DR. HORRIBLE’S
SING-ALONG BLOG
Music
Joss Whedon
Jed Whedon
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
Musical Numbers
#1. Horrible Theme……………………………………………..Instrumental
#2. My Freeze Ray………………………………………………..Dr. Horrible
#3. Bad Horse Chorus…………………………………….Bad Horse Chorus
#4. Caring Hands……………………………………………………..….Penny
#4a. Heist Incidental………………………………..…………..Instrumental
#5 A Man’s Gotta Do………….…Dr. Horrible, Penny, Captain Hammer
#6. My Eyes………………………………………………Dr. Horrible, Penny
#7. Bad Horse Chorus (Reprise)……………….………..Bad Horse Chorus
#8. Penny’s Song…………………………………………………………Penny
#9. Brand New Day……………………………………………….Dr. Horrible
#10. So They Say…………………………………………………….Ensemble
#11. Everyone’s a Hero…………………………………….Captain Hammer
#12. Slipping………………………………………………………Dr. Horrible
#13. Everything You Ever……………………………………….Dr. Horrible
#14. Horrible Credits (Bows)..……….………………….……..Instrumental
* Indicates a character whose gender can be changed.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
ACT ONE
The stage is dimly lit in red light. Visible in the dim lighting are two rooms. On
Stage Right is Dr. Horrible’s lab, with a camera set up on a desk. Against the
wall sits a couch, and on the other wall is mounted a dry erase board with a table
underneath it. On Stage Left, a Laundromat is seen, with two washers in the
center of the room, and a bench against the wall. A screen is seen hanging above
the stage. As the house lights dim, the red light grows more intense, and then
fades to black.
When the theme finishes playing, the lights in Dr. Horrible’s lab come up, and the
screen comes to life with a live video projection of DR. HORRIBLE. He is making
another entry for his online blog.
SCENE 1-1
(pause)
“Where are the gold bars you were supposed to pull out of that bank vault with your
trans-matter ray? Obviously it failed or it would be in the papers.” Well no, they’re not
going to say anything in the press. But, BEHOLD. Transported from there to here.
(DR. HORRIBLE reaches off camera and brings into view a Ziploc bag with a
metallic looking liquid inside. He pokes at it)
The molecules tend to shift during the trans-matter... um... event, but they were
transported IN BAR FORM and they clearly were...
3
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
And by the way it's not about making money. It's about TAKING money. Destroying the
status quo because the "status" is NOT "quo". The world is a mess and I just need to
RULE it. I'm gonna...
That smells like cumin. So, Trans-matter is 75% AND more importantly the Freeze-Ray
is almost up. This is the one. Stops time. Freeze-ray. Tell your friends. We have... OH!
Here's one from our good friend Johnny Snow. "Dr. Horrible. I see you are once again
afraid to do battle with your nemesis. I waited at Dooley Park for 45 minutes..."Ok,
DUDE you're NOT my nemesis. My nemesis is Captain Hammer. Captain Hammer,
Corporate TOOL. He dislocated my shoulder... again... last week. LOOK! I'm just trying
to change the world, OK? I don't have time for a grudge match with every poser in a
parka. Besides, there's kids in that park, so... Here's one from DeadNotSleeping. "Long
time watcher, first time writing." Blah blah blah blah... "You always say on your blog
that you will 'show her the way, show her you are a true villain'. Who is 'her' and does she
even know that you're”...
As DR. HORRIBLE is reading the letter, he trails off. As this happens, the
Laundromat becomes illuminated, and we can see Penny doing laundry.
DR. HORRIBLE
LAUNDRY DAY, SEE YOU THERE
UNDERTHINGS, TUMBLING
WANNA SAY, LOVE YOUR HAIR
HERE I GO, MUMBLING
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
What?
DR. HORRIBLE
No, I, I, I love the, uh, air. Heh heh.
ANYWAY, WITH MY FREEZE RAY I WILL STOP...
SCENE 1-2
As the song is ending, the lights on the Laundromat fade out. MOIST, Dr.
Horrible’s evil henchman, enters the lab, interrupting and ending DR.
HORRIBLE'S song.
MOIST
Hey Doc.
DR. HORRIBLE
Moist! My evil, moisture buddy. What's going on?
MOIST
Life of crime. Got your mail.
(MOIST hands DR. HORRIBLE a stack of soggy mail. He goes and sits on the
couch.)
DR. HORRIBLE
Hey, didn't you, uh, didn't you go on a date last night? Conflict Diamond told me you
were doubling with Bait'N'Switch.
MOIST
Yeah...
DR. HORRIBLE
Yeah?
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
MOIST
It was alright. I kinda thought I was supposed to end up with Bait, but...
DR. HORRIBLE
I hear ya. I saw Penny today.
MOIST
You talk to her?
MOIST
Is that from the League?
DR. HORRIBLE
It's from him! That's his seal, isn't it?
(At this, DR. HORRIBLE holds up a letter with a seal of a horseshoe on the back)
MOIST
The leader! Oh my god…
DR. HORRIBLE
I got a letter from Bad Horse.
MOIST
That's so hardcore. Bad Horse is legend, he rules the League with an iron hoof, are you
sure you wanna...
MOIST is suddenly cut off by the appearance of the BAD HORSE CHORUS. They
are dressed in western attire, and the form a group around DR. HORRIBLE and
sing the contents of the letter.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
SCENE 1-3
As the BAD HORSE CHORUS is finishing the song, they are exiting through the
door. They say their last line and the abruptly close the door. There is an
awkward silence before MOIST continues.
MOIST
It's not a "no"...
DR. HORRIBLE
Are you kidding? This is great! I am about to pull a major heist. You know the
Wonderflonium I need for the Freeze Ray? It's being transported tomorrow.
MOIST
Armored car?
DR. HORRIBLE
Courier van. Candy from a baby.
MOIST
You need anything dampened, or made soggy, or...?
DR. HORRIBLE
Thanks, but the League is watching. I gotta go this alone.
SCENE 2-1
The stage goes dark. SCENE 2-1 and SCENE 2-2 are all pre-recorded, and so are
projected on the screen. When the screen illuminates, we see PENNY on the
sidewalk, holding a clipboard and attempting to hand out fliers, though no one
takes them.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
WILL YOU LEND A CARING HAND,
TO SHELTER THOSE WHO NEED IT?
ONLY HAVE TO SIGN YOUR NAME
DON'T EVEN HAVE TO READ IT.
WOULD YOU HELP?
No? How 'bout you?
SCENE 2-2
The scene shifts, revealing DR. HORRIBLE in his BILLY persona. He has a duffel
bag and looks down the alley to see a van parked outside a building. He pulls out
a receiver that will allow him to remote control and throws it towards the van.
The receiver attaches itself to the van. BILLY pulls out the remote control and
activates the receiver. As he's looking at the remote control, PENNY walks up
behind him, singing a bar from “CARING HANDS”.
PENNY
WILL YOU LEND A CARING HAN-...
BILLY (startled)
Ah! Aaah!
BILLY
Ah! Ah! Hah! What?
PENNY
I, I was wondering if I could just... Hey, I know you!
BILLY
Hello. You know me? Cool. I mean, yeah, you do. Do you?
PENNY
From the Laundromat?
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
I'm Penny.
(PENNY notices that BILLY doesn’t really look up from his “phone”)
BILLY
Texting. It’s very important or I would stop. What are you doing?
PENNY
Actually I’m out here volunteering for the Caring Hands Homeless Shelter. Can you
spare a minute?
PENNY
OK, umm, we’re hoping to open up a new location soon, expand our efforts. There’s this
great building nearby that the city is just going to demolish and turn into a parking lot,
but if we get enough signatures...
BILLY (condescendingly)
Signatures? *pfft*
PENNY
Yeah.
BILLY
I'm sorry, go on.
PENNY
I was saying, um, maybe we could get the city to donate the building to our cause. We
would be able to provide 250 new beds,
Get people off the streets and into job training so they could... buy rocket packs and go to
the moon and become... florists... You’re not really interested in the homeless, are you?
BILLY
No, I am. But they’re a symptom. You’re treating a symptom and the disease rages on,
consumes the human race. The fish rots from the head as they say. So my thinking is why
not cut off the head?
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
Of the human race?
BILLY
It's not a... perfect... metaphor. But I'm talking about an overhaul of the system. Putting
the power in... DIFFERENT... hands.
PENNY
I'm all for that... this petition is about the building...
BILLY
I'd love to sign.
PENNY
Thank you.
BILLY
Sorry I... I come on strong.
PENNY
But you signed.
BILLY
Wouldn’t want to turn my back on a fellow laundry person...
PENNY
Well if WE can’t stick together I don’t... I’ll probably see you there.
BILLY
No, I will, I'll...
She talked to me. Why did she talk to me now? Maybe I should...
BILLY considers whether or not he should go talk to PENNY, but his need to join
the Evil League of Evil overpowers his want of PENNY, and he decides to carry out his
plan. Partway through his lines, BILLY stoops down, and a second later remerges as DR.
HORRIBLE.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
BILLY
CAPTAIN HAMMER
DR. HORRIBLE
You idiot!
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Dr. Horrible. I should have know you were behind this.
DR. HORRIBLE
You almost killed her!
CAPTAIN HAMMER
I remember it differently.
DR. HORRIBLE
Is she... *ugh*
CAPTAIN HAMMER
It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, gently wafting curtains.
DR. HORRIBLE
Whuh?
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
THANK YOU HAMMER MAN,
I DON'T THINK I CAN
EXPLAIN HOW IMPORTANT IT WAS
THAT YOU STOPPED THE VAN
I WOULD BE SPLATTERED,
I'D BE CRUSHED INTO DEBRIS
THANK YOU SIR FOR SAVING ME
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Don't worry about it.
Dr. Horrible:
Balls!
END ACT I
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
ACT II
BILLY
ANY DOLT WITH HALF A BRAIN,
CAN SEE THAT HUMAN KIND HAS GONE INSANE,
TO THE POINT WHERE I DON'T KNOW
IF I'LL UPSET THE STATUS QUO
IF I THROW POISON IN THE WATER MAIN.
(Up stage left becomes lit and PENNY is visible, a homeless shelter can be
discerned from tables and homeless people eating at them. PENNY is sitting with
CAPTAIN HAMMER.)
PENNY
LOOK AROUND, WE'RE LIVING WITH THE LOST AND FOUND
JUST WHEN YOU FEEL YOU'VE ALMOST DROWNED
YOU FIND YOURSELF ON SOLID GROUND
13
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
BILLY
PENNY
ANYONE
WITH
HALF
A
BRAIN
TAKE
IT
SLOW
COULD
SPEND
THEIR
WHOLE
LIFE
HOWLING
IN
PAIN
HE
LOOKS
AT
ME
AND
SEEMS
TO
KNOW
CAUSE
THE
DARK
IS
EVERYWHERE
AND
PENNY
THE
THINGS
THAT
I’M
AFRAID
TO
SHOW
DOESN’T
SEEM
TO
CARE
THAT
SOON
THE
DARK
IN
AND
SUDDENLY
I
FEEL
ME
IS
ALL
THAT
WILL
REMAIN
THIS
GLOW
AND
I
BELIEVE
LISTEN
CLOSE
TO
EV’RYBODY’S
HEART
THERE’S
GOOD
IN
EV’RYBODY’S
HEART
AND
HEAR
THAT
BREAKING
SOUND
KEEP
IT
SAFE
AND
SOUND
HOPES
AND
DREAMS
ARE
SHATTERING
APART
WITH
HOPE
YOU
CAN
DO
YOUR
PART
AND
CRASHING
TO
THE
GROUND
TO
TURN
A
LIFE
AROUND
I
CAN
NOT
BELIEVE
MY
EYES
I
CAN
NOT
BELIEVE
MY
EYES
HOW
THE
WORLD’S
FILLED
WITH
FILTH
AND
LIES
HOW
THE
WORLD’S
FIN’LLY
GROWING
WISE
BUT
IT’S
PLAIN
TO
SEE
AND
IT’S
PLAIN
TO
SEE
EVIL
INSIDE
OF
ME
RAPTURE
INSIDE
OF
ME
IS
ON
THE
RISE
IS
ON
THE
RISE
SCENE 1-1
The lights go to blackout on the bump at the end of “My Eyes”. Stage left
becomes lit; BILLY and PENNY are doing laundry.
PENNY
It is so dumb that we have been coming here for so long and never spoke.
BILLY
I know, all those months doing a stunningly boring chore.
PENNY
I'm a fan of laundry.
BILLY
Psyche! I love it!
PENNY
The smell of fabric softener.
BILLY
MMmmm.
PENNY
The feel of warm clothes in your hands.
BILLY
So good.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
BILLY gets a bag of frozen yogurt and reaches in and pulls out two frozen
yogurts.
BILLY
Hey, this is weird. I ordered one frozen yogurt and they gave me two. You don't happen
to like frozen yogurt, do you?
PENNY
I love it.
BILLY
You're kidding? What a crazy random happenstance! Here.
PENNY
Thank you.
BILLY
So how was your weekend? Did you spend the whole time hunting wild signatures?
PENNY
Um, actually, I went on a date...
BILLY
Get right outta town. How was that?
PENNY
Unexpected. He's a really good-looking guy, and I thought he was kinda cheesy at first...
BILLY (Interrupting)
Trust your instincts
PENNY
But, he turned out to be totally sweet. Sometimes people are layered like that. There's
something totally different underneath than what's on the surface.
BILLY
And sometimes there's a third, even deeper level and that one is the same as the top
surface one.
PENNY
Huh?
BILLY
Like with pie. So are you gonna see him again?
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
I think I will...
BILLY
Huh
PENNY
Billy?
BILLY
Yeah?
PENNY
You're driving the spork into your leg.
BILLY
So I am. Hilarious. Heh heh heh heh.
SCENE 2-1
DR. HORRIBLE
All right. The wait is over. This, my friends, is my Freeze Ray, which, with the addition
of the Wonderflonium I obtained at my famously successful heist last week... I say
successful in that I achieved my objective. It was less successful in that I inadvertently
introduced my arch-nemesis to the girl of my dreams, and now he's taking her out on
dates, and they're probably going to French kiss or something. She called him sweet.
How is he sweet? RIGHT. Freeze Ray. SO as of tonight I am in the Evil League of Evil if
all goes according to plan; which it WILL because I hold a PhD in Horribleness. See you
at the aftermath. PEACE!
SCENE 2-2
The stage goes dark. When the lights come back on, DR. HORRIBLE'S lab is
visible, along with DR. HORRIBLE. He is disheveled.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
DR. HORRIBLE
*cough* ahem. The Freeze Ray needs work. I also need to be a LITTLE bit more careful
about what I say on this blog. Apparently the L.A.P.D and Captain Hammer are among
our viewers. They were waiting for me at the Mayor's dedication of the Superhero
Memorial Bridge. The Freeze Ray takes a few seconds to warm up and I wasn't... Captain
Hammer threw a car at my head. Not to worry though, because I'm…
SCENE 3-1
Blackout, and then the lights fade back up. In DR. HORRIBLE'S lab. MOIST is
trying to open a jar.
MOIST
Kill someone?
DR. HORRIBLE
Would you do it? To get into the Evil League of Evil?
MOIST
Look at me man. I'm Moist. At my most badass I make people feel like they wanna take a
shower. I'm not E.L.E. material.
DR. HORRIBLE
Killing's not elegant or creative. It's not my style.
MOIST
You've got more than enough evil hours to get into the Henchman's Union.
DR. HORRIBLE
*PSSH* I'm not a henchman. I'm Dr. Horrible; I've got a PhD in Horribleness.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
MOIST
Is that the new catchphrase?
DR. HORRIBLE
I deserve to get in; you know I do. But killing?
MOIST
Hourglass says she knows a kid in Iowa, grows up to be President. That'd be... big.
DR. HORRIBLE
I'm not gonna kill a little kid.
MOIST
Smother an old lady!
DR. HORRIBLE
Do I even know you?!
SCENE 4-1
Blockout. The screen lights up and we see DR. HORRIBLE practicing his evil
laugh; this will give the actor time to change from DR. HORRIBLE to BILLY. BILLY and
PENNY are sitting on top of the laundry machines eating frozen yogurt.
BILLY
I just, you know, really think I'm qualified for this job, and, I just can't get my foot in the
door.
PENNY
I'm sure you will.
BILLY
I wanna do great things, you know? I wanna be an achiever, like Bad Horse.
PENNY
The Thoroughbred of Sin?
BILLY
I meant Gandhi.
PENNY
Well, I've gotten turned down from plenty of jobs. Even fired a few times.
BILLY
I can't imagine anybody firing you.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
Neither could I. Now I can visualize it really well. But you know, everything happens...
Billy: (interrupting)
Don't say for a reason.
PENNY
No, I'm just saying that, everything happens.
BILLY
Not to me.
PENNY
HERE'S A STORY OF A GIRL,
WHO GREW UP LOST AND LONELY,
THINKIN' LOVE WAS FAIRY TALE,
AND TROUBLE WAS MADE ONLY FOR ME.
SCENE 4-2
By this point, BILLY and PENNY are both seated on the bench. They go for a kiss,
but then PENNY decides against it.
PENNY
It's like Captain Hammer's always saying.
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Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
BILLY
*Pssh* Right. Him. How are things with Cheesy-On-The-Outside?
PENNY
Good. They’re good. He's nice. I'll be interested to know what you think of him; he said
he might stop by.
BILLY
Stop by here?
PENNY
Yeah.
BILLY
Oh, goodness, look at my wrist. I gotta go.
PENNY
But, but what about your clothes?
BILLY
I don't love these. See ya!
(BILLY turns around and runs into CAPTAIN HAMMER, who has just walked in
the door.)
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Oh! Pardon.
BILLY
Pardon.
PENNY
Um, Billy, this is Captain Hammer.
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Ah! Billy, the laundry buddy. Well, it is very nice to meet you.
BILLY
We're meeting now for the first time.
CAPTAIN HAMMER
You look horribly familiar.
BILLY
One of those faces I guess.
20
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Have I seen you at the gym?
BILLY
At the gym...
CAPTAIN HAMMER
I don't go to the gym; I'm just naturally like this. Oh well. Who wants to know what the
mayor is doing behind closed doors? He is signing over a certain building to a Caring
Hands group as a new homeless shelter.
PENNY
Oh my god!
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Yep. Apparently the only signature he needed was my fist. But with a pen in it, that I was
signing with...
PENNY
I— I can't believe it.
BILLY
Congratulations.
PENNY
Thank you! Thank you!
(PENNY kisses CAPTAIN HAMMER in thanks. The buzzer for her laundry goes
off.)
Oh!
BILLY
Well, this is great. I wish I could stay and chitchat.
(BILLY attempts to leave, but CAPTAIN HAMMER grabs him by the shoulder and
spins him around)
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Well, it sure was nice to meet you, Doctor. You got a little crush, don't you Doc? Well
that’s gonna make this hard to hear. See, later I'm gonna take little Penny back to my
place. Show her the command center, Hammer-cycle, maybe even the Ham-Jet. You
think she likes me now? I'm gonna give Penny the night of her life, just because you want
her. And I get what you want. See, Penny's giving it up, she's giving it up hard. 'Cause
she's with Cap'n Hammer.
21
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
(CAPTAIN HAMMER starts to walk away, and then returns after a second)
BILLY stands in place. An evil grin comes across his face as the song begins.
BILLY
THIS APPEARED AS A MORAL DILEMMA
CAUSE AT FIRST IT WAS WEIRD
THOUGH I SWORE TO ELIMINATE
THE WORST OF THE PLAGUE THAT DEVOURED HUMANITY
IT'S, TRUE. I WAS VAGUE ON THE HOW
SO CAN IT BE THAT YOU HAVE SHOWN ME THE LIGHT?
22
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
END ACT II
23
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
ACT III
SCENE 1-1
NEWSWOMAN
Looks like we're finding out what a true hero is.
NEWSMAN
The mayor himself will be on-hand to dedicate the new homeless shelter and unveil the
statue of Captain Hammer.
NEWSWOMAN
It's a good day to be homeless.
NEWSMAN
Ha ha ha! It certainly is.
The lights come up on stage. The lamppost is pre-set for the groupies. DR.
HORRIBLE is working in his lab on a Death Ray, and PENNY and CAPTAIN
HAMMER are in the homeless shelter.
MOVING GUY
SO THEY SAY CAPTAIN HAMMER'S BECOME A CRUSADER
POLITICAL, HE'S CLEANING UP THE STREETS
GROUPIE #1
SO THEY SAY THAT IT'S REAL LOVE
GROUPIES
SO ROMANTIC
GROUPIE #2
HE SIGNED THIS
PENNY
SO THEY SAY WE'LL HAVE BLANKETS AND BEDS
WE CAN OPEN BY MONDAY, THANKS TO YOU
24
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
CAPTAIN HAMMER
THANKS TO ME!
NEWSMAN
SO THEY SAY
NEWSWOMAN
A HERO LEADING THE WAY
NEWSWOMAN
LET'S ALL BE OUR BEST
NEWSMAN
NEXT UP, WHO'S GAY?
GROUPIE #3
SO THEY SAY HE SAVED HER LIFE
GROUPIE #1
THEY SAY SHE WORKS WITH THE HOMELESS
AND DOESN'T EAT MEAT, WE HAVE A
GROUPIES
PROBLEM WITH HER
GROUPIE #2
THIS IS HIS HAIR
CAPTAIN HAMMER
THIS IS SO NICE,
I JUST MIGHT SLEEP WITH THE SAME GIRL TWICE,
THEY SAY IT'S BETTER THE SECOND TIME,
THEY SAY YOU GET TO DO THE WEIRD STUFF.
GROUPIES
WE DO THE WEIRD STUFF.
25
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
PENNY
THIS IS PERFECT FOR ME,
SO THEY SAY, I GUESS HE'S PRETTY OK,
AFTER YEARS OF STORMY SAILING
HAVE I FINALLY FOUND THE BAY?
GROUPIE #2
THIS IS HIS DRY-CLEANING BILL
GROUPIES
FOR A SWEATER VEST!
SCENE 1-2
As "So They Say" ends, the light fades on the GROUPIES, and they carry out the
lamppost. The main curtain comes down, and the stage is set for the dedication.
As the light fades back up, the MAYOR starts to speak at the podium. A “statue”
is covered on stage left.
MAYOR
And in just a few minutes, we'll unveil the statue of the man himself. Thank you. Thank
you. Justice has a name, and the name that it has, besides Justice, is Captain Hammer.
Ladies and Gentlemen, your hero!
CAPTAIN HAMMER
Thank you. Thank you Mayor for those kind words.
(CAPTAIN HAMMER begins to read his speech off of cue cards, causing his
words to be cut off)
26
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
CAPTAIN HAMMER
IT MAY NOT FEEL TOO CLASSY,
BEGGING JUST TO EAT.
BUT YOU KNOW WHO DOES THAT? LASSIE.
AND SHE ALWAYS GETS A TREAT.
27
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
(As CAPTAIN HAMMER is saying this line, DR. HORRIBLE comes out from
under the sheet that is supposed to be the statue, and he shoots CAPTAIN
HAMMER with the Freeze Ray)
DR. HORRIBLE
Mmhmhmhmhmhahahahaha.
28
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
(DR. HORRIBLE grabs his Death ray from the platform and fires it into the air.)
BURN!
29
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
SCENE 1-3
DR. HORRIBLE
That's not a good sound.
(CAPTAIN HAMMER punches DR. HORRIBLE, sending him and the Death Ray
flying back. CAPTAIN HAMMER walks over and picks up the Death Ray, puts his
foot on DR. HORRIBLE, and finishes "EVERYONE'S A HERO")
CAPTAIN HAMMER
WAY!
A Death Ray. Looks like Dr. Horrible's moving up. Let's see if this one works any better
than your others.
DR. HORRIBLE
Don't…
(CAPTAIN HAMMER fires the Death Ray, but it backfires and sends him flying
backwards. The Death Ray shatters.)
AAAGGGHHHH! I'm in pain! I think this is what pain feels like. Oh mama! Someone
maternal! Get out of my way!
(CAPTAIN HAMMER exits DR. HORRIBLE gets up and looks around. He looks
over to see that PENNY has been struck by the shrapnel of the Death Ray. DR.
HORRIBLE runs over to her.)
DR. HORRIBLE
Penny! Penny! Penny.
PENNY
Billy? Is that you?
DR. HORRIBLE
Penny, hold on. Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
PENNY
Billy? Are you alright?
30
Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
DR. HORRIBLE
Hold on.
PENNY
It's ok. It's ok. Captain Hammer will save us.
(PENNY dies. DR. HORRIBLE tries to speak, but incoherent starts of words come
out. He stands up, and reporters come up to him with cameras.)
DR. HORRIBLE
HERE LIES EVERYTHING,
THE WORLD I WANTED AT MY FEET,
MY VICTORY'S COMPLETE,
SO HAIL TO THE KING.
ARISE AND SING.
(DR. HORRIBLE leaves stage to change back into his Billy persona, the lights
grow dim, and the following is the on screen: when Dr. Horrible is at the party,
changing his outfit, and going into the conference room of the E.L.E.)
(BILLY is sitting on a washing machine when the lights come on suddenly for the
last line)
BILLY
A THING.
CURTAIN
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