Running Head: COPING WITH STRESS 1

Ways of Coping with Stress and How Stress Affects Us

Ashley Lindsey
Salt Lake Community College

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Ways of Coping with Stress and How Stress Affects Us
According to Author Richard Lazarus, (1996) Stress arises when individuals perceive
they cannot adequately cope with the demands being made on them or with threats to their well-
being. (p. 58). In todays world, stress is all around us, from work to school, to even sometimes
at home. In this paper you will find ways to help cope with stress and how stress can affect us.
There are a lot of ways to get stressed, events like death, divorce, loss of a job, starting a
new job, finances, getting married, moving, chronic illness, injury or conflict with others all
cause stress. But there are also many ways to help deal with stress. For instance, meditation,
exercise, reading (and a lot more) all help with dealing with stress.
I asked my family to see if they knew how to cope with stress. The most common
answers were exercise, meditation, sleep etc. When I asked my 14 year old brother he said that
he never gets stressed because he is always doing something to make him happy. But how do we
know when we are stressed? I know personally that when I get stressed I notice my stomach
starts to hurt and/or I get a headache. I also know that when I get stressed Im usually unable to
take a moment and realize that I am stressed in the first place.
According to Dr Layla Cassim the first step in dealing with stress is to recognize that you
are stressed. (Cassim 2013) We dont realize half the time that we are stressed. This seems to me
easier said than done. I know that when I get so stressed I am not able to think clearly.
According to Dr Donna M. White she states that Many people often do not realize they are
under stress until it has begun to consume them. It is important to recognize stress before it gets
out of control. (White, D. 2011) If we do not control our stress from the moment we recognize

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we are stressed, it only builds up more and more. If we can recognize that we are stressed it can
help us overcome that stress and be able to cope with our daily lives.
The second step is to brainstorm solutions as to what is stressing us out. (Cassim 2013)
The majority of my stress comes from an internal stressor. An internal stressor is those we create
in our minds. (White. 2011) I know that I create stress by over thinking problems that do not
really matter. I create stress for myself and doing this research has made me realize that. When it
comes to finding a solution to fix an internal stressor I personally think that nothing but yourself
can help fix the problem. When I tell myself to not worry about it and focus my mind on
something that does matter and makes me happy I am able to get rid of whatever was stressing
me out in the first place.
Research done by Layla, pointed out that the third step in dealing with stress is to do
something that makes us happy while we are stressed. (Cassim 2013) Thinking of or doing
something that makes me happy is the best way for me to deal with stress in my life. I know that
this works even if you skip steps one and two. Focusing on something that makes us happy is the
best way I personally think in dealing with stress because there is always something to make us
smile and be happy and not be stressed.
It is easy to become stressed again so the fourth and last step in Dr Laylas study is to
monitor yourself when you get stressed and then return back to step one if needed. (Cassim
2013) If only stress went away forever, but it does not as it is part of life. Stress is not always
harmful. Good stress allows you to stay alert and focused. For example, in a life-threatening
situation, the stress response ultimately can have life-saving results. It can also help you in
challenging situations, such as completing work tasks. However there is also bad
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stress. Bad stress can cause damage to your overall well-being (White. 2011). You need both
bad stress and good stress to live and learn. My advice when dealing with stress is simply focus
on what makes you happy. I know that I personally need to work on dealing with stress. I know
that after doing this research on dealing with stress I have improved my life in making it better
for my mental and physical health.
In the article by Lazarus he talks about some positive emotions that help deal with stress
such as love and hope. He states that Some forms of love are very distressing for one who loves,
such as when it is unrequited or in the process of fading or being lost. In American culture, hope
is generally considered to be a positive state of mind, but it is almost certainly conjoined with
anxiety because of the outcome of hoping is never assured. The same principle, incidentally
applies to the emotions of relief, happiness and pride (Lazarus, R.S. (2000)
How can stress affect us? Stress can affect us in many ways. But the two biggest ways it
can affect us is mentally and physically. I think in order to be affected with stress physically you
have to start being affected by stress mentally. Mentally we are so focused on what is stressing
us out that it causes us to have physical problems. Such as when some people get stressed they
tend to eat, which in the long run if they keep eating every time they get stressed out they will
eventually become obese. Not everyone who gets stressed and then eats automatically becomes
obese, but in the long run if the habit of eating does not stop eventually it will cause physical
problems in the future. In Dr Smiths article she talks about obesity and depression from stress.
According to Dr Smith she states Obesity and depression are often exacerbated by stress. Those
who suffer from these conditions report that they are unable to take the necessary steps to relieve

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their stress or improve their health and therefore engage in maladaptive coping behaviors
(Smith, S. 2012)
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is also another way we can be affected by stress.
PTSD is a disorder characterized by chronic physiological arousal, recurrent unwanted thoughts
or images of the trauma, and avoidance of things that call the traumatic event to mind. (Schater,
D.L., Gilbert, D.T., Wegner, D.M. 2013) (p.473) Stress can affect us in so many ways. I know
from personal experience that if we learn to control stress we are able to think more clear and
able to take control of the situation better.
In conclusion we can cope with stress by first knowing we are stressed, second figuring
out what is stressing us out and last fix the solution. We can all receive help. There are plenty of
ways we can cope with stress so it does not lead to worse endings. To me stress is all in the
mind, overcome your mind and you will overcome stress.










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References
Cassim, L. (2012) Optimal Health & Post Graduate study: A Stress Management &
Pharmaceutical Service. [Power Point Slides] Retrieved on July 2, 2014 from
http://laylacassim.co.za
Lazarus, R. S. (1996) Psychological Stress and the Coping Process. New York: NY McGrawHill
Lazarus, R.S. (2000 June) Toward Better Research on Stress and Coping. Retrieved on July 5,
2010 from http://bccp.bspu.unibel.by
Smith, S.(2012 January11) How Do I Know When I Am Stressed. Retrieved on July 11, 2014
from http://drstephaniesmith.com
Schacter, D.L., Gilbert, D. T., Wegner, D. M. (2013) Introducing Psychology Second (ed.). New
York, NY: Worth Publishers
White, D. (2011). Recognizing and Dealing with Stress. Psych Central. Retrieved on Aug 2,
2014 from http://psychentral.com/lib/lib/recognizing-and-dealing -with stress/0009966