MOST READ

MOST TRUSTED
MARCH 2016

HOW TO
CHANGE YOUR

BRAIN
PAGE 32

WHY WE
BEND THE
RULES

THE BOY
WHO DIED FOR
101 MINUTES

PAGE 80

PAGE 52

LIVING WITH THE WORLDS

MOST PAINFUL DISEASE
PAGE 40

10 KIDS AND ONE EPIC

HOCKEY ADVENTURE
PAGE 86

ALL ABOUT ADDICTION .................................... 21

LAUGHTER, THE BEST MEDICINE ...................... 51
DEPARTMENT OF WIT ........................................ 13

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Contents
MARCH 2016

Cover Story

32

Inside Out
Shedding light on the inner workings of the
brain. DA N I E L L E G R O E N , R U DY L E E A N D SA R A H

L I SS

Inspiration

40

The Butterfly Effect

Jonathan Pitre, 15, lives with a rare condition
that leaves him in constant agonyand hes
using his story to help others. DAV E C A M E R O N

PHOTOGRAPHY BY
MAUDE CHAUVIN/
MADORE
PRODUCTION;
(ASSISTANT)
PHIL BERNARD;
(MAKEUP) AMLIE
THOMAS; (TALENT)
MICHEL VALIRES;
(ICONS)
ISTOCKPHOTO

Humour

48

Bed Hog Dog

How our pets comfort trumps a good nights
sleep. B I L L B A R O L F R O M FA ST CO M PA N Y
Drama in Real Life

52

Dead for One Hour and 41 Minutes

After a toddler is found unconscious in an icy
creek, the fight for his life begins. D E R E K B U R N E T T
Environment

58

Predator vs. Predator

Disappearing sea ice in the North is
shrinking polar bear numbers and
swelling killer whale ranks. Can the
Arctic sustain both? S H A R O N O O ST H O E K

M IKE MACRI/M ACRI PHOTO.CA

FROM CANADIAN GEOGRAPHIC

Memoir

66

Arson in East York

When Alison Motluk woke up
to find a fire raging on her front
porch, she felt terrified. By the
time the ashes settled, she was
surrounded by her community.
F R O M TO R O N TO L I F E
ADDIT I ONAL MEDIA IN
OUR TABLET VERSIONS

P.

58

Vol. 188

| No. 1,127

MARCH 2016

Family

4 Editors Letter

72 Here I Go Again
on My Own

6 Contributors
7 Letters

My true story of how leaving

homeand growing upcan
take a lifetime. M I J I C A M P B E L L

P.

10

F R O M S E PA R AT I O N A N X I E T Y: A
CO M I N G O F M I D D L E AG E STO RY

Science

80 The Liars Club

Why even the most honest
among us bend the rules now
and then. J E N A P I N COT T
F R O M P SYC H O LO GY TO DAY

Editors Choice

86 The Great Northern

Hockey Adventure
For 10 Nunavut boys, travelling
south to play in a hockey
tournament isnt just a road
trip. Its a chance to prove how
good they are. DA N R O B S O N
F R O M S P O RT S N E T M AG A Z I N E

9 Finish This Sentence

16 Points to Ponder
51 Laughter, the Best Medicine

107 Trivia Quiz

71 @ Work

108 Sudoku

84 As Kids See It
100 Lifes Like That
2

103 Thats Outrageous!

105 Brainteasers

03 2016

rd.ca

109 Word Power

112 Quotes

BROOKE WEDLOCK

READER FAVOURITES

VOICES & VIEWS

10 Safe Haven
Michael Battista and Gareth
Henry help LGBT refugees gain
asylum in Canada. SA R A H L I S S
Department of Wit

13 True Fantasy
Unicorn-related articles found
in real scientific journals.

Money

26 Paying Your Dues

Handy tips to prepare for tax
season. L I SA COXO N
Culture

30 Sunny Disposition
Eternal optimist Neil Pasricha
finds a formula for positivity
with The Happiness Equation.
SA R A H L I S S

DAV I D N G F R O M M c SW E E N E YS . N E T

The RD Interview

14 Voice of Authority
Peter Mansbridge on acting
aspirations and what makes for
good news. CO U R T N E Y S H E A

GET SMART!

101 13 Things You Should

Know About Credit Cards

DA I N A L AW R E N C E

104 Rd.ca/connect
ART OF LIVING

March website highlights.

18 Cultivating Compassion
With some simple changes, a
kinder, gentler culture could be
within reach. B R A N D I E W E I K L E
Health

21 Changing Habits
How to recognize and reduce
your addiction risk.
SA M A N T H A R I D E O U T

Health

24 Case History
A medical mystery resolved.
SY D N E Y LO N E Y

P.

18

Editors Letter
MY FIRST EXPERIENCE with the perplexing inner workings of the brain
was in the late 1960s, when my grandfather suffered a stroke that left him
incapacitated on one side of his body. I remember visiting him in the
hospital and being struck that I, at age 12, could squeeze a rubber ball harder
than he could. Slowly, he regained use of his limbs, allowing
him to once again walk, mow the lawn and even drive, but his
throat remained paralyzed. My grandfather never spoke again.
Some of the damage to his brain was reversible, some not.
In the 1980s, I read The Man Who Mistook His Wife for
a Hat by Oliver Sacks. Its a gripping collection of anecdotes about people with a variety of unusual neurological ailments. I still think about the patient who
couldnt recognize his own leg and was convinced
someone had replaced it with another appendage.
He was so disgusted by the fake limb that he
threw it out of bedand was surprised when the
rest of his body followed suit. Another case featured a subject with perfect vision whose brain
would only see what was on her right-hand side.
To this day, the human brain remains deeply
mysterious, and researchers continue to make strides
in understanding our most essential organ. The cover
story, Inside Out (page 32), includes compelling firstperson stories and the latest medical insights. Whether
patients are using light therapy to cope with traumatic
neurological injuries or retraining their brains to manage
chronic pain, our minds ability to heal is extraordinary.
Send an email to
robert@rd.ca

ROGER A ZIZ

Mind Matters

Published by the Readers Digest Magazines Canada Limited, Montreal, Canada

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rd.ca

03 2016

Contributors
JOREN CULL

DAINA LAWRENCE

(Illustrator, True
Fantasy, page 13)

(Writer, 13 Things
You Should Know
About Credit Cards,
page 101)

Home base:
Toronto. Previously
published in The New York Times
and The Walrus. I dont believe in

unicorns, but I believe in the power

of imagination. If you have enough
faith in something, it can influence
your life as much as anything real.
My favourite mythological creature is probably Prince. 1999 is

such a good album, one of the

best of the 80s.

GRAEME BAYLISS

(Photographer, Safe
Haven, page 10)

(Writer, On the Road

page 103)

Home base:
Toronto. Previously

Home base:
Toronto. Previously
published in The Walrus and Maisonneuve. This story made me con-

a major donation and sponsorship.

I was grateful that I was there to capture the moment and their feelings
of accomplishment and happiness.
When photographing people, I
try to be kind and relatable. It helps
elicit real smiles and emotions.
|

03 2016

products beyond manufacturers

guarantees. My most memorable
credit card purchase was the
ticket to Ireland I bought after finishing high school. I have returned
there almost a dozen times since.

BROOKE WEDLOCK

published in Chatelaine and Reno

and Decor. Just before our photo
shoot, Rainbow Railroad received

Home base: Vancouver. Previously

published in The Globe and Mail
and Macleans. I was surprised to
learn that credit cards often cover

rd.ca

sider lobbying for more unmanned

robot cars. When it comes to driving,
hell really is other people. Were
drawn to outrageous stories. We like
to be reminded that, no matter what
havoc weve wreaked behind the
wheel, it cant compare to the stupidity of driving a motorized picnic table.

Letters
READERS COMMENT ON OUR RECENT ISSUES

TOTAL RECALL
I can still vividly remember
being in Grade 4 and learning
In Flanders Fields for the first
time. I had an awesome teacher
who told us the story behind
the poem, and I grew up picturing the crosses row on row.
I hoped John McCraes words
would never be forgotten.
Thank you for bringing back
those memories with your story
The Power of Remembrance
(November 2015).
SHARLENE REID, Po w el l Riv er, B .C .

MIKO MACI ASZ EK

THE WAY I SEE IT

I recently read your article One
Life to Give (December 2015),
about Free the Children founder
Craig Kielburger. I disagree with
David Jefferesss statement, If
you go to a We Day, you learn
very little about the causes and
conditions of suffering in the
rest of the world. As an educator

who has taken students to We

Days in Winnipeg, Calgary and
Saskatoon, Ive watched young people develop an understanding
of the factors that can help eliminate global poverty: access to
education, clean water, health
care, viable incomes, etc. We Day
also showcases successful youthcreated projects, giving kids a
rd.ca

03 2016

READERS DIGEST

sense of empowerment and inspiring

personal action.
KELLY WATERS, B a t t l e f o rd , S a s k .

ONE HAPPY CUSTOMER

I wanted to let you guys know that
buying my first Readers Digest
back in the 1950s was probably the
best thing Ive ever done! Ive read
every single issue since then, and
the magazine is the only thing Im
excited to receive in my mailbox.
I especially like your Finish This
Sentence page!
NAJAT DRAXLER, O t t a w a

to get started. These days, I find it

very calmingits sort of like meditation.
CARRIE CORMIER, S u r r e y , B . C .
My husband and I each got two
books for Christmas last year. We
spent an entire day in late December
colouring and watching Harry Potter
movies. It was a great staycation.
CINDY DAVIDSON-PICKETT, Tr e n t o n , O n t .

I love my colouring books. Im dating

each page as I finish it and jotting
down important things that have
happened that daylike a diary.
CATHARINE LINN ATKINS MIDDLETON,

NOT JUST FOR KIDS

Our story about adult colouring
books, Fine Lines (December 2015),
generated many responses on Facebook. Heres what readers had to say
about the international trend.
I had a brain tumour removed a
little over a year ago, and my very
considerate son thought colouring
might help provide some fun mental
exercise. When I received two books
a few months back, I couldnt wait

Barrie, Ont.

I have three colouring books. They

sit on my coffee table. When I get
anxious, I look at them and think,
If I had to use them, Id go crazy! So
I turn on the TV instead. Seriously,
my books are more anxiety inducing
than calming.
MARY JO WELCH, B ra n d o n , Ma n .

Published letters are edited for length

and clarity.

We want to hear from you! Have something to say about an article you read in Readers Digest? Send your
letters to letters@rd.ca. Please include your full name and address.
Contribute Send us your funny jokes and anecdotes, and if we publish one in a print edition of Readers
Digest, well send you $50. To submit, visit rd.ca/joke.
Original contributions (text and photos) become the property of The Readers Digest Magazines Canada
Limited, and its affiliates, upon publication. Submissions may be edited for length and clarity, and may be
reproduced in all print and electronic media. Receipt of your submission cannot be acknowledged.

03 2016

rd.ca

FINISH THIS SENTENCE

Im finally ready to
finish school and help

retire
with
gusto

my family back home in the Philippines.

ONTHOY JIMENEZ VILLAMO, TORONTO

in Lillooet, B.C.

grow older gracefully!

PATRICIA WAYNE,
CALGARY

MARY SCHREINERT, GODERICH, ONT.

...give up

sugar and
processed
foods for good.
CHARLIE POND,
HAMILTON

let the
love in!

KATHARINE ANGELINA
LOVE, TORONTO

become the
best darn mama I can be.

put years of addiction behind me and

SAMANTHA JOLENE, CAT LAKE FIRST NATION, ONT.

Visit the Readers Digest Canada Facebook page for your chance to finish the next sentence.
rd.ca

03 2016

VOICES & VIEWS

Michael Battista and Gareth Henry help
LGBT refugees find asylum in Canada

Safe Haven
BY SARAH LISS
PHOTOGRAPHY BY BROOKE WEDLOCK

GARETH HENRY WAS 15 years

old the first time he had to uproot his
life because of who he was. Growing
up in St. Mary, a rural enclave on
Jamaicas northern coast, he realized
his attraction to other boys might
endanger him, especially in his small
community. In Jamaica, acts of male
homosexuality are punishable with
up to 10 years in jail. In 1993, brave
but bewildered, he left his sister,
mother and grandmother and set
out for the nearby city of Kingston.
Once there, Henry immersed
himself in activism. He became a
founding member of J-FLAG (the
Jamaican Forum for Lesbians, AllSexuals and Gays), and when the
head of that organization was
stabbed to death in a homophobic
10

03 2016

rd.ca

attack, he volunteered to replace

him. I was in my early 20s, a naive
little boy, and I said, Okay, I will.
The increased visibility made
Henry a target, and in 2007, police
beat him in front of 200 bystanders.
He went into hiding soon after, but
his aggressors tracked him down
and threatened to kill him. Thats
when Henry knew he had to flee
againthis time, at the age of 30,
beyond his countrys borders.
Henry arrived in Canada in early
2008. Because of his profile as an
international gay- and lesbian-rights
advocate, he was granted asylum.
But even as Henry adjusted to his
new life, his mind turned to others
who werent as lucky. I had a place
to live, I had supportwhich

When Gareth Henry

(right) was claiming
refugee protection in
Canada, immigration
lawyer Michael Battista
represented him.

READERS DIGEST

is what I hoped there would be for

every refugee, he says.
Thats when Henry connected
with Rainbow Railroad. Started
in 2006 by grassroots activists, the
Toronto-based group was worried
about state-sanctioned violence
against members of the international LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual
and transgender) community. The
organizations goal, says founding
member Michael Battista, was simple: to help people make it from a
place of danger to a place of safety.
Applicants must be living in a
country where homosexuality is
criminalized; from there, volunteers
cross-reference details with contacts
on the ground and members of local
LGBT groups and, in many cases, follow up with interviews over Skype.
Rainbow Railroad then provides
funds, guidance and information to
persecuted individuals looking for
refuge in countries with a progressive
stance on LGBT rightsprimarily in
Western Europe and North America.
Things moved very slowly for the
first two years of Rainbow Railroads
existence, according to Battista. But
Henrys arrival as a volunteer in 2009
marked a turning point. We started
working with him to identify those
most at risk in Jamaica, and he was
very effective at referring people facing real threats thanks to his on-theground connections. By 2013, Henry
had helped 36 individuals from the
12

03 2016

rd.ca

Caribbean gain asylum in Canada,

just as he had.
Rainbow Railroad has expanded
dramatically since its inception. In
2014, the group handled more cases
than ever before, funding the airfare
and travel of 33 individuals from Jamaica, Nigeria and Uganda. (It also
provided basic supplies to asylum
seekers in hiding prior to emigration.)
In 2015, staff fielded 281 pleas from
would-be claimants that flooded in
through various channels, including
email, social media and community
organizations. Rainbow Railroad is
currently working on creating safe
routes throughout the Middle East
and South and Central Asia.
While the organization offers vital
financial and administrative assistance, its often the psychological
and emotional support that means
the most to asylum seekers. Thats
also at the heart of why Rainbow
Railroad is so important to Henry.
What theyre going through is my
lived experience, says the man still
shaken by the murder of 13 friends
during his four years with J-FLAG.
Henry, who knows first-hand the
sacrifices that can be involved with
daring to live fully, dreams of seeing
Rainbow Railroad bridge continents.
I want to build safe houses around
the world, create resources, help
LGBT people get a second chance
at life. I want them to be able to be
their authentic selves.

DEPARTMENT OF WIT

Unicorn-related
articles found in real
scientific journals

True
Fantasy
BY DAV I D N G
F R OM M C SW EEN EYS . NET
ILLUSTRATION BY JO R EN CULL

Beheading the Unicorn: An Adventure in Surgery

Jo u r n a l o f t h e Am e r i c a n C o l l e g e
of Surgeons

Child Psychiatry Perspectives:

If You See a Unicorn, You Are
Obligated to Report It
Jo u r n a l o f t h e Am e r i c a n A c a d e my o f C h i l d
& Adolescent Psychiatr y

Polymyositis: Not a Unicorn or

Mythological Beast but Maybe
a Duck?
Ne u r o l o g y : T h e O f f i c i a l Jo u r n a l o f t h e
Am e r i c a n A c a d e my o f Ne u r o l o g y

How to Show That Unicorn Milk

Is a Chronobiotic: The Regressionto-the-Mean Statistical Artifact
C h r o n o b i o l o g y In t e r n a t i o n a l

Unicorn Tapestries, Horned

Animals and Prion Disease
Em e r g i n g In f e c t i o u s D i s e a s e s

Rats, Cats and Elephants, but Still

No Unicorn: Induced Pluripotent
Stem Cells From New Species
Cell Stem Cell

Never Play Leapfrog With a

Unicorn
C r i t i c a l C a r e Me d i c i n e

2015 BY DAVID NG. M C SWEENEYS.NET

rd.ca

03 2016

13

THE RD INTERVIEW

Anchorman Peter Mansbridge on public broadcasting,

acting aspirations and what makes for good news

Voice of Authority
BY CO U R T N E Y SH E A
ILLUSTRATION BY AIME VAN DRIMMELEN

Looking back, 2015 was a pretty huge year

for news. Did it feel that way for you?
It was well-rounded. You had the war stories
with Syria and Iraq and the emotional reaction to the refugees, which connected with
people all over the world. Domestically, you
had the election, which we knew was going
to be big, but then it was much bigger than
wed anticipated. A change of government,
a new leader who is young and engaged
And also very handsome.
Ha! He seems to have that going
for him.
This month you have a
cameo in Disneys Zootopia, voicing a moose
named Peter Moosebridge. How did that
come about?
I got started in this
business at age 19
14

03 2016

rd.ca

I was working at an airport, and

someone heard my voice over the
PA system and offered me a job at
the local radio station. With this film,
I was at an airportonce again. I was
going through security in Toronto on
my way to Vancouver, and the guy
behind me said, We were just talking
about you in a meeting! Turns out,
he was the Canadian vice-president
of marketing at Disney. Zootopia is a
childrens movie with a good message
about fairness and equality. I only
have two or three lines. I was excited
to do it for my grandkids.
Last year you appeared on an episode of Murdoch Mysteries. Has
Canadas most venerable newsman
caught the acting bug?
No, no. Im married to an actor.
I think shes kind of jealous that I
have a part in what will be a huge
filmI feel it could be the next Frozen. When I came home and told
that to my wife [Cynthia Dale], she
was not impressed.
During times of upheaval, do
you miss hopping on a plane
and going to the story?
I still go on the road as often
as I can. I was in Paris right
after the attacks. Part of me
loves that. I was a reporter
for 20 years. I was okay,
but I wasnt great. I understand where Im best used.

Its like a good hockey team, where

the coach and the manager know
where to put their players.
When you were inducted into the
Canadian News Hall of Fame last
November, you said that public
broadcasting isnt about being popular, its about being relevant. Can
you explain that distinction?
Newscasters are constantly tempted
to cover whats popularwatercooler stories and all that. The public broadcaster is there to deal with
whats important. There are things
about the day that are funnyyou
dont want to give viewers the
sense the world is going to end
when the newscast doesbut its
a question of where you dwell.
How do you feel when you see someone in the vein of Kim Kardashian
being described as a newsmaker?
Lets put it this wayshes never
been a newsmaker on my program.
So its safe to say we wont see you
sitting down with a reality TV star
any time soon?
I dont think so. Id like to interview
Justin Bieber. Were both from Stratford, Ont. He comes home a lot
more than most people realize. You
hear his jetits the only jet that
comes into the Stratford airport.
Zootopia is out March 4.
rd.ca

03 2016

15

BY CH RISTINA PALASS I O

Its critical that someone who

was not initially imagined to
be an ideal Rhodes Scholar be
named a Rhodes Scholar,
especially in a time of
reconciliation.

I found it quite irritating that I

wasnt trusted to communicate the
messages from my own work, that
the only person who could effectively convey the messages from my
work was a communications expert.
KRISTI MILLER, m o l e c u l a r
geneticist in the Department of
Fi s h e r i e s a n d O c e a n s , on how it felt

BILLY-RAY BELCOURT on becoming the

first Aboriginal person in Canada to receive the
prestigious fellowship

to be forbidden to speak to the

media under the Harper government

I am not a doomsayer, but I do

believe we have to acknowledge the
doomsday-type consequences if we
do not act in time to prevent them.

My pre-surgery routine is having a

major fall or accident.

The late environmentalist and

e n t r e p r e n e u r MAURICE STRONG
on climate change

If they start to
censor beauty
pageantshow
pathetic is that?
Mi s s Wo r l d C a n a d a ANASTASIA LIN,

to CBC News,

on being declared persona non grata by the Chinese

government for her political beliefs

16

03 2016

rd.ca

O l y m p i c b r o n z e m e d a l s ki e r
JAN HUDEC, w h o h a s h a d e i g h t

kn e e s u r g e r i e s ,

in the Toronto Star

PHOTOS: (BELCOURT) THE GATEWAY 1910-2015; (LIN) A NASTASIALIN.COM. QU OTE S: ( BE LCOU RT) THE G LOBE AND M AIL ( NOV. 23, 201 5) ;
(STRONG) MAURIC ESTRONG.NET; (M I LLER) TH E GLO BE AND MAIL (NOV. 1 2, 201 5) ; ( HU D E C) NOV. 23, 201 5; ( L IN) NOV. 26 , 201 5.

Points to Ponder

PHOTOS: (KENNEDY) 2015 RESPECT IN SPORT; (LINDHOUT) NIGEL BRENNAN. QUOTES: (KENNEDY) NOV. 20, 2015; (PETERS) U OF T MAGAZINE
(2012); (LINDHOUT) MACLEANS (NOV. 5, 2015); (ANTHONY) NOV. 2015; (HYNES) FACEBOOK.COM; (SETH) NOV. 16, 2015.

Ive had to practise

acceptance. I
believed I didnt
deserve to live, and
now people are
calling me a hero.
SHELDON KENNEDY, f or m e r N H L pl a y e r a n d
su r v i v o r o f c hi l d h o o d s e xu al abu s e, in The Walrus

I was refuted and shunned by

most of the outstanding surgeons
in the States.
T h e l a t e ra d i a t i o n o n c o l o g i s t
DR. VERA PETERS on the backlash her research
received as she worked to revolutionize treatments for
Hodgkins lymphoma and breast cancer in the 1950s

Despite our differences, somehow,

impossibly, unexpectedly
and delightfully, we have
become friends.
Ho s t a g e - t u r n e d h u m a n i t a r i a n AMANDA LINDHOUT

A few years back, Ireland declared

binge drinking and drug abuse to be
national emergencies, and I cant
help but believe the same applies to
our beautiful little island, too. Newfoundland and Labrador needs help.
We are crying out for real leadership.
We are fu**ing DYING for proper
facilities to treat our addictions and
mental illnesses.
Actor and author
JOEL THOMAS HYNES, w h o s e u n c l e ,

m u s i c i a n R o n Hy n e s , s t r u g g l e d
with addiction before his death
in November 2015

on her

friendship with Omar Khadr

We could spend an afternoon eating

lead paint and rubbing asbestos
on each other. Anything we did
because it hadnt been done before
was the most brilliant TV ever.

I grew up with comic books and

newspaper funniesJack Kirby and
Charles Schulzbut when I saw the
big, wondrous and iconic New Yorker
cartoon collections of the mid-century, it was like discovering gold.

STEVE ANTHONY on being a VJ in the

C a r t o o n i s t SETH,

early days of MuchMusic, in Elle Canada

in the New Yorker

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03 2016

17

ART of LIVING
With some simple changes, a kinder,
gentler culture could be within reach

Cultivating
Compassion
BY BRAND IE WE IK LE

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IN A WORLD FILLED with

headlines about mass shootings
and terrorist attacks, its easy to
wonder, Whats wrong with people
these days?
Thats a fair question. One study
that was released by the University
of Michigan in 2010 seems to suggest were collectively becoming
less considerate. After surveying
college students, lead researcher
Sarah Konrath discovered a 40 per
cent decline in empathythe ability to relate to the feelings and
perspectives of othersover the
previous 30 years. Konrath and her
team attributed this trend to an
overall spike in narcissism, individualism and material self-interest
and linked it to a waning inclination to show concern for others
and adopt their perspectives. While
this rate of decline appeared to
be relatively stable between 1979
and 1999, it nearly tripled after the
year 2000.
That study started a public conversation about whether were collectively becoming more heartless
in general. But before you bemoan
the collapse of civilized society,
fear not: experts say we can take
steps to reverse this trend.

Make Time to Connect

In their 2010 book, Born for Love:
Why Empathy Is Essentialand
Endangered, American psychiatrist

Bruce D. Perry and journalist Maia

Szalavitz suggest our culture faces
a crisis of disconnection. Between
1985 and 2004, they report, the proportion of people who claimed they
had no confidants at all jumped from
10 to 24.6 per cent, while 80 per cent
of respondents said theyd only confide in family members.
According to Mary Gordon, the
founder and president of the Canadian not-for-profit group Roots of
Empathy, the pace of modern life is
partly to blame for waning levels of
consideration. We may be in touch
with our friends through quick
texts and emails, she says, but
face to face, someone can smile at
you, touch your arm, give you
a hug or have a laugh with you
all things that release endorphins.
With fewer in-person interactions,
its hard to decipher what might be
going on in the hearts and minds
of those around us, knowledge
that informs our behaviour toward
one another.
To remedy this, make your social
life a priority, says Gordon. She
recommends going for lunch with
a friend or colleague instead of eating at your desk. At the Roots of
Empathy office, co-workers walk
the stairs together for exercise, and
from time to time, the group organizes staff bowling trips in an effort
to strengthen collegial connections. If your weekends are too full
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19

READERS DIGEST

of family obligations to contemplate a dinner party, she suggests

doing something simple, like grocery shopping with a friend and
grabbing a coffee afterwards.

Be Mindful of
Stress Levels

sistic, she says. They may just be

reacting to adverse factors in their
environments. If someone is curt
or critical, she offers, try saying
something kind, like, Its chaotic in
here. It must be challenging. If we
demonstrate empathy, were
far more likely to receive
it in return.

Life has become more

stressful, and any kind
of stress may miniFeed Your Sense
mize our empathetic
of Wonder
capacities, says GorA growing body of
don. If youre preocevidence points to a
cupied by worries that
connection between
you might lose your
empathy and experijob, for example, its
ences that inspire
easy to develop a kind
awe, like taking in the
of tunnel vision.
view from a mounLoren Martin, an
taintop or marvelling
People arent
assistant professor
at undersea life while
deliberately
in the department of
scuba diving. Some
being selfish, says new research that was
psychology based out
Gordon. They may published by the Jourof the University of
Toronto Mississauga,
just be reacting to nal of Personality and
has studied the relaSocial Psychology in
adverse factors
tionship between anx2015 found that being
in their
iety and compassion.
exposed to wonder
environments.
Based on his research,
helps us focus on the
he posits that stress
world beyond ourmay interfere with
selves and keeps us
higher-order cognitive empathetic attuned to the welfare of others.
behaviourslike being able to apSo try embarking on that rainforpreciate the perspective of others.
est tour youve always contemGordon suggests we remember
plated. Not only will it feed your
that link in our everyday interacyen for adventure, but it may ultions. Its not that people are
timately wind up strengthening
deliberately being selfish or narcisyour sense of compassion.
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03 2016

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HEALTH

How to recognize and

reduce your addiction risk

Changing Habits
BY SA M A N T H A R ID E O UT

MASTERF ILE

! WHY DO SOME PEOPLE

become addictedto alcohol, gambling, sleeping pillswhile others

who use the same substances or
engage in the same activities dont
fall prey? Its a puzzle that seems
to involve genetics, environment,
personal history and temperament.
One of the personality traits under investigation is sensation seeking, which denotes an appetite for
new, varied, intense experiences
and a willingness to take risks to get
them. This characteristic increases
the likelihood of substance abuse,
but its also associated with hobbies

such as scuba diving, mountain

climbing and travelling to far-flung
places. Some experts encourage
sensation seekers to focus on these
healthier habits as an addictionprevention strategy.
A tendency to act based on instincts or immediate desires rather
than longer-term outcomes is known
as impulsivity. Health researchers
around the world have observed that
people who are dependent on certain drugsincluding cocaine and
alcoholfrequently have abnormalities in parts of the brain that are
connected with restraint. Whats
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21

READERS DIGEST

and other substances can offer temnot clear at this point is to what
extent the impulsive personality trait porary stress relief. Ironically, drinking can aggravate anxiety over the
pre-exists and predisposes someone
long run by, among other things,
toward drug use, versus how much
interfering with the
of it is caused by the
normal functioning
drug use, says Karen
of the brains neuErsche, a lecturer on
Around
rotransmitters. Finddrug addiction at the
ing other ways to
University of Camrelaxtalking to
bridge in England
friends, exercising or
who is exploring this
eliminating stresquestion. In the case
of Canadians meet the
sors, for exampleis
of alcohol, expericriteria for alcohol abuse
a good way to avoid
ments suggest that
or dependence at some
point in their lives.
potential problems.
abstinence helps rePersonality alone
grow damaged neurdoesnt determine
ons and reverse
who is prone to addiction, but if
impairments to self-control.
yours puts you at a greater risk, it
Also among those who run a
wont hurt to make health-related
heightened risk of addiction: anxdecisions accordingly.
ious people. This is because alcohol

18

per
cent

Standing Desks Linked With

Sedentary Off Time
In a British study published in Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise,
40 office workers were given workstations that allowed them to either
sit or stand. After three months, the
subjects were more sedentary in
22

03 2016

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their leisure time than before, but

their sitting time still decreased
from 10 hours and five minutes a
day to nine hours and 21 minutes.
The researchers recommended
finding ways to be active outside
of work, to avoid cancelling out the
effects of sitting less on the job.

ISTOCKP HOTO

News From the

World of Medicine

Sleepwalkers Often Feel

No Pain After Accidents
After studying 47 people who had
hurt themselves at least once while
sleepwalking, researchers in Montpellier, France, found that 37 of
them didnt experience pain until
they woke up. One man climbed
onto his roof, fell off and broke his
leg but didnt awaken until morning.
Paradoxically, sleepwalkers were
more likely to experience chronic
pain and migraines in their waking
lives. This suggests a relationship
between sleepwalking brain activity
and malfunctioning pain perception, the researchers said.

Talk Therapy Better Than

Light Treatment for SAD
Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is
depression triggered by the shorter
days of winter. Light therapysitting
next to a bright box that simulates
the sunis considered the goldstandard treatment. However, a
University of Vermont study of 177
sufferers found that, when it comes
to preventing SAD from returning,
cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT)
is more effective. Once patients
learn coping strategies through
CBT, they keep them for life.

Degree of Chemo Brain

Depends on Drug Taken
One of chemotherapys potential
effects is long-lasting mental cloudi-

ness. A recent JAMA Oncology paper

compared breast-cancer patients who
received anthracycline-based therapy
to those who took other kinds of
chemo drugs. The womenparticipants in a study by Stanford University in Californiareported cognitive
dysfunction, but the anthracycline
patients performed significantly
worse on verbal memory tasks.

TEST YOUR MEDICAL IQ

Black carbon is

A. An air pollutant emitted by

vehicles
B. A toxin found in diseased
potatoes
C. A noxious fume produced by
malfunctioning home-heating
systems
D. A suspected carcinogenic
component of mobile phones
Answer: A. Black carbon is an
air pollutant associated with
respiratory and cardiovascular
health problems, as well as
climate change. In Western
countries, vehicles are the main
source, especially those with
diesel engines. To minimize
exposure, individuals can avoid
walking near heavy traffic, while
governments can pass regulations to improve air quality.

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03 2016

23

HEALTH

Case History
BY SY D N E Y LO N EY
ILLUSTRATION BY TRACY WALKER

THE PATIENT: Olivia, a 24-year-old

university student
THE SYMPTOMS: Hiccups, headache
and vomiting
THE DOCTOR: Dr. Anthony Traboulsee, a neurologist at UBC Hospital
in Vancouver

THREE YEARS AGO, Olivia

began hiccupingand couldnt stop.
The bouts, which lasted up to an
hour, would dissipate for a similar
amount of time, then reappear. Her
head ached. A couple days later, she
started vomiting. A hospital visit resulted in anti-nausea pills, but the
queasiness didnt stop. Because
throwing up can signal a brain tumour, her next trip to the ER two
days later led to a CT scan (the results
were negative), and a lumbar puncture to rule out meningitis.
24

03 2016

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A couple days after that, Olivias

vision blurred, and she had trouble
getting out of bed. Still stumped,
doctors put her on antibiotics in
case her problems were the result
of an infection, then monitored her
in the ICU. By the next morning,
the patient couldnt see and was
paralyzed from the neck down.
She was fully awake and aware
and very frightened, says neurologist
Dr. Anthony Traboulsee, who was
called in after an MRI revealed evidence of inflammation, swelling and
damage along Olivias brain stem and
spinal cord. The other doctors suspected acute disseminated encephalomyelitis (ADEM), a brief, intense
inflammation in that area, resulting
from a bacterial or viral infection. But
ADEM is more common in children
and is often mistaken for multiple

sclerosiswhich is itself often confused with neuromyelitis optica

(NMO). Traboulsee suspected this
last condition was the culprit.
Much like MS, NMO is a relapsing inflammatory disease that occurs
when a persons immune system
attacks the cells in their central
nervous system. It affects the optic
nerves and spinal cord, and sometimes the brain.

Without treatment, most

NMO sufferers wind up
in nursing homes.
The disease is rarewhile about
100,000 Canadians have MS, only
about 1,000 have NMO, Traboulsee
estimates. Its more aggressive
than MS, like a forest fire raging
through the nervous system, says
the doctor. Symptoms can include
blindness, weakness or paralysis,
spasms, vomiting, hiccups and loss
of bladder or bowel control due to
spinal cord damage. In Canada, the
only lab equipped to do the blood
test required to diagnose NMO is
in Calgary. It generally takes two
weeks to get the results.
Traboulsee sent the patients
blood to the lab but didnt wait to
hear back. Its like when someone
is drowning, he says. Without treat-

mentideally within 48 hours after

symptoms appearmost NMO sufferers wind up in a nursing home.
The doctor immediately started
Olivia on a plasma exchange to target the inflammation. A day or two
later, she could see shapes and wiggle her fingers and toes. He added
in chemotherapy, and Olivias recovery was quick and dramatic.
The plasma exchange removes the
sparks, but the chemotherapy puts
out the fire by removing the abnormal immune cells that are creating
the destructive antibodies in the
first place, Traboulsee explains.
After a week of receiving the combined treatment, Olivia regained her
sight and could walk again. Shes
now on long-term preventive treatment and takes azathioprine, an
immunosuppressant, twice a day.
There have been no relapses since
the initial attack. (When its not
treated, NMO has a 100 per cent rate
of recurrence.) Olivia was able to
finish her degree and hopes to someday get married and start a family.
Like with any rare illness, the key
is early treatment and preventive
care so people can lead normal
lives, Traboulsee says. But not every
doctor is aware of every rare disease. Because NMO is frequently
misdiagnosed and can be suddenly
severe, patients are sometimes written off. We can rescue them and give
them their lives back.
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25

MONEY

Handy tips to prepare for tax season

Paying Your Dues

BY L I SA COXO N
ILLUSTRATION BY IAN PH I LLI PS

EVEN GENIUSES can be confounded by the idiosyncrasies of

personal finance: Albert Einstein
once purportedly claimed that the
hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax. So, if youre
having a hard time trying to make
sense of your T1s and T4s, youre
not aloneespecially if youre fully
or semi-retired. As we age, our
forms of income change, which can
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03 2016

rd.ca

affect our returns. Here, some pointers to help you master your taxes.

Plan Ahead
Year-round organization is key,
says Cleo Hamel, a senior tax specialist in Calgary. You dont know
how much your expenses will be
unless youre keeping track of
them on a monthly or bimonthly
basis. Mark key expenditures on a

calendar, keep a folder to hold your

paperwork and hang on to receipts
for medical items such as prescriptions and dental work. Dont throw
away any of your charity donation
receiptsthey can be claimed
within a five-year period.

Understand Your Income

Over 65 and working part-time? If
you receive old age security (OAS),
you need to be mindful of any supplementary money coming in.
Once a persons income exceeds
approximately $71,000 a year, the
government starts to claw back
some of the [OAS], explains Junaid
Usmani, a chartered accountant in
Mississauga, Ont.

Divide and Conquer

Pension splitting is a great option
for married or common-law senior
couples. It allows the higher-earning
individual to share up to half their
pension income (excluding the Canada Pension Plan) with their lowerearning spouse. The goal is to level
out both partners incomes so one
isnt taxed significantly higher than
the other. Consider consulting an
accountant early in the year to make
sure the spouse who makes less isnt
bumped into a higher tax bracket.

Snowbirds Beware
If you prefer to spend the chillier
months down south, tax returns

can get tricky.

You have to
be compliant
in both countries, warns
Hamel. Heres
an example: if
you own property
in the United States that you live in
for half the year and rent out the
rest of the time, you likely need to
file a U.S. tax return, as well. If you
have residential ties to Canada (i.e.,
you own a home and/or keep bank
accounts in this country), youre
likely still considered a Canadian
resident. Usmani adds that its crucial to identify all of your assets
outside of Canada or you could face
penalties of up to $2,500 a year for
failing to report.

Mind Your Investments

Contributing to investments such as
an RRSP provides a tax break, but
withdrawn money is considered taxable income. By the end of the year
in which you turn 71, you need to
have done one of the following with
your RRSP: withdrawn the funds,
converted them into a RRIF or used
them to purchase an annuity. But
dont wait until the last minute to
do so. When the calendar turns
from 2016 to 2017, if you still havent
done anything with your RRSP, its
considered withdrawn, says Hamel.
And youll be hit with a tax bill.
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03 2016

27

Is Everything OK?

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ember institu
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Find out why
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at cdic.ca

SPECIAL ADVERTISING FEATURE

How Joint Accounts

Help Maximize
Deposit Insurance
If you have a spouse, do you share
a joint account? If you do, there
are many couples in your situation.
Convenience tops the list of reasons why. Each
spouse can deposit money into one fund and
have a single, dedicated account for paying the
mortgage, utilities and other living expenses.
If that were not enough of a reason, heres
another incentive to add a joint account to your
individual bank account: Safeguarding your
money. By opening a joint account, you can
help maximize your deposit insurance coverage should your bank ever fail. While the CDIC
coverage limit is $100,000, you can increase
that amount if you diversify the types of deposits you maintain. Joint deposits, for example,
are protected separately from accounts held
in just one name.

Consider this simple example. Brenda is married

and holds $150,000 in her own savings account.
If her bank failed, her account would qualify
for $100,000 of insurance coverage, while
$50,000 would not be protected by CDIC. Now,
lets say Brenda opened a joint account with
her husband Bill and moved $50,000 over to
this new account. By diversifying accounts, the
couple would then have an additional $50,000
covered by CDIC. So, the entire $150,000 would
be protected in the event of a bank failure.
Bill also holds $150,000 in his bank account,
so collectively, Bill and Brenda have $300,000.
Here, to maximize CDIC coverage, Brenda could
hold $100,000 in her own name, Bill could
hold $100,000 in his own name, and together
they could hold another $100,000 in a joint
account. Doing so would mean all $300,000
would be protected since all three accounts
would qualify separately for up to $100,000
worth of coverage.

For more information,

talk to your financial
advisor or consult
cdic.ca

CULTURE

Eternal optimist Neil Pasricha

finds a formula for positivity
with The Happiness Equation

Sunny
Disposition
Neil Pasricha has made it his mission to proselytize about looking on
the bright side. The Toronto-based author crystallized his philosophy
in 2010s The Book of Awesome, a celebration of the little things that make
life worth living. Hes expanded his upbeat empire since then, putting his
ideology into practice with this new book that strives to teach readers how
to want nothing and have everything. March 8.

This months hottest books, music, movies and TV

SHYLOCK IS MY
NAME

WHATS LEFT
BEHIND

THE COYOTES
BICYCLE

Howard Jacobson

Gail Bowen

Kimball Taylor

In this bold reimagining of The Merchant

of Venice, novelist and
Shakespeare scholar
Jacobson uses the
character of Shylock
presented in contrast
with a modern-day
foilto explore ideas
around Jewish identity. Feb. 9.

For the past 25-plus

years, the Saskatchewan
mystery novelist has
enthralled readers with
the adventures of her
sleuthing heroine,
Joanne Kilbourn. In
Bowens latest Kilbourn
chronicle, a wedding is
the setting for a murder.
March 1.

This lyrical work of investigative journalism

follows 7,000 blackmarket bikes that were
smuggled across the
border between Tijuana
in Mexico and the
United Statesand the
elusive underground
figure who orchestrated
the feat. March 1.

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03 2016

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(LYN N) HA ROLD DA NI ELS; (TH E LITT LE P R INCE) PARAM OUNT PICTURES

BY SA RA H L I SS

YOU AND I

FULL CIRCLE

Jeff Buckley

Loretta Lynn

Buckley died in 1997 at the age of

30, leaving behind a single album
and an outsized legacy. Nearly 20
years later, a trove of unreleased
early recordings has been discovered. These rarities comprise You
and I, a gift for fans new and old.
March 11.

A decade or so ago,
Lynn earned a
Grammy for Van Lear
Rose, her collaboration with rock
maverick Jack White. On her latest,
the country legend returns to her
roots with twangy tunes recorded
in Johnny Cashs old studio. March 4.

THE LITTLE PRINCE

Antoine de Saint-Exuprys beloved character comes to three-dimensional life in this richly

detailed and sweet animated film, featuring the
voice talents of A-listers such as Paul Rudd and
Rachel McAdams. March 18.

WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT

Based on the experiences of

war correspondent Kim Barker, this
dramedy sees comedy queen Tina
Fey getting serious-ish as a journalist
embedded in Afghanistan who balances the chaos of her days with wild
parties at night. March 4.

THE FAMILY

The brainchild of Scandal writer

Jenna Bans, this gripping new series
centres around the town of Red Pines,
Calif., and what happens when the
mayors sonmissing for more than a
decade and presumed deadsuddenly reappears. Premieres March 6.
rd.ca

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31

The

BRAIN,
as the bodys command centre, handles
a host of functions essential to our survival.
But for most of us, the mind remains an
awesome mystery. Here, researchers and patients
shed light on what its like to dig around
in that most remarkable of organs.

INSIDE

OUT
BY DANIELLE GRO EN, RUDY LEE A N D SA R A H LI SS
PHOTOGRAPHY BY MAUDE CHAU VIN

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(ASSI STANT) PHIL BERNA RD; (MA KEUP) AM LI E THOM AS; (TALENT) CARL A CE RRITOS; ( PHOTO AG E NCY) MAD ORE PR OD U CT ION.COM

COVER STORY

READERS DIGEST

Positive experiences
with a stranger are
transferred to members
of the group and
increase their empathy.
Lead researcher
GRIT HEIN

In a 2015 Swiss study, participants saw

electrical shocks delivered to members
of their own social circles, as well as
people from a different group. According to brain scans, when observers
witnessed a stranger suffering pain,
they were less likely to register activation in the area that corresponds
to empathy than when they saw the
same thing happening to someone
they recognized. But when participants believed theyd received help
from that other group (in this case,
they observed that one stranger had
paid to cancel a shock that a member
of their party would otherwise have
received), the empathy gap began to
shrink. Just a few positive experiences
with a member of the other group
were enough to significantly increase
compassionate brain responses.
THE TAKE-AWAY: Even if you feel

indifferent to someone, a few constructive interactions can help boost

feelings of compassion.
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03 2016

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The frontal lobes, located

just behind the forehead,
provide us with the ability to make decisions, pay attention,
use reason, form habits, take charge
of impulses, empathize with others
and move our bodies.

What Its Like to

Lose Your Sight and
Transform Your Brain

A cognitive-neuroscience professor at
the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Rebecca Saxe specializes in
theory of mindessentially, how we
think about others. While studying
what blind people knew about vision,
she and her colleagues made a discovery: parts of the brain designated for
sight, which lie dormant in visually
impaired individuals, could find a
new function in language processing.
In 1994, neuroimaging done on
blind people who were reading
Braille showed that the visual cortex
had not entirely atrophied. Reading

ISTOCKP HOTO

What Its Like to

Learn Compassion

Braille presents a spatial problem,

and thats what vision is. If youre
blind, you have all of this available
cortex thats great at distinguishing spatial relations, and you have a
problem that requires that skill.
Then we scanned blind subjects
as they performed a task involving
sentence comprehension. When you
hear a sentence, theres neural activity that quickly spreads through the
left hemisphere. Our data showed the
visual cortex responding to language.
That was one of the most surprising
findings. The brain responses were
what youd expect from a sighted person looking at a bright image, but they
were generated by a blind person listening to a sentence. It was one of the
most dramatic examples of plasticity
Ive encountered: a brain region taking on a set of completely new functions from whats typically its job.
THE TAKE-AWAY: Says Saxe, When

adults have a stroke or other devastating brain damage, they cant talk
anymore. If we could get other brain
regions to take on some of the missing functions, thats the holy grail
of stroke treatment.
In the rear portion of our
cerebral cortex, the occipital lobes are the hub
for perception, used in visual processing, colour recognition, depth
perception and motion detection.

What Its Like to

Recover From a Serious
Brain Injury

Dr. Norman Doidge is a Torontobased psychiatrist, psychoanalyst

and author whose books focus on
the brains ability to change its own
structure and function. In 2015s The
Brains Way of Healing: Remarkable
Discoveries and Recoveries From the
Frontiers of Neuroplasticity, he discusses the recovery of Gabrielle, who
treated her brain with a novel form of
light therapy.
In D e cemb er 2011, a w oman
named Gabrielle introduced herself
to me at a lecture in Toronto. Shed
had a life-threatening tumour in the
region beside her brain stem. It was
cut out, which saved her life, but
the process left her with disabling
symptoms: she had nausea, balance
problems, trouble swallowing and
difficulty walking. She was chronically exhausted. She had read and
written music all her life, but shed
developed an extraordinary hypersensitivity to sound.
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READERS DIGEST

We know that specific frequencies

of red and infrared light can support
small intracellular structures called
mitochondria, which use that energy
to activate dormant cells.
With her own doctor, Gabrielle
worked to heal her brain, using
therapeutic pads of 100 or so flat
LEDs over the back of her neck. After three weeks, with several weekly
treatments, she could concentrate
and multi-task. I saw her 11 weeks
later, at a Beethoven concert, listening to thundering musicbefore,
she could barely tolerate Muzak in
an elevator. I saw her walk across
the room assertively, and I knew she
was on the mend.
Shes still not 100 per cent: Gabrielle did have a part of her brain cut
out. But she got her life back. Before,
she did maybe a one-hour activity
and then shed have to stay in bed for
several days. Now, shes rejoined her
choir. She can dance.
THE TAKE-AWAY: Says Gabrielle,
For people with brain injuries,
theres hope. Youre not stuck with
getting used to a new normalyou
can get your old normal back, too.
Found at the base of the
skull, the little brain
(thats what cerebellum
means in Latin) is responsible for
our coordination, balance, equilibrium and muscular activity.

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What Its Like to

Be an Insomniac

Canadian writer R.M. Vaughan is

a lifelong insomnia sufferer and the
author of Bright Eyed: Insomnia and
Its Cultures. In his quest to fully understand his condition, he found some
interesting strategies for learning to
embrace it.
Ive been an insomniac since I was
about 10. It manifests as an absolute inability of my brain to shut off.
I also have a disorder called restless
leg syndrome. Still, every evening, I
am an optimist, that guy who thinks,
Tonight will be the time where I just
conk out. It never happens.
Yesterday, for instance, I drifted
off to a point where I was nearly
asleep. Then it was as though someone snuck into my room with a big
needle full of adrenalin and jabbed
me with it. Even though my brain
was only half awake, I was kicking,
my muscles constricting and releasing. I thrashed about for a few hours,
then my body eventually exhausted
itself and I got about an hour and a
half of sleep. Then I woke up again,
and the cycle continued for the rest
of the night. Thats typical.
I spoke to a doctor in Iceland
who claims people there dont suffer from seasonal affective disorder.
Their country is plunged into darkness for a good part of the year. But
he wasnt talking about medication.

He wasnt talking about behavioural

therapies. He was talking about collective action built up over centuries
of people living under these conditions and thriving. This is a culture
that has developed a whole language
around the darkness of winter
they use words like cozy instead of
words like bleak. And its a culture
that prioritizes communities and
families. During the darkest times of
the year, no ones ever alone. Its not
necessarily a party; youre just not
alone. Insomniacs carry a rage about
why we are so apart from the world,
but I think Iceland gives us a new
way to look at chronic conditions so
people who have neurological disorders dont feel so alone.
THE TAKE-AWAY: Says Vaughan,
who is based in both Toronto and
Berlin, If you live in a city where
people dont go out for dinner
until 10 p.m., insomnia can seem
like a sort of strange benefitand
one that can help you acclimatize.
Finding a context in which your setback becomes a strength can help
you copeor even thrive.
Shaped a bit like a dandelion, the brain stem
links up the spinal cord
with our cerebrum. It is responsible
for nervous system functions such
as breathing, swallowing, perspiration, arousal, sleep and reflexes.

What Its Like to

Build Strong Memories

In a 2015 study, psychologists from

New York University asked participants to identify images from two
categories, animals or tools. After a
delay, they were presented with new
animals and toolsonly this time,
they received a shock after viewing pictures from one category, designed to make those images more
memorable. The researchers anticipated that, when participants recall
was later tested, theyd remember
the category of images paired with
the shock (say, the tools) better than
the one without it. The surprise was
this: their recall was also strengthened for the pictures of tools they had
seen before any of the shocks were
delivered, suggesting that our brains
are able to update previous memories with essential new information.
Says lead researcher Joseph Dunsmoor, We knew from past research
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37

READERS DIGEST

that emotional events are better

remembered than trivial or boring
ones, but what we didnt know was
that emotion appears to reach back
in time to improve the chances that
well recall trivial things.

psychologist Melanie Noel, is using an

innovative approach to help patients
like Katya Dittrich deal with severe
chronic pain. In their intensive sixweek program, the brain holds the key
to living a functional life.

THE TAKE-AWAY: Emotional experi-

Nivez Rasic: We see young patients

who not only have severe pain but
disability from their paintheyre
having trouble functioning. They get
daily physiotherapy to try to improve
their function, daily psychological
counselling and group sessions that
address different aspects associated
with painanxiety, sleep, fear. It runs
seven hours a day, five days a week.
Some of these patients have had
pain for such a long time that they
have an altered perception of what
it is. Their brains have to get used to
the fact that when they do exercise
whether thats riding a bike, walking
on a treadmill, playing soccerwhat
theyre feeling is normal sensations
associated with exercise, not pain.

ences can even strengthen memories

that initially seemed unimportant.
Perched on either side of
the head, beneath the
temples, the temporal
lobes are responsible for organizing
and processing what we see and
hear. Theyre also involved in learning, memory formation, language
acquisition and emotional responses.

What Its Like to

Use Your Mind to
Combat Chronic Pain

At the Alberta Childrens Hospital,

a team of experts, including clinician Dr. Nivez Rasic and clinical
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Melanie Noel: We can tell patients

are better when theyre able to go
to school or hang out with friends,
and now we have fascinating neural
imaging data that parallels that. It
shows were actually affecting the
way areas in the brain are talking to
each other. Our treatments are able
to alter the connections in the brain.
As pain becomes chronic, some
patients may become conditioned to

Just teaching people

to think about pain
differently can alter not
only the level of pain
theyre reporting but
the brain itself.
Clinical psychologist
MELANIE NOEL

avoid doing things they did before.

For kids, and for adults, too, theres
often a sense of fear: I dont want to
walk down the street because it hurts,
and thats scary. Were changing that
through our treatments on a neurological level. Just teaching people to
think about pain differently can alter not only the level of pain theyre
reporting but the brain itself.
Katya Dittrich, age 14, patient
From age nine, Dittrich suffered from
knee pain that grew worse over time.
By the time she turned 11, the young
biathlete could barely walk and
needed morphine to sleep at night. A
rheumatologist referred her to the program, which she started in May 2013.
You know that feeling when your foot
falls asleep and you have to shake it
to wake it up? Its like that, all over my
body. And if I stubbed my toe when
my nerve pain was active, itd be 10
times worse than normal.

The program had a lot of pain

psychology. We had quote books where
we wrote down things to help us reframe
what we were feeling. One that still
works for me is: You are enough. You
are so enough. Its unbelievable how
enough you are. Even just knowing I
wasnt alone, that it wasnt something
Id made up in my head, that helped.
The point of the program was to
give me tools and knowledge so I can
handle my pain. In December 2015, I
did my first race with little to no nerve
pain. I came in dead last, but I felt like
Id won the World Cup. People have
different strategiesI listen to music
before a run, I get my brain stuck on a
song, and I use that to distract myself.
Before I went into the program, my
pain level would be 10 out of 10. Now
its around a three, on average.
THE TAKE-AWAY: Says Noel, We often think of pain as a physical thing
we cant control, but the way we think
and feel about it can change our
experience. And the earlier we intervene, the more likely it is that we can
prevent chronic pain from being a
problem in adulthood.
Located near the top of
the brain, just above the
occipital lobes and behind the frontal lobes, the parietal
lobes control cognition, processing
information, pain, spatial orientation, speech and facial recognition.

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39

Jonathan and his

mom, Tina Boileau,
are advocates for
Butterfly Children,
who suffer from
epidermolysis
bullosa.

INSPIRATION

Living with a rare skin condition

makes every actionfrom eating to
sleepingan agony for Jonathan Pitre.
Sharing his story to help others has
turned out to be the easiest thing of all.

The

Butterfly
Effect
BY DAVE CA MER ON

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READERS DIGEST

IN A STARK WHITE EXAMINATION ROOM at Torontos Hospital for

Sick Children (SickKids), a medical team has gathered for a new
experimental skin-care procedure. A dermatologist, three residents
and a nurse throng Dr. Elena Pope as she applies a translucent
membrane to her patients raw flesh. The nurse snaps some photos.

Does it hurt? asks Pope, the institutions head of pediatric dermatology.

Just when you touch, answers
15-year-old Jonathan Pitre before
exhaling audibly. Standing at his side
with arms crossed, his mom, Tina
Boileau, never averts her gaze from
her child.
Jonathan is one of about 3,500
Canadians living with epidermolysis
bullosa (EB), a genetic condition in
which the two layers of skinthe
epidermis and dermisfail to anchor
together because they lack one of
several key proteins. EB sufferers are
nicknamed Butterfly Children, since
their skin is as fragile as that creatures
wingsthe slightest friction can
cause a painful abrasion that wont
heal properly, if at all. Jonathan has
the most severe form of the condition;
60 to 70 per cent of his bodys surface
is chronic wounds, which can lead
to a host of fatal complications. The
average life expectancy of someone
with his subtype of EB is 25.
On this December morning in 2015,
the teen is bound in gauze from neck
to waist, and from the thighs down.
His exposed skin is a patchwork of
red and purple sores. Over the three
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worst lesions, Pope carefully places

strips containing amnion, an antiinflammatory placental membrane
that provides growth factors to
promote healing. The hope is that the
amnion will help repair Jonathans
skin and reduce his discomfort; if it
works, additional applications can be
used to close more of his wounds. The
problem is, to test these treatments,
Jonathan must submit to the thing
that hurts the most: contact.
As Pope continues the treatment,
Jonathan whimpers and looks over
his shoulder at the group. A bead of
sweat clings to his cheek. The doctor
asks if he wants a moment.
You have to do it, so do it, he says.
Above his head hangs a painting of
a boy on a unicycle juggling apples.
He glances up at it as though seeking
advice on how to defy probability.
FOR PEOPLE WITH EB, lesions can
occur inside as well as outside the
body. When Jonathan was born,
blistering in his airway impeded his
breathing, and doctors were forced
to intubate. He spent the next month
and a half in the neonatal intensive
care unit at the Childrens Hospital of

PHOTOGRA PHY BY JULI E OLI VER/OTTAWA CI T IZEN

He looks delicate, says Tina of her son, but he has the heart of a lion.

Eastern Ontario. He was diagnosed

with a recessive dystrophic form of
the disease, which means both his
parents carry the gene. It also means
his condition will deteriorate. In the
coming years, his compromised body
will be at increasing risk of cardiac
problems, organ failure and skin
cancer. With EB, every child is
different, says Pope. He may beat the
odds. Its hard to predict.
Jonathan weighs 72 pounds
about half the average of a boy his
ageand that includes the gains
hes made since a gastrostomy
tube was inserted last November,

which allows him to receive the

nutrients he wasnt getting orally
(eating inflames sores on his gums
and in his throat). Chronic scarring has reduced his appendages to
stubs, and the buildup of scar tissue
has fused his digits and made them
appear webbeda condition called
syndactyly. Hes already had three
surgeries to separate the contracting fingers from one another. Over
the past two years, his compromised
mobility has led to osteoporosis, and
while he can walk down the hallway
at home, he depends on a wheelchair to carry him greater distances.
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READERS DIGEST

Ironically, as the disease has

become more physically debilitating for Jonathan, it has also been
a source of empowermentfor
himself and others. In 2012, Pope
invited the then-12-year-old to
participate in a panel at the
Dystrophic Epidermolysis Bullosa
Research Association (DEBRA)
International Congress, held in
Toronto. With typical candour, Jonathan talked about his condition
before an audience of nearly 150
that included EB patients and researchers from around the world.
It was life-changing, Jonathan
says of the experience. It was the
first time Id ever met someone else
with EB. It made me feel like I wasnt
alone anymore.
Moreover, he realized the effect
of his public speaking: Sharing my
story made me feel like I was making
a difference. It made me redouble
my efforts.
Since the congress panel, those
efforts have included becoming an
ambassador for DEBRA Canada. The
organization, of which Tina serves
as president, has adopted the
slogan, The worst disease youve
never heard of. The group is trying
to change that.
In October 2014, the Ottawa
Citizenbased 30 minutes from
Jonathans hometown of Russell,
Ont.ran a profile of the teen. Within
a matter of days, the story was picked
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up by other North American outlets

and generated more than $100,000
in donations to DEBRA, giving him
faith that telling his story might
indeed produce results.
BACK AT THEIR TWO-STOREY home
in Russell, Jonathan stands hunched
on a rug in his mothers room. Tina
sits cross-legged at his feet cutting a
strip from a roll of silicone. Jonathan
has an angry-looking oval wound on
his calf, as though hes been bitten
by a lamprey eel, and when Tina applies the silicone, he gasps sharply.
Changing Jonathans dressings is
an exhausting three- to four-hour
process that takes place three
evenings a week.
Ow, he says. Ow, ow, ow. The
string of ows turns into an extended,
keening howl. Jonathans Boston terrier, Gibson, whines from the other
side of the closed door.
Sorry, buddy, says Tina. As Jonathans moan peters out, she prepares
the gauze and stretch bandage that
will secure the silicone to his leg.
Jonathan turns his attention to
sports highlights on the TV. The
Ottawa Senators fan has an eye on
becoming a sports broadcaster, a
career that would suit his confident,
unembellished manner. He scoffs at
a soccer clip.
Theyre babies, he says. Always
throwing themselves on the ground,
even when theyre just touched.

A glistening sore larger than a

Tina asks her son to turn so she
can study his backside. Then she re- dinner plate covers most of his back,
moves a needle from its antiseptic and Tina begins to tackle it. With her
sleeve and pops a blister behind his brothers next howl, Nomy sits up
right knee. Jonathan shudders. She and crosses her legs. Jonathans body
cant always know if an area of skin is flexed, the tendons in his neck
will be particularly sensitive, and strained like guy wires. Every beat of
its a challenge to be gentle enough. his heart ripples the thin white skin
Sometimes when Jonathan lets out a over his ribs.
gasp, his mother takes a corresponding deep breath. Then, as he weeps, IN THE ABSENCE OF effective thershe busies herself with scissors and apy or a cure for EB, caring for Jonasilicone, getting a few
than requires constant
more strips cut to size.
vigilance. Avoiding
Im hurting him,
p o t e nt i a l p i t f a l l s
Thats what
Tina says of the dressthings as mundane as
moms do: we
ings ritual. Its not
zippers and oral hyquality time.
gieneis perennially
help our kids
But its family time
important. A zippered
through the
nevertheless. At one
sweater might be easipoint, Nomy, Jonaer for the teen to get
bad and the
t h a n s 1 3 - y e a r- o l d
in and out of, but the
sister, comes in and good, says Tina. metal can rip his flesh.
stretches out on the
Brushing his teeth
bed. The curly-haired
safely is a challenge,
girl pushes up her glasses and opens but not brushing leads to infection.
a trivia game on her iPhone.
In Jonathans world, staying healthy
Whose laws deal with gravity and means risking further agony.
motion? she asks.
EB sufferers experience contact
Newton, Jonathan answers.
with their skin as stinging pinpricks.
Howd you know that?
The pain, says Jonathan, is basicNow wrapped to the waist, Jona- ally indescribable. To mitigate his
than rests on a stool and scrolls suffering, the teen takes analgesics,
through photos of Gibson on his including methadone, but theyre
iPhone. Balanced in his lap is a plush often inadequate. His doctors are
wolf named Aurora. As much as its struggling to come up with the
childish, I do what I have to do, he right combination of medication to
says. EB kids like soft things.
provide as much relief as possible.
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READERS DIGEST

SUPPORT THE CAUSE

On Facebook (facebook.com/
ButterflyChildJonathanPitre), Jonathan
Pitre shares updates with an online
community of more than 2,000.
DEBRA Canadas website
(debracanada.org) has additional
information about EB, as well as a
secure donation portal. Funds raised
support awareness campaigns, as well
as EB patients and their families.
The first annual Jonathan Pitre Golf
Classic (classiquejonathanpitre.com)
will be held on July 22, 2016, at Falcon
Ridge Golf Club in Ottawa.

Where modern medicine falls short,

Jonathans imaginationhis secret
weaponcomes into play.
I slow my breathing and try to
meditate, he says. I imagine a flame,
and I throw the pain into the flame.
Until 2014, the painkillers and
mental exercises enabled Jonathan
to regularly go to school in the neighbouring town of Embrun. These days,
he misses class when hes too tired
from his bathing routine the previous
evening; his attendance is also interrupted by trips to SickKids in Toronto.
With the help of school staff and his
teaching aide, he keeps up with his
studies from home but still worries
about falling behind his peers.
Jonathan was able to participate
in gymhis favourite classuntil
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four years ago. His earliest friends

knew to be gentle with him, but not
everyone followed suit. Between
Grade 5, when he switched to a
new schoolleaving behind his
close palsand high school, there
was bullying and name-calling.
My wounds smell, Jonathan says
with a shrug. Of course, they do
theyre wounds.
Th e ha ra ss m e nt ha s l a rg e l y
ended now that his classmates have
adolescent preoccupations, but it still
affects him. I was shocked by the
bullying when I was little, he says.
Now Im mostly sad that I dont have
friends anymore.
W h i l e J o n a t h a n s f r e q u e n t
seclusion at home allows him fewer
opportunities to socialize in person,
his online network continues to grow,
thanks to his role at DEBRA. And
even as he admits to his outsider
status, he maintains his favourite
people in the world are Nomy and
Tina. Theres being a mother and
caring for a child, and then theres
Mom, he says. I wouldnt be able to
go on without her.
My life has been dedicated to
making sure hes got the best I can
possibly give him, says Tina. His
health has gotten progressively worse
over the years. I plan to keep doing
what weve been doing and taking
every challenge straight-on. Thats
what moms do: we help our kids
through the bad and the good.

WERE AT THE BABY stages of

exciting research, says Pope of the

work being done in the field of EB.
Among the therapies showing promise are stem-cell injections, which involve introducing bone marrow cells
into the blood, and gene therapy,
where the patients own genetically
corrected skin cells are grafted onto
his or her wounds. Clinical trials are
under way, and Jonathan is committed to doing his part to find medical
solutionseven though a breakthrough might come too late for him.
In the busy waiting area at SickKids the morning of the amnion
treatment, a toddler is splayed
across two seats, playing with a
plastic truck and burbling out engine sounds. This is the same lounge
where Jonathan waited for a graft
treatment last August, when his
back was scrubbed of non-viable
tissue, followed by the application
of cadaverous skin to shrink the
wound. On that occasion, Jonathan

was ashen-faced and withdrawn.

Pope thought he looked scared
just like any kid undergoing a major
procedure. Still, she considers him
exceedingly resilient, particularly in
his choice to become an advocate
for awareness rather than giving in
to self-pity. Jonathans subtype of
EB is the most devastating medical
condition we have, says Pope. It
affects the whole body and causes
such a significant amount of pain
and theres no cure.
Jonathan eyes the toddlers truck
as it crashes to the floor. When asked
if hes afraid of dying, the teen is quiet
for several seconds. Hes searching
for the right words.
I want to have a regular life and
to grow up to be an adult, he says.
A few more beats: Yes, Im scared.
The admission seems to hearten
him. Its supernormal to think
about whats ahead. But Im still
here. Thats the way I think of it. Im
still here.

ART WORKS
Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes.
Art is knowing which ones to keep.
SCOTT ADAMS, cartoonist

If wed known we were going to be the Beatles,

wed have tried harder.
GEORGE HARRISON

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47

HUMOUR

DOG
How our pets comfort trumps a good nights sleep

BED HOG
BY BILL BARO L FR O M FAST CO MPA N Y
ILLUSTRATION BY DREW SHAN NON

ONE NIGHT IN 1998, my wife and I

fell asleep with our six-month-old
Labrador puppy, Mojo, on the bed
between us. When we woke up the
next morning and discovered there
hadnt been any disastrous consequences, a thought balloon bloomed
over our heads: dog snoozes on bed,
snuggles with humans; kind of nice.
The reason I remember this: it was
the last good nights sleep I ever got.
There are no hard numbers on
how many people bed share with
their pets, but two studies presented
at 2014s annual meeting of the
Associated Professional Sleep Societies confirmed what any animal-loving
idiot like myself can tell you: there are
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a lot of us, and we are walking around

like zombies. In one survey of 298
patients at a family-practice clinic,
about half reported sleeping with pets
(more dogs than cats). Within that
group, 63 per cent of respondents who
shared a bed with a pet more than four
nights a week had poor sleep quality.
Im no sleep scientist, but these
figures seem low. Then again, Im
usually pretty foggy. At my annual
physical, my doctor asked how I
was sleeping. Not well, I told him.
I suspected the dogs were to blame.
You have your dogs in the bed
with you and your wife?
Yes, I told him.
What kind of dogs?

READERS DIGEST

Labradors, I said, hearing how

ridiculous it sounded.
He blinked and asked incredulously, Labradors? Plural?
Yes, I said in a meek voice.
Thats right. My wife, Jennifer,
and I share our king-size bed with
11-year-old, 27-kilogram Roxy and
five-year-old, 25-kilogram Scout.
(Mojo went to her reward several
years ago. She was well rested.) Roxy
and Scout are small as Labs go, but
their lust for a good nights sleep is
outsize. They dont mind colonizing
a disproportionately large swath of
our mattress to get it. If you were to
watch a time-lapse video of a night
in our bedroom, you would see Roxy
and Scout sprawled peacefully across
the vast middle of our enormous bed,
the area that would correspond to
the Midwest on a map of the United
States, while Jennifer clings precariously to the Atlantic seaboard and I try
to avoid plummeting into the Pacific.
I KNOW OUR arrangement is bad for
me. The Division of Sleep Medicine at
Harvard Medical School in Boston reports cheerily that a lack of adequate
sleep can affect judgment, mood and
the ability to learn and retain information, and may increase the risk of serious accidents and injury. In the long
term, chronic sleep deprivation may
lead to a host of health problems, in-

cluding obesity, diabetes, cardiovascular disease and even early mortality.

Yet, night after night, my wife and
Itwo adults who train our dogs
rigorously, insist on their good citizenship and are otherwise firmly
unsentimental about our status as
pack leadersdecline to kick the
canines out of our bed, and we wake
up grouchy and stiff. As do many of
the friends and acquaintances I informally polled for this story. One, who
sleeps with an 11-kilogram wheaten
terrier, likens the experience to trying
to share a bed with a piano bench.
Another was at least willing to do
something about it. One recent night,
when her two-year-old Great Dane
jumped on the bed at 2 a.m., she says,
I put up with it for about an hour.
Then I moved to the couch.
Dont misunderstand. I dont discount the satisfaction of curling up
next to a slumbering dogor, I guess,
cat. Its hard to ignore the elemental
comfort of Roxys muffled snores or
the whispery exhalation of Scouts
breath. The sounds say the day is done
and the pack is together and safe.
Even if tonight, at about 3 a.m.,
when Im feeling less broad-minded, I
give Scout a vicious shove that doesnt
wake her upeven then, I will sleepily
but deliberately act against my own
physiological best interests and allow
her to stay right where she is.

FAST COMPANY (FEBRUARY 25, 2015), COPYRIGHT 2015 BY MANSUETO VENTURES, LLC, FASTCOMPANY.COM

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Laughter
THE BEST MEDICINE

BOOK REVIEW

[Sees girl reading The Catcher

in the Rye]
Ah, I love that book. The way he
just [clenches fist] catches all that
frickin rye.
@DAVID8HUGHES

THE BEST JOKE

I EVER TOLD
BY D.J. DEMERS
People always tell me,
Everything happens for
a reason. But they can
never name the reason,
so basically theyre
just telling me, Everything happens.

A REAL GROANER

Demers performs
stand-up across
North America.
Find out if he is
performing in
your city at
djdemers.com.

LACE IS MORE

Did you hear the one about the kid

who started a business tying shoelaces on the playground? It was a
knot-for-profit.

JOSEP H F UDA

ANDREW FERGUSON, S a u l t S t e . Ma r i e , O n t .

EPILOGUE
Q: What did E.T.s mother say to him

when he got home?

A: WHERE ON EARTH HAVE
YOU BEEN?

reddit.com

One night, a guy walks into a bar.

Hes ordering some drinks when
he notices there are two large
pieces of meat stuck to the ceiling,
and he asks the barman why theyre
there. The barman says, Its
part of a little game. Youve got
to try to get those down from the
ceiling without using a chair or a
pool cue or anything else. If you
manage, Ill give you $200. But
if you dont succeed, youve got
to give me $200.
The guy eyes the ceiling for a while,
then turns to the barman and says,
No, Im not going to try it.
The barman asks, Why not?
I cant do it, the man says,
shaking his head. The steaks
are too high.
reddit.com
Send us your original jokes! You could
earn $50 and be featured in the magazine.
See page 8 or rd.ca/joke for details.
rd.ca

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51

When a toddler disappears in an icy creek,

finding the unconscious boy is only the
first step in the fight for his life

Dead
for

One

Hourand

41 Minutes
BY D E RE K BURNETT

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DRAMA IN REAL LIFE

Gardell Martin, age

two, beside his home
in Mifflinburg, Pa.

READERS DIGEST

ITS MARCH 11, 2015, and sun pours over the ridge that borders

Doyle and Rose Martins rural property outside Mifflinburg, Pa.

Yesterday it rained all day, melting the better part of the long
winters snow, and what the rain left behind, the sun is taking care
of today. Water runs down the surrounding slopes, swelling the
normally humble creeks until they nearly jump their banks. The
stream that cuts through the Martins yard is usually ankle deep
and sluggish, but today it courses angrily beneath the footbridge at
startling speed, up to an adults waist and frigid.

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but everybody is thinking about that

raging creek. Rose dials 9-1-1, and
the girls call their father. The property echoes with frantic shouts, as
mother and children scramble along
the banks of the stream, concerned
about the speed of the icy grey water.
RANDALL BEACHEL IS STANDING at
his kitchen sink when he looks out
the window and sees Grace and Gary
running alongside the stream where
it exits the Martin property. Something isnt right. Grace is barefoot,
no jacket. Theyre yelling. He steps
outside. Whats wrong? he calls
to Gary.
We cant find my little brother!
Randalls heart sinks. He runs back
inside, tells his wife, Melissa, whats
going on, and pulls on his shoes.
Together they rush outside, hop
into their truck and drive down
the road to where the creek crosses
through pasture land some 200 metres downstream of the Martins

PHOTOGRA PHY BY DUSTIN COHEN

The Martin boys will not squander

such a lovely afternoon. After Rose
brought them home from school,
they hurried outside to ride bikes
and gather sticks to build a fire. They
are independent kids; the Martins
have seven under the age of 17, with
another on the way. In keeping with
their own upbringings, Doyle and
Rose expect their children to learn
self-reliance and responsibility, the
older ones looking after the younger.
Today, Gary, 11, and Greg, seven, are
playing with little Gardell, who is not
yet two. Doyle, a trucker, is out on the
road. Rose is working in the kitchen,
where she can keep an eye on the
boys through the window.
Suddenly Greg bursts through the
door, his face streaked with tears. I
cant find Gardell! he screams. He
was just with me!
Rose and her two oldest, Gloria
and Grace, charge outside, hollering
Gardells name. Just to make sure,
they check the two outbuildings,

place. They exit the vehicle and pass

through two fences. Randall holds
the strands of electric wire, ignoring the shocks, as Melissa climbs to
the other side. When they reach the
waters edge, Melissa goes downstream and Randall begins following
the brook back toward the Martins,
scanning the waters surface. After
a moment, he spots a tiny pair of
navy-blue boots sticking out from
the underbrush. A step or two further, and he sees the whole picture:
the little boy, still clad in a hooded
snowsuit, seemingly suspended on
his side in the middle of that rushing stream, his face turned away
from the current.
Randall plunges into the creek,
gasping involuntarilythe water
temperature is around 0 Closes
his footing and stumbles into a deep
hole. He recovers, then pulls the limp
little body off what turns out to be a
grassy underwater knoll. He staggers
back to dry land, hollering, I found
him! as he flips Gardell over to see if
he can drain the water from the boys
mouth and lungs. An ambulance is
coming up the road. Randall raises
an arm to hail it.
When a paramedic races across
the field, Randall hands the little
boy off and watches as the rescuer
rushes back toward the ambulance,
performing chest compressions as
he goes. By the time Randall reaches
the road, the medics have torn off

Gardells clothes. One of them has

placed a mask onto the little boys
face and is hand-pumping air into
his lungs; the other is rhythmically
pressing the tiny chest to force blood
through the body. Thats all Randall
sees before the vehicle turns and
speeds toward town.
Rose never gets so much as a
glimpse of her son. She learns that
hes being taken to Evangelical Community Hospital in nearby Lewisburg. Moments later, her sister and
brother-in-law arrive at the house,
and together they race toward the
hospital. As they rush into the emergency room 15 minutes later, Rose
is told theyre transporting Gardell
by Life Flight to a trauma centre.
Through the windows of the waiting
area, she can see the chopper on
the heliport, its interior illuminated,
medical workers hunched over what
must be her boys body. Her brotherin-law is an EMT, and he can tell
that theyre still doing CPRafter
all this time!but he says nothing
to Rose.
Michael Lesher, the paramedic who
carried Gardell to the ambulance,
heads back to the station. The CPR has
gone on for more than an hour; typically rescuers give up after less than
half that time. If he survives, Lesher
says to himself, it will be a miracle.
A moment later, the aircraft lifts off.
Rose watches through the window,
tears stinging her eyes.
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READERS DIGEST

DR. FRANK MAFFEI IS preparing for

his evening rounds in the pediatric
intensive care unit at Geisinger Medical Centers Janet Weis Childrens
Hospital in Danville, 27 kilometres
from Lewisburg. He gets a call from
the ER downstairs: a toddler is on his
way via Life Flight, full cardiac arrest.
Worse: CPR has been ongoing for
more than an hour, to no avail.
Still, Maffei and his colleagues are
ready. Upon Gardells arrival, four
residents line up on his left side to
continue CPR: each does two minutes of chest compressions, then
moves to the back of the linea
strategy that preserves energy. Its
critical to get Gardell warmed up,
so even as his limp little body jiggles

I never felt hopeless, says Maffei. I

thought, Weve got a shot to save him.
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and jolts under the force of the chest

compressions, other doctors and
nurses carefully insert an IV and two
catheters to send warm fluids into
his body, which is at only 25 C.
A resident turns to Maffei. At what
point are we going to stop?
Well stop if we warm him to
32 C and hes still unresponsive,
Maffei says.
What about a pH?
The resident is referring to the
acidity of the blood, which spikes
when a person stops breathing and
a heart stops pumping; a pH lower
than 6.8 is usually considered incompatible with life.
Maffei hears himself answer, 6.5.
Its an ambitious call. A few minutes
later, the pH comes back at 6.504. No
heartbeat, no breathing and a low
pH: the boy is dead.
Objectively, Maffei knows that its
all over. Hes been a physician for
25 years. Yet he cant shake some
strange notion that Gardell is still in
there. Keep going, he says.
Its now after 8 p.m., and the toddler remains unresponsive. The
doctors move him to the operating
room and prepare to put him on a
heart bypass machine. Theyve got
his temperature up to 28.6 C, but the
machine will allow them to warm
his blood externally and recirculate
it, speeding the process. A surgeon
stands scrubbed and ready to cut into
the little boys chest.

Lets just do one more pulse

check, Maffei says, laying his fingertips against Gardells femoral
artery. To his amazement, there is a
pulse. His colleague Dr. Rich Lambert
checks the brachial arterythere is a
weak but strengthening pulse there.
Excited, they stand in the OR, monitoring Gardells cardiac activity for
more than an hour, then transfer him
to pediatric intensive care.
Maffei steps out into the waiting
area to meet Rose. Gardells alive,
he says. However, we have to understand that hes alive after essentially
being dead for an hour and 41 minutes. He needs to manage her expectations: Gardells oxygen-starved
brain could be forever damaged, but
its too early to tell. They have to see
if hell wake upand what function
hell have when he does. The following days are critical.
IN THE EARLY HOURS of March 12,
Doyle reaches the hospital. He and
Rose are sitting over their sons bed.
Gardell, Doyle says as he always
does when he returns home, I came
back from trucking to play with you.
Do you want to play?
And to the astonishment of all,
the boy opens his eyes and turns his
head toward his fatherthe boy who,
a few hours before, was dead.
Gardell stays in the hospital two
more days, under light sedation.
Hes kept at a cool 32 C to prevent

SAVING GRACE
So how did a boy who, by every
measure, was dead for nearly two
hours come back to life unscathed?
The key to Gardells survival was the
icy water. Hypothermia imparts a
degree of protection from the detrimental effects of low blood flow and
low oxygen, Dr. Frank Maffei says.
The severe cold stopped Gardells
heart, but it also saved his brain, just
as you might put an amputated
finger on ice until you can reattach it.
At a higher temperature, the boys
brain cells would surely have died
for lack of oxygen; in this case, they
were able to survive unharmed in
suspended animationat least for
an hour and 41 minutes. No one
involved in the rescue has ever seen
such an extreme case.

his brain tissue from swelling. He

begins opening his eyes more frequently, obviously aware of his surroundings. The breathing tube is
removed. Hes weaned off the sedation. On the fourth day, a Sunday, he
returns home. Within a week of the
incident, hes playing with his siblings. You would never know anything happened, Rose says.
Randall sometimes looks over at
the Martin place and chuckles at the
sight of the towheaded youngster
kicking dirt around in the garden or
chasing his brothers. Its truly a miracle, he says. Truly a miracle.
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A male bear, such as this

one on Hudson Bay, can
weigh over 500 kilograms.

ENVIRONMENT

P HOTOGRAP HY BY M I KE M ACRI /M ACRI P HOTO.CA

Disappearing sea ice in the Canadian North

is shrinking polar bear numbers and swelling
killer whale ranks. In the era of climate change,
can the Arctic sustain both?

Predator
vs..
Predator
BY S H ARO N O OSTH OEK

FR O M C ANADI AN GE O GRA PH IC

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READERS DIGEST

lone polar bear ambles along the western shore of

Hudson Bay, just outside the town of Churchill, Man.
Every few minutes, she stops on the rocky beach,
stands on her rear legs and peers across the bays open
waters. Something out there has caught her attention.

Its late August 2011. Months will

pass before the increasingly unpredictable sea ice forms, providing a
platform from which to hunt seals
and fatten up after several lean
months on land. Its not ice, however
longingly anticipated, that has the
bear scanning the cold, grey water.
About 300 metres from shore, seven
triangular dorsal fins betray the
position of a group of unusual visitors to the bay: killer whales. Perhaps
the polar bear is just as surprised to
see the whales as the tourists, whose
Zodiac idles about six metres from
the pod. The boats drivera lifelong
Churchill residentis astonished.
Oh, man, I cant believe Im looking at orcas! Remi Foubert-Allen
shouts over the noise of an outboard
motor. Look at the males dorsal
fin. It must be seven feet! He knows
something most people dont: until
recently, killer whales have been a
rare sight in Hudson Bay.
Jobie Attitaq, an Inuit hunter in
Arctic Bay, Nunavut, has observed
the same thing on the northwest
coast of Baffin Island, 1,600 kilometres
from Churchill. In the late 1990s, we
started to notice killer whales were
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coming around to Admiralty Inlet and

even into Adam Sound and right here
into Arctic Bay, says Attitaq, chair of
the hamlets Hunters and Trappers
Organization. We never experienced
this before. Now we get them often.
In fact, killer whale sightings in
Hudson Bay and the wider eastern Canadian Arctic have increased
since the year 2000, leading scientists
to consider the rise of a new apex
predator in the North. They say disappearing sea ice is opening up new
hunting grounds for killer whales.
At the same time, the vanishing
mass is narrowing habitat for the
Norths long-reigning monarch: the
polar bear.
FIVE YEARS LATER, Steve Ferguson,
a biologist with Fisheries and Oceans
Canada, is among those trying to figure out exactly why the whales are
there and what their presence means
for the Arctic ecosystem. He believes
the creatures are moving north as
climate change opens up previously
inaccessible hunting areas that are
rich in belugas, bowheads, narwhals
and seals. Fergusons research indicates that sea ice in Hudson Strait

was once a choke point, preventing

orcas from accessing Hudson Bay.
Killer whales generally avoid ice
because they can injure their tall dorsal
fins as they swim underneath. But, beginning consistently in the 1960s, declines in the area covered by summer
sea ice in the straits have likely allowed
for killer whales from the northwest
Atlantic to find their way into the bay.
Figures from the Canadian Ice Service
support that conclusion. Between 1968
and 2010, summer sea ice concentrations in Hudson Bay and in Hudson
and Davis Straits have declined by 10
to 20 per cent a decade. In Hudson
Bay alone, that accounts for a loss of
over 16,000 square kilometres. In Baffin Bay, where ice has dropped by 10
per cent a decade, the total reduction
exceeds 18,000 square kilometres
more than three times the size of
Prince Edward Island.
Working with Ferguson, Winnipegbased wildlife biologist Jeff Higdon
has pored over old whaling logs and
interviewed Inuit hunters to create a
database of orca sightings in the region. European and American whalers kept detailed accounts of their
activities; theres no mention of these
awesome predators in Hudson Bay
until well into the 20th century. The
first record I know of for the area was
in the 1940s, says Higdon.
But sightings picked up starting
in the late 60s, with seven reported
that decade. The numbers ticked up

in subsequent decades, then soared

to 84 in the aughts. From 2010 to
2014, there were 24 sightings. Scientists with Fisheries and Oceans
started paying closer attention in
2005, which probably boosted recent
numbers, but a trend is clear.

POLAR BEAR
NUMBERS WILL
DROP WHETHER
GREENHOUSE GAS
EMISSIONS ARE
REDUCED OR NOT.
A similar pattern is evident in the
wider eastern Canadian Arctic. Killer
whales have been summertime visitors
to Baffin Bay and Davis Strait since at
least the late 1800s, but Inuit hunters
say they now see them more regularly
and in larger numbers. This region
has gone from 25 reported sightings
in the 1960s to 79 in the decade from
2000 to 2009. From 2010 to 2014,
there were 62. The fact that orcas are
coming back year after year, and in
greater numbers, tells Ferguson the
hunting must be good. They are
doing well and reproducing, he
says, adding that he wouldnt be
surprised to see sightings continue
to increase. Polar bears, on the other
hand, appear to be facing a less
promising future.
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FOR SEVERAL HUNDRED thou-

sand years, polar bears have reigned

supreme as the Arctics top predator.
Theyre uniquely suited to a frigid
environment, expert at hunting
ringed and bearded seals. But Arctic
temperatures are rising at twice the
rate of those of lower latitudes, and
their habitat is changing drastically.

THE ORCAAN
ESPECIALLY SKILLED
PREDATORMAY
LEAVE ITS MARK ON
THREE ALREADY
THREATENED SPECIES.
Polar bears have survived warming periods in the pasteven to the
point of crossbreeding with barren ground grizzlies whose territory
overlaps theirs in the southern Arctic.
Charlotte Lindqvist, an evolutionary
biologist at the State University of
New York, Buffalo, published a study
in 2012 showing grizzlies and polar
bears have swapped DNA over the
course of about five million years.
Lindqvist suspects crossbreeding was
more frequent during warmer periods as polar bear populations plummeted and grizzlies moved north.
In fact, a handful of polar bear
grizzly hybrids have been confirmed
in the Arctic over the last decade. But
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this time, even hybridizing is unlikely

to have much of an impact on their
survival, says Andrew Derocher, a
polar bear researcher at the University of Alberta. Simply put, climate
change is happening too fast for them
to adapt, he says.
The concern over polar bears stems
from the fact the worst is yet to come,
says Gregory Thiemann, a polar bear
researcher at York University in Toronto. We havent seen catastrophic
declines yet, but based on a clear
understanding of the relationship between greenhouse gas emissions, sea
ice and polar bears, this is coming.
Current estimates peg the global
population of polar bears at between
20,000 and 25,000, a relatively healthy
number. But scientists generally agree
the animals future isnt bright. A
United States Geological Survey study
released in July 2015 confirms that
the most significant threat is declining sea ice. It also predicts polar bear
numbers will drop whether greenhouse gas emissions are reduced
or not. While the study suggests the
heavily iced Canadian Arctic Archipelago could be a last refuge, thats
only if global average temperatures
increase by no more than 2 C.
According to another study published in the November 2014 issue
of the scientific journal PLOS ONE,
more extreme warming trajectories
indicate polar bears could face mass
starvation and reproductive failure

The first-known photo of killer whales in Hudson Bay, taken in 2007.

across the entire Arctic Archipelago

by the year 2100.
If we cant keep them in the Canadian High Arctic and northern Greenland, we are not going to have them in
the wild, says Derocher, one of the
studys co-authors. The issue is that
polar bears are adapted to hunt seals
from ice platforms: Ive seen them
try for seals in open water, he says,
but they simply dont have the right
physiology. Ive never seen them succeed. They can supplement their diet
while on land during the summer with
seabirds, eggs and the odd caribou
carcass. And even when summertime
pickings are slim, polar bears are able
to tolerate long months without food.
But heres the crux: the bears survival
depends on its ability to feed on highcalorie seals when the ice returns.

Already, some populations are

experiencing declining weight and
increased mortality linked to disappearing sea ice. At least killer whales
in the Arctic are unlikely to eat polar
bears lunch. Inuit hunters have seen
the whales hunting seals, but there
are more than enough of them to go
around, says Paul Irngaut, director of
wildlife and environment for Iqaluitbased Nunavut Tunngavik Inc., an organization that represents the Native
treaty rights of the Inuit of Nunavut.
Ferguson, Thiemann and Derocher all agree. In the short term, the
whales may even be a boon for polar
bears. Orcas are messy eaters, leaving
behind large chunks of carcass after
a kill. Polar bears have been seen
feasting on the remains that wash
ashore. Thats not to say killer whale
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A female bear patrols Churchills rocky coastline.

appetites wont have an impact on

the Arctic ecosystem. As a University of Manitoba PhD student, Cory
Matthews analyzed stable nitrogen
isotopes from the teeth of two killer
whales found dead in Hudson Bay.
His results, published in 2014, suggest they are eating belugas, bowheads and narwhals.
A new predatorand one that is
especially skilledmay leave its mark
on these already threatened species.
While all three species know a predator when they see it, they have little
practice in evading one that moves
quickly and hunts in pods. Killer
whales preferred technique is ramming prey from below, but theyre
highly adaptable. Theyve been observed covering bowhead blowholes
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and keeping mothers down long

enough to take their calves. Theyve
also been seen biting off tails and fins
before going in for the lethal blow.
Under normal circumstances, belugas, bowheads and narwhals take
refuge in sea ice. But circumstances
are not normal in the Arctic, and
their hiding places are fast disappearing. When ice is not available,
they head for shallow water, perhaps
hoping the risk of beaching will dissuade orcas from following.
WHILE FERGUSON CANT predict
what impact killer whales will have on
any one of these whale species, that
doesnt stop him from worrying. As
sea ice melts, orcas will have access to
wider hunting grounds, putting their

prey at greater risk. I think they are

going to be in trouble, he says.
Ferguson also worries what fewer
belugas, bowheads and narwhals
could mean for the subsistence hunt
in Inuit communities. While nobody
is getting rich hunting these whales,
they are an important part of Inuit
culture. That includes the sense of
community that comes from hunting
together and sharing the kill.
The whales blubber and skin are
also significant sources of nutrients
that are otherwise hard to come by in
the Arctic. They contain high levels of
retinol (a form of vitamin A), vitamin
B, vitamin C, polyunsaturated fats
and protein.
While technically Inuit could substitute with orca blubber, people know
what they like to eat, and its not killer
whales. Besides, says Attitaq, the creatures can hold a grudge: Killer whales
are good hunters. They will never forget who made the bad choice to harm
them, and theyll come back to harm
you, so we dont hunt them.
For now, at least, Attitaq doesnt
believe the traditional hunt is

threatened by killer whales. In fact,

the opposite may be true. When
orcas herd their prey, which flee
to shallow water, Inuit hunters can
more easily make a kill.
Certainly the killer whales swimming around Remi Foubert-Allens
Zodiac were having exactly that effect
on the belugas. Their smooth white
bodies could be seen plainly beneath
the surface as they crowded close to
shore. Maybe the orcas werent hungry, or maybe they were distracted
by the boatload of enthralled tourists
bouncing across the waves. Whatever
the case, on that day at least, no one
witnessed a demonstration of the
animals potential as the Norths new
top predator.
Yet, as Ferguson points out, the
Arctic is changing quickly, and scientists need to pay close attention to
what is going on. [Polar bears] have
evolved to adapt to sea ice. Thats
their habitat, he says. In the end
we may lose ice-adapted species,
and others may move in. It might
look good. Yes, its biodiversity. But
were losing the originals.

2015 BY SHARON OOSTHOEK. FROM CANADIAN GEOGRAPHIC (DECEMBER 2015). CANADIANGEOGRAPHIC.CA

IN THE BEGINNING
A year from now youll wish you had started today.
ANONYMOUS

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MEMOIR

When Alison Motluk woke up to find a fire

raging on her front porch, she felt terrified.
By the time the ashes settled, she was surrounded
by her supportive community.

ARSON
in

EAST YORK
FR O M TO RO NTO L I FE

I LLUSTRATION BY BYRON EGGENSCHWIL E R

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READERS DIGEST

IT WAS A NOISE ON MY PORCH that woke me: a thud, maybe

something falling over. It was just after 3 a.m. on a sticky night in
September 2015. I opened the shutters of our bedroom window and
found myself staring at what looked like embers, floating lazily up
from below the porch roof. I told myself I must be imagining things
as I sprinted down the stairs to check. But, inexplicably, there it
was: a huge yellow-orange blaze, filling up the entire view through
the living-room window of our two-storey 1920s brick house in
Torontos east end. I remember the loud, galloping sound of the
flames. The campfire smell of burning Muskoka chairs. The way
the whole room was lit up with a warm glow.

For a moment, I stood there baffled. How could there be such a big
fire? Had we left something combustible outside? Was there a heat
source I didnt know about? It made
no sense. That was the last pensive
thought I had for a few hours. My
survival instincts kicked in quickly
and fiercely. I yelled up the stairs,
Theres a fire! Get out of the house!
My daughters, aged 12 and 14, raced
down and past me, quick but coolheaded. My husband was more skeptical. A fire? What fire? There was no
smoke, no blaring alarm. Then he
saw the flames.
WE RAN OUT THE back door and
around to the front, where we stood
on the sidewalk in our bare feet.
From there, my younger daughter
spotted a second, smaller fire, licking the front steps of a house a few
doors down. All became clear: it
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had to be arson. It turned out there

were six attacks in our neighbourhood that night within a 40-minute
spansome igniting the interiors of
cars, some lighting up garbage bins,
some, like ours, on porches. All were
set right next to homes.
I grabbed my phone and hadnt
even finished my call to 9-1-1 when
a fire truck rounded the corner and
stopped a few doors down. Later
I learned that the crew had been
called by a neighbour, but at the
time, the sight of that vehicle stopping short put me in a frenzy. I ran
over, waving my arms and calling
to the firefighters that there was a
much more serious fireoursjust
up the street.
One of them jogged over. As I
turned to point at our inferno, I realized that the flames had diminished.
Only then did I see my husband
standing on the porchbarefoot,

shirtless, in his underwearwaving

our lawn sprinkler over the ebbing
flames. He, too, had leaped into survival mode, grabbing the kitchen fire
extinguisher. After that was spent,
hed dragged the hose from the back.
You should let us take over now,
the firefighter told him gently.

I ALLOWED MYSELF
TO WONDER HOW
CLOSE IT HAD COME.
ONE FIREFIGHTER
TOLD US WE WERE
VERY LUCKY.

WITHIN MINUTES, BOTH fires were

out, leaving blackened remains.

Things grew quiet, and we continued
to stand out front. A neighbour two
doors south had come to see what
was happening, and she stayed with
us to commiserate. Another, from
several houses north, came over to
find out how we were. She could
hear our throats going dry, from the
talking and from the stress, and she
brought us all water.
Firefighters hauled some stuff
off our porch: the carcasses of our
Muskoka chairs, the burned skeleton of our exercise trampoline
and the storm-window glass that
had shattered from the heat. The

empty porch was charred and raw,

the brick was black, the ceiling blistered. Right above it, I knew, was the
master bedroom, where wed been
sleeping just an hour before. I stared
through the lone remaining pane of
1920s glass, into our living room. I
allowed myself to wonder how close
it had come. A firefighter told us we
were very lucky.
And thats exactly how I felt.
About an hour later, after the fire
crews and police officers had left,
we said good night to our neighbours and went inside. We all sat in
the living room, on the other side of
that flimsy glass. The smell of smoke
was still heavy. I poured two stiff gin
and tonics, and we talked through
what had happened, what could
have happened, and what miraculously had not happened.
FIRE INSPECTORS CAME BACK to
survey the damage and take pictures.
Soon another police officer knocked
on our door. He took our statements.
He said he was sorry about what had
happened and that theyd do their
best to find the person whod set the
blaze. (So far, no luck.)
It helped that the incident had
been random, I told my Facebook
friends in an early-hours post. It
helped that the fire hadnt spread
into the house. It helped that wed
acted decisively and without panic.
Most importantly, it was oddly
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READERS DIGEST

exhilarating to witness that, although

our world cant be free from danger,
we can build a society largely able
to cope. Everything, I realized, had
worked as it should. The firefighters were quick and adept. The police
were kind and respectful. The neighbours were supportive and warm.

After the officer left, I made myself

another drink. It was 5:45 a.m. Soon I
would watch the sun come up. The
girls would go to school. My husband
would go to work. And I would call
the insurance company, exhausted
and a little sad, to begin rebuilding
what wed lost.

DONT PLAY WITH FIRE

By Lisa Coxon

If a fire breaks out in your home, every second counts. Blazes progress quickly,
and temperatures can soar to 900 degrees Celsius in about three minutes. To
protect yourself and your loved ones, have a plan in place before disaster strikes.
EARLY DETECTION IS ESSENTIAL
Prevention is the first and most effective step in managing house fires: be
sure to install working smoke detectors
on every floor and carbon monoxide
alarms outside sleeping areas, and test
them monthly. Change the batteries
annually, says Stephen Welowszky,
division chief of public education with
Toronto Fire Services. Family members
of seniors should take extra precautions, he notes. Consider devices specifically designed for hearing-impaired
individuals that emit a strobe light, as
well as pager-like options that vibrate
if the alarm sounds while youre asleep.

EXTINGUISHER ABCs Fire extinguishers come in different types, indicated on their tags: A, B, C, or ABC.
Type A is for combustible materials like
paper and cardboard; type B is for
flammable liquids, such as cooking oil;
and type C is for electrical and appliance fires. Welowszky says type ABC
is best for households.

CAUTION IN THE KITCHEN In the

period between 2009 and 2013, cooking caused an average of 1,357 fires
a year in Ontario, according to the
provinces Office of the Fire Marshal

MAKE AN ESCAPE PLAN Know two

ways out of every room and off of each
floor (windows count), and rehearse
this drill regularly with all members of
your household.

and Emergency Management. In the

case of a grease fire, dont put water
on the flamesthis will cause them to
flare up violently, warns Welowszky.
Turn off the heat and smother the
blaze with another pan, if possible.

2015 BY ALISON MOTLUK. FROM TORONTO LIFE (DECEMBER 2015). TORONTOLIFE.COM

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@ Work
DETAILED LABELLING

POWERPOINT OF CONTENTION

ALL TOGETHER NOW

No one ever says, Boy, that I Have

a Dream speech could have been a
lot better if Martin Luther King Jr.
had used PowerPoint.

Conference calls are great if you want

to hear 15 people say What? from
the bottom of a well.
@BAZECRAZE

The greatest trick the devil ever

pulled was convincing the world he
didnt invent PowerPoint.

BUZZF EED.COM

Theres no I in team, but there

is one in PowerPoint, so you
should make it yourself and leave
me out of it.
meetingboy.com

THATS A BAD SIGN

Seen on a New York subway poster:

Se habla Espaol/Russian.
AARON FERNANDO, v i a In t e r n e t

Spotted on a restaurants website:

Glutton-free menu available.
EMILY PAYNE, v i a In t e r n e t

SAD SIMILES
SUPERVISOR: This project isnt

Read on a pharmacy marquee: We

sell beer and wine! We can flavour
your childs liquid Rx! Consumer Reports

something we can finish off quickly.

Its like an onion. It has layers we
have to peel away one by one.
CO-WORKER: And it will make us
cry a lot.
notalwaysworking.com

Are you in need of some professional

motivation? Send us a work anecdote,
and you could receive $50. To submit
your stories, see rd.ca/joke.
rd.ca

03 2016

71

FAMILY

My true story of
how leaving home
and growing up
can take a lifetime

Again
on My

Own
BY M IJI C AM P BE LL

F R OM SEPARAT I O N AN X I E T Y: A CO MI NG OF MIDDL E AG E STORY

PHOTOS COURTESY OF M IJI C AM P BELL

Here I Go

THRE E MON THS BE FORE I was

born, my mother was putting linens
away in the back bedroom closet.
Standing tiptoe on a wooden stool,
she stretched her pregnant frame
to stack the sheets on the highest
shelf. Suddenly, the stool tipped. She
fell, twisting to avoid landing belly
side down, wrenching her knee,
ripping ligaments.
My mother spent the rest of her
pregnancy with her leg in a plaster
cast from waist to ankle, worrying
about this baby that seldom moved.
On the day I was born, the nurse
had to ask the doctor what to do first:
birth the baby or remove the cast.
They cut the cast away, and I arrived
shortly after. My mother waited for
surgery that would leave a scar in the
shape of a cross on her knee.
This became the working model for
our relationship: my mother would
protect me from all bumps and falls,
with considerable contortion, pain
and self-sacrifice, and I would never,
really, leave the womb.
MY FO OT STE P S E CHO as I run
through the dimly lit underground
parkade to my car. In darkness
pierced by headlights and street
lights, I drive the 20 blocks to my
parents place.
Sanctuary.
I am 24 years old. It is 1984, and I am
teaching English at the Calgary high
school Id attended six years earlier.

One month previously, I had left

home. My two older sisters had
moved out, in their turn, and now it
was my time to go.
When I saw the apartment, I knew
it was the place for me. This is independence, I thought, as I signed my
cheques for the damage deposit and
first months rent. I was going to love
this life.
The first night, I snuggled under
my new sheets and waited for my
first sleep as an independent adult.
I turned from one side to the other,
flipped my pillow to its cool underside. Took a sip of water. Glanced at
the clock. Why couldnt I fall asleep?
The next night, same thing. And
the night after that.
2:35 A.M.

In just four hours, the alarm will

wake me up. That is, if I ever get to
sleep in the first place.
The familiar anxiousness begins.
Hot prickles reach across my scalp
and down my forehead and cheeks.
Breath comes in shallow scoops. My
heart races. My stomach lurches.
After a string of sleepless nights,
I mention my problem to some colleagues. They give stock remedies: hot
bath, warm milk, good book.
Finally, I confess to my mother.
Just come home to sleep, she says.
Its a strange double life. Each
night, I give sleep a try. After a couple
hours, I drive to my parents house.
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READERS DIGEST

I unlock the back door, tiptoe down

the hallway, crawl into my childhood
bed and instantly fall asleep. Each
morning, I rush back to my apartment to shower, get dressed and go
to work.
My father is mystified by my boomerang home. What are you afraid of?
Bears?
I try to explain that Im not afraid
of anything. I just cant sleep.

I TAKE ONE
TINY WHITE PILL THAT
NIGHT. STILL NO
SLEEP. I DONT GO TO
WORK THE NEXT DAY.
I CALL THE DOCTOR.
Eventually, it becomes clear that
this not sleeping thing isnt going to
pass. I go to our family doctor. He
gives me sleeping pills for 10 days to
break the cycle. When the prescription runs out, sleeplessness returns.
I go to see a new doctor and tell
her about my insomnia issues. She
assures me everything looks fine,
physically. She asks about family,
relationships, work in general.
Have you always wanted to teach?
That is a tricky one to answer. Ive
always wanted to be a writer, but that
sounds flaky. Teaching is my reasonable, responsible career choice.
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Are you enjoying your job? the

doctor asks.
Absolutely! Its great. Its fun,
but quite busy. The first year can be
a little intense.
She nods and smiles. Then she
launches into a lecture about personality types. Type As are ambitious, goal-oriented, competitive
and self-critical. Type Bs are relaxed,
non-competitive and tend to go with
the flow.
Would you say youre more of a
Type A?
I guess, I answer hesitantly.
Where is she going with this?
Im wondering if you might
be depressed.
Depressed? Depressed is Charlie
Brown talking to Linus. A person
might say Im depressed after a
tough week, a sad breakup, a bad
haircut. Being depressed all the time
is for people with horrible hardships
or sad childhoods.
Im not depressed. I just cant
sleep in my apartment.
Patiently, the doctor explains how
lack of sleep, over time, can lead to
depression. She prescribes an antidepressant that will restore my brains
chemical balance.
Dutifully, I take the prescription and drive to the drugstore. The
plastic vial is tagged with stickers
about alcohol, drowsiness and heavy
machinery. The pharmacist dispenses even more warnings, which I

The author with her mother,

Pat Campbell, in 1960.

miss in my rush to get out of the

store. To appear normal.
I take one tiny white pill that
night. Still no sleep. I dont go to
work the next day because I feel
spaced out on top of the usual
tiredness. I call the doctor. She
increases the dosage.
I return to my parents house to
be sickIm waiting for the antidepressant to work.
Mom doesnt like the way our private pact around not sleeping is compromising my day job. Insomnia can
be beaten, she believes, if you deny
its a problem. This approach has kept
her from sleeping soundly for years.
I cant wait three weeks to get to
the other side of mood improvement if it means wandering, zombie-like, through every day. I flush
the pills down the toilet. I am not
depressed. There is nothing wrong
with my brain.
I take a multivitamin instead.
After five consecutive sick-leave
days, I go back to work and pour all
of my energy into teaching. Nightly,
I return to my beloved apartment,
make supper and plan my lessons
for the next day. Macbeths grief over
his own lost sleep has never seemed
so poignant.
Sleep that knits up the ravelld
sleave of care....

What had I done to

murder my sleep?
Bedtime. Time for my high-wire
act. I stand on the platform, close
my eyes and take a step. Within a few
brave strides, I falter, lose my balance
and fall to the net below.
Just come home to sleep.
IM SITTING IN MY car in front of
a three-storey home. Its a warm,
blue-sky afternoon in June. I have
rushed from school to get here
on time.
This is the first time I am seeing
a psychologist.
I try hard to sound like I dont
need one. I speak quickly, using bigger words than usual. My life sounds
perfectly normal when I lay it out.
Terrific job, excellent parents, nice
friends, new apartment. A bit of a
sleeping problem.
She wants to know more about
t h i s, s o I f i l l h e r i n , s h ov i n g
my night fears under this rational
daylight. I condense six months of
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READERS DIGEST

The Campbell family (and dog Haggis)

in 1966 at their home in the Calgary
suburb of Kingsland.

frustration and shame into a breezy

comic monologue:
So there I am, past midnight,
pyjamas tucked into my sweatpants, speeding in my green Renault Le Car to sneak into my
parents house.
The psychologist looks thoughtful
and asks a few more questions. How
would you describe your relationship
with your parents?
My mom and I are really close.
Were a lot alike. Everyone says so.
We like talking, meeting new people,
teaching, shopping.
I pause. I know she is waiting for
the rest of the answer.
Ive never been close to my dad.
She nods and makes a few notes.
Has moving into your own apartment made you feel homesick?
No. I really wanted to move out
on my own.
But youve never been able to
sleep in your apartment?
No.
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Exposed, embarrassed, I decide

to tell her. Ive always had trouble
sleeping away from home. Even
when my mom went out for the
evening, I wouldnt be able to
sleep until she came home and
kissed me good night. But that was
when I was just a kid. A pause. Am
I ever going to be able to sleep in
my apartment?
The psychologist doesnt answer
right away. She shows me some
breathing and relaxation techniques.
She wants to see me again in a
week. I swallow my disappointment.
She hasnt cured me. She gives one
directive as I leave: Do not go back
to your mothers house to sleep.
IF YOU STILL CANT get to sleep,

says the psychologist at our next

session, you might as well use the
time productively.
The night shift begins. I set up the
ironing board with the laundry basket
beside it. I thread a needle, ready to
sew buttons and stitch hems. I stack
essays that need to be graded.
I try to sleep for 45 minutes. No
luck. I get up, snap on the light, do
push-ups and sit-ups and scrawl in
my journal.
I proceed to the chores. I hear
birds as morning light slants into my

apartment. My head aches. I lie down

and drift into a half sleep. Soon it will
be time to leave for work.
Two hard weeks go by. Im driving
back to my apartment late one night.
Its pouring rain and Im crying. Im
tired of trying to solve this on my
own. Tired of being tired.
I turn off the road leading into my
parents neighbourhood.
Sanctuary.
THE HOUSE IS STILL. Rain beats on
the roof. I stare at the ceiling as I lie
in my childhood bed. My mother sits
beside me, yawning, waiting for me
to fall asleep.
I remember all the nights we have
spent like this, like when I was afraid
of the dark behind the heavy closet
doors. Afraid of my sister Robins
noisy breathing. Afraid of being the
last one to fall asleep.
The rain subsides. I hear the sporadic plunk of drops on the eaves.
Im still awake. Wide awake. Irrevocably awake. I get out of bed and
make my way back to my apartment,
curiously relieved.
THE INSOMNIA PERSISTS through
the summer holidays, its jagged
edges smoothed by late-night wine
and mornings where I know I can
stay in bed, dozing.
If you still cant sleep, says the
psychologist at our next session,
you should increase your physical

activity. I take up aerobics and

swimming, but nothing changes.
With the first of the back-to-school
flyers, I begin to worry about my
return to classes. If I cant sleep,
then I cant teach. On a Sunday
night in late August, my oldest sister, Kim, phones. This is rareshe
and I arent in the habit of staying
in touch.
Kim had trouble sleeping, too.
Like me, she relied on Moms
bedside vigil as a child. Our mother
in flannelette pyjamas, hair in curlers, moving from room to room,
giving a benediction for our sleep
through a sacrifice of hers.
I know why youre not sleeping,
my sister says.

AFTER ALMOST TWO

DECADES, INSOMNIA
RETURNS, DRAGGING
WITH IT EVERY PIECE
OF MY DREADFILLED BAGGAGE.
KIM TELLS ME ABOUT the night, many
years earlier, when Id heard her, then
12, crying in her room. She had just
told Mom that shed decided not to go
to boarding schoolwhich shed been
excited to attendafter all. I never
knew my sisters side of the story.
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READERS DIGEST

I cried myself to sleep, but I promised myself that someday I would be

brave enough to leave.
Distanced by time and place and
choice, my sister gives me absolution.
Its all right to leave Mom.
That night I fall gently, effortlessly
asleep. Next night, same thing. And
the night after that. The insomnia has
released me.
AFTER ALMOST TWO DECADESduring which I got married, had two sons,
started writing professionally and,
most recently, got divorcedinsomnia
moves back in, dragging with it every
piece of my dread-filled baggage. I had
almost forgotten about those long-ago
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months of exhaustion. Theyd become

a blip in my memory, a tale for Ripleys
Believe It or Not, like someone whod
had hiccups for a year.
I consider my options.
I think about ringing Kim or calling
Mom. Of just picking up the phone
and admitting it. I need to come
home to sleep.
I snap on the light, grab my pen. If
I cant sleep, I might as well use the
time productively.
The night shift begins.
I write about things I dont want to
write about.
I am a woman who is afraid to
be alone.
I hate writing this personal stuff.

COURTESY OF JEN NI FER GRI FF ITH S

Campbell cherishes her childhood

collection of Nancy Drew mysteries (even
if the covers terrified her at the time).

Write.
This is not the kind of writing that
counts. I should be working on magazine articles like Six Survival Skills for
Stressed Single Parents or Risky Business: Why Rebound Relationships Fail.

I WRITE ABOUT HOW

I HAVE BEEN AFRAID,
ALWAYS. AFRAID OF
NIGHTTIME. AFRAID
OF BEING THE LAST
ONE TO FALL ASLEEP.
Write.
I am a 40-year-old woman who is
afraid to be alone.
This is useless navel-gazing.
Write.

I write about how I have always

been afraid. Afraid of nighttime in
my bedroom. Afraid of being the last
one to fall asleep. Afraid of my Nancy
Drew books, with their yellow spines
and scary covers.
But Nancy Drew was not afraid of
anything.
Suddenly, I feel myself smiling.
She hears a knock on the side window, opens her eyes. A young woman
is standing beside her Jeep. Slim and
attractive, the teen has blue eyes and
blondish-brownish-reddish hair one
might almost calltitian.
Flustered, the driver rolls down
the window.
Excuse me, maam, Nancy Drew
says, I saw that you pulled over
rather suddenly. Do you require some
assistance?
I keep writing.

2014 BY MIJI CAMPBELL. SEPARATION ANXIETY: A COMING OF MIDDLE AGE STORY

IS PUBLISHED BY WRITINERANT PRESS. WRITINERANT.COM

COMEDIANS RAISE A GLASS TO ST. PATRICK

NyQuil on the rocks, for when youre feeling sick but sociable.
MITCH HEDBERG

Im making wine at home, but Im making it out of raisins

so it will be aged automatically.
STEVEN WRIGHT

One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough.
JAMES THURBER

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79

SCIENCE

Why even the most honest among us

bend the rules now and then

THE LIARS

CLUB
BY JE NA P INCOTT FR O M PSYC H OLO GY TODAY

YAS U+ JUN KO; (P ROP STYLI ST) SA RAH CAVE FOR EH MA NAGEMENT

WHEN I WAS IN my early 30s, I would use an expired grad-student

ID to buy discounted movie tickets. (Id peeled off the date sticker.)
Im buying a ticket I wouldnt have otherwise bought, Id tell myself.
One must be resourceful in an overpriced city like New York, right?

If you also break rules sometimes,

you understand this paradox. We
think of ourselves as honest despite
daily acts (one to two on average) of
cheating, lying or otherwise innocuous rule breaking. We stand in the
express line with too many groceries,
play hooky from work, board planes
before our seat is called or fib to give
our kids an advantage.
Researchers who study everyday
transgressions believe character isnt
the real driver; situational forces are.
We might break the rules under some
conditions and in some mindsets,
but not in others.

THE CREATIVITY
DEFENCE
A few years ago, Francesca Gino, a
professor at Harvard Business School
in Boston, and Dan Ariely, a professor of psychology and behavioural
economics at Duke University in
Durham, N.C., wondered if people
with higher IQs were more likely to
cheat. The duo found that smarts
didnt correlate with dishonesty, but
creativity did. When Gino and Ariely
posed ethical dilemmas to employees
in an advertising firm, the copywriters and designers were more likely to
break the rules than the accountants.

The more creative you are, the easier

it is to embellish the reasons that you
acted out of line.
Test yourself. Why did you pilfer
office supplies? You might say you
worked through lunch or that businesses get the stuff cheaply. This is
how creative types reframe an event.
And a creative mindset, Gino found,
is easy to induce in almost anyone,
just by using subtle cues. When players in a dice game were primed to
think more flexibly (by being exposed
to words like original, novel and
imaginative in a text they read),
they cheated more often than those
who werent given these prompts.
Working for an organization that
stresses being innovative and original
can increase our tendency to cheat,
Gino says.
Ariely wonders whether we should
discourage creativity in banking.

THE STATUS
DEFENCE
Picture two accountants alerted to
suspicious entries in the books. The
first takes the violation seriously. The
second pooh-poohs it. Who has more
clout? When Dutch psychologist Gerben van Kleef asked study participants at the University of Amsterdam
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READERS DIGEST

that question in 2011, most chose the

second accountant. Powerful people
break the rulesergo, breaking rules
makes one seem more powerful.
In its modest form, rule breaking
is actually healthy, says Zhen Zhang,
an associate professor of management at Arizona State University. He
found that relatively minor Ferris
Buellerstyle violations during adolescencedamaging property, playing hookypredicted an esteemed
occupation: entrepreneur.
When young men, in particular,
take risks that pan out, their testosterone levels surge. The hormone
may underlie the winner effect, say
researchers John Coates and Joe Herbert of the University of Cambridge
in England, who, in 2007, tracked the
hormonal activities of stock-option
traders in London (again, all male)
over their good and bad days in the
market. The more wins, the higher the
hormones, the greater the confidence
boost, the bigger the risks, and so on.
But, at a certain point, risk taking can
become irrational, reckless or ruthless. This can cause ethical numbing,
according to Zhang. Consider Steve
Jobs: as Apple grew, so did lawsuits
against it, like those over patents.
Being wealthy takes a moral toll on
both genders. Assorted studies found
that the $150,000-plus-per-annum
set was four times as likely to cheat as
those making less than $15,000 a year
when playing a game to win $50. Also,
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that the rich didnt stop for pedestrians

at a crosswalk nearly as often as drivers who were less well offthis held
true even when people were roleplaying, that is, they werent rich in
real life.
Thats because environmentnot
any intrinsic personality traitabets
rule breaking, argues behavioural
scientist Andy Yap. In 2013, Yap and
his colleagues asked volunteers at the
University of California, Berkeley, to
sit in an SUV-size drivers seat versus
a cramped one, or an executive-size
office space versus a cubicle, and
then tested their responses to various
moral scenarios. In roomier settings,
people reported feeling more powerful and were likelier to steal money,
cheat on a test and commit traffic
violations in a driving simulation.

THE BONDING
DEFENCE
We arent born with an enlightened,
universal sense of fairness for all, Harvard University professor of psychology Joshua Greene argues in his
2013 book, Moral Tribes. We evolved
as tribal animals who followed the
rules within small groups (us) but not
with the rest of the world (them).
We may be born with a crude sense
of right and wrong, but our culture
refines it. If your tribe downloads
pirated music, sells dubious stocks
or accepts bribes, youre likely to go
with the flow or cover up for peers.

THE LEVEL PLAYING

FIELD DEFENCE
Lets say you saw someone tear
through a red light. Or a colleague
received a promotion after boozing
with the big boss, while you toiled
and got nothing. Chances are, youll
experience a knee-jerk reaction: to
get even, or at least to level the field.
For a study published in 2014 that
tested the fairness instinct, Harvard
researcher Leslie John, along with two
colleagues, told volunteers that others
in the room were making more money
than they were for getting questions
right on a trivia test. Guess what happened? That group, which perceived
itself as disadvantaged, cheated more
than the one that believed that everyone received an equal payment.

THE SOLUTION:
SELF-AWARENESS
The real threat is the slippery slope
that minor transgressions can snowball into cataclysmic ones. Imagine
Bernie Madoff or Lance Armstrong
thinking, Just this once. Okay, once
more. Eventually, they dont think
about it. Rule breaking worsens over
time. Kids who cheat on high school
exams are three times as likely in
adulthood to deceive a customer or
inflate an insurance claim compared
with the non-cheaters, according to a
2009 study out of the Josephson Institute of Ethics in Los Angeles.

Behavioural psychology offers a few

antidotes. Keep yourself fed and well
restedwere likelier to lapse when
hungry or tired. Reflect on how your
actions look through others eyes. In
a renowned 2006 experiment at Englands University of Newcastle upon
Tyne, a drawing of eyes mounted over
a collection box at a self-service coffee
bar helped enforce the honour system.
When people sign an ethics pledge
at the beginning rather than at the end
of tax forms or job applicationsthat
is, before theres an opportunity to
cheatthey are significantly less likely
to be dishonest. The same goes when
asked to recall the Ten Commandments before a test, which, Ariely says,
works even among the non-religious.
Most of us need to see ourselves in a
positive light. In a 2013 study by Stanford University in California, when
researchers used the verb cheat
please dont cheatparticipants still
cheated because they felt distanced
from the act. However, when the
noun cheater was useddont be a
cheaternot a single person did.
The novelist Wallace Stegner
summed it up in his 1967 novel, All
the Little Live Things: It is the beginning of wisdom when you recognize
that the best you can do is choose
which rules you want to live by. To
which he added: Its persistent and
aggravated imbecility to pretend you
can live without any.

2014 BY JENNIFER PINCOTT, PSYCHOLOGY TODAY (NOVEMBER 4, 2014), PSYCHOLOGYTODAY.COM

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As Kids See It

I sent three of my dolls to check under the bed for monsters,

and none of them have come back.

reddit.com

AND ONE FOR THE KIDS

Q: What did the zero say to
the eight?
jokes4us.com
A: Nice belt.

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MY GIRLS ARE identical twins.

They have always been pretty good
at sharing and are typically the best
of friends. Now that theyre teens,
though, they sometimes fight over
clothing. While arguing about a
particular item, Shea shouted at her
sister, Stop wearing my clothes! to
which Bryn quickly responded,
Stop wearing my face!
SANDRA KIRKPATRICK, D a r t m o u t h , N. S .

Do your children make you chuckle?

Share the laughter with us! A funny kid
story could earn you $50. For details on
how to submit an anecdote, see page 8
or visit rd.ca/joke.

CONA N D E VRI ES

A FEW MONTHS BACK, my wife

showed a picture of herself at the
age of seven to our three-year-old
daughter. Do you know who this is?
she asked. Our daughter gasped and
said, Thats me when Im bigger!

Going green
never goes
out of style.
The spring cleaning season
is upon us! Clear that household
clutter and organize your home
for a fresh start to the year.
By sorting through your clothing,
accessories, and books, you will
be able to really see what you can
keep, toss and what you can donate
to a nonprofit or to our nonprofit partners.
When you donate your gently used goods
to local and national nonprofits at Value Village,
youre giving them a second chance. Recycling
your items will help save the planet.
Value Village is committed to keeping 650 million lbs of reusable items out
of landfills every year. For more information on whom your donations benefit,
and to schedule a free pickup, go to valuevillage.com/donate.

EDITORS CHOICE

The

Great

Northern
Hockey

Adventure
BY DAN RO BS O N FR O M S P O RT S N ET MAGA Z IN E

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For 10 boys from Nunavut,

travelling 7,200 kilometres to play
in a hockey tournament isnt just
an epic road trip. Its a chance to
find out how good they really are.

READERS DIGEST

IT BEGAN WITH A RINK carved from a frozen sea, with sheets of ice

This was where and how the game

was played nearly five decades ago
when it first came to Whale Cove,
Nunavut, a community on the northwest edge of Hudson Bay. And this
is where the kids of Whale Cove still
act out their hockey dreams today.
Its where Tyson becomes Toews,
Simon turns into Kane, and Joe
morphs into Crosby. David stops
pucks like Price, and Steven snipes
like Kessel. On a frigid October day
in 2013, those stars piled out of
Gordon Panikas pickup truck and
launched into a game observed by
a new face. It was Andy McFarlanes
first fall in the hamlet of 350 people.
The boys invited McFarlane, the
Grade 8 homeroom teacher at Inuglak School, to play, and he ran home
to grab his skates and stick to join
their game. He lasted just 10 minutes
before tapping out, faking a leg injury. In truth, his feet were too cold,
but he didnt want to tell the boys,
who could stay on the ice for hours.
The temperature is one thing, but
hockey is also played differently in
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Whale Cove. Its full-time shinny,

a finesse game built on speed and
scoring and remarkable goaltending. Here, the local rink up the hill
from the bay is the central hub of
the hamlet. It was built in 1996 with
natural ice that sets by late November. Every day after school, McFarlane watched his students drag their
equipment uphill to play without
coaches or parents telling them how.
Self-taught and self-governed, they
skated until the buzzer went and the
older kids took the icea perfect
utopia of puck.
In the kids love of the game,
however, there was also an unfulfilled pride. McFarlane first saw
it in the pen-pal letters he had arranged for his class to send to his
old charges back at Geraldton Composite High School in Greenstone,
Ont., about three hours northeast
of Thunder Bay. The students in
the two schoolsespecially the
boysbonded over the timeless art
of chirping each other about their
hockey skills. The Whale Cove side

PHOTOGRA PHY BY JOHN KEALEY

stacked side by side, giving shape to the game. They played almost
every day, five to a side with no substitutions, in temperatures that
regularly fell to -50 C. In the dark months, theyd pull their trucks
up on a bank and skate by the glow of headlights. Sometimes their
feet froze or their cheeks turned brown with frostbite. But they
didnt care, because it was hockey.

Four Whalers drag their hockey gear to the rink, a post-school ritual in this hamlet,
where snow-covered roads lead up from the endless ice of Hudson Bay.

put forth a declaration: We would

destroy you. Ten days later, a reply
came back: Not a chance. Empty
words, because how do you know
how good you are if you never get
the chance to prove it?
THERE ARE TWO questions one is
asked upon arriving in Whale Cove:
Whats your name? and Who
do you help? They were the first
queries McFarlane faced when he
showed up, ready for a new adventure after nearly a decade of
teaching in northern Ontario. Hed
studied educational theories for

Native communities and taught on

a reserve, but nothing prepared him
for an inquiry so direct, and so existential. Who do you cheer for? was
the follow-up, to clarify, and this
time he got it. The Red Wings, he
said. But the other part stuck, too.
Who could he help? And how?
Some of the boys had been on
regional teams, but a group of kids
from Whale Cove playing as one
team, that had never happened. McFarlane knew his students possessed
the speed and skill to skate with any
of the teens at Geraldton. They just
lacked the opportunity and resources
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READERS DIGEST

to prove it. He wanted to give the

players a chance to experience life
outside of Whale Cove, to go on a
journey, a high-school sports road
trip. But it seemed impossible. The
teams flight to Winnipeg alone would
run upwards of $8,000. Then there
was the matter of the 16-hour train
ride to Greenstone. The team didnt
have jerseys. Several of the players required new gear. They needed
accommodations. They needed food.
They had nothing to begin with.

McFarlane purchased airline

points online with a credit card to
cover the flights before a plan was
set in place, risking that the expense
might not be covered. He started
a page on a fundraising site and
tweeted it to all the hockey personalities he could think ofTheo Fleury
shared it, as did Jordin Tootooand
soon there was a following. McFarlanes friends from Greenstone and
Thunder Bay started to help chip
away at the cost through individual

JORDIN TOOTOO IS THE ONLY PLAYER OF

INUIT DESCENT TO MAKE IT TO THE NHL.
THERES LITTLE MONEY HERE FOR HOCKEY.
Undaunted, McFarlane held tryouts for a 10-player school squad.
The roster was selected on skill
and school attendance. A group of
17-year-olds: Simon Enuapik Jr., the
captain; David Uklaagak, the goalie;
and Tyson Panika, the finesse player.
A group of smaller, younger forwards:
Joe Panika, the sniper; Hugh Enuapik, the quiet threat; John Voisey, the
vocal spirit; Adam Nattar, the talker;
and Demitre Alikashuak, the source
of all energy. The final two boys came
from Grade 8: Steven Panika, the
charmer; and Stanley Adjuk Jr., the
wit. Together, they were the Whalers.
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and group donations. The story

reached Torontos Breakfast Television co-host Kevin Frankish, who
arranged for an interview via Skype
with McFarlane and some of the
team. Then the money poured in,
until all $20,000 needed for their big
adventure was covered.
That was how their journey first
began. That was how 10 boys came
to travel 7,200 kilometres as the
Inuglak Whalers.
THE WALLS OF TYSON Panikas bedroom were lined with action photos,
posters and framed hockey cards.

The images werent just a tribute.

They were the goal. I lie in bed and
dream of being them, he said on a
bright March day in 2014.
Its a dream many in Whale Cove
share, but fewif anywill ever realize. Jordin Tootoo is the only player
of Inuit descent, and the first from
Nunavut, to make it to the NHL.
Simply put, there is little money for
travel, little money for programs,
little money to develop into the kind
of player who gets noticed by junior
scouts. But the isolation has its advantages. Without constant coaching,
hockey players in northern communities develop instincts for the game
that other kids dont have. Theres
also little else to do besides play
hockey. Whether that can translate
into becoming the idol on a young
kids wall, though, is where things
get tricky.
A chance was all Tyson needed.
Hed slept little in the past week as
his mind swirled with visions of the
glory awaiting him on the Whalers
first road trip, now so close at hand.
In the kitchen, Tysons 12-year-old
brother, Steven, tried to flip a puck
around on the blade of his hockey
stick, like hed seen Phil Kesselhis
favourite playerdo.
Gordon, the boys father and the
teams assistant coach, pushed them
out the door and into his truck. The
Panikas drove past neighbours waving from their porches, picked up

teammates and hockey bags at the

school, and headed for the small airstrip several kilometres away. There,
they were joined by more than two
dozen family members, in the terminal that comfortably seats maybe
10. This wasnt a typical kiss and run.
Several of the boys had never made
the trip south of Nunavut before. Parents were excited but apprehensive.
The plane took off as the sun set.
After a stop in nearby Arviat and
refuelling in Churchill, Man., the
scattered patches of light below
slowly grew more frequent. Is that
Winnipeg? Demitre Alikashuak
asked, his nose pushed up against
the small round window by his seat.
Is that?
McFarlane sat across the aisle. No,
Demitre. Not yet.
Demitre searched and searched in
the darkness, until eventually it gave
way to a wide field of light.
Is that it? he asked again, his
voice rising. Is it?
Yes, McFarlane said.
Oh, my God, Demitre said. Ho
lee cow. Whoa.
He pulled up his iPod Touch and
started to film. Wooo! he shouted.
Do you like what you see? McFarlane asked him. Thats a lot of
lights, eh?
Andy, I cant believe it.
A DAY LATER, SOMETIME after midnight, the boys were scattered across
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91

Clockwise from top left: A nervous

Stanley Adjuk Jr. (left) and John
Voisey lace up before their first
game in Ontario; John, ready for
action; Andy McFarlane speaks
to his team during intermission.

Winnipegs Union Station, curling up

to nap through the boredom of waiting
for a train already two hours delayed
by a snowstorm. This is the second
day weve missed hockey, Simon Enuapik Jr. complained to McFarlane. We
cant miss hockey tomorrow.
The Whalers captain never went
a day without playing, and he always
had the attention of every member
of his team when he spoke, they
listened. To Simon, the two things
the boys did mosthunt and play

waiting, he worried about how it

would all come together.
DOZENS OF PEOPLE WERE waiting
when the team finally pulled into the
stationnearly seven hours after the
scheduled arrival. Theyd missed the
spaghetti dinner held in their honour.
Theyd missed their first game. But
the fans cheered and whistled and
waved banners as the Inuglak Whalers walked off the train. The welcome
roars stretched into the following day,

THE WHALERS WERENT A TRAVELLING

ACT. THEY WERE A TEAM. A FAMILY.
AND FAMILY WAS EVERYTHING.
hockeywerent all that different.
Each was a tradition and a necessity.
Each was about precision and work
and respect.
Five a.m.that was when the train
finally pulled out. From there it was
a 16-hour trek through the bush of
northern Ontario. McFarlane thought
about the adventure they were on
and about the people of Whale Cove
who had welcomed him into their
community. This was his chance to
welcome them to his. Now, en route
to the place he considered his home,
where his family and friends and a
recently sparked relationship were

when the boys arrived at the arena to

find the Whale Cove logo and all of
their names painted on the ice.
Oh, theyre big, said eighthgrader Stanley Adjuk Jr. as he stood
outside the dressing room, staring
up at the Grade 12s from Geraldton.
Some of the Whale Cove boys looked
nervous. Theyd seen the crowd
every seat was filled, and more fans
stood several deep along the glass
and knew all of Whale Cove was
listening. Cecile Panika, mother of
Tyson and Steven, was giving a live
play-by-play for the radio station
back home. Before the game, she
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READERS DIGEST

went around the room, letting the

players greet their families, who had
gathered to listen to their boys.
Simon stared straight ahead, quiet
and seriousfocused on proving
that this trip was more than a gimmick. The Whalers werent a travelling act. They were a team. A family.
And family was everything, especially
in Whale Cove. I feel good, he said.
Im confident.
David Uklaagak sat with his goalie
pads on and eyes closed, leaning

Two periods later, Tyson and his

team slunk back into the dressing
room, trailing 7 to 2. David stared
down at his feet, shaking his head,
dripping with sweat. Im not playing
my game, he said. Hed made several
spectacular saves, but there was no
stopping the onslaught.
Simon glared straight ahead. Hed
played more than anyone, with shifts
lasting up to three minutes. He got
up and called Tyson and Joe Panika
outside. It was too hot in the room.

THERE WAS ANXIETY THAT THE WHALERS

JUST COULDNT MATCH UP WITH
KIDS FROM NORTHERN ONTARIO.
forward as he listened to Eminems
Legacy on his iPod. The 17-year-old
had been a goalie for only two years
but did a decent impression of his
idol, Carey Price. While working every
afternoon stocking shelves at the Coop to help his family, he still made it
to the rink in time for practice.
Tyson, the dreamer, had a huge
smile and eyes the size of toonies.
Did you see the girls out there? He
knew of two things this opportunity
afforded: the meeting of new girls and
a chance to finally be discovered on
the ice. The NHL, he thought, was just
a step away.
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It was too hot in the arenawhich

was cold by arena standardsso they
went outside the rink entrance and
leaned against the wall, steam rising
from their bodies as they commiserated over things gone wrong.
The cool-off worked. Simon scored
a hat trick in the third period, leading
his team on a crowd-rousing comebackbut the Whalers fell short 9 to
7. In the room afterwards, Tyson sat
on the bench looking like he might
cry. Hed scored a single goalnot
enough to be a superstar. His favourite stick had broken, and he had been
left using a spare.

There was an undeniable anxiety that, for

all the ceremony, the
Whalers just couldnt
match up with kids
from northern Ontario.
Still, the fans packed
in for the second game
and screamed as wildly
as they had the night
before, particularly for
Steven, whose small
stature and outsized
charm made him a big
hit. He scored twice, but
the Whale Cove boys
lost 4 to 3.
Later that evening, a
Goalie David Uklaagak, focused as always.
Geraldton player came
over to the bed and breakfast where and covered themselves in body spray.
the Whalers were staying to play Xbox. They entered the school together and
He brought an extra hockey stick for strolled into the low-lit gym where
Tyson, and the small gesture went students shifted awkwardly to a beat.
a long way. In the third game of the Too shy to approach girls, they drifted
series, Tyson scored four goals, and around in small packs. Eventually
the Whalers won 8 to 6 in front of a a girl asked Joe to dance. He stared
still-packed rink. After the game, they straight ahead, frozen. She asked
poured into the change room like again. He smiled. This is the last song
of the night, the DJ called out over
theyd captured the Stanley Cup.
The fourth game was a writeoff, the the speakers. Lets dance, she said
Whalers still drunk off winning and again. He breathed deep. Okay. They
distracted by the school dance set for walked to the floor as the viral hit The
afterwards. No one really seemed to Fox (What Does the Fox Say?) played,
mind as they dropped it 7 to 6. They ending the evening with musics versigned autographs before rushing sion of a cold shower.
home to shower and knot their ties,
taken from McFarlanes own collec- THE EXCITEMENT OF THE school
tion. They used combs and pomade dance seemed to have exhausted the
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(Above) The Inuglak Whalers patiently wait to play their first official game as a team;
(below) Tyson Panika faces off against Geraldton player Tyson Nadon to start the series.

Whalers for the fifth and final game

of the series the next day against
the local French high-school team,
the Chteau-Jeunesse Huskies, who
scored three quick goals to open
the first period. The Huskies goalie
shut down the Whalers attack
until Simon was able to get one back,
but the opposition added another
with just 10 seconds left in the first.
Endings are supposed to be neat
and tidy, and a sports story should
close with a game-winning goal with

The Huskies went ahead 5 to 4

before the end of the second and
added another early in the third on
a power play. The goalie kicked out
several remarkable saves to preserve the lead, and things began to
feel desperate until Tyson tipped in
a shot for his second hat trick of the
series. It was 6 to 5, Huskies. Minutes
later, Simon fired in a wrist shot, and
Demitre howled, Lets go!
And the clock ticked down to
the buzzer6 to 6, overtime. It was

DAVID MADE A SPRAWLING PAD SAVE.

THE FINAL MINUTE 30 SECONDS
20 SECONDS 10 SECONDS.
0.7 seconds left on the clock. But
thats not always how it turns out.
Sometimes you travel thousands of
kilometres and lose. Sometimes you
play a game every single day and
sometimes the game is your life, but
in the end, it will always be just that:
a game. You post pictures of heroes
on your walls as part of a goal that inevitably falls aside, because it has to.
But then, sometimes, Joe scores
and Tyson scores, and then Tyson
scores againand suddenly its 4 to
4 and nothing matters more to you, to
your team, than winning this damn
hockey game.

a back-and-forth affair. With two

minutes remaining, David made a
sprawling pad save. The final minute 30 seconds 20 seconds
10 seconds. Then Tyson picked up
the puck and cut up the left side,
around a Huskies winger, around a
collapsing centreman, past the Huskies blue line and deking past their
defencejust a goalie and less than
a second. And
0.7 seconds left. Final score: 7 to
6. Whalers win. The team rushed
the ice and the fans roared, and it
all ended as it sometimes does, as it
sometimes should.
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READERS DIGEST

But what did it all mean? Who did

it help? Stanley Adjuk Sr., the mayor
of Whale Cove, who came along to
watch his son play, thought about
that following the final win. After
this trip Im sure many of them will
think twice about what they want to
do, he said. If they have that chance
to go south, for education or something, take it. Thats my advice.
Theres heartbreak in that, too.
The boys will always come home,
he hopesbut the further they drift

They walked by people lying on the

streets, and Demitre stopped to give
one some food. David and Simon
stopped to give another some of the
cash theyd saved to buy new clothes.
And so the Whalers did as Whale Covers doYou would never see someone without a place to go in Whale
Cove, said David.
They went to their first Leafs game.
Two off-duty officers a few rows ahead
learned of their stories. They called
Joe and Simon down and gave them

MFARLANE CLIMBED BACK ON THE

BUS TO REJOIN HIS TEAM. ANDY, HOW
MUCH FURTHER? ANDY! ANDY!
away, the further tradition slips
along with them. Were going to
continue to lose it, he said. Thats
the reality of a generation that is
closer to the world outside the
hamlet than any has been before.
THE JOURNEY TO TORONTO came
nexta two-day bus ride with players
from the Geraldton team into a new
world. None of the 10 from Whale
Cove had ever been to a city so large
it was a place they had seen only on
TV, watching the Leafs play. They
stared at the cars and the people who
passedso many anonymous faces.
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the jerseys off their backs. And when

the owner of a small sports store
heard about the team over the Leafs
broadcast, he thought maybe he had
something to give, too. He sent a bag
of new skates for the team to take
back to the kids in Whale Cove who
had none.
McFARLANE CLOSED HIS EYES as
the school bus rumbled back toward
Greenstone. It was unusually quiet
the boys napped two to a seat. The
teacher couldnt know where their
thoughts were drifting, but his mind
was going home.

There was a letter inside his mailbox in the office at Inuglak School. He
had written it before he had left. The
deadline for deciding whether hed
return to Whale Cove for another year
fell during the long trip back. If he
did stay on, his sabbatical from Geraldton would expire and hed lose his
seniority. If he returned to Ontario,
hed leave the Whalers. But his own
life was waiting to move forwardhis
closest friends, a new girlfriend and
a family down south. A 31-year-old
man hits a point when the future
begs to become the now.
The bus pulled into the arena in
Greenstone to drop off the Geraldton players. McFarlane walked away
from the group, pulled out his phone
and dialed. The principal of Inuglak

School answered. McFarlane told

him about the letter. In a moment, it
was done.
He climbed back on the bus, where
the team was clamouring for his
attention. Andy, do you want some
chips? Andy, how much further?
Andy, wheres Demitre? Andy!
Andy! Andy!
The teacher thought back to when
he first arrived in Whale Cove, just
another stranger drifting into their
world. Whats your name? he was
asked. And who do you help? The
kids skated on a frozen bay, playing
for hours in the cold when he could
stay for only minutes. And so they
would continue on in Whale Cove,
without him. Playing as they always
havewith and for each other.

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE MAY 12, 2014, EDITION OF SPORTSNET MAGAZINE. USED WITH PERMISSION
OF ROGERS PUBLISHING LIMITED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

DOGGONE IT!
Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings?
Its hardly ever for them.
HARRY HILL, comedian

Weve begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we

bought a dog. Its cheaper and you get more feet.
RITA RUDNER, comedian

Were eating dinner soon. Dont fill up on homework.

Dog mom
ALEX BAZE, comedy writer

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99

Lifes Like That

YEAH, SAME

GREAT REVELATIONS

My worst nightmare is watching

isolated footage of me at a concert
Im enjoying.
@MOLLYMCNEAREY

Startling ideas uncovered by

Tumblr users:
Spoons are just little bowls on sticks.
Lets all take a minute to recognize the lack of creativity in the
word fireplace.
When you wait for the waiter, do
you not become the waiter?
Neil Armstrong was the first person
on the moon.
Neil A.
Now read that in reverse.
Wake up, America.
tumblr.com

INSULT AND INJURY

The most cutting thing you can say

is, Whos this clown? because it
implies the other person is a) a
clown and b) not even one of the
better-known clowns.
@SKULLMANDIBLE

PERMANENT REMINDER

Tattoos are great for preserving

memories. Otherwise, I would have
totally forgotten about that anchor.
C o m e d i a n KARL CHANDLER

100

03 2016

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Send us your original jokes! They could

be worth $50. See page 8 or visit rd.ca/
joke for more details.

SUSAN CAM ILLERI KONAR

Im having an ethical dilemma bringing him into a world of global warming.

GET SMART!
13 Things
You Should
Know About

Credit Cards
BY DA I N A L AW R E NC E

You can charge your way to a

better credit score. A person
with no history is often considered
the same as someone with poor
credit, says Jacob MacDonald from
Consolidated Credit Counseling
Services of Canada.

ISTOCKP HOTO

Many companies offer extended

warranties on merchandise
such as that new flat screenfor up
to a year beyond the manufacturers
guarantee. Restrictions may apply,
so call your card provider to find out
about exclusions.

Keep an eye on sales. Your provider might offer a price protection policy: if you buy an item at full
ticket value and it goes on sale
within 60 days, you may get reimbursed for the difference by your
credit card company. Youll need
proof of purchase and a record of
the new price.

Put your negotiation skills to

use. If youre having trouble
making payments, ask about having
your interest rate reduced. But do
your homework first: compare
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READERS DIGEST

your card with others so that youre

armed with a bargaining chip.

The key to sitting front row at

Chers next farewell tour might
be in your wallet. Credit card companies often have pre-sale deals on
tickets to eventsfrom concerts to
sports matches. You might have to
upgrade to a higher limit or status
(along with an annual fee), but the
savings could be worth it.

Each company offers different

benefits, so you may get perks
like preferred rates or rewardsby
switching from one provider to
another. But if youre someone who
struggles to pay your monthly balance, fancy travel rewards arent
worth extra fees, MacDonald says.

10

That said, loyalty matters.

Unless theres a reason you
need to switch, stick with what you
know. Your credit score is partly
based on the length of time youve
had your cardthe longer, the better.

Swipe cautiously. In 2008, an

American study revealed that
buyers were more likely to spend
or overspendon luxuries when
using credit or gift cards rather than
cash. Shoppers have a harder time
perceiving purchases on plastic as
real money spent.

11

12

13

Access to credit gives our brains

a buzz. Peter C. Whybrow, the
director of the Semel Institute for
Neuroscience and Human Behavior
at UCLA, suggests thinking about
the reasons why youre shopping
and ensuring youre not doing it just
because it feels goodto avoid
spending impulses.
Frequently missing payment
deadlines? Avoid late penalties
by arranging to have your balance
settled automatically every month.
Call your bank or check online to set
up the service.

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03 2016

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Work in smaller increments.

Paying your fees weekly may
help you keep better track of funds
and facilitate reaching a zero balance every month, MacDonald says.
A minimum payment should
be just that. Its the amount
you must pay in order to avoid having
your credit score harmed or your
interest rate spike. With some cards
imposing a rate of almost 30 per cent,
you might want to consider a credit
line (with prime rates around 2.7
per cent) for your next big purchase.
If you find yourself in debt,
theres helpand advice is
often free. Non-profit organizations,
like the Credit Counselling Society,
can offer tips on how to pay it off or
manage your creditors.

Thats Outrageous!
ON THE ROAD
BY GRAEM E BAYLISS

SMASH HIT

Some new drivers

pass their road
tests with flying
colours. Others
fail with flying
glass. One October morning last
year in Bellevue, Wash., a young
woman was headed to her final
in-car exam. When she got to the
driving school, she attempted to
park. Unfortunately, she missed
the brake pedal, accidentally slamming on the accelerator instead.
The vehicle careened through
the front of the building, smashing
its plate-glass facade and the rear
window of the womans Audi, too.
Thankfully, there were no injuries
except to the students pride.

PIERRE LORANGER

JOYRIDE

Last November, some young men in

Perth, Australia, gave new meaning
to the phrase out to lunch when
they were spotted cruising the
streets on a pair of motorized picnic
tables. Police were understandably
perturbed by the atypical transpor-

tation methodthe
vehicles were
unlicensed,
unregistered
and unsafe. On
the plus side,
they handled
well: despite its
primitive steering mechanisms, the
puttering furniture manoeuvred
through a busy city intersection
with ease.
MAN VS. MACHINE

In November 2015, police in

Mountain View, Calif., pulled over
a car for moving too slowly: more
than 15 kilometres an hour below
the speed limit. But when the cop
strolled up to the door, he found
there was no one inside to reprimandthe vehicle turned out to
be a self-driving Google prototype.
The much-publicized incident
became a boon for the tech giants
marketing department. Call it another innovation of our high-tech
age: there is now literal truth to
the saying, The engines running,
but nobodys behind the wheel.
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103

MORE GREAT READS THIS MONTH

Rd.ca/connect
FOOD

8 Great Grilled
Cheese Recipes

Gourmet twists on a classic sandwich,

courtesy of top Canadian chefs
H E A LT H

Simple Tips to Slow Aging

A seven-day plan to cut your risk of disease and
effectively manage the health
conditions you may already have

T R AV E L

5 Memorable
March Break Getaways

From exploring ancient caves to walking

on the ocean floor, these family-friendly
destinations offer activities that are
anything but average
/r e a d e r s d i g e s t c a n a d a

ISTOCKP HOTO

@readersdigestca
/r d c a n a d a
/r e a d e r s d i g e s t c a
Newsletter

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Brainteasers
Challenge yourself by solving these puzzles and mind stretchers,
then check your answers on page 108.

CHIP OFF THE OLD BLOCK

(Easy)

A cube with sides that measure a whole number of centimetres has a smaller 1 cm
cube cut out of one corner.
If the illustration to the right
is to scale and the rest of the
cube is intact, what volume
of the cube remains?

1 cm

DA RREN RIGBY

COVER-UP (Difficult)

Cover six of the numbers in

the diagram with the operators below (+, , , ) so
that the resulting expressions (evaluated left to right
and top to bottom, without
following the order of operations) come to the answers
indicated. Numbers may be
adjacent to each other in the
final grid to form multipledigit numbers.

= 12

= 36

37

19

12

160
rd.ca

= 48

= 30

03 2016

105

MYSTERY NUMBER

(Easy)

If the last column

follows the same
logic as the first
three, what is the
missing number
in the final cell?

25

49

16

81

625

2401

22

93

655

PICK-UP STICKS (Moderately difficult)

Find the three numbered sticks in the left-hand diagram that overlap each
other in the way shown in the example triangle; that is, each stick should
have one end overand one end underone of the other two sticks.
2

8
4
6

3
5

SUB HUNT (Difficult)

Four hidden submarines must be located.

The numbers in the grid represent sonar
stations that tell how many sea squares at
any distance directly north, south, east and
west are occupied by submarines. The submarines are each three sea squares long
and fully inside the grid. Can you find all
four of them?
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8
5
2
S

(M YSTERY N UM BER) M ARC EL DAN ESI ; (P I CK-UP STI CKS) DARREN RIGBY; ( SU B HU NT) ROD E RICK K IMBAL L OF PATHPU ZZL E S.COM

READERS DIGEST

Trivia Quiz
BY PAUL PAQ UET

1. Pescatarians are semi-vegetarians

who eat something fleshy. What is it?

2. Who was nominated for an Oscar
in the supporting-actor category for
The Godfather, despite having had
more screen time than leading-actor
winner Marlon Brando?

8. Which chemical element becomes

a gas at temperatures higher than
-268.9 C, the lowest known elemental boiling point?
9. Which sports hall of fame features

Johnny Weissmuller, also notable for

having played Tarzan in many movies?

3. What 1980s Alan Thicke show was

10. What actor plays a stranded

the first American sitcom to gain a

sizable viewership in China?

astronaut in both Interstellar and

The Martian?

4. What was the stage name of the

world-renowned French playwright
who was born Jean-Baptiste Poquelin in 1622?

11. The 19th-century chemist Alfred

5. Which Beatle decided to Act Naturally when he starred in the notoriously terrible film Caveman?

12. Which was the first Disney movie

Nobel considered naming one of his

inventions safety powder, but it
wasnt actually very safe. What was it?
with a direct-to-video sequel, namely,
The Return of Jafar?

6. Traditionally,
what is the signature
spice used in Hungarian cuisine?
7. Who is the only

14. Which food-company

15. Starting from
Genesis, what is the first
book of the Bible named
for a person?

mascot was initially

mistranslated into
Arabic as the Intimidating Green Ogre?

ANSWERS: 1. Seafood. 2. Al Pacino. 3. Growing Pains. 4. Molire. 5. Ringo Starr.

6. Paprika. 7. Pierre Elliott Trudeau. 8. Helium. 9. Swimming. 10. Matt Damon.
11. Dynamite. 12. Aladdin. 13. Coffee. 14. The Jolly Green Giant. 15. Joshua.

ISTOCKP HOTO

Canadian prime
minister whose son
also became PM?

13. What beverage

gets prepared in a
French press?

rd.ca

03 2016

107

Sudoku

Brainteasers:
Answers
(from page 105)

BY IAN RIE NS C H E

7 5
6 1 8

CHIP OFF THE OLD BLOCK

63 cm3. The original cube
was 4 cm x 4 cm x 4 cm,
or 64 cm3. With the chip
missing, its now one cubic
centimetre less.

8
4

COVER-UP
3 3
4 6

8 2

3 1
4 7
9

5
2

3
1

8 2
8
2

2 4 9
1 3

4
3
37

2 = 48
5

4 = 12
1

2 = 36
2 7 = 30

3 0 19
12 160

MYSTERY NUMBER
2457. The number in the
second cell of each column
is the square of the first,
and the third cell contains
the square of the second.
The bottom cell contains
the sum of the three numbers above it.
PICK-UP STICKS
2

TO SOLVE THIS PUZZLE

You have to put a number from

8
4
6

1 to 9 in each square so that:

3
5

8
4
5
1
6
2
7
9
3

2
7
3
4
9
5
8
1
6

6
9
1
7
8
3
2
5
4

rd.ca

9
2
6
8
3
7
5
4
1

3
8
7
5
4
1
6
2
9

03 2016

5
1
4
6
2
9
3
7
8

7
6
9
3
5
4
1
8
2

108

1
3
2
9
7
8
4
6
5

each of the 3 x 3 boxes

has all nine numerals,
none repeated.

SOLUTION
4
5
8
2
1
6
9
3
7

every horizontal row

and vertical column
contains all nine numerals
(1-9) without repeating
any of them;

SUB HUNT
N

8
5
2
S

(S UDOKU) S UDOKUP UZZ LER.COM

7
6 8
9 4

4 0

Word Power
X and Z are among the shortest chapters in an English dictionary.
Without peeking into yours, try to define the following words that
start with these two rarely used letters.
BY SAM ANTH A RID EOU T

1. xanthic

6. zephyr

A: gummy.
B: yellowish.
C: calming.

A: pleasantly
bitter taste.
B: light breeze.
C: inoffensive
comedian.

2. zeitgeist

A: game-changing event.
B: harmless ghost.
C: spirit of the times.
3. xenon

A: chemical element with

atomic number 54.
B: planet Jupiters
red spot.
C: bull monster
from ancient Greek
mythology.
4. xiphoid

7. zygote

A: fertilized egg.
B: dormant virus.
C: cheekbone.
8. xeric

A: disillusioned.
B: dry.
C: concerned with
appearances.
9. zoolatry

A: plotted on a graph.
B: sword-shaped.
C: notched.

A: study of animals.
B: worship of animals.
C: care of animals.

5. xilinous
pertaining to
A: luxury.
B: infinity.
C: cotton.

10. zymology

science of
A: muscles.
B: welding.
C: fermentation.

11. zealot
A: tax dodger.
B: arsonist.
C: extreme
partisan.
12. xenial
A: forgetful.
B: hospitable.
C: resourceful.
13. zonk

A: stun, as with
a blow.
B: trip and fall.
C: squabble
loudly.
14. Zoilus

A: unnecessarily
harsh critic.
B: greedy capitalist.
C: misleading
public speaker.
15. xyloid

A: silly.
B: tinny.
C: woody.
rd.ca

03 2016

109

READERS DIGEST

Answers
1. xanthic[B] yellowish; as, Not

a fan of white wedding dresses, Ana

settled on a gown with a xanthic tint.
2. zeitgeist[C] spirit of the times;

as, Douglas Couplands Generation

X was praised for capturing the zeitgeist of the early 1990s.
3. xenon[A] chemical element

with atomic number 54; as, Xenon

gas is used as a general anaesthetic
because its fast-acting and non-toxic.
4. xiphoid[B] sword-shaped;

as, Yucca plants are known for

their xiphoid leaves and lightcoloured blossoms.
5. xilinous[C] pertaining to

cotton; as, After the air conditioning

broke down, Angad wished his suit
were made of a more breathable,
xilinous fabric.
6. zephyr[B] light breeze; as,

A zephyr animated the laundry on

the line, creating a picture-perfect
springtime scene.
7. zygote[A] fertilized egg; as, In

vitro fertilization involves creating

a zygote outside the human body.
8. xeric[B] dry; as, Trees from
England dont tend to thrive in the
xeric climate of Arizona.
9. zoolatry[B] worship of animals;

as, Meike teasingly accused her boy110

03 2016

rd.ca

friend of zoolatry after watching him

fawn over his cat.
10. zymology[C] science of fer-

mentation; as, Before refrigerators,

zymology offered a way to preserve
food and drink.
11. zealot[C] extreme partisan;
as, Despite the similarities between
the two parties platforms, zealots
on both sides opposed a coalition.
12. xenial[B] hospitable; as,
The mayor implored the suspicious
townspeople to adopt a more xenial
attitude toward tourists.
13. zonk[A] stun, as with a blow;

as, Seeing that Batman was distracted by an overturned school bus,

the Penguin snuck up and zonked
him with an umbrella.
14. Zoilus[A] unnecessarily

harsh critic; as, Apart from a few

predictably scathing reviews from
known Zoiluses, Branwells novel
was well-received.
15. xyloid[C] woody; as, Heathers
homemade wine had a xyloid taste
from the grape stems she had forgotten to filter out.
VOCABULARY RATINGS

710: fair
1112: good
1315: excellent

R
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IN

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TH R I B E
N
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Quotes
BY CH RISTINA PALASSI O

The trouble
with normal
is it always
gets worse.

I DONT THINK
ANYONE WAS EVEN
THINKING ABOUT
GHOSTBUSTERS AS
A BLOCKBUSTER. IT
JUST SEEMED LIKE
A FUNNY MOVIE .
IVA N R E ITM A N

B R U C E CO CK B U R N

ITS NOT A COACH THAT MAKES A TEAM. ITS

THE TEAM THAT MAKES THE COACH. G LE N SATH E R
Everywhere I go,
particularly when there
are people who know
me or recognize me,
I get the warmest hugs
and happiest sighs, full
of hope and relief.
M A R GA R E T TR U D E AU

My sheer existence
is like a political
act, I think, to a
lot of people. Its
not to me.
GRIMES, mu sici an

PITY IS JUST
ANOTHER
FORM OF
ABUSE.
M I CH A E L J . FOX

Should not a
career be something
splendid, wonderful,
spectacular or, at the
very least, something
varied and exciting?
LU C Y M AU D
M O NTG O M E RY

PHOTOS: (COCKBURN) BR UCE COCKBURN 2015; (GRIMES) JOHN LOND ONO/COURTESY OF

REQUIEM MEDIA; (FOX ) MAR K SELIGER/NBC. QUOTES: (REITMAN) TIME OUT.COM (AUG. 20, 2014);
(COCKBURN) COCKBUR NPR OJECT.NET; (SATHER) THE GLOBE AND M AIL ( D EC. 5, 2015); (TRUDEAU)
T HE N EW YORK TIMES (NOV. 7, 2015); (GRIMES) VICE.COM (NOV. 6, 201 5) ; ( FOX) THE GUARDIAN
(OCT. 6, 2 013); (MONTGOMERY ) UPENN.EDU.

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