Proverbs on the Tongue (1st)

He who conceals his hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool. (10:18) Repression of negative thoughts and feelings may avoid conflict but brings no healing Concealing bitterness and hatred makes a silent liar of the one harboring those emotions The solution to relational frustration is not to deceptively conceal nor indiscriminately explode, but to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15) Never is slander the answer to conflict (Luke 6:45, Romans 12:17-21, James 4:11), but the biblical mandate is to confront directly and to do it in love (Matthew 18:15) If we give in to the temptation of gossip, we damage our own hearts and more often than not damage the relationship as word eventually gets back to the one we slandered While truth spoken in love can be painful initially, this is an expression of both concern and integrity; it often leads to healing Faithful are the wounds of a friend but deceitful are the kisses on an enemy (27:6) When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise. (10:19) Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. (12:18) Truthful lips endure forever but a lying tongue lasts only a moment. (12:19) He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin. (13:3) The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. (15:2) The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit. (15:4) There is an inverse relationship between wisdom and the volume of words spoken When verbal expression is unending, sinful speech is unavoidable Wise is the man who restrains himself in what he says especially regarding others Recklessness in speech is like a sword, harming not only the intended victim but the one flailing the weapon as well Whoever digs a pit will fall into it, and if someone rolls a stone it will back on him (26:27) The reputation of those with honest character will prevail over an onslaught of malicious talk or rumor, while the words of the insincere and disingenuous fade quickly Truthfulness and restrained speech provides a safeguard for the wise man, but the thoughtless words and imprudent actions of a fool lead to personal disaster A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. (15:1) It is implied that conflict requires a response; not withdrawal, denial, or the dishonest silence of harbored anger (10:18) Yet the response does not need to be angry or irrational, but gentle and conciliatory When King David was greatly offended by foolish Nabal, his wife Abigail stepped into the situation with calmness and wisdom she saved her entire family from destruction (though Nabal died by Gods hand), and she eventually became married to David (I Samuel 25:2-44) The first phrase in this proverb is also exemplified by Gideon, whose mild answer neutralized the angry Ephraimites (Judges 8:1-3) The proverbs second phrase is illustrated by King Solomons son, Rehoboam, whose pride and harshness led to an angry rebellion and a division within the kingdom (I Kings 12:14)