Running head: CONFLICT STYLES

Conflict Styles and Who They Affect

Austin Hazelwood
University of Kentucky

CONFLICT STYLES

Just as communication is inevitable and unavoidable, so is the conflict that is bound to

arise from time to time with this form of interaction between people. Now while we are quick to
usually write off these instances as nothing more than squabbles amongst people we commonly
associate with, there are various methods in which these conflicts are dealt with, as well as being
selective as to what type of relationship those individuals are in. Five common conflict styles are
observed and studied in this field of research. Theses styles include avoiding, accommodating,
competing, compromising, and collaborating. These styles are rated in their effectiveness by a
win-lose scale. This means that the outcome is measured for both parties involved in the conflict.
To further examine this concept, I will provide insight and analysis of my conflict style regarding
my friends, and my family.
In most cases, the manner in which a conflict is dealt with will vary greatly depending on
who is directly involved in the situation. When reflecting upon how I interact with my family
during a conflict, I find that often the compromising style is implemented by both sides of the
conflict. Why is this however? Unlike most relationships with friends or acquaintances, family
relationships tend to be much more personal and intimate, revealing much more emotion. While
compromising is certainly not the most inefficient style, it is not the most effective either. Both
sides of the party experience a partial lose-lose outcome. The reason I believe this holds true for
my style, is that of personable emotion that is displayed. With a strong emotional connection
comes the likelihood that the same emotion will blind each side of the conflicts judgment from
time to time. Reinforcing the belief amongst themselves that the other side of the argument is
mostly wrong, and that their own personable viewpoint is more viable.
The conflict style of friendly relationship however, tends to be more efficient, in regards
to my own past experiences. Friends are often not merely circumstantial, but chosen our

CONFLICT STYLES

mutually consented. This of course being a dissimilarity from that of a family. Because of this, I
find there is more compatibility amongst the individuals who are in involved in a conflict of this
setting. The style of conflict that my friends and I would subconsciously utilize would be
collaborating, the most efficient and effective style of conflict. Collaborating is win-win style for
both parties of the conflict. Because friends share mutual understandability and compatibility,
they are able to achieve such an outcome. By talking out, analyzing, and brainstorming a
solution, both sides are able to gain more from the conflict than they lose. Unlike compromising,
which involves a more rash decision making process, and eventually causing both sides to lose
one aspect of the conflict. Friends who hold a truly strong bond, are normally able to solve a
conflict using this collaborative style of management.