BaconyTurkey

pooter01
https://gyazo.com/fd027300b189157bfe49a6684b782949
http://www.silver-islands.com/saitutorial
file:///C:/Users/special023/Downloads/POL_Strive%20for%20a%205%20Answer%20Key_Ch
apter%2029.pdf
bylinn.blogspot.com
http://osu.ppy.sh/s/241064
http://osu.ppy.sh/s/347312
Ways to describe myself:
Temperamental, vacuous, asocial, hypocritical, manipulative, selfish, egotistica
l, histrionic, cynical, spiteful, ignorant, pusillanimous, resentful, despondent
, apprehensive, prideful
...and horribly lonely. I just want to know if someone will understand the perso
n behind this fucked up farce :(
-----------------------------------------------------------------...What I usually say to people:
It's nothing, I'm fine ^^
Just being retarded lol
Nothing for you to worry about :)
There's no reason for me to be sad, so why am I sad? I've tried to analyze my ps
ychological behavior but I still can't even understand myself.
Everyone calls me their best friend, and yet I've never shown them how I serious
ly act. All I do is analyze their preferences, assume a role that compliments th
eir behavior, and evoke self-pity when necessary(to suit my overbearing ego, I p
resume). They will all abandon me someday, after their feelings diminish and cha
nge. After all, we are only human, the most disgustingly vile and fickle creatur
es I've ever seen. (1/18/16- I know for sure I'm never showing this to anyone, w
ill my emotions change within a few months? I fucking hate myself, so so so so S
O SO SO SO SO SO SO much)
My confessions:
I'm not suicidal, never have been, never tried it either
I was not bullied as a child, never was
I was never in a real fight before
I pretend to be treated terribly by my parents, but they're the nicest and best
parents ever, deserving more praise and loyalty than what I give them
I lie constantly to receive the best benefits/results
I did not care for my "friends" in AZ while messing with the Swedish boy
I know they care about me, I know they do, I know...but why am I not able to bel
ieve them?
My conversations with the Swedish boy were "planned", often delivering messages
in 1-2 day intervals
I want to run away from them all
I want to run away from everything
I want someone to read this
I want someone to understand without judging me
I'm scared of being judged
I'm scared of everyone
I say I don't need anyone, but is that really true?
I try to consider consequences of abandoning everyone, did not seem awful at all
to be honest

-Although I cannot stop seeing classmates at school

-I cannot stop seeing Melwin on Steam or osu!
If they were more fickle, this could've been easier
...and it would've hurt me a whole lot more
I hate myself I hate myself i hate myself i hatemyselfmihatemyselfihatemyselfiha
temyselfihatemyself
"Smile for mom, act scared to Tiff, act sad to Leah, act apologetic/caring to Me
lwin, act interested in computer science/math for dad, act silly to Michael, act
like I'm acting"
Am I acting? Or are these my true feelings? Or are they mixed?
-----------------------------------------------------------------https://suite.io/yolimari-garcia/5e792nn
I design/program games. They're never good.
~Can usually be seen playing RPGs not found on Steam
Stats:
CON- HP permanently set to 0
STR- On a scale of 0-10, I'd get a -1
DEX- Unbelievably clumsy *trips on own two feet*
INT- Decent.
WIS- Is known for making the worst split-second decisions
CHA- You'd feel more influenced talking to your shadow
Typical brain-dead sibling conversation:
https://gyazo.com/927e8daae45500b4ae429e4e597ad986
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------http://zeiva.tumblr.com/post/131098453982/mirage-ive-seen-many-people-try-on-lar
ge
(So true...)