Final Reflective Essay Draft by Jeth Vang: Peer Reviewed by Jeremy Whallon

1.Introductory Paragraph/s: I want people to understand who I am from the way I write and to clearly
understand what it is that I am writing. Your overarching theme/metaphor throughout this piece seems to
be the earning to gain knowledge and skills to become a better writer so that your readers can
comprehend your message in your writings as you intend it. In your introductory paragraph you could
reference which evidence will be examined in the rest of the essay. One suggestion to improve this
section of the essay is that you could go into detail on your last statement in which you say, As I reflect
on this semester, I can say without a doubt that this class has provided me the proper tools and insight on
becoming not just a better technical writer, but a better writer overall, and state which specific tools you
have acquired and what led you to have the insight to begin with.

2. Supporting Paragraphs: The paragraph in which your evidence was the strongest was that of the
Writing Instructions. You went into detail on what the writing assignment consisted of and then
expressed the tasks and coordinated efforts of a group that were involved in following the assignment
through. One paragraph that could use more evidence is the Feasibility Report. I believe you can provide
more evidence in terms of going into detail concerning the skills and proficiencies necessary to construct
both an informative and persuasive proposal. Then you can discuss your reflection and revisions
discussing any insight or what ideas led you to alter your proposal into its final piece.
3. Organization: Number the paragraphs in the authors paper. Then, use the space below to describe the
purpose or main idea of each paragraph. Check to make sure the paper follows a consistent organizational
pattern and is effectively organized with clear paragraphs (focused around one sub-claim) and smooth
transitional/topic sentences. When you finish, suggest where the writer might improve the organization of
the paper through the use of transitional sentences, by focusing on one topic in each paragraph, by
restructuring the order of paragraphs, etc.
1.) This section was your introductory paragraph where you stated your thesis and attempted to
back it up by stating what you have learned along with quotes.
2.) In this section I believe you went into great depth on what you considered your selected
polished piece among the writing assignments.
3.) In this section you are discussing the writing assignment Writing Instructions and also went
into detail concerning what the assignments responsibilities included and how you and a group of people
met your goals and produced a revised professional document.
4.) In this section you discussed the writing assignment Feasibility Report and went into detail
concerning what you took away from your findings from the assignment but can maybe go into detail on
how you constructed the proposal to begin with to give your reflective essay more depth through
evidence.
5.) This section was your conclusion paragraph where you stated aspects that you liked about the
course and what you may take from it leading into the future.
4. Revision overview: List the two most important things the author should focus on during revision.

I believe the two most important things you can focus on during your revision is going more in depth on
the actual techniques and trains of thought that led you to revise the certain sections that you choose to
revise; and going more in depth on which ever writing assignment you are going to select as your
polished version out of all the writing assignments. That will give your reflective essay more depth
adding more evidence to the topics you choose to express.