Welcome to the Magic City

Welcome to Billings, the largest city in Montana, and the home of your college, MSUBillings. When youre not in class or studying, take a break! Utilize your surroundings and get out there and enjoy what Billings has to offer. For those of you who havent spent much time in the Billings area before now, Ive made a list of things to check out while youre here.

How to Waste Your Time in Billings

AAPBL Skips Out on $40K Tab

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Pioneer Park

Lets Go To Bed? An Investigation

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While the weather is still nice this fall, hurry and get to Pioneer Park where you can swing over to the tennis courts for a quick game. There is a playground for children and in the midst of all the trees youll Photo by Melissa DeVries. See Magic City, page 4 A painted ram outside of the MSU-B Downtown office.

Fire Rages at Cottonwood Creek

Pull Out Calendar of Events
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Thursday night, August 25, along Cottonwood Creek six miles northwest of Park City a fire that was thought to have been properly moped up reignited. The fire became the largest fire in Stillwater county this summer, burning over 4,000 acres. Fire crews from Columbus, Park City, Absarokee, Nye, Molt, Joliet, Red Lodge, Roberts, Fromberg, Edgar, Rapelje, Laurel, Big Timber, BLM, and Reed Point, fought the fire day and night. However, as of Monday, August 29, the fire was not fully contained. Locals were lining back roads, making travel of emergency vehicles a daunting task, and causing wrecks. The morning of Saturday, August 27,

Governor Brian Schweitzer gave fire crews the green light to use whatever resources they needed. Soon after, two helicopters and three slurry bombers were hitting the fire at spots engine crews couldnt.

Streaker On Campus!
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Photos by Tim Stene. At top: The fire consumes the trees near Cottonwood Creek. Left: A Huey lowers itself onto the fire with a water basket hung under its belly. Right: Firefighter Tom Black (Left) and cartographer John Reisler plan their counter attack.

Fall Athletics Are Gearing Up

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1500 University Drive SUB 225

Billings, Mont an a 59101 ana Montan Business and Newsr oom: 406-657-2194 Newsroom: Fax: 406-657-2191 E-mail: ret or t@msubillings .edu retor ort@msubillings t@msubillings.edu

The Retort Staff

Editor-in-Chief...............Olivia Koernig Business Manager...........Yacine Zerizef Faculty Advisor.............Nancy Swanson Layout Editor................Dana Livermont Ad Manager...........................Niki Porter Copy Editor.............................VACANT News Editor........................Betsy Harris A & E Editor.................Melissa DeVries Sports Editor..........................Jed Barton Photo Editor................Nicole Livermont Creativity Editor............Heather Mencel Reporter..................................Tim Stene Reporter......................Emily Valenzuela Reporter.......................................VACANT Staff Writer..........................Paul Jangula Cartoonist............................Dan Hansen Columnist.........................Mike Schrage Columnist..........................Lyle Johnson
Guideline & Policies The Retort encourages the sumission of letters to the Editor. Letters must be under 250 words in length and include name, signature, and phone number. The Retort reserves the right to edit for space and possible libel. Letters should deal with subject matter relevant to the students, faculty, and staff of MSU-Billings. The Retort is published twice a month. Letters must be sumitted by the Friday after the most recnt issue date. The Publications Board of ASMSU-Billings advises The Retort, leaving content decisions to the editors. Opinions expressed in The Retort are not necessarily those of its members, the university, students, nor student, state, or federal governments.

Well, we all know that the road to hell is paved with good inHere we are: embarking on tentions. Usually one or two this adventure that is college. For weeks into the semester my resome, returning to school is some- lutions are amended. The revised thing I really look forward to each resolutions are a bit more lenient; break. I havent messed around yet still lend themselves quite with the intersession or summer nicely to the sense of accomplishsession nonsense, so I pretty much ment associated with a job well kick back when Im not going to done. school. All that R&R inevitably leaves me anxiety-ridden, won1. I resolve to take the stairs dering what Im doing with my to any classroom that is more than life, fearing that my brain is atro- one flight above my current posiphying and counting the days un- tion, unless Im hobbling around til classes start again. With this an- in a pair of ridiculously high heels ticipation comes a set of school or if my back pack contains one or year resolutions that I usually more Norton Anthology or if Im make and break at the outset of late for class due to non-complieach new semester. (Any of this ance with above rule number two. sound familiar?) Although I never In such instances, elevator use is sit down and write an actual list granted as long as I promise to of resolutions, if I did it would think about taking the stairs while look something like this: riding. 1. I resolve to boycott the elevator, instead taking the stairs every day to all of my classes all semester long, even to my Spanish class thats on the seventh floor in the Universitys attic where its always cold in the classrooms and haunted besides. 2. I resolve to get up early and make an attempt to look good for the first week of classes. After one week I will revert to my usual hour of snoozing and every other day showering and make up routine complete with rocking the weird hats that nobody likes but me on the off-shower days. This 2. I resolve to get up resolution may exceed the onepromptly each morning at the first week mark if I develop a crush on sound of my alarm, which will some cutie in my class, in which give me time to eat a balanced event the original number two will meal, drink my coffee, shower, fix still apply. my hair and apply my makeup every single day, all semester 3. I resolve to try not to sleep long. in class. In the occurrence of an innocent yet bizarre crush on a fac3. I resolve to make mean- ulty member, the original number ingful contributions daily in my three will apply to that professors classes. {Which will be facilitated class and the revised number three by this sub-resolution.} to all other professors classes. 3a. I resolve to do ALL required reading AND homework for each of my classes, truly seeking to grasp and master all lessons provided by my professors. 4. I resolve to make a 4.0 GPA this semester. 5. I resolve to imbibe only once a month all semester long. {Which will be enhanced by this sub-resolution.} 5a. At those monthly indulgences, I resolve to drink in moderation and never to excess and I further resolve to never surrender to any dipsomaniacal tendencies on a school night. 4. I resolve not to flunk more than 62.74 percent of my attempted credits or whatever the arbitrary percentage that federal aid has set forth. 5. I resolve not to drink at school. 5a. In the event that drinking at school is imperative for some unforeseen reason (i.e. waking up drunk on a school day, etc.), I resolve not to become addicted to crank all semester long.

Greetings From Student Body Prez

have an option of joining a group or club on campus that is dedicated to On behalf of the ASMSU-B Student Government, I would like to say Welcome to MSU-Billings, to all of our new students, and Welcome back, to those who are returning. As a member of your student government this year, I hope to personally meet and get to know as many of you as possible throughout the course of the school year. As many of you already know, each year brings new opportunities to get involved on campus. Whether your interests lie in chemistry, drama/ plays, student-run newspapers, international studies, etc you always get more out of your college experience, join a group and get involved. One great way to get involved here at MSU-B is by getting involved with ASMSU-B Student Senate. The Senate is comprised of 18 senators who are elected by the entire student body during fall and spring elections. These senators are volunteers who serve the students by listening and responding to student concerns throughout the campuses. They conPhoto from The Retort archives. vene once every week to discuss stuTracie Overberg, ASMSU-B dent concerns, possible solutions to President these concerns, and ways to keep the entire student body better informed your interests. We have over forty ac- about campus activities and importive clubs and organizations at MSU- tant legislation that pertains directly Billings this year. So if you want to to students here at MSU-Billings. Essentially, they can be spotted by their dark blue t-shirts labeled senator, their energy, and their signature duty of standing up at the beginning of classes to announce upcoming events, and their overall efforts keep students better informed. If anyone is interested in applying to be a senator this year, please pick up an application in the senate office (SUB 213). Fall elections will be held on September 14 and 15. Thank you all for your time. I wish you the best of luck in your first few weeks of classes. If anyone has any questions or concerns, please feel free to contact me at the student government office (213) or call at 1(406)-657-1698.

There Is Such Thing As Free Lunch

As the Beatles famous song goes Hello, hello, I dont know why you say good bye, I say hello, the All American Professional Basketball League (AAPBL) closed their doors Monday, August 1, three months before the inaugural game of their first season, and said good bye for good. League President and CEO Worth Christie announced in a prepared statement Monday, August 1, that the league is immediately cutting all outgoing financial obligations. Therefore we have to terminate all employees immediately. The Billings Rims general manager Mike Marcrum said in a interview Monday August 1 with the Billings Gazette I think it was just an over ambitious dream that was under funded. Under funded and in debt, as of Tuesday August 2 the League had run up a $250,000 tab around Billlings. There were 128 players who were housed and fed at Rimrock hall for two weeks racking up a $40,000 debt. The bill is divided into two parts, housing-$20,000, and food$20,000. A deposit of $1,500 was received for housing, nevertheless none was received for food. They ate our food services but didnt put down a deposit, said Jeannie Mclsaac-Tracy director of student life and housing at MSUB. Nevertheless the food services is not owned by MSUB rather it is contracted out. Since the food services is not owned by us (MSUB) the bill will be transferred to the company, and they will decide whether to pursue the loss, said Mclsaac- Tracy. Now that the AAPBL disappeared into the night, our administration is frantically sending our bills, calling disconnected numbers and counting on some lucky stars they wont be slam-dunked. Previously, when the AAPBL had a good name, the MSUB administration was jumping at the chance to be a good community partner, We always house people for various events every summer and use the profits to maintain the dorms. Its just sad that things turned out this way. Said MclsaacTracy. The AAPBL has a paper trail a mile ling all around the Billings area, including a $36,000 bill to Metra Park. The men who were attending the tryouts had to pay $1000 each to participate. That money could have been used to pay off a few organizations, yet Montana State University Billings should have invested in a little more research.

Graphic by Nicole Livermont

MSU-B Welcomes New Interim Provost

Many changes are taking place at MSU-Billings. This last spring the university lost its Provost and Academic Vice Chancellor, Dr. Janie Park, who had fulfilled the duties involved with the position since 1996. Dr. Park received the incredible opportunity to become the president of Chadron State College of Nebraska, but with her leaving, the important position of Provost and Vice Chancellor of academic affairs was left vacant. The Provost serves as head of academic affairs, one of three entities governed under Chancellor Ronald P. Sexton. The provost and vice chancellor of academic affairs then directs all things academic on campus, including overseeing all six colleges, academic support services, the honors program, and much more. The importance of the provost is obvious, so when Dr. Park announced her resignation, a rigorous but speedy search was conducted to name a temporary replacement. The result: at MSU-Billings was named interim Provost and Vice Chancellor of academic affairs. Dr. White came to MSUBillings in 2000, and has been making significant changes ever since. He has worked diligently to push the College of Education and the Graduate Studies program toward excellence. In 2003, the College of Education was the only one in the nation to receive the prestigious award of Best Practice in Support of Teacher Preparation Accreditation by the American Association of Colleges for Teacher Education. This was an enormous achievement for both the College Photo by Nicole Livermont. of Education and Dr. White. Dr. George White analyzes some With his outstanding record paperwork. of achievement, Dr. White was an Dr. George White, previous Dean obvious candidate for the interim of the College of Education and provost position, and he will conDirector of Graduate Studies here tinue to impact the university, but

now on a broader field. Dr. White says that the academic community can expect many things from him as he fulfills his duties as provost, most importantly CQI, or continuous quality improvement. Dr. White will work to consistently evaluate the colleges and the professors to better understand the strengths and weaknesses of each, and to address any problem areas. With this, White says students will receive a better quality of product from the university. Meanwhile the university is doing a massive national search to find someone to fill the role of provost and vice chancellor of academic affairs. It is hoped that one will be in place by July of 2006. Dr. White has not decided if he would like to pursue the role permanently, but in the meantime expect to see great things from him.

on street corners and in front of businesses that have sponsored Continued from page 1 the project. Local artists from the area volunteered their talfind an impressive eighteenents to later sell the 38 rams at hole Frisbee golf course with an auction to raise money for the the poles and nets easy to spot. renovation of the Billings DeIn the middle of the park theres pot, located on Montana Ava creek running through the enue. course. This makes the shot somewhat of a challenge for Farmers Market fear of having to fish the disc Also downtown, Farmers out of the water, or worse, fall- Market is always fun to check ing in, but it does add some out with its small town feel in competitiveness to the game. the big city. From 8 a.m. to 12 The nice part about Pioneer p.m. on Saturday mornings,

Magic City

youll come across many strollers and dogs on leashes but everyone is very gracious and unhurried. The smell of mini doughnuts and fresh flowers make you feeling like eating a lot, taking a nap, or both. If youve got a Saturday morning to waste do it at the Farmers Markets relaxed setting.

With a big screen T.V. its pretty hard to miss the game. I hear Margarita Monday is a big hit! Make sure youve got an I.D. showing your age of 21!

Movie Night
Dont feel like going out? Check out the local movie listings by calling 255-7676. With three theatres to choose from you should find something. (One theatre only costs $1.50!!!) If you feel like renting check out the Movie Gallery on 27 th street; for around $3.50 you can rent a new release for five days. Youre sure to find one you like due to the amount of new releases they keep on hand, and if not, the helpful staff are always there with suggestions. The coolest thing for a movie night is the new drive-in theatre! Amusement Park DriveIn is an old fashioned concept updated for modern moviegoers. Its a little out of the way, (on the way to Laurel) but worth it for the experience. What you do is get a group in one car (check for carload specials), set your radio to 88.5 FM and enjoy. Call 245-3212 for movies and times. Although its a short list, I hope I gave everyone a few ideas on what to do here in Billings. If you or anyone you know has more ideas on what to do in Billings, e-mail me at retort@msubillings.edu so we know what interests you.

Bowling
Weekends here, take a break! Grab your friends and head down to Center Lanes on 109 North 30 th Street for some bowling. Featuring 12 lanes and a juke box with a pretty nice selection of tunes, it can make for a fun night of knocking down pins. During the week, Center Lanes is open until midnight and on weekends until 2 a.m. Cant bowl? Well, no one can really bowl after a couple cocktails. P.S. They do card for cocktails!!

Bars
Speaking of cocktails Head down to the Montana Brewing Company on Wednesday and Saturday nights for some locally brewed beer at a killer price! Starting at 8 p.m. on Wednesday and 9 p.m. on Saturday pay $2.00 for a Kill the Keg cup and drink until the keg is gone. After a long day at school just make a quick jog across the street to The Rock Pile and enjoy some after test cocktails.

Photo by Melissa DeVries Rock Creek Coffee Roasters provides an open and well lit atmosphere.

Park is that its in walking dis- head down and check out the tance from the school. young up and coming fiddler on the corner or pick up some loHistoric cally grown, fresh veggies from Downtown Hutterite colonies around the Just a straight shot down area. While walking around 27th Street is downtown Billings with its historic buildings which house restaurants and bars as well as apartments and clothing stores. You can find everything you want thats not the run of the mill. Do you need to get out of the computer lab but still need to finish your school work? Grab your laptop and head down to Rock Creek Coffee Roasters on 124 North Broadway. Located in the Babcock Theatre building, the large windows enclosing the shop, high ceilings, and a large amount of space give it a less claustrophobic feeling than most coffee shops Ive been to. Locally owned and operated, they offer free internet service and have a friendly staff to help you. Oh, and the coffee is pretty delicious, too. Downtown Billings is also playing host to 36 full-sized rams and two yearlings. The painted sculptures are located

MSU-B Students Visit London and Tour Japan

The office of International Studies sent two groups of MSUB students overseas this past May. The English Department and the Communications and Theatre Department, in conjunction with the International Studies department, sent a group of 12 students and two faculty to London, England from May 12 to May 27. A group of 12 students and one faculty was sent to the Perfectual University of Kumamoto, Japan from May 10 through June 4. The London trip was centered on a theater experience itinerary, and the Japan trip had a cultural diversity experience basis. The itinerary in London included eight theatrical productions, two activities of the students own choosing, and some free time to explore the city. A discussion session was required after each play. Most of the plays received mixed reviews. The plays that almost everyone agreed were terrible were Theatre of Blood and, surprisingly, Shakespeares The Tempest. Theatre of Blood needed to pick a genre. No one could decide if it was supposed to be a drama, comedy, or a poorly staged horror thing. It was just plain bad. Shakespeares The Tempest was produced in This is how the play would have been performed in Shakespeares day, but if you didnt have a working knowledge of the script it was impossible to follow. The theatrical high point to the whole trip was Shakespeares A Mid Sumworld. Big Ben and Parliament, Westminster Abbey, the London Eye, the Tower of London, the Tower Bridge, Buckingham Palace, and the Royal Albert Hall are just a few of the sites in the city. London also has art galler-

Short Term Study A b r o a d

in 1945, and rebuilt in a more modern design. The Japanese create small gardens around their buildings that are simple but beautiful. Tokyo itself is huge, but has one of the best mass transit systems in the world. The trains run precisely on time, which makes travel in the city easier than it should be for its size. The Buddhist temples at Kyoto are breathtaking, and the group toured a few of these historic monuments. The city is surrounded by lush green hills and ringed with temples. The number of temples and their intricacy became a bit overwhelming and after a time the students became templed out. Kyoto is one of the places in Japan were some of its more ancient history can be explored. The food in Japan is just what you have heard it is. The Japanese eat a good number of raw meat dishes. Sushi and sashimi are Japanese diet staples. Bashasi is a Japanese delicacy that is raw horsemeat. If perhaps the local cuisine isnt to your liking, however, there are always McDonalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, and Shakeys pizza par-

Photo by Paul Jangula. The London Eye and the Saachi Gallery.

mer Nights Dream. The Royal Shakespeare Company performed this play in Shakespeares hometown of Stratford-on-Avon. The acting, sets, special effects, and energy of this production were all flawless. Other plays included; a modern adaptation of Tristan and Yseult, an intimate fringe production, an African dance show, a classic by Noel Coward, and a review show of Ron Moodys (Fagin from the movie Oliver) life. A few of the students ventured out to other theatre productions in London.

Photo by Paul Jangula. The Tower Bridge on the Thames River.

Shakespeares Globe Theatre, which is a reproduction of the theatre Shakespeare himself performed and produced his own works in. Three actors, all men, performed all the parts on a bare stage. They would spin around or don a hat to change characters.

Mary Poppins, the Lion King, and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang all received superior reviews. When not attending plays the students were allowed to explore London. London has some the most famous sites in the

ies and museums with attractions you have heard about in classes and read about in books. The Tate and Tate Modern gallery is one. The Saachi Gallery, that had Salvador Dali and Pablo Picasso exhibits when students were there is another. The Natural History Museum had all of Charles Darwins samples from the Galapagos Islands; the Science Museum had a Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy virtual reality attraction. The British Library has books in Dickens and Yeats own hands, as well as 1,000-yearold Bibles. The British Museum has the bog man, the Elgin Marbles, and the Rosetta Stone. London is a city immersed in a rich extensive history. Japan has a history and culture that can be traced back even further than Englands. Twelve students, under the direction of Scott Harris, got to tour various cities in Japan for three weeks. The purpose for this trip was to experience the similarities and differences between Western and Japanese cultures. The group spent four days in Tokyo, and toured several cities ending at the Perfectual University of Kumamoto where they spent 10 days living with host families. They also got to see the Worlds Fair in Nara, and the Buddhist temples in Kyoto. The architecture in Tokyo isnt anything spectacular. The city was leveled by allied forces

Photo by Julia Barbeau. MSU-B students dressed in traditional Japanes kimonos for the first time.

lor restaurants in close proximity. From London to Japan, MSU-B is educating world travelers. There is no greater learning experience than to immerse yourself in another culture in a faraway place. The International Studies department is planning more trips to exotic places. Analicia Pianca says they are trying to put together a trip to India in the near future, and next summer we go to China. For more information call Ms. Pianca at 657-1705.

An Investigation of Buddy Sex

of his buddy sex situation that, for him, there was no chance of a dating relationship developing. I just Everybodys doing it. It is didnt really want the responsibility having sex and everybody is the of having a girlfriend. All three impression fostered by the media students feel that buddy sex situaand popular culture. Casual sex and tions are very common and occursexual innuendo have become so ring among younger people more prevalent in todays society that frequently. But are both sexes resex-only situations are routinely ally on a level playing field? Are glorified on TV and no one bats an both buddies really satisfied? eye. Monica and Chandler from the Bed buddies and mega-hit Friends began hooking up long before they were actually Biology Men and women are wired difdating. On Sex and the City Carrie tries her luck at having sex like ferent sexually. Although we seem a man while on another episode to come easily enough to an intelthree of the women speak flippantly lectual understanding with regard to about their bed buddies. Whether buddy sex, upholding a physiologilife imitates art or vice-versa, ca- cal bargaining agreement is trickier, sual sex is definitely happening. not only between the partners involved but also internally between And not just on prime time. each individuals body and mind.

Love the One Youre With?

Photo by Tim Stene Sexual mores have always changed from one era to another. -Dr. Hardt, Sociology, MSU-B

Photo by Tim Stene Casual sex may interfere with our ability to derive satisfaction from deep, meaningful relationships. -Dr. Doxey Hatch, Psychology, MSU-B

In his book Be HonestYoure not That Into him Either, sex expert Ian Kerner, Ph. D. says, You Heather*, a sophomore in the can treat sex lightly but it doesnt nursing program at MSU-B said of reciprocate. Dr. Castles, from the her bed buddy, Its better than us- MSU-B Biological and Physical ing a battery powered friend and it Sciences Department tells us, Sex kisses you back. By definition, a causes the release of dopamine (a buddy sex relationship is one where neurotransmitter). Its release is simithe understanding between the two lar to that of a heroin rush. The people is that their situation is for release of this narcotic-like hormone sex only. Typically these partners explains the so-called afterglow and have very little (if any) other in- the mounting desire for more sex. volvement in one anothers lives Womens bodies also release the beyond sex. hormone oxytocin during sex, which Lisa*, a junior in the Health in turn creates feelings of attachment and Human Performance program for her partner. If the person lying at MSU-B, said her situation with beside her is not at least dateable, her bed buddy is a no-strings-at- most women will feel some sense tached relationship. Lisa says she of regret. In a survey of 3,000 became involved with her buddy women that was cited in Kerners because, a girl has her needs. book, only a quarter could have a Photo by Tim Stene John*, a sophomore at the one-night stand without forming an Sex causes the release of dopamine... similar to a heroin rush, -Dr. Castles, MSU-B College of Business says emotional bond and 80 percent of Biology, MSU-B

Real students, real stories

those women also said they would only relationships. Hatch adds, later lament their decisions and When engaging in any sexual behavior, we are probably acting on feel like sluts. Dr. Castles further illumi- impulses that came from our ancesnates the fairly unique human char- tors. Since the physiological reacteristic of copulation for pur- productive contrasts between men poses beyond procreation saying, and women are so drastic (i.e. a Human females are different from mans ability to impregnate many most other species because their women, conceivably in one night, ovulation is hidden. In most ani- while a woman can become pregnant only once mals, the female at a time and by exhibits clear signals when You can treat sex only one man), it may be ratioshe is fertile. lightly but it nalized that caThis partly exsual sex behavplains the tendoesnt ior comes more dency toward reciprocate. naturally to frequent non-re-sex expert men. Perhaps productive sex Ian Kerner, Ph. D, thats part of the among humans. turn on for modPsychology: ern women, the the opportunity to cheat their instincts ultimate mind screw and have sex without consequences (i.e. pregnancy). Nonetheless, Dr. Hatch from the Psycholwomen, speaking strictly from an ogy Department says, From an evolutionary vantage point, invest evolutionary psychology perspecmuch more than men. Because lets tive, its unclear why a woman not forget, of course sex feels great would like to engage in these sexand can facilitate bonding among a

monogamous couple, but its pri- way]. John* said he had a bed buddy because he didnt want the mary function is reproduction. responsibility of a girlfriend but still Sociology and Sex wanted to have sex. John* could From the outlook of society end up with a lot more to be acand casual sex as an indicator of de- countable for if his bed buddy beclining mores, MSU-Billings Soci- came pregnant, especially if she ology professor Dr. Hardt says, In- wanted to keep it. stead of blaming social mores, it is Dr. Hatch suggests, Casual more useful to acknowledge that sex may interfere with our ability sexual mores have always changed to derive satisfaction from deep from one era to another. Hardt meaningful relationships. Dr. goes on to say that an erosion of Castles offers, Maybe our ability mores becomes a sort of societal to resist our biological urges is scapegoat with people idealizing a what makes us human after all. certain historical point and compar- Dr. Hardt says a larger concern ing any perceived change to that than casual sex is the lack of comidealization. Certainly weve come prehensive sex education in this a long way since the 1950s (con- country. sidered by many to be the last good old days) but all that distance has And what does that not necessarily been a downward spell? spiral. Dr. Hardt argues instead, In The Guide to getting it Females are now in a social posi- on Paul Joannides says it best, In tion to demand that their needs and America, sex has been a kind of desires be met in a relationship. Siamese twin with one head being Sometimes women, like Heather*, puritanical and the other hedonisdont want an actual relationship yet tic. Maybe thats how its always still crave skin-to-skin sexual con- been. Maybe thats how it always tact. Today women are empowered will be. Is casual sex a reality to-

Casual Sex Glossary of Terms

Booty call verb or noun (1990s): A phone call, page, text message, instant message, or e-mail undertaken by one party to encourage the other to engage in casual sex, often occurring late at night. While either gender can instigate a booty call, it is most often engaged in by males under the influence of alcohol. In the noun form, the booty call is the one who receives the call and accepts the callers invitation for a sexual liaison. Friend with benefits noun (1990s): An FWB is a friend with whom you may occasionally hook up or have sex but without the deeper commitment of a relationship. The concept was described by Milan Kundera in The Unbearable Lightness of Being as an erotic friendship. An FWB is more meaningful than an average booty call because often the participants were friends first and sex partners later. Bed buddy noun (1980s): A bed buddy is a person with whom another has an ongoing, semi-regular, no-stringsattached casual sex situation. Bed buddies tend to be people with whom you have sex but no other semblance of a relationship No strings attached noun (1970s): Hookups in which both participants are aware that there are no future expectations. Hookup noun (1990s): In the most general terms, a hookup is any sexual act with a person you are not dating or seriously committed to. The hookup encompasses the booty call, the NSA, and the onenight stand. One-night stand noun (1970s): Hooking up with someone for one night of sex with no strings attached with the knowledge that you will never see the person again. A key element of the one-night stand is the conscious decision not to exchange personal information, such as telephone numbers or e-mail addresses. Walk of shame noun (1980s): The post-booty-call walk home, most often undertaken in the same clothing worn the evening before. While the term often refers to a walk across a college campus, it is also a common occurrence in urban areas.

*taken from Be honestYoure not that into him either by Ian Kerner, Ph.D.*

Photo by Tim Stene Eighty percent of people with STDs are symptomless.

to go out here and get it. However, it seems that the mere suggestion that women are attempting to have sex like a man indicates motives beyond sexual urges. Lets face it: men dont aim to have sex like anyone; their aim is simply to fulfill their desires.

Putting it all together

So whats the cost of casual sex? Are we really hurting anyone by taking the proverbial roll in the hay with a person who were not remotely involved with? For some people it may be setting oneself up for disappointment. Lisa* admitted that she doesnt feel that she and her buddy are necessarily on the same page. Lisa* says about dating her buddy, We dont feel that way about each other I guess its more him [who doesnt feel that

day? Yes. What exactly is casual sex all about? Lots of things. Are we as humans attempting to trump biology with contraception use? Yes. Arent women who try to have sex like a man merely asserting their highly evolved postmodern feminist rights? Sure. Does it work? Well, yes, sometimes, it probably does. So just because we can does that mean we should? Yes. And no. The answer is different for everyone. At the very least, hopefully everyone involved in a buddy sex situation has the same answer. After all, in the words of George Michael, Sex is natural/ sex is fun/ sex is best when its one on one.

*names have been changed

MSU-Billings Named Best College for Fifth Time

MSU-BILLINGS NEWS SERVICE - For the sixth consecutive year Montana State UniversityBillings has been ranked as one of the nations Best Colleges by U.S. News and World Report, for undergraduate through masters level academics, in the latest edition of Americas Best Colleges 2005. The rankings will be listed in the August 29 issue, and will be on the newsstands August 22. MSU-Billings achieved the national ranking in the category Best Universities-Masters for the West region third tier of the United States. Only 572 institutions of higher education, both public and private, received national ranking in this category. According to the methodology used by U.S. News & World Report, their ranking system rests on two areas: quantitative measures that education experts have proposed as reliable indicators of academic quality, and on our nonpartisan view of what matters in education, the publishers say. MSU-Billings received high marks in the categories of: Peer ranking (opinions of MSU-Billings as ranked by presidents, academic vice presidents and deans of admissions at colleges and universities throughout the country give MSU-Billings a stellar rating, especially in the area of faculty dedication to teaching); The percent of full-time faculty who have doctoral degrees. Research shows that the more contact satisfied students have with professors, the more they will learn and the more likely it is they will graduate, the publishers say; and, Alumni giving. The percentage of alumni who give to their school is an indirect measure of satisfaction, the publications ranking criteria notes.

Photo from The Retort archives. MSU-B receives top marks.

Students and Faculty to Explore Spirituality

Do you ever wonder what professors believe or whether they maintain faith in the midst of their intellectual pursuits? Or maybe you wonder why people attend church or how they choose which church to attend. Or maybe you would like to consider how Christianity is being influenced by other belief systems, such as Judaism or Islam. If so, the fall conference, Feeding Our Spiritual Hunger: Religious Trends in Montana Today is right for you The conference is being hosted by United Campus Ministry on Friday, September 23 from 7 p.m. 9 p.m. and Saturday, September 24 from 9 a.m. 3 p.m. This event will feature Dr. Patricia Killen, director of the Center for Religion, Culture and Society in the Western United States at Pacific Lutheran University. She will be joined by Dr. Vincent Miller, author of Consuming Religion: Christian Faith and Practice in a Consumer Culture as well as members of the MSU-Billings faculty. Topics for discussion inspectful dialogue. Were taught not to talk about religion and politics. But we can learn so much when we listen to others and allow ourselves to be influenced by what they believe. We need to be open and communicative about where we stand and how it applies to our daily living. Another purpose of the event is to encourage connections between academic and faith-based pursuits. No matter how we feel about religion, Treglown states, the reality is that our society today is greatly influenced by reliGraphic courtesy of UCM. gion. We cant ignore that. I believe its best if we understand influences impacting churches the forces that are work and talk and communities in Montana about them. The conference will be held today, and for pondering the fuin the Ballroom of the Student ture of religion in America. According to one United Union Building, and is open to Campus Ministry board mem- all MSU-Billings students, facber and event organizer, Rev. ulty and staff, as well as persons Gary Treglown, one purpose of from the Billings community. the conference is to foster re- There is no cost to attend. They Mean to Me with panelists Tasneem Khaleel, Deborah Schaffer, and Lisa Kemmerer; and Are Denominations Relevant with insights from the keynote presenters and denominational representatives. The conference will provide an opportunity for exploring the

Ucm hosts fall conference.

clude, How do you as an Intellectual Connect Traditional Faith and Contemporary Knowledge with panelists John Cech, Michael Dennis, Doxey Hatch, Russ Lord and Matt McMullen; Cross-Cultural Spiritual Perspectives: My Beliefs and Practices and What

summer, mostly thefts. People! Always lock up your bikes! Seriously, there were several Welcome back! Im hop- bikes stolen from campus this ing everyone had a fabulous summer, and with the price of summer, I know I did. I hope gas skyrocketing as it is, those everyone stayed relatively out bicycles are damn important. of trouble, as well, though I do There were a couple of know how fun it is to bend the episodes of disorderly conduct rules from time to time. on campus in late June, and a Anyway, we had a few license plate was stolen from troubles on campus this past the parking lot of the College

of Education building. The most prominent problem on campus centered mainly in the parking garage and involved a lot of graffiti. It apparently seems to be the work of one particular group. Finally, someone stole a fire extinguisher from the library on August 8. On one last note, please be aware that if you are trav-

eling on campus at night, Security is only a phone call away if you wish to have an escort. The number is 6762147. Anyone with any questions or concerns about campus security can access the Jeanne Clery Disclosure of Campus Security Policy and Campus Crime Statistics Act at www.msubillings.edu/security.

Getting Hip to the Club Scene at MSU-B

You dont even have to be 21! Have you ever filled out a job application and after highlighting your colorful academic career written a large N/A on the line for extracurricular activities? Or worse, did you leave it blank entirely? At those times have you made a mental note to get more involved and then neglected to follow through on such occasions? If you answered yes to any of these questions let me remind you: the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. But dont worry, Im here to help. You may be surprised to learn there are approximately 45 active clubs and organizations on campus. Even more surprising to some of you is that you might already belong to one. And most surprising of all is that there truly is something for (almost) everyone. The RHA (Residence Hall Association) consists of every student living in the dorms. The RHA plans activities and provides social support, as well as addressing concerns and implementing change. If youre already a member you may consider applying for one of the officiary positions available right now. Contact Jimie Marchwick-Wix at 657-2669 for more information. MSU-B also hosts a variety of religious clubs. There are interdenominational organizations such as United Campus Ministry, and Chi Alpha Christian Fellowship. Both tory Societies, Sigma Tau Delta (Engroups provide support and oppor- glish) and Phi Alpha Theta (History). tunities for students to connect spiri- These organizations are for those tually. Weekly meetings are held, who are intrigued by either field and along with Bible study and less for- seek leadership opportunities. Stumal recreational gatherings. UCM dents who belong to these clubs are especially encourages intellectual connected to a nationwide support examination of Biblical and aca- network of colleagues and mentors. demic teachings within a non-judg- Internships and scholarships are thus mental Christian environment. Chi more accessible to members. Alpha and The StuUCM also dent Nursing coordinate Association is a with the place for preother relinursing and g i o u s nursing students groups, like to meet others Catholic within the proCampus gram and help Ministry, for raise awareness fundraising to health conand voluncerns. Informateer work. tion Technology Graphic by Nicole Livermont. Because of Various clubs around campus. Club, through their comthe College of bined resources, the campus minis- Business, attracts a lot of marketing tries have facilitated many success- and business management majors ful outreach projects around the along with computer technology macommunity and beyond. jors. IT Club hosts sessions on buildOr perhaps youve always ing personal computers, judges high seen yourself on the stage even if school competitions, and sponsors its behind the curtain. The Drama entertainment activities on campus. Committee encompasses all aspects Accounting Club and Marketing of stage production. Anyone inter- Club are two more highly specialested in costumes, set design, light- ized organizations here at MSU-B. ing, or acting would enjoy this club. The predominantly leftRandy Pugh in the communications brained among us, may find their department can provide further in- niche in the Art Students League, struction. Potters Guild, or even (shameless Not unique to our campus plug) at the Retort. The Percussion are the honorary English and His- Club is a credit-earning ensemble whose purpose is to share music in the Billings area while simultaneously broadening its members musical horizons. A few special interest organizations also make homes on our campus. PRIDE is for the support of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender students, as well as the promotion of equality in the community. MSU-B NORML (National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws) focuses on educating the public and lobbying to change existing drug regulations. Smaller groups, like these, are more likely to fall into a vicious cycle of low involvement. Because of too few members, activities are infrequent, events are sporadic, and therefore the smaller clubs fail to attract new members. Organizations like the above may cease to exist entirely without a marked increase in support and involvement. If you dont see your interests here, stop by the Student Organization Expo on September 8 from 11 a.m. to1 p.m. in the SUB Galleria. Also, from the MSU-B Current Students home page, click Get Involved On Campus for a more complete list of organizations on campus. Finally, if you still havent found a club that appeals to you, start your own! Stop by the SUB room 219 and fill out an intent to organize form. All you need is five willing students and a faculty or staff advisor, and you are on your way. So what are you waiting for?

Danas Picks

1. The Silence of the Lambs 2. Psycho (The original) 3. Reservoir Dogs 4. Boondock Saints 5. The Eye (Japanese Import)

1pm Womens Soccer@COT 6pm Ultimate Frisbee @MSU-B 7pm Poetry Night@Art Space* Margarita Monday@Rockpile*

5:30pm Paradigm plays & FREE BBQ on Campus Lawn 5:30 Open Mic Night@Rock Creek Cofee Roasters* 7:05pm Mustangs Game@Cobb Field

1pm Womens Soccer@COT 7pm Venture Theatre@Stingers 8pm MSU-B Night at the Drive-In

11am-5pm Oktoberfest@Riverside Park in Laurel 3pm & 7pm In the Mood@ABT

7pm Volleyball@Alterowitz

Timothy Stene

Age: 20 Hometown: Joliet Major: History Minor: Undecided Dream job: Richest Business CEO in the world Top of celebrity make out list: Sara Jessica Parker Famous person youd most like to kick the crap out of : Bono Recurring nightmare: Bono chasing me trying to use his sunglasses as a boomerang. Photo by Niki Porter. About your photo: Word, Bono!

Age: 25 Hometown: Battle Mountain, NV Major: Mass Comm. Minor: History Dream job: Pushing Carts at Costco. No stress involved in that. Top of celebrity make out list: Matthew McConaughey Famous person youd most like to kick the crap out of: Paris Hilton, she bugs. Recurring nightmare: The restaurant keeps filling up and I cant get to all the tables and people are getting mad. Its awful. About your photo: Say cheese!

Melissa DeVries

Photo by Tim Stene

Sporkman

by Dan Hansen

7pm Foreign Film Night@Parmly Library 7pm Writers Voice@YMCA* 8pm Projectile Comedy@Railyard* 8pm Everyday Sunday plays@Double Edge

8pm Open Mic Night@Double Edge*

8am - 12pm Farmers Market Downtown 9pm Kill the Keg@Brew Pub*

5pm Final Midweek Farmers Market Classes Begin 7:05pm Mustangs Game@Cobb Field 9pm Kill the Keg@Brew Pub*

11am-1pm Student Org Expo@SUB 7:05pm Mustangs Game@Cobb Field 7:30pm Willie Nelson@ Shrine Auditorium 8pm Comedian@Petro Theatre

8pm Open Mic Night@Double Edge 8pm I Love You, Youre Perfect, Now Change@Venture Theatre

1pm Womens Soccer@COT 7pm Open Mic Night@Wheat* Montana 7:30pm Billings Symphony@ABT 8pm I Love You, Youre Perfect, Now Change@Venture Theatre

8pm REO Speedwagon & Styx @Metrapark

7pm Foreign Film Night@Parmly Library

7pm Volleyball@Alterowitz

1pm MT State Chili Cookoff Downtwon 2pm Volleyball @Alterowitz

1pm Mens Soccer@COT

9-11pm Free Hep A & B Vaccination; Free HIV and Hep C testing @Caseys

7pm Volleyball@Alterowitz

Saturday Live@Pioneer Park 1pm Womens Soccer@COT 7pm Volleyball@Alterowitz 10am-1pm Oktoberfest@Riverside Park in Laurel

7:30 pm Footloose and I Love You, Youre Perfect, Now Change@Venture Theatre

7:30 pm Footlo0se and I Love You, Youre Perfect, Now Change@Venture Theatre

4:30-10:30pm Ales for Trails@Brew Pub 8pm Dervish@ABT

*Denotes Weekly Event

Back to School Word Find Warning: Excessive

Gaming Can Kill You!

True story: Some guy in South Korea died from playing 49 hours of the computer game Starcraft. Nothing like God helping in the confirmation that, yes, you are a loser. The guy, who was later identified as Lee, didnt eat or drink anything the whole time and had a makeshift bed made at the internet caf where he was playing. It struck me as sad when after three days the only person who was worried about the 28-year-old gamer was his mother, whom he still lived with. Even then, why did it take three days for her to wonder where he was? Its not like he was at work; Lee had already been fired from his job for missing work. Why was Lee missing work? you ask. If you guessed to play Starcraft, you are correct! When his mother got a hold of an ex co-worker, they tracked him down to the caf where they talked him into taking a break and right when he was about to quit, this unlucky cuss collapsed from exhaustion! The gamer later died in a hospital of what the doctors presume was a heart attack. So gamers beware; if your friends have forgotten what you look like and you just got fired from your job, youre probably going to die in the next month. Have a nice day!

Graphic courtesy of http:// utopia.duth.gr/

Countryman Should Have Kept It Country

Would anyone want to listen to Bob Marley sing Whiskey River? Probably not and unfortunately, most people will not want to listen to Willie Nelson sing reggae. If one does ignore their gut feeling about Willie singing reggae and chooses to buy his CD Countryman, they will realize that most times the gut is right. Unlike most reggae that comes from political, social and economic oppression, in conjunction with smoking tons of primo pot, Nelsons sounds like the reggae button on a synthesizer with a country singer and a guitar up front. By the third cut when the discomfort begins to wear off, producer Don Was brings in reggae artist Toots Hibbert for a duet with Nelson to Johnny Cashs Im a Worried Man. This only serves to remind us what a reggae singer truly sounds like and leaves us longing for more of the real deal. The listening experience is almost enjoyable when Nelson overlays reggae beats to his own tunes in Ive Just Destroyed the World and Something to think About, however, it adversely leaves the listener wanting a real old-fashioned Willie CD that fans have loved for so many years. Countryman was originally recorded 10 years ago. Perhaps it is one of those artistic endeavors that should have been left in the vault. It is well understood that artists get put into categories and at some point try to grow beyond them, but one would hope that somebody might realize that all growth is not necessary to sell to an already adoring fan base. It would be entertaining to hear Willie sing a few

Cover art by Craig Allen

reggae tunes around a fire or in a smoky bar, but Countryman feels commercialized and untrue to reggae as well as Nelson. Honestly, if you are a die-

hard Nelson fan and you listen to this CD 10 or 11 times, it will grow on you and it will be bearable, until you pop in Buffalo Soldier.

The Great Raid Isnt So Great

In 1941 Japanese forces invaded and captured the Philippines. U.S. forces there retreated to the Batan Peninsula, and were captured. General Douglas MacArthur vowed to return to rescue his troops. The Japanese forced the soldiers to march 60 miles to the site of their prisoner of war camp. It became known as the Batan Death March. Fifteen-hundred soldiers were killed on the march. Its still remains the largest single loss the U.S. military has ever suffered. The Great Raid, starring James Franco, Connie Nielsen, Joseph Fiennes, and Benjamin Bratt, brings to the screen the the planning of the raid to the day after. The events are historically accurate, and the books used as source material are even cited in the end credits. An internal power struggle within the officers ranks of the Army, and a time and distance romance are added as plot devices for the movie. The Great Raid would have been a better documentary for the History Channel than feature film. The pace of the movie is very slow. The romance and power struggles take three-quarters of the film to develop. The planning of the raid and the travel time to the POW camp take just as long. I believe the director, John Dahl, did this on purpose to Graphic courtesy of www.ioncinema.com / beta/movie.php?id=690 give the audiences sense of what events of the POWs rescue after their three-year internment in the Japanese prison camp. The story takes place over five days, from time is like in a POW camp. Making your audience feel like they are trapped in a place were time crawls by is not a way to keep them on the edge of their seats. The raid itself contains all the explosions, blood splurting, and flailing bodies audiences have come to expect in movies today. This sequence is about 10 minutes long, and after the hour and a half wait seems rushed. This is a great movie if youre a history buff. The film would be great source material for a history report or a public speaking speech. If youre looking for an action packed thrill ride, go to the penguin movie. There has got to be more happening in it.

How I Spent my Summer Vacation

For most students, summer vacation is a time to relax, go on trips, and work on your tan. There are no worries except the inevitable, that summer would come to an end and youd have to start hitting the books again. That is, for most students. Reminiscing about my own summer vacation I realized that all I did was work. My only fear was that Id be stuck waiting tables for the rest of my life, and couldnt wait for school to start again. Realizing how sick this sounded I have decided that next summer Im going to be relaxing on a trip with a great tan. With this in mind I asked some fellow MSU-B students what exciting or memorable experiences they had this summer and it sounds like they really know how to enjoy their free time.

Name: Kyok Yadori & Mai Name: Brian White Name: Joe Godfrey Okuba Year: Senior Year: Sophomore Year: both Sophomores Major: Marketing ManageMajor: Business Management Hometown: Worland, WY Major: English, Administra- ment tion Hometown: Anchorage, AK Most memorable moment? Hometown: Kumamoto, JaMost memorable moment? Seeing the Horrorpops at the pan Most memorable moment? I went to school all summer Being trapped in the freight and worked maintenance up here at Warped Tour in Bozeman. Most memorable moment? To come to Montana. We saw elevator with Scott. It was awful! the school. Yellowstone, Montana Fair, and Crow Fair. It was very different from Japan!

Name: Amber Keltner Year: Sophomore Major: Art Education Hometown: Laurel, MT

Hound OK if You Didnt Sell Your Dog

When I showed up to my very first reading at Peaks to Plains Park on Sunday, June 26, I encountered several men dressed in hunters orange windbreakers with the words Poop Patrol scrawled across the back. Not sure if this was some new boy band or whatever I continued on to a crowd where about 15-20 people gathered, most with dogs on leashes. Oh, expletive, I thought to myself, Im definitely in the wrong place. Pam Houstons reading from her novel Sight Hound was the concluding event of the MSU-B High Plains Bookfest. Id never even heard of Houston at the time and was only attending because of the prodding of a favorite professor. I didnt know that the event would serve as a reminder of my recent failed attempt at adopting a dog into my own life. Whatever. Sight Hound is the story of Dante and his soul mate Rae. Dante voices are pieced together scrapbook. I think thats what is an organic meat lover, Eastern re- seamlessly and read like flipping Houston is really going for here. ligion scholar, and a three-legged through the pages of a friends Its a story of how the relationships wolfhound. Rae, of course, in our lives are at is his owner. The story meonceordinary and profound. anders through Dantes ulIts about the way the rocks timately losing battle with shape the river and the river osteosarcoma and winds in shapes the rocks. Its a and out of Raes private war book reminding us that no and triumph over her pessiman is an island and that mism and self-fulfilling dogs are people too. And prophecies. Narration of the although the message is anbook is unusual in that its a cient the telling is all origirelay carried out winningly nal. During the reading I acby 12 unique voices: two tually got chills, you know canine, one feline and nine the kind that are sometimes human. Rae is a no-nonborn of creative energy, sense playwright who says though I never felt that way the F word without apolwhile reading it on my own. ogy. Howard is her neurotic I may have liked the book actor-boyfriend. Rose is more if I still had my dog, the next dog, a bimbo if I hadnt been wrestling whose best feature is her with guilt, but I dont and I looks. Dr. Evans is Dantes was. Maybe I am a dog perveterinarian and Theo is son. Just not yet. Either Raes shrink. way, Im just not a love The collection of char- Jacket design by Base Art Co./ Photos by Pam Houston story/dog book person. acters and their distinct and Charles Benes Now or ever.

Scraping the Barrel: Off to the Racist

As many of you may (or may not) know, the NCAA has instituted a provision barring college athletic teams with NativeAmerican mascots, deemed hostile, abusive and derogatory, from hosting postseason events and displaying the woefully offensive logos of said sports teams. Give me a break. For some odd reason, those of Native American decent are offended that teams at all levels of competition, from Jerk Water, Arkansas Middle School clear to the NFL, NHL, MLB, etc., etc., are blatantly mocking the culture and tradition of a proud demographic that plays such a vital and integral role in this great countrys history. Call me callous, but boo-freakin-hoo.. News flash, people. I dont hate or mock the Washington Redskins because of the teams logo. I hate and mock the Washington Redskins because they suck, plain and simple. (Oh, imagine that. Mark Brunell sacked again. What a shocker.) You might think Im insensitive, but I wouldnt be bitching if the New Orleans Saints or California Angels had a guy dressed up like Pope Benedict break-dancing at the fifty-yard line or pitchers mound during time-outs. We dont see bunch of pirates picketing the Tampa Bay Buccaneers training camp calling for Jon Gruden and Brian Greise to walk the plank. There are actually very few forest rangers showing up to Soldier Field to whine about the misrepresentation of bears in the NFL, and Im sorry if the Cleveland Indians mascot looks like a tool. But if anybody of any cultural affiliation judges a certain group of people by these obvious parodies, chances are they have three teeth in their heads and wear velcro shoes because they are too stupid to tie their Reeboks and should be ignored anyway. I was asked once would I feel the same way if there were a team called the Omaha Crackers. Yes, I would. Tell you what, Ill do you one better. Well call them the Omaha Redneck Honky White Trash Motherf#@$ers. Their logo can be a rusty 86 Camaro up on blocks in front of a beat-up doublewide. They can be in the same division with the Kansas City Chiefs, the Compton Drive-Bys, and the Albuquerque Border Jumpers. Better yet, well put them all in one town so all the bleeding heart whiners dont have

I dont care where your people came form, what awful (or great) things your forefathers did, or if your old man scored six touchdowns for Polk High in a single game. I treat everyone equally, until you piss me off. THEN I discriminate against you, because you deserve it. I dont buy into the nave B.S. of judging a man, woman or child because of their heritage. When Great, Great Grandfather Schrage came to this country in the late 1800s, he was far too busy being a poor, uneducated Kraut to hold anybody down, black, white, Native American. While Im sickened by the thought of attempted genocide on a group of people who wanted nothing less than peace, while the very thought of Manifest Destiny as an excuse for murder churns my stomach, I refuse to to drive 600 miles to bitch and hand apologize and damned well will not out fliers. I know who I am, I know feel responsible for events decades who my family is, and I know what before my birth. is worth fighting for. Im not an InAll I can do is hope that my dian-American, African-American, beloved Green Bay Packers destroy Mayan-American or whatever. Im the Tampa Bay Bucs come Week an American. I draw the line there. Four. Because I hate pirates.

Hello From Deutschland: Love Knows No Borders

German girl and trying desperately to be close to her, while at the same time taking my education to new levels. If for a moment I could have It has been two and a half seen myself from anothers perspecyears since that night and I am only tive I could only have explained the weeks away from embarking on an look in my eyes as blindness. I had exciting adventure that could very failed to see the ridiculousness of the well change the course of my life. situation. At three oclock in the It has taken a lot to make it morning, I had to borrow my band happen both emotionally and acamates broken down 1981 Subaru to demically. In preparing to make my drive to the house where the girl that journey there were a few hurdles to would change my life forever was overcome. First, I started with a visit staying. to the Office of International StudMy name is Lyle Johnson II. I ies. There I was helped by two ream a student at MSU-Billings and I markable people. They made the am preparing myself for a year of process and paperwork understandstudy in Germany. My decision to do able and easy. Also, they directed so was sparked by a German girl. She me to exchange students that were helped to light the fire of curiosity studying at MSU-Billings. They inside me to see the world. come from all over the world to our There I was, stumbling in the it as she left for the airport that mornschool. The German students pronight, making my way to her win- ing to fly back to Germany. vided me with valuable information So with a rose and a torn out secdow to confess my feelings. I soon and advice. While the students from realized I had no idea what I was go- tion of paper bag, I laid down the path other countries gave me insight to ing to say. I reverted to plan B. You to where I am today. In love with a see, I was a little nervous about her reaction to this hopelessly romantic endeavor. We had only met a few days earlier at the wedding of mutual friends. I decided I would leave a note on her door step, sure she would find the different kinds of cultural situations I might be confronted with. Also, I had to make sure that the language barrier was not going to be too overwhelming. Sitting in on German classes and listening to language CDs is how I have obtained my modest German vocabulary. Tuition is the same as attending school at MSU-Billings. But while I am in Germany I will need money to travel with and use for everyday expenses. I have been working in my spare time and saving extra money. Finally and most importantly, mentally I have to prepare myself for the new culture that is to become my home for the next 11 months. I will be away from my family and friends and also, I will be deprived of Mountain Dew. In preparing, it was relatively easy to get everything worked out considering what was to come of it. All in all it was an adventure preparing myself for the adventure.

Residential Life, What to Do?

For the incoming students that live in the dorms, you may find yourself asking What is there to do here? Such a problem is solved by the Residential Housing Association (RHA). The RHA is a club that meets on a weekly basis to plan and coordinate events for the residents in the dorms. The members work with the RAs and H o u s i n g St a ff i n t h e dorms as desk workers, and fund raisers for the events and socials that are held during the semesters.

pizza parties, bands putting on concerts, ice cream socials and scavenger hunts. What does it take to be in RHA? All current residents are encouraged to be involved in the dorm events and activities. To be an o ff i c e r i n t h e c l u b , a n application and interview is necessary to do so. When and if hired, training and preparation is undertaken to be ready to take on the halls for this semester. RHA encourages involvement in the dorms and to take part in the club itself. The club goes through great measures and strides to help students enjoy their stay. The members care for the residents and are willing to assist any way they can.

Leadership is created and perfected in this club. Planning events, taking responsibility and coordinating projects are a few demands that this club requires. P r o j e c t s h a v e included trips to the hospital, creating care baskets for the less Graphic courtesy of fortunate and elderly, and oak.cats.ohiou.edu/.../ doing book drives for pictures/biglogo.jpg various shelters. Not only thrived ever since. is this club appreciated by B e s i d e s m e e t i n g n e w the community, but it also people, one of the best gives self-satisfaction to all parts about this club is that the active members. e v e r y o n e i s a l e a d e r.

The Retort, March 5, 1971, Vol. 24, Issue 20

Circle K, What is it?

Circle K is a co-educational charitable service, leadership development and friendship organization, that is established by the Kiwanis club. The Key Club, Builders Club, KKids, and Aktion Club are also similar to Circle K and are also sponsored by Kiwanis Club. These clubs are self-governing organizations that have the mission to develop college and university students into responsible citizens and leaders with a lifelong commitment to serving the children of the world. Circle K was established at MSUB during Fall 2004. Kevin Majewski has been an active member and founder of this club, and is currently president of the organization. Cicle K has

Graphic courtesy of MSU-B RHA

Welcome Week is the first event of many for the school year. This event is held on the first week of school, which is from September 4 to Saturday, September 11. To help with the adjusting process, Welcome Week will include events such as Ultimate Frisbee,

Police consider how to restrain an unidentified women (arrow) who ran nude through pre-registration crowds at EMC for several hours until she disappeared. Officers were repeatedly beaten back by male spectators when they attempted to arrest the woman.

Sporkman

by Dan Hansen

Yellowjacket Athletics: They are A Changing

If change is inevitable as they say, a big batch of inevitability is on the menu for MSU-Billings athletics this year. The Yellowjackets will be in a new conference: the Heartland; introduce (or more correctly reintroduce) baseball; and three teams will have new coaches. Texas, University of the Incarnate Word and St Marys University, both of San Antonio, as well as Lincoln University of Jefferson City Missouri, Oklahoma Panhandle State University, and Western New Mexico University. Conference Champions will earn automatic NCAA tournament bids in Volleyball, Mens and Womens C r o s s C o u n t r y, M e n s a n d Womens Basketball, Mens and Womens Tennis, Mens and Womens Golf, Softball and Baseball. sistant coach at Bemidji and a coach and player at Jamestown College in North Dakota. It is always a challenge to start a new program from the ground up says Brown. But so far with the support from the college and the recruiting we have been able to do- especially the two dozen Montanans- we have scratch and see it progress the way it did. I will especially miss being around student-athletics of this caliber, both on the field and in the classroom. I speak not just of my softball team but of the entire athletic department. Taking over for Amuend, at least in the interim while a national search is conducted, is longtime assistant

Jackets Firmly Planted in the Heartland

MSU-Billings announced plans to end its 13 year affiliation with the Pac-West Conference and to join the Heartland last February following a four month series of negotiations. This is the result of good faith efforts by many people, said MSU-B athletic director Dr. Gary Gray adding I believe the Heartland is happy to have us because we are a long standing member of NCAA Division II and we are glad to join the Heartland and its many outstanding programs. Echoing Grays sentiments was Heartl a n d C o m m i s s i o n e r To n y Stigliano saying We are very excited to have MSU-Billings join our league. It has proven itself a worthy member of Division II over the years and will be a competitive addition to the Heartland, both athletically and academically. The Heartland Confer-

National Pastime Returns to Campus

February was a busy month for MSU-B athletics. In addition to the change in leagues the University announced that baseball was coming back to campus as an intercollegiate sport for the first time since what was then known as Eastern Montana College suspended its program in 1974. The Billings community has an unbelievably strong baseball heritage and we believe that the reemergence of a college baseball program at MSU-Billings fit nicely into that tradition, says Chancellor Dr. Ron Sexton. Selected to head the revived Yellowjacket program is Chris Brown. Brown comes to MSU-Billings following a stint as head coach at Bemidji State in Minnesota,

Photo courtesy of the Billings Mustangs. Cobb Field soon to be home of MSU-Billings Baseball.

added to the roster things seem to be on track. The first MSU-Billings baseball game is tentatively scheduled for February 18, 2006 at Colorado Christian University while the home opener is slated for March 17, when the Yellowjackets face Northwest Nazarene in a Doubleheader at Cobb Field.

New Faces

In addition to Brown coming to lead the baseball program, four other teams at MSU-Billings are experiencing coaching transitions this year. Dan McNally takes over the Mens Soccer program (for more see mens soccer preview), while on the softball diamond Jeff Amuend departs MSU-Billings for the Division I program at Charleston (S.C.) Southern University. About his tenure at MSU-Billings, which spanned the proPhoto by Megan Sturlaugson. grams first five seasons culJacket Cheer squad winners of COA Division II of 2004 and 2005. minating in last years third ence, in addition to MSU-Bill- where over the course of two place finish at the NCAA West ings, is comprised of Dallas seasons he led the Beavers to a Regional, Amuend says It B a p t i s t U n i v e r s i t y, St . combined 29-63 overall record. was an awesome challenge to Edwards University of Austin, Before that Brown was an as- s t a r t t h i s p r o g r a m f r o m

coach Sean McGary Two head coaching positions remain unfilled. Mens Golf Head Coach Roger Burckley resigned in June citing the fact, I have two young boys now and I cant afford to be on the road 60 days a year. Burckley added, I really hope they bring in a good coach because I am excited for the team this year. We had a good recruiting class and the veterans were really making noticeable improvements at the end of last year. Meanwhile Cheerleading head coach Dani Ruoff has left to take a similar position at MSU-Bozeman. Ruoff is best known for bringing the Yellowjacket cheer team up to regional and national competitive standards, winning the Cheerleaders of America Division II competition in 2004 and 2005. Ruoff also conducted a yearly cheerleading camp that has in the last few years become the largest stunt camp in Montana. Athletic Department officials hope to have both positions filled by the start of school on September 7.

Volleyball: Looking to Fulfill Expectations

fidence we just might make some noise in our league, said head After posting a 14-10 record coach Paulasi Matavo. last year, the first winning camAhead of MSU-Billings in paign in the programs 21 year that preseason poll are; at No. 1, history, the MSU-Billings last years Heartland champions, Yellowjackets Volleyball team is St. Edwards University, No. 2 is Western New Mexico who finished second in the Pac West Conference last year, and at No. 3, St Marys University. Picked to finish out of the playoff hunt are; at No. 5 , University of the Incarnate Word, No. 6, Dallas Baptist University, and at No. 7, Oklahoma Panhandle State. While many years of Pac West competition make the Western New Mexico Photo by Scott W. McCluere of The Arka Tech program a known Alicia Cazemier goes up for a block during a quantity, the game at the Arkansas Tech Invite. Yellowjackets will be seeing other Heartseeking another first: a trip to land Schools for the first time this postseason play. If the prognos- season. I really dont know what tications of the preseason Heart- to expect, says Matavo. Hisland Conference coaches poll, in torically St. Edwards and St. which the Jackets are picked to Marys have been the toughest finish fourth, become fact they teams in the conference but will just make the conference games arent played on paper. tourney. I think that if we get Going forward into this unoff to a good start in our early known is a comparatively young tournaments and build some con- squad of eight players, led by returnees junior outside hitters Jes- as they head out to Dillon for four sica Bratton and Alexis Sandru, more games as part of the UMjunior setter Natalie Bills and Western Tournament. The home opener for the Sophomore Alicia Cazemier. Rounding out the roster are jun- Yellowjackets comes on September ior outside hitter/right side Ali 16 when the Rattlers of St. Marys Watson, who transfers to MSU- pay a visit to Alterowitz Gym. Billings from Sheridan College Game time is 7 p.m. The same two (Wyo.), sophomore libero/defen- teams will square off the following sive specialist Nicole Kruse, who day at 2 p.m. The following weektransfers from MSU-Northern, end, September 23-24, it is the and two freshmen: setter Taylor Western New Mexico Mustangs Faught (Billings West) and right who visit the Magic City, game time setter/middle blocker Jessica both nights is 7 p.m. Lechner (Huntley Project). Our returnees came back in pretty good shape, said Matavao. Early practice has been good. The kids returning know what they went through last year. We are just trying to get the new kids to fit into the areas where they will help us. T h e Yellowjackets already had eight games under their belt as they traveled to tournaments at Arkansas Tech and the Colorado School of Mines. MSU-B Photo by Scott W. McCluere of The Arka Tech. returns to action Sophomore Nicole Kruse serves it up. September 9 and 10

Mens Soccer Aims For Class Both On and Off Field

Although conveying a positive attitude, new head m e n s s o c c e r c o a c h D a n McNally knows not to expect any quick fixes. McNally is taking over a program that seeks to recover from the graduation of last years senior class, a group that accounted for 18 of the Yellowjackets 24 goals during the 2004 campaign. We are in a rebuilding mode and that takes time, says McNally. A native of Darwen in northwest England, former NAIA all-American at Embry Riddle Aeronautical University and top assistant coach at Nova Southeastern, McNally brings with him something that appeared to be lacking in recent years: a sense of direction as to where the MSU-B mens soccer is headed. He says, I want to build a program that aims to be competing with class on the field and establishes a positive reputation on campus and in the wider community. On the field the Jackets will look to senior goalkeepers Jess Feltman and Yacine Zerizef as well as senior defensemen Patrick Boltz and Jesse Spann (team captain) to shore up a defense that allowed 44 goals last season, leaving the Jackets with a disappointing plus/minus number of -20. I feel personally that in order to turn the program around, its essential to create a defensive philosophy and an understanding of what were trying to achieve on defense. McNally told MSU-Billings sports information, Well pick the best system to fit the players we have. On offense the Jackets will look for some of their 13 newcomers, including transfer forward Travis Polson, who scored seven goals for Walla Walla Community College (Wash.) last year, to supplement the group of returning players including Spann, Defenseman Josh Hernandez, Midfielder Marcus Riley and Forwards Matt DHont and Dustin Kono (who scored the six goals not tallied by the seniors last season.) This year I want to be creative and counter attacking on offense, Says McNally. The season began on Aug. 20 with an exhibition game against North Idaho College. The Jackets played the Cardinals to a 1-1 draw with the NIC goal coming in the first half off an errant deflection by Spann that somehow got by Feltman for an own goal while MSU-B evened things up a goal by Boltz with just under two minutes left in the game. The regular season then commenced with road trips to Denver to play Metro State and the Colorado School of Mines and to Salt Lake for the Westminster College Tournament. MSU-B will be back in action September 10 and 11 traveling to Bismarck for a neutral site game against University of Sioux Falls and to visit the University of Mary. The Home Opener for the Yellowjackets will be Wednesday, September 21 as MSU-B takes on new Heartland Conference foe The University of the Incarnate Word. Kickoff is slated for 1 p.m. at the College of Technology Field, located at Central Ave. and Shiloh Rd.

Womens Soccer: Looking Ahead, Not Back

Coming off the most successful season in the programs history (12-4-3, 10th in the last DII West Region Poll), it would be natural for head coach Don Trentham and company to sit back and expect good things to continue coming their way. That is not the approach the Lady Yellowjackets are taking. We are not talking about last year much, said Trentham, who enters his fourth year as head coach. This year is a new year with a new team and a whole new set of challenges. On the top of that list of new challenges is the fact that MSU-Billings joins a new conference, the Heartland, and a new region, the Midwest. While not considered by those who know college soccer as tough a region as the West, Trentham is weary to say his team has a ticket punched to the conference or regional tournament. Saying, It (the Midwest region) may not be seen to be as tough, but in our league we have St. Edwards, who finished in the regional top 10 last year, and the regional number one Metro State (Denver) who went on to win the national championship. So there are top caliber programs in the region. On the field the Jackets will carry a roster of 24 players (13 returnees and 11 freshmen), including four goalkeepers. Missing from last year are four starters lost to graduation including two, Margot Merrill-Johnson and Photo by Bryce Skjervem Candy Cherry, who started all 70 Forward Brittney Sandau is games of their collegiate careers. expected to be an increased offensive Trentham told MSU-Billings sports presence for a Yellowjacket team information that despite the seeming leadership vacuum this might create the Jackets are doing just fine. He also stated, If you look at our team now you see a lot of players who have been starters since they were freshmen. Those are players, all juniors now, who have started almost every game for the past two years. We still have midfieldersAlly Stroup (Co-Captain), Kelsey Vinnedge, goalkeeper Megan Plank (Co-Captain), and forward Alyssa Wolfer. I Photo by Bryce Skjervem. think we have the players who can Team Captain Megan Plank will be a step into that leadership role. critical defensive anchor for the Stroup, Vinnedge, and Wolfer, Yellowjacket team along with sophomores Brittney Sandau and Abby Bennett, are likely to provide the main thrust of the Jackets offensive attack. Anchoring the defense in front of Plank will be the teams only senior Lacey Albrent in her second season with MSU-B, after transferring from Ventura County Community College (Calif.). Before beginning the regular season last week with games at Midwest region opponents CSU-Pueblo, Fort Lewis College and Mesa State College, The Jackets hosted two year school North Idaho College in an exhibition game. Five first half goals including three from Wolfer, were all the scoring needed as MSU-B shut out the Cardinals 5-0. MSU-Billings next home game will be September 5 as the Jackets open Heartland Conference play against the Rattlers of St. Marys University. Kickoff at the College of Technology Field (Central Ave. and Shiloh Rd.) is set for 1 p.m. September 10 and 11 MSU-B will be back in action hosting two NAIA opponents, The University of Mary (N.D.) on Saturday, and the University of Great Falls on Sunday.

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Shadow Box

Fo u r R e d Wa l l s
Windows as fences Liars for neighbors Gazing thieves with unmasked eyes

Broken and shattered My edges are sharp and I Doors as walls Dust for children am no longer soft like a Shifting shap es unrealized shapes woman. Spread to the four corners Coffins as beds Lust for love of this box All endings compromis ed compromised Four walls rise above me. our red walls Plain and wooden, I am half F Containing all in darkness. Secrets for none to s ee see My fragments are pushed Four red walls into the thick mess of my Let everything in Keep nothing safe but me choices The weight pulls me down. I could break free still There is time to collect my- They pushed her death all round the square They pushed it on three wheels self They chased her round unmercifully But it is easier to be ceGrim reapers at her heels mented in place. The past is mixed with the With torn hair and bloodied feet she rushed present here upon the crowd And the air sours with And dared the bravest of them all to lift their memories best left alone. mourning shroud The space at the bottom is Silent were the cries, the keens, the wailing roar resigned to disorder Chaos, and I am declared Un-echoed was the knocking persistent at hells door finished. The glass is in place. The race began to quicken Im always on display now Swiftly started, promptly done But please dont look at me They took her body from the square I cant close my eyes. This time the dead have won

Silent

Death

Photos by Tim Stene

Photos by Nicole Livermont

Sporkman

by Dan Hansen