Comic Latin Grammar

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THE COMIC
LATIN GRAMMAR;
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CO
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"Z'i
LATIN TONGUE.
WITH NUMEROUS ILLUSTRATIONS.
THE SECOND EDITION.
r LONDON:
CHARLES
TILT,
5 *
t/
FLEET STREET.
Fff
1S4O
COE, PRINTER, 27, OLD CHANGE, ST. PAUL'S.
ADVERTISEMENT
TO THE SECOND EDITION.
The Author
edition of
it
of this
little
work cannot allow a second

unaccompanied
to
go forth
to the world,
by a few words
of apology, he being desirous of
imitating, in every respect, the
example of
distin-
guished writers.
He
ally
begs that so much as the consciousness of

for
being answerable
a great deal of nonsense, usu-
prompts a man
to say, in the
hope of disarming have been said

tlie
criticism,
may
be considered
particularly
to
already.
But he
requests that
want
of additions to his
book
may be
excused
and
ADVERTISEMENT.
pleads, in arrest of judgment, his
numerous and
absorbing avocations.
Wishing
deficiency,
to atone as
much
as possible for this
and prevailed upon by the importunity
of his friends, he has allowed a portrait of himself,
by
he
that eminent artist,

is
Mr. John Leech,
to
whom
indebted
for
the embellishments,
and very
probably
for the sale of the book, to
be presented,
facing the title-page, to the public.
Here again he has been

to
influenced
by the wish
comply
Avith the requisitions of
custom, and the
disinclination to appear odd, whimsical, or peculiar.
On
the
admirable sketch
itself,
bare justice
in detail.
requires that he should speak
somewhat
The
likeness he
is
told,
he fears by too partial

principle on
admirers,
is excellent.
The
which
it
has been executed, that of investing with an ideal

magnitude, the proportions of nature,
is
plainly,
from what
we
observe in heroic poetry, painting,

itself of the
and sculpture, the soul
superhuman
ADVERTISEMENT.
and sublime.
Of the
justness of the metaphorical
compliment implied
it is
in the delineation of the head,

;
not for the author to speak

is
of
its
exquisite-
ness and delicacy, his sense

sion.
too strong for expres-
The
habitual pensiveness of the
elevated
eyebrows, mingled with the momentary gaiety of

the rest of the countenance,
cessful points in
is
one of the most suc-
the picture,
and
is
as tiue to
nature as
it is
indicative of art.
The Author's
reasons
tailor,
though there are certain

not appear in print,
why
his
name should
desires to
artist
express his
obligation to the talented
for the
very favourable impression which,

to
without prejudice to truth, has been given

public of his
skill.
the
The
ease so conspicuous in the
management
of the surtout,
and the thought so

fully
remarkable in the treatment of the trousers,

warrant his admiration and gratitude.
Too great praise cannot be bestowed on the

considered with reference
respect the Author
is
boots,
this
to
art,
though in
quite sensible that both him-
ADVERTISEMENT.
self
and the maker
ol'
their originals
have been
greatly flattered.
there
ill
He
is
also perfectly
aware
that
is
a degree of neatness, elegance, and spirit
the tie of the cravat, to which he has in reality

to attain.
never yet been able
In conclusion, he
is
much
gratified
by the
taste
displayed in furnishing him with so handsome a
walking stick
and he assures
all
whom
it
may
concern, that the hint thus bestowed will not be lost
upon him
for
he intends immediately
to relinquish
the large oaken cudgel
which he has hitherto been
accustomed
to
carry,
and
to
appear,
in
every
respect, to the present generation,
such as he will
descend
to posterity.
PREFACE.
GREAT
book, says an old proverb,
is
a great evil;
is
and a great preface, says a

bore.
It is not, therefore,
new
one,
a great
our intention to expatiate

;
largely on the present occasion
especially
since a
is like
long discourse prefixed to a small volume,
forty-eight pounder at the door of a pig- stye.
We
should as soon think of erecting the Nelson

rial in front
it
Memo-
of
Buckingham Palace.
show some kind
Indeed, were
of respect to
not necessary to
fashion,
things,
we
should hasten at once into the midst of
instead of trespassing on the patience of

trifling
our readers, and possibly,
Avith their time.
We
fare.
should not like to be kept waiting at a Lord

feast
Mayor's
by a long
description of the bill of

at
Our
preface,
;
however, shall
is shall
least
have
the merit of novelty
be candid.
This book, like the razors in Dr. Wolcot's story,

is
made
to sell.
This
last
word has a
rather equi-
vocal meaning
but
we
scorn to blot, otherwise
we
should say to be sold.
An
article offered for

;
sale
and it is may, nevertheless, be worth buying the resemblance between the aforesaid hoped that
A 2
4
razors,
PREFACE.
and
this our production, does not
extend
to
the respective 57m;7;e55 of the

razors proved
commodities.
to
The
the
scarcely
worth a farthing
for
clown who bought them
eighteen-pence, and
were
fit
to
shave nothing but the beard of an oyster.
We
least,
trust that the "

to cut,
Comic Latin Grammar"

then, rather better,
that
it
will
be found
now and
;
at
than that comes to

at
and
will
reward
the purchaser,
for
any
its
rate,
with his pennyworth

fide
his penny,
by
genuine bona
contents.
There are many works, the pages of which contain

a
good deal of useful matter
sometimes
in
:
the
shape of an ounce of tea or a pound of butter
we
venture to indulge the expectation, that these latter

additions to the value of our own, will be considered
unnecessary.
Perhaps we should have adopted

" Latin in sport
the
title
of
made
learning in earnest"
which
bear
the
;
would give a tolerable idea of the nature of our

undertaking.
the
The
doctrine,
it
is
true,
may
same
relation to the lighter
matter, that
bread
in Falstaff's private
if
account did to the liquor
though
Ave
we have given our reader " a deal of sack," wish it may not be altogether "intolerable.''
is
Latin, however,
a great deal less like bread, to

like
most boys, than
it is
physic
especially anti-
mony, ipecacuanha, and similar
medicines.
It
ought, therefore, to be given in something palatable.
PREFACE.
and capable of causing
it
O
by
the
to be retained
call to
mind
This
in
what physicians
a pleasant vehicle.
invent
we have endeavoured
and
if
we
have disguised the flavour of the drugs without

destroying their virtues,
we
shall
have entirely
parti-
accomplished our design.

cularly
There are a few

boluses,
nasty
pills,
draughts, and
which
we
could find no
means of sweetening; and with
which, on that account,
meddle.
For these
we have not attempted to omissions we must request

Our performance
it
some
little
indulgence.
is
con-
fessedly imperfect, but be

"
remembered, that
weapons
use,
Men
Than
rather do their broken

their bare hands."
The " Comic Latin Grammar"

never be
called
can,
certainly,
an
imposition, as another Latin

is.
Grammar
frequently
it to
We
remember having
the
had the whole of
learn at school, besides being

for
no
matter
what
pinning a cracker
hint
is
to
master's coat-tail.
attention of boys
;
The above
worthy the
nor will the following, probably^
be thrown away upon school-masters, particularly

such
as reside in the north of England.
fat,"
is
"
Laugh
(like
and grow
an ancient and a true maxim.
Now,
will not the "
Comic Latin Grammar,"

to the breakfast of the
Scotch marmalade and Yarmouth bloaters) form a

" desirable addition"
young
K 3
6
gentlemen entrusted
say
PREFACE.
to
their
care
We
dare not
much
hold
of
its
superseding the use of the cane, as
we
to
all
old established customs in the
utmost
reverence and
deprive any
respect; and, besides, have no wish
one of innocent amusement.

flagellation is
We
would only suggest, that

optional may,
now some-
limes necessary, and that whatever tends to render

it
now and
then, save trouble.
One word
is
in conclusion.
The march
;
of intellect
not confined to the male sex
the fairer part of

their
the creation are
now augmenting by
their
numbers,
and adorning by and
countenance, the scientific

the
literary train.
But
for
path of learning
feet.
;
is
sometimes too rugged

pretend not
to
their tender
We
are
strew
it
for
them with roses
we
not poetically given
nay,
;
we
cannot even promise

if
them a Brussels carpet
but
a plain Kidderhere display one
minster will serve their turn,

for
we
their
accommodation, that thus smoothly and
pleasantly they
may make
their safe ascent to the
temple of Minerva and the Muses.
INTRODUCTION.
Very
little
introductory matter would probably be
sufficient to place the rising generation
on terms of
the most perfect familiarity
with a " Comic Latin
Grammar."
a
To
the elder and middle-aged portion
of the community, however, the very notion of such
work may seem

;
in the highest degree prepos-
terous
if
not indicative of a degree of presumptuous
irreverence on the part of the

literary high treason, if not
author
little
short of
in point
commensurate,
the
of moral
delinquency,
the
with
same crime
It is
as
defined
of
by
common law
for
of England.
out
consideration
the
praiseworthy,
though
perhaps erroneous, feelings of

personages, that
such respectable
the following
we proceed
to
make
preliminary remarks; wherein
it
will be our object,
by demonstrating
ourselves from
duction.
all
the necessity which exists for
such a publication as
the present, to exonerate

its
blame on the score of
pro-
When we
consider
the progress of civilization
and refinement, we
find that all ages
have
in turn
INTRODUCTION.
been characterized by some one distinctive peculiarity
or
other.
To say nothing
of the
Golden
forth,
Age, the Silver Age, the Iron Age, and so

which,
scarcely
with
all possible respect for the poets,
can
be said
;
to
be
worth much in a grave
argument
it is
quite clear that the
Augustan Age,
Age, and the
the Middle Ages,
the Elizabethan
all
Age
of
Queen Anne, were
of
them very
dif-
ferent,
one from the other, in regard
to the peculiar
tone of feeling which distinguished the public

in
mind
each of them.
In
like
manner, the
present
(which will hereafter probably be called the Victorian

it.
Age)
is
very unlike
be
all
that
have preceded
of Comicality.
It
may
that
termed the
Age
Not but
as
it
some traces of comic
feeling, inherent
is in
the very nature of man, have not at all

;
times been more or less observable
but
it
is
only
of late years that the ludicrous capabilities of the
human mind have expanded
in their fullest vigour.

it
Comicality has heretofore been evinced only, as
were, in isolated sparks and flashes, instead of that

full
blaze of meridian splendour which
now pervades
all
the entire
mechanism of
life.
society,
and illuminates
the transactions of
there
Thus
in the
Golden Age,
tures eating acorns, like pigs.
was something very comical in human creaThe Augustan Age

if
was comical enough,

Horace's
satires.
we may
comicality
trust
some of
Much
was displayed
:;
INTRODUCTION.
in
the
Middle Ages,
the
in
the
proceedings of the
Palestine,
knights errant,
doings in
and the
mode adopted by
on the
the priests of inculcating religion

In the Elizabethan
minds of the people.
Age
several
comic incidents occurred at court

of the courtiers were guilty
It
particularly
when any
of personal impertinence to their virgin queen.
must have been very comical

holding stirrups like an ostler,
part
to
see Shakspere
or
performing the
of
of the dress
first
Ghost, in his
in
own play
Hamlet.
The
the
Queen Anne's time, and that of Georges, was very comical indeed but
worn
enough of
time
this.
Our concern
is
with the present

all
the funniest epoch, beyond
comparison, in
the history of the world. the
Some few
years back,
minds of nations, convulsed with the great

then taking place, were in a
to
political revolutions
mood by no means apt

sicality
be gratified by whim-
and merriment.
Furthermore, certain poets
of the lack-a-daisical school, such as Byron, Shelley,
Goethe, and others, Avriting
in comforniity
with the
prevailing taste of the day, threw a wet blanket on

the spirits of men,
which
all
but extinguished the
feeble embers of mirth, upon
which 'shocking events'

a scientific metaphor,
had exercised so pernicious an influence already

or,
to
change a vulgar
for
they placed such a pressure of sentimental atmosphere on the
common
stock of laughing gas, as to
10
convert
it
it
INTRODUCTION.
into a
It
mere
is
fluid,
and almost
to solidify
altogether.
now
exhibiting the amazing
amount
of expansive force,
it
which under favourable

exerting.
circumstances
is
capable of
Many
causes have combined to bring

state of things
about the happy

live.
under which we now
Amongst
the
first
these, the
exertions of individuals hold
rank
of
whom the
veteran Liston, the late lamented
Mr. John Reeve, the facetious Keeley, and the

inimitable
Buckstone, are deserving of our highest
commendation.
to
And more
epecially
is
praise due
the talented author of the
Pickwick Papers,
whose genius has convulsed the sides of thousands,

has revolutionized the republic of letters (making,
no doubt, a great
as
it
many
mirror,
sovereigns) and has become,
were,
which
will
reflect
to all
posterity the laughter-loving spirit of his age,
But
it
is
not (as
we have
recent
before remarked) in
the ludicrous
literature alone,
is
it
that the tendency to
shewn.
is
In
many
scientific speculations
strikingly
and abundantly obvious
some
of
those on geology
may be
quoted as examples.
The
come
offspring of the sciences
those pledges of
almost
all
aff'ection
which they present

into
to art,
of them,
the world with a caricature-like smirk upon
their faces.
Air-balloons and rail-roads have some;
thing funny about them

are,
to
and photogenic drawings
say the
least,
very curious.
The learned
INTRODUCTION.
professions are
is
all
11
tinged with drollery.
The law
confessedly ridiculous from beginning to end, and

is
what
to
very strange,
it
is
that no one should attempt
make
otherwise.
Medicine
is
comical
rather tragi-comical
its
or
and
the disparity of opinion
among
professors, the chaotic state of its principles,

its
the conduct of
students being
considered.
No
the
one can deny that the distribution of church property

doings
is
somewhat odd,
at
least of those
or
can
assert
that
who
are destined for the
clerical office, are
now and
reflect
then of rather a strance
character.
things,
tions
Political
meetings are very laughable
when we
the
upon the strong assevera-
of patriotism there
wisdom of
legislature
the gravest class,

cipal
made and believed. The is by no means of particularly when it offers munia

substitute
for
reforms
as
bread.
The
the
debates in a certain
House must be
if
of a very
humourous character,
proceedings there
we may judge from

Our
frequent " hear hear, and a laugh," by which the

are
interrupted.
risible
faculties are continually called into action at public
lectures of all
kinds
and indeed, no
be,
lecturer,
however learned he may

audience.
has
much chance
also
now-a-days of instructing, unless he can

his
amuse
Nor can
the
various
public and
even private buildings, which are daily springing
up around
us, like so
many mushrooms,
be contem-
12
INTRODUCTION'.
plated without considerable emotions of mirthfulness.

Tiie
new
style of ecclesiastical architecture, entitled

affords a
the Cockney-Gothic,
this
good illustration of
remark
but the
comic Temple of the Fine

is
Arts, in Trafalgar Square,
what Lord Bacon

of
its
would have
correctness.
called a " glaring instance"
The occurrences
lately passed on
;
of the
day bear
all
of them
the
stamp of facetiousness.
The
vote of
approbation,
policy,
is
a certain course of
a capital joke
the tricks that are con-
stantly played off upon
John Bull by the Russians,

others,
French,
Yankees, and
to
though somewhat
impertinent
the aforesaid John, must
seem very
diyerting to lookers on.
The
state in
;
of the
Drama
of our
may
also
be brought forward
proof
position.
Tragedies are at a discount

;
farces are at a
premium
into
lions,
nay goats and monkeys, are pressed
the service of
Momus.
Even
the
various
institutions for the
advancement of morals have not

taste.
escaped the influence of the prevailing
To
In
it
mention that respectable body of men, the Teetotallers, is sufficient of itself to excite
a smile.
find
short,
look
wherever you
will,
you
will
matter of the greatest difficulty to

tenance.
keep your coun-
The
find
is
it
truth
is,
that people are tired of crying,

to laugh.
and
much more agreeable

;
The sublime
out of fashion
the
ridiculous is in vogue.
INTRODUCTION.
turn-up nose
is
13
now a more
;
interesting object than
a turn-down collar
and
if it
should be urged that

indicative
the flowing locks of our of sentimentality
young men are

let it
by
their length,
be remem-
bered that they are in general quite unaccompanied
by a corresponding quality of
said that the schoolmaster
is
is
face.
:
It
has been
;
abroad
true
but he
;
walking arm and arm with the Merry- Andrew
and the members, presidents, and secretaries of

mechanics'
institutions,
and associations
in
for
the
advancement of everything, follow

Nothing can be taught that
nothing
is is
his
train.
not palatable,
is
and
now
palatable but what
funny.
That
boys should be instructed in the Latin language

will be denied
by few (although by some eccentric

has been done)
;
persons
this
that they
can be
expected
to all
to learn
Avhat they cannot laugh at will,
reflecting minds, especially
on perusing the
in
:
foregoing
considerations,
appear
the
highest
degree unreasonable.
as are
To conclude
let all
such
disposed
to stare
at the title of our work,
ponder attentively on what we have said above let them, in the language of the farce, " put this
and
that together,"
and they
will at once perceive
the beneficial
effect,
which holding up the Latin

likely to
for the
Grammar
to ridicule is
produce in the
satisfaction
minds of youth.
our senior readers.
So much
of
And
now,
no longer to detain
14
INTRODUCTION.
let
our juvenile friends,

pleasure, or
us proceed to business,
will
or
both
we
not stand upon cere-
mony with
respect to terms.
THE Sl'HOOLMASTER ABHOAD.
THE
COMIC LATIN GRAMMAR.
Of
Latin there are three kinds

;
Latin Proper, or
Thieves'
Latin.
good Latin
Dog
Latin
and
is
Latin Proper, or good Latin,
the language which
was spoken by the ancient Romans. Dog Latin is the Latin in which boys compose their first verses and themes, and which is occasionally
employed
at
the
Universities
of
Oxford
and
Cambridge, but much more

burgh,
frequently at EdinIt
Aberdeen,
and
Glasgow.
Latin
;
includes
to
Medical Latin, and

the unlearned,
Law
though these,
generally
;
appear Greek.
Illic
Mens
oculo
tuus ego
tuo
mind your eye ex there you go with

est
vadis
cum
;
your eye out
Quo-
modo
to
mater tua?
haustus ter die
how's your mother] Fiat a draught be made, capiendus

let
be taken three times a day;
Bona
et catalla
goods and chattels
are examples.
b2
16
THE COMIC LATIN GRAMMAR.

Thieves' Latin, more commonly
name
class
of slang, of
is
conveyancers,
of
much in use who disregard

and
tuum.
known by the among a certain

the
disit
tinctions
meum
in
Furthermore,
constitutes a great part of the familiar discourse of
most young men
modern times, particularly

It
lawyers' clerks and medical students.
bears a
very close
indeed,
to prig
it is
affinity
to
Law
Latin,
with which,
sometimes confounded.
Examples
a wipe
start
tion.
to
steal a handkerchief.
rum
curious occurrence.
plant
Flummoxed
heavy swell
undone.
an imposiA
tin,
Sold
deceived.
great dandy.
Quibus,
dibs.
A HEAVY SWELL.
mopuses,
victuals.
stumpy
money.
Grub, prog, tuck
stiff-'un a dead
body properly,
subject.
To be scraggedto
suffer the last penalty
of the law, &c.
17
All these kinds of Latin are to be taught in the
Comic Latin Grammar.
If
Toby, the learned pig, had been desired
to
it
say his alphabet in Latin, he would have done
TOBr, THE LEARNED PIG.
by taking away the

Indeed,
this is
W from
is
the English alphabet.

said to have actually
what he
letters,
done.
The Latin
therefore,
remind us of
the greatest age that a fashionable lady ever confesses she has attained to,
being between twenty

what Dutchmen,
namely,
and
thirty.
Six of these
letters are called

call
speaking English,
a,
e,
1,
fowls
vowels;
o,
u, y.
B 3
18
A
full
vowel
is
like
an .Êolian harp
itself.
it
makes a
and perfect sound of
consonant can-
not sound without a vowel, any
more than a horn
(except such an one as Baron Munchausen's) can
play a tune without a performer.
double
Consonants are divided into mutes, liquids and although they have nothing in letters;
the
r;
particular to do with funerals, hydrostatics, or
General post
the
office.
The
x,
liquids are,
z
;
1,
m,
n,
double
letters, j,
the other letters are
mutes.
"
Hye dum, dye
dutn, fiddle
dumb
c."
Stekne.
A
A
syllable is a distinct sound of one or
more
in the
letters
pronounced
in a breath, or, as
we say
classics, in a jiffey.
diphthong
is
the sound of two vowels in one

collectively
syllable.
Taken
they
resemble
closed
fist
i.
e.
a bunch oi Jives.
The diphthongs
first
are au, eu,
ei, se,
and
oe.
Of the two
is
of these,
au and eu, the sound

of the two vowels of
fact
is
intermediate between that

formed.
which each
This
may
perhaps be impressed upon the mind, on
the principles of artificial

to
a familiar beverage,
known by
ei,
memory, by a reference the name of

which
is
half-and-half.
rally
In like manner,
i,
genee.
pronounced
and
se
and
ce,
sounded like
19
may
to
be said
to exhibit
something like an analogy
a married couple.
female
+ Brown
male,
The human diphthong, Smith is called Brown only.
HUMAN DIPHTHONG.
The
reason
reason
reason, says the fool in
King Lear, why

seven
the
seven stars are no more than
because they are not

;
is
a pretty
is
eight.
This
a fool's
but
we
(like
cannot give a better

are no
many other commentators) one, why the Parts of Speech
more than eight

are as follow
:
because they are not
nine.
They
1.
Noun, Pronoun, Verb, Participle
declined.
like to
2.
Adverb, Preposition, Conjunction, Interjec-
tion
undeclined.
them
Most schoolboys would
decline
altogether.
20
OF A NOUN,
whether be a Christian a name of a a sur-name name, Whatever a noun. a a pancake,

A
noun
or
is
a name,
it
the
prince,
is
pig,
or
post.
is
Nouns
tives.
are divided
into substantives
and adjecand
A
word
noun substantive
for itself
is its
own
trumpeter,
speaks
without assistance from any other
brassica,
a cabbage
;
sartor,
tailor
;
medi-
cus, a physician
vetula,
an old woman
venenuin,
posion
are examples of substantives.

like
An adjective is
it
an
infant in leading strings

to
cannot go alone.
It
always requires
it
be joined
or
to a substantive,
of which
longa,
shows the nature

;
quality
as
lectio
a long lesson
magnus
;
aper, a great boar ; pinguis puer, a fat
boy
macer
puer, a lean boy.
In making love (as you will find
MAIER IICR.
PINUHS PIER.
21
one of these days) or in abusing a cab-man, your

success will depend in no small degree in your
choice of adjectives.
NUMBERS OP NOUNS.
Be
not alarmed,
boys, at the
it is
above heading.
true, that is to
There are numbers of nouns,

say, lots
;
or,
as
we say
in the schools, " a precious

;
sight" of nouns in the dictionary but we are not now going to enumerate, and make you learn them. The numbers of nouns here spoken of are two
only
the singular
and the
plural.
The
brick
;
singular
faba, a
speaks but of one

;
as
(or
later,
bean
;
tuba, a
trump
trumpet)
;
flamma, a blaze
nix, a crow.
a}thiops, a nigger (or negro)
cor-
The
bricks
;
plural speaks of
fabae,
more than one

tubse,
;
as
;
lateres,
beans
trumps
flammse,
blazes; aethiopes, niggers
cornices, crows.
Here
it
may
be remarked that the cynic philo-
sophers were very singular fellows.
Also that prize-poems are sometimes composed

in
very singular numbers.
22
CASES OP NOUNS.
Nouns have
oal_y
six cases in each number, (that
is,
six of one and
half a dozen of the other) but can
be put in one of them at a time.
They
are
thus ticketed
nominative,
genitive,
dative,
accu-
sative, vocative,
and ablative.
before the verb, as
the
The nominative case comes

the horse
does before
the cart,
" lieutenant
of
before the ancient,"

police
and the
superintendant
It
before
the
or
inspector.
answers
1
to
the
question,
who
what
as,
Who jaws
the
magister
jurgatur, the master jaws.
The
genitive case
to
is
known by
sign
of,
and
answers
the question,
?
whose, or whereof; as
Whose
breeches
Femoralia magistri
the breeches
or to or
for
of the master, or the master's breeches.
The dative case

and answers
to
is
known by
I
the signs to or for,
the question, to
whom,
what
as,
To whom do
hold out
I
Protendo manus magistro

the master.
hold out
my hands ? my hands to
In
this
it
place
we
are called upon to consider,

to
whether
be more agreeable
have Latin or the

School-
ferula at o\xx fingers' ends.
Observe that dative

masters are very often
means giving.
in
the dative case
but
23
their generosity is chiefly exercised in bestowing
what
is
termed monkey's allowance
that
is,
if
not
more kicks, more boxes on the ear, more spats, more canings, birchings, and impositions, than halfpence.
The accusative
case follows the verb, as a bailiff
follows a debtor, a bull-dog a butcher, or a round
of applause a supernatural
squall
at
the Italian
Opera.
It
answers
to
the question
?
Whom
or
What ?
The
ing to
;
as.
Whom
do you laugh at
(behind his
back) Derideo magistrum

vocative case
as,
is
is
laugh at the master.

calling, or
;
known by
master
speak-
magister
an exclamation
which
out,
frequently the consequence of shirking

false concords or quantities,
making
obstre-
perous conduct in school, &c.
The
tions,
ablative case
is
known by
certain preposi-
expressed
or
understood;
as
Deprensus
rostro
magistro
caught out by the master.
Coram
before the heak.

by,
The
prepositions, in, with, from,

after
and the word,
than,
the comparative
degree, are signs of the ablative case.
In angustia
native.
grin.
in a fix.
Cum
indigena
arbore
from
a tree.
rictu
with a by a
Ab
Adipe
lubricior
slicker than grease.
24
GENDERS AND ARTICLES.

The genders of nouns,
in
which are
three,
the
masculine, the feminine, and the neuter, are denoted
Latin by
articles.
We have
articles,
also,
in
English,
which
distinguish the masculine from the

;
feminine, but they are articles of dress

petticoats
such as
and breeches, mantillas and mackintoshes.
But as there are many things

culine
in Latin, called
mas-
and feminine, which are nevertheless not

male and female, the
articles attached to
25
them are
not parts of dress, but parts of speech.
We
initiate
will
now,
with our readers' permission,
them
into a
article hie, haec, hoc.
new mode of declining the And we take this opportunity

the
old
of protesting
against
and short-sighted
at a
system
of
teaching
boy only one thing
time, Avhich originated, no doubt, from the general
ignorance of everything but the dead languages
which prevailed
to
in the
monkish ages.
We propose
we
can
make
declensions, conjugations, &c., a vehicle
for
imparting something more than the mere dry
facts of the
immediate subject.
And
we
if
occasionally inculcate an original remark, a scientific

principle, or a moral aphorism,
shall, of course,
think ourselves sufficiently rewarded by the consciousness
et caetera, et caetera, et cajtera.
Masc.
hie.
Fern. haec.
singular
's
INTeut. hoc,
&c.
The nominative
hie, haec,
and hoc,
full
Which
The
to learn,
;
has cost school boys
many
knock
genitive
's
hujus, the dative
makes
to
huic,
(A
fact
Mr. Squeers never mentioned
Smike);
Then hunc, banc, and
hoc, the accusative makes.
The vocative caret no very The ablative case maketh hoc,
great shakes
hac,
and hoc,
cock
is
a fowl
but a fowl
c
's
not a cock.
26
The nominative plural is hi, hae, and hsec, The Roman young ladies were dressed a laGrecque The
genitive case horum, harum, and horum,
;
Silenus and Bacchus were fond of a jorum
The dative in all the three genders is his, At Actium his tip did Mark Antony miss The accusative 's hos, has, andhaec in all grammars, Herodotus told some American crammers The vocative here also caret 's no go, As Milo found rending an oak-tree, you know
:
And
his, like the
dative the ablative case
is.
The Furies had most disagreeable faces. Nouns declined with two articles, are called common. This word common requires explanation it is not used in the same sense as that in which
we
say,
that
quackery
is
common
in
medicine,
knavery in the law, and humbug everywhere

pigeons at Crockford's,
lame ducks
at the
Stock
Exchange, Jews
foreigners
in
at the ditto,
and Royal
ditto,
and
Leicester Square!
is
No
common
;
noun
is
one that
both masculine and feminine
in one sense of the
word therefore
it is
uncoinmon.
Parens, a parent, which

hie,
may be
declined both with
and
hsec, is, for
obvious reasons, a noun of this
class;
soldier,
and
so is fur, will
a thief;
likewise
miles,
which
appear strange
to those of
our
readers,
who do
not call to
;
mind the existence of
the ancient amazons
the dashing white sergeant

being the only female soldier
times.
"instance
27
in
known
modern
Nor have we more than one authenticated of a female sailor, if we except the
in the
heroine
commemorated
somewhat apocryphal
with
narrative
Billy Taylor.
Nouns
the
are called doubtful Avhen declined
the article hie or haec
whichever you
Duke
events
please, as
showman
said of the
of Wellington and
Napoleon
customer.
Bonaparte.
Anguis,
all
snake,
is
is
doubtful noun.
At
he
a doubtful
Epicene nouns are those which, though declined

with one article only,
represent both sexes, as hie
passer, a sparrow, hcEC aquila, an eagle,
c
cock and
28
hen.
eagle,
THE COMIC LATIN GRAMMAR,
sparrow, however, to say nothing of an

to
must appear a doubtful noun with regard

there
gender, to a cockney sportsman.
After
all,
is
no rule in the Latin language every thing he but a
about gender so comprehensive as that observed in
Hampshire, where they

tom-cat, and that she.
call
DECLENSION OF NOUNS SUBSTANTIVE.

There are
a pig
is
five declensions of substantives.
As
of
known by
case.
his tail, so are declensions
substantives distinguished
genitive
feelings
by the ending
of the
Our
fear
of outraging the comic
nf
humanity, prevents us from saying

as our love of learning
to do.
quite so
much about them
would otherwise induce us

Latin Grammar,
strongly
We
therefore
refer the student to that clever little book, the
Eton
to
recommending him
decline the following

exercise, after the
set
substantives,
by way
ae.
of an
manner
of the examples there
down.
First declension, Genitivo
Virga,
a rod.
Second,
Tergum, a back
curator,
i.
Puer, a boy.
Third,
is,
Stultus, a fool.
Vulpes, a fox.
Pro-
an attorney.
Cliens, a client.
Fourth,
us
ei.
here you may have, Risus, a laugh Fifth,

at.
Effigies,
an
effigy,
image, or Guy.

The substantive
in the plural.
face, facies,
29
facies,
makes faces,
Although we are precluded from going through

the whole of the declensions,
we
cannot refrain from
proposing " for the use of schools," a model upon
which
all
substantives
may
be declined in a mode
if
somewhat more agreeable,
not more instructive,
than that heretofore adopted.
Exempli Gratia.
Musa
muS(,
The Gods were at tea, Musae musam.

Eating raspberry jam,
Musa musa, Made by Cupid's mamma,

Musee musarw/n,
Thou " Diva Dearum."

Musis musa,?,
Said Jove
Musffi
to his lass,
musw.
beat this
?
Can ambrosia
DECLENSIONS OF NOUNS ADJECTIVE.

Some nouns
terminations
adjective
are declined with three
tails
as a pacha of three
c 3
would be,
if
30
he were
to
make
good
a proposal to an English heiress

tener, tender.
as bonus,
Sweet
epithets
how
forcibly they
remind us of young Love and a
leg of mutton.
Bonus, bona, bonum,
Thou
little
lambkin dumb,
Boni, bonse, boni.
For those sweet chops

Bono, bonae, bono^
I sigh.
Have
pity on
my
woe,
Bonum, bonam, bonum, Thou speak'st though thou

Bone, bona, bonum,
"
art
mum.
O come
and eat me, come,"

lays the low,
Bono, bonae, bono.
The butcher
Boni, bonae, bona.
Those chops are a picture,
ah
Bonorum, bonarum, bonorum,
To put
Bonis
lots of
Tomata sauce
o'er
'em
Don't, miss,
art sweeter than thy
Bonos, bonas, bona.
Thou
mamma,
Boni, bonse, bona.
And
fatter
than thy papa.

bliss
!
Bonis,
What
In like manner decline tener^ tenera, tenerum.

Unus, one
nullus,
;
31
solus,
alone
totus,
;
the
whole
none
alter, the other
uter,
whether of the
twomake
dative in
i.
the genitive case singular in ius and the
RIDDLES.
Q. In what case will a grain of barley joined to
an adjective stand
for the
name
of an animal
A. In the dative case of unus

TJni
uni-corn.
res.
2.
lib. ii.
nimirum
tibi recte
semper erunt
Hor. Sat.
106.
]
Q.
Why
is
the above verse like

it is
all
nature
A. Because
an wm'-verse.
another,
is
The word
above-named
alius,
declined like the

it
adjectives, except that
makes
aliud,
not Silium, in the
neuter singular.
The
difference of unus from alius, say the
London
commentators, like that of a humming-top from a

peg-top, consists of the 'um,
N.B. Tu
pressed by "
es unus
ahus,
is
not good Latin for
" You're another,"
a phrase
more elegantly ex-
Tu
quoque."
32

adjectives that remind
There are some
us of
lawyer's clerks, and, by courtesy, of linen-drapers'

apprentices.
tives
;
These may be termed articled adjechie, haec,
being declined with the articles
hoc, after the third declension of substantives

tristis,
as
sad, melior, better, felix, happy.
It is
not very easy to conceive any thing in which
sadness and comicality are united, except Tristis
Amator, a sad
lover.
TRISTIS AMATOR.
Melior
affords no
is
not better for comic purposes.

for
Felix
room
a happy joke.
Decline these three adjectives, and others of the
same
class,
according to the following rules

is or er,
i,
If the
nominative endeth in
why,
sir.
The
ablative singular endeth in
sir

The
first,
e,
33
neuter
fourth,
and
fifth
case,
their
make
E; or
i,
But the same
the plural in ia must be.
are the ablative's ends,
mark my song.
:
While
The
or to the nominative case doth belong

settle it thus
For the neuter aforesaid we

plural
is
or a
the singular us.
If than
is, er,
and
or, it
hath
many more
enders,
The nominative serves to express the three genders But the plural for ia hath icia and itia.
As
Felix, felicia
Dives,
divitia.
COMPARISONS OF ADJECTIVES.
Comparisons are odious
why
they are so disa-
Adjectives have three degrees of comparison.
This
is
perhaps the reason
greeable to learn.
The
first
degree of comparison
is
the positive,
which denotes the quality of a thing absolutely.

Thus, the Eton Latin
Grammar
is lepidus,
funny.
The second
is
the comparative,
which increases
to the first
or lessensthe quality,
formed by adding or
i.
case of the positive ending in
Thus
the Charter
House Grammar, is lepidor funnier, or more funny. The third is the superlative, which increases or
diminishes the signification to the greatest degree.
34
formed from the same case by adding thereto,

ssimus.
Thus the
Comic Latin
most funny.
Grammar
is
lipidissimus, funniest, or
is acutuS;,
Londoner
acutior,
sharp, or 'cute,
a Yorkshireman
more
or
'cute
sharper, or
more
sharp, 'cuter or
but a
with
Yankee
is
acutissimus
sharpest,
manner
most sharp,
'cutest or
most
'cute, or tarnation' cute.
Enumerate,
in
the
following,
substantives, the exceptions

in the
to this rule,
mentioned
Eton Grammar.
Melior, better.
suet pudding.
Bonus, good,
Optimus,
best.
A plain pudding. A
Malus, bad.
A plum pudding.
flogging.
Pejor, worse.
Pessimus, worst.
caning.
spatting.
&c. &c.
Adjectives ending in
errimus.
of verjuice
er,
form the superlative in

;
The
taste of vinegar is acer, sour
that
acrior,
more sour
the visage of
tee-totaller, acerrimus,
sourest, or
most sour.
Agilis, docilis, gracilis, facilis, humilis, similis,
change
is into llimus,
in the superlative degree.
Madlle. Taglioni. Jim Crow. Agillimus, most nimble. Mr. Wieland. Learned more Ourang-outang.
Agilis, nimble.
Agilior,
more nimble.
Docilis, docile.
Pig.
Docilior,
docile.
Docillimus, most docile.
Man
Friday.

Gracilis, slender.
35
A whipping
&c. &c.
post.
Gracilior,
more slender,
Gracillimus, most slender.
A fashionable A dustman's
in
waist.
leg.
If a
vowel comes before us
the nominative
is
case of an adjective, the comparison
made by
magis, more, and maxime, most,

Pius, pious
Dr. Cantvvell.
Magis
pius,
more
pious.
Maxime
pius,
most pious.
Mr. Maw-worm. Mr. Stiggins.

it
Sancho Panza called DonQuixote,Quixottissimus.

This was not good Latin, but
evinced a knowledge
on Sancho's part, of the nature of the superlative

degree.
OP A PRONOUN.
A
for
pronoun
is
a substitute, or (as
we
once heard
a lady of the Malaprop family say), a subierjuge
a noun.
fifteen
There are
Pronouns.
ille,
Ego,
I,
tu,
thou,
and
Billy,
Is, sui, ipse,
Got very
Iste, hie,
tipsy.
mens,
did not see us.
The governor
36

Tuus, suus, noster,
We knock'd
monger
for
down
a coster-
Vester, noster, vestras.
daring to pester us.
To
these
may
be added,
egomet,
myself
tute,
thou thyself, idem the same, qui, who or what, and

cujas, of
what country.
DECLENSION OP PRONOUNS.
Pronouns concern ourselves so much, that we
cannot altogether pass over them
or
;
though a hint
two
declension
We
the
mode of learning their we can here afford to give. are constrained now and then to leave out a good
Avith
regard
all
to the
is
that
deal of valuable matter, for the reason that induced

the Dublin
manager
to
omit the part of Hamlet in
play of that
name
the length of the perform:
ance.
Pronouns may be thus agreeably declined

Ego, mei, mihi.
Hoist the frog up sky-high.
Tu,
tui, tibi, fib
In Chancery they
Ille,
ilia,
ye.
illud.
Cows chew
the cud.

Is, ea,
id,
37
Always do
as you're bid.
Qui, quae, quod.
Or
else you'll taste the rod.
Every donkey can

distinctly
decline
is,
ea, id.
We
heard
repeat
one the other day on Hampstead Heath,
E o
a o
!
THE FIRST LESSON IN LATIN.
When
you decline quis quae quid, beware of any
temptation to indulge in dirty habits.

pig-tail instead of
Eschew
chewing
it.
Never have any
quid in your mouth, but a quid pro quo.
38
OF A VERB.
A
neck.
It
verb
is
the chief
word
let
in
every sentence, as
Suspendatur per collum,
him be hanged by the
expresses the action or being of a thing.

sapiens,
I
Ego
you
sum
thou art a
fool.
am a Non
wise man.
Tu
es stuhus,
hie amice, pernoctas,
don't lodge here,
Mr. Ferguson.
voices, like the gentleman
at the St.
Verbs have two
who
was
singing, a short time since,
James's
Theatre.
The
active ending in o
as amo,
I love. I
The passive ending

In these two words
in or
is
as amor,
Amo
!
am
loved.
contained the terrestrial
summum bonum
In
short, love beats everything
cock-fighting not excepted.
amor
How
happy every human

be
to
being,
from the peer to the
pot-boy, from the duchess to the dairy-maid, would
be able
to
say
so.
They would conjugate immediately.

however, certain
Except,
modern
political
economists of the
Malthusian school, Avho, albeit they are great advocates for

the
to
diffusion of learning,
are
violently
opposed
unlimited conjugations.
in o
Of verbs ending
some are actives
transitive.
verb
is called
transitive
when
the action passes

on
I
39
to the following
noun, as Seco baculuni
meum,
cutting,
cut
my
stick.
Numerous examples
which
of this
kind of
may
be called a comic section, are recorded
in history, both ancient
and modern.
Even Hector
cut his stick (with Achilles after him) at the siege
of Troy.
The Persians
cut
at his
cut their stick at Marathon.

at Pharsalia,
Pompey
Antony
stick
and so did
his
Actium.
Napoleon Bonaparte cut
stick at Waterloo.
Other verbs ending in o are named neuters and

intransitives,
verb
is
called
intransitive,
or
neuter,
when
the action does not pass on, or require

I
a following noun, as curro,

Pistol ran.
run.
Pistol cucurrit,
But
to
say, " Falstaff voluit currere
eum
per,""
Falstaff wished to run
him through,
active,
would be making a neuter verb, a verb
and would
or
therefore be Latin of the canine species,

so would
Dog- Latin;
cucurrit
Mens homo Gulielmus caput suum plenum sed contra te homo die
head
full
pax,
My man William ran his

This,
it
but against
the mantel-piece.
after Cicero.
is
obvious, will not do
Verbs
cut
transitive ending in o
or, as Secor, I
become passive by
Csesar
changing o into
am cut.
was
by
his friend Brutus in the capitol. " This," as
Antony very judiciously
oliserved on the hustings,

all,"
" was the most unkindestcwôf

D 2
much worse,
40
indeed,

than any of the similar operations which
are daily performed in Regent Street.
BRUTUS 4ND C^SAR.
Verbs neuter and

passive.
intransitive are never
made
We
may
say, Crepo,
I
crack, but
we
cannot say, Crepor,
am
cracked.
The
says, to
ancient heroes appear, from
what Homer
have got
into a
way
of cracking
away most
tremendously when they were going to engage in

single combat.
Orestes
was
certainly cracked.
Some
fication
verbs ending in or have an active signiI
as Loquor,
speak.

Q,
41
1
Why
these
are such verbs like witnesses on oath
A. Because they are called " Deponents."
Of
boast.
some few are
neuters,
as Glorior,
Caesar boasted that he came,
saw, and overnot,
came.
Bald-headed people (like Caesar) do
in general,
make
conquests so easily.
in or,
Neuter Verbs ending
and verbs deponent,

;
are declined like verbs passive
but with gerunds

thus presenting a
and supines
like
verbs active
curious combination of activity and supineness.
There are some verbs which are called verbs

personal.
verb personal resembles a mixed

it
group of old maids and young maids, because

has different persons, as
irrides,
Ego
irrideo,
I quiz.
Tu
thou quizzest.
is
verb impersonal
like a collection of
;
tomb-
stone angels, or small children
it
has not different

it
persons, as taedat,
It irketh to learn
it
it
irketh, oportet,
behoveth.
Greek and
Latin, nevertheless
behoveth
to
do
so.
OF MOODS.
Moods
in verbs
are like
moods
in
man
they
have each of them a peculiar expressio7i.

D
Here,
42
however, the resemblance stops.

moods,
verbs
Man
has
have but
five.
For instance,
many we
observe in
(or
men
the merry mood, the doleful mood,
dumps), the shy, timid, or sheepish mood, the

or bumptious
bold,
mood, the placid mood, the
angry mood, whereto
may
be added the vindictive
mood, and the sulky mood; the sober mood, as

contradistinguished
the
from
;
both the
as
serious
and
drunken
in
mood
or
it
blended with the
latter,
which case
may
be called the soberthe
drunk
bling
moodthe
mood
;
contented mood,
grum-
the sympathetic mood,
the sarcastic
mood, the
idle
mood, the working mood, the com-
municative mood, the secretive mood, and the moods

of all the phrenological organs
;
besides the moni-
tory or mentorial
mood, and the mendacious, or

or ro-
lying mood, with the imaginative, poetical,
mantic mood, the compassionate, or melting mood,
and many other moods too tedious
to
mention.
flirting
We
the
must not however omit the

or talkative mood,
mood,
the teazing or tantalizing mood, the giggling mood,
magging
and the scandalizing
mood, which are peculiarly observable inthefair sex.
The moods of verbs are the following 1. The indicative mood, which either affirms a
:
fact
or asks a question, as tu
?
Ego amo,
do love.
Amas
Dost thou love

The long and
in these
43
short of all courtships are contained
two examples.
A LONG COlRTSMiP.
2.
The imperative mood, which commandeth,
or
entreateth.
This two-fold character of the impeexemplified in schools, the

part of the master, and the
rative mood is often command being on the
entreaty on that of the boy
as
thus,
!
Veni hue
Come
rative
hither
Parce mihi
is
Spare me
The impelet
mood
also
known by
the sign
as
in
the
well-known verse
"
in the song
Dulce
Domum
for the
Eja
nunc eamus."
"
Hurrah
vacation.
now let us be off' meaning N.B. This mood is one much

!
in the
44
mouth of beadles, boatswains, bashaws, majors,

magistrates,
jeants,
nitors,
slave
drivers,
superintendents,
ser-
and
jacks-in-office of all descriptionsmo-
especially,
and prefects of public schools,

it
are very fond of using
on
all
occasions.
THE IMPERATIVE MOOD.
3.
The
signs
potential
mood
it
signifies
power
are,
or duty.
The
by which
is
known
may, can,
might, would, could, should, or ought
as,
Amem,
may
4.
love (when
(if I
have loved
Heave school). Amivissem,! should had not known better,) and the like.
differs
The subjunctive
from the potential only
in being
indefinite
always governed by some conjunction or

word, and in being subjoined
it
to
some
other verb going before
in the
I
same sentence
as
Cochleare eram
cum amarem,
was a spoon when

I
45
I
loved
Nescio
qualis sim hoc ipso tempore,

sort of a
don't time.
know what
person
am
at this very
The propriety of
toric,
the above expression " cochle-
are," will be explained in a
Comic System of Rhea gentleman's cab,
which perhaps
ma)""
appear hereafter.
5.
The
it
infinitive
mood
is like
because
has no number.
not
We have
ther to ness," which
cessful
made up our minds

it
exactly,
whemen-
compare
to the " picture of nobody"
tioned in the Tempest, or to the
" picture of ugli-
young
It
it
ladies generally call their suc-
rivals.
may
be like one, or the other,
or both, because
has no person.
it
;
Neither has
indeed, has
it
it
a nominative case before
nor,
any more business with one than a

the sign
toad has with a side pocket.

It is
commonly known by
to.
As,
for
;
example
Nubere,
Amare,
to
to love
;
Desipere, to be a
fool
marry
Poenitere, to repent.
OF GERUNDS AND SUPINES.

Ever anxious
youthful minds,
sible of the
to
encourage the
expansion of
by
as general a cultivation as pos-
various faculties,
we beg
to
invite
attention to the following combination of
Grammar,
Poetry, and Music.
46

if all
^tV. Believe me
those endearing young charms. Moore.
The gerunds of verbs end
in di, do,
and dum,
;
But the supines of verbs are but two For instance, the active, which endeth in um,
And
the passive
which endeth
in u.
Amandi, of
loving, kind reader,
beware
Amando,
in loving, be brief
to love, if
Amandum,
you
'r
doom'd, have a care,

your
grief.
In the goblet to drown
all
Amatum, Amatu,
Should
it
to love
and be loved,
be your
felicitous (?) lot.
May
the fuel so needful be never
removed
Which
serves to keep boiling the pot.
OF TENSES.
In verbs there are five tenses, or times, express-
ing an action, or affirmation.

1.
The
present tense, or time.

It
There
is
no time
(or tense) like the present.
expresses an action
Act.
I love, or I
now
taking place.
Examples
loving.
Amo,
am
loving.
Pass.
am am made
some-
drunk, or
2.
am
drunk.
Inebrior, I
am
drunk.
The
preterimperfect
tense
denotes
thing, or a state of things, partly, but not entirely

past
47
Examp.
I
did love or
I
bam,
ago.
3.
was
loving.
I
was loving. Amawas made drunk an hour

expresses
a thing
Inebriabar,
was made drunk.
The
loved.
or
preterperfect tense
lately done, but
or
now ended. -Examp. I have loved, Amavi, I loved. I have been made
Inebriatus sum,
I
drunk,
have been drunk.
have been drunk.

4.
The
preterpluperfect tense refers to a thing
done at some time past, but now ended.
Examp.
I
Amaveram,
been drunk.
5.
had loved.
Inebriatus eram,
had
The
future tense relates to a thing to be done
hereafter, as,
Amabo,
get drunk
I shall or Avill
love
Inebri-
abor,
I shall
say to-morrow.
OF NUMBERS AND PERSONS.

Verbs have two numbers. No.
2, Plural.
1,
Singular, No.
In most matters
tion to
it is
usual to pay exclusive atten-
number
it is
one.
In learning the verbs, how-
ever,
necessary to regard equally number two.
The
persons of verbs are generally considered
very disagreeable.
Verbs have three persons

for
in
each number.
Thus,
instance,
at a
dancing
academy
48
Sing.
Ego salto, Tu saltas,

Ille
dance,
dancest.
Thou
saltat,
He
Ye
danceth.
Plur.
Nos Vos
Illi
saltamus,
saltatis,
We dance,
dance,
saltant,
They dance.
princi-
ples
At an academy on Free-knowledge-ical or a Comic Academy.
Ego Tu
lUe
rideo,
rides,
ridet,
laugh,
laughest,
Thou
He
Ye
laugheth.
laugh,
Nos ridemus, Vos ridetis,

Illi
"We
laugh,
rident,
too,
is
They
very
laugh.
at other acade-
Laughter,
common
mies, but generally occurs on the
wrong
side of the
mouth.
The
to
right sort of laughter (which
may
be
is
presumed
be on the right side of the mouth),
most frequent about the time of the holidays.

does the song say
1
What
" Ridet annus, prata rident
Nosque rideamus."
" The year laughs, the meadows laugh, pose
supsee
we have a
laugh as well."
all
Note
That
nouns are of the third person
except Ego, Nos, Tu,
and Vos.
Hence we
49
of donke} s
to
call
how absurdly
the picture "
the
man who drew a couple

Three"
to
Ille, he,
acted in endeavouring to prevail
upon us
We
may, perhaps,
tlie
have been qualified
make
a third person in
group, and have " written himself
down an
ass"
with some correctness.
Ego,
I,
and Nos, we,

that animal,
have certainly nothing

and
it is
in
common with
to
be hoped that neither Tu, thou, nor Vos,
ye, can be said to partake of his nature.
Note
also.
That
all
nouns of the vocative case
are of the second person.

say,
So
;
that if
or
we
should
asine,
thou donkey
asini,
ye
on
donkeys,
our side.
we
should have
grammar
at
least
Be
also.
it
your care
to
prevent us from having justice
Of the Verb Esse, to

Before other verbs are declined,
to learn
be.
is
It
necessary
before
to
the verb Esse,
to
be.
it is
And
teach the verb Esse, to be,
necessary
we make
a few remarks on verbs in general.

In the
are
first
place
we have
to
observe, that they
rather difficult; and in the next, that if

to consider
any
in
one expects that we are going

detail,
them
he
is
very
much
mistaken.
But our skipping a very considerable portion of

the verbs,
is
no reason
why
E
boys should do the
50
same.
Were we
all to
follow the
to
examples of our
their
teachers,
instead of
attending
precepts,
where would be the world by

Whirling away, no doubt,
able
society of
this time ?
far
from the respect-
the
neighbouring planets,
left,
and
blundering about right and

skelter
pell-mell, helteritself,
among
it
the
fixed
stars
" and
all
Avhich
inherit" in that glorious state of confusion
so admirably described
by
the poet
Ovid
" Quern dixere Chaos,"
which men have called Shaos.

be
little
It
would indeed
better than a broken down Sha}/-hovse.
But " revenons a nos moutons," that is, let us We recommend the most get back to our verbs.
attentive
forth in
and
diligent study of all of
them as
shall
set
the Eton Grammar, assisted by that kind of ideas, of which
of association
we
now
proceed
to
give a few specimens.
Sum,
that
is
es, fui, esse, futurus, to be,
or not
to
be
the question.
1.
Rule
To each person
of a verb,
singular and
plural, join a noun,

talent.
according to your taste or comic

in the inventive
Should you be deficient

apply
for assistance to
faculty,
one of the senior
boys, which, in consideration of your fagging for
him, he will readily give you.

boy, apply to the master.
If yourself a senior

Examples.
51
Indicative Mood.
Present Tense.
Sing.
Am,
a man, a a
fool,
Sum,
Es,
Est,
am,
art,
Vir,
Stultus,
Thou
He
Plu.
is,
Latro,
thief.
Sumus,
Estis,
We are,
Ye
are,
Patricii,
gentlemen.
snobs,
Plebeii,
Sunt,
They
are, Errones,
vagabonds.
but that
We would
we
proceed in this
way with Sum,
are afraid of being tire-swm.
Verbs Regular. Amo. First Conjugation.

Sing.
Amo, Amas,
Amat,
I love,
Puellam, a
lass,
Thou
lovest,
Fartum,
a pudding,
pork.
He
Plu.
loveth,
Carnem porcinam,
Amamus,
Amatis,
We love,
Ye
love,
Doctrinam,
learning.
Leporem,
comicality,
poetry.
Amant,
They
love, Poesin,
The consideration of which Rule 2. In repeating

verbs,
three things leads us to
the different
tenses
of
be careful to be provided with a short
Eng-
e2
52
lish verse,

contrived so as to rhyme with the third
person
singular,
and another
In this
to
rhyme with
the
of
third person plural.
way your powers
composition as well as of memory will be profitably

exercised.
Example.
Second Conjugation.
Sing.
Moneo.
Moneo, mones, monet.

Reid
&
Co.'s
heavy wet.
Plu.
Monemus, monetis, monent.

Beats that from the firmament.
Third Conjugation.
Sing.
Rego.
Rego,
regis, regit,
for office unfit,
A statesman
Plu.
Regimus,
Is
regitis, reguni,
much
like a
bear in a punt.
to give the
Hule
lish
3.
Should you be desired
Engfol-
of each person in the tense which
you are
repeating,
you may (we mean a class of you),
low a plan adopted with great success and striking

eflfect
in that
kind of dramatic representation enti-
tled
"
have
toes,
to
Grand Opera," that of singing what you sar/. Hold up your head, turn out your
your voices, and begin.
clear
A-hem
iO
ROUGH THE

Fourth Conjugation.
Trio.
53
Audio.
Sing.
Audio,
hear the Tartar drum
Audis, Thou hearest the Tartar drum

Audit,
!
He hears the Tartar drum the

Tartar drum
!
the Tartar
drum
Chorus.
He He
hears
hears
the Tar
- tar
He
Plu.
h--e---a--rs
Audimus,
drum
We hear the Tartar drum, &c.
Verbs Irregular
Are regular
bores.
are
The above Rules
equally
applicable to them, and also to the
Defective Verbs
Concerning which
almost
fect,
all
it
may
be asserted, that though
of them have tenses
more
or less imper-
there are some which have not a single Im-
perfect Tense.
Impersonal Verbs.
Such as
&c.,
delectat,
to
it
delighteth
decet,
it
becometh,
answer
it
such English verbs as take the
Avord
before them.
When we
E 3
consider that
it is
54
a term of endearment used in speaking to babies, as " it's a pretty dear," we cannot help thinking
PRETTY DEAR.
that Verbs Impersonal ought
to
be pet verbs. Such

the fact.
however,
is not,
as far as
we know,
OP A PARTICIPLE.
A
is
participle is a hybrid part of speech
a kind
It
of mongrel-cross,
between a noun and a verb.

;
two parts verbs, and four parts noun

composition
wherefore
its
may
be likened unto the milk sold

is
in
and about London, which
usually watered in
the proportion of four to two.
The
properties of
the
noun belonging
;
to
it,
are,
number, gender, case,
and declension
nification.
those of the verb, tense,
and
sig-
55
As
a horse hath four legs, so hath a verb four
participles.
Air.
Bonnets of Blue.
There
's
one of the present,

's
and then,
;
There
one of the future in rus
Of the
tense preterperfect a third,

fourth of the future in dus.
and
again,
A
as
Participles are
declined like nouns
adjective,
how can we ask our fair decline a-mans (amans) loving. readers to Now here we feel called upon to say
no
!
but
(blue)
few
words on the difference between a man's loving and a woman's loving. It has often been a question,
whether do
the matter
men
or
women
love most dearly
To us
doubt.
in
for
does not appear to admit of a
We
defy any of our male readers to be

old
love
(when they are
and
silly
enough)
six months without finding themselves most
grievously out of pocket.
We
have a friend who

month,
was
and
in that unfortunate condition for about a

it
cost
him
at least seven and sixpence a
week
maid servant, and that without once being enabled to exchange a word with the object At last he began to think that of his affections.
in fees to the
he was paying rather too dear

he gave
long,
it
for his whistle
so
so
up.
What
girl
would have held on

a return
and
laid out so
much money without
5Q

?
not of soft affection, but of hard cash
Women,
indeed, instead of loving dearly, love, according to
our
own
experience, particularly cheaply. Think of

their admirers " shop-
what they save, by taking

ping" with them,
like,
in
ribands, bracelets,
and the
to
say nothing of coach-hire, pastry-cooks,
and the price of admission, when they go with them

to the play.
And we
who
it
should like to hear of the
young lady
in these
less
days would dispose of her

if
hand
at
any thing
than a good round sum
she could help
no, no.
To
love dearly
is
the
precious prerogative of the lords of the

alone.
creation
But we are
forgetting our participles.
The
participle of the present tense ends in a7is,
or ens; as Flagellans,
whipping; Laedens, hurting.

signifies
That of the future

or
in rus,
a likelihood,
design
of doing something, as Flagellaturus,

;
about to whip
Lsesurus,
about to hurt.
That of the preterperfect tense has generally a passive signification, and ends in zts, as Flagella
-
tus,
whipped
Lsesus, hurt.
That
of the future in dus has also a passive sig-
nification,
as Flagellandus, to be whipped
hse-
dendus, to be hurt.
Note
1.
All participles are declined like nouns
adjective.
We
recommend
the above participles to
be declined like winking.

2.
57
by-
There are three things that are not hurt
whipping
top,
a syllabub, and a cream.
OF AN ADVERB.
Convex and concave
used
to increase or
spectacles are contrivances
diminish the magnitude of objects.

to increase or
Adverbs are parts of speech used

diminish the signification of words.
Spectacles are joined to the bridge of the nose.
Adverbs are
verbs.
joined
;
to
nouns adjective,
;
and
&c.
Bene, well
multum, much
male,
ill,
are adverbs.
Caesar
Ca?sar
mulLum conturbavit indigenas much astonished the natives.
fyESVK AST0NI3III>0 THE NATIVES.
58
OF A CONJUNCTION.
A
To
it
conjunction
;
is
a part of speech that joineth

it
together
things
;
wherefore
may gum
be hkened unto
many
for instance
glue, to paste, to
arabic, to mortar, (for

like bricks),
joins words
and sentences together
to
Roman
to
cement, (Laiin conjunctions more espe-
cially),
white of egg, to isinglass, to putty,
to
adhesive plaster, to matrimony.
Conjunctions are thus used.
Ova
ei
lardum,
eggs
and bacon.
Dimidium
et
dimidium^we, half-and-half.
love and madness.
Amor
dementia,
IIAUFANU-HALF.
59
OF A PREPOSITION.
Preposition
is
a part of speech commonly set
before another word.
Words, however, do not
eat
each other, though

words.
men have been known

is
to eat
Ab,
ad, ante, &c. prepositions.
Sometimes a preposition
joined in composition
with another word, as jorostratus, knocked down

floored.
Tullius ab aquario ^rostratus est
Tully was knocked down by a waterman.
OF AN INTERJECTION.
An
interjection is a
word expressing a sudden
emotion
or
!
feeling,
as
!
Hei
Oh
dear
!
Heu
Lack-a-day
Hem
Bravo
find
!
Brute,
Titus.
Hollo
Brutus.
Euge
Tite,
We
we
here
ourselves approaching the
de-
lightful subject
of the three Concords, with which

short work,
first,
shall
make
for fear of further
Accidence, and, secondly, because
we
are no fonder
than boys are of repetitions, which, were

follow
we
to
the
Eton Grammar
in
the Concords,
we
be
should be obliged to
make
in the
Syntax.
However, there are

mentioned.
just one or
two points
to
60
Rule.
THE COMIC LATIN GRAMMAK.

(Text-hand
copy-books.)
"
Ask
no
questions."
Exception.
When
1
you want
to find the
to
find
where the
concord should be, ask the following
Who
or
what
or
nominative case
to
the verb.
Whom
tive after
what 1 with
the verb, for the accusa-
it.
Who
Who
or
what what
with the adjective,
for the
sub-
stantive to the adjective.

1
or
with the verb,
for the
antecedent
to the relative.
But remember,
that the use of the interrogatives
who
is
and what
however
justifiable in
grammar,
for
very impertinent in conversation.
What,
to say.
ill
example, can be more ill-bred than

are
Who
you
Indeed, most questions are
mannered.
We
do not speak of such expressions

?
as.
Has your
used only
mother sold her mangle
and the
like,
by persons
who have
to
never asked
to
]
themselves
where they expect

Johnson, "
go
but of
said
all
unnecessary
great
demands whatever,
it
" Sir,"
the
Dr
tail
is
uncivil to be continually asking.

tail
Why
long."
is
a dog's
short, or
why
is
a cow's
61
OF THE GENDERS OF NOUNS,

Coiiimonlj'
known by
the
name
of
" Propria Qiice Maribus.'"
As
the
the " Propria Quae Maribus" is no joke, and
"
As
in Prsesenti" is too
much
of a joke,
we
must do with them as we did with the verbs.

Singing a song
is
always esteemed a valid substi;
tute for telling a story
and the indulgence which

to
we would have extended
us in this respect,
is
that universally granted to civilized society.
Let the " Propria Quae Maribus" be turned

a series of exercises, thus, or in like
Air.-
into
manner
fifteen.''
"Here
's
to the
maiden of bashful
All names of the male kind you masculine
call,
Ut
sunt (for example), Divorum,

all,
Mars, Bacchus, Apollo, the deities
And
Cato, Virgilius, virorum.

's
Latin
a bore, and bothers

I
me
sore,
Oh how
wish that
my
lesson
was
o'er.
Fluviorum, ut Tibris, Orontes likewise,
Fine rivers in ocean that
lost are,
s
;
And Mensium
October an instance suppli
Ventorum, ut Libs, Notus, Auster.

Latin
's
a bore, &c.
We
do not pretend that the mode of study here

is
recommended,
perfectly original.
The genuine
62
Propria Quae Maribus, and
As
in Preesenti, like the
writings of the most remote antiquity, consist of certain useful truths recorded in
It
harmonious numbers.
has
been
a question
among commentators,
origi-
whether these interesting compositions were

nally intended to be said or sung.
Analogy (we
which
mean
that derived from the
works of Homer and
Virgil)
would
incline us to the latter opinion,

to
however does not appear

entertained
in
have been generally
the schools.
in the
We
;
shall
give
one
it
more specimen
above style
and we beg
may
wish
be remembered, that in so doing,

to detract in
we have no
all
any way from the merit of the
illustrious poet in the

is,
Eton Grammar
we
think
that he
might have introduced a
little
more
it.
comicality into his work, while he
was about
OF THE PRETERPERFECT TENSE, VERBS.

Otherwise the
Sec.
OF
"As
in Prcesenti.''''
As Oh
in Prsesenti
!
Preterperfect
is
avi.
send
me
well done, lean, and lots of grav\-,
Save
lavo, lavi, nexo, nexui.
Ah
me
how sweet
and
cream with apple-pie,
Juvi from juvo, secui from seco,
Could
n't I lie
tipple,
more Gra?co
63
From neco, necui, and mico, word Which micui makes, Oh roast goose,
!
lovely bird
!
Plico which plicui gives.
Delightful grub
And
frico, fricas, fricui, to
rub
So domo,
tono, domui, tonui
make,
to the stake,
too.
And
I
sono, sonui.
mean
the hee^-siake
to
Lead me crepo, crepui

makesforbidding
Which means
Then
Cubo,
to lie
crack (as roasted chestnuts do,)

sound,
veto, vetui
along (these verbs confound
Ye gods) makes cubui, What viler object than

Sto
to
do gives rightly dedi

a coat that
's
seedy
form
steti
has a predilection
Well
let it if it likes, I've
no objection.
&c. &c. &c.
SYNTAXIS.
or the Construction of
Grammar.
the
Q.
What
part of the
grammar resembles
?
indulgences sold in the middle ages
A.
Sin-iSLX.
The first Concord; The Nominative case and the Verb.
Where
there
is
much personality,
there
is
gene-
rally little concord.
f2
64
However, a verb personal agrees with its nominative case in number and person, as Sera nunquam est ad bonos mores via. The way to good manners
is
never too
late.
Mind
that, brother
Jonathan.
AMEBICAN GENTLEMEN.
Nofe
The above maxim
is
especially worthy of
;
the attention of neophytes in law and medicine the gods in the gallery, and of Members
of
oHhe House.
The nominative
as
case of pronouns
is
rarely expres-
sed, except for the sake of distinction or emphasis,
Tu es exquisitus, tu es, You 're a nice man, you
are.
^1
(L-
E W
.;
';
L-
1'-
...
V M
II
C SSE
WIOLI.JTOS
MORES NOW SIN!

Sometimes a sentence
the verb, as
is
Q5
the nominative case to
Ingeniias pugni didicisse fideliter artes,
Mollitos mores non sinit esse
viri.
The faithful study of the fistic art From mawkish softness guards a Briton's
heart.
to
Who
can doubt
it
But, besides,
In the
we have much
first
say in praise of boxing.

classical accomplishment.
place,
it is
To say nothing
of the
Olympic and Isthmian Games, which are of themselves suflScient proof of the elegant and fanciful
tastes of the ancients;
fact, that the
we need
only allude to the
Corinthians are universally celebrated
for their proficiency in this science.
Then, of
its
eminently social tendency, there can be no doubt.
What
can be more conducive
to
good fellowship,
and conviviality than the frequent tapping of claret, attendant both on its study and practice ? Nor can
its
beneficial influence
on the
fine arts
be called in
is to
question, seeing that
its
immediate object
teach
is
us the use of our hands.
And
sex,
(which perhaps
all),
it is
the most pursuasive argument of

larly pleasing
to the
fair
particu-
who
besides their
well
known admiration
of bravery, are, to a
woman,
devotedly attached
to the ring.
Sometimes an adverb with a genitive case stands

in the place of the nominative, as
F 3
66

Partim astutorum mordebantur,
Part of the knowing ones were
bit.
is
We
must contend that the above
a racy
observation.
Exceptions to the Rule.

Verbs
of the infinitive that there is
;
mood
but
it
hold.
Re-
member
to the
scarcely any rule without
an exception
and
this
axiom particularly applies

to
Sjmtax.
We
used
wish
did not
so
beto
cause then
learn
we
should not have had
much
to
resume however
infinitive
Verbs of the
fore
mood
or
often
have
set be-
them an accusative case instead of a nominaut,
tive; the conjunction quod,

as,
being
left
out
Annam
reginam aiunt occubuisse

that
They say
Queen Anne's
dead,
verb placed between two nominative cases of
different
numbers,
it
is
not like a donkey between two

of one or the other,
stacks of hay,
makes choice
it,
and agrees with
as
est,
Amygdalae amarae venenum

Bitter almonds is poison.
We
have written the English beneath the Latin.

it
Perhaps
may be imagined
us.
that
we
think good
English beneath
67
A singular noun
to
of multitude
is
sometimes joined
a plural verb
as
Pars puerorum philosophum secuti sunt,

Part of the boys followed the philosopher.
And
so they
would now, particularly
if
they saw
one in costume.
Verbs impersonal have no nominative case before

them, as
Taedet
Pertsesum est Syntaxeos,

Syntax.
me Grammatices, lam weary of Grammar. I am quite sick of
Mirificum visum est Socratem in gyrum saltan-
tem videre,
68
It

seemed wonderful
to
behold Socrates jumping
Jim Crow.
the comic latin grammar.
69
Second concord. substantive and the adjective. The

Adjectives, participles, and pronouns agree with
the substantive in gender, number, and case, as
Vir exiguo conventui, sobrioque idoneus
nice
man
for
a small tea-party.
TEA SPOON.
The Spartans, probably, were men

their aversion to
of this kind
drunkenness being well known.

is
Observe how close the concord

stantive and
adjective.
;
between sub-
The
little
ties
of wedlock are
nothing to
there
is
it
for,
besides that in that

discord,
happy
state
very often not a
it is ([uite
\\\
impossible that
man and
wife should ever agree
gender.
70

Sometimes a sentence supplies the place of a
substantive
the
adjective
being placed in the
neuter gender, as
Audito reginam leones coenantes visisse

It
being heard that
Her Majesty had gone
to see
the lions at supper.
Third Concord. The relative and the antecedent.

The
relative
;
and antecedent
hit it off
very
Avell
together
they agree one with the other in gender,
number, and person, as
Qui plenos haurit cyathos, madidusque

Ille
quiescit,
bonam
degit vitam, moriturque facetus.
"
He who
drinks plenty, and goes to bed mellow.

to do,
Lives as he ought
and dies a
jolly fellow."

Horace
Avas the fellow for
this
71
kind of thing.
Cato must have been a regular Avet blanket.
Sometimes a sentence
cedent, as
is
placed for an ante-
Heliogabalus,
spiritu contento,
viginti
quatuor
ostrearum demersit in alvum, quod Dandoni etiam

longe antecellit.
Heliogabalus,
at
one breath,
swallowed two
dozen of oysters, which beats even Dando out and

out.
HELIOGABALUS.
Many
of the ancients could swallow a good deal.
relative placed
between two substantives of
different genders
and numbers, sometimes agrees
with the
latter, as
Pueri tuentur ilium librum quae Latina

matices et Comica dicitur.
GramComic
Boys regard
Latin
that book
which
is
called the
Grammar.
72

Sometimes a
relative
agrees with the primitive,
which
is
understood in the possessive, as
Mirabantur impudentiam suam qui ad reginam

literas misit.
They wondered
letter to the
at his
impudence, who wrote a
queen.
If a
nominative case be interposed between the
relative
and the verb, the relative

or
is
governed by
is
the verb,
by some other word
whicfi
placed
in the sentence with the verb, as
Luciferi quos Prometheus surripuit,
ad Jovem
cujus
numen contempsit, pertinebant. The Lucifers which Prometheus

to Jupiter,
shirked,
be-
longed
whose authority he despised.
In fact,
liyhining.
Prometheus
made
light
of Jupiter's
We
only
now take leave how pleasant it is
of the Concords, observing

to see relatives agree.
IT
'S
PLEASANT TO SEE RELATIVES AGBEE.
: :
73
Our next
subject
is
the
Construction of Nouns Substantive.
Which
or
is
not quite so amusing as the construc-
tion of small boats,
paper
kites, pinwheels, crackers,
any other mode of displaying the faculty of
" constructiveness"
though
in one sense the con-
struction of nouns substantive, is
not unlike
the
construction oi puzzles.
When
two substantives of a
different
is
signifi-
cation meet together, the latter

tive case, as
put in the geni-
Ulysses lumen Cyclopis extinxit
Ulysses doused the glim of the Cyclops.

This genitive case
dative, as
is
sometimes changed
into a
Urbi pater
est,
urbique maritus.
city,
Gram. Eton.
whoever he
He
is
the .father of the
and the husband of
the city.
He
was.
must have been a pretty
fellow,
An
adjective of the neuter gender, put without a
substantive, sometimes requires a genitive case, as
Paululum honestatis
sartori sufhcit
A very little honesty is enough for a tailor. A genitive case is sometimes placed alone
preceding
substantive
the
being
understood by the
figure ellipsis, as
74

:
Ubi ad magistri veneris, cave verbum de porco When you are come to the master's (house), not
a word about the pig.
The word
to signify
pig
is
a very general term, and
is
used
not only the
animal so called, and such
of the
human
race as resemble him in habits, ap;
pearance, or feelings
of
little
but also to denote a variety

it is
things,
which
sometimes necessary
to
keep
secret.
pedagogue now
and then discovers a
pig-tail appended to his coat collar
this, or
rather
little
the
way
in
which
it
got there,
is
one of the
pigs in question.
is
Robbing the larder
or the garden
another
so is insinuating
horse-hairs into the
cane, or putting cobbler's
wax
on the seat of learning
we mean
the master's stool.

is
sort of
pig
(or
rather a rat)
sometimes smelt by the master on

the dormitories,
taking his nightly walk though
when roast fowl, mince

places of repose.
pies,
bread and cheese, shrub,
punch, &c. have been slyly smuggled into those Shirking
down town
is
always a
of dis-
pig, and the consequences thereof,
in case
covery, a great bore.
Considering that a secret

that betraying one
is
a pig,
it is
singular
should be called letting the cat
out of the bag.
Two
substantives respecting the
same thing
are
put in the
same
case, as

Telemachum, juvenem bonae
existimavit.
indolis,
75
Calypso
Calypso thought Telemachus a nice young man.
By
the way,
what a nice young man Virgil

to
makes out Marcellus
have been
is
Praise, dispraise, or the quality of a thing
placed in the ablative, and also in the genitive

case
as
et
Vir paucorum verborum
magni appetitus
A man
A
of few words and large appetite.
Paterfamilias.
Vir multis miseriis
father of a family.
man
of
many
woes.
The man
coachman.
of most woes, however,
is
a hackney
Opus, need, and usus, need, require an ablative

case, as
g2
76

Didoni marito opus erat
Dido had need of a husband.

-^neae coena usus erat
-^neas had need of a dinner.
But opus appears

adjective for
to
be sometimes placed like an
necessarius, necessary, as
est
Regi Anthropophagoruin coquus opus
The King
of the Cannibal Islands wants a cook.
Which would chambre who

them?
serve his purpose best

dresses men,
or
a valet-dewho
roasts
a wit,
The Construction of Nouns Adjectve.

THE genitive CASE AFTER THE ADJECTIVE.
Adjectives
which signify
and the contrary
desire,
to
knowledge,
memory,
fear,
these, require a
genitive case, as
Est natura vetularum obtrectationis avida
The nature
of old
women
is
fond of scandal.
This particularly applies
to old
maids.
As
we
those
delightful creatures now-a-days,
not content with
being grey aspire to be actually blue ;

help recommending to them a
cannot
kind of study, for
which
their propensity
to cutting
up renders them
peculiarly
since
it
adapted;
we mean Anatomy.
And
we
is
on the foulest and most odious points
of character that they chiefly delight to dwell,

more especially suggest
to
77
pursuit of
them
the
is
Morbid Anatomy, as one which
likely to be
attended both with gratification and success.
Mens tempestatum
prsescia
A mind
A
foreknowing the weather.

been
piece of sea-weed has often, heretofore,

;
used as a barometer
this purposd"
but
it
is
only of late that
has been answered by a murphy.

beneficii
Immemor
The
that
sort of
Unmindful of a kindness.
kindness one
is least
likely to forget is
which our master used

us,
to
say he conferred
learning
upon
when he was
rod.
inculcating
by
means of the
ever, that he
We cannot help thinking,

:
how-
began at the wrong end.
Imperitus rerum
Unacquainted with the world,
i.
e.
Not 'up
to snuff.'
Much
controversy has been wasted in attempts to
determine the origin of the phrase " up to snuff."
Some have contended

the
that
it
was suggested by
not to
the
well-know quality possessed by
snuff, of clearing
head; but
this idea is far fetched,
say
absurd.
Others will have that the expression
was
first
derived from Snofe, or Snoffe, the
name of a cunning
time of the
rogue
who
;
flourished about
the
crusade
or
so that " up to Snoffe" signified as clever,

;
knowing, as Snoffe
and was
G 3
in
process of time
78

This opinion
is its
converted into " up to snuff."

deserving of notice
favour
is,
;
though the only argument in
that the phrase in question
was
in
vogue
long before the

the
discovery of tobacco.
is
Probably
it
soundest
view
that
which connects
in
with
the proper
name Znoufe, which

among
viii.
ancient
High-
Dutch
great.
is
equivalent to Mercury, whose reputation

the ancients
ii.
for astuteness
was exceedingly
13.
Conf.
Hookey- Walk,
24. Cheek.
Hok. Pok.
Wonk-Fum.
Marin, passim, with
a host of commentators, ancient and modern.
Roscius timidus
Deorum
fuit
Roscius was afraid of the Gods.

Adjectives ending in ax,
derived from
verbs,
also require a genitive case, as
Tempus edax rerum Time is the consumer of all things. Hence Time is sometimes figured as an alderman. Nouns partitive, nouns of number, nouns comparative and superlative, and certain adjectives put
partitively,
require
a genitive
case,
from which
also they take their
gender
as
:
Utrum horum mavis accipe Take which of those two things you had
between the dagger and the bowl of poison.
to to
rather.
So Queen Eleanor gave Fair Rosamond her choice

This,
our mind, would have been like choosing a tree
be hanged on.

Primus fidicinum
Orpheus was the
fuit
first
79
Orpheus
of fiddlers.
He is said to have charmed the hearts of broomstick^. Momus lepidissimus erat Deorum Momus was the funniest of the Gods.
:
Other deities
head.
may have made Jupiter shake his Momus used to make liim shake his sides.
te,
Sequimur
sancte deorum
We
rence
follow thee,
sacred deity.
Namely, the aforesaid Momus.

heathen god that
for,
He
is
the
only-
we
should have had
and certainly the
ever have sacrificed to at
much revethat we should only one The offering most all.
commonly made
to the
god of laughter was, proalso used with these

;
bably, a sacrifice of propriety.
But the above nouns are

Primus
inter philosophos
is
prepositions, a, ab, de, e, ex, inter, ante
as,
:
Democritus
est
Democritus
the
first
amongst philosophers.
to
And why
it
Because he alone was wise enough

laughing
is
find out that
better than crying.
He
was who
first
proved
to the
world that philosophy
and comicality
the
are, in fact,
one science
and that
forget
more we learn the more we laugh.

it
We
whether
remark,
was he
or
is
Aristotle the
who made
the
that
man
only
laughing animal
except the hyaena.
80

Secundus sometimes requires a dative case, as
Haud
ulli
veterum virtute secundus

none of the ancients
Inferior to
in valour.
Surely Virgil in saying
this,
had an eye
to
a hero,
whose fame has been perpetuated

a later poet.
in the verses of
"
Some talk of Alexander, and some of Pericles, Of Conon and Lysander, and Alcibiades
;
But of
all
the gallant heroes,
there
's
none
for
to
compare,
With my
ri-fol-de-riddle-iddle-lol to the British

!"
grenadier
An
to
it,
interrogative,
shall be of the
and the word which answers
same case and
tense,
except
;
words of a
different construction
be made use of
as
Quarum rerum Of what thinojs
nulla est satietas?

is
Pomorum.
?
there no fulness
Of
fruit.

Dr. Johnson used
to
81
say that he never got as
much
wall fruit as he could eat.
-JÛlnilui.il.nirulHlST
The Dative Case after the Adjective.

Adjectives by which advantage, disadvantage,
likeness, unlikeness, pleasure, submission, orrelation
to
any thing
is signified,
require a dative case

;
as
Astaci incocti patriae idonei sunt in pace
cocti
autem
in bello.
Raw
peace
;
lobsters are serviceable to their country in
but boiled ones in war.

things to get into.
of
Lobster's claws
are nasty
The Corporation
London seemed very much
afraid of the Police clause.
One
of the reasons
why
a soldier
is,
is
sometimes
is
called a lobster, probably
that the latter
marine animal.
Balsenffi persimile
Very
Qui
like a whale.
color albus erat
nunc
est contrarius albo

is
The
colour
which was white
now
contrary to
white.
82

people will swear white
is
Some
ends
;
black
to
gain their
and a
man who
will
do
this,
though he
may
not always be
Jucundus amicis
Pleasant
is
to his friends
nevertheless frequently so to his constituents.
Hither are referred nouns compounded of the

preposition con, as contubernalis, a comrade
milito,
;
comall
a fellow
soldier,
&c.
You must
you
con
such words attentively before you can construe

well, or the co;isequence will be, that
will be
considerably blown up,
if
not confoundedly flogged.

are also
Some
of these which signify similitude,
joined to a genitive case, as
Par uncti fulminis
Like greased lightning.
The
familiarity of our transatlantic friends with the

fluid, is
nature of the electric

discoveries
no doubt owing
to the
of
their
countrymen Franklin.
Q.
Was
the
lightning
which that philosopher drew
down from
example
?
the clouds, of the kind mentioned in the
Communis, common
free,
alienus, strange
immunis,
are joined to a genitive, dative, and also to
an ablative case, with a preposition, as
Aures longse communes asinorum sunt
Long
ears are
common
to asses.
83
Though musical
for
ears
are
not.
We
even doubt
whether they would have the slightest admiration
^ray-ham.
Non
Except
tails
sunt
Tails are
communes caudse hoininibus not common to men.

and
rats'-
coat-tails, shirt-tails, pig-tails,
to
which en-tails may perhaps

last are often cut off.
:
also be added,
though these
Non
alienus a poculo cerevisiae

to
Not averse
a pot of beer.
;
We should think we were not

our bread and butter.
and should as soon

quarrel with
think of engaging in an unnatural
Natus, born
commodus, convenient
;
incommo-
dus, inconvenient
utilis,
;
useful
fit,
inutilis, useless
vehemens, earnest
aptus,
are sometimes also
joined to an accusative case with a preposition, as
Natus ad laqueum
Born
to
a halter.
84

for this
Those who are reserved
exalted destiny,
are said to enjoy a peculiar immunity from drowning.
Is this the reason

1
why watermen
are such a
set of rogues
To prevent mistakes, it should be mentioned, that the watermen here meant are those who, by
their
own
to
account, are so called from their office
being
shut the doors of hachiey coaches.

hills,
Verbal adjectives ending in
taken passively,
ending
in
and
participles
made
;
adjectives
dus,
as
;
NuUi penetrabilis astro Penetrable by no star not fond of
acting ?
O O
venerande mihi Listen
te luget
Olympus
the
Listen, to be venerated
by me
Olympic
bewails thee.
The Accusative Case after the Adjective.

The measure
in the
of quantity
is
put after adjectives,
accusative, the ablative, and the genitive
case, as
Anguis centum pedes longus
A
sibus.
snake a hundred
feet long.
Arbor gumnifera,
alta mille et
quingentis pas-
gum-tree a mile and a half high.
Aranea, lata pedum denum
spider ten feet broad.
85
An
tives
accusative case
is
sometimes put
after adjec-
and participles, where the preposition secunto
dum, appears
Like
be understood, as
asello similis
:
Os humerosque
to a cod-fish as to his
head and shoulders.
Some men
their
to increase
are exceedingly like a cod-fish, as to
head and shoulders, and they often endeavour

this
natural resemblance as
gills.
much
as
possible,
by wearing
The Ablative Case after the Adjective.

Adjectives which relate to plenty or want, sometimes require an ablative, sometimes a genitive case, as
Amor
Love
et melle et felle est foecundissimus

is
very
full
is
both of honey and
gall.
The honey The
of love
we do not know exactly what.

it is
Honey, however,
is
Latin for love,astheIrishman said.
gall of love consists in
First.
Tight boots, in which
often
necessary
86
to

do penance before our
Ladys window.
it
This
is
at all events very galling.
Secondly. In lover's sighs, to which

cates their peculiar bitterness.
communilove
Thirdly. Another very galling thing in
is
being cut out.

Fourthly. Love is one of the passions treated of by Gall and Spurzheim. Adjectives and subsantives govern an ablative
case, signifying the
cause
and the form,
or
the
manner
of a thing, as
erat
Demosthenes vociferatione raucus
Demosthenes was hoarse with bawling.
Nomine grammaticus, re barbarus A grammarian in name in reality a barbarian.

:
Like many of the old masters

painters
we
do not mean
though
we
certainly allude to brothers of

it
the brush
perhaps
Does
to
would be better
on account of
reader twig
to call thern
brothers of the angle,

to the rod.
their partiality
?
the
If so,
it
is
unnecessary
branch out into a discussion with

at'
regard to the nature of the barbarity hinted
its
kind of barbarity which, though

perpetrators to be
race, connects
it
may
proclaim
by no means
allied to the feline
them most decidedly with the canine

indignus, unworthy
prceditus.
species.
Dignus, worthy

endued
torris,
;
87
;
captus, disabled
;
contentus, content
ex;
banished
fretus, relying
upon
liber, free
with adjectives signifying price, require an ablative

case, as
Leander dignus erat meliore
fato
Leander was worthy of a better

Poor fellow
!
fate.
first to
be head over ears in love, and

!
then over head and ears in the sea
Shocking
What an heroic young man he must have been. What a duck, too, the fair Hero must have thought
him as she watched him from her lonely tower,
nearing her every moment,
as he cleft with lusty
arm
the
foaming herring-pond.
We
mean
else
!
the
Hellespont
but
to
no matter.
What
a goose he
must have been considered by any one
who
happened
know
of his nightly exploits

last
!
How
If
miserably he was gulled at
Never mind.
Leander went
to the fishes for love,
many a
better
man
than he, has, before and since, gone, from the

to the dogs.
same cause,
Conscientia
procuratoris
solidis
sex,
denariis
octo, venale est:
lawyer's conscience
is
to
be sold
for six
and
eightpence.
Some of
these,
sometimes admit a genitive case, as

deae
:
Carmina digna
Verses worthy of a goddess.
H 2
88

the following verses are worthy of a god-
Whether
dess or not,
we
if
shall not
to
attempt to decide
all
they a
were addressed
being who,
one at
events
at least to
idolizing constitutes a goddess,
may,
in
perhaps, be termed one.
We
met with them
turning over the pages of an album.
Lines by a Fond Lover.

Lovely maid, with rapture swelling,
Should these pages meet thine eye.
Clouds of absence
soft dispelling
Vacant memory heaves a
sigh.
As
So
the rose, with fragrance weeping.
Trembles
to the tuneful
wave,
my
heart shall twine unsleeping,

it
Till
canopies the grave
Though
Joy
for
another's smiles requited,

fate
Envious
my doom
should be
ever disunited,
!
Think, ah
think, at times on
me
Oft amid the spicy gloaming.
Where
Fond Loves
the brakes their songs
instil.
affection silent
to linger
roaming.
by the
rill
There when echo's voice consoling.
Hears
the nightingale complain,

Gentle sighs
89
Bind
my lips controlling, my soul in beauty's chain.
Oft in slumbers deep recesses,

I
thy mirror'd image see
Fancy mocks
I
the vain caresses

like
would lavish
is
a bee
But how vain

Hark,
I
glittering sadness
hear distraction's knell
Torture gilds
my
heart with madness
Now
for
ever fare thee well
AN ALEDM AUTHOR.
It
would be interesting as well as instructive
to
settle the difference
between love verses and non-
sense verses,
so.
if this
were the proper place

to the
for
doing
:
But we are not yet come
Prosody
nor
shall
we
arrive there very soon unless
we
get on
with the Syntax.
h3
::
90
THE COMIC LATIN GRAMMAU.

Comparatives,
Avhen
they
may
require
be explained
by
the
word quam,
than,
an ablative
Achilles
Achilles
F'asi
Agamemnone velocior erat was a faster man than Agamemnon.

in
men
modern times are very apt
to
outrun
the constable.
Tanto, by so much, quanto, by
how much,
;
hoc,
by
this,
eo,
by
this,
and quo, by which

signify
with
some other words which

exceeding
;
the measure of
likewise setate, by age,
and natu, by
birth, are often joined to

latives, as
comparatives and super-
Tanto deformissimus, quanto sapientissimus philosophorum.
By
so
much
the ugliest,
by how must
the wisest
of philosophers.
Such an one was Socrates.

to
It is all
;
very well
it
have a contemplative disposition
but
need
not be accompanied by a contemplative nose.
Quo
This
plus habent, eo plus cupiunt

the more they want.
the
The more they have

is
a curious fact in
considered
in
natural
history of
school-boys,
relation to roast
beef
and plum pudding.
Maximum
I
cetate
virum
in tota
Kentuckia contudi
whopped
the oldest
man
in all
Kentucky,
the comic latin grammar,
91
The Construction of Pronouns.

All those Avho would understand the construction
of pronouns, should take care to be well versed in
the distinction
of
between
meum
and tuum, ignorance

neces-
which often gives
rise to the disagreeable
sity of
becoming
too intimately acquainted with
quod.
Mei, of me,
of us, vestri,
tui,
of thee, sui, of himself, nostri,

(the genitive cases of their
of you,
tu,
primitives eô,
signified, as
&c.) are used
when a person
is
Languet desiderio
tui
He
You
languishes for want of you.
cannot give a more acceptable piece of inforto
mation than the above,

fairer
any young lady.

like
to
The
have
and more amiable sex always
something
if
not to love, at least to pity.
Parsque
tui lateat
corpore clausa meo.
Eton Gram.
And
Or
a part of you
may
lie
!
shut up
in
my
body.
rather
may
it
so lie
How
forcibly a sucking
pig hanging up outside a pork-butcher's shop always

recals this beautiful line of Ovid's to the
mind
Mens, mine,
tuus, thine, suus, his
nice his'n, nosier, ours, vester, yours, are used
own (Cockwhen
;
action, or the possession of a thing is signified
as
Qui bona quae non sunt sua furtim subripit,
ille
Tempore quo
capitur, carcere clausus erit
92
Him
Ven
as prigs wot isn
't
his'n,
to pris'n.
he's cotch'd
'11
go
These possessive pronouns,

noster,
meus,
tuus,
siius,
and
vester, take after
them these genitive

of him
alone,
cases,
ipsius,
of himself,
solius,
unius, of one, duormn, of two, trium, of three, &c.
omnium, of
all,
plurium,
of more, paucorum, of
few, cujusque, of every one, and also the genitive cases of participles, which are referred to the primitive
word understood
drank six pots
as
:
Meis unius impensis pocula sex exhausi

I
to
my own
cheek.
to
We wonder that
say
so.
any one should have the face
Sui and suus are reciprocal pronouns, that
is,
they have always relation to that which went before,
and was most
to
be noted in the sentence, as

Jonathanus nimium admiratur se
:
93
Jonathan admires himself too much.

Parcit erroribus suis,
He
spares his
own
errors.
Magnopere Jonathanus rogat ne

If
se derideas, Jona-
than earnestly begs that you would not laugh at him.
you
do, take care that

fine days.
he does not blow you up
one of these
These demonstrative pronouns,

are thus distinguished
to
:
hie,
iste,
and
ille
hie points out the nearest
me
iste
him who
is
by you
us.
ille
him who
is
at a distance
from both of
In making
as pointers.
game
of the Syntax,
we
regard them
When
latter,
hie and
ille
are referred to two things or
persons going before, hie generally relates to the

ille to
the former, as
Richardus Thomasque suum de more bibebant,
Ebrius hie vappis, ebrius
ille
mero
Both Dick and
Tom
caroused
away
like swine,
Tom
drunk with swipes, and Dicky drunk with
wine.
The Construction
of Verbs.
The Nominative Case after the Verb.

Verbs substantive, as sum,
be,
fio, I
am, forem,
;
might
am made,
nominor,
I
existo, I
I
am
verbs passive of
appellor, I
calling, as
am named,
am
called, dicor,
am
said, vocor, I
am
called,
nun-
94
cupor,
I
I
am
seen, habeor, I
am named, and the like to them, as videor, am accounted, existimor, I am

the
thought, have
then), as
same cases before and
after
Adeps viridis est summum bonum Green fat is the chief good. Even among the ancients, turtles were the emblems
:
of love
which, next
first
to eating
and drinking, has

pursuit. This
first,
;
always been the

fact
object of
human
proves,
very
satisfactorily,
two things,
their proficiency in the science of
gastronomy and,
secondly, their extreme susceptibility of the tender

passion.
Pileus vocatur tegula
hat
is
called a
tile.
Likewise
all
verbs in a manner admit after them
an adjective, which agrees with the nominative case

of the verb, in case, gender, and number, as

Pii orant taciti.
95
Eton Gram.
The
Is this a
si}'
pious pray silently.

1
rap at the Quakers
The Genitive Case after the Verb.
Sum
to
requires a genitive case as often as
it
sig-
nifies possession, duty, sign, or that
which
relates
any thing
as
Quod rapidam trahit vEtatem pecus est Melibosi, The cattle wot drags the Age, fast coach, is Meliboeus's.
Alas
that such an
!
Age
let
should be banished by the

us hear the
Aâ
of rail-roads
Coachman's Lament.
Air.
" Oh give me but my Arab steed."

my
ribbons, and, alack
!
Farewell
Farewell
my
tidy drag
Mail-coach-men now have got the sack,
And
engineers the bag.
My
heart and whip alike are broke

I've lost
my
varmint team
That used
to cut
away
go
like
smoke,
But could
It is,
n't
like
cuj),
steam.
indeed, a bitter
Thus
to
be sent to pot
My
bosom
boils at boiling
up
gallop or a trot.
96
My
very brain with fury
's
rack'd,
;
That railways are the rage

I'm sure you'll never find them
act,
Like our old English stage.
A
I
man whose passion
's
crost, is sore,
;
Then pray excuse my^;e^ ne'er was overturn d before,

But now am quite
upset.
These nominative cases are excepted from the

above
noster,
rule,
our, vester, your,
meum, mine, tuum, thine, suum, humanum, human,

like,
his,
bel-
luinum brutal, and the
as
97
Non
est
tuum aviam
instruere
Don't teach your grandmother
to
suck eggs.
Humanum
It is
est inebriari.
frailty
human
or an amiable
weakness
to get
drunk.
it
Lord Byron proves
to be
human
frailty.
" 3Ian being reasonable, must get drunk."
UEASONABLE CREATURE.
Another poet (anon.) proves

one,
it
to
be an amiable
exists be-
by establishing the analogy which

it
tween
"
and an intoxication of another kind

is like
Love
a dizziness,
Never
lets
a poor
man
go about his business."
Verbs of accusing, condemning, advising, acquitting, and the like, require a genitive case which
signifies the
charge
as
probri,
Qui alterum accusat

eri oportet.
cum ipsum
se intu-
It is
fit
that he
who accuses another
of dishonesty
should look into himself.
98
If this
could
maxim were acted up to, what we ever get to frame an indictment 1
attorney
Furti damnatus, " ties menses" adeptus est
Beingcondemnedof theft, he had "three months."
We
ton,"
do not see
much fun
that
in that.
We
cannot help
thinking, however,
" Three Months at Brix(at least a thief-taking)
would form a taking

a novel.
title for
Admoneto magistrum squalidarum vestium

Put the master
That
is if
in
mind of
his seedy clothes.
you want a
(/ood dressing.
is
This genitive case
sometimes changed into an
ablative, either with or without a preposition, as
Putavi de calendis
Aprilibus
te
esse
admo-
nendum
I
first
thought that you ought

of April.
to
be reminded of the
Young
reader
were you ever, on the above anni-
versary, sent to the cobbler's for pigeons' milk, and
dismissed with strap-oil for your pains?
Were
from
1
your domestic and alimentive affections ever sported

with by the false intelligence that a
letter
home and a Or worse,

stones
1
large cake
were waiting
for
you below
did some waggish,
but inconsiderate
friend ever send you a fool's-cap and a
hamper of
Reader, of a more advanced age, were you ever
99
might
but we cannot
sell
go on
Oh
Matilda
have been your slave
but
we
it
was
cruel of
you
to
us in such a manner.
alter, the other,
Uterque, both, nullus, none,

ter,
neu-
neither of the two, alius, another, ambo, both,

to
and the superlative degree, are joined

that kind only in the ablative case, as
Fratris,
verbs of
an
asini,
trucidationis
:
accusas
me
Utroque, sed sceleris unius
Do you accuse me of killing my donkey 1 Of both but of one crime.

;
brother or
my
Satago,
to
be busy about a thing, misereor and
miseresco, to pity, require a genitive case, as
Qui
ducit
uxorem rerum
satagit
full
He who
business.
marries a wife has his hands
of
'
We
O
!
hear frequently of lovers being distracted.

so.
Husbands are much more

tergi miserere
!
mei non digna
ferentis
Oh
have pity on
my
back,
suffering
things
undeserved.
Reminiscor, to remember, obliviscor,
to to
forget,
memini,
to
remember, recorder,
to
call
mind,
admit a genitive or accusative case, as

Reminiscere nonarum Novembrium
:
Remember
the fifth of
November.
are
let off
No wonder
that so
many squibs i2
on
that
100
day
;

considering the
it.
political
feeling connected
with
Hoc
te
spectantem
this
me meminisse
all
precor
When
you see remember me.

anxious
How
particularly
young men
and
women who are
lovers,
and
all
waiters and chamber-
maids, whether they are lovers or no, besides coach-
men and porters of all kinds, seem
to
be rememhered.
A coachman
lover
fare.
;
in one respect especially resembles a
he always wishes to be remembered by his
Potior, to gain, is joined either to a genitive or to
an ablative case, as
Xantippe, marito subacto, femoralium potita
fiiit.
Xantippe, her husband being overcome, gained

the breeches.
Terentius Thrace potitus est
Terence got a Tartar.
At least he said he did, when he who would n't let him come.
took the prisoner
The Dative Case after the Verb.

All verbs govern a dative case of that thing to
or for
which any thing
is
gotten or taken away, as
Diminuam
I will
tibi
caput
break your head.
Eheu
mihi circulum ademit
Oh
dear, he has taken
away my hoop
101
What
In the
a thing
it is
to
be a junior boy
Verbs of various kinds belong

first
to the
above
rule.
place verbs signifying advantage or dis-
advantage govern a dative case, as

Judaei ad
commodandum
live to
nobis vivunt
us.
]
'
The Jews
accommodate
Or accommodate Of these juvo,
us to live
which
laedo delecto,
and some
others,
require an accusative case, as
Maritum quies plurimum juvat

Rest very much delighteth a married man
he can get
it.
when
102

case, as
:
Verbs of comparing govern a dative
Ajacem " Surdo" componere

I
ssepe solebam
was
often accustomed to
compare Ajax
to the
"
Deaf un,"
not because he was hard of

cum
;
hearing,
but hard in hitting.
Sometimes, however, they require an ablative

case
with the preposition

case
sometimes an
accusative
inter, as
with the
prepositions
ad and
Comparo Pompeium cum gloho

I
nivali
compare Pompey with a snow-ball.

is
Pompey
Whether
called in the
schools a proper name.

for
it is
a proper name
It
a nigger or not,
may
be questioned.
may
;
also be doubted
whe-
ther a negro can ever rightly be called " snow-ball,"
except he be an ice
man
in
which case even

it is
though he should be the knave of clubs,

that he ought never to be black balled.
obvious
Si ad
pensum verberatio comparetur

compared
to
nihil est
it is
If a flogging be
an imposition,
nothing.
flogging
is
a fly-blow, or at least a êa-blow

to the
to the boy,
and a task only

is
master
whereas
as imposition
a task
to the
boy, and very often
a verse task.
Verbs of giving and of restoring govern a dative

case, as
103
:
Learius unicuique filiarum dimidium coronse dedit
Lear gave
his daughters half-a-crown a-piece.
Hence we
Britons.
are enabled to gain
some notion of
the
great value of
money
in the time
of the Ancient
Verbs of promising and of paying govern a

dative case; as
Menelaus Paridi fustuarium promisit
Menelaus promised Paris a drubbing.
'.'
Gubernatoris" est pendere sartoribus pecuniam

the place of " the governor" to
learn
It is
pay
tailors.
it is
Hence young men may

to
how
desirable
be " in statu pupillari."
True, in that state of
104
felicity,

they are somewhat under control, but the
like nature,
above example, and many others of a

sufficiently prove, that
to the responsibilities of
such restriction, compared
manhood,
is
but a minor
inconvenience.
Verbs of commanding and

case, as
telling
govern a dative
Alexander, vinosus, animis imperare non potuit

Alexander,
when drunk,
could not
command
his
temper.
Thus, in a state of beer,

slaughter at least,
Clitus.
he committed manhis friend
by kilHng and slaying
We
we
could not resist the temptation to
men-
tion this fact, since, as

its
we have
so often laughed at
narration in those interesting compositions called
themes,
thought there must needs be something

it.
very funny about

remarked,
for
Alexander the Great, be
it
the
special behoof of schoolboys,
furnishes an example of any virtue or vice descanted
on in any prose task or poem under the sun.

Antonio dixit Augustus Lepidum veteratoreni
fuisse.
Augustus
told
Antony
that
Lepidus
was
humbug.
We don't know exactly where this historical fact

is
mentioned.
Lepidus
is
di
funny name.
rule, rego, to rule.
Except, from the foregoing
105
;
guberno, to govern, which have an accusative case
tempero and moderor, to
rule,
which have some;
times a dative, sometimes an accusative case
as
Luna regit ministros The moon rules the ministers.

:
That
is to
say,
when
it is
at the full,
and resembles
a great 0.
Prseco pauperes gubernat
The beadle governs
the paupers.
sibi
Non semper
temperat ipse
He
He
does not always govern himself.

mollit proprios, nee temperat iras
:
Non animos
neither softens his

his anger.
own mind,
nor tempers
Ecce, Ducrow moderatur equos

Lo,
Q.
Ducrow manages
is
the horses.
like
Why
?
general
officer
a writing-
master
A. Because he
is
a ruler of lines.
case, as
Verbs of trusting govern a dative

Credite, focmineae,
juvencs,
committere
menti,
Nil nisi lene decet.
Believe me, young men,

thing to
it
is
fit
to entrust no-
a female mind but what
is soft.
In
lady.
fact,
soft nothings are fittest for the ear of a
106

Pomarius
poetae
non credit
trusts not the poet.
it
The costermonger
How
wrong, therefore,
is
to
call
him a green
grocer.
Verbs of complying with and

a dative case, as
of opposing govern
Nunquam
obtemperat
tiro
hodiernus magistro
his master.
modern apprentice never obeys
Verbs of threatening and of being angry govern

a dative case, as
Utrique latronum mortem est minitatus
He threatened By presenting a
them.
sailor
death
to
both of the robbers,
pistol right
and
left
at each of
This when done by some well-disposed

in
a melodrame, constitutes a situation of
thrilling interest.
107
Sum with its compounds,

a dative case, as
except possum, governs
Oculi nigri non semper sunt faciei ornamentum
Black eyes are not always an ornament

face.
to the
Verbs compoundedwith these adverbs, bene, well,

satis,
enough, male,
ill,
and with these prepositions,

in,
prse, ad, con, sub, ante, post, ob,
inter,
for the
most part govern a dative case, as

Saginatio multis hominibus benefacit
Cramming does good

For instance,
in
it
to
many men.
docs good to aldermen, especially
these days of reform, hy enlarging the Corpo-
ration.
fits
Cramming,
or rather the effect of
it,
bene-
medical men,
who
again do good
in another
to their pati-
ents
by cramming them
of
way.
is
There
is
also a species
cramming which
found very
108

by enabling
certain
serviceable at the Universities,
students to pass in a crowd.
OH
niCRE
'S
C'MPLIMENT.
In this respect however
it
differs essentially
from
aldermanic cramming, which enhances the
difficulty
of such a feat in a very remarkable manner.

Puellse, aliae aliis prselucere student
Girls endeavour to outshine one another.
And
yet they
make
light, as
much
as they can,
of
each others charms and accomplishments.

Intempestive parum longe prospicienti Doctori
adlusit.
'
"SottUi. 'Côf^-v^
109
He
joked unseasonably
on
the
short-sighted
Doctor.
Johnson was not so short-sighted as

a joke.
to
be blind
to
Not a few
of the verbs mentioned in the last rule,

;
sometimes change the dative into another case

Praestat ingenio alius alium
:
as
One exceeds
another in ability.
Thus one boy learns Latin and Greek

the rest
at
;
better than
another learns slang.

at
One
is
a good hand
construing, another
climbing.
Some boys
of a small
are peculiarly skilled at casting accounts, others in
casting stones.
Here we have a boy
appetite
appetite
and many words, there one of a large

and few words.
Sometimes precocious
sometimes
talent is evinced for playing the fiddle,
110
for

playing a stick
is
sometimes, again, a strong

fool.
;
propensity
discovered for playing the

it
This
that
boy makes verses, as
were,
by
inspiration
boy shows an equal capacity in making mouths.
The most
are
peculiar talent, however, and the one most

is that
exclusive of all others,
of riding.
Those who
destined to attain great proficiency in this sci-
ence, can seldom
do any thing else
and usually
begin their career by being horsed at school.

Est, for habeo to have, governs a dative case, as
Est mihi qui vestes custodit avunculus omnes

I
have an uncle who takes care of

it
all
my
clothes.
Suppetit,
sufficeth, is like to this, as
Pauper enim non

For he
is
est cui
rerum suppetit usus

the
not poor, to
whom
use of things
suffices.
The two
last
examples must suggest a rather

to
alarming idea to those who are accustomed

pitiate the relation to
pro-
whom we have just

?
alluded,
by relinquishing
query
sons,
their habits.
Is it possible that
he can ever use one's things
We
recommend
this
to the serious consideration of theatrical per-
and
all
others
who
are addicted to spouting.
Sum
case, as
Avith
many
others admits a double dative
Exitio est avidis alvus pueris
The
belly
is
the destruction of greedy boys.
Particularly those of
Eton College.

Sometimes
mihi,
is
Ill
or also
this dative case

for
tibi,
or sibi,
added
the sake of elegance in expres-
sion, as
Cato suam
sibi
uxorem Hortensio vendidit

to
Cato sold his own wife
Hortensius.
Some
is,
say he only lent her.
The
fact
most probably
that the lady, being tired of her husband, wished
to
be
Bi-loan.
K 2
112
The Accusative Case after the Verb.

Verbs
transitive, of
what kind soever, whether
active, deponent, or
common, require an accusative
Procuratorem
fugito,
nam
subdolus idem est
Avoid an
rogue.
attorney, for the
same
is
a cunning
Yet
the legal profession
are always
boasting
of
their deeds.
Verbs neuter have an accusative case of a

signification to themselves, as
like
Pomarii asinus duram servit servitutem
Poor animal
A coster-monger's donkey serves a hard servitude. A Sterne heart was once melted by
!
thy sufferings
how
?
then must they affect that of
the gentle reader
There are some verbs which have an accusative

case
by a
figure, as
Nee vox hominem

Nor does your
ture's.
sonat
voice sound like a
human
crea-
This
may
be
said of boys
of various
kinds
a,9
pot-boys, butcher's boys, baker's boys, and other
boys who are in the habit of bawling down areas

also
of several descriptions
of
men, as cab-men,
coach-men, watch-men, and dust-men.
may
likewise
be asserted of
The same some women, such

as apple-women, oyster-Avomen, fish-women,
113 and
match-women.
clerks,
Here
also
the singing of charity
children of both sexes,
and the voices of parishand,

lastly,
may be
specified,
of
many
foreigners
whose names terminate
in ini.
Verbs of asking, of teaching, of

of concealing,
cases, as
clothing,
and
commonly
govern
two accusative
Ego docebo
I'll teach
te,
adolescentule,
lessons,
lectiones tuas
you your
young man.
vocative
This speech
is
usually the
prelude to something
which
elicits that
exemplification of the
in
case which has been given
the
first
part of the
Grammar.
Some
even
verbs of this kind have an accusative case
in the passive voice, as

:
Bis denos posceris versus de scoparum manubrio
You
are required to
make twenty
verses on a
broomstick.
Why
itself
should not a broomstick form the subject of
a poetical effusion, when the material of the broom

is
so
often
?
used in schools
to stimulate
in-
ventive genius
K 3
114
THE COMIC LATIN GRAMMAK.

appellative are
Nouns
commonly added with a

sequae Palladis ibant
preposition to verbs which denote motion, as
Interea ad
templum non
Crinibus Iliades passis. In the
Virgil.
mean time
the Trojan
woman went
to the
temple of unfriendly Pallas with their hair about

their ears.
How odd
occasion
to
they must have looked.
Here we take
to lose
to
remind schoolboys never

of giving
an
opportunity
a comic rendering
any
word
or phrase susceptible thereof,
which they
may
To
meet with in the course of their reading.

say " crinibus passis",
"
it
with dishevelled hair"
would be
lation.
to give
a very feeble and spiritless transliterally
Vir
is
construed
called hero,
man ; some
school-masters will have

to
we propose
fugam,
;
translate
it
cove.
;
So dapes may be rendered

aspera Juno, crusty Juno ;
grub, or perhaps prog
animain
efflare,
to kick the bucket ; capere
to cut one's stick, or lucky ; confectus,
knocked up
fraudatus,
choused ; contundere,
to
whop, &c. &c.
The Ablative Case after the Verb.

Every verb admits an
action, as
ablative case, signifying

or the
the instrument, or the cause,
manner of an
Pulvere nitrato Catilina senatum subruere voluit

Catiline wished to
tiline
blow up the Parliament.
Ca-
was a regular Guy.
115
in the
A noun
Ovidius
dere fecit
of price
is
put after some words
ablative case, as
solidis
duobus
fibulas
siphonem ascen-
Ovid pawned his buckles for two shillings. The sipho was a tube, pipe, or spout, projecting
from the shops of pawnbrokers, of
whom
there
is
every reason
to
believe that there were a great
many
in ancient
Rome
to
Into this sipho the pledges
where placed
de
in order
be conveyed
to the
adytum
or secret recess of the dwelling.
Vide Casaubon
Avunc
Vili,
Roman.
low
rate, for
at a
paulo, for
little,
minimo.
for
very
little,
magno,
much, nimio,
for too
much,
plurimo, for very much, dimidio, for half, duplo, for
twice as much, are often put by themselves, the
word, pretio, price, being understood, as

Vili venit cibus caninus
Dog's meat
is
sold at a low rate.
These genitive cases put without substantives are

excepted, tanti, for so much, quanti, for
how much,
pluris, for more, minoris, for less, quantivis, for as
much
as you please, tantidem, for just so much,

for
quantilibet,
what you
will,
quanticunque
for
how much
soever, as
:
Non
nihili, of
es tanti
You're no great shakes.
Flocci, of a lock of wool, nauci, of a nut-shell,
nothing, assis, of a penny, pih, of a hair,
116
Imjus,

of tins,
teruncii, of a farthing,
are
added
very properly to verbs of esteeming, as
Nee verberationem
cussionem
I
flocci
:
pendo, nee ferula per-
pili aestiino
don't
value a flogging a straw, nor do
regard
a spatting a hair.
A
front,
boy who can say
this,
must have a brazen
and an iron back, and be altogether a lad of

of loading, and
viettle.
Verbs of abounding, of
their
filling,
contraries,
are joined to an ablative case, as
Tauris abundat Hibernia

Ireland aboundeth in bulls.
This circumstance
rise to the
it
most probably was which gave
Tales of the O'Hara family.
We
the
throat.
once heard a son of Erin,

of bleeding from
while undergoing
the arm,
operation
remark
that that
would be an easy way of cutting one's

of these
Some
case, as
sometimes
govern a genitive
Optime ostrearum implebantur
They had a
capital
blow out of oysters.

that these are the only
We
are
sorry to remark
native productions patronized by great people.
Fungor, to discharge,
vescor, to live
fruor, to enjoy, utor, to use,
upon, dignor, to think one's self
tHE COMIC LATIN GRAMMAR.

wottliy, muto, to
117
change, communico, to
commu-
nicate, supersedeo, to
pass by, are joined to an
ablative case, as
Qui
officiis.
adipisci coenas optimas volet, leonis fungatur
He who
shall desire to obtain excellent dinners,

office
should discharge the
of a lion.
In which case he will
come
in for the " lion's share."
Q.
Why
]
is
the lion of a party like one of the
grand sources of prejudice
mentioned by Lord
Bacon
A. Because he
is
the Idol of the den.
118
Mereor,

to
deserve, with
ill,
these adverbs, bene,

melius, better, pejus,
well, satis, enough, male,
worse,
optime, very well,

ablative
pessime, very
the
ill,
is
joined to an
de, as
case with
preposition
De
The
libitinario
medicus bene meretur
doctor deserves well of the undertaker.

it
Notwithstanding
the doctor,
might at
first
sight appear, that
in furnishing funerals,
invades the
undertaker's province.
Some verbs
case, as
of receiving, of being distant, and
of taking away, are sometimes joined to a dative
Augustus
eripuit mihi nitorem
Augustus has taken the shine out of me.

Last Dying Speech of
M. Antony.
An
ablative case, taken absolutely,
is
added
to
some verbs, as
Porcis volentibus Isetissime epulabimur
:
Please the pigs we'll have a jolly good dinner.
The pig had divine honours paid

Greeks.
to
it
by the ancient
as
Jos. Scalig. de
Myst. Eleusin.
An
verbs,
ablative case of the part affected, and

case,
is
by
the poets an accusative
added
to
some
Qui animo
aegrotat,
eum
aera risum
moventem
the laugh-
ducere oportet.
He who
ing gas.
is
sick in
mind should breathe
119
Much
learned controversy has been expended in

to
endeavouring
the exhalation
determine whether this gas was

it
by which
is
supposed that the
ancient Pythonesses were affected.
Rubet nasum
His nose
Candet genas
is red.
His cheeks are
pale.
Some
of these words are used also with the geni-
tive case, as
Angitur animi juvenis

natur.
iste,
et
mundum
indig-
That young man

with the world.
is
grieved in mind and disgusted
Such a man
young man.
is
called
by the
ladies an interesting
Verbs Passive.
An
ablative case of the doer (but with the pre-
position a or ab going before), and sometimes also
a dative case,
is
added
to
verbs passive, as
Darius eleganter ab Alexandro victus est
Darius was elegantly licked by Alexander.
The
other cases continue to belong to verbs pas-
sive which belonged to
them as verbs
active, as
Titanes
laesae
majestatis accusati sunt

indicted for high treason.
The Titans were
And
being found guilty Avere quartered in a very
uncomfortable manner, as well as drawn by various
120
artists,

whose
to
skill
in execution
has been much
commended.
Vapulo,
to
be beaten, veneo,
exulo,
to
to
be
sold, liceo,
fio,
be prized,
be banished,
to
be
made,
tion,
neuter passives, have a passive construc-
as
A
It
prseceptore vapulabis.
will be beaten
Eton Gram.
You
here at
by the master.
is
appears to us that vapulo, to be beaten,

all
events more susceptible of a passive
construction than a funny one.
Malo a cive
spoliari
quam ab
hoste venire.
Eton
sold
Gram.
I
had rather be stripped by a
citizen than
by an enemy. The Romans were regularly sold by the enemy for once, when they had to go under the yoke.
Verbs of the Infinitive Mood.

Verbs of the
also
infinitive
mood
are put after
some
verbs, participles, and adjectives,
and substantives
by
the poets, as
fecit
Timotheus ursos saltare

This was done in ancient as
Timotheus made the bears dance.

it
is in
modern times,
by playing
the
Pandean
pipes.
Inconcinnus erat cerni Telamonius Ajax
Ajax
(ut refer unt) vir
bonus
ire
minor
121
;
The Telamonian Ajax was a rum un to look at The lesser Ajax (as they say) a good un to go. The Grecians used to call Ajax senior, the fighting cock, and Ajax junior, the running cock. Verbs of the infinitive mood are sometimes placed alone by the figure ellipsis, as Siphonum de more oculis demittere fluctus
Dardanidae
:
The Trojans (began understood)
to
pipe their eyes.
As
for
^neas
he might have been a town crier.
Gerunds and Supines

govern the cases of their own verbs, as
EfFeror studio pulices industries videndi
I
am
transported with the desire of seeing the
industrious fleas.
122
Gerunds.
"
When
Dido found ^neas would not come,

in silence,
di
She mourned
Gerunds
stantives
in
and was Di-do-dum."
have the same construction as

certain sub-
genitive cases,
and depend both on
and adjectives, as
Londinensem innatus amor civem urget edendi
An innate love of eating excites the London citizen.

People are accustomed
to
utter a great deal of
cant about the intellectual poverty of civic magistrates,
and common councilmen
in general
but
it
must be allowed that those respectable individuals have often a great deal in them.
TUtlTl
ALDEKMANICUS.
Gerunds
ablative,
in
do have the same construction with

gerunds in
and
dum
with accusative
cases, as
Scribendi ratio conjuncta
cum loquendo
est
The means
of writing are joined with speaking.
123
Some things are written precisely after the writer's way of speaking. We once, for example, saw the
following notice posted in a gentleman's preserve.
Whear
Thes
Varmint,
'as
Gins and Engens are Set on

for
Grouns
the
Destruction
Of
Any
trespassing Will be prossy-
Cuted a-cordin Too Law. Locus ad agendum amplissimus

:
A place
It
very honourable
to
plead
in.
may be
questioned whether Cicero would have
said this of the
Old Bailey.
is signified,
When necessity
the gerund in duni
is
used without a preposition, the verb est being added,
Cavendum est ne deprensus sis You must take care you 're not
caught
out.
124

of advice of special importance to school-
A piece
boys on
shirking
many
occasions,
;
such as the following
down town
making
devils, or letting off
gunpowder behind the

and orchards
school, or in the
yard
con-
ducting a foray or predatory excursion in gardens

;
emulating Jupiter, a
la
Salmoneus,
in his attribute of Cloud-Compelling
by blowing a
cat,
cloud, or to speak in the vernacular, indulging in a
cigar
hoisting a frog
tailing a
dog or
or in
any other way acting contrary

the Animals' Friend Society
;
to
the precepts of
learning to construe
on the Hamiltonian system

birch-rods
multis
aliis
furtivel}'
denuding the
of their
" budding honours."
Cum
quae nunc perscribere longum est.

also changed into nouns adjective, as
Gerunds are
Ad
It is
faciendos versus molestum est
a bore to
make
verses.
This being a self-evident proposition,

enlarge upon
it.
we
shall not
The supine
in
um
signifies actively,
and follows
a verb expressing motion to a place, as
Spectatum veniunt, veniunt spectentur ut
ipsae
They come
selves
to see,
they come that they them-
may be
seen.
So
said,
or
sung the poet Ovid.

in his time in
?
Was
there an
opera at
Rome
The supine
signifies passively,
and follows
nouns adjective, as
125
esu turpe
:
Quod
be eaten.
olfactu foedum est,

is foul to
idem
est et
is
That which
be smelled,
also nasty to
Except venison,
onions,
and cheese.
Nouns
of time and Place.

Time.
Tempus time. There is a story, mentioned (we quote from memory) by the learned Joe Miller;
of a fellow
who
seeing
it
scribed upon a clock, took

artificer.
"Tempus Fugit" for the name of
in-
the
Persons
who have
lived a
hngiime
;
in the world,
are generally accounted saeje
and are sometimes

more
considered to have had a good seasoning.
Nouns which
commonly
signify a part of time are put
in the ablative case, as
Nemo mortalium omnibus horis sapit No mortal man is wise at all hours.
The excuse
of a philosopher for getting married.
But nouns which signify the duration of time are commonly put in the accusative case, as
Pugna
The
It is
inter
juvenem Curtium
et
Titum Sabinum
ires horas perduravit.

fight
between young Curtius and Sabine

to
Titus lasted three hours.
an error
suppose that
Roman
mills
were
mill
only water-mills and wind-mills.
The above
l3
126
mu'^t

have been rather a " winder" though, and
cost the combatants
:
must have
much pains.
few days
:
We
A
be
say also
in paucis diebus, in a
de die, by day, de nocte, by night, &c,

jest
upon the nouns of Time would, perhaps,

ill
somewhat
for
timed
we
hope, however, to have
Space
one presently.
The Space of a Place.

Tlie space of a place
is
put in the accusative,
and sometimes also

Ceesar
diligentia.
in the ablative, as
jam
mille
passus processerat,
summa
Csesar had
diligence
as a
now advanced a
mile with the greatest
not
on the top of the vehicle so named,

for saying.
young gentleman was once flogged
Qui non abest a schola centenis millibus passuum,

balatronem novi.
I
know
a blackguard
who
is
not absent a hundred
miles from the school.
" Cantare et apponere"

the
to sing
and apply,
is
maxim we would
here inculcate on our youth-
ful readers.
Every verb admits a

so that
it
genitive case of the
name
and
of a city or town in which
any thing takes place,
be of the
first
or second declension,
of the singular number,
as
Quid Romfe faciam
mentiri nescio
I
What
shall I
do at
Rome ?
know not how
to lie.
127
What a bare-faced
and bull story
the forum.
is
perversion of the truth that cock
of Curtius jumping into the hole in

credit
How the Romans managed to get

is to
from any body but the tailors
us a mystery.
These genitive cases, humi, on the ground, domi,

at
home,
militisB,
in war, belli, in war,
follow the
construction of proper names, as
Parvi sunt
foris
anna
home.
nisi est consilium
domi
Arms
are of
little
worth abroad unless there be
wisdom
Canada.
at
Cicero must have said this with a prospective eye

to
But
plural
is
if the
name
of a city or town shall be of the

it
number
only, or of the third declension,
put
in the ablative case, as
Aiunt centum portas Thebis
fuisse
They say
there were an hundred gates at Thebes.

it
You
needn't believe
unless you like.
Egregia Tibure facta videnda sunt

Fine doings are
Tlie
to
is
be seen at Tivoli.
often put after verbs sig-
name
of a place
nifying motion to a place in the accusative case
without a preposition, as
Concessi
Cantabrigiam ad
:
capiendum ingenii
man.
cultum
I
went
to
Cambridge
to
become a
fast
After
this
manner we use domus, a house, and
128

as
rus, the country,
Rus
ire
jussus sum,
I
was
rusticated.
Domum
missus eram,
was
sent home.
Going
tates, in
too fast at
Cambridge sometimes necessiair.
two senses, a dose of country

of a place
is
The name
sometimes added
to
verbs
signifying motion from a place, in the ablative case
without a proposition, as
Arbitror te Virginia veteri venisse
I
:
reckon you've come from old Virginny.
Verbs Impersonal.
Verbs impersonal have no nominative
After a tragedy
case, as
:
Scenas post tragicas multum juvat ire sub umbras

it is
very pleasant
to
go under the
Shades.
The worst
are
of
these
" Shades"
is,
that
people
in
now and then
apt to get rather " too
much
the sun" there.
These impersonals,
fert, it
interest,
it
concerns, and recases,

tua,
concerns,
are joined to
any genitive
except these ablative

sua,
nostra, vestra,
cases
feminine, mea,
and
cuja, as
Interest magistratiis tueri insulsos, animadvertere

in acres.
It
concerns the magistrate to defend the
flats
to
punish the sharps.
These genitive cases

much,
quanti, of
also, are
added,
tanti, of so
how much, magni,
of
much,

parvi, of
little,
129
soever,
quanticunque, of
how much
tantidem, of just so
much
as
Tanti refert honesta asrere
Of such consequence
is it to
do honest things.
By
this
course
of conduct,
you certainly render

;
yourself worthy of the protection of the magistrate
although whether you thereby constitute yourself a

flat or not, is
perhaps a doubtful question.

Dishonesty,
;
Much
it
may
true,
be said on both sides.
is
may
lead to being taken up
but then honesty
often leads to being taken in.
Yet honesty
is is in
is
said to be the best policy.
Policy
a branch of
the wig.
affairs.
wisdom, and " wisdom" they say "
Certain ivigs are retained at the head
of
by a good deal of policy

could adopt
perhaps the best they
fact that
throws considerable doubt
on the truth of the old maxim.

Impersonal verbs which are put acquisitively,
;
but those which are put
transitively an accusative, as
130
For
A rainistris nobis benefit We enjoy blessings from Ministers. instance No We cannot think
cantare
of
any
just at present.
Me juvat
I like to
per lunam errare, et " Isabellam''

:
wander by moonlight, and sing

love and moonlight
is
" Isabelle."
The connexion between

interesting as
it
as
is certain.
We
to
of.
shrewdly suspect
that the said planet has
more
do with the tender
passion than lovers are aAvare
But the preposition ad

these verbs
is
peculiarly atMed to
pertinet,
it
attinet, it belongs,
per-
tains, spectat, it concerns, as
Spectat ad omnes bene vivere

It
concerns
all to live
well
When they can afford it. An accusative case with

these verbs impersonal
it
a genitive
is
put after
poenitet, it repents, taedet,

it
wearies, miseret, miserescit,

it
pities, pudet,
it
shames, piget,
grieves, as
" Nihil
"
me
poenitet hujus nasi"
Trist
Shahd
My
nose has been the making of me."

passive voice
A verb impersonal of the

is to
may
it.
be ele;
gantly taken for each person of both numbers

say,
that
by
virtue of a case added to

stas,
Thus
statur is used for sto,
stat,
stamus.
'

statis, stant.
I
131
that
is,
Statur a me;
illis
:
it is
stood
by me,
stand
statur ab
it is
stood
by them,
or they
stand.
King George
is
the Fourth's statue at King's Cross
a standing joke.
Manufaetorj/
I''
132
the comic latin grammar,
The Construction of Participles.

Participles govern the cases of the verbs from
which they are derived, as

Duplices tendens ad sidera palmas,
Talia voce refert
Stretching forth his hands to heaven, he utters
such things.
This reminds us of the Italian opera.
A dative
dus, as
Sollicito
case
is
sometimes added
to participles
of the passive voice, especially
when they end
in
nasus rutilans metuendus amanti est
fiery nose is to
be feared by an anxious lover.

require a
Participles,
when they become nouns,
genitive case, as

Vectigalis appetens, lingua? profusus
:
133
Greedy
of rint, lavish of blarney.
Exosus, hating, perosus, utterly hating, perta?sus,
weary
of,
signifying actively, require an accu-
sative case, as
Philosophus exosus ad
philosopher hating
unam mulieres women in general,

:
i. e.
Malthusian.
Exosus, hated, and perosus, hated
to death, sig-
nifying passively, are read with a dative case, as
Comoedi Sanctis exosi sunt
The comedians
are hated
by
the saints.
We
will
mean
the spiritual Quixotes, or Knights of the
Rueful Countenance.
We
" calculate" that they

rail
be the greatest patrons of
roads,
con-
sidering their dislike to the stage.
Natus,
born,
prognatus,
born,
satus,
sprung,
cretus, descended, creatus, produced, ortus, risen,

editus, brought forth, require an ablative case,
and
often v/ith a preposition, as
Tafhus, bonis prognatus parentibus, cerevisiam
baud tenuem de sese existimat

beer of himself.
Taffy, sprung of good parents, thinks no small
De
Britannis Antiquis se jactat cditum
He
boasts of being descended from the Ancient
Britons.
134
Q.
like a
Why
is
the eldest son of a

?
King
of
England
Leviathan
A. Because he
is
the Prince of Wales.
The Co?<sTRrcTioN of Adverbs.
En
and ecce,
to
adverbs of shoAving, are joined

a nominative case, to an accu-
most commonly
sative case but seldom, as
En Romanus
See the
:
Roman
(q.
rum-un.)
Ecce Corinthium Modern Corinthians, we
Behold the Corinthian.

fear,
know but little Greek,
except that of the ^gidiac, or St. Giles's dialect.
En
and
ecce, adverbs
to
of upbraiding, are joined
most commonly
an accusative case only, as

!
En
togam squamosam
at his scaly toga
!
Look
Ecce caudam
Twig
his tail
,^ (S
r^^-^
'^^.A^^mf"
__
y^//////
iLD
O M ST
"
<C
E L
OC
S-U-.
U.f
NORV.i=
ON
CR'

Certain adverbs of time,
place,
135
and quantity,
admit a genitive case, as
Ubi gentium
est
Quadra Russelliana
is
Where
in the
world
Russell Square
We
must confess that
this question is exquisitely
absurd.
Nihil tunc temporis amplius

I could
quam
it is
flere
poteram
do nothing more at that time than weep.
Talking of weeping
how
odd
that an affecis
tionate wife should cry
when
her husband
trans-
ported
for life.
Satis eloquentiae, sapientiae
parum
little
Eloquence enough, wisdom

tory as practised
enough.
This quotation applies very forcibly[to domestic ora-
by small boys
for
at the instigation
of their
mamma, Those on whom
the
amusement
of
visitors.
"
little
bird with boothom wed,"
deep in the windingths ofo. whale," or " ray name is Nawval," and the like recitations are inflicted,
have "
all
satis eloquentiae"
;
conscience
pientiae
enough of eloquence, in and we cannot but think that " saparum," " wisdom little enough" is di*âll
played by
the other parties concerned. the cases of the nouns from
Some adverbs admit

Juvenis benevolus
which they are derived, as

sibi inutiliter vivit
The good-natured young man

to
lives unprofitably
himself
M 2
136
Especially

if
he have a large
circle of
female ac-
quaintance.
These adverbs of diversity

secus, otherwise
;
aliter,
otherwise, and
and these two, ante, before, and

an ablative case, as
t'other.
post, after, are often joined to
Plure
aliter.
More
Muito
Paulo
ante.
post.
Much
before.
Little behind.
before, are guilty of a great
Those who are much
waste
of time;"
make
it
and those who are

hustle.
to,
little
behind
should
up by a
or
Instar, like
of,
equal
and ergo,
for
the sake
being taken as adverbs, have a genitive case
after
them, as

Instar montis
137
equum
divina Paladis arte
-^dificant
By
This
the divine
assistance of Pallas they build a
house as big as a mountain.
may appear
incredible
yet the learned
Mun-
chausenius relates prodigies
much more
:
astonishing.
Mentitur Virgilius leporis ergo

Virgil tells lies for fun.
As may
last,
be sufficiently seen in the example before the

in the sixth
and also
book of the ^neid, passim.
The Construction of Conjunctions.

Conjunctions copulative and disjunctive, couple
like cases,
moods, and tenses, as
Socrates docuit
Xenophontem
et
et
Platonem geo:
graphiam, astronomiam,
Socrates taught
rationem globorum
Xenophon
and Plato geograpliy,
astronomy, and the use of the globes.
Q.
How may
a waterman answer the polite inare you?'" correctly, and desig-
terrogation
"'Who
nate at the same time, an educational institution.
A. By saying A-cad-am-I. The foregoing rule (not riddle)

should be otherwise, as
holds good, unless

it
the reason of a different construction requires
Emi
I
librum centussi et pluris

for
bought a book
a hundred pence, and more,
" lOOd. are 85. 4f/."
Walkinghame. M 3
138

conjunction,
The
after
quam, than,
plus, more,
is
often understood
less,
amphus, more,
and minus,
:
as
AmpUus
For
sunt sex menses
There are more than six months.

this interesting piece of information
to
we
are in-
debted
Cicero.
The author
to
whom
if
reference
has just been made, has somewhere,

not,
we
mistake
a similar observation.
In thus ushering the
Tutor's Assistant into notice,

citing a Avork of
we
feel that
which
it is
impossible to
we make
are
too
comical mention.
Thank goodness
months
in a half
there
!
are not
more than
six
year
To WHAT Moods of Verbs certain Adverbs AND Conjunctions do agree.

Ne, an, num, whether put doubtfully
nitely, are joined to a subjunctive
or indefi-
mood, as
:
Nihil refert fecerisne an persuaseris

It
matters nothing whether you have done
it
or
persuaded
to
it
as the school -master said
when he
got hold of the
wrong end of the cane.
Here
it
may
be remarked
First, that the
young
to
gentlemen who play tricks with tallow are likely

get more
whacks than they

be
like
on their
is in
fingers.
Secondly
That a master whose hand

to
Grease
in
cannot be expected
at the
same time
A-merry-key.
139
Dum,
for
dummodo,
so
that,
and quousque,
until, requires
a subjunctive mood, as
Dum
felix sis,
quid refert
What's
mood, as
the odds, so long as you're happy.
Qui, signifying the cause, requires a subjunctive
Stultus es qui Ovidio credas
You
Ut,
inodo,
for,
are a fool for believing Ovid.

after that,
sicut, as,
postquam
is
and quo;
how,
it
joined to an indicative
mood
but
when
signifies
as,
quanquam, although
final
utpote, for-
asmuch
or
the
cause, to
subjunctive
mood, as
Ut sumus
in
Ponto
ter frigore constitit Ister
Since that
we
are in Pontus the
Danube has
stood frozen three times.
Were
ments
]
skating and sliding classical accomplish-
Ambition,
to
we know,
Romans
tread on slijjpery
them struck out new paths, but
many of the many of ground none (that we have

led
:
Imagine Cato heard of) ever struck out a slide. " coming the cobbler's knock." or Seneca
Te
oro,
domine, ut exeam
sir,
I^lease,
let
me
go out.
Lastly, all words put indefinitely,

these, quis,
such as are
who, quantus, how
great, quotus,
how
many, require a subjunctive mood, as
140

Cave cui incurras, Mind who you run
inepte
:
against, stupid.
Such may have been
the speech of a
Roman cabman.
very curious specimen of the tessera, or badge,

this description of persons,
worn on the breast by
has lately been discovered at Herculaneum.
141
The construction of Prepositions.
A preposition being understood, sometimes causes

an ablative case
to
be added, as
loco avunculi
;
Habeo pigneratorem
I
z.
e.
in loco
esteem a pawnbroker in the place of an uncle

that
is,
in loco.
A
the
preposition in composition sometimes governs

it
same case which

Jupiter
also
governed out of compo-
sition, as
Olympo Vulcanum
calce exegit
Jupiter kicked Vulcan out of Olympus.
This was not only an ungentlemanly, but also an
ungodly act on Jupiter's part.

teriori,
Reasoning a pos-
one would think
it
must have been very
unpleasant to Vulcan.
Proeteriit
He
cut
me in Quadrante insalutatum me in the Quadrant.

Avith a,
Verbs compounded
ab,
de,
e,
ex,
in,
sometimes repeat the same
prepositions with their
case out of composition, and that elegantly, as
Abstinuerunt a vino
They abstained from

This properly
It
is
wine.
to the Tiber-totallers.
an allusion
should be remembered that tea
was unknown
in
Rome, except
as the accusative case of a pronoun.
In, for, erga, towards, contra, against, ad, to,
and
supra, above, requires an accusative case, as
142

Quietum
Accipit in pueros
animum mentemque benignam
He admits
kind thoughts and inclinations towards
the boys.
The master does

Nick
illustriss.
when
he gives them a half ho-
liday or a blow out.

:
Mr. Squeers (vide Nicholas
Boz.) was in the habit of making
much of the young gentlemen intrusted to his care. Sub, when it relates to time, is commonly joined
to
an accusative case, as
Sub idem tempus

tatus est
Isaaculus
time
trans maria depor-
About the
same
seas.
Ikey was
it
transported
beyond the
We say beyond the seas, lest

whether Mr.
I.
should be questioned
as a necessary or
was transported
beyond,
contingent consequence of cheating.
Super,
for, ultra,
is
put with an accusa-
tive case, for de, concerning, with an ablative case, as
Super
Proferet imperium
et
Garamantas
et
Indos
He
will
extend the empire both beyond the
Africans and the Indians.
wide rule expressed
in poetical
measure.
?
Quid de domesticis Peruviorum rebus censeas
What may
be your opinion concerning the do-
mestic economy of the Peruvians]

Tenus, as far
as,
is
143
joined to an ablative case,
both in the singular and plural number, as

Cervice, auribusque tenus Marius in luto inveniebatur
Marius was found up
to his
neck and ears

lark.
in
mud.
is
What
follows
a lark
or rather a
mud
But tenus
it
joined to a genitive only in the plural, and

its
always
case, as
:
Crurum tenus
up
to the legs.
to
Which
Ascot.
it
is
very necessary
be at
Epsom and
The Construction of Interjections.

Interjections are often put without a case, as
Spem
gregis,
ah
silice in
left
nuda connixa
reliquit
Having yeaned, she

alas!
the hope
of the flock,
upon the bare

to
flint stones.
And
exposed
the 5êe/y-hearted world, which,
as an Irishman remarked,
for tinder infancy.
least,
It
was a dangerous
to
situation
must have been,
say the
a most uncomfortable berth.

of one exclaiming,
is
O O
joined to a nominative,
accusative, and vocative case, as
lex
!
meum
Oh law Oh my O
! !
O
care
alaudas.
!
Oh
!
larks
Oh
!
Oh
is
dear
We
cannot find out what
Latin
for
oh Crikey
144
Heii
!

and proh
!
alas
are joined, sometimes to

to
a nominative,
sometimes
an accusative,
and
!
occasionally to a
vocative case, as
!
Heu
bellis
Lack-a-fZcmy.
Heu diem
!
Lack-a-<fay.
!
Proh
Oh,
Clamor
Oh
cry
Proh deos pisciculosque

!
ye gods and
little fishes
Heu
miserande puer
to
Oh, boy,
be pitied
What
boy
is
more
to
be pitied than a junior boy

in Oliver
The Fagin system described

nothing compared
to that
Twist
is
adopted in public schools.
People
effect
may
say what they will of the beneficial

it
which
produces on the minds of those who

it
are subjected to
we contend
is
that to breed a gen-
tleman's son up like a tiger
the readiest
way
to
make a beast of him. Hei and vee alas,

!
are joined to a dative case, as
Hei mihi quod
nullis
amor
est medicabilis herbis
Woe
is
me
that love is curable
by no herbs.
had smoked
Ovid never would have

a cigar or
said that, if he
chewed tobacco.
The
by
ancients beljeved
that love might be excited
certain articles taken
from the vegetable kingdom.

be considered impossible
in a similar
Why
then should
it
to allay the
same
its
feeling
manner.
Every bane has
corresfor
ponding antidote; if so, there

a philter.
may
be physic even
And
for
the pangs which a virgin has

inflicted,
145
what remedy could be prescribed more
reasonable than the Virginian
weed
besides, love
generally ends in smoke.
A CURE FOR THE HEARTACHE.
Va3 misero
capiti,
madefacto,
sa?pe
fenestras
tuae
:
Imbribus immundis, Lydia cara,
Woe
to
my
wretched head, often wetted, dear
Lydia, by the unclean showers of your window.
146

for introducing
;
This would be a proper place
a few
remarks on the ancient mode of serenading

Avê
which
are prevented from doing
by
the very imperfect
state of our present information
on
this interesting
point.
It is,
however, pretty generally admitted

took care to provide them-
that the
Romans always
selves
with an umbrella on these occasions, and
this for a reason
which the above

It
distich will
to
have
rendered sufficiently obvious.

so
appears
us that
salutary a precaution
is
well worthy of being
sometimes adopted
this hint
in these
modern days
and with
we
conclude the Syntax.
PROSODY.
All you that bards of note would be,
Must study
well your Prosody.

the sound
is
As Comparative Anatomy teaches what

of a cod-fish
is
;
so
Prosody teaches what
the
sound of syllables.
Sound and quantity mean the same thing
though
how
that fact is to be reconciled with the proverb,

little
" great cry and
wool" we do not know.

to tone
Prosody
ing,
is
divided into three parts, Tone, Breath-
and Time.
to
As
it
;
boys are usually

little
re-
quired
repeat
in
a loud one, without stam-
mering or drawling
and with as
breathing
and time, or breathing-time, as
possible.
147
We shall leave tone to

forte
tlie
consideration of pianoto doctors
and fiddle-makers
and breathing
it
and chemists, who can analyze

than
a great deal better
we
can.
In this place
we
think proper to treat
only of Time.
Now
of
Time a very
all
great deal
may
be said,
it is
taking the word in

ble of being used.
the senses in which
capa-
In the
first
place,
Time
flies
;
but
this
we have had
Time
is
occasion to observe before
as also that
very great eater.

In the second,
Time
is
a very ill-used personage
he
is
spent, wasted, lost, kicked down,
and
killed
the last as often as an Irishman is
but
for all that
he never complains.
It is
a question whether keeping Time, or losing

the essential characteristic of dancing.
Time,
is
Then we might
forelock
expatiate largely about the value
of Time, and of the propriety of taking
him by the
but for
two reasons.
that all this has been said long
it is
One
ago
;
of
them
is,
the other, that
nothing at
all to
the purpose.
We might also quote extensively

the time
from Dr. Cul;
peper's Herbal, and from Linnaeus and Jussieu
but
we speak
of,
(although
is
we hope
;
it
will
be
twigged by the reader,)

less
it
no plant
neverthe-
is
a necessary ingredient in
grammatical
stuffing.
N 2
148

in
Time
prosody
is
the measure of the pronoun-
cing of a syllable.
Like whist,
it is
divided into
Long and
Short.
:
A long time
is
marked
;
thus, as sumens, taking

pill.
short time thus
as pilula, a
A
loped
foot is the placing together of
two or more
syllables, according to
their time, the
the certain observation of
organ of which should be well deve-
for that purpose.

feet,
Ordinary feet are long

feet,
short feet,
broad
splay
feet,
club feet, and bumble feet, to which
may be added
cloven feet in the case of certain
animals, and an " old gentleman."
There are several kinds of Latin feet;

however,
dactyls.
here,
we
is
shall
only
notice
spondees
and
A
an
spondee
foot of
two
syllables, as infans,
infant.
dactyl
is
foot of three
little
syllables, as angeliis,
an angel, porciilus, a
pig.
Scanning
is
measuring a verse as you are mea-
sured by your tailor

rule.
by
the foot,
according to
To scanning
there belong the figures called
Synaloepha, Ecthlipsis Synseresis, Diaeresis, and

Caesura.
Synaloepha
is
the cutting off a vowel at the end
of a word, before another at the beginning of the
next
as

Occlusis evasi
I
ociills
149
:
nasoqiie cruento
came
off with
my
eyes bunged up and a bloody
nose.
We
have here knocked out an

heu and o are never cut
in evasi,
on the
strength of a synaloepha.
-But
off
at
least
there
are no cases on record in which this operation has
been performed.
Ecthlipsis
is
;
as often as the letter

the next
is
cut off
with
its
vowel
word beginning with a
vowel, as
Monstrum horrendum Informe ingens

vTmiis h5rtis
specta-
We
If
saw a
horrible, ugly,
great monster in the
gardens.
every bear and boar were kept

fine
in
a den
what a
world this would be.

is
Synaeresis
into one,
the
contraction
of two syllables
as in alvearia, pronounced alvaria.
Stravit
humi demens
conferta alvetiria .Juno
Mad
Juno threw the crowded beehives on the

ground.
in a
Hydrophobia occurring
of a dog
queen bee from the bite

to the faculty.
would be an interesting case

is
Diaeresis
the separation of one syllable into

for
two, as evoluisse
evolvisse.
Thus Ovid
says,
alluding probably to the
padding system adopted
by dandies and
theatrical artists.
N 3
150

Debuerant fusos evoluisse
siios
:
They ought
Caesura
is
to
have unwound
their spindles.
when
after a perfect foot (though not

is
one hke TagHoni's), a short syllable

at the end of a word, as
made
long
Pectoribiis inhians
moUes, en, deserit alas
Intent upon the
breasts
(of the fowls) lo!
he
deserts the tender wings.
Of the Kinds of Verses.

Should any one seek here
for
an account of every
all
it
kind of verse used by the Latin poets,

say
is
we
can
we
to
wish he
may
get
it.
As
it
behoveth
no one
us
to
be wiser than the law. so
behoveth not
be wiser than the Eton Grammar.

are
The verses which boys
commonly taught
feet.
to
make
are hexameters and pentameters.
An
hexameter verse consists of six
As
the
is
ancient heroes were at least six feet high, this
probably the reason Avhy

A-erse.
it
is also called an heroic
The
fifth
foot in this
kind of verse should be a

;
dactyl, the sixth a spondee

either dactyls or spondees
;
the other feet
may be
as
:
ObstantI pluvils venit
cum tegmine Sambo
Sambo came with

The
fifth foot
his Macintosh.
also is
sometimes a spondee, as

Claviger Alcldes,
151
magnum
Jovis incrementum.
Hercules, king of clubs, great offspring of Jupiter.
The
last syllable of
affair.
every verse
is
common
An
elegiac, lack-a-daisical, or pentameter verse,
consists of four feet
and two long
syllables, one
of
Avhich is placed
between the second and
third foot,
and the other at the end of the verse.

first
The two
;
feet
may
be dactyls, spondees, or both
the
two
last are
always dactyls, as
:
Res est infellx, plenaque fraudis amor Love is an unlucky affair, and full of humbug.
We
feel
compelled, notwithstanding what has been
before said, to
make
a few additions to what
is
contained in the Eton

verses.
Grammar
with respect to
The rhyt-hm
by
ciple of the
of Latin verses
may
be easily learned
practising (out of school), exercises on the prin-
examples following
Diim
didle, dl diim, diiin diim, deedledy, dcedle
de, diim
dum
Diim
N. B.
didle, dfim
dum,
de, deedledy, deedledy,
diim.
The
following familiar piece
of poetry
would not have been admitted

readings of
into the
Comic
various
Latin Grammar, but that there being

it,
many
we wished
to transmit the right
one
to posterity.
152
Patres conscripti
lippi.
took
a boat and went to Phi-
Trumpeter unus erat qui coatum
scarlet habebat,
Stormum surgebat, et boatum overset ebat, Omnes drownerunt, quia swimaway non potuerunt,
Excipe John Periwig

pig-
tied
up
to the tail of
a dead
Here,
also,
this poetical curiosity
may
perhaps
be properly introduced.
Conturbabantur Constantinopolitani,
Innumerabilibus solhcitudinibus.
Of the Quantity of the

There
is
first Syllable.
in
in
a river in
mouth
in like
Macedon and a river manner there are positions
Mondanc-
ing and positions in Prosody.
The following vowels are long by

1.
position.
vowel before two consonants, or before a
double consonant in the same word

fat,
as
pinguis,
Ingens,
great Ajax, the
name
of a hero.
2. vowel coming before one consonant at the end of a word, and another at the beginning of the
next, as
Major sum quam
cui possit tua virga nocere

is
I'm a bigger boy than your rod
able to hurt.
sit,
The
by
syllables jor,
sum, quam, and
are long
position.

3.
153
Sometimes, but seldom, a short vowel at the

at the
end of a word placed before two consonants

beginning of the next; as
Occulta spolia hi Croceo de Colle ferebant
These persons brought the secret

fron Hill.
spoils
from Saf-
A sliort vowel
is
before a mute, a liquid following,
rendered common, as in the word patris.
Sunt quibus ornatur Jenkins femoralia patris
The breeches
that Jenkins is rigged out in
are
his father's.
A vowel
thy,
before another
is
always
short,
as tua,
memoria, memory.
Except the genitive cases of pronouns in ius, where the i is a common i, although alterius has
always a short
i
and
alius a long
i.
Except, likewise, those genitive and dative cases

of the
fifth
declension
is
where the vowel
e,
like
Punch's nose,
faciei, of
made long between two
i 's,
as
a face.
154

also in fio is long, except e
The syllable^
r
and
follow together, as fierem, fieri.
Fient quae " Fieri Facias" mandata vocantur
The writ which

made.
Fi, fa. is
is
called " Fieri Facias" will be
a legal instrument that deprives a poor
man
of his mattress that a rich one
may
lounge on
his ottoman,
Ca. Sa.
is
a similar benevolent con-
trivance for punishing misfortune as felony.
Dius, heavenly,
has
the
first
syllable long
interjection
Diana,
common
and so has the
Ohe
Thus
there's a common medium Between a goddess and an interjection. A vowel before another in Greek words
of connexion,
is
some-
times long, as
Caerula, Plerides, sunt vobis tegmina
crurum
Oh, Muses, your stockings are blue.

Also
in
Greek
possessives,
fuit,
as
:
Somniculosa
pinguisque Êneia nutrix

fat.
^neas's nurse was sleepy and
^neas
has often enough been represented in arms.
In Latin mark, that every dipthong

'S as long as
any stage-coach whip-thong;

it
Except before a vowel
goes,
When
Words
same
'tis
as short as Elsler's clothes.
derived from others are tarred with the

is,
stick, that
are assigned the
same quantity
with some
as those which they are derived from,
155
few exceptions, which we must trouble the student

to fish for.
Compounds
to
follow the quantity of their simple

legis,
words, as from lego

read through.
to read,
comes perlego,
By
the way, reading does not always induce

;
reading through
though we hope
it
may
in the
case of the C. L. G.
If to a preterperfect tense belong
Two only syllables, As veni, vidi, vici, Which Csesar made
the
first is
long
speech so
cool.
to illustrate our rule;
To which we need not cite exceptions small. Look in your Gradus and you'll find them all.
Consult also the Eton Grammar, and works of
the
poets, passim,
to the
as well
for
exceptions
:
to the
above as
1.
two following rules
Words
that double the first syllable of the pre-
terperfect tense
have the
first
syllabic short
as
cecidi from cado, &c.
Fortis Higinbottom cecidit terramque momordit
Brave Higinbottom
2.
fell
and
bit the ground.

first
supine of two syllables has the
syllable
long
As visum latum lotum motum And many more if we could quote

:
'em.
156
Of the Quantity of the last Syllable.
We have had a poetical

us
for
some time
fit
gradually growing upon
'tis
of no use to resist
so here
goes
Oh
Muse, thine aid
afford to
me,
Inspire
my
Ideality
Thou who,
benign, in days of yore.
Didst heavenly inspiration pour
On
him,
who
to
luckily for us
;
Sang Propria Quae Maribus

Teach me
Prosodial strains in notes of
sound on quiv'ring
fire
lyre,
;
Words' ends
shall be
my theme
sublime,
Now
first
descanted on in rhyme.
little
Come,
boys, attention lend.

:
All words are long in a that end

(In proof of which
I'll
bet a quart,)
Excepting those which must be short
As
Or
puta,
ita,
postea, quia,
;
Eja, and every case in ia

a,
save such as
we must
class
With Grecian vocatives in as, And ablatives of first declension Besides the aforesaid, we may mention
Nouns numeral that end in ginta, Which common, as a bit of flint are.
Some
terminate in
;
h,
d,t\
All these are short
but those in c
157
Form
toes
As
long
mean, form ends of as long as Oxford

I
feet
Street.
Though nee and donee every bard Hath written short as Hanway yard,
Fac,
hie,
and hoc are common, though

is
Th' ablative hoe
long you know.
Now
Like
to
" e finita" short are reckon'd,
a jiffey or a second,
Though we must call the Gradus wrong, Or these, of fifth declension, long.
As
In
also particles that
come
mode derivative therefrom. Long second persons singular Of second conjugation are.
And
monosyllables in
for
too,
e.
Take,
example, me,
te, se,
Then,
adverbial adjectives
Are long
as rich old women's lives
If from the second declination
Of adjectives
they've derivation
Pulchre and docte, are the kind
Of adverbs that I have in mind. Ferme is long, and fere also

Bene, and male, not at
Lastly,
Is
all so.
each
all
final eta
Greek,
long on
wit
days of the week
To
(for thus
we
render nempe)
Lethe, Anchise, cete, Tempe.
158
THI2
COMIC LATIN GRAMMAR.
Those words as long we classify
Which
end, like egotists, in

mihi, tibi, sibi
so are ubi, ibi
short,
;
i,
Rememb'ring
Are common,
Nis!
is
always
and quasi's
Short
In
i
also, so are certain cases
Greek vocatives and datives

least if
(At
we may
trust the natives
,)
Making
their genitives in os,
For instance
Phyllis, Phyllidos.
(A name oft utter'd with a sigh,) Whereof the dative ends in i. Words in / ending short are all,
Save
nil for nihil,
sal,
and
sol.
And some
To
In,
cite
;
few Hebrew words t'were well
as Michael, Raphael.
n's are long,
Your
save forsitan
tamen attamen, and an

forsan,
Veruntamen and
which
Are
short as
any
tailor's stitch;
These, therefore,
we
1
except, and then
Contractions " per apocopen"
As
viden'
men'
and audin
so in
Exin' and subin', dein', proi'n.
An, from a nominative Ending a word

is
in
short,
they say.
But every an
for long
must pass
in as.
Derived from nominative

Nouns,
too, in
159
en are short whose
finis
Doth
in the genitive
make
inis.
And
so are n's that do delight in
An
i and y Alexin, Ttyn. Greek words are short I'd have you know,
That end
in
on with
little o,
Common
are terminating
o's.
Cases oblique except from those,

Adverbial adjectives as falso
Are
long,
take
tanto,
quanto
also
Save mutuo,
sedulo, and crebro,
Common as vestment vending Hebrew. Modo and quomodo among

Short
o's
we rank
nor
;
to
be long.
Nor
cito, ego,
duo
no nor
;
Ambo
and
Homo
long.
ever prone are

in o.
But monosyllables
Are counted
Example
to
to
sto.
And
omega, the whole world over,

'tis
'S as long as
If r should
from here
Dover.
chance a word
wind up,
'Tis short in general,
make your mind up

vir,
But
far, lar, nar,
and
and fur
ciir.
Par, compar, impar, dispar,
As long must needs be cited here. With words from Greek that end in
Though 'mong
These two exempted
er
the Latins from this fate are
pater, mater
160

final er
Short in the
we
state
em,
Namely,
" auctoritate vatum."

s,
Now,
the Eton
Ends words
in just as
Grammar says. many ways

five
As
there are vowels
as thus
In order, as,
es, is, os, us.
As, in a general
way appears
Long unto
all
but asses ears.
But some Greek words take care to mark as Short, for example Pallas, Areas
And
nouns increasing plural sport
An
as accusative that's short,

in the main's a long
aflfair,
Es
Anchises, such, and patres are.
Though
of the third declension
you
As
short such substantives
must view,
The
genitives of which increase,

es,
Derived from nominatives in
And have an
The
accent short upon
syllable that's last but one.
As
miles, seges, dives, (which
Means what
But pes
Like
to
is
a Poet
is n't,)
rich
long, with bipes, tripes,
a hermit munching dry pease.
To
these add Ceres, Saturn's cub,

of a goddess,
(Name
The
and
for
grub
figure
Metonymy
through,)
And
aries, abies, paries, too.
161
Sum
Are
with
its
compounds forming
es,
short, join penes, if
you
please,
Item Cyclopes Naiades.
1
plural neuters.
Greek nominatives and

For
lists
of which consult your tutors.

call short, as Paris, tristis,
Is,
we
all
Save
such words as mensis,

is,
istis.
Plurals oblique that end in
Adding
thereto for quibus quis.
The
is in
Samnis long by
its genitive's
right is
Because
Samnltis.
Where you
observe a lengthened state
Of syllable penultimate. The same to all such words
applies,
eis,
And
Is
contracted,
meaning
Long too, and pray remember this Are monosyllables in is. Save is the nominative pronoun,
And
quis,
and
bis,
which
is
last is
no noun.
When
But
verbs by
concluded are.
;
In second person singular

in the plural His
is is long,
make,
The
and no mistake
Provided always that the peNultimatc plural long shall be.

Os, saving compos, impos, os
Is long
as honos dominos.
162

's
The Greek omicron
short,
and that
in
All conscience must be so in Latin.
Words
should be short in us,
unless
Authority has laid a stress
On the penultimate of any Word that increases in the

Tive case
geni-
when
us
is
long, the
same
Pronunciation nouns
may
claim
Declined like gradiis or like manus
Though here exceptions
still
detain us.
The
first
case and the

;
fifth
are those
Singular
short as
monkey's nose.
and
iis,
Long
are mus,
criis,
thiis
and
siis
All monosyllables in
And
Grecian nouns by diphthong ous,
Translated us by
Lastly,
all
men
in
o^nous.
words
u are
long,
And
so
we end
our classic song.
And not our song only, but our work

of our solitude
the companion
the object
for
of our cares
for
which
alone
oil
;
we
live,
which we consumed our midnight

that,
and not only
but also burnt a great deal of

say,
is
daylight.
it is
Our work, we
it
ended
and such as
we commit
iii,
to the world.
Horace says Carm.
Lib.
Ode
XXX.
(an ode which
association of ideas, is always connected in our
by some strange mind

ale,)
with the visionary image of a jug of
" Exegi
163
monumentum sereperennius," I have perfected a work more durable than brass. Whether our production
is
characterized by the durability of that metal or
not, is a question
which we leave
to the decision of
posterity
we
cannot, however, help thinking that,

it
considering the boldness of our attempt,

figuratively at least, something in
possesses
the
common with
fain
substance
in
question
and
we would
hope
"
that that something does not consist in hardness.
And now
many
farewell to the reader
word that must be and hath been'' times when once would have been quite
a said a great
farewell,
sufficient.
We
need
not, therefore,
repeat
it
nor
need we say how much we hope that we have
amused, instructed him, and so
forth
that being as
much an understood thing to put at book, as " Love to papa, mamma,

sisters," in
the end of a
brothers and
a holiday
letter.
Nothing, then, remains

kick up our hat and cry
for
us
now
to do,
but
to
" ALL OVER."
FINIS
LIST OF ETCHINGS.
1
Vocative case (schoolmaster spatting a boy)
to face
page
' "'
'
2.
2.
'^.
Schoolmaster beating a drum , and boys singing in chr ''
Ingenuas pugni didicisse
fideliter artes (fight)
4.
Prometheus Vinctus (vagabond
in the stocks)
72
74
135 144
5. 6. 7.
8.
SmeUirig a Pig (boys at supper in the bed room)
Domestic Oratory (small boy spouting in a chair)
Heu miserande Puer (boy

Patres conscripti
tossed in a blanket).
152
COE, PRINTER, 27, OLD CHANGE, ST. rAi/i
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Rev. B, C. Scadding, D.D.

anD facetious llnttoOucttou

WITH NUMEROUS ILLUSTRATIONS.

THE SECOND EDITION.

work cannot allow a second

of apology, he being desirous of

imitating, in every respect, the

begs that so much as the consciousness of

a great deal of nonsense, usu-

hope of disarming have been said

as possible for this

and prevailed upon by the importunity

of his friends, he has allowed a portrait of himself,

that eminent artist,

Mr. John Leech,

for the sale of the book, to

facing the title-page, to the public.

Here again he has been

Avith the requisitions of

custom, and the

disinclination to appear odd, whimsical, or peculiar.

requires that he should speak

he fears by too partial

has been executed, that of investing with an ideal

observe in heroic poetry, painting,

and sculpture, the soul

justness of the metaphorical

in the delineation of the head,

not for the author to speak

ness and delicacy, his sense

too strong for expres-

habitual pensiveness of the

eyebrows, mingled with the momentary gaiety of

one of the most suc-

though there are certain

obligation to the talented

very favourable impression which,

without prejudice to truth, has been given

ease so conspicuous in the

and the thought so

remarkable in the treatment of the trousers,

Too great praise cannot be bestowed on the

quite sensible that both him-

and the maker

a degree of neatness, elegance, and spirit

the tie of the cravat, to which he has in reality

never yet been able

displayed in furnishing him with so handsome a

concern, that the hint thus bestowed will not be lost

the large oaken cudgel

which he has hitherto been

respect, to the present generation,

book, says an old proverb,

and a great preface, says a

our intention to expatiate

largely on the present occasion

long discourse prefixed to a small volume,

forty-eight pounder at the door of a pig- stye.

should as soon think of erecting the Nelson

should hasten at once into the midst of

instead of trespassing on the patience of

our readers, and possibly,

Avith their time.