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The Four Archetypes of the Mature Masculine: The King

Posted By Brett On January 17, 2012 @ 6:14 pm In A Man's Life,On Manhood | 31 Comments <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-22326" title="king2" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2012/01/king2.jpg" alt="" width="326" height="550" /> This is the sixth and final part of a series on the archetypes of mature masculinity based on the book King, Warrior, Magician, Lover [1] by Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette. If you havent already, I highly recommend reading the introduction to the series [2] first. Also, keep in mind that these posts are a little more esoteric than our normal fare, and are meant to be contemplated and thoughtfully reflected upon. The King archetype is the most important of the four mature masculine archetypes. Just as a good king in mythological stories is often something of a Renaissance mana good warrior, magician, and loverthe King archetype incorporates the other three mature masculine archetypes in perfect harmony. A man who accesses the King archetype in its fullness will also have accessed the Warrior, Magician, and Lover archetypes. For this reason, the King archetype is typically the last of the mature masculine archetypes to power up in a mans life. In this way, it is truly the crown of the other archetypes, the energy that gives a man a sense of his full, godlike potential.

The Characteristics of the King in His Fullness

He is centered. Throughout history, cultures have often placed the king at the center of the universe. From him radiated all of existence. If you look at how ancient civilizations laid out their cities, we often see that the dwelling place of the king or leader sat at the center. In addition to serving as the geographic center of his realm, the ancient king also represented its spiritual center as well. He was the intermediary between heaven and earth. Through his divine powers, the king brought order to the universe by reconciling opposite forces. Myths

abound of kings battling evil demonic creatures and establishing order in chaos. When a man is living the King archetype in its fullness, he feels that same centering power within himself. Not that he believes the world revolves around him, but rather that his confidence, purpose, and well-being give him a supreme sense of balance. Even when the world around him becomes chaotic, he remains cool, calm, and collected. He acts, rather than reacts. Hes the rock in crisis [3]. A man fully engaged with positive King energy is completely present as a man [4]. Because of his position at the center of things, he can survey everything that is going on, soak it all in, and then take a broad view of things. This overarching perspective allows him to remain immovable in the face of the passing and superficial. He is decisive. <img class="aligncenter" title="solomon" src="http://content.artofmanliness.com/uploads// 2012/01/solomon1.jpg" alt="" width="440" height="316" /> The King is the executive of the other archetypes, and as such, is charged with making decisions. His ability to be decisive is rooted in two things. First, who he is and what he stands for; the Kings core values are centered on firm and unchanging principles. So when a crisis comes, he does not waver because he has already determined the course he will take. Secondly, the King seasons his decisions with experience. His experiences provide him with practical wisdom [5]: the knowledge of how to do the right thing, at the right time, for the right reasons. He lives with integrity. The word integrity is related to the roots of words like integrate and entire. In Spanish it is rendered integro, meaning whole. Integrity thus implies the state of being complete, undivided, intact, and unbroken. Integrity is really the bond that holds a mans other virtues together; it is the mark of a man who has successfully integrated all good principles. His life is a unified whole. The King has not only integrated all the other archetypes, but seeks this wholeness in other areas of his life as well. He mends broken relationships, keeps his word, acts with honesty, and takes responsibility for his actions. He is who he says he is; he doesnt have one set of principles for Sundays and one for the rest of the week. He protects his realm.

<img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-22328" title="bull" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2012/01/bull.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="288" / > Historically, one of the kings primary functions was to protect his dominion. When enemy forces encroached on his territory, a king would act with wrathful aggressiveness. Even today, we look to our leaders as protectors. The President of the United States is the Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces, charged with the responsibility of protecting our nations security. While a man might not be a leader of a country, he certainly has his own realms hes responsible for protectingwhether that protection be physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual. If youre married with children, your home is a realm, a place you want to make a refuge from negative influences. The department youre responsible for at work is another sphere where you work to protect your employees from in-fighting, mediocrity, and layoffs. And your own psyche and personal boundaries are sovereignties that you must protect and defend with zeal. Whatever your realms may be, when youre accessing the King archetype in its fullness, you do what you have to in order to protect them, and this often requires accessing the aggressiveness of the Warrior archetype [6]. He provides order. <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-22337" title="solon" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2012/01/solon1.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="338" /> Throughout history, Kings have been lawgivers. The first, and perhaps most famous of these king/lawgivers was the ancient Babylonian king, Hammurabi. His code represents one of historys first written sets of laws. These laws touched on all areas of life for ancient Mesopotamians, including trade, religion, and military service. Other famous king/lawgivers include Solon of ancient Athens, Lycurgus of ancient Sparta, and Moses (while technically not a king, Moses was a leader of the ancient Hebrews). Just as these ancient kings provided order to their respective societies, so too does a man accessing the King archetype establish order in his own life and in the lives of those around him. We see the King manifest itself in us when we establish rules, guidelines, and principles for others to follow. A man accessing positive King energy doesnt create rules just so he can reap the satisfaction of watching people obey him. Rather, his rules provide the structure that allows other people to flourish. Figuring out how to create

rules that help instead of hinder peoples progress requires the kind of thoughtful reflection that comes from accessing the Magician archetype.

[7]

To completely integrate the King archetype into our lives, it isnt enough to tell others how they should live; a man must also live by those same edicts himself. Before we can provide order for others, we ourselves must become men of discipline. As General George S. Patton told his son [8]: Soldiers, all men in fact, are natural hero worshipers. Officers with a flare for command realize this and emphasize in their conduct, dress and deportment the qualities they seek to produce in their men. When I was a second lieutenant I had a captain who was very sloppy and usually late yet he got after the men for just those faults; he was a failure. He creates and inspires creativity in others. According to Moore, mythological kings were often associated with fertility and creation. Many ancient cultures believed that their kings ability to procreate determined the fate of their crops. If the king was lusty, virile, and siring numerous progeny, the harvest would be bountiful. But we dont have to father an entire football team in order to access the King archetype. Whenever we take part in any act of creation, whether it be writing a song, starting a business, or yes, becoming a dad, the King archetype is manifesting itself in our lives. To fully integrate the King in our lives, however, we must inspire creativity in others as well. A man who is accessing the King archetype understands that his power and influence in the world increases as he empowers others to live to their fullest potential. He blesses the lives of others. <img class="aligncenter" title="isaac" src="http://content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2012/01/ isaac.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="323" /> The good king delighted in noticing and promoting good men to positions of responsibility in his kingdom. He held audience, primarily, not to be seen, but to see, admire, and delight in his subjects, to reward them and to bestow honors upon them. Moore, KWML One of the functions of ancient kings was to bless those whom they led. As intermediaries between the gods and earth, the king had the power to bless his people so that they might prosper. In the Bible, we can read several

accounts of the great patriarchs leaving a fathers blessing on their posterity before dying. We often associate blessing with a religious act. While a man certainly accesses the King archetype by giving a fathers blessing to his children, just like Jacob and Isaac did, he can also bless others around him in other ways that arent necessarily religious. Simply recognizing and honoring others for their achievements is a way we can bless others. As we get older, I think we take for granted the power that a kind word can have on a young persons life. But think back on your own experience. Remember when you were a young man? How did you feel when an older person, especially a man you admired, gave you a compliment or went out of his way to recognize an achievement? If you were like me, it made you feel awesome. You might have stuck out your chest a bit more or walked with a spring in your step. You probably still remember exactly what they said to you. Thats the power of blessing in action. It uplifts and edifies others. We can also bless others by becoming a mentor. Weve talked about the importance of mentorship on the site many times before, but one of the reasons so many young men are struggling today is because they lack positive mentoring from older men. Moore argues that: Young men today are starving for blessing from older men, starving for blessing from the King energy. This is why they cannot, as we say, get it together. They shouldnt have to. They need to be blessed. They need to be seen by the King, because if they are, something inside will come together for them. That is the effect of blessing; it heals and makes whole. Thats what happens when we are seen and valued and concretely rewarded for our legitimate talents and abilities. As we grow older, wiser, and more in touch with the King archetype, it is our responsibility as men to bless and assist younger men on their path to mature masculinity. He leaves a legacy. <img class="aligncenter wp-image-22338" title="tr" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2012/01/tr3.jpg" alt="" width="409" height="409" / > Kings throughout history were obsessed with legacy. In creating empires, building edifices, writing laws, and changing the culture, they sought to

become immortal and to leave behind something that would remind subsequent generations of their lives and their greatness. No matter the size of your principality, the desire to leave a legacy is a switch of manliness that cannot be ignored. Happily, creating a legacy need not involve the construction of great pyramids, but can come from any idea, business, tradition, relationship, or thoughtanything that changes a person, the world, just a little and gets passed on, anything that lasts. <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-22348" title="kingarch2" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2012/01/kingarch2.jpg" alt="" width="249" height="375" / >

The Shadows of the King Archetype

The Tyrant Unlike the King archetype which creates and blesses others, the Tyrant seeks to destroy and tear down. Plagued by narcissism, he really does think that he sits at the center of the universe. The Tyrant wrongly believes that power is finite; he has a scarcity mentality. He doesnt understand the truththat power and influence actually increase the more you share it with others. Thus the burden of maintaining his fragile illusion of absolute power makes him very insecure; any threat to his authority and supremacy enrages him and causes him to lash out with abusephysically, emotionally, or mentally. When the Tyrant isnt viewing others as a threat and putting them in their place, he sees them as objects to exploit for his own gain; he is willing to push his friends, family, and employees under the bus in order to further his goals. We see the Tyrant manifest itself in this manner when businessmen or politicians further their own career at the expense of the people under their stewardship. The Weakling The Weakling is the passive shadow of the King archetype. Instead of taking control of his life and resolutely making decisions, a man possessed by the Weakling often abdicates his throne to others, handing over power, responsibility, and control of his life to them. This is the man who, though grown up, still lets his mother or father make his decisions for him. This is the man who kowtows to his boss or his wifes every whim. This is also the man who was abused in some way as a child, and when he becomes an adult and ascends into a position of power, relishes the

opportunity to turn the tables and become the bully himself. Now that Im in charge, things are going to change around here! But even in a position of power, the Weaklings insecurity gets the best of him; he becomes paranoid that people are out to get himand they often are because hes such a jerk. This paranoia leads him to become even more controlling and cruel. Moore believes that the Weakling and Tyrant shadows work in tandem with each other. Its very rare that a man is ruled by one and not the other. Underneath every blustering Tyrant is a scared Weakling. And underneath every cowering Weakling is a Tyrant waiting to explode.

How to Access the King Archetype

The King seeks to integrate all the other archetypes and all good principles in order to reach his full potentialso that he may use this energy for a higher purpose and to bless the lives of others. Create more, consume less [9] Leave a legacy [10] Develop practical wisdom [5] Become a mentor [11] Find a mentor [12] Establish your core values [13] Develop the virtue of order [14] Break away from your mother [15] Develop a life plan [16] Develop the traits of true leadership [17] Protect the sanctity of your ideas [18] Become decisive [19] Avoid the corruption of money [20], power Live with integrity [23]

[21]

,and sex

[22]

Series Conclusion
This concludes our series on the archetypes of the mature masculine. I hope you got something out of the articles. So how much credence and focus should you give to these archetypes? Well obviously their existence cannot be provenonly speculated about. And I do believe that the main focus of a mans life should be on practical ways to take action. But pondering the more esoteric stuff is what guides you in determining what those actions should be. These archetypes represent one waya very helpful wayof organizing those meditations and can lead you to

a more productive exploration of who you are and what kind of man you want to become.

Article printed from The Art of Manliness: http://artofmanliness.com URL to article: http://artofmanliness.com/2012/01/17/the-fourarchetypes-of-the-mature-masculine-the-king/ URLs in this post: [1] King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: http://www.amazon.com/gp/ product/0062506064/ref=as_li_ss_tl? ie=UTF8&tag=stucosuccess-20&linkCode=as2&camp=217145&creat ive=399369&creativeASIN=0062506064 [2] reading the introduction to the series: http://artofmanliness.com../ 2011/10/23/2011/10/04/2011/09/13/2011/07/31/king-warriormagician-lover-introduction/ [3] Hes the rock in crisis: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/09/27/ being-the-rock/ [4] completely present as a man: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2010/11/22/being-fully-present-as-a-man/ [5] practical wisdom: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/12/19/ practical-wisdom/ [6] the Warrior archetype: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/10/23/ the-four-archetypes-of-the-mature-masculine-the-warrior/ [7] accessing the Magician archetype.: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2011/11/28/the-four-archetypes-of-the-mature-masculine-themagician/ [8] General George S. Patton told his son: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2011/08/21/manvotional-a-letter-from-general-george-s-pattonto-his-son/ [9] Create more, consume less: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2010/04/06/modern-maturity-create-more-consume-less/ [10] Leave a legacy: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/06/13/the-5switches-of-manliness-legacy/ [11] Become a mentor: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/02/15/ mentors-for-men/ [12] Find a mentor: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/06/02/30days-to-a-better-man-day-3-find-a-mentor/

[13] Establish your core values: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/05/31/30-days-to-a-better-man-day-1-define-your-corevalues/ [14] Develop the virtue of order: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2008/03/17/the-virtuous-life-order-become-a-master-of-theuniverse/ [15] Break away from your mother: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2011/01/12/blow-up-your-relationship-with-your-mother-and-getone-step-closer-to-being-the-man-you-want-to-be/ [16] Develop a life plan: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/02/08/ create-a-life-plan/ [17] Develop the traits of true leadership: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2008/08/17/5-traits-of-true-leadership/ [18] Protect the sanctity of your ideas: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/01/11/being-your-own-man/ [19] Become decisive: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/08/09/beingdecisive/ [20] money: http://artofmanliness.com/2008/08/26/3-man-killersmoney/ [21] power: http://artofmanliness.com/2008/09/09/3-man-killerspower/ [22] sex: http://artofmanliness.com/2008/10/07/3-man-killerssex/ [23] Live with integrity: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/04/07/ living-a-life-of-integrity/ Click here to print. Copyright 2010 The Art of Manliness. All rights reserved. - The Art of Manliness - http://artofmanliness.com -

The Four Archetypes of the Mature Masculine: The Warrior

Posted By Brett & Kate McKay On October 23, 2011 @ 11:52 pm In A Man's Life,On Manhood | 56 Comments <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-20872" title="spar" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/10/spar.jpg" alt="" width="497" height="264" />

This is the fourth part of a series on the archetypes of mature masculinity based on the book King, Warrior, Magician, Lover [1] by Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette. If you havent already, I highly recommend reading the introduction to the series [2] first. Also, keep in mind that these posts are a little more esoteric than our normal fare, and are meant to be contemplated and thoughtfully reflected upon. Every great civilization has a great warrior tradition and accompanying warrior myths. The Old Testament recounts the stories of a warrior people and a warrior God. In the ancient Mediterranean, the Spartans had perhaps the most legendary warrior tradition. From birth, Spartan society nurtured and trained their boys to become warriors, and that rigorous training created men like Leonidas and his 300 men of unconquerable spirit. Japan had their fearless samurai warriors whose undaunted courage came from living life as if they were already dead. Today the Warrior archetype lives on in our reverence for those who serve in the armed forces and in modern books and movies. William Wallace from Braveheart and General Maximus from Gladiator embody the Warrior archetype. But in general, modern culture is not comfortable with Warrior energy. The advent of mechanized warfare during the first half of the 20th century dampened the romantic ideal of martial courage. Since the social and cultural revolutions of the 60s and 70s, weve generally taught boys and men to avoid confrontation and conflict and to instead nurture their feminine side. The result is the Nice Guy; the man who will avoid confrontation and aggression even when confrontation and aggression are justified. Society pushes men to be sweet and sensitive, because they fear them becoming coldly stoic, abusive, and destructively angry. But societys perception of the Warrior archetype is not based on the Warrior energy in its full, healthy manifestation, but on the archetypes shadows. The problem is not Warrior energy itself, but Warrior energy that is not used in harmony with the other masculine archetypes and directed by empathy, contemplation, and order. Fighting itself is not bad, the question is simply: What is a man fighting for? The Warriors energy is needed not only in times of war, but on all the battlefields of life. Properly tapping into the Warriors energy provides a man with an unsurpassable power source which will fuel him to reach his goals, fight for worthy causes, achieve greatness, and leave a lasting legacy.

<img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-20871" title="warrior2" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/10/warrior2.jpg" alt="" width="494" height="360" />

The Warrior in His Fullness

Moore says that The characteristics of the Warrior in his fullness amount to a total way of life, what the samurai called a do (pronounced do). These characteristics constitute the Warrior Dharma, Maat, or Tao, a spiritual or psychological path through life. What are these characteristics? Lets take a look. Note: While here we use the language of the martial warrior, the characteristics can be applied to any mans life mission, whether civilian or true solider. Aggressive If you look up the word aggressive in the dictionary, these are the definitions youll find: 1. characterized by or tending toward unprovoked offensives, attacks, invasions, or the like; militantly forward or menacing 2. making an all-out effort to win or succeed; competitive 3. vigorously energetic, especially in the use of initiative and forcefulness Of the three definitions, the first is most popular in modern culture. Something unprovoked, out of line. Notice how often overly precedes aggressive in common parlance. Aggression may also bring to mind military policies a person does not agree with. In general it has a negative connotation. But true aggression should be thought of in the context of the second two dictionary entries. Effort. Energy. Initiative. Force. Aggression is a neutral tool that can be harnessed for either ill or good. How it is channeled makes all the difference. A man who does not harness his aggression at all picks a fight with everyone and about everything; his relationships fail and he is stunted in his personal development. The man who reins in his aggression too much becomes the stereotypical weenie Nice Guyproper aggression turns into passive aggression. He is too polite to go after what he wants, and hes seething inside because of it. A man who has successfully integrated the Warrior archetype harnesses his aggression as the force that pushes him to compete to be the best and moves him ever forward towards his goals.

Purpose Of course that proper use of aggression presupposes that a man has goals that hes striving towards in the first place. A man has to have a clear and definite purpose in life, or he will feel lost and restless, like he is drifting along instead of marching ahead. Mindful The mindfulness of the Warrior is two-fold. First, he is always alert and awake, ever vigilant. He has keen situational awareness. He never lets complacency lull him to sleep; instead, he is always watching, observing, studying, and planning. Secondly, the Warrior is mindful of the finiteness of life and the inevitably of death, and he purposefully contemplates that death. His courage is rooted in the fact that he is not afraid to die. Lifes shortness brings clarity to his mind. He knows that any minute could be his last so he makes every day and decision count. Carpe diem! becomes his battle cry. Adaptable During the Revolutionary War, the Continental Army knew that it could not match the man and fire power of the British. So instead of facing them down on a field for a traditional battle, the minutemen took to the woods and launched surprise hit and run attacks on the enemy. This is the way of the Warrior; he is a guerrilla fighter. When hes up against great odds, he bucks convention and uses his cleverness and his strategic intelligence to find creative ways to turn the tide in his favor. He is an efficient fighterhe studies the weaknesses of his opponents and concentrates his strikes there. He is flexible and able to respond to change by shifting tactics on the fly. Minimalist The key to successful guerrilla warfare is the fighters ability to travel light. While the traditional force has power in its superior resources, those resources also weigh and slow them down. The guerrilla fighter strips away all superfluities and excess baggage; he carries only what he needs and is thus quick and nimble, able to be two steps ahead of the enemy. Decisive In times of peace or crisis, whether for big things or small, the Warrior is able to boldly make decisions. He doesnt stand there shilly-shally, wondering what he should do, scared of choosing the wrong option. He is calm and cool under pressure. Once he makes a decision, he unhesitatingly

moves on it because he does not live in regret. The Warrior is able to be so decisive because he trains so thoroughly for these moments; he is prepared. He thinks about all possible contingencies and what he would do in each situation before the crisis arrives. When the crisis does come, his mind and body already instinctively know what to do. Skillful Part of the Warriors confidence in his decisions is rooted in his supreme competence. Accordingly to Moore, The Warriors energy is concerned with skill, power, and accuracy. The Warrior has absolute mastery of the technology of his tradethe technology that enables him to reach his goal. He has developed skill with the weapons he uses to implement his decisions. Loyal If you remember, the Hero is the boyhood archetype [3] which matures into the Warrior archetype. Part of this maturation process centers on a shift in a mans loyalties. Moore argues that The Heros loyaltyis really to himselfto impressing himself with himself and to impressing others. The Warriors loyalties, on the other hand, are to something beyond and other than himself and his own concerns. The Warriors loyalty centers on a cause, a god, a people, a task, a nationlarger than individuals. The Warrior has a central commitment around which he organizes his life. His lifes purpose is rooted in ideals and principles, which naturally strips away superfluities and pettiness and brings his life great meaning. Disciplined The Warrior has mastered himself in body and mind. His power is rooted in self-control. He knows when to be aggressive and how aggressive to be. He is the master of his energies, releasing them and pulling them back as he chooses. He decides the attitude he will take in a certain situation, instead of letting the situation dictate how he feels. Unlike the boyhood Hero archetype, the Warrior understands his limits; he takes calculated instead of unnecessary risks. His discipline also frees him of a fear of pain. Feeble, mediocre men believe all pain is bad. The Warrior knows there is bad pain and good pain. He is willing, even eager to withstand psychological and physical pain on the path to his goals. Hes the kind of man who subscribes to the pain is just weakness leaving the body philosophy; he relishes difficulty because it makes him stronger. Emotionally Detached

Not all the time, but when he is in Warrior mode. To complete his mission, the Warrior must be emotionally detachedfrom the fear and doubt generated by his own feelings, from the intimidation emanating from his enemy, and from the shoulds and demands put on him by friends and family. The Warrior needs the kind of mental clarity that only comes from single-minded purpose, or as Moore puts it, The Warrior needs room to swing his sword. Switching off that emotional detachment when away from the mission represents the great challenge for the Warrior. The inability to do so can result in one of the Warriors shadows. Creative Destroyer The Warrior is the archetype of destruction. However, the Warrior in his fullness only destroys in order to make room for something new and fresh and more alive. His is an act of creative destructionhe doesnt tear things down simply for the pleasure of doing so. We call upon the Warrior archetype when we quit bad habits and replace them with better ones or when we get rid of people in our lives who bring us down and surround ourselves with people who edify. <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-20873" title="warrior3" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/10/warrior3.png" alt="" width="262" height="425" />

The Shadows
The Sadist. As just discussed, men in touch with the Warrior archetype have the ability to detach themselves from emotions and human relationships. While detachment provides a man with much needed focus on important tasks, when it becomes a mans permanent state, the Sadist shadow controls a mans psyche. This is why soldiers, who have a mission-minded attitude while on deployment, can find it very difficult to adjust to life back home and find their place in their families, which are based on emotional needs and currentsthe stuff the solider has been used to setting aside. The missionfocused life freed him from human pettinessand returning to it can be grating. This is also true of lawyers, ministers, doctors, politicians, and other men who may be married to their jobshifting from mission-mode to domestic-mode can be difficult for them. As the name implies, the Sadist can be cruel, even to those most vulnerable. He disdains the weak. A commanding officer in the Army may try to rigidly

run his family in the same way that he led his troops. The Sadist creates unattainably high standards for himself and those around him. When a child comes home with a less than perfect grade, a father influenced by the Sadist will put her down and berate her mercilessly. A man with positive Warrior energy would have kindly shown disappointment, but then offered to help his daughter study for the next exam so she could ace it. The Sadists disgust at weakness is linked to the boyhood Hero archetype. The Hero tries to break away from his mother and from feminine energy in general as he seeks to become his own man. But adult men who are still insecure about being man enough project this insecurity onto others. He hates what he fears is within himself. According to Moore, men possessed by the Sadist also tend to be workaholics. Theyre the men who take pride in working all night at the office and coming home at 7AM, only to leave for the office again an hour later. Theyll choose work at the expense of health and even family. They take the Warriors comfort with pain to an extreme and grind it out to get to the top. But theyre doing it because they really dont know what they want out of life, and constantly working distracts them from this fact. Once they do reach the top, they often feel empty, lost, and bitter. But many Sadists simply burn out before they even get there. The Masochist. The Masochist is the passive shadow in the tripartite Warrior archetype, and its attributes closely parallel those of the boyhood Hero archetypes cowardly shadow. A man possessed by the Masochist feels he is powerless. He is a push-over who has no personal boundaries and will let others walk all over him. He may hate his job or the relationship hes in and complain about it, but instead of quitting, cutting his losses and moving on, he digs in and tries harder to be who his boss or girlfriend wants him to be and takes even more abuse. Because while he might complain about the pain, he really likes it. This is the man who enjoys being the martyr. An archetypes bi-polar shadows often work together against a man. Men under the Masochists influence will take the disrespect others dish out without fighting back or asserting themselves. Then one day something, maybe a criticism from his wife, pushes him over the edge and he explodes with sadistic verbal [and sometimes even] physical abuse.

How to Access the Warrior Archetype

Many men today lack Warrior energy. Theyve been told all their lives that aggression is bad and they should just work on being be nice guys. But if theres anything the world needs today, its men in touch with the Warrior

archetype. Its the energy that propels men to dare greatly and to fight for a worthy cause. So what can we do to access this positive Warrior energy? Watch movies about great warriors. Yeah, its cliche, but it works. They dont necessarily have to be war movies. Any film that showcases men with the warrior spirit will do. Here are a few of my favorite warrior movies. Id love to read yours: Braveheart Gladiator The Seven Samurai Last of the Mohicans Shane Glory Patton Read biographies about great warriors. Also, dig into writings like those of Marcus Aurelius (the ultimate philosopher-warrior). Take up boxing
[4]

or another martial art.

[6]

[5]

Do something that scares you.

Work on becoming more decisive. Meditate.

[8]

[7]

Especially on death.

[9]

Quit shoulding on yourself. [10] The Warrior is able to detach himself from the opinions of others in order to carry out his mission. Find your core values.
[11]

Have a plan and purpose for your life.

[12]

Boost your adaptability by strengthening your resilience.

[13]

Study and practice the skills necessary for completing your goals. Whether thats marksmanship, computer programming, or being charismatic, become a master of your trade. Find the principles that youre loyal to
[14]

Establish some non-negotiable, unalterable terms (or N.U.Ts) and live by them. [15] Compete in a race like the Warrior Dash right in the name!
[16]

. Its got the word warrior

Strengthen your discipline by establishing habits routines. [18] Adopt a minimalist philosophy your diet. [21] Get out of debt. [22]
[19]

[17]

and daily .
[20]

. Declutter your life

[20]

Simplify

Article printed from The Art of Manliness: http://artofmanliness.com URL to article: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/10/23/the-fourarchetypes-of-the-mature-masculine-the-warrior/ URLs in this post: [1] King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: http://www.amazon.com/gp/ product/0062506064/ref=as_li_ss_tl? ie=UTF8&tag=stucosuccess-20&linkCode=as2&camp=217145&creat ive=399369&creativeASIN=0062506064 [2] reading the introduction to the series: http://artofmanliness.com../ 2011/10/04/2011/09/13/2011/07/31/king-warrior-magicianlover-introduction/ [3] the Hero is the boyhood archetype: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2011/09/13/the-four-archetypes-of-mature-masculinity-theboyhood-archetypes-part-ii/ [4] boxing: http://artofmanliness.com/2010/06/17/boxing-basicspart-i-how-to-wrap-your-hands/ [5] martial art. : http://artofmanliness.com/2010/01/12/a-mansguide-to-the-martial-arts-getting-started/ [6] Do something that scares you. : http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/06/28/30-days-to-a-better-man-day-29-conquer-a-fear/ [7] Work on becoming more decisive. : http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/08/09/being-decisive/ [8] Meditate.: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/09/07/a-primer-onmeditation/ [9] on death.: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/03/20/what-manunderstands-that-he-is-dying-daily-this-is-your-life/ [10] Quit shoulding on yourself.: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2011/01/24/dont-should-all-over-yourself/

[11] Find your core values.: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/05/31/30-days-to-a-better-man-day-1-define-your-corevalues/ [12] Have a plan and purpose for your life.: http:// artofmanliness.com/2011/02/08/create-a-life-plan/ [13] Boost your adaptability by strengthening your resilience. : http://artofmanliness.com/2010/01/19/building-your-resiliencypart-1-an-introduction/ [14] Find the principles that youre loyal to: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/10/25/on-manly-loyalty/ [15] Establish some non-negotiable, unalterable terms (or N.U.Ts) and live by them. : http://artofmanliness.com/2009/06/17/30days-to-a-better-man-day-18-find-your-n-u-t-s/ [16] Warrior Dash: http://warriordash.com/ [17] establishing habits: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/12/07/ forging-habits-of-steel-7-tips-on-making-and-breaking-habits/ [18] daily routines.: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/09/05/ bookend-your-day-the-power-of-morning-and-evening-routines/ [19] Adopt a minimalist philosophy: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/10/11/go-small-or-go-home-in-praise-of-minimalism/ [20] Declutter your life: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/06/12/30days-to-a-better-man-day-13-declutter-your-life-and-make-someextra-cash/ [21] Simplify your diet.: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/01/01/ your-grandpas-diet-plan/ [22] Get out of debt.: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/06/24/30days-to-a-better-man-day-25-start-a-debt-reduction-plan/ Click here to print. Copyright 2010 The Art of Manliness. All rights reserved. - The Art of Manliness - http://artofmanliness.com -

The Four Archetypes of the Mature Masculine: The Magician

Posted By Brett On November 28, 2011 @ 11:54 pm In A Man's Life,On Manhood | 31 Comments

<img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-21555" title="magician" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/11/magician.jpg" alt="" width="497" height="742" /> This is the fifth part of a series on the archetypes of mature masculinity based on the book King, Warrior, Magician, Lover [1] by Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette. If you havent already, I highly recommend reading the introduction to the series [2] first. Also, keep in mind that these posts are a little more esoteric than our normal fare, and are meant to be contemplated and thoughtfully reflected upon. Many a boy goes through a magic phase growing up. He learns a few card tricks, and maybe goes down to the local magic store to browse for more elaborate tricks. Even just entering the store is a little thrilling, as is showing off newly learned tricks to ones family and friends. Most men outgrow their magic hobby, although not necessarily their fascination with the art. But even the professional ranks of magicians are dominated by men. So why are men so drawn to magic? The masculine attraction to magic can be traced to something much deeper than the ability to pull a rabbit out of a hat. Rather, it is rooted in what the magicians abilities representthe power that comes from the mastery of a secret knowledge and the ability to use that knowledge to manipulate tools in order to control certain elements and produce desired outcomes. The yearning to harness and possess that power is what fuels the Magician archetype, an energy that every man should seek, whether or not he ever hopes to saw a lady in half.

The Characteristics of the Magician in His Fullness

Intellectually Curious/The Holder of Hidden Knowledge As Moore puts it, The Magician is the knower. What does he know? Secret and hidden knowledge of all kinds. While this kind of knowledge sounds very esoteric, and it can be, Moore is simply referring to any kind of knowledge that is not immediately apparent or commonsensical. It is knowledge you learn in degrees, its mastery takes great effort and diligence, and the reward is to be able to dwell in a realm that the average man does not have access to. Moore argues that: All knowledge that takes special training to acquire is the province of the Magician energy. Whether you are an apprentice training to become a

master electrician and unraveling the mysteries of high voltage; or a medical student, grinding away night and day, studying the secrets of the human body and using available technologies to help your patients; or a would-be stockbroker or a student of high finance; or a trainee in one of the psychoanalytic schools, you are in exactly the same position as the apprentice shaman or witch doctor in tribal societies. You are spending large amounts of time, energy, and money in order to be initiated into rarefied realms of secret power. You are undergoing an ordeal testing your capacities to become a master of this power. And, as is true in all initiations, there is no guarantee of success. As you go about your studies or the day-to-day duties of your profession, you probably dont feel like youre acting in a realm of secret power. But take a step back and consider itwhether its how to set a bone or repair a carburetor, you probably can do things that to others are completely obscure and shrouded in mystery. A Master of Technology <img class="size-full wp-image-21559" title="tesla" src="http://content.artofmanliness.com/ uploads//2011/11/tesla1.jpg" alt="" width="451" height="292" /> Nikola Tesla A few months ago I bought an iPad. I love it. The first time I swiped across its screen, I felt like I was using some sort of magic gazing mirror that granted me access to an infinite amount of knowledge right at my fingertips. One minute I can be reading a biography of Winston Churchill and the next I can be watching a free video lecture about Churchill on YouTube. The iPad, along with other tablet devices, are great examples of science fiction writer Arthur C. Clarkes third rule: any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. And indeed, the Magician is a master of technology. When men learn the secret knowledge of how the world works, and use that knowledge to harness its laws, energies, and forces in order to manipulate them into practical tools and systems, theyre accessing Magician energy. Inventors, scientists, and just simple tinkerers are examples of masters of technology. Its funny how we often imbue our most famous inventors and creators with almost supernatural qualities. Newspapers dubbed Thomas Edison The Wizard of Menlo Park, legends sprouted up about Nikola Tesla and his power over electricity, and recent obituaries about Steve Jobs would often refer to his creations as almost magical. Becoming a master of technology doesnt require that we invent a device like the iPad. Instead, we simply need to create. Theres a concept in the Western esoteric tradition of Hermeticism that the goal of man should be to

live the principle of: as above, so below. Its sort of similar to Christs admonition in the Lords prayer to make on earth as it is in heaven. Several interpretations exist as to the meaning of as above, so below, but the interpretation that I like is that it means making our amorphous thoughts, imaginations, and dreams a reality. In order to accomplish this, we must use all the knowledge and tools at our disposal. In short, we must become masters of technology. Reflective The Warrior [3]is the archetype of action. But he gets his marching orders from the Magician. This is the energy that powers healthy introspection. When youre facing a tough decision, your deliberations on which course to take are powered by the Magician. His power comes from thoughtful reflection and meditation; the Magician is like an excellent chess player; the more he experiences and studies, the more he is able to see life like a chess board, envision all the possible moves, and predict with good accuracy where those moves will lead. This ability also generates a mans hunches and gut feelings and the spontaneous decisions he makes in a time of crisis. Reticent <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-21562" title="miyagi" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/11/miyagi.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="292" /> In todays society, information has been greatly democratized, and people expect everything there is to be known to be available to every person. If you tell someone that certain knowledge is sacred, secret, or just too advanced for them to understand, theyre typically deeply offended and automatically assume that youre up to something suspicious. But great teachers throughout history understood that knowledge and truth must be taught precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little. Effective learning must be done in degreeseach advancement is earned by the mastery of the previous step. Each concept builds on the other, until a person has acquired perfect knowledge. Those who try to jump into the deep end without first learning to swim can drown. For that reason, men accessing Magician energy are reticent about the knowledge they possess, only sharing it with the earnest student who continually proves he is a worthy of the knowledge he seeks. Alchemist of Life

<img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-21558" title="JosephWright-Alchemist" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/11/JosephWright-Alchemist.jpg" alt="" width="451" height="640" /> The alchemists of antiquity sought to find a way to turn the baser elements into gold. And this inclination to turn a sows ear into a purse is a vital current in the Magicians stream of energy. When the Magician archetype is integrated into a man, he looks for ways to turn disappointing situations and setbacks into opportunities to learn, grow, and become a better man. Spiritual Mediator As Moore puts it, the Magician understands the link between the unseen world of the spiritsthe Divine Worldand the world of human beings and nature. As the mediator between these worlds, the Magician has the ability to explain complicated spiritual ideas in ways others can easily grasp. If youve ever talked to a friend who used a simple metaphor to resolve your doubts, that was the Magician energy at work.

Initiation and the Modern Obstacle to Accessing Magician Energy

<img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-21563" title="ini" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/11/ini.jpg" alt="" width="497" height="341" /> There are two main roles that the energy of the Magician flow throughthe initiate and the initiator. Or in the other words, the mentee and the mentor. As we just discussed, Magician energy drives us to obtain hidden knowledge. But contrary to the popular adage about professional magiciansthat they never reveal their tricksa man truly animated by the mature Magician archetype is eager to turn around and share what he has learned with others. He desires to elevate the serious and earnest seeker to his level. This is why the lack of magician energy in modern culture is really at the heart of the issues many men are having today. There is a lack of mature men who have made a rite-of-passage themselves available to initiate other men into the secret knowledge of manhood. Dads and granddads, uncles and cousins, used to teach their sons and other young men how to act, dress, and behave like a man. But a lot of men have grown up without such a mentor these days and thus feel lost, directionless, and adrift. This is not only true when it comes to being initiated into manhood, however, but also applies to a mans professional path as well. For the most

part, gone are the days of guilds and intimate apprenticeships, and trade schools have fallen in popularity. Men are in fierce competition with each other and are looking out only for themselves, thus there is often no one willing to initiate a man into his vocation. It is telling that apprenticeships have been replaced by internships; instead of getting initiated into the job, interns are made to do the undesirable grunt work of others and then cut loose when their temporary stint is up. That many men have an unfulfilled hunger for initiation into some kind of secret knowledge can be evidenced by the soaring popularity of pick-up and seduction artists who promise, for a few hundred or thousand dollars, to teach initiates the secrets to scoring lots of ladies. And a lot of guys who cant find mentors otherwise are willing to pony up big time dough to hire them. On the surface, the popularity of the PUA movement is due simply to the desire to want to be great at picking up chicks, but I think its really a manifestation of this deeper hunger to be initiated into a secret realm, to have knowledge that others dont. And actually you see this kind of language used in a lot of PUA forumspeople talk about the different levels of knowledge you gain, and how only 10% of people who study the subject ever really understand it, etc. I know a few guys that have gotten something out of some of these classes and books. Mainly, theyre learning basic social skills they just didnt pick up as kids. However, I dont think young men can fully satiate their hunger for initiation into manhood in the pick-up artist scene for a few reasons. First, most PUA gurus are nothing more than internet marketing hucksters that prey on a young mans sexual insecurity in order to make a buck. Instead of being in touch with positive Magician energy, many PUA coaches are possessed with the Magicians shadow, the Manipulator. The initiation into manhood that these gurus offer lacks the gravitas and depth of an initiation from men who have fully developed the mature masculine within themselves. Second, the manliness of PUA devotees is constantly defined in the context of womenthey are consumed with thinking about women how they think, how they can be manipulated, how to talk to them, where to meet them, and so on. But manhood is not about women. Look at any great man of the pastnone of them made women their main focus. Instead, they concentrated on mastering a more significant subject of hidden knowledge, one which created a real and lasting legacy [4] for them. Their success then naturally attracted women to them, without the need for any special gimmicks.

<img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-21564" title="mag" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/11/mag.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="461" />

The Shadows of the Magician Archetype

The Detached Manipulator The Magician in his fullness desires to initiate other men into his knowledge, bringing them up from degree to degree so that they can become better and happier men. The Manipulator Shadow poses as the Magician in his fullness he teases would-be initiates with the prospect of learning his secrets, but he does not give them all his knowledge. He withholds things from them in order to feed both his pride and his pocketbook. Shadow Manipulators charge their seekers a ton of money with the promise that the student can become just like them, but dont give away the real secrets to doing that, and especially the secret that they often cant become just like them, because their own success was due to x,y, or z factor that wont happen to anyone else. The internet has created an army of Shadow Manipulators. Everywhere you look there are hucksters promising you the secrets to bedding women, losing weight, making money onlineif youll only buy their $200 eBook. Shadow manipulators play a prominent role on our cultural stage as well. Wall Street bankers, politicians, ad agencies, and media pundits are all absolute experts in getting a following by sharing some of the story, but not all of it. Another aspect of the Manipulator is his cynical detachment from other people. I see this Shadow in guys too often. Theyre the ones who, when confronted with their inability to commit to anything, be passionate about anything, or enjoy any pleasures in life, will retort with The unexamined life is not worth living. Moore summarizes this mans issues very well: This is the man who thinks too much, who stands back from his life and never lives it. He is caught in a web of pros and cons about his decisions and lost in a labyrinth of reflective meanderings from which he cannot extricate himself. He is afraid to live, to leap into battle. He can only sit on his rock and think. The years pass. He wonders where the time has gone. And he ends by regretting a life of sterility. He is a voyeur, an armchair adventurer. In the world of academia, he is a hairsplitter. In the fear of making the wrong decision, he makes none. In his fear of living, he also cannot participate in the joy and pleasure that other people experience in their lived lives. If he is withholding from others, and not sharing what he knows, he

eventually feels isolated and lonely. To the extent that he has hurt others with his knowledge and technologyin whatever field and in whatever way by cutting himself off from living relatedness with other human beings, he has cut off his own soul. The Innocent One The Innocent One is the passive pole of the bi-polar shadow. A man possessed by the Innocent One shadow wants all the power, glory, and status that comes with harnessing the Magician archetype in his fullness, but he isnt willing to put in the work or take on the responsibility that said power, glory, and status requires. They see another man doing something really cool, and decide they want to do it too. These are guys who get super excited about a new hobby, or faith, or career paththeir excitement is absolutely coursing through thembut after the easy part has passed (coming up with the name of the band, buying a skateboard, designing the start-ups logo), they realize how much dead work [5] is required to get really good at the cool thing, and they give up. Men haunted by the shadow of the Innocent One want to be millionaires, but arent willing to toil and work years to achieve it. They want to play guitar like Django Reinhardt, but they give up guitar lessons after just a few weeks. They want to be spiritual, but without all that prayer, meditation, and scripture study business. But the Innocent Ones shadow behavior doesnt stop there. Because a man in touch with the Innocent One can never attain or achieve his goals because of laziness, he doesnt want others to achieve their goals and ambitions either. He becomes a stumbling block to others simply out of envy. A man possessed by the Innocent One begrudges the success of others and does all that he can to diminish it. Theodore Roosevelt despised this type of man. To him, a man possessed by the Innocent One was one of those cold and timid souls, who know neither victory nor defeat.

How to Access the Magician Archetype

Commit to lifelong learning Meditate [6] Create more, consume less. [7] Work with your hands. [8] Take part in a rite of passage [9] Find a mentor [10] Become a mentor [11] Join a Fraternal organization like the Freemasons or Knights of Columbus

Carve out a sacred space in your life. This is, in my opinion, the biggest key to accessing the Magician archetype. In the life of the modern man, there is no line between the sacred and the profane. But if you want access to the insights, energies, and ideas that exist on a plane above that of your ordinary, day-to-day life, then you need an entryway to that higher realm. Sacred space is that gateway. Carve out a ritual for yourself, a time or a physical space where you are not interrupted, where others are not privy to what you think about. Maybe its listening to Bach in your study after the kids go to bed. Maybe its finding a special, secluded grove in the park where you go to think. Maybe its a morning walk in the woods. Maybe its going to morning weekday Mass without your family. Whatever it is, draw a line around it and make it sacred in your life.

Article printed from The Art of Manliness: http://artofmanliness.com URL to article: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/11/28/the-fourarchetypes-of-the-mature-masculine-the-magician/ URLs in this post: [1] King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: http://www.amazon.com/gp/ product/0062506064/ref=as_li_ss_tl? ie=UTF8&tag=stucosuccess-20&linkCode=as2&camp=217145&creat ive=399369&creativeASIN=0062506064 [2] reading the introduction to the series: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2011/10/23/2011/10/04/2011/09/13/2011/07/31/king-warriormagician-lover-introduction/ [3] The Warrior : http://artofmanliness.com/2011/10/23/the-fourarchetypes-of-the-mature-masculine-the-warrior/ [4] a real and lasting legacy: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/06/13/ the-5-switches-of-manliness-legacy/ [5] dead work: http://artofmanliness.com/2010/05/27/vocationthe-necessity-of-dead-work/ [6] Meditate: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/09/07/a-primer-onmeditation/ [7] Create more, consume less.: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2010/04/06/modern-maturity-create-more-consume-less/ [8] Work with your hands.: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/06/22/30-days-to-a-better-man-day-23-learn-a-manual-skill/

[9] Take part in a rite of passage: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2008/11/09/coming-of-age-the-importance-of-male-rites-ofpassage/ [10] Find a mentor: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/06/02/30days-to-a-better-man-day-3-find-a-mentor/ [11] Become a mentor: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/02/15/ mentors-for-men/ Click here to print. Copyright 2010 The Art of Manliness. All rights reserved. - The Art of Manliness - http://artofmanliness.com -

The Four Archetypes of the Mature Masculine: The Lover

Posted By Brett On October 4, 2011 @ 5:26 pm In A Man's Life,On Manhood | 28 Comments <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-20533" title="kwmlheader" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/10/kwmlheader.jpg" alt="" width="400" height="256" />This is the third part of a series on the archetypes of mature masculinity based on the book King, Warrior, Magician, Lover [1] by Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette. If you havent already, I highly recommend reading the introduction to the series [2] first. Also, keep in mind that these posts are a little more esoteric than our normal fare, and are meant to be contemplated and thoughtfully reflected upon. In our previous articles in this series, we focused on the archetypes of boy psychology. Today we take a look at the first archetype of the mature masculine: the Lover. I originally planned on following how the book orders the archetypes by starting off with the King and finishing with the Lover. But Will, a longtime AoM Community member, suggested that I swap their places. Why? Because according to Moore and other Jungians, each archetype powers up at certain phases in a mans life. The Lover (as well soon see) is the archetype of youthful idealism and excitement and is usually the first of the archetypes to develop in a man. The King archetype usually power ups last and is a culmination of the other archetypes.

I thought this was a good approach, so thats what Ill be doing. Thanks Will! With that said, lets get started analyzing the Lover archetype.

The Lover in His Fullness

When you hear the word lover you probably think of romance and sex. But there are many types of lovea love for family, for friends, for God, and for life itselfand the Lover archetype passionately seeks after them all. The Lover is the archetype of emotion, feeling, idealism, and sensuality. Like the word lover, sensuality is often exclusively associated with sex but really has a far broader application. Being sensual means opening up and using all of your senses in all areas of your lifetouching, tasting, smelling, hearing, and seeingor in other wordsexperiencing as many dimensions of life as possible, as often as possible. Thus, when a man taps into the Lover archetypes energy, he feels alive with vim and vigor and connected to the world and those around him. A man in touch with the Lover archetype feels deeply, whether those feelings are of joy or pain. The Lover is attuned to the mysterious forces underlying our everyday existence; this is the archetype that fuels a mans spirituality, and the one in which the Muses reside. When we get those flashes of inspiration or sparks of creativity, thats Lover energy manifesting itself in our lives. A man who takes time to develop this archetype will experience those hunches, insights, and premonitions more frequently than men who dont. A man who has fully developed the Lover archetype in his life is also often adept at reading people and social cues. Hes empathetic with others and understands how to get along and connect with a wide variety of people. Because the Lover is so alive and sensual, he enjoys all of lifes pleasures, whether it be good food and drink, beautiful art, or gorgeous women. This is the archetype that spurs our appetites. But these hungers arent just for baser pleasures like sex and food, but for a life of meaning and purpose. And in seeking the freedom to passionately pursue these ends, the Lover can see limits and rules as constraining. This is why the Lover archetype has a unique relationship to the other three archetypes of mature masculinity. While the Lovers energy seeks to be

boundless, the King, Warrior, and Magician archetypes provide a man with structure and discipline. Thus the Lovers passion fuels and powers these three life forces, and in turn, they channel and harness the Lovers energy in a healthy way and towards worthy goals. You can find the Lover archetype in myths and rituals that span culture and time. The Greek god Dionysus presents perhaps the most salient example. Dionysus was the god of wine, merriment, art, passion, and sex. His followers believed that when a man became so overcome with emotion that he appeared mad, Dionysus was to blame. The yearly festival held in his honor each spring was a ritual inspired by the Lover archetype: lots of drinking, lots of dancing, lots of theater, and lots of sex. A modern story that exemplifies the Lover archetype is Zorba the Greek. Zorba is a man who lives life fully. Hes earthy. He loves good food and drink. He dances his heart out. Zorba understands that for a man to be truly free, he needs to have a deep emotional life; he needs a little madness:

Thats a man who has a healthy dose of the Lover archetype in his life. The Lover archetype is usually the first that develops in a man. Look at most young men and you see that theyre often ruled by the passionate Lover archetype. Theyre looking for new and exciting endeavors, they develop intense romantic and sexual relationships, and theyre filled with youthful idealism. Their experiences are marked by an acute intensity. <img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-20534" title="immature" src="http:// content.artofmanliness.com/uploads//2011/10/immature.jpg" alt="" width="320" height="423" / >

The Shadows
Remember that each archetype has both a pinnacle, which represents the fullness of the archetype, and a bi-polar shadow split. These shadows are the result of the archetype not being integrated into a man in a healthy and coherent way. The two shadows of the Lover archetype are the Addicted Lover and the Impotent Lover. The Addicted Lover If the other archetypes do not harness the Lovers energy, the Addicted Lover shadow can result.

A man possessed by the Addicted Lover is, as Moore puts it, eternally restless. Hes forever searching for that one thing, person, or experience that will make him feel truly alive. But whether its because he has overinflated expectations, or because he doesnt even know what hes searching for in the first place, the vague hunger that endlessly hounds him is never satisfied. The Addicted Lover falls in love with every girl he dates, and then wallows in despair when she dumps him. Hes constantly getting ideas for inventions or businesses that will make him rich, but he never works at them long enough to get them off the ground. His apartment is cluttered with junk he bought on a whim and never used. His passport is filled with stamps, but he doesnt feel any happier than we he left home to travel the world. The Addicted Lover is a collectorof experiences, possessions, or women. But without any structure, any overarching life philosophy to connect the things he collects, his life feels fragmentary instead of whole. Without a channel through which to run, the Lovers energy dissipates into a million directions. The flip side of this shadow is the man who takes all of the Lovers energy and focuses it on one thing. He can become so obsessed with the objects of his desire that instead of bringing joy, they bring destruction and ruin. Perhaps you know a man who became so involved in a vice, a project, or even a hobby that it ruined him financially and destroyed his relationships. That was a man possessed by the Addicted Lover. I think Jay Gatsby from The Great Gatsby [3] (my favorite book, by the way), is a perfect example of a man possessed by the Addicted Lover. He longs for the wealthy Daisy Buchanan for his entire life. Hes addicted to the idea of being with Daisy and spends his life amassing a fortune through criminal activity just so he can be with her. But in the end, Daisy disappoints Gatsby. The real Daisy didnt match the fantasy of her that Gatsby had obsessed about for years. If you read the book, you know what happens to ol Jay Gatsby in the end. Lesson learned: being possessed by the Addicted Lover leads to ruin. The Impotent Lover The Impotent Lover shadow arises when a man is out of touch with the Lover archetype in its fullness. While the Lover in his fullness sees the world in vivid colors and textures, the Impotent Lover only sees gray. Men dogged by the Impotent Lover archetype feel depressed, flat, and dead inside. Nothing brings them joy anymore. Theyve lost their passion for life.

Relationships, whether romantic or platonic, struggle and falter for the man possessed by the Impotent Lover. Libido is non-existent in these men, as is their sex life. While the Addicted Lover does not give himself enough structure, the Impotent Lover can arise in a man who disciplines himself too much. This is often the case with devoutly religious men, who, going far beyond the admonishments of their faith, laden themselves with overly prudish rules, and feel shame when indulging in lifes pleasures. The energy of the Lover archetype builds up behind this dam of limits, and without a healthy channel to pursue, sooner or later it bursts forth in destructive ways, like addiction to porn. The Impotent Lover becomes the Addicted Lover.

Accessing the Lover Archetype

According to Moore, the Lover is the most repressed and stunted archetype in men today. Men in the West arent encouraged to be in touch with their feelings. As men, were supposed to be coolly detached from anything and anybody. But the great men in history understood that emotion, properly harnessed, is what drives greatness. The ancient Greeks called this passion for life thumos. Its a fire in the belly that propels a man to do great deeds. So accessing the Lover archetype is vital to our success as men. But how do we do it? The easiest way to tap into the Lover archetype is to take more time to really enjoy the stuff that brings you pleasure in life. The Addicted Lover is forever looking for the high that will last indefinitely. When he takes the first hit of somethingwhether a new drug, a new place, a new lover, or a new carhis brain lights up with pleasure. But our brains quickly get used to the same stimuli, and each additional hit brings diminishing returns. So the Addicted Lover will then take a bigger hit of the stimulus in order to feel the same pleasure he got the first time he tried it. But hell quickly get used to that dose too. And soon the Addicted Lover is stuck in a destructive cycle restlessness and dissatisfaction plague him. The answer to short-circulating this cycle and tapping into the Lover energy in a healthy way is something we have talked about a few times before: cultivating the virtue of moderation [4] and being fully present in your life. [5] Instead of reaching for more, you stop to experience the things you already have and do in a deeper way, using all of your senses. You turn lifes little everyday activities into indulgent, pleasure-inducing rituals.

For example, do you like drinking coffee? Create a slow, relaxing, coffeedrinking experience for yourself a couple times a week. Take a whiff of the beans before you grind them, carefully create your brew in a French press [6] , pour it into a mug you love, and slowly sip it on the porch, really enjoying the flavor. Chew your food slowly and really taste the flavors. Enjoy touching and kissing your womans skin instead of just immediately getting down to the deed, take a walk after a rain shower and breathe in that fresh smell. Remember, the Lover experiences as much of life as possible, with as many senses as possible. Another way to access the Lover is to take part in a hobby [7] youre passionate about, particularly ones that involves artistic skills or craftsmanship. Make it a priority in your schedule to spend time on that hobby. It doesnt matter how silly it is. As long as it gives you joy, and offers you a creative outlet, do it. A man seeking access to the Lover archetype should also make reading a lifelong habit. Immerse yourself in literature and writings on a variety of subjects to stimulate your brain and provide it with something to ponder other than whether to have a ham or turkey sandwich for lunch. Seeking knowledge will spur the Lovers capacity for imagination and inspiration. Spend time outdoors [8]hiking and camping. Nature helps you get in touch with the mysterious forces of life. And of course you can access the Lover archetype by taking time for romance. Plan a surprise date [9] for your wife or girlfriend. It doesnt have to be elaborate or expensive. [10] And dont just stop there. Write your woman love letters [11] or, if youre feeling particularly inspired, a love poem. Boom. Instant Lover access. In addition to the above suggestions, Moore also provides a few techniques to access all the mature masculine archetypes more fully in our lives. These techniques require what Moore calls active imagination. Moore suggests admiring and learning about men who exemplify each archetype. For the Lover, you can read biographies and study the work of great artists you admire. Maybe you can spend a month studying the life of Leonardo da Vinci. Or if youre a Hemingway fan, read all of Papas novels. A final technique to access the archetypes in your life is to act as if youre already accessing the archetype in your life. Its the old fake it until you

make it philosophy espoused by Aristotle. If you feel as if the Impotent Lover has taken control of your psyche and youve lost your vim and vigor, act as if you were passionate for life and were accessing the Lover archetype fully. If art never really interested you, force yourself to visit a museum and really look at the art. Act as if youre really interested and pretty soon you might find yourself no longer having to pretend.

Article printed from The Art of Manliness: http://artofmanliness.com URL to article: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/10/04/the-fourarchetypes-of-the-mature-masculine-the-lover/ URLs in this post: [1] King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: http://www.amazon.com/gp/ product/0062506064/ref=as_li_ss_tl? ie=UTF8&tag=stucosuccess-20&linkCode=as2&camp=217145&creat ive=399369&creativeASIN=0062506064 [2] reading the introduction to the series: http://artofmanliness.com../ 2011/09/13/2011/07/31/king-warrior-magician-loverintroduction/ [3] The Great Gatsby: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/ 0743273567/ref=as_li_ss_tl? ie=UTF8&tag=stucosuccess-20&linkCode=as2&camp=217145&creat ive=399369&creativeASIN=0743273567 [4] virtue of moderation: http://artofmanliness.com/2008/04/27/thevirtuous-life-moderation/ [5] fully present in your life.: http://artofmanliness.com/2010/11/22/ being-fully-present-as-a-man/ [6] brew in a French press: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/08/03/ brewing-the-perfect-cup-of-coffee/ [7] take part in a hobby: http://artofmanliness.com/2010/01/06/45manly-hobbies/ [8] Spend time outdoors: http://artofmanliness.com/2011/06/26/ the-5-switches-of-manliness-nature/ [9] Plan a surprise date: http://artofmanliness.com/2009/06/08/30days-to-a-better-man-day-9-take-a-woman-on-a-date/ [10] It doesnt have to be elaborate or expensive.: http:// artofmanliness.com/2011/07/06/10-cheap-date-ideas-shellactually-love/

[11] Write your woman love letters: http://artofmanliness.com/ 2009/06/27/30-days-to-a-better-man-day-28-write-a-love-letter/ Click here to print. Copyright 2010 The Art of Manliness. All rights reserved.