Master volume including

FAQ Me & FAQ Me Too

FAQ ME
JAMES ALTUCHER
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CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION TO FAQ ME AND FAQ ME TOO ............................ 23!
PURPOSE OF LIFE ......................................................................... 25!
What do you think is the purpose of life? @adriennetran ..................................... 25!
What do you do when things keep getting worse? ................................................ 25!

DATING ......................................................................................... 31!

What are your feelings concerning online dating? Would you treat it like a new
business, considering the interactions? @jeehtoven ............................................ 31!
Do you have any dating advice for introverts? @dylanized .................................. 32!
I want a relationship with someone who is actually like me. So what is the next step?
I'm in school until summer next year, which means I can't go anywhere.
spekkhogger123 ................................................................................................ 33!
At what moment did you know you were in love? Did you have a Shazam moment!?!
@martycos ...................................................................................................... 34!
How do you know if you are in love or just limerice? @RolandBarat ..................... 34!
Suppose youve gone on three or four dates with a girl, do you ever ask her: Where
do we stand? @eugenephoto ............................................................................ 35!
How do I improve my social game? Meeting new people, potential love interests, etc.
@randyaaron ................................................................................................... 35!
Words of advice someone said to you that changed your life? @adriennetran ....... 36!
How do I end relationships (personal, business, etc.)? @chucklecoq .................... 36!
What is the best way to meet new people? Im quite introverted/shy but I do have a
(very) tiny circle of (close) friends. @binarymac ................................................. 37!

DRINKING ..................................................................................... 39!

Why did you quit drinking? - @robin_ahn ............................................................ 39!

LOVE .............................................................................................. 40!

Is love, marriage, children, and all of that just a waste of time and money in the end?
@jaisondm ...................................................................................................... 40!
What are the statistics of men cheating more than once? @LynnHasselbrgr ......... 40!

What do you do when someone you love is very depressed/or sad? @Unpacktherat
........................................................................................................................ 41!
Love or career? @Karlavigilante ........................................................................ 42!
Where should I go on my honeymoon? @VeryStonemanEsq ............................... 43!

SEX ................................................................................................ 44!

Whats the easiest way to get into a threesome? @bear23 .................................. 44!
How can I have charisma? - @PriscillaPWood....................................................... 44!
In marriage how often should a man/woman get paid or have sex with their
significant other? @Psfs .................................................................................... 45!
Good friend is cheating on wife. Should I tell the wife? Asked anonymously through
DM.................................................................................................................... 46!
How do I go through life loving just one woman when I see floods of beautiful
women every day? Shouldnt monogamy be dissolved? @eefeanyi....................... 46!

MARRIAGE .................................................................................... 48!

What is the purpose of marriage? @RobertSinn .................................................. 48!
But do you have to be legally married? - @RobertSinn .......................................... 48!
What is the ONE piece of advice do you have if you have a newborn baby? @euros
........................................................................................................................ 51!
Best advice for newlyweds? ;) -@abbymaries ....................................................... 54!

DIVORCE ....................................................................................... 56!

When do you decide to leave someone? At what point is it really over? Even if you
share children? @brainybetty .............................................................................. 56!
If I make a billion shall I rub it in the ex-wifes face? @TraderStrong ................... 57!

LIFE ............................................................................................... 58!

I spend a great deal of time holding myself back. How do I stop it?? - @wiztrader 58!
How do you take that next step towards living and adventure when life is full of
inertia to stay silent and still? @kaisdavis ........................................................... 59!
How can one be both smart and good looking? @Mike_Ocsbig ............................ 60!
What defines you as a person? @Morgan_03 ..................................................... 60!
Really? Not even loving father, caring husband, successful entrepreneur?@Morgan_03 ..................................................................................................... 60!

What would James Altucher do if he was 25 years old right now? @rballe33 ........ 60!
Whats your perfect day like? @brainybetty ........................................................ 61!

CRAPPY PEOPLE ............................................................................ 63!

What do you do when you cant ignore the crappy person because you have to report
to them? @shoaglun ........................................................................................ 63!
What is the best way to deal with a co-worker who consistently discredits you in a
passive aggressive way? @robertsgm ................................................................ 64!
What should you do if youre avoiding a friend and you dont know why? @estheria
........................................................................................................................ 64!
I hate calling people back that are energy drainers. Do you think I will have bad
karma if I dont call them back? @Bert_Hancock ................................................ 65!
What do you do when someone wont forgive? And when they have no desire for
owning their part, only hating & feeling like victim? -@asplenia ............................. 66!
Would the world be a better place if each person in the world had a no retaliation
allowed, one free punch per year? @icekevin ..................................................... 66!

MOTIVATION................................................................................. 68!
I know that you write a lot about getting motivated when times are bad, but how do
you stay motivated when times are good? @derekwhurst ................................... 68!
What motivated you to when you were 20, 30, 40 yrs old - @marty7higgins .......... 68!
How do I motivate others? @AmanAlam ............................................................ 69!
Which gives you more satisfaction, reinventing your own life or inspiring others to
reinvent theirs? Why? @iChmpneGrl .................................................................. 69!

SUCCESS ....................................................................................... 71!

How do you define success? @TalentedBlonde ................................................... 71!
In your opinion/experience, what defines success? @texandcoda ........................ 72!
If there was a shortcut to success, what would it be? @kehindabajo.................... 72!
What is the sixth law of power and how important is it? @justinjmoses................ 73!

JOBS .............................................................................................. 74!

Is it ever too late to escape from Corporate America? Even for a serious career
change? GoldenStLiberty .................................................................................. 74!
I have a trouble finding a job, although I got an MBA in US, worked in China for 7
years, trilingual, trying hard on networking. -@Jacquelinexu ................................. 75!

I wake up every morning and am positive for about 30 seconds and then the tick list
of everything negative creeps in, suggestion? @ScottVanEpps............................. 76!
How do you do things you hate but have to do? @liewmomo .............................. 77!
How did you go from HBO to Hedge Funds? @Hamzah81 ................................... 78!
What balance should we have in life between: learning by reading or watching others
/ learning by doing? @HarrisonAmy ................................................................... 78!
Is being married to work really a bad thing when you are young. Do I really have a
lot of time to find my life partner? @niketdesai................................................... 79!
What are your tips for interviewing? I always seem to choke up and get performance
anxiety. @unionkane ........................................................................................ 80!
How can you set yourself from the competition in a job interview? ........................ 82!
How do you get so much energy to do the things you do? @yoda_2little.............. 82!
Been a stay at home housewife for 8 years and want to go back to work badly but
feel defeated and hopeless about finding a job. How do I get out of funk?
@mainlinewife ................................................................................................... 83!
How do you know when the time is right to take the plunge, quit your job and focus
on your own business? What about family risks? @adamclay211 ......................... 84!

GOING BROKE ............................................................................... 85!

What did you do to make money after you went broke? @ScottEPowers .............. 85!
Have you ever given up on yourself? @bluenextbear .......................................... 86!

OPTIMISM ..................................................................................... 87!

Do you think optimism and being positive even if you fail, and start again, and fail will
make you succeed? @catalin357 ....................................................................... 87!

MONEY .......................................................................................... 88!

With Europe about to default, high employment, gold (the ultimate fear metal) on the
rise, why should anyone still be bullish? @ginger_gal.......................................... 88!
What would be your strategy to get wealthy? @djmainevent ............................... 88!
Is greed good? @tradefast ................................................................................ 89!

BEING STUCKED............................................................................ 91!

How Can I Get Un-Stucked?................................................................................ 91!

PERFECTIONISM ........................................................................... 96!

How do you deal with perfection? Many times I feel I cant execute ideas until I know
it 100%. @socialhotchoco ................................................................................. 96!
How do I deal with anxiety about not being perfect at everything I do?
@paramkamal ................................................................................................... 96!

GOALS AND ADVICE ...................................................................... 98!

How important is having a plan if you want to get anywhere in life? @djmainevent
........................................................................................................................ 98!
Who do you turn to for advice? @bondtrader83 ................................................. 98!
What would you tell the 17 year old you if you got the chance? @JessWhat ......... 98!
Should we take advice from others? @ibrute ...................................................... 99!
What is one small way to improve my day to day routine? I need to add another
positive piece to the puzzle? @randyaaron ........................................................ 100!
Whats your dream? Whats your biggest goal in life? @valuewalk ...................... 100!
How do you learn to think on your feet? @socialhotchoco .................................. 101!
For a 30 year old, no debt, no kid, likes job, has unneeded $100,000 in bank earning
1%. Leave it there long term or into VTI (the broadly diversified stock market)?
@optrader0 ...................................................................................................... 102!
Give me one piece of killer advice that i can use daily to make it a successful 2012
@AJBoom ......................................................................................................... 103!

COLLEGE......................................................................................104!
Should I follow my lifelong dream or go to college? @himynameissteev .............. 104!
You said dont go to college, may I know why? @CashN1n9 ............................... 104!
Why do you often encourage people to drop out of school, when you graduated from
a good college with a respectable degree? @oliverg12 ....................................... 105!
If you were to give one piece of advice to a high school freshman, what would it be?
@williamsjohn ................................................................................................. 106!
If you had a very intelligent child entering college today, what major and language
skills would your recommend? @goldfo100 ....................................................... 106!
How can education be improved? @StealthAviator ............................................. 107!

PUBLIC SPEAKING ......................................................................108!

Im a groomsman in a large out of town wedding and was asked to make a roast at
the dinner. I hate public speaking. Whats your best advice? @Trader220 ........... 108!

Im acing your writing tips (thx!), but could you give us some tips on public speaking,
presentations, etc.? @linoxgill .......................................................................... 109!
How to find humor or be funny when doing a presentation? -@PriscillaPWood ...... 109!

HAPPINESS .................................................................................111!
What makes you genuinely happy? @Nisey7 ..................................................... 111!
Are there important things in life that if you care less about them you will be
happier? If so, what are those things for you? @jameskford............................... 111!

BEING HONEST ...........................................................................113!

Has revealing so much in your blog and books affected you negatively? - Oz W.-P.McK. III @wrgly ................................................................................................ 113!
How do you tell the truth w/o sounding like and a$$? @socialhotchoco............... 113!
What do you think of the phrase guilty pleasure and do you have any?
@JenShahade ................................................................................................... 114!
How do I make my unknown website popular? @ThePorchHound....................... 115!
Bluffing in business and love. Is it lying? Is it bad, ok, or a necessary evil?
@jhilderley ....................................................................................................... 116!

GETTING THINGS DONE .............................................................117!

How do you stop yourself from wasting time? It has become an addiction which leads
to frustration at the end of the day. @jaideepkhare ........................................... 117!
How do you organize an overwhelming amount of work? How do you make sure you
do what you have to do in a day/week? @flabastida .......................................... 118!
How do you make more hours in the day? @MrJNowlin ..................................... 119!
You seem to be a man of lists. Do you have a daily to do check list that you cross
things off or is it a more organic process? @iChmpneGrl .................................... 120!

SOCIAL AND GENERAL MEDIA ....................................................122!

Twitter or Facebook? - jennablan ....................................................................... 122!
Does Twitter make us worse writers or better writers overall? Do you think <140
characters is about right or would you prefer more? @JenShahade ..................... 122!
I just started a Linkedin ad campaign to jump start my network in a new city, any
other good ideas? @bgin2end .......................................................................... 123!
You dont read newspapers so how do you keep up with the news? @socialhotchoco
....................................................................................................................... 123!

Some people sleep walk. Others sleep eat or talk in their sleep. I apparently sleep
news. @jaltucher would be disappointed. @iamtiffani ........................................ 124!
Why do you always advise to ignore the media, yet regularly contribute to hype and
fear monger publications? @robtoole ................................................................ 125!
Whats the best (most responsible/useful) way to keep up-to-date on whats going on
in the world? @ryan_a_lane ............................................................................. 126!

HEALTH .......................................................................................127!
How much of being healthy has to do with being independently wealthy enough to
not sweat the small shit? @Andrew_Ferri .......................................................... 127!
Do you get a flu shot every year? @RichP ......................................................... 128!
After I fix myself, how do I find others who are also fixed? @kjepeneter ........... 128!

COMING UP WITH IDEAS ............................................................129!

Whats your technique for coming up with ideas? @JonasNielsen........................ 129!

BUSINESS IDEAS ........................................................................130!

In a business, is an idea the most valuable part of the creation? @greenjobseeker
....................................................................................................................... 130!
If you have an idea that the market isnt ready for, do you sit on it or build it out
anyway? @chrislopez....................................................................................... 130!

BUSINESS AND ENTREPRENEURSHIP, .......................................132!

Is it possible to start a business in this worldwide depression? ............................. 132!
How do you start a business when you have no money? how do you minimize risk of
losing everything @lakergod ............................................................................ 133!
Who is the biggest cheat on Wall Street? @Affinityps ......................................... 133!
Off the top of your head, what would you consider the best 3 entrepreneur books?
@codymort ....................................................................................................... 134!
Should one build a prototype or get a venture capitalist first? @wkarmistead ...... 135!
How can I start a business and sell it within two years while making lots of cash?
@jeredbare ...................................................................................................... 136!
Is being an tech entrepreneur in the midwest impossible? Do I have to move to the
coast? @kernicus ............................................................................................ 137!

Im a new business owner and we are off to a great start. What is the biggest
mistake a new business makes after initial success when looking to expand?
@ajwahls ......................................................................................................... 137!
I feel an overwhelming urge to start a business. I work as a manager at a gym. I
respect the owner a lot and he dangles the idea of me owning part of his next
gym. Should I view my boss as someone who I can talk to about my desire to be an
entrepreneur? @adampimentel ........................................................................ 138!
Quitting my enterprise consulting job after 7 years & starting my own company
(technology services based). Any advice? @RobbieAb ........................................ 139!
Build startup on the side slowly, or quit day job get funding and move faster?
@MrJNowlin ..................................................................................................... 140!
What are your thoughts on employee recognition (entrepreneurial or not) for a
company of ~190 employees? Gift cards, recognition in a newsletter, a lunch for
over-achieving employees?@andrealynn ........................................................... 140!
Who will be the next Steve Jobs? @bgin2end .................................................... 141!

WEALTH ......................................................................................143!
Whats more sane, an abundance or a scarcity mentality? I give money away because
I think therell be more- but Im not rich. Am I crazy? @lindsaycampbell ............... 143!

INVESTING ..................................................................................144!
Where does one begin is he/she wants to start investing? @Nisey7 .................... 144!
In Margin Call theres a quote: There are 3 ways to make a living: be first, be
smarter, or cheat. What do you think? @Candriawan ......................................... 145!
Is being risk adverse a pathological character flaw? @noahlz ........................... 145!
VC companies say ideas worth nothing, execution is worth everything, do you
agree with that? @kortessIgor ......................................................................... 148!

NEGOTIATION .............................................................................149!
Is there such thing as good, honest and fair negotiator? @socialhotchoco ........... 149!
Is it better to settle with someone with no integrity that wronged you in a business
dispute and pay x or fight it and potentially pay 5x in fees? @ajwahls ................. 149!

TRADING .....................................................................................150!
What advice would you give to someone like me who wants to trade for a living but
cant seem to get over fear of losing? @MzAprilShowers .................................... 150!

Am I a fool for continuing to invest in the stock market? Im self-employed and dont
know how to build a nest egg these days. @teashopgirl ..................................... 150!
Whats the next bubble? @Unpacktherat ........................................................... 151!
AMZN or AAPL?@ChicagoYak ........................................................................... 151!
What do you think is the outlook for the US market in the next six months? @artling
....................................................................................................................... 152!

THE ECONOMY ............................................................................153!

What makes you so optimistic about the economy? @billtheimpaler .................... 153!
If shit really hits the fan, what do you think is a good country for a young American
to move to? @M-Knopf .................................................................................... 155!
What are your thoughts on Greece? @jamesketchell .......................................... 156!
I know you dont think Greece is a big deal, but what about Italy? Big deal, maybe or
nothing?@wesbroxson ..................................................................................... 157!
Do you still believe the Dow might be up 8,000 points or more in the next several
years? @redwings924 ...................................................................................... 158!
Do you have any post on this topic:Bubbles, and how its different than the 1st dotcom? @eycsound ............................................................................................ 159!
How do you think in this bleak environ small financial services companies will survive?
Or how can they? @thefridayguy...................................................................... 160!

NETWORKING .............................................................................161!
I am in a wedding with a lot of high level executives. Should I network? @YoavEzer
....................................................................................................................... 161!
How to approach and connect with the #1 top notch people if youre young and
ambitious? @joTorsvik ..................................................................................... 161!
What is the best way to get the chance to pitch your product to big corporate
business? Just call up the CEO out of the blue? They dont care? @NickHarleyNZ 165!

SUPERPOWERS ...........................................................................167!
What power, if any do parents have to give to their children? Self-confidence?
@Pcostanzo ...................................................................................................... 167!
Batman or Spiderman? -@GonzaloGandia ........................................................... 167!
How do we gain more confidence and be sure on what we say? (In case people are
trying to bring us down) @Jas_Cheng............................................................... 168!

GOVERNMENT / POLITICS ..........................................................170!

Who will you vote for for President? - TschadErdstrm @TheSlycophant ............... 170!
What will it take for the GOP to accept tax hike on the rich? @ericmontas ........... 171!
Should the government control CEO bonuses? @SteathAviator ........................... 171!

ABOLISHING THE PRESIDENCY ..................................................173!

Are you running for President? If so, when you are elected, would you abolish
Congress and eventually the Presidency? @bgn2end ......................................... 173!
Who is your favorite president? @lakergodSK .................................................... 174!
What is the best form of goverment? @MarquesDeeClairMarc ............................ 175!
Any political predictions for 2012? @socialhotchoco ........................................... 175!

RELIGION, GOOD, EVIL...............................................................177!

Can you talk about morality? Is it universal or relative? @jonathankyou .............. 177!
How do you personally define morality? What is good? What is evil? @jmorgenstern
....................................................................................................................... 178!
How do you Find Ethics Without a religion? @jonathankyou .............................. 178!
What are your thoughts (if any) of the expanding Atheist movement i.e.: Sam Harris,
Richard Dawkins, etc.? @mczirjack ................................................................... 179!

CHARITY .....................................................................................181!
What are your views on how much charity one should give away, both annually and
life? @MarktMovr ............................................................................................ 181!
What do you think is the best way to give back to society as an individual?
@alyosha19 ...................................................................................................... 181!

POKER .........................................................................................183!
What did you learn from playing poker? @GiraffesCanSwim ............................... 183!

CHESS..........................................................................................188!
Who was better, Fischer or Kasparov? @StockSage1 ......................................... 188!

DRUGS .........................................................................................189!
Mood-altering drugs (a la depression meds, etc.) yay or nay? If nay then what?
@cseidholz ....................................................................................................... 189!

THE SELF HELP INDUSTRY ..........................................................190!

What is the most comical about the self-help industry? @steveroh...................... 190!
Any thoughts on Eckhart Tolle? @EricRomer ..................................................... 190!

WRITING .....................................................................................192!
How to get over Writers Block? - @markmccarthyUK ........................................... 192!
Where do you see yourself in 5 years? @ClarkCovington .................................... 194!
How do you find the time to write and exercise? @GlobalMacroZen ...................... 195!
@GlobalMacroZen then said: my schedule wont allow that. .............................. 195!
Is it possible that a small improvement can be too small? No. Improvements
compound exponentially and add up to great success over time. .......................... 195!
What are the most important factors in succeeding in financial journalism?
@dyer440......................................................................................................... 196!
How can a humor writer bleed? @idiotlaureate .................................................. 197!
Starting out as a writer, how much time should I budget daily to reasonably get
going? @Bmp135 ............................................................................................ 198!
What is your writing schedule? ........................................................................... 198!
Is the hardest part of writing a novel getting started? -@MichaelComeau .............. 199!

BLOGGING...................................................................................200!
Am I crazy to give away free plumbing advice on my blog? Will that sink my
company? @OconomowocPlumb ...................................................................... 200!
How do I pick a blog name? @rbinmn .............................................................. 201!
Is there one simple. common feature, one element you aim to achieve in every blog
post? @rajlikes................................................................................................ 201!
Thoughts on the anti-blog movement of authors using email services like MailChimp?
Direct to the inbox as they like to say @Unpacktherat ........................................ 202!
What should I blog about? I change my interests every day. @tfrojd .................. 202!

SELF-PUBLISHING ......................................................................204!
Do authors need to know about marketing? @ReadHeavily ................................ 204!
Where will e-books be 5 years from now? @eradke ........................................... 205!
What would you do if you meet Stephen Covey down a dark alley?
@IndustryKeyword............................................................................................ 206!

Do you ever struggle to simplify and structure complex ideas when writing books?
What steps do you go thru? @iAspin ................................................................ 207!
How do you make money selling an eBook while giving it away at the same time for
free with a special offer? @CLAcevedo222 ........................................................ 207!
Do 1 star reviews on Amazon affect your writing? And would you rather get a 1 star
review or a 3 star review? @BenNesvig............................................................. 208!
Is it possible for you to make a living from your self-published books?@ailon ...... 208!

IS IT TOO LATE? ..........................................................................210!

Is it too late to start all over at 47 and still make it big? @tombakalis ................. 210!

RETIREMENT ...............................................................................214!
How should one choose when to retire and where to live? @Elyiggy ................... 214!

CHARLIE SHEEN ..........................................................................215!

What are your thoughts about the scene from Wall Street when Charlie Sheen sits in
his apartment with beautiful girl and says life is great? @Julian_Lenz.................. 215!

OCCUPY WALL STREET ................................................................216!

What is your stance on Occupy Wall Street? @KarimGuessous ........................... 216!
Whats up with the Wall St. protestors and now that its gone global? What is their
objective? @StealthAviator............................................................................... 218!

THE DAILY PRACTICE .................................................................221!

Which of your daily practices is most important to your creativity? @JulioD ......... 221!
How many minutes each day do you meditate? @TodayTrader .......................... 222!
How does one become a faster decision maker while still maintaining the quality of
your decision?................................................................................................... 222!
What is the single most important thing to do today, right now, to move towards a
better world? @ReadHeavily ............................................................................ 223!
Is there such a thing as righteous anger? (Example, being outraged at Joe Paterno)
@Theopaulson .................................................................................................. 224!

JAMES FAVORITE THINGS .........................................................226!

What TV shows are you watching these days? @perfectweapon ......................... 226!
I read non-fiction voraciously but want to read some more fiction. What novels could
you recommend most highly? @importgenius .................................................... 226!

What are your top 3 favorite movies? -@authenticvoytek ..................................... 226!

What are your favorite self-help books? @YoavEzer ........................................... 227!
What is your favorite chapter in your last book? @ClaudiaYoga .......................... 228!

FAQ

ME

T O O ..................................................................231!

BUSINESS / ENTREPRENEURSHIP .............................................232!

Potential client that has shown interest in my product no longer returns my calls,
should I drive to him and see what's going on? @TheRakker .............................. 232!
Is it worth having a big client if you know they might be a pain to work with?
@BenDelphia .................................................................................................... 233!
What is your biggest advice in obtaining success as an entrepreneur?
@SerenaBlasing ................................................................................................ 234!
What kind of startup would get your attention - enough for you to talk about it?
@AnujAdhiya .................................................................................................... 237!
What's the best advice for a 24yr old entrepreneur? @BumperPickner ................ 239!
I've just started a website for a small photography business. What's are some good
ways to get traffic to the site? @pscols ............................................................. 241!
What is the biggest mistake entrepreneurs make? @LeonBenson2...................... 242!
How important is focusing on one business venture at a time? What about
entrepreneurship? @TiisetsoMaloma ................................................................. 244!
Did you start having networking lunches with wealthy people before or after u
became wealthy? Thanks! @tresaca ................................................................. 244!
As a startup, what's the fastest and easiest way to gain reputation with customers
aside from a great product? @dexteryz ............................................................. 245!
When you quit your job and focused on your business, did you still hate mondays?
@martefrain ..................................................................................................... 247!
How do you tell people who you think will never get funded that you think this is the
case? @vinaeco .............................................................................................. 249!

HEALTH .......................................................................................251!
Do you ever get sick? @jasontoheal ................................................................. 251!
So many Americans are so overweight... are they trying to become too big to fail?
@toddrockoff .................................................................................................... 251!
Do you consider marijuana a dangerous drug? @TheBJJMind ............................. 254!

You don't eat after 5pm - is this a form of intermittent fasting? What changes to your
diet, have you found beneficial and why? @Anna__Power .................................. 256!
Why and how did you stop drinking? .................................................................. 258!
How does one to be an early riser? Nothing has ever worked for me.
@JoshuaSheats................................................................................................. 258!

INVESTING ..................................................................................260!
What's your opinion on the easing of advertising restrictions on hedge funds? It's like
they're real businesses or something. @mattybgame ......................................... 260!
If you had $100 to invest in self-education every month, where would you allocate
the money? @BenNesvig ................................................................................. 260!
As a 28 y/o graduate student, given the neg real return in savings accounts, what
areas would u suggest investing in? @NotthatkindofDr ...................................... 261!
Your dow 40k call...what's that in "real" terms? @tpavlik ................................... 264!
What is your take on Jim Cramer? Genius investor or mostly got lucky, ie right place
right time? @MattKelmon .................................................................................. 265!
Did you ever blow a bunch of money in the forex market and decide never again like
Cramer? @CycleViewCharts ............................................................................. 266!
Facebook has an extremely uncertain future, with the outcome teetering from good
extremes to bad ones. How does it end? @JStuartTweets .................................. 267!
What industries/fields do you feel have the most growth potential in 5 year horizon?
@Vic5557 ....................................................................................................... 268!
Is the stock market "rigged"? I have heard floor traders called "Market Makers". Also
heard that everything involving $ is rigged @granthuhn ..................................... 269!

UNITED STATES OF AMERICA .....................................................271!

If you were born in another country would you move to US? @danieltoba........... 271!

VACATION / TRAVEL ...................................................................272!

What do you do when you know you need a vacation, but don't have the slightest
clue as to how to best spend the time? @thecrint .............................................. 272!

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT / LIFE ...............................................274!

What's the quickest way to become famous? @bhawks4life ............................... 274!
Was scammed by Tim Roberts of Savtira, lost small fortune 2 wks before their bogus
bankruptcy. Who do I turn to? DA, SEC, FBI? @TommyOphotos ........................ 275!

When trying to get what you want, how do you manage the tension between being
nice/rational/reasonable and a complete lunatic? @wkarmistead ........................ 276!
What are your thoughts on hunting...and in general being self sufficient w/ regards to
your food? @templec4 ..................................................................................... 276!
How do you get out of your own way and make things happen? @happyinspirit .. 277!
How do you advise someone to mentally cope with/ move past being unattractive,
hating permanent features of the way you look? @AtsalPeter ............................. 279!
Is cumulative/constant improvement the most important "thing" in life? @JT_Beck
....................................................................................................................... 281!
Do you have a support group you meet regularly? are you willing to come to ct to
meet one? would be honored ............................................................................. 282!
What is the key to persistence? I try the daily practice but cannot stay persistent and
flake off after a few days. @adnanp ................................................................. 283!
Is there a correlation between creativity and trying new things (visiting new places,
meeting different people, etc). @ivanhoff ......................................................... 283!
Interested in your take on advice to be yourself when seeking leadership roles/new
jobs. @taniahew ............................................................................................. 287!
How do you get past regret? I can't get past this and have been wasting more
compounding months and months. @JohnPearson555 ....................................... 288!
How to be more persuasive? @TheBJJMind ....................................................... 289!
How can you build your self esteem when you are confronted daily by people who's
opinions confirm your worst fears about yourself? @ciaranmurphyads ................ 290!
I don't know what to do in life and over what i am good. I lose interest in whatever i
do after some time. can you help me find? @alihb12 ......................................... 293!
Which self help gurus have helped you in your life and how? @EliSchostak ......... 294!
How important to you find it to have a clean/neat workspace? @joelclark22........ 295!
Love 'What Are You?' post. How do u avoid the #fuckitnothingreallymatters effect?
@EricRomer ..................................................................................................... 296!
Can you pinpoint an event that changed you into the person you are today? @holm
....................................................................................................................... 296!
You said you hit rock bottom many times. Does it get easier? Do you stop worrying
after a while? @martefrain ............................................................................... 297!

James, how do you deal with the stress of getting older and the feeling that the years
are flying by? @kevinkoskella ........................................................................... 299!
How to handle disappointing someone without burning the bridge? @arzvi ......... 301!
Whats the best way to become smarter? @DoronGreenspan .............................. 302!
How do you apologize to someone? @edzitron .................................................. 303!
How do you deal with feeling like shit no matter what you do or how fortunate you
are? @LeonBenson2 ........................................................................................ 304!
Sometimes I get that not so fresh feeling. @TrdrFlridaEvans .............................. 305!

PERSONAL WEALTH ....................................................................307!

What is the quickest way to make a million? @runwayfashionUK ........................ 307!

BOOKS / READING ......................................................................309!

What percentage of your monthly reading is non-fiction and what drives the direction
of that reading? @bozwood ............................................................................. 309!
Is it best to just read what is interesting and let the ideas percolate from there?
@bozwood ....................................................................................................... 312!
What is your favorite book about chess? @MainStInvesting ................................ 313!
What book have you reread the most? @BenNesvig .......................................... 314!

NETWORKING .............................................................................316!
What's the best way to network at an event where you don't know anyone?
@BenDelphia .................................................................................................... 316!

LOVE, SPECIAL SOMEONE, RELATIONSHIPS ..............................317!

How should a single person find someone? Pitfalls to avoid? @thecrint ............... 317!
My wife cheated. I played detective, saw the phone bills, followed her, found out. She
confessed and said it wouldn't happen again but I can't get over it. What do I do?
from an email ................................................................................................... 318!
What is the glue that brings/keeps two people together in a relationship/marriage?
Tangibles please! @thecrint ............................................................................. 320!
If ex said I was amazing but not ready to feel that strongly this soon and he wants to
date others, doesn't that just mean he's not into me? @asplenia ........................ 321!
What can be done to restore the consideration needed to keep a relationship healthy,
once it has been lost? @thecrint ....................................................................... 321!
What are some best practices for getting over a lost love? @lloydhtaylor ............ 322!

Honesty and women. What's your experience? Does that superpower scare them?
Attract? Something else? @bkharnish ............................................................... 324!

SADNESS / HAPPINESS ..............................................................326!

I have an incredible sadness that often can be quite overwhelming in my life. Does
that ever go away? I'm really scared it won't. I'm not depressed, because generally
I'm happy enough- its when the emotions are just overwhelming, the loneliness etc.
blah blah blah- the usual things that break us all apart. So, does it go away? (From
an email) .......................................................................................................... 326!
Doesn't being happy and thwarting your want for things impact ambition?
@PratPreneur ................................................................................................... 328!

SOCIAL NETWORK ......................................................................329!

What would the popular social network of 2020 look like? @Jarmoney ................ 329!

RETIREMENT ...............................................................................331!
It seems like ever since you're born life is all about working getting promotion etc.
But what's life after retirement? It seems lifeless. @martefrain ........................... 331!

IDEAS ..........................................................................................333!
When you generate ideas everyday, do you stick to a particular area (i.e. your current
projects) or are you all over the map? @richcollins ............................................ 333!
Realized I have no idea what I'm working towards with my life. What are you
ultimately working towards? How did you figure it out? @lewisquartey ............... 334!
Do u believe you, or anyone, can ever have a truly original thought or is everything
simply a derivative off past ideas/thoughts? @FreeMarketsFan ........................... 337!
Best way to give away ideas per your suggestion? @NickBFernando ................... 337!

BLOG / WRITING ........................................................................339!

How do you get NEW inspiration for your blog? I try to bleed on my blog, but some
days, inspiration is gone... @RobinHeinen1986.................................................. 339!
If one is 100% honest in his writing, good chance you'll piss off your significant other
occasionally if not often. What to do? @aarongoldfarb ....................................... 341!
What were some of the simple ways you started to get traction for your blog early
on? Im starting with consistent content. @AlexBDavis ....................................... 342!
You write a lot about your children. Do they read those posts? What do they think?
@kcastagnaro ................................................................................................... 343!

Good idea or bad idea to read comments on my blog posts that get syndicated
elsewhere? @BenNesvig .................................................................................. 344!
What are your top 3 tips for narrative writing? @Mandizzleno1 ........................... 345!
I just found your blog. I appreciate the honesty. It seems like you struggle with your
own advice, does it ever get easier? @EdgeFoley .............................................. 346!
How much or little does ego play a role in your blogging? What about your thoughts
on ego and blogging in general? @JenMaidenberg............................................. 347!

CAREER .......................................................................................349!
What advice can you give to someone in their 30's who wants to begin a career in
trading, but doesn't know where to start? @DB0pink ......................................... 349!
How does one market himself well inside a company to move up the career ladder?
@WolfgangBremer ............................................................................................ 350!
Riskiest but most fulfilling job? I would say self-employed, do you agree?
@natedogreimer ............................................................................................... 353!
Would you ever go into a career knowing you had a very low chance of success? How
would you prepare for it financially? @michaeltefula .......................................... 354!
Is it creepy or overbearing for someone looking for a job to send a FB message to the
CEO's inbox. It's a social media savvy company. @coilsANDcurls ........................ 357!

ECONOMY ....................................................................................358!
What opportunities ahead in a double-digit inflation economy? @Agipanama ....... 358!
Paul Krugman a brilliant economist, or whiny elitist? @eddtorial ......................... 359!
If you had an unlimited budget of time, money and manpower, how would you end
poverty and war? @jphoenix24 .......................................................................... 360!
Got a post card about a class action lawsuit against Bank of America entitling me to
$, what are the odds I'll ever get a check? @charliehay ..................................... 361!

POLITICS.....................................................................................362!
Kinda depressed about upcoming elections. Will be Bama-Redux or Dark Scary Mitt
@Kitsune808 .................................................................................................... 362!

FAILURE ......................................................................................363!
How do you get comfortable with failure? @JoelEnglander ................................. 363!
How do I find balance between bleeding on page and revealing too much/showing
weakness? Will admitting my failures help/hurt business? @anti_nihilist .............. 365!

SUCCESS .....................................................................................366!
Do all successful people have high levels of energy? If so, is it innate? -@mtgentry81
....................................................................................................................... 366!
How do I explain to my parents that a grad degree doesn't equal success? I'm 22,
150k in debt scares me. @Rothbard_Fan .......................................................... 367!

INFORMATION ............................................................................370!
Estimating over 50% of the "information" coming my way to be... tenuous, how
should I change my information gathering? @FredrikFiltered .............................. 370!

FAMILY ........................................................................................372!
How / when did you know you were ready for kids? @iamadamtanner................ 372!
You've chronicled your experiences as a father, what is your top-ten list when
expecting? @Andrew_Ferri............................................................................... 372!
How do you apply pacifism to being a father. My nephew lied to me. And what good
does it do him to just let it go? @bkharnish....................................................... 374!

GOD .............................................................................................375!
Do you believe in God? If so, which? @robbielaney ........................................... 375!

MOTIVATION / SELF-PROMOTION .............................................376!

Best way to get motivated? @DoronGreenspan ................................................. 376!
What has been your most effective method of self-promotion? -@davidrowyn ....... 378!

CHESS..........................................................................................381!
Has chess taught you more relevant things than school? More worth the HUGE time
investment you've put into both? @bell_er ........................................................ 381!

TWITTER Q&A .............................................................................383!

Biggest benefit from doing twitter Q + A's? ideas for writing, fun interacting with
readers, helps to build audience, other? -@BillyMurph ......................................... 383!
Any good methods for building twitter followers and interacting with people?
@adamkornfield ................................................................................................ 383!
What moves you to do this Q&A? Do you expect to retrieve some info? Just
interaction? @danibluebishop ........................................................................... 384!

Connect With James @Jaltucher .................................................385!

INTRODUCTION TO FAQ ME AND

FAQ ME TOO
THE ULTIMATE REVISED FAQ ME
Since 2010 I have been doing a Twitter Q&A every Thursday from 3:30 PM to 4:30 PM.
Let me do a little FAQ (frequently asked questions) about this Q&A I do.
What questions do people ask me?
Originally people were asking me about entrepreneurship.
But then they started asking me about anything: startups, finance, stress, fear, anger,
relationships, partnerships, marriage, divorce, motivation, productivity and many other
things.
Why was I doing it?
I really loved doing it. It gave me great joy, which is a good enough reason to do things
some times. I always told people that I was never giving advice. That the only replies I
would give were things that had worked for me personally and people should try their
own ideas.
Nevertheless, every week the Q&A got more and more questions. Even Twitter was
cutting me off because I was responding to too many things in an hour.
Why was I qualified?
I'm not really. But nobody is. I never like those articles "10 Steps to Be a Great BLAH
BLAH"
Nobody is born on a pedestal. We all learn from our hard moments.

How we deal with the hardest moments in our lives is what ultimately defines our
character going forward.
I've run businesses. I've failed at many of them. Like anybody, I've gone through a lot
with relationships. I've written 15 books. I've run hedge funds and I've done a lot of
investing. Some has worked out. Some hasn't. And on and on.
Why Are the Answers in This Book Bigger than 140 Characters
In the Twitter Q&A my answers were limited to 140 characters.
Every weekend I would then expand on them to give much fuller answers.
In 2012 I had enough material for a book I called FAQ ME.
Since then I've gathered other questions I've answered and expanded on them.
I never put it into a book until now.
Here is the full-expanded revised FAQ ME, together with the FAQ ME TOO never
published before anywhere else. I hope they are helpful to you.
And obviously, if you have any more questions to me, I am always happy if you ask.

PURPOSE OF LIFE
What do you think is the purpose of life? @adriennetran
Somewhere in the middle of have everything you want and to want nothing lays
purpose.
We have to feed our families, we have to be responsible, so we cant just hide in a cave
(i.e. want nothing) but at some point we need to have room to develop the soul.
So if we get everything we want, but we want as little as possible, somewhere in that
spectrum lays our true purpose to be found.
I try every day to throw things out. Ive accumulated a lot in the past 40 years. I try to
simplify. I also try to simplify my relationships. Attend fewer meetings. Learn more
during the extra quiet periods I have. By doing this I can learn more about what my
passions might be, how to pursue them, how to enjoy them. Or worse cast, I avoid
being around people and situations that dissuade me from purpose.
On a grander scale, I think all purpose is spiritual in nature. Not spiritual in a religious
sense. But in something else. All of the atoms in my body were ultimately created in
the Big Bang. All information in my brain comes from events that happened after that
one moment. I think ultimate purpose is connecting with those gaps in between the
atoms, in between those units of micro-information that may have existed before the
first moments of the Universe.
I know that sounds a little crazy. But if I believe anything at all, I believe that thats
possible.

What do you do when things keep getting worse?

Around the summer of 2000 I lost a lot of money. About a million dollars a week in
cash. This may seem like, ok, at least he had that money and he mustve stopped
before he went to zero. But i went to zero. And the worst part is finding the strength
to continue going. Staring at the screen, mumbling about fate, all of those stupid

decisions, suddenly all the cruelty and malice in the world that had been storing up just
for me was unleashed for the first time in my thirty years of life and it wouldnt let me
go.
I went from having more money than I knew what to do with to having zero. I couldve
given money to charity. I couldve set up my kids for life. I couldve used the money to
help my father when he was sick. I couldve saved his life. I couldve saved my life.
I couldve saved myself from losing my apartment. I couldve saved myself from so
many sleepless nights. I never slept. At most, two hours in a stretch. And I would drink
every night. I would sit snug in this giant couch inside this giant apartment in the dark
thinking, how stupid was I? I made money when it was easy and then I lost it all. Now
Im never going to make it back again and my kids and everyone else around me will
suffer. Ive done bad things to people and this was karma. Ive squandered all the good
will I created as a kid.
I honestly thought that the success I had was generated as a combination of luck and
because I spent many years meditating as a kid. I thought that I had built up some
karmic warchest and I used it to generate enough money to dominate the world and
then I squandered it. Now I was gone. But I couldnt kill myself because I had two kids
to pay for. I had to make sure they were ok.
I went to therapists, astrologers, psychics, zen teachers, zen therapists. One psychic
said I needed to find a coconut TODAY and smash into the street. At 10pm one night I
decided to do it. I had two problems: where to get the coconut at 10Pm and how to
find an empty street in Manhattan to smash it.
I went out and around the corner where there was a Thai restaurant. I figured they
must have a coconut. They didnt really understand me. Finally one waiter did. He
started speaking in Thai to a woman who I assumed was his mother. No coconut, she
said, but she wrote down an address where I could find one.
Behind me, James, what are you doing here?
It was Flash. I had been playing chess with him for 15 years in Washington Square
Park. I didnt know this but apparently at night the entire Washington Square Park
crowd moved to this Thai restaurant on the corner of Reade and Church, a few blocks
from the World Trade Center. Flash owed me money but I knew I would never collect
it.

Instead I played chess for a few hours. JP was there also. Why are you out right
now? I said, I have to find a coconut and smash it into the street. He laughed and
said, I knew it. There must be a woman involved. And we all laughed and played
chess. A small respite for me in a five year period of non-stop pain and agony.
Then I went to the address the woman gave me. It was a basement store in the lower
east side that was still open at 11pm. I told them I needed a coconut. A guy came back
with this hairy round brown thing. I bought it. Then I wandered up and down
Washington Street until I was sure nobody was looking. I threw down the coconut as
hard as I could. It smashed everywhere, the milk splattering my pants and everything
around.
Things are going to change now, I thought. Sort of like that line from the Beck song,
Loser: things are going to change. I can feel it.
Things did change. I lost my job as a venture capitalist. That job was at least paying my
mortgage. I got kicked off the board of a company I started. Selling that company was
my last hope. I was too demoralized to stop it or to start anything new. I would lie
around, unable to get myself back up and start generating new ideas.
I tried to get a loan. Nobody would lend to me. Not even when I paraded two little
babies to the bank. Banks have rules, you know. No lending to degenerates. At least
not yet. That was years later when banks would lend to anyone.
Every month Id go to the ATM machine and Id have this feeling like someone was
stabbing me all over my body and mind when I looked at how much was left in the
account. Id yell at my now ex-wife as if it were her fault, How are we supposed to live
on this. We are GOING TO ZERO!
And because I kept saying it over and over, the reality was created and we did go to
zero. The Law of Attraction works in reverse much more than it works in a positive
way.
Then 9/11 happened. I hate talking about 9/11. So many people had it far worse than
me on that day. Far, far, worse. I was standing on Church Street when the first plane
flew overhead. Dan said to me, Is the President coming into town today? because the
plane was so low. It was right over us. Even though it was actually about 600 feet

higher, everyone on the street felt they had to duck because we had never seen a
plane that low coming in so fast and we all watched it go into the building.
After that there was no way I could sell my apartment, with the mortgage each month
that was crushing me. The week after 9/11 I decided to be brave and buy the stock
market as it opened. This is how I went to zero. I lost basically whatever I had left. I
finally couldnt take it anymore. On Friday of that week at around 10:30 I had to sell
everything. I was screaming at my broker on the phone, Im going to go broke! And
he sold whatever I had left. Scraps that I knew I could use to pay my mortgage a few
months more. Starting around a minute later the stock market went on a run upwards
that lasted at least three months. If I had held on for at least 5 more hours I wouldve
doubled my money on the week. If I had held on for 3 more months I wouldve had
more money than ever. Instead I was broke.
It took another year to sell. I started missing payments. I couldnt afford diapers. I got
shit all over my head.
Nobody would return my calls. I asked my neighbor if a bank or a hedge fund would
hire me. He said: Typically you have to have a track record thats good. And I was too
ashamed to ask him more. I actually had no skills I could think of that could pay my
expenses. Dot-com entrepreneurs were a dime a dozen and everyone was broke after
the bust. No bankers or VCs would return my phone calls. There was nobody for me to
sue. It was all my fault and Im not a litigious person anyway.
One time I called my parents. I needed to borrow $1000. Thats all. After having
millions. It was 14 months after 9/11. I finally had sold my place but the deal had not
yet closed and I had no money. I needed money to move. To live.
They began to yell at me. They didnt want to lend me the money. I hung up the
phone. I didnt talk to them for six months. Then my dad had a stroke and thats the
next time I talked to them, although he never woke up from his stroke again. So the
last time I spoke to him I had hung up on him.
Everyone says that things cycle or what goes down, goes up. But thats not true. My
dad was in his stroke-coma for three years. He never got better. He got steadily worse
and worse. They would drop his body on the floor when moving him from one
institution to the next. He had bed sores so bad you could see through to the skeleton.
My family thought I didnt visit him enough. But I was scared and didnt want to be
even more depressed and I had my own two kids to take care of.

I stayed in my new house all the time, about sixty miles north of the city. I gained
about 20 lbs because I was no longer pacing the streets of Manhattan at all hours of
the night and there was blizzard after blizzard where I lived. I was in exile and I had no
idea what would happen. For the first year after I moved into town I didnt speak with
anyone. I didnt want to. This was only temporary, I thought.
The worst part was trying to find the strength to continue. So my projects turned to
zero. What was the point. Day after day. All the music I had danced to just a few years
earlier was now silenced. The jukebox was broken. The dance hall was closed. Every
night I woke up in dread, terrified of yet one more insecure tomorrow. I wasnt even
brave enough to kill myself. And the truth was only leading me closer to a death agony.
The agony that youth was gone, and for the rest of my tomorrows I was finished,
through, crushed by my responsibilities and the carved out hole of loss inside of me.
I went into one store and asked the woman behind the counter, is it just me or does
the entire world seem like its depressed, as if people cant shake the utter sadness of
just being alive? She looked at me and said, Do you know anything about computers?
I cant get my computer to work.
A close relative of mine wrote me, You werent even as good as your father. He never
wouldve lost a house that his children loved and been such a disappointment like you
were. The few times I would venture into the city I couldnt think of a single friend or
family member I could call that I could spend time with and who would want to see me
and wed all be happy and just enjoy. I had nothing and nobody. And Im not blaming
them. It was all my fault.
Im still afraid of slipping back into that crevice. The Earth shakes every few years.
2008, for instance. Cracks in the Earth open. Bridges that were secure for 50 years
break and cars fall into the water. Once youve seen the darkness in the center of the
Earth, the heat that can burn your brain to cinders, you know its always there, an open
invitation to come back to it. I knew too much, but not enough to ever come back.
Once the bridge cracks, the car is already doomed.
I can tell you it all came back. I can say, thats why Im writing this. I can say, dont
worry, things do cycle if you picture it and let it. But things dont always come back.
Sometimes things get worse and worse.

The important thing is that right around the middle of all of this, I started planting
seeds. The abominable pressure of being forced to live, forced me to plant tiny seeds.
Life goes on, the future is a joke, but we can never forget it exists and its hungry and
its waiting to eat and destroy us so we must have food to give it. I was planting a
garden. You pull up weeds. You dig out the dirt. You put seeds in, you lay excrement
over it. Some plants get eaten up by ravenous birds. But some seeds are left alone and,
if cared for, are allowed to blossom. Thats why Im still alive. Because of the seeds
planted. In retrospect I wish I had planted more of them but its ok.
I planted new seeds every day. I still do.
Maybe I can also lie to myself and say I am a better person for having been through
things. Maybe I came through the other side and there was more light on this side than
the side I started on. I dont know. I hope so. Some seeds I planted ten years ago are
still growing. Still need to be harvested.
The key is to plant the seeds. And never stop, even if weather, even if animals, even if
mutations, look as if they are going to damage the garden and destroy it. Seeds take
time to grow. A long time. And they need to be loved with patience, just like children.
And there are seeds designed for every season. The key is to go out there, dig up dirt,
and plant. Every day.
You dont know what the final outcome might be. What the DNA of each seed holds for
your garden. But over time, over years, over a lifetime, the garden turns lush there
are colors, there is food to eat, there are perennials that, like old friends, always return
every year when the cold is over. You can never ever stop planting the seeds. Every
day. Eventually there is a thick patch of joy where there was once nothing but dirt,
weeds, and mud.
And you can look at it and finally say, This is me. I did this. What seed will you plant
today?

DATING
What are your feelings concerning online dating? Would you treat
it like a new business, considering the interactions? @jeehtoven
To make online dating work for you, you have to treat it as a fulltime job. Every
evening, if I was not out on a date, I was signing up for online dating services, I was
sending or responding to over 20 emails a night. I was making phone calls (after
chatting through the service sometimes people want to hear you on the phone to
make sure theres not a wife standing right there).
I became so proficient about the good and bad features that I started my own online
dating service called 140love.com. Unfortunately, that venture did not work. The basic
idea was that not only would you get matched to someone but you could quickly decide
if you liked their personality based on their profiles as well as their tweets.
The problem with the service was that many Twitter accounts are not anonymous.
Nobody wanted to sign up for a non-anonymous online dating site.
So I was online 3-4 hours a night sending out messages to profiles I liked. I spent an
hour filling out the eHarmony form and only at the end they told me I wasnt qualified
(Our research shows that people who are separated usually do not have relationships
that work out.)
I cut losses very quickly. If a conversation started that I felt was going nowhere, I
stopped it. If a date happened and I sensed it was not going to work out, I cut it short
and that was that. Even if I felt like things could move forward, if I didnt think it would
end in a long-term relationship, I stopped it.
I had very clear goals. I wanted to fall in love. I wanted someone to fall in love with
me. I didnt want any games where we had to pretend to not love each other while we
slowly eased into it. I work pretty fast. I wasnt a believer in the Rules and whenever
I felt I was being sucked into that game, I would back out.
Nor did I lead anyone on. For me, there was no point in just going on dates if I knew
the relationship was not going to be long-term. Everything you do in life, good or bad,

has consequences. The most obvious consequence of having sex with someone you
dont want to have a long-term relationship with is that you could hurt that persons
feelings AND, that couldve been the night you would have met the love of your life if
only you had been home sending messages out.
The one thing I will say is: get used to tons of rejection. Maybe 10:1 on rejections no
matter how good you are (unless you are a beautiful woman, then the ratio is probably
reverse).
For me it was work. Every day sending messages. Every day trying different services.
And then the actual dates. I made the mistake of arranging dinners with everyone.
Claudia, who became my wife, had a better method. I met her through an online dating
service.
On her profile she said she was from Buenos Aires. I wrote her a first message saying,
I always wanted to visit Brazil.
She wrote back saying, Thats great but Buenos Aires is in Argentina. So I thought I
blew it. But she suggested meeting for a cup of tea. I pushed for dinner. Who knew
what could happen?
No, she said. Tea. She had it right. A tea could be just fifteen minutes. A dinner is
two hours and two hundred dollars (at least the way I was drinking back then it was).
And so we met for tea. And now were married.

Do you have any dating advice for introverts? @dylanized

Yes. If you spend even one night at home, you are in trouble. As Gretzky says, skate
to where the puck is going, not where its at.
So go to tango classes. Go to yoga. Go to cooking classes. Join book clubs. Dont
think youll go to one tango class and meet the love of your life. All of these things are
seeds that you plant. Some of the seeds will grow, some will not.
If you find yourself with free time after this, sign up for every dating service. Send out
twenty notes a day. Vary them up. Make them funny, clever. I would do it for you but I
would have to charge. I was a dating service expert. I used all of them.

And remember that you have to handle rejection, lots of it. But even a rejection is a
seed planted. It builds strength in you and gets the word out: you are looking, you are
available.
Most importantly, go to all the places where there are more women than men. Believe
me! Women want to meet you just as much as you want to meet them. And they love
introverts.
Look at me! Im hideous. But I worked it, and it worked.

I want a relationship with someone who is actually like me. So

what is the next step? I'm in school until summer next year,
which means I can't go anywhere. spekkhogger123
Okay, let me ask you a couple of questions:
A)
B)
C)
D)
E)
Like
F)

Can you join a church choir?

Are there any tango classes in a 30 mile radius?
There are definitely yoga or Pilates classes
Go to the library and see if there are any book groups you can join
Are there any 12-step meetings in your area? (they are not as bad as you think).
"business owners debtors anonymous" for instance?
Cooking classes?

And so on.
Find what classes or groups are in a 30 mile radius that, statistically speaking, are made
up of mostly women. That's the next step.
The step after that is going to one of those things.
Note to self: idea for business: search engine that will tell me within 30 miles of me
where all the classes are that have a 10:1 female to male ratio.

At what moment did you know you were in love? Did you have a
Shazam moment!?! @martycos
Im a first date fall-in-love kind of guy. So after our first date with Claudia we sat down
on a bench in Tompkins Square Park and said nothing. I didnt feel awkward about it.
Thats when I knew I was in love. No Shazam moment. I knew I could be comfortable
with this person. [See, How I Met Claudia http://bit.ly/mDC2uD]. It was such a relief
from all the other experiences I had been having.

How do you know if you are in love or just limerice?

@RolandBarat
This is another way of saying you dont know right now. You just met the girl. Youre
having sex. You love her unique smile unique from every other smile youve ever
been given. She gets you to do things you never thought about doing before. She gets
you to laugh. She gets you to daydream about what life would be like with her, and you
hate the thought of life without her.
I get it. Weve all been there. Done that.
And then it doesnt work out.
Thats okay. Most things dont work out.
But were not in tomorrow.
Always ask yourself: What am I going to do today. Today is the only day that matters.
Do you want to love her today? Then go for it.
And then, if 30 years from now, when she is sick and you are legitimately feeling bad
and doing everything you can to make sure she feels better then you know you love
her. Dont think too hard about 30 years from now. Enjoy today.

Suppose youve gone on three or four dates with a girl, do you

ever ask her: Where do we stand? @eugenephoto
Therere several things I dont know here:
How good are you at reading emotional cues? Where are you going, what are you
doing on these dates?
For instance, is she afraid to say no when you ask her on another date? Is she
delaying or postponing dates? There are lots of clues that you probably have gathered
by this moment.
But, I will tell you this. There is no need to ask her if you are on the fifth date. By the
fifth date, you two know enough about each other. At the end of the date, simply move
in for the kiss. You will know very quickly where you stand, or sleep, that night.

How do I improve my social game? Meeting new people, potential

love interests, etc. @randyaaron
Instead of constantly boring people with my own story Im going to steal from my wife
Claudias story. In February 2009 she was out of a job, was going to lose her house,
run out of money and then what? Maybe move back to Argentina for the first time in
15 years?
No. She decided to up her social game. Meet more people. She signed up tango
classes, painting classes, I wish she had taken a goddamned cooking class, she went to
Spanish-speaking meetups, she signed up for dating services, she went to yoga classes
every day, she asked all her friends who should she be meeting and got good advice
(advice that ultimately led her to me!).
She was honest about what she wanted. She cut losses quickly. She wouldnt waste
time on dinners (our first date was a tea date and nothing more). She kept disciplined
and didnt chase after intrigue and false hopes. But she kept expanding her list of
things to do so that her social network would expand.
Again, as the network gets bigger (in whatever you do: social life, business life,
journalist life, etc.) the value goes up exponentially. And it worked for her. Now were
married! So:

A)
Picture the people you want to be around, and then make sure every day you get
closer and closer to where they are.
B)
Be honest about what you want and who you are. While, of course, always being
polite, dont sacrifice your soul for meaningless and fleeting rewards.

Words of advice someone said to you that changed your life?

@adriennetran
I had a real hard time with this at first. Most of the people who have mentored me I
ultimately got distanced from for a variety of reasons. [See, "The Worst Boss I've Ever
Had" http://bit.ly/oS8lYT]
But heres a couple of things that people have said to me that I have not forgotten:
Try to improve every day (Jim Cramer told me that one http://bit.ly/hOrF87)
Focus on today only (Claudia told me that one when I was worrying about a
hypothetical event that could happen two years from now)
Im only worried about whats in my pocket, not whats in your pocket (a good way to
focus on your own needs and finances and not be obsessed with the mythical Jones
family we always try to keep up with. Yitz told me that one http://bit.ly/lvBeW2)
Always be honest (my dad taught me that one, the hard way http://bit.ly/qNWbHD)
Unfortunately, most other things Ive had to learn on my own.

How do I end relationships (personal, business, etc.)?

@chucklecoq
I can only answer by counter example. I have never ended a relationship of any sort
well.
The last business relationship I ended I basically had a job as a partner at a private
equity firm. I decided for no specific reason other than a general discomfort that I
didnt want to be there. So I just walked out mid-meeting. Left all my stuff there. Never

returned calls or emails and never went back to the office. They might still have my
name on the website. I dont even know.
Very bad!
Same thing with relationships. My basic technique: Move to a new city. Very bad.
I wish I could follow my advice on this one. And I hope to do so in the future. So take it
for what its worth (i.e. I havent been able to follow my own advice).
HONESTY. Be up front that you are unhappy and want to leave and its not really open
for discussion.
LOVE. Be sincere that you wish the best for the person. Even if you feel betrayed or
angry in some way. Betrayal and anger will become part of ancient history after a short
while.
If you dont end things in those two ways I know from very personal experience that
there are only horrible, horrible consequences. We only have a short time on this
planet. Goal #2 is to avoid horrible consequences to any of your actions.

What is the best way to meet new people? Im quite

introverted/shy but I do have a (very) tiny circle of (close)
friends. @binarymac
Good! You solved the first problem: having a tiny circle of close friends. Now, do one of
the following:
ORGANIZE A DINNER CLUB. Everyone in your circle cooks for the others (do this one
day every week or so). You rotate through the circle. The one challenge: everyone has
to invite others to the dinner that nobody else knows.
ANOTHER TECHNIQUE: GUY OR GIRL: TAKE DANCE LESSONS. Preferably tango
classes. Your bodies close, you rotate through the other people in the class, you talk
before and after, and over time you plan tango outings, etc. This works. Ditto for
cooking.
WHAT ARE YOUR INTERESTS? When I first moved to New York City I had one interest:

chess. So I went to Washington Square Park and played everyone who sat around there
playing all day. Next thing I knew, I was living with them (although not in the homeless
shelter where half of them lived at).
12 STEP PROGRAMS: Theres a 12 step program for everyone. Heres my experience
with them http://bit.ly/fWS54A:You have a room full of people who have hit bottom in
one way or the other and need to commune with others to get over it. Many of them
have short skirts, pretty faces, and dramatic problems. What better way to meet
people?

DRINKING
Why did you quit drinking? - @robin_ahn
Alcohol was great for reducing inhibitions so I could be more comfortable, for instance,
on a date. Theres no question that is a positive on alcohol. But then, as I continued
drinking within my dating process I realized that bad things were happening. Very bad
things. Here are some of the negatives:
SICK. I was getting sick more often. Including the flu.
I WAS GETTING LESS SLEEP. Probably for two reasons: Drinking alcohol happens at
night so thats one strike against sleep. Also, alcohol has lots of sugar so Id fall asleep
and then pop awake at 3 in the morning and wouldnt be able to get back to sleep.
Even one glass of wine does that to me.

I WAS GAINING WEIGHT. For my entire life I was my college weight. And
suddenlyI was 15 pounds more! This was after a three month period of drinking every
night. I had a gut! So I had to stop.
I WAS BECOMING A LOVE ADDICT. I wouldnt always understand the emotional cues of
the people around me, a skill I always thought I was good at. I think alcohol was
making me put attributes on people that they didnt have but that I wanted them to
have. One addiction leads to another. And love is a painful addiction to have.
So I stopped. And that cleared the way for many good things to happen in my life.
These days I find that I can simulate the effect of alcohol by slightly slurring my words
when I need those reduced inhibitions. That hypnotizes my body into thinking it is
drinking. I mention this in 11 Unusual Ways to Be a Better Public Speaker
http://bit.ly/jFlvrL.

LOVE
Is love, marriage, children, and all of that just a waste of time and
money in the end? @jaisondm
I did not want to have children. (See, Is it Bad I wanted my First Kid to be Aborted?
http://bit.ly/g4a30s) I was terrified about it. I thought marriage, children, and love
would reduce my time for other pursuits and reduce my chances of success and
happiness.
And I was right. Sort of. I did get divorced. And raising children is very hard. Im not
really that great at it although I try http://bit.ly/oLhh1v.
But, that said, I dont think the answer is renunciation of these things. Quite the
opposite. The renunciates have it easy. They choose not to go through the pain so that
life and salvation can be easier for them.
But there are no greater gurus than your children. There is no greater teacher of
emotions then learning to live with someone. There is no greater poet to soothe your
passions than the person you fall in love with. I wouldnt trade any of my bad
experiences in these areas for anything. Probably love and children have cost me my
money and my life many times over. But Im still alive. And better for it.

What are the statistics of men cheating more than once?

@LynnHasselbrgr
I dont know the exact statistics but my gut tells me if a man cheats once, hes going to
cheat twice. I once read a story about a person who would fire anyone who cheated on
his wife because if he can cheat on his wife, he can cheat me. People cheat for many
reasons: that they might not be happy in their marriage is only one of them. In which
case, they should end their marriage.
However, a big reason men cheat is that they are addicts. They love the chase, theyre
insecure and need that chase, and then acceptance of the invitation to sex, to feel alive
again. This might be a reaction not to the marriage but to any number of things that

have happened since childhood.

So how do you treat an addiction? Can a person actually change? One possible solution
is to go to a 12-step plan like Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA).
I know many people who have successfully been able to go to SLAA and get over their
love or sex addictions. But you have to treat it like you would treat any other illness.
You cannot just say, no more cheating, because that will do nothing to solve the
underlying causes of what happened.
One other statistic that I heard that may or may not be true: if a man cheats and then
moves in with his new girlfriend there is a 95% chance it will not work out. Again, who
knows? Nevertheless sometimes statistics are useful ledges to hang onto.

What do you do when someone you love is very depressed/or

sad? @Unpacktherat
Most important: know that you cannot solve their problems. When people are
depressed they are like an onion. The topmost skin is the OFFICIAL REASON they are
depressed. Maybe someone didnt return a call or someone at work said something
about then. However, if all you do is respond to (eat) that skin, it wont taste very good
and it wont help anyone.
One layer down might be they are feeling shame over what that person said about
them, or feelings of insecurity on why this person didnt call them back. The nameless
person who is supposed to call back might not even know he or she has been placed
on such an aggressive timeline. But the insecurity in your friend is there and is real.
That is the next layer.
One further layer down, as we continue peeling this beautiful onion (since onions and
garlic basically add positively to almost any food you can imagine except for maybe
vanilla milkshakes), might be events that happened thirty years ago that began to
trigger these insecurities.
And even a further layer down, the insecurities and shame might be triggered by events
that happened 100 years ago to ancestors of your friend.

How are you going to solve these problems? How is your friend even going to do so? It
is too difficult!
Neither of you can solve them. Therapists think they can by TALKING ABOUT THE PARENTS,
perhaps, but the problems might even go deeper. The things making your friend sad
are insurmountable if you try to tackle them directly.
What you can do is listen. That is all you do. Let your friend talk. Then she knows she
has someone who will listen to her. That makes her happy. Makes her feel loved. Listen
to and love your friend.
This way you cant solve the problems but you can redirect.
Did she exercise today? That always releases hormones that counteract sadness. Is she
sleeping okay? Is she eating okay? If she is feeling bloated and weighed down to the
Earth she will be more sad than if she feels like she is flowing properly.
Then, I would slightly redirect in the direction of the DAILY PRACTICE http://bit.ly/fuiRS9
is she emotionally, mentally, and spiritually taking care of herself?
For each person that means different things. However, unless you have all four legs of
that chair, all those areas of life in place, the chair will break and you will fall to the
floor.
Is she feeling creative? (mental), is she practicing a sense of surrender and gratitude?
(spiritual) and just by her being around you she is practicing the emotional muscle
(since you are listening and being kind to her so she clearly made the right choice in
contacting you).
When the chair is built, and there is a nice cushion on it, she can sit again, and her
mind and body will be able to relax. Thanks to you and thanks to her of course. The
point is, this is perhaps the only way in which you can help, the real answers, the deep
aha! Moments will only come from within her, all you can do is provide the .

Love or career? @Karlavigilante

They are the same. If they arent the same, then figure out how to move towards a
point where they are the same. There are no excuses in this.

Where should I go on my honeymoon? @VeryStonemanEsq

Heres the problem with a honeymoon (in general): 3 hours in an airport, 3-10 hours
flying someplace, 2 hours getting from airport to hotel, checking in, then resting after
all of that, then eating too much food, getting sunburned, doing too many planned
activities (instead of the most important activity that happens on a honeymoon), and
then rushing back to airport and repeating process.
What a drag! Does twenty hours of traveling sound like fun to you? And spending
another $10,000 in the process? And then maybe getting a tour of a lizard garden or
whatever else you do on an average honeymoon?
People go to get away from the worries of life, the pressures of family and friends, to
have privacy, to consummate, etc. So just do all of that, but without the hassles of all
of the above.
Do the staycation, where you stay at home, but plan to do things you would never ever
do at home. Dont make any plans with friends or family. Dont even tell them what you
are doing. Send exotic postcards to them.
Then really make an effort to find new things in the area you think you know well.
Worst case, go 20 minutes out and stay at a bed and breakfast or two.
Final result: More time with your new spouse. Less money spent. Less travel hassles.
More energy. Probably better food (did you really think Club Med food was going to be
better than the cheapest diner?). And probably more fun.
And, if you hate everything I said and disagree with me totally, do one of these things:
1.
2.
3.

Amangani http://bit.ly/yhCwN Super vacation resorts around the world.

Bible History Daily. Why not go on a biblical archaeological dig? http://bit.ly/w0tgiN
Samahita Retreat Yoga Spa http://bit.ly/TGYhv

My best vacations happened when I had just started working a corporate job and I
would take off a week just to explore the city I lived in. My two worst vacations ever
were probably my two honeymoons.

SEX
Whats the easiest way to get into a threesome? @bear23
Not having been in one, I assume the easiest way (now that I think about it) is to use
Craigslist and just put an ad up. It shouldnt be too hard.
That said, if youre a guy and want to meet women in bulk, who want to meet men,
and who have the full spectrum of tastes and desires, then, go where they are.
If you hang out at the local chess club youre not going to meet women.
If you hang out at cooking class you are going to meet women who want to get
married.
But if you go to yoga class and tango class then youre going to meet beautiful, sexy,
women who are physically healthy, stretch the boundaries of what they are willing to
attempt physically, and perhaps most importantly, they want to meet men. Not
everyone, of course (if that were the case then there would be more men in these
classes than women) but some definitely. So stop watching football on a Sunday
afternoon (i.e. no women) and go to the nearest tango class (lots of women).
For me, I like one on one and falling in love. My guy friends always think Im like a girl.
The second I have sex with a girl I fall in love, which means I then get in trouble. I
cant imagine getting in trouble with two girls. And on top it, performance anxiety with
one girl is enough, I dont need the headaches of two.

How can I have charisma? - @PriscillaPWood

It feels like I have ego if I answer this question. I cant claim to be charismatic. But I do
know what people will respond to in the long run. Try to work very hard at this list:
BE YOURSELF. Meaning: dont be afraid to say what you mean. Dont hurt anyone by
doing it but dont be afraid to speak up and stand up for what you think is the right
thing. Dont be a follower.

BE HONEST. Ive written before about the power of honesty. What happens when you
always speak the truth is that eventually, with practice, your words speak truth to the
universe. Your words become law. What you say has power.
People respond to THE FORCE of your words because they know each word has impact.
Think about it, there are so many ways in which we lie, in tiny ways, even to ourselves.
But if you stop it, or work on it, or practice being honest, the benefits are beyond what
can be imagined.
BE KIND: always have good will towards people. I really believe in what Buddha said to
his son Rahula (Which I describe in Was Buddha a Bad Father): Before, during, and
after any thought, speech, or action FOCUS on whether or not you are doing harm.
When you just do these things, this is going to sound corny, an inner light will shine
through. People will see it. That is real charisma. I hope one day I can have it.

In marriage how often should a man/woman get paid or have

sex with their significant other? @Psfs
First off, you use an interesting phrase: get paid. Given the scarcity of characters we
have on Twitter (140), you could have just said, how often should one have sex with
their spouse? Instead, you had to explain it.
So get paid sort of implies one side owes something to the other side (the man or the
woman, you are careful enough to point out).
I would say it is better if you both want it. How can that happen? Well, keeping the
paid analogy, why dont you do a little of your wifes job and she does a little of yours?
Try that every day. See if it increases the feeling of partnership or the feeling of
wanting the other in your life. Then try this: have sex every day for a year.
That seems like a lot of work. Particularly if you are older. How can you have an
orgasm every day? Well, who says you have to have that? But have sex every day for a
year anyway, no pressures, just fun.
Check out this article http://nyti.ms/wHIbx4 on a couple that had sex every day for a
year. It sounds pretty good. I think Ill try it.

Good friend is cheating on wife. Should I tell the wife? Asked

anonymously through DM
NO! Dont be in the middle. There are many reasons why someone cheats. There are
many issues that the person is working out individually and also as a couple. Why make
the personal problems of a couple the personal problems of a triple (when you include
yourself).
I have seen this several times. Where a friend is cheating. Even when Ive seen people
close to me being cheated on, for instance, I see the husband of a good friend out with
another woman. Im friends with the wife but not the husband so could have easily told
the wife but I chose to stay out of it.
Why did I stay out of it?
Because sooner or later the wife finds out. And all shit hits the fan. Why be in the
middle of shit spraying on your face. The couple will work it out sooner or later. One
way or the other. For better or for worse. In sickness and in health.

How do I go through life loving just one woman when I see floods
of beautiful women every day? Shouldnt monogamy be
dissolved? @eefeanyi
Lets look at the upside and downside of this. Obviously theres one downside to being
monogamous: you cant have sex with other women/men. Sex with someone new is a
great, exciting thing. Even if it comes bottled up with intrigue, chasing, and an eventual
end.
So what are the upsides of monogamy?
A)

You definitely get to know someone a lot better.

B)
With that knowledge, you penetrate not only the body but many different layers
you didnt know existed before, particularly if you are serious about continuing to fall in
love with the person you are with.
C) If you jump from person to person (literally) you never get to experience that
depth. But, as I mentioned in the Diseases that Billionaires Get, http://bit.ly/qMghRZ

its hard (like anything thats worth it) to stick with monogamy. Perhaps the most
important thing (for men) to know, is that scientific evidence suggests that
monogamous relationships lead to a greater life expectancy.

MARRIAGE
What is the purpose of marriage? @RobertSinn
Marriage is a gift you give to your spouse. Its a gift that says, I have fully enjoyed our
past together, I fully enjoy our present together, and now I want to devote the rest of
my future to helping you achieve your goals, to being with you, to you being with me,
and to taking care of you (or vice versa) when we are old and sick, as we almost
assuredly will be.
You cannot give a gift like that lightly. The pieces have to be set up in the right spots.
Everything has to be aligned. The slightest piece off could mean that your position has
gone from strikingly interesting to dubious. The seeds of disaster are always right
there in front of you if they exist.
One area where Claudia and I differ, for instance, is that she likes to travel. I dont. But
Ive succumbed. We have been all over the world since we met, which fortunately has
been much to my enjoyment. One way shes sacrificed if you call it that, is that I have
two kids. Two kids are a lot of work! But she loves them and it works.
But the rest of the position on the board works. So I was happy to give her this gift and
I hope she was happy to give this gift to me.

But do you have to be legally married? - @RobertSinn

Of course, the answer is No. You dont have to be anything. But theres something
psychological about being physically married. You go from what am I going to do with
Claudia tomorrow or this week or this month to Where should Claudia and I live
fifteen years from now? And how do we get there together, hand in hand. If you can
get that feeling without being legally married then power to you. But for me, I cant.
The past and the future co-mingle once that marriage certificate is issued. If marriage is
a gift then getting legally married puts the wrapping on that gift. It makes the gift
pretty.

So that answers: What is the purpose of marriage, but lets do a quick checklist on The
Should You Get Married Checklist:
ETHICS. You should both have similar ethical standards. Standards about non-violence,
telling the truth, feelings about adultery. Feelings about what you want in life (does this
have to do with ethics? Of course, because if you want similar things then you will feel
similar feelings of envy or non-envy as the occasion arises).
In New York City, I go to Grand Central a lot to take the train home. Whenever I see a
man and a woman kissing right by the train-gates I think one thing: adultery. I would
say about 1/3 of New York City marriages are adulterous. That is their business. But
why are people taking trains to two different places in the suburbs? Its because they
live with two different spouses. Again, its their business. But doesnt seem for me like
the most relaxing and pleasurable way to live life.
DISCIPLINE. Do you both work in similar fashion towards your goals? Do you both keep
clean? Equal standards of cleanliness are very important. Claudia is very clean, for
instance, and Im disgusting. But I work towards being similar to her. Its important to
me. If it wasnt, then attraction would subside faster than it normally does in any longterm relationship.
There is a saying, put a dime in a glass jar every time you have sex with your
girlfriend/wife the first year. After that, take a dime out every time you have sex. Youll
never empty the jar.
Your goal, if all of these boxes are checked, is to empty that jar as quickly as possible.
Equal standards of cleanliness and discipline are part of that after that blissful first year.
Do you both eventually want to move towards a life of material pursuit to one less
ambitious, more in tune with contentment? This goes along with religion. If one is into
New Age Born Again Christian Astrology and the other is an atheist then these are
100% different belief systems. So this suggests you might have great chemistry but in
the long run, even five years out, you might have great problems. (Nothing wrong with
New Age Born Again Christian Astrology and nothing wrong with atheism. But they are
different).
The notion of contentment is very important. If one side wants to make $100 million
and be a high-powered banker in the city and the other person wants to eventually live
in a small house by the ocean then, again, the first year might have been huge

chemistry but in the long run youre going to drift to people who have similar feelings
about long-term contentment.
C)
Physically. You should always have similar ideas about what constitutes good
health and the methods for keeping the good health. If one of you works out every day
and the other never does then attraction would be lost fast. Also, the one who works
out every day will have consistently higher libido. And the one who doesnt work out
every day will feel badly about how they look and will end up with lower libido. If libidos
are way out of whack then, thats it, the marriage is in trouble and adultery is around
the corner.
Physical also means how much energy you have. If one is filled with energy from eating
well, sleeping well, exercising, etc. then the other person needs to keep up. Again, this
can all be covered up the first year or two. But in marriage, things like this are seeds
that turn into a big tree. And you can be at the bottom of that tree while your partner
has climbed the top and is staring out at the mountains on the other side of the river.
D)
Mentally. This doesnt mean you have to be equally smart, or like the same books
and movies. In every Woody Allen movie they all seem to like the same boring operas
and then break up at the end. But I do think it means having a similar curiosity, a
similar love of having things you are passionate about, a similar eagerness to explore
the unknown (and by the way, Im not saying you should both want to explore the
unknown but have a similar predilection one way or the other towards exploring the
unknown).
E)
Emotionally. Theres the notion called splitting the difference one side is
always aggressive, the other side is always passive. One side always wants to clean the
house, the other side always wants to mess up the house. And this difference gets
wider after marriage. So there has to be a constant recognition, Okay, this is where
Im splitting the difference and try to bring that difference back to even. A conscious
decision on both sides. Its a daily check because it happens every day. You have to
consciously think: this is what she would do, so you do it first. Theres a piece of dog
shit on the floor. I should pick it up first (By the way, I could probably never marry
someone with a dog). Theres a light on in the other room. I dont care but I should
shut it down first. And she should be thinking the same way. He probably wants that
Amazon Kindle Case so he doesnt break his Kindle. Ill get it.
WILLINGNESS TO SURPRISE. The senses get dulled over time. If someone keeps
scratching an itch, it eventually has no effect, or you end up with a bloody scab. You

need different ways to approach surprise. To bring you back to that feeling you had the
first moment you kissed.
One guy once wrote me last Valentines Day and said, Its 5PM Valentines Day, I have
no idea what to do? I never heard from him again after that but here was my answer:
Try one of these two things. With your handy waiter pad, fill it up with notes of love.
Put it all over the house, so that even a year from now she might find a note in an
obscure spot. Or make a blog, where every post is a different reason you love her. You
cant ever forget the desire to surprise that you had that first week, month, year.
SPIRITUAL SIMILARITIES. Ultimately, we are all on a path. Not to see who makes the
most money. Or who can bowl the most strikes in game. Or who can do the most
pushups. But what are the attributes I need to pursue to find contentment in life.
Youre 30 years old, say, and thinking of getting married. 60 years is a long time if you
think you are going to be in a monogamous relationship that long.
Its good to check the box that you are on a similar path towards contentment. Not
necessarily happiness. Im happy when Im eating a big lemon pound cake. But then
the cake is gone and I feel sick. But contentment, where everything you have is
enough. Where everything you do not have is in just the right spot. And youre together
and thats good.
By the way, the above checklist is not just to decide if you should get married to X, but
if you, personally, should get married at all! You might not be ready to be ethical in
terms of adultery. You might not have any clue what sorts of long-term goals
surrounding contentment you have. Who knows? I just think this is a good starting
point.

What is the ONE piece of advice do you have if you have a

newborn baby? @euros
Nine months ago a lot of people had unprotected sex. How do I know this? Because
Ive been asked this exact question three times in the past week: I congratulate these
people on having such pleasure in their lives nine months ago. Its a great thing to
orgasm knowing that you mightve have also created another human being to add to
the seven billion that already exist.
I reminded the questioner that I was far from the expert.

A)

I wanted my first daughter to be aborted http://bit.ly/g4a30s

B)

I want my kids to be lesbians http://bit.ly/jdvDH2

C)

I played poker the night my daughter was born http://bit.ly/dWkL0c

D)
Some would argue my kids should be taken away from me because I dont want
them to go to college http://bit.ly/iewfpx
So from beginning to end I might be a screw-up.
But I will give it an answer: because who better to answer the questions in the Kings
court than the Jester himself. The one who has been so foolish and who has nothing to
lose (a jesters position, in every movie Ive ever seen about medieval times, seems to
be infinitely secure).
My one advice: take care of and nurture your relationship with your wife. Why?
Because for years your wife and you lived in your own private island. You made jokes
to each other that nobody could understand. You spoke your own private language.
You shared hopes, dreams, kisses only with each other.
Suddenly, the worst thing possible happens. A 1 foot tall human moves into your house.
Just like that she moves in. Who the hell invited her? She doesnt speak English. She
shits on the floor and you have to clean it. She cries a lot.
And it doesnt get better. In fact, for the first two years it gets worse. Wait till she starts
walking. Now shes hurting herself by running into things. No normal human
being would run into that TV set but she did. And then, ugh, she gets toilet trained.
Now you have to make sure she makes it to the bathroom in time. Or there will be shit
and urine everywhere and you have to get down on your hands and knees and clean it
up. Did you ever think, when you were 15 years old and planning on being an
astronaut, that you would be on your hands and knees cleaning up the shit of this
uninvited guest.
And what limited space you and your wife have (youre just starting out in life: your
free from your own parents, schools, maybe your first corporate jobs where you were
no better than slaves) and now space is stolen from you. Your child needs a bedroom,
then maybe a playroom, then maybe toys.

In fact, your child needs to be constantly entertained. It sucks! Taking care of a child is
a Zen experience and I mean that in a negative way (almost all Zen experiences are
negative). Just take the basic fact: you are sitting on the floor in the lotus position for
an hour doing nothing. Boring and painful. The Lotus position is not designed to be a
pleasurable position for the body. By the time you get up, your legs have fallen asleep,
the blood rushes back in full force and the pain for at least sixty seconds is as if you
had your legs amputated without anesthetic.
Taking care of a child is Zen because you can only focus on the child. You cant focus
on anything else. For hours. And by the way, thats mostly your wife. Or your
babysitter, who could care less about your kid for the most part.
Heres what I did by accident the first week after my kid was born:
On the way to playing poker my then-wife asked me to take the garbage out. Instead, I
did the worst thing you could ever do.
There was a garbage bag sitting outside the bedroom. I took that garbage bag of brand
new clothes instead of the garbage bag that was, of course, supposed to go in the
garbage can.
It was all her clothes that she was going to wear for Easter. My first child was born at
the end of February. Which means, with Easter around the corner we were still in that
special window where a womans body has not quite fully recovered, not quite achieved
its former glamor (which is the hidden secret because your wife is allowed to
acknowledge that and plan for it but you must never mention it). She had carefully
planned, stitch by stitch, dresses, undergarments, socks, everything, what she would
wear for Easter.
I threw out all her Easter clothes.
Then I went to play poker. I lost $500 that night. Walking home across the park
Madison Green (now home of the famous Shake Shack hamburger joint) at 4 in the
morning I had to jump and stomp as high as possible to clear out the rats which
covered every possible inch of the path through the park. They scurried away and at
that moment it occurred to me.
I was in big trouble. And I was. Several weeks later (since I hid the facts of what I had

done and even pleaded ignorance until there was no way out) I had to get down on my
knees and cry apologies and perhaps even threaten my own life or the life of my zero
year old to somehow cancel out all the pain that was caused.
I say this not as one event that should be avoided but as a cascading series of events
that occurs when child#1 is born. Events that when added up irrevocably change the
binding that was once two and you have to adjust to the School House Rock / De La
Soul song Three Is the Magic Number. Yes it is, as the lyrics go, its the magic
number. No more twos.
For me, three never became magic. And neither did four. And ultimately my marriage
was gone. And ultimately I got divorced and I met Claudia http://bit.ly/mDC2uD. I can
argue for me it worked out for the best. Maybe for you it will work out for the best also.
But kids want their parents to stay together. So this is a long of saying...
The most important advice I can give when your first child is born is pay attention to
your wife. She will take care of you when you are sick. And many years later, she will
think about you when you are long gone.

Best advice for newlyweds? ;) -@abbymaries

Im perfectly qualified for this question, having been a newlywed now twice!
I think theres four parts of a relationship:
That initial honeymoon period where its all goo-goo love and is very nice and
what we always remember and/or fantasize about.
The wedding planning when everything involves taking the relationship to that
all-important next level. We almost forget the past and the future when we are going
through this. The planning is all-consuming.
The real honeymoon. The thing that happens there is we start thinking about
the future. The long-term future. Right after you get married you realize, Wow, Im
going to probably spend forty to sixty years with this person. And you start planning
and imagining how that will happen.
-

Babies. But lets not worry about that yet. Youre a newlywed.

So youre in part 3. Where you start thinking about the future. Where will you live? How
will you afford it? When will you have kids? How will you afford their education and
health? Should you rewrite your wills? Should you now start a business or settle in for
the long-run at your corporation?
So much future to plan for! Sixty years! Holy shit!
Butyou cant ever forget about that initial honeymoon period.
Where you wake up next to someone and feel surprised that he or she is actually
THERE. You can touch them! They are there for you. There is something new every day
you learn.
Remember: theres something new every day that you can learn from the other person.
Some new passion you can incite. Some new smile you can create on the other persons
face.
Planning for the future takes up a lot of mental energy. So dont ever forget about that
initial passion and how happy it made you both feel. Try every day to surprise the other
person with your memories of it and how happy you were then. You both were.
Finally, the honeymoon never lasts forever, but it's fun to see if you can be the first to
make it last that long.

DIVORCE
When do you decide to leave someone? At what point is it really
over? Even if you share children? @brainybetty
This not a simple question. Particularly when there are children involved. You should
always try to make things work. But, there are exceptions:
1. Is the person abusive to you in any way? This could be the result of a
temperament theyve had since their childhood. It also can be a result of your own
temperament, which is allowing abuse without setting boundaries.
2. Is the person abusive to the kids in any way? Then the kids must be removed from
the person immediately. When someone is abusive towards another it is already a
pattern, and one that is hard to break. If this person has abused your child in any
way then there is simply no turning back. The person needs help, and your children
need to be far from that sickness.
3. Most situations are not so direct. And abuse is subtle. So my thermometer is: have
the arguments worn you down to the bone. Where you cant even look at the person
without the two of you arguing? In my own situation I was arguing so much with my
ex-wife the police had to be called and I had to spend the night at a motel. When
things like that start to happen then there is nothing good that can be the result. Its
time to move on.
One time my youngest came into the kitchen where her mom and I were arguing. She
asked: Umm, Josie [her older sister] wants to know if you guys are going to stay
together. Somehow Josie had convinced her younger sister to broach this question to
us. They were scared. They were confused. Just like the stock market and the world
economy, kids abhor uncertainty. After that I knew it was over.
Never forget that the kids want love. They dont want hate. Four happy parents (when
you mix the step-parents) are much better than two very unhappy, constantly arguing
parents.

If I make a billion shall I rub it in the ex-wifes face?

@TraderStrong
No! Theres that expression the best revenge is living well. It doesnt say, the best
revenge is smothering your exs face with your success. In fact, Im going to change
the expression slightly. The best revenge is just being happy. The statement is almost
a logical impossibility. You cant be really happy if you are consumed with thoughts of
revenge.
There are quite a few people I want revenge on. I know I wont be happy until those
feelings of revenge start to go down and eventually disappear. How do I do that?
Every time I think, man, Im going to get that guy back or whatever, I catch myself
and think not useful. I wont be happy until I stop thinking not useful thoughts. Its
hard to catch yourself in the middle of one of these thoughts. You have to practice.
Practice is the water; the feelings of revenge are like a rock in your head.
Eventually water withers away the rock. When no rocks are left, you have a clean sandy
beach, then the ocean, then the horizon. Happy.

LIFE
I spend a great deal of time holding myself back. How do I stop
it?? - @wiztrader
The structure of your question is revealing because of the two question marks. As if
your own body (holding myself back) is totally out of your control. The use of the
word it, again implying your inability to move forward is somehow an it, outside of
you, controlling you. So lets ask: What is controlling you?
I will tell you. Your parents are. Your friends are. Your spouse is. Your job is. Your
colleagues are. Your children are. So many people have expectations of you. Each one
draws a circle around you. You cant move beyond each persons circle without
disappointing their expectations.
And so where can you stand? You stand in the center, in the tiniest circle of all, the tiny
circle that is the intersection of all the many circles drawn around you.
You need to step out of the circles. Forget about it for a second. There is no it.
There is you. You need to step out of those circles but its not so easy. Youve just
spent the first half of your life keeping inside of them.
To step out in one second is impossible or , at the very least, hard. You are now a spy.
A spy on your own life. There are enemies everywhere, keeping track of your position.
You must attempt to fool them.
Do something a little different. Finger-paint. Take the wrong subway. Go vegetarian for
a week. Leave in the middle of the day and dont comeback. Go to a museum instead.
Write a one page novel. Give advice to someone who didnt ask for it and doesnt want
it.
My favorite: return an email from 2007. Start it: Sorry for the small delay. Write an
email to someone you hate and say, Hows it going today?
You cant jump forward tillyou learn how to step forward. To step forward you have to
start breaking through these tight circles wrapped around you. You have to practice
what its like to move outside the circles.

In the movie THX-1138 (George Lucas, pre Star Wars), all of the inhabitants of the
underworld are told the world above has been destroyed by radiation. So they have to
live in this tightly controlled 1984ish world with tight controls. The main characters, as
they do, fall in love. They are chased for breaking the rules. Eventually they hit above
ground and realize it is not wracked with radiation. It is, in fact, a paradise.
Give yourself time. Practice stepping outside the circles. Eventually you will break free
into the above world. And nothing will ever hold you back again.

How do you take that next step towards living and adventure
when life is full of inertia to stay silent and still? @kaisdavis
On any given day the general tendency is to just do your normal routine. The normal
routine is a jealous beast. It doesnt want us to do anything new. So it basically has us
in the routines that keep us trapped into continuing its follies: We eat heavy, greasy
food, which weighs us down and keeps us sluggish. We drink which further removes
the methods by which we can escape out of the box weve carved out for ourselves. We
go to our shit jobs so we can pay back our student loan debts. We hang out with our
friends. I would like to hang out more with friends. But its hard to do that and plan for
the exciting future which we can rightfully claim to be ours.
We live our normal routines because we have been told forever thats how we become
happy. We become afraid to break out of the routine. To risk the unhappiness that
might occur.
The key ultimately is to, first, figure out how to get rid of the inertia and then the real
living will come.
I have had periods of real inertia. Where all I could do was sit around and be
depressed. The only way Ive been able to get out of it is to make sure every day Im
checking the box on the following items:
- am I improving physically?
- am I improving emotionally - getting rid of negative influences, surrounding myself
with positive influences?
- am I improving mentally - writing down lists of ideas every day?
- am I improving spiritually - being grateful for what I have, focusing on the present
moment, surrendering to whatever higher power or subconscious power, that I might
believe in?

How can one be both smart and good looking? @Mike_Ocsbig

Its hard to be smart and good-looking. So I told god before I was born I would only
take the former. Just to guarantee it.

What defines you as a person? @Morgan_03

My goal is to have nothing define me as a person.

Really? Not even loving father, caring husband, successful

entrepreneur?- @Morgan_03
All of these things are good things. I want to, of course, be a caring father, and I want
to achieve success in a variety of silos in my life. But when Im on my deathbed I
ultimately want to be just me.
I want nothing to define me. Nothing I can look back on and say that was me
because all of that is artificial and man-made. Any definition at all is limiting. At the end
of my life, when Im staring into god knows what, I want to be limitless.

What would James Altucher do if he was 25 years old right now?

@rballe33
Not everyone could be a Mark Zuckerberg and start a new business from scratch and
watch it grow into billions. So the obvious answer of start a business doesnt really
apply. Starting a business is hard, needs money, and requires you to know what people
are missing in their lives. Also, a consumer-oriented business is the hardest sort of
business to start, but if you have no enterprise experience, then its also difficult to start
a business selling to the enterprise.
Believe it or not, heres what I would recommend: work at a big company, learn
everything about them, find out what they are missing, and after two years start a
business supplying the things you find that they were missing.
This, in fact is what I did (I was 26 and not 25) when I went to work for HBO. If you
are vigilant, you will find many things they are missing and even if they dont become
your first client, if you build your network while you are on the job, you will find first

clients for your service. (Be service-oriented, then transform to product-oriented. This
way you are profitable right away).

Whats your perfect day like? @brainybetty

Im not going to answer on what my perfect day is. But what your perfect day could
look like. Try to check these boxes:
Be around people who love you
Come up with ten new ideas for businesses you can start, how you can improve
your job, books or articles you can write, gifts or favors you can give people you love,
ideas for how you can help others, etc. Just come up with ten new ideas.
Kiss someone. Preferably a lot. Kids are good. Or a spouse.
Do something creative. Ideally something creative that either makes you money
or theres way to connect the dots between creativity and money. Creativity doesnt
always have to equal more money but it helps. Even if its a business idea. Businesses
are creative. Not just paintings or novels.
I sleep eight or nine hours. Or, heck, ten hours.
I find a time in the middle of the day to be by myself for a bit.
Part of that time I can use to read a book.
Part of it I can use to just be quiet and not think or worry about anything.
I take a huge BM. Nothing is better than that.
I avoid all junk food and eat no more than two healthy meals a day. Some
people say you should eat lots of little meals all day long. Maybe they are right. But I
find that its hard to eat little meals and that I tend to eat lots of big meals all day long
whenever I try that approach.
I have feelings of gratitude towards everyone I meet. This is hard and is a
practice (for me).
Ideally I meet or talk to new people during the day but I dont do more than one
meeting in the morning and one meeting in the afternoon.
I exercise. Ideally yoga with Claudia.
I read a spiritual text of some sort.
I read good fiction.
Believe it or not, I find on most days I can do most of the above. Tell me in the
comments how your ideal day might be different or what you think I should add to
mine.

CRAPPY PEOPLE
What do you do when you cant ignore the crappy person because
you have to report to them? @shoaglun
Heres the issue with crappy people they are the people that drive you crazy the
most, the ones you cant stop thinking about and the ones you are constantly imagining
arguments, responses, counter-responses, things they did that were wrong, etc.
I sometimes wake up thinking about these things and it is a discipline (hard) to divert
myself because almost by definition they are the people you cant avoid. Bosses,
colleagues, family, friends of friends, etc. That is why they are in our lives in the first
place, else you would ignore them and move on.
The trick is to just not engage. If they want to provoke, or yell, or spit, or do something
crappy, then:
#1. Be as polite as possible but dont respond to anything provoking. Silence and
minimal words are best things to do.
#2. Remove yourself from the situation/phone/location as quickly as possible.
Why be around someone crappy when you can try to be around someone you love?
An interesting thing happens. A few months ago I heard a phrase the herx reaction. It
occurs when you start taking antibiotics. Sometimes you get worse first.
When you dont engage, the crappy people go crazy. You know the phrase, ignoring is
the best revenge. When you ignore or dont engage with whoever is trying to provoke
you, you cut off their supply of food and oxygen. They feed off of being crappy to you.
Dont feed the monster!
Its up to you to stop feeding them. And at first they will scream in anger and hunger.
They desperately want to be fed!
Then, bit by bit they will starve. Then finally, they will be extinguished. You will have

trained them in that you do not respond to crappiness. And you will be more alive than
ever.

What is the best way to deal with a co-worker who consistently

discredits you in a passive aggressive way? @robertsgm
A)

Never argue with him.

B)

Never gossip about him behind his back.

C)

Never blame him.

D) Never respond to anything he says other than direct, factual information or a

simple yes or no.
In other words: No Dancing. This person is an inconsequential bug. Dont think about
him, talk about him, talk to him, or think to him in any way. This creates the
atmosphere/ecosystem/training where it will his passive aggressiveness will ultimately
have no effect on you.
Remember, he was probably beaten as a child, or rejected by girls, or harassed by
other bosses or co-workers and now he is trying to do all of that to you. Dont let any of
it stick on your mind, your emotions, or your body. Its hard. But you will do it. And
thats how he will be trained like a dog, that he is to treat you better.
And once he starts treating you better, give him credit when credit is deserved.
Eventually this person will want to be your best friend. But by then you will have long
moved on.

What should you do if youre avoiding a friend and you dont know
why? @estheria
This has happened to me repeatedly. You have to ask yourself one thing: Am I avoiding
him today simply because I avoided him yesterday. An avoidance bubble of sorts. In
other words, are you feeling so much shame about avoiding your friend that that its
preventing you from reaching out today. If the answer is no then move onto the next
paragraph.

Something is wrong. Your body and mind are telling you to stay away. You can do
some self-enquiry and start listing reasons why your mind might be telling you to stay
away, but your mind might not answer. Your body and mind might be keeping it a
secret. But respect the secret. Dont force it. You are a busy person. If youre body is
telling you, this person is bad for you right now. Stay away. Then after briefly
considering the reasons why this might be, take the advice: stay away.

I hate calling people back that are energy drainers. Do you think I
will have bad karma if I dont call them back? @Bert_Hancock
Unless its the IRS, theres rarely a need to call back the people who drain you. I say
this for the general case (if someones in the hospital and its their dying breath then
you might as well pick up, for instance).
Lets think about it out loud for a second.
If you dont call them back several things happen:
A) You save energy instead of lose it during the 30 minutes that phone call wouldve
taken. What will you do with those thirty minutes? Maybe youll walk by the river?
Maybe youll take out a notebook and be creative. Maybe youll call your kids and tell
them you love them?
Almost everything you can do thats positive will be better than talking to a zombie that
wants to drain you.
B) he person whose call you didnt return will begin to hate you and will stop calling
you. Great! Youve trained them well. Future energy will be preserved.
Energy is finite for everything in the universe. We run out of it. Eventually the big bang
will reverse and implode. So whatever you can do to build energy (see below question)
and preserve it (see this question) is critical for the quality of your life.
But theres one more question that needs to be asked: why does someone drain you?
Sometimes we let people drain us?
We feed off of it. We get provoked. We attack back. We engage in the game, the

dance, we get in the three-legged race with the people we hate most. Part of avoiding
energy draining is not only training the other person but really being honest with
yourself.
Why does this person have permission to call you in the first place? So the first steps
come not whether or not to return a call but to prevent the call from even happening.
And this requires constant awareness of who you are associating yourself with.
You ultimately become like the people you associate with. Start today being more
aware of who those people are.

What do you do when someone wont forgive? And when they

have no desire for owning their part, only hating & feeling like
victim? -@asplenia
We all deal with these people every day. These are called crappy people in my overly
simplistic terminology. And guess what?
Crappy people arent the neighbors down the street. Or the people from the distant
past you never see anymore. Crappy people, by definition, are the people often closest
to you: family, friends, colleagues, and bosses.
The question is: why do you care so much what is going on inside of these other
people. Only worry whats going on inside you. And if someone is inside of your head,
then get them out. So the only answer really is to ignore them. If you cant ignore
them completely, then dont engage with them. Say hi and dont let them press
buttons. Respond politely. Be pleasant. But get away as soon as possible so you can
come back on the computer and read my blog.

Would the world be a better place if each person in the world had
a no retaliation allowed, one free punch per year? @icekevin
Haha, I know what you mean. What you are really asking is: if everyone was slightly
afraid that they would be a recipient of that no-retaliation one punch per year then
perhaps people might behave better to each other.
The other day I was in Grand Central Gourmet. At rush hour when everyone is trying to

buy some last minute food before catching their trains, I accidentally bumped into an
older woman (in her 70s or 80s). Just brushed against her. She shoved me so hard I
fell to the floor and dropped my own bag of food.
Should I have punched her? Would that have made the world a better place? Maybe
she was a survivor of concentration camps? Maybe her father beat her so now she felt
comfortable the rest of her life beating others. Maybe her son or daughter had died an
early death. I have no idea what was going on in her life really.
Why then, punch her? Even if I could. Would that make the world a better place if that
was my once a year no-retaliation punch?
No.
Instead she became my greatest teacher that day. A day where I had already met
many fascinating other teachers. I had to quickly pick myself up, pick my food up, get
on my train, and not let my mind be crowded with thoughts of anger for her.
Thats pretty hard! I dare you to try it. Thats much harder than punching her. I couldnt
stop wondering, why did she shove me so violently? Who would do that? Heck, Im
still thinking of it.
But eventually the thoughts did simmer down. And on the train ride back I was able to
enjoy a book. And I was happy when I got home and was able to see the Hudson River
from my house, and the leaves on the trees turning all sorts of colors. I was able to log
onto my computer and answer emails. I was able to come up with ideas. I was able to
enjoy dinner. I was able to write a post.
I was able to save the world. No punching.

MOTIVATION
I know that you write a lot about getting motivated when times
are bad, but how do you stay motivated when times are good?
@derekwhurst
Every day wake up and pretend you are a superhero. Youre Clark Kent. Nobody knows
you are a superhero. But you wake up and you get out of your bed and you have a
mission: you have to save at least one life today.
Repeat it to yourself: I have to save a life today. Who will it be?
Then the rest of the day, be on the lookout for how you can help save that live. Or, if
you must, go ahead and save the world.
Its a costume game. Its make-believe. And it works.

What motivated you to when you were 20, 30, 40 yrs old @marty7higgins
When I was 20 I wanted to write the Great American Novel. Now, why in hell would a
healthy young 20 year old with no experience in life want to sit in front of a computer
for 4-5 hours a day for maybe one to two years with little or no hope of actually getting
published? In fact, I probably spent five years in front of that computer for five to ten
hours a day.
One reason: sex. I though, perhaps misguidedly, that if I was the author of a great
novel then despite what I perceived to be my other disadvantages, that girls would
want to have sex with me. Lots of girls. Any girl I wanted, in fact.
What was wrong with me? A lots of things. For starters I lacked self-confidence. If I
had spent those five years trying to have more confidence in myself, trying to fill the
emptiness I thought a finished novel would fill, then not only would I have been a lot
happier during that time, I wouldve had a lot more time on my hands (instead of

writing four unpublished novels) and I probably wouldve been having sex with many
more women.
By 30 I had the same goal. But then, instead of the great American novel, I thought
that having a million dollars or more would do the trick. By the way, writing novels does
do the trick. You get a lot of confidence (temporarily, until you slip back to old habits),
and confidence gets you all the sex you want. Not money but being able to stand up
and assert: I can rule the world if I want to but I just dont feel like it right now.
At 40 finally, I have some confidence. So my goals are different. I have a healthy
relationship with my wife. Shes beautiful and she loves me. I think.
Now, I want freedom. Freedom from what? I dont know yet. But I know theres still
some emptiness inside of me. I know that every day I try to fill it in various small ways.
I look for a path when I know, intellectually, that a path is needed. One day Ill find the
right path. And I know it will be inside me. But now Im still looking for that elusive
freedom from the forest which on occasion clouds my brain and soul.

How do I motivate others? @AmanAlam

Basically, if your bodies are aligned, if you are keeping healthy physically, emotionally,
mentally, and spiritually then you will shine and glow and be a beacon to others. Thats
the only way to truly motivate others.
Else the ones you are trying to motivate will sense where your bodies are weak and you
will come across as false.

Which gives you more satisfaction, reinventing your own life or

inspiring others to reinvent theirs? Why? @iChmpneGrl
About a year ago I got sick of talking about stocks. Everyone wants stock tips. They
think if they buy a stock and it goes up then they will be happier than they are now.
That they will be more safe. Some of my stock tips would go up , some would go
down. When the stocks would go up, I would never hear from people again. When the
stock would go down, everyone would send me angry notes.
So if along the way to happiness theres a lot of potential for anger, then its not a true
happiness. Its not even a true road.

I wanted to reinvent myself. And the way I reinvented myself is by writing a blog that
shows how I reinvented myself and maybe that gives a little inspiration to help other
people find the right way to reinvent their own selves.
People are still angry at me. But its for their own reasons that have nothing to do with
me. And Im happier.

SUCCESS
How do you define success? @TalentedBlonde
A friend of mine had breakfast with a well-known billionaire. All the billionaire kept
doing for the entire breakfast was complain about how Larry Page has $18 billion and
he only has $2 billion.
Most people set goals and when they achieve those goals they think two things: Wow,
Im successful! and thenWait a second. I want more!
We have been, as a society, brainwashed into thinking that the trappings of success
(money, fame, promotions at a job) will get us to happiness. Weve been conditioned
and then enslaved by the slave masters of flesh, bank accounts, vanity, and the futility
of thinking we can change things, we can find a path that will fill the emptiness inside.
Success ultimately boils down to the questions we ask ourselves which are related to
The Daily Practice http://bit.ly/fuiRS9, which I recommend:
1)

Are we

PHYSICALLY

healthy?

2)
Are we EMOTIONALLY healthy? Do we surround ourselves with people we love and
who love us and avoid the dance with the people who bring us down?
3)
Are we MENTALLY healthy? i.e. do we generate good ideas and use those ideas to
benefit ourselves and others?
4)
Are we SPIRITUALLY healthy? i.e. do we have a good sense of surrender and use
that sense to walk through life with humility, gratitude and reverence.
External success allows us the freedom to pursue these internal successes. Thats real
success! And we never achieve it but always, continuously strive for it. Success is a
practice.

In your opinion/experience, what defines success? @texandcoda

When I first made a lot of money I thought: This is it! I succeeded in New York. Im on
top of the world.
Less than three years later I was dead broke and lost my house. I was worse than dead
broke. I was probably over a million in debt. And I had no friends. I lost them all.
Then I did it again. And again, and again. And each time I let it give birth to an uglier
and uglier failure.
So I had to redefine it for myself. What does success mean to me now? Simply an
ability to pursue the Daily Practice I outlinehttp://bit.ly/fuiRS9). I dont want houses, or
boats, or big vacations. I want FREEDOM http://bit.ly/jxlS1s. Freedom to pursue my
passions, to spend time with my daughters and wife, to get in shape, to stay
emotionally healthy (which means 100% surrounding myself with uplifting people), to
be mentally healthy (the ability and time to write), and spiritually healthy (the ability to
read and have time and reduce my desire for all the toys that success in America
usually implies).
I want to die when Im an old man knowing I was successful at these four items. I want
freedom to know I have enough, to be able to be fully present and enjoy each moment
without worries.
That is success. You never fully get there, it is a process. Were in a world where
eventually everything deteriorates and dies. But, at the same time, I hope I get closer
to success every day.

If there was a shortcut to success, what would it be?

@kehindabajo
The best short cut to success is to avoid failure. Do what you can to avoid getting sick,
avoid doubt, avoid vacillation, avoid being negligent to your responsibilities, avoid being
dull (lacking any momentum), avoid being lazy (hard for me), avoid cravings that are
unhealthy for you or impossible to achieve, try to avoid having misperceptions about
what society tells you is TRUTH. It is not.

What are the antidotes to these obstacles to success? Tell the truth as much as you
can. And harm nobody. Thats the beginning. Then every day, save a life.

What is the sixth law of power and how important is it?

@justinjmoses
When I answered this I was, and still am, assuming the question is referring to that
book Power: The 48 Laws of Power. I dont like that book. I think many of the laws
are about building yourself up at the expense of others.
Success is not a zero-sum game; else we would still be back in the dark ages. You are
most successful when your one overriding thought is how can I bring the most success
to others.
Thats the one law of power that everyone needs.
But, Ill answer the question: the Sixth Law of Power in the book is to court attention
wherever you possibly can.
This is not so bad, relative to some of the other laws in the book.
However, you cant court attention for the sake of courting attention. Everthing you do
has to provide value. If you write a blog post, if you tweet, if you perform a service,
deliver value. Dont even think of doing something without asking first, What value am
I providing?
So, for instance, Im courting attention by compiling this book. By doing the Twitter
Q&As, by writing blog-posts. Im trying to court a lot of attention. Some of it is for ego
purposes probably. Some of it is so people think of me when potential opportunities
arise. I dont deny I have selfish purposes.
But first and foremost, deliver value. That really should be the sixth law of power. And
then, if the value is real and helps people, attention happens automatically.

JOBS
Is it ever too late to escape from Corporate America? Even for a
serious career change? GoldenStLiberty
Absolutely not. In fact, if you are asking that question then you already know the
answer.
Heres the thing about Corporate America
A) your boss usually sucks and someone eventually stabs you in the back. Its
inevitable.
B)

fluorescent lights (why are fluorescent lights so annoying?)

C)

50% of your income is taxed

D)

between commuting and working it is usually a 10 to 11 hour a day process

E)

your mind and creative abilities start to atrophy. And maybe you get out of shape.

F) Its not safe. We used to think that Corporate America met safe, rising jobs,
promotions, salaries, life savings, etc. 2008 showed us that was all a lie. Heck, 100,000
people lost their life savings when GM went bust. GM was the most solid company in
the world 20 years ago. So dont count on any corporation to tuck you in bed at night
and sing you a lullaby. Corporate America is not Mary Poppins, its the Exorcist.
So if you even have a semblance of desire to get out of it, you must start planning your
exit. You dont have to do it in a day. But set the forces in motion:
START COMING UP WITH IDEAS ABOUT WHAT ELSE YOU CAN DO. It might mean
multiple streams of income instead of just one. It might mean freelance. But get your
idea muscle in motion. You need to exercise it because it already atrophied. Ten ideas a
day for six months and write down what all the next steps of each idea are. Eventually
you will be an idea machine. The corporation will get scared because they will see it on
you. This has happened to me. They will keep promoting you and raising your salary

because they will be afraid to lose you. But they have already lost you.
WOW, THAT WAS A BIG POINT. I need another point here just to point that out.
IF YOU HAVE TO, GET READY TO DOWNSIZE. You dont need to live in NYC, for
instance, if youre not going to be working at the big bank anymore. And cash is king.
Dont buy a house. Save your cash.
MY OWN EXPERIENCE: I left corporate America working as a programmer at HBO in
order to build a company making websites http://bit.ly/erAKRa. It was brutal at first.
Then a few years later I had a job offer at a huge investment bank. No way suckers! I
turned that down so I could have a miserable few years day trading for hedge funds
until I built Stockpickr.com. Not every day of life on your own will be a happy one. But
the challenges will be different and you will be your own boss. And you might go broke.
Who cares! At least you know you can do it again and again. Not everytime you have
sex there are fireworks right over your house. But you still go back the next day and
beg and plead for more (oh wait, maybe thats just me).

I have a trouble finding a job, although I got an MBA in US,

worked in China for 7 years, trilingual, trying hard on networking.
-@Jacquelinexu
Clearly you are qualified for anything. You can be a congresswoman or a janitor. You
can be a hedge fund trader or a secretary for the vice-president of manufacturing at a
local ball-bearings company. You can be a stewardess on Shanghai Air or you can be an
expert on Chinese import-exports. Anything.
So why arent people hiring you?
Its a hard world out there. In a hard world the way to stand out is to help other people
stand out and succeed. Its hard for them also.
Between your MBA and your 7 years in China you must know A LOT of people.
Heres what I would do if I were you:

A)
Every day, get your coffee, and start thinking about two people you can introduce
to each other and why. How their lives would benefit if they met.
Then introduce them. It will take about ten minutes. After 20 days you wouldve helped
40 people improve their lives. One of those people is going to have a job for you.
Another idea. And this is one that Ive seen applied repeatedly over the past two years
and its driven opportunities to many people:
B)
Organize a dinner. Be prepared to spend about $1000+ or find a sponsor for the
dinner. Do it at a nice restaurant. Call it Chinese-American Business Awareness dinner.
Invite everyone you can think of: include media, investors, business owners, and your
colleagues from business school. Even get a speaker if you can.
As the center of this, all the attention comes on you. This is the most powerful
networking tool out there but many wont do it out of shyness or lack of interest in
spending the money on paying for 30 bottles of wine, food, plus tip. But this will make
you stand out for sure. When you are the source, all good things flow back to you.
C)
Blog every day about another person who has taken advantage of his or her
Chinese-American knowledge and how valuable the intersection of that knowledge is.
For instance, Robin Li was a lowly worker at Dow Jones in the US. Came up with a
search engine idea. Felt it was too competitive here, so went back to China to create
Baidu. Have some big stories (Robin Li) and some small stories, people weve never
heard of. Again, you become the source. We all follow the source.
Try these for a while. Also try some of the ideas I suggest in Nine Ways to Be a SuperConnector

I wake up every morning and am positive for about 30 seconds

and then the tick list of everything negative creeps in,
suggestion? @ScottVanEpps
I do this also. Heres what I do:
LABEL EACH THOUGHT: USEFUL, NOT USEFUL. Try to do that for as long as you
can. I recommend this in The Power of Negative Thinking. Youll find that a lot of
those negative thoughts are not useful and you move on quickly. In fact, I just

realized this second I was thinking of a not useful angry thought about something
someone sent me on an email (usually the ones closest to you are the ones that know
how to push your buttons) and I had to do the not useful thing a few times before
continuing this answer.
UNDERSTAND THAT MOST THINGS YOUVE EVER WORRIED ABOUT, DIDNT COME
TRUE. Ive worried about stuff for the past 15 years at 3 in the morning. Almost
everything I ever worried about didnt come true, or, had a solution long before it
became a problem. If you do the daily practice, and take care of the four basic areas of
life it focuses on, you will be able to fight the problems long before they come to
fruition.
ASSUME THE WORST CASE SCENARIO. What happens then? Really picture it. I know
its bad. But you will survive and move on. Sometimes the worst cases scenario is
unimaginable. But if it doesnt involve our own death, we usually can figure it out and
move on and well still laugh at a funny movie and the best we can to the people
around us if they will still have us. And if they dont, then we go on to new adventures.

How do you do things you hate but have to do? @liewmomo

There are a couple of answers now that I think more of it.
A) Each day limit the things you do that you hate. If you hate talking to your boss, for
instance, then either talk less to your boss (no social chit-chat, no extra brown-nosing
chats, etc.) or Quit Your Job http://bit.ly/ipsmoi. If you dont want to go to a wedding
then just dont go.
B)
If you absolutely have to do something you despise, then learn something from it.
Sergey Brin says he can tell in a few seconds of an interview if he is going to hire
someone. But he cant just leave the interview. So he makes sure he learns at least one
thing. I often dont want to go into New York City for meetings. But I always make sure
theres at least one adventure along the way.
C)
Stop hating so much? There are two sides to the equation: theres the thing you
have to do and theres the thing you hate. In the above two items we deal with how
you can change what you do. But can we also change what you hate? Why do you hate
it? For everything you hate, can you list some positives? I hate going on a plane. But
the positive is that Ill have an adventure in a new place. I hate when people make bad

comments on any of my articles. But the positive is that I know Im deeply affecting
them and that something inside of them is forcing them to respond in a hateful way.
Suddenly it becomes a pleasure to get these comments. I used to hate dating. But I
knew eventually, with quantity, I would meet someone with quality.

How did you go from HBO to Hedge Funds? @Hamzah81

I worked at HBO and then I inappropriately hired myself to HBOs website. It was a
success. Other companies started hiring me to do their websites because they wanted
HBOs flavor. Eventually I had to quit HBO, had millions in revenues, and sold the
company.
The company I sold to was for stock. That stock multiplied by 10 and I was able to sell
a lot. Then, thinking I was a genius I bought every internet stock I could find and
watched them all go to zero. I lost $15 million dollars. So I had to rebuild. I was
depressed and losing my home.
I wrote software to take my emotions out of the equation. The software traded
automatically. The basic idea is that when a stock fell 20% or more in a day, it was
usually good for a 6% pop over the next few days. I tested this statistically and it
worked for me throughout all of 2001 and 2002. I sent my ideas to a few hedge fund
managers and they decided to trust me with their money in managed accounts.
Note: I had no experience making websites, no experience in TV, no experience in
trading, and no experience in writing for financial media. But I did it anyway. Nobody
was going to tell me not to. I would not have listened.

What balance should we have in life between: learning by reading

or watching others / learning by doing? @HarrisonAmy
Always 50-50. For example, when I write, I read for 2-3 hours first, and then write for
2-3 hours. When I start a business, I read every book I can about successful
entrepreneurs and I spend time networking as much as possible with other startup
entrepreneurs.
Even when I was dating, I spent part of each day researching dating (i.e. sending out
messages on dating services, for instance) thinking about how I can make a date
better, etc. And then, of course, the other part of each day actually dating.

@HarrisonAmy then asked me how I know when Im off balance. The way I know is if I
have a hard time coming up with new ideas. If I feel the flow is missing. I spend part
of each day trying to come up with ideas for myself on whatever Im interested in. If
Im too distracted or not thinking of enough good ideas then I know Im off balance.

Is being married to work really a bad thing when you are young.
Do I really have a lot of time to find my life partner? @niketdesai
Its very important to be married to work when you are young. To develop ideas and
have a passion that takes you beyond the competition (the rest of society). Too many
people spend their 20s chasing simple and easy pleasures without regard to their own
health and without regard to building up so that later in life they can pursue more
fruitful pursuits.
Also, looking at the divorce rate of people who are married in their 20s its often better
to be married to your work than to be married to a human.
On My Favorites
Several people asked me my favorites on a variety of topics so I supply them here:
FAVORITE COMEDIAN: Louis CK and Jim Norton couldnt be more different from each
other. But I love them both. Jim Norton I went to school with and I wrote a detailed
post about it http://bit.ly/q6ywyT. The other, Louis CK, I have probably watched every
episode hes been on TV (in the HBO series, Lucky Louie which also featured Norton,
and in his new series Louie, which is much better) and Ive watched every YouTube
clip with him.
FAVORITE VONNEGUT BOOK: Slaughterhouse Five. The most autobiographical it
details Vonneguts experiences in Dresden during and after the fire bombing that
destroyed the entire city. It shakes up Vonneguts spirit to the point where the main
character cant even stay fixed in time. The book is surreal and I think represents
Vonneguts purest voice and philosophy.
FAVORITE FREAKS N GEEKS EPISODE: The 14th episode. Dead Dogs and Gym
Teachers. Specifically the scene at the end when Bill is crying because he cant handle
the fact that his mom is going out with the coach of the school. Bill is the ultimate geek

and he scorned the coach and everything he stood for. I related to Bill and felt like
crying when he was crying. Also, the first scene where food is falling out of his mouth
while he is laughing at Garry Shandling (one of my favorite comedians) is classic.
FAVORITE BOOK ABOUT SOFTWARE: You dont have to be a programmer to appreciate
Joel on Software by Joel Spolsky or Hackers & Painters by Paul Graham. Both guys
are (or started as) programmers, built up successful business and learned how to apply
their programming skills to deeper issues in both business and life. I recommend both.
FAVORITE BUSINESS BOOK: The Rational Optimist by Matt Ridley is the perfect book
for business. It shows with science and sound reasoning why the doom-and-gloomers
will always be wrong. Economic development has saved country after country from the
disasters of infant mortality, illiteracy, war, terrorism, and so on. I also like The Science
of Getting Rich written in 1900 by Wallace Wattles.
FAVORITE BEATLES SONG: While My Guitar Gently Weeps by George Harrison, the
most underrated Beatle and perhaps songwriter among the four. Even the title is like
an entire poem by itself.
FAVORITE SUPERHERO: Dr. Strange, of course. Not only is he the Sorcerer Supreme
but he cleans up on women. I mean, look at Clea. And he has magical powers that can
basically do anything: teleport, create exotic food fishes, heal people. He can also astral
project, something Ive wanted to do since I was 12. And hes got a guy named Wong
who is a master or martial arts who is his assistant.

What are your tips for interviewing? I always seem to choke up

and get performance anxiety. @unionkane
Before an interview:
PREPARE. Know everything you can about the history of the business you are
interviewing for. How did it start? What is the backgrounds of the founders? What were
the goals of the business? How have they changed? When has the business faltered in
the past? With any large company you can always find this out. Make sure you do.
BECOME THE COMPANY. In a science fiction sense you want to mind-meld with the
company. Its as if you were the company so the ideas you start to come up with are
ideas that will better the company. This will shine through in the interview.

BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE WITH EXTRA KNOWLEDGE. If you are interviewing for a
smaller company it might not be so easy to do the above, but you can always know the
competitors. Be familiar with the ups and downs in the industry.
Performance anxiety in an interview is similar to anxiety in any performance it is
100% related to low confidence. You build confidence through knowledge and practice.
VISUALIZE. Before the interview, visualize the entire interview in your head. Bring up all
the points you studied about the industry. Imagine yourself talking about what your
role will be. Bring up ideas you have. Play with it, see yourself doing great. Make it fun,
visualize hearing an offer beyond your wildest dreams, make it big, make it successful,
then let it all go.
EXCERSISE. This reduces anxiety and helps you focus. The one draw-back is that it
could make you tired. Therefore, once you exercise, build the mind muscles back up by
coming up with 10 ideas for the business. Brand new ideas, ones you have not thought
of before. Even if its interviewing to work as a shoe store salesman, make sure you
understand every brand out there, how the store can use social media to drive
customers, etc.
GOOGLE IT. You can usually get the names of the people you are going to meet in the
interview process. Of course, use Google to find out everything about them. Again, the
overriding consideration is that knowledge builds confidence which reduces anxiety.
Exercise also reduces anxiety.
FINALLY, SURRENDER. It is very important to have a feeling of Okay, Ive done all I
can. Its in your hands now. Whatever will be will be, I trust that what is best for all
concerned will be the outcome.
Having a feeling of surrender and humility, and a sense that theres a higher power
(even if you call it something as silly as The Force) will help reduce anxiety.
NOW GO GET THE JOB. Dont think about the past (fired from prior jobs) or the future
(if I dont get this job then Im lost). These are not useful thoughts. Try to catch
yourself in the middle of a not-useful thought (it takes practice) and see if you can
replace it with its opposite. Stay rooted in the present moment, flow with it.

How can you set yourself from the competition in a job interview?
Be as honest as possible about all of your failures. Everyone can relate to your failures.
Everyone else is saying how great they are. [REALY?/ I AM THINKING HERE IN LINE
WITH THE BOOK ON HOW GOOGLE INTERVIEWS WE JUST READ, ARE WE SURE WE
WANT TO HIGHLIGHT OUR MITAKES? OR DO WE WANT TO BE OUR BEST IN AN
INTERVIEW I WOULD BE CAREFUL WITH THIS ONE] Youre saying how horrible you
are. Make it funny. Youve fallen in mud like a slapstick comedian. Thats funny. If you
can laugh at yourself, solve your problems, and still show up at the job interview, then
youve separated yourself out from the competition.
Youre a failure.
And youre a winner.
Congrats, you got the job.

How do you get so much energy to do the things you do?

@yoda_2little
Energy is a bit overrated. The key thing is to spend as little energy as possible and still
get things done. Why would you want to spend little energy? Because everything you
do in the outside world gives you little time to tend to the gardens that are inside your
world, inside your mind, inside your body.
So the first thing is to spend less energy digesting food. Skip dinner (so your body is
not trying to digest when you sleep), go to sleep early, dont expose yourself to news,
avoid pop culture, dont drink alcohol, try to only be around the people you love, and
have a sense of surrender and gratitude.
This may seem like you are sterilizing your life. But its quite the opposite. When you
have leftover energy to do whatever you want, then you have more possibilities than
ever.
Sometimes I can pull this off. Sometimes I cant. But Im always trying.

Been a stay at home housewife for 8 years and want to go back to

work badly but feel defeated and hopeless about finding a job.
How do I get out of funk? @mainlinewife
I obviously do not have direct experience with this but, that doesnt stop me from
offering advice. First off, being a stay at home housewife seems embedded in how
you view yourself. Your twitter handle is mainlinewife and your name associated
with the handle is Main Line Housewife.
We need to break you free from the identity you have created for yourself, from the
cage you have put yourself in, from the boundaries you have personally drawn around
you, like a kid playing with chalk on the playground during recess: Nobody can walk in
these lines!
Second, congratulations on everything youve done. Obviously spending eight years
devoted to raising children is a heroic and underrated task in our society. People
shower credit on Mark Zuckerberg and make movies about him but the blood, sweat,
and tears of making a brand new human being a responsible member of society is often
forgotten.
Now back to your question, it takes work to get back into the job world. You need the
confidence, the health, the idea engine, the spiritual engine, all working for you again.
The idea muscles atrophy as quickly as any other muscle.
Most important: you need to exercise every day. And you need to write ideas down
every day. Write ten ideas a day, about anything under the sun: ideas for jobs you can
do, ideas for how you can help people, ideas for articles you can write, specific ideas on
businesses you can start.
Assume that for one month you will only come up with bad ideas. Thats ok. But give it
three to six months and everything will be different. Particularly if your other
relationships are more or less smooth, and physically you stay/get in shape. The key is
to not lapse back into thinking, Damn, I cant do this. Im just a housewife. In which
case, follow the advice in Being Unpredictable Will Free You http://bit.ly/uAjea8.
Find a moment today to finger-paint. Or swim. Or take a walk by yourself. Or respondto
an email from 1999. Do something that will take you out of your normal routine for 2
minutes. Thats all it takes. What happens then? Who knows? The miraculous.

How do you know when the time is right to take the plunge, quit
your job and focus on your own business? What about family
risks? @adamclay211
What is a risk? I met someone the other day who worked for 38 years at GM. He was a
middle-manager so he had no golden parachute (he wasnt a high level executive) and
he had no bronze parachute (he wasnt a union member). Net result: he lost his life
savings, his job, his savings.
There is no corporate safety. The risk to your family is you becoming inbred in your
corporate job. You must leave, just as I recommend in the post 10 Reasons You Have
to Quit Your Job Right Now! http://bit.ly/fpBXNZ.
That said, dont go crazy. Make sure you are smart and jumping to something better
than you are leaving.
If you are going to a startup, you are investing not cash (which comes and goes), but
your entire life, your dreams, your skill sets, your soul. In other words, do your due
diligence.
Heres a sample checklist:
A) Talk to clients. Are they happy?
B) What are the backgrounds of the heads of sales?
C) Has the CEO built and sold a business before and taken care of his employees in
the process?
D) Does the company have at least 1 years cash?
E) What are their plans for future rounds of fundraising?
F) Who are the current investors on the board? Do they have deep pockets to keep
funding the company?
G) Is the company squarely positioned in what you feel is a strong demographic
trend?
H) Has the company proven its flexibility (i.e. has it already had a chance to learn
from its mistakes)

GOING BROKE
What did you do to make money after you went broke?
@ScottEPowers
Several things:
DOWNSIZED. I had to sell my house. I severely downsized. I went from a 4,500 square
foot penthouse to a 1,400 square foot house 70 miles north and I cut my expenses by
75%.
I HAD TO GET IN SHAPE. I worked out every day, I emotionally stopped dealing with
people who were dragging me down, I made lists of ideas every day, and I either
meditated or read from various spiritual or inspirational texts each day. I knew it was
going to be a tough battle to climb back up so I did everything I could to prepare.
I IMMEDIATELY STARTED WRITING ABOUT FINANCE TO GENERATE INCOME. Within a
few months I had a book deal and I was writing for TheStreet.com and The Financial
Times.
I WAS DAYTRADING and that was doing well back then (2002-05). I dont think day
trading is practical now but it was then.
I STARTED TRADING FOR HEDGE FUNDS, then I started helping people sell their
companies, then I started a fund of hedge funds. One day at the time, as the ideas I
wrote began to flourish I got back into the game.
I STARTED STOCKPICKR.COM http://bit.ly/qV3Q5E which I sold to TheStreet.com.
There was a six year period where nobody was paying my salary and I had to hustle for
every dollar. But that proved to me that no matter how bad the economy gets, if youre
the one eyed man (the optimist) in the land of the blind (the pessimists) then you will
find the ways to make money even if we are in a Depression.

Have you ever given up on yourself? @bluenextbear

Yes, this is a perpetual problem I have, and maybe many people have: I give up on
myself every day. I wake up, and I have to make sure my first thoughts are not
negative thoughts. I get angry. And anger is just a small shade on the spectrum of
emotions away from fear. So I usually get scared next http://bit.ly/o9MBAx. Then I
have to go to the bathroom. Fast.
But when Im done with that, the key is how to get back on track. I try to practice an
ongoing meditation, labeling thoughts as I catch them: useful or not useful. Any
anger or fear thoughts or thoughts of, I cant do this go in the not useful bucket.
Then I begin my normal practices of the day. Exercising the idea muscle, writing,
exercising. And so on.
Every day is a battle. Even if you have confidence one day, there are so many forces in
the world (media, news, pop culture, family, enemies, bosses, colleagues, etc. etc. etc.)
that are trying to bring you down that you need in your tool chest a daily method of
performing surgery on yourself so that if you do give up, even if its just for a moment,
you have a way of coming back from the abyss.
In a black hole theres something called the event horizon. Once you enter that
perimeter there is no escape and you are sucked into the black hole. There is no way
possible for anything to comeback once its in that zone. The same thing applies when
giving up on yourself. You have to pull yourself back before you are sucked into that
zone. Dont entertain it, dont dance with it, and dont feed that feeling. You must say
not useful and move on. Continue with the incremental implementation of your plan,
discussed above.

OPTIMISM
Do you think optimism and being positive even if you fail, and
start again, and fail will make you succeed? @catalin357
This is a trick question because the answer is both yes and no.
You need rational optimism. If I say to myself, damn, I failed to make that time
travel machine but Im optimistic my next try will be it! then Im doomed to fail.
How do you be a rational optimist?
BE REALISTIC. Its like the question where I describe coming up with ideas. Make sure
you have realistic ideas, make sure you have a concrete next step, make sure you have
an idea in your mind how you can get your first customers and users. If you can get a
commitment for a customer even before you build, then that is the best scenario.
UNDERSTAND THAT SOME THINGS ARE OUT OF YOUR CONTROL. Having a sense of
surrender, okay, I did all I could. Its in your hands now will help you to have an
optimistic, flexible, and persistent outlook on life. If you just say, Ugh, I did everything
I could and I failed and now thats it then of course, thats it!
WHO IS THE YOU IN ITS IN YOUR HANDS NOW. It might be your own creativity and
flexibility that wants to get out and help you on your next idea. That creativity is a
sleeping monster and it never gets smaller if you keep feeding it, nurturing it, loving it,
taking care of it. Persistence in developing that creativity will make you better at
execution, better at idea generation, and more optimistic (simply because over time you
will be more confident that you can always awaken it). Creativity becomes your loving
friend instead of your enemy. And optimism, creativity, and persistence are all close
siblings that want to play together as much as possible.

MONEY
With Europe about to default, high employment, gold (the
ultimate fear metal) on the rise, why should anyone still be
bullish? @ginger_gal
Fact: right now the top 5 banks in the US have 3% exposure to European debt. (How
can this be? Because China is buying up all the European debt in their attempt to take
over the financial planet.
In 1981 all of South America was in default. The top 5 banks in the US had 263%
exposure to their debt. We had 17% inflation/bond yields. Millions of jobs were being
lost because of the high rates and inflation. And we had the Soviet Union with
thousands of hydrogen bombs pointed at your home. Not to mention the revolution in
Iran, unrest in India, Pakistan, Israel, etc.
And yet what happened: a two decade boom?
Ignore world politics, ignore the government statistics, ignore the headlines which try to
make you scared, ignore the pundits who sell newsletters based on fear and greed.
They are all out to scam you. If you are putting your hopes and future happiness on
the thought that the world is going to end youre going to be dead wrong.

What would be your strategy to get wealthy? @djmainevent

I think a lot of people get lucky on the road to wealth. They build some company in a
hot space, and they sell it for an ungodly high number. Think Bebo, which got bought
by AOL for a billion and then sold for $10 million a year or so later. Those founders got
fabulously wealthy.
But for the rest of us that wont happen.
The real way to get wealth is to find a customer and perform a service for that
customer. Then repeat. My first company found a customer (a company that needed a
website) and built the website for that customer. Then we found another customer and

built that website. And word of mouth spread and before you knew it we were making
websites for dozens of companies. I also always made sure I delivered at least one
extra feature that the company didnt ask for.
One way to get a customer is to help other companies get customers and you charge
for that service. If you live by a bunch of gyms, put up Facebook ads for those gyms
and then charge them for every customer that walks through the door, for instance.
But, you must get the idea muscle in shape. The idea muscle is like any other muscle.
Within 2-3 weeks of no use it atrophies. If you dont use your legs for two weeks you
wont be able to work. Same thing here.
So every day get to work. Come up with ideas. For yourself, for others, for other
companies. Give it a few weeks before you suspect that you might be in shape. Then a
few months before youre ready to start sharing your ideas.
At this point your ideas will be good enough to help other people make money. When
you make other people make money, then you will make money. Then you repeat that
and its a business.
Dont forget that when you come up with an idea, the idea is no good unless you also
have the next step and perhaps even the next step after that. Anyone can come up
with the idea: I want to set up a small airline between every city in the New
York/Connecticut region. But what would the next steps be? Can you do them? This is a
gut check to make sure your idea is realistic enough to pursue, whether its for yourself
or others.

Is greed good? @tradefast

The phrase greed is good has become a clich for periods of excess like the 80s or
the mid 00s, where real characters like Ivan Boesky or fictional characters like Gordon
Gekko use it as an excuse for their own illegal activities.
However, dont believe the hype. Dont just watch TV or read the newspaper headlines
and nod your head with everyone else: They are all out to get me with their stupid
greed.
I have greed to make money. I want to feed my family. I want them to have shelter. I

want to be able to afford if they get sick. Furthermore, I might want to start new
companies, or create new jobs, or work on other ideas and innovations instead of
working as a salesclerk in the Verizon store (as the guy who caught Derek Jeters ball
did, and he then handed the ball back for free instead of taking the potential $250,000
offered).
Greed is good if you are good.

BEING STUCKED
How Can I Get Un-Stucked?
A lot of people get stuck. They dont like where they are at. They dont know how to
move forward. They dont know how to shake things up. I dont know if this is true but
one time a friend of mine told me (he got his PHd at the age of 15 so I believed
everything he told me about science) that the way Bic makes lighters is by putting all
the parts in a machine and then the machine shakes until the parts somehow all fit
together into lighters and the lighters start falling out.
I dont know if this is true. But I love the idea.
A lot of people are stuck. I know this because I get emails that start, Im stuck. So
how to get unstuck. Put all your parts in a machine. Start shaking.
Even when I was stuck I couldnt accurately say I had specific complaints. I had an ok
job, good boss, ok colleagues, easy responsibilities. Summers were easy when everyone
took a vacation (and on that note: how bad are vacations? Much better when you get
to sit around and do nothing than go off to Hawaii or Alaska, battle airplanes, hotels,
hiking (ugh!), feeding kids, etc). So what was my problem?
Nothing was my problem. Its ok to be stuck. Nobody will ever blame you for it. But
youll get less and less happy. Then things start to happen that you didnt intend, in
order to get you unstuck. Maybe you have an affair to mix things up. Maybe you steal a
little from the office. Maybe you start to cut corners at work because youve been there
long enough you know you can let things slide. You start gossiping too much about the
other people. You begin the arduous process of backstabbing to rise up in a world that
will tease you into thinking thats how you get unstuck.
But it isnt. And being stuck has its consequences. Heres the ten step guide to being
unstuck:
LIST YOUR ROUTINE. Dont leave a single detail out. When you are stuck it means you
have a rigid routine that rarely changes. Here was part of my routine: Wake up, brush
teeth, wait for cold subway, ride subway, get a donut and coffee, go to cubicle without

anyone seeing me, log onto email, read stuff on the web, play a game of chess, make
my list of things to do, start programmingflirtgossipkiss ass..lunch.coffee
break.chess break.dinner.shoot pool, etc. I had about 50 things on my Routine
List. Put 60 if you can.
CHANGE ONE THING: in the routine. The idea is to only change one thing at a time.
Dont be too hard on yourself. One thing. And dont do the exact opposite. Just avoid
the item in the routine you want to change. Maybe, dont go straight to work. Go to the
library. Or wake up one hour early and read a book. Or jog around the block even if you
have never jogged before. Or dont read your emails this morning. Or completely stop
gossiping. Or sit with different people at lunch. Over time, how many things on your
routine list can you change? Half? All of it? Make it a daily challenge. Break your record.
Break my record.
INSTEAD OF WRITING A THINGS-TO-DO LIST, WRITE A THINGS I DID LIST AT THE
END OF THE DAY. In fact, start to reverse your routine. Read emails at the end of the
day. Have dinner for breakfast. Breafast for dinner.
FIND ONE THING YOU WERE PASSIONATE ABOUT AS A KID: spend an hour
researching what has happened since. For instance, I was passionate about Jacques
Cousteau for about a month as a kid. What ever happened to that guy? I couldnt tell
you right now if he was dead or alive or buried in some sex scandal. He put out a
bunch of books about what goes on underwater. Whats happened since? Why do this?
You were a kid for 18 years. There were probably many things that you were
passionate about. Even if it was as silly as some cartoon show. Each thing you find out
about is something new you learn now. And you might find things you are still
passionate about.
NETWORK: Every day find one person to reach out to and stay in touch with. An old
high school friend. A guy you randomly spoke to on the subway. The guy on the
elevator. Go out to lunch with this person. Learn about his life. Interview him. You need
to find out what other routines are like. Maybe someone will give you an idea you
havent thought of. We are all very very afraid to break out of our routines. I am also. I
recently agreed to do a media appearance simply because I was afraid if I said no
then the people there would not like me. Claudia begged me not to do it. I did it
anyway. She was right. I was afraid to break out of my routine. But networking that
day wouldve probably put me more in touch with people who liked me than doing that
media appearance did. Again, return the email from 2005 that you never returned.

Write a letter to your bosss bosss bosss boss and tell him what you really think about
the companys strategy in Kansas.
CREATE. I can tell by the emails I get that most people would rather create something
than be a part of the robotic routine. How can you create if you have no time or if you
have never done it before? Simple! Dont worry about either of those things. On the
subway write a 4 line poem. Buy a set of watercolors in the drug store and finger paint
for ten minutes before you go to sleep. Dont write a things to do list or a things you
did list. Write a things I wish I did today list. Make up stuff for that list. I wish a UFO
picked me up, took me to Andromeda, and then took me home for dinner. Its your wish
list for the day that just happened. Its all over. So you can wish for anything. It didnt
happen. You are making stuff up. Youre creating.
Heres another thing: follow someone. I love doing this! Pick a random person and just
follow them for fifteen minutes. Youre an evil spy! Then you can see their routine.
Make sure they dont see you follow them. (See, Nine Ways to Light Your Creativity On
Fire).
DAILY PRACTICE. Im a broken record already. Heres why the Daily Practice I
recommend works: (note: what this is my personal belief about how the world and
universe is set up. You dont have to believe it. But I know it works for me). I firmly
believe we have four bodies and most of the time we are neglecting at least 2 or 3 of
them if not all 4. If you neglect your physical body, you start to have stomach
disorders, you get sick more frequently, you eventually die younger or at least have a
painful, unpleasant life. Guess what!? The same thing happens if you neglect your
emotional body. Or mental body. Or spiritual body.
And its even bigger than that. In your physical body (in all 4) theres blood that hooks
everything up. If the blood is not working, oxygen is not getting to the different parts of
your body. You might have to breathe faster then, or you might breathe irregularly, or
worse: if oxygen doesnt get to the heart or the brain then you have a heart attack or
stroke. If oxygen doesnt get properly to your cells you get cancer. The same thing
happens in all four bodies. BUT, its not only that: theres a blood that connects up each
body. If they arent all in sync then that blood flow starts to break down.
I know people dont care about all four bodies. They say to me, I love the idea muscle
idea. Or, I like your thoughts but dont really think much about spirituality. If ALL
FOUR BODIES are not in harmony with each other then they being to break down. Then
they start letting crappy people into their lives. Or they start being unable to execute on

good ideas. Or they get sick. Whatever. Many people dont like some words. Like
spiritual. Call it something else then.
And dont believe me at all on this. Im making it all up after all. But I know, for me,
this is what works. I cant break out of a routine, any routine, unless I am following this
advice. So I know it works for me. And I know it works for the people who read that
blog post a year ago because I get their emails. Ive gotten well over 1000 emails on
how peoples lives have changed. Im not saying this because I am trying to sell you
anything. Im not selling anything at all. In fact, better for me to succeed if less
people follow my advice. But whatever, it works for me.
BUY ALL MY BOOKS. Haha. Im just kidding. I just told you Im not selling anything.
But, seriously, buy my last book.
WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? Sometimes a routine is a person. I wake up..did she
write me?its 11amhas she called?did she say she loved me yesterday?how come
she didnt make plans yet for this weekend with meshe said she would be here at 7
but she hasnt even called and its 8etc. Maybe this routine is particular to me. But
ask: why might I have a routine like that (in the past). List your reasons: fear of being
alone. A parent telling me I was disgusting when I was youger. Experiences of other
women cheating if its 8 and they said 7.
Fear that I will never meet someone like her again (a statement which is always said
but never true). Sexual obsession. Love addiction. On an on. You break the routine by
being aware of the fears: Ill never get a job this good again. Ill fail as an entrepreneur.
Ill run out of money and have to move. I dont know any rich people to help me. On
and on. Theres excuse after excuse of why you shouldnt break your routine.
List all of those excuses. Think about them. Think of the opposite (well, Ive always
met a girl within six months after a big breakup so I will probably meet one again or,
I havent lived in a homeless shelter yet so odds are I wont this time.
But I cant change them!? You might say. I really want this girl! Or..I really might go
broke! Thats ok. Think them.
Heres how you wither them away, like the water against a rock metaphor:
i. become aware of the excuses.

ii. figure out why they exist. What part of your psychological timeline do they come
from.
iii. where in your body do you feel pain when you think of them. Just think about that.
iv. Whats the reverse of that fear. I really had to say to myself, I will meet a woman I
will fall in love with if I leave this girl. I had to say it over and over. If I didnt say it, I
never wouldve left the girl. I never wouldve met the right girl. If you dont say it, you
wont believe it. I had to say, if I start a company I wont go broke.
v. Visualize now what you just said in part iv. Lie down. Put your hands by your side.
Take ten deep breaths. And really visualize the situation. You will meet the girl. Your
business will be a success.
You might say, thats sort of new agey. Ok. Dont do it then. All Im saying is: this is
how I broke my routines. All of them. Every time. Even micro-routines.
Then repeat from i tomorrow.
I eventually climbed out of bed and told my boss I quit. He said, Can you please wait
until I get back from vacation in 3 weeks? But I said no and sent in my resignation. I
eventually stopped calling back the girl when it was clear she didnt like me. I
eventually stopped gossiping about the people who clearly hated me. I never ended up
in a homeless shelter despite repeated attempts for the universe to put me there.
Waking up at 7 am, lying there until 10am. The sunlight coming in and filling the room
when everyone was busy doing their routine and I was too afraid to move. Sometimes
Im still too afraid to move. But sometimes the good thing about too much sunlight is
that eventually it leads to an entirely new day.

PERFECTIONISM
How do you deal with perfection? Many times I feel I cant
execute ideas until I know it 100%. @socialhotchoco
Perfectionism only leads to eventual shame or regret. Nobody is perfect, and theres
always the chance of the unknown occurring in every work. And, when the perfectionist
loses control of an event, project, business, etc. then what happens? Shame results.
Embarrassment with colleagues, friends, bosses, investors, and family.
A very public example is Madoff. At some point he started his hedge fund and lost some
money. He was a perfectionist. He couldnt handle telling people that he lost money.
Everyone thought he was an investment genius. The result: a massive Ponzi scheme as
he attempted to cover up his imperfections and still be the genius everyone thought
he was.
So my advice: if you have an idea for a project: Start it. Start it right now. Spec out the
minimal features you need, hire a programmer (use Scriptlance), or find a customer,
and just get started. Even if you are not 100% ready.
As an example: I have an idea for a novel. I dont have the full plot outlined. I dont
even know if I will have the time to finish. But today Im going to start it. Ill write just
500 words for it. It doesnt have to be perfect (thats what rewriting is for), but well
see what happens.

How do I deal with anxiety about not being perfect at everything

I do? @paramkamal
Giving yourself permission to be imperfect is the key to all flexibility and success. Think
of the first time you tried to touch your toes. You couldn't do it. Too inflexible. [MAYBE
A DIFFERENT ANALOGY OR MAYBE TELL US ABOUT YOGA I CAN TOUCH MY TOES
EASILY, ALL I HAVE TO DO IS BEND MY KNEES ! WE TALKED ABOUT IT]
But with time, you get a millimeter closer each day. Then it's painful. But with time, you
wiggle into it. Now you go for more. You put your hands on your feet. You twist

towards the ceiling. You open up your muscles. You open up your mind. But it all
started with small imperfections that you conquered day by day.

GOALS AND ADVICE

How important is having a plan if you want to get anywhere in
life? @djmainevent
It is very important to have a plan. For instance, lets say you want to be able to bench
press 200 lbs. (Im making this up, obviously. I never want to be able to bench press
that). You wont get there randomly. You first come up with the goal (bench press 200
lbs) and then with that goal in hand you know every day how you can slightly improve
to meet that goal. How you can change your diet (more protein!), how you can get to a
gym, what increments you need to take in order to bench 200 lbs, which muscles need
to improve (theres a billion little muscles around the shoulder that have to be worked
on with different machines, etc). And so on.
I have about 8 goals that Ive written down for 2012. I look at them every day. The
goals might change. I might not stick with them. Or I might decide halfway through
that Im only going to focus on 4 of them. But each day I come up with the plan for
that day that makes incremental improvement on all 8 goals. Those incremental
improvements compound in your life exponentially the way money in a bank
accumulating interest does. Before you know it, you are rich in the sense that youve
achieved your plan. But without the plan, you are just flaying in the dark, with no
money in your mental bank.

Who do you turn to for advice? @bondtrader83

Its important to have someone you can trust and that, in just about any situation, you
can turn to for advice. Its no wonder that many great businesses are started by two
people: Google, Microsoft, Apple. For me, I turn to Claudia (Claudiayoga.com) when I
most need advice.

What would you tell the 17 year old you if you got the chance?
@JessWhat
When I was 17 all I thought about was sex, money, and chess. What an idiot. And I
had acne. I dont even have any pictures of myself at 17. Im so disgusted with what I

was. ButThere was this book on my parents bookshelf when I was a kid. I constantly
would thumb through it. It had a lot of stuff about sex in it. So that turned me on. But I
think I ignored the title and what it meant. This is what I would tell myself if I could
communicate to my 17 year old self: http://amzn.to/xXvKQ2.

Should we take advice from others? @ibrute

Never! And that includes all the advice I am giving or have ever given.
This seems like an odd answer. Im giving advice here after all. I spend an hour
answering questions on Twitter on Thursdays. Then I summarize them as posts. Not to
mention all my other posts I write. Plus the thousands of hours spent on writing books.
Dont I think people should take my advice? Do I have such a low opinion of myself that
I think people should ignore me?
In the last four paragraphs of I Was Blind But Now I See I say:

Seeing is realizing that all the wealth and success in the world is ours for the taking
once weve build the foundations within, the true freedom that lets us see the reality
and the myths around us for what they are.
It is questioning everything we do and the intentions behind them.
It is realizing that sometimes our intentions have a lot of strings attached and that not
being honest is expensive. Very expensive. These techniques, these ideas, Ive learned
the hard way. Ive succeeded on traditional terms. Ive failed on very traditional terms.
Ive been brainwashed by the Zombie Recruitment Machine. But Ive also used the
techniques in this book to now create success for myself. Nothing I suggest in this book
is without decades of exploration and experimentation. Dont take my word for it.
Now is the time for you to take your own journey. To see the world. To figure out what
you truly want, find success, wealth, freedom, happiness, and live the life you always
knew you were meant to live. Enjoy.

What is one small way to improve my day to day routine? I need

to add another positive piece to the puzzle? @randyaaron
THE DAILY PRACTICE, http://bit.ly/fuiRS9, which gives advice on how to make
improvements physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
DEVELOPING YOUR GRATITUDE MUSCLE http://bit.ly/pY3Qvs. This is perhaps the
easiest and most useful meditation: spend just two minutes thinking of the people in
your life you are grateful for. Even better, pick one out from the distant past and reach
out and tell them you are grateful.
NINE WAYS TO LIGHT YOUR CREATIVITY ON FIRE http://bit.ly/nOPi16.
Here are the nine ways: 1. List things. 2. Turn upside down. 3. Combine ideas (very
important. Ideas mate with each other). 4. Study new technology. 5. Connect people.
6. Make something. Even if you dont have any creative skills, finger paint at the very
least. It will awaken neurons you didnt know you had. 7. Leave. Go on a Staycation.
Take yourself out on a date. Go someplace youve never been before in your own town.
Ride on a swing. 8. Virtually leave. In the post I give links to some websites that I use
sometimes to kick start my creativity. 9. Seek HELP.

Whats your dream? Whats your biggest goal in life?

@valuewalk
My biggest goal is to have much fewer goals. This sounds sort of clichd but its true.
Goals are stressful. Lets say your goal is to have $100 million. Thats hard! Its stressful
to accomplish. It requires a lot of work. And then the question is: is it really necessary
to have $100 million to be happy?
Or lets say my goal is to publish a novel? Thats hard also! It will take time away from
my kids, from my wife. Its hard to make money writing fiction (you have to be either
lucky, super-talented, or super prolific, or all of the above) so you end up having to
market yourself a lot, which is stressful.
We all have to support our families. But when that goal is largely accomplished to the
best of our abilities, what other goals should we have? I dont want to lie around
watching TV all day. But I guess if you constantly seek to improve yourself physically,
emotionally, mentally, spiritually, then thats the best goal to have because thats the

goal that will keep you happy, and help those around you, and turn you into an
idea/innovation machine that will inspire others.
I hope I can get to a point where thats my only goal. Instead, I probably have too
many extra goals that are nothing but baggage I have to carry around all the time.
Someone also asked: If you had to choose between physical health and mental health,
what would you choose?
The answer (and I hope I never have to make that choice) is physical health. The
reason is: you want high quality of life into your elder years. This gives you as much
time and energy as possible to pursue the other three types of health I talk about. That
said, they are all linked (stress will decrease your physical health, for instance). And
physical health and exercise will help to keep you mentally balanced.

How do you learn to think on your feet? @socialhotchoco

Things always go wrong. All the time. When I was selling my first company, everything
went wrong. We lost clients. Our landlord refused to give approval. We forget to get
health insurance for our employees (and we had to admit that to our buyer), we were
going bankrupt if the acquisition didnt close within a month.
But every problem has a solution. Your mind has to be as flexible as possible.
Some people say, The mind gets flexible through meditation.
That only works for a few people. Not everyone can start off sitting for an hour a day
and not get totally bored or fall asleep. Meditation is not really meant for most people
(this is my opinion).
But you can train your mind to be flexible and to think fast. When I exercise muscles, I
exercise until I hurt. Until I sweat. Until I know the next day Im going to be sore.
Otherwise the exercise doesnt work.
Its the same thing with the mind. You have to every day exercise it until it hurts. Until
its sore the next day. Until you cant go on any further but you know you have to if you
want your idea muscles to be working. Idea muscles atrophy. You need to exercise
them every day to build them back up. The benefits:

A)

You will be able to think on your feet regardless of what problem comes up

B)

You will become an idea machine

C) Other people with ideas will be attracted to you. Ideas want to mate. They want to
give birth to new ideas. So people who have the idea muscles sharpened will become
evolutionarily attracted to you to get new ideas born.
Just start with this: every day take a waiters pad and write down ten ideas. Then, with
each idea, come up with the next two steps of how to get that idea done. If its a book
idea, write the outline. If its a chapter idea, write down what the chapter is about. If
its a business idea, write down some initial customers, or what the next step is on
getting the idea implemented. Hurt your head. Keep thinking on each idea until you
have to stop and say, ugh, this hurts to push any more on this idea. Do that for six
months.
Then you join the ranks of the Idea Machines.

For a 30 year old, no debt, no kid, likes job, has unneeded

$100,000 in bank earning 1%. Leave it there long term or into VTI
(the broadly diversified stock market)? @optrader0
Holy shit, Im jealous of you. Thirty years old, no responsibilities, and $100,000 in the
bank. Do you know how lucky you are?
So lets see, you have two choices:
One, put it in the bank and never worry about it.
Two, put it in the stock market where it can either go up 6% on average or some years
go down 30%. Hmmmm.
Why even consider Two? What would you have earned last year, for instance.Zero.After
going 20% down at points. What a roller coaster when you couldve just slept easy.
Cash is king. If I were you, Id stuff it under the mattress. Dont even put it in a bank
that could go under. Use some non-bank like Fidelity.

No worries, should be your slogan. And when the time is right, take $1,000-2,000 and
start your own business. If that doesnt work, then take another $1,000 and start
another business. And keep trying.
People get trigger happy when they have a loaded gun. They want to fire it. But the
best gun is the one that stays loaded. Dont risk your life for an extra ten cents.

Give me one piece of killer advice that i can use daily to make it a
successful 2012 @AJBoom
If a gun was to my head and I had to give one piece of advice (hard for me: Im like a
vomitorium of advice) it would be:
Spend more time with people who love you. You can do this at home, work, on the
internet, wherever.
Corollary: spend less time with people who dont love you.
By the way, this advie was given to me by Tucker Max, author of the book Assholes
Finish First.

COLLEGE
Should I follow my lifelong dream or go to college?
@himynameissteev
My stance on college is very clear http://bit.ly/rJDJQ2. Some people might say that your
dream will always be there but you might as well have college to fall back on.
Actually, the reverse is true. Your dream might not always be there (college has a way
of dampening dreams) and college is no longer there to fall back on.
Going to college means:
A)

Graduating with enormous debt. You become a debt slave

B)

Taking five years out of your life to get a piece of paper with your name on it

C) Spending five years NOT pursuing the things you are truly interested in. Life is
short. 5 years could be 10% of your life. Why waste this valuable time?
Pursue the dream first. Pursue it in every way possible. Throw yourself into it because
when you are at the ages of 18-22, that is when you have the passion and energy to
try things. And besides, nobody is expecting much from you anyway (other than
expecting you to go to college).
Later you can change your mind. You can always change your mind. But if you
consistently make it a habit to put dreams on hold, the only thing thats left is
nightmares.

You said dont go to college, may I know why? @CashN1n9

Ive written many articles and posts on this, and Ive had at least seven death threats
on this topic. Heres one of my posts http://bit.ly/fk9i2I. Heres one of the death threats
http://bit.ly/hat5yw.

But Ill try to summarize quickly:

A) Student loan debt is higher than ever. Tuitions have risen even higher than health
care costs since I went to college. So why isnt there a national discussion on this?
B)

Kids take the money and we all know what they do those four years. Dont deny it!

C) Theyve just spent 12 years behind a desk listening to boring teachers and taking
tests. Why dont you let them try one of these eight alternatives http://bit.ly/iewfpx.
D) Theres a big stat: kids with college degrees make more money. Unfortunately
anyone who took statistics 101 knows the flaw in this statistic. Can you explain?

Why do you often encourage people to drop out of school, when

you graduated from a good college with a respectable degree?
@oliverg12
Obviously this is a hostile question. Ive written many times about the value of college.
My assumption is that the real statement this person is making is: you dont want other
people to accrue the other benefits youve accrued. You want to keep people down.
So, several answers:
A)
I went to college so that gives me experience on what college is really about.
Would you rather have someone who didnt go to college tell kids not to go to college?
In which case, there are also many examples.
B)
College now is different than when I was a kid. The most important difference:
student loan debt is now so high that it exceeds credit card debt for the first time ever.
Inflation has gone up 3-fold in the past 40 years, healthcare costs have gone up 5-fold,
and tuitions for college have gone up 10-fold. How is this fair?
C)
People say, well, college students make more money than non-college students.
This statement suffers from selection bias. The type of people who went to college
twenty years ago certainly make more than the type of people who chose not to go to
college twenty year ago. Thats a completely different statement and more correct.

If you were to give one piece of advice to a high school freshman,

what would it be? @williamsjohn
Drop out.
High school is a jungle. Why do you think many high schools have metal detectors at
the front door. Places with good, healthy people dont have metal detectors at the front
door.
People get hit, they get bullied, they get spit on, they get laughed at. Or maybe this
was just me. I easily generalize so call me on it if Im wrong.
The other day I met a 25 year old on his third business. The other two were successful.
The third one just raised a million.
He dropped out of high school. He told me, one day I realized I knew how to learn
things. I could learn anything I wanted to. So what did I need school for?
You can say socializing with your peers. Is that really so great in high school? It
wasnt so great for me.
So my advice is: drop out, start businesses, spend time with your friends when they get
out of prison every day at 3 pm. And the rest of the time, learn what you want to do
and do what you want to do. You might never have that chance again so why waste
that in a prison?

If you had a very intelligent child entering college today, what

major and language skills would your recommend? @goldfo100
Heres the problem, in a nutshell, with entering college you are going to be with the
same people you spent the past 12 years with (demographically) and doing the same
thing (spending most of the day reading books that have nothing to do with anything,
and then fooling around with your friends without any supervision for the first time) and
doing it on your parents (or the banks) dime.
So if you are fortunate to have that dime, how about do something that would be much
more beneficial: dont go to college. Spend a year learning to paint, or taking singing
lessons, or learning yoga in India (getting in shape, meeting people from all over the

world, learning Eastern philosophy) or any of 100 other things that will actually better
your life, force you to meet new demographics, and do it for much cheaper than the
cost of college.
Then, after a year or two of that, why not go to college then if you still even want to?

How can education be improved? @StealthAviator

I assume he meant education for grades 1-12. I wrote about this recently in
Shakespeare is Awful, Jefferson was a Rapist, and PI is Useless http://bit.ly/oMh8Ry.
My basic assumption is that grades 1-12 are too standardized (higher test results for
many schools result in more state funding) and not individualized enough.
For instance, both of my kids love drawing Manga comics. But theres no way for them
to do this in school. And after school they are buried in homework and then tired. So
whatever skills they developed this summer when they were drawing a lot will start to
fade.
The other thing is: most things we learn in grades 1-12 we have to relearn anyway. Or
we forget. I asked one friend my age the other day, who discovered electricity? and
he answered instantly: Ben Franklin because that is what we were taught in grade
school. It happens to be the wrong answer. Anyone hear of William Gilbert in the
1600s?
So heres how I would reform it: since we know grades 1-12 is just glorified babysitting
so parents can work, why not hire a bunch of good moms (or dads) to watch over the
kids while they play outside, read books, draw, and do whatever they want. Keep them
out of harm, and guide them if they ask questions. Also let them play and learn on
computers if they want.
And thats it. Will save money, result in smarter kids, result in more active kids (less
obesity), and result in more kids finding their passions instead of being killed by
standardization.

PUBLIC SPEAKING
Im a groomsman in a large out of town wedding and was asked
to make a roast at the dinner. I hate public speaking. Whats your
best advice? @Trader220
I have never given a roast. But I have been asked twice to help someone else write
their and prepare for their roast, and it worked out well. I have four pieces of advice:
READ THE POST MENTIONED ABOVE: 11 Unusual Methods for Being a Public Speaker
http://bit.ly/jFlvrL).
WATCH 30 MINUTES OF STANDUP COMEDY ABOUT A HALF HOUR BEFORE THE
ROAST. I had to give a talk for Fidelity last week. The talk was about stocks. Did I
prepare by reading the Wall Street Journal? Of course not! I prepared by watching Ellen
Degeneres do standup and watching an episode of the Jon Stewart Show. They have
perfect timing. To even have 1/10 of that rub off on you will multiply your abilities by
ten.
TELL STORIES. Dont tell how you feel. Tell funny stories (but not inappropriate ones)
about the groom. Stories have a beginning, middle, and end, and some suspense to
them in the middle.
ITS GREAT THAT YOU ARE NERVOUS ABOUT IT. Dont be afraid to be afraid. Fear is
very natural in public speaking. Say to yourself, thank god Im afraid, else Id definitely
give a bad roast. Observe the fear. Say hello to it. Give it a chair so it can kick back
inside of you and relax. Dont try and run from it. Its a natural part of the process of
public speaking. When you acknowledge that, then you can get back to the business of
being funny for your roast.
BONUS ADVICE: Jeff Ross has written an excellent book about giving roasts. I
recommend it.

Im acing your writing tips (thx!), but could you give us some tips
on public speaking, presentations, etc.? @linoxgill
Ive given five talks in the past three weeks and I am now preparing to speak at my
own radio show. the topics are always changing so I have to do a lot of preparation. I
think four of the talks went well (people laughed at all the jokes) and one was a little
flat, but I was able to improve it for a later talk. Heres my post on 11 Unusual
Methods to be a Better Public Speaker http://bit.ly/jFlvrL.
Nobody believes me on this but the most unusual method is to slightly slur your
words.
Why does this work? It hypnotizes your body into thinking its drunk. Then your mind
has less inhibitions. You get less nervous what people think of you. You say whatever is
on your mind. And usually thats a lot better than saying only the subset of your mind
that you think is appropriate.

How to find humor or be funny when doing a presentation? @PriscillaPWood

The most important thing: be self-deprecating. I have one slide in a presentation, for
instance, where right before I turn to it I say, The last time I drove a car there was
unfortunately a photographer present And then I go this slide:
And then people laugh. Come up with a self-deprecating joke every other slide. Talk
about bad relationships. People relate to self-deprecation and bad relationships.
Why?
We live in a falsely perfect world. Everyone lies and says theyre perfect in some way or
other. I see this in the financial space or even the self-help space most of all. But
nobody is perfect. Everyone has problems. Everyone has low points. Everyone has
failed, has sacrificed, has cried, and has done stupid things. Do be open about yours
and people will relate and find it funny. And then love you for giving them permission to
fail also.

Ultimately your talk is not about your topic, but about making people feel better about
themselves and the world around them. Also, see 11 Unusual Methods to Be a Great
Presenter

HAPPINESS
What makes you genuinely happy? @Nisey7
I try to keep my expectations very low so just about anything will exceed my
expectations and make me happy. This can have a double-meaning, one negative and
one positive.
The negative is that I seek out shitty things and if they arent horrible then Im happy.
The positive is that I try not to constantly seek $100 million dollars, every deal, every
girl, and then (since I cant get all of the above) I will be happy.
In general, every day I try to reduce the things that Ive spent a lifetime striving for.
When these things hit zero, or as close to it as possible (Im always going to want a
roof over my head and a good woman next to me) I know I will be perpetually happy.

Are there important things in life that if you care less about
them you will be happier? If so, what are those things for you?
@jameskford
Of course! I outline this somewhat in my post Stop Listening http://bit.ly/sVdXKo. Try
this exercise: Imagine a point when you were a kid when you were happy. At that
point, what did you not care about?
A) I never cared about the news
B) Or the economy
C) Or gossip news
D) Very little about prime time TV (well, Fantasy Island on Saturday nights at 10pm
I would look forward to)
E) I never cared about Europe
F) I never cared about sports (unless I was gambling but then I stopped gambling)
G) I certainly never cared about stocks.
Well, one can say, now you have responsibilities. Do I? I do care about my kids. But I

still dont need to care about the economy or Europe for the reasons outlined in another
question.
I will never care about who is President. Not a single politician has ever made me
happier or sadder. So I dont care who is elected ever.
I dont care what people think of me. This sounds harsh. I do, in fact, want people to
like my writing. But, if someone is a jerk then I certainly dont care what they think of
me. And if someone is a good person and doesnt like me well, then, theres nothing I
can do about it. Good thing theres seven billion other people on the planet.
I try to never worry about going broke. When all you do is think of the ways you will go
broke, you will go broke. But what I do is I know that if I network as much as possible
and come up with good ideas for the people I network with and have the ability to
discern who is worthwhile working with and who is not then I know I can always come
back from zero. Ive done it three times! This is a function of staying healthy in every
way.

BEING HONEST
Has revealing so much in your blog and books affected you
negatively? - Oz W.-P.-McK. III @wrgly
Yes and no. Many people who used to speak to me, no longer speak to me. This
includes everyone from friends, to former colleagues, to relatives. Many people have
felt I have revealed too much.
In one or two cases, I had to change a story to be less revealing. Im ok harming
myself but never ok if I harm others in what I write.
But overall the blog has been a net positive. Ive met MANY new friends. Some people I
hope will remain lifelong friends. And I hope that continues. Being honest draws good
people to you. Pushes negative people away. I hope the readers of this feel the same
way I do.

How do you tell the truth w/o sounding like and a$$?
@socialhotchoco
In my post, Seven Things Happen to You When You Are Honest http://bit.ly/roqech I
advocate, obviously, honesty, but not radical honesty.
Radical honesty is when you have no filter between brain and mouth and is advocated
by many as the right way to live. For instance if you want to have sex with your wifes
best friend you just blurt that out to both of them. No good!
Most people dont know how to do what I call constructive honesty.
I always view honesty as Rule #2, rule #1 being dont hurt anyone. I try to make it a
discipline not to even have bad thoughts about someone (very hard for me! Particularly
at three in the morning or with random bank tellers.)
I definitely dont want to say something that will hurt someone.

Lets say a friend asks me to look at a blog post. I look at it and dont like it. I will take
the time to think about it and then say, do X, Y, and Z and this will be a good post.
Thats an honest answer, it helps them, and it helps their readers.
Lets say someone asks me about a business idea they have. If I dont like it I will say,
A lot of things have to happen to make that idea work. I think there;s a few ways you
can simplify it to make it easy to do and still valuable to you.
In other words: put effort into your honesty. Honest without effort is like shitting on the
floor in the middle of your house. Nobody will visit you after that, and before long, you
wont even like yourself.

What do you think of the phrase guilty pleasure and do you

have any? @JenShahade
Before I answer this let me share with you that Jen Shahade is one of my favorite chess
players. A former US Womens chess champion and author of two great books, Chess
Bitch and Play Like a Girl. Ive read both and benefited just as much from the second
as the first.
Now: Guilty Pleasures.
Everything has consequences, good and bad. Everything you do. You cant avoid it.
Keep that in mind with this answer.
Theres three types of guilty pleasures:
1)
Those that hurt others. For instance, cheating on a wife. The consequence is that
your pleasure is fleeting. Your sadness is painful (when you are back with your wife and
miss the other person), and the consquences could be awful (the pain you cause
everyone or even the pain caused by the withholding of love you are giving to your
guilty partner).
2) Those that hurt you. For instance, eating that huge chocolate cake at 4 in the
morning when nobody else is up. The pleasure is delightful. The consequence is when
the cake is gone, and when you go back to sleep and wake up later, feeling ill.
3)

Those that give you shame. For instance, a guilty pleasure for me is playing chess

online. It doesnt really hurt me. But I feel ashamed that Im not being more productive.
My goal is to eliminate #1 completely from my life. #2 mostly (but be aware of the
consequences) and with #3 its trickier. I want to turn guilty pleasures into real
pleasures.
Where does the shame come from? Some sense of I have to be perfect. Or I must
never procrastinate with games. Perfection only leads to shame because the only way
to be creative, to be fun, to be flexible in life, to roll with lifes punches is to be
imperfect.
My goal is imperfection. To thrive in it. To thrive in my guilty pleasures until they
transform me into a life of contentment.

How do I make my unknown website popular? @ThePorchHound

Its funny how honesty becomes a strong competitive advantage. Your entire
competition is dishonest. Im not saying they are lying. They are just slick, or are hiding
the truth in various ways. They might give 10 best ways to find success but dont talk
about all the times they failed.
In 1995 (I forget the exact site) there was a girl who was a narcoleptic. She slept 20
hours a day. But, she had a diary she kept online (what we would call a blog now). And
because she so honest and sincere about what she was going through, she had more
hits per day than People Magazines fledgling website.
Sincere voices always rise to the top. Honesty and bleeding are so easy for us to do and
yet NONE of our competitors do it. Be honest and you will rise to the top [See, 33
Unusual Ways to Be a Better Writer http://bit.ly/gDzHGb]
One great example is Google. Imagine being a consulting company but whenever a
client comes to you, you say no, you should go to my competitor over here.
Thats what Google does. If you type in cancer, Google itself has no content about
cancer but will point you to all of its website competitors that do have information that
can help you about cancer. Consequently, Google is the most popular website in the
world. Its the source. And his is why Yahoo websites are number two. Yahoo is also a
source. Become a Source. You do that through honesty, through fearless bleeding, so

people know that your site or business first is the truest spot for information that we all
need. [See, How Honesty can make You Rich http://bit.ly/oyhSm2]

Bluffing in business and love. Is it lying? Is it bad, ok, or a

necessary evil? @jhilderley
In life you have 7 billion competitors (the other humans who live here). How do you
separate yourself apart? Well, this is easy. 99.99% of them bluff/lie every day
Cultivate constructive honesty (as opposed to radical honesty).
Then you will stand out in any beauty contest with the other seven billion people. You
will rise up and shine versus your peers. You will rewards you couldnt expect.

GETTING THINGS DONE

How do you stop yourself from wasting time? It has become an
addiction which leads to frustration at the end of the day.
@jaideepkhare
Im the biggest time waster of all. I was having breakfast a few weeks ago with Naval
Ravikant, the founder of Angelist. He refers to the ritual of doing all the Internet checks
as the loop. The loop of checking Twitter, Facebook, emails, blogs, analytics, news,
etc.
After that breakfast I timed how long my particular loop took. I thought it would be
about three or four minutes. It was eighteen minutes. And that didnt count me
responding to anything. And I do that loop about ten times a day. Thats 180 minutes.
Three hours! Holy...!
So heres what Im doing. You cant stop cold turkey. That is like a complete alcoholic
stopping suddenly and at once. You wake up in the middle of the night with the shakes
right away, and if you dont end up in a hospital where they are pumping new blood
into you then you can die.
One minute a day Im taking out one of the things I do to waste time. Theres the loop,
theres playing extra games of chess online. Etc. One minute a day. By the end of the
year I should be down from about 250 minutes a day to about 20 minutes a day. That
will be good.
And my three year goal, as I mentioned in My Minimalism Manifesto
http://bit.ly/rMTIyn is to get down to 30 minutes of Internet time a day. Maybe I will
find other things to fill that time but I hope they are fun, productive things.
Thats it. One minute a day gets rid of. Dont kill yourself trying to do it all at once.
Youll get the shakes and die. Just one minute a day.

How do you organize an overwhelming amount of work? How do

you make sure you do what you have to do in a day/week?
@flabastida
Theres two answers. Just like theres two answers to the question: How can I have
more money?
Answer #1: You make more.
Answer #2: You spend less.
And its not one or the other. You have to do both.
A week has three characters in the story of your life: the events of the week, you,
and the energy you start the week with.
Like in any good story, the three characters have problems at the beginning of the
story, solve them throughout the story, and hopefully live happily ever after at the end.
So lets see how they can do it:
Character #1: The events of the week. You only have a finite amount of energy.
Nobody has infinite. Or wed be like god or superheroes or something. So assume you
have a finite amount of energy. And, to live a wholesome life you need to focus that
energy on several things: your family, your friends, the people who love you, your own
creative projects, staying healthy, and finally, the projects that advance your career.
You also need to find some silence in your life.
So pull out a waiters pad right now and make the list: what events over the next week
cover all of the above areas. You need to cover all of them. If anything is out of balance
(your work projects) then reduce it. Now.
Im not saying your work life isnt important. Youll actually have a more successful
work life if you reduce the number of work-related events you have to attend to over
the next week. Ill tell you my work schedule:
A) When I am in New York City I do no more than one meeting in the morning and
one meeting in the afternoon.
B)

When I write articles for others I try to do no more than one per week.

C) When I do a work-related favor (can you look at this company?) I do no more

than one per week
D) When I work on my blog I write every day but I post no more than 4-5 times per
week.
This is the right balance for me that leaves me time to have silence for myself, spend
time with Claudia, spend time with my kids.
What if you have a corporate job? Same thing: Try to do no more than one meeting in
the afternoon and one in the morning. Try to spend some time working on your
projects. Spend some time networking and/or helping other people with their projects,
and make sure you have time for silence.
Character #2: YOU. You need to find time for yourself or youll never recharge. Too
many people have said to me, I need to just finish building this business and then I
can get back in shape. SORRY. That doesnt work. You might die before you finish
building that business. Its important to consistently do some variation of the Daily
Practice I recommend either in this post or in my latest book. I say this not because Im
tryng to push you into anything but because I know it worked for me andsince I started
recommending it a year ago, Ive seen it work for many others.
Heres how it goes, within 1 month you start to have ideas flowing (almost how you
would be if all you ate were eggs, fruits, and vegetables flowing!). Within 3 months
you are an idea machine with double the energy. Within six months your life is
completely different.
Character #3: Your energy. All I can say is: every six months my life is completely
different. And with double the energy. Go for it.

How do you make more hours in the day? @MrJNowlin

Gandhi has a great quote on this. Someone said that with all of his responsibilities he
probably should be not be meditating for a whole hour every day. He replied, I guess I
need to meditate for two hours per day.
Time management is a myth. You have the time. You dont even really need to manage

it that much. For instance, going through the Internet loop: email, Facebook, Twitter,
news, etc. For most people that takes 15-20 minutes and they do it up to 10 times a
day. Do it twice a day.
But if thats hard we must take more extreme measures: No TV, no alcohol, no dinners
outside the house (ideally, no dinner past 7 pm or even earlier) and wake up an hour
earlier.
And, if you can, no meetings. And if you have a meeting, make it a walking meeting.
Walk around the block for your meeting. So you get exercise also and the meeting goes
faster. Or dont allow any chairs in the meeting room. I can guarantee the meeting will
only be five minutes then.
And dont waste time making excuses about this. Or complaining to me about it. Im
pretty busy also. So I dont watch TV, I dont waste time at dinners outside the house, I
wake up an hour earlier, I try (please god give me the strength) not to do the internet
loop too many times during the day. I dont take on meetings (or, rarely I pack all
my meetings into one day a week and then go from meeting to meeting).
So Ive saved time.
Now, my big challenge what to do with that extra time? So I write a lot. And help
businesses Im involved with. But I want to take even that down a notch. Spend more
time with people I love. Spend more time exercising and reading. I hope.

You seem to be a man of lists. Do you have a daily to do check list

that you cross things off or is it a more organic process?
@iChmpneGrl
Yes! Heres part of my list.
A)

I sleep 8-9 hours.

B) I read books by writers with strong voices so I hope some of that voice rubs off on
me when I begin writing.
C)

By 6 am Im writing (Im on my third cup of coffee by then).

D) Around 9 am I start thinking of ideas for making money, writing ideas, book ideas,
distribution ideas, helping others ideas, networking ideas.
E) Then the day begins. I try to respond to as many people who have written me as
possible if I dont have meetings in the way.
F) Sometime in afternoon I try to write 1000 words on a novel. If I can do that 2/3
of days then Ill have the equivalent of four novels done within a year. So well see if I
can stick to this!
G)

Asleep by 7-8 pm.

I avoid anything thats a time waster: too much social media, I dont read news. No pop
culture. No Angry birds or other games. No emails with people who hate me or who I
dont like. No prime time TV. No more than two meals a day. No junk food. No
gossiping. All of the above taken together saves me about three hours compared with
how I used to live my life.

SOCIAL AND GENERAL MEDIA

Twitter or Facebook? - jennablan
Both. With Twitter I can keep my finger on the worlds pulse. With Facebook I can keep
my finger on my friends pulses. Hopefully every day both are alive and healthy.
And with only one of the above companies, it would be hard to track both pulses, both
of which are very important to me

Does Twitter make us worse writers or better writers overall? Do

you think <140 characters is about right or would you prefer
more? @JenShahade
I like Twitter because theres a time limit just as much as a word limit. The time limit
forces people to ask you or interact with you in a way that takes no time at all to read
and understand and no time at all to respond.
We can then take the time to expand on the answers. So I think Twitter is a wealth of
non-stop short ideas and we can pick and choose which ideas become bigger, become
the ones that consumer our minds with more words than are probably necessary.
My answer at the time was slightly different but I stand by this also because Twitter is a
place where many friendships develop over 140 words:
140 words is a great way to begin a conversation. More than 140 words (via email, say)
is a great way to continue a conversation, and face-to-face is a great way to end a
conversation, and perhaps begin a real friendship.

I just started a Linkedin ad campaign to jump start my network in

a new city, any other good ideas? @bgin2end
Im not sure a Linkedin campaign works at all to jumpstart a network. I think a little
more elbow grease is needed.
The best thing to do, everyday is to list 10 people you would like to network with. Come
up with 10 ideas for them and send to them for free and say, can I buy you a coffee?
This:
A)
B)
C)

Shows people you are thinking about their concerns perhaps more than their own
That interaction with you can make them money
Can get them a free coffee

I think roughly one out of ten will answer depending on who they are and the quality of
the ideas. I think it will also grab you a higher caliber of network than a generic ad
campaign will (not saying that bgin2ends campaign is generic since I havent seen it
but I think most campaigns are generic in order to hit a wide audience). You can call
this personalized networking in that its like personalized medicine. Medicine that
works based on a persons unique DNA.

You dont read newspapers so how do you keep up with the

news? @socialhotchoco
Three answers:
A)
Who cares about the news? Name one thing in the news today that will make me
any happier. Most of the media lies to me to make me panic more. I dont want to panic
more. So I wont read the news.
B)

When I go on TV I might read a few research reports to get up to speed.

C)
Or, I might not. The news never actually changes: Europe, Kim Kardashian,
economy worries, everyones angry, everyones depressed, election blah blah blah. The
news is the same every single day. I know how to respond to the news whether I read
it or not. Id rather read a funny book than read the news. That will make me happier
during those twenty minutes. In fact, the best way I prepare for a TV appearance is by
watching YouTube clips of Ellen Degeneres doing standup.

Try it, today: instead of reading the news (even the gossip news), read a non-fiction
book where you can learn something, or read a funny book where you can laugh at
something, or call your kids, or do something where you can actually add to the value
of your life instead of decrease from it. Try that every day now for a week.
See the difference?

Some people sleep walk. Others sleep eat or talk in their sleep. I
apparently sleep news. @jaltucher would be disappointed.
@iamtiffani
By the way, this wasnt a question. She just happened to tweet this while I was doing
the Twitter Q&A.
Heres my worst habit when Im trying to sleep eight hours.
I wake up to go to the bathroom at 2 in the morning. This, in itself, is annoying. Im
dead tired. Im in the middle of a dream, and suddenly in the dream I have to go to the
bathroom. But everywhere I go, theres someone already there. So I have to run
around in my dream to find another bathroom. It never ends until I finally wake up at 2
am and go to the bathroom.
Im so tired, I think to myself: well, at least Ill fall back to sleep right away. Im too
tired.
But then I get back in my bed. I have my iPad, my laptop, my phone, and maybe even
some headphones within three feet of me.
I figure, Im so tired, I might as well check whats going on for a few seconds. Its too
tempting.
iPad On: Email, Twitter, Twitter mentions, blog, blog stats, Facebook, S&P futures,
Amazon book rank. And god forbid, The News.
And now Im up. Why did that one person write that one email? Or, why is the world so
screwed up? Or do I need to delete that negative comment right now?
Claudia is sound asleep next to me. Doesnt she even care whats going on in the world

at 2 in the morning.Now 3 in the morning? Doesnt she want to know what my book
fell in Amazon ranking? Or that I got an email about that deal I was working on? Has
she given up so easily that her eyes are just closed and shes off in her own dreams,
flying across her own astral landscapes while I lie here awake, sick, puking in my brain
with every pixel in the darkness laughing at me?
Maybe Ill read a book for fifteen minutes. That will make me sleep. Im up anway.
Maybe I can even get work done. So then I read until 4am. Ive been up two hours.
Normally I wouldve woken up between 4 and 5 so now I fall back to sleep and I dont
wake up until 7 am and Im totally exhausted now.
This is bad.
So I replied to @iamtiffani. Screen diet. No screen between 6:30 pm and 8 am.
We never had screens before and we lived. Why do we need to see the screen between
those hours now? Well sleep better. Make love better. Eat better. Be less stressed. Less
anxious. Less needy (I wont need to check my number of Twitter followers for an
entire 13.5 hours a day.)
But its hard. For people with screen addictions (me), its very hard. So do this. Try it for
five days. Starting today. Just do it. No screen between 6:30 pm and 8 am. Thats too
hard? Poor baby! Ok, try this: between 7:30 pm and 7 am.
Please, I beg you. Because Im selfish. Because I know the world will be a better place
if we all just try this screen diet.
Lets Occupy Sleep and become in the top 1% of people who live well-rested, less
stressful lives. Then we will inherit the Earth.

Why do you always advise to ignore the media, yet regularly

contribute to hype and fear monger publications? @robtoole
Every day the headlines get worse and worse and then, when the worst doesnt
happen, the media forgets to apologize. Whatever happened to the radiation that was
supposed to wash up on the shores of San Francisco from Japan? Everyone got sick
taking iodine pills. No radiation. No apology.

And now Greece. What is it with Greece. Since 40BC Greece has never been a selfsufficient country. They were also dependent on funds from others (last: we funded
them to keep the Soviets out of the Mediterranean). They never ever had money. Why
they were put in the Euro union is beyond me.
And now the media wants us to worry about them even though their effect on our
economy is less than 1/10 of 1%. It might even be more like 1/1000 of 1%.
So why do I go on? To try to do my little to set the record straight although it probably
accomplishes nothing. I think people at home are so used to hearing doom and gloom
all the time Im hoping that a little bit of optimism will be good for them before we all
talk ourselves into a Depression (little d or big D).

Whats the best (most responsible/useful) way to keep up-to-date

on whats going on in the world? @ryan_a_lane
Do the opposite of what everyone else does: read nothing. Why do I need to keep
updated?
I once gave a talk at a major newspaper. Afterwards several of the reporters came up
to me and said, that was totally different than how we analyze the news. We usually
have no idea what to say. Like if the market goes down we say, market down due to oil
fears . This was in 2004 that I gave this talk. Its gotten a lot worse since then. Now
the media tries to find the most crazy thing we can be afraid of and they put that on
the cover.
And theres no news source thats different. So today, rather than reading any news at
all I finished off a book of short stories I was reading (Knockemstiff) and started
reading Stephen Levys new book In the Plex. Ive been reading Levy since his book
Hackers. I also read some poetry by Charles Bukowski. Then I started my day.
Reading any information source for up to date news will only make one stressed,
confused, uninformed, and generally in a bad mood. So why bother?

HEALTH
How much of being healthy has to do with being independently
wealthy enough to not sweat the small shit? @Andrew_Ferri
A lot and a little. Having money definitely solves your money problems. Which means
you dont have to worry about paying the rent. You dont have to worry about going
broke. You dont have to work a back breaking or mind breaking job from nine to five.
You dont have to be scared.
I really hate being scared. I know it affects my health in every way. So it makes a lot
harder for me to live to my potential. No matter what, can you check these four boxes
every day?
PHYSICAL do a little something that improves your health physically, no matter what
your personal financial condition is? When I was in India doing yoga a year ago, the
main teacher, Sharath Jois, said: rich? Do your practice. Poor? Do your practice.
Problems with your girlfriend? Do your practice. All will come.
EMOTIONAL what can you do today that will improve your life just slightly on an
emotional level? Can you be kind to your fiance? Can you spend time with a friend?
Can you NOT respond to someone who provokes you?
When Atisa, a Bengala meditation master from 1000 AD, brought the 57 lojong slogans
to Tibet to transmit Buddhism to the Tibetans he was very nervous they would fall on
deaf ears. How come? He had heard the Tibetans were very peaceful and had no
worries. And if they had no worries, they would have no challenges to work through in
order to become better people.
Well, it turns out he was wrong and Tibetans, like everyone, have much to work
through, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, etc.

MENTAL can you and do you still come up with ideas every day?

SPIRITUAL can you and do you still think of the people you are grateful for each day?
Can you pray for two minutes a day or sit and try to think of nothing.
You can do these four things each day, with or without money. To mis-quote Sharath:
do your Daily Practice http://bit.ly/fuiRS9 and all things will come.

Do you get a flu shot every year? @RichP

I havent had the flu ever since I stopped drinking alcohol

After I fix myself, how do I find others who are also fixed?
@kjepeneter
The question is really asking: Im healthy now I want to meet other people who are
healthy. Healthy not just physically but emotionally and in other ways.
The answer is that you dont have to worry: when you are the beacon of light in the
gray storm, the other boats that have survived will naturally come to you. This is a law
of the universe. Like attracts like is a clich because it works.
I have met better friends through this blog than just about through any other means
in my life. For me, I wasnt ready to meet good friends until recently. Now I am. And
when you are ready, things happen.
What about a girlfriend, does it hold for that also?
Yes it does. The way I was able to meet the love of my life http://bit.ly/mDC2uD was
when I made a conscious decision to be emotionally healthy: not get obsessed over
anyone, not try too quickly for sex, not drink alcohol, but find someone who I really
liked/loved and thought would be a good partner for the rest of my life. Someone who I
could not only kiss but eventually die with.
More seaweed crackers now. Im obsessed with these things. I can even hear Claudia
doing yoga upstairs. But I dont think seaweed is heavy enough for disqualifying me
from doing yoga. Ill catch up to her later.

COMING UP WITH IDEAS

Whats your technique for coming up with ideas? @JonasNielsen
Lets say you are an excellent archer. You hit the bulls eye every time. But then you
stop for five years. You pick up a bow and arrow. Chances are you wont hit the bullseye. Your muscles have atrophied. Your skills have gotten weaker.
Its the same thing with the idea muscle. Most people have let their idea muscle
atrophy. The key is to start aiming for the target again, whether you miss or hit. But
get up early and set up the target and start shooting arrows every day.
Write down ideas every single day. Bad ideas and good ideas. Dont judge them at first.
Just brainstorm, even if its a shitstorm.
Heres my post on nine ways to become more creative http://bit.ly/nOPi16. This will
help in the long-term with idea generation.
I can guarantee this. Idea generation every day, combined with other aspects of the
Daily Practice which I talk about it my last book http://amzn.to/ppDrlh, I Was Blind But
Now I See, will change your life completely within six months.

BUSINESS IDEAS
In a business, is an idea the most valuable part of the creation?
@greenjobseeker
No!
Ill give you an example: In 2006 I had an offer from a bank to buy the fund of hedge
funds I was managing. The offer was a good offer except they wanted me to sign a
six year employment agreement. And if I quit at any point Id have to give all the
money back. Even my lawyer said, I thought slavery was outlawed. So I couldnt
take the deal.
So I outlined ten ideas I thought could be good businesses. Nine of those ideas were
bad ideas. Anybody can outline ten business ideas. Anybody can outline nine bad ones.
Then I spec-ed out each business, I put the specs on elance.com, I took in over 100
possible bids from developers who wanted to create the businesses, and then I hired
one for each idea, including for Stockpickr.com, which worked out well for me.
So the ideas were bullshit. You need to always practice the idea muscle else you wont
have any good ideas. But the actual important step was the next step: the spec-ing out
of each site, using elance.com to hire a developer, paying the developer to get started,
and then starting.
The idea held the ladder. But I had to climb the ladder to change the lightbulb.
Climbing the ladder, despite my fear of heights, was the most important part.

If you have an idea that the market isnt ready for, do you sit on it
or build it out anyway? @chrislopez
I had ten ideas and nine were bad. Maybe the market wasnt ready for them. Who
knows? Id be broke now if I had tried to really pursue them instead of quickly cutting
my losses.

Since 1990 people have been building apps for wireless devices. I would say the market
only started getting ready for those apps in 2010. (I know this, having started a
wireless business that the market was not ready for back in 2000).
So, ideas are a dime a dozen. If you have an idea that the market is not ready for,
come up with a new idea.

BUSINESS AND
ENTREPRENEURSHIP,
Is it possible to start a business in this worldwide depression?
Groupon started in November 2008! Dont let media fear stop you! Many people were
critical of this answer. How come? Because of all the media hype pulling Groupons
numbers apart and saying this is a horrible business.
FACT: Groupon is the fastest growing revenues business in history. They started less
than three years ago and have 1.5 billion in revenues this year. The founders have
already cashed out probably close to a billion dollars.
Someone said, But they dont make money.
Excuse me, isnt it enough in less than three years to be pulling down $1.5 billion in
revenues? Most companies dont get to, or dont even want to, be profitable until
theyve been in business 5-10 years. They have to grow first. Amazon took a decade
and now they are spewing profits right in our faces and they will continue to do so
forever.
November, 2008 was a scary month:
A)
B)
C)
D)

The financial system was collapsing

Unemployment hadnt yet skyrocketed but was about to
I was lying on the floor of countless hotel rooms crying about my lack of luck
Company after company was going out of business

Did that stop the Groupon guys? Should it stop you, just because they arent yet
profitable? And, by the way, I can find countless examples of companies started in the
Great Depression that became amazingly profitable. But lets leave it at this: dont let
the news stop you from beginning your path to World Domination.

How do you start a business when you have no money? how do

you minimize risk of losing everything @lakergod
In 1994 I had no money and I started working at HBO. When I say I had no money, I
had $0. As Ive written before I lived in a one room apartment with a guy, Elias
Zamora, who made his living gambling chess in Washington Square Park. I slept on the
futon, he slept on the couch. I had a garbage bag next to the futon that had all my
clothes including a suit Id pull out each morning to get to work at HBO.
When you work at a big corporate giant you see everything they are doing wrong, all
the holes that are missing. You start to think: they dont have X. They dont have Y. If
they only had Z then their business would be better. Every day you can come up with
10 things they dont have that would make their business better.
You can build those ten things.
And guess what: you have a ready customer: the company you work for. Or, if not
them, then their direct competitors.
That is, at a high level, how I started my first business. I still had a full time salary. But
I started making things for them and for other companies that I sold in a freelance
capacity. Until it was too big and I was too busy and I was making too much money so
I had to quit.
And quitting even then is still a leap of faith that requires courage. But staying at a
company for 15 years until you are inbred requires a sad sort of courage as well.
Every day take a little jump. Jump over a puddle. Jump over an alligator crossing the
street. Jump over your own fears. Eventually youll land in the pleasure dome and
hopefully you get to stay there.
To summarize: find a customer that will pay you. That minimizes your risk.

Who is the biggest cheat on Wall Street? @Affinityps

You are. Why does the average retail investor do 25 months of redemption from
domestic equities? And then why do they buy every other product Wall Street peddles

them.
I was once pitching an ETF. Heres the ETF: wed buy 100 stocks owned by super
investors: Warren Buffett, Carl Icahn, etc. It would be The Superinvestor ETF. What a
load of bullshit. Many years these investors are 30 or 40% behind the market. They are
already rich. They can care less about you or me. [YOU LOST ME HERE I DO NOT
UNDERSTAND WHAT THIS IS OR MEANS WHAT IS THE ETF? ETC, COULD YOU PLEASE
CLA-RI-FY] HEE HEE
But the guys I was pitching to said, Yes! This is brilliant. Lets do it. They wanted to
put up the first $100 million for it but I didnt do it. Nobody needs yet another schlocky
wall street product to peddle to grandma and grandpa who worked hard for the little
packets of pennies hidden in the mattress.
So who is the biggest cheat? Really the middleman. Everything he says, everything he
sells, every number he shows you to show how great his product is, is a lie. Stay away.

Off the top of your head, what would you consider the best 3
entrepreneur books? @codymort
There are several questions here. What is an entrepreneur? What makes a good book
about entrepreneurs? And what are the best books Ihave read.
An entrepreneur is not a businessman. Hes not a billionaire. Hes not necessarily a
leader. Im going to change the definition a little bit.
The universe is going in a certain direction. Atoms are in motion; quantum particles are
on their endless journey. An entrepreneur is like a god that puts his hand into the
universal soup and changes the direction of things so that the resulting worldscape that
is created is now different.
An entrepreneur can be a businessman, an artist, an employee, a creator, a mystic.
His mind is pulsating on a different rhythm than everyone else. He is either born this
way, or learns it by seeing it in his colleagues, or gets it by clearly seeing the holes and
gaps around him that can be filled when everyone else is somehow missing them.
His mind knows how to solve problems when the universe doesnt go the way he has
planned. His emotions are free from conflict and from the daggers constantly being

thrown at him by the people who are jealous or refuse to believe his new ideas. He is
physically fit. He knows how to surrender when defeated and move onto the next event
because he had confidence that in the long run things work out for the independent
thinkers and souls of the world.
What are the best books for entrepreneurs?
THE RATIONAL OPTIMIST, by Matt Ridley. This one book alone shows how we live in a
world where not only humans mate and evolve but ideas mate and evolve even faster.
Understanding this one idea and seeing it in action through Ridleys examples will
inspire you to dip into that evolutionary pool and inspire yourself.
WALLACE WATTLES: THE SCIENCE OF GETTING RICH. Forget Napoleon Hill. Forget the
power of positive thinking. Forget the Law of Attraction or The Secret. The source of
all of these books is a book written in 1900 by a relatively unknown, Wattles.
I WAS BLIND BUT NOW I SEE, my book, http://amzn.to/ppDrlh. The purpose of my
book is threefold:
1.How society, commercialism, corporate America, and government, are constantly
hypnotizing the everyday person to conform to a definition of Happiness and Success
that is far removed from reality.
2.-

How to recognize and reverse that hypnotism.

3.How to start from the core within and get back physical, emotional, mental, and
spiritual health so that you can go on to be the creator, inventor, innovator, artist,
entrepreneur you were meant to be.

Should one build a prototype or get a venture capitalist first?

@wkarmistead
Absolutely yes, build a prototype first. Go to elance.com or scriptlance.com, put a basic
spec of your project up on the site (dont worry about anyone stealing the idea). You
will have a reverse auction to see what programmers will do to your project. Pick a

programmer (cheap, but look at their recommendations and call references), and build
the project for $2-4k (assuming a minimal feature set is cheap enough). Why do this
instead of going to a VC first?
A)

Once you have a site up your value is higher.

B)
You will learn extremely valuable things in the process of building your site: you
will come up with new ideas, learn what obstacles and competition might exist, etc
C)
You might have a chance to get a paying customer, or users. This also values
your company higher.
D)
You might realize it was a bad idea. Easier to move onto the next idea if it were
your own money.
E)
Why waste time pitching your invisible project when you can use that time to do
valuable thinking and building.
F)

You might never need VC money.

How can I start a business and sell it within two years while
making lots of cash? @jeredbare
I can just say what the easiest method that I used was. I had zero business experience.
But I started a service business (making websites for others) and I didnt leave my job
until I had several clients (HBO, most notably), and then you build it until you sell it.
Then repeat the process.
If I were going to do things a little differently Id change two things:
A)
I would start off as service but then productize the service. For instance, in my
first successful business I wouldve changed the service to a product that made and
built websites. Product businesses sell for higher value. I had written all the software
that we used again and again to make the backbone of websites but I didnt realize that
the smart thing was to productize it.
B)
Most important: I wouldve just kept the cash instead of trying to reinvest it in
stocks to make more. My biggest regret is making that money and then losing it all that

first time and then having to start from scratch again and again.

Is being an tech entrepreneur in the midwest impossible? Do I

have to move to the coast? @kernicus
I gave a talk last year at a venture capital conference in Des Moines, Iowa sponsored
by John Pappajohn, an 83 years young entrepreneur himself who I write about here
in a post written on my birthday last year (theres a specific reason I wrote it that day)
http://bit.ly/fsqzE2.
The room was filled with potential entrepreneurs, each with amazing ideas for tech,
energy, marketing, and other sectors.
I absolutely think being on the coasts is the worst way right now to be an entrepreneur.
Theres a million little startups begging for money from VCs and angels. The problem is
theres also a billion little parties, meetups, tech meet-ups, etc. where everyone parties,
listens to boring talks, etc. All of this is a distraction.
The Midwest is as cheap as the coasts. Heres what you do:
A)
B)
C)
D)

Stay in the Midwest so you can live as cheaply as possible

Build your product or service
Get a customer or traction. Begin to learn what can go wrong in your business.
Get revenues

Then decide if you need the coasts or not. Chances are you dont.

Im a new business owner and we are off to a great start. What is

the biggest mistake a new business makes after initial success
when looking to expand? @ajwahls
DONT MOVE. Wait until you are so packed you cant fit another single computer and
desk in there. Moving spends money, distracts you from your business, and gives you a

false feeling of success. Dont move until you are forced.

DONT HIRE PEOPLE. You dont need an org chart until everyone at the business is
working 10 hours a day and working on weekends. Then hire one person. Then repeat.
Try to hire people smarter than you. Else, the culture of your business will start to slip.

I feel an overwhelming urge to start a business. I work as a

manager at a gym. I respect the owner a lot and he dangles the
idea of me owning part of his next gym. Should I view my boss as
someone who I can talk to about my desire to be an
entrepreneur? @adampimentel
When I first started my first business I always kept my stable salary from my corporate
job going until I had the money, clients, and salary to make the leap.
You want to make a leap. But a leap of faith is too much to ask.
So your instinct seems correct: to hold onto a job you love and are learning from.
Whether or not you ask your advice for advice (he won't give you money) is not
necessary - he wants to teach you and you want to learn so you will.
On the money side: he will be overbearing as a partner (no judgement against him thats how people are). So you want to go it your own way or with family or good
friends.
I would start thinking in two ways:
Are there any local gyms for sale? You can borrow, beg, plead, and negotiate to pay for
it. There are businessbroker listing sites to see gyms that are for sale.
I'd outline how much it costs to start from scratch a gym: there's renting the space,
leasing the equipment (don't buy), insurance, and getting trainers to get clients in
there.
Then I'd start brainstorming on how to make your gym special. What does it? Maybe

you have post-workout massage in the back so the muscles that are worked on get
properly stretched out afterwards (i'm making that up - i have no idea about what
happens to muscles). Maybe you sell protein powders and you set up "Super Gyms" for
people who really want to go for it.
You have the desire. That's great. I had the desire for about 2 years before I was able
to make the full plunge although I was making double income for awhile (stable and
unstable/startup incomes) before I made the leap. I was very cautious.
So:
A) Keep the desire
B) Learn everything you can
C) Come up with 10 ideas a day on your business, starting tomorrow
D) Be as cautious as possible
E) Plan the leap, but don't rely on faith. Plan EVERYTHING
F) No partners that you'll hate later. My first partner was my sister. It was a very
successful business. but we don't speak. That's what happens.

Quitting my enterprise consulting job after 7 years & starting my

own company (technology services based). Any advice?
@RobbieAb
Three things.
#1 Pat yourself on the back for quitting your job. Quitting is not for everyone. But when
you do it, and you do it for the right reasons, it can lead to an enormous feeling of
freedom. Heres 10 Reasons You Should Quit Your Job http://bit.ly/ipsmoi.
#2: Now is the beginning of the rest of your life. I used to write for AOLs DailyFinance
site. When all of the great employees of that site got laid off I felt really bad for them
and wanted to help. I wrote this post, which is good on any occasion where yesterday
was the last day of your job: 10 Things to Do if You Were Fired Yesterday
http://bit.ly/i20SBh.
#3: Since you are going off to start your own consulting business I also recommend:
The Easiest Way to Succeed as an Entrepreneur http://bit.ly/fTiZL5.

Build startup on the side slowly, or quit day job get funding and
move faster? @MrJNowlin
Do not leave the day job. By the time I left my day job I was totally able to duplicate
my income with my startup. I did not suffer one decrease. I had about 10 clients,
including my day job, and I was able to juggle the startup with the day job by giving up
on social life. I hired all my friends at either my day job or my startup.
From beginning of the startup until the time I left my job was about 1.5 years. Give it
time. I feel like the world is in a startup frenzy right now. Relax. Corporate America as
has been traditionally is now officially dead. Theres no safety there. Theres only
hustling now. Always have ideas and youll eventually be able to leave the day job.

What are your thoughts on employee recognition (entrepreneurial

or not) for a company of ~190 employees? Gift cards, recognition
in a newsletter, a lunch for over-achieving employees?
@andrealynn
If you have a program of sales incentives already in place ($100,000 in a month gets a
trip to Caribbean, etc) then that's fine. Else, I would not do something like that after
the fact because some people might feel bad.
Instead, you want the employees (and really all of the employees) to always feel like
there are opportunities to advance in your organization (as opposed to prizes).
Advancement means (depending on how you execute on this) more learning, more
money, more opportunities for wealth in the future.
I would sit down with the best employees and ask them specifically what they see their
future as. Maybe they eventually want to be entrepreneurs and go out on their own
(and that's fine also!), maybe they want a new title, maybe they want to go with you

on biz dev meetings (as long as it doesn't effect their sales meetings), maybe they want
a day off to do charity.
But if they know that you personally care about their personal advancement then they
will make you the most money and continue to kill for you. I would also ask them if
they know anyone like them that you can hire (and then you get rid of the
underperformers). This might also make the best employees feel more like managers.
Another possibility is stock options for the best of them. This can be done by putting
together a stock option program for everyone but that they earn into it based on past
and future sales. (i.e. don't give out all the options at once).

Who will be the next Steve Jobs? @bgin2end

Probably the article Ive gotten the most negative criticism on is 10 Unusual Things
About Steve Jobs http://bit.ly/gUJgcH. When it was on the front page of the
Huffington Post all of the kind commenters there were convinced I was a blind idiot and
a horrible writer. How could I admire a man as terrible as Steve Jobs? they wondered.
Every day we artists use the tools that flew out of his head onto the planet. Every day
our kids watch the shows his persistence in Pixar allowed creators to develop. Every
day students use the computers he conceived of starting in 1977. But now hes dead. Is
there another one?
Of course there is. There are many. Google, for instance, right now is wiring up Kansas
City, Missourri to have 2 GB / sec super-wifi. That means you can download an entire
movie in 2 seconds. Or the last season of Glee (every show) in about 20 seconds. Larry
Page and Sergey Brin have a thirty year vision of what the world will look like: there will
be Internet everywhere and blindingly fast, there will be cars driving without drivers, all
information will be catalogued and at our fingertips or already in our brains.
Mark Zuckerberg will catalog all of our social interactions, making it easier to effortlessly
stay in close contact with our friends no matter how apart in space and time. Every day
there are more Steve Jobs being created, growing up, innovating. He created the mold
but the mold is being filled over and over again. [See, "Why are Larry Page and I so
Different?" http://bit.ly/fO3EU5]

WEALTH
Whats more sane, an abundance or a scarcity mentality? I give
money away because I think therell be more- but Im not rich.
Am I crazy? @lindsaycampbell
You are the opposite of insane.
After going broke and making it back several times I feel scarred. I have a scarcity
complex. It doesnt matter how much money I have, I always feel like Im broke. I feel
like I have to hoard. I feel like the money can go away in a second through either
mistakes of my own, mistakes of the universe, or some magical force stealing from me.
But for me to take money, I have to take careful planned risks. I have to overcome my
scarcity complex every day and realize that I deserve money. I work hard, I plan for my
risks, I try to check every box, I have to trick myself into not thinking the money is
automatically gone, that its being put to work in engines that will generate more
money for me.
A rule of the universe that Ive written about is: Give and You Will Receive
http://bit.ly/fi1mHC. Every day try to think of all the ways you can give.
Having an abundance mentality, combined with a healthy risk aversion, is the best way
to ultimately receive.

INVESTING
Where does one begin is he/she wants to start investing?
@Nisey7
First off, day trading is dead. You can read my 8 reasons not to daytrade
http://bit.ly/h028VG or my 10 Reasons Not to Own Stocks http://bit.ly/kZz4rA.
That said, I do not think investing is dead.
Read The Essays of Warren Buffett by Lawrence Cunningham to see what the master
has said over the past 50 years. Note, Im not even pushing my own book, Trade Like
Warren Buffett http://amzn.to/yGff5O. Cunninghams book, compiled from Buffetts
letters to investors, is better.
Second, read The Rational Optimist by Matt Ridley. Ridley is one of the smartest men
alive right now. His book will teach you how to question the assumptions constantly
posed and feared by the media and used to scare you. He goes over everything from
peak oil, to overpopulation, to wars and violence, and analyzes all the statistics. Why is
this useful? How will this help you pick stocks?
Its because picking stocks is not the hard part in investing. Warren Buffett says it
succinctly, if you have good reason to believe a company will still be here 20 years
from now, it will probably be a good investment. We know Apple will still be here, for
instance, so thats a good stock to pick.
The problem is: what do you do the next time theres a 2008 (or even a summer 2011)
and all stocks crash. You have to be able to really analyze and say is the world ending
or is this just a blip.
Look at this chart here of the Dow for instance. Can you see where the crash of 1987
occurred? Its barely noticeable. And in your consciousness even it has to be barely
noticeable. Thats the hard part in investing. The rational optimist plus being healthy
and secure in other parts of your life, will help you become a better investor.
The times when I lost the most money investing was not because I was picking bad

stocks. Most of the stocks eventually hit new highs long after I sold them. It was
because I was either unhappy with my work life or marriage or family or whatever. And
so not thinking straight caused me to not invest straight. Thats the key to successful
investing.

In Margin Call theres a quote: There are 3 ways to make a

living: be first, be smarter, or cheat. What do you think?
@Candriawan
None of those are the answer. There were many search engines before Google, for
instance and many social networks before Facebook. So they were first but didnt make
a living. They all failed. And being smarter doesnt always work either. Microsoft
products were never considered best (Steve Jobs gave some funny quotes to Walter
Isaacson about this) but they won.
And cheating might work, but also might make you end up worse than you ever were.
So all of the methods above could work but they also might fail horribly.
The absolute best, surefire way to make a good living is to help someone else make a
good living. If your business or service helps others make money, particularly if your
method is scalable, then the amount of money you can make is incalculable.
For instance, when I really needed to make some money, I advised someone on how
they can sell their business. They made $41.5 million dollars. I can guarantee you I
made good money when that happened. I was spending a lot of time, for free, before
that happened. But once he made money, I made money.

Is being risk adverse a pathological character flaw? @noahlz

The total opposite! Lets say you hire someone who loves every kind of risk. He smokes
crack and screws hookers on the weekends. He power skis on his days off. He gambles
all his money in Las Vegas on his vacations.
How long will this employee last? How long will he even be alive? Not very long.
Ive been involved in startups for the past 17 years or so. The best startups had every
risk planned and accounted for before the business even started. The best
entrepreneurs avoid risk, are scared of it, plan for it. Nobody wants risks. They want

easy money. The way to get easy money is to have the most noble character trait of
all: being risk averse.
Its more risky to stay at the standard corporate job, living out your life afraid of your
boss, your mortgage, the economy, stocks, your 401k, and all the other things you are
scared of. I hate being scared.

VC companies say ideas worth nothing, execution is worth

everything, do you agree with that? @kortessIgor
Im going to break it into two parts: Whats good for you and whats good for VCs. Both
are important.
Whats good for you is to get the idea muscle flowing. Everyone says ideas are a dime
a dozen. This is true. But 99.99% of those ideas are bad ideas. The idea muscle
atrophies within days and most people dont exercise it.
Get a pad today (I use waiter pads) and start writing down ideas. Pick any topic: ideas
for businesses, ideas for how your neighbor can get more customers, ideas for novels,
etc. Doesnt matter. Cross out obviously bad ideas. Stretch your brain (it hurts, its like
a yoga stretch) to come up with 10 ideas. Okay, now come up with 10 more. Hurt
yourself.
Now, are these ideas doable? Cross off the ones that dont have a concrete next step.
Fill up the idea list to replace those you crossed off. Now, do you believe you can do
these ideas? Cross off the ones you cant or the ones you are not interested in. Replace
those on the idea list. Your brain should be sweating by the time you are done.
Note: you just wrote down ten bad ideas. Do this every day. Within six months
(assuming the other three areas of your life are healthy) youll be an idea machine.
Dont worry about that yet.
Now, execution. You just came up with ideas that have a concrete next step. So we
know you can execute (again, as long as health is ruling you).
But heres what VCs really care about: what have you learned so far?
In order to learn from your execution you need traction. You cant just have a product
(the first steps of execution) or a service but no traction. You need customers, users,
and a learning curve that includes at least one or two mistakes youve learned from
along the way. VCs want to hear what youve learned and how the business changed
because of those experiences.
Then that shows you have traction, which meant you executed, which meant you
developed an idea that they might be willing to fund.

NEGOTIATION
Is there such thing as good, honest and fair negotiator?
@socialhotchoco
A very good negotiator once told me, In a good negotiation, all sides walk away
happy. Everyone gets what they want.
If this doesnt happen, then the results of the negotiation will have negative
consequences down the road. Maybe people wont work as hard because they feel they
got the short end of the stick. Maybe lawsuits will develop, etc.
(See, The 3 Secrets of Negotiation http://bit.ly/sndKHq)

Is it better to settle with someone with no integrity that wronged

you in a business dispute and pay x or fight it and potentially pay
5x in fees? @ajwahls
Always: Settle, forgive, forget, move on. Life is short. Were a tiny dot in the Universe.
Our lifespans on this tiny dot are even tinier. Your interaction with this hateful person is
even tinier. Dont make it bigger than it needs to be in your short life on this tiny
planet.
Settle, and move on and get rich and happy. What could be a better answer than that?

TRADING
What advice would you give to someone like me who wants to
trade for a living but cant seem to get over fear of losing?
@MzAprilShowers
Anyone who is interested in trading has several features in common most of the time:
A)
Intelligent enough to do heavy research on companies or trading systems. I think
99% of traders realize they need to create an edge for themselves and this involves
hard work
B)

An ability to gamble

C)

They dont want to work for anyone else

These are similar (or the same) as features required by an entrepreneur. I think,
ultimately, daytrading is a losers game (See, 8 reasons not to daytrade
http://bit.ly/h028VG and you can use those same attributes to be an entrepreneur (See,
100 Ways to a be a better entrepreneur http://bit.ly/edLg2J).

Am I a fool for continuing to invest in the stock market? Im selfemployed and dont know how to build a nest egg these days.
@teashopgirl
You are not a fool at all although I would stay away from the stock market. Im bullish
on the market and the US economy. But I think too many people without experience
buy at the top and sell at the bottom and I also think there are only two types of people
who make money in the market:
A)

People with large stakes who hold forever (Buffett and Gates come to mind)

B)

People are wired right into the exchanges and make millions of trades a day.

Everyone in the middle gets slashed up and loses money.

I happen to own the childrens book Tea Shop Girl (the questioner) has written. When
you own stocks you get too distracted to write, particularly during downturns. Its also
very hard (Maybe impossible) to write a bestselling fiction book.
But, for someone already in the business, its possible to write series of books that get
consistent (but small advances) that could then produce steady streams of royalty. My
advice after more back and forth was to be prolific (Isaac Asimov, for instance, wrote
467 books) and write a 100 books in a series of children books.

Whats the next bubble? @Unpacktherat

This might be the wrong question. I dont think there will be any next bubbles. Bubbles
imply that an asset class goes up today simply because it went up yesterday (so more
and more people flock into it for no reason).
But, the next asset classes to experience enormous returns: biotech and energy.
Biotech because we have 70 million baby boomers retiring. And they are all going to get
sick and die horrible deaths. All of them. So whatever we can do to alleviate their pain
and extend their lives we will do. There will be pressure on the FDA to relax their
standards so drugs can get out the door. And more and more smallcapbiotechs will find
a new lease on life as their drugs are used to extend the lives of the retiring baby
boomers.
Energy because its getting cheaper to drill for oil (in the US) using the technology
called fracking, which gets oil that was previously hard and expensive to get. This will
transform the US into a new Saudi Arabia and reduce our dependence on middle
eastern oil. Of course, I also think social media will do well.

AMZN or AAPL?@ChicagoYak
Warren Buffett says that if a company is still going to be here 20 years from now then it
is probably a good investment (this isnt always true: Kodak, for instance, GM.
Bethlehem Steel, etc).
But clearly Apple is going to continue to innovate. Steve Jobs might be dead but the
actual designer of the iPod, iPhone, iPad is Johnny Ive who is very much alive and 44

years also. [See, Why AAPL will be the first trillion dollar company
http://bit.ly/gXYbfk]
And while bookstores are going out of business left and right, Amazon is continuing to
thrive and continuing to innovate in industries they were never in before (which
reminds me of Apple). I think one can put money in both these companies and never
look at them again. The never looking at them again is the key to investment success.

What do you think is the outlook for the US market in the next six
months? @artling
I can answer with a question: Why would the US market go down?. Companies like
Apple, Microsoft, Exxon, and Intel, all trade for less than 10 times forward earnings
(historical average is 15 times earnings) and they are all growing (Apple has grown
124% year over year), and they all have enormous cash.
Lets look at all the leading indicators that suggest the economy will be good 1 6
months from now:
A) rail traffic: up
B) hotel occupancy: up
C) retail sales up: 4% year over year
D) ISM manufacturing above 50, saying the economy is still expanding
E) unemployment claims at lowest level since May 2008
F) existing home sales up 18% year over year while housing starts at a low (i.e.
demand is up but supply is down so housing prices should go up)
I can go on and on. And the stock market is not necessarily related to the economy on
a daily basis but I do think the worst is behind us. And the market is in bear market
territory (or has been) so now we should get a strong bull market move and then we
have an election year which should be good. Also, when Zynga, Facebook, etc start
going public that should be strong for the market. And finally, when banks start lending
the $1.6 trillion they have in reserves (and commercial lending is already back full
force) then that should be good as well.
So basically: I think the US market is going to go straight up.

THE ECONOMY
What makes you so optimistic about the economy?
@billtheimpaler
There are really two answers to this: personal and public. The personal side is why
should you and I be optimistic right now about finding opportunity?
Right now, with everyone so pessimistic, is the best time to be optimistic. Theres $1.6
trillion extra dollars lying around in the banks. Corporate America has an extra $2 trillion
and theres untold trillions in pension funds, retirement accounts, etc that are
completely in cash. All of that money will eventually hit the economy. Any business
started now that is halfway good will get their hands on that money.
Getting that money is the equivalent of the Olympics.
You cant just hold your hand out and get an Olympic gold medal. You have to get in
shape. You have to start coming up with ideas. You have to get rid of the crappy people
in your life http://bit.ly/jyJFzP. You have to plan your exit from your corporate job
which sucks 10 hours of life (and 50% of your money via taxes) out of you each day.
You have to have gratitud http://bit.ly/pY3Qvs) for your health and for the loving
people around you.
Then you have to start coming up with ideas. What do 76 million retiring baby boomers
need? What do 750 million people on Facebook need? What do hundreds of thousands
of returning veterans need? And so on. Find the demographic trend, any of them, and
feed it. You will get paid for that.
But on a more public level: what makes me an optimist?
A) Rail traffic is up! What does this mean? It means people are shipping commodities
all over the country. Steel, oil, food, etc. Which means companies are about to start
building things, which means companies are seeing demand pick up so they are getting
ready to restock inventories, which are at lows. This indicator is almost never talked
about in the media outlets. All they talk about is a beach resort in Europe called Greece
which has nothing to do with us.

B) Hotel occupancy is up. What does this mean? It means business people are
traveling again. They are traveling because they are selling something. They dont
travel to sell without companies asking for those sales, putting out proposal requests,
etc. Things are moving.
C) Look at the statistics for Fedex.com (using a site like Compete.com). Its up. It
slipped a little when manufacturing dropped 15% in the summer in Japan because of
the Earthquake but now its back up. This means things are being shipped. Goods are
being sold. This doesnt mean the economic statistics will be good for last quarter. It
means it will be good for next quarter.
D) Housing starts up huge. Huge.The biggest since 2006. That means people will get
hired again to build houses. Thats a huge part of our economy.
E) Earnings are killing it. Intel is the bellwether for all technology. Technology has
driven the market (for better or for worse) for fifteen years. Intel is killing it. This
means people are buying computers and phones. Which means businesses are
expanding. AAPL, one of the fastest growing companies, trades for just 8 times forward
earnings and has $116 billion cash in the banks. These companies arent going
bankrupt and demand is not going down for their products.
And lets forget all about the basic economic statistics. Google is making cars that drive
around on highways without drivers. MIT scientists are working on quantum computers.
Every day theres more evidence on how to diagnose and cure various cancers.
We are a smart country, filled with innovators, and nobody comes even close. Sure,
maybe China will get close to us by 2050 but that just means they will become our
customers instead of just some random country selling us cheap goods.
Dont be a pessimist and hold a sign up and get angry. The time for opportunity is here.
Start planning for it.
You can say, Well, what about the Eurozone?
Let me tell you something about Greece:
Greece has only survived by the grace of its good friends since 40 BC. Julius Caesar
supported it, other countries supported it, all the way through Ronald Reagan who

supported it because of his terror of the Soviet Union. Since then, the Eurozone has
supported it. So everyone since 40 BC has known that Greece is what it is: a beach
resort on the Mediterranean. Nothing more, nothing less. They wont make the next
Google. And maybe theyll pay down their debt, maybe not. And then China will support
it. Who knows? But their issues, which have been known for 2000 years, will not bother
us one bit.
Wow, that was a big answer. Its almost a post by itself. Im going to get some
seaweed crackers before continuing onto the next questions.

If shit really hits the fan, what do you think is a good country for a
young American to move to? @M-Knopf
I have a scarcity complex. When I sold my first company it was 1998. I woke up one
morning at about 4am in a panic. In about 28 years I was going to go broke, I thought
to myself. And thats after I would make sure my parents and kids had millions of
dollars. I got out of bed and walked all over the city. I think I circled the entire
downtown Manhattan within about two hours. Just pacing and adding up numbers and
always coming up short. 28 years, 30 years if I cut this corner, 27 years though if I fall
down this alley.
Downtown Manhattan became a map of my scarcity, my feelings that I was never good
enough to make money, that I would never be good enough to hold onto it, that I
didnt deserve it in the first place, that eventually I would lose it all.
And guess what? I lost it all. Every single dime. Again and again, since Im always good
at coming up with more ideas. But for me, that feeling of scarcity is the hardest thing to
deal with. Why do I have it? I dont know the answer even now.
But let me tell you: nothing is hitting any fan. As Pinker shows, there is less violence in
the world now than ever before. Heck, we have toilets, we have literacy, we have the
iPad.
Are there people suffering? Yes. And our goal is to make the world better and help
them. We can all do that by people the best people we can be first. As Ive written
before, Occupy Yourself first http://bit.ly/snVZZr .

Dont spend your day worrying about whether some bank in Europe is going to default
to another bank in Europe. Lets not forget in 1981 that almost the entire continent of
South America defaulted. What happened after that? A 2 decade boom in the American
economy plus the widespread acceptance and rollout of the Internet, which changes
peoples lives every day.
Is there contemptuous behavior in the banks? In government (insider trading rampantly
abused by members of Congress where it is surprisingly legal).In all the alphabet city of
agencies in between the banking world and the government?In the lobbyists?In the
candidates? Of course! But Occupy Yourself first.
Dont run scared to another country. They arent better. They are, for the most part, far
worse. When Havel became leader of the Czech Republic in the velvet revolution I
was inspired by his first official talk where he suggested change comes from within. He
was right, but it still didnt necessarily mean people would listen to him or that the
Czech Republic would flourish under his rule.
Focus on every day improving the energy you emanate out to the rest of the world.
Then you can live anywhere and be happy and successful and a beacon to others.

What are your thoughts on Greece? @jamesketchell

AAAARGH! Greece! I am so sick of this country already. We first even heard of Greece
in May 2010. There were some rumblings. They couldnt pay their debt and everyone
wanted to retire by some early age what? 24 years old they wanted to retire. And
then hang out on the beach and get paid by the government.
Then suddenly everyone in the media became experts on the word contagion.
Somehow these beach-goers were going to spread their vile debt contagion throughout
the rest of Europe, then the US, then China and Asia and the entire world would
collapse. But James, anchors would say to me on TV, cant you see how Greece
could create a domino effect Blah blahblah. One more blah: Blah!
Let me tell you some fun facts about Greece:
A)

Its 0.15% of the worlds population.

B)
If you go to Greece (or, in my case, if you go to a pool hall in Astoria, NY which is
almost entirely populated by Greek people, and many of the waitresses at the Greek
diners were too beautiful for me despite the fact that I wrote my phone number down
on $2 bills that I gave out as tips) they have three types of backgammon that they play
as opposed to our one. No wonder they want to retire so early!
C) The Greek debt divided by the Eurozone GDP is similar to Rhode Islands debt
divided by the US GDP. If Rhode Island defaulted I wouldnt care either. Rhode Island,
also btw, is a beach resort. Just like Greece.
D)
Most important: Since the time of Augustus in 20 BC, Greeces bills have been
paid by other countries. All the way up to Ronald Reagan in 1989 who was terrified the
Soviet Union would have access to the Mediterranean so kept paying Greeces bills. So
the EU knew this going into the situation that Greece can not live without the kindness
of strangers. This has been known for 2030 years!
E)
In 1981, the top 5 banks in the US were 263% exposed to South American
countries that totally defaulted! Zero! Thank god the word contagion had not been
invented yet by some media Einstein. What happened next in the US? 20 year Stock
market boom!
So okay, whats our exposure to not only Greece but lets throw in Portugal, Spain,
Ireland, Italy. Other than Ireland, all prior leaders of the world.Total exposure in the
top 5 US banks? 8% Glory Be! You know what this means? It means I should never be
able to turn on the TV and hear the word Greece unless I am watching some
backgammon tournament on ESPN 3.

I know you dont think Greece is a big deal, but what about Italy?
Big deal, maybe or nothing?@wesbroxson
Youre right. Greece, with 0.15% of the worlds population, and a similar affect on the
EU GDP as Rhode Island has on the US GDP, doesnt concern me at all.
Italy is of course bigger, and one of the largest borrowers in the world. But lets not
forget, the headlines were all panicky about Greece. So now they are all panicky about
Italy. So you have to take headlines with a grain of salt and lets look at the reality:

Italy managed to borrow $150 billion the other day at much lower yields than people
had predicted.
I looked down the list of the largest banks that lent Italy money and I did not see ANY
US banks on that list.
Italy, unlike Greece, is made up of people who are increasing their savings rather than
decreasing it. So the money is there and now its up to the government to get them to
spend it (as opposed to putting in austerity measures).
Mario Monti, an economist, will be the new Prime Minister and provide a much needed
injection of confidence than the scandal-prone Berlosconi
Lets not forget, NOBODY in Europe has actually defaulted yet. And our top 5 banks
have only 8% exposure to all the PIIGS countries.
Compare this with 1981: Almost the entire continent of South America defaulted. And
our top banks were 263% (!) exposed to their debt. What happened? We went on a 20
year stock market boom.
So I dont read the news. I dont panic. I ignore the headlines. Italy is a nice place to
eat dinner and sight see but Im not going to ever think again about their debt.

Do you still believe the Dow might be up 8,000 points or more in

the next several years? @redwings924
Im an optimist on America. Whenever things seem like they are roughest, the market
mistress has a way of doing her dance to confound all of her greatest lovers.
Right now we have:
A)
B)
C)
D)
E)
F)
G)

$1.6 trillion in the banks

$2 trillion in cash in the non-banks
Another $3 trillion or so in pension funds and savings accounts.
Railway traffic is up
Hotel occupancy is up
Corporate earnings are up
Fedex.com website stats are up

H) Inventories are low

I) Existing home sales are up with new home starts down (supply vs demand will
create an imbalance eventually)
J) Very few IPOs
K) Large numbers of stock buybacks, the greatest in history (again, supply and
demand. More shares being removed from supply).
All the conditions are set for not only a boom but a bubble. Are bubbles bad? Not for
me to judge. But Its good to be on the right side of one if you can get there. Is
America doomed ultimately? Who knows. We may have massive problems in the next
few years as we continue to transform and suffer through the continued nursery school
education of our leaders (both Democrat and Republican). And we may suffer through
massive inflation. But the best hedge is buying the stocks that are continuing to
innovate and do well. Or starting your own company (which is ultimately the best way
to ride a rising stock market, rather than buying stocks that are largely manipulated by
unseen power-players).

Do you have any post on this topic:Bubbles, and how its different
than the 1st dot-com? @eycsound
Definitely not. This is the dream of Internet 1.0 come true. What was that dream? That
everything would be available, all the time online, cheaper, and we can communicate
with anyone we wanted around the world, and of course, we could have more sex with
more people than we could have thought possible.
Whats the proof?
These are not BS companies. Say what you want about Groupon, it is the fastest
growing company (in revenues) in history. Say what you want about Zynga it is the
fastest growing company (in profits) in history. Say what you want about the old dotcom companies: AMZN, EBAY, and lets throw GOOG (which came a little late to the
game) and AAPL, they are all near all-time highs in value, revenues, and profits (which
sort of suggests that even Internet 1.0 wasnt a bubble, it was more of a way for the
public to play VC. In the VC model there will be zeros and home runs. The public wasnt
used to this, so labeled it a bust which it wasnt really given the number of companies
from then that are at all-time highs now, 1000s% higher).
Internet companies deliver value, help the lives of consumers, and make enterprises get

their own jobs done cheaper (the true cause for 9% unemployment is that the Internet
created dead weight, just like the invention of machinery for agriculture ultimately
ended slavery (not to compare slavery for dead weight but the only reason the south
was so intent on keeping them was because they had no alternative of getting their
fields tilled, harvested, planted, seeded, whatever). Each generation of the Internet will
eliminate deeper levels of corporate slavery. Its our duty:
A) To not wonder about boom or bust but take advantage of all the new technologies
at our disposal.
B) Constantly seek to learn what they are (I am woefully behind. Already turning into
an old man in my young age).
C)

To free ourselves from the boundaries we thought possible.

Long live Internet 2.0

How do you think in this bleak environ small financial services

companies will survive? Or how can they? @thefridayguy
So, he really asked a slightly different question but Im broadening it. Let me tell you
the truth: in any sector, in any economy, in any political environment, your only
competition is yourself. 99.9999% of the people out there are unhealthy (i.e. they dont
exercise their physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual bodies as per the Daily
Practice). So they are not your competition. You just have to make sure the luck flows
your way and it does if you keep healthy on all four of those legs of the chair this world
sits on.
Dont forget: GroupOn, the fastest growing revenues company in history started in
November, 2008, the worst financial month in history since the Great Depression.
I never think about the economy. Theres 5 trillion in unspent cash marinating all over
the economy, doing nothing, because people are afraid.
Your job is to be healthy and help make them unafraid. To spend that 5 trillion in
cash.On you.

NETWORKING
I am in a wedding with a lot of high level executives. Should I
network? @YoavEzer
I get invited to the occasional dinner where there are a lot of people I would like to
network with (See, Someone wanted to throw a grenade at me http://bit.ly/odzxqm).
The best way to network with someone cold (i.e. you dont know them and know
nobody in common) is to give them ideas that can help them make money. If you know
who will be at the wedding, research their businesses, come up with 10 ideas for each
person how they can improve their business.
Its not like you are going to go up to them and say, here are 10 ideas for your
business. But now if you are sitting next to them or find yourself casually talking to any
of the people you want to network with, you are ready to instantly go into networkmode if the conversation starts to veer in the direction of their business.
Practicing this ability will get you better and better at it until you no longer have to
come up with the lists in advance. Youll be an idea machine at any event, able to
manage the balance between casual conversation and idea generation with ease, and
everyone will say, we should have a meeting/coffee/lunch about this over the next
week!

How to approach and connect with the #1 top notch people if

youre young and ambitious? @joTorsvik
This has happened to me on several occasions. It happened to me when I wanted to
get my first real job. It happened to me when I launched my first business. It happened
to me when I transitioned my career 360 degrees (twice) and on a daily basis it
happens to me.
There is a few things you need to keep in mind, for example:

A)
Develop ideas and give them away for free to the top people in your field. 1 out
of 10 will respond. Not because the other 9 are bad people but the ideas might not
work for them or they might just be busy. OR, the ideas might be bad. So you have to
keep practicing the idea muscle and keep sending out the ideas. Why for free? Because
you have to give in order to receive http://bit.ly/fi1mHC.
B)
For more: 9 Ways To Become a Super-Connector http://bit.ly/uIRaLl. These ideas
work no matter how young you are.
Here are the nine ways I wrote about:
1. INTRODUCE TWO OTHER CONNECTORS this is an unbelievable technique. If you
can introduce two people who are themselves great connectors then you become a
meta-connector. They will meet and get along (connectors get along with each other
for two reasons: THEY ARE NATURALLY FRIENDLY PEOPLE (hence their ability to connect so
easily with people) AND THEY HAVE A LOT OF FRIENDS IN COMMON almost by definition.) If you
are in the middle of that connection then they will always remember you and youll
always be on their mind for future potential connections they can make that would be
useful for you. And their rolodexes are immense. So if you need to meet Prince William
of England, for instance, or Ellen Degeneres then just connect two connectors and the
next thing you know youll be dancing right down the aisle with Ellen on her show or
bowing to Kate Middleton, or whatever you want to do. Ellen? Kate? Uma?
2. INTRODUCE TWO PEOPLE WITH AN IDEA IN MIND: Marsha, meet Cindy. Cindy,
meet Marsha. Marsha, you are the best book editor in the world. Cindy, your book is
the best book idea I have ever heard. You both can make money together. No need to
cc me.
In other words, if you can help two other people make money then eventually, good
things will happen to you. In cases where Ive been able to do this (rare, but its
happened) I always tell people who say what can I do for you that if they ever find
me in the gutter with blood leaking from my mouth and a needle sticking out of the
veins in my elbow then at the very least pull the needle out. Thats all I ask. The first
time I ever did this I went home (1994) and told my girlfriend, I just helped two
people make money for the first time ever. And she said, yeah, but what did you
get? I got nothing. But I felt something. I felt like I had done good in the world and
that if I kept doing it, eventually it would return to me. And it did. With those very two
people that first time but years later.

3. HAVE A DINNER OF INTERESTING PEOPLE. Ive only done this twice. When the last
Star Wars prequel came out I invited people from every aspect of my life (friends,
hedge funds, writers) to a dinner, I got everyone movie tickets, and it was a fun night.
I solidified my relationships with some of my investors, plus some of the funds I was
invested in, and I managed to connect people up who later did business together. On
another occasion I threw a party for everyone who had been fired by thestreet.com. It
got a little awkward when the guy who had done most of the firing (who had himself
been fired right before then) was also there but it was all in good fun. Not sure how
much goodwill it created for me. Too early to tell.
But, I much more enjoy going to the dinner that Im invited to. [See,"Why a Grenade
Needs to Get Thrown At Me"]. Ive met a lot of interesting people. My main problem is
that my normal bedtime is about 8pm. So sometimes I fall asleep at the table and
everyone thinks Im on drugs. And other times I just cant go to the dinner because I
know I wont be functional the next morning when I like to write. But sometimes I go
just because my wife Claudia gets sick of having me around all the time and pushes me
out the door. So please keep inviting me.
4. FOLLOWING UP. This is the hardest part for me. I have a list five years old of people
who introduced me to people I actually wanted to be introduced to and then I never
followed up. For instance, a few months ago I wrote a postBurton Silverman, are you
dead yet?? Burton Silverman is one of my favorite artists. I wanted to know if he was
dead to see if the value of one of his paintings had gone up. Guess what? He wrote me
to tell me he wasnt dead yet. And as I type this, his studio is only a few blocks away. I
could visit him right now if I want.
Exceptfor some reason I never returned his email. Hes on my list. But followup is my
hardest part. Then I put it off until I start to feel guilty about not following up. So then
I push back the follow-up even more. At my first company I hired someone to follow up
for me. Claudia tells me she will follow up for me on emails. But I have a hard time
letting other people do things for me that I should really be doing for myself.
But needless to say, if you make a connection, its so easy to keep it by just saying,
hey, it was great meeting you. Lets do that again in a month or so. Why the hell cant
I ever do easy things? Instead of writing this post I could simply write an email to 400
people on my list, including Silverman. Something is mentally wrong with me.
5. RE-ESTABLISHING CONTACT. The other day I was following my own advice. Im on
the 21 Day Gratitude Diet I discuss in the post How Being Grateful Can Make You

Rich. I wrote an email to an ex-investor of mine from 2004 saying sincerely how
grateful I was he invested with me and I always enjoyed his advice and friendship. He
immediately wrote back (because, unlike me, hes a good connector and businessman)
and said, what are you up to? Heres what Im doing. Maybe we can work together
again. This is 6 years after I last spoke to him. Guess what. Hes now on the list I
mentioned in #4 above. Hes #401 on the list. But Ill get back to him. Maybe later
today.After I get my drivers license. Because I promised Claudia 3 months ago that I
would get it today although today means that day three months ago.
6. SHOW UP. I dont know which rule on this list is the most valuable. But if a good
connector invites you to a dinner or a meeting, then the best thing you can do is show
up. I was invited to a party of 40 bloggers the other night. The guy doing the inviting
was Michael Ellsberg who recently wrote the bestseller, The Education of Millionaires.
More on him in a second. I probably shouldve gone. But 9pm! Thats like 8 hours past
my bedtime. Still, I shouldve gone. Next time!
7. INTERVIEW PEOPLE.Back to Michael Ellsberg. This was genius. He figured he wanted
to meet a lot of successful people (sort of like how Napoleon Hill did this when he wrote
the bestseller Think and Grow Rich). So he got himself a book deal about how
millionaires are educated and then, book deal in hand, he interviewed as many
billionaires as he could find. The guy is now a MEGA-Connector. When I met him a few
weeks ago he had non-stop ideas about how one goes about meeting people. He
should give conferences or do coaching on this one aspect alone. Meanwhile, theres
meI blew off his party last night and didnt respond to his last email. Hes on my list
of emails to return.
Ive done this technique to some extent. Writing for the Wall St Journal or Financial
Times it was always fairly easy to get people on the phone or meet them at a breakfast.
But I had a hard time following up. Anthony Scaramucci, for instance, is a well-known
finance guyrunning one of the biggest funds of funds and also running the annual
SALT conference where guys like Bill Clinton and Vladmir Putin will speak on the same
stage (Mike Tyson had to break up the fist fight). I met Scaramucci through my writing
(he has also written a book) and we had breakfast together and he asked me to run a
panel at his SALT conference. Guess what? I didnt follow up. I didnt even return the
calls of people on his staff. Bad James!
When I was at HBO, I interviewed people for a living. The only problem is they were
mostly transvestite prostitutes. But, I did get to meet the producers and creators of

one of my favorite shows, Taxicab Confessions. This was back in 1996. One of them
called me recently and wanted to get together. And guess what?
8. PRODUCE SOMETHING OF VALUE. In order to connect two people, you must have
people to connect. You have to meet them in the first place. The best way to do that is
to produce something of value. In this post I described about how when I was broke
and about to go homeless I tried a technique of just reaching out to people. I would
write letters like, Hey, would love to meet. That never worked. People are busy.
Nobody wanted to meet some random guy like me. So instead I tried a new technique.
For each person I wanted to meet I would spend time researching their business and
come up with 10 ideas that would help them that I would just completely give for free.
With one guy (Jim Cramer), I came up with ten article ideas he should write. He
ultimately wrote back, YOU should write these and that started my financial writing
career. It also developed a culture of exchanging ideas with thestreet that ultimately led
to me selling Stockpickr.com to them. With another guy, I gave him several trading
system ideas and he ultimately allocated money for me to trade. This started my hedge
fund trading career.
I then write my first book about trading. Which led to Fidelity inviting me to speak at
conferences, a good way to meet people. My next two talks for them are in Scottsdale,
AZ and Las Vegas in the next few weeks. Ive been giving talks for them since 2004. I
havent raised my prices since then because Im always too shy to talk about money
except in passive-aggressive ways like writing this blog post.
9. TIME. I woke up for a few minutes at 3am this morning to write this list. Then I went
back to sleep, figuring Id write the post when I woke up. The last item on the list I
wrote at 3am is Time. But for the life of me I have no idea why I wrote it. If anyone
can help me solve this mystery Id be grateful.

What is the best way to get the chance to pitch your product to
big corporate business? Just call up the CEO out of the blue? They
dont care? @NickHarleyNZ
The question answers itself with the healthy skepticism at the end. So I agree with
what Nick is saying: you cant just call the CEO out of the blue and they do in fact care.
A good recipe for failure is to have one idea that fits one business and then they will
almost surely reject you, even if you get through to the CEO, which is almost
impossible.

A recipe for success then is the reverse.

Have ten ideas for thirty businesses. And then move up the ladder, pitching the head of
business development at each company. Or using your network to find people at the
company you can pitch to.
Will all 30 respond? No! But 6 will. And 3 will want meetings. And 2 might like one of
the ten ideas. And one will say yes.
And thats all you need.

SUPERPOWERS
What power, if any do parents have to give to their children? Selfconfidence? @Pcostanzo
I wasnt a self-confident kid. I thought I was too ugly. I thought kids wouldnt like me
unless I was special at something, or unless I gave them something as a gift, or unless
I lied to them so I would seem more special than I am.
I have no idea what my parents did right or wrong. Certainly I know they did many
things right.
But I know, for my own kids, the best way I can teach them to be self-confident is for
me to be self-confident and for me to have values.
Their only comparison in life as they grow older will be their parents. If I demonstrate
the right values and the right confidence then they will become the beacon to others
that I hope for them.
(See also, I want my daughters to be lesbians http://bit.ly/jdvDH2)

Batman or Spiderman? -@GonzaloGandia

Normally I dont like to answer personal questions (because they might not be
interesting to anyone other than me) like this BUT: this is an interesting one.
Most people would say Batman because he built himself up without having any
powers at all and became a kick-ass superhero. However, several things are very
important about the batman story:
A) Batman started off super-rich, which gives its own form of superpowers right from
the beginning
B) Batman had a track record of putting young people into tiny shorts and serious
danger (the young Dick Grayson / Robin)

C) Batman was so emotionally screwed up because of his parents deaths that he was
never able to have a normal relationship with a woman or any friend really. Instead,
perhaps his main romance was with Catwoman, who was mostly emotionally
unavailable to him and was also a criminal.
Now lets take Spiderman.
Peter Parker was me (and perhaps you). A nerdy, shy, kid with glasses that was
picked on by the cool kids, who wanted to get the girl but didnt know how.
Peter Parker had to balance the challenges of real life (making money, having
relationships, studying for school, etc) with the responsibility he chose to take on
(helping people).
-

Peter Parker constantly had the media against him. Bruce Wayne rarely did.

Peter Parker got his powers from a mis-use of radioactive material. As did the
Hulk, the Fantastic Four, and many other heroes created in the 60s. With the rise of the
nuclear age, we must always be wary of misuse of powers we dont understand. Even
with the cybernetic extensions to our personality that social media provides we must
never forget that with great power comes great responsibility and that the challenge
of remaining human in the onslaught of technology must remain utmost in our minds.

How do we gain more confidence and be sure on what we say? (In

case people are trying to bring us down) @Jas_Cheng
A) Try as hard as you to not be around people who are trying to bring you down.
Walk away. Dont engage. Dont talk to them unless needed. This part of my advice on
How to Avoid Crappy People http://bit.ly/jyJFzP). A few months ago I sent an email
to a formerly close friend of mine saying how glad I was that he had once been in my
life. He wrote back with a litany of all the reasons I was a bad person. No problem.
Now if he ever tries to write me it instantly filters into the Spam box and I dont even
see it. Thats how you deal with crappy people (along with what I suggest in the above
link)
B)

If you have an artery that is clogged, then blood doesnt get through properly. You

get heart disease and eventually have a heart attack. You might die from the heart
attack.
So Im about to explain what I really believe in philosophically. We dont have one body.
We have four, and they are all mirrors of each other:
Physical, Emotional, Mental, Spiritual. And theres one virtual blood that flows back
and forth between all of them to keep the whole entity (the I) alive. If the bodies are
not aligned, then the virtual blood gets clogged.
When the virtual blood gets clogged: heart attacks happen in one or more of the
bodies. Or heart disease, or some other discomfort. This leads to self-doubt, sickness,
and other bad things. When the bodies are not aligned, you cant have confidence. You
cant have success. You cant get off the floor and find motivation or be creative. You
cant be a beacon to others.

GOVERNMENT / POLITICS

Who will you vote for for President? - TschadErdstrm

@TheSlycophant
I vote for Nobody for President. What has the President done for me lately? Any
President. Name me one President that didnt increase our military presence or destroy
our economy in some form or other.
Right now the US has a military presence in 130 countries and we are bombing six
countries. Plus there are rumblings about war with Iran. Is this not the height of
insanity? Is my way of life really being protected when we bomb and kill little babies
elsewhere? And spend trillions of dollars that could have been spent to help the lives of
people right here in the United States?
Here is what the President can do according to the Constitution: he can veto bills and
he can sign treaties. Two things he hardly ever does. He can also MAKE SUGGESTIONS
to Congress. And he can throw parties for visiting dignitaries. I think thats about it.
Without looking, can you think of anything else he can do according to the constitution?
Lets not forget also: the Constitution was written before phones, before the Internet,
before even the telegraph. So there was no way to get the issues out to the masses.
Why not set up Internet balloting for vetoes and treaties and even all laws? People say,
Well then 51% of the people will vote to suppress 49% of the people. And to that I
say, Are you crazy? What 51%? Instead, there will actually be discussion about the
issues in a way that is not controlled by Super PACS run by Sheldon Adelson or George
Soros, two people who do not have the interests of most people at heart.
My thoughts on the GOP Primary? A travesty. A circus run by the media and the SuperPACS. The final ticket will be Romney-Rubio and Obama-Clinton. And then an election
will happen.

And then hopefully, no matter who the winner is, we get Google Glasses and an I-pad 8
and some more cures for cancer that hopefully the FDA, in their infinite stupidity,
doesnt try to squash. Innovation will cure America. Not a President or a congressman,
or higher or lower taxes. A society is made up of people. If each individual finds the
strength inside themselves to take the next step, then thats the only next step for a
country.

What will it take for the GOP to accept tax hike on the rich?
@ericmontas
They will never agree.
Eric then asked, thats unfortunate because how will the government raise revenues?
My answer to that was: to raise revenues government should stop corruption, pork {DO
YOU MEAN P.O.R.K.?}, and pull back military from 120 countries, close useless agencies
(like the FDA), close various government branches (like Congress and the Presidency)
and also start finding assets that they can sell and be put to better use in private
industry, like national highways.
Altogether, my suggestions would save trillions of dollars. Massive demilitarization
alone, which kills civilians all over the world, would save 100x more than taxing people
who make over $1 million. Not that Im excusing the bank CEOs who got away with
murder in 2008 and then gave themselves bonuses but shareholders, rather than the
government, need to get more active and stop that. The government has four tools to
raise money: raise taxes, print money, sell assets, and spend less. I think the latter two
are the best methods for the economy as a whole.

Should the government control CEO bonuses? @SteathAviator

You mean the same US government with 9% unemployment and military actions in 120
countries and 2 major wars? The same government that cant get rid of deadlock over
the debt ceilings, etc.? How many things have the government botched in the past
decade? 9/11, wars in Iraq and Afghanistan with no exit strategy. Countless deadlocks,
roadblocks, etc. between Congress and the President.
Why do you now want them to control salaries? How will they botch that also?
Shareholders need to ultimately hold the heads of their companies responsible for

misdeeds. Were going through a transforming time. Using the government will only
postpone that transformation because now well have too many parties to blame.
Im really disgusted with all politics and not any politician in general. This is obviously
nothing new. Most people share that belief. But lets act on it. We can actually Abolish
The Presidency and life would be a lot better.

ABOLISHING THE PRESIDENCY

Are you running for President? If so, when you are elected, would
you abolish Congress and eventually the Presidency? @bgn2end
Ha, the problem with the Presidency is that at some point you have to decide that a
little child is going to die at your hands (through war, military action, etc). But heres
what I would do if elected and had the power to do these things
A)
Abolish Congress and replace it with an Internet voting system. The only reason
Congress exists is because there was no means to communicate important issues
around the country when the Founding Fathers existed. [See, July 4 is a Scam
http://bit.ly/kNkZ66]
B)
Abolish the FDA. They make lethal substances legal: most chemicals are
unregulated, alcohol and nicotine are lethal, and they keep drugs that cure people out
of the hands of old people who need that one last chance to survive. [See, Eliminate
the FDA http://bit.ly/q8NBdW]
C)
I would abolish every cabinet position. What do we need a Department of
Education for? Education in the US has only gone down since that Department was
created. What do we need a Housing Department for. We had a housing crisis and
nobody helped. What do we need a State Department for? Rarely or treaties negotiated
and we should stop giving all of our money to foreign countries anyway. What do we
need a Department of Defense for? We havent legally declared war since 1941. If you
go to Washington DC you see these long enormous buildings down every street that do
nothing but bureaucracy.
D)
all.

Id appoint myself Vice-President. Someone has to go to funerals of kings after

E)
Id sell off every federal asset: highways, the IRS, federal lands, trains, etc to
raise money to pay down debt so that taxes can also be reduced.
F)

Id abolish the Presidency [See, Abolish the Presidency http://bit.ly/rjISwx]

A lot of people who are politically minded disagree with me on some of these things.
But the reality is. If we had the bravery to do all of the above then life would be better.
People still would obey Stop signs (there are local governments to handle this) and they
still wouldnt kill people and our way of life would still be defended since our greatest
offense is now global capitalism and innovation.

Who is your favorite president? @lakergodSK

There really was only one good President and the rest were failures: George
Washington: He stayed above the fray of party politics. He basically turned down a
lifetime Presidency at the end of his two terms, recognizing that a country needed
change and not succumbing to his own ego.
Everyone else had their shortcomings. Of course, its easy to say that in hindsight and
Id be happy to discuss this further in the comments but who else was good? One
person mentioned to me FDR but: the Depression lasted a full 7 years longer when he
became President. None of his policies worked towards solving the Great Depression.
None of them. He got us into WW II only after all the Jews were being demolished by
Germany. He even turned away Jews who were trying to escape to America. How many
Americans died once we got into WWII? He tried to flout the Constitution by stuffing
the Supreme Court. He ran for 4 terms, the first since George Washington to even
attempt to stay more than two.
Well, what about Lincoln? My question is: why didnt he free the slaves immediately?
Isnt that what it was about? Turns out the answer is no. He let his VP run the Union
Army. And then, when the North was losing, he freed the slaves to try and get a little
extra help. The Civil War was fought about the Norths need to get a piece of the cotton
action in the South via tariffs. Nothing else.Which is why the British (who freed their
slaves in 1832) were eager to get the North out of the picture (slavery issue aside) and
help the South. Money trumped the horrible sin against nature of slavery. Thats
Lincoln.
Anyone else?
Finally, what does the President actually do? As per the Constitution. I think its time we
revise things and Abolish The Presidency http://bit.ly/rjISwx altogether and actually
save the economy in doing so.

What is the best form of goverment? @MarquesDeeClairMarc

Politics is largely a scam.
Heres whats important to me: I dont want people to run stop signs. Sometimes
interesections are confusing. Its good when a local government figures out where
those interesections are and put up stop signs. Im not speaking metaphorically but
literally. We need stop signs.
What else do we need? We dont need to go to war with anyone? I dont really think we
need to give our hard-earned money to any other countries. Experiments like the Dept
of Education have largely failed as have most government initiatives. What else do we
need? I just dont want my kids crossing the street and then someone running them
over because there were no stop signs. Im in favor of the Stop Sign Party.

Any political predictions for 2012? @socialhotchoco

I have no preferences one way or the other. Everyone thought Obama was going to
bring peace. Instead were bombing six countries and have military in 130 others,
healthcare is more complicated than ever, taxes are killing us right in the middle of
economic troubles, etc. And Bush was no better. And Clinton, Bush, Reagan, Ford,
Nixon, Johnson, Eisenhower, Truman, Roosevelt, Hoover, etc. etc. was no better.
Everyone says Ron Paul has no chance even though I find him to be strikingly honest
for a politician and hes winning in the polls. It reminds me of a stock I once owned. I
called another hedge fund manager who had 10 million shares of it. He said, listen,
this stock is going to go from $1 to $5 and then shortsellers are going to spread nasty
untre rumors about it and it will fall back into the$2s until the next move up. He was
exactly right and Ron Paul reminds me of that stock right now.
Id really like to be surprised and find a President who actually makes my life better. But
I dont think it will happen which is why I think we should Abolish the Presidency
http://bit.ly/rjISwx and take it one step further: Abolish Congress http://bit.ly/kNkZ66.
Then I think life will be better. But those things are not going to happen. So I never
rely on politics for my happiness. Or its outcomes.
But, like anyone, I enjoy watching the sporting event of it.

So my one prediction, whether I like this prediction or not, is:

Republicans: Romney is the Presidential candidate and Chis Christie is the VP candidate.
This keeps both Wall Street and the Tea party happy and they raise a zillion dollars.
Democrats: Obama is the Presidential candidate and Hilary Clinton is the surprise VP
candidate. Hilarys served her time. Biden is nobody. And Obama needs and extra
oomph to overcome his poor ratings. After that, its a close race. Its hard to unseat a
sitting President.

RELIGION, GOOD, EVIL

Can you talk about morality? Is it universal or relative?
@jonathankyou
Very little of morality is relative.
I did a post about a year ago that provoked some discussion on other websites. The
post was Was Buddha a Bad Father? http://bit.ly/gk1aC1. Buddha was prince with
everything: a kingdom, a beautiful wife, a newborn son.
So what did he do on the night his son was born? In the middle of the night, when
everyone was asleep (so he didnt have to say goodbye) he rode off on his quest for
enlightenment.
On other blogs people wrote I didnt understand the relative morality of what was
happening. That fatherhood was different then. Okay, maybe. Its an interesting
discussion to me.
But, more interesting to me (and something none of the other blogs commented on
when trashing me on this topic) was much later when Buddha finally came to scoop up
his son and teach him about life and morality.
He gave perhaps his most powerful and useful sermon in all the Pali Canon (the
collection of works containing Buddhas actual thoughts instead of the meassive hearsay
which has gotten passed down through the ages). He basically said: before, during,
and after a thought, action or speech, consider whether or not you are hurting
someone
So this was a guy giving a moral rule 2,500 years ago, 12,000 miles away. This rule is
still an important rule and one that many people ignore. Every day I see trolls on the
Internet trying to hurt people. People in the news trying to hurt each other. Politicians
and businessmen trying to backstab each other.
Nobody follows this universal rule of morality. I hope I can follow it. But its very hard.

Notably, I believe its the last mention of Buddhas son in Buddhist scriptures. So maybe
he couldnt follow it either. I dont know.

How do you personally define morality? What is good? What is

evil? @jmorgenstern
I wrote a post about this once that nobody read. First off, I dont consider myself
religious in any sense. As I write this today, it is Rosh Hashanah. I dont even know
how to spell that. Im also not a Buddhist, Hindu, whatever. But I do think its
interesting to see what texts have withstood the test of time over thousands of years.
Its the same as music. If a song withstands the test of time, compared with thousands
of other songs, then you know theres something good about it. Like if a failed Britney
Spears did a cover of John Lennons song, Imagine then you know it would be a hit.
So I am constantly reading somewhat obscure spiritual texts from a long time ago.
I wrote a post, Was Buddha a Bad Father. The details of the post are not that
important to this question but one speech that Buddha made to his son Rahula where
he said, before, during, and after everything you do (speech, action, etc.) make you
sure are not about to harm anyone, are not harming anyone, and did not harm
anyone.
In other words, he is defining Evil. Everything else is Good.
When we are good, we are on our way to Happiness. Since harming others causes
undue stress. I discuss this in my latest book: I Was Blind But Now I Can See
http://amzn.to/qM8kLi.

How do you Find Ethics Without a religion? @jonathankyou

Its an interesting question when you add the especially when you dont have a religion
to tell you. Ask, Who told Buddha? or Who told Jesus? or Who told Lao Tzu? I
suppose you can say God did and then he asked them to transmit it to you. But I think
better to find directly.

Why do people need religion? Often they get religion because they were born into it
and stick to it for cultural reasons. Often people find deeper religion because they feel
an emptiness or fear (of death) so they want to fill that emptiness with a path.
A path that goes from one emptiness toanother? We dont know. Better to always go
from strength to strength.
So how can you fill that initial emptiness without a path? How can you make it all work
out so that all paths turn around and point to you instead? I think the basic tenet that
permeates most religions is DO NO HARM. It can be thought of in another way: We do
three things throughout the day: we do things, we say things, we think things.
On any of these things, theres a before, during, and an after. So my one rule of ethics,
regardless of religion, is: BEFORE, DURING OR AFTER, I SAY, THINK, OR ACT, I HAVE TO REALLY
ASK: AM I HURTING SOMEONE AND, IF NOT, AM I LYING TO SOMEONE?
If your answer at any point during that above question is yes, then stop. Thats ethics
without a religion.
Will you find heaven then? Will your find the end path of your religion? Who knows? But
you will be happier and so will the people around you (since they wont be hurt by your
words, actions, or thoughts). And when the people around you are happier, the people
around them will be happier. And thats how a happy society can start. Unfortunately,
most people, with religion or not, dont do this.

What are your thoughts (if any) of the expanding Atheist

movement i.e.: Sam Harris, Richard Dawkins, etc.? @mczirjack
Atheism is almost a one-word oxymoron. Its an organized religion against organized
religions. But they still try to keep all of the trappings of an organized religion: every
professional atheist tries to lay out an ethical system.
I could think of myself as an atheist also I dont believe in a man with a beard who
magically created the Universe. Then I can lay out an existential system of ethics and
ways for men to deal with each other without the words under God hanging over
them.
Most people forget that Buddha was an atheist. And that even in orthodox Judaism

there is no real word for God.

I prefer, for myself, to develop a system of happiness, to eliminate the constant
brainwashing that occurs around me, and to try to enjoy life today.
In terms of the question: Do I believe in a higher power? I would have to answer that
I do believe in the concept of SURRENDER which may or may not imply a higher power
(who knows?).
In other words, many situations get so difficult you want to throw up your hands and
just say, you know what, I did all I can. I leave the rest up to you. And who is that
you? It might be a higher power. It might be a creative force inside of you that is dying
for those moments to be unleashed. Or it might simply be the feeling of gratitude that
is always worth cultivating to help one find more happiness in life.

CHARITY
What are your views on how much charity one should give away,
both annually and life? @MarktMovr
Heres my simple view. Then I have two posts on my expanded view.
A charity gives money from the interest it makes on the money it has in the bank. Part
of that interest goes to administrative costs and salaries. Part of it goes to actually
putting the money to work for charitable good.
So if you give $100, and the charity makes 3% interest, then maybe $2 of your money
will actually go towards real charity per year. Is that what you intended?
My view is: Be a superhero.
Find situations that right now, directly need your anonymous help. Then save the world.
Do it for ego reasons. Do it because you want to help. Do it because lives will be saved.
Put your $100 to work , and your valuable time to work, in situations where you can
actually see the lives being saved. You will help many more people that way. Do 10%
of your salary that way for the rest of your life. Lives will be saved, people will be
grateful, and you will be transformed from mild mannered so-and-so to Superman from
a planet in a far away galaxy.
Here is my post on the topic: 10 Reasons Why I Would Never Donate to a Major Charity
orhow to be a Superhero http://bit.ly/j8WikY.

What do you think is the best way to give back to society as an

individual? @alyosha19
Everything comes from you. If you work at a charity but beat your kids at night then
you have failed to give back to society. The best way to give back to society is to make
sure you are healthy.

PHYSICALLY: you cant be sick and give back. You need to eat well, sleep well, exercise
well. You can be your own superhero.
EMOTIONALLY: you cant give back if you are always arguing with wife, parents, etc.
You need to eliminate the people from your life who bring you down and surround
yourself with uplifting people who inspire you
MENTALLY: your idea muscle needs to be in superhuman shape if you want to give
back to society. This means coming up with creative ideas every single day, good or
bad.
SPIRITUALLY: this doesnt mean praying to an old man with a beard but it does mean
having a sense of surrender and gratitude. These are two different things. Surrender is
when you say, Thats it, Ive done all I can. I need help now. Where does the help
come from? Is there a god? Who knows. Maybe it just comes from a creative force
locked inside of you that is dying to come out and take over the world if you let it. But it
does come from somewhere. And gratitude: as soon as you wake up, list the 10 things
you are most grateful for.
Then, being fully in shape, you are able to walk through life and be a beacon to others.
People will be attracted to you and they wont know why. Opportunities will throw
themselves at your feet. And, by being a force of nature unto yourself, you will give
back to society without even directly knowing how you are doing it.

POKER
What did you learn from playing poker? @GiraffesCanSwim
At the time the question was asked I gave a 140 character answer. Something like,
you learn quickly that all your friends lie to you all the time in order to steal your
money. But Ive been thinking a little more about it.
First off, I spent 365 days straight playing poker in 1998-1999, including the night my
first kid was born http://bit.ly/g4a30s. Including my birthday and my anniversary.
Including Christmas and Easter and whatever Jewish holidays occurred during this time.
I used to play at the Mayfair Club on 24th Street and the Diamond Club on 20th Street,
both illegal clubs. The Mayfair would close at 4am and some stragglers would head over
to the Diamond, which never seemed to close. Ultimately both were closed down
permanently by Giuliani. I had a house in Atlantic City and would play there on the
weekends. Id go via helicopter Fridays at 5pm and fly back on Sunday
night. Occasionally I would go to Las Vegas and play. This was pre-Internet poker, tv
poker, and pre the big money that is in poker now.
The only time life had any color in it for me during this period was when I was sitting
around a table, chips in front of me, cards getting dealt, and guys with nothing else in
their lives making jokes back and forth while everyone tried to take everyone elses
money.
A few weeks ago, Claudia and I ran into the guy who had once owned the Diamond
Club. Oddly, we were at a party for the Wall Street Journal on some rooftop bar all the
way west in Manhattan. The Diamond Club guy wouldnt give us a straight answer for
why he was at the party. All he kept doing was talking to Claudia, pointing at me, and
saying this guy was the lowest down cheap hustler there was. Hes a born criminal.
Watch out for him.
I told her later he was kidding around. But the way he said it flattered me actually.
Poker is a charismatic game. People who are larger than life play poker and make their
living from playing games and hustling. Thats whats attractive about it. Thats part of
whats attractive about being an entrepreneur, or doing anything where you eat only
what you kill http://bit.ly/pz3Mzz and you survive in life only on your instincts.

I played because I was unhappy doing anything else. I played because I loved games. I
played because I thought everyone at the table was smart and witty and I liked the
repartee that was always darting back and forth. I wanted to be friends with these
people.I had just sold my company http://bit.ly/k0UeIb and I hadnt yet lost all my
money http://bit.ly/sQAIqb so it wasnt the money that brought me to the table. It was
the game. The charisma.The excitement. The way people adeptly played with the chips
in front of them, or threw their cards into the pot when they were out, the language of
motion, the gestures, the beautiful ballet of every movement in the game.
The only time I played after those 365 days was one time I went up to Murder Inc
Records about ten years later and all the same guys were playing there as if they had
never moved but the table had teleported over. Irv Gotti, therapper who owned Murder
Inc, won about $2,000 off of me in a big pot and I left after that and didnt play again. I
went to the game with Lenny Barshack who had just sold a poker sofware company.
On the way there Lenny told me how one month after he sold his company he had a
heart attack on a ski slope and had officially died.
Running a company is like being mugged. When you are mugged you get a jolt of
adrenalin that screams to your body: Fight! or Flight! But when you run a company its
like you are constantly being mugged but you still stare at the computer all day. So the
adrenalin builds up with nowhere to go. All the adrenalin does is keep you alive because
otherwise youd probably die from being mugged so much.
Once the stress is over (in Lennys case: when he sold his company) the adrenalin hits
you full force. So Lenny had a heart attack one month after he sold his company and
his heart went to zero for at least two minutes. Only a smart doctor brought him back
to life and less than a month later we were heading over to Murder Inc Records so I
could lose that final pot and then never play poker again. Poker sucks. Heres why:
A) Everyone at the table is your friend but they are all lying to you to steal your
money. I wanted to be around these grubby guys more than I wanted to be around my
wife and newborn. More than I wanted to be around real friends. More than I wanted
to be around my work colleagues or my family. I dont know why. Something was
wrong with me. All day long I read books about poker, and all night I would play.
I felt for the first time in years like I had a group of buddies. Like I was one of the
guys.

Heres the problem. We all were buddies but we spent the entire night lying and trying
to take money from each other. You could think, oh, its just a game. But I watched
some of my friends go broke and cry and borrow and beg and steal. Nobody liked
losing all of their money. I watched lawyers get disbarred trying to steal enough money
to play poker. I saw guys escape to Israel to avoid extradition when they lost their IRS
money to the poker table.
And nobody really cared about them. A guy would stop showing up and then he would
be forgotten. Nobody really cared about me. We were friends. Until we werent. And
that was that.
B) If you find yourself playing a game all day, even Angry Birds, or Poker, or Chess,
ask yourself: what might be wrong in my life? I was happy I had sold my business, but
maybe I wasnt happy working for a boss now. Or maybe I wasnt happy in marriage.
Or maybe I wasnt happy that all of my friends were work-related and I had lost every
other friend. An addiction is a symptom. Find the real genetic roots of what is going on.
By the way, not every game player is an addict. Some people make a good living at
these games. You have to judge for yourself whether you are a professional or an
addict. The professionals win money from the addicts who win money from the
amateurs.
C)
As for poker itself, and this goes for all sorts of ways to making money: you want
to sit immediately to the left of the dumbest, richest person at the table. He bets, then
you raise no matter what is in your hand. Then everyone else is out and its just you
and him. In the long run you get all his money. This applies to every business
endeavor.
D) Poker is a skill game pretending to be a chance game. Many things in life are like
that: sales, negotiating http://bit.ly/sndKHq, entrepreneurship, etc. All of these things
have the element of chance in them but the ones who are skillful will take all the money
from the ones who arent. The problem is: most people think they are good because its
hard to rank yourself and many people go into denial when they lose money. They tell
people, oh, I broke even when they lost money most of the night. How do you get
better at any skill game:
A)

Read as many books as you can written by players better than you

B)

Study hands and the analysis of those hands

C) Study and think about your mistakes. Dont regret your mistakes. Youll always
make mistakes. The better you are, the less mistakes you make. The only way to get
better is to thoroughly analyze your mistakes. So the more mistakes you have, the
more opportunities you have to get better. Of course, this applies to everything you do
in life.
D)

Talk to people smarter than you. Try to learn from them anything you can.

E)
Conspiracy theory. If you have a bad hand and someone raises you and someone
then raises him, youre going to most likely need luck to win. Back out and try again
later. Theres a theory in programming chess computers that applies to other areas of
life, including this one. Its called conspiracy theory. If too many things have to
happen in order to bring about the situation you want, then back out of it and try again
later.
For instance, if you are in love with a girl but she has three kids, is unhappily married,
and lives 5000 miles away, then at least three things have to conspire simultaneously
for you to ever end up with that girl. In poker, if you are facing two potential hands
that are better than yours, plus you have to wait for two more rounds of betting to
occur (where you can lose more money), and you are waiting for very specific cards
that are unlikely to arrive, then too many things have to conspire to make the hand
work. For every situation you want, determine your conspiracy number where you
back down if that number of items has to conspire together. A conspiracy number of
three in most things is enough for me to back down.
F)
Be the Bank. I was once in Atlantic City and I was playing at a table with one of
the best players I knew, Joe. Another guy at the table needed chips and Joe said, Ill
sell you some of my chips. So the guy handed over money and Joe sold him some of
his chips (an activity that is illegal in Atlantic City but it was 4 in the morning and
nobody cared.) I asked Joe later why he did that. Joe said, Always be the bank. If
youre the source of everything at the table then it makes it harder for them to bet
against you. This is a weird version of Give and You Shall Receive
http://bit.ly/fi1mHC but it works.
In September, 1999, one year to the day after I started playing every day, I stopped. I
started another company http://bit.ly/g5uNNz instead and lost millions at it. Perhaps
then I realized that all of life is a game of high stakes poker. And on every hand you
risk losing everything youve ever worked hard for. Or maybe the final thing I learned is

that its all just a game. And eventually you can just stop playing. A first kiss is better
than winning any hand.

CHESS
Who was better, Fischer or Kasparov? @StockSage1
At his peak, Fischer was better relative to his competitors than Kasparov ever was.
However, if you paired them at their respective peaks (using a time machine: then
Kasparov was better). Why?
A)

Training techniques improved

B) Computers enabled Kasparov to do quicker and more extensive research on any

position
C) Kasparov was never mentally ill so he was able to pursue studies and play in
tournaments for 25 straight years. Fischer maybe had 10 years of study.
D) Kasparov was already recognized as a young talent at the age of 9. Fischer had to
work harder to get his talent out. Kasparov also had better trainers at a young age.
Fischer had none.

DRUGS
Mood-altering drugs (a la depression meds, etc.) yay or nay? If
nay then what? @cseidholz
Several issues: One is that clinical depression is a real physical disease and does require
drugs. However, there is a severe problem.
Depression is a very loose, umbrella term. Does it mean anxiety? Or eating
disorder? Or post-traumatic stress syndrome? Or ADD, ADHD, traditional clinical
depression, etc.
And for each one of these things (and a dozen more) a different drug works and the
rest of the drugs dont work and can, in fact, make you worse. For instance, some antidepressants can make you feel suicidal if you are not technically depressed.
On average it takes eight years for a depressed patient to discover which drug works
for them. There have been various tests that have shown this.
Im biased on this topic because Im invested in a company that solves this problem
(so have learned a lot of the problems in the industry), CNS Response. They have
10,000 EEGs in a database. Each of the 10,000 is of a patient who was successfully
diagnosed and treated.
Then, with a new patient, they match the new patients EEG with the database to
determine the right treatment. Its remarkably effective according to statistical tests
done.

THE SELF HELP INDUSTRY

What is the most comical about the self-help industry?
@steveroh
I think of the self-help industry much how I think of the media industry. Mildly
informative if you can pluck out the gems, but mostly dangerous. Many of these socalled gurus need to make a living and so they pluck away at the fear and greed strings
on the emotional guitars of their willing adherents.
Many of these people have never lost a home, lost a business, lost a wife, lost a family,
and suffered real hardship but then claim the label of coach or guru and have at it.
Then ten years later we hear about the sex scandals, the financial scandals, the coverups, the killings, the real secrets in The Secret.
I wish people would be honest. Instead of saying this is how to be perfect I wish
these people would start from the premise, hey, Im striving also. Im trying to figure it
out. Heres whats worked for me. Heres what hasnt worked for me. And, by the way,
heres the screwed up crap Im dealing with today. I hope I survive also.
Just be honest. Is it really that hard in every industry to be honest? Particularly an
industry that, first and foremost, about honesty? (Just like the finance industry should
be but isnt).

Any thoughts on Eckhart Tolle? @EricRomer

Eckhart Tolle wrote the best seller ThePower of Now and was fortunate to spend
some couch time with Oprah Winfrey to really propel his message to the masses. When
he first wrote the book, he printed up 3000 copies and basically went door to door at all
the bookstores and handed them out. It took him years to find success, which I truly
appreciate. I also think much of the advice in The Power of Now is interesting to read.
Its a watered down version (he does not admit this) of the Hindu philosophy
AdvaitaVenta (best exemplified by a teacher from 100 years ago, RamanaMaharshi) but
Tolle does a good job translating that into every day language and I agree with his
approach of not mentioning the roots of his philosophy.

The one thing I think limits Tolle is that he hasnt raised a family, or failed at a business
or a career, or has shared his own stories of sadness, depression, and pain. I think that
ultimately limits his message. Many of have real careers that we are stressed about,
family that drives us crazy, businesses that we fail at.
Many of us need to get off the floor after those failures and know that the hand thats
reaching out to us comes from someone who has been there before.

WRITING
How to get over Writers Block? - @markmccarthyUK
COFFEE. Im just being honest. Who knows if coffee is good or bad for you. But I start
writing on my third cup of coffee for the day. Since its an addiction, at some point I will
need four, or maybe five, cups to get me started. Somehow coffee gets my brain overstimulated and ideas start to happen and then I write them down.
READING. I always read before I write. This morning, for instance, I read some William
Vollmann (an essay he wrote about writing), some Bukowski, some Miranda July (she
has the breathless love me way about her), Michael Hemmingson (who was writing
about William Vollmann), and a little of my all-time favorite author me. When Im
reading I often get ideas about what to write. No idea is totally new. So if a writer
experienced something Ive experienced or makes me think of something Ive
experienced, I can repackage it and spread the love in my own, hopefully unique, way.
As an example, the other day I was reading Tim OBriens short story, What We
Carried about the physical items he and his fellow soldiers carried into the jungles of
Vietnam and how they also carried emotional and mental baggage.
Well, for me, going into NYC, working to support my family, trying to struggle against
the competitive fire of everyone else trying to take money with their grubby fat hands
during the course of my day, reminds me of that. So I wrote about what I carry during
my day. Did I copy him? Of course, but its also my truth and not his.
SAME TIME EVERY DAY. If I wake up at 4:30, and done with my reading and coffee by
6, Im sitting in front of the computer trying to write. Your brain is your slave, not your
master. So if I tell the brain every day that at six AM he has to jump through hoops and
ride an elephant than he better do so. (Or maybe he is a she. Can a man have a
female brain? Sometimes I think I do.)
START IN THE MIDDLE. This is the best technique on the list and will always work If
you have a topic already. The other day I was writing one of those 7 Things I Learned
from X sorts of posts. I was staring at a blank screen. I couldnt figure out the intro.
So I said to myself, how about I just start with the list? I then wrote: 1) Honesty
and then I couldnt think of what to say underneath honesty so I went to #2, then #3,

etc. Now I had a list of seven things but no descriptions/reasons for each item and NO
intro and NO conclusion. But I also had NO PROBLEM because the content was done.
So I just filled in the blanks like a game of Mad Libs.
START WITH THE BLOOD. This only applies if you have a topic. I wrote a few months
ago 5 things I learned from Isaac Asimov. Or maybe 10 things. I forget. But when I
think about Asimov and me the first line that stands out is, The first time the police
were ever called to get me was when I was 15. From there I have a story and will lead
into the 5 things, particularly when I follow D above.
DONT EVER TALK ABOUT WHAT YOURE GOING TO WRITE. When a piece of writing is
inside of you its like a baby thats growing. The baby is feeding off of your vitality, your
brain, your emotional strength, and over time it grows. If you talk about it, then youve
given birth. Ive given birth to more dead babies than I can count. Give birth on the
written page first. Then you can talk about her as she matures.
INSPIRATION. Sometimes I get hard-core writers block. I did my reading, my coffee,
my analysis of my big past failures, etc. and I cant figure out something to write. I do
several things then to look for inspiration:
I look around my room: This inspired The Tooth, and also The Ugliest Painting in the
World, and also Is Burton Silverman Dead Yet.
I go to some websites that always have intriguing photos that might inspire
me:Boingboing.net, Brainpickings.org., thebrowser.com, extragoodshit.phlat.net
(warning: explicit), etc. For instance, 7 Things I Learned from Louis Armstrong came
from the first item on the list above.
My own material. I look back to stories Ive written and see if theres a way I can slice it
up further. For instance, Ive written about starting a company in the 90s called Reset.
But I never wrote about selling it so here I wrote about that.
The most embarrassing things. I had hard-core writers block one weekend. So I picked
the most embarrassing stuff you can possibly write about and just spewed it out in a
post called, appropriately, Writers Block.
MAKE YOURSELF THE BAD GUY. If Im writing about the love of my life I can write I
broke up with her with a text message to her phone. Or you are writing about how to
make money you can start with, The worst thing I ever did was steal money from my

parents. Then that leads to: why you stole, how much you stole, what you did with the
money, how you found a more honest way to make money, and what those 7 ways of
making money are. Voila! A post!
HONESTY CHECK. Make sure youre not trying to protect yourself. Protecting others is
important. Do No Harm. But if youre going to tell a story, it doesnt have to make you
the hero. For instance one of my more popular posts was How I Screwed Yasser Arafat
Out of $2 million. Right off I said I needed $100 million. Nobody needs $100 million.
Then I described what I would do with $100 million, everything I did to try and get that
hundred million, and ultimately what Yasser Arafat had to do with it. The story told
itself. But I was arrogant, foolish, a bad guy, and at least at that time, had no idea what
I was doing. If I tried to protect myself in the writing then there wouldve been no
story. So always do an honesty check. Are you saying something because its true or
because you are trying to protect yourself?
SOLVE A PROBLEM. If I have a problem like, Im angry then I have at least two
delicious courses that will make a full meal. 1) What am I angry about? 2) How I deal
with the anger. This not only solves my problem but I think gives the world a little
advice on how to deal with anger. So how do you do this? Look inside your stomach.
Whats making you feel a little sick or inspired today? Your job?The prospect of being
an entrepreneur? Jealousy of Larry Page? It can be good or bad. But it has to be inside
of you so you can get it out, analyze it, kill it, destroy the beast, and solve the problem.
The above ten techniques have basically produced every piece of writing Ive done this
year plus five books. Now my only problem is I promised Claudia I would cook fried
chicken for lunch and I have no idea what to do. I might fake it by going to a
restaurant while she is napping and getting fried chicken from them and pretending
afterwards that I cleaned the whole kitchen. Sometimes I get away with that.

Where do you see yourself in 5 years? @ClarkCovington

I honestly dont know. I need help figuring that out. I write every day and post on my
blog about 3-4 times a week. I enjoy it. Im also in a bunch of investments, private and
public.
Id like to figure out the next steps with the blog, if there is one. Ive rejected all

advertising (I think it would cheapen the blog right now). I dont know what to do. But
if anyone has ideas what else I should be doing Id be happy to hear them.

How do you find the time to write and exercise?

@GlobalMacroZen
The only answer is wake up earlier. We waste so much time during the day. For
instance, checking email is a 2-3 minute adventure. Many people check email on their
phones or computers at least once an hour. Thats 32 minutes a day. About 10,000
minutes a year. Over a 40 year period thats 400,000 minutes or 277 days checking
emails.
Other time wasters that can store up minutes in your day: watching dumb primetime
TV. Going out drinking with friends (have coffee with your friends mid-day). And there
are a million other time wasters that can be read about in any number of productivity
books. What do you do with all this extra time? Easy. Go to sleep an hour earlier. Wake
up an hour earlier, refreshed (no prime time junk in your brain).
This seems like not a big issue in your 20s and 30s. But when you get older you realize
that a minute of anger, a minute of stress, a minute of junk is 60 seconds that you
couldve been happy.
If you dont exercise, if you dont get the creative muscles going and stay healthy, then
when you are older all of that junk adds up: youll be less happy, less healthy, quality of
life will be down.

@GlobalMacroZen then said: my schedule wont allow that.

Is that what you are going to say on your deathbed?

Is it possible that a small improvement can be too small? No.

Improvements compound exponentially and add up to great
success over time.
Someone just wrote me, for instance, and said they want to write a novel (they have
the idea) but dont know how.

The answer is really simple: first practice staring at a blank screen for 20 minutes a
day. Then start writing 500 words a day.
A novel is 60,000 words.
500 words a day is 180,000 words in one year (and that assumes breaks for 5
holidays). 500 words is only 2-3 paragraphs. So you can write 3 novels in one year. Or
one good, highly edited novel. And thats if you limit yourself to 500 words.
With practice youll go up to 1,000 words, 2,000 words, etc. Any small improvement
(staring at a blank screen to get used to the idea of writing) will add up to success
beyond belief (who would think you can do 3 novels in a year so easily?)

What are the most important factors in succeeding in financial

journalism? @dyer440
I can write a book on this one topic. So heres my top 8 points on succeeding financial
journalism:
SCOOPS ARE NO LONGER IMPORTANT. It used to be if you had a scoop you had at
least a 24 hour lead on all the other news sources so scoops actually meant your
circulation went up and business improved. Now, because of the Internet, any scoop
has a 1 second lead at most on its competitors. So chasing scoops is a waste of time.
HELP PEOPLE UNDERSTAND COMPLEX ISSUES. Break it down in easy to understand
language. Why did Italy cause such a panic three days ago and then manage to borrow
$150 billion no problem the next day. Its because the headlines are just trying to scare
people. Fear has replaced scoops to drive circulation. Then it becomes a race to the
bottom, who can scare people the most.
MY PERSONAL RULES in 9 years of writing for financial sites (and creating a site with
millions of users, Stockpickr.com, which sold to thestreet.com in 2007):
Always create value. Can people use your article to have a better understanding of
the markets
Provide analysis and proof. Dont just give a random rant. Give real numbers to

back things up.

Be honest. If youre wrong, youre wrong. But dont just cave in to whatever the
current panic trends are.
BUILD YOUR NETWORK. Everyones got a story. As your network of contacts grow, the
value of it grows exponentially. The network will be your source of interesting stories.
POSITIVE AND OPTIMISTIC, because in the long run (like for the past 200 years) you
will be right.
TELL A STORY. Dont just give numbers. Tell a story of where the world will be five
years from now and how we will get there, starting with the events happening today.
As the story developes into the real world, you will have the fuel for more and more
stories/articles.
BE A LITTLE VOYEURISTIC. Everyone wants to know about their heroes. Who are your
heroes. Why are they your heroes. What are their secret origins? Write about them
and follow their stories. Many journalists have made a living off of just Warren Buffett.
DONT TRASH ANYONE. A lot of well-known writers disagree with this. They lose in the
long run. And the long run is all I try to care about.
Note: I stole #1 from a discussion with Kevin Ryan, who is one of the founders of
Doubleclick, Gilt, and financial media site, Businessinsider.com.

How can a humor writer bleed? @idiotlaureate

The only thing humor writers do as bleed. Bleeding is about sharing a situation that we
can all relate to: usually disgusting, embarassing, and humiliating, and finding the truth
in it. Some examples from some of the funniest people around:
Sarah Silvermans book: The bedwetter: Stories of Courage, Redemption, and
Pee (right in the title)
Paul Feigs book: Superstud: Or how I Became a 24 Year Old Virgin (Feig is director
and writer of the show Freaks and Geeks and has directed many funny movies)

Comedian Mike Birbiglias book: Sleepwalk with me: and other painfully true stories
David Cross (Arrested Development, Mr. Show)s book: I Drink for a Reason
JIm Norton (super comedian): Happy Endings: Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilc
Artie Lange: Too Fat to Fish
And so on (I also recommend Ellen Degeneress three books and Judd Apatows
collection of stories he found funny).

Starting out as a writer, how much time should I budget daily to

reasonably get going? @Bmp135
The most important thing is consistency. Every day. Seven days a week. Writing is like
a muscle. You start to get writers block more frequently when the muscle atrophies.
Ive been writing consistently since 2002. Before that I wrote consistently from 19911995.
Nothing good, mind you. Just writing. But, Ive also read a lot of books on writing by
well-known and successful writers. Heres the general consensus that Ive experienced
myself and all the writers I have read seemed to have lived by:
Three to five hours a day, every day.
Walter Mosely (one of my favorite mystery writers) has written that if you just write 500
words a day (three paragraphs) then in 100 days you have 50,000 words. Which is a
roughly the length of a small but publishable novel. So you can write 3.5 novels a year.
Or write one really really good one that youve rewritten quite a bit. Try it.
One of my new years resolutions is to try it.

What is your writing schedule?

I try to do this every day: Wake up at 4:30am. Coffee. 2 hours of reading. What do I
read? I try to read strong autobiographical fiction.

That sort of sounds like an oxymoron: autobiographical fiction. But authors like
Bukowski, Raymond Carver, William Vollmann, Miranda July, Mary Gaitskill, have strong
literary voices precisely because they write about what they know best: themselves.
They dive deep and even if they tweak their own biographies enough to produce fiction,
its often the fiction that is heavily based on truth and their own lives that comes out
the best. Jonathan Ames, Michael Hemmingson, Donald Ray Pollock, Don Carpenter,
John Fante, Celine, are also in this category. I like to get my mind buzzing with their
voices to get inspiration.
Then I write for 2-4 hours, then rewrite.
When Im writing, I have to search the feelings in my body to see what s bothering me.
If something pops up, I immediately start writing whats bothering me so much that my
body hurts to think about it. Then I keep going and see where it takes me. [See, "33
Unusual Ways to Become a Better Writer" http://bit.ly/gDzHGb]
I also find that if I dont stick to this routine then I usually cant write for the day. Its
the same time every day. And if I miss a day, it probably takes me two days to get back
into the routine. I was busy this week in a lot of early meetings. It totally threw me off.
Now Im back!

Is the hardest part of writing a novel getting started? @MichaelComeau

I like Walter Mosleys recent book on How to Write a Novel. Its a short book because
his main advice can be summarized in one line: Write 500 words a day. A novel is about
60,000 words. So in 120 days (4 months) you have your first draft write. 500 words is
only about three or four paragraphs.
Something else I read on a blog: a woman who writes (and publishes) many novels
(she writes serials about, I think, vampires) explains how she writes 15,000 (!!) words a
day. She outlines heavily beforehand. And then she just goes for it. She says she went
from 1000 words a day to 15,000 words a day using this technique.
Then, both writers say this is only for first draft. And then you have to rewrite. But
whatever, the first draft seems hardest to me.

BLOGGING
Am I crazy to give away free plumbing advice on my blog? Will
that sink my company? @OconomowocPlumb
It will make your company a huge success.
Ive made a good amount of money on five different occasions. (Ive also lost a good
amount of money on at least 15). But the one thing in common on all five occasions is
that I gave away free advice.
In my first company I sold, Reset, Inc. our job was to make websites for companies.
The way I landed almost every customer was by spending time with them and giving
them complete free advice about how they could improve their website. On some
occasions I even recommended competitors. On other occasions I never got the client.
They took my advice and did it themselves. Heck, we lost our biggest client that way at
one point (until they had to come back for more free advice).
Lets not forget: the only thing Google ever does is give out free advice. You can say to
Google, I have Hepatitis and Google will say, I cant help you but here are ten of my
competitors (other websites) who can help you.
Then when you have another problem who do you go back to? The source of the fount
of free advice: Google.
The Bible says, Ask and You Shall Receive. There are two parties there: the person
asking, and the person being asked (who then does the giving). The person being
asked (in the Bible) is God. Id rather be in the position of the person being asked then
the person asking.
When you emulate the properties of the person/God being asked then your business
will grow faster than you can even handle it (as happened with Google when their free
advice became the best on the planet).
So Give and you Receive http://bit.ly/fi1mHC should be the rule to live by. In fact, its
the title of one of my favorite posts Ive written.

How can I get people to my blog? @Rita_Colbert

I would suggest:
A)

Keep reading quality writing so you can improve the quality in your blogs.

B)
Tell more honest stories in your blog. Bleed so we can see what you are really
made of. Dont just say 10 tips to success. Share an intimacy so we can be intimate.
C)

Guest post on other blogs and link back to your blog.

Storytelling has worked for 5000 years. Its not going to stop now just because we have
blogs and tweets. Rita is definitely doing some good storytelling.

How do I pick a blog name? @rbinmn

Use your own name. Its the best way to spread the word about what you are, who you
are about, and what you stand for. Look at Huffington Post. The most successful blog
ever (whether one likes it or not- it started as a blog) was built on the back of one
persons name. Someone should make a libertarian version of the Huffington Post
although lewrockwell.com is doing a good job.

Is there one simple. common feature, one element you aim to

achieve in every blog post? @rajlikes
In every post, try to do these three things:
A) Bleed. Sharing intimacy is a way to connect with people. Share an intimacy you
are scared to share. That is bleeding.
B) Tell a story. If your post is just top 10 ways to be a weightlifter then nobody
cares. You have to tell your personal story of how you went from a 98 lb weakling to a
Charles Atlas weightlifter. Remember those ads in the back of comic books? In just a
panel or two you go the story. The 98 lb weakling was at the beach with his girl. He got
sand kicked in his face. He got angry, he did the Charles Atlas method, and now hes
ripped and shredded like Mr. Universe.

C) Deliver value. Since I started writing I make sure I deliver value in each post. Has
to be value you cant find anywhere else. Theres seven billion blogs and articles posted
every day. How does your feeble words stand out amongst all that. You have to deliver
huge value. See, 33 Unusual Ways to Be a Better Writer http://bit.ly/gDzHGb.

Thoughts on the anti-blog movement of authors using email

services like MailChimp? Direct to the inbox as they like to say
@Unpacktherat
TV didnt replace movies. Movies didnt replace radio. Radio didnt replace reading.
Photography didnt replace painting.
People chose the medium they want to create in. The key is to have something to say.
Then figure out the medium you want to use to say it. I like blogging because, for me,
it seems like hard work to build out an email list when I dont feel I need to. Anyone
can just come to my blog and read what I have to say plus I can have other links on
there to other posts that I think are relevant. I like my posts to be 3 dimensional and
link all around.
But some people like email lists. Its more direct. I would say the style is a bit different.
So it just depends what medium you want to be a creator in, an artist in.
The key, again, is to have something to say. Then create.

What should I blog about? I change my interests every day.

@tfrojd
Dont give yourself anymore excuses to not just sit down and create! Creation takes
practice and time. So start now whether you have consistent ideas or not.
Set up a blog: My New Interest
Every day or week post on it. Completely tell me about your new interest:
A)

Why are you interested in this new thing?

B)

Why did you lose interest in the old thing?

C)

What connections are there between the new and the old (or older?)

D) And tell me at least one new thing about your new interest that I could not have
read anywhere else.
Eventually youll start to see themes arise across your interests. Those themes will
intermingle. Something cohesive will come out. For a brief time, youll be a blogger,
then an artist. Then you will create something new out of the intermingling and mating
of all of these interests.

SELF-PUBLISHING
Do authors need to know about marketing? @ReadHeavily
A friend of mine was visiting a publisher who had published a book of mine. Now they
wanted to publish my friends book. She asked them specifically, what marketing did
you do for James Altuchers book?
They answered, in all sincerity: we got him a review in the Financial Times, a segment
on CNBC, and an excerpt in thestreet.com.
Heres the facts:
A)

I had a column in the Financial Times! I wrote my own review as a joke.

B)
I had a regular weekly segment on CNBC. I used one of those segments to
promote my own book.
C)
I wrote 3 columns a day at the time for thestreet.com. I used one of those
columns to do an excerpt and nobody complained.
So thats the marketing that publisher did for me.
Heres the truth about book publishing now: there are only two characters in this grand
production: the writer and the readers. Everyone else in the middle: booksellers,
agents, editors, packagers, distributors, marketers, etc is in massive upheaval and
transition and they are seldom willing to admit it. Book publishers dont provide
anything.
Heres my Why and How I Self-Publish http://bit.ly/kKRy6d.
If I were a book publisher I would transform myself instantly in the following ways:
A) Reduce the lag time from book acceptance to publication from one year to one
month. Theres no such thing as a catalog now. Just get the book on Amazon and

bn.com and if the book does well the small bookstores will start calling.
B) Become digital marketing agencies. Learn how to use social media to really start
the discussion on books. Zero book publishers have done this correctly although they
think they have with outdated email lists that generate zero sales.
And as an author, the main thing I can suggest is: read my link above about selfpublishing but also take control of your own marketing:
A)

Book public speaking engagements where you give your book away for free.

B) Syndicate blog columns related to your book content on popular sites related to
your content
C) Engage with twitter, Facebook, Google+ to have an active discussion (throughout
your life) about how your books content is important to you. If you believe in what you
are saying this is not marketing but honesty and sincerity.
The sincere voices will always rise to the top. Oh, and also Snooki will rise to the top.

Where will e-books be 5 years from now? @eradke

I was at a dinner sitting next to Binky Urban (the most successful literary agent in
history) and Tina Brown, publisher of Newsweek and The Daily Beast, among other
things. I asked them both about the future of publishing.
Urban said, Publishing is doing better than ever. Ive seen more 7 digit advances for
first time novelists than ever before in the past six months.
Tina Brown said, Book publishing is dead. Its all e-books.
I think they are both right.
But I know my own behavior:
Behavior #1: I go to a bookstore, pick out all the books that look interesting to me, and
then sit down on a chair right there in the book store and buy them on my kindle app
on my i-pad. Amazon benefits and not the bookstore. Maybe this is not fair but this is

how I do it.
Behavior #2: I no longer publish with traditional publishers. I self-publish in both kindle
and e-book. And most of the sales (I can see all the numbers) come from the cheaper
kindle version.
This is related to another question asked me but Im self-publishing another book within
the next four weeks: I Was Blind but Now I See about how to break down the myths
that we are bombarded with every day so that we can find success and happiness. Im
going to use the same technique to self-publish and probably launch the book by giving
it out for Thats my behavior. But before long everyone will be free at Barry Ritholzs Big
Picture conference where I am speaking.
Heres the key:
- Write 500 words a day on the topic you are most passionate about, on your business,
on whatever you want.
- Within 100 days youll be ready to self-publish
- Self-publish
- Now your book is your business cards. When everyone else is handing out flimsy little
cards with email addresses youll be handing out a book. For better or worse, youll
stand out. And thats what you want.

What would you do if you meet Stephen Covey down a dark alley?
@IndustryKeyword
Haha. I assume this was asked because for the past three weeks Coveys book, The
Seven Habits of Effective People and my book I Was Blind But Now I See
http://amzn.to/rbiL9r have #1 and #2 in Amazons Kindle store for motivation.
The only big difference is: his book was published 20 years ago and hes still #1.
Stephen, wont you let anyone else have a chance? To be fair, I was #1 for one whole
day before he recaptured the throne.
And so my answer is I would congratulate him. He clearly had a message that
resonates with time. I can only hope to be eventually so lucky as to help as many
people as he has helped.
I did write a post about his #1 habit http://bit.ly/tm9Akl and my experience with it. I

view all the rest of the habits he has as corollaries of the first one.
Also, my book isnt so much about effectiveness but happiness how you can tear
away the shades that keep the room dark, so the light can flow in.

Do you ever struggle to simplify and structure complex ideas

when writing books? What steps do you go thru? @iAspin
Yes, every single thing I write. In my last book, most of my ideas in the second half
come from texts Ive read that were written over 2000 years ago. I totally plagiarize
them. But they are texts that have withstood the test of time and I know, when written
with modern examples and modern language, that they will still resonate and people
will still find Truth in how they can apply these principles in their own lives.
But if I were to just cut and paste them, they wouldnt be useful at all. So I run them
through the filter of whats happened to me in my own life and how Ive used these
principles and it becomes much more accessible.

How do you make money selling an eBook while giving it away at

the same time for free with a special offer? @CLAcevedo222
You cant make money selling books. Well, some can. JK Rowling can. The
Freakonomics guys can http://bit.ly/gbWbE1.
But thats one in a million. Literally those are the statistics. So heres why you write
books (if money is your motive):
A) Everyone acknowledges that a book requires expertise and hard work. That
expertise can win customers.
B)

Consulting engagements

C)

Speaking engagements

D) More people see your name which can lead to more networking. Networking can
bring you down a maze of opportunities totally different from where you started but
much more lucrative. Tim Ferris, the author of the 4 Hour Body has Twitter shares,

for instance. How did that happen? Because he knew how to make money off of his
books!
E) Or, if you are prolific, you can write ten books. You can write 100 books. You can
write 467 books! See, 5 things I learned from Isaac Asimov http://bit.ly/tyiEXj.
So, go write a book! See also, Why and How to Self-Publish a Book
http://bit.ly/kKRy6d)

Do 1 star reviews on Amazon affect your writing? And would you

rather get a 1 star review or a 3 star review? @BenNesvig
Ben has just self-published an excellent book http://amzn.to/yO2jbB. Its really funny.
The only problem is: he only has five star reviews. Whats so bad about that? I, for
instance, hate when I have a one star review. It kills me. It makes me question my
entire existence. Someone actually read my book and thought so poorly of it they took
the time and effort to log onto Amazon and spend a precious few minutes trashing my
whole life in view of anyone. But thats what sells books. When people are arguing,
thats controversy. Controversy sells. The #1 book on the Kindle has 81 1 star reviews
(and 3000 5 star reviews). But the top-rated Kindle book, with 697 five star reviews
and zero reviews of any other sort, is ranked down at #10,000 in the kindle store. So
thank your one star-reviewers. They will drive more sales than your five star reviewers.
A few months ago I read the excellent short story colletion Knockemstiff by Donald
Ray Pollock. Afterwards, I read the reviews. Some were one star reviews and when I
read why it showed they had totally missed the point of the book. But I wrote Pollock to
cheer him up and told him the one star reviews were almost better advertisements than
the five star reviews. All the people offended by the sex and violence. Hell! Im a
buyer when I see that.

Is it possible for you to make a living from your self-published

books?@ailon
Yes and no. There are all these literary-fab stories of some 17 year old writing zombie
novellas making $1 million a year. Thats great if you can do it. It requires persistent
writing, blogging, reaching out to audience, being in a hot area at the right time, etc.
But, most areas are not like that. Most people are not like that.

The way to make make a living money from self-published books is to treat the book
like an enhanced business card. You write it, you parlay it into expertise validation,
which gets you consulting and speaking gigs.
And you can write more books. You get to pick yourself instead of having some random
publisher pick you, edit you, and delay your book coming out for a year where you end
up making the same amount of money anyway. I did four books last year. My selfpublished books made me more money.

IS IT TOO LATE?
Is it too late to start all over at 47 and still make it big?
@tombakalis
The answer is, of course not. There are so many examples.
I can start off with this one I wrote about. He started his career in his mid 40s and
became a billionaire.
But there are many other examples:
A) Laura Ingalls Wilder (author of Little Women) published her first novel at age 65
B) Colonel Sanders (who was only an honorary colonel) started his first KFC at age
65. Sold it in 1964 for $2 million when there were 900 of them.
C) Tim Zagat started Zagats at the age of 51.
D) Raymond Chandlers first novel came out at 51.
E) Rodney Dangerfield was a used-car salesman well into his 40s before switching to
comedy
F) Gandhis political career started at age 61
G) Frank Mccort wrote his first novel in his 60s.
And so on.
Focus on having high quality of life into old age. You have to plant those seeds now.
Then todays 50 is yesterdays 25.
Take for eample this post I wrote other day about a guy who started his career over at
the age of 48 and went on to be an international success:
I asked Rodney Dangerfield what was the craziest thing he ever saw at three in the
morning. Without skipping a beat he said, Her husband came home!
We talked some more. He was more somber than I thought he would be. He told me

how he was an aluminum siding salesman and then when he was in his mid 40s he got
sick of it and he was depressed. He had a mid-life crisis. He decided to get back into
comedy (he had utterly failed at it in his 20s). When he was 48 he started the comedy
club Dangerfields which became the biggest comedy club in NYC for some time. From
aluminum siding salesman to comedy impresario at the age of 48. He had all the best
comedians perform there. Im the one who first had Jim Carrey perform! he told me
We talked some more but I forget the conversation. I remember being obsessed with
one thing, telling him how inspirational it was that he made a change so late in life (I
was 28 at the time and even then wondering how it can be possible to switch careers)
and totally changed the direction of his life, career, everything. He seemed proud of this
and would tell more stories of the change.
Afterwards, I was standing on the sidewalk watching him walk to his car. George Carlin,
who I had to interview next, leaned over, pointed at Dangerfield, and said, that guy is
totally high right now. Of course Im name dropping. Ill tell you one more thing about
George Carlin. One time I went to see him perform at Radio City Music Hall for an HBO
special. I took a date. She casually mentioned some guy she was friends with.
Being hopelessly insecure, I asked her if she liked him. She got a disgusted look on
her face and said, how can you even ask me that? The lights went down then, the
show was starting. And then for the rest of the show I didnt pay any attention and I
was upset that I had blown it with her. I don't think I laughed once at anything George
Carlin was saying.
Then later, people who watched it on TV kept saying they saw me in the audience.
Apparently a friend of mine was doing all the camera work and he told me, as a joke to
me, he kept going right in close on my face for audience reactions. And since I was
upset the entire time the reactions were not good.
Oh, one more thing. My friend doing the camera work once told me, I have a pickup
line that always works but you can never tell anyone.
I said, ok, no problem. I promise I will never use it or mention it to anyone.
We were in his office. He had hours and hours of videotape of Ultimate Fighting
Championships so that was on in the background. Ultimate Fighting usually involved
one guy pinning another guy down very quickly so you couldnt see what was
happening as the guy on top broke one finger at a time of the guy on the bottom even

after the guy had already pounded the floor, signaling stop.
I have another story where I had breakfast with the guy who ran the Ultimate Fighting
Championships ( the girl who I went to the George Carlin event with introduced us) but
thats for another time.
So tell me the pickup line, I said.
It only works on girls from Canada, he said. But if a girl says Im from Canada, you
ask, Really? What street?"
At a talk I gave in Canada once I used that line and they all sort of groaned. Dont use
that if you are actually IN Canada.
Back to Rodney Dangerfield. I cant think of a single movie or appearance of his I didnt
like. Caddyshack, when it came out with Dangerfield, Chevy Chase, and Bill Murray, was
the funniest move I had ever seen at the time. Back to School was hilarious. And so
on.
I liked how his humor was so instant and spontaneous. How he could immediately look
and act completely crazy. His humor was not only physical but he had a catch phrase
that seemed particular to him while he said it but was something we all instantly relate
to, I get no respect. This ultimate self-deprecation catapulted his career for decades.
But he was also an inspiration. That you can go from being an aluminum siding
salesman in your 40s and you can be, frankly, hideously ugly and look like nothing is
going your way (I get no respect comes from experience) and then starting from
scratch become one of the biggest comedians and box office stars ever is inspiring to
me.
Theres lots of things that I wanted to do in my twenties that I never succeeded in.
Writing a novel, for instance. I wrote four or five (depending on how you define
novel) and sent them around to dozens of agents and publishers and got rejected
everywhere. I wrote a comic book script for the DC character Delirium and never got
a response. I was inspired by all of Alan Moores and Neil Gaimans comic books and
read every comic I could but it wasnt enough. I wanted to be a PhD in Computer
Science but was thrown out. I wrote a spec script for The Larry Sanders Show. But
nothing. I tried shooting two documentaries. I even had as a New Years resolution last
year to try standup comedy but its hard when you go to sleep by 8pm every night.

But anything can change at any time. A few years ago I was having coffee with a friend
of mine whose book was being published the very next day. He was depressed. Sales
are going to suck, he said. This is it for me. It was his third or fourth book and the
last one had not sold well.
No way, I said, this will be a bestseller.
But I was just being encouraging. His life changed overnight (the book was
Freakonomics) and his career is still catapulting upwards in ways that Im sure are still
surprising to him when he wakes up in the morning.
Every day we wake up a new person. We can forget that and too easily reattach to our
past: Im too old. Im too ugly. I didnt get the right education. I dont live in the right
city. I dont have the right contacts. I dont have any skills. I dont know how to even
get started. And so on. We give ourselves excuses so we can continue our life of
depressive misery.
Rodney Dangerfield was clinically depressed all his life. He took medication (often selfmedicated) for depression every day for the last 60 years of his life. He had every
excuse to never make any changes, including the all-encompassing one, I get no
respect.
Today Im going to download Caddyshack, his first big hit. He was not supposed to be
such a major character in it. But he steals every scene. I havent watched the movie in
maybe 20 years. But it made me laugh. Every day I want to leave my life open for
changes. I want to stay one step ahead of the excuses that try to drag me back down
into hell. But today I want to laugh.

RETIREMENT
How should one choose when to retire and where to live?
@Elyiggy
The simple answer is: never retire. People die within two years of retiring on average.
So unless you want to die, why retire. But transformation is another story. After
spending 45 years as a janitor at the pencil factory it might be time to try something
new. Presumably the entire world is open to you. Your kids are grown up. You might
have some savings, etc.
The key is personal freedom. Being able to do what you want, when you want to.
Assuming your health needs dont require you to be in one specific place, pick a
location where cost of living is incredibly low and live out your life doing your fantasy
work. Whats your fantasy work? For me it might be scripting comic books. It might be
doing these Twitter Q&As. I can do these from anywhere. Maybe when I retire Ill move
to India where I can live for about $500 a month at most.
Or a friend of mine just told me about rental prices in Savannah, Georgia, which he
said, is the most beautiful place in the country. And rents and cost of living sound
about half of that in the New York City area.
Heres the three step retirement method:
A) Transformation. Sharpen the idea muscle and start brainstorming what else you
can do. Play in a jazz band? Open a caf? Open a used bookstore? Start a website?
Write a novel? What the hell do you really want to do? The world is open to you.
B) The world is open to you, part II. With your current savings plus what you can
make in your transformed job (and assume three years of living before you make a
single dime at your transformed job), wheres the cheapest place you can go that still
fits your minimum needs of comfort and beauty. Explore the world a little. Its your
oyster. You can live anywhere.
C)

Do it.

CHARLIE SHEEN
What are your thoughts about the scene from Wall Street when
Charlie Sheen sits in his apartment with beautiful girl and says life
is great? @Julian_Lenz
A lot of times we strive for things that we think will increase our happiness: sex with
the beautiful person at the gym. More money. A lot more money. A house. A nice big
house. A nice car. Winning that last hand of poker, etc.
But think about all these things: you have sex with the beautiful woman one day
(happiness!) and the next day youre wondering where she is when she doesnt return
your calls (unhappiness!). You make a lot of money on a deal (happiness) and then you
lose it on the next (misery!).
This is not real happiness. Its a mountain: the entire time you are walking up you are
sweating and in pain. Then you get to the peak and you look around and youre happy.
And then you go down the mountain you no longer have that same happiness.
This peak happiness is not real happiness. Its a fake happiness. Its a dopamine
addiction created happiness.

OCCUPY WALL STREET

What is your stance on Occupy Wall Street? @KarimGuessous
I think a lot of people, including myself, have been badly hurt by the financial crisis that
occurred in 2007-9 but really began in 2000-2002 and can be argued, began much
earlier.
The problem is this: I used to live right on Wall Street. So I know the people who
actually work there. Many of those people lost their jobs, their pensions, their homes,
their savings, their 401ks, etc.
I hate to think now that along with all that they already lost they have to deal with
thousands of people shouting at them and shoving signs in their faces as they try to get
to work. A shit job they have to go to feed their families.
I understand Wall Street is symbolic but the reality is that Wall Street moved to Park
Avenue between 45th and 57th Street many years ago. I used to live in the same
building where JP Morgan worked (it got converted to rentals). Now Jami Dimon, the
CEO of JP Morgan works on 45th Street near Park Avenue. And the hedge funds are all
in Greenwich, Connecticut. And the SEC and the Federal Reserve are in Washington
DC. Why protest in the face of hard working Americans when the real culprits who
should be put on trial live and work elsewhere.
Here is the thing. OW!
Thats what the Occupy Wall Street people are feeling. They are in pain:
A)
B)
C)
D)

They lost their jobs

They lost money while rich people got bonuses
They lost their homes
Maybe they lost their families

All of the above happened to me. Specifically in 2008. I could easily be down there
protesting for the same reasons.
But, I actually lived there for several years. On Wall Street. My roof overlooked the New

York Stock Exchange.

You never saw a sorrier, sadder group of people going to work every day than on Wall
Street in March, 2009. The actual people who work on Wall Street are low-level people
who are slaves of the banks. These people lost everything. Now, to top off their
depression, the protestors are waving signs in their faces as if the Wall Streeters are
the guilty ones.
Let me tell you something: the guilty parties live in Greenwich, CT. Work on Park
Avenue and Washington, DC, and they are more than happy to see Occupy Wall Street
all the way downtown on Wall Street.
Because of the lack of organization, the Occupy Wall Streeters think they are protesting
something symbolic: the greed of Wall Street. The rich bankers are 5 miles north
laughing their way to the bank.
Lets get the banks to start lending again. Lets let the stock market go up instead of
protesting it. When there is more money in the system, more people will get hired,
more people will find opportunities, more businesses will get funded. Being angry at the
people who lost the most wont help anyone.
99% OF THE COUNTRY DOESNT CARE ABOUT OCCUPY WALL STREET.
Clearly people are angry. 9/11. The dot-com bust. The housing bubble (which provided
for housing for many people who could not otherwise afford it) followed by the bust (all
of those people then lost their houses), the Lehman crisis, the financial and
unemployment crisis, the government bailouts that didnt seem to have any check at all
on CEO compensation. Heck, Im angry. And filled with regrets over this past decade
and what I could have done differently to avoided some of the pain that spread
throughout the country and world.
But, lets keep the pain in check. Its time now for people to clean their own house
before barging in and cleaning everyone elses house.
But to say even more. Every decade our quality of life gets better. The bottom 99%,
the top 1%. All 100% gets better. Literacy goes up, lifespans go up, violence goes
down, the number of families with two cars goes up (and the number of car deaths go
down), etc.

Someone once told me, Dont look at whats in my wallet and I wont look at whats in
yours. The same thing here. Okay, CEOs took too much money. That sucks. Bush and
Obama gave them that money. It was horrible.
But now is the time for recovery. Get healthy first. Thats your choice about whether or
not you can get healthy: physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. Build your health.
Be a beacon to those around you so they can be a beacon to those around them.
Theres been horrible violence in these Occupy movements and theres been no real
demands. If you want to do some good in the world, get healthy, start a business (or
manage one) and make your business do the right things instead of the horrible things
that have happened this past decade. Become a leader, not a protestor, an innovator,
and not someone peeing in Zucotti Park (a park where many people I know (chess
players, food vendors) have had their lives disrupted negatively by these protestors of
graduate students.) Now is the time to move on and be successful and show the CEOs
of last decade how its done. Dont blame them or the government on your own
failures. Now is the time to succeed.

Whats up with the Wall St. protestors and now that its gone
global? What is their objective? @StealthAviator
The Wall Street protestors are angry. They are so angry it hurts. Let me tell you an
example. A good friend of mine has a credit score of 817. Which means hes not only
returned every penny he ever owed he probably gave the lenders even more money
and said, hey, go have a big party or something. Im paying for it. Ive never even
met someone with that credit score. To be honest, before I spoke to him (yesterday) I
thought the top score was 800. But he says he has 817 so I believe him. He also made
300k last year. He wants to buy a house for 500k and put 30 or 40% down.
Guess what? The banks wont lend to him. The banks have $1.6 trillion in cash. The
banks CEOs took home about a trillion in bonuses since the bailout. And yet they wont
give my hardworking friend a loan so he can live in a house with his wife and three
kids.
And thats the cream of the crop. There are a thousand stories of foreclosures, layoffs,
etc that are much worse. So people are angry. I get it.
But nothing the protestors do are going to change the banks. Its like all the people who

protested the Vietnam War at the Democratic Convention in 1968. Guess what! You
won. Nixon got elected. You were protesting the wrong thing at the wrong place and
towards the wrong people to get what you wanted accomplished.
The banks want to make money. They want to lend to people.
I can go two ways from here: personal or public.
Ill do public first:
A) The Fed needs to stop paying the banks to hold onto money. The Fed was so
paranoid that the banks were going to lose all of their money that they started paying
the banks 0.25% to hold onto their reserves. Why would the banks lend that out? The
Fed should just get out of the way. By the way, the Fed is located in Washington DC.
B) Why did we give any bailouts without some restrictions on executive
compensation? By the way, Congress and the President are in Washington DC.
C) There are 6mm private small businesses in the US. Instead of randomly printing
money and giving it to the defense industry ($3 trillion already spent in Iraq and
Afghanistan two countries I still cant find on a map if you had a gun to my head) why
not do one single little stimulus that incentivizes each of these 6mm small businesses to
hire one more person? Bam! Unemployment solved.
And now, more importantly, the personal:
A) Why are you so angry? Corporate America has always sucked. Think how much
better it is now than a century or so ago before child labor laws. Women garmentos
would go on fire and the bosses would keep them locked in until everyone died.
Children would work 80 hours a week for pennies. Heck, we had slaves.
B) If you want to walk comfortably, you cant cover the entire world with leather.
You put on sneakers.
C) Get my post out: The Nine Ways to Succeed (which really should be called The
Nine Obstacles to Success http://bit.ly/jxz9pM) and start following them. Start being
grateful for what you have. Start being the smartest person in the room.
D)

Plug all your leaks http://bit.ly/lbFfUW. Anger, even if justified, is a leak. I get

scared also. Im scared every day. I dont want the world to end. I want to have
opportunity for myself also, and my daughters, and their daughters. But that means I
have to work at it. The banks will never give it to me. Eventually a boom will come
again, like it always does, and the banks will throw money at all of us. But first, lets get
ready to take it and this time, lets not lose it.
So what about those big CEOs who took the bailout money? Should they be put in jail?
Who knows. Why did Washington DC give them that money? I dont know anything. Im
only worried about whats in my pocket right now. I dont care about Obama (other
than that I think we should Abolish the Presidency) and I dont care about Lloyd
Blankfein (other than that he didnt return my email several years ago but thats
another story). I worry about whats in my pocket, not yours and I trust will consistently
do the wrong thing, like they always have.

THE DAILY PRACTICE

Which of your daily practices is most important to your creativity?
@JulioD
I threw up all over the floor and my two year old said, throw up. I had just had a
steak dinner with two investment bankers. I was trying to pretend I wasnt quickly
going poor. But I was sick. I was sick in body, mind, soul, and even then my marriage
was probably falling apart and I was losing my house. My two year old was probably
scared seeing me on the floor with puke everywhere.
How do you get off the floor? How do you keep the universe excited and surprised by
your mere existence? Every time I would do so I would end up back on this floor. I
hope now Ive learned my lesson. I pray I learned it.
But everytime Ive been on the floor Ive applied the principles that I describe in this
post http://bit.ly/fuiRS9. In order to be creative you have to be healthy physically,
emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
All of them are equally important. For instance, how you can be creative if you are so
sick you are throwing up? Or if you are constantly arguing with wife or friends or
colleagues (the emotional side) or you are mentally sluggish or if you are spiritually
unable to surrender to the creative force inside of you.
Sometimes things are so bad for me I have to give up, I have to surrender. I have to
say, what the hell, Ive done everything I can, now I need some help. Who are you
surrendering to? It might very well be that creative force inside of you thats saying,
please let me out so I can run rampant throughout the universe. It doesnt have to be
god you surrender to but everything inside of you (your creativity) that you never knew
existed.
So everything is equally important. If one leg is missing then the chair will tip over and
fall down.

How many minutes each day do you meditate? @TodayTrader

The word meditation is almost a bad word. Americans dont like to sit around and do
nothing. They also, as a group, dont like new agey-stuff, or Eastern philosophy or
anything that puts a hold on the religious freedom which allows them to work hard,
make money, and enjoy the fruits of their success.
But the brain whirs around all day long. It cant stop: why did she says this? Why did he
do that? How much money do I have left? Where can I get a new job? And on and on.
What a drag that we are stuck in this constant stream of thoughts, unable to sit by the
shore and just watch them go by.
Meditation implies a few moments a day where you can sit on that shore and watch the
thoughts. But rather than limit it to a few minutes, how about a way to meditate all
day.
In The Power of Negative Thinking http://bit.ly/mXw4t1 I describe a meditation
technique that I use to try and meditate every second of the day. I think its hard for
most people to sit for 20 minutes a day and try to shut everything down. Better to train
yourself every day to be mindful of what you are thinking and drain yourself like a wet
dirty sponge of all the negative thoughts that plague us without stop.

How does one become a faster decision maker while still

maintaining the quality of your decision?
In one of my posts someone said, youre always pushing The Daily Practice
http://bit.ly/fuiRS9, but the fact is, when I was down on the floor, going broke, losing
my home, losing family, losing friends, losing businesses, any number of times over the
past 25 years, the only things thats lifted me up is simultaneously getting physically,
emotionally, mentally, and spiritually healthy.
Imagine that you have four bodies and not just one. And theres an invisible blood that
flows back and forth through each body, the way blood flows through your physical
body. If any of the bodies or out of balance, then this invisible blood will not flow. And

you will start to feel it. Youll get less healthy, your relationships will sour, your ability to
have ideas and execute on them will turn to crap, your ability to surrender and find
balance in your life will falter.
But when everything is in balance and the invisible blood is flowing, when the heart of
your being is pumping without any impediments, then you will make decisions faster,
better, smarter.

What is the single most important thing to do today, right now, to

move towards a better world? @ReadHeavily
I wrote about this in my post How to Change the World http://bit.ly/snVZZr and one
of the commenters said it best. Mother Theresa said if everyone swept in front of their
house then the end result would be a clean world.
The thing you can do today to make the world better is to make yourself better. By the
end of the day can you look back and check these boxes:
Physically I took care of myself (I exercised, ate well, didnt drink, slept well, went to
the bathroom, breathed in fresh air, etc)
Emotionally (I didnt dance the dance with anyone who wanted to engage me in a
negative way. I expressed gratitude and love to the people who loved me).
Mentally (I used my brain to come up with ideas, to make people laugh, to stretch
myself outside of my comfort zone in some way).
Spiritually (I was grateful to be alive. I am humbled to be alive. The pain I sometimes
feel is not the same as the real me but something that gloms onto me
unsuccessfully).
If you can do that then the result will be:
You will be better. So one person out of 7 billion is definitely better. Thats the first step
on changing the world.
The people immediately around you will be better. They will be inspired by your
presence. They will want to act with integrity and awareness around you.

Then the people around them will want to be better. And so on.
So you improving yourself ends up having an exponential network effect on the world
around you. Theres no better way to change the world for the better.
If you are angry at something (bank CEOs, Bush, Obama, etcetc) then the only thing
that gets spread is anger. Ive never seen that in thehistory of the world change
anything for the better.
Anger creates Hitlers.

Is there such a thing as righteous anger? (Example, being

outraged at Joe Paterno) @Theopaulson
Anger and fear are twins out of the same evil womb. Righteous anger only dresses it
up in pretty clothes.
Example, a lot of the Occupy X crowd (both the protesters and the police) are being
fueled by anger. There is over 1,000 documented cases of violence, antisemitism, anger
on both sides. Both sides feel righteous.
The USA felt righteous when it invaded Afghanistan. Thousands of civilian (and 18 year
old military people) deaths later and ten years later were still there. Did our righteous
convictions win? Do we feel better now? Is the world safer? Less corrupt?
I cant thing of any case where anger is righteous or justified. Lets say your boss yells
at you, for instance? Should you get angry back? Thats probably the easiest strategy if
you want to get fired. But youre never going to win an argument against someone who
is angry.
Best thing is to walk away and then come back and talk when he is more rational, or
quit if he is permanently irrational, or just do the best job you can with a horrible boss.
Lets say your spouse cheats on you. Will your anger be justified? It wont change the
past. You should then figure out what the best thing to do is? Move out? Divorce?
Address the issues that caused the betrayal (it always takes two to tango so no reason
to get angry when you also are at fault).

Fear, jealousy, anger, envy are all mirrors of each other. Better to calm those
tendencies, to be aware of them (being aware of anger is the easiest way to change it
from a flame to a simmer), and use these techniques http://bit.ly/fuiRS9 to restore
health in every way.
I know from my own experience: anger has led to me getting fired, having bad ideas,
not completing things, not sleeping, wasting moments when I couldve been happy,
building bad businesses, and on and on. Better to avoid, no matter how righteous.

JAMES FAVORITE THINGS

What TV shows are you watching these days? @perfectweapon
Louie, Rome, Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Mad Men, Shameless, Arrested
Development (on iTunes), In Treatment, Entourage. Any others that are out right now I
should be watching?

I read non-fiction voraciously but want to read some more fiction.

What novels could you recommend most highly? @importgenius
I used to be like that. But then I realized that most non-fiction writers have zero writing
skills so its hard to actually get through one of their books. I really like fiction writers
that have strong autobiographical voices so I can learn from not only their stories but
also the strength and quality of their literary voices. Here are a few that I re-visit often:
Ham on Rye by Charles Bukowski is the novel of the 20th Century in my opinion.
[See. "6 Things I Learned from Charles Bukowsi" http://bit.ly/qKAEUq]
Jesus Son by Denis Johnson is the best collection of short stories.
No One Belongs Here More Than You by Miranda July
Anything by Raymond Carver
Whores for Gloria by WillliamVollmann (or Rainbow Stories by him)
I Never Liked You Anyway a graphic novel by Chester Brown
Start with those and youve started with the best fiction on the planet in history (in my
opinion)

What are your top 3 favorite movies? -@authenticvoytek

I have more than 3 favorites. BUT:
Lawrence of Arabia
Gandhi

Schindlers List
Why those three? Because they are all epic, they are all terrifying. They are all roughly
true stories (the Truth is often a 1000x more interesting than fiction).
And they all deal with people who have a certain degree of craziness. People who
through their personal nobility, their hardships, their inner demons and angels, rose up
and created an entirely new world from that nobility and craziness. Whenever I see one
of those movies, I want to be like the main character, someone with the inner strength
to change the world, to change everything around me with the force of my will. Thats
what those movies are about.
Plus, in those three movies, the cinematography is without compare. Even Lawrence of
Arabia which is so much older than any modern special effects movie today. The desert
landscapes are beautiful, and the pace of the movie, the music, the language, the
acting, all fit the pace of being in a desert slow, thirsty for more, beautiful. And
Lawrence is so insane, so crazy, and yet so determined to be a leader among men. To
shine where he was not allowed to shine in the strict confines of the class system of
England. Ditto for the other two.
BUT: I have to add now:
The Conversation, After Hours, and my all-time favorite comedy: Superbad as
runners-up.

What are your favorite self-help books? @YoavEzer

Self help is a weird phrase. I dont like most of the self help industry and heres why:
its 1000s of books written by people who have experienced mild failure and little
success but they want to make million crowding that section of the bookstore. So who
are they helping? Also, when you look at recent self-help books (a lot of the authors
mentioned in The Secret) they seem to be doused in scandal. Who needs it?
Also, what are they helping you do? Many self-help books are about making money. Im
convinced before you can truly make money (and keep it, and be happy with it) you
have to first make sure all the energy is properly flowing inside of yourself. This is the
entire basis of my post on The Daily Practice http://bit.ly/fuiRS9.

So instead of recommending anything that is on the bookshelf Im going to recommend

a few public domain titles:
A)
The yoga sutras of Patanjali are not just for people interested in yoga. The text
is from 300 BC and contains 195 lines. I think what was happening is that Buddhism
was stealing so many adherents of Hinduism that it provoked in a very marketing-like
fashion, a response. So this guy, Patanjali, basically repeated what Buddha said but
added a few more things (sitting straight, which led to yoga) and more on breathing
(which led to the study of pranayama).
My post, How to Deal with Crappy People http://bit.ly/jyJFzP was based on Chapter 1,
line 33 of the Yoga Sutras.
B)
I recommend the Lojong Slogans written in the 12th Century AD. It was a set of
59 lines used to transmit Indian Buddhism to Tibet. And basically discussed how to
work through the things that plague your soul (similar to many self-help books today).
PemaChodron (a popular self-help writer today from the Buddhist tradition) bases much
of her work on these slogans.
C) More contemporary. Wallace Wattles book, The Science of Getting Rich (written in
1900 so is public domain) is the basis for most self-help books afterwards (even
Napoleon Hills Think and Grow Rich from 1937 is based on Wattles earlier works and
The Secret is almost 100% based on it). Wattles approach is very serious: money is
good, never think about poverty, only think about getting rich. Never worry about your
past, never talk about it, never associate with anyone who can bring you down. Only
think about being rich and how good that will make the world.
If I had to recommend one contemporary guy Id pick Eckhart Tolle. While he mentions
Jesus frequently in his book his work is very much based on a sect of Hinduism called
Advaita Vedanta and mostly based on the work of a guy named RamanaMaharshi.

What is your favorite chapter in your last book? @ClaudiaYoga

Ok, shes being sneaky. Shes my wife. Bad Claudia! Now you force me to self-promote.
And I even heard your giggling while you were typing that tweet so you arent fooling
anyone.

But its a good question. She knows people will think my book might be just a collection
of blog posts and she wants me to always describe how its different.
In my blog I constantly recommend The Daily Practice http://bit.ly/fuiRS9 to pick
yourself up when you find yourself on the floor and are having trouble getting up and
started again. In this book, in the chapter, What is True Happiness and Success I
provide a lot of modifications to that practice thats not anywhere on the blog.
Also, in the introduction I provide an overriding arc which suggests that the first step in
success is acknowledging how much weve been brainwashed, who has brainwashed
us, how do we get over the brainwashing, and then from there what are the steps
needed to be truly happy with our lives. I think these are useful chapters. At least, they
have been for me. As I say in the conclusion, Dont believe me. Try these things for
yourself. And then see what happens.

FAQ

ME

TOO

BUSINESS / ENTREPRENEURSHIP
Potential client that has shown interest in my product no longer
returns my calls, should I drive to him and see what's going on?
@TheRakker
This is a law of the universe: time is relative. When you need money or love,
time moves faster for you. When you are giving money or love, time moves slower.
When I was raising money for a hedge fund I'd pitch someone on Thursday. It
would be a great meeting. On Friday I'd be pacing back and forth, "is he really going to
let this weekend go by without calling me about the money?" I'd think. Would someone
actually be THAT RUDE?
Or one time I was going out with someone. I listed for her the reasons why I
thought we were great together. I wanted her to come up with a similar list. "I'll sit by
the phone until you call me back with your list," I said. The phone never rang all night.
When I woke up I, of course, had to call her. "Oh," she said, "you mean you wanted
that list right away?"
RIGHT AWAY? IT WAS THE WHOLE FUCKING NIGHT THAT WENT BY.
When someone wanted me to put money in their business I said, "looks good, I'll
get back to you on it." Three weeks later I got an impassioned hand-written note: "Did
I do something wrong? I thought you were a good guy and then I didn't hear from you
for three weeks." When I was single I would lose facebook friends if I didn't call a girl
back fast enough. Not only would she unfriend me but all of our mutual friends.
Time is relative. But there are corollaries to that. If somethinig approaches the
speed of light, mass gets infinitely big and time slows down to zero. If you love
someone A LOT and they don't return that love then the importance of everymoment
gets unnnaturally big and timefeels infinitely slow.

So what you are going through is the "time is relative" phenomenon. Basically,
your client hates you. But you want your client badly. He has no interest at all and
never wantsto hear from you again. But his importance has become unnaturally big and
time waiting for him has become infinitely slow. SO it's hard to move on with life. You
need to moving at the same speed and as all of your other potenital opportunities.
You need to diffuse the matter. Or reach a middle ground. Here's how you reach
a middle ground. Send update letters once a month. No pressure. "Here's our latest
products". "Here's our latest returns." "here's our latest clients". And so on. Just an
update. Your moving timeand space back to normal. Will he ever respond. Probably not.
But the laws of the universe have been obeyed. And you haven't fallen into a
black hole of waiting and frustration. The world is safely in it's normal orbit. And you
get a chance to spring forward life again instead of falling right into the sun.

Is it worth having a big client if you know they might be a pain to

work with? @BenDelphia
No. Fire that client. I don't care how much money they pay you. There's a
saying, "God doesn't close one window without opening another." Take out the word
"God" if you don't like it. "One window doesn't close without another one opening".
Surrender to that quote. It ALWAYS works. It might not seem like it when one window
closes, particularly if it closes on your hands. Particularly when it hurts and you scream
out loud. And cry. But it works.
I had a client once who never paid on time, who always asked for bribes, who
called me at three in the morning begging for advice, who lied constantly about what
the size and scope of every deal was. Who would literally yell at me if I wasn't his
friend. I would go to psychiatrists and even astrologers (and sometimes
psychiatrist/astrologers) to figure out how I can be true to myself if I was constantly
faking being friends with this client. I hated myself, hated him, hated going to work at
my own business.

Until I finally dropped him. And I started focusing on the good clients. And they
started feeding my business more work. And they paid on time. And they treated me
with respect. And I didn't have to pretend to be something I wasn't. And I could
sincerely say what I thought and not be afraid of being cursed at or lose the business
or made fun of or not paid on time. I stopped living in fear. And my business got
bigger.
And then I sold the business as fast as I could. Because life is too short.

What is your biggest advice in obtaining success as an

entrepreneur? @SerenaBlasing
There is no such thing as success as an entrepreneur.
If you ask ten different people what success means you might get ten different
answers. Financial freedom, paying down debts, building a big company, personal
freedom, etc and there might be psychological goals as well: proving everyone wrong,
proving my parents wrong, proving that I can make the impossible possible, and so on.
Many rich people become entrepreneurs even though they have financial freedom
already. Many poor people become "lifestyle entrepreneurs" - they never get rich from
their business but their business sustains their lifestyle.
But one thing is in common with anyone who truly is a successful entrepreneur:
they set out to create a solution that would make people's lives easier.
If you always have the affirmation in your mind, "I need to give to receive"
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2010/11/give-and-you-will-receive/, and force all of
your thoughts to coalesce around that affirmation, then over time and experience you
will create a product or service that will make people's lives easier or better or
wealthier. This is a service that people will pay you more than cost for.
I've been involved in many successful businesses. I've also been involved in
many unsuccessful businesses.

I've written about many of them here. For instance, I thought I had a great idea
once: 140love.com. I created a dating site on top of twitter. I thought it was brilliant
and I even had investors. What could be better: a dating site (which is a universally
accepted successful business model - bringing two people together so they can kiss,
have sex, have great pleasure, get married, have kids, prolong the human race, etc)
combined with twitter, the fastest growing social network at the time. I was single then
and heavily using both dating services and twitter. Plus twitter was "cool" in the tech
community and I wanted to be cool.
The idea would be that people can't fake it on twitter. My service would match
you with people similar to you and then you could judge whether or not you want to go
out with them by their tweet feed. No bullshit profiles. You'd see the real them with
their tweets.
Here's the problem. The very basic problem. On dating sites people like to be
largely anonymous. On twitter, people weren't anonymous. So I wasn't helping anyone.
If anything, I'd hurt anyone who signed up for 140love. Failure. I spent $40,000
developing it.
Here's another failure: Junglesmash.com. I wrote about it here
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/05/an-idea-i-had-that-went-down-the-drain/ but
I'll describe really quickly. I wanted to crowdsource advertising. Typically a big brand
hires an ad agency and pays them millions of dollars to create and then spread an ad
campaign. I love a good ad.
So I set up a site, I picked a random brand (Crest) and offered $2000 to anyone
who made an ad that I liked. Hundreds of people submitted ads. PROCTER & GAMBLE
EVEN SUBMITTED ADS. I knew this was going to be a success because:
1) I was helping people make money.
2) I was helping people have an outlet for their creativity where they can make
money.
3) I was reducing the costs of creating an ad campaign by the major brands. I
always think when you take out the middleman that's a valuable service you can
offer as an entrepreneur.
4) I was reducing the costs of distribution since the good ad campaigns could

conceivably grow viral and create brand awareness.

5) Finally, I was getting results. Both people and brands were responding.
So why did this fail? Because I personally failed. It's still a good idea. But
precisely those months I was going through a separation, moving houses, I was trying
to start a fund that was failing, the financial crisis was scaring me, and I was slipping
through the rabbit hole leading me into depression, despair, and a black hole of
desperation that would take me awhile to get out of. When I came out the other side I
was better for it, but I no longer was doing it.
Other businesses I was involved in that I consider successful:
Reset, Inc. - Back in 1995, very few companies had a website. My only
competitors were companies like Razorfish that would charge a million dollars for
a 5 page website. I was able to compete on price and quality and grew my
business until I sold it.
Stockpickr - a financial site that was pure stock ideas. No news. In order to pick
stocks you have to avoid the news. I've been involved in the management of
several public companies. What you see on the inside is a lot different from what
you see on the outside. It's like a black hole. Nobody knows what really goes on
inside a black hole because information would have to escape the gravitational
pull at faster than the speed of light. Same thing with a public company. So I
created the one website that had ten different ways to come up with stock ideas,
combined it with community, and did away with all news. The result was millions
of unique visitors per month plus good advertisers like Fidelity.
A mental health facility - The mental health space is very regulated. And it's all
about filling beds. This particular facility treated teenage addicts. They had a way
of getting through all the regulations. They also had a way of quickly expanding
their number of beds by buying cheap hotels and converting them. There were
no other facilities in their state so they had a monopoly. So once again, helping
people in ways that the people could not otherwise be helped. The business sold
for a huge multiple of earnings.
There are others but when I look back on the ones that were successful versus
the good ideas I described above that was unsuccessful I can think of two common
denominators:
1) Help others. You have to really make sure you're not just coming up with a
"cool" idea but that you are actually solving a problem that many people have.

2) Persistence. In every business I probably thought I was going out of business

over a hundred times. Or my investment (in cases like Buddy Media) was going
to zero many times. You have to constantly problem solve and not judge yourself
so harshly on your bad decisions that you give up. I'll have another post on
persistence. But at the very least have this checklist before you start a business.
If you have just these two things then success will be achieved, whether or not it
matches your definition of success.

What kind of startup would get your attention - enough for you to
talk about it? @AnujAdhiya
A startup that would get my attention is one that i would use every day.
With startups most people focus on the idea. Everybody wants the biggest,
baddest, best new new thing. The thing that will beat Google combined with Apple
combined with Facebook.
It ain't gonna happen. Or, at the very least, if someone had that idea they are
not going to show it to me. They are going to show it to Peter Thiel. And with his secret
Illuminati of Paypal mafia he's going to invest $200,000 and make $5 billion on it while
I sit out here in the cold trying to figure out why I'm not one of the cool guys who got
into Facebook and Twitter in the seed round.
I'm no good, by myself, at investing in startups. One time I invested in a startup
with profits, with low capital expenditures, with growing revenues, and I did it all by
myself because I thought I have to grab all this for me. I invested a big amount. Then
the company somehow went out of business or the CEO stole the money or whatever. I
don't know. It was part of how I went broke.
So now I have a checklist of when to invest. Whenever I follow this checklist, I
make a lot of money. Whenever I don't follow this checklist, I lose money. It's like
clockwork.
1) The CEO has to have built and sold a similar business before. This would've kept
me out of Google, Apple, Microsoft, Yahoo, and Facebook (but not Twitter, Intel,

or Broadcast.com). I basically have no way to judge a product. It may be good

or it may not be. But if the CEO has done it before then I can check the box. It
doesn't have to be the exact same product (Buddy Media is an example where I
invested and Lazerow had started two prior businesses but none exactly related
to Facebook although I would say similar) but the CEO needs to be smarter than
me in the area he's starting his business.
2) I need to have good co-investors. I'm an investor in Israeli startup CTera, for
instance, where Benchmark Capital and Venrock are my co-investors. They are
smarter than me and they have a team of bloodhounds who did due diligence. In
addition, I called the heads of sales in every country. I called customers. I did
background checks, etc. So my due diligence combined with the due diligence of
people smarter than me was enough to keep me happy. For Buddy Media, Peter
Thiel was among the co-investors. BAM!
3) Demographics have to be on my side. I'll use Buddy Media again as an example.
This was in 2007 when I invested. A month earlier I had gone on CNBC saying
that I thought Facebook would eventually be worth $100 billion. At the time I
don't even know if it was valued at one billion but I had a strong feeling about
the demographic trend. How come? Because I was using it every day and more
and more people I knew from every walk of my life were using it, regardless of
their backgrounds. So this was happening. I'm invested in another company right
now (IPO expected within the next month) that does personalized cancer
diagnostics. 75 million baby boomers are aging. A lot of them will get cancer.
They all want to live forever. BOOM! Huge market.
4) I have to get a deal. The valuation has to be better than any comparable
investment out there. Somehow I have to be getting a discount to where I think
the value is in my head. It has to be a discount to RIGHT NOW valuations. Not to
where I think the company is going. Not everyone wants to sell pieces of their
companies at a discount. Often you have to wait for the right environment where
discounts are available and everyone else is afraid to invest. There are other
tricks to getting a deal. For instance, when venture capitalists invest they do
something I normally consider stupid. They try to get a deal by saying "we have
to at least get our money back if the company sells". This is called a "liquidation
preference". They might get other terms also.
Guess what? That makes their stock more expensive than common stock. BUT when
the company is sold or IPOs, all the preferred stock converts to common stock anyway.
Let me tell you something. The company is either going to exit for a higher price or the
company is going to go out of business. Either way the preferred equals the common
stock. Zero or HUGE. So once the preferred price is established by the big shot venture
capitalists you can often get a discount by buying common stock. This doesn't always

work (Groupon) but it usually works if you are making sure you are getting a discount.
Great in environments like right now where everyone is afraid of pulling another
Groupon.
5) I have to see the exit. I have to have a general sense of how big the company
can grow and what the exit can look like. I'm helped considerably by the fact
that my co-investors are smarter than me and they are all looking for 10x returns
on their investments. So we'll see.
6) I keep the investment small. Never more than 1-2% of the capital I have to
invest. So no one investment will destroy me.
And that's what gets me excited about an investment.

What's the best advice for a 24yr old entrepreneur?

@BumperPickner
There's only one advice: persistence.
How to be persistent:
Know that failure happens every day. In small ways and in big ways. I would hire
the wrong person (small way), I would start the wrong business (big way), I'd
make the wrong investment (medium way, depending on size of investment).
But failure happens every day. If 50% of your decisions work out then you are
doing ok.
Don't smoke crack. When I started my wireless software business I thought
immediately it was a big Fortune 500 company that would go public and make
billions. When someone wanted to negotiate valuation down I was like, "are you
crazy?! We are worth ten times that!" Someone once offered to buy the
company for $70 million. NO WAY! I was smoking my own crack. I've seen a lot
of crack smokers since then. I can always tell a crack smoker. They say their
name of their company and it's like they are saying "Coca-Cola" a brand that has
existed forever that will never go away. Always double-check that you aren't
smoking crack.
Don't become attached to one idea. You're 24. Let's look at similar 24 year olds.
Larry Page and Sergey Bring came up with their little tweak on search algorithms

and they called it first "Backrub" and then "Google". They spelled "Googol wrong.
Perhaps on purpose. In any case, they really wanted to be academics. So they
tried to sell their business to Yahoo. Guess what they asked. ONE MILLION
DOLLARS! And Yahoo said, "no". (see also 10 Unusual Things I Didn't Know
About Google http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/03/10-unusual-things-aboutgoogle/)
They were probably dreaming of what they would do with $500,000 each. History
proved Yahoo wrong. But guess what. That was the ONLY time basically that a situation
like that worked out for the entrepreneur. Take the money and run. When you are 24
don't get religious about any idea. If someone offers you money that increases your
odds of financial stability, you take it. You'll be an entrepreneur for the rest of your life.
You'll make a lot of money no matter what. But always TAKE money that is offered you.
Don't die in the details. In other words: don't try to patent your idea. Don't get
bogged down in legal agreements. Don't get bogged down with accountants.
Focus on only one thing: building a product that someone wants, and then
getting someone to pay you for it. If nobody will pay you for it, tweak your idea
until someone does, or bundle your product as a service that you offer that
someone will you for. Ask potential customers for advice on what they will pay
for. Keep repeating this until someone pays you. Then worry about the details,
as your business is growing.
The buck stops with you. In the beginning you have all of these roles: CEO,
director of product development, head of marketing, head of sales, head of
customer service, head of investor relations. Don't give those roles to anyone
else unless you absolutely trust them. Don't delegate before you have something
to delegate.
Keep adding ideas. You have a product. Great. Now add a new feature. Done?
Add a new one. Done? Ok, add another. And keep going. I wish in my first
business I had done that. I made money but not as much as I think I could've.
Try not to raise money. Of course, at 24, you don't have money. But see how far
you can go without money. If your product can start off as a service, then your
customers will pay your bills. Eventually you build up and rent a small space.
eventually you build from there and hire an intern. And so on. You can raise
money when people are begging to give you money. That's the best time to raise
money. When it's easy. And then always raise when it's easy. Because you don't
want to be stuck when it's hard.
Give up fast. If an idea is not working, move on. The best way to push a boat is

to let the current push it. You always want to go with the current. You'll feel
when things are easy and you are going with the flow. Don't force it. If you are
forcing it then eventually you'll end up where you started.
Learn from mistakes. You failed? You made a bad decisions? Learn, analyze,
study, write it down, figure it out. You won't make the same mistake twice. Also,
be ready to blame yourself. Don't blame others. If your business failed then then
only fault is with you. Not y0ur partners (pick better partners next time - your
fault) and not your clients (pick better clients). It's ALWAYS your fault when you
fail.

I've just started a website for a small photography business.

What's are some good ways to get traffic to the site? @pscols
There's maybe an entire post for this now that I brainstorm on it.
There's like a ladder that starts at quality and ends with quantity. Let's
brainstorm the steps in the middle.
1) Quality. When I started Stockpickr.com I wanted a lot of traffic for it. So I did
what no other site in the financial space was doing. I put up no news but nonstop ideas for stock picks. And I based the picks not on my opinions but on the
opinions of great investors like Warren Buffett, etc but also other investors in the
community. And I kept adding features. Like we added a Q&A (sort of a "quora
for stocks") that drove a lot of traffic. So it was a quality site. For my blog, as
another example, I try to follow these two rules: quality writing + it helps
people.
2) Everything else is quantity</strong>. It's about choosing yourself rather than
letting other people choose you. I used to think "If only the Wall St Journal
published my articles then I would be happy" but nothing could be further from
the truth anymore. Now the truth is: you need to be in charge of your own
destiny. The big, bad media companies may reach down from the skies and
choose you but they will do so on their terms and not yours, even if it's against
their own best interests to build your brand. Only you will build your brand.
So here's how you choose yourself.

 Comment on every blog related to your site. Sometimes link back to your blog
but usually don't. Don't be annoying. Instead, become a trusted source and
friend on every blog you comment on.
Syndicate material and ideas to the top blogs in your sector (in your case, the
photo biz)
Put your photos all over Pinterest. Follow everyone you can on Pinterest so
people follow back.
Create fan pages for different topics related to your photos on Facebook
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/06/the-choose-yourself-era-how-to-get100000-facebook-fans/ Use my techniques I describe here to get 100,000+ fans
for each page. Then put your photos on the page so it appears in the newsfeeds
of your fans. Photos on Facebook get the highest engagement and will improve
the "EdgeRank" for all your pages so they get on more and more newsfeeds.
You have a really great photo? tweet it.</strong> Pay to promote the tweet.
Write a book on photography. Self-publish. Give it away for 99 cents or cheaper
if you can. Here's my tips on self-publishing
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/01/self-publishing-your-own-book-is-thenew-business-card/
Answer questions about photography on Quora
Link with other photographers</strong> on LinkedIn
Over time you will have created a platform. And it will take time. but you will
build your base and it will be as if you have your own television network that you can
broadcast out your message to. But, of course, it all boils down to step 1. Make you you
have the greatest message in the world to broadcast.

What is the biggest mistake entrepreneurs make?

@LeonBenson2
One time I started a company and raised a quick $30 million and bought a bunch
of companies and then tried to go public and then it went down in flames and everyone

lost everything. http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/01/how-i-screwed-yasser-arafatout-of-2mm-and-lost-100mm-in-the-process/

Another time I started a company and raised $0 and everyone made millions.
I'll tell you the difference between the two companies. Money.
Not how much money I raised. But how much I thought about it.
When I started the first company above all I would think about was how much
money I was going to make. I was already spending it. I had it all planned out. I was
even looking for apartments. I was planning out what my personal Super Bowl
commercial would look like. I was going to ask Spike Jonze to direct it. I was wondering
what kind of private jet I would buy.
What did the company do? You might ask. Well, I don't know. I bought a
company, then two, then three. They all seemed to be in the "wireless Internet" space.
But I had no idea what they did. We tried to go public. CS First Boston was going to
take us public. They came back to us and said, "we have no idea what you do." Nobody
in upper management (where I was CEO) had a clue what we did for a living. Were we
even making money? I had no idea. We had $30 million in the bank. Who cares? I tried
to sell the company. We could've sold for maybe $50 million. Not enough! We were
going to go public for a billion!
And we lost everything.
The second company started during a period when I had almost nothing in the
bank. The second I started the company I stopped checking my bank account like I
was obsessively doing every ten minutes of the day to see when it was, exactly, the
moment that I would disappear and die.
I started to love what I was doing. I came up with more and more ideas for the
site. I wanted the site to be perfect. I kept adding more features. It was perfect. Yahoo
loved my site. AOL did. I went up to Google and they loved it. Reuters loved it.
Everyone did. People would write me and say, "please remove my account from your
site because I'm too addicted to it."
Not once did I check my bank account. I knew I had value. I was creating more
and more of it every day. I had no more need to worry about when I was going broke.

Even though venture capitalists were calling me every day I said "no" to all of them.
And eventually I sold the business and was very happy. And, without my love pumping
into the site every day, the site quickly degenerated. I feel bad looking at it now. It's
ugly.
The biggest mistake entrepreneurs make is the biggest mistake people make
when looking for a spouse. Don't think about money. Fall in love.

How important is focusing on one business venture at a time?

What about entrepreneurship? @TiisetsoMaloma
It's not important at all to focus on one business venture at a time. In fact, I
would counsel the opposite.
Let's take Google as an example. When Larry Page and Sergey Brin were just
starting Google they had one goal. Sell it as quickly as possible so they could get back
to the other things that interested them: academia. They tried to sell Google for $1
million to Yahoo and Yahoo said "no". So they were stuck with google.com and they ran
with it, not figuring out how to generate revenues until another four years went by.
When I started Stockpickr.com I started probably 10 other businesses at the
same time. I built keauty.com to be a beauty contest. I built SmokeLove.com to be a
dating site for smokers. I built a site that helped people create contests. I really pushed
hard on every idea. I had VCs interested in several of the ideas. But finally, like in a
horse race, Stockpickr.com stuck it's nose out in front as the site that was getting the
most attention. So I dropped the others and ONLY THEN I focused.
Always have multiple balls in the air in the beginning. This way if one falls to the
ground, you are still in the show. The true entrepreneur is looking at everything for
opportunity. Opportunity, though, takes its time before giving it's blessing on one idea
over another. Give it that time, but also give it many options.

Did you start having networking lunches with wealthy people

before or after u became wealthy? Thanks! @tresaca

No, I was always wealthy when I networked. Not in money but in ideas. No
random person wants to have lunch with you. Nor do they care if you pay for the lunch.
What the random person needs is an idea or a connection that will make their life
better or that will make them more money. I prepare at least 1-3 hours before any
lunch I have with a new person.
So have wealth in ideas. This is the greatest thing you can offer someone. Before
I ever meet someone, and this counts for the last 20 years of having lunch with people,
I prepare ideas that I think will help them. I try not to think of how they can help me. If
I help them, I know that sometime in the future they will help me. Networking is not
about drawing a giant graph on your whiteboard of all the people you are connected to,
and who they are connected to, and so on down the chain.
Networking is about who you have given to without any expectation in return.
The entire world is like this quantum bank of probabilities. If you increases someone's
probable chance of success, then you have just increased your quantum net worth in
this bank. Eventually you will be able to cash that in. Not necessarily in money. Not
necessarily in a new job. But you will be able to cash it in. In the world of infinite
possibility. It will be wonderful.

As a startup, what's the fastest and easiest way to gain reputation

with customers aside from a great product? @dexteryz
I know there are some books on this but I, unfortunately, have never read them.
I've made a lot of mistakes in this area where I built a reputation and then I lost it.
100% of the time it had to do with poor communication. For instance, in October, 2008
I was managing a small piece of someone else's hedge fund. I was down that month.
At the same time, my marriage was falling apart. It had actually been falling apart for
years but this particular month it was REALLY falling apart. Arguments every day that
were raw to the bone. All I can remember on top of this is that the financial system was
also falling apart and for some reason it was raining every day.
I'm sure if I looked back at the weather reports it would show that it wasn't
raining every day. But I can't remember a single day where it wasn't raining. Where I
wasn't on my hammock and being rained on. Where I wasn't walking back from the
local museum where I tried to hide in the afternoons and being completely drenched.

Where I wasn't outside talking to my partners and thinking, "this phone will get ruined
in the rain". Where my kids weren't inside the house all the time wondering when I
would come in and play with them. It was wet, raining, and my eyes were blurry from
crying.
And one time my "customer" called me and said, "you really need to learn to
communicate with people". And he pulled his money from me. I've written about this
before but now we are friends and work together often on a deal by deal basis. But at
the time I thought I would never talk to him again. That time when we spoke was only
after I had avoided about 20 of his calls and emails.
The same thing happened when building websites for a living. I had a designer
that nobody wanted to use. And yet he was the designer on almost all of the projects.
So I was avoiding the calls from customers begging me tp take him off the project. And
I was avoiding talking to him about it. Finally, companies would call me in for a face to
face meeting (always ugly. ugly faces everywhere, ugly scowls, ugly comments, always
"we wish we didn't have to have this talk", etc) and I'd have to reel them back in.
So here's my guidelines on keeping reputation for ANY business: service or
product businesses.
stay in touch with customers. If you have only a few customers, call them every
few days, even if it's just to chat. You may find hidden needs that they have that
you can fulfill, even for free.
don't be afraid to do extra. I always try to surprise customers with extra service.
Something they didn't expect. Then they know that with all the other guys they
will get what they see, with me - they will get a surprise. Always.
blog. If you have many customers, you can keep in touch with them via
blogging. And with blogging, follow my suggestions
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/05/10-rules-about-blogging/. Bleed, add
value, share ideas, and then syndicate also to get those ideas out as far as
possible.
customer service. When a customer has a problem, solve it immediately. Give
them things for free. Scour twitter for comments about you and respond to
them. Every forum is a customer service forum for you.
"Thank you". Say thank you to everyone. Commenters, twitters, customers. Say

thank you in every way you know possible.

"Crush it". I'm borrowing this from Gary Vaynerchuk's book "Crushing It" and I
know it works because I've used it. Go on every blog related to your company's
sector and start posting comments. Don't link back to your site always. Only
sometimes. Maybe one in five. Go on Quora, Pinterest, Wikipedia and become a
quality source about all things related to your company. I use every social
medium as a channel. You should also.
Become the source. Look at Yahoo. They were a website that became big by
being THE source for all other websites. Find everything related to your sector.
Become the directory of all tools, websites, blogs, related to your sector. OWN
the sector. On facebook, twitter, your site, pinterest, etc.
Building a great product is, as you point out, #1. But no man is an island and
people live and die by communication. Keep people from loneliness and you have a
customer for life.

When you quit your job and focused on your business, did you still
hate mondays? @martefrain
I used to love my job. It was only when I began to hate Mondays, in fact when I
hated every day, that I knew I had to quit it and focus on building the business that
until then had just been a side-business.
I built the business up and eventually sold it. It was a good result.
BUT, here's the problem. You never get rid of the Mondays. Every day becomes
a Monday. When you are at a boring corporate job you have several things going for
you: nobody really cares that much at the job. Everyone leaves their work at the desk.
Everyone takes off weekends. Everyone takes vacations. And during the summer
nobody is expecting much from you.
That all changes when you have your own business. Here are the things you
suddenly start worrying about:
Is every project getting done on time

 What else can I be doing for each client

How do I get new clients. It's hard. Do I just cold-call them? How do I get word
of mouth going? Do I go to parties? Do I "pivot"? Argh, what do I do!?
I know I have enough cash coming in to pay employees for 3 more months. But
what happens then? What happens on month 4?
Will my family survive if the business crashes in 12 months?
Who can I sell my business to? How do I start preparing to sell my business?
One of my employees today is crying because her boss (my partner) was talking
about her behind her back and she heard? How do I talk to her about it? How do
I talk to him about it?
Another employee is sleeping with another employee and its not going to work
out. How will this effect the project they are both working on for our biggest
client?
I feel like I need a head of sales but everyone I talk to wants a big piece of the
company? How do I structure this?
Should I productize my service? Will I make more money that way?
How do I get client XYZ to pay his bills?
And on and on. The worries never end. You never sleep. Every day becomes
Monday. Every minute becomes 3am Monday morning. Every day there is constant
battles and meager successes to drive you forward. And sometimes there are stretches
where it's all 2 steps forward and three steps backwards.
I never once considered going back to the corporate job. It would be
embarassing. A failure. I had to keep going forward. But the Mondays never ended.
And 17 years later, the Mondays still don't end. But you get used to it. Heck, it's
Monday right now! And I have 10,000 times more issues than I ever had at a corporate
job . But over time the problems that used to be hard get easier. And the problems that
you have today become opportunities. And the opportunities get better and better
because you learn which ones smell, taste, look, feel better. And it's no longer two
steps forward three steps back. It's five steps zig-zagged. And one of these days I'll

reach the end of the maze and a unicorn will be there. And I'll ride her away and never
look back.

How do you tell people who you think will never get funded that
you think this is the case? @vinaeco
You are a good friend for wanting to guide your entrepreneurial friend in the
right direction. But don't forget that it's his life, his ideas, his dreams. There's a way to
tell him that doesn't step over boundaries but you also have to be very careful not to
ruin your friendship. Try to keep the love, and it is love when you want to save him
from financial ruin, time ruin, emotional ruin - and try to keep the discussion as honest
and gentle as possible.
I say, "that sounds like a bad idea. Here's why." And I give not a criticism but a
constructive criticism.
I find I get unconstructive criticism a lot. Which is fine. People can say whatever
they want. But I often get letters that sound something like, "I don't usually like your
stuff but this time I did." Or..."I don't usually agree with you but I like this one thing
you said." Why do people want to tell me (or tell themsleves) that they usually don't
like me BUT. People like to know that they are safe inside. That nothing has moved
them. "I'm usually normal but every now and then I..." take a naked swim in a public
pool.
It's the same thing when criticizing an idea. Most people like to be critics. They
think they aren't smart unless they are criticizing. So that makes most people bad critics
since usually their criticism has no basis.
Don't say anything unless every word is dripping with value. "I don't like your
idea because..." you have no plan for getting users, OR...the product is going to be too
expensive and you can't raise money...OR it's been done before by X, Y and Z
companies... OR your valuation is too high - don't be a pig. This way you have given
him what you feel is a roadmap for success. He may agree with you. Or he may not.
That is his business and not yours.

Don't say something useless like, "Google can easily do it." Duh. Google can do
anything. But they won't. Google has done nothing except search well (ahh, Gmail also
but a lot of people have done email. And I do admit I'm typing this into Google Docs on
a Google Chrome browser right now. Ugh, I guess they can do your product. But they
aren't going to do a dating service. Or a car. Well, a car they will do. But maybe you
can do a better car but you won't get funding for that).
Be constructive and really help. In order to do that you have to dig deep. Your
friend has put a lot of thought into his idea. You won't put the same amount of thought
in, but you owe it to him to dig deep to come up with an answer. Or don't respond at
all. Silence is golden.

HEALTH
Do you ever get sick? @jasontoheal
I do get sick. But I haven't in about three years. Here's how I get sick. It's a tried
and true formula and it works every time.
I sleep for less than six hours for three days in a row.
I drink every night
I eat heavy dinners every night
I meet with a lot of people that I have to impress. This means I always have to
be "on", which is hard for me.
I don't take time to rest. I'm always going to meetings or working on things.

Then, on day three or four, I'll get sick.

If I don't do any of the above, I never get sick.

So many Americans are so overweight... are they trying to become

too big to fail? @toddrockoff
When I was a kid I used to eat, every day, an entire loaf of Wonder Bread for
lunch. I loved it. Then I'd go home and eat two bagels. Then for breakfast I'd eat about
6 bowls of cereal while I waited for two more bagels to be heated up in the oven. I
loved bread. Give me a twinkie. Give me two.
And over the years two things happened. Bread as we know it evolved. It
became mutant bread. In order to feed a world that has gone from 3 billion people to
seven billion people our food has become more and more genetically modified. More
and more processed to increase the yield. Nothing wrong with this. This is how the
world can survive. Advances in technology have proven the doom and gloom
Malthusians of the early 1970s dead wrong. And will continue to do so as the planet

becomes more interconnected through both technology, lower trade barriers, less
violence (see below book reference) and less corruption.
And yet... And yet.
Bread, and the wheat it comes from, is worse for your metabolism than ever
before.
And one other very horrible thing has happened.
Todd: you and I have become older. I can't eat two bagels anymore. Even oldschool bagels. I can't eat that foot high Carnegie Deli sandwich anymore. I can't even
eat three meals a day anymore without gaining weight. For awhile I had a physical
trainer that I would meet at the gym three days a week. He would take one look at me
and tell me what I had for dinner the night before and breakfast that morning. He was
that good. He was very funny. He'd go on these vacations and he knew exactly what
look he wanted to have and what he needed to work on. If he needed to work on his 8pack he would do one routine. If he needed his shoulders a little broader he'd eat
chicken and lift weights. If he needed more tone in his neck muscles, he'd eat
something else and do some other kind of routine. His goal: to look like a god when the
girls saw him walking down the street.
He'd get back into town with a camera filled with photos. Photos of the different
girls he... Well. Let's leave it at "he". We would spend half that first session after his
returns just checking on the photos. One time Claudia interrupted us by surprise and he
had to quickly put the camera down and we both felt a little guilty. Claudia was
laughing hysterically when I later told her why. "Do guys always do that?" she asked.
Yes, Claudia. Yes we do.
I don't lift weights. Or drink protein shakes. Or eat the just right amount of
chicken to make my shoulder chiseled. But I did have to make changes to my diet to
avoid becoming overweight, and to even lose pounds once I realized the slippery slide I
had already found myself on. And this will continue for the simple good reason that
food is genetically evolving and getting more and more processed in order to feed a
developing world filled with billions more people. That will continue for the rest of our
lifetimes.
But here in America we have to be particularly careful. Because, quietly, 90% of
the grocery store is filled with wheat and other carbs. Americans eat carbs for

breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks, and drink it down with sugar-filled alcohol. And
they eat late at night which hurts digestion because it's harder to digest when you are
lying down inert.
I'll tell you my current diet. Then I have a reading list related to it.
Breakfast: around 10am. I eat oatmeal with nuts crushed up in it (but NOT
peanuts) or I'll eat scrambled eggs. Nothing else. The oatmeal is Gluten free, whole
grain steal cut oats. The brand is "Bob's Red mill". Mixed with bananas and finely
crushed nuts (Brazil nuts, cashews, pecans, almonds - all raw). VERY finely crushed.
Lunch/Dinner: around 2-3pm. Usually some sort of vegetable curry or steamed
vegetables and some sort of fish. Sometimes I skip the fish (usually sole, perhaps
almond-crusted). And that's it.
Saturday: cheat day. You can eat anything. The reasoning described below.
Here's a reading list for what I describe above:
Macro issues:
Abundance, by Stephen Kotler. Describes how food has ALWAYS been genetically
modified but now it's increasing for good reasons in order to feed people through
better and better technological improvements.
The Better Angels of our Nature</strong>, by Stephen Pinker. Describes how
violence as a percentage of the human race, has declined every century. This
foretells an ever-increasing population where more and more adjustments to
how food is farmed (and water cleaned) will have to be made.
Food issues:
Wheat Belly by William Davis. Describes how bad wheat is for us. Particularly
wheat as it is processed today. Essentially recommending a zero wheat diet.
Paleo Comfort Foods by Julie Mayfield. A bit richer than the diet I described
above but what the heck.
The Four Hour Body by Tim Ferris with some adjustments. He recommends a
somewhat paleo diet and his book describes why the "cheat day" is important.

But I do several adjustments from his recommended diet: I won't do wine. I

won't do black beans. I eat fruit (the bananas in the oatmeal for instance and
sometimes we do other fruits in the oatmeal or during the day). He doesn't
specify what oils he uses when he cooks but we only use coconut oil as opposed
to corn oil and vegetable oil. If we use another oil it will be safflower oil. He
explains that the "cheat day" is to shock the system. Maybe that's true. I think
it's to serve as a painful reminder what happens to your body when you succumb
to it's food lusts.
Here's a link on the benefits</a> of coconut oil.
http://www.organicfacts.net/organic-oils/organic-coconut-oil/health-benefits-ofcoconut-oil.html
So Americans are becoming too big to fail, only because we are developing the
technology and methods to feed an increasingly hungry and growing planet. But we
have to make sure we balance it off by eating healthier while we feed the world.

Do you consider marijuana a dangerous drug? @TheBJJMind

Falling in obsessive love releases various chemicals in the body. And when the
girl breaks up with me it means I'm going to walk past her building a million times. It
means I might spy on her. It means I might wait for her to call. It means I might cry if
she doesn't.
I'll write her letters. I'll explain things to her. I'll buy her things. I'll do anything
to get her to smile.
Whatever that goddamn chemical is that is being released throughout my body
during those moments is the most dangerous drug I've ever tried.
After that: alcohol. Which makes you do things you know you shouldn't do and it
makes you like people you know you shouldn't like. That sounds pretty dangerous to
me.
After that: nicotine. Which gives you lung cancer, strokes, heart disease, and
other things that will kill you.

I haven't really tried any other drugs other than those and marijuana. Oh! LSD
once. Don't try it after the age of 25. Life is like LSD after that age.
So what has marijuana done for me? Pretty much nothing.
One time at a party I smoked so much I couldn't stop coughing and everyone
was laughing at me. I had to go into a private room at the party and just sit there while
I went back and forth between coughing and having this feeling that time was slowing
down just for me. I went to the party with a girl. She left with someone else. My friends
thought I was an idiot. I woke up the next morning on the lawn outside my apartment
and I spent the rest of the day trying to apologize to people who didn't think I did
anything wrong, they just thought I was stupid.
So that's the worst thing that's ever happened to me on that "dangerous" drug.
And I never had it again.
Oh wait, that's a lie. I had it once in 1999. I was invested in a company called
Gooey. They were an IM chat software that worked on web pages. So if you and I were
on the same web page, we would see each other and be able to IM with each other.
They got an offer from Star Media (remember them?) for $100 million. I owned 3% of
the company. I was on the board. I went up to their apartment (four Israelis in one
apartment) and they were all smoking marijuana so I joined them.
"Please sell the company to Star Media," I told them. "I will get you all hedged
up and you can pull cash out of the deal immediately."
One of them said, after taking his puff, "Who the fuck is Star Media? We are
GOOEY! We want Yahoo to buy us."
Six months later they were filing for bankruptcy.
So yes, it's a very dangerous drug.

You don't eat after 5pm - is this a form of intermittent fasting?

What changes to your diet, have you found beneficial and why?
@Anna__Power
On Saturday mornings I go to the local farmer's market and buy a loaf of Challah
bread. I love Challah bread. Jews talk constantly about constipation by the way.
Everyone thinks the cliche of a Jewish person is that they are good at money. I don't
know about that. I've lost all my money a few times and then some. But one cliche
which is true: thick, concrete, starchy constipation - and then talk about it with every
Jewish person you know. Usually over dinner.
After I buy that Challah bread, I eat it. The entire loaf. I can't stop myself. So
sweet and soft. It's like bread made out of clouds. I love it. I eat it. And then I suffer.
That's my one treat a week. The rest of the week I don't eat bread at all. I don't
eat sugar or sweets. I'm 44. I want to look good, feel good, sleep well, long, and most
importantly, when I eat something, I want to shit all of it out. At least the waste parts.
So here's what I do for now.
After 5pm (sometimes 6pm), I don't eat. And during the day I don't eat carbs or
sugars anymore (well, 2 sugars in my first cup of coffee for the day - I can't help it!).
Why do this:
Better for digestion. I know by the time I go to sleep (between 8 and 9pm) the
food will have worked it's way mostly through my digestive system. Imagine you
eat a big steak and then go to sleep. Where is that steak all night long? It's right
in the middle of your digestive tract, an entire part of a cow. And it doesn't
move. Your stomach rumbles, you feel nauseous, etc.
Better for sleep. For the reasons above. I like to keep things clear so at night my
body is focused on what it's supposed to be doing - sleeping! Insomnia is a
horrible illness that I don't like getting.
You lose weight. You can't help it.
Your face gets more angular. I've seen it happen. Not just with me. With
everyone on this pseudo-Paleo diet.

 Less pain. I used to wake up around 3 in the morning every night with pain in
my stomach. Either sharp pain or naeusea. I used to attribute it to stress. But
now I see it was because my eating habits were bad. It might've been the
starch, or the eating past 5pm, or the drinking. Who knows? I don't do any of
those anymore and I no longer wake up in pain.
You have more energy. On those Saturdays when I have the loaf of bread I go
into "Challah Coma". I can't function for about 3-5 hours afterwards. And I'm
even recovering the next day (like right now as I write this). I'm usually fully
recovered by Tuesday. I've become much more aware of my body because of
this diet and I can see how it changes and reacts to different foods.
You appreciate what you eat more. One yoga practitioner suggests this: imagine
your stomach as four fists. One fist is for food. The other for water, and two fists
for air. This particular yoga guy lived to over 100 and probably only died that
"young" because when he was 95 he fell and refused to have hip surgery. When
he was 89 he demonstrated 20 different kinds of headstands. He attributed his
long life to "good breathing". Claudia is doing a bunch of posts on Pranayama
("good breathing") on her website right now http://claudiayoga.com.
Less snacking. We all know that most diets don't work. The flip side is that
EVERY diet works. How can that contradiction be? Well, most people can't follow
a diet for more than a few weeks. But why does every diet work? Because there
isn't a single diet that lets you eat Cheez Doodles. if all you do is avoid junk food,
then you are fine. But extend out your definition of junk food. Over 80% of the
grocery store is carbs. Mmm, delicious starchy carbs, cookies, breads, snacks,
fried this, breaded that. Mmmmm. If you just do two things: no carbs, no eating
after 5pm, you'll get all the benefits of any diet you want.
What if you are invited to a dinner and you know there will be heavy eating,
drinking, etc. I go to those, but not too often because I know it will take me awhile to
recover. I don't drink alcohol at them (all sugar and I hate the taste) and I avoid the
dessert and appetizers and eat about half the entree. But it's still after 5pm. And I know
I'm going to sleep uncomfortably and be destroyed all the next day. As opposed to
tommorrow, where I will be feeling great.

Why and how did you stop drinking?

One time I was single and on a date. We went to some bar and I started
drinking. And drinking more. And drinking more. I was very funny. I had the bartender
laughing and refilling. I had everyone around me laughing. The girl I was with was
laughing. "You're so cute when you are drunk!"
About halfway through I remember staggering to the bathroom and the room
was spinning. When I came out of the bathroom I vaguely remember the girl kissing
someone else. I vaguely remember leaving the place and falling on the ground around
3rd avenue and 47th street at about two in the morning in the middle of the street.
Cars were honking and skidding around me. It was raining. I don't know why a car
didn't hit me. Someone, the girl maybe, pulled me off the street and onto the sidewalk.
We were all laughing while cars skidded around, avoiding me lying in the middle of a
busy Manhattan street. I vaguely remember getting to my hotel room. In the middle of
the night I felt sick and I vaguely remember vomit coming out of my mouth and
spraying all over the room and the bathroom.
In the morning, the room was still spinning. I saw the clock and I was two hours
late for a meeting. I went into the living room and the girl I had went out with the night
before was lying on the couch with her legs on the floor and her clothes half off. I left
her there. I got to my meeting, which was in progress but I was too sick to stay. I said
I had a stomach flu and everyone let me leave.
I was gaining weight. I couldn't sleep. I was getting depressed. Alcohol causes
all of these things. It also loosens inhibitions. When I was single I wanted my inhibitions
loosened. I vaguely remember drinking so I could get enough nerve to kiss someone.
Finally I met someone who didn't drink. And she was healthy. So I married her. That's
how I stopped.

How does one to be an early riser? Nothing has ever worked for
me. @JoshuaSheats
There is only one trick to getting up early: going to sleep early. We all feel like
we can't go to sleep early. We might miss something. Often night is the time we can
read. Or socialize. Or eat. Or drink. Or watch TV.

Well, stop all of those things. Don't eat a meal after 5 or 6pm. Don't watch TV
(what's good on TV anyway?). Don't socialize too much (do your friends need to see
you every night?). Don't drink - its both a depressant and filled with sugar and calories,
which will keep you up at night. Networking at night is ok, but you can't do it every
day. Maybe once a week.
The benefits of waking up early are enormous. You are able to focus better. Your
day will be filled with success by the time everone is just waking up.
You can read more. You can exercise. You can think. You can work and nobody
is up to bother you. You can meditate or pray. There's no temptation to drink or eat a
heavy meal. You can see the emptiness of where you live when the sun just peeks out
and lights it up. You can feel the freshness of the air. You can take a pad and after you
are done reading, you can write down ideas.
You might not want to do this. It doesn't work for everyone. But maybe try it.
And see what happens. Try to starting "going down" around 7:30 or 8pm. And by 9pm
you will be sleep, and by 5am you will have 8 hours of refreshing sleep. Try it. Will it kill
you?

INVESTING
What's your opinion on the easing of advertising restrictions on
hedge funds? It's like they're real businesses or something.
@mattybgame
There really shouldn't be advertising restrictions on any business. We're all
adults. We're all big boys. It's amazing how many people get scammed by hedge funds
every year despite all advertising restrictions. If there were no advertising restrictions
then, ironically, those scams would be revealed a lot sooner because a lot more people
would begin complaining early on. A free market is what protects people from scams
more quickly than government regulations.
Example scams: Almost every hedge fund. Most mutual funds. Most financial
services firms. Most food. Most over the counter and under the counter
pharmaceuticals. Most education. Most lawyers. Most accountants. Most of everything
basically.
But still we survive. Still we live. Still all the victims of Madoff got most of their
original money back. Still people move on to make more mistakes. more foolish
decisions, more misguided purchases, and more of everything. More, more, more, until
finally we die and leave it all behind. Advertising restrictions won't protect us from
death. Only turning more into less, greed into "enough", pleasure into contentment. We
should learn to restrict ourselves before we let the government restrict us.

If you had $100 to invest in self-education every month, where

would you allocate the money? @BenNesvig
You don't really need more than $100 a month to self-educate. Here is what I would
do:

 read biographies and books about any topics that interest you. Most books are
fairly cheap on Kindle or you can sit in bookstore cafes and read them.
draw and/or paint. This gets the neurons firing in areas that have been lying
dormant for awhile.
by cheap pads (waiter pads, for instance), and just free form write down ideas,
observations, thoughts of things you want to try.
go to a museum and try to find at least ten things you didn't know before that
excite you.
go to at least one networking event. Or dance class. Or something you never
would've thought of trying. Just one. Don't pressure yourself into suddenly doing
kickboxing ten times a week.
study yoga. And not just the physical exercises but the reasons behind each one.
The reason a move twists a certain way, breathes a certainway, the history of
that move throughout the history of yoga, the reasons for doing the physical
exercises.

As a 28 y/o graduate student, given the neg real return in savings

accounts, what areas would u suggest investing in?
@NotthatkindofDr
Only invest in yourself. There is nothing else that will get u more than 5% per
year.
When I first made some money I would wake up in the middle of the night
scared. What if Y2K caused the world to end? I had lunch one day with the head of IT
at a big Fortune 500 company. He said all his computers were going to shut down on
January 1, 2000. What would happen to my money. I would take long walks at four in
the morning calculating out how I can save my money in Y2K. I would compound things
20 years ahead to make sure I could pay for my then (one) kid, my family, myself.
Would I be able to retire? I would stand in the shower and wonder: what if I gave my
parents half my money? Would they be able to survive?

I had $15 million in cash at the time. About year or so later I had $0.
All of that time in the shower, compounding interest, worrying about Y2K or war
or inflation led to... $0. At $15 million I honestly thought I was poor. That somehow
inflation would outpace me. That people would be making salaries of $10 million a year.
Or that every entrepreneur would be richer than me. That I wouldn't be able to afford
the lifestyle I wanted. That my kids' kids would go broke. That I hadn't prepared
adequately for various scenarios that would bring down the financial system. So I
thrashed and invested and re-invested and doubled-down and spent, all in a desperate
quest to turn my mortality into immortality. There were moments when I thought I was
immortal, that money had somehow acquired for that elusive elixir of youth and vitality.
I was 32 years old. Just a baby. Just a little older than you are now.
Then I had nothing. I missed the one thing that was most important. I forgot to
invest in myself. This means lots of things.
Invest in your health. This has nothing to do with money. Are you eating ok? Are
you sleeping well? Are you flossing? Dental infections can go from the mouth to
the heart to the brain. There's some evidence that lack of flossing is directly
correlated to early onset of Alzheimer's. Are you exercising? Are you breathing
ok?
Invest in your friends. When I had money, I dropped my friends. I took on new
friends. Everyone spoke about money all the time. Alex would point out a
billionaire at a Las Vegas craps table who was surrounded by prostitutes and say,
"that guy is a stud". People who didn't make it in that world were "losers" or
"fuck ups". Nobody read. Nobody talked about anything but money. Everything
had a price tag. Everyone would put you down because of secret jealousy. And,
of course, nobody kept in touch with me after I lose all my money.
Invest in your ideas. Are you still coming up with ideas like you once did? I used
to come up with ideas for my business every day. New clients, new business
directions, new ideas for the clients, new ideas for employees, new ideas for how
we could get investors or acquirors. New ideas how to do things cheaply. Once I
sold the business I stopped having ideas. My idea muscle atrophied. I was an
immature little kid with a room filled with toys. All I wanted to do was play. It
wasn't until after I lost everything and lived through a year of excruciating
depression that I pulled out a waiter's pad and started coming up with ideas
again. And then it was another several years before I finally climbed out of a
total financial nightmare.

 Invest in your spirit. Two ways: Are you grateful for what you have. Don't always
think about investing in the future. Be grateful for everything you have right
now. Every day list the things you are grateful for. The second way: surrender.
You can't control everything. I should say, "I can't control everything". I can't
control what will happen with the world, with the economy, with the factors of
luck that helped me make the money. Surrender to whatever mystery is inside of
yourself that helped you get to this point. You can say, "there is no mystery".
But there is. It doesn't matter if you are a scientist, a religious person, a spiritual
person, or an entrepreneur, there's mystery in everything you touch. What
happened before the Big Bang? What exists in the space between a proton and
an electron inside the atom? What combination of molecules inside of us created
the consciousness that allowed you to make money. Bow down to the mystery
and trust it.
When you do the above four things your body, mind, emotions, spirit, will tap
into the pulses and vibrations of everything around you. Your mind will be an idea
machine. Your spirit will be free from the worries of the future and anxieties of the past.
Your emotions won't be sidetracked by the negative people who try to bring you down.
And your body will have the energy to pursue any idea to its fullest. You'll also know
the most important thing: when nothing is the right thing to do. Sometimes the best
investment is waiting. Is decreasing. Is slowing down. Is observing.
When I was just starting my first business I met with Jason Calacanis. He was
starting his first business, the Silicon Alley Reporter. I loved his magazine. It reported
on all the web agencies in the so-called "Silicon Alley". In other words, all my friends
that worked in a 10 block radius of where I worked. I was an advertiser in the
magazine. At the time, Joanne Wilson (Fred Wilson's wife) was the head of advertising
for his magazine.
Jason and I met for coffee. He was reeling off fact after fact about every
Internet business out there. There barely was an Internet industry and he knew the
entire universe of it. I said to him, "why are you doing this magazine? You should be
working for a top venture capitalist. You can help invest in all of these companies."
He said, "I only want to invest in myself. That's where the best returns will be."
Silicon Alley Reporter didn't quite work out. But his next business, Weblogs, Inc. he sold
to AOL for about $20 million and his latest business, Mahalo, raised money at a $100
million valuation. It's hard to get returns like that investing in anything other than
yourself.

And it's not just money. When I was burnt out and really needed a break from
everything I thought I was "supposed" to be doing I decided to start writing this blog.
There was zero investment in dollars. If anything, it kept me from foolishly investing in
a volatile stock market. It slowed me down. It forced me to think. To write. To relate to
people. To communicate with people. To make new friends. To open up new
possibilities for myself.
I've made many investments that have made me a lot of money. Writing on this
blog has made me zero money.
It's the best investment I've ever made.

Your dow 40k call...what's that in "real" terms? @tpavlik

A couple of comments. In the past 10 years I've made lots of predictions based
on analysis of the markets. I've published those in places ranging from the Wall Street
Journal to Forbes to thestreet.com and probably a dozen other places. Most of them
have turned out pretty good. I try not to do it too much anymore for several reasons.
1) People will always hate you no matter what. Whether you win or lose, someone
lost money. And they hate you.
2) The stock market, in general, is for suckers.
3) People ALWAYS forget my good calls. The stocks that go from $1 to $30 and
then get bought out. And there are plenty of those.
4) I lost interest. In general, Wall Street is crooked and I don't like having anything
to do with it. Having had everything to do with it for years. Heck, I practically
applied to work for Bernie Madoff.
5) I really love the direction my writing is now going. And it's far away from stocks.
6) I get constant hatemail about stocks. Or I see random lies about me on message
boards. I really can't stand it after ten years. You'd think I get used to people
calling me an "ugly creep" but it just never gets better.

So, back to your question. I assume it is somewhat sarcastic or negative towards

me for a few reasons. For one thing, I never made a prediction for Dow 40,000. I made
a prediction for Dow 20,000. Second, you ask in "real" terms. I only made the
prediction a year ago. So inflation's been about 2%. If you look at housing prices
(instead of rentals, which is what the inflation index is usually composed of) there's
actually been deflation. So I'm not sure what point is being made with the word "real".
I predicted Dow 20,000 for the end of 2013. My guess is we won't get to Dow
20,000 by the end of 2013. Growth has been slower than I thought.
Does that mean that everyone who followed my prediction was a loser and lost
money. Does it make me a loser?
When I made the prediction, the Dow was at 12,470. Right now the Dow is at
13,560. So 8.7% higher. Nobody is losing money. Around the same time I also said on
CNBC that AAPL was a strong buy and would be the first trillion-dollar company. It was
at 350 then. It's at 700 now. About a 100% return. A few months earlier, I had also
predicted that a stock, INHX, then at $1.80, would go higher. It got sold a year later at
$26. About a 1400% return. Everyone who followed the advice is making money. You
can't really ask for better. There are no prophets on Wall Street.

What is your take on Jim Cramer? Genius investor or mostly got

lucky, ie right place right time? @MattKelmon
I have one rule: I never say anything bad about someone who has been good to
me and has made me money. Cramer has been very good to me and I owe a lot to
him.
Here are ten things I learned from Jim Cramer.
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/01/10-things-i-learned-working-with-jim-cramer/
He gets a lot of heat for his stock picks. For acting the way he does on TV. But
you have to keep two things in mind: nobody can make money picking new stocks
every day of the year. And, number two, he's an entertainer, and a very good one. The
best on CNBC. The best in business. He's like the Rodney Dangerfield of finance. And
number three, judge not lest ye be judged.

So don't think of him as a great investor, or a lucky guy (he's started at least 3-4
successful businesses so that takes more than luck), or even a PT Barnum. I take him
for his word: he is an entertainer. And a very good one.

Did you ever blow a bunch of money in the forex market and
decide never again like Cramer? @CycleViewCharts
Let me tell you something and<strong> listen very close.</strong> Ask yourself:
who makes money in the markets? Who? I honestly have never met anyone who made
millions trading on their own. Never. Zero. Everyone I know who has made millions
trading did this:
they had a fund so they were able to charge fees. If you get 20% of the profits
off of $100 million dollars invested and your fund returns 10% then you just
made $2 million from trading the markets even if you had no money at risk and
even if you "just" returned what the market returned that year.
they cheated
they built and sold a company (or IPOed it) and held onto the stock for a really
long time while the stock went up
they built software to trade faster than the software next to them so they can
make a trillion trades a second and steal a 1/10 of a penny from you on every
trade.
[See, Who Makes Money on Wall Street"
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/03/who-makes-money-on-wall-street/]
Every market in the world returns somewhere between -20% and +20% a year
on average and usually more like 5-10%. You can't return 1000% a year consistently,
which is what it takes to make a living from scratch in the markets. You just can't do it.
You need other people's money. You need to charge fees. You need to hustle and sell
and sneak around.

Now you ask about forex, and I'll also throw in oil, commodities, gold, options.
Other than options, who are the biggest players in all of those other markets. Foreign
governments. It suddenly becomes YOU versus the collusion insider trading of the
central bankers of Russia, China, Japan, the UK, and the US. Who will win? Will you
beat them? Or will they beat you? Who should I place my bet on? Particularly if you
don't have a ten year track record beating them.
Almost everyone I know has lost not just a little bit of their money in these
markets but ALL of their money in these markets. I hope I don't add you to the list.

Facebook has an extremely uncertain future, with the outcome

teetering from good extremes to bad ones. How does it end?
@JStuartTweets
Only the headlines say Facebook has an uncertain future. The headlines also said
Fukishama radiation was going to hit San Francisco within days of the tsunami. The
headlines also said Avian Flu was going to wipe out the world, or at least be a major
epidemic? Well, where is Avian Flu?
And where are the apologies? How come the people who write the headlines
never apologize when they are wrong? Thousands of people in San Francisco and the
rest of Japan were scared to death because of the headlines created after the tsunami?
Where are the apologies to those people? Where is Swine Flu? Where are the weapons
of mass destruction?
Ok, and now people are saying a company with a billion addicted users that is
also the website that people spend the most time on (compared with a billion other
websites) is "teetering" on self-destruction.
I'll tell you from my perspective. Not only do I spend a lot of time on Facebook
but I advertise on Facebook and I am an advisor or investor in several social media
agencies that focus on Facebook and I was also an investor in the largest social media
agency. http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/06/how-to-make-a-billion-dollarcompany-from-scratch/

Facebook is an enormous success and is going to continue to be. I am seeing

them unveil new sources of revenue on a weekly basis. Do you notice the ad that is
now there on the login page? It wasn't there last week. Or the fact that brand pages
with over 100,000 fans can now promote specific posts. That's about a month old. Or
the fact that there will be realtime bidding on Facebook ad units. That was mentioned
on the conference call but I don't think has been released yet. And then there's mobile.
Facebook is not going anywhere.
But I still see people saying "Mark Zuckerberg is not ready to be a CEO". Are you
kidding me? How many users did he build the site up to? Has anyone else ever done
that in the history of the planet Earth? Let's look at his latest achievement. The IPO.
People say the IPO was a failure. Very funny. He raised the great amount of money at
the highest possible amount, with the lowest dilution, and paid a lower percentage of
fees to Wall Street than any IPO before him. That's a pretty amazing success. If you
bought the IPO for a quick flip, sorry. You lost. But if you bought for the long run,
you're going to be a big winner. Even bigger if you buy now.

What industries/fields do you feel have the most growth potential

in 5 year horizon? @Vic5557
I am going to write more about this on stock-related websites but the industries
and companies that I think will do the best in the next five to fifteen years are:
1) Fracking. Most people are worried about fracking as a pollutant. But the latest
technologies in fracking have solved just about every issue conceivable. It turns
out that the United States probably has more oil left than Saudi Arabia and we
are at inning one in drilling for it thanks to this year's advances in fracking
technology. This is how you solve an energy crisis. You reduce dependence on
the Middle East where we are constantly fighting wars and worried about
terrorism. You increase the supply of oil so it gets dirt cheap. And wealth comes
to the country so you can focus on spending it on sustainable energy solutions.
Fracking will do this.
2) Diagnostics of Age-related diseases. The baby boomers are retiring now at a rate
of tens of millions a year. Economists complain (what else do they do?) that the
"job participation rate" is going down because people have given up. That's not
the reason. It's because baby boomers are retiring. And what happens after they
retire? They get cancer, Alzheimers, Parkinson's, heart disease, and other age-

related diseases.
The best cure is prevention. Companies are spending billions on developing drugs that
cure these various diseases. But more important than finding the cure is finding the
disease. Being able to prevent a disease before it starts is the key to a long life. So
diagnostics companies will massively succeed. The best innovations in this space are in
personalized medicine, genomics, etc and there are new technologies being developed
successfully every year. This will be a huge boom.
3) Social media marketing. When you advertise on the Super Bowl, you spend
millions, hit 100 million people, and then have no way of every communicating
with that customer again, or knowing how well your ad did. When you advertise
on Facebook, you can reach out to a billion people, you get a customer that you
know everything about, and you can continue to communicate that customer for
free for the rest of their lives. Again, we are at inning one of people using social
media (combined with mobile) to reach out and touch the people who we can
really help ("advertising" will fade into "helping"). The social media agencies that
were at the forefront have been bought
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/06/how-to-make-a-billion-dollar-companyfrom-scratch/. So inning zero is over. But inning one is just beginning.

Is the stock market "rigged"? I have heard floor traders called

"Market Makers". Also heard that everything involving $ is rigged
@granthuhn
If you have to ask the question, then, yes, the market is rigged. And all the
people who are rigging the market will tell you it isn't. There's a saying in poker, "if you
can't spot the fish at the table, then you're the fish." Guess what? In this very case, you
are the fish.
The same thing is true with the market. You are asking about "floor traders
called Market Makers". That question alone means you are the fish. Do not put a dime
of your money into the market if you want to save any of it. Unless you want to hold for
the long run and pray for the best (ultimately the market is rigged to go higher in the
long run but in the short run the market is rigged to take all of your money).

So, yes, Virginia, the market is rigged. The funny thing is: the people who think
they are rigging the market are themselves subject to the people who are rigging it
above them. There's about 20 layers of rigging. The guys at the top are very happy if
they avoid going to jail. They have done the rigging and made billions. Sometimes they
retire and build great art collections. Other times they go to jail when someone in the
government decides they've had enough of them.
Don't be angry it's rigged. It always has been. Every exchange in the planet has
always been rigged. Our market is better than most. Don't try to find happiness or
sadness in the market because you'll find neither. Even if everything around you is
rigged doesn't mean you can't enjoy watching the sun rise in the morning.
[See also, "Who Really Makes Money on Wall Street?"
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/03/who-makes-money-on-wall-street/]

UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

If you were born in another country would you move to US?
@danieltoba
Here's the twist: If I were born outside of the US, I'd move to the US. If I were
born in the US. I'd move out of the US.
How come? If I were born outside the US, chances are I'm going to find more
opportunities to work at startups, to make money, to create things, to get funding, to
live in wide-open, clean spaces, to create the life I want to create, than I could in my
own country. This isn't always true but mostly true.
If I were born inside the US, I'm just like everyone else. I'd learn what I can
here, about all the things the US is good at. I'd try to accumulate some money, I'd do
what I can to make a dent in life here. And then I'd move some place where I can take
that experience and money and make an even bigger dent. I have kids so I would not
do this at this point but I had my total choice I'd probably move to India at this point,
where the pace of life is a little bit different, US money goes a long way, and I'd have
many experiences utterly different than I've had for the first 44 years of my life.

VACATION / TRAVEL
What do you do when you know you need a vacation, but don't
have the slightest clue as to how to best spend the time?
@thecrint
Perfect! Take a "staycation".
Read
Sit and do nothing
Find something athletic local in the area to do
Sit in cafes and come up with ideas on my waiter's pad for things I never had the
time to come up with ideas for before.
Go to a local museum and then sit in the cafe/bookstore and come up with
ideas.
Sit and do nothing again.
11am! I used to do this "web show" for HBO called "3am" where I would
interview people about what they were up to at 3 in the morning on, say, a
Wednesday night. Nobody was up to anything good at 3am on a Wednesday
night. I used to think that was the witching hour where all interesting things
happened. I was wrong. You know what hour is even better? 11am. Because at
11am, who is walking around? They should be at work, or at school, and it's too
late for that mid-morning break, and it's too early for lunch, and even if you
worked in the restaurant business you are already at work by 11am.
So go to a part of your town that you have barely spent any time and watch the
people walking around at 11am. It will be mysterious and dangerous. Give them stories.
Find out their stories. Observe them. Draw them. Just relax.

In our daily lives we only perceive a small window of our universe. The benefits
of a staycation:
1) you see a larger part of your universe. You notice the tiny details that have
always escaped you. You appreciate the small things in the lusciousness of the
life around you.
2) you don't waste time in the traveling. Think of the 30 hours or so you save not
having to pack, get on planes, travel, settle in, etc. It's 30 hours no matter
where you are going. What a drag!
3) it's cheap.
If you have any other staycation ideas, write me. Enjoy!

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT / LIFE

What's the quickest way to become famous? @bhawks4life
The quickest way to become famous is to spend 20 years working really really
hard for it. And I'm not saying this from experience. Just saying this from observation.
Here's what you do during those 20 years.
1) Know every aspect of the history of the area you want to be famous in.
2) Understand how every new idea in your industry was developed.
3) Completely dominate more than one industry. So you can combine ideas in the
intersection of all the industries you are interested in.
4) Do the Daily Practice of improving physically, emotionally, mentally, and
spiritually. This allows you to be a complete transmitter from the universe into
your area of interest. It allows you to become an idea machine. To become the
physical vehicle by which change can be channeled. Use tdp.me to chart your
progress.
5) Once your idea muscle is developed enough start sharing those ideas with a
community. Write for websites, comment on blogs, talk on twitter, answer
questions on quora, speak at conferences, write a book, post on Pinterest, build
a group on Facebook, make an email newsletter, consult for people, coach
people, and so on.
6) Respond as much as you can to the people in your community who reach out to
you. Every person you touch becomes a new node on your network. The more
nodes on your network, the more the value of the network increases
exponentially. Introduce different nodes. Becomethe Source.
One time I was playing poker in Atlantic City. Right next to me was a guy named Joe
who was a very good poker player. The best I ever played against. A new guy came to
the table. But he only had cash and he needed to get chips. Illegally(this is illegal in
Atlantic City), Joe said, "don't worry about that, I'll sell you some of my chips" and he

did. Later Joe told me, "always be the bank at your table. Then the other players like
you and don't want to bet against you even if they are pretty sure you are bluffing."
Always be the bank. Of ideas, connections, resources, everything.
7) Continue to do A-F. Your network grows exponentially. While I was writing this I
was thinking of everyone from Steve Jobs to Bobby Fischer to Cyndi Lauper,
Orson Scott Card, Eckhart Tolle, and on and on. I watched how each of these
people went from studying the history of their field, to developing new ideas that
pushed the field, to networking, to responding, to ultimately seeing their network
hit a tipping point. I feel your question was a bit facetious but this answer is
basically my analysis of those careers. Do it.

Was scammed by Tim Roberts of Savtira, lost small fortune 2 wks

before their bogus bankruptcy. Who do I turn to? DA, SEC, FBI?
@TommyOphotos
One time someone I knew fell and broke her leg in a Macy's. She spent the next
five years suing Macy's and hoping the settlement would be enough to satisfy her
financial needs forever. So for five years she was always complaining about her leg. She
couldn't let her leg get better or else her entire wish for financial safety would have no
merit. She became obsessed with the details of her case and was always on the phone
with lawyers. Any guidance I would try to give her would be blocked by her friends,
"Don't say that! She's worked hard for this. She's depending on that settlement".
She lost the case. No money.
Don't be that person. You were scammed. You're a big boy. Now you know.
Don't turn to anyone. Don't count on getting that money back. Don't live your life angry
and with regret.
When I lost all my money in 2000, people close to me suggested I sue my
stockbroker, who is still a good friend of mine. There was no way I was going to sue
him. I made every decision. I had only myself to blame. I don't care if suing him
would've gotten my money back. Not suing him taught me to take responsibility for my
own actions, to move forwards instead of backwards, to focus on ideas and creativity
and growth instead of looking backwards constantly at regret and remorse.

You tell me what the better way to live life is? And when you make that money
again, it will be the sweetest revenge. And you will. But not from the FBI. I don't think
the FBI is the way to get rich.
Remember: It's Your Fault. http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/05/its-yourfault/

When trying to get what you want, how do you manage the
tension between being nice/rational/reasonable and a complete
lunatic? @wkarmistead
Only idiots listen to a lunatic. Your goal with everyone you meet is to listen to
them. They are human beings. They have something important to say. To tell you.
They have been bottled up for so long, so frustrated, so miserable, that when someone
turns an ear towards them they will talk, they will freely confide in you, and eventually
the will listen to you.
This is because you are nice and rational and reasonable. Not a lunatic like the
rest of society. You have something you want to sell. Listen first to see if they need it.
Listen first to see what they need and how you can help.
Then help them. That's how you get what you want. The riches will never stop
flowing if you consistently do this.
That's not lunacy. It's the ultimate in sanity.

What are your thoughts on hunting...and in general being self

sufficient w/ regards to your food? @templec4
I had coffee this morning. Probably some migrant labor in South America picked
the coffee beans I used and laborers lifted boxes of coffee and put them onships and
sent them over here. I'm using a computer that was probably made in Foxconn, the

factory company in China none for suicides of it's workers. Yesterday afternoon I ate a
steak, which was presumably killed by either a hunter or a slaughterhouse. I'm sure I've
got some leather on the sneakers I'm wearing. Which I guess (I don't even know)
somehow comes from skinning a cow.
You get the idea.
There's two things:
1) Ultimately it's a waste of my resources for me to be self-sufficient and gather all
of these things for myself. I'm not going to go pick and grow my coffee beans.
I'm not going to make my computer. And I'm not going to slaughter cows. But I
depend on thousands of people every day to do these things and more for me.
2) 2) Perhaps I can grow a few vegetables and be self-sufficient as regards those
vegetables. But I'm only fooling myself if I think that handles more than 1%of
the things that I would truly need to do in order to become self-sufficient. In a
modern world where trade is not only global but permeates almost every aspect
of how we live (where does the oil in my car come from? Where do the
ingredients of my kid's medicines come from. Or the pages in a book?) there is
zero chance of being self-sufficient.
The best way I can redefine self-sufficient is to reduce your physical, emotional,
mental, and spiritual needs as much as possible. Become happy with who you are. Be
more appreciative of what you have now in the present. Be thankful we live in a world
that largely provides enormous wealth regardless of where we are in the income strata.
Be present as much as possible instead of worrying about the entire world. The world
will get better and healthier if we as individuals get better and healthier.
The "bad" people are the ones who desire too much or fear too much. So you
should desire less and fear less and you can hopefully become a mirror to those who
take advantage of the riches the world has to offer.

How do you get out of your own way and make things happen?
@happyinspirit
I was an idiot. At least in retrospect. For almost every event in my life I've gotten
in my own way. I'd be offered a job and I would think, "no, I can't take this job until

I've published my first novel." Or I would make a lot of money and I'd think,"no, this
money is not enough until I have one hundred million in the bank," or I'd be in a
relationship and I'd think, "no this relationship is no good unless we are spending ever
moment together". Or sometimes I would pitch my services and then when they said
"yes", I would think, "but I don't want this anymore!" and I'd have to figure out how to
get out of it.
What an idiot. Always.
So I've taken all these experiences and put them in a test tube. I heated the test
tube up and watch two noxious gasses come out of it that identified the two
fundamental chemical reactions that occurred during every time I got in my own way.
1) The Past. I'd be worried about the past. I'd be worried that I was going to go
broke, like I three times/four times/infinite times did before, unless A, B, and C
happened. I'd get scared. I'd make decisions out of fear. Or anger or regret.
2) The Future. I'd be anxious about the future. I'd think, "unless I had one hundred
million I won't be as famous, rich, successful, as thisother person. Or..eventually
I will go broke unless I do this. Or...I won't be able to feed my family or I won't
be popular or or or...something. SOmething that will happen in the future that
has no basis in reality now.
I'm thinking of a specific event that your question reminds me of. I had just
started a new company in early 2000. I was eating in a restaurant in Chinatown and I
got a call from one of my partners. I stepped outside and it was raining. He said to me
on the phone, "get ready. We're going to make one hundred million dollars on this."
And I was smiling. My chest swelled up with ego. I remember thinking, "now, finally,
nothing can hurt me." And almost everything that happened afterward hurt me:
relationships, friendships, businesses failing, until I had gotten so in my way I had none
of the above, including no money, and lost my house, and lost everything.
Why didn't I just say, "I have enough right now." Enjoy the rain. Enjoy the
dinner in my family. Cultivate my friendships. Maybe start writing the things that would
give me pleasure.
But I didn't. I got in my way by being burned somehow in my past and being
terrified for no reason about the future.

The only way to avoid getting in your way in the future is to be aware of yourself
right now in the present. Don't forget every day to be grateful for the things you have.
Be grateful you worked hard for what you have. Surrender to everything around you
that you can't control. Don't overthink the future or overanalyze the past. People hurt
you. There are potential things to be afraid of.
But not right now this second. Take at least half this second to enjoy what you
have. Take the other half to feel the different parts of your body and think, "I am
here". Listen to the sounds you can hear right now. Listen to the silences in between
those sounds. Make it a practice to do that as much as possible. Then your mind will be
rewired slowly to never get in it's own way. And the time machine will gather dust in
the closet, never to be used again.

How do you advise someone to mentally cope with/ move past

being unattractive, hating permanent features of the way you
look? @AtsalPeter
When I was 16 it would hurt me to walk past a mirror. Physically hurt me, I'd
almost fall backwards if I suddenly realized a mirror was too close. I had wild, tangly
hair when all the "cool kids" had straight blonde hair. I had big dorky glasses. I had
acne and cysts all over my face. Big purple blotches. Once a month I'd go to the
dermatologist where she would drain all the pus out of the cysts, leaving them even
more purple and patches of blood and damage all over my face.
I had braces with rubber bands criss-crossing all over my mouth. I had no idea
how to dress in any situation. One person once asked me "why are you always wearing
corduroy pants" in the middle of July. I was clumsy in gym class. And, to top it off, I
had the distinct impression my head was bigger than everyone else's. When I rode my
bike down the block occasionally the other kids would scream out the window, "Hey
Moose!" and I'd hear their laughing as I sped up as quickly as I could to escape.
I would take my glasses off and back away from the mirror until I thought, in the
blur that I saw, that I looked halfway decent. I'd usually end up about twenty feet
away.

One time in chemistry class I heard two girls talking, "how can his acne be that
bad?" And look at me while I pretended to look away. Another person told me, "you
need to smile more. That's the best you can do." One time I called a friend of mine
and asked, "am I just never going to get a girlfriend?" We were in tenth grade. He said,
"maybe in college or after college you can." At that age even a week seemed like an
eternity. I couldn't wait for college.
One time I spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to get out the knots in my
hair. Then I sat down to eat breakfdast. One of my parents came in and looked at me
and yelled, "you're disgusting!" Then I went to school.
Even now, when I make an appearance on, say, CNBC, there are more
comments afterwards about how I look than about anything I had to say. I never really
understand it. When I went on online dating services I wouldn't put my picture.
Fortunately Claudia responded and asked why I didn't put my picture and I had a ready
excuse that sounded impressive, "because I go on TV a lot and didn't want anyone to
recognize me." Good thing she believed and maybe was impressed by that bullshit.
And it is true that better looking people get higher salaries, better opportunities,
more opportunities for sex, etc. That's just the way the world works.
But just because you look in a mirror, doesn't mean the mirror is showing you
the correct image. A large part of that image is how you interpret what you see. It
turns out almost everyone hates looking in the mirror. It turns out that personality and
confidence and optimism add a lot to one's looks. It turns out that being a good person
adds a lot to your attractiveness, particularly as you grow older. Experience also
engraves itself in your features and moves past the mishapenness of youth.
And, by the way, you never look as bad as you think you do.
Here's what you do the next time you wallow in your own self-hate. (Ugh, I'm
going to do it again:)
I'll change it a little: The Simple Daily Practice:
Do one thing to improve yourself physically today. A little exercise. A walk. Sleep
well. Eat well. Change one thing. Don't snack on junk food.
Be around positive people. Don't be around people who are going to judge your

looks.
Build your idea muscle. People are attracted other people with lots of ideas. The
people with lots ofideas will save the world. Those are attractivepeople to be
around.
Be grateful forwhat you do have. Surrender to what you can't control and know
that it's for the best. That in the long run other things will compensate if you get
good at not trying to change what you can't control.
Believe me, this works. Again and again.
[As an aside, it's interesting to read this post "What it's like to date a
supermodel to get some perspective on this. http://www.jamesaltucher.com/whats-itlike-to-date-a-super-model/]

Is cumulative/constant improvement the most important "thing"

in life? @JT_Beck
I wanted constant improvement. But I didn't know what it meant. I felt it meant
better money, better jobs, better women, better friends, more control over the aspects
of my life that I felt were out of control. I then felt I could "spend" in those area: have
bad relationships, experiment with things and in ways I shouldn't experiment, spend
where I shouldn't, and in general purge myself of the good will I created via "constant
improvement".
Now I think the opposite. The best way to have constant improvement is to
decrease constantly the things you feel the need to improve. Everything you want to
improve is something external. More money. Better athlete, better at public speaking,
better at writing. Perhaps I am just projecting these things and these are all the things
I want to improve. But to have a goal is to be constantly striving and building to
achieve that goal. And then once you achieve it, what's next? More goals? Less? Do you
roll down the mountain and get disappointed. or do you get disappointed there are
higher and higher goals to reach, never reaching the highest of all.

For me, better to sit, being happy and grateful with what's outside, but giving up
all goals on the inside. If you truly want for nothing, then all your goals and dreams will
be achieved.

Do you have a support group you meet regularly? are you willing
to come to ct to meet one? would be honored
I don't meet with any kind of support group BUT I am planning on doing a
weekend workshop at Kripalu which is sort of like a spiritual resort hotel.
Here's the link to the retreat: http://www.kripalu.org/program/view/AFPS131/the_daily_practice_awakening_the_full_power_of_spirit
Basically, everyone gets there Friday. There will be dinner (I think) and I'll give a
talk and some Q&A.
Then Saturday morning, Claudia will teach a basic yoga class which will include
some breathing/pranayama exercises.
Then I will give a talk about the relationship between entrepreneurship and
spirituality. Can one be spiritual, secular, and successful all at the same time?
A break at that point will include some worksheets to fill out. Then the afternoon
for Q and A and some discussion of the role of meditation in society. At night, a
discussion of meditation and the role of meditation (if there is any) in our society. Then
some silent time until the morning on Sunday.
Then Sunday, yoga and breathing again and a little bit of meditation. Then more
Q&A, group workshops, and talks from me.
I'm a bit nervous about it. I've given lots of talks before but haven't done the
weekend retreat thing. I'm looking forward to being a little out of my comfort zone and
seeing what happens.

What is the key to persistence? I try the daily practice but cannot
stay persistent and flake off after a few days. @adnanp
I think my "Daily Practice" post is usually too hard. For me also. Sometimes I'm
busy so I just can't do yoga that day. Or sometimes I let the negative people
overwhelm me. Or sometimes I find myself roiled in regrets and unable to be grateful
for what I have.
I've repeated the "second arrow" story before. When something bad happens to
you, it's as if an arrow hits you. It hurts. You're bleeding. But you'll recover. It's when
you then feel regret or remorse over what you've done that the second arrow hits you.
It's that second arrow that can kill you.
So first, avoid the second arrow. Don't feel bad that on your quest to improve
yourself, you slipped. It's only you. There are no judges out there on Mt. Olympus
saying, "Adnan, you have SLIPPED and FAILED! You must be PUNISHED!" Nothing of
the sort. Life is short, we get by as best we can, then we get absorbed back up to
where we came and report on what happened.
If you want to do the Daily Practice but find it difficult, no problem. Just cut it in
half. If that's difficult, cut it in half again. It's like Zeno's Paradox. As long as you keep
cutting in half, you will never hit the floor. Remove goals from your daily agenda.
Replace them by themes. The theme is that you don't hit the floor. You reduce
suffering.
Worst case: pick one category (physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual) and do
one simple goal from just ONE of those categories (write down two ideas instead of
ten). Now put an "X" on your calendar. You did it! Maybe tomorrow, or next week, or
next year, write down three ideas and don't drink alcohol. Or not. It's all up to you. The
second arrow has poison on it.

Is there a correlation between creativity and trying new things

(visiting new places, meeting different people, etc). @ivanhoff
Tomorrow is Labor Day and I assume I will be busy doing Labor Day things.
Then this week I'm going to try a new thing. I'm going to go to LA on Wednesday (after

three meetings on Tuesday, all exploring new things), and I'm going to go to a press
conference Amazon has invited me to attend on Thursday and then I'm going to spend
Friday coming home. Then a weekend with kids (doing new things), and a Monday at a
meeting and then dinner with some new people I'm doing business with.
Time for creativity: zero.
Perhaps new things will give me fuel to write. Will give me insight into ideas or
human nature that will form the basic building blocks that will create either a new
opportunity for myself or give me some new things to write about. I don't regret doing
new things. In fact, I am choosing to do them. I never do something I don't want to do.
(At least that is my mantra and I usually stick to it).
But time for creativity (again, as a reminder): zero.
If I spent this next week (since I just described a period of about eight days until
I am next able to really relax at home) thinking, reading, and writing, I'd probably be a
lot more creative. I have some talks to prepare (giving two talks in October, two in
November, a big weekend thing in January, and two talks next March), I'd get together
another book of material ("James Altucher's Guide to Parenting") and spend more time
thinking about the intersection between creativity and failure.
Which brings me to, what is creativity correlated with:
Time. Yesterday, on a Saturday right before Labor Day, what you would think
would be the slowest day of the year on the Internet, I tried an experiment. I've
been avoiding using LinkedIn for about five years or so. Or whenever it was
created. I don't know. 100 years ago. I let LinkedIn come in and peek through
my gmail, match it with all the email addresses that were related to LinkedIn
accounts, and sent out about 1030 LinkedIn requests. This was around 7am or
8am Saturday. Within an hour maybe 800 people had responded. (maybe
everyone had responded but the Internet has evolved into this gigantic beast
that never lets you know when people are saying "Heck NO, I don't want to be
friends with that guy"). So this tells me two things:
i) Why are we all on the Internet at 7am Saturday right before Labor Day. Aren't we
buying charcoal or fishing or something? No. Not me either. I was on the Internet from
7am to 2pm yesterday, and then on and off for the rest of the day after that.

ii) LinkedIn: why are you only looking at email accounts? Shouldn't you also be looking
at twitter and Facebook?
iii) I go back to my trading days. If everyone is doing something then perhaps the right
thing to do is the opposite.
Don't get me wrong: I love the Internet. I've been addicted to playing online
chess since pre-web. I've been addicted to newsgroups since 1987. I've been addicted
to reading other people's email accounts without their permission since about 1988.
Most of all, I don't know the people who live on my block. And thank god. One
woman with a tiny baby has the police regularly called on her whenever she and her
boyfriend get in a fight. My choices: become friends with her OR make another new,
positive, uplifiting connection, among the billions of people on the world wide web. It's
an easy choice and I make it every day. I love my friends who I've made on the
Internet. Part of the emotional component of what I call "the Daily Practice" involves
getting rid of the negative people in your life and adding in positive people. People who
will inspire you and uplift you. We used to be limited to the people who lived right near
us and grew up all of our lives with us. Then "moving" became possible and we became
limited by the people who lived near us and people who we worked with.
Now we are not limited at all. I just made 1000 LinkedIn connections yesterday.
Who knows which of those 1000 I will eventually become further friends with? There's
no limits? I can choose new positive people every day or interact with the friends on the
Internet I have already made. This, to me, is the cultural and universal success of the
Internet.
BUT.... I need to spend less time on it. This goes along with less time reading
news and less time socializing at night. Not that these activities are bad. But they do
get in the way of creativity.
Let's go back to the Bible for a second because it contains a metaphor for
creativity. Somewhere in there it says we are created in the image of God. Let's take a
scientific version of that and assume that the laws of the Universe apply at the macro
level and somewhat at the micro level. We are created in the image of the Universe.
The Universe was a ball of light (or something, we don't know) in some area before
time and space that was completely NOTHING. It was so much nothing we can't' define
it. And out of that was created stars, galaxies, quasars, pulsars, quarks, and LIFE. You
and me. The ultimate in creativity.

Applying that on the micro level, since we operate by the same laws the Universe
operates, it's clear what is correlated with creativity:
1) doing nothing. NOTHING. Give yourself time for that. I don't mean give yourself
time to think. I mean do NOTHING. Sit. Whatever. Walk.
2) Combine things. The next thing that happened in the universe was that
hydrogen started combining with itself to create new types of atoms. Ultimately,
the basics of life were created by combining helium atoms together (three equal
carbon) then combining the results of that together, then that together, and so
on. Sit down and list things that you know (which implies you should spend some
time reading in order to learn things - and reading will give you a lot more
learning than doing although doing helps also) and combine them. I KNOW that
facebook exists. I KNOW that companies, in general, do not know how to take
advantage of new technologies. So it's a slam dunk that a basic lifestyle business
one can create is to help companies figure out their Facebook presence.
I'm not saying that's a company everyone should start. But it is a method that can be
used for creativity. Combine two things that work (or that don't work - go for it!) and
see what the new thing that is created is. In the 1970s everyone was fascinated by
astronauts. People throughout history have been fascinated by mythology. And, we all
love a beautiful woman (men and women love beautiful women). So what was created:
"I Dream of Jeannie!" one of the most popular TV shows ever.
Creativity then is correlated with the lows of the Universe. How does the Universe
operate? Follow it and you will be able to create also. Your mind is like a mini-Universe.
Which brings me to one final thing creativity is correlated with. Cue broken record....
3) The Daily Practice. The Universe is healthy. It's expanding constantly (the Big
Implosion is most likely debunked). You need to be healthy also. And not just
physical health. But emotional healthy. Mental health (your idea muscle must be
exercised every day) and Spiritual health (cultivating a sense of surrender to
your current situation, feeling gratitude to the abundance both inside and outside
of you). Some people have said to me that in my original post on the topic I
suggested too many things for health. This is correct. I will have a follow up post
soon about this. Or in my newsletter.
I'm looking forward to doing new things this coming week. To seeing friends and
making new ones. To traveling to LA (I haven't been there in a billion years) and then

seeing my kids and then meeting with a new opportunity. But then I'm already looking
forward to 8 days from now when I can sit and do nothing. Bliss.

Interested in your take on advice to be yourself when seeking

leadership roles/new jobs. @taniahew
Everyone puts on a mask when they wake up in the morning. They have
different masks for different occasions. I have my father mask, my partner mask, my
lover mask, my friend mask. My work mask. Most of the time those masks wear down.
Over time, we become more comfortable being ourselves. On a first date we wear our
best clothes. We smile. We spend money. We ask questions and then we ask the
person to clarify. Six months later we are sitting around in our underwear watching
football on TV next to the girlfriends we reeled in. "What, honey? Did you say
something?"
Everyone does this. Or almost everyone.
You don't have to do it. When you are interviewing or taking a leadership
position or even going out on a date, imagine if you didn't put on a mask. Suddenly you
are standing out from 99% of the population.
You're first!
People who are good at what they do (even a potential spouse looking for a
mate in the wild) can spot the masks pretty easily. They aren't idiots. Nor do you want
to work for or be with an idiot.
You can choose to stand out from the 99% of the population. Say what you
mean. Say what you want to do. As I mentioned in the previous article
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/08/the-seven-habits-of-highly-effective-mediocrepeople/, I know I'm a poor judge of people. So when I meet someone I really want to
ask questions and try to learn something. I don't know about this person. I want to
learn who they are so I can form an opinion. Ask questions in your interview. Learn
more about them than they can learn about you. If you truly want to do well at a
company, learn more about the company during the interview. What other way is the

best way to learn about a company - you have an employee right there ready to answer
all of your questions.
You might think: wear the mask in the interview but then do well at the job. If
you can't do well being yourself at the interview then why would you want that job?
You want to be with people who like the real you, not the you who is good at wearing
masks.
Before my first date with Claudia she told me she was from Buenos Aires. Like an
idiot, I responded, "Oh, I've never been to Brazil!" I didn't know Buenos Aires was in
Argentina. Somehow she still agreed to go on a first date with me.
On the first date, I said to Claudia how when I was 13 years old I bought every
book on astral projection with the idea that I would fly around invisibly in order to see
other girls naked. That was my entire goal in life at that time although it never quite
worked the way the books said it would.
Somehow she agreed to go on a second date with me.
Now, over three years later, I'm sitting in my underwear typing this while she is
in some other room doing god knows what. Avoiding me probably. But I was myself all
the way through and now I'm happy.

How do you get past regret? I can't get past this and have been
wasting more compounding months and months.
@JohnPearson555
When the web first started I quickly became comfortable with all the
programming tools available to make websites. I had the tools in front of me to
program many different things: a search engine, a directory of my favorite links, a way
to post reviews of places, a way to post gossip about other people, and so on. Also
domain name registration was free at the time. "sex.com" was available as a domain at
the time. The guy in the office next door to mine created lycos.com, one of the first
billion dollar search engines (actually, the first). Another guy down the hall built
goto.com. Another guy built Wisewire, which he later sold to Lycos for $50 million.
What did I do? I played chess all day on the Internet. I put some of my short stories on

a little website. Blech! I had such a head start. There was a grand total of maybe 50
websites at the time, spread out over four or five universities. "I could've been a
contender".
What a thing to regret. At the beginning of an entire revolution and was I a
revolutionary? No, I did nothing. I was useless. Every now and then I still think about it.
1993. 1994. What was I thinking?
Regret is hard. It's a form of time travel. You try to start something right now, in
the only moment that counts, and yet your mind is propelled back into the past, into
the things that you did that are long gone, that should have no impact on how you do
things now and yet they do. They are constantly pulling you down into the morass, into
the tears, into the fears that you never will do anything good again.
Use the past to help you plan the future. Use the past to help you live better
right now. But once you dive into self-criticism, doubt, regret you have begun to time
travel. You are living in the past. This is bad. When you catch yourself doing it you have
to pull yourself back into the present. It's a practice. Start doing it today.
One important way to deal with regret is to put it on the shelf. Say, "I'm going to
think about you later but first I have to deal with RIGHT NOW. But thank you very
much for showing up. Have a tea while you wait."
Fortunately I also wrote about this very issue: 20 ways to deal with regrets
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/09/20-ways-to-deal-with-regrets/

How to be more persuasive? @TheBJJMind

I'm going to make a list.
Honesty. If people know you are always honest and you never BS, even at the
smallest levels. You never exaggerate. You have no hidden agendas, etc. then
you will be more persuasive. Your words will have infinitely more power. Honesty
has exponential and not linear rewards. The more you practice honesty, the
more powerful your words become in an exponential way. But it takes practice
and consistency.

 Love. You can't be persuasive about something you don't believe in. If I was paid
to sell vaccuum cleaners I could only be persuasive about it if I felt my cleaner
was either the quickest, the "cleaniest", the cheapest, the whatever, of all
vacuum cleaners. It would have to be religion for me and that vaccuum cleaner
would have to be the god of all vacuum cleaners.
People are better at smelling bullshit than you think. Actually, people are about
as good as you would expect. If you put a plate of bullshit in front of them, it will smell.
The slightest bit of dishonesty and lack of love for what you are being persuasive
on, creates bullshit. And it takes only seconds for the other person to smell it and then
the meeting is ruined. If you can't say something without turning it into bullshit then
better to stay quiet until you stop vomiting. Then you will become a more persuasive
person.

How can you build your self esteem when you are confronted
daily by people who's opinions confirm your worst fears about
yourself? @ciaranmurphyads
These are two sides of the same question. We've all had many darkest moments.
When I first moved to the city I had no friends, no girlfriend, was constantly worried I
was going to lose my job, and on and on. I shared a room with one other guy who
would constantly bring over his girlfriend when they thought I was asleep. They would
have sex in the bathroom, against the wall. My bed shared the wall with the bathroom.
I had a garbage bag next to my bed. That was my only luggage. Every morning I would
pull my suit out of the garbage bag, put it on and go to work. I don't think I did laundry
for three months.
This was the best time of my life.
Another time I had a penthouse 5000 square foot apartment, money in the bank,
kids, I had sold a business, I was starting a new business. This was the worst time in
my life. I've had lots of moments in between. But this particular time, along with
several others, I felt suicidal.
What you have to do is take a step back. It's never about the circumstances. It's
never about what is happening to you or who is treating you in a negative way, or how
much money you have in the bank.

It's about how you are taking care of yourself.

In 1995 I was dating a girl who was a creative genius. She made beautiful
websites out of thin air. This was back in 1995. She was also incredibly obnoxious and
negative. She was so obnoxious but so smart that everything she said made me laugh.
Even if her most vicious barbs were aimed directly at me. But since I had no selfrespect I just laughed. The jokes were funny.
To look at her was to hate her. For instance, we were walking in the street New
Year's Day 1996 and a bum walked up to her and simply spat on her. Not to say she
caused it but she always looked and acted so negative that one's gut reflex was to spit
on her. She was also a heroin addict.
One time we woke up and she said let's go bicycle riding. Since I had no
opinions of myself and was always willing to do what other people suggested I got on a
bike and spent the morning dodging cars that were trying to kill me. We went more and
more East, more and more Lower, into the projects in the Lower East Side. She said,
"wait here" and got off her bike while everyone around was staring at me, at the bikes.
She went into the projects and came back a few minutes later. Later that day she told
me she got heroin. And if I was a "bitch" and didn't like it I could just leave. I stayed.
Then. It took me awhile to leave.
My point in bringing her up is twofold. One, she always put me down. Always.
Every hour of every day. And yet it was hard for me to leave her. I felt bad about
myself because she was my mirror so I wanted her to say nice things to me and I kept
sticking around hoping for those nice things to show up in my mirror. Two, one of the
things she said to put me down was "you're like reading the same newspaper twice"
because I always kept saying the same story twice. In my constant attempts to interest
her in my life I would repeat things and forget I had already told her them,
So now I'm going to be like reading the same newspaper twice in what I'm about
to say. It's important at these moments (at every moment really but particularly at
these moments) to take a step back and say: I'm going to get healthy. Forget all the
people putting me down for a second. Forget the dark moments. Right this moment I
need to do what I can to get healthy. And this doesn't mean eating yogurt and not
snacking. This means, keeping all four "bodies" healthy: physical, emotional, mental,
and spiritual. When you do this, your body, mind, and spirit will be like a machine.
You'll be like a warrior of the planet Earth. A force of nature.

Physical: eat well, eat early, sleep many hours, exercise. Clean yourself.
Emotional: Do not be around negative people, people who will bring you down or
make your feel bad about yourself. Sometimes you can't help it. Sometimes at your
school or place of work or even in your home, they are just there. Then what you have
to do is train them by placing boundaries. When they start putting you down, do not
engage. Don't laugh, don't fight back, don't argue or get defensive. Just move away.
Say "hi" and walk away.
I'll repeat it: DON'T ENGAGE. Only by setting boundaries will they understand.
Not by talking to them (they won't listen), not by kissing their ass (that will make them
worse), not by taking it good naturedly (they will think you like it) - just move away.
And, in exchange, try to find positive people in your life. If you can't find them
immediately, try to read books or blogs by positive people. I should've done this in
1995. I'm a bit better at it now. It takes practice.
Sometimes you have a reason to feel negative. But that doesn't mean you
shouldn't read from or be around people with positive energy. Every part of the
universe has elements of both types of energy. But too often we get sucked into
negativity and we let the positive side of ourselves shrink into nothing. That's called
"unhealthy". Don't do it.
Mentally. Forget everyone else. Read books every day (not garbage like news or
TV). Come up with ideas to make people's lives better every day. This is the only way
to get excited about real world things in such a way that it takes you off the floor to
actually want to DO something. You must come up with ideas every day. I've been
saying this for over a year on this blog and I've also been saying that in "six months
your life will be completely different". Well, for the past six months I've been getting
testimonials telling me I was dead on.
Spiritually. There's not that much difference between you and everyone else.
And everything else for that matter. Being grateful. Putting yourself in other people's
shoes, appreciating the smallest slices of each moment, no matter how scary the future
is or how depressing the past has been - this will keep your spiritual body healthy.
Remember that the future is just science fiction. It's far away and doesn't exist, even if
it potentially has the gift of fear and failure waiting for you. And remember that the
past also is gone. It may have left an impression on you. But that impression exists
RIGHT NOW. Thats all that's left of the past. Something that exists right now. Say hello

to it. Then appreciate the RIGHT NOW. That's all you need to do to keep the spiritual
body healthy. And do it as much as possible. Everytime you feel yourself dragged into
the time machine of past and future.
Do these four things consistently (and you can track them via a site, tdp.me set
up just for this) and you will get up off the floor, people will begin to treat you better,
you will become an idea machine, and each moment will glisten like a diamond blasted
like coal burned in the center of the sun.

I don't know what to do in life and over what i am good. I lose

interest in whatever i do after some time. can you help me find?
@alihb12
Ali, It's a horrible thing and I know how you feel. Not the feeling of "I don't know
what to do" but the feeling of "I feel bad that I don't know what to do".
When I was 18 I wanted to be a psychologist. Then I wanted to be an academic
in computer science. Then I wanted to be a novelist. I felt the only way girls would like
me is if I wrote a novel that was successful. I would pass a pretty girl on the street and
I would think, "she won't like me until I publish a novel".
Then I wanted to be have my own TV show. Then I wanted to be a millionaire.
Then... You get the picture. Every few years things changed.
My ten year old daughter said to me yesterday, "I don't even know yet what I
want to do when I grow up." I told her, "That's funny because I'm 44 and I don't know
what I want to do when I grow up either." And she laughed and said, "what do you
mean? You're a grownup!". Little kids sometimes think they know more about what
"grownup" means than grownups do.
We're all given this very deep impression when we are young that by the time
we are "grown up" that everything needs to be settled. We need to have a stable
financial life, a spouse, children, upward mobility, a career that moves from success to
success. We need to be an aquanaut or an astronaut or a politician or a lawyer or
something!

But that rarely happens. Even now I'm trying to figure out what to do next. I
switched careers a few years ago and decided to focus on writing and investing. At
some point I will switch careers again. Not because I am interested in anything else but
it's because it's what I've done all my life and I finally can't fight it anymore. In fact, I'm
excited to see what I come up with that will hold my attention for more than a few
weeks.
So I'm envious of you. You have an extra decade or so on me where you can
continue to discover things you are interested in. You can continue to meander and pick
up things along the way, the things that will add up to a great "you". It's like a magnet
on the beach, picking up all the stray pieces of metal. Who knows what you will find!
Maybe some gold (do magnets pick up gold? I don't even know).
Enjoy the meanderings, the soul searching, the loves lost, the time wasted. All of
it will add up to a complex and very unique "you". The more you appreciate RIGHT
NOW the more the future will become a fantastic reality. Don't pressure yourself to be
in the future.

Which self help gurus have helped you in your life and how?
@EliSchostak
I don't really like the self-help category. That said, I've probably read every selfhelp author out there, ranging from the psychology section to the self-help section to
the occult section and all the sections in between.
The problem is, most self-help authors focus on the wrong thing: how to get
better at something. The goal in life is not to be the most impressive person in a
meeting . Or to have the most money. Or to get the most girls. Not saying those are
bad goals. We all have to live in the real world and we can't become monks.
But often the goal in life is to cultivate NOT wanting those things. To be happy
even if you aren't the most impressive person in the meeting, or the richest, or having
the most sex, or being the best speaker, or being the most creative. Sometimes it's
important to realize that the struggles, the little sufferings that battle us each day are
not to be avoided but to be viewed as opportunities to strengthen the soul. To be
grateful for what we have now, struggles and all, rather than to put together some
complicated manifesto about how life SHOULD or COULD be in some distant future.

I think most self-help tries to convince you that suffering could be circumvented
through various tricks and techniques that will ultimately not work or even worse, cause
massive harm.
That said, a good book is "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. I think he
borrows from various spiritual disciplines and condenses it down into something easily
accessible. He focuses on various techniques one can use to be content and peaceful
right now, rather than obsessing on past issues, or "visualizing" future outcomes that
will crush us if they don't happen. I also like Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell. The
former for her frank discussions with people during seminars and the latter for his
unique modern interpretations of various religions. I didn't realize this until I had
already read several books by both but it turns out they are married. Funny how that
works.

How important to you find it to have a clean/neat workspace?

@joelclark22
I've always been a total mess. It's almost as if I'm incapable of cleaning up after
myself. This is a cop-out. But once a week I pay to have someone clean my workplace.
Sometimes twice a week if the kids have been over. If I could pay someone to bathe
me I would.
It's really true: cluttered desk = cluttered mind. But it goes deeper than that.
You need clean everything. I can't function creatively if my stomach is full. Then all my
brain energy, all my blood, all the oxygen in my body, is hanging out near my stomach
trying to digest whatever crap I force fed it on some binge.
Or if my head is foggy from lack of sleep. Or if my emotions are crowded with
anger and jealousy. Or if my breath is bad. It's important to clean teeth because
bacteria love to grow in your mouth. And an infection in the mouth can ultimately (and
quietly) spread to an infection in the brain or heart. Believe it not but many heart
attacks and strokes can find their roots in, basically, the roots of your teeth.

Clean your desk! Clean your mouth! Clean your emotions, your sleep, your
aches, your pains. Gradually, these will be precursors to greater productivity and
creativity. Try it. You'll see.

Love 'What Are You?' post. How do u avoid the

#fuckitnothingreallymatters effect? @EricRomer
Here's the thing: it's true. Nothing does matter. Whatever you do, 10 years from
now nobody will remember. In some rare cases they will remember. But 100 years from
now nobody will remember. Or 1000 years from now. The universe is 13 billion years
old. We're nobody in it. Each life is like a small pin in the middle of a gigantic stadium.
It means nothing.
But...we have to feed our family. We have to feed ourselves. Our bodies want us
to treat them well and to survive. So we need to do what it takes. And ideally the rest
of the time we sit and we think to ourselves, "what will it feel like to be dead". Because
eventually we will spend most of eternity being dead. So why not practice thinking
about what it will feel like right now. Practice as much as possible. There are secret
surprises waiting for you if you think a lot about what it would be like to be dead, to be
gone, to have no trace of you left. You end up loving everything around you. Because
everything will eventually be gone.
All of the people we are arguing with. Everyone who has done us wrong.
Everyone we have loved or ignored or hated. We all have that in common. We're all
brothers and sisters in death.
This moment is very special. Because in just one more moment, like everything
else, it passes into the land of the dead.

Can you pinpoint an event that changed you into the person you
are today? @holm
Yes. I was depressed because I had just spent twenty years or more trying to
make everyone happy. My friends, my family, my bosses, my investors, my colleagues,
my employees, my customers, girlfriends, people I wanted to do business with, people I

wanted to kiss up to because I thought I would benefit in some way. And it wasn't
working. At some point you have to step back and say, "this plan that I've had my
entire life just hasn't worked". Every media outlet seemed to be closing to me. Nobody
was investing money with me. Every business I was trying to do was getting stalled at
the gate. I felt bad about myself, like I was always trying to please but nobody was
very interested in pleasing me.
So I decided to choose myself. I stopped worrying about the distant future or
regretting the past. I stopped paying attention to people who blamed me or wanted
something from me. I only would do what I WANTED to do. I only would be with
people who I loved and who loved me. I only would work for things that I hoped would
deliver real value.
By choosing myself I finally started writing a blog. Previously I had only written
in places that "accepted" me. Now I accepted myself. I wrote whatever I wanted, and
ultimately wherever I wanted.
And that led to new friendships, that led to an increase in my search for wellness
and spirituality. It led to living a healthier life. It led to less stress and more positive
people around me and more ideas flooding to me. It led to more people trying to do
deals with me, asking me to participate in more activities. I started having fun for the
first time in maybe 17 years. I feel this blog and everything and everyone that has
connected to it has changed my life completely. I'm infinitely grateful for the changes.
And if I had to pinpoint, I'd say it was when I totally gave up on everyone and
every thing. When I started to be quiet to all opportunities on the outside and choose
myself first. This changed my life.

You said you hit rock bottom many times. Does it get easier? Do
you stop worrying after a while? @martefrain
The first time I hit rock bottom I couldn't believe it. I assumed that I was going
to go broke and become homeless. That my wife and kids were going to move in with
her mother. That nobody would ever talk to me again. That everyone would laugh at
me and my failures. I was almost right on every count. Probably everybody did laugh at
me. I would go to the ATM machine and have a full-scale panic attack when I saw how

much was left. I would lose money in the stock market and cry. I would look at my kids
and cry. I was scared to fucking death. I'm sorry for the language. There's no other
way to describe it.
It became a self-fulfilling prophecy. The more I assumed the worst, the more I
pictured it day after day in my mind, the faster it careened towards me.
If human warmth could be measured in temperatures, I hit absolute zero. I was
cold and hungry and scared and frozen. Nothing was good. Everything was shit.
Everything was less than zero. Everything caused my body to wilt, my heart to break,
my stomach to hurt, my mouth to lie and then puke.
And it wasn't the first time. I've hit rock bottom a few times. And that's the good
news.
Because the last time I hit rock bottom I didn't think about it. Everytime I got
scared about the future I just said to myself, "that's the future. It will take care of itself.
And now this second I just need to do the right things. Right now is not so bad." I also
knew that, statistically, the worst would not happen to me. It never fully did. So I knew
that my mind was creating more worries for me than were actually there. Ghosts in the
closet.
"The future will take care of itself". I knew this was true. I didn't even need to
think about it. So I didn't. I enjoyed the Right Now. And I'm glad I did. The only thing I
forced myself to do was to stay as healthy as possible across all four bodies: physical,
emotional, mental, spiritual. That's where the mind tries to sneak in and trip you up.
And you know what, it worked. It was like magic. As long as I took care of the
"right now" then the future took care of itself magically. Things would happen. Money
would show up. The people around me would make the right decisions. Opportunities
were thrown my way because I wasn't running scared from them. Anytime I got scared
I would literally hit my chest, stiffen my back, stand up straight and say, "I am
abundant!" And it was true. I already was abundant, whether my bank account
reflected it or not.
This is a truism: when you jump, you don't need to look down. The net is there
even if you can't see it. And the net will catch you. So what do you look at? You can
look at the sky. The blueness of it. The birds. You can take a deep breath. You can
enjoy the ride. And when you finally hit the net and bounce you can say "wheeee!" all

the way back up, because you know the net will always be there, and you'll always
have fun enjoying the ride as long as you realize we live in one big amusement park.
I'm afraid of many things. But rock bottom isn't one of them anymore. And as for
the rest, who cares? I know that right now I'm having a lot of pleasure writing to you.

James, how do you deal with the stress of getting older and the
feeling that the years are flying by? @kevinkoskella
Aging, decay, death, is a horrible part of life. And it happens to every atom, cell,
molecule, animal, human. But it's horrible. Eventually, about 15 trillion years from now,
all of the light will be extinguished from the universe, everything left will just be a
lifeless husk. It's sad that such beauty was created and there is no other course for it
other than eventual imploding despair and nothingness. I can relate that you are afraid
of the decay that will happen. And it's not just the decay, it's the uncertainty of which
things will break first, which memories will be forgotten, which bones will be the next to
break, and finally, the ultimate question of what happens next. Knowing that we will
never know until it's too late.
But I hate to tell you, I love getting older. Because the years that preceded my
current advanced age of 44 were really not that great for me either. Or for many
people.
0-5 years old: you shit in your pants and you are dependent on other people
100% of the time to move, to eat, to bathe, to sleep, to wake up, to communicate. It's
awful. Those were probably the worst years of my life. Particularly the shitting in my
pants part because sometimes it happened in front of my friends. Or on top of them. I
still remember that. My mother comforting me when all the other kids on the block
were laughing at me.
5-13 years old. What a nightmare. The fear of first grade. Of school. Of my
father telling me: first there's school until 18. Then college until 22. Then graduate
school until 26. Then work until 65. Then you die. What the hell! And then, at age 13,
junior high school! That was like a prison. I was getting acne, braces, glasses, and
random kids that had beards at the age of 13 were fighting each other in the hallways

until there was blood. And girls started getting pregnant. And now I have a 13 year old!
This is horrible!
13-18. Disaster! High school. Teenage years. Constantly lusting after every girl.
If you're not a guy you might not even be able to imagine. All I could think about was
girls. It doesn't matter what the teacher was saying, I was pressing up against my desk
to get constantly excited. And then I would eye every girl in the hallway with the
implicit question: "will you have sex with me". From 13 to 18. And do you know how
many girls eyes back with a "yes"? ZERO. What a nightmare.
18-25. College, then graduate school. Horrible. And the sex, while plentiful, is
not even that great either. Nobody knows what they were doing and I knew even less.
And then when you start to get a job and you have to pretend like you know what you
are doing but you know nothing and all you want to do is cut every corner and quickly
retire. At least, for me.
25-44. Career. Family. Debt. Responsibilities. Fears. The first time I ever thought
of suicide. Squashed dreams. Failures. What are so great about these years? I mean,
I'm glad I have two kids now. Did I want them? No. But now I'm glad they are alive so
they can torment me for a few more years.
I'm 44 now. I think maybe I enjoyed 5% of the years that came before this year.
What do I have to look forward to now?
Ahh, bliss. I have Claudia so I hope the next 40 years are good in that
department. My kids are older and soon they will be adults so finally I can be their
friend instead of just their dad. I legitimately like them so I think that will be fun. I'm
wiser do I don't make the non-stop stupid mistakes I made from 25-44. Persistence is
not about sticking with something, its about making mistake after mistake after mistake
until stop making them anymore. Hopefully I'm at that point.
Health after 44. Several good things. I am much more aware of my digestion
now than when I was 21 so it means I eat better. I also sleep better because I realized
that drinking was one of the stupid mistakes from 25-44. I also have now accumulated
enough positive people in my life (after 44 years) that I don't have to hunt for too many
more in order to enjoy my friendships. The good thing about maintaining health is that
every year I probably move up in ranking in the looks category among people my age.

When I was 21 I was probably in the bottom 10%. Now maybe I'm hopefully at the
50th percentile. That's a big improvement!
So I figure this is good for the next 20 years and then maybe other health issues
start to happen. Like cancer or something. Bring it on, bitches! No chemo for me.
Chemotherapy rarely works and just makes you more sick. I'm looking forward to
morphine, hospice, saying goodbyes to people. Making jokes about it.
Maybe I'm looking at it too lightly. What does death mean? It means nothing.
Literally nothing. There's a big ocean out there. My life is a single wave on that ocean.
A wave that laps into the beach, disappears, and then gets drawn back into the infinite
ocean, where all life began. I'm looking forward to the welcome home party.

How to handle disappointing someone without burning the

bridge? @arzvi
One time I wanted to break up with a girlfriend but I was afraid to do it. I had
no idea how to disappoint her. So I moved cities. And then four months later she finally
broke up with me. And a few seconds after she broke up with me she called back and
didn't want to break up. And we went back and forth like that for awhile. Finally, she
broke up with me for good. And she went and met a new guy. And got married, got a
law degree, had some children, has a successful career and marriage. All because I was
too afraid to disappoint her.
Don't make such big assumptions. What was so great about me that I was so
sure I was going to disappoint her. Her life is 1000 times better now without me. As is
the case with just about everyone who has ever broken up with me or stopped doing
business with me. What is so great about you that you are so sure you are going to
disappoint someone. You have no idea. Nor do they.
Here's what I do know:
don't make any big assumptions about who is disappointing who. That is just
ego.
don't assume you will burn a bridge. Bridges that are burned are often rebuilt to

be stronger and sturdier. Even if for awhile traffic has to go around a different
path, eventually the bridge gets rebuilt with the newest materials. Trust in that.
You can't burn a real bridge forever. A girl who very tragically (to me) broke up
with me 22 years ago (almost to the day) has recently gotten back in touch with
me. Now we are friends and I can watch as her children grow and I can see how
happy she is. That fills me with happiness, no matter how disappointed I was
back in 1990.
Be honest about how you feel. The feeling of "leave now" will eat at you until
you do it. Be honest, be straightforward, and you will avoid much pain that will
happen anyway. You are already on an inescapable path to doing what you have
to do. So just do it now and be honest about it.
You're not so great. We're all trying to figure our way out in the world. We all
need some adventure until that right situation comes along where we can settle
down and relax. Sooner or later you have to get on with it. And so does the
other person. Don't hold out. Just do what you have to do and make everyone's
life better.

Whats the best way to become smarter? @DoronGreenspan

The best way to become smarter is to become stupid. Like, really really stupid.
First off, almost everything you learned in school was either insufficient or a lie. And it
was also just facts. So being smarter involves starting today with a blank slate.
Everything you've learned in the past is either incorrect or a lie designed to manipulate
you. Think of all of your commonly held beliefs, for instance. Every one of them.
Assume they are all wrong. Now start from scratch.
This applies even to basic words and vocabulary. Believe it or not, the more
words you know, the more stupid you might be.
For instance, take a candle. What if you forget the word "candle". So now you're
confused. You see some wax and a string.
A study was done: you're given a match and a candle and two metal rings.
You're told to make the metal rings into a figure eight. The people who were told they
have a "candle" solved the problem about 50% less than the people who were told they
have "wax" with a "string" at the top. How come? Because the people who were told
"string" tied the rings together. The people who were told "candle" tried to use the

match to melt the candle enough to cement the rings together but the rings wouldn't
hold together. What a stupid thing to do despite their bigger vocabulary!
Take everything you see - try to rename it into it's components. Unlearn the
macro words. Take every emotion you feel and do the same. Take all your relationships
and do the same. What does that mean? It means if you are angry at someone, look at
the situation from their shoes and really accept their anger. What does this have to do
with being smart? It means your mind gets less clogged by your anger, which is
nothing but shit stuck in the pipes. Eventually a plumber has to come in there and clean
things up or the water won't flow. All of your resentments, jealousies, anxieties clog the
pipes and make you less smart.
Accept the anxieties. They are part of life. But say hello to them and let them
move on. If you can. Practice that.
And then go outside and look around. Don't name anything. Don't name the
sunrise, the people, the mountains, the fresh air, the flowers. Those are just words you
were taught. That was all part of the brainwashing. Take a deep breath. Enjoy.

How do you apologize to someone? @edzitron

A few years ago I had to call someone I blew off for many years. I didn't have to
call him but I wanted to. He had been a good friend and then for some reason I
stopped returning his calls. And then when I stopped returning them, he kept calling
and saying, "why aren't you returning my calls?" and I felt so bad I kept telling myself,
"I'll return his call tomorrow, DEFINITELY" and then I never would.
So eventually I called him. I simply said, "I'm sorry. I get that way sometimes
and I don't know why. I get weird but I want to get together and hang out and I'm
sorry." So we got together and hung out. And, because we truly are good friends, even
though years had passed by, we instantly were good friends again. We took a long
walk. I showed him the ring I had gotten for Claudia to ask her to marry me. He said
congratulations. I hadn't even shown Claudia that ring yet. It was nice to share my
secret with a good friend. But the apology came first. Just be honest about it and hold
your breath and get it over with. So you can be friends again.

How do you deal with feeling like shit no matter what you do or
how fortunate you are? @LeonBenson2
I am really sorry you are feeling like shit. Sometimes that happens. We're not
really meant to be happy all the time. Nobody ever said that. Sometimes there are real
reasons to feel like shit. Like when someone close to you dies. Or you lose a job. Or
whatever. Sometimes, though, we just wake up and we're depressed and there's
nothing we can do about it.
But make sure you check the box on all the big things. There's a lot of macro
things people feel upset about that there's really no need to feel upset about.
Let's pick the macro things:
we can complain about Obama or Romney
the environment. That's something to complain about. It's too hot here today.
We can complain about Obamacare and how our taxes are going to go up.
How about we complain about how the banks screwed all of us. I can't even get
my bank to return my calls.
Then there's more personal stuff:
I can complain that so-and-so is ignoring me now.
Or another person trashed me
Or I didn't get enough "likes" on a post.
Or somehow I didn't make as much money on something as I thought I was.
Or I can't sell my goddamn house.
Or my kids don't listen to me.

There's lots of things to complain about. I don't know anybody who is so

fortunate that they couldn't, if given a piece of paper and a pencil, fill it up with things
to complain about. And we can compete with each other. Who can complain the most?
This is a popular game played at the water cooler on a Monday.
The brain likes to complain. In fact, one of the main duties of the brain is to
complain about things. The amygdala usually gets all inputs first, before the other parts
of the brain. This is the part of your brain that gets angry about things. In other words,
this is the complainer in the brain. It doesn't like for inputs to go around it. It's
biological. If you are an animal in the jungle, your brain needs to process the dangers
first. Don't forget that we are evolved from the people that actually RAN AWAY from
the trampling elephants as opposed to the people who got trampled.
But the brain likes to have something to do. Else it gets nervous you will stop
paying it. So it obsesses on these dangers. It puts you constantly in a state of "fight or
flight". You get addicted to that obsession. Your identity and ego gets wound up in the
complaints. "I'm a failure".
So see if your brain is getting too active. Too needy for your attention. If it is,
you can bring it back in balance using what I call the daily practice where you balance
the health and goals of all four aspects of your body: physical, emotional, mental, and
spiritual. You can pick small, incremental goals in each category and check them off
each day at tdp.me.
But the other thing is: you might simply be clinically depressed. Go see a
psychiatrist. Talk things over. See if there is a medication that might help. But don't just
rely on that medication. That's like someone with lung cancer relying on chemotherapy
rather than stopping smoking. Do what you can for your health. But also see a
professional.

Sometimes I get that not so fresh feeling. @TrdrFlridaEvans

Claudia reminds me: I think you haven't showered in four days. So I know what
you mean. But although your question is sort of a joke, I'm going to answer because it's
important to me to always feel "fresh".

I don't always follow these (at the moment I am not feeling very fresh) but
here's what you will do and you will feel fresh:
sleep 9 hours
bathe
brush your teeth and then use a tongue scraper and floss
take a huge bowel movement
shower again
do yoga
no alcohol
no tv or news. Read good books.
clean your desk. clean your kitchen.
don't gossip, even about people you hate. try to hate less but that's hard
meditate. Easiest one second meditation: Just say "I don't know". Or say, "I love
myself" over and over
list five things you feel grateful for
eat just two meals today, minimize carbs and sugar and heavy meat

Ok, you asked and that's the answer.

Who's on your list of people you would take a bullet for? @Dafmaster
I would take a bullet for you.

PERSONAL WEALTH
What is the quickest way to make a million? @runwayfashionUK
I will tell you.
Step one. Figure out an area that is "hot". For instance, Facebook marketing is
inning one. Better tests for personalized diagnostics of age-related diseases is in inning
one. Understanding the root causes of depression is in inning one. Combining mobile
with social is in inning one. Self-publishing your book and marketing it is in inning one.
There are probably 30 more areas I'm neglecting to mention. Maybe 100. Or 1000.
Start listing them today.
Step two. Start a service business in one of those area. For instance, go to every
local business in your town and offer to set up the facebook fan page for their business.
Then, in store, their customers can "Like" their page. Then all the friends of those
customers will see that they Liked that page and will be curious. That's the basics.
Then it gets more and more advanced as you get familiar with the Facebook landscape
and their tools for targeted marketing. If you can't get any customers for this basic
business then something is probably wrong with your pitch, with you personally, or you
live in the woods. You can be ten years old and get this business started. Get ten
clients or more.
What about age-related diagnostics tests if you are not a scientist? No problem.
Write a newsletter about the latest developments in that area. Make a blog about it. Or
sell your subscription newsletter for a high price to every big pharmaceutical company.
In other words, pick an area in "Step One" above and then brainstorm the various ways
you can build a business around that area in "Step two". You don't have to make an
airline to set up a travel-related company. There are many ways to come up with ideas
that work.
Step three. Productize your service. Let's say in the Facebook example above.
Come up with a way a business can auto-post onto the fanpage timeline their latest
offers, polls, etc. Products create more value than services as far as business acquirors

are concerned because it follows along the dictum of "make money while you sleep".
In the age-related diagnostics newsletter example - find software to scour the FDA
database about new submissions that you then collate into your newsletter. And so on.
I know one person who is an expert on how to find lists of "rent to own" homes. He
quickly made a database, put it online, charged a subscription fee to get access to the
database, marketed on Google, and is now making $300,000 a month within two
months after launching. He's 27 years old and never went to college. He can do it. So
you can also. If he wanted to sell for one million dollars today to a company like Zillow
for instance, they'd pay him that in a heartbeat. Since I'm an investor in his company
I'm hoping he eventually sells for a lot more than that.
Step four. Get customers. Knock on every door. Call up every biz dev person.
Make a list of 1000 potential customers and start updating all of them about your
offerings, your new offerings, your customer development, your testimonials, your
outreach and so on.
Step five. Sell the business. You aren't asking for a lot. The question was: "how
do I make a million". If you want to sell your business for one hundred million you have
a lot of hard work in front of you. If you want to sell your business for a million, there
are plenty of companies who want to break into your space, get your products and
customer list, and get YOU (because you know the space intimately by this point) and
be happy to give you either a million in cash or a million in stock plus pay you an
ongoing salary. A million is not a lot if you have a product, customers, a unique
offering, and special knowlege, and if you are selling to a much bigger company.
That's all it takes. Timeline? One year starting from today. Go for it. Make a
million and please report back to me when you do so I can write a book about it.

BOOKS / READING
What percentage of your monthly reading is non-fiction and what
drives the direction of that reading? @bozwood
I have three goals when I read:
1) fun
2) learn. And when I say "learn" I want to learn things that will mate with my old
ideas so I come up with new ideas either for this blog or maybe, in the extremely
rare case, for a business.
3) to be a better writer.
For "A" I read both fiction and non-fiction. I don't get so strict on whether the
reading will improve me. I just want to have fun with a good story or compelling, pageturning reading. There is some selfishness in this reading in that I, eventually would
like to write a fun book.
For "B" I like to read almost anything. It's not necessarily going to be the best
writing (non-fiction writers, almost by definition, have spent time getting good at their
area of expertise and not put in the 10,000 hours to become a world-class writer.
For "C" I want writing that will literally put me in a trance with how good the
writing is. It's this trance that I then try to help improve my own writing.
I'll read or spend some time reading, at least 50 different books a month.
Here's my list of books I've either read chapters of, or the whole books, in the
past week or so. Or books I'm planning on reading. This of this as my
BACK TO SCHOOL READING LIST:

"The Next Decade" by George Friedman. The folks at stratfor seem to have
infinite knowledge about the past, present, and future of all of our geopolitical
situations and George perfectly summarizes them all for the layman.
"SoulPancake" by The Office actor Rainn Wilson. A unique book bursting with
creative ideas.
"How to Write Science Fiction &amp; Fantasy" by Orson Scott Card - planning my
BIG BREAK
"The Complete Book of General Ignorance" - it's actually amazing how much
pure knowledge of gotten from this.
"I Am That" by Nisaragadatta Maharaj. Was on my last list but re-reading.
"Myths to Live By" by Joseph Campbell, an excellent comparison of the various
myths that have evolved into today's science around the world.
"Cyndi Lauper" autobiography. Yes, there's a lot to learn here about being an
artist.
"Tiny Beautiful Things" by Cheryl Strayed. Often an inspiration for my Q&amp;A
posts. Her book "Wild" is also excellent.
"Every Love Story is a Ghost Story" by D.T. Max - a biography of David Foster
Wallace. I'm not a fan of any of Wallace's work but his creative ascent and then descent
into depression and then suicide is tragic and compelling.
"You Are Here" by Christopher Potter - a good introduction to the Big Bang,
particle physics, what happened "after" and what might've happened "before".
"Winter Journal" by Paul Auster - a beautifully written memoir
"U and I" - Nicholson Baker's internal love/hate relationship/rambling about John
Updike. It's interesting in a world of Google because he consciously tries to analyze
Updikes works without looking any of them up and without having read them all. And
then he deals with his own jealousy over those works and compares Updike's literary
career with his own.

"The Chronology of Water" - Lidia Yuknavitch. Beautifully written and also

recommended by Chuck Pahlianuk ("Fight Club") who also recommends my absolute
favorite fiction book, "Jesus' Son" by Denis Johnson
"Loving What Is" by Byron Katie. An inspirational woman who seems almost
supernaturally infused with happiness. She's married to another of my favorite authors,
"Stephen Mitchell" who wrote an interesting book "The Gospel According to Jesus" who
picks apart the New Testament trying to determine what was added later and which
parts might be accurate. I also recommend her book "Who Would You Be Without Her
Story". She's like an overly happy Eckhart Tolle.
Also, since my visit with Amazon and meeting a bunch of self-published authors
I've become addicted to the books of one of the sci-fi writers I met there, Hugh Howey.
In particular, in the past two weeks I've read:
"Wool Omnibus" - a 5 part collection of his Wool series
"First Shift" - a prequel to the above series
"The Plagiarist"
"The Hurricane" and I just downloaded "Halfway Home" by him.
"Daytripper", a graphic novel by Fabio Moon
"You're Not Doing It Right" - Michael Ian Black. Funny.
and, finally, rereading "Factotum" by Bukowski
These are the books I've read or re-read over the past month. I've had quite a
bit of time on planes, trains, when I wake up early, and before I go to sleep and I
spend that time reading. I haven't included books I've only skimmed or read parts of
nor have I included the books I'm planning (hoping) to read over the next few months
and I left off one or two books that I didn't enjoy.

Is it best to just read what is interesting and let the ideas

percolate from there? @bozwood
Yes. Only read what you find is interesting. Never read the news. 100 years from
now, nobody will care what was in the newspaper today. There's not a single thing in
the news that will help you be a better person or will make you more informed about
the world. Here's the news today (every day): Everyone in every election is lying. Every
media outlet is biased so you are just reading some random reporter's opinion so it
doesn't matter. There's more wars going on then you thought. Oops, here's a baby that
just got bombed in a war you didn't know we were in. And some houses are being sold
and yet foreclosures are through the roof and you student loans can no longer be
humanly paid unless we clone ourselves but if you don't want to pay them you have to
be declared "legally hopeless". And some celebrity had a baby and the father is not
sure.
In fact, it turns out you need to use 23andme.com to confirm the genetics of
yourself, your parents, and your kids, because apparently illegitimacy rates are much
higher than you think (op-ed page).
Ok, that was the news.
Here are the books I read today. I'm not necessarily recommending them. This is
just what I found interesting this morning before I started writing. I got up particularly
early so probably read a bit more than usual. I only read a few chapters in each book.

Essays by Neal Stephenson

Wait by FrankPartnoy

The Rare Find by George Anders

Collected Stories of Leonard Michaels

You Are Here by Christopher Potter

I Am That by Nisargadatta Maharaj

And... the ever useful "The Book of General Ignorance" which has more
fascinating facts and ideas than I've read in any other book (I bought it the other day
when I took my kids to the Liberty Science Center. I'm always a sucker for the
bookstores in museums. Who says bookstores are dead?).
From this reading I got an idea for a post that I have not yet written but I know
the title. I'm either going to call it "The Death of Slavery" or, if I think that might be
somehow offensive, I might call it "The Death of Time". It was a combination of three
of the above books that gave me the idea which is, basically, the evolution in thinking
about your value that ultimately takes you from poverty to wealth. Or from stress to
happiness. You choose. Although it could be both.
So, yes, read every morning. Only read things that interest you. Look hard for
things that you find fascinating. Because in your head they will all mix together and
create a beautiful alphabet soup. And like you were when you were a little kid, you will
look down in the soup and see the letters spell out sentences that you know, deep
down, could only be direct messages from god to his special little child... you.

What is your favorite book about chess? @MainStInvesting

As the story goes, Laszlo Polgar had a theory about how to educate his children
(and if his children or their friends read this, please correct me if I'm wrong). Home
school them, teach them a variety of subjects, but at least 3-5 hours a day or more,
they had to intensely study one subject. And in doing so from an early age, they will be
among the best in the world. He put an ad in the paper looking for a suitable girlfriend /
mate who agreed with his ideas. He found his wife. They then had to decide between
two areas: tennis and chess. I don't know why they chose chess instead of tennis.
Maybe because tennis requires some things you can't teach. Like a certain innate
physical talent or strength. Whereas anyone can learn chess.
He had three daughters. Susan, Sofia, and Judith. All three were easily world
champion level (for women) and Judith is, or was, in the top ten of the world for men.
His idea worked. They all made a living from chess. They all became famous from it.
The family thrived because of chess.

Part of his philosophy, it appears, was quantity over quality. Rather than give
them very difficult chess problems (the way to get better at anything is to study prior
situations of that field) he gave them bulk quantity problems. Some of them easy,
some of them hard. The idea is that the more situations you see, the better your
intuition gets.
He put them all together in a book called, "CHESS". I find this to be the best
book ever on chess.
Interestingly, another parent had similar ideas about educating kids. And he
chose tennis. Richard Williams' two children, Venus and Serena, are the two best
women players in the history of tennis.

What book have you reread the most? @BenNesvig

In 1993-1994 I started reading short stories coming out in various literary
journals all by this one guy, Denis Johnson. They were amazing. I'd scour all the literary
journals out there to find more and more stories by him. I couldn't believe how good
they were. I was reading every short story writer in existence and somehow his stories
were an order of magnitude better.
Then he finally came out with a collection. Jesus' Son. I remember the day it
came out. I ran into a friend of mine and he said, "what you got there?" And I said,
"this is the best book that will ever be written".
The other day I was reading an interview with Chuck Pahlaniuk, who wrote
"Fight Club", "Choke" and other novels. I like his collection of essays also. In the
interview he said he must've reread "Jesus' Son" over 300 times. I felt happy that his
writer who has been such an inspiration to me is also acknowledged by another great
writer who is an inspiration to me. I immediately went home and reread Jesus' Son
again. I'm probably not up to 300 times but I'm at least over 100 times.
One time I was looking at Fortune magazine. I saw that Denis Johnson wrote an
article for them. I got disappointed. Why did he write for a magazine that I could
probably write for. Why isn't he in some heaven for magical writers.

But that's writing. It's hard to catapult yourself into outer space even if you are
the best of the best, a writer's writer, the one that everyone else reads. So use his book
as inspiration, but figure out how that inspiration will get you to your dreams.

NETWORKING
What's the best way to network at an event where you don't
know anyone? @BenDelphia
Usually before you go to an event, you know who is going to be there. Maybe
there is a list of speakers or other attendees somewhere.
Research the bios of everyone you know will be at the event. Maybe become
Facebook friends with them.
Then spend time researching their companies. Come up with ten ideas for each
person BEFORE the event. You don't have to share those ideas with them at the event.
But now for every person there you can easily go up to them and say, "you know,I was
just thinking about you" and start reeling off your ideas. If they don't seem interested.
No problem. You've made contact. You've touched base. They will remember you the
next time. Move onto the next person.
This is the best way to network. It may not have dividends for each person you
come into contact with but overall it will have great dividends that will compound into
great success for you.
The key is: make sure you are good at coming up with ideas.

LOVE, SPECIAL SOMEONE,

RELATIONSHIPS
How should a single person find someone? Pitfalls to avoid?
@thecrint
I'm ashamed to admit this: I've basically never given myself a chance to be
alone. I always went from one relationship to the next. Which, of course, led to many
unpleasant relationships. I think I was afraid to be alone. But consequently, I feel like
I've mastered the art of meeting someone:
Step one: Be everywhere they are. Where are they? If you are a man, the
women are in dance classes, cooking classes, art classes, and on online dating
services. I met Claudia on J-Date.
Step two: Don't be afraid to ask. Start asking out everyone you think is
attractive. It works. Practice today. Don't be afraid of rejection. You see someone on
the street say, "Nice dress". If she smiles back, maybe ask her out. Don't be rude. Just
be pleasant about it.
Step three: It's quantity first, then quality. Ask out as many people as possible.
Go out on as many dates as you possibly can. Do coffee in the afternoon with one,
dinner at night with another. Quantity.
Step four: Quality: The only way you will find quality is to cut your losses. How
do you cut your losses. This is goal-driven. Make sure your goal is not simply: "to have
sex" or "to get a girlfriend". You want someone who likes you. Who doesn't do "The
Rules" of trying to "neg" you or make you chase after her or anything that smells like a
game. The theme of what you want is someone who likes you, who is easy to be with,
where things happen naturally. Cut IMMEDIATELY anyone who doesn't go along with
that theme, even if you are amazingly attracted to them.

Then repeat.
Does this seem sexist? Of course some women go to tech meetups or chess
clubs. But at the average tech meetup it's about a 9:1 ratio. I don't like gambling in
situations where the odds are against me. If your goal is to meet someone, go where
the odds are on your side. Or, as Wayne Gretzky says, "I don't skate to where the puck
is, I skate to where the puck is going".

My wife cheated. I played detective, saw the phone bills, followed

her, found out. She confessed and said it wouldn't happen again
but I can't get over it. What do I do? from an email
Many years ago a girl I was going out with got pregnant. She was devastated.
She wouldn't return my calls and finally I went over her house. She wouldn't let me in
the house. We took a walk and she was crying and she told me she was pregnant. I
thought I was in love with her. I would've had the baby. I would've done anything for
her. When we were sitting down on a park bench she was crying. I kept asking her
what was wrong. People were looking over at us like I was about to hit this crying girl
and maybe they needed to jump into the action.
She told me she didn't know who the father was. She went over the times and it
could've been this other guy. She had cheated on me when I had been on a trip.
My entire world turned upside down. I didn't know who she was. Who I was. I
felt like I had been played for a fool. I had been played for a fool. I was such a fool. To
be chasing her. And I suddenly went over every night where she might've been out.
When I was busy doing something. When I didn't stay over. Every moment, every
second of every day. The time I saw her walking around the block. The time I ran into
her on the other side of town. So many missing jigsaw pieces. Again and again. She
was pregnant but I needed to go over the details again and again. I told her not to do
anything. I told her. to. do. nothing.
Slow it down. I just needed to process what was going on.

She disappeared for a week. And when she next called me she told me she had
had an abortion. She was crying. "Please see me." And she wanted to get back
together.
And you know what? We did. We went out for another six months. And every
day I wanted to know where she was in all the minutes she wasn't with me. Every day I
wanted answers. I wanted to know why, how, who, what. I wanted to spy on her. I did
spy on her. I wanted to go out with other women to get back at her. I wanted to kill
myself sometimes. I felt so miserable.
And finally SHE couldn't take it. She broke up with me.
A few months ago I went to a meeting at a new hotel in NY. Some guys were
raising money for a movie. I was curious about it. I met them. I walk in there and for
the first time in years I saw. Her. Serving coffee. I felt like I recognized her but I
couldn't quite place her and I started walking over while smiling. She saw me and
turned red and then smiled back. I realize who it was and I panicked. I just turned
around and walked outside. I stood outside for ten minutes. It must''ve been the end of
her shift because a few minutes later I saw her leave the hotel with her coat on.
When I went back into the meeting I told these guys, who I had never met
before, what had just happened. The coincidence.
One of them said, "you're lucky you got out of that mess."
And yet, I never did. You never get out of the mess. The trauma of betrayal is
stamped on you forever. Not only that, the betrayal would never have occurred if I had
not been a jerk in many ways. If I had not been so inattentive. If I had not made my
own crazy maze that I got lost inside of. It always takes two to create a betrayal.
But now you have to look at that betrayal, and yours, in the face of every new
relationship you have. It's like a discerning and critical grandmother who sits on your
shoulder and has to approve every new relationship. No more games, I thought to
myself, with any new relationship. And yet I still got into games. Many games. Too
many games. Until finally the games were over. The games had frayed me to the bone.
Could I have somehow made it work. Or made any of the relationships in between
work? Maybe. Who knows.

I don't know why I tell you this. Except to say right now I'm the happiest I've
ever been.

What is the glue that brings/keeps two people together in a

relationship/marriage? Tangibles please! @thecrint
It's really two questions. What is the glue that brings people together? What is
the glue that keeps people together?
Sex is the glue that brings people together. When I first saw Claudia, I'll admit,
before she even said two words to me I wondered what it would be like to have sex
with her. And that's how it's been in every relationship I've had. Does that make me an
animal? Yes it does. I'm a human animal. I'm a hunter in the wild. I have a biological
need to spread my seed. Ok, enough of that.
Because no matter what, you need more than that to keep a relationship and
marriage going (and by the way, you should always keep the first glue going but now
you need cement to really build a house).
What's the cement that keeps the house built that's called marriage? I have to
constantly put myself in her shoes. I have to constantly wonder when she's happy or
upset, what are the triggers that are causing these emotions. I want to alleviate her
struggles and help her achieve her goals. And I also want her to be happy right now. I
also want to feel like she is doing the same. I don't want it to be one-sided.
Sometimes it can't always be two-sided. That's ok also.
But sometimes things just drift. People change. People no longer want to help
the other achieve their goals. People no longer care as much about the other person's
happiness.
It's ok to leave a relationship. Life is short. Give yourself permission to leave if you want
to. And give the other permission to leave if they want to. Thats not glue. Or cement.
That's real love.

If ex said I was amazing but not ready to feel that strongly this
soon and he wants to date others, doesn't that just mean he's not
into me? @asplenia
One thing I've learned after 1000 failed relationships: always believe them when
they are telling you something you don't want to hear. There is truth in every word.
So if they say, "I feel like I'm going to hurt you", believe them - they will.
If they say, "I feel I'm too stupid for you", believe them - they are.
If they say, "You're amazing but...", then believe them. You are amazing. BUT,
break up with them before they break up with you.
If they say, "You're the most important thing to me but it's hard for me to end
this other relationship," then take a big step back and never talk to them until they end
that other relationship, even if it means you might never talk to them again.
If they say, "I just don't know right now," then since all we have is RIGHT NOW,
it really means, "they don't know". Believe them and move on.
So, my guess is, you probably are amazing. You don't need him to tell you that.
He's not your mirror. And if he says, "I must date others" then it's a guarantee that you
will be waiting by the phone while he is actually in the process of having sex with
someone else at the very same time. I know this. Because I've been waiting by the
phone too many times.

What can be done to restore the consideration needed to keep a

relationship healthy, once it has been lost? @thecrint
You're going to have lots of relationships in life. Spouses, girlfriends, bosses,
friends, family, children. Sometimes you're going to be angry. Sometimes you're going
to feel regret. Sometimes you'll miss someone, or hate them, or love them, or all of the
above.

Relationships are complicated.

But they are always many. Don't ever be afraid to leave a relationship. It doesn't
mean you didn't work hard enough. It doesn't mean you are a bad person. It doesn't
mean the other person is bad. It just means two people spent some time together and
now it's time for those two people to change the nature of their relationship into one
form or other. Change is as much a part of relationships as stability is. There is nothing
wrong with change.
Even if you really, really want the relationship to work, no matter what
happened, no matter what trust has been lost in the past, it still might not work out
the way you want. You have to be willing to change the nature of the relationship. You
can't ever force someone to love you. No matter what you do, things often change.
Love changes. Life changes.
Listen to what is really happening. Pay attention to how YOU really feel deep
down. Do you feel bad? Do you feel wanting? Do you feel lonely? Then chances are this
is a relationship that, one way or the other, needs to change. And then you'll move on
and find another slice of the myriad of colors that make up the relationship spectrum.
You will explore that entire rainbow before you die. And before you find the pot of gold
at the end.

What are some best practices for getting over a lost love?
@lloydhtaylor
There's nothing you can do. It's really painful. The last time I had a lost love I
would sleep by the phone, hoping it would ring. I would wake up every two hours. Is
my phone even working? I would make sure the battery was fully charged. 6am I would
start to debate making that first "GOOD MORNING!" call, all cheery, all hoping for the
invitation that would never come. Or I would buy something - maybe breakfast, and
show up unannounced. Or I would circle her house, all morning, waiting for her first
foray out towards work or to her new boyfriend or wherever. "Oh hey, I was just in the
neighborhood."
It really sucks. And then you think of the person with someone else, a body
pressed against her, that smile that used to be all for you and now is shared

with...who? No matter what she did, no matter how poorly she treated you, no matter
how much she wanted you to change, or she wanted to change, or she wanted the
situation to change, or you did, suddenly you can't get over her. Your brain is all lit up
on an MRI, every neuron blasting messages of her smile, of the times she made you
laugh, of her hair hanging down over your face while she laughs at your jokes.
I'm really sorry you are going through it.
There's the cliches: better to have loved and lost, etc. There's also the cliche that
you will meet someone just as special again. But it's hard to believe in those right now
even though they are very true. You'll know they are true later. You'll also know that
someone who doesn't really want to be with you is probably not the right person for
you to want to be with. But these things take time to realize. Just like it takes time to
lose 50 pounds. Just like it takes time to learn French from scratch. Just like it takes
time to learn a new musical instrument.
Which reminds me of another question somewhere in this post where I
mentioned a book I haven't looked at in 32 years but remember very well. It's called
"Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No" and its a pop psychology book from the
1970s. There was a section in it with exactly your question and here's what the author
suggested. You can try it if you want. Or not, if you feel foolish. The idea is you need to
go on a mental diet and not think of the person. Because right now, to be blunt, those
thoughts are a waste of time and the faster you move on, the better.
When you think of the person say in your head very softly, "No". It won't work.
You'll think of the person again. Say in your head a little louder, "No!" Keep on getting
louder and louder in your head everytime you think of the person. Then finally whisper
out loud, "No". Then start saying it louder and louder.
Ok, that's the exercise in the book. I gave it as advice once before. In fifth
grade. To Lori Gumbinger, who was getting over Brian Fox (my apologies to these two
if I got the two people wrong but I'm pretty sure I didn't). I forget if it worked but I do
remember Lori shouting in the school cafeteria, "NO!"
My other technique, which I've used for myself and I don't necessarily
recommend it, is: meet someone new. We are often under the misconception that there
is only ONE person who is the right person for us or who is the only person we could
ever meet because of some problem we have or whatever. Well, it's not true. There are

many people who we could love. Who could love us. The fact that you reached out here
shows you are capable of giving it your all to fall in love. That's an attractive quality.
How do you meet someone new? Let's not forget the basic statistics. Assume
you want someone who is in the top 25% (one out of four) of these mutually exclusive
categories: Sweet, Pretty, Intelligent, Creative, Emotionally Mature (SPICE). You are
asking quite a bit and since those categories are exclusive of each other then if
someone is in the top 1 out of 4 of all five of those categories then you are talking
about one out of 1024 people who meet that criterion. Here's the good news: that's
about 70 million people in the world. You have a lot to choose from.
Many of those 70 million people are taken. Or in other parts of the world. But
many of them are also your neighbors, your friends, your co-workers, and the girl in the
yoga class down the street. In other words, instead of pining for your lost love, start
doing the things you love. And when you are doing them, you will be surprised who you
meet.
Go out now and find her. And don't let her hear you say "NO" to loudly.

Honesty and women. What's your experience? Does that

superpower scare them? Attract? Something else? @bkharnish
You mention the word "superpower". Honesty is a superpower. Most people are
not honest. Maybe in the big ways they are but in the small ways they cut corners.
They forget to mention something. They tell a white lie. They wear too many masks.
We all wear masks. Particularly when we first meet people. We want to be liked
and we're afraid we won't be if we don't act a certain way. I shouldn't say "we". I
should say "I".
When I first started dating after my separation from my ex-wife I was very
nervous. I didn't know what to say or do. So I told the truth. Probably too much of it.
And most women thought I was crazy. One woman wanted to date me but she kept
telling me her therapist thought I was "completely insane". At least that was her
excuse.

And maybe I was. On my first date with Claudia I described how when I was a
kid I wanted to learn how to do astral projection so I could fly around and invisibly
watch all the girls in my school undressing at night. Somehow she agreed to go on a
second date with me.
So sometimes honesty will scare away people. But here's where the power lies.
Nature doesn't lie. The universe is what the universe is. The less you lie, the more in
tune with that you are. The less you lie, the more the universe will naturally bring you
the things that belong in your life. This is the superpower. Don't cut corners on
honesty. Don't be "radically honest" (where you spew vomit truths out of your mouth).
Just be true to who you are. It doesn't mean every woman will love you. Or every
business deal will go your way.
It means the right woman will love you. And the right things will begin to happen
in your life.

SADNESS / HAPPINESS
I have an incredible sadness that often can be quite
overwhelming in my life. Does that ever go away? I'm really
scared it won't. I'm not depressed, because generally I'm happy
enough- its when the emotions are just overwhelming, the
loneliness etc. blah blah blah- the usual things that break us all
apart. So, does it go away? (From an email)
I am sorry you are feeling sadness. I will tell you something. At one point i was
addicted to an anti-anxiety drug. I was undergoing a lot of stress. But after awhile (2
years) I didn't have the stress anymore. But I was now addicted to this drug. The drug
was no longer helping me. But when I would try to get off the drug bad things would
happen. I would survive maybe 2 or 3 days and then I would feel an incredible sadness
that was out of my control. I would barely be able to function and the slightest thing
would make me cry.
It's not just because I was getting off the drug. It's because, if you look for it,
the world gives us plenty of opportunities to be sad. The world is a sad place. And if we
fool ourselves into believing otherwise, Buddha is there to remind us with his rule #1:
the world is full of suffering and there is no way to avoid it. At first I tried to avoid it
with the anti-anxiety drug. But when I wasn't anxious anymore and I wasn't sad and I
tried to get off the drug, I would notice everything in the world that was still sad. Still a
cause of misery, the scent of death, the sulfuric taste of despair. I couldn't shake it off
my five senses. And I would sit in my livingroom and cry and think of other people who
were sad and think of the beautiful hopelessness of everything.
There are solutions then. Not to get out of it, because the suffering is always
there. But to understand its purpose. By sitting with it's purpose, understanding it,
assimilating it RIGHT NOW instead of disappearing into the past or the fearful future,
one learns to live with it, to even rejoice in it.

The first solution is to talk to someone. Why are you feeling sad? Is there a
reason. Talk to someone you trust. Talk to someone you are sincerely grateful they are
in your life. Whether it's a therapist, a friend, someone you love. Someone you barely
know.
The second, of course, is medication. If there's no reason to feel sad then
perhaps some chemicals need to be put back in place, although hopefully in a nonaddictive way.
The third is exercise, eating well, no alcohol, sleeping well, and meditation or
yoga. All of which act as anti-depressants. As does socializing with friends, painting,
being creative, etc. [See 10 Unusual Ways to Release Oxytocin In Your Life
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/08/10-unusual-ways-to-release-oxytocin-intoyour-life]
The fourth is a trick. I do this trick because it's what I personally believe. The
universe is like a curious old man. It doesn't know many things. Infinite things. We
can't even fathom what it knows and what it doesn't know. it doesn't know, for
instance, the experience of "I am feeling sad". So it takes a piece of itself and makes
you, just like it makes me, just like it makes animals, and our neighbors, and our
friends. We are bits and pieces the universe has breathed life into for but a moment in
time. It wants to learn from us. It wants to learn what "James is feeling sad" is like so
then it knows forever. And then in the blink of an eye, because that's how long we live
in the eyes of the universe, you and I and everyone we know are back in its pulsating
heart, part of the universe once again, not even remembering that we ever left it.
But it's learned one thing. The feeling of me feeling sad. That moment, that
sadness, this moment right now with you reading my email: its not you learning, its the
universe learning. Me typing this email is the universe learning. When I sleep tonight,
the universe will dream. When I feel sad over a fight my daughter has with her friend,
the universe will grieve but then rejoice because it's learning so much. Then I can
rejoice because every pain, every sadness, every moment, is ME, the universe manifest,
learning something new. What a great thing that is!
At the end of all this is nothing but rejoicing. We are giving and giving because
the universe takes it all in and then we return home to it. In fact, we never left it. We
only did a little dance, so the universe can learn the steps.

All of these things will work. And none of them will work. Because at the end, we
are part of a much bigger picture. And that picture has no boundary, no edge, the paint
drips out of us, runs over the edge, and spills out into all of life.
For me, this is what I believe.

Doesn't being happy and thwarting your want for things impact
ambition? @PratPreneur
When I was in 7th grade we had one of those stupid "Most Popular", "Most
Funny", etc class election sort of things. For some reason I was voted: "Most
Ambitious". I can tell my dad, who was their at the "graduation" was a little
embarrassed. He said to me, "did you even want that?"
What good is ambition? What is it? Let's break it down. It means there's some
goal in the distant future that you might achieve that will make you, perhaps, happier
than you are now.
Ambition is about time travel. It's about traveling to an unknown future science
fiction society where your dreams have come true. Your ambition has become magically
quenched in this future and I guess the idea is you no longer feel it.
Take a step back. Pretend the ambitious side of yourself is another human being
living in your body. Feel that ambition in your body. Say hello to it.
Now ask, "who am I without that ambition?" Let's say you are ambitious to make
a million dollars. Or you are ambitious to fall in love? Who are you without those
ambitions? Take a deep breath while you ask it. Are you breathing? What sounds do
you hear? What things do you see in front of you?
Can you be happy with what you have right now? Now go down the rabbit hole.
Take it one step further. Whoever is happy, put that person aside. Who are you now?
Keep going. Keep going until nothing exists but you. Who are you?

SOCIAL NETWORK
What would the popular social network of 2020 look like?
@Jarmoney
A little website that a few people have heard of. Facebook.
Everyone seems to assume Facebook is a fad. Here's some things I hear:
"Facebook is the next MySpace". Or, "Mark Zuckerberg is a bad CEO".
Really?
Facebook has a billion users. MySpace peaked around 100 million. Facebook is in
every country on the planet. More time is spent on Facebook than any other site by a
factor of about 100. Let's see. What else is Facebook? It's the world's largest dating
site. It's the world's largest photo sharing site. It's the world's largest gaming site. I use
it every day. My 13 year now uses it every day. My wife uses it every day. I think
everyone I know uses it EVERY DAY.
What will happen between now and 2020? Facebook will get better. Two ways
Facebook will get better:
Location: So that means more interesting things will happen between Facebook
and my phone. Depending on privacy settings maybe I will be walking in NYC and I will
get an SMS: "you just passed John Smith sitting in the Starbucks. If you go in and join
him you get 10% off our coffee."
Content: What else can get better? I don't mind ads that target me very
accurately. The more accurate the targeting, the more likely it is that ads become
actual content. For instance, based on my Facebook interests plus my Amazon purchase
history I wouldn't mind if every day Amazon recommended a book for me to buy. Or, if
most of my friends are in LA and I'm in NYC I wouldn't mind if Expedia offered me
discounts to get to LA.
As for Mark Zuckerberg:

 in the past 6 years he's built up a site with a billion users

he's built up a company with a few billion in revenues.
he just had an IPO raising $12 billion with the lowest possible dilution, with the
lowest fees to Wall Street for any IPO ever at that level. Short term flippers were
screwed but long-term shareholders will benefit
he's responded to every privacy issue, every complaint, to keep building a brand
that people trust
he's "organized" the Internet by developing a common format for individuals and
companies to share information. That's why more and more companies are
making their company URLs be their Facebook URLs. That's why the notion of
"your home page" has now been replaced by "your Facebook page"
Let him stick around a little more. I'm sure he's got some good stuff planned for us
between now and 2020. And congrats to him for donating $100 million to Newark's
school system.

RETIREMENT
It seems like ever since you're born life is all about working
getting promotion etc. But what's life after retirement? It seems
lifeless. @martefrain
I was retired when I was three years old. All I had to do all day was shit in my
pants and play with my friends, often at the same time. My friends were disgusted with
me when that happened and my mother had to comfort me. Other things I remember
about my "retirement": whenever the full moon was out it meant the Bat Signal was
ON. Sesame Street had some good moments. I always wanted to try spinach because
Popeye ate spinach but I HATED the taste. A special treat in my retirement was when
my mom would play JUST ONE MORE game of checkers with me.
On other days I would play with my friends. One time I accidentally broke the
door of one friend's house. Another time I drew all over a friend's window. Both
instances I denied to my parents when their parents inevitably called mine to punish
me. Retirement was great. It was creative. I was master of my universe.
And then it all ended. One day I woke up and I was told I had to go to
something called "nursery school". When is it over? I wanted to know. I wanted my
retirement back.
My dad explained it to me:
Well first you go to nursery school for two years, then kindergarten, then 12
years of school, then 4 years of college, then probably another 4 years of graduate
school, then you work for 40 years, then when you are as old as grandpa, you'll be
retired and you can do whatever you want.
WHAT!!!!

Oh god. And then I went to school and everyone hated me (that thing about
shitting in your pants while lying on top of a group of kids just didn't work very well in a
social environment). And then in grade school it didn't work (peeing in your pants
doesn't work either). And then college didn't work (homework? tests? a girlfriend who
was throwing food at me whenever she got angry, which was every day, and grad
school didn't work (I got thrown out)). Then jobs didn't work. I was always trying to do
something on the side (write a novel, start a business). I wasn't very good at corporate
politics. Later, when I had more flexible jobs I would disappear for months at a time
(CEO to me: "Jim Cramer wants to know why you are never here") or I would just
disappear completely (in the middle of a meeting, walking out of the building, never
coming back).
"Work" is just a tiny subset of the life around you. You do it to live. You do it
when you have to. All other times it should be avoided. You're in the Matrix but you
don't realize it. Bit by bit you can plan your escape.
"But what if I have no money?" you might say. Good question. EVERYONE has
skills to develop multiple streams of income on their own. Make sure you are healthy.
Make sure you are coming up with ideas nonstop and your idea muscle is healthy. Be
around supportive people. Give yourself a five-year time period to break free. And then
start dipping your feet in the River of Change. Once you are immersed from toe to
head, you will feel as if you are suffocating for air. But you will find an ocean of life
swimming around you. You'll swim off the island, into the current, and sometimes those
currents will be rough, will throw you around, will make you feel like you are going to
die, crashing into the rocks. But you will never swim back to that little island. The entire
world needs to be explored.
That is your "retirement". It can start right now and it will never be boring and it
will never end.

IDEAS
When you generate ideas everyday, do you stick to a particular
area (i.e. your current projects) or are you all over the map?
@richcollins
Yes, go all over the map. The key is not generating the right idea. The key is
that you are making your brain sweat.
If someone told me, "Come up with 100 things Congress can do to make the
country better" it will be hard for me. My brain will hurt. Maybe I can come up with 10
really quickly (privatize and sell off all highways and schools. Flat tax of 10%, etc) but
maybe around 20 or 30 my brain will start to hurt. Just like my arms would hurt if
someone kept adding weights to a bench press. But keep pushing. As they say in the
gym, "push through the pain". It's only your mind in the way. Get your mind used to
sweating past that hard moment where you hit your personal idea frontier.
You want to expand out that frontier. It doesn't matter how. Come up with
ideas for books, for businesses, for art projects, for your friends' businesses, for recipes
you've never thought of trying, for movie sequels, for whatever you want. It's your
head! Put the whatever the hell you want in there.
For the first six month it will be like any learning curve. Your idea muscle has
atrophied. So for six months it will get better super fast, the way you would increase
your golf skills every day if you are a total beginner and start playing every day with a
pro. Then at six months it will be harder but that's ok. You're already on your way to
being an idea machine.
Once you are an idea machine, then you can say: "I want to come up with an
idea for a new business" and your brain will work magic for you. It will be like pulling
ten beautiful rabbits out of a magic hat. And all the rabbits will live and flourish. You
just have to decide which one you will want to keep as a pet and which ones you will

give away. You will be so full of ideas you can give and give and it won't matter. People
can steal your ideas, people can give you no credit, your ideas can end up bouncing
across the waves and end up marooned somewhere where you can't touch them. But it
doesn't matter. You will always have more.
And not just in business. In everything. Your car stuck in the middle of the
desert? No problem. You will know what to do. Your kids don't know what to do for
their vacations? No problem, you'll figure it out. Your date treating you like crap. No
worries - you'll dump her/him and quickly find the next one.
Ideas are the way we navigate the zombieland that most people live in. Suddenly you'll
realize they are all moving in slow motion. And you'll find the path to safety, the path to
riches, the path to your home.

Realized I have no idea what I'm working towards with my life.

What are you ultimately working towards? How did you figure it
out? @lewisquartey
I want to make a comic book. When I was five years old I read a comic of "The
Legion of Super Heroes" that had everything from Superboy, to the Greek god Apollo,
to time travel to superheroes from other planets who were, god forbid, in love with
each other (inter-alien relationships!). It was like an entire universe of possibility
opened up to me. I could make a story that could be...could be...about...ANYTHING!
What the...! I wanted to read it, do it, draw it, write it, eat it, shit it, talk about it.
I bought so many comic books I filled up two closets worth. Big ones small ones.
Archie Digest, Shazam Annual, Classics Illustrated, Amar Chitra Katha (from my Indian
friends down the street), Dr. Strange, Batman, on and on and on. And it never stopped.
Then, when I was thrown out of graduate school I started up again (I had taken
a five year break from freshman year of college until i was about a year out of graduate
school). This time I read all the adult-oriented comics from Watchmen to Eightball to
Peep Show, Yummy Fur, R. Crumb, Harvey Pekar, Julie Doucet, Peter Bagge (Hate
Comics!). I ran into Peter Bagge at the Aspen Comedy Festival many years later and I
told him I was his biggest fan. He actually started crying! The author of Hate Comics!
What the..? He said, "I'm sorry, there's too much happening here." And I left him alone.

In 1992 I applied for a job at a comic book store. The one I shopped in almost
every day. Without me as a customer I was pretty sure they were going to go out of
business. The guy didn't know how to answer because he didn't want to lose his best
customer. Not only did I shop there but I got all my friends to shop there (Peep Show
and Eightball were our favorites). He said, "I'm sorry, we just don't have the money for
that." And then he had to explain further. "Comic book stores are not really a good way
to make a living. We sort of do it for the love of it." And now I felt bad for even asking
for the job.
I loved the Sandman comics by Neal Gaiman. "The Sandman" was really this
god-like character, Dream, that came from a family of other godlike characters: Death,
Destiny, Desire, Despair, etc. You get it. Gaiman is excellent at creating modern
mythologies interwoven with ancient ones. I wanted to write like him.
So I did. I read everything he had written in comics. Plus everything his mentor, Alan
Moore (think: "Watchmen" but even better: "A Small Killing") had written. Their style
was very different from average comic book writers. I wrote something I felt was very
much in their style. It was titled "Delirium" and it would be an offshoot series based on
Dream's sister, Delirium. I sent it to Lou Stathis at DC. I never really heard back
although years later I had to deal with Lou over a different issue when I was at HBO (I
had interviewed the founder of Juggs magazine and used an image from a comic he
had edited).
What does this have to do with anything?
I want to write a comic book!
Oh, and I also can't figure out what the hell am I doing with this blog. I write
what's on my mind. And it sort of goes in the direction I go. I've been pretty miserable
throughout most of my life. But now I'm not. I write about why and how and what and
even when (NOW!) . And I want this blog to get really popular and I want to do videos
and radio shows and books and speaking tours based on the ideas of this blog.
Oh! I forget: I also want to start a company. In fact, I've started a few. Like I
usually do. And some of them will fail. And maybe one of them will work out. In fact,
I'm sure one of them will. I don't even have to think about it. One of them will. Just
because I say so.

Let me see... I also have this idea for a series of young adult novels. Young adult
fantasy seems to be the rage. I've loved fantasy novels since I was a kid also. but
usually they weren't based on young adults. Now I'm seeing more and more Harry
Potter-ish fantasy novels involving kids. Here's my idea. A teenage girl, say 14 years
old, is having the usual set of teenage girl high school issues (puberty, boys, grades,
cliques). And, by the way, her father is Satan. Which is, of course, a source of continual
embarassment and frustration for our heroine, who is basically a good person and just
wants to be kissed. Like it? The series can follow her all through college, all through her
job. Meanwhile, while she's dealing with gossip from the cliques, a rogue assortment of
bitter fallen angels are after her.
Anyway, I want to write that.
I've done lots of things that before-hand I wanted to do. I wanted to be a
venture capitalist. For me, personally, it was awful. You spend half your time holding
the hands of companies that are failing. Those people are miserable. You spend
another half looking at boring companies (the chart that always starts at $0 revenues
on the left but, trust me, "we're going to be 1% of a 5 trillion dollar market in three
years and there's no competition"). Then you spend the other half working over
contracts to make sure you can do the maximum screwing in worst-case scenarios.
Screw or be screwed. I know that's three halves. The fun happens when the market
goes up and you start to exit. But guess what. Big deal. No matter what area of the
financial industry you are in, the fun happens when the market goes up.
I've also run a hedge funds. Run a fund of hedge funds. Started companies.
Done a TV pilot. None of it was that fun. None of it was great. And even this blog is
sometimes stressful because I pressure myself a lot to put out the best material I can.
So what do I want to do? I don't know. I guess some of the above.
But I know I can't think about it. I can't wonder about it. I am going to do
NOTHING. Today I'm going to stay healthy. I'm going to eat right, sleep well, be
around positive people, keep generating ideas every day, and practice being grateful,
practice surrendering to my situation no matter what it is, good or bad, and then I
know what I'm going to do then. I know what I'm going to do. But I won't know until I
get there.

Do u believe you, or anyone, can ever have a truly original

thought or is everything simply a derivative off past
ideas/thoughts? @FreeMarketsFan
What are you thinking about the most today? I know what I will be thinking
about. Crap. Mindless chatter. He hates me. I like her. She thinks I'm stupid. They like
me. They hate me. They are doing wrong to me. Wrong things are being done to me.
Stop the wrong things from happening. Trees. More wrong things are happening to me.
And so on, On and on and on. A brain is boring. Brains were made to find food and
have sex. We've done it well enough to survive 100,000 years and we probably have at
least 20 to 50 more years in us, if not much more.
So no, there are no original thoughts. They are all derivatives of the first
thoughts: more food. More sex.
But we got creative about how to get food and sex. We started putting two and
two together. Ideas started to mate (hat tip to "The Rational Optimist" by Matt Ridley)
and come up with new ideas. Generations of ideas evolve very fast. Much faster than
human generations.
This is why it's so important to develop the idea muscle. You must come up with
thousands and thousands of ideas to give you a basic population of ideas so they can
mate and come up with new ones, so that new generations can develop quickly, so that
no matter what ideas are thrown at you, the idea muscle will riff instantly so you can
became an idea machine and develop new ones that spawn off of the old.
Otherwise you will be casting about for the original idea that will never come. A
fisherman without his net.
Exercise: come up with 10 ideas today. Then throw away the list. Come up with
ten ideas tomorrow. And so on. I've written before: but in six months your life will be
completely changed as a result.

Best way to give away ideas per your suggestion?

@NickBFernando
My suggestion is this: when you give, you receive.

I wanted to trade for a hedge fund. I had never traded for one before. But I was
trading very successfully in 2002 using trading systems I wrote the software for. All the
trades were automated. I was clocking in money every day. But still, it was too stressful
trading by myself with my own money. I felt like any day I could go broke. SOme days I
did go broke, because I had living expenses I barely met.
So I wrote to the top 20 hedge funds I wanted to trade for. I literally gave them
all the ideas and trading systems. Even the software. One person wrote back with some
questions that could only be answered by writing more software. ONE person. Out of
twenty. And, I should say, this was the second batch of 20. So I wrote more software
and answered his questions. Then he invited me to lunch. Then another day to dinner. I
read every book I knew he was interested in. He allocated money to me. I was in!
Another time, I wanted to write for a publlication. I wrote to the main writer for
that publication (Jim Cramer) and I said, "here's 10 ideas you should write articles
about". I have to say, they were good ideas. I didn't hold back. They were my best
ideas for articles. I should've started my own site and written the ideas up. But I wrote
to Jim and he said, "these are great ideas! Why don't you write for us?" And I was very
happy. I felt like someone had selected me. I ended up making millions of dollars
because of that one relationship. Thank you Jim! Even when I write bad stuff about
you, I'm always loyal that you gave me that chance.

BLOG / WRITING
How do you get NEW inspiration for your blog? I try to bleed on
my blog, but some days, inspiration is gone...
@RobinHeinen1986
In June 2002 I was very depressed. I had no money. I couldn't sell the
apartment I was trying to sell. It was only a few blocks from Ground Zero in NYC and
the playground my kids would play in was still covered with asbestos and the whole
area smelled. I think there might even have been flames still burning on the actual
spot. It was depressing to live there. I'd stand outside the fence as close as you can go
and just look at the worst mechanical mess of pipes, buildings, trash, and men in hard
hats doing...something, i don't even know, and I'd stand there and I wouldn't know
what to do. i was going to die because I had no money, no job, I couldn't sell my
apartment, nobody would return my calls, I had a new three month old, I was
incapable of having sex at all I was so depressed, every company I had ever been
involved in hated me or turned me away. I was just a mess.
I started going out for coffee every morning. I couldn't stand being home. The
home that I was going to lose. The home with the screaming kids. The home that
shook when the towers fell and my oldest child peed on the floor. The home that was
covered with black dust just as the shaking began and the lights turned out and people
were screaming and voices that will never be heard again could be heard if not seen.
I would bring one fiction book, one non-fiction book, one book about games, one
book about finance, and one notepad. And I would read a bit of each. Then I would
come up with ideas for each. Ideas for fiction. Ideas for non-fiction. Ideas for
businesses. ideas for people I wanted to talk to. Ideas for trading systems I wanted to
try.
It was only when I started writing ideas down every day that I stopped checking
my bank account every day. That I stopped shaking every day that I was also going ot
collapse into the ground, nothing but dust and smell left to remind the world that I

once existed, to remind daughters who would never remember me that I once meant
something to the world.
Every day.
I practiced having ideas. I exercised my idea muscle. I would make my brain
sweat. Once I had an idea for a book: How to Win At Every Game in the World. And I
would give easy ideas for winning every game. For instance, in Scrabble: if you know
that XI, XU, QI, ZA, QAT are legal words then you are going to beat everyone who has
a great vocabulary but doesn't know those are legal words. I came up with 5 games,
then 10. Then, make the brain sweat, 20 games. How to win everytime at hearts, at
Monopoly (get the Orange real estate), at chess, at checkers, at backgammon, and so
on. Could I think of 30? Every idea I had, I tried to make my brain sweat until it hurt.
So that's number one. It's not inspiration. it's the cliched version of inspiration perspiration. I sweated. (Women perspire, men sweat).
Number two, your body is filled with veins. The boys who made fun of you in the
playground. Your fear of the first day on the job. The time you failed and were afraid to
tell your parents. The time you got a lower score on the SATs and lied about it to your
friends. Your first car crash. The first time you had sex (don't even TELL ME you
weren't impotent). The older you are, the more of these you have. Yesterday, my
youngest daughter refused to participate in a video I was doing with PBS. I was
crushed. It was the first time she had ever said "No" to a fun idea I was doing. Have I
lost my little baby? Maybe this will be a vein I bleed. The other day Claudia found what
looked like lipstick on a towel. Did she think I was cheating? I'm scared to death of her
somehow not trusting me. Every day if there isn't an artery you can cut and burst out
your blood, there's at least a vein, a capillary, a tear which can drop onto the page and
tell your story.
Don't worry about how you will have inspiration every day. Build the idea muscle.
And cry. The world is a horrible place and the tears never end.

If one is 100% honest in his writing, good chance you'll piss off
your significant other occasionally if not often. What to do?
@aarongoldfarb
Everyone has two boundaries. The things they can't write about themselves. The
things they can't write about others. Some people I don't care about. I'll write anything.
But in general I don't want to hurt anyone. So there are some things I can't write about
my wife, ex-wife, kids, sisters, mother, friends, etc in that order. And there are some
things I can't write about myself. I can write just about anything about Claudia. [just
kidding, Claudia. I won't write about how you like...]
Sometimes you feel you didn't harm someone but they feel harmed. For
instance, I might just say, "Samantha" where Samantha might be the name of my sister
and she might get upset because her name was mentioned. The best you an do there is
have an honest discussion about why you have the boundaries where they are and see
if they disagree. If they do and you want to stick by "do no harm" then you have to
respect that. Take a bit more poetic license and see if you get back within the
boundaries.
My wife once wrote about what happened to her the day her mother died. Her
mother died a very upsetting death (are their non-upsetting deaths when a mother
dies?) A family member of hers protested so strongly that there was a midnight
deadline that she would kill herself if the post was not moved. At just about midnight
she removed the post. Did she do the right thing? Or was she manipulated into it? It
was after all, her experience, her blog, her mother, and the family member who was
offended was not even mentioned in the post. I don't know if she did the right thing but
she made a judgment call and then went back and forth doubting herself, particularly
since the post in question seemed to help a lot of people. I cried when I first read the
post.
All of this is to say, nobody is 100% honest. Everyone leaves things out.
Everyone adds things in. And top of it, we all have our prismed glasses that look at
every situation, adding our own nuances that were never there, and scribbling in poetic
license to fill in the gaps. Do no harm, have honest discussions, determine the
boundaries, and then do your best to fill up every boundary you can in as artistic and
honest a way as possible.

What were some of the simple ways you started to get traction for
your blog early on? Im starting with consistent content.
@AlexBDavis
First off, are you sure you want to do a blog? I probably obsess on this blog 20
hours a day, even when I'm sleeping. I've recently had an epiphany. The two biggest
things I think about are traffic and "will I come up with new ideas". I've written over
400 posts. There are only so many ideas. And not everything you write will be great. I
have over 100 posts in my Drafts folder because I don't think they are good enough.
My goal is to create "blogerature". Good writing that fits in the blog format. The
way literature is good writing that fits into a novel. I read about two or three hours a
morning to get started. I read writers that I think will inspire content for the blog.
Usually very autobiographical fiction writers. Just autobiography is not good enough
because most people who write an autobiography are not good writers (they spent their
lives getting good at something else, hence they have the material for a good
autobiography). I'll then spend up to the rest of the day thinking of ideas for the blog
and starting and stopping and starting and stopping until I have a blog post. It's
grueling. It's 7 days a week. It never ends. And it makes zero money (no ads on this
site).
So are you sure you want to do this?
But ok, you do.
So here's what you do: assuming you aren't writing the same BS everyone else is
writing. Assuming you have something new to say that isn't said anywhere else.
Assuming you are delivering real value into the lives of your readers. Then here's what
you do:
Blog
Build channels on Twitter, Facebook, Quora, Pinterest, Amazon, so people
become aware of your blog through a variety of social media.

 "Crush It" - this comes the Gary Vaynerchuk book called "Crushing It" and I like
how he thinks about these things: basically, comment on everyone else's blog.
Participate in every Facebook question. Tweet in various conversations. Answer
questions on Quora. Self publish a book.
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/05/why-and-how-i-self-published-a-book/.
Crush it everywhere. I admit I did not do this so well. But I saw Claudia
http://claudiayoga.com do it for her blog and she built up quite a following from
scratch.
Syndicate - write for other blogs. Write for the Huffington Post, or the top blogs
in whatever field you are interested in. I've syndicated my material on at least 10
other popular blogs and tried to syndicate on others that said, "no" (famously,
the Harvard Business School blogs where they passed around my material and I
saw at the bottom of the email chain, "And yet another".)
Do this consistently for a year. You will get a following. Note it won't be a big
enough following to generate a good living from ads. But it will give you a launching
pad to think about other business ideas. Someone once told me: "all you need is 1000
true fans to build a business". So you will get your 1000 true fans. And then you can
decide what to do with them.
But most importantly, cut open an artery close your heart and bleed onto the
screen. Else why should I read you instead of the ten million other bleeders out there.
Humans are like literary vampires. We want to feast on blood. Give it.

You write a lot about your children. Do they read those posts?
What do they think? @kcastagnaro
I write a lot about my kids in such a way that potentially they could feel unloved
later on if they read it. For instance, Is it bad I wanted my first kid to be aborted"
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2010/12/is-it-bad-that-i-originally-wanted-my-first-kidto-be-aborted/. Or maybe they might get the wrong idea about important topics like in,
"I want my daughters to be lesbians" http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/05/i-wantmy-daughters-to-be-lesbians/.
One commenter even wrote me and said he felt my kids should be taken away
from me by the government. This is fine with me by the way. If Barack Obama wants to
raise my kids he can have at it.

My kids don't read my posts. They haven't even read my comic book, which I
have repeatedly thrown at them and told them they would be tested later on. They
ignored me and didn't read it. One time one of them (I forget which) told me, "your
blog contains inappropriate material for children" and that's why they don't read it.
WHAT!? I said. When I was 10 or 12 or 14 you couldn't stop me from reading
inappropriate material. I would fake vomit into the toilet, flush (so there was no
evidence) claim sickness, JUST so I could stay home from school and read inappropriate
content all day long. Which my parents' bookshelves were full of. By the time I was 12 I
had read the novels "Candy" by Terry Southern. "Boys & Girls Together" by William
Goldman. "Looking for Mr. Goodbar" by Judith Rossner, "Wifey" by Judy Blume and the
pop-psych sexual tease: "Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No". I memorized the
pages of every sex scene. I read the books over and over. Heck, I feel like reading
them again now. I remember them so well I didn't have to look up the authors even
though it's been over 30 years since I last looked at any of those books.
That said, my kids don't want to read my blog but eventually they will. Eventually
they will see how desperately I want to love them and want them to love me. How I
hated being a father. How I grew to deal with it and while dealing with it, grew to love
them.
But a post doesn't make a father. With or without their knowledge of my darkest
secrets, I tell them I love them, tell them they are beautiful, and let them know they
are always safe with me, whether they like it or not. And often they don't. Often they
don't like me.
My biggest challenge now is dealing with the moments they don't like me. I'm
sure after they read my posts at some point in the future they might be upset at me.
But they will have to deal with it. Because they will know that I love them. And nothing
I ever write will convince them that I don't.

Good idea or bad idea to read comments on my blog posts that

get syndicated elsewhere? @BenNesvig

First off, I always read the comments on MY OWN blog. But I try not to read too
much on others when I syndicate.
Claudia begs me not to read comments whenever I syndicate onto other blogs.
Particularly Yahoo Finance is the worst. But I do anyway. And then I regret it. Everyone
is accusing me of something. Usually either being ugly, being stupid, or both.
Sometimes I've gotten death threats in comments. About one in fifty comments will
happen to find the right button to push that will bother me.
But I try not to respond. When someone comments on the Internet they are just
taking the worst qualities of themselves and throwing them at you. This is not an
excuse. This is also not saying they are wrong. They might, purely by luck or accident,
actually be saying true things about me. But it's really a mirror they are yelling at.
That's why it's pointless to look at or comment on the comments. Just like when I
respond, it's not really them I am responding to. I am also just putting up my own
insecurities, my own fears, that have nothing to do with the person I'm responding to.
And that's all Internet comments are. A battle of insecurities.
But sometimes they are painful. Sometimes I am itching to respond. And on my
worst days, sometimes I do respond and then regret it.
Better to have spent the time with Claudia instead.

What are your top 3 tips for narrative writing? @Mandizzleno1

I wrote a post "33 Unusual Tips To Being a Better Writer"
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/03/33-unusual-tips-to-being-a-better-writer/ and
I'm really afraid I won't be able to compress it down to three but I'll try.
1) Forget the intro. Everyone obsesses on how to start something. So let's make it
easy. Don't start it. Just forget all about an intro. Intros are always boring and
bad anyway. Which leads to...
2) Start in the middle. Let's say you are telling the story of how you lost your
virginity. Don't start with how you met the girl (or guy). Start with how bad it
was. And how bad you felt afterwards. And how anxious you were that she
would never call again. (uhh, maybe I'm projecting too much of my own story

here). How you met her is sort of boring.

3) Ok, back to the actual first sentence, now that you've given us the middle. Start
with a cliffhanger. The very first line. Like in my answer here. I wrote down the
three items first (including this line). And now I'm going to go and write that first
sentence.

I just found your blog. I appreciate the honesty. It seems like you
struggle with your own advice, does it ever get easier?
@EdgeFoley
Yesterday I was angry with Claudia about something stupid. And then I was
upset with myself for not following my own advice. About what? About many things.
About everything. We're all human. Our bodies get sick. Our minds get sick. Our
emotions get sick.
But inside, there is no sick.
If you are quiet and still. And just listen to your breath for just a second. And
delay being anxious, delay thinking for just a second, just wait for it, then you can relax
for a moment. Say, "I feel this anxiety and anger, but I'm going to wait a few seconds
before I let it really bother me." Keep delaying, even if you feel it in the body. I tried it.
I still felt the anger but it was not the real me, it was sitting on top of me, pushing me
down. But it wasn't me.
In one way or other this happens to me every day.
The real practice is to acknowledge the feelings and thoughts that attack us all
day long. These thoughts and fears happen all day long but we are parents and they
are children. The key is to show your children where the boundaries are. Not ignore
them.
When I feel overwhelmed with some emotion then sometimes it's very hard to
take a step back and say, "that's just an emotion. it's not the real me." But I try hard to
feel it in the body, where it's hurting me: in my head, in my chest, in my stomach,
wherever. And I just sit there with it. I don't have to label it. Or be angry at myself for
having it. It's there. It's painful. I can give it my attention. And wait.

Eventually I ended up right here. And the pain is gone.

How much or little does ego play a role in your blogging? What
about your thoughts on ego and blogging in general?
@JenMaidenberg
There's a saying: "if it doesn't bleed it doesn't lead" in the newspaper business.
The same goes for blogging. The easiest way to bleed is to take something you don't
necessarily want people to know ("I hate kids", "I failed school", "I lost a million
dollars", "I killed a man", etc) and start with that. Then we see your human. I'm
human, you're human, so we can relate.
When you have ego, "I'm great so I'm going to lecture you on the ten ways to
be happy", then nobody wants to read. Ego is a commodity. Honesty is a rarity.
I read recently someone saying, "Your knowledge is a commodity". This isn't
true. Only ego is the commodity. Your deep, personal knowledge is unique to you. And
if you can express it well and without ego, then people will want to read you.
There's a new area of literature. It's not novels, or short stories, or literary nonfiction, or magazine articles. It's "blogerature". Very few bloggers do actual
"blogerature". In blogerature every paragraph has to deliver value, even has to have a
cliff-hanger. And has to be humble and self-deprecating to an extent (don't be insincere
about it) .
When I sit down at the computer I have enough ego to think "people are going
to want to read what I am about to type" but then drop off the ego there. Nobody
wants to read crap. Follow these "33 Unusual Rules to Be a Good Writer"
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/03/33-unusual-tips-to-being-a-better-writer/ and
that will help with the ego.
The most important thing I do before I start writing is I try to be quiet. If my mind is
filled with junk, then junk comes out. Ego comes out. If I try to just sit here, take deep
breaths, relax, then I feel it helps eliminate the ego so real writing can begin. Don't TRY
to say anything. Just see what happens and start typing.

CAREER
What advice can you give to someone in their 30's who wants to
begin a career in trading, but doesn't know where to start?
@DB0pink
One time in 2003 I lost money on the day before. I had a systematic way of
trading. Only software-based. I followed my signals and nothing else. I loaded up all
the stock market data and would look for patterns. Like if it's the first day of the month
and the last day of last month was down, what tends to happen 99 times out of 100. If
many patterns suggested the same high probability trade then I would make that trade.
Maybe I was managing about $50 million. Because the trades were (historically) such
high probability, I rarely had a down day. And I would only trade with a small portion of
the portfolio so even a down day was small.
But one day I was down. And that night I couldn't sleep. So around 4am or so I
got out and went on the swingset at the local school. Then I got a basketball and
played basketball by the river. then I went to breakfast around 6am at the local cafe.
Played some scrabble there to get my mind off the trade that was on. Then I went
to...church. I got down on my knees. I prayed to Jesus. I'm
Jewish/Hindu/Buddhist/Taoist/Muslim/Catholic. It doesn't matter to me. I'm a praying
slut. I'll pray to Zeus if I have to. I prayed for about a half hour. Please make this trade
work Daddy.
Then I went in. Futures were already against me. Every second I could feel all
the blood pulsing in and around my body. It was like I was bowling and leaning my
body over to make the ball go in the right direction after it's already been released.
Please Daddy pleasedaddy please please. Please ZeusJesusAllah.
I called my business partner. "Let's just hire a factory in New Jersey and put
together the ingredients for some diet pill that combines with protein. I can build a
website. We'll get some porn star to do the informercial.". please daddy please please.

I forget if the trade worked out. I didn't have the psychology for it. I was down
maybe 0.25% at worst. Less than 1%. I hated losing people's money. I had no problem
losing my own money. I was an expert at that. But I never wanted to lose anyone else's
money.
Here's the problem with trading. I won't argue with you. Everyone has their
heart set on a dream and sometimes dreams turn into nightmares but you are entitled
to your dreams.
There's a saying in poker, "If you can't find the fish at the table then it's you".
Here's who is at the table with you when you trade: Warren Buffett, Bill Gates,
Carl Icahn, Vladmir Putin, Ben Bernanke, Sheikh this and that, Hugo Chavez, Timothy
Geithner, and what my business partner and I used to call "The Gimp" after the Pulp
Fiction character. The Gimp was the guy they keep locked up in the dungeons
underneath Goldman Sachs. He's got a mask on and he's chained all up and they feed
him once a day. And when they really need the markets manipulated they let him out
of the cage and there's nobody better. It's you versus him.
Good luck.

How does one market himself well inside a company to move up

the career ladder? @WolfgangBremer
When I worked at a corporate job I was scared to death. I didn't know how I
should act, dress, do, think, etc. I kept trying to kiss ass over and over and it just
wouldn't work. I kept trying to volunteer to do new things and it just wouldn't work. My
boss at the time even said to me, "don't volunteer to do new things. Then you'll be
known as the guy that does those things and your workload will double without you
getting extra pay for it." I don't know why he would say that to me. Perhaps he had his
own issues.
That's the thing, everyone in the corporate world has their own issues. They
will all try to keep you down, while making themselves look good. They are all trying to

maximize pay while minimizing work. Not everyone. Not the ones who do what I'm
about to tell you to do.
But most of them.
On the second day of the job two things happened to me. One is: I was walking
from Port Authority, where I had taken a 90 minute bus ride to get to work on time, to
my office. The woman who was walking about three feet to my right on the sidewalk
was walking one second and then lying on the ground dead the next second. She had
been hit by a hit-and-run taxi. I called 911 at a payphone. There was blood
everywhere. The ambulance came. I continued onto work.
The second thing that happened was that I was given a computer and told, "get
this on the Internet". I had no idea what I was doing. I ended up somehow wiping out
the operating system on the computer. It was irrepairable. Everyone's email on that
computer got wiped out. There were no backups. There was no Internet that day. I had
totally failed. I walked out on the hot summer day and called my girlfriend back in
Pittsburgh, where I had left her behind, hoping I would leave her forever. I said, "I'm
probably going to come back. I think they are about to fire me." I then went back into
the building, waiting to be fired.
But I kept going. I wanted to stay there. I loved the company. But I was stuck at
the bottom and I wasn't even good at it and everything around me was either getting
wiped out or dying.
You can't climb the corporate ladder. You have to fly to the top. The corporate
ladder is too big. When I was at a big corporation my boss's boss's boss's boss's boss's
boss's boss was the CEO of the company. And everyone was in their 40s or early 50s.
There was no way I was going to climb any ladders.
But here's what you do right now to maximize your chances to fly to the top:
Learn the history of your industry. Everything. I worked at HBO which was part
of Time Warner. I learned all about Time Inc. I learned all about Warner
Brothers. I learned the history of HBO. I learned about every division within Time
Warner, from DC Comics to Atlantic Records, to whatever. I learned about our
fight-to-the-death competitor, Viacom. And then later (after Time bought
Turner), Fox.

 Learn the history of the executives. I learned how the head of marketing went
door to door in Louisiana selling Cinemax after Showtime came out. I learned
about how my boss's boss was a huge fan of Gurjideff so I read everything I
could. I watched all the documentaries HBO put out because I wanted to get
close to the head of documentaries even though I officially worked in the IT
department.
Exercise the idea muscle. I'm like a broken record saying this. But you want to
be the go-to guy who comes up with ideas. And if you have an idea, don't play
politics. Go to the executive that best fits your idea. Let them steal it. Become
Google. The source. Google doesn't need credit if you search for "anal rashes"
and find a good solution on another website. You'll still go back to Google later
anyway. Come up with ten ideas every day about how your company can be
better. By doing this, you BECOME the company, not 8 levels down trying to get
away with leaving as early as possible by doing as little work as possible. When I
had ideas for other executives, no matter how high up, I'd go directly to their
office and tell them. Later, word would get back to my boss and he would be
upset and tell me, "Go through me first!" But I always ignored him, I always
gave him FULL CREDIT for everything, and he was happy when he got promoted
(even when people were congratulating me for being the source of his
promotion).
Finally, have lunch with all the secretaries. The heart of the company are the
people who make everything happen. If you aren't connected to the heart, you
won't get the blood and oxygen you need to thrive. You want to reach a certain
executive, fall in love with the secretary. She is the vein connecting you. I had
lunch with secretaries every day. Secretaries, assistants, Directors (the level
below VP), all the people who are the veins and arteries of the company. My
best friend at the company was the head of internal communications. He's the
one who could spread the word on any idea. Don't play politics. Play friends in
the sandbox.
Oh, one more "finally": look for a new job. At least every two years. One head of
HR once told me, "find your value in the marketplace every two years". The job
market is a market like any other and you want to make sure you are being
compensated appropriately. Also, sometimes the best way to climb vertically is to
leap horizontally. In fact, I was always looking for a new job, always looking for
multiple streams of income. This way, if I ever got fired for wiping out a
computer, I knew I would be able to survive. I was always on the lookout for
anyone who would say, "if you ever leave HBO, give me a call." And I collected
quite a few business cards that way.

Finally (for the third time), the best thing you can do is simply love the product
your company offers. If you don't, then no amount of backstabbing, politics, lunches,
ideas, history, whatever, will help you rise up. If you don't love what you do then you'll
grow to hate it. And why at the end of your life would you look back and say, "I'm glad
I spent 40 years doing something I hated."

Riskiest but most fulfilling job? I would say self-employed, do you

agree? @natedogreimer
NO!
In some ways it's actually the opposite. And I'm talking about your use of the
word "riskiest".
Think about a corporate job. You're in a big structure that can easily crumble.
For instance, the economy can create layoffs and you're fired. Or your boss can get
fired which will make you fired. Or a customer can complain and now you are fired. Or
your boss can simply, on a bad day, fire you.
That's not safe to me.
A few months ago I met a guy who had worked in middle management at GM
for 38 years. He had been fired when they went bankrupt. The top management got
golden parachutes. The union workers got bailed out. He got nothing. "Almost 40 years
I was there and then they did this to me. GM had the highest revenues of any company
in the 80s. Who would've thought?"
Yeah, who would've? Nobody. And yet it happened. The biggest, safest job in
the world ruined his retirement.
The tide came in in 2008. The myth that the corporate job is "safe" has gone
away.
The only thing that is safe is you. Choosing yourself.

Take your skills and find multiple ways to make income off of those skills. And if
you don't have the skills, then get them. And if you don't have the connections then
spend the next year making them. But get yourself paid from multiple sources. Then
you are safe. Then nobody can fire you (or if they do, you can replace them. You're
theboss, not the people who hire you).
Will it be fulfilling? Of course, because when you wake up you don't have to
worry about what your boss is feeling like when he wakes up. You only have to think
about the birds chirping outside, or the rain pelting against your roof. You only have to
think about your own fulfillment instead of the whims of the giants who can crush you
like an ant.

Would you ever go into a career knowing you had a very low
chance of success? How would you prepare for it financially?
@michaeltefula
Every change is scary. Entering into a new relationship has a low chance of
success. Starting a new job. Moving states. Going into a meeting with new people that
you have to convince to like you. I get scared of every new thing I have to try. But how
many times does one change careers in life? More than you would think? How many
times do we take the plunge, do we jump off the building not seeing the net that is
waiting there to catch us. The net is always there. We just can't see it the moment we
jump.
One time I switched careers. I wanted to go from being an Internet investor
(which hadn't worked out well for me in the 2000-2002 period and I went broke) into
daytrading and hedge fund investing.
My chances of success was slim to none. But at the time I loved it. I wanted to
do it. I was getting too depressed going broke and losing my house. I had to get off the
floor and do something. There are always ways to increase chances. Every day you can
do something new to increase chances, to lay the groundwork. I'm envious you get a
chance to ride that steep learning curve. It's a beautiful roller coaster.
1) First off, live a healthier life. This doesn't mean just food. But use tdp.me to
track tiny improvements in these four categories: physical, emotional, mental,

and spiritual. For me this meant: going to sleep earlier, stop drinking, eat better,
waking up earlier, take long walks. On the emotional side, I cut off all ties to
anyone negative. This was hard to do. One time I had to hang up on my
parents, who were upset at me. Six months later, before I had a chance to talk
to them again, my father had a stroke. I heard about that and went to sleep that
night in great pain, knowing that I would never talk to him again, and the prior
six months were my last chances to speak to him and I never used it. Sometimes
bad things happen.
On the spiritual side I began to meditate every day. Even if it was just for five minutes.
I needed to clear my head of all the fear and anxiety that had built up. It was like a
steam valve. I needed to let out the steam. And on the mental side, I started to write
down ideas every day. Ideas of things I needed to learn, people I needed to network
with, ideas I had for trading systems. And so on.
Living a healthier life is the most important way to increase your chances but the next
steps were almost as important.
2) I probably read over 200 books on investing. I read books by or about every
major investor: Warren Buffett, George Soros, the "market wizards" series, any
books about traders. I read about daytrading techniques, options trading,
arbitrage techniques, value investing, fixed income investing, I read about
M&amp;A deals that went bad, that went good, I read about convertible
arbitrage, I read about the psychology of trading. I read everything twice. I must
have read at least 100 books before I started trading even one dime.
3) Community. I started participating in message boards about trading and
investing. I reached out to the writers of books I enjoyed and began dialogues
with them to learn more. I started meeting other investors for coffees just to
learn more about their lives, their jobs, their techniques, their lifestyles. I began
to "network".
4) Software. I knew how to program. So I downloaded every tick of stock market
data from 1950 on. Every stock. Every market index. And I started writing
software that looked for patterns. For example, what happens if the market goes
down 4 days in a row. What happens if a stock opens up 20% down on the day
after earnings day, etc. I probably wrote over 500 programs. Then I started
showing other people how to program the way I was so that we all began
sharing patterns.
5) Trading. I needed to trade to make a living. I had no money. My expenses were
outrageous. I had no excuse for such expenses except that during the internet

boom I mistakenly decided to live like a drunken rock star. Now I had to survive
and I did it by trading the systems I had programmed. And using the techniques
I had read about to help me set position size, deal with the psychology, diversify
with different techniques ranging from arbitrage to short-term to value.
6) Ideas. I started writing down ideas for articles I wanted to write. Jim Cramer
liked my ideas and I started writing for thestreet.com and then the Financial
Times and then I did a bunch of books on trading.
7) Networking more. Since my track record was getting good I started sending it
out to other hedge fund managers. More and more of them started giving me
money to trade, which I did successfully until I decided I didn't want to trade
anymore but I knew enough about hedge funds that I converted everything I
was doing into investing into other traders and I started a fund of funds.
8) Downsizing. I knew that it could take years before I saw significant results from
my new career. So I sold/lost the apartment I had been living in in NYC and
went into a self-imposed exile about 70 miles north. My expenses were reduced
by about 80%. I could breathe again. And in that new freedom, I could explore.
Every step of the way I reduced the risk that I would fail. Ultimately it came full
circle. I was running a fund of hedge funds that was paying my income, plus I was
writing and doing well and then I decided to get back to my Internet roots so I built a
website that I, as an investor, felt was more useful than any other investing website.
It's when you combine two areas that you've mastered and fallen in love with
that you end up creating something unique that nobody has done before. Your own
baby that can grow and thrive with your love and passion behind it. I did it and it was
profitable from day one and then I sold it when it had millions of unique users a month.
I was proud of it.
It's through passion and love that you minimize your risk. But that only takes you
to the bridge that will take you to your new career. Ultimately health, and massive
preparation, reading, learning, networking, self-education, sacrifice, and actual
experience will bring you across that bridge to your career.
From beginning to end when I decided to do this new career it took me: 2 years
before I was making a real living and about 6 years before I can say I was VERY
successful at it. I think this is a good rule of thumb. If you want to change careers and
you put in the work and preparation then expect at least one year before you are
making steady money, and 2-3 years before you are making a living, and you have to

stick with it for 5-7 years before it starts being a big success. I've done this four times
and I would say this rule of thumb has been true each time. For instance, in 2007 I
started angel investing and I can attest that after doing all of the above it is only now I
am really starting to see the results of that.

Is it creepy or overbearing for someone looking for a job to send a

FB message to the CEO's inbox. It's a social media savvy
company. @coilsANDcurls
Yeah, you're a creep. That's so creepy to send an email to someone.
But seriously, send an email but make sure it contains value: here's 5 ways to
improve your company. By the way, I'm already applying for a job at your company as
an X.
Even better: Oh! Try this. This will be fun. Make a Facebook ad and a Google ad
where you are ONLY targeting him. Everyone does a vanity search. Make sure you buy
the keyword for his name. So the ad reads: "John Quincy, CEO of XYZ! I have 5 ideas
for you, here they are! [then put the first one and a link to the rest]" and link the ad to
your website with the five ideas. And explain in the website why you want the job and
the title you are asking for.

ECONOMY
What opportunities ahead in a double-digit inflation economy?
@Agipanama
There's two worlds that people talk about in commentaries in news. The financial
world, where stocks go up and down, the dollar goes up and down, etc. And then there
is the world of innovation, where people actually do things to make the world better. In
"financial news" people talk/argue/slander/like about everything going wrong in the
world. It's so biased it's painful. People want to scare you. So when you say "double
digit inflation" I'm not even sure what that means nor do I want to even address it.
Perhaps there will be inflation, perhaps not. Look at the conditions for hyper-inflation
over history and you can make up your own mind.
So let's just focus on what we do know. The world has problems. Smart people
are working on solving those problems. And they will succeed, like they always have.
The same opportunities exist regardless of inflation. The same problems will be solved.
And a lot of money will be made, regardless of the value of some paper currency.
Alternative energy solutions, including fracking. Fracking, in particular, because
for the past century, oil has been the cheapest energy source and now the technology
for fracking is such that they've eliminated the pollutant issue and there's also been
plenty of discoveries in the US to make fracking worthwhile. If there's a lot of oil
discovered via fracking then there won't be inflation in energy, for instance (which is
priced in dollars all around the world).
Medical diagnostics for age-related diseases. As the baby boomers grow older:
cancer, Parkinsons, Alzheimers, heart disease, strokes, depression, and so on will need
to be diagnosed way in advance of full blown inception in order to best treat these
diseases. Which leads to...
Cures for age-related diseases.

Social media marketing. Old school marketing means "one to many" over and
over again (think: newspaper ad, super bowl ad, etc) with no direct connection to the
consumer. Social media marketing is "one to one" over and over again. You get your
customer, you talk to them, you engage with them, and you can do so for the rest of
their lives (unless they "opt out" of talking to you. We are in inning zero of social media
marketing and mobile marketing. That will change.
Clean water solutions. One out of two hospital beds worldwide are filled by
people who are suffering from polluted water related diseases. This will change as
companies and countries build the technologies to filter water better, faster, cheaper.
Food production solutions. In the early 1970s, economists - people with Phds
that other people thought were actually smart - thought the world (even the US) was
going to run out of food in a decade. Well, we're still here. Food has gone from
agriculture with people to agriculture with machines, to agriculture with genetically
enhanced seeds, to hydroponics, to aeroponics, to vertical farming, and so on.
You say "inflation" but look at the past century. A unit of light has gone from
horribly expensive to infinitely cheap. Food production has gotten infinitely cheaper.
Most forms of production, because of technology and outsourcing, have gotten cheaper
per unit of productivity. Housing has massively deflated because that bubble is over
(although government measures of inflation DO NOT include housing prices).
Technology has massively deflated per unit of processing power. What else has
deflated. Almost everything. Sure, there probably will be double-digit inflation in order
for the US to pay down it's debt. Good for us.
Work on the innovative side of your life. Not the side that wants to constantly
warn and scare you.

Paul Krugman a brilliant economist, or whiny elitist? @eddtorial

Haha.
Think about it. "Brilliant economist". That means: he went to a good school, he
went to a good graduate school, he wrote a PhD thesis that got acclaim from other

PhDs in the area and got him published quite a bit in hard-to-read academic journals
edited by other PhDs who went to good schools. And he did this over and over for
many years.
Combine that with the fact that the first doorway information opens to get into
your brain is the amygdala, the part of the brain that responds to danger and is ready
instantly to pounce with rage, fear, anxiety, etc.
Put the two together.
Now what words come out? It turns out "brilliant economist" and "whiny elitist"
can be interchangeable.

If you had an unlimited budget of time, money and manpower,

how would you end poverty and war? @jphoenix24
The first step to end poverty and war is for the richest, most successful, most
militarily powerful country in the world to take the first step. (That means the US).
There's more than enough food to feed all the people in the world. The problem
is that corrupt governments have leaders that siphon off all the money a country
generates and takes the money for themselves, their relatives, and their friends. The
Middle East, Africa, and parts of Asia are notorious for this. We let them do it. We're
like the kid in school (uhh, we are like how when I was a little kid in school) who thinks
he has to pay people to be his friends.
The best thing we can do with people is simply trade with them. End sanctions
wherever we have them. Don't give foreign aid but allow companies to trade with each
other. There's no reason to give foreign aid to a country with a leader that is just going
to pocket it. We don't need to pay people to be our friend. But if the people in those
countries are allowed to trade with the people in our countries then barriers will go
down. We'll see that most of the 70 million Iranians are no different than the 300
million Americans who want to do business with them. We'll see that most North
Koreans are dying to do business with us. Literally.

It starts with the US opening up our trade borders. Offering to be friends where,
superficially, the countries seem like they don't want to be friends because they have
corrupt leaders (Iranians, Venezuelans, Cubans, etc hate their leaders but our sanctions
make us the enemy instead of the friend).
For awhile, the leaders will still be corrupt. The hands will be out. The hands will
grab. But nobody goes to war with their customers. And eventually, the more dollars
that flow around, the more people will get fed.

Got a post card about a class action lawsuit against Bank of

America entitling me to $, what are the odds I'll ever get a check?
@charliehay
I get one of those a month for various reasons. I have two responses:
1) You will never get a check. If you do it will be for $35.17. Meanwhile, the
lawyers make a ton of money. Something should be done to regulate classaction suits but too many congressmen are lawyers and made their money that
way (look at John Edwards) so you can forget about that.
2) Business idea: create a class action lawsuit portal. Get every class action lawsuit
on there (there are thousands). Almost everyone in the country is entitled to be
in the "class" of some lawsuit. For instance, if you are a vegetarian and ate
McDonald's fries in the 90s you are owed some money. If you used in ipod in
2005 you are owed some money. Etc. Everyone is owed some money.
Meanwhile, how much would a lawfirm pay to either advertise or get leads from
your website. A lot! Guess what the most expensive word is on Google AdWords?
Mesothelioma!
Because it's related to huge huge class action lawsuits involving asbestos. So
lawfirms will pay several hundred dollars for even a click if someone searches on that
word. So a class action lawsuit portal will make a lot of money. Go for it! I was going to
make this but made Stockpickr.com instead.

POLITICS
Kinda depressed about upcoming elections. Will be Bama-Redux
or Dark Scary Mitt@Kitsune808
Answer this: what President has every changed your life? I'm going to assume
you didn't sign up for the army and get killed in Iraq. Because Bush (and Obama, who
continued the wars) certainly changed a lot of lives. But if you're the average person on
the street, who changed your life? Did Clinton? Did Bush? Did Obama?
Certainly Washington and Lincoln changed a lot of lives. More US citizens died
(as a percentage) on their watch than any other Presidency. And Roosevelt sent off a
lot of people to be killed. So dying is probably the biggest way Presidents change
people's lives. Presidents have very little domestic power. Congress does. Presidents
have the ability to make treaties and throw parties but not much else. So, for me
personally, I could care less about who is President. Its just a popularity contest and I
wish there was no such job as President.
See also: Abolish the Presidency, It's a Useless Job.
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2011/08/abolish-the-presidency-its-a-useless-job/

FAILURE
How do you get comfortable with failure? @JoelEnglander
Let's define failure: you pick a goal, take a number of steps to make that goal,
and somehow the goal doesn't happen. And it feels really really bad.
Is that failure?
No, not at all.
Failure is when you then say, "Shit! I failed."
Now it's a failure.
When I was in my 20s I practically gave my life to write and publish a novel. I
wrote 3 novels of about 400 pages each. I wrote a novella of about 150 pages. I wrote
dozens and dozens of short stories. I wrote comic book scripts. I wrote screenplays. I
planned documentaries. I shot TV pilots. It is so boring to spend 8 hours a day typing
something that will never ever see the light of day. I was thrown out of graduate
school. I took crappy jobs that would give me time to write. I gave up spending time
with my girlfriend(s). Embarrassingly (to all my friends), I kept calling myself "a writer".
And I never got a novel published. To this day. I kept sending stuff out to
agents, literary magazines, and publishers. I would take classes on writing. I would
read encyclopedias on literary criticism. I would read every writer I could to see what
they were doing right that I wasn't. I would think to myself over and over, "Damn, I
can do it better than this guy."
But I didn't. I wasn't. I failed.
So finally I gave up. After five years of writing 3000 words a day, I took a job at
HBO, I made some creative websites that I'm proud of, I started a company, I sold it, I
lost all the money I made, I bought a penthouse apartment in NYC, I totally lost it, I

built and sold other companies. I built and failed at other companies. Meaning: all the
money disappeared. I started writing about finance. Very different from writing novels.
Or not. I wrote some boring books on finance. I started angel investing. I ran a fund of
hedge funds. I did lots of things.
I never got comfortable with failing. It's like putting on clothes when you are
wet. Sometimes you have to twist and squirm a little to get everything on. The same
thing with life. Most of the time you are all wet. But you have to put your clothes on
every day and do the things you were meant to do. The things that put a roof over your
head, feed your family, live your life, love your life. Eventually you get your clothes on
so you aren't naked.
Now I write about all the times I tried and it didn't work out. I write about
everything I did. I don't hold anything back.
And every now and then I write a post that totally sucks. Every now and then I
still have many ideas that don't work out. And then I go onto the next one.
Sometimes I get stuck in failure. I think "if only" or I think "now my life is over"
or I think "why can't it ever work" and so on. It's easy to get stuck in the past. To get
stuck in the twists and turns of what could've should've might've happened that
would've changed this or that so somehow life would be better. But all of that is just in
your head right now. It's not actually what happened.
Just like we can never see really see the moon. The moon is just the light
reflected off the sun. So is failure. Failure only reflects the light of our memory. It no
longer exists. It's only an imprint on our current present. With that present you stil
could, you still should, you still will. This is who you are.
Did I fail? Am I a failure? I certainly failed at publishing a novel in my 20s. I
failed at graduate school. I failed at many jobs. I certainly failed at many startups. At
many relationships. When I look back I see a wasteland of failure. It smells, it's rotten,
and it's piled up high. All it is is failure.
Thank God.

How do I find balance between bleeding on page and revealing

too much/showing weakness? Will admitting my failures
help/hurt business? @anti_nihilist
Kamal discusses this a little in his book, <a
href="http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/05/love-yourself-as-if-your-life-dependedon-it/">"Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It".</a> Specifically the discussion of
how much should one reveal and if you reveal too much, there's the fear that people
will judge you or look down on you.
I mentioned to him at the time that I don't write something UNLESS I am
worried that people will judge me. Else I'm not really hitting the edge of where I think I
can deliver value. It turns out that your maximum value is delivered right at the point
where you are worried you are saying so much that people will judge you.
Note that doesn't mean reveal everything. I reveal a lot in this blog but certainly
not everything. I don't want to hurt anyone for instance. The few times I said
something that did hurt people, I pulled the posts down or changed them to respect
privacy.
We live in a "self-help" society. Where people are hypnotized into thinking that
striving for greatness is the only way to live. And "Greatness" is defined in various
ways: non-stop happiness, productivity, financial success, love success, etc. The
problem is is that life is mostly struggle. And that attempts at greatness are often met
with failure. We need to give ourselves permission to fail. Not only fail at a business, or
at love, but even the little things - failure to remember an important date, or failure to
treat the ones around us with love and respect 100% of the time. Nobody is perfect.
Reveal enough so that we can see how you are not perfect. How you learned from it
(or not). How you still moved on and tried to be honest. Honesty gives your words
power. It makes your clients and friends trust you. I can tell you that because of this
blog I have had more business opportunities than I ever would've thought possible. And
if you look back on my posts you will see every failure and miserable embarrassment
possible. And yet, that's how I built trust. And you will too.

SUCCESS
Do all successful people have high levels of energy? If so, is it
innate? -@mtgentry81
I don't think it's true that successful people have a high level of energy.
But look at many successful people and you will find huge periods where they
were just silent. Even Steve Jobs took years YEARS off after leaving Apple. And when
he came back to Apple he delegated almost every aspect of the job so he could slow
down and focus on only the things he was good at.
Only from silence, contemplation, reading, looking, observing, can you drill for
the inner resources that result in springs of creativity. Success is better categorized by
resilience than energy. And resilience doesn't require constant motion. Very often it
requires hibernation, an ability to back off and say, "I can't handle this so I'm going to
think for awhile".
Think of it in terms of the universe. The universe is mostly empty. Think about
an atom. Imagine a giant stadium. The electrons are the outer end of the stadium. The
nucleus, the center of the atom, is like a pea sitting at the center of the stadium. The
rest is completely empty. And yet this emptiness creates all the matter in the universe.
Creates everything you see.
Silence + emptiness leads to... genius? I don't know. But it will lead to
meandering, to thoughts wandering, to wondering, to curiousity. Without that silence
you will be busy busy busy. Too busy to do the important things that lights your brain
on fire. Too busy to wonder about your next idea, too busy to wonder how the world
works. You will have no emptiness in your life. You will have nothing with which to
create your own universe.
It's only when your energy is low that the mysteries within can be solved. It's
almost Fall right now and where I live the trees start to change colors. It's only by

stopping and looking at them without judging, labeling, without the mind whirring
away, do you see the myriad of beautiful colors that the trees change into, a spectrum
from life to death that begins in the summer and ends sometime in the fall. The success
of nature that slowly unravels throughout this region and this part of the year.
The people who have too much energy are too much at risk for burning out fast.
And burning out without having any new ideas to keep the engine going. Will this be
you? Then you are truly stopped, and with nowhere to go. The car has stalled. Your
body and mind have forced you to wait.
You will keep your engine going and drive a long way if you allow yourself to
have low energy, to meander, to look at the trees change color, to delegate the things
you aren't good at, to read the things you need to recharge and learn, to stop and do
nothing so your subconscious can send the messages it needs from far, far away, and
finally, so you can stop in your journey and pick up new things along the way.
Try it in a small way. Try this: Every day, just stop. Stop worrying about what he
or she said. Stop trying to solve a problem. Stop trying to be a hero. Or a salesman. Or
a product evangelist. Stop trying to be happy. Or to make a relationship work. Or to be
a good father. Or mother. Just stop for twenty minutes. No more. Do nothing. Not even
meditation. Don't do anything. Then take a deep breath. Begin to label things again.
Your battery has been recharged. Live your life and succeed.
"The monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulates the creative mind" - Albert
Einstein

How do I explain to my parents that a grad degree doesn't equal

success? I'm 22, 150k in debt scares me. @Rothbard_Fan
By your twitter account I can see that you personally love liberty, freedom, the
pursuit of your own dreams. And yet your name is "John Doe" the ultimate name for
those who want to hide. I am sorry you are so torn. Sorry that your parents are trying
to bottle up the freedom. They are only doing it because, like all parents, they assume
they know what is best for their children and they won't give up control EVER, if they
can hang on to it to MAKE SURE you do what you are "supposed to do".

My parents didn't like it at first when I wanted to major in Psychology. Then they
didn't like it when I wanted to be a novelist. Then they didn't like it when I left graduate
school. They didn't like it when I separated from my wife. My mother didn't like it when
I wanted to pull the tubes on my father and let him die when there was no hope. I
would go in and see him and he would have bed sores while he was just staring at the
ceiling with nothing inside. Many the time in my youth when he tried to tell me what to
do. When he thought he knew what was best for me and tried in many ways
(physically, financially, with logic, etc) to enforce it.
I'm an adult. And at 22, so are you. You have maybe 80 years left to live. Lots of
people will disagree with things you do and decisions you make: your parents now,
then your wife, or wives, then your children, or your peers, or your bosses. In the next
80 years maybe 100 people that are important to you will disagree with things you do.
Maybe more.
Do you have to explain everything to them? To these 100 people? Chances are
they will still disagree with you. Not because you are wrong, or because they are bad or
stupid but just because that's what people do. They get programmed with their beliefs
at an early age and then they start to disagree with everything and anyone that goes
against those beliefs. People have a tendency to walk over boundaries. I'm me and
you're you and there's a boundary between us but often people want to say, "I'm me
but I'm also going to try get you to do what I would do". If they try to enforce that too
hard then that's going over your boundary. Adults shouldn't do that to each other.
There's no way to explain to your parents the decision you are making. You are
22 years old. You are an adult, a citizen of the universe, a human capable of great love,
great achievements, and many experiences you have yet to experience. You are right to
be scared of $150,000 in student loan debt. Maybe they have never experienced that.
They don't know what it feels like. But they are scared you won't get a good job if you
don't go to graduate school. They have their fears and you have your fears. Your
parents love you very much and their concerns are out of fear for your future job
safety.
Acknowledge their love. Love them back. But it's up to you now to become a
little wiser every day. You only need to explain things to yourself. And how do you do
that? You need to plan for yourself. You need to outline what you will do and how you
will do it. If you require financial assistance from them at this point then you need to
start figuring out how you can financially go out on your own. You are 22.

Most of all, you don't need to argue with them or convince them. You stay quiet.
You don't overthink. Your body will tell you what feels right and what feels wrong. Stay
healthy so the message is as clear as possible. Don't muddle the message via drinking,
bad relationships, worries about your parents, worries about your future. Just listen.
Let your body explain to you what to do. Then do it. Don't worry about anything
else.

INFORMATION
Estimating over 50% of the "information" coming my way to be...
tenuous, how should I change my information gathering?
@FredrikFiltered
What do you need any information for? You probably have enough. For instance,
do you need to know about Higgs-Boson? I don't even know what it is. Supposedly they
found it somewhere. Do you need to have the "information" about it in order to get
work done. A year ago everyone was obsessed with Fukishama. Now we know the
truth: there was no more radiation coming out of there than exists under normal
circumstances every day in Denver, Colorado. And yet the entire world was in a state of
panic. I got angry hate mails, "YOU"RE GOING TO BE SORRY YOU DIDN'T WARN
PEOPLE". Did I get any apologies a year later? Of course not. People forget. People
move on.
When I was selling my first company I needed to know information. I wanted to
know what other, similar, companies sold for. So I read the SEC filings of public
companies that bought companies like mine so I could know every deal just as well as
my lawyer would know it. Heck, I ended up knowing more about those types of deals
that my lawyer did. I also spoke to accountants about the obscure accounting rules
("pooling of interests"?) that would change how the deal would be treated from a tax
perspective. On a need to know basis I identified all the sources of the best, most
accurate information, and I read it.
Other than that, avoid random information gathering. The more information you
know, the more you have to unlearn in order to be successful. It's precisely when you
think you know too much, that suddenly you become a "know-it-all", with all of the
negative connotations. Always assume you are a beginner, always assume that
everything around you has something to teach you.

And finally, if you really want to read something for information - turn off the
computer, turn off the TV, throw out the newspapers, and find a good book to read.
That's the information that will stick with you and make you better. Everything else will
make you dumber.
[See also "My Summer Reading List"
http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/06/my-summer-reading-list/]

FAMILY
How / when did you know you were ready for kids?
@iamadamtanner
I have a 13 and a 10 yr old. I'm still not ready to have kids.
It is really hard to have kids. For the first few years of their lives you have to
devote all your time to making sure they stay alive. Then you have to be a good role
model for them. Then you have to entertain them, and feed them, and help them deal
with the hardships of turning into an adult. You have to teach them how to be good
friends, how to share, how to be polite, how to be respectful, how to be creative, how
to avoid bad people. How to deal with it when people are mean to you. How to avoid
being mean to others.
It's too much for any one human to do.
First you have to make sure you know all those things yourself. And nobody
does. I still let bad people into my life. I still have a hard time sharing and being polite.
That's why I'm glad I now have kids. Because they force me to get better at all
the things I'm supposed to teach them. And sometimes I even love them.

You've chronicled your experiences as a father, what is your topten list when expecting? @Andrew_Ferri
I was scared to death when my first wife was pregnant with my first kid. I wasn't
ready but maybe nobody is. I didn't want to have kids initially although now I'm
certainly glad that she's a healthy 13 years old. Shit, I can't believe it's been 13 years.

One time, while my ex was pregnant, she asked me to take out the garbage. I
grabbed the green bag and threw it down the incinerator then I did what I did every
single night during the entire period of her pregnancy. I went out and played poker all
night at the Mayfair Club on 25th Street and Madison. It was only later I realized what I
had done: I had thrown out the bag of all her post-pregnancy clothes. The specific
clothes that would fit her when her body was in between "here" and "there"" after
having the baby.
Of course I didn't tell her.
So it was only, post-baby, when she was getting ready for an Easter party, that
she realized she had no clothes. Zero. I had thrown them all out six months earlier. She
was upset. Very upset. Crying upset. I grabbed my baby and I didn't know what I was
going to do. I felt like holding onto the baby would be the only way to protect myself.
The baby was crying. I felt like if we both jumped out the window 21 floors up, then
this problem would be solved.
I didn't do that. I didn't do a lot of things. I would go out for a haircut and not
come back for five hours. I'd sit in the coffee shop across the street and read. Ahh,
peace and quiet. I'd call and say "there's a big line to get a haircut".
The whole relationship with my ex-wife changed when we started having kids. I
started to travel more. I kept playing poker. I went on a self-sabotage binge that cost
me all of my money, cost me the house we bought and rebuilt, cost me many hours
and months and years I could've spent with my child. I'm thinking about her right now,
all of 13, in her teenage new-hormone daze. How many months did I waste not getting
to know her better? Is it too late for me to make that up? I hope not.
I remember one time I went to drop her off when she was 18 months old at
some sort of kid-play-music thing. As I was walking out I heard her say in the tiniest,
squeakiest voice, "bye daddy." And it stopped me. She was waving. My eyes teared up.
And now I wonder. Will she ever miss me that way again. Will she ever need me
that way again. My eyes are tearing up.
Maybe some other time I'll have a top ten list.

How do you apply pacifism to being a father. My nephew lied to

me. And what good does it do him to just let it go? @bkharnish
As I write this, I'm upset at one of my kids. She was rude to me right after I took
her to a friend's party and picked her up at the party and then Claudia cooked dinner
and now she was using my computer to play games. Life was good for her and she was
still rude to me about something. What should I do? Here's what I will do:
I always have "office hours" with my kids. They can tell me anything bothering
them but I can also tell them.
If they behave really badly I tell them I'm disappointed in them and why. This
may or may not solve the problem right there.
If the behavior continues then I suspend certain privileges. Computers for
instance. Or phone for a week. This will work.
Sometimes there is nothing you can do. As kids get older they turn into their
own people. Maybe they are right about what they are saying about you or too
you or how they are behaving towards you. How do you know you are right?
Sometimes the misbehavior was their only way to express their feelings about an
oppressive system (You). So question your own behavior to. The people that you
love around you deserve that.

GOD
Do you believe in God? If so, which? @robbielaney
Unfortunately the word "God" has been bastardized. It started off as one thing
and then it's gone through the religion grinder, the New Age grinder, the self-help
grinder, the atheist grinder, the science grinder, and what's come out is a cartoon
character of an old man with infinite power who gets angry sometimes.
But yes. I believe that I am God. And so are you. The universe loves to create.
Ever since the Big Bang all the Universe has done is create. It created a bang, it created
dust, and stars, and galaxies and planets and life forms and brains. All of these atoms
stuck together in trillions of miraculous ways that created consciousness. It created you
and me.
We are experiments. The universe wants to try something. So it sliced a piece off
of itself and made you. It made me. Eventually we go back. And it/we keep making
things. Forever.
It's one big toy. And each toy is brought to life via the breath of god. Including
you and me. The breath brings us to life. The exhale brings us back Home. Where we
will all go? How do I know? I don't. But try for just a second to say, "whose body is
this?" Then, "whose thoughts are these?" Then, "who is the one asking this question?"
And go down that rabbit hole as deep as you can. Do that every day. Somewhere in
there, infinitely deep into that rabbit hole, is that initial breath that created everything,
that is the only thing inside of everything that exists, including you and me, just
different reflections in the same mirror.

MOTIVATION / SELF-PROMOTION
Best way to get motivated? @DoronGreenspan
It's very painful when you feel unmotivated. It's like the world is a merry go
round and everyone is having fun and you're just lying down on the ground, unable to
get on the ride. When I am unmotivated I can't get out of bed. There was one period in
the past three years where I look back on it and I can't even imagine what I was
thinking during the day. I did absolutely nothing. Zero. And as a result my entire life
turned upside down after just one month of doing nothing. But it turned around for the
better. And thank god I did nothing during that month. I needed to gather the strength.
You are really asking me two questions:
1) "Why am I feeling unmotivated?"
2) "How can I get more motivated?"
Forget motivation. There's a reason you are feeling unmotivated. You might not
like your job anymore. Or your spouse. Or your home. Or your entire life. Take a step
back. You aren't healthy. Something is not connecting.
In October, 2008 I was managing some money for a hedge fund. They were
getting me started and wanted to see how I would do. In September, a horrible month
for the markets, I was up. But in October I was down and I was very depressed about
it. I'd refuse to look at the quote screen. I'd lie down on my hammock outside and fall
asleep. I remember one time it started raining and I woke up. But I knew the market
was crashing and I was long stocks (I even bought Lehman Brothers at one point) so I
decided to just keep sleeping. When I finally woke I was soaking wet. Then I got sick
and I didn't want to get out of bed. I was unmotivated.
I had a down month and the guy who gave me the money called me. He said,
"I've been calling you ten times a day. Where have you been?" I told him I had no
excuse.

He said, "ok, I have to pull the money from you. It's not because you were down
on the month. Who cares. It's because you never called me back. If you want to be
good in this business, you have to be able to return phone calls and learn to
communicate." He was right. 4 years earlier I had helped him seed his own fund and
now he was much bigger and had just been doing me a favor and I had let him down.
At the same time I was trying to start another company. A crowdsourcing ad
agency called JungleSmash. You can see the results of it at junglesmash.blogspot.com
since I no longer have the domain name junglesmash.com. It was going well. But I lost
motivation for it. The guys from Freakonomics were helping me with it and I
disappointed them. Meanwhile, I couldn't focus on writing. I was moving houses AND
this is precisely when my marriage was disintegrating. Ultimately, by the end of October
I was mostly in random hotel rooms trying to figure out if I was ever going to see my
kids again. I was depressed. Nothing could motivate me.
What got me off the floor? Not trying to get motivated. But first trying to get
healthy.
I believe this: we have four bodies: physical (the obvious one), emotional,
mental, spiritual. They are all connected. There is virtual blood that flows between
them. There is a virtual heart in the middle. The blood is pumping through every
second. Any blockage in any body and you have a "heart attack", i.e. you get
depressed, unmotivated, unhappy, unwilling to relax, you feel anxious, you feel like
purposeless.
It's important to get back on track with each. In one post I recommend very lofty
goals to get each of the bodies in shape. But I take it back. Start with small goals. For
physical, maybe instead of: "working out, sleeping more, eating well" just do "don't
drink soda for one day" or "sleep 8 hours instead of six".
For emotional, instead of "get rid of all the crappy people in your life" try "next
time you are angry, put yourself in their shoes for ten seconds".
For mental, instead of "writing ten business ideas a day" how about "write one
idea".

For spiritual, instead of any kind of meditation or prayer, how about just "find
one thing you are grateful about today." Today I'm really grateful I get to answer this
question of yours.
When you do these things, it feels like you are doing a lot of activity. But what
actually happens is that all of your bodies get a little bit quieter. Over time the anxieties
and all the thoughts that spring back and forth like a ball in a pinball machine, starts to
get more and more silent and less active. This is what happens when you clean these
bodies.
It is out of this quietness that true motivation and ambition comes. It turns your
body into the transmitter for something else. Wait for the transmission. Wait for the
message. You won't need motivation then. Motivation will take you over and everyone
around you will feel the energy spilling forth.

What has been your most effective method of self-promotion? @davidrowyn

The most effective method of self-promotion is more self-less promotion.
There is no good method of self-promotion. If your focus is on getting yourself
noticed then make a sex tape and "accidentally" distribute it. For 10 years I wrote
about stocks, appeared on TV, managed money, wrote books, and started a company
about stockpicking which I sold to thestreet.com. Did it promote me? Perhaps a little.
And when the market went down, everyone hated me. When the market went up,
people liked me. I very much enjoyed being liked. I very much hated being hated.
CNBC's Erin Burnett show, where I had a regular spot, dropped me in early
2009. The Financial Times dropped me in early 2009. Thestreet.com dropped me in
early 2009. Yahoo Finance dropped me. On and on. And when the market started going
up again, they all wanted me on again. Even thestreet.com, made up of people who
actually hated me, asked me to start writing for them again.
This has been pretty hard being rejected by everyone. And not only that, during
that exact period I was going through a divorce, I was rebuilding the relationship with

my children, I was trying to survive financially, I was still regretting going broke
repeatedly in the 00s. 20 years of fighting the fight and suddenly everyone hated me. I
had fears of going broke again. Just like everyone, I had fears of the financial world
bringing the entire world down with it.
In November 2010 I decided, screw it, I just want to say what's on my mind. I
wanted to say I was scared also. I wanted to stop pretending. We now live in what I
call "The Choose Yourself Era". I'm sick of relying on other people to choose me.
Starting in 2010 I chose myself.
I started writing on this blog. I started making new friends. I started building
new business opportunities for myself and meeting new groups of people. Not just
people who were going to have me around to suit their own purposes but people who
respected what I had to say because they knew they were getting honest answers
based on my limited experiences in a variety of areas.
I told people it was okay to fail, because everyone fails. That it's ok to be
disappointed in yourself. Okay to be angry sometimes. Okay to not always achieve
every goal and that there are other ways to find happiness. Okay to sometimes be sad
because life is mostly about failure and sadness, punctuated with occasional success. I
gave my own methods for networking. I described my different businesses, the
successes and the failures. The things I was ashamed of. It made a difference. Without
planning it, I built trust.
Sometimes it's even alright to hate what you've become, to realize that 20 years
of hard work have put you in a place where you feel stuck and lonely. Everyone feels
this way sometimes. After working 100 hours a week for 15 years, I was mentally and
emotionally lost. I had to rebuild. Writing this blog helped me with that.
And when you relate to what everyone feels, and help them find permission
inside themselves to feel that way, and express this in forums and formats that
everyone reads (blogs, twitter, facebook, comments on other blogs, syndicate to other
blogs, books, etc) then this is effective self-promotion. You don't need one million
followers. Snooki needs that. You just need one person that you really, sincerely help.
Then they will share that help with someone else. And so on. And if you keep persisting
with the thought in mind that you are a radio transmitter for the feelings that are
always out there, always in the ether effecting everyone, then people will tune in and
hear your message. That is self-promotion.

CHESS
Has chess taught you more relevant things than school? More
worth the HUGE time investment you've put into both? @bell_er
I can write ten posts on this topic. I can write a book or two on this topic and
not one mention any actual chess game. I don't even know where to begin. Chess has
taught me so much.
But right now I will just write about one of the things chess has taught me. Last
night Claudia and I were in a dilemma. Every year for the past few years we've gone to
India in January-February. Claudia hates the cold weather. HATES IT. Honestly, I'm
worried if we stay up north during those months she might even divorce me, that's
how much she hates it, although she will deny that. And India has other benefits: yoga
classes, very cheap, we have a place to stay that is always available to us, the showers
in the Dubai waiting lounge in between flights, the food they serve on the plane on the
way back, the dosas, the cheap clothes pants I can buy that will fall apart after a year
but only cost $6 each.
But this January we have a problem. We are leading a three day workshop
starting January 18 at Kripalu. Kripalu is sort of a "wellness resort". It's a hotel where at
any given time various programs are happening that teach aspects of wellness in one
form or other. So no India this year. And Claudia is upset. She started thinking about
Florida but was suddenly coming up with all the negatives.
I had an idea. And it was an idea I learned from chess.
There's a book, "Think Like a Grandmaster" by Alexander Kotov, a successful
Russian grandmaster from the 1950s. For a great overview of Kotov's games I highly
recommend the book "Zurich International 1954" by Daniel Bronstein. One of the best
chess boks ever written.

But first, "Think Like a Grandmaster" is a must-read for every young chessplayer.
In the book he simply describes how a grandmaster thinks. He says a chessplayer
doesn't look at a position and immediately start analyzing deeply down one path, even
if it looks like the most obvious path.
First the grandmaster lists all his options, even if they seem totally ridiculous. List
as many possibilities as possible, even if a move looks horrible.
This is great advice. Florida, California, Argentina, India (why not?), South
Carolina, Africa, Italy, Mexico, all appeared on our list. We had lots of choices suddenly!
We kept trying to think of more. Maybe today we'll dive deep down each choice and
make a decision. Or not. It's nice to know we at least have many choices and one of
them will be a good one. We "thought like grandmasters" and in doing so, reduced
anxiety, gave ourselves many good choices, showed that the world was bigger than we
thought, and will eventually make a decision that will make our lives better and help our
minds to rest easy.
This is just one thing I learned from chess. In another post I will describe more.
But for now, whenever you have to make a complicated decision, take a step back and
see if you can think the way a grandmaster of life would think.

TWITTER Q&A
Biggest benefit from doing twitter Q + A's? ideas for writing, fun
interacting with readers, helps to build audience, other? @BillyMurph
I am an amateur at giving advice. I really love doing it. I look forward to
Thursdays. Into writing these posts. I hope I help some people. I tend to like the advice
I give, whether or not it's right or wrong. But at the end of the day I don't think there's
any real benefit to me other than that I just love doing it and it's always fun to do
things you love.

Any good methods for building twitter followers and interacting

with people? @adamkornfield
I look at my twitter follower count (and related to that: my facebook subscribers,
quora followers, klout score, comments on my blog posts, facebook likes on my blog
posts, etc) and I feel regret. Regret that I care. But I do care. I want people to like me.
I want people to think that my words have some impact. I want to have friends that
even in this very ephemeral way, stay in touch with me.
So I like to have more twitter followers even though I dislike that I want that.
And that's social media in a nutshell. We all want to connect. We want to be loved even
when other parts of our lives don't provide all the cravings we need. The cure for that is
to just be quiet. To understand that all the tweets in the world, all the Facebook
updates, add up to so much of nothing. They exist in 1s and 0s for a few seconds, and
then they disappear into some magical ether among the quadrillions of bytes of
information shared every day.

So while I hate myself for doing it: I do have an answer for your question. The
best way for building twitter followers is to give someone a gift. Somewhere, somehow
(a blog, a facebook post, engaging in a conversation in twitter, answering a question on
quora, etc deliver something of great quality - help someone out, provide someone
unique. And in that gift, include a card. The "card" says, "please follow me on Twitter".
That's the answer to your question. Ask people to follow you. Ask and you will
receive. Don't ask, and like most things in life, nobody is going to do you any favors.

What moves you to do this Q&A? Do you expect to retrieve some

info? Just interaction? @danibluebishop
When I was 12 years old I bought a collection of "Dear Abby" columns. She was
the biggest advice columnist ever. One question asked was by a woman who followed
her husband home from work one night. He stopped off at a strip club. At the strip club
he went into a back room with a stripper. When the man got home the woman
confronted him with what she saw. He said, "don't worry! The stripper was only doing
'sexual favors' and nothing else!" The woman asked "Abby" what she should do and
what did he mean by "sexual favors".
I actually forget what Abby responded. Nor do I remember any other question
from the book. But I remember thinking: wow, adults get "sexual favors" occasionally.
And, "I want a job like Dear Abby. I could be real good at this." All my life I wanted to
do that. I tried to major in Psychology but I got a D- and then a C- in my first two
classes so I wasn't allowed to major in it. And my father told me I would make no
money being a psychologist but I didn't care. I still wanted to be someone who could
give advice. So I read every book I could find on psychology, self-help, spirituality,
meditation, etc. And then I forgot it all while I started some companies and became
miserable for about twenty years. Now I want to try again.
I don't make money doing this. But thank you for letting me do this.

Connect With James @Jaltucher

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