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Are you Ready?

: Suppose your 21 year old child or best friend came to you and asked the
question, "How do you know if you are ready for marriage?" How would you respond? If it will
help, you may interview two other people and list their answers in your paper. As you consider
the factors predicting marital success, look at your own past relationships. What factors, such as
background, personality characteristics, and relationship characteristics, might have predicted the
quality of your relationship? Were any particular characteristics especially important for
you? Why?
If my 21 year old child asked me How do you know if you are ready for marriage? I
would respond by asking some of these questions: Do they love you for who you are? Are
they ready to support you, and be ready to have a family? Do you love them? And do you have
any doubts? When I got married I was 19, and I asked my mom the same question. She
responded the way I hoped she should, which was out of love, and genuine concern that this was
the right decision. She had met my now husband before we even started dating and she thought
he was a great guy.
I think it is really important to have the same background, and the same relationship
characteristics. In our book it states People usually marry others from their same large group-
such as nationality, ethnic group, or socioeconomic status with which they identify-because they
share common assumptions, experiences, and understanding. (Strong & Cohen, 2014, p. 279).
As I thought about this topic, I thought what the book said about endogamy. I think this is very
important to look at when youre deciding if youre ready to get married.
I used to date someone who was Polynesian and who had a very different culture and a
very different background then I did. This caused a lot of contention and caused us to break up.
His ideas of the quality of our relationship were much different that my quality of the
relationship. It wasnt that he was wrong and I was right, it was just the fact that we were raised
differently and had different ideas of relationship characteristics than I did because of our
different backgrounds and culture. When I started dating my husband, I fell in love at first sight
because he had all the characteristics that I wanted in a husband. The one thing that meant most
to me was that he was a hard worker and we had common believes.

Works Cited
Strong, B, & Cohen, T. F. (2014). The marriage and family experience: Intimate relationships in
a changing society (12th ed.). Belmont, CA: Wadsworth