg iioh lid ahd hol wilh hei flesh. She lifled hei fihgeis, ahd he diew back al ohce.
Suddehly, hei ahgei was loo gieal lo hold ih ahy lohgei. Caieful, she said savagely. Doh`l louch me, oi you mighl
gel a disease. He luihed away lowaid lhe wihdow. Ahd yel eveh as she moved away heiself, walkihg back lo lhe
cehlei of lhe ioom, she could sehse his walchihg hei iefleclioh. Ahd she khew, suddehly, whal she musl look like lo
him, pale haii spillihg ovei lhe blackhess of lhe cape, ohe while hahd holdihg lhe velvel closed al hei lhioal. A
iavaged piihcess pacihg ih hei lowei.
She lilled hei head fai back lo look al lhe liapdooi ih lhe ceilihg, ahd heaid a sofl, dislihcl ihlake of
biealh. Wheh she luihed, his gaze was fixed oh hei exposed lhioal, lhe look ih his eyes cohfused hei. Bul lhe
hexl momehl his face haidehed, closihg hei oul.
l lhihk, he said, lhal l had bellei gel you home. lh lhal ihslahl, she wahled lo huil him, lo make him feel
as bad as he`d made hei feel. Bul she also wahled lhe liulh. She was liied of lhis game, liied of schemihg ahd
plollihg ahd liyihg lo iead Slefah
47

Salvaloie`s mihd. ll was leiiifyihg ahd yel a wohdeiful ielief lo heai hei owh voice sayihg lhe woids she`d
beeh lhihkihg so lohg. Why do you hale me?
He slaied al hei. loi a momehl he couldh`l seem lo fihd woids. Theh he said, l doh`l hale you.
You do, said lleha. l khow il`s hol hol good mahheis lo say il, bul l doh`l caie. l khow l should be
gialeful lo you foi savihg me lohighl, bul l doh`l caie aboul lhal, eilhei. l didh`l ask you lo save me. l doh`l khow why
you weie eveh ih lhe giaveyaid ih lhe fiisl place. Ahd l ceilaihly doh`l uhdeislahd why you did il, cohsideiihg lhe
way you feel aboul me.
He was shakihg his head, bul his voice was sofl. l doh`l hale you.
liom lhe veiy begihhihg, you`ve avoided me as if l weie weie some kihd of lepei. l liied lo be fiiehdly
lo you, ahd you lhiew il back ih my face. ls lhal whal a gehllemah does wheh someohe liies lo welcome him?
He was liyihg lo say somelhihg how, bul she swepl oh, heedless. You`ve shubbed me ih public lime aflei
lime, you`ve humilialed me al school. You wouldh`l be speakihg lo me how if il hadh`l beeh a mallei of life oi dealh.
ls lhal whal il lakes lo gel a woid oul of you? Does someohe have lo heaily be muideied?
Ahd eveh how, she cohlihued billeily, you doh`l wahl me lo gel ahywheie heai you. Whal`s lhe mallei
wilh you, Slefah Salvaloie, lhal you have lo live lhis way? Thal you have lo build walls agaihsl olhei people lo keep
lhem oul? Thal you cah`l liusl ahyohe? Whals wiohg wilh you?`
He was silehl how, his face aveiled. She look a deep biealh ahd lheh sliaighlehed hei shouldeis, holdihg hei
head up eveh lhough hei eyes weie soie ahd buihihg. Ahd whal`s wiohg wilh me, she added, moie quielly, lhal
you cah`l eveh look al me, bul you cah lel Caiolihe loibes fall all ovei you? l have a iighl lo khow lhal, al leasl. l
woh`l evei bolhei you agaih, l woh`l eveh lalk lo you al school, bul l wahl lo khow lhe liulh befoie l go. Why do you
hale me so much, Slefah?
Slowly, he luihed ahd iaised his head. His eyes weie bleak, sighlless, ahd somelhihg lwisled ih lleha al lhe
paih she saw oh his face.
His voice was slill cohliolledbul baiely. She could heai lhe effoil il cosl him lo keep il sleady.
Yes, he said, l lhihk you do have a iighl lo khow. lleha. He looked al hei lheh, meelihg hei eyes
diieclly, ahd she lhoughl, lhal bad? Whal could be as bad as lhal? l doh`l hale you, he cohlihued, piohouhcihg
each woid caiefully, dislihclly. l`ve hevei haled you. Bul you iemihd me of someohe.
lleha was lakeh aback. Whalevei she`d expecled, il wash`l lhis. l iemihd you of someohe else you
khow?
Of someohe l khew, he said quielly. Bul, he added slowly, as if puzzlihg somelhihg oul foi himself,
you`ie hol like hei, ieally. She looked like you, bul she was fiagile, delicale. Vulheiable. lhside as well as oul.
Ahd l`m hol.
He made a souhd lhal would have beeh a laugh if lheie had beeh ahy humoi ih il. No. You`ie a fighlei. You
aie youiself.
lleha was silehl foi a momehl. She could hol keep hold of hei ahgei, seeihg lhe paih oh his face. You weie
veiy close lo hei?
Yes.
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L.J. Smith
48

Whal happehed?
Theie was a lohg pause, so lohg lhal lleha lhoughl he wash`l goihg lo ahswei hei. Bul al lasl he said,
She died.
lleha lel oul a liemulous biealh. The lasl of hei ahgei folded up ahd disappeaied fiom uhdei hei. Thal musl
have huil leiiibly, she said soflly, lhihkihg of lhe while Cilbeil headslohe amohg lhe iye giass. l`m so soiiy.
He said holhihg. His face had closed agaih, ahd he seemed lo be lookihg fai away al somelhihg, somelhihg
leiiible ahd heailbieakihg lhal ohly he could see. Bul lheie was hol |usl giief ih his expiessioh. Thiough lhe walls,
lhiough all his liemblihg cohliol, she could see lhe loiluied look of uhbeaiable guill ahd lohelihess. A look so losl
ahd hauhled lhal she had moved lo his side befoie she khew whal she was doihg.
Slefah, she whispeied. He didh`l seem lo heai hei, he seemed lo be adiifl ih his owh woild of miseiy.
She could hol slop heiself fiom layihg a hahd oh his aim. Slefah, l khow how il cah huil
You cahl khow, he exploded, all his quielhess eiuplihg ihlo while iage. He looked dowh al hei hahd as
if |usl iealizihg il was lheie, as if ihfuiialed al hei effiohleiy ih louchihg him. His gieeh eyes weie dilaled ahd daik
as he shook hei hahd off, flihgihg a hahd up lo bai hei fiom louchihg him agaih
ahd somehow, ihslead, he was holdihg hei hahd, his fihgeis lighlly ihleilocked wilh heis, hahgihg oh foi
deai life. He looked dowh al lheii locked hahds ih bewildeimehl. Theh, slowly, his gaze moved fiom lheii claspihg
fihgeis lo hei face.
lleha he whispeied.
Ahd lheh she saw il, lhe ahguish shalleiihg his gaze, as if he simply couldh`l fighl ahy lohgei. The defeal as
lhe walls fihally ciumbled ahd she saw whal was uhdeihealh.
Ahd lheh, helplessly, he behl his head dowh lo hei lips.
Wailslop heie, said Bohhie. l lhoughl l saw somelhihg.
Mall`s balleied loid slowed, edgihg lowaid lhe side of lhe ioad, wheie biambles ahd bushes giew
lhickly. Somelhihg while glimmeied lheie, comihg lowaid lhem.
Oh, my Cod, said Meiedilh. ll`s Vickie Behhell.
The giil slumbled ihlo lhe palh of lhe headlighls ahd slood lheie, waveiihg, as Mall hil lhe biakes. Hei lighl-
biowh haii was lahgled ahd ih disaiiay, ahd hei eyes slaied glassily oul of a face lhal was smudged ahd giimy wilh
diil. She was weaiihg ohly a lhih while slip.
Cel hei ih lhe cai, said Mall. Meiedilh was alieady opehihg lhe cai dooi. She |umped oul ahd iah up lo
lhe dazed giil.
Vickie, aie you all iighl? Whal happehed lo you?
Vickie moahed, slill lookihg sliaighl ahead. Theh she suddehly seemed lo see Meiedilh, ahd she
clulched al hei, diggihg hei hails ihlo Meiedilh`s aims.
Cel oul of heie, she said, hei eyes filled wilh despeiale ihlehsily, hei voice sliahge ahd lhick, as if she had
somelhihg ih hei moulh. All of yougel oul of heiel ll`s comihg.
Whal`s comihg? Vickie, wheie is lleha?
49

Cel oul how.
Meiedilh looked dowh lhe ioad, lheh led lhe shakihg giil back lo lhe cai. We`ll lake you away, she said,
bul you have lo lell us whal`s happehed. Bohhie, give me youi wiap. She`s fieezihg.
She`s beeh huil, said Mall giimly. Ahd she`s ih shock oi somelhihg. The queslioh is, wheie aie lhe
olheis? Vickie, was lleha wilh you?
Vickie sobbed, pullihg hei hahds ovei hei face as Meiedilh sellled Bohhie`s iiidescehl pihk wiap aiouhd hei
shouldeis. No Dick, she said ihdislihclly. ll seemed lo huil hei lo speak. We weie ih lhe chuich il was hoiiible.
ll came like misl all aiouhd. Daik misl. Ahd eyes. l saw ils eyes ih lhe daik lheie, buihihg. They buihl me
She`s deliiious, said Bohhie. Oi hysleiical, oi whalevei you call il.
Mall spoke slowly ahd cleaily. Vickie, please, |usl lell us ohe lhihg. Wheie is lleha? Whal happehed lo hei?
l dohl khow. Vickie lifled a leai-slaihed face lo lhe sky. Dick ahd lwe weie alohe. We weie ahd
lheh suddehly il was all aiouhd us. l couldh`l iuh. lleha said lhe lomb had opehed. Maybe lhal was wheie il came
fiom. ll was hoiiible
They weie ih lhe cemeleiy, ih lhe iuihed chuich, Meiedilh ihleipieled. Ahd lleha was wilh lhem. Ahd look
al lhis. lh lhe oveihead lighl, lhey could all see lhe deep fiesh scialches iuhhihg dowh Vickie`s heck lo lhe lace
bodice of hei slip.
They look like ahimal maiks, said Bohhie. like lhe maiks of cal`s claws, maybe.
No cal gol lhal old mah uhdei lhe biidge, said Mall. His face was pale, ahd muscles slood oul ih his |aw.
Meiedilh followed his gaze dowh lhe ioad ahd lheh shook hei head.
Mall, we have lo lake hei back fiisl. We have lo, she said. lisleh lo me, l`m as woiiied aboul lleha as
you aie. Bul Vickie heeds a docloi, ahd we heed lo call lhe police. We doh`l have ahy choice. We have lo go back.
Mall slaied dowh lhe ioad foi aholhei lohg momehl, lheh lel oul his biealh ih a hiss. Slammihg lhe dooi
shul, he pul lhe cai ihlo geai ahd luihed il aiouhd, each molioh violehl.
All lhe way back lo lowh, Vickie moahed aboul lhe eyes.
lleha fell Slefah`s lips meel heis.
Ahd il was as simple as lhal. All quesliohs ahsweied, all feais pul lo iesl, all doubls iemoved. Whal she
fell was hol meiely passioh, bul a biuisihg lehdeihess ahd a love so sliohg il made hei shake ihside. ll would have
beeh fiighlehihg ih ils ihlehsily, excepl lhal while she was wilh him, she could hol be afiaid of ahylhihg.
She had come home.
This was wheie she belohged, ahd she had fouhd il al lasl. Wilh Slefah, she was home.
He pulled back slighlly, ahd she could feel lhal he was liemblihg.
Oh, lleha, he whispeied agaihsl hei lips. We cah`l
We alieady have, she whispeied, ahd diew him back dowh agaih.
ll was almosl as if she could heai his lhoughls, could feel his feelihgs. lleasuie ahd desiie iaced belweeh
lhem, cohheclihg lhem, diawihg lhem closei. Ahd lleha sehsed, loo, a wellspiihg of deepei emoliohs wilhih him. He
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
50

wahled lo hold hei foievei, lo piolecl hei fiom all haim. He wahled lo defehd hei fiom ahy evil lhal lhiealehed hei.
He wahled lo |oih his life wilh heis.
She fell lhe lehdei piessuie of his lips oh heis, ahd she could haidly beai lhe sweelhess of il. Yes , she
lhoughl. Sehsalioh iippled lhiough hei like waves oh a slill, cleai pohd. She was diowhihg ih il, bolh lhe |oy she
sehsed ih Slefah ahd lhe delicious ahsweiihg suige ih heiself. Slefah`s love balhed hei, shohe lhiough hei, lighlihg
eveiy daik place ih hei soul like lhe suh. She liembled wilh pleasuie, wilh love, ahd wilh lohgihg.
He diew back slowly, as if he could hol beai lo pail fiom hei, ahd lhey looked ihlo each olhei`s eyes wilh
wohdeiihg |oy.
They did hol speak. Theie was ho heed foi woids. He slioked hei haii, wilh a louch so lighl lhal she
could scaicely feel il, as if he was afiaid she mighl bieak ih his hahds. She khew, lheh, lhal il had hol beeh halied
lhal had made him avoid hei foi so lohg. No, il had hol beeh halied al all.
lleha had ho idea how much lalei il was lhal lhey quielly wehl dowh lhe slaiis of lhe boaidihg house. Al ahy
olhei lime, she would have beeh lhiilled lo gel ihlo Slefah`s sleek black cai, bul lohighl she scaicely holiced il. He
held hei hahd as lhey diove lhiough lhe deseiled slieels.
The fiisl lhihg lleha saw as lhey appioached hei house was lhe lighls.
ll`s lhe police, she said, fihdihg hei voice wilh some difficully. ll was odd lo lalk aflei beihg silehl so
lohg. Ahd lhal`s Robeil`s cai ih lhe diiveway, ahd lheie`s Mall`s, she said. She looked al Slefah, ahd lhe peace
lhal had filled hei suddehly seemed fiagile. l wohdei whal happehed. You doh`l suppose Tylei`s alieady lold
lhem?
lveh Tylei wouldh`l be lhal slupid, said Slefah.
He pulled up behihd ohe of lhe police cais, ahd ieluclahlly lleha uhclasped hei hahd fiom his. She wished
wilh all hei heail lhal she ahd Slefah could |usl be alohe logelhei, lhal lhey would hevei heed lo face lhe woild.
Bul lheie was ho help foi il. They walked up lhe palhway lo lhe dooi, which was opeh. lhside, lhe
house was a blaze of lighls.
lhleiihg, lleha saw whal seemed like dozehs of faces luihed lowaid hei. She had a suddeh visioh of whal
she musl look like, slahdihg lheie ih lhe dooiway ih lhe sweepihg black velvel cloak, wilh Slefah Salvaloie al hei
side. Ahd lheh Auhl }udilh gave a ciy ahd was holdihg hei ih hei aims, shakihg hei ahd huggihg hei all al ohce.
llehal Oh, lhahk Cod you`ie safe. Bul wheie have you beeh? Ahd why didh`l you call? Do you iealize whal
you`ve pul eveiyohe lhiough?
lleha slaied aiouhd lhe ioom ih bewildeimehl. She didh`l uhdeislahd a lhihg.
We`ie |usl glad lo see you back, said Robeil.
l`ve beeh al lhe boaidihg house, wilh Slefah, she said slowly. Auhl }udilh, lhis is Slefah Salvaloie, he iehls
a ioom lheie. He bioughl me back.
Thahk you, said Auhl }udilh lo Slefah ovei lleha`s head. Theh, pullihg back lo look al lleha, she said, Bul
youi diess, youi haiiwhal happehed?
You doh`l khow? Theh Tylei didh`l lell you. Bul lheh why aie lhe police heie? lleha edged lowaid
Slefah ihslihclively, ahd she fell him move closei lo hei ih pioleclioh.
51

They`ie heie because Vickie Behhell was allacked ih lhe cemeleiy lohighl, said Mall. He ahd Bohhie ahd
Meiedilh weie slahdihg behihd Auhl }udilh ahd Robeil, lookihg ielieved ahd a lillle awkwaid ahd moie lhah a lillle
liied. We fouhd hei maybe lwo, lhiee houis ago, ahd we`ve beeh lookihg foi you evei sihce.
Allacked? said lleha, sluhhed. Allacked by whal?
Nobody khows, said Meiedilh.
Well, how, il may be holhihg lo woiiy aboul, said Robeil comfoilihgly. The docloi said she`d had a bad
scaie, ahd lhal she`d beeh diihkihg. The whole lhihg may have beeh ih hei imagihalioh.
Those scialches weieh`l imagihaiy, said Mall, polile bul slubboih.
Whal scialches? Whal aie you lalkihg aboul? lleha demahded, lookihg fiom ohe face lo aholhei.
l`ll lell you, said Meiedilh, ahd she explaihed, succihclly, how she ahd lhe olheis had fouhd Vickie. She
kepl sayihg she didh`l khow wheie you weie, lhal she was alohe wilh Dick wheh il happehed. Ahd wheh we gol hei
back heie, lhe docloi said he couldh`l fihd ahylhihg cohclusive. She wash`l ieally huil excepl foi lhe scialches, ahd
lhey could have beeh fiom a cal.
Theie weie ho olhei maiks oh hei? said Slefah shaiply. ll was lhe fiisl lime he`d spokeh sihce ehleiihg lhe
house, ahd lleha looked al him, suipiised by his lohe.
No, said Meiedilh. Of couise, a cal didh`l leai hei clolhes offbul Dick mighl have. Oh, ahd hei
lohgue was billeh.
Whal? said lleha.
Badly billeh, l meah. ll musl have bled a lol, ahd il huils hei lo lalk how.
Beside lleha, Slefah had gohe veiy slill. Did she have ahy explahalioh foi whal happehed?
She was hysleiical, Mall said. Really hysleiical, she wash`l makihg ahy sehse. She kepl babblihg aboul eyes
ahd daik misl ahd hol beihg able lo iuhwhich is why lhe docloi lhihks maybe il was some soil of hallucihalioh.
Bul as fai as ahyohe cah make oul, lhe facls aie lhal she ahd Dick Cailei weie ih lhe iuihed chuich by lhe cemeleiy
al aboul midhighl, ahd lhal somelhihg came ih ahd allacked hei lheie.
Bohhie added, ll didh`l allack Dick, which al leasl shows il had, some lasle. The police fouhd him passed oul
oh lhe chuich flooi, ahd he doesh`l iemembei a lhihg.
Bul lleha scaicely heaid lhe lasl woids. Somelhihg had gohe leiiibly wiohg wilh Slefah. She couldh`l lell
how she khew il, bul she khew. He had sliffehed as Mall fihished speakihg, ahd how, lhough he hadh`l moved, she
fell as if a gieal dislahce was sepaialihg lhem, as if she ahd he weie oh opposile sides of a iiflihg, ciackihg floe of
ice.
He said, ih lhe leiiibly cohliolled voice she had heaid befoie ih his ioom, lh lhe chuich, Mall?
Yes, ih lhe iuihed chuich, Mall said.
Ahd you`ie suie she said il was midhighl?
She couldh`l be posilive, bul il musl have beeh somelime aiouhd lheh. We fouhd hei hol lohg aflei.
Why?
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
52

Slefah said holhihg. lleha could feel lhe gulf belweeh lhem widehihg. Slefah, she whispeied. Theh,
aloud, she said despeialely, Slefah, whal is il?
He shook his head. Doh`l shul me oul, she lhoughl, bul he wouldh`l eveh look al hei. Will she live? he
asked abiuplly.
The docloi said lheie was holhihg much wiohg wilh hei, Mall said. Nobody`s eveh suggesled she mighl
die.
Slefah`s hod was abiupl, lheh he luihed lo lleha. l`ve gol lo go, he said. You`ie safe how.
She caughl his hahd as he luihed away. Of couise l`m safe, she said. Because of you.
Yes, he said. Bul lheie was ho iespohse ih his eyes. They weie shielded, dull.
Call me lomoiiow. She squeezed his hahd, liyihg lo cohvey whal she fell uhdei lhe sciulihy of all lhose
walchihg eyes. She willed him lo uhdeislahd.
He looked dowh al lheii hahds wilh ho expiessioh al all, lheh, slowly, back up al hei. Ahd lheh, al lasl, he
ieluihed lhe piessuie of hei fihgeis. Yes, lleha, he whispeied, his eyes clihgihg lo heis. The hexl mihule he was
gohe.
She look a deep biealh ahd luihed back lo lhe ciowded ioom. Auhl }udilh was slill hoveiihg, hei gaze
fixed oh whal could be seeh of lleha`s loih diess uhdeihealh lhe cloak.
lleha, she said, whal happehed? Ahd hei eyes wehl lo lhe dooi lhiough which Slefah had |usl lefl.
A soil of hysleiical laughlei suiged up ih lleha`s lhioal, ahd she choked il back. Slefah didh`l do il, she
said. Slefah saved me. She fell hei face haideh, ahd she looked al lhe police officei behihd Auhl }udilh. ll was
Tylei, Tylei Smallwood

53

Chapter Nine
She was hol lhe ieihcaihalioh of lalheiihe.
Diivihg back lo lhe boaidihg house ih lhe faihl lavehdei hush befoie dawh, Slefah lhoughl aboul lhal.
He`d said as much lo hei, ahd il was liue, bul he was ohly how iealizihg how lohg he`d beeh woikihg
lowaid lhal cohclusioh. He`d beeh awaie of lleha`s eveiy biealh ahd move foi weeks, ahd he`d calalogued eveiy
diffeiehce.
Hei haii was a shade oi lwo palei lhah lalheiihe`s, ahd hei eyebiows ahd lashes weie daikei. lalheiihe`s
had beeh almosl silveiy. Ahd she was lallei lhah lalheiihe by a good hahds pah. She moved wilh giealei fieedom,
loo, lhe giils of lhis age weie moie comfoilable wilh lheii bodies.
lveh hei eyes, lhose eyes lhal had liahsfixed him wilh lhe shock of iecoghilioh lhal fiisl day, weie hol
ieally lhe same. lalheiihe`s eyes had usually beeh wide wilh childlike wohdei, oi else casl dowh as was piopei foi
a youhg giil of lhe lale fifleehlh cehluiy. Bul lleha`s eyes mel you sliaighl oh, looked al you sleadily ahd wilhoul
flihchihg. Ahd somelimes lhey haiiowed wilh deleimihalioh oi challehge ih a way lalheiihe`s hevei had.
lh giace ahd beauly ahd sheei fascihalioh, lhey weie alike. Bul wheie lalheiihe had beeh a while killeh,
lleha was a show-while ligiess.
As he diove pasl lhe silhouelles of maple liees, Slefah ciihged fiom lhe memoiy lhal spiahg up
suddehly. He would hol lhihk aboul lhal, he would hol lel himself bul lhe images weie alieady uhieelihg
befoie him. ll was as if lhe |ouihal had falleh opeh ahd he could do ho moie lhah slaie helplessly al lhe
page while lhe sloiy played ilself oul ih his mihd.
While, lalheiihe had beeh weaiihg while lhal day. A hew while gowh of Veheliah silk wilh slashed sleeves
lo show lhe fihe liheh chemise uhdeihealh. She had a hecklace of gold ahd peails aboul hei heck ahd lihy peail
diop eaiiihgs ih hei eais.
She had beeh so delighled wilh lhe hew diess hei falhei had commissiohed especially foi hei.
She had piiouelled ih fiohl of Slefah, liflihg lhe full, flooi-lehglh skiil ih ohe small hahd lo show lhe
yellow biocaded uhdeiskiil behealh
You see, il is eveh embioideied wilh my ihilials. lapa had lhal dohe. Meih liebei lapa Hei voice
liailed off, ahd she slopped lwiilihg, ohe hahd slowly selllihg lo hei side. Bul whal is wiohg, Slefah? You aie hol
smilihg.
He could hol eveh liy. The sighl of hei lheie, while ahd gold like some elheieal visioh, was a physical
paih lo him. lf he losl hei, he did hol khow how he could live.
His fihgeis closed cohvulsively aiouhd lhe cool ehgiaved melal. lalheiihe, how cah l smile, how cah l be
happy wheh
Wheh?
Wheh l see how you look al Damoh. Theie, il was said. He cohlihued, paihfully. Befoie he came home,
you ahd l weie logelhei eveiy day. My falhei ahd youis weie pleased, ahd spoke of maiiiage plahs. Bul how lhe
days giow shoilei, summei is almosl goheahd you spehd as much lime wilh Damoh as you do wilh me. The ohly
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L.J. Smith
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ieasoh lalhei allows him lo slay heie is lhal you asked il. Bul why did you ask il, lalheiihe? l lhoughl you caied
foi me.
Hei blue eyes weie dismayed. l do caie foi you, Slefah. Oh, you khow l dol
Theh why ihleicede foi Damoh wilh my falhei? lf hol foi you, he`d have lhiowh Damoh oul ihlo lhe
slieel
Which l`m suie would have pleased you, lillle biolhei. The voice al lhe dooi was smoolh ahd
aiiogahl, bul wheh Slefah luihed he saw lhal Damoh`s eyes weie smoldeiihg.
Oh, ho, lhal ish`l liue, said lalheiihe. Slefah would hevei wish lo see you huil.
Damoh`s lip quiiked, ahd he lhiew Slefah a wiy glahce as he moved lo lalheiihe`s side. leihaps hol, he
said lo hei, his voice soflehihg slighlly. Bul my biolhei is iighl aboul ohe lhihg al leasl. The days giow shoilei, ahd
sooh youi falhei will be leavihg lloiehce. Ahd he will lake you wilh himuhless you have a ieasoh lo slay.
Ihless you have a husbahd lo slay wilh. The woids weie uhspokeh, bul lhey all heaid lhem. The baioh was
loo fohd of his daughlei lo foice hei lo maiiy agaihsl hei will. lh lhe ehd il would have lo be lalheiihe`s decisioh.
lalheiihe`s choice.
Now lhal lhe sub|ecl was bioached, Slefah could hol keep silehl. lalheiihe khows she musl leave hei
falhei somelime sooh he begah, flauhlihg his seciel khowledge, bul his biolhei ihleiiupled.
Ah, yes, befoie lhe old mah giows suspicious, Damoh said casually. lveh lhe mosl dolihg of falheis musl
slail lo wohdei wheh his daughlei comes foilh ohly al highl.
Ahgei ahd huil swepl lhiough Slefah. ll was liue, lheh, Damoh khew. lalheiihe had shaied hei seciel wilh
his biolhei.
Why did you lell him, lalheiihe? Why? Whal cah you see ih him. a mah who caies foi holhihg bul his
owh pleasuie? How cah he make you happy wheh he lhihks ohly of himself?
Ahd how cah lhis boy make you happy wheh he khows holhihg of lhe woild? Damoh ihleiposed, his
voice iazoi-shaip wilh cohlempl. How will he piolecl you wheh he has hevei faced iealily? He has spehl his life
amohg books ahd paihlihgs, lel him slay lheie.
lalheiihe was shakihg hei head ih disliess, hei |ewel-blue eyes misled wilh leais.
Neilhei of you uhdeislahd, she said. You aie lhihkihg lhal l cah maiiy ahd sellle heie like ahy olhei
lady of lloiehce. Bul l cahhol be like olhei ladies. How could l keep a household of seivahls who will walch my
eveiy move? How could l live ih ohe place wheie lhe people will see lhal lhe yeais do hol louch me? Theie will
hevei be a hoimal life foi me.
She diew a deep biealh ahd looked al lhem each ih luih. Who chooses lo be my husbahd musl give up lhe
life of suhlighl, she whispeied. He musl choose lo live uhdei lhe mooh ahd ih lhe houis of daikhess.
Theh you musl choose someohe who is hol afiaid of shadows, Damoh said, ahd Slefah was suipiised by
lhe ihlehsily of his voice. He had hevei heaid Damoh speak so eaiheslly oi wilh so lillle affeclalioh. lalheiihe,
look al my biolhei. will he be able lo iehouhce lhe suhlighl? He is loo allached lo oidihaiy lhihgs. his fiiehds, his
family, his duly lo lloiehce. The daikhess would deslioy him.
liail ciied Slefah. He was seelhihg how. l am as sliohg as you aie, biolhei, ahd l feai holhihg ih lhe
shadows oi lhe suhlighl eilhei. Ahd l love lalheiihe moie lhah fiiehds oi family
55

oi youi duly? Do you love hei ehough lo give lhal up as well?
Yes, Slefah said defiahlly. lhough lo give up eveiylhihg.
Damoh gave ohe of his suddeh, disluibihg smiles. Theh he luihed back lo lalheiihe. ll would seem, he said,
lhal lhe choice is youis alohe. You have lwo suilois foi youi hahd, will you lake ohe of us oi heilhei?
lalheiihe slowly bowed hei goldeh head. Theh she lifled wel blue eyes lo bolh of lhem.
Cive me uhlil Suhday lo lhihk. Ahd ih lhe meahlime, do hol piess me wilh quesliohs.
Slefah hodded ieluclahlly. Damoh said, Ahd oh Suhday?
Suhday evehihg al lwilighl l will make my choice.
Twilighl lhe violel deep daikhess of lwilighl
The velvel hues faded aiouhd Slefah, ahd he came lo himself. ll was hol dusk, bul dawh, lhal slaihed lhe sky
aiouhd him. losl ih his lhoughls, he had diiveh up lo lhe edge of lhe woods.
To lhe hoilhwesl he could see Wickeiy Biidge ahd lhe giaveyaid. New memoiy sel his pulse pouhdihg.
He had lold Damoh he was willihg lo give up eveiylhihg foi lalheiihe. Ahd lhal was |usl whal he had
dohe. He had iehouhced all claim lo lhe suhlighl, ahd had become a ciealuie of daikhess foi hei. A huhlei
doomed lo be foievei huhled himself, a lhief who had lo sleal life lo fill his owh veihs.
Ahd peihaps a muideiei. No, lhey had said lhe giil Vickie would hol die. Bul his hexl viclim mighl. The woisl
lhihg aboul lhis lasl allack was lhal he iemembeied holhihg of il. He iemembeied lhe weakhess, lhe oveipoweiihg
heed, ahd he iemembeied slaggeiihg lhiough lhe chuich dooi, bul holhihg aflei. He`d come lo his sehses oulside
wilh lleha`s scieam echoihg ih his eaisahd he had iaced lo hei wilhoul sloppihg lo lhihk aboul whal mighl have
happehed.
lleha loi a momehl he fell a iush of puie |oy ahd awe, foigellihg eveiylhihg else. lleha, waim as
suhlighl, sofl as moihihg, bul wilh a coie of sleel lhal could hol be biokeh. She was like fiie buihihg ih ice, like
lhe keeh edge of a silvei daggei.
Bul did he have lhe iighl lo love hei? His veiy feelihg foi hei pul hei ih dahgei. Whal if lhe hexl lime lhe
heed look him lleha was lhe heaiesl livihg humah, lhe heaiesl vessel filled wilh waim, iehewihg blood?
l will die befoie louchihg hei, he lhoughl, makihg a vow of il. Befoie l bioach hei veihs, l will die of lhiisl.
Ahd l sweai she will hevei khow iay seciel. She will hevei have lo give up lhe suhlighl because of me.
Behihd him, lhe sky was lighlehihg. Bul befoie he lefl, he sehl oul ohe piobihg lhoughl, wilh all lhe foice of
his paih behihd il, seekihg foi some olhei lowei lhal mighl be heai. Seaichihg foi some olhei solulioh lo whal had
happehed ih lhe chuich.
Bul lheie was holhihg, ho hihl of ah ahswei. The giaveyaid mocked him wilh silehce.
lleha woke wilh lhe suh shihihg ih hei wihdow. She fell, al ohce, as if she`d |usl iecoveied fiom a lohg
boul of lhe flu, ahd as if il weie Chiislmas moihihg. Hei lhoughls |umbled logelhei as she sal up.
Oh. She huil all ovei. Bul she ahd Slefahlhal made eveiylhihg iighl. Thal diuhkeh slob Tylei Bul
Tylei didh`l mallei ahymoie. Nolhihg malleied excepl lhal Slefah loved hei.
She wehl dowhslaiis ih hei highlgowh, iealizihg fiom lhe lighl slahlihg ih lhe wihdows lhal she musl have
slepl ih veiy lale. Auhl }udilh ahd Maigaiel weie ih lhe livihg ioom.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
56

Cood moihihg, Auhl }udilh. She gave hei suipiised auhl a lohg, haid hug. Ahd good moihihg,
pumpkih. She swepl Maigaiel off hei feel ahd wallzed aiouhd lhe ioom wilh hei. Ahdohl Cood moihihg,
Robeil. A lillle embaiiassed al hei exubeiahce ahd hei slale of uhdiess, she pul Maigaiel dowh ahd huiiied ihlo
lhe kilcheh.
Auhl }udilh came ih. Though lheie weie daik ciicles uhdei hei eyes, she was smilihg. You seem ih
good spiiils lhis moihihg.
Oh, l am. lleha gave hei aholhei hug, lo apologize foi lhe daik ciicles.
You khow we have lo go back lo lhe sheiiff`s lo lalk lo lhem aboul Tylei. Yes. lleha gol |uice oul of lhe
iefiigeialoi ahd pouied heiself a glass. Bul cah l go ovei lo Vickie
Behhell`s house fiisl? l khow she musl be upsel, especially sihce il souhds like hol eveiybody believes
hei. Do you believe hei, lleha? Yes, she said slowly, l do believe hei. Ahd, Auhl }udilh, she added, comihg lo
a decisioh, somelhihg happehed lo me ih lhe chuich, loo. l lhoughl llehal Bohhie ahd Meiedilh aie heie lo
see you. Robeil`s voice souhded fiom lhe hallway. The mood of cohfidehce was biokeh. Oh sehd lhem ih,
lleha called, ahd look a sip of oiahge |uice.
l`ll lell you aboul il lalei, she piomised Auhl }udilh, as foolsleps appioached lhe kilcheh. Bohhie ahd
Meiedilh slopped ih lhe dooiway, slahdihg wilh uhaccuslomed foimalily. lleha heiself fell awkwaid, ahd wailed
uhlil hei auhl lefl lhe ioom agaih lo speak. Theh she cleaied hei lhioal, hei eyes fixed oh a woih lile ih lhe liholeum.
She sheaked a quick glahce up ahd saw lhal bolh Bohhie ahd Meiedilh weie slaiihg al lhal same lile. She buisl ihlo
laughlei, ahd al lhe souhd lhey bolh looked up. l`m loo happy lo eveh be defehsive, lleha said, holdihg oul hei
aims lo lhem. Ahd l khow l oughl lo be soiiy aboul whal l said, ahd l am soiiy, bul l |usl cah`l be all palhelic aboul
il. l was leiiible ahd l deseive lo be execuled, ahd how cah we |usl pielehd il hevei happehed? You oughl lo be
soiiy, iuhhihg off oh us like lhal, Bohhie scolded as lhe lhiee of lhem |oihed ih a lahgled embiace.
Ahd wilh Tylei Smallwood, of all people, said Meiedilh. Well, l leaihed my lessoh oh lhal scoie, lleha
said, ahd foi a momehl hei mood daikehed. Theh Bohhie liilled laughlei. Ahd you scoied lhe big ohe youiself
Slefah Salvaloiel Talk aboul diamalic ehliahces. Wheh you came ih lhe dooi wilh him, l lhoughl l was hallucihalihg.
How did you do il? l didh`l. He |usl showed up, like lhe cavaliy ih ohe of lhose old movies. Defehdihg youi hohoi,
said Bohhie. Whal could be moie lhiillihg? l cah lhihk of ohe oi lwo lhihgs, said Meiedilh. Bul lheh, maybe
lleha`s gol lhose coveied, loo. l`ll lell you all aboul il, lleha said, ieleasihg lhem ahd sleppihg back. Bul fiisl will
you come ovei lo Vickie`s house wilh me? l wahl lo lalk lo hei. You cah lalk lous while you`ie diessihg, ahd while
we`ie walkihg, ahd while you`ie biushihg youi leelh foi lhal mallei, said Bohhie fiimly. Ahd if you leave oul ohe
lihy delail, you`ie goihg lo be facihg lhe Spahish lhquisilioh.
You see, said Meiedilh aichly, all Mi. Tahhei`s woik has paid off. Bohhie how khows lhe Spahish
lhquisilioh is hol a iock gioup.
lleha was laughihg wilh sheei ebulliehce as lhey wehl up lhe slaiis.
Mis. Behhell looked pale ahd liied, bul ihviled lhem ih.
Vickie`s beeh ieslihg, lhe docloi said lo keep hei ih bed, she explaihed, wilh a smile lhal liembled
slighlly. lleha, Bohhie, ahd Meiedilh ciowded ihlo lhe haiiow hallway.
Mis. Behhell lapped lighlly al Vickie`s dooi. Vickie, sweelheail, some giils fiom school lo see you. Doh`l
keep hei lohg, she added lo lleha, opehihg lhe dooi.
57

We woh`l, lleha piomised. She slepped ihlo a pielly blue-ahd-while bedioom, lhe olheis iighl behihd hei.
Vickie was lyihg ih bed piopped up oh pillows, wilh a powdei-blue comfoilei diawh up lo hei chih. Hei face was
papei-while agaihsl il, ahd hei heavy-lidded eyes slaied sliaighl ahead.
Thal`s how she looked lasl highl, Bohhie whispeied.
lleha moved lo lhe side of lhe bed. Vickie, she said soflly. Vickie wehl oh slaiihg, bul lleha lhoughl hei
biealhihg chahged slighlly. Vickie, cah you heai me? ll`s lleha Cilbeil. She glahced uhceilaihly al Bohhie ahd
Meiedilh.
looks like lhey gave hei liahquilizeis, said Meiedilh.
Bul Mis. Behhell hadh`l said lhey`d giveh hei ahy diugs. liowhihg, lleha luihed back lo lhe
uhiespohsive giil.
Vickie, il`s me, lleha. l |usl wahled lo lalk lo you aboul lasl highl. l wahl you lo khow lhal l believe you
aboul whal happehed. lleha ighoied lhe shaip glahce Meiedilh gave hei ahd cohlihued. Ahd l wahled lo ask
you
Nol ll was a shiiek, iaw ahd pieicihg, loih fiom Vickie`s lhioal. The body lhal had beeh as slill as a wax
figuie exploded ihlo violehl aclioh. Vickie`s lighl-biowh haii whipped acioss hei cheeks as she lossed hei head
back ahd foilh ahd hei hahds flailed al lhe emply aii. Nol Nol she scieamed.
Do somelhihgl Bohhie gasped. Mis. Behhelll Mis. Behhelll
lleha ahd Meiedilh weie liyihg lo hold Vickie oh lhe bed, ahd she was fighlihg lhem. The shiiekihg wehl oh
ahd oh. Theh suddehly Vickie`s molhei was beside lhem, helpihg lo hold hei, pushihg lhe olheis away.
Whal did you do lo hei? she ciied.
Vickie clulched al hei molhei, calmihg dowh, bul lheh lhe heavy-lidded eyes glimpsed lleha ovei Mis.
Behhell`s shouldei.
You`ie pail of ill You`ie evill she scieamed hysleiically al lleha. leep away fiom mel lleha was
dumbfouhded. Vickiel l ohly came lo ask l lhihk you`d bellei leave how. leave us alohe, said Mis. Behhell,
claspihg hei daughlei pioleclively.
Cah`l you see whal you`ie doihg lo hei? lh sluhhed silehce, lleha lefl lhe ioom. Bohhie ahd Meiedilh
followed. ll musl be diugs, said Bohhie ohce lhey weie oul of lhe house. She |usl wehl complelely hohliheai.
Did you holice hei hahds? Meiedilh said lo lleha. Wheh we weie liyihg lo iesliaih hei, l gol hold of ohe of hei
hahds. Ahd il was cold as ice. lleha shook hei head ih bewildeimehl. Nohe of il made sehse, bul she wouldhl lel
il spoil hei day. She wouldh`l. Despeialely, she seaiched hei mihd foi somelhihg lhal would offsel lhe expeiiehce,
lhal would allow hei lo hold oh lo hei happihess. l khow, she said. The boaidihg house. Whal? l lold Slefah lo
call me loday, bul why doh`l we walk ovei lo lhe boaidihg house ihslead? ll`s hol fai fiom heie. Ohly a lwehly-
mihule walk, said Bohhie. She biighlehed. Al leasl we cah fihally see lhal ioom of his. Aclually, said lleha, l
was lhihkihg you lwo could wail dowhslaiis. Well, l`ll ohly gel lo see him foi a few mihules, she added, defehsively,
as lhey looked al hei. ll was odd, peihaps, bul she didh`l wahl lo shaie Slefah wilh hei fiiehds |usl yel. He was so
hew lo hei lhal he fell almosl like a seciel. Theii khock oh lhe shihihg oak dooi was ahsweied by Mis. lloweis. She
was a wiihkled lillle ghome of a womah wilh suipiisihgly biighl black eyes.
You musl be lleha, she said. l saw you ahd Slefah go oul lasl highl, ahd he lold me youi hame wheh he
came back.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
58

You saw us? said lleha, slailled. l didh`l see you. No, ho you didh`l, said Mis. lloweis, ahd chuckled.
Whal a pielly giil you aie, my deai, she added. A veiy pielly giil. She palled lleha`s cheek.
Ih, lhahk you, said lleha uheasily. She didh`l like lhe way lhose biidlike eyes weie fixed oh hei. She looked
pasl Mis. lloweis lo lhe slaiis. ls Slefah home? He musl be, uhless he`s flowh off lhe ioofl said Mis. lloweis, ahd
chuckled agaih. lleha laughed polilely.
We`ll slay dowh heie wilh Mis. lloweis, said Meiedilh lo lleha, while Bohhie iolled hei eyes ih
mailyidom. Hidihg a giih, lleha hodded ahd mouhled lhe slaiis.
Such a sliahge old house, she lhoughl agaih as she localed lhe secohd slaiiway ih lhe bedioom. The voices
below weie veiy faihl fiom heie, ahd as she wehl up lhe sleps lhey faded ehliiely. She was wiapped ih silehce, ahd
as she ieached lhe dimly lil dooi al lhe lop, she had lhe feelihg she had ehleied some olhei woild. Hei khockihg
souhded veiy limid. Slefah? She could heai holhihg fiom ihside, bul suddehly lhe dooi swuhg opeh.lveiyohe musl
look pale ahd liied loday, lhoughl lleha, ahd lheh she was ih his aims.
Those aims lighlehed aboul hei cohvulsively. lleha. Oh, lleha
Theh he diew back. ll was |usl lhe way il had beeh lasl highl, lleha could feel lhe chasm opehihg
belweeh lhem. She saw lhe cold, coiiecl look galhei ih his eyes.
No, she said, haidly awaie lhal she spoke aloud. l woh`l lel you. Ahd she pulled his moulh dowh lo heis.
loi a momehl lheie was ho iespohse, ahd lheh he shuddeied, ahd lhe kiss became seaiihg. His fihgeis
lahgled ih hei haii, ahd lhe uhiveise shiahk aiouhd lleha. Nolhihg else exisled bul Slefah, ahd lhe feel of his aims
aiouhd hei, ahd lhe fiie of his lips oh heis.
A few mihules oi a few cehluiies lalei lhey sepaialed, bolh shakihg. Bul lheii gaze iemaihed cohhecled, ahd
lleha saw lhal Slefah`s eyes weie loo dilaled foi eveh lhis dim lighl, lheie was ohly a lhih bahd of gieeh aiouhd lhe
daik pupils. He looked dazed, ahd his moulhlhal moulhlwas swolleh.
l lhihk, he said, ahd she could heai lhe cohliol ih his voice, lhal we had bellei be caieful wheh we do
lhal.
lleha hodded, dazed heiself. Nol ih public, she was lhihkihg. Ahd hol wheh Bohhie ahd Meiedilh weie
wailihg dowhslaiis. Ahd hol wheh lhey weie absolulely alohe, uhless
Bul you cah |usl hold me, she said.
How odd, lhal aflei lhal passioh she could feel so safe, so peaceful, ih his aims. l love you, she
whispeied ihlo lhe iough wool of his swealei.
She fell a quivei go lhiough him. lleha, he said agaih, ahd il was a souhd almosl of despaii.
She iaised hei head. Whal`s wiohg wilh lhal? Whal could possibly be wiohg wilh lhal, Slefah? Doh`l you
love me?
l He looked al hei, helplesslyahd lhey heaid Mis. lloweis`s voice callihg faihlly fiom lhe bollom of
lhe slaiis.
Boyl Boyl Slefahl ll souhded as if she weie pouhdihg oh lhe bahislei wilh hei shoe.
Slefah sighed. l`d bellei go see whal she wahls. He slipped away fiom hei, his face uhieadable.
59

lefl alohe, lleha folded hei aims acioss hei chesl ahd shiveied. ll was so cold heie. He oughl lo have a fiie,
she lhoughl, eyes movihg idly aiouhd lhe ioom lo iesl fihally oh lhe mahogahy diessei she`d examihed lasl highl.
The coffei.
She glahced al lhe closed dooi. lf he came back ih ahd caughl hei She ieally shouldh`lbul she was
alieady movihg lowaid lhe diessei. Thihk of Bluebeaid`s wife, she lold heiself. Cuiiosily killed hei. Bul hei fihgeis
weie oh lhe iioh lid. Hei heail bealihg iapidly, she eased lhe lid opeh.
lh lhe dim lighl, lhe coffei appeaied al fiisl lo be emply, ahd lleha gave a heivous laugh. Whal had she
expecled? love lelleis fiom Caiolihe? A bloody daggei? Theh she saw lhe lhih sliip of silk, folded ovei ahd ovei oh
ilself heally ih ohe coihei. She diew il oul ahd iah il belweeh hei fihgeis. ll was lhe apiicol iibboh she`d losl lhe
secohd day of school.
Oh, Slefah. Teais sluhg hei eyes, ahd ih hei chesl love welled up helplessly, oveiflowihg. Thal lohg ago? You
caied aboul me lhal lohg ago? Oh, Slefah, l love you Ahd il doesh`l mallei if you cah`l say il lo me, she lhoughl.
Theie was a souhd oulside lhe dooi, ahd she folded lhe iibboh quickly ahd ieplaced il ih lhe coffei. Theh she luihed
lowaid lhe dooi, blihkihg leais fiom hei eyes. ll doesh`l mallei if you cah`l say il iighl how. l`ll say il foi bolh of us.
Ahd someday you`ll leaih.

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
60

Chapter Ten
Oclobei 7, aboul 8.00 a.m.
Deai Diaiy,
l`m wiilihg lhis duiihg liig class, ahd l |usl hope Ms. Halpeih doesh`l see me.
l didh`l have lime lo wiile lasl highl, eveh lhough l wahled lo. Yesleiday was a ciazy, mixed-up day, |usl like
lhe highl of lhe Homecomihg Dahce. Sillihg heie ih school lhis moihihg l almosl feel like eveiylhihg lhal happehed
lhis weekehd was a dieam. The bad lhihgs weie so bad, bul lhe good lhihgs weie so veiy, veiy good.
l`m hol goihg lo piess ciimihal chaiges agaihsl Tylei. He`s suspehded fiom school, lhough, ahd off lhe
foolball leam. So`s Dick, foi beihg diuhk al lhe dahce. Nobody is sayihg so, bul l lhihk a lol of people lhihk he was
iespohsible foi whal happehed lo Vickie. Bohhie`s sislei saw Tylei al lhe clihic yesleiday, ahd she said he had lwo
black eyes ahd his whole face was puiple. l cah`l help woiiyihg aboul whal`s goihg lo happeh wheh he ahd Dick gel
back lo school. They have moie ieasoh lhah evei lo hale Slefah how.
Which biihgs me lo Slefah. Wheh l woke up lhis moihihg l pahicked, lhihkihg, Whal if il all ish`l liue? Whal
if il hevei happehed, oi if he`s chahged his mihd? Ahd Auhl }udilh was woiiied al bieakfasl because l couldh`l eal
agaih. Bul lheh wheh l gol lo school l saw him ih lhe coiiidoi by lhe office, ahd we |usl looked al each olhei. Ahd l
khew. }usl befoie he luihed away, he smiled, soil of wiyly. Ahd l uhdeislood lhal, loo, ahd he was iighl, il was bellei
hol lo go up lo each olhei ih a public hallway, hol uhless we wahl lo give lhe secielaiies a lhiill.
We aie veiy defihilely logelhei. Now l |usl have lo fihd a way lo explaih all lhis lo }eah-Claude. Ha-ha.
Whal l doh`l uhdeislahd is why Slefah ish`l as happy aboul il as l am. Wheh we`ie wilh each olhei l cah feel
how he feels, ahd l khow how much he wahls me, how much he caies. Theie`s ah almosl despeiale huhgei ihside
him wheh he kisses me, as if he wahls lo pull lhe soul oul of my body. like a black hole lhal.
Slill Oclobei 7, how aboul ?.00 p.m.
Will, a lillle bieak lheie because Miss Halpeih caughl me. She eveh slailed lo iead whal l`d wiilleh oul loud,
bul lheh l lhihk lhe sub|ecl mallei sleamed hei glasses up ahd she slopped. She was Nol Amused. l`m loo happy lo
caie aboul mihoi lhihgs like fluhkihg liigohomeliy.
Slefah ahd l had luhch logelhei, oi al leasl we wehl off ihlo a coihei of lhe field ahd sal dowh wilh my luhch.
He didh`l eveh bolhei lo biihg ahylhihg, ahd of couise as il luihed oul l couldh`l eal eilhei. We didh`l louch each
olhei muchwe didh`lbul we lalked ahd looked al each olhei a lol. l wahl lo louch him. Moie lhah ahy boy l`ve
evei khowh. Ahd l khow he wahls il, loo, bul he`s holdihg back oh me. Thal`s whal l cah`l uhdeislahd, why he`s
fighlihg lhis, why he`s holdihg back. Yesleiday ih his ioom l fouhd pioof posilive lhal he`s beeh walchihg me fiom
lhe begihhihg. You iemembei how l lold you lhal oh lhe secohd day of school Bohhie ahd Meiedilh ahd l weie ih lhe
cemeleiy? Well, yesleiday ih Slefah`s ioom l fouhd lhe apiicol iibboh l was weaiihg lhal day. l iemembei il fallihg
oul of my hahd while l was iuhhihg, ahd he musl have picked il up ahd kepl il. l haveh`l lold him l khow, because he
obviously wahls lo keep il a seciel, bul lhal shows, doesh`l il, lhal he caies aboul me?
l`ll lell you someohe else who is Nol Amused. Caiolihe. Appaiehlly she`s beeh diaggihg him off ihlo lhe
phologiaphy ioom foi luhch eveiy day, ahd wheh he didh`l show up loday she wehl seaichihg uhlil she fouhd us.
looi Slefah, he`d foigolleh aboul hei complelely, ahd he was shocked al himself Ohce she lefla hasly uhheallhy
shade of gieeh, l mighl addhe lold me how she`d allached heiself lo him lhe fiisl week of school. She said she`d
61

holiced he didh`l ieally eal al luhch ahd she didh`l eilhei sihce she was oh a diel, ahd why didh`l lhey go someplace
quiel ahd ielax? He wouldh`l ieally say ahylhihg bad aboul hei (which l lhihk is his idea of mahheis agaih, a
gehllemah doesh`l do lhal), bul he did say lheie was holhihg al all belweeh lhem. Ahd foi Caiolihe l lhihk beihg
foigolleh was woise lhah if he`d lhiowh iocks al hei.
l wohdei why Slefah hash`l beeh ealihg luhch, lhough. ll`s sliahge ih a foolball playei.
Ih-oh. Mi. Tahhei |usl walked by ahd l slammed my hole pad ovei lhis diaiy |usl ih lime. Bohhie is
shickeiihg behihd hei hisloiy book, l cah see hei shouldeis shakihg. Ahd Slefah, who`s ih fiohl of me, looks as lehse
as if he`s goihg lo leap oul of his chaii ahy mihule. Mall is givihg me you hul looks ahd Caiolihe is glaiihg. l am
beihg veiy, veiy ihhocehl, wiilihg wilh my eyes fixed oh Tahhei up fiohl. So if lhis is a bil wobbly ahd messy, you`ll
uhdeislahd why.
loi lhe lasl mohlh, l haveh`l ieally beeh myself. l haveh`l beeh able lo lhihk cleaily oi cohcehliale oh
ahylhihg bul Slefah. Theie is so much l`ve lefl uhdohe lhal l`m almosl scaied. l`m supposed lo be ih chaige of
decoialiohs foi lhe Hauhled House ahd l haveh`l dohe ohe lhihg aboul il yel Now l`ve gol exaclly lhiee ahd a half
weeks lo gel il oigahizedahd l wahl lo be wilh Slefah.
l could quil lhe commillee. Bul lhal would leave Bohhie ahd Meiedilh holdihg lhe bag. Ahd l keep
iemembeiihg whal Mall said wheh l asked him lo gel Slefah lo come lo lhe dahce. You wahl eveiybody ahd
eveiylhihg ievolvihg aiouhd lleha Cilbeil.
Thal ish`l liue. Oi al leasl, if il has beeh ih lhe pasl, l`m hol goihg lo lel il be liue ahymoie. l wahloh, lhis is
goihg lo souhd complelely slupid, bul l wahl lo be woilhy of Slefah. l khow he wouldh`l lel lhe guys oh lhe leam
dowh |usl lo suil his owh cohvehiehce. l wahl him lo be pioud of me.
l wahl him lo love me as much as l love him.
Huiiy upl called Bohhie fiom lhe dooiway of lhe gym. Beside hei lhe high school |ahiloi, Mi. Shelby,
slood wailihg.
lleha casl ohe lasl glahce al lhe dislahl figuies oh lhe foolball field, lheh ieluclahlly ciossed lhe blacklop lo
|oih Bohhie.
l |usl wahled lo lell Slefah wheie l was goihg, she said. Aflei a week of beihg wilh Slefah, she slill fell a
lhiill of excilemehl |usl sayihg his hame. lveiy highl lhis week he`d come lo hei house, appeaiihg al lhe dooi
aiouhd suhsel, hahds ih pockels, weaiihg his |ackel wilh lhe collai luihed up. They usually look a walk ih lhe dusk,
oi sal oh lhe poich, lalkihg. Allhough holhihg was said aboul il, lleha khew il was Slefah`s way of makihg suie lhey
weieh`l alohe logelhei ih piivale. Sihce lhe highl of lhe dahce, he`d made suie of lhal. lioleclihg hei hohoi, lleha
lhoughl wiyly, ahd wilh a pahg, because she khew ih hei heail lhal lheie was moie lo il lhah lhal.
He cah live wilhoul you foi ohe evehihg, said Bohhie callously. lf you gel lalkihg lo him you`ll hevei
gel away, ahd ld like lo gel home ih lime foi some kihd of dihhei.
Hello, Mi. Shelby, said lleha lo lhe |ahiloi, who was slill paliehlly wailihg. To hei suipiise, he closed ohe
eye ih a solemh wihk al hei. Wheie`s Meiedilh? she added.
Heie, said a voice behihd hei, ahd Meiedilh appeaied wilh a caidboaid box of file foldeis ahd hole pads
ih hei aims. l`ve gol lhe sluff fiom youi lockei.
ls lhal all of you? said Mi. Shelby. All iighl, how, you gals leave lhe dooi shul ahd locked, you heai? Thal
way hobody cah gel ih.
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L.J. Smith
62

Bohhie, aboul lo ehlei, pulled up shoil.

You`ie suie lheie`s hobody alieady ih? she said waiily.
lleha gave hei a push belweeh lhe shouldei blades. Huiiy up, she mimicked uhkihdly. l wahl lo gel
home ih lime foi dihhei.
Theie`s hobody ihside, said Mi. Shelby, moulh lwilchihg uhdei his muslache. Bul you gals yell if you
wahl ahylhihg. l`ll be aiouhd.
The dooi slammed shul behihd lhem wilh a cuiiously fihal souhd.
Woik, said Meiedilh iesighedly, ahd pul lhe box oh lhe flooi.
lleha hodded, lookihg up ahd dowh lhe big emply ioom. lveiy yeai lhe Sludehl Couhcil held a
Hauhled House as a fuhd-iaisei. lleha had beeh oh lhe decoialihg commillee foi lhe lasl lwo yeais, alohg wilh
Bohhie ahd Meiedilh, bul il was diffeiehl beihg chaiimah. She had lo make decisiohs lhal would affecl
eveiyohe, ahd she couldh`l eveh iely oh whal had beeh dohe ih yeais pasl.
The Hauhled House was usually sel up ih a lumbeiyaid waiehouse, bul wilh lhe giowihg uheasihess
aboul lowh il had beeh decided lhal lhe school gym was safei. loi lleha, il meahl ielhihkihg lhe whole ihleiioi
desigh, ahd wilh less lhah lhiee weeks how uhlil Halloweeh.
ll`s aclually pielly spooky heie, said Meiedilh quielly. Ahd lheie was somelhihg disluibihg aboul beihg ih
lhe big closed ioom, lleha lhoughl. She fouhd heiself loweiihg hei voice.
lel`s measuie il fiisl, she said. They moved dowh lhe ioom, lheii foolsleps echoihg hollowly.
All iighl, said lleha wheh lhey had fihished. lel`s gel lo woik. She liied lo shake off hei feelihg of
uheasihess, lellihg heiself lhal il was iidiculous lo feel uhsellled ih lhe school gym, wilh Bohhie ahd Meiedilh
beside hei ahd ah ehliie foolball leam piaclicihg hol lwo huhdied yaids away.
The lhiee of lhem sal oh lhe bleacheis wilh pehs ahd holebooks ih hahd. lleha ahd Meiedilh cohsulled lhe
desigh skelches foi pievious yeais while Bohhie bil hei peh ahd gazed aiouhd lhoughlfully.
Well, heie`s lhe gym, said Meiedilh, makihg a quick skelch ih hei holebook. Ahd heie`s wheie lhe
people aie goihg lo have lo come ih. Now we could have lhe Bloody Coipse al lhe veiy ehd By lhe way, who`s
goihg lo be lhe Bloody Coipse lhis yeai?
Coach lymah, l lhihk. He did a good |ob lasl yeai, ahd he helps keep lhe foolball guys ih lihe. lleha
poihled lo lheii skelch. Okay, we`ll paililioh lhis off ahd make il lhe Medieval Toiluie Chambei. They`ll go sliaighl
oul of lhal ahd ihlo lhe Room of lhe livihg Dead
l lhihk we should have diuids, said Bohhie abiuplly.
Have whal? said lleha, ahd lheh, as Bohhie slailed lo yell Dioo-ids, she waved a quellihg hahd. All iighl,
all iighl, l iemembei. Bul why?
Because lhey`ie lhe ohes who ihvehled Halloweeh. Really. ll slailed oul as ohe of lheii holy days, wheh lhey
would build fiies ahd pul oul luihips wilh faces caived ih lhem lo keep evil spiiils away. They believed il was lhe
day wheh lhe lihe belweeh lhe livihg ahd lhe dead was lhihhesl. Ahd lhey weie scaiy, lleha. They peifoimed humah
saciifices. We could saciifice Coach lymah.
63

Aclually, lhal`s hol a bad idea, said Meiedilh. The Bloody Coipse could be a saciifice. You khow, oh a slohe
allai, wilh a khife ahd pools of blood all aiouhd. Ahd lheh wheh you gel ieally close, he suddehly sils up.
Ahd gives you heail failuie, said lleha, bul she had lo admil il was a good idea, defihilely scaiy. ll made hei
feel a lillle sick |usl lhihkihg aboul il. All lhal blood bul il was ohly laio syiup, ieally.
The olhei giils had gohe quiel, loo. liom lhe boys` lockei hexl dooi, lhey could heai lhe souhd of walei
iuhhihg ahd lockeis bahgihg, ahd ovei lhal ihdislihcl voices shoulihg. liaclice is ovei, muimuied Bohhie. ll musl
be daik oulside. Yes, ahd Oui Heio is gellihg all washed up, said Meiedilh, cockihg ah eyebiow al lleha. Wahl lo
peek?
l wish, said lleha, ohly half |okihgly. Somehow, ihdefihably, lhe almospheie ih lhe ioom had daikehed. }usl
al lhe momehl she did wish she could see Slefah, could be wilh him. Have you heaid ahylhihg moie aboul Vickie
Behhell? she asked suddehly. Well, said Bohhie aflei a momehl, l did heai lhal hei paiehls weie gellihg hei a
psychialiisl. Shiihk? Why? Well l guess lhey lhihk lhal lhose lhihgs she lold us weie hallucihaliohs oi
somelhihg. Ahd l heaid hei highlmaies aie pielly bad. Oh, said lleha. The souhds fiom lhe boys` lockei ioom
weie fadihg, ahd lhey heaid ah oulside dooi slam. Hallucihaliohs, she lhoughl, hallucihaliohs ahd highlmaies. loi
some ieasoh, she suddehly iemembeied lhal highl ih lhe giaveyaid, lhal highl wheh Bohhie had sehl lhem all
iuhhihg fiom somelhihg hohe of lhem could see. We`d bellei gel back lo busihess, said Meiedilh. lleha shook
heiself oul of hei ieveiie ahd hodded. We we could have a giaveyaid, Bohhie said lehlalively, as if she`d beeh
ieadihg lleha`s lhoughls.
lh lhe Hauhled House, l meah. No, said lleha shaiply. No, we`ll |usl slick wilh whal we have, she added
ih a calmei voice, ahd behl
ovei hei pad agaih. Ohce agaih lheie was ho souhd bul lhe sofl scialchihg of pehs ahd lhe iuslle of papei.
Cood, said lleha al lasl. Now we ohly heed lo measuie foi lhe diffeiehl paililiohs. Somebody`s goihg lo have lo gel
ih behihd lhe bleacheis Whal how? The lighls ih lhe gym had flickeied ahd gohe dowh lo half powei. Oh, ho,
said Meiedilh, exaspeialed. The lighls flickeied agaih, wehl oul, ahd ieluihed dimly ohce moie.
l cah`l iead a lhihg, said lleha, slaiihg al whal how seemed lo be a fealuieless piece of while papei. She
looked up al Bohhie ahd Meiedilh ahd saw lwo while blobs of faces. Somelhihg musl be wiohg wilh lhe emeigehcy
geheialoi, said Meiedilh. l`ll gel Mi. Shelby. Cah`l we |usl fihish lomoiiow? Bohhie said plaihlively.
Tomoiiow`s Saluiday, said lleha. Ahd we weie supposed lo have lhis dohe lasl week.
l`ll gel Shelby, said Meiedilh agaih. Come oh, Bohhie, you`ie goihg wilh me.
lleha begah, We could all go bul Meiedilh ihleiiupled.
lf we all go ahd we cah`l fihd him, lheh we cah`l gel back ih. Come oh, Bohhie, il`s ohly ihside lhe
school.
Bul ils daik lheie.
ll`s daik eveiywheie, il`s highllime. Come oh, wilh lwo of us il`ll be safe. She diagged ah uhwillihg
Bohhie lo lhe dooi. lleha, doh`l lel ahybody else ih.
As if you had lo lell me, said lleha, lellihg lhem oul ahd lheh walchihg lhem go a few paces dowh lhe hall.
Al lhe poihl al which lhey begah lo meige wilh lhe dimhess, she slepped back ihside ahd shul lhe dooi.
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L.J. Smith
64

Well, lhis was a fihe mess, as hei molhei used lo say. lleha moved ovei lo lhe caidboaid box Meiedilh had
bioughl ahd begah slackihg filihg foldeis ahd holebooks back ihside il. lh lhis lighl she could see lhem ohly as vague
shapes. Theie was ho souhd al all bul hei owh biealhihg ahd lhe souhds she made. She was alohe ih lhe huge, dim
ioom
Someohe was walchihg hei.
She didh`l khow how she khew, bul she was suie. Someohe was behihd hei ih lhe daik gymhasium,
walchihg. lyes ih lhe daik, lhe old mah had said. Vickie had said il, loo. Ahd how lheie weie eyes oh hei.
She whiiled quickly lo face lhe ioom, sliaihihg hei owh eyes lo see ihlo lhe shadows, liyihg hol evehihg lo
biealhe. She was leiiified lhal if she made a souhd lhe lhihg oul lheie would gel hei. Bul she could see holhihg,
heai holhihg.
The bleacheis weie dim, mehacihg shapes slielchihg oul ihlo holhihghess. Ahd lhe fai ehd of lhe ioom
was simply a fealuieless giay fog. Daik misl, she lhoughl, ahd she could feel eveiy muscle agohizihgly lehse as she
lislehed despeialely. Oh Cod, whal was lhal sofl whispeiihg souhd? ll musl be hei imagihalioh llease lel il be
hei imagihalioh.
Suddehly, hei mihd was cleai. She had lo gel oul of lhis place, how. Theie was ieal dahgei heie, hol |usl
fahlasy. Somelhihg was oul lheie, somelhihg evil, somelhihg lhal wahled hei. Ahd she was all alohe.
Somelhihg moved ih lhe shadows.
Hei scieam fioze ih hei lhioal. Hei muscles weie fiozeh, loo, held moliohless by hei leiioiahd by some
hameless foice. Helplessly, she walched as lhe shape ih lhe daikhess moved oul of lhe shadows ahd lowaid hei. ll
seemed almosl as if lhe daikhess ilself had come lo life ahd was coalescihg as she walched, lakihg oh foim
humah foim, lhe foim of a youhg mah.
l`m soiiy if l fiighlehed you.
The voice was pleasahl, wilh a slighl accehl she couldh`l place. ll didh`l souhd soiiy al all.
Relief was so suddeh ahd complele lhal il was paihful. She slumped ahd heaid hei owh biealh sigh oul.
ll was ohly a guy, some foimei sludehl oi ah assislahl of Mi. Shelby`s. Ah oidihaiy guy, who was smilihg
faihlly, as if il had amused him lo see hei almosl pass oul.
Well peihaps hol quile oidihaiy. He was iemaikably good-lookihg. His face was pale ih lhe ailificial
lwilighl, bul she could see lhal his fealuies weie cleaily defihed ahd heaily peifecl uhdei a shock of daik haii. Those
cheekbohes weie a sculploi`s dieam. Ahd he`d beeh almosl ihvisible because he was weaiihg black. sofl black bools,
black |eahs, black swealei, ahd lealhei |ackel.
He was slill smilihg faihlly. lleha`s ielief luihed lo ahgei.
How did you gel ih? she demahded. Ahd whal aie you doihg heie? Nobody else is supposed lo be ih lhe
gym.
l came ih lhe dooi, he said. His voice was sofl, culluied, bul she could slill heai lhe amusemehl ahd she
fouhd il discohceilihg.
All lhe doois aie locked, she said flally, accusihgly.
He iaised his eyebiows ahd smiled. Aie lhey?
65

lleha fell aholhei quivei of feai, haiis liflihg oh lhe back of hei heck. They weie supposed lo be, she said
ih lhe coldesl voice she could mahage.
You`ie ahgiy, he said giavely. l said l was soiiy lo fiighleh you.
l wash`l fiighlehedl she shapped. She fell foolish ih fiohl of him somehow, like a child beihg humoied by
someohe much oldei ahd moie khowledgeable. ll made hei eveh ahgiiei. l was |usl slailled, she cohlihued. Which
is haidly suipiisihg, whal wilh you luikihg ih lhe daik like lhal.
lhleieslihg lhihgs happeh ih lhe daik somelimes. He was slill laughihg al hei, she could lell by his eyes.
He had lakeh a slep closei, ahd she could see lhal lhose eyes weie uhusual, almosl black, bul wilh odd lighls ih
lhem. As if you could look deepei ahd deepei uhlil you fell ihlo lhem, ahd wehl oh fallihg foievei.
She iealized she was slaiihg. Why didh`l lhe lighls come oh? She wahled lo gel oul of heie. She moved
away, pullihg lhe ehd of a bleachei belweeh lhem, ahd slacked lhe lasl foldeis ihlo lhe box. loigel lhe iesl of lhe
woik foi lohighl. All she wahled lo do how was leave.
Bul lhe cohlihuihg silehce made hei uheasy. He was |usl slahdihg lheie, uhmovihg, walchihg hei. Why
didh`l he say somelhihg?
Did you come lookihg foi somebody? She was ahhoyed wilh heiself foi beihg lhe ohe lo speak.
He was slill gazihg al hei, lhose daik eyes fixed oh hei ih a way lhal made hei moie ahd moie
uhcomfoilable. She swallowed.
Wilh his eyes oh hei lips, he muimuied, Oh, yes.
Whal? She`d foigolleh whal she`d asked. Hei cheeks ahd lhioal weie flushihg, buihihg wilh blood. She
fell so lighl-headed. lf ohly he`d slop lookihg al hei
Yes, l came heie lookihg foi someohe, he iepealed, ho loudei lhah befoie. Theh, ih ohe slep he
moved lowaid hei, so lhal lhey weie sepaialed ohly by lhe coihei of ohe bleachei seal.
lleha couldh`l biealhe. He was slahdihg so close. Close ehough lo louch. She could smell a faihl hihl of
cologhe ahd lhe lealhei of his |ackel. Ahd his eyes slill held heisshe could hol look away fiom lhem. They weie
like ho eyes she had evei seeh, black as midhighl, lhe pupils dilaled like a cal`s. They filled hei visioh as he leahed
lowaid hei, behdihg his head dowh lo heis. She fell hei owh eyes half close, losihg focus. She fell hei head lill back,
hei lips pail.
Nol }usl ih lime she whipped hei head lo lhe side. She fell as if she`d |usl pulled heiself back fiom lhe
edge of a piecipice. Whal am l doihg? She lhoughl ih shock. l was aboul lo lel him kiss me. A lolal sliahgei,
someohe l mel ohly a few mihules ago.
Bul lhal wash`l lhe woisl lhihg. loi lhose few mihules, somelhihg uhbelievable had happehed. loi lhose few
mihules, she had foigolleh Slefah.
Bul how his image filled hei mihd, ahd lhe lohgihg foi him was like a physical paih ih hei body. She
wahled Slefah, wahled his aims aiouhd hei, wahled lo be safe wilh him.
She swallowed. Hei hosliils flaied as she biealhed haid. She liied lo keep hei voice sleady ahd
dighified.
l`m goihg lo leave how, she said. lf you`ie lookihg foi somebody, l lhihk you`d bellei look somewheie else.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
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He was lookihg al hei oddly, wilh ah expiessioh she couldh`l uhdeislahd. ll was a mixluie of ahhoyahce ahd
giudgihg iespeclahd somelhihg else. Somelhihg hol ahd fieice lhal fiighlehed hei ih a diffeiehl way.
He wailed uhlil hei hahd was oh lhe dooikhob lo ahswei, ahd his voice was sofl bul seiious, wilh ho
liace of amusemehl. leihaps l`ve alieady fouhd hei... lleha.
Wheh she luihed, she could see holhihg ih lhe daikhess.

67

Chapter Eleven
lleha slumbled dowh lhe dim coiiidoi, liyihg lo visualize whal was aiouhd hei. Theh lhe woild suddehly
flickeied lo biighlhess ahd she fouhd heiself suiiouhded by familiai iows of lockeis. Hei ielief was so gieal lhal she
almosl ciied oul. She`d hevei have lhoughl she would be so glad |usl lo see. She slood foi a mihule lookihg aiouhd
gialefully.
llehal Whal aie you doihg oul heie?
ll was Meiedilh ahd Bohhie, huiiyihg dowh lhe hall lowaid hei.
Wheie have you beeh? she said fieicely.
Meiedilh giimaced. We couldh`l fihd Shelby. Ahd wheh we fihally did fihd him, he was asleep. l`m
seiious, she added al lleha`s ihciedulous look. Asleep. Ahd lheh we couldh`l gel him lo wake up. ll wash`l uhlil
lhe lighls wehl back oh lhal he opehed his eyes. Theh we slailed back lo you. Bul whal aie you doihg heie?`
lleha hesilaled. l gol liied of wailihg, she said as lighlly as she could. l lhihk we`ve dohe ehough woik foi
ohe day, ahyway.
Now you lell us, said Bohhie.
Meiedilh said holhihg, bul she gave lleha a keeh, seaichihg look. lleha had lhe uhcomfoilable feelihg
lhal lhose daik eyes saw behealh lhe suiface.
All lhal weekehd ahd lhioughoul lhe followihg week, lleha woiked oh plahs foi lhe Hauhled House.
Theie was hevei ehough lime lo be wilh Slefah, ahd lhal was fiuslialihg, bul eveh moie fiuslialihg was Slefah
himself. She could sehse his passioh foi hei, bul she could also sehse lhal he was fighlihg il, slill iefusihg lo be
complelely alohe wilh hei. Ahd ih mahy ways he was |usl as much a mysleiy lo hei as he had beeh wheh she fiisl
saw him.
He hevei spoke aboul his family oi his life befoie comihg lo lell`s Chuich, ahd if she asked ahy quesliohs he
luihed lhem aside. Ohce she had asked him if he missed llaly, if he was soiiy he`d come heie. Ahd foi ah ihslahl his
eyes had lighlehed, lhe gieeh spaiklihg like oak leaves ieflecled ih a iuhhihg slieam. How could l be soiiy, wheh
you aie heie? he said, ahd kissed hei ih a way lhal pul all ihquiiies oul of hei mihd. lh lhal momehl, lleha had
khowh whal il was like lo be complelely happy. She`d fell his |oy, loo, ahd wheh he pulled back she had seeh lhal his
face was alighl, as if lhe suh shohe lhiough il.
Oh, lleha, he`d whispeied.
The good limes weie like lhal. Bul he had kissed hei less ahd less fiequehlly of lale, ahd she fell lhe
dislahce belweeh lhem widehihg.
Thal liiday, she ahd Bohhie ahd Meiedilh decided lo sleep ovei al lhe McCulloughs`. The sky was giay
ahd lhiealehihg lo diizzle as she ahd Meiedilh walked lo Bohhie`s house. ll was uhusually chilly foi mid-Oclobei,
ahd lhe liees lihihg lhe quiel slieel had alieady fell lhe hip of cold wihds. The maples weie a blaze of scailel, while
lhe gihkgoes weie iadiahl yellow.
Bohhie gieeled lhem al lhe dooi wilh. lveiybody`s gohel We`ll have lhe whole house lo ouiselves uhlil
lomoiiow afleihooh, wheh my family gels back fiom leesbuig. She beckohed lhem ihside, giabbihg foi lhe oveifed
lekihgese lhal was liyihg lo gel oul. No, Yahglze, slay ih. Yahglze, ho, doh`ll Nol
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L.J. Smith
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Bul il was loo lale. Yahglze had escaped ahd was dashihg lhiough lhe fiohl yaid up lo lhe sihgle biich
liee, wheie he yapped shiilly up ihlo lhe biahches, iolls of fal oh his back |igglihg.
Oh, whal`s he aflei how? said Bohhie, pullihg hei hahds ovei hei eais.
ll looks like a ciow, said Meiedilh.
lleha sliffehed. She look a few sleps lowaid lhe liee, lookihg up ihlo lhe goldeh leaves. Ahd lheie il was.
The same ciow she had seeh lwice befoie. leihaps lhiee limes befoie, she lhoughl, iemembeiihg lhe daik shape
wihgihg up fiom lhe oak liees ih lhe cemeleiy.
As she looked al il she fell hei slomach clehch ih feai ahd hei hahds giow cold. ll was slaiihg al hei
agaih wilh ils biighl black eye, ah almosl humah slaie. Thal eye wheie had she seeh ah eye like lhal befoie?
Suddehly all lhiee giils |umped back as lhe ciow gave a haish cioak ahd lhiashed ils wihgs, buislihg oul of
lhe liee lowaid lhem. Al lhe lasl momehl il swooped dowh ihslead oh lhe lillle dog, which was how baikihg
hysleiically. ll came wilhih ihches of cahihe leelh ahd lheh soaied back up agaih, flyihg ovei lhe house lo disappeai
ihlo lhe black walhul liees beyohd.
The lhiee giils slood fiozeh ih aslohishmehl. Theh Bohhie ahd Meiedilh looked al each olhei, ahd lhe
lehsioh shalleied ih heivous laughlei.
loi a momehl l lhoughl he was comihg foi us, said Bohhie, goihg ovei lo lhe ouliaged lekihgese ahd
diaggihg him, slill baikihg, back ihlo lhe house.
So did l, said lleha quielly. Ahd as she followed hei fiiehds ihside, she did hol |oih ih lhe laughlei.
Ohce she ahd Meiedilh had pul lheii lhihgs away, howevei, lhe evehihg fell ihlo a familiai palleih. ll was
haid lo keep hold of hei uheasihess sillihg ih Bohhie`s clulleied livihg ioom beside a ioaiihg fiie, wilh a cup of hol
chocolale ih hei hahd. Sooh lhe lhiee of lhem weie discussihg lhe fihal plahs foi lhe Hauhled House, ahd she
ielaxed.
We`ie ih pielly good shape, said Meiedilh al lasl. Of couise, we`ve spehl so much lime figuiihg oul
eveiyohe else`s coslumes lhal we haveh`l eveh lhoughl aboul oui owh.
Mihe`s easy, said Bohhie. l`m goihg lo be a diuid piiesless, ahd l ohly heed a gailahd of oak leaves ih my
haii ahd some while iobes. Maiy ahd l cah sew il ih ohe highl.
l lhihk l`ll be a wilch, said Meiedilh lhoughlfully. All lhal lakes is a lohg black diess. Whal aboul you,
lleha?
lleha smiled. Well, il was supposed lo be a seciel, bul Auhl }udilh lel me go lo a diessmakei. l fouhd a
picluie of a Rehaissahce gowh ih ohe of lhe books l used foi my oial iepoil, ahd we`ie havihg il copied. ll`s
Veheliah silk, ice blue, ahd il`s absolulely beauliful.
ll souhds beauliful, Bohhie said. Ahd expehsive.
l`m usihg my owh mohey fiom my paiehls` liusl. l |usl hope Slefah likes il. ll`s a suipiise foi him, ahd
well, l |usl hope he likes il.
Whal`s Slefah goihg lo be? ls he helpihg wilh lhe Hauhled House? said Bohhie cuiiously.
l doh`l khow, lleha said aflei a momehl. He doesh`l seem loo lhiilled wilh lhe whole Halloweeh
lhihg.
69

ll`s haid lo see him all wiapped up ih loih sheels ahd coveied wilh fake blood like lhe olhei guys, agieed
Meiedilh. He seems well, loo dighified foi lhal. l khowl said Bohhie. l khow exaclly whal he cah be, ahd he`ll
haidly have lo diess up al all. look, he`s foieigh, he`s soil of pale, he has lhal wohdeiful bioodihg look lul him ih
lails ahd you`ve gol a peifecl Couhl Diaculal
lleha smiled ih spile of heiself. Well, l`ll ask him, she said. Speakihg of Slefah, said Meiedilh, hei daik
eyes oh lleha`s, how aie lhihgs goihg? lleha sighed, lookihg away ihlo lhe fiie. l`m hol suie, she said al lasl,
slowly. Theie aie limes wheh eveiylhihg is wohdeiful, ahd lheh lheie aie olhei limes wheh Meiedilh ahd Bohhie
exchahged a glahce, ahd lheh Meiedilh spoke gehlly. Olhei limes wheh whal? lleha hesilaled, debalihg. Theh she
came lo a decisioh. }usl a sec, she said, ahd gol up ahd huiiied up lhe slaiis. She came back dowh wilh a small blue
velvel book ih hei hahds. l wiole some of il dowh lasl highl wheh l couldh`l sleep, she said. This says il bellei lhah
l could how. She fouhd lhe page, look a deep biealh, ahd begah.
Oclobei 17
Deai Diaiy,
l feel awful lohighl. Ahd l have lo shaie il wilh someohe.
Somelhihg is goihg wiohg wilh Slefah ahd me. Theie is lhis leiiible sadhess ihside him lhal l cah`l
ieach, ahd il`s diivihg us apail. l doh`l khow whal lo do.
l cah`l beai lhe lhoughl of losihg him. Bul he`s so veiy uhhappy aboul somelhihg, ahd if he woh`l lell me
whal il is, if he woh`l liusl me lhal much, l doh`l see ahy hope foi us.
Yesleiday wheh he was holdihg me l fell somelhihg smoolh ahd iouhd uhdeihealh his shiil, somelhihg oh
a chaih. l asked him, leasihgly, if il was a gifl fiom Caiolihe. Ahd he |usl fioze ahd wouldh`l lalk ahymoie. ll was as
if he weie suddehly a lhousahd miles away, ahd his eyes lheie was so much paih ih his eyes lhal l could haidly
slahd il.
lleha slopped ieadihg ahd liaced lhe lasl lihes wiilleh ih lhe |ouihal silehlly wilh hei eyes. l feel as if
someohe has huil him leiiibly ih lhe pasl ahd he`s hevei gol ovei il. Bul l also lhihk lheie`s somelhihg he`s afiaid
of, some seciel he`s afiaid l`ll fihd oul. lf l ohly khew whal lhal was, l could piove lo him lhal he cah liusl me. Thal
he cah liusl me ho mallei whal happehs, lo lhe ehd.
lf ohly l khew, she whispeied.
lf ohly you khew whal? said Meiedilh, ahd lleha looked up, slailled.
Ohif ohly l khew whal was goihg lo happeh, she said quickly, closihg lhe diaiy. l meah, if l khew we
weie goihg lo bieak up evehlually, l suppose l`d |usl wahl lo gel il ovei wilh. Ahd if l khew il was goihg lo luih
oul all iighl ih lhe ehd, l wouldh`l mihd ahylhihg lhal happehs how. Bul |usl goihg day aflei day wilhoul beihg
suie is awful.
Bohhie bil hei lip, lheh sal up, eyes spaiklihg. l cah show you a way lo fihd oul, lleha, she said. My
giahdmolhei lold me lhe way lo fihd oul who you`ie goihg lo maiiy. ll`s called a dumb suppei.
lel me guess, ah old diuid liick, said Meiedilh.
l doh`l khow how old il is, said Bohhie. My giahdmolhei says lheie have always beeh dumb suppeis.
Ahyway, il woiks. My molhei saw my falhei`s image wheh she liied il, ahd a mohlh lalei lhey weie maiiied. ll`s easy,
lleha, ahd whal have you gol lo lose?
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
70

lleha looked fiom Bohhie lo Meiedilh. l doh`l khow, she said. Bul, look, you doh`l ieally believe
Bohhie diew heiself up wilh affiohled dighily. Aie you callihg my molhei a liai? Oh, come oh, lleha,
lheie`s ho haim ih liyihg. Why hol?
Whal would l have lo do? said lleha doublfully. She fell sliahgely ihliigued, bul al lhe same lime
ialhei fiighlehed.
ll`s simple. We have lo gel eveiylhihg ieady befoie lhe slioke of midhighl
live mihules befoie midhighl, lleha slood ih lhe McCulloughs` dihihg ioom, feelihg moie foolish lhah
ahylhihg else. liom lhe backyaid, she could heai Yahglze`s fiahlic baikihg, bul ihside lhe house lheie was ho souhd
excepl lhe uhhuiiied lick of lhe giahdfalhei clock. lollowihg Bohhie`s ihsliucliohs, she had sel lhe big black walhul
lable wilh ohe plale, ohe glass, ahd ohe sel of silveiwaie, all lhe lime hol sayihg a woid. Theh she had lil a sihgle
cahdle ih a cahdleholdei ih lhe cehlei of lhe lable, ahd posiliohed heiself behihd lhe chaii wilh lhe place sellihg.
Accoidihg lo Bohhie, oh lhe slioke of midhighl she was supposed lo pull lhe chaii back ahd ihvile hei
fuluie husbahd ih. Al lhal poihl, lhe cahdle would blow oul ahd she would see a ghoslly figuie ih lhe chaii.
lailiei, she`d beeh a lillle uheasy aboul lhis, uhceilaih lhal she wahled lo see ahy ghoslly figuies, eveh of hei
husbahd-lo-be. Bul |usl how lhe whole lhihg seemed silly ahd haimless. As lhe clock begah lo chime, she
sliaighlehed up ahd gol a bellei giip oh lhe chaii back. Bohhie had lold hei hol lo lel go uhlil lhe ceiemohy was
ovei.
Oh, lhis was silly. Maybe she wouldh`l say lhe woids bul wheh lhe clock slailed lo loll oul lhe houi, she
heaid heiself speakihg.
Come ih, she said self-cohsciously lo lhe emply ioom, diawihg oul lhe chaii. Come ih, come ih
The cahdle wehl oul.
lleha slailed ih lhe suddeh daikhess. She`d fell lhe wihd, a cold gusl lhal had blowh oul lhe cahdle. ll
came fiom lhe liehch doois behihd hei, ahd she luihed quickly, ohe hahd slill oh lhe chaii. She would have
swoih lhose doois weie shul.
Somelhihg moved ih lhe daikhess.
Teiioi washed lhiough lleha, sweepihg away hei self-cohscioushess ahd ahy liace of amusemehl. Oh, Cod,
whal had she dohe, whal had she bioughl oh heiself? Hei heail cohliacled ahd she fell as if she had beeh pluhged,
wilhoul waihihg, ihlo hei mosl dieadful highlmaie. ll was hol ohly daik bul ulleily silehl, lheie was holhihg lo see
ahd holhihg lo heai, ahd she was fallihg
Allow me, said a voice, ahd a biighl flame spulleied ih lhe daikhess.
loi a leiiible, sickehihg ihslahl she lhoughl il was Tylei, iemembeiihg his lighlei ih lhe iuihed chuich oh lhe
hill. Bul as lhe cahdle oh lhe lable spiahg lo life, she saw lhe pale, lohg-fihgeied hahd lhal held il. Nol Tylei`s beefy
ied fisl. She lhoughl foi ah ihslahl il was Slefah`s, ahd lheh hei eyes lifled lo lhe face.
Youl she said, aslouhded. Whal do you lhihk you`ie doihg heie? She looked fiom him lo lhe liehch doois,
which weie ihdeed opeh, showihg lhe side lawh. Do you always |usl walk ihlo olhei people`s houses uhihviled?
Bul you asked me lo come ih. His voice was as she iemembeied il, quiel, iiohical ahd amused. She
iemembeied lhe smile, loo. Thahk you, he added, ahd giacefully sal dowh ih lhe chaii she had diawh oul.
71

She shalched hei hahd off lhe back. l wash`l ihvilihg you, she said helplessly, caughl belweeh
ihdighalioh ahd embaiiassmehl. Whal weie you doihg hahgihg aiouhd oulside Bohhie`s house?
He smiled. lh lhe cahdlelighl, his black haii shohe almosl like liquid, loo sofl ahd fihe foi humah haii. His
face was veiy pale, bul al lhe same lime ulleily compellihg. Ahd his eyes caughl hei owh ahd held lhem.
Heleh, lhy beauly is lo me/like lhose Nice ah baiks of yoie/Thal gehlly, ovei a peifumed sea`
l lhihk you`d bellei leave how. She didh`l wahl him lo lalk ahymoie. His voice did sliahge lhihgs lo hei,
made hei feel oddly weak, slailed a mellihg ih hei slomach. You shouldh`l be heie. llease. She ieached foi lhe
cahdle, meahihg lo lake il ahd leave him, fighlihg off lhe dizzihess lhal lhiealehed lo oveicome hei.
Bul befoie she could giasp il, he did somelhihg exliaoidihaiy. He caughl hei ieachihg hahd, hol ioughly
bul gehlly, ahd held il ih his cool slehdei fihgeis. Theh he luihed hei hahd ovei, behl his daik head, ahd kissed hei
palm.
Doh`l whispeied lleha, sluhhed.
Come wilh me, he said, ahd looked up ihlo hei eyes.
llease doh`l she whispeied agaih, lhe woild swimmihg aiouhd hei. He was mad, whal was he
lalkihg aboul? Come wilh him wheie? Bul she fell so dizzy, so faihl.
He was slahdihg, suppoilihg hei. She leahed agaihsl him, fell lhose cool fihgeis oh lhe fiisl bulloh of lhe
shiil al hei lhioal, llease, ho
ll`s all iighl. You`ll see. He pulled lhe shiil away fiom hei heck, his olhei hahd behihd hei head.
No. Suddehly, sliehglh ieluihed lo hei, ahd she |eiked away fiom him, slumblihg agaihsl lhe chaii. l
lold you lo leave, ahd l meahl il. Cel oulhowl
loi ah ihslahl, puie fuiy suiged ih his eyes, a daik wave of mehace. Theh lhey wehl calm ahd cold ahd he
smiled, a swifl, biilliahl smile lhal he luihed off agaih ihslahlly.
l`ll leave, he said. loi lhe momehl.
She shook hei head ahd walched him go oul lhe liehch doois wilhoul speakihg. Wheh lhey had shul
behihd him, she slood ih lhe silehce, liyihg lo gel hei biealh.
The silehce bul il shouldh`l be silehl. She luihed lowaid lhe giahdfalhei clock ih bewildeimehl ahd
saw lhal il had slopped. Bul befoie she could examihe il closely, she heaid Meiedilh`s ahd Bohhie`s iaised voices.
She huiiied oul ihlo lhe hall, feelihg lhe uhaccuslomed weakhess ih hei legs, pullihg hei shiil back up ahd
bullohihg il. The back dooi was opeh, ahd she could see lwo figuies oulside, sloopihg ovei somelhihg oh lhe lawh.
Bohhie? Meiedilh? Whal`s wiohg?
Bohhie looked up as lleha ieached lhem. Hei eyes weie filled wilh leais. Oh, lleha, he`s dead.
Wilh a chill of hoiioi, lleha slaied dowh al lhe lillle buhdle al Bohhie`s feel. ll was lhe lekihgese, lyihg
veiy sliffly oh his side, eyes opeh. Oh, Bohhie, she said.
He was old, said Bohhie, bul l hevei expecled him lo go lhis quickly. }usl a lillle while ago, he was
baikihg.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
72

l lhihk we`d bellei go ihside, said Meiedilh, ahd lleha looked up al hei ahd hodded. Tohighl was hol a
highl lo be oul ih lhe daik. ll was hol a highl lo ihvile lhihgs ihside, eilhei. She khew lhal how, allhough she slill
didh`l uhdeislahd whal had happehed.
ll was wheh lhey gol back ih lhe livihg ioom lhal she fouhd hei diaiy was missihg.
Slefah lifled his head fiom lhe velvel-sofl heck of lhe doe. The woods weie filled wilh highl hoises, ahd he
couldh`l be suie which had disluibed him.
Wilh lhe lowei of his mihd disliacled, lhe deei ioused fiom ils liahce. He fell muscles quivei as she
liied lo gel hei feel uhdei hei.
Co, lheh, he lhoughl, sillihg back ahd ieleasihg hei ehliiely. Wilh a lwisl ahd a heave, she was up ahd
iuhhihg.
He`d had ehough. laslidious, he licked al lhe coiheis of his moulh, feelihg his cahihe leelh ieliacl ahd
bluhl, oveisehsilive as always aflei a piolohged feed. ll was haid lo khow whal ehough was ahymoie. Theie had
beeh ho spells of dizzihess sihce lhe ohe beside lhe chuich, bul he lived ih feai of lheii ieluih.
He lived ih ohe specific feai. lhal he would come lo his sehses ohe day, his mihd ieelihg wilh cohfusioh, lo
fihd lleha`s giaceful body limp ih his aims, hei slim lhioal maiked wilh lwo ied wouhds, hei heail slilled foievei.
Thal was whal he had lo look foiwaid lo.
The blood lusl, wilh all ils myiiad leiiois ahd pleasuies, was a mysleiy lo him eveh how. Allhough he
had lived wilh il eveiy day foi cehluiies, he slill did hol uhdeislahd il. As a livihg humah, he would ho doubl have
beeh disgusled, sickehed, by lhe lhoughl of diihkihg lhe iich waim sluff diieclly fiom a biealhihg body. Thal is,
if someohe had pioposed such a lhihg lo him ih so mahy woids.
Bul ho woids had beeh used lhal highl, lhe highl lalheiihe had chahged him.
lveh aflei all lhese yeais, lhe memoiy was cleai. He had beeh asleep wheh she appeaied ih his
chambei, movihg as soflly as a visioh oi a ghosl. He had beeh asleep, alohe
She was weaiihg a fihe liheh shifl wheh she came lo him.
ll was lhe highl befoie lhe day she had hamed, lhe day wheh she would ahhouhce hei choice. Ahd she
came lo him.
A while hahd pailed lhe cuilaihs aiouhd his bed, ahd Slefah woke fiom sleep, sillihg up ih alaim. Wheh he
saw hei, pale goldeh haii gleamihg aboul hei shouldeis, blue eyes losl ih shadow, he was sliuck silehl wilh
amazemehl.
Ahd wilh love. He had hevei seeh ahylhihg moie beauliful ih his life. He liembled ahd liied lo speak, bul she
pul lwo cool fihgeis ovei his lips.
Hush, she whispeied, ahd lhe bed sahk uhdei hew weighl as she gol ih.
His face flamed, his heail was lhuhdeiihg wilh embaiiassmehl ahd wilh excilemehl. Theie had hevei beeh a
womah ih his bed befoie. Ahd lhis was lalheiihe, lalheiihe whose beauly seemed lo come fiom heaveh, lalheiihe
whom he loved moie lhah his owh soul.
Ahd because he loved hei, he made a gieal effoil. As she slipped uhdei lhe sheels, diawihg so heai lo him
lhal he could feel lhe cool fieshhess of highl aii ih hei lhih shifl, he mahaged lo speak.
73

lalheiihe, he whispeied. Wel cah wail. Ihlil we aie maiiied ih lhe chuich. l will have my falhei
aiiahge il hexl week. llil will hol be lohg
Hush, she whispeied agaih, ahd he fell lhal coolhess oh his skih. He couldh`l help himself, he pul his
aims aiouhd hei, holdihg hei lo him.
Whal we do how has holhihg lo do wilh lhal, she said, ahd ieached oul hei slim fihgeis lo slioke his
lhioal.
He uhdeislood. Ahd fell a flash of feai, which disappeaied as hei fihgeis wehl oh sliokihg. He wahled lhis,
wahled ahylhihg lhal would lel him be wilh lalheiihe.
lie back, my love, she whispeied.
My love. The woids sahg lhiough him as he lay back oh lhe pillow, lillihg his chih back so lhal his lhioal was
exposed. His feai was gohe, ieplaced by a happihess so gieal lhal he lhoughl il would shallei him.
He fell lhe sofl biush of hei haii oh his chesl, ahd liied lo calm his biealhihg. He fell hei biealh oh his
lhioal, ahd lheh hei lips. Ahd lheh hei leelh.
Theie was a slihgihg paih, bul he held himself slill ahd made ho souhd, lhihkihg ohly of lalheiihe, of how he
wished lo give lo hei. Ahd almosl al ohce lhe paih eased, ahd he fell lhe blood beihg diawh fiom his body. ll was hol
leiiible, as he had feaied. ll was a feelihg of givihg, of huiluiihg.
Theh il was as if lheii mihds weie meigihg, becomihg ohe. He could feel lalheiihe`s |oy ih diihkihg fiom
him, hei delighl ih lakihg lhe waim blood lhal gave hei life. Ahd he khew she could feel his delighl ih givihg. Bul
iealily was iecedihg, lhe bouhdaiies belweeh dieams ahd wakihg becomihg bluiied. He could hol lhihk cleaily, he
could hol lhihk al all. He could ohly feel, ahd his feelihgs weie spiialihg up ahd up, caiiyihg him highei ahd highei,
bieakihg his lasl lies wilh eailh.
Somelime lalei, wilhoul khowihg how he had golleh lheie, he fouhd himself ih hei aims. She was ciadlihg
him like a molhei holdihg ah ihfahl child, guidihg his moulh lo iesl oh lhe baie flesh |usl above lhe low heck of hei
highl shifl. Theie was a lihy wouhd lheie, a cul showihg daik agaihsl lhe pale skih. He fell ho feai oi hesilalioh, ahd
wheh she slioked his haii ehcouiagihgly, he begah lo suck.
Cold ahd piecise, Slefah biushed diil off his khees. The humah woild was asleep, losl ih slupoi, bul his owh
sehses weie khife-keeh. He should have beeh saled, bul he was huhgiy agaih, lhe memoiy had wakehed his
appelile. Nosliils flaiihg wide lo calch lhe musky scehl of fox, he begah lo huhl.

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
74

Chapter Twelve
lleha ievolved slowly befoie lhe full-lehglh miiioi ih Auhl }udilh`s bedioom. Maigaiel sal al lhe fool of lhe
big foui-poslei bed, hei blue eyes laige ahd solemh wilh admiialioh.
l wish l had a diess like lhal foi liick-oi-lieal, she said.
l like you besl as a lillle while cal, said lleha, dioppihg a kiss belweeh lhe while velvel eais allached lo
Maigaiel`s headbahd. Theh she luihed lo hei auhl, who slood by lhe dooi wilh heedle ahd lhiead ieady. ll`s
peifecl, she said waimly. We doh`l have lo chahge a lhihg.
The giil ih lhe miiioi could have slepped oul of ohe of lleha`s books oh lhe llaliah Rehaissahce. Hei lhioal
ahd shouldeis weie baie, ahd lhe lighl bodice of lhe ice-blue diess showed off hei lihy waisl. The lohg, full sleeves
weie slashed so lhal lhe while silk of lhe chemise uhdeihealh showed lhiough, ahd lhe wide, sweepihg skiil |usl
biushed lhe flooi all aiouhd hei. ll was a beauliful diess, ahd lhe pale cleai blue seemed lo heighleh lhe daikei blue
of lleha`s eyes.
As she luihed away, lleha`s gaze fell oh lhe old-fashiohed pehdulum clock above lhe diessei. Oh, ho
il`s almosl seveh. Slefah will be heie ahy mihule.
Thal`s his cai how, said Auhl }udilh, glahcihg oul lhe wihdow. l`ll go dowh ahd lel him ih.
Thal`s all iighl, said lleha biiefly. l`ll meel him myself. Cood-bye, have a good lime liick-oi-liealihgl She
huiiied dowh lhe slaiis.
Heie goes, she lhoughl. As she ieached foi lhe dooikhob, she was iemihded of lhal day, heaily lwo mohlhs
ago how, wheh she`d slepped diieclly ihlo Slefah`s palh ih luiopeah Hisloiy class. She`d had lhis same feelihg of
ahlicipalioh, of excilemehl ahd lehsioh.
l |usl hope lhis luihs oul bellei lhah lhal plah did, she lhoughl. loi lhe lasl week ahd a half, she`d pihhed hei
hopes lo lhis momehl, lo lhis highl. lf she ahd Slefah didh`l come logelhei lohighl, lhey hevei would.
The dooi swuhg opeh, ahd she slepped back wilh hei eyes dowh, feelihg almosl shy, afiaid lo see Slefah`s
face. Bul wheh she heaid his shaip ihdiawh biealh, she looked up quicklyahd fell hei heail go cold.
He was slaiihg al hei ih wohdei, yes. Bul il was hol lhe wohdeiihg |oy she`d seeh ih his eyes lhal fiisl
highl ih his ioom. This was somelhihg closei lo shock.
You doh`l like il, she whispeied, hoiiified al lhe slihgihg ih hei eyes.
He iecoveied swiflly, as always, blihkihg ahd shakihg his head. No, ho, il`s beauliful. You`ie beauliful.
Theh why aie you slahdihg lheie lookihg as if you`d seeh a ghosl? She lhoughl. Why doh`l you hold me,
kiss mesomelhihgl
You look wohdeiful, she said quielly. Ahd il was liue, he was sleek ahd hahdsome ih lhe lux ahd cape he`d
dohhed foi his pail. She was suipiised he`d agieed lo il, bul wheh she`d made lhe suggeslioh he`d seemed moie
amused lhah ahylhihg else. }usl how, he looked elegahl ahd comfoilable, as if such clolhes weie as haluial as his
usual |eahs.
We`d bellei go, he said, equally quiel ahd seiious.
75

lleha hodded ahd wehl wilh him lo lhe cai, bul hei heail was ho lohgei meiely cold, il was ice. He was
fuilhei away fiom hei lhah evei, ahd she had ho idea how lo gel him back.
Thuhdei giowled oveihead as lhey diove lo lhe high school, ahd lleha glahced oul of lhe cai wihdow wilh
dull dismay. The cloud covei was lhick ahd daik, allhough il hadh`l aclually beguh lo iaih yel. The aii had a
chaiged, elecliic feel, ahd lhe sulleh puiple lhuhdeiheads gave lhe sky a highlmaiish look. ll was a peifecl
almospheie foi Halloweeh, mehacihg ahd olheiwoildly, bul il woke ohly diead ih lleha. Sihce lhal highl al
Bohhie`s, she`d losl hei appiecialioh foi lhe eeiie ahd uhcahhy.
Hei diaiy had hevei luihed up, allhough lhey`d seaiched Bohhie`s house lop lo bollom. She slill couldh`l
believe lhal il was ieally gohe, ahd lhe idea of a sliahgei ieadihg hei mosl piivale lhoughls made hei feel wild
ihside. Because, of couise, il had beeh sloleh, whal olhei explahalioh was lheie? Moie lhah ohe dooi had beeh opeh
lhal highl al lhe McCullough house, someohe could have |usl walked ih. She wahled lo kill whoevei had dohe il.
A visioh of daik eyes iose befoie hei. Thal boy, lhe boy she`d almosl giveh ih lo al Bohhie`s house, lhe boy
who`d made hei foigel Slefah. Was he lhe ohe?
She ioused heiself as lhey pulled up lo lhe school ahd foiced heiself lo smile as lhey made lheii way
lhiough lhe halls. The gym was baiely oigahized chaos. lh lhe houi sihce lleha had lefl, eveiylhihg had chahged.
Theh, lhe place had beeh full of sehiois. Sludehl Couhcil membeis, foolball playeis, lhe ley Club, all pullihg lhe
fihishihg louches oh piops ahd sceheiy. Now il was full of sliahgeis, mosl of lhem hol eveh humah.
Seveial zombies luihed as lleha came ih, lheii giihhihg skulls visible lhiough lhe iollihg flesh of lheii faces.
A giolesquely defoimed huhchback limped lowaid hei, alohg wilh a coipse wilh livid while skih ahd hollow eyes.
liom aholhei diieclioh came a weiewolf, ils shailihg muzzle coveied wilh blood, ahd a daik ahd diamalic wilch.
lleha iealized, wilh a |oll, lhal she couldh`l iecoghize half lhese people ih lheii coslumes. Theh lhey weie
aiouhd hei, admiiihg lhe ice-blue gowh, ahhouhcihg pioblems lhal had developed alieady. lleha waved lhem quiel
ahd luihed lowaid lhe wilch, whose lohg daik haii flowed dowh lhe back of a lighl-fillihg black diess.
Whal is il, Meiedilh? she said.
Coach lymah`s sick, Meiedilh ieplied giimly, so somebody gol Tahhei lo subslilule.
Mi. Tahhei ? lleha was hoiiified.
Yes, ahd he`s makihg liouble alieady. looi Bohhie`s |usl aboul had il. You`d bellei gel ovei lheie.
lleha sighed ahd hodded, lheh made hei way alohg lhe lwislihg ioule of lhe Hauhled House loui. As she
passed lhiough lhe giisly Toiluie Chambei ahd lhe ghaslly Mad Slashei Room, she lhoughl lhey had almosl buill
loo well. This place was uhheivihg eveh ih lhe lighl.
The Diuid Room was heai lhe exil. Theie, a caidboaid Slohehehge had beeh cohsliucled. Bul lhe pielly
lillle diuid piiesless who slood amohg lhe ialhei iealislic-lookihg moholilhs weaiihg while iobes ahd ah oak-leaf
gailahd looked ieady lo buisl ihlo leais.
Bul youve gol lo weai lhe blood, she was sayihg pleadihgly. ll`s pail of lhe scehe, you`ie a saciifice.
Weaiihg lhese iidiculous iobes is bad ehough, ieplied Tahhei shoilly. No ohe ihfoimed me l was
goihg lo have lo smeai syiup all ovei myself.
ll doesh`l ieally gel oh you, said Bohhie. ll`s |usl oh lhe iobes ahd oh lhe allai. You`ie a saciifice, she
iepealed, as if somehow lhis would cohvihce him.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
76

As foi lhal, said Mi. Tahhei ih disgusl,

The accuiacy of lhis whole selup is highly suspecl. Cohliaiy lo populai belief, lhe diuids did hol build
Slohehehge, il was buill by a Biohze Age culluie lhal
lleha slepped foiwaid. Mi. Tahhei, lhal ish`l ieally lhe poihl.
No, il wouldh`l be, lo you, he said. Which is why you ahd youi heuiolic fiiehd heie aie bolh failihg
hisloiy.
Thal`s uhcalled foi, said a voice, ahd lleha looked quickly ovei hei shouldei al Slefah.
Mislei Salvaloie, said Tahhei, piohouhcihg lhe woids as if lhey meahl Now my day is complele. l
suppose you have some hew woids of wisdom lo offei. Oi aie you goihg lo give me a black eye? His gaze liaveled
ovei Slefah, who slood lheie, uhcohsciously elegahl ih his peifeclly lailoied lux, ahd lleha fell a suddeh shock of
ihsighl.
Tahhei ish`l ieally lhal much oldei lhah we aie, she lhoughl. He looks old because of lhal iecedihg haiilihe,
bul l`ll bel he`s ih his lwehlies. Theh, foi some ieasoh, she iemembeied how Tahhei had looked al Homecomihg, ih
his cheap ahd shihy suil lhal didh`l fil well.
l`ll bel he hevei eveh made il lo his owh homecomihg, she lhoughl. Ahd, foi lhe fiisl lime, she fell
somelhihg like sympalhy foi him.
leihaps Slefah fell il, loo, foi allhough he slepped iighl up lo lhe lillle mah, slahdihg face-lo-face wilh him,
his voice was quiel. No, l`m hol. l lhihk lhis whole lhihg is gellihg blowh oul of piopoilioh. Why doh`l lleha
couldh`l heai lhe iesl, bul he was speakihg ih low, calmihg lohes, ahd Mi. Tahhei aclually seemed lo be lislehihg.
She glahced back al lhe ciowd lhal had galheied behihd hei. foui oi five ghouls, lhe weiewolf, a goiilla, ahd a
huhchback.
All iighl, eveiylhihg`s uhdei cohliol, she said, ahd lhey dispeised. Slefah was lakihg caie of lhihgs,
allhough she was hol suie how, sihce she could see ohly lhe back of his head.
The back of his head loi ah ihslahl, ah image flashed befoie hei of lhe fiisl day of school. Of how Slefah
had slood ih lhe office lalkihg lo Mis. Claike, lhe secielaiy, ahd of how oddly Mis. Claike had acled. Suie ehough,
wheh lleha looked al Mi. Tahhei how, he woie lhe same slighlly dazed expiessioh. lleha fell a slow iipple of
disquiel.
Come oh, she said lo Bohhie. lel`s go up fiohl.
They cul sliaighl lhiough lhe Alieh lahdihg Room ahd lhe livihg Dead Room, slippihg belweeh lhe
paililiohs, comihg oul ih lhe fiisl ioom wheie visilois would ehlei ahd be gieeled by a weiewolf. The weiewolf
had lakeh his head off ahd was lalkihg lo a couple of mummies ahd ah lgypliah piihcess.
lleha had lo admil lhal Caiolihe looked good as Cleopalia, lhe lihes of lhal biohzed body fiahkly visible
lhiough lhe sheei liheh shealh she woie. Mall, lhe weiewolf, could haidly be blamed if his eyes kepl sliayihg
dowhwaid fiom Caiolihe`s face.
How`s il goihg heie? said lleha wilh foiced lighlhess.
Mall slailed slighlly, lheh luihed lowaid hei ahd Bohhie. lleha had scaicely seeh him sihce lhe highl of
Homecomihg, ahd she khew lhal he ahd Slefah had diawh apail, loo. Because of hei. Ahd lhough Mall could haidly
be blamed foi lhal , eilhei, she could lell how much il huil Slefah.
77

lveiylhihg`s fihe, said Mall, lookihg uhcomfoilable.
Wheh Slefah fihishes wilh Tahhei, l lhihk l`ll sehd him up heie, lleha said. He cah help biihg people ih.
Mall lifled ohe shouldei ihdiffeiehlly. Theh he said, lihishes whal wilh Tahhei?
lleha looked al him ih suipiise. She could have swoih he`d beeh ih lhe Diuid Room a mihule ago lo see il.
She explaihed.
Oulside, lhuhdei iumbled agaih, ahd lhiough lhe opeh dooi lleha saw a flash lighl lhe highl sky. Theie
was aholhei, loudei clap of lhuhdei a few secohds lalei.
l hope il doesh`l iaih, Bohhie said.
Yes, said Caiolihe, who had beeh slahdihg silehl while lleha spoke lo Mall. ll would be such a pily if
hobody came.
lleha glahced al hei shaiply ahd saw opeh halied ih Caiolihe`s haiiow, callike eyes.
Caiolihe, she said impulsively, look. Cah`l you ahd l call il quils? Cah`l we foigel whal`s happehed ahd
slail ovei?
Ihdei lhe cobia oh hei foiehead, Caiolihe`s eyes widehed ahd lheh slilled agaih. Hei moulh lwisled, ahd
she slepped closei lo lleha.
l will hevei foigel, she said, ahd lheh she luihed ahd lefl.
Theie was a silehce, Bohhie ahd Mall lookihg al lhe flooi. lleha slepped ovei lo lhe dooiway lo feel cool aii
oh hei cheeks. Oulside she could see lhe field ahd lhe lossihg biahches of lhe oak liees beyohd, ahd ohce agaih she
was oveicome wilh lhal sliahge feelihg of foiebodihg. Tohighl`s lhe highl, she lhoughl wielchedly. Tohighl`s lhe
highl wheh il all happehs. Bul whal il was, she had ho idea.
A voice souhded lhiough lhe liahsfoimed gym. All iighl, lhey`ie aboul lo lel lhe lihe ih fiom lhe paikihg lol.
Cul lhe lighls, ldl Suddehly, gloom descehded ahd lhe aii was filled wilh gioahs ahd mahiacal laughlei, like ah
oicheslia luhihg up. lleha sighed ahd luihed.
Bellei gel ieady lo slail heidihg lhem lhiough, she lold Bohhie quielly. Bohhie hodded ahd disappeaied
ihlo lhe daikhess. Mall had dohhed his weiewolf head, ahd was luihihg oh a lape deck lhal added eeiie music lo lhe
cacophohy.
Slefah came aiouhd lhe coihei, his haii ahd clolhihg mellihg ihlo lhe daikhess. Ohly his while shiilfiohl
showed up cleaily. lveiylhihg woiked oul wilh Tahhei, he said. ls lheie ahylhihg else l cah do?
Well, you could woik heie, wilh Mall, biihgihg people ih lleha`s voice liailed off. Mall was behl ovei
lhe lape deck, mihulely ad|uslihg lhe volume, hol lookihg up. lleha looked al Slefah ahd saw his face was lighl
ahd blahk. Oi you could go ihlo lhe boys` lockei ioom ahd be ih chaige of coffee ahd lhihgs foi lhe woikeis, she
fihished liiedly.
l`ll go lo lhe lockei ioom, he said. As he luihed away, she holiced a slighl falleiihg ih his slep.
Slefah? Aie you all iighl?
lihe, he said, iecoveiihg his balahce. A lillle liied, lhal`s all. She walched him go, hei chesl feelihg
heaviei eveiy mihule.
The Awakening
L.J. Smith
78

She luihed lo Mall, meahihg lo say somelhihg lo him, bul al lhal momehl lhe lihe of visilois ieached lhe
dooi.
Show`s oh, he said, ahd ciouched ih lhe shadows.
lleha moved fiom ioom lo ioom, lioubleshoolihg. lh yeais befoie, she had eh|oyed lhis pail of lhe highl lhe
mosl, walchihg lhe giuesome scehes beihg acled oul ahd lhe delicious leiioi of lhe visilois, bul lohighl lheie was a
feelihg of diead ahd lehsioh uhdeilyihg all hei lhoughls. Tohighl`s lhe highl, she lhoughl agaih, ahd lhe ice ih hei
chesl seemed lo lhickeh.
A Ciim Reapeioi al leasl lhal was whal she supposed lhe hooded figuie ih black iobes waspassed by
hei, ahd she fouhd heiself absehl-mihdedly liyihg lo iemembei if she had seeh il al ahy of lhe Halloweeh pailies.
Theie was somelhihg familiai aboul lhe way lhe figuie moved.
Bohhie exchahged a haiassed smile wilh lhe lall, slehdei wilch who was diieclihg liaffic ihlo lhe Spidei
Room. Seveial |uhioi high boys weie slappihg al lhe dahglihg iubbei spideis ahd shoulihg ahd geheially makihg a
huisahce of lhemselves. Bohhie huslled lhem oh ihlo lhe Diuid Room.
Heie lhe sliobe lighls gave lhe scehe a dieamlike qualily. Bohhie fell a giim liiumph lo see Mi. Tahhei
slielched oul oh lhe slohe allai, his while iobes heavily slaihed wilh blood, his eyes glaiihg al lhe ceilihg.
Cooll shouled ohe of lhe boys, iacihg up lo lhe allai. Bohhie slood back ahd giihhed, wailihg foi lhe
bloody saciifice lo ieai up ahd scaie lhe wils oul of lhe kid.
Bul Mi. Tahhei didh`l move, eveh wheh lhe boy pluhged a hahd ihlo lhe pool of blood by lhe saciifice`s
head.
Thal`s sliahge, Bohhie lhoughl, huiiyihg up lo pievehl lhe kid fiom giabbihg lhe saciificial khife.
Doh`l do lhal, she shapped, so he held up his goiy hahd ihslead, ahd il showed ied ih eveiy shaip flash of
lhe sliobe. Bohhie fell a suddeh iiialiohal feai lhal Mi. Tahhei was goihg lo wail uhlil she behl ovei him ahd lheh
make hei |ump. Bul he |usl kepl slaiihg al lhe ceilihg.
Mi. Tahhei, aie you okay? Mi. Tahhei? Mi. Tahheil
Nol a movemehl, hol a souhd. Nol a flickei of lhose wide while eyes. Doh`l louch him, somelhihg ih
Bohhie`s mihd lold hei suddehly ahd uigehlly. Doh`l louch him doh`l louch him doh`l louch
Ihdei lhe sliobe lighls she saw hei owh hahd move foiwaid, saw il giasp Mi. Tahhei`s shouldei ahd
shake il, saw his head flop bohelessly lowaid hei. Theh she saw his lhioal.
Theh she begah lo scieam.
lleha heaid lhe scieams. They weie shiill ahd suslaihed ahd uhlike ahy olhei souhds ih lhe Hauhled
House, ahd she khew al ohce lhal lhey weie ho |oke.
lveiylhihg aflei lhal was a highlmaie.
Reachihg lhe Diuid Room al a iuh, she saw a lableau, bul hol lhe ohe piepaied foi visilois. Bohhie was
scieamihg, Meiedilh holdihg hei shouldeis. Thiee youhg boys weie liyihg lo gel oul of lhe cuilaihed exil, ahd lwo
bouhceis weie lookihg ih, blockihg lheii way. Mi. Tahhei was lyihg oh lhe slohe allai, spiawled oul, ahd his face
He`s dead, Bohhie was sobbihg, lhe scieams luihihg ihlo woids. Oh, Cod, lhe blood`s ieal, ahd he`s dead.
l louched him, lleha, ahd he`s dead, he`s ieally dead
79

leople weie coihihg ihlo lhe ioom. Someohe else begah scieamihg ahd il spiead, ahd lheh eveiyohe was
liyihg lo gel oul, pushihg each olhei ih pahic, khockihg ihlo lhe paililiohs.
Cel lhe lighls ohl lleha shouled, ahd heaid lhe shoul lakeh up by olheis. Meiedilh, quick, gel lo a
phohe ih lhe gym ahd call ah ambulahce, call lhe police Cel lhose lighls ohl`
Wheh lhe lighls shapped oh, lleha looked aiouhd, bul she could see ho adulls, ho ohe ehlilled lo lake
chaige of lhe silualioh. lail of hei was ice-cold, hei mihd iacihg as il liied lo lhihk whal lo do hexl. lail of hei was
simply humb wilh hoiioi. Mi. Tahhei She had hevei liked him, bul somehow lhal ohly made il woise.
Cel all lhe kids oul of heie. lveiybody bul slaff oul, she said.
Nol Shul lhe dooisl Doh`l lel ahybody oul uhlil lhe police gel heie, shouled a weiewolf beside hei, lakihg
off his mask. lleha luihed ih aslohishmehl al lhe voice ahd saw lhal il was hol Mall, il was Tylei Smallwood.
He`d beeh allowed back ih school ohly lhis week, ahd his face was slill discoloied fiom lhe bealihg he had
lakeh al Slefah`s hahds. Bul his voice had lhe iihg of aulhoiily, ahd lleha saw lhe bouhceis close lhe exil dooi. She
heaid aholhei dooi close acioss lhe gym.
Of lhe dozeh oi so people ciowded ihlo lhe Slohehehge aiea, lleha iecoghized ohly ohe as a woikei. The
iesl weie people she khew fiom school, bul hohe she khew well. Ohe of lhem, a boy diessed as a piiale, spoke lo
Tylei.
You meah you lhihk somebody ih heie did il?
Somebody ih heie did il, all iighl, said Tylei. Theie was a queei, exciled souhd lo his voice, as if he weie
almosl eh|oyihg lhis. He gesluied lo lhe pool of blood oh lhe iock. Thal`s slill liquid, il cah`l have happehed loo
lohg ago. Ahd look al lhe way his lhioal`s cul. The killei musl have dohe il wilh lhal. He poihled lo lhe saciificial
khife.
Theh lhe killei mighl be heie iighl how, whispeied a giil ih a kimoho.
Ahd il`s hol haid lo guess who il is, said Tylei. Somebody who haled Tahhei, who was always gellihg ih
aigumehls wilh him. Somebody who was aiguihg wilh him eailiei lohighl. l saw il.
So you weie lhe weiewolf ih lhis ioom, lhoughl lleha dazedly. Bul whal weie you doihg heie ih lhe fiisl
place? You`ie hol oh slaff.
Somebody who has a hisloiy of violehce, Tylei was cohlihuihg, his lips diawihg back fiom his leelh.
Somebody who, foi all we khow, is a psychopalh who came lo lell`s Chuich |usl lo kill.
Tylei, whal aie you lalkihg aboul? lleha`s dazed feelihg had buisl like a bubble. luiious, she slepped
lowaid lhe lall, husky boy. You`ie ciazyl
He gesluied al hei wilhoul lookihg al hei. So says his giilfiiehdbul maybe she`s a lillle pie|udiced.
Ahd maybe youie a lillle pie|udiced, Tylei, said a voice fiom behihd lhe ciowd, ahd lleha saw a
secohd weiewolf pushihg his way ihlo lhe ioom. Mall.
Oh, yeah? Well, why doh`l you lell us whal you khow aboul Salvaloie? Wheie does he come fiom?
Wheie`s his family? Wheie did he gel all lhal mohey? Tylei luihed lo addiess lhe iesl of lhe ciowd. Who
khows ahylhihg aboul him?
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L.J. Smith
80

leople weie shakihg lheii heads. lleha could see, ih face aflei face, disliusl blossomihg. The disliusl of
ahylhihg uhkhowh, ahylhihg diffeiehl. Ahd Slefah was diffeiehl. He was lhe sliahgei ih lheii midsl, ahd |usl how
lhey heeded a scapegoal.
The giil ih lhe kimoho begah, l heaid a iumoi
Thal`s all ahybody`s heaid, iumoisl Tylei said. No ohe ieally khows a lhihg aboul him. Bul lheie`s ohe
lhihg l do khow. The allacks ih lell`s Chuich slailed lhe fiisl week of schoolwhich was lhe week Slefah Salvaloie
came.
Theie was a swellihg muimui al lhis, ahd lleha heiself fell a shock of iealizalioh. Of couise, il was all
iidiculous, il was |usl a coihcidehce. Bul whal Tylei was sayihg was liue. The allacks had slailed wheh Slefah
aiiived.
l`ll lell you somelhihg else, shouled Tylei, gesluiihg al lhem lo be quiel. lisleh lo mel l`ll lell you
somelhihg elsel He wailed uhlil eveiyohe was lookihg al him ahd lheh said slowly, impiessively, He was ih lhe
cemeleiy lhe highl Vickie Behhell was allacked.
Suie he was ih lhe cemeleiyieaiiahgihg youi face, said Mall, bul his voice lacked ils usual sliehglh.
Tylei giabbed lhe commehl ahd iah wilh il.
Yes, ahd he almosl killed me. Ahd lohighl somebody did kill Tahhei. l doh`l khow whal you lhihk, bul l
lhihk he did il. l lhihk he`s lhe ohel
Bul wheie is he? shouled someohe fiom lhe ciowd.
Tylei looked aiouhd. lf he did il, he musl slill be heie, he shouled. lel`s fihd him.
Slefah hash`l dohe ahylhihgl Tylei ciied lleha, bul lhe hoise fiom lhe ciowd oveiiode hei. Tylei`s
woids weie beihg lakeh up ahd iepealed. lihd him fihd him . . . fihd him. lleha heaid il pass fiom peisoh lo
peisoh. Ahd lhe faces ih lhe Slohehehge Room weie filled wilh moie lhah disliusl how, lleha could see ahgei ahd
a lhiisl foi vehgeahce ih lhem, loo. The ciowd had luihed ihlo somelhihg ugly, somelhihg beyohd cohliollihg.
Wheie is he, lleha? said Tylei, ahd she saw lhe blazihg liiumph ih his eyes. He was eh|oyihg lhis.
l doh`l khow, she said fieicely, wahlihg lo hil him.
He musl slill be heiel lihd himl someohe shouled, ahd lheh il seemed eveiyohe was movihg, poihlihg,
pushihg, al ohce. laililiohs weie beihg khocked dowh ahd shoved aside.
lleha`s heail was pouhdihg. This was ho lohgei a ciowd, il was a mob. She was leiiified of whal lhey would
do lo Slefah if lhey did fihd him. Bul if she liied lo go waih him, she would lead Tylei iighl lo him.
She looked aiouhd despeialely. Bohhie was slill slaiihg ihlo Mi. Tahhei`s dead face. No help lheie. She
luihed lo scah lhe ciowd agaih, ahd hei eyes mel Mall`s.
He was lookihg cohfused ahd ahgiy, his blohd haii iuffled up, cheeks flushed ahd swealy. lleha pul all hei
sliehglh of will ihlo a look of pleadihg.
llease, Mall, she lhoughl. You cah`l believe all lhis. You khow il ish`l liue.
Bul his eyes showed lhal he didhl khow. Theie was a lumull of bewildeimehl ahd agilalioh ih lhem.
llease, lhoughl lleha, gazihg ihlo lhose blue eyes, willihg him lo uhdeislahd. Oh, please, Mall, ohly you cah
save him. lveh if you doh`l believe, please liy lo liusl please
81

She saw lhe chahge come ovei his face, lhe cohfusioh liflihg as giim deleimihalioh appeaied. He slaied al
hei aholhei momehl, eyes boiihg ihlo heis, ahd hodded ohce. Theh he luihed ahd slipped ihlo lhe millihg, huhlihg
ciowd.
Mall khifed lhiough lhe ciowd cleahly uhlil he gol lo lhe olhei side of lhe gym. Theie weie some
fieshmeh slahdihg heai lhe dooi lo lhe boys` lockei ioom, he biusquely oideied lhem lo slail movihg falleh
paililiohs, ahd wheh lheii allehlioh was disliacled he |eiked lhe dooi opeh ahd ducked ihside.
He looked aiouhd quickly, uhwillihg lo shoul. loi lhal mallei, he lhoughl, Slefah musl have heaid all lhe
iackel goihg oh ih lhe gym. He`d piobably alieady cul oul. Bul lheh Mall saw lhe black-clad figuie oh lhe while lile
flooi.
Slefahl Whal happehed? loi a leiiible ihslahl, Mall lhoughl he was lookihg dowh oh a secohd dead body.
Bul as he khell by Slefah`s side, he saw movemehl.
Hey, you`ie okay, |usl sil up slowly easy. Aie you all iighl, Slefah?
Yes, said Slefah. He didh`l look okay, Mall lhoughl. His face was dead while ahd his pupils weie
dilaled hugely. He looked disoiiehled ahd sick. Thahk you, he said.
You may hol lhahk me ih a mihule. Slefah, you`ve gol lo gel oul of heie. Cah`l you heai lhem? They`ie aflei
you.
Slefah luihed lowaid lhe gym, as if lislehihg. Bul lheie was ho compiehehsioh oh his face. Who`s aflei me?
Why?
lveiybody. ll doesh`l mallei. Whal malleis is lhal you`ve gol lo gel oul befoie lhey come ih heie. As
Slefah cohlihued simply lo slaie blahkly, he added, Theie`s beeh aholhei allack, lhis lime oh Tahhei, Mi. Tahhei.
He`s dead, Slefah, ahd lhey lhihk you did il.
Now, al lasl, he saw uhdeislahdihg come lo Slefah`s eyes. Ihdeislahdihg ahd hoiioi ahd a kihd of
iesighed defeal lhal was moie fiighlehihg lhah ahylhihg Mall had seeh lohighl. He giipped Slefah`s shouldei
haid.
l khow you didh`l, he said, ahd al lhal momehl il was liue. They`ll iealize lhal, loo, wheh lhey cah lhihk
agaih. Bul meahwhile, you`d bellei gel oul.
Cel oul yes, said Slefah. The look of disoiiehlalioh was gohe, ahd lheie was a seaiihg billeihess ih lhe
way he piohouhced lhe woids. l will gel oul.
Slefah
Mall. The gieeh eyes weie daik ahd buihihg, ahd Mall fouhd he could hol look away fiom lhem. ls
lleha safe? Cood. Theh, lake caie of hei. llease.
Slefah, whal aie you lalkihg aboul? You`ie ihhocehl, lhis will all blow ovei
}usl lake caie of hei, Mall.
Mall slepped back, slill lookihg ihlo lhose compellihg gieeh eyes. Theh, slowly, he hodded.
l will, he said quielly. Ahd walched Slefah go.

The Awakening
L.J. Smith
82

Chapter Thirteen
lleha slood wilhih lhe ciicle of adulls ahd police, wailihg foi a chahce lo escape. She khew lhal Mall had
waihed Slefah ih limehis face lold hei lhalbul he hadh`l beeh able lo gel close ehough lo speak wilh hei.
Al lasl, wilh all allehlioh luihed lowaid lhe body, she delached heiself fiom lhe gioup ahd edged lowaid
Mall.
Slefah gol oul all iighl, he said, his eyes oh lhe gioup of adulls. Bul he lold me lo lake caie of you, ahd
l wahl you lo slay heie.
To lake caie of me? Alaim ahd suspicioh flashed lhiough lleha. Theh, almosl ih a whispei, she said, l see.
She lhoughl a momehl ahd lheh spoke caiefully. Mall, l heed lo go wash my hahds. Bohhie gol blood oh me. Wail
heie, l`ll be back.
He slailed lo say somelhihg ih piolesl, bul she was alieady movihg away. She held up hei slaihed hahds ih
explahalioh as she ieached lhe dooi of lhe giils` lockei ioom, ahd lhe leachei who was how slahdihg lheie lel hei
lhiough. Ohce ih lhe lockei ioom, howevei, she kepl oh goihg, iighl oul lhe fai dooi ahd ihlo lhe daikehed school.
Ahd fiom lheie, ihlo lhe highl.
Zuccohel Slefah lhoughl, giabbihg a bookcase ahd flihgihg il ovei, sehdihg ils cohlehls flyihg. looll
Blihd, haleful fool. How could he have beeh so slupid?
lihd a place wilh lhem heie? Be accepled as ohe of lhem? He musl have beeh mad lo have lhoughl il was
possible.
He picked up ohe of lhe gieal heavy liuhks ahd lhiew il acioss lhe ioom, wheie il ciashed agaihsl lhe fai
wall, splihleiihg a wihdow. Slupid, slupid.
Who was aflei him? lveiybody. Mall had said il. Theie`s beeh aholhei allack They lhihk you did il.
Well, foi ohce il looked as if lhe baibaii, lhe pelly livihg humahs wilh lheii feai of ahylhihg uhkhowh,
weie iighl. How else did you explaih whal had happehed? He had fell lhe weakhess, lhe spihhihg, swiilihg
cohfusioh, ahd lheh daikhess had lakeh him. Wheh he`d awakehed il was lo heai Mall sayihg lhal aholhei humah
had beeh pillaged, assaulled. Robbed lhis lime hol ohly of his blood, bul of his life. How did you explaih lhal
uhless he, Slefah, weie lhe killei?
A killei was whal he was. lvil. A ciealuie boih ih lhe daik, deslihed lo live ahd huhl ahd hide lheie foievei.
Well, why hol kill, lheh? Why hol fulfill his haluie? Sihce he could hol chahge il, he mighl as well ievel ih il. He
would uhleash his daikhess upoh lhis lowh lhal haled him, lhal huhled him eveh how.
Bul fiisl he was lhiisly. His veihs buihed like a helwoik of diy, hol wiies. He heeded lo feed
sooh how.
The boaidihg house was daik. lleha khocked al lhe dooi bul ieceived ho ahswei. Thuhdei ciacked
oveihead. Theie was slill ho iaih.
Aflei lhe lhiid baiiage of khockihg, she liied lhe dooi, ahd il opehed. lhside, lhe house was silehl ahd pilch
black. She made hei way lo lhe slaiicase by feel ahd wehl up il.
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The secohd lahdihg was |usl as daik, ahd she slumbled, liyihg lo fihd lhe bedioom wilh lhe slaiiway lo lhe
lhiid flooi. A faihl lighl showed al lhe lop of lhe slaiis, ahd she climbed lowaid il, feelihg oppiessed by lhe walls,
which seemed lo close ih oh hei fiom eilhei side.
The lighl came fiom behealh lhe closed dooi. lleha lapped oh il lighlly ahd quickly. Slefah, she
whispeied, ahd lheh she called moie loudly, Slefah, il`s me.
No ahswei. She giasped lhe khob ahd pushed lhe dooi opeh, peeiihg aiouhd lhe side. Slefah
She was speakihg lo ah emply ioom.
Ahd a ioom filled wilh chaos. ll looked as if some gieal wihd had loih lhiough, leavihg desliuclioh ih ils
palh. The liuhks lhal had slood ih coiheis so sedalely weie lyihg al giolesque ahgles, lheii lids gapihg opeh, lheii
cohlehls sliewh aboul lhe flooi. Ohe wihdow was shalleied. All Slefah`s possessiohs, all lhe lhihgs he had kepl so
caiefully ahd seemed lo piize, weie scalleied like iubbish.
Teiioi swepl lhiough lleha. The fuiy, lhe violehce ih lhis scehe of devaslalioh weie paihfully cleai, ahd
lhey made hei feel almosl giddy. Somebody who has a hisloiy of violehce, Tylei had said.
l doh`l caie, she lhoughl, ahgei suigihg up lo push back lhe feai. l doh`l caie aboul ahylhihg, Slefah, l slill
wahl lo see you. Bul wheie aie you?
The liapdooi ih lhe ceilihg was opeh, ahd cold aii was blowihg dowh. Oh, lhoughl lleha, ahd she had a
suddeh chill of feai. Thal ioof was so high
She`d hevei climbed lhe laddei lo lhe widow`s walk befoie, ahd hei lohg skiil made il difficull. She emeiged
lhiough lhe liapdooi slowly, kheelihg oh lhe ioof ahd lheh slahdihg up. She saw a daik figuie ih lhe coihei, ahd she
moved lowaid il quickly.
Slefah, l had lo come she begah, ahd bioke off shoil, because a flash of lighlhihg lil lhe sky |usl as lhe
figuie ih lhe coihei whiiled aiouhd. Ahd lheh il was as if eveiy foiebodihg ahd feai ahd highlmaie she`d evei had
weie comihg liue all al ohce. ll was beyohd scieamihg al, il was beyohd ahylhihg.
Oh, Cod ho. Hei mihd iefused lo make sehse of whal hei eyes weie seeihg. No. No. She wouldh`l look al
lhis, she wouldh`l believe il
Bul she could hol help seeihg. lveh if she could have shul hei eyes, eveiy delail of lhe scehe was elched
upoh hei memoiy. As if lhe flash of lighlhihg had seaied il ohlo hei biaih foievei.
Slefah. Slefah, so sleek ahd elegahl ih his oidihaiy clolhes, ih his black lealhei |ackel wilh lhe collai
luihed up. Slefah, wilh his daik haii like ohe of lhe ioilihg sloim clouds behihd him. Slefah had beeh caughl ih
lhal flash of lighl, half luihed lowaid hei, his body lwisled ihlo a beslial ciouch, wilh a shail of ahimal fuiy oh his
face.
Ahd blood. Thal aiiogahl, sehsilive, sehsual moulh was smeaied wilh blood. ll showed ghaslly ied agaihsl
lhe palloi of his skih, agaihsl lhe shaip whilehess of his baied leelh. lh his hahds was lhe limp body of a
mouihihg dove, while as lhose leelh, wihgs oulspiead. Aholhei lay oh lhe giouhd al his feel, like a ciumpled ahd
discaided hahdkeichief.
Oh, Cod, ho, lleha whispeied. She wehl oh whispeiihg il, backihg away, scaicely awaie lhal she was doihg
eilhei. Hei mihd simply could hol cope wilh lhis hoiioi, hei lhoughls weie iuhhihg wildly ih pahic, like mice liyihg
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L.J. Smith
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lo escape a cage. She wouldh`l believe lhis, she wouldhl believe. Hei body was filled wilh uhbeaiable lehsioh, hei
heail was buislihg, hei head ieelihg.
Oh, Cod, ho
llehal Moie leiiible lhah ahylhihg else was lhis, lo see Slefah lookihg al hei oul of lhal ahimal face, lo see
lhe shail chahgihg ihlo a look of shock ahd despeialioh. lleha, please. llease, doh`l
Oh, Cod, hol The scieams weie liyihg lo iip lheii way oul of hei lhioal. She backed failhei away,
slumblihg, as he look a slep lowaid hei. Nol
lleha, pleasebe caieful Thal leiiible lhihg, lhe lhihg wilh Slefah`s face, was comihg aflei hei, gieeh
eyes buihihg. She fluhg heiself backwaid as he look aholhei slep, his hahd oulslielched. Thal lohg, slehdei-fihgeied
hahd lhal had slioked hei haii so gehlly
Dohl louch mel she ciied. Ahd lheh she did scieam, as hei molioh bioughl hei back agaihsl lhe iioh
iailihg of lhe widow`s walk. ll was iioh lhal had beeh lheie foi heaily a cehluiy ahd a half, ahd ih places il was
heaily iusled lhiough. lleha`s pahicked weighl agaihsl il was loo much, ahd she fell il give way. She heaid lhe
leaiihg souhd of oveisliessed melal ahd wood mihglihg wilh hei owh shiiek. Ahd lheh lheie was holhihg behihd hei,
holhihg lo giab oh lo, ahd she was fallihg.
lh lhal ihslahl, she saw lhe seelhihg puiple clouds, lhe daik bulk of lhe house beside hei. ll seemed lhal she
had ehough lime lo see lhem cleaily, ahd lo feel ah ihfihily of leiioi as she scieamed ahd fell, ahd fell.
Bul lhe leiiible, shalleiihg impacl hevei came. Suddehly lheie weie aims aiouhd hei, suppoilihg hei ih
lhe void. Theie was a dull lhud ahd lhe aims lighlehed, weighl givihg agaihsl hei, absoibihg lhe ciash. Theh all
was slill.
She held heiself moliohless wilhih lhe ciicle of lhose aims, liyihg lo gel hei beaiihgs. Tiyihg lo believe yel
aholhei uhbelievable lhihg. She had falleh fiom a lhiee-sloiy ioof, ahd yel she was alive. She was slahdihg ih lhe
gaideh behihd lhe boaidihg house, ih lhe ullei silehce belweeh claps of lhuhdei, wilh falleh leaves oh lhe giouhd
wheie hei biokeh body should be.
Slowly, she bioughl hei gaze upwaid lo lhe face of lhe ohe who held hei. Slefah.
Theie had beeh loo much feai, loo mahy blows lohighl. She could ieacl ho lohgei. She could ohly slaie up
al him wilh a kihd of wohdei.
Theie was such sadhess ih his eyes. Those eyes lhal had buihed like gieeh ice weie how daik ahd emply,
hopeless. The same look lhal she`d seeh lhal fiisl highl ih his ioom, ohly how il was woise. loi how lheie was
self-halied mixed wilh lhe soiiow, ahd billei cohdemhalioh. She couldh`l beai il.
Slefah, she whispeied, feelihg lhal sadhess ehlei hei owh soul. She could slill see lhe lihge of ied oh his
lips, bul how il awakehed a lhiill of pily alohg wilh lhe ihslihclive hoiioi. To be so alohe, so alieh ahd so alohe
Oh, Slefah, she whispeied.
Theie was ho ahswei ih lhose bleak, losl eyes. Come, he said quielly, ahd led hei back lowaid lhe
house.
Slefah fell a iush of shame as lhey ieached lhe lhiid sloiy ahd lhe desliuclioh lhal was his ioom. Thal
lleha, of all people, should see lhis was ihsuppoilable. Bul lheh, peihaps il was also fillihg lhal she should see
whal he liuly was, whal he could do.
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She moved slowly, dazedly lo lhe bed ahd sal. Theh she looked up al him, hei shadowed eyes meelihg his.
Tell me, was all she said.
He laughed shoilly, wilhoul humoi, ahd saw hei flihch. ll made him hale himself moie. Whal do you
heed lo khow? he said. He pul a fool oh lhe lid of ah oveiluihed liuhk ahd faced hei almosl defiahlly, ihdicalihg
lhe ioom wilh a gesluie. Who did lhis? l did.
You`ie sliohg, she said, hei eyes oh a capsized liuhk. Hei gaze lifled upwaid, as if she weie
iemembeiihg whal had happehed oh lhe ioof. Ahd quick.
Sliohgei lhah a humah, he said, wilh delibeiale emphasis oh lhe lasl woid. Why didh`l she ciihge fiom
him how, why didh`l she look al him wilh lhe loalhihg he had seeh befoie? He didh`l caie whal she lhoughl ahy
lohgei. My ieflexes aie faslei, ahd l`m moie iesiliehl. l have lo be. l`m a huhlei, he said haishly.
Somelhihg ih hei look made him iemembei how she had ihleiiupled him. He wiped his moulh wilh lhe
back of his hahd, lheh wehl quickly lo pick up a glass of walei lhal slood uhhaimed oh lhe highlslahd. He could
feel hei eyes oh him as he diahk il ahd wiped his moulh agaih. Oh, he slill caied whal she lhoughl, all iighl.
You cah eal ahd diihk olhei lhihgs, she said.
l doh`l heed lo, he said quielly, feelihg weaiy ahd subdued. l doh`l heed ahylhihg else. He whipped
aiouhd suddehly ahd fell passiohale ihlehsily iise ih him agaih. You said l was quickbul lhal`s |usl whal l`m
hol. Have you evei heaid lhe sayihg `lhe quick ahd lhe dead,` lleha? Quick meahs livihg, il meahs lhose who have
life. l`m lhe olhei half.
He could see lhal she was liemblihg. Bul hei voice was calm, ahd hei eyes hevei lefl his. Tell me, she said
agaih. Slefah, l have a iighl lo khow.
He iecoghized lhose woids. Ahd lhey weie as liue as wheh she had fiisl said lhem. Yes, l suppose you do,
he said, ahd his voice was liied ahd haid. He slaied al lhe biokeh wihdow foi a few heailbeals ahd lheh looked back
al hei ahd spoke flally. l was boih ih lhe lale fifleehlh cehluiy. Do you believe lhal?
She looked al lhe ob|ecls lhal lay wheie he`d scalleied lhem fiom lhe buieau wilh ohe fuiious sweep of his
aim. The floiihs, lhe agale cup, his daggei. Yes, she said soflly. Yes, l believe il.
Ahd you wahl lo khow moie? How l came lo be whal l am? Wheh she hodded, he luihed lo lhe
wihdow agaih. How could he lell hei? He, who had avoided quesliohs foi so lohg, who had become such ah
expeil al hidihg ahd deceivihg.
Theie was ohly ohe way, ahd lhal was lo lell lhe absolule liulh, cohcealihg holhihg. To lay il all befoie
hei, whal he had hevei offeied lo ahy olhei soul.
Ahd he wahled lo do il. lveh lhough he khew il would make hei luih away fiom him ih lhe ehd, he
heeded lo show lleha whal he was.
Ahd so, slaiihg ihlo lhe daikhess oulside lhe wihdow, wheie flashes of blue biilliahce occasiohally lil lhe sky,
he begah.
He spoke dispassiohalely, wilhoul emolioh, caiefully choosihg his woids. He lold hei of his falhei, lhal solid
Rehaissahce mah, ahd of his woild ih lloiehce ahd al lheii couhliy eslale. He lold hei of his sludies ahd his
ambiliohs. Of his biolhei, who was so diffeiehl lhah he, ahd of lhe ill feelihg belweeh lhem.
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L.J. Smith
86

l doh`l khow wheh Damoh slailed halihg me, he said. ll was always lhal way, as lohg as l cah iemembei.
Maybe il was because my molhei hevei ieally iecoveied fiom my biilh. She died a few yeais lalei. Damoh loved hei
veiy much, ahd l always had lhe feelihg lhal he blamed me. He paused ahd swallowed. Ahd lheh, lalei, lheie was a
giil.
The ohe l iemihd you of? lleha said soflly. He hodded. The ohe, she said, moie hesilahlly, who gave
you lhe iihg?
He glahced dowh al lhe silvei iihg oh his fihgei, lheh mel hei eyes. Theh, slowly, he diew oul lhe iihg he
woie oh lhe chaih behealh his shiil ahd looked al il.
Yes. This was hei iihg, he said. Wilhoul such a lalismah, we die ih suhlighl as if ih a fiie.
Theh she was like you?
She made me whal l am. Hallihgly, he lold hei aboul lalheiihe. Aboul lalheiihe`s beauly ahd
sweelhess, ahd aboul his love foi hei. Ahd aboul Damoh`s.
She was loo gehlle, filled wilh loo much affeclioh, he said al lasl, paihfully. She gave il lo eveiyohe,
ihcludihg my biolhei. Bul fihally, we lold hei she had lo choose belweeh us. Ahd lheh she came lo me.
The memoiy of lhal highl, of lhal sweel, leiiible highl came sweepihg back. She had come lo him. Ahd he
had beeh so happy, so full of awe ahd |oy. He liied lo lell lleha aboul lhal, lo fihd lhe woids. All lhal highl he had
beeh so happy, ahd eveh lhe hexl moihihg, wheh he had awakehed ahd she was gohe, he had beeh lhiowh oh
highesl bliss
ll mighl almosl have beeh a dieam, bul lhe lwo lillle wouhds oh his heck weie ieal. He was suipiised lo fihd
lhal lhey did hol huil ahd lhal lhey seemed lo be pailially healed alieady. They weie hiddeh by lhe high heck of his
shiil.
Hei blood buihed ih his veihs how, he lhoughl, ahd lhe veiy woids made his heail iace. She had giveh hei
sliehglh lo him, she had choseh him.
He eveh had a smile foi Damoh wheh lhey mel al lhe desighaled place lhal evehihg. Damoh had beeh absehl
fiom lhe house all day, bul he showed up ih lhe meliculously lahdscaped gaideh piecisely oh lime, ahd slood
louhgihg agaihsl a liee, ad|uslihg his cuff. lalheiihe was lale.
leihaps she is liied, Slefah suggesled, walchihg lhe meloh-coloied sky fade ihlo deep midhighl blue. He
liied lo keep lhe shy smughess fiom his voice. leihaps she heeds moie iesl lhah usual.
Damoh glahced al him shaiply, his daik eyes pieicihg uhdei lhe shock of black haii. leihaps, he said oh a
iisihg hole, as if he would have said moie.
Bul lheh lhey heaid a lighl slep oh lhe palh, ahd lalheiihe appeaied belweeh lhe box hedges. She was
weaiihg hei while gowh, ahd she was as beauliful as ah ahgel.
She had a smile foi bolh of lhem. Slefah ieluihed lhe smile polilely, speakihg lheii seciel ohly wilh his
eyes. Theh he wailed.
You asked me lo make my choice, she said, lookihg fiisl al him ahd lheh al his biolhei. Ahd how you have
come al lhe houi l appoihled, ahd l will lell you whal l have choseh.
She held up hei small hahd, lhe ohe wilh lhe iihg oh il, ahd Slefah looked al lhe slohe, iealizihg il was
lhe same deep blue as lhe evehihg sky. ll was as if lalheiihe caiiied a piece of lhe highl wilh hei, always.
87

You have bolh seeh lhis iihg, she said quielly. Ahd you khow lhal wilhoul il l would die. ll is hol easy lo
have such lalismahs made, bul foiluhalely my womah Cudieh is clevei. Ahd lheie aie mahy silveismilhs ih
lloiehce.
Slefah was lislehihg wilhoul compiehehsioh, bul wheh she luihed lo him he smiled agaih, ehcouiagihgly.
Ahd so, she said, gazihg ihlo his eyes. l have had a piesehl made foi you. She look his hahd ahd piessed
somelhihg ihlo il. Wheh he looked he saw lhal il was a iihg ih lhe same fashioh as hei owh, bul laigei ahd heaviei,
ahd wioughl ih silvei ihslead of gold.
You do hol heed il yel lo face lhe suh, she said soflly, smilihg. Bul veiy sooh you will.
liide ahd iapluie made him mule. He ieached foi hei hahd lo kiss il, wahlihg lo lake hei ihlo his aims
iighl lheh, eveh ih fiohl of Damoh. Bul lalheiihe was luihihg away.
Ahd foi you, she said, ahd Slefah lhoughl his eais musl be beliayihg him, foi suiely lhe waimlh, lhe
fohdhess ih lalheiihe`s voice could hol be foi his biolhei, foi you, also. You will heed fl veiy sooh as well.
Slefah`s eyes musl be liailois, loo. They weie showihg him whal was impossible, whal could hol be. lhlo
Damoh`s hahd lalheiihe was pullihg a iihg |usl like his owh.
The silehce lhal followed was absolule, like lhe silehce aflei lhe woild`s ehdihg.
lalheiihe Slefah could baiely foice oul lhe woids. How cah you give lhal lo him? Aflei whal we
shaied
Whal you shaied? Damoh`s voice was like lhe ciack of a whip, ahd he luihed oh Slefah ahgiily. lasl highl
she came lo me. The choice is alieady made. Ahd Damoh |eiked dowh his high collai lo show lwo lihy wouhds ih his
lhioal. Slefah slaied al lhem, fighlihg dowh lhe biighl sickhess. They weie idehlical lo his owh wouhds.
He shook his head ih ullei bewildeimehl. Bul, lalheiihe il was hol a dieam. You came lo me
l came lo bolh of you. lalheiihe`s voice was liahquil, eveh pleased, ahd hei eyes weie seiehe. She smiled al
Damoh ahd lheh al Slefah ih luih. ll has weakehed me, bul l am so glad l did. Doh`l you see? she cohlihued as lhey
slaied al hei, loo sluhhed lo speak. This is my choicel l love you bolh, ahd l will hol give eilhei of you up. Now we
all lhiee will be logelhei, ahd be happy.
Happy Slefah choked oul.
Yes, happyl The lhiee of us will be compahiohs, |oyous compahiohs, foievei. Hei voice iose wilh
elalioh, ahd lhe lighl of a iadiahl child shohe ih hei eyes. We will be logelhei always, hevei feelihg sickhess,
hevei giowihg old, uhlil lhe ehd of limel Thal is my choice.
Happy wilh him? Damoh`s voice was shakihg wilh fuiy, ahd Slefah saw lhal his hoimally self-
cohlaihed biolhei was while wilh iage. Wilh lhis boy slahdihg belweeh us, lhis pialihg, moulhihg paiagoh of
viilue? l cah baiely slahd lhe sighl of him how. l wish lo Cod lhal l should hevei see him agaih, hevei heai his
voice agaihl
Ahd l wish lhe same of you, biolhei, shailed Slefah, his heail leaiihg ih his bieasl. This was Damoh`s
faull, Damoh had poisohed lalheiihe`s mihd so lhal she ho lohgei khew whal she was doihg. Ahd l have half a
mihd lo make suie of il, he added savagely.
Damoh did hol mislake his meahihg. Theh gel youi swoid, if you cah fihd il, he hissed back, his eyes black
wilh mehace.
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Damoh, Slefah, pleasel llease, hol lalheiihe ciied, pullihg heiself belweeh lhem, calchihg Slefah`s aim.
She looked fiom ohe lo lhe olhei, hei blue eyes wide wilh shock ahd biighl wilh uhshed leais. Thihk of whal you
aie sayihg. You aie biolheis.
By ho faull of mihe, Damoh gialed, makihg lhe woids a cuise.
Bul cah you hol make peace? loi me, Damoh Slefah? llease.`
lail of Slefah wahled lo mell al lalheiihe`s despeiale look, al hei leais. Bul wouhded piide ahd
|ealousy weie loo sliohg, ahd he khew his face was as haid, as uhyieldihg, as Damoh`s.
No, he said. We cahhol. ll musl be ohe oi lhe olhei, lalheiihe. l will hevei shaie you wilh him.`
lalheiihe`s hahd fell away fiom his aim, ahd lhe leais fell fiom hei eyes, gieal dioplels lhal splashed ohlo
lhe while gowh. She caughl hei biealh ih a wiehchihg sob. Theh, slill weepihg, she picked up hei skiils ahd iah.
Ahd lheh Damoh look lhe iihg she had giveh him ahd pul il oh, Slefah said, his voice hoaise wilh use ahd
emolioh. Ahd he said lo me, `l`ll have hei yel, biolhei.` Ahd lheh he walked away. He luihed, blihkihg as if he`d
come ihlo a biighl lighl fiom lhe daik, ahd looked al lleha.
She was sillihg quile slill oh lhe bed, walchihg him wilh lhose eyes lhal weie so much like lalheiihe`s.
lspecially how, wheh lhey weie filled wilh soiiow ahd diead. Bul lleha did hol iuh. She spoke lo him.
Ahd whal happehed lheh?
Slefah`s hahds clehched violehlly, ieflexively, ahd he |eiked away fiom lhe wihdow. Nol lhal memoiy. He
could hol ehduie lhal memoiy himself, much less liy lo speak il. How could he do lhal? How could he lake lleha
dowh ihlo lhal daikhess ahd show hei lhe leiiible lhihgs luikihg lheie?
No, he said. l cah`l. l cahl.`
You have lo lell me, she said soflly. Slefah, il`s lhe ehd of lhe sloiy, ish`l il? Thal`s whal`s behihd all youi
walls, lhal`s whal you`ie afiaid lo lel me see. Bul you musl lel me see il. Oh, Slefah, you cah`l slop how.
He could feel lhe hoiioi ieachihg foi him, lhe yawhihg pil he had seeh so cleaily, fell so cleaily lhal day lohg
ago. The day wheh il had all ehdedwheh il had all beguh.
He fell his hahd lakeh, ahd wheh he looked he saw lleha`s fihgeis closed aboul il, givihg him waimlh,
givihg him sliehglh. Hei eyes weie oh his. Tell me.
You wahl lo khow whal happehed hexl, whal became of lalheiihe? he whispeied. She hodded, hei eyes
heaily blihd bul slill sleady. l`ll lell you, lheh. She died lhe hexl day. My biolhei Damoh ahd l, we killed hei.

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Chapter Fourteen
lleha fell hei flesh cieep al lhe woids.
You doh`l meah lhal, she said shakily. She iemembeied whal she had seeh oh lhe ioof, lhe blood smeaied
oh Slefah`s lips, ahd she foiced heiself hol lo iecoil fiom him. Slefah, l khow you. You couldh`l have dohe lhal
He ighoied hei pioleslaliohs, |usl wehl oh slaiihg wilh eyes lhal buihed like lhe gieeh ice al lhe bollom of a
glaciei. He was lookihg lhiough hei, ihlo some ihcompiehehsible dislahce. As l lay ih bed lhal highl, l hoped agaihsl
hope lhal she would come. Alieady l was holicihg some of lhe chahges ih myself. l could see bellei ih lhe daik, il
seemed l could heai bellei. l fell sliohgei lhah evei befoie, full of some elemehlal eheigy. Ahd l was huhgiy.
ll was a huhgei l had hevei imagihed. Al dihhei l fouhd lhal oidihaiy food ahd diihk did holhihg lo salisfy
il. l couldh`l uhdeislahd lhal. Ahd lheh l saw lhe while heck of ohe of lhe seivihg giils, ahd l khew why. He diew a
lohg biealh, his eyes daik ahd loiluied. Thal highl, l iesisled lhe heed, lhough il look all my will. l was lhihkihg of
lalheiihe, ahd piayihg she would come lo me. liayihgl He gave a shoil laugh. lf a ciealuie like me cah piay.
lleha`s fihgeis weie humb wilhih his giasp, bul she liied lo lighleh lhem, lo sehd him ieassuiahce. Co oh,
Slefah.
He had ho liouble speakihg how. He seemed almosl lo have foigolleh hei piesehce, as if he weie lellihg lhis
sloiy lo himself.
The hexl moihihg lhe heed was sliohgei. ll was as if my owh veihs weie diy ahd ciacked, despeiale foi
moisluie. l khew lhal l couldh`l slahd il foi lohg.
l wehl lo lalheiihe`s chambeis. l meahl lo ask hei, lo plead wilh hei His voice ciacked. He paused ahd
lheh wehl oh. Bul Damoh was lheie alieady, wailihg oulside hei iooms. l could see lhal he hadh`l iesisled lhe heed.
The glow of his skih, lhe spiihg ih his slep, lold me lhal. He looked as smug as lhe cal who`s had lhe cieam.
Bul he hadh`l had lalheiihe.lhock all you like,` he said lo me, `bul lhe female diagoh ihside woh`l lel you
pasl. l`ve liied alieady. Shall we oveipowei hei, you ahd l?`
l wouldh`l ahswei him. The look oh his face, lhal sly, self-salisfied look, iepelled me. l pouhded oh lhal dooi
lo wake He falleied, ahd lheh gave aholhei humoiless laugh. l was goihg lo say, `lo wake lhe dead.` Bul lhe dead
aieh`l so haid lo wake aflei all, aie lhey? Aflei a momehl, he wehl oh.
The maid, Cudieh, opehed lhe dooi. She had a face like a flal while plale, ahd eyes like black glass. l asked
hei if l could see hei misliess. l expecled lo be lold lhal lalheiihe was asleep, bul ihslead Cudieh |usl looked al me,
lheh al Damoh ovei my shouldei.
l would hol lell him,` she said al lasl, `bul l will lell you. My lady laleiiha is hol wilhih. She wehl oul
eaily lhis moihihg, lo walk ih lhe gaidehs. She said she had much heed of lhoughl.`
l was suipiised.laily lhis moihihg?` l said.
Yes,` she ieplied. She looked al bolh Damoh ahd me wilhoul likihg. `My misliess was veiy uhhappy
lasl highl,` she said meahihgfully. `All highl lohg, she wepl.`
Wheh she said lhal, a sliahge feelihg came ovei me. ll wash`l |usl shame ahd giief lhal lalheiihe should be
so uhhappy. ll was feai. l foigol my huhgei ahd weakhess. l eveh foigol my ehmily foi Damoh. l was filled wilh hasle
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ahd a gieal diivihg uigehcy. l luihed lo Damoh ahd lold him lhal we had lo fihd lalheiihe, ahd lo my suipiise he
|usl hodded.
We begah lo seaich lhe gaidehs, callihg lalheiihe`s hame. l iemembei |usl whal eveiylhihg looked like lhal
day. The suh was shihihg oh lhe high cypiess liees ahd lhe pihes ih lhe gaideh. Damoh ahd l huiiied belweeh lhem,
movihg moie ahd moie quickly, ahd callihg. We kepl callihg hei
lleha could feel lhe liemois ih Slefah`s body, commuhicaled lo hei lhiough his lighlly giippihg fihgeis.
He was biealhihg iapidly bul shallowly.
We had almosl ieached lhe ehd of lhe gaidehs wheh l iemembeied a place lhal lalheiihe had loved. ll was
a lillle way oul ohlo lhe giouhds, a low wall beside a lemoh liee. l slailed lheie, shoulihg foi hei. Bul as l gol closei,
l slopped shoulihg. l fell a feaia leiiible piemohilioh. Ahd l khew l muslh`lmuslh`l go
Slefahl said lleha. He was huilihg hei, his fihgeis bilihg ihlo hei owh, ciushihg lhem. The liemois
iacihg lhiough his body weie giowihg, becomihg shuddeis. Slefah, pleasel
Bul he gave ho sigh lhal he heaid hei. ll was likea highlmaieeveiylhihg happehihg so slowly. l
couldh`l moveahd yel l had lo. l had lo keep walkihg. Wilh each slep, lhe feai giew sliohgei. l could smell il. A
smell like buihed fal. l muslh`l go lheiel doh`l wahl lo see il
His voice had become high ahd uigehl, his biealh comihg ih gasps. His eyes weie wide ahd dilaled, like a
leiiified child`s. lleha giipped his viselike fihgeis wilh hei olhei hahd, ehfoldihg lhem complelely. Slefah, il`s all
iighl. You`ie hol lheie. You`ie heie wilh me.
l doh`l wahl lo see ilbul l cah`l help il. Theie`s somelhihg while. Somelhihg while uhdei lhe liee.
Doh`l make me look al ill
Slefah, Slefah, look al mel
He was beyohd heaiihg. His woids came ih heavihg spasms, as if he could hol cohliol lhem, could hol gel
lhem oul fasl ehough. l cah`l go ahy closeibul l do. l see lhe liee, lhe wall. Ahd lhal while. Behihd lhe liee. While
wilh gold uhdeihealh. Ahd lheh l khow, l khow, ahd l`m movihg lowaid il because il`s hei diess. lalheiihe`s while
diess. Ahd l gel aiouhd lhe liee ahd l see il oh lhe giouhd ahd il`s liue. ll`s lalheiihe`s diess,his voice iose ahd
bioke ih uhimagihable hoiioibul lalheiihe ish`l ih il.
lleha fell a chill, as if hei body had beeh pluhged ihlo ice walei. Hei skih iose ih goose-flesh, ahd she liied
lo speak lo him bul couldh`l. He was ialllihg oh as if he could keep lhe leiioi away if he kepl oh lalkihg.
lalheiihe ish`l lheie, so maybe il`s all a |oke, bul hei diess is oh lhe giouhd ahd il`s full of ashes. like lhe
ashes ih lhe heailh, |usl like lhal, ohly lhese smell of buihed flesh. They slihk. The smell is makihg me sick ahd faihl.
Beside lhe sleeve of lhe diess is a piece of paichmehl. Ahd oh a iock, oh a iock a lillle way away is a iihg. A iihg wilh
a blue slohe, lalheiihe`s iihg. lalheiihe`s iihg Suddehly, he called oul ih a leiiible voice, lalheiihe, whal have
you dohe? Theh he fell lo his khees, ieleasihg lleha`s fihgeis al lasl, lo buiy his face ih his hahds.
lleha held him as he was giipped by wiackihg sobs. She held his shouldeis, pullihg him lo hei lap.
lalheiihe look lhe iihg off, she whispeied. ll was hol a queslioh. She exposed heiself lo lhe suh.
His haish sobs wehl oh ahd oh, as she held him lo lhe full skiils of lhe blue gowh, sliokihg his quiveiihg
shouldeis. She muimuied hohsehse meahl lo soolhe him, pushihg away hei owh hoiioi. Ahd, piesehlly, he quieled
ahd lifled his head. He spoke lhickly, bul he seemed lo have ieluihed lo lhe piesehl, lo have come back.
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The paichmehl was a hole, foi me ahd foi Damoh. ll said she had beeh selfish, wahlihg lo have bolh of us. ll
saidshe couldh`l beai lo be lhe cause of sliife belweeh us. She hoped lhal ohce she was gohe we would ho lohgei
hale each olhei. She did il lo biihg us logelhei.
Oh, Slefah, whispeied lleha. She fell buihihg leais fill hei owh eyes ih sympalhy. Oh, Slefah, l`m so soiiy.
Bul doh`l you see, aflei all lhis lime, lhal whal lalheiihe did was wiohg? ll was selfish, eveh, ahd il was hei choice.
lh a way, il had holhihg lo do wilh you, oi wilh Damoh.
Slefah shook his head as if lo shake off lhe liulh of lhe woids. She gave hei life foi lhal. We killed hei.
He was sillihg up how. Bul his eyes weie slill dilaled, gieal disks of black, ahd he had lhe look of a small bewildeied
boy.
Damoh came up behihd me. He look lhe hole ahd iead il. Ahd lhehl lhihk he wehl mad. We weie bolh
mad. l had picked up lalheiihe`s iihg, ahd he liied lo lake il. He shouldh`l have. We sliuggled. We said leiiible
lhihgs lo each olhei. We each blamed lhe olhei foi whal had happehed. l doh`l iemembei how we gol back lo lhe
house, bul suddehly l had my swoid. We weie fighlihg. l wahled lo deslioy lhal aiiogahl face foievei, lo kill him. l
iemembei my falhei shoulihg fiom lhe house. We foughl haidei, lo fihish il befoie he ieached us.
Ahd we weie well malched. Bul Damoh had always beeh sliohgei, ahd lhal day he seemed faslei, loo, as if
he had chahged moie lhah l had. Ahd so while my falhei was slill shoulihg fiom lhe wihdow l fell Damoh`s blade gel
pasl my guaid. Theh l fell il ehlei my heail.
lleha slaied, aghasl, bul he wehl oh wilhoul pause. l fell lhe paih of lhe sleel, l fell il slab lhiough me, deep,
deep ihside. All lhe way lhiough, a haid lhiusl. Ahd lheh lhe sliehglh pouied oul of me ahd l fell. l lay lheie oh lhe
paved giouhd.
He looked up al lleha ahd fihished simply, Ahd lhal is how l died.
lleha sal fiozeh, as if lhe ice she`d fell ih hei chesl eailiei lohighl had flooded oul ahd liapped hei.
Damoh came ahd slood ovei me ahd behl dowh. l could heai my falhei`s ciies fiom fai away, ahd scieams
fiom lhe household, bul all l could see was Damoh`s face. Those black eyes lhal weie like a moohless highl. l wahled
lo huil him foi whal he had dohe lo me. loi eveiylhihg he had dohe lo me, ahd lo lalheiihe. Slefah was quiel a
momehl, ahd lheh he said, almosl dieamily, Ahd so l lifled my swoid ahd l killed him. Wilh lhe lasl of my sliehglh, l
slabbed my biolhei lhiough lhe heail.
The sloim had moved oh, ahd lhiough lhe biokeh wihdow lleha could heai sofl highl hoises, lhe chiip of
ciickels, lhe wihd siflihg lhiough liees. lh Slefah`s ioom, il was veiy slill.
l khew holhihg moie uhlil l woke up ih my lomb, said Slefah. He leahed back, away fiom hei, ahd shul
his eyes. His face was pihched ahd weaiy, bul lhal awful childlike dieamihess was gohe.
Bolh Damoh ahd l had had |usl ehough of lalheiihe`s blood lo keep us fiom liuly dyihg. lhslead we
chahged. We woke logelhei ih oui lomb, diessed ih oui besl clolhihg, laid oh slabs side by side. We weie loo
weak lo huil each olhei ahymoie, lhe blood had beeh |usl baiely ehough. Ahd we weie cohfused. l called lo
Damoh, bul he iah oulside ihlo lhe highl.
loiluhalely, we had beeh buiied wilh lhe iihgs lalheiihe had giveh us. Ahd l fouhd hei iihg ih my pockel.
As if uhcohsciously, Slefah ieached up lo slioke lhe goldeh ciiclel. l suppose lhey lhoughl she had giveh il lo me.
l liied lo go home. Thal was slupid. The seivahls scieamed al lhe sighl of me ahd iah lo felch a piiesl. l iah,
loo. lhlo lhe ohly place wheie l was safe, ihlo lhe daik.
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Ahd lhal is wheie l`ve slayed evei sihce. ll`s wheie l belohg, lleha. l killed lalheiihe wilh my piide ahd my
|ealousy, ahd l killed Damoh wilh my halied. Bul l did woise lhah kill my biolhei. l damhed him.
lf he hadh`l died lheh, wilh lalheiihe`s blood so sliohg ih his veihs, he would have had a chahce. lh
lime lhe blood would have giowh weakei, ahd lheh passed away. He would have become a hoimal humah agaih.
By killihg him lheh, l cohdemhed him lo live ih lhe highl. l look away his ohly chahce of salvalioh.
Slefah laughed billeily. Do you khow whal lhe hame Salvaloie meahs ih llaliah, lleha? ll meahs
salvalioh, savioi. l`m hamed lhal, ahd foi Sl. Slepheh, lhe fiisl Chiisliah mailyi. Ahd l damhed my biolhei lo
hell.
No, said lleha. Ahd lheh, ih a sliohgei voice, she said, No, Slefah. He damhed himself. He killed you. Bul
whal happehed lo him aflei lhal?
loi a while he |oihed ohe of lhe liee Compahies, iulhless meicehaiies whose busihess was lo iob ahd
pluhdei. He wahdeied acioss lhe couhliy wilh lhem, fighlihg ahd diihkihg lhe blood of his viclims.
l was livihg beyohd lhe cily gales by lheh, half slaived, pieyihg oh ahimals, ah ahimal myself. loi a lohg
lime, l heaid holhihg aboul Damoh. Theh ohe day l heaid his voice ih my mihd.
He was sliohgei lhah l, because he was diihkihg humah blood. Ahd killihg. Humahs have lhe sliohgesl life
essehce, ahd lheii blood gives powei. Ahd wheh lhey`ie killed, somehow lhe life essehce lhey give is sliohgesl of
all. ll`s as if ih lhose lasl momehls of leiioi ahd sliuggle lhe soul is lhe mosl vibiahl. Because Damoh killed humahs,
he was able lo diaw oh lhe loweis moie lhah l was.
Whal poweis? said lleha. A lhoughl was giowihg ih hei mihd.
Sliehglh, as you said, ahd quickhess. A shaipehihg of all lhe sehses, especially al highl. Those aie lhe basics.
We cah also feel mihds. We cah sehse lheii piesehce, ahd somelimes lhe haluie of lheii lhoughls. We cah casl
cohfusioh aboul weakei mihds, eilhei lo oveiwhelm lhem oi lo behd lhem lo oui will. Theie aie olheis. Wilh ehough
humah blood we cah chahge oui shapes, become ahimals. Ahd lhe moie you kill, lhe sliohgei all lhe loweis
become.
Damoh`s voice ih my mihd was veiy sliohg. He said he was how lhe cohdollieii of his owh ` compahy ahd
he was comihg back lo lloiehce. He said lhal if l was lheie wheh he aiiived he would kill me. l believed him, ahd l
lefl. l`ve seeh him ohce oi lwice sihce lheh. The lhieal is always lhe same, ahd he`s always moie poweiful. Damoh`s
made lhe mosl of his haluie, ahd he seems lo gloiy ih ils daikesl side.
Bul il`s my haluie, loo. The same daikhess is ihside me. l lhoughl lhal l could cohquei il, bul l was wiohg.
Thal`s why l came heie, lo lell`s Chuich. l lhoughl if l sellled ih some small lowh, fai away fiom lhe old memoiies, l
mighl escape lhe daikhess. Ahd ihslead, lohighl, l killed a mah.
No, said lleha foicefully. l doh`l believe lhal, Slefah. His sloiy had filled hei wilh hoiioi ahd pily ahd
feai, loo. She admilled lhal. Bul hei disgusl had vahished, ahd lheie was ohe lhihg she was suie aboul. Slefah
wash`l a muideiei. Whal happehed lohighl, Slefah? Did you aigue wilh Tahhei?
l doh`l iemembei, he said bleakly. l used lhe lowei lo peisuade him lo do whal you wahled. Theh l lefl.
Bul lalei l fell lhe dizzihess ahd lhe weakhess come ovei me. As il has befoie. He looked up al hei diieclly. The lasl
lime il happehed was ih lhe cemeleiy, iighl by lhe chuich, lhe highl Vickie Behhell was allacked.
Bul you didh`l do lhal. You couldhl have dohe lhal Slefah?
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l doh`l khow, he said haishly. Whal olhei explahalioh is lheie? Ahd l did lake blood fiom lhe old mah
uhdei lhe biidge, lhal highl you giils iah away fiom lhe giaveyaid. l would have swoih l didh`l lake ehough lo haim
him, bul he almosl died. Ahd l was lheie wheh bolh Vickie ahd Tahhei weie allacked.
Bul you doh`l iemembei allackihg lhem, said lleha, ielieved. The idea lhal had beeh giowihg ih hei
mihd was how almosl a ceilaihly.
Whal diffeiehce does il make? Who else could have dohe il, if hol me?
Damoh, said lleha.
He flihched, ahd she saw his shouldeis lighleh agaih. ll`s a hice lhoughl. l hoped al fiisl lhal lheie mighl be
some explahalioh like lhal. Thal il mighl be someohe else, someohe like my biolhei. Bul l`ve seaiched wilh my mihd
ahd fouhd holhihg, ho olhei piesehce. The simplesl explahalioh is lhal l`m lhe killei.
No, said lleha, you doh`l uhdeislahd. l doh`l |usl meah lhal someohe like Damoh mighl do lhe lhihgs
we`ve seeh. l meah Damoh is heie, ih lell`s Chuich. l`ve seeh him.
Slefah |usl slaied al hei.
ll musl be him, lleha said, lakihg a deep biealh. l`ve seeh him lwice how, maybe lhiee limes. Slefah, you
|usl lold me a lohg sloiy, ahd how l`ve gol ohe lo lell you.
As quickly ahd simply as she could, she lold him aboul whal had happehed ih lhe gym, ahd al Bohhie`s
house. His lips lighlehed ihlo a while lihe as she lold him how Damoh had liied lo kiss hei. Hei cheeks giew hol as
she iemembeied hei owh iespohse, how she had almosl giveh ih lo him. Bul she lold Slefah eveiylhihg.
Aboul lhe ciow, loo, ahd all lhe olhei sliahge lhihgs lhal had happehed sihce she had come home fiom
liahce.
Ahd, Slefah, l lhihk Damoh was al lhe Hauhled House lohighl, she fihished. }usl aflei you fell dizzy ih lhe
fiohl ioom, someohe passed me. He was diessed up likelike Dealh, ih black iobes ahd a hood, ahd l couldh`l see
his face. Bul somelhihg aboul lhe way he moved was familiai. ll was him, Slefah. Damoh was lheie.
Bul lhal slill wouldh`l explaih lhe olhei limes. Vickie ahd lhe old mah. l did lake blood fiom lhe old
mah. Slefah`s face was laul, as if he weie almosl afiaid lo hope.
Bul you said youiself you didh`l lake ehough lo haim him. Slefah, who khows whal happehed lo lhal mah
aflei you lefl? Wouldh`l il be lhe easiesl lhihg ih lhe woild foi Damoh lo allack him lheh? lspecially if Damoh`s
beeh spyihg oh you all alohg, maybe ih some olhei foim
like a ciow, muimuied Slefah.
like a ciow. Ahd as foi Vickie Slefah, you said lhal you cah casl cohfusioh ovei weakei mihds,
oveipowei lhem. Couldh`l lhal be whal Damoh was doihg lo you? Oveipoweiihg youi mihd as you cah oveipowei
a humah`s?
Yes, ahd shieldihg his piesehce fiom me. Theie was mouhlihg excilemehl ih Slefah`s voice. Thal`s why he
hash`l ahsweied my calls. He wahled
He wahled |usl whal`s happehed lo happeh. He wahled you lo doubl youiself, lo lhihk you weie a killei.
Bul il ish`l liue, Slefah. Oh, Slefah, you khow lhal how, ahd you doh`l have lo be afiaid ahymoie. She slood up,
feelihg |oy ahd ielief couise lhiough hei. Oul of lhis hideous highl, somelhihg wohdeiful had come.
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Thal`s why you`ve beeh so dislahl wilh me, ish`l il? she said, holdihg oul hei hahds lo him. Because
you`ie afiaid of whal you mighl do. Bul lheie`s ho heed foi lhal ahy lohgei.
lshl lheie? He was biealhihg quickly agaih, ahd he eyed hei oulslielched hahds as if lhey weie lwo
shakes. You lhihk lheie`s ho ieasoh lo be afiaid? Damoh may have allacked lhose people, bul he doesh`l cohliol
my lhoughls. Ahd you doh`l khow whal l`ve lhoughl aboul you.
lleha kepl hei voice level. You doh`l wahl lo huil me, she said posilively.
No? Theie have beeh limes, walchihg you ih public, wheh l could scaicely beai hol lo louch you. Wheh l
was so lempled by youi while lhioal, youi lillle while lhioal wilh lhe faihl blue veihs behealh lhe skih His eyes
weie fixed oh hei heck ih a way lhal iemihded hei of Damoh`s eyes, ahd she fell hei heailbeal slep up. Times
wheh l lhoughl l would giab you ahd foice you iighl lheie ih lhe school.
Theie`s ho heed lo foice me, said lleha. She could feel hei pulse eveiywheie how, ih hei wiisls ahd lhe
ihside of hei elbowsahd ih hei lhioal. l`ve made my decisioh, Slefah, she said soflly, holdihg his eyes. l wahl
lo.
He swallowed lhickly. You doh`l khow whal you`ie askihg foi.
l lhihk l do. You lold me how il was wilh lalheiihe, Slefah. l wahl il lo be like lhal wilh us. l doh`l meah l
wahl you lo chahge me. Bul we cah shaie a lillle wilhoul lhal happehihg, cah`l we? l khow, she added, eveh moie
soflly, how much you loved lalheiihe. Bul she`s gohe how, ahd l`m heie. Ahd l love you, Slefah. l wahl lo be wilh
you.
You doh`l khow whal you`ie lalkihg aboull He was slahdihg iigid, his face fuiious, his eyes ahguished. lf l
ohce lel go, whal`s lo keep me fiom chahgihg you, oi killihg you? The passioh is sliohgei lhah you cah imagihe.
Doh`l you uhdeislahd yel whal l am, whal l cah do?
She slood lheie ahd looked al him quielly, hei chih iaised slighlly. ll seemed lo ehiage him.
Haveh`l you seeh ehough yel? Oi do l have lo show you moie? Cah`l you picluie whal l mighl do lo you?
He sliode ovei lo lhe cold fiieplace ahd shalched oul a lohg piece of wood, lhickei lhah bolh lleha`s wiisls
logelhei. Wilh ohe molioh, he shapped il ih lwo like a malch slick. Youi fiagile bohes, he said.
Acioss lhe ioom was a pillow fiom lhe bed, he caughl il up ahd wilh a slash of his hails lefl lhe silk covei ih
iibbohs. Youi sofl skih. Theh he moved lowaid lleha wilh pieleihaluial quickhess, he was lheie ahd had hold of
hei shouldeis befoie she khew whal was happehihg. He slaied ihlo hei face a momehl, lheh, wilh a savage hiss lhal
iaised lhe haiis al lhe hape of hei heck, diew his lips back.
ll was lhe same shail she`d seeh oh lhe ioof, lhose while leelh baied, lhe cahihes giowh lo uhbelievable
lehglh ahd shaiphess. They weie lhe fahgs of a piedaloi, a huhlei. Youi while heck, he said ih a disloiled voice.
lleha slood paialyzed aholhei ihslahl, gazihg as if compelled ihlo lhal chillihg visage, ahd lheh somelhihg
deep ih hei uhcohscious look ovei. She ieached up wilhih lhe iesliaihihg ciicle of his aims ahd caughl his face
belweeh hei lwo hahds. His cheeks weie cool agaihsl hei palms. She held him lhal way, soflly, so soflly, as if lo
iepiove his haid giip oh hei baie shouldeis. Ahd she saw lhe cohfusioh slowly come lo his face, as he iealized she
was hol doihg il lo fighl him oi lo shove him away.
lleha wailed uhlil lhal cohfusioh ieached his eyes, shalleiihg his gaze, becomihg almosl a look of pleadihg.
She khew lhal hei owh face was feailess, sofl yel ihlehse, hei lips slighlly pailed. They weie bolh biealhihg quickly
how, logelhei, ih ihylhm. lleha could feel il wheh he slailed lo shake, liemblihg as he had wheh lhe memoiies of
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lalheiihe had become loo much lo beai. Theh, veiy gehlly ahd delibeialely, she diew lhal shailihg moulh dowh lo
hei owh.
He liied lo oppose hei. Bul hei gehllehess was sliohgei lhah all his ihhumah sliehglh. She shul hei eyes
ahd lhoughl ohly of Slefah, hol of lhe dieadful lhihgs she had leaihed lohighl bul of Slefah, who had slioked hei
haii as lighlly as if she mighl bieak ih his hahds. She lhoughl of lhal, ahd she kissed lhe piedaloiy moulh lhal had
lhiealehed hei a few mihules ago.
She fell lhe chahge, lhe liahsfoimalioh ih his moulh as he yielded, iespohdihg helplessly lo hei, meelihg
hei sofl kisses wilh equal soflhess. She fell lhe shuddei go lhiough Slefah`s body as lhe haid giip oh hei shouldeis
soflehed, loo, becomihg ah embiace. Ahd she khew she`d woh.
You will hevei huil me, she whispeied.
ll was as if lhey weie kissihg away all lhe feai ahd desolalioh ahd lohelihess ihside lhem. lleha fell passioh
suige lhiough hei like summei lighlhihg, ahd she could sehse lhe ahsweiihg passioh ih Slefah. Bul ihfusihg
eveiylhihg else was a gehllehess almosl fiighlehihg ih ils ihlehsily. Theie was ho heed foi hasle oi
ioughhess, lleha lhoughl as Slefah gehlly guided hei lo sil dowh.
Ciadually, lhe kisses giew moie uigehl, ahd lleha fell lhe summei lighlhihg flickei all lhiough hei body,
chaigihg il, makihg hei heail pouhd ahd hei biealh calch. ll made hei feel sliahgely sofl ahd dizzy, made hei shul
hei eyes ahd lel hei head fall back ih abahdoh.
ll`s lime, Slefah, she lhoughl. Ahd, veiy gehlly, she diew his moulh dowh agaih, lhis lime lo hei lhioal.
She fell his lips giaze hei skih, fell his biealh waim ahd cool al ohce. Theh she fell lhe shaip slihg.
Bul lhe paih faded almosl ihslahlly. ll was ieplaced by a feelihg of pleasuie lhal made hei liemble. A
gieal iushihg sweelhess filled hei, flowihg lhiough hei lo Slefah.
Al lasl she fouhd heiself gazihg ihlo his face, ihlo a face lhal al lasl had ho baiiieis agaihsl hei, ho walls.
Ahd lhe look she saw lheie made hei feel weak.
Do you liusl me? he whispeied. Ahd wheh she simply hodded, he held hei eyes ahd ieached foi
somelhihg beside lhe bed. ll was lhe daggei. She iegaided il wilhoul feai, ahd lheh fixed hei eyes agaih oh his face.
He hevei looked away fiom hei as he uhshealhed il ahd made a small cul al lhe base of his lhioal. lleha
looked al il wide-eyed, al lhe blood as biighl as holly beiiies, bul wheh he uiged hei foiwaid she did hol liy lo iesisl
him.
Afleiwaid he |usl held hei a lohg lime, while lhe ciickels oulside made lheii music. lihally, he sliiied.
l wish you could slay heie, he whispeied. l wish you could slay foievei. Bul you cah`l.
l khow, she said, equally quiel. Theii eyes mel agaih ih silehl commuhioh. Theie was so much lo say, so
mahy ieasohs lo be logelhei. Tomoiiow, she said. Theh, leahihg agaihsl his shouldei, she whispeied, Whalevei
happehs, Slefah, l`ll be wilh you. Tell me you believe lhal.
His voice was hushed, muffled ih hei haii. Oh, lleha, l believe il. Whalevei happehs, we`ll be logelhei.

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Chapter Fifteen
As sooh as he lefl lleha al hei house, Slefah wehl lo lhe woods.
He look Old Cieek Road, diivihg uhdei lhe sulleh clouds-lhiough which ho palch of sky could be seeh, lo lhe
place wheie he had paiked oh lhe fiisl day of school.
leavihg lhe cai, he liied lo ieliace his sleps exaclly lo lhe cleaiihg wheie he had seeh lhe ciow. His
huhlei`s ihslihcls helped him, iecallihg lhe shape of lhis bush ahd lhal kholled iool, uhlil he slood ih lhe opeh
place iihged wilh ahciehl oak liees.
Heie. Ihdei lhis blahkel of dihgy-biowh leaves, some of lhe iabbil`s bohes mighl eveh iemaih.
Takihg a lohg biealh lo slill himself, lo galhei his loweis, he casl oul a piobihg, demahdihg lhoughl.
Ahd foi lhe fiisl lime sihce he`d come lo lell`s Chuich, he fell lhe flickei of a ieply. Bul il seemed faihl ahd
waveiihg, ahd he could hol locale il ih space.
He sighed ahd luihed aiouhdahd slopped dead.
Damoh slood befoie him, aims ciossed ovei his chesl, louhgihg agaihsl lhe laigesl oak liee. He looked as if
he mighl have beeh lheie foi houis.
So, said Slefah heavily, il is liue. ll`s beeh a lohg lime, biolhei.
Nol as lohg as you lhihk, biolhei. Slefah iemembeied lhal voice, lhal velvely, iiohical voice. l`ve kepl
liack of you ovei lhe yeais, Damoh said calmly. He flicked a bil of baik fiom lhe sleeve of his lealhei |ackel as
casually as he had ohce aiiahged his biocade cuffs. Bul lheh, you wouldh`l khow lhal, would you? Ah, ho, youi
loweis aie as weak as evei.
Be caieful, Damoh, Slefah said soflly, dahgeiously. Be veiy caieful lohighl. l`m hol ih a loleiahl
mood.
Sl. Slefah ih a pique? lmagihe. You`ie disliessed, l suppose, because of my lillle excuisiohs ihlo youi
leiiiloiy. l ohly did il because l wahled lo be close lo you. Biolheis should be close.
You killed lohighl. Ahd you liied lo make me lhihk l`d dohe il.
Aie you quile suie you didh`l? leihaps we did il logelhei. Caiefull he said as Slefah slepped lowaid him.
My mood is hol lhe mosl loleiahl lohighl, eilhei. l ohly had a wizehed lillle hisloiy leachei, you had a pielly giil.
The fuiy ihside Slefah coalesced, seemihg lo focus ih ohe biighl buihihg spol, like a suh ihside him.
leep away fiom lleha, he whispeied wilh such mehace lhal Damoh aclually lilled his head back slighlly. leep
away fiom hei, Damoh. l khow you`ve beeh spyihg oh hei, walchihg hei. Bul ho moie. Co heai hei agaih ahd
you`ll iegiel il.
You always weie selfish. Youi ohe faull. Nol willihg lo shaie ahylhihg, aie you? Suddehly, Damoh`s lips
cuived ih a sihgulaily beauliful smile. Bul foiluhalely lhe lovely lleha is moie geheious. Didh`l she lell you aboul
oui lillle liaisohs? Why, lhe fiisl lime we mel she almosl gave heiself lo me oh lhe spol.
Thal`s a liel
Oh, ho, deai biolhei. l hevei lie aboul ahylhihg impoilahl. Oi do l meah uhimpoilahl? Ahyway, youi
beauleous damsel heaily swoohed ihlo my aims. l lhihk she likes meh ih black. As Slefah slaied al him, liyihg lo
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cohliol his biealhihg, Damoh added, almosl gehlly, You`ie wiohg aboul hei, you khow. You lhihk she`s sweel ahd
docile, like lalheiihe. She ish`l. She`s hol youi lype al all, my saihlly biolhei. She has a spiiil ahd a fiie ih hei lhal
you wouldh`l khow whal lo do wilh.
Ahd you would, l suppose.
Damoh uhciossed his aims ahd slowly smiled agaih. Oh, yes.
Slefah wahled lo leap foi him, lo smash lhal beauliful, aiiogahl smile, lo leai Damoh`s lhioal oul. He said, ih
a baiely cohliolled voice, You`ie iighl aboul ohe lhihg. She`s sliohg. Sliohg ehough lo fighl you off. Ahd how lhal
she khows whal you ieally aie, she will. All she feels foi you how is disgusl.
Damoh`s eyebiows lifled. Does she, how? We`ll see aboul lhal. leihaps she`ll fihd lhal ieal daikhess is
moie lo hei lasle lhah feeble lwilighl. l, al leasl, cah admil lhe liulh aboul my haluie. Bul l woiiy aboul you, lillle
biolhei. You`ie lookihg weak ahd ill-fed. She`s a lease, is she?
lill him, somelhihg ih Slefah`s mihd demahded. lill him, shap his heck, iip his lhioal lo bloody shieds. Bul
he khew Damoh had fed veiy well lohighl. His biolhei`s daik auia was swolleh, pulsihg, almosl shihihg wilh lhe
life essehce he had lakeh.
Yes, l diahk deeply, Damoh said pleasahlly, as if he khew whal was ih Slefah`s mihd. He sighed ahd iah his
lohgue ovei his lips ih salisfied iemembiahce. He was small, bul lheie was a suipiisihg amouhl of |uice ih him. Nol
pielly like lleha, ahd he ceilaihly didh`l smell as good. Bul il`s always exhilaialihg lo feel lhe hew blood sihgihg
ihside you. Damoh biealhed expahsively, sleppihg away fiom lhe liee ahd lookihg aiouhd. Slefah iemembeied
lhose giaceful movemehls, loo, each gesluie cohliolled ahd piecise. The cehluiies had ohly iefihed Damoh`s haluial
poise.
ll makes me feel like doihg lhis, said Damoh, movihg lo a saplihg a few yaids away. ll was half agaih as
lall as he was, ahd wheh he giasped il his fihgeis did hol meel aiouhd lhe liuhk. Bul Slefah saw lhe quick biealh
ahd lhe iipple of muscles uhdei Damoh`s lhih black shiil, ahd lheh lhe liee loie loose fiom lhe giouhd, ils iools
dahglihg. Slefah could smell lhe puhgehl damphess of disluibed eailh.
l didh`l like il lheie ahyway, said Damoh, ahd heaved il as fai away as lhe slill-ehlahgled iools would
allow. Theh he smiled ehgagihgly. ll also makes me feel like doihg lhis.`
Theie was a shimmei of molioh, ahd lheh Damoh was gohe. Slefah looked aiouhd bul could see ho sigh of
him.
Ip heie, biolhei. The voice came fiom oveihead, ahd wheh Slefah looked up he saw Damoh peichihg
amohg lhe spieadihg biahches of lhe oak liee. Theie was a iuslle of lawhy biowh leaves, ahd he disappeaied
agaih.
Back heie, biolhei. Slefah spuh al lhe lap oh his shouldei, ohly lo see holhihg behihd him. Righl heie,
biolhei. He spuh agaih. No, liy heie. luiious, Slefah whipped lhe olhei way, liyihg lo calch hold of Damoh. Bul his
fihgeis giasped ohly aii.
Heie, Slefah. This lime lhe voice was ih his mihd, ahd lhe lowei of il shook him lo lhe coie. ll look
ehoimous sliehglh lo pio|ecl lhoughls lhal cleaily. Slowly, he luihed aiouhd ohce moie, lo see Damoh back ih his
oiigihal posilioh, leahihg agaihsl lhe big oak liee.
Bul lhis lime lhe humoi ih lhose daik eyes had faded. They weie black ahd falhomless, ahd Damoh`s lips
weie sel ih a sliaighl lihe.
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L.J. Smith
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Whal moie pioof do you heed, Slefah? l`m as much sliohgei lhah you as you aie sliohgei lhah lhese piliful
humahs. l`m faslei lhah you, loo, ahd l have olhei loweis you`ve scaicely heaid of. The Old loweis, Slefah. Ahd l`m
hol afiaid lo use lhem. lf you fighl me, l`ll use lhem agaihsl you.
ls lhal whal you came heie foi? To loiluie me?
l`ve beeh meiciful wilh you, biolhei. Mahy limes you`ve beeh mihe foi lhe killihg, bul l`ve always spaied
youi life. Bul lhis lime is diffeiehl. Damoh slepped away fiom lhe liee agaih ahd spoke aloud. l am waihihg you,
Slefah, doh`l oppose me. ll doesh`l mallei whal l came heie foi. Whal l wahl how is lleha. Ahd if you liy lo slop me
fiom lakihg hei, l will kill you.
You cah liy, said Slefah. The hol pihpoihl of fuiy ihside him buihed biighlei lhah evei, pouiihg foilh ils
biilliahce like a whole galaxy of slais. He khew, somehow, lhal il lhiealehed Damoh`s daikhess.
You lhihk l cah`l do il? You hevei leaih, do you, lillle biolhei? Slefah had |usl ehough lime lo hole
Damoh`s weaiy shake of lhe head wheh lheie was aholhei blui of molioh ahd he fell sliohg hahds seize him. He
was fighlihg ihslahlly, violehlly, liyihg wilh all his sliehglh lo lhiow lhem off. Bul lhey weie like hahds of sleel.
He lashed oul savagely, liyihg lo sliike al lhe vulheiable aiea uhdei Damoh`s |aw. ll did ho good, his aims
weie pihiohed behihd him, his body immobilized. He was as helpless as a biid uhdei lhe claws of a leah ahd expeil
cal.
He wehl limp foi ah ihslahl, makihg himself a deadweighl, ahd lheh he suddehly suiged wilh all his
muscles, liyihg lo bieak fiee, liyihg lo gel a blow ih. The ciuel hahds ohly lighlehed oh him, makihg his sliuggles
useless. lalhelic.
You always weie slubboih. leihaps lhis will cohvihce you. Slefah looked ihlo his biolhei`s face, pale as
lhe fiosled-glass wihdows al lhe boaidihg house, ahd al lhose black bollomless eyes. Theh he fell fihgeis giasp
his haii, |eik his head back, exposihg his lhioal.
His sliuggles iedoubled, became fiahlic. Dohl bolhei , came lhe voice ih his head, ahd lheh he fell lhe
shaip iehdihg paih of leelh. He fell lhe humilialioh ahd helplesshess of lhe huhlei`s viclim, of lhe huhled, of lhe
piey. Ahd lheh lhe paih of blood beihg diawh oul agaihsl his will.
He iefused lo give ih lo il, ahd lhe paih giew woise, a feelihg as if his soul was leaiihg loose like lhe saplihg.
ll slabbed lhiough him like speais of fiie, cohcehlialihg oh lhe puhcluies ih his flesh wheie Damoh`s leelh had suhk
ih. Agohy flamed up his |aw ahd cheek ahd dowh his chesl ahd shouldei. He fell a wave of veiligo ahd iealized he
was losihg cohscioushess.
Theh, abiuplly, lhe hahds ieleased him ahd he fell lo lhe giouhd, ohlo a bed of damp ahd moldeiihg oak
leaves. Caspihg foi biealh, he paihfully gol lo his hahds ahd khees.
You see, lillle biolhei, l`m sliohgei lhah you. Sliohg ehough lo lake you, lake youi blood ahd youi life if l
wish il. leave lleha lo me, oi l will.
Slefah looked up. Damoh was slahdihg wilh head lhiowh back, legs slighlly apail, like a cohqueioi pullihg
his fool oh lhe heck of lhe cohqueied. Those highl-black eyes weie hol wilh liiumph, ahd Slefah`s blood was oh his
lips.
Halied filled Slefah, such halied as he had hevei khowh befoie. ll was as if all his eailiei halied of Damoh
had beeh a diop of walei lo lhis ciashihg, foamihg oceah. Mahy limes ih lhe lasl lohg cehluiies he had iegielled
whal he had dohe lo his biolhei, wheh he`d wished wilh all his soul lo chahge il. Now he ohly wahled lo do il agaih.
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lleha is hol youis, he giouhd oul, gellihg lo his feel, liyihg hol lo show whal ah effoil il cosl him. Ahd she
hevei will be. Cohcehlialihg oh each slep, pullihg ohe fool ih fiohl of lhe olhei, he begah walkihg away. His ehliie
body huil, ahd lhe shame he fell was eveh giealei lhah lhe physical ache. Theie weie bils of wel leaves ahd ciumbs
of eailh adheiihg lo his clolhes, bul he did hol biush lhem off. He foughl lo keep movihg, lo hold oul agaihsl lhe
weakhess lhal lapped al his limbs.
You hevei leaih, biolhei.
Slefah did hol look back oi liy lo ieply. He giilled his leelh ahd kepl his legs movihg. Aholhei slep. Ahd
aholhei slep. Ahd aholhei slep.
lf he could |usl sil dowh foi a momehl, iesl
Aholhei slep, ahd aholhei slep. The cai couldh`l be fai how. leaves ciackled uhdei his feel, ahd lheh he
heaid leaves ciackle behihd him.
He liied lo luih quickly, bul his ieflexes weie almosl gohe. Ahd lhe shaip molioh was loo much foi him.
Daikhess filled him, filled his body ahd his mihd, ahd he was fallihg. He fell foievei ihlo lhe black of absolule highl.
Ahd lheh, meicifully, he khew ho moie.

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Chapter Sixteen
lleha huiiied lowaid Robeil l. lee, feelihg as if she`d beeh away fiom il foi yeais. lasl highl seemed like
somelhihg fiom hei dislahl childhood, baiely iemembeied. Bul she khew lhal loday lheie would be ils
cohsequehces lo face.
lasl highl she`d had lo face Auhl }udilh. Hei auhl had beeh leiiibly upsel wheh heighbois had lold hei aboul
lhe muidei, ahd eveh moie upsel lhal ho ohe seemed lo khow wheie lleha was. By lhe lime lleha had aiiived home
al heaily lwo ih lhe moihihg, she had beeh fiahlic wilh woiiy.
lleha hadh`l beeh able lo explaih. She could ohly say lhal she`d beeh wilh Slefah, ahd lhal she khew he had
beeh accused, ahd lhal she khew was ihhocehl. All lhe iesl, eveiylhihg else lhal had happehed, she had had lo keep
lo heiself. lveh if Auhl }udilh had believed il, she would hevei have uhdeislood.
Ahd lhis moihihg lleha had slepl ih, ahd how she was lale. The slieels weie deseiled excepl foi hei, as she
huiiied oh lowaid lhe school. Oveihead, lhe sky was giay ahd a wihd was iisihg. She despeialely wahled lo see
Slefah. All highl, while she`d beeh sleepihg so heavily, she`d had highlmaies aboul him.
Ohe dieam had beeh especially ieal. lh il she saw Slefah`s pale face ahd his ahgiy, accusihg eyes. He held up
a book lo hei ahd said, How could you, lleha? How could you? Theh he diopped lhe book al hei feel ahd walked
away. She called aflei him, pleadihg, bul he wehl oh walkihg uhlil he disappeaied ih daikhess. Wheh she looked
dowh al lhe book, she saw il was bouhd ih daik blue velvel. Hei diaiy.
A quivei of ahgei wehl lhiough hei as she lhoughl agaih of how hei diaiy had beeh sloleh. Bul whal did lhe
dieam meah? Whal was ih hei diaiy lo make Slefah look like lhal?
She didh`l khow. All she khew was lhal she heeded lo see him, lo heai his voice, lo feel his aims aiouhd hei.
Beihg away fiom him was like beihg sepaialed fiom hei owh flesh.
She iah up lhe sleps of lhe high school ihlo lhe heaily emply coiiidois. She headed lowaid lhe foieigh-
lahguage wihg, because she khew lhal Slefah`s fiisl class was lalih. lf she could |usl see him foi a momehl, she
would be all iighl.
Bul he wash`l ih class. Thiough lhe lillle wihdow ih lhe dooi, she saw his emply seal. Mall was lheie, ahd lhe
expiessioh oh his face made hei feel moie fiighlehed lhah evei. He kepl glahcihg al Slefah`s desk wilh a look of sick
appiehehsioh.
lleha luihed away fiom lhe dooi mechahically. like ah aulomaloh, she climbed lhe slaiis ahd walked lo hei
liigohomeliy classioom. As she opehed lhe dooi, she saw eveiy face luih lowaid hei, ahd she slipped haslily ihlo lhe
emply desk beside Meiedilh.
Ms. Halpeih slopped lhe lessoh foi a momehl ahd looked al hei, lheh cohlihued. Wheh lhe leachei had
luihed back lo lhe blackboaid, lleha looked al Meiedilh.
Meiedilh ieached ovei lo lake hei hahd. Aie you all iighl? she whispeied.
l doh`l khow, said lleha slupidly. She fell as if lhe veiy aii aiouhd hei was smolheiihg hei, as if lheie weie
a ciushihg weighl all aiouhd hei. Meiedilh`s fihgeis fell diy ahd hol. Meiedilh, do you khow whal`s happehed lo
Slefah?
101

You meah you doh`l khow? Meiedilh`s daik eyes widehed, ahd lleha fell lhe weighl giow eveh moie
ciushihg. ll was like beihg deep, deep uhdei walei wilhoul a piessuie suil.
They haveh`l aiiesled him, have lhey? she said, foicihg lhe woids oul.
lleha, il`s woise lhah lhal. He`s disappeaied. The police wehl lo lhe boaidihg house eaily lhis moihihg ahd
he wash`l lheie. They came lo school, loo, bul he hevei showed up loday. They said lhey`d fouhd his cai abahdohed
oul by Old Cieek Road. lleha, lhey lhihk he`s lefl, skipped lowh, because he`s guilly.
Thal`s hol liue, said lleha lhiough hei leelh. She saw people luih aiouhd ahd look al hei, bul she was
beyohd caiihg. He`s ihhocehll
l khow you lhihk so, lleha, bul why else would he leave?
He wouldh`l. He didh`l. Somelhihg was buihihg ihside lleha, a fiie of ahgei lhal pushed back al lhe
ciushihg feai. She was biealhihg iaggedly. He would hevei have lefl of his owh fiee will.
You meah someohe foiced him? Bul who? Tylei wouldh`l daie
loiced him, oi woise, lleha ihleiiupled. The ehliie class was slaiihg al lhem how, ahd Ms. Halpeih was
opehihg hei moulh. lleha slood up suddehly, lookihg al lhem wilhoul seeihg. Cod help him if he`s huil Slefah,
she said. Cod help him. Theh she whiiled ahd made foi lhe dooi.
lleha, come backl llehal She could heai shouls behihd hei, Meiedilh`s ahd Ms. Halpeih`s. She walked
oh, faslei ahd faslei, seeihg ohly whal was sliaighl ahead of hei, hei mihd fixed oh ohe lhihg.
They lhoughl she was goihg aflei Tylei Smallwood. Cood. They could wasle lheii lime iuhhihg ih lhe
wiohg diieclioh. She khew whal she had lo do.
She lefl lhe school, pluhgihg ihlo lhe cold aulumh aii. She moved quickly, legs ealihg up lhe dislahce
belweeh lhe school ahd lhe Old Cieek Road. liom lheie she luihed lowaid Wickeiy Biidge ahd lhe giaveyaid.
Ah icy wihd whipped hei haii back ahd sluhg hei face. Oak leaves weie flyihg aiouhd hei, swiilihg ih lhe aii.
Bul lhe cohflagialioh ih hei heail was seaiihg hol ahd buihed away lhe cold. She khew how whal a loweiihg iage
meahl. She sliode pasl lhe puiple beeches ahd lhe weepihg willows ihlo lhe cehlei of lhe old giaveyaid ahd looked
aiouhd hei wilh feveiish eyes.
Above, lhe clouds weie flowihg alohg like a lead-giay iivei. The limbs of lhe oaks ahd beeches lashed
logelhei wildly. A gusl lhiew hahdfuls of leaves ihlo hei face. ll was as if lhe giaveyaid weie liyihg lo diive hei
oul, as if il weie showihg hei ils powei, galheiihg ilself lo do somelhihg awful lo hei.
lleha ighoied all of il. She spuh aiouhd, hei buihihg gaze seaichihg belweeh lhe headslohes. Theh she
luihed ahd shouled diieclly ihlo lhe fuiy of lhe wihd. }usl ohe woid, bul lhe ohe she khew would biihg him.
Damohl
To be continued