Anda di halaman 1dari 3

Rachel Beck

AP Lit Period 4
November 7, 2014
Perspective Paper Cover Letter
The first go round of writing this paper went better than I expected. At first, I was
worried I wasnt going to be able to create a fully functioning scene that had movement
and that made sense. In my first draft, a clear scene was apparent. However, what I
struggled on was the perspective aspect. I had dialogue that was really confusing and I
didnt really express Celines point of view as much as I needed to. I also rushed through
the major climactic moment, causing my paper to become unbalanced. In my rewrite, the
first thing I focused on was adding dialogue tags to show who was talking. I also used
tags to add Celines thoughts and reactions to dialogue, which I think, helped clear up
point of view. The next thing I focused on was slowing down the middle chunk of the
paper to add detail and imagery and beautiful language. This helped not only balance out
the paper, but also call attention to the part I wanted to be really important. The final
thing I focused on with my rewrite was clearing up some awkward phrasing moments and
adding in vivid verbs and eloquent language to be consistent throughout the paper. I think
my rewrite has a clearer focus, a better-developed point of view, and a more balanced

Rachel Beck
AP Lit Period 4
November 7, 2014
A Love Discovered
The carriage bounced along the cobblestone as my shoulders sat squeezed
between the purple padded inside corner and his firm, uniformed bicep. Our hands
lingered and our fingers hesitantly intertwined. Temptation was mist in the air, diffusing
to every inch and to every corner. The grand arch of the hotel broadened ahead. His
sharp intake of breath sliced through the stuffy carriage air.
Youre coming in, yes? I questioned.
If I am welcome. My heart fluttered with his acceptance, and with a flicker in
my eye I turned towards the window.
Yes. The whisper barely escaped my lips as the carriage came to a halt.
Our breaths became short, our chests barely rising and falling. I could hear his
heart. He could hear mine. The door was whooshed open. In poured the warmth of the
day, beckoning to my wildest fantasies.
Come with me. My words erupted in a sudden burst of confidence.
Lead the way. The slight curve of his smirk sent my mind whirling.
Clumsily, I unlocked the door and unveiled my world to his. A nervous sweat
prickled my palms. My thumping heart almost broke through the surface of my chest.
This is lovely. He stepped forward.
Thank you. I stepped forward, longing for the touch of his hand.
His hand motioned for the plush, white chairs and I delicately sat. The minutes
went by slowly at first and conversation was shallow. Then something changed. He
shifted his knees towards me. His hands reached forward in an attempt to grasp mine,
finally. His head tilted to the right as if he was studying my face. His eyes staggered

between my eyes and my lips. We smiled together. We launched into talk of our dreams,
our hopes, and our wildest fantasies. I was utterly lost in the rhythm of his voice and the
movement of his pure lips. His world became mine.
Suddenly the beautiful glass vase we were living in shattered into a million
pieces. The window curtain was torn back, and I was violently ripped away from the
world of wonder I was wading in. Edward stood before me like a destructive rock.
Darling- I felt my world spiraling down a bottomless vortex.
I will have you gone within an hour. I will have a purse sent for your immediate
exigencies. Spit flew from his firing lips. His fists were clenched and shook with anger.
Edward. Please. Wait. Edward! No please. EDWARD! EDWARD HEAR ME
PLEASE DARLING. Tears began to blur my vision and block my attempts to explain.
Out by tomorrow His blunt response punched through my sternum.
With that he was gone, out of the door in a puff of wind, the remnants of which
ruffled the bottom of my dress. My feet and knees gave out. I crumpled to the pristine
floor. Tears plopped from the slant of my cheek to the polished mahogany.
Oh my darling Edward. I am so sorry. Please come back to me! The closed
door now imprisoned my hysterics. A buzz of panic filled my ears. He was gone.
The wonder and sparkle of the day vanished. The echoing of the slammed door
smothered my pure joy. Ache filled my blood and pumped throughout my entire body. I
longed to travel back and feel Edwards grasp around my waist. The feeling was
drowning, suffocating, deadly. Edward was gone.
He walked over from the safe white chairs, and scooped me up under my arms
like he was caring for a delicate, withering flower.
There, there my darling. All will be okay. He was warm. He was strong.
He was there.

Minat Terkait