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9/10/2011 Rahul Unnikrishnan

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Contents
Learning Style ..................................................................................................................... 3 Who am I? ........................................................................................................................... 4 What kind of a person am I? ............................................................................................... 6 How do my emotions drive my & others actions? .............................................................. 7 What motivates me as a person? ......................................................................................... 9 How do my perceptions affect my behavior? ..................................................................... 9 How do I relate to others? ................................................................................................. 10 How do I deal with conflicts? ........................................................................................... 11 How well do I work with teams and groups? ................................................................... 11 The road ahead .................................................................................................................. 13

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Personal Learning Paper
In life there are certain choices one needs to make at some point of time. These are the choices pertaining to what one needs to do in their life. The choices one makes when they realize what they actually want in their life. In India, a stable and respected career is seen with utmost respect. People take pride in saying where they work and how successful they are. Being born and brought up in such a society obviously I have been influenced by this thought and hence my decision to do my MBA, though this was not my primary reason. Such a choice needs to be taken after thorough thought and introspection. It is not easy and definitely not something which you can make in a day or 2. It is the outcome of our thoughts, experiences, aspirations, dreams, character, behavior, etc. This is a choice which will help script our path to success. This is the choice one will carry forward for rest of their lives. So to make our decision to match with our expectation for the future we need to understand ourselves. Understanding ourselves in depth from various angles makes it easier to make this choice.

Learning Style
Learning is a continuous process. The style changes as you grow up. Looking back I still remember those days when my mom used to sit with me and teach me. Those were the days when I did not like to learn. Learning was the key to get good marks and good marks was the incentive to make my parents buy things for me. Over time I have become independent and started loving the process of learning. This gave me lot of clarity as to what I want to learn and how should I go about it. Experience has been a big factor in developing my own pattern of learning and this pattern of learning is something which will stick on to me for the rest of my life. In this context it is important to realize within a framework where my pattern of learning falls. This is very important from an organizations point of view when it comes to team compositions. Kolbs model talks of 2 approaches towards grasping experience and transforming experience.
Grasping Transforming

Concrete Experience

Reflective Observation

Abstract Conceptualization

Active Experimentation

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Based on the combination of an individuals preferences there are 4 learning styles. I would classify myself as an Accommodator a combination of concrete experience and active experimentation. I am a person who likes to understand the concepts underlying something rather than think and understand things. I would prefer to be explained the basics before I can build on the application aspects of the subject. Once I understand the concepts I would apply it to practical situations and learn the outcomes. Some of the instances I remember include writing down derivations from the scratch to ascertain my understanding. I have also received feedback from people saying I fully understand things before using them and not go by peripheral understanding. This does not mean my learning style has been confined to this just that majority of my learning has been this way. Going forward I think reflective observation and abstract conceptualization is also important. Working in unstructured environments would require me to use my experience and churn out solutions (thinking) and moving up in the corporate ladder would require me to put greater use of reflective observation skill. I should try to develop the convergers style of learning which is a combination of active experimentation and abstract conceptualization over long run.

Who am I?

Half the philosophical theories wouldnt have existed had the answer to this question been direct. This is a very powerful and insightful question. This is a question which can propel oneself to higher levels of spiritual understanding. But let me confine here myself to only some aspects about Who am I. The first and the foremost thing about oneself is the self concept one has about himself. The self concept goes a long way in deciding how we present ourselves. Self concept is essentially the perception about oneself in relation to a number of aspects like academics, gender roles, etc. I believe I am a person who is oriented towards academics and I love working on things which interest me. I see myself as person who likes to take responsibility and get things done. I like working with tight deadlines since that usually gets the best out of me. I am generally confident about things I own up and try to involve myself in a plethora of varied activities which will help me develop as a person and prepare myself for future. I think I understand my strengths and my decisions have been 4

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based on my understanding. I can predict fairly well how I will react in typical situations and I have been using this to change some aspects about the way I behave. I believe that success is the result of constant and sincere hard work and this keeps me motivated to work. When I look back I see that my thoughts and actions have been influenced a lot by my parents and family. Being brought up in a balanced family (neither very conservative nor very progressive) I think my actions bear the typical mark. I am a very risk averse person and always try to take the concrete path against the shaky untried path. Stability is something I view with lot of significance and that is something I always try to achieve. Family comes as the topmost priority for me. I think all what I am now is due to constant help and support from them. Though they say I was very independent from a young age I know it never would have been possible had it not been for their support. Showing me the importance of values through their actions and inculcating them in me at a young age has instilled in me a firm set of values which I believe in and the same has guided me throughout my life. These have helped me chose the right from the wrong, give due consideration to human beings and do what is apt for the situation. Values instilled are an investment for a lifetime and that is definitely one of the greatest gifts my family could give me. When I look at my Johari window I realize that a big part of me is unknown both to myself and others and another big portion is my blindspot. I think this speaks a lot about me. One major aspect is I have been always happy to stick to things I am good at doing rather than venture out to try newer things. Nominating myself for the post of Finance head of OJAS and finally getting selected for the post is a first time experience for me. In my undergraduate life I failed to see the point in taking up such a responsibility, but once I realized it I took up the opportunity and I am happy I was selected for the post. This is one of the many steps I have planned to take up to explore the unknown sides of me. Taking feedback is another step which will help me understand my blindspots. After spending about 3 months in the institute I have been able to work closely with a good number of people. This gives me enough number of people to take feedback from. One feedback I receive from most of the people is the fact that I am painfully direct. Though it is a part of my character and something which separates me from others I would love to lessen it. Many a times this is mistaken for a rude reply or a do not care reply; especially when I am new to a person. My close friends know me well enough to understand that I talk that way not because I am rude but I tell the truth at face value to people. If I am little mindful of what I say I think many more people would find me approachable. This is especially important when you grow in the organization and you will required to work for short durations with lot of people when there wouldnt the time to settle into a relation with him/her.

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0 10 20 30 40 50 60 70 80 90 100 Faade Unknown Open Arena Blindspot 10 20 30 40 50 60 70 80 90 100

I think I am able to build good relationships with most of the people given some time. I am that kind of a person who takes time to open up with people but once that threshold is crossed I am an open book to my friends. I dont believe in building relationships with many people rather I would love to have few close friends. I think my undergraduate life has made this point very clear to me. I still keep very good contact with my close friends from undergraduate. I believe in investing in long term relationships rather than short term ones. I think this develops more trust and depth to the relationship. A timeline for the developmental process is tough to be ascertained and moreover it is a continuous process. It is through concerted efforts that some of the behavioral aspects can be changed. But yes I can surely improve things like my time management skills by the end of first year at the institute. I am sure first year will give me many opportunities to showcase and improve my time management skills.

What kind of a person am I?

Personality is defined as sum total of ways in which an individual reacts & interacts with people. This is the most common definition of personality. I think to carry on further discussion on personality using one the Big Five Model exercise done at PG Lab will be helpful. It essentially talks about 5 aspects and I felt it is one of those tests which aptly describe my behavior. Emotionality parameter describes the ability of a person to withstand stress. The test classified me as someone resilient that comes with a host of adjectives like secure, 6

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unflappable, rational, guilt free, etc. I think this is a very right description of me. I am not really emotionally attached to anyone except my family. I am mostly independent and able to make decisions with a clear mind and I rarely repent over what I did. I am able to differentiate emotional aspects from working life and thus make clear decisions. Extraversion talks about how comfortable one is with relationships. I fall under the ambivert category which is a mix of characteristics like private at the same time sociable, reserved but at the same time extremely talkative with friends, etc. This is very true and I think I have always enjoyed being this way. Openness deals with how well one expresses his interests and how open one is to trying novel ideas. Preserver was the heading under which I was classified. The typical characteristic of a preserver includes being practical, conservative, efficient, depth of knowledge, etc. I think one recent instance was when playing the DAS simulation. Despite our company doing particularly well I was very averse to taking any risk. At that point if I had taken little risk I would have been able to perform even better in the game. This showed me that I was a very conservative person. Agreeableness refers to the tendency to differ from others. Being a negotiator I have in me a mixture of characteristics like aggressive but frank, tough but team player, etc. I believe in openly disagreeing with people rather than talking behind their backs or not telling them. This might make me seem a challenger but with people I know really well it helps me convey things easily. The last of the big five is the conscientiousness which is a measure of reliability. I fall under the category of focused which tells that I am dependable, organized, disciplined, cautious and stubborn. This is a perfect description of who I am. I believe in doing work and proving myself rather than wasting time on talk. Being stubborn doesnt really present a good picture, but being stubborn on certain things has helped me stay the way I am. I think I need to develop many skills like being more proactive and showing more concern for relationships. I think it is probably because of the support I got from family and my relatives that I have not given due importance to other relationships. I know family is something you have for all your life and that belief made me oblivious to other relationships around me. Yes, I have got a good circle of friends from school and college days. But I think a little more consideration for my friends can help me grow my circle.

How do my emotions drive my & others actions?

Emotion is a word which is often not completely understood. Wikipedia defines emotion as Emotion is the complex psychophysiological experience of an individual's state of mind as interacting with biochemical (internal) and environmental (external) influences. This is indeed a complex definition of emotion, but we must understand that emotion is nothing something easy to understand as well. One simple way of describing emotions which all of us can relate to is Intense feelings that are directed at someone or 7

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something. Personally I associate emotional with being attached to someone very much, taking remarks in a personal way rather than in the spirit, etc. People tell me I lack emotional touch to my behavior. This I believe is a result of me being a candid and direct person. I am not really attached to anyone since I believe at some point or other you will end up losing that someone. This belief has also made me immune to or unaware of certain emotions which people generally expect from us. For example people generally use terms like cute, adorable, etc when they come across a kitten. I rarely associate these words with a kitten. I dont really find anything worth mentioning in a kitten.

This sort of behavior leaves me oblivious to emotional cues from other people too. I am often left in an uncomfortable state when I encounter people who are depressed or are in a bad mood. Firstly I am not sure how to respond to what they say and secondly I am a person who loves to joke about things which all people may not find it appreciable. This is clearly shown in my EQ Map also. I am vulnerable to emotional awareness of others. As a budding manager I need to develop the skill of emotional intelligence. I also think the affective events theory which talks about the emotional influences on employees at the work place happenings could bear an effect on their work. A grumpy manager would leave his employees irritated and not really wanting to work. I was lucky enough to have a very motivating and positive manager at my first job. His enthusiasm and eagerness spread to me also and I was able to do a good job at work. I think I am not a great motivator by talk, but I can do a better job by my actions. When I talk based on what I have done, it gives me more confidence. Having done something hands on gives you more command over the activity and when a problem arises you can relate to it more easily. I can also perform well when faced with an adversity. At the PG Lab since it was the first time I was going trekking I had to be really careful. To make matters worse the sole of both my shoes gave away and I was climbing a tricky hill with a shoe which would be ill advised to wear even on level ground. I could successfully complete the trek and I think it was my belief in myself(Self efficacy) and ability to face the adversity which helped me succeed. EQ Map presents to me a plethora of areas for improvement. Compassion, emotional expression, etc are some major areas requiring my attention. Developing these would 8

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have its impact on some of the other aspects of me as well. This can be cultivated from the grass root level by trying to appreciate more the work of others, helping out people in whatever way possible, etc.

What motivates me as a person?

Motivation is what makes people achieve their potential in life. Motivation can be anything money, power, position, status, good feeling, passion or anything. Up to certain stage in life people can be forced to do things. But beyond a point one needs to find motivation to achieve greater things. I still remember how I was made to sit and study for a stipulated time when I was a kid in class 3 or 4. By class 6 I was motivated to study. The motivation at that point of time was getting into good books of the teacher and to escape scolding at home. Times have changed and so have I. Needs form an essential basis for deciding the motivation. I have always wanted to hold a respectable position in society and be seen as someone successful. With success, I expect to lead a comfortable life. This is the fundamental need which formed by motivation to perform well. I always saw doing well academically as one of the easiest ways to reach my goal. In simple words my expectation at the end of the course, like most of the others, is a good job with a decent pay package. Connecting this with various theories of needs, Maslovs hierarchy of needs explains my needs to an extent. I need to first ensure physiological needs followed by safety. Then comes social needs and then esteem needs. A comfortable job allows me to meet my physiological and safety needs. Social needs and esteem needs are satisfied by as your grow higher up in the job cadre. Though I enjoy working alone, my short stint at my workplace made me realize the importance of working as a team. I enjoy being affiliated with people and working together rather than having power to control people. I enjoy when I am able to achieve my goals and I think this is the second most important factor after affiliation. I think working in groups where you are familiar with your teammates helps the team cope up with failure and come back focused more easily.

How do my perceptions affect my behavior?

Perceptions go a long way into affecting my behavior. In this context I think perceptions are formed by our experiences, what we have heard, how that something/someone comes across to us, etc. As humans we all are prone to biases in our behavior. I think I have certain strong biases like stereotyping. For example I tend to attribute certain characteristics to all north Indians. This is based on the little experience I have had with them. But I think after coming here and coming across a variety of people I realize how wrong I was with this perception importance of experiences.

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As I was talking about the stereotyping bias I have, the effect of this is seen in the way I tend to behave. Since I approach that person with a preset mind and I expect certain kind of behavior from him, I will try to find elements of what I expect in him in his actions. I think I used to be heavily influenced by this earlier. I think moving out of my home and experiencing hostel life has helped me get to know people closer. This has helped me understand how the initial perception one gets about a person could be the exact opposite of what he actually is. On work front I think perceptions and behavior play a very important role. How a manager perceives his team to be can go a long way in the teams performance. The Pygmalion effect I think is a very true phenomenon. I was lucky enough to have a manager who gave me enough freedom to work but expected a great deal of work from me; not in terms of volume but more in terms of content and quality. And since it was my first job I too wanted to show my capabilities. This combination actually helped me perform well in my first project and thus earn an excellent review/feedback. I think the power of expectations on me is very high. I try my best to live upto the expectation when someone expects something from me if there is appropriate incentive for me in it.

How do I relate to others?

Interpersonal relations are very important in todays world. I think FIRO B scores give a fair idea about my relationship needs. My need for inclusion is less compared to how much people include me. This goes in line with my feeling of happiness or satisfaction when I am alone and pursue interests I like. I would spend an evening watching a movie or playing/watching sports rather than going out for a party with relatively less close friends. I enjoy being giving a free run but when it comes to me controlling others I am not so lenient. I prefer some degree of control over the proceedings. My want for control is more than how much I want to be controlled. If I am in charge of an event or program I would like people working with me to be accountable to me. I enjoy working with people who enjoy being responsible for the task they take up and do a good job. When it comes to affection I am reserved in expressing it. I observed only lately. When I reflect on this I cannot really find out any particular why this is less. I just dont feel expressing it is really necessary. The other side of this is my need for affection is also 10

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very less. I think this is because I was independent from quite a young age. I enjoyed doing things my way and was happy to do it my way. The result of this I am never really comfortable when people try to get close with me. My family and a few good friends are the only people who are really close to me. Inclusion 5 2 Control 4 2 Affection 1 1

Expressed Wanted

How do I deal with conflicts?

I think conflicts are a necessary evil. Conflicts are necessary to ensure there is idea creation, finding out ways to do things in a better way, think outside the obvious and ensure healthy competition. Conflicts can also cause problems within teams, lack of willingness to work with certain people, etc. I think I am more of a conflict avoider. This does not mean I take up my points if I feel I am right. I generally try to talk it out with the person I am having the difference of opinion unless its a group. Also I argue for my point only when I am very confident of it. I try to validate my idea or look for sufficient proof to back it up. But one thing I always make sure is tell the other person that there was nothing personal in the conflict. This may not be really necessary in the corporate set up, but I have had experiences where people take it in a personally. Hence I do this. I havent really had the opportunity to test my conflict resolution skills since most of the conflicts have been at college with my friends where resolution of conflicts is easier. In the 6 months I worked I never really had any conflicts with anyone. From what I have experienced and observed lack of proper communication is one of the main reasons for conflicts among friends. Thus compromising was the most common method used to resolve conflicts. I think I handle conflicts pretty well since my friends have come to me on various occasions to get a third persons opinion.

How well do I work with teams and groups?

I think groups are formed for satisfying the needs such as security, status and social needs. A group or circle is formed because being with a group makes us more confident and we have someone to take help from or bank on.

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I have learnt about importance of team work from playing basketball. Sports are a great way to learn to trust your team mates, be selfless and work together to achieve success. The fact that success can be achieved only through cooperation makes team work all the more essential. I think this realization has made me a strong player. I enjoy taking responsibilities and making sure I deliver what I took up. I believe I am a good contributor to the team and try to make my contribution stand out. I think the airplane making competition at PG lab was one instance where I could use my skills to ensure success of the group. Since the group was entirely new to each other it took some time to get started. I was able to get the group working by making a simple model of plane which triggered contributions from other members and brought the group alive. I think Belbins team roles are a decent indicator of my strengths and the roles I generally play in teams. Though I have scored the highest points in team worker role, I dont think that is the role I play best. I think the roles which came a close second describe me better. Completer-finisher and Monitor-evaluator came second in terms of points. The typical features associated with these roles and which matches in my case are painstaking, orderly, anxious, sober, unemotional, prudent and conscientious. These adjectives encapsulate almost all the roles I play as a team member. I am able to relate to these easily with the kind of roles I play in my academic group. The next highest scoring role was coordinator with typical attributes like calm, self confident, controlled, etc. I think along with the attributes from the previous roles this completes all the roles I play in a team. I am a person who takes some time to trust a person completely. Initially I find it hard to trust others with important work. I try to make sure I am a part of it and see to it that it is completed. But as I gel with the team and know them better I trust them. I trusting depends on a huge extant to the kind of task the team is doing. If the importance of the task is little or nil, trusting someone is far easier for me. I think this is because of my willingness to ensure that I should do whatever is in my capability to achieve success. 12

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The road ahead

I think the road ahead for me is very clear. I clearly understand my strengths and am happy about what I am now. Though I am not exactly clear on what is my long term aim, I know corporate ladder is not the answer. I want a life where I have enough time for family and pursue my interests. Yes, I want to be a part of corporate world and work for some time before settling down. Obviously the best time for this is right after the course when I am fresh and without any responsibilities. I think my personality is dominated by the characteristics of a strong task completer or monitor. The conscientiousness element is very high which hinders my creativity. In fact it shuts it out completely as shown in the EQ map (cautionary level). I think I need to improve creativity since that is an important aspect as a manager. A monotonous manager rarely can make a team work attain excellence or full potential. Another very important trait I need to develop is compassion which has a good influence on relationship quotient. I have received feedback from a close friend of mine saying I dont appreciate things as much as I should. This was an entirely new feedback to me. When I started observing myself in a couple of situations I realized this was true. Since then I have put effort to appreciate people and I think I have started fairly well when I received a response You are actually saying this? when I recently congratulated someone. This is just one aspect of compassion. I think empathizing with people is another aspect I need to develop. I fail to see things from the point of view of others and give my comments thinking only from my point of view. I have had instances where I have laughed at people hearing their plights. Looking back I have felt bad for them, but the damage was done with respect to the relationship. This explains why I have good relationship with only a few people. This is further substantiated by cautionary level in relationship quotient. The other problem was I realized this aspect quite late and since then I have been trying to put in more effort to maintain relationships. This is something I should develop over the time I will spend at SP Jain. I major change which has been happening has been my attitude towards life as a whole. I never really thought about life ahead other than what I should do next in the immediate 13

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future. I dont know if it is because of the influence of people around me over here or it is because of the fact that chances of me doing any more full time courses is less, I have started thinking about how to plan for the future. I think in this context it is very important for me to analyze develop awareness of my actions and to refine my behavior. I think this awareness bug has caught up to me in the form to me trying to be aware of how I present myself to others. This has been also due to the kind of thought I have given over the course of doing various exercises as a part of the course. The feedbacks received, assignment on our strengths and finally this complete analysis has helped me reflect on myself and actually think how my actions have been and how it should be. My final thought is I have a much better idea of my own jigsaw puzzle and now I know how to go about and join all the pieces to complete myself.

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