Desirae Rowell
UWRT 1103-063
Jizi
Oct. 1, 2015
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I believe my core values are affection and kindness. However, I think
being a kind and caring person will naturally create other values. For
example, being a caring, generous person will lead to close relationships with
others involved in my life such as my friends and family. Within these close
relationships, you will want to exhibit loyalty and honesty, which are other
important values to me. I value helping others to achieve excellence and it
manifests from being around loving family and friends. My parents always
make my siblings and I a priority in their lives, even before themselves. My
mother especially has influenced these values. Being a nurse, it is her core
responsibility to love and care for others. When she comes home to our
family and continues her care work with us, I am inspired to do the same.
Watching her perform random acts of kindness for anyone she crosses paths
with definitely sets an example in my life. Surrounding myself with
wholesome friends who want the absolute best for each other inspires me as
well. My religion also calls on me to be a loving person and it almost feels
second nature. As time goes by and I continue to give, my generosity and
kindness continues to develop. Ive found that living my life in a generous
way brings happiness to myself and others.
Not only people have influenced the way I am, but events as well.
During my sophomore year of high school, my support systems including my
friends and family began to cripple. At home, the bonds within my family
weakened due to disagreements and disapproval among each other. This
created many arguments where nothing had been solved but everyone was
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emotionally distraught. I would then go to school and separate myself from
my peers because I didnt want to bother anyone with my problems. I felt
very alone at this time and kept it to myself. I experienced an emptiness in
my heart that nothing could fill and a feeling of hopelessness that
surrounded all my thoughts. What made it worse is that I would just silently
cry about it but keep the feelings bottled up. Eventually, I realized that
holding on to my own sorrows was not going to improve any situation. I
needed to look at things in different perspectives and let go of all my
negativity. I figured out that dwelling on unfortunate situations does nothing
but intensifies the pain. Overcoming my own sadness gave me a strong
sense of resilience that I take pride in. However, I know not everyone handles
problems in the same manner that I do. The kindness and generosity in my
heart comes from the fact that I dont want anyone to ever feel completely
helpless. I want people to know they can talk to me and their problems are
just as important to me as my own.
All throughout high school, I was commonly referred to as mom by
my peers. The nickname began as a joke because I would playfully nag my
friends in a nurturing manner, almost like a mother. As I made stronger
relationships with people, I deeply cared for my friends and wanted to see
them succeed. I unintentionally made it my duty to look out for the
classmates around me. Starting off with little favors such as driving someone
home or sharing my lunch, the mom joke became a responsibility I took on.
My mother obviously influenced these maternal-like instincts. Watching her
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interact and love others is the example I attempt to follow. She is definitely a
large piece of the person I am today. However, with the nurturing mother
instincts comes an idea that Im a relatively passive-aggressive person. I
used to wonder why I often heard Ask Desi or Get Desi to do it from my
peers at school. I think some people ask favors of me due to the fact that I
will most likely say yes. In return, this has created an attitude of carelessness
where I allow people to ask or take anything of me. I sometimes dont even
realize when its happening to me because Im so focused on being kind. I
hope I can continue to grow while becoming assertive, balancing my
generosity and strength in a healthy way.
Even though it can be seen as a weakness, I consider my kindness a
strength and work to exhibit it in a positive manner. A smile or words of
encouragement carry so much power that it can change a whole persons
mindset. This influence I have inspires positivity and calls on others to create
their own random acts of kindness. I believe these strengths have also
launched many leadership positions into my life. In high school, the
mother position came with responsibilities to lead my peers. I was named
a captain on my track and cheerleading team without even having to vote. A
lot of the underclassmen naturally look up to me as a role model so I was
thrusted into the leadership role by them. I was known to remain calm in all
situations while presenting good ideas that the team can agree on. I
responded to problems and negativity with kindness and positive words for
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my team. I was able to use my caring attitude to work hard for others as well
as myself, and hopefully lead a path of success.
I believe that there are rarely any circumstances that call for ill
emotions. This is because most of the circumstances that one finds
themselves in are temporary. Situations that wont matter in a day or week
shouldnt be such a prominent source of discomfort in somebodys life. I
believe people should let go of these negative feelings and find an inner
peace, or place where they experience happiness. Once a person has good
control over their emotions, they can live in a peaceful state of mind.
Happiness then derives from this peace. My peace came from myself. During
the low-point of my sophomore year, I had to find my own peace. I couldnt
rely on anyone else for my happiness. Although I felt defeated, the fighter in
me refused to lose. I worked hard to overcome the strong helpless emotions.
Every day I would remind myself to let go of the detrimental thoughts that
clouded my perspective of life. Eventually I conditioned myself to be
mentally and emotionally strong; this helped me to overcome my inner
conflict.
The most important part of this essay was the effect it had on me. I
had never thought about myself in such a manner because I have always
been focused on other people. Ive realized that a lot of my friends and
family have influenced the person I am today. Ive also realized I carry some
very strong qualities as a person. The resilience and strength I have to
overcome my own problems is truly a blessing in my eyes. Writing about the
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negatives and positives within my life in such depth has almost created a
new sense of confidence and happiness. I also think writing prompts that call
on people to think, instead of retelling a story influence better essays and
papers. I feel like a better writer because I was able to reflect on myself with
such emotional depth. I wasnt worried about writing well or comparing
myself to others because my essay was unique, only pertaining to me.
~Tell me the story of how you went about writing, and what was it like for you as you
were writing?
A lot of my paragraphs came straight from our assignments completed in class and for
homework. All I had to do was explain my thoughts thoroughly so they connected in my
writing. I would get on my laptop and type in what I wrote in class and was easily able to
change what I didnt like.