Identify the defining features of an intimate relationship Distinguish intimate relationships from personal relationships and close relationships.

Why intimate relationships are important. Four criteria define an intimate relationship1 bidirectional interdependence 2 respond one another as unique 3 closeness (strong, frequent, diverse, long lasting) 4 sexual interaction Intimate relationship and romantic relationship overlaps, but intimate relationship can with or without romance. Interdependencemutual influence that two people have over one anotherdefining feature of ANY relationship, intimate or otherwise. All relationships imply interdependence. Key aspectit exists between two partners in a relationship. Bidirectionalfor two people in relationship, the interdependence that connects them has to operate in both directions. Unidirectionalone way influence such as you receive spam email from the guy you dont know. It is hardly enough to constitute a relationship. It is not isolated to a single exchange but extends over time. Interdependence is necessary for intimate relationship but not sufficient. From impersonal relationships to PERSONAL relationshipsRecognizing the partner as UNIQUE and SPECIAL. This is a personal relationship. From personal relationship to CLOSE relationshipsSTRONG, FREQUENT, & DIVERSE interdependence that LAST over a considerable period of time. From close relationships to INTIMATE relationshiptwo partners experience a lustful, sexual passion for one another. Sexual interaction without the element of closeness is NOT an intimate relationship. Shock study: Either receive small shock ( red X) or no shock (blue O). Three condition: 1holding partners hand; 2 holding hand of stranger who is the same sex as partner; 3 no hand. Resultparticipants registered less threat when holding their partners hand. The happier the women reported being in their relationship, the less activation occurred in their threat-related brain structures. Study of questionnaires and videotape Visit couples home and give questionnaires to each partner in separate rooms. Then videotape them for 10mins talking about a topic of disagreement in their relationship. Exam negative and positive word in video tape. Resultpatients in happier relationships were less likely to die in this 4 year period. Why are intimate relationships important? 1 intimate relationship is important because they are a basic feature of who we are as human beings. Biologically we appear to be uniquely attuned to the person with whom we share an intimate bond (shock study suggested.). It is universal. 2 intimate relationship is important because of their consequence. It can affect our health. 3 intimate relationship is powerfulhighest highs, lowest lows. Intimate relationships determine the survival of our species. --Intimate relationship in particular are implicated in the mechanisms of evolution, and fitness is affected directly or indirectly by ways human mates attract and select one another. --oxytocin, key ingredient in the neurobiological system that promotes feeling of calmness,

sociability and trust. Study of wolf showed that when inject oxytocin they can develop intimate relationship. And blocking oxytocin can prevent the development of relationship. In summary, core aspects of intimacysex, love, bondingare supported by built-in features of the biological apparatus. Intimate relationships are a universal human experience. Pairbondunion of men and women with or without marriage. Pairbonding is often motivated by love and mutual attraction. From tales, myths, literature we can conclude that intimate relationships are a universal human experience. Example of Japanese ledends and Heiltsuk Nation in Canada. Intimate relationships are best understood as the product of the universal capacity for intimacy and the prevailing cultural and historical settings which the relationships occurall humans have the capacity for intimate relationships, but other factors can modify how we experience and express the capacity. Experience of love differs from culture. Study of students from United States and China showed that they identify the same basic emotions and categorize positive emotions and negative emotions that same wayexcept in the case of love. Individualistic society VS Collectivist society In individualistic society, the family is a support system for the individual who leaves home, falls in love, and eventually introduces the mate to the family. By contrast, individuals are the support systems for families in interdependent societies. Families collaborate to find partners for their offspring, not to promote the couples happiness but to enhance the familys stability or social standing. Intimate relationship expand our range of emotional experience Passionate love VS companionate love Passionate lovemarked more by infatuation, intense preoccupation with the partner, strong sexual longing, throes of ecstasy Companionate lovethese potent feelings diminish but are enriched by warm feelings of attachment, an authentic and enduring bond, a sense of mutual commitment. Intimate relationships affect our mental and physical health Subjective well-beingour reports about how happy we are generally in lifeis linked with various aspects of our intimate relationships. Three ways intimate relationship linked with subjective well-beingrelationship status, relationship quality, relationship transitions. Selection effectwhen groups of people differ, not because of something special about the groups they are in, but because of the people who choose to enter those groups. We cannot conclude with certainty that relationship status, relationship quality or relationship transitions truly caused changes in well-being because of selection effect. Protection effectssomething about the experience itself produces protective benefits or advantages. The study of two groups of people who are very similar but one group married and the other group singled and their level of depression and alcohol use support the idea that something about relationships themselves, and not just the people who select themselves into different versions of them, really produces benefits. That is, something about marriage probably does give individuals some measure of protection that is not otherwise available to single or cohabiting individuals. Relationships are likely to affect financial well-beingpeople take a large financial hit when they divorce especially women. Intimate relationships are likely to affect physical healthpeople experiencing unresolved conflicts in their intimate relationships are more vulnerable to catching a common cold after exposed to an experimentally administered virus. Married people also live longer than unmarried people.

Intimate relationships affect the well-being of children Parents relationship status is more influential than their race and their education in determining whether their children will experience severe poverty. 81% children with unmarried parents experienced severe poverty compared with 69% black children and 63% children with less than 12 years of school. The quality of parents relationship also related to their childrens well-being. High level of conflict between the parents decreased the childrens feelings of emotional security and increase such behavior problems as acting out and displaying aggression with their peers. Caregivers transitions between relationships affect their childrennegative and positive. Children undergo more transitions between relationships tend to display more behavioral problems. (income drop when divorce, parents become less available). How well the child fares seems to be more closely related to the quality of the relationship before the divorce than the divorce itself. Children well-being improves following divorce if the parents marriage before the divorce was marked by high levels of tension and conflict. Caregivers experiences in their intimate relationships can affect their willingness and capacity to give their children the care they need. Q1:The effects of intimate relationships on child well-being wont disappear as they develop through adolescence and into adulthood because the intergenerational transmission effects are well established. The family circumstances children encounter will influence the way they manage their own intimate relationships decades later. Q2: Parental divorce really does increase the likelihood of emotional difficulties and divorce tendencies, beyond the effects of genes shared by parents and offspring. (study of identical twin and their offspring, divorced vs not divorced) Q3: To what extent is a childs fate determined by his caregivers intimate relationships, the answer is incomplete. Having a divorced parent increased the chance of divorce by 10% to 20%. Intimate relationships are the fabric of society Social control theoryhelps explain this link between intimate relationships and the broader social impact of individuals actions. Social relationships organize and regulate how individuals behave, such that fewer, weaker, or poorer relationships increase the occurrence of deviant behavior. People enter into more committed relationships and spent less time with deviant peer group.