Wacholz 1 Anthony Wacholz Professor Nicole Biever English 201 March 28th, 2012 Rhetorical Analysis of " Pharmacy

Ethics: Professional Obligation vs. What is Right" Have you ever been criticized by others? People usually do not take criticism well because, by human nature, we hate having our mistakes pointed out at us. Imagine having to criticize yourself. I have done this in this essay, and it has been one of the most difficult essays I have ever written because of that fact. In this essay, I will analyze my own essay titled "Pharmacy Ethics: Professional Obligation vs. What is Right." Overall, my essay successful accomplishes its goal to persuade because of excellent content, form, and style. The contents of my essay will be analyzed first. My essay contains an easily-found underlined thesis statement. It states, "Pharmacists should have the unquestionable right to refuse filling prescriptions they ethically disagree with" (Wacholz 1). This statement persuades because it argues one specific side of an issue. Many people believe that pharmacists have the right to refuse filling prescriptions they ethically disagree with, which coincides with the thesis statement. On the other hand, other people believe that pharmacists should not have this right and should fill every prescription given to them, which would be the counterargument. The fact that this thesis statement argues one side of a topic that consists of two different and distinct arguments makes it an effective persuasive thesis statement. This thesis statement fits this essay well because it corresponds with the essay's goal to persuade a specific side of an ethical argument.

Wacholz 2 The introduction paragraph support the thesis statement because it introduces and clearly states the thesis statement. Paragraphs 2 and 3 of my essay contain information vital to the arguments in my essay. The Code of Ethics for Pharmacists and the Oath of a Pharmacist state themselves in these paragraphs, and I constantly refer to these statements when I argue my thesis statement later in my essay. An argument could be made that including both statements in this essay create unnecessary wordiness, but I believe the content explains clearly on what basis pharmacist make their ethical decisions. Paragraph 4 clearly explains how the Code of Ethics for Pharmacists and the Oath of a Pharmacist support my thesis statement. Paragraph 5 explains the current laws in the United States involving pharmacists. This gives the reader a perspective of what stance the states have on the thesis statement and indirectly what the United States as a whole believes. Paragraphs 6 through 10 focus on birth control pills. These paragraphs all support the thesis statement because they explain and discuss one of the most common prescriptions that pharmacists will refuse. Discussing birth control pills in this essay allows for the addition of more specific examples of pharmacists who refused prescriptions or wanted to refuse prescriptions and why. Paragraphs 11 through 14 focus on arguments that justify my thesis statement. These paragraphs contain less specific examples and citations, but they thoroughly explain the core ideals of my thesis statement argument. These paragraphs exist as the most important part of the essay. In these paragraphs, I also refer to the Code of Ethics for Pharmacists multiple times when supporting my arguments that support my thesis statement. Paragraphs 15 through 18 focus on another specific prescription that some pharmacists will refuse to fill: assisted suicide pills. These paragraphs thoroughly explain the topic of assisted suicide and quote an article against filling assisted suicide prescriptions, found in the

Wacholz 3 Journal of Pharmacy and Law, a respected journal and authority on controversial pharmacy topics. The inclusion of the topic of assisted suicide pills in this essay allows for an important and interesting comparison of assisted suicide and birth control pills found in Paragraph 18, which further supports the thesis statement with the idea that pharmacists should be able to refuse filling prescriptions for both of them. Finally, the conclusion paragraph effectively sums up the ideas of the essay and ends with clearly restating the thesis statement. Overall, the contents of this essay effectively support the thesis statement. A large amount of this essay uses explanations to prove the validity of the thesis statement. I then incorporated many different specific examples that cited experts and pharmacists who agree with my thesis statement and why. I even included a citation of the counterargument to my thesis statement and explained the flaws of the counterargument. The essay contains sufficient examples and arguments to persuade the reader of my thesis statement. Form will be analyzed next, starting with the introduction paragraph. This paragraph's first two sentences create a decent attention-getter, but the awkward phrasing should be rewritten. Otherwise, the introduction does an excellent job of introducing the main ideas of the essay and clearly stating the thesis statement. The conclusion for this essay effectively sums up the essay by reinstating the main ideas discussed and explained in the essay. The conclusion ends with the exact thesis statement, which ties it directly to the introduction. The thesis statement should be reiterated in the conclusion, but with different wording. Restating the thesis statement exactly how it appeared in the introduction appears redundant. This essay's structure contains similarities to the Classic System explained in The St. Martin's Handbook (Lunsford 210). One difference does exist though; I included the

Wacholz 4 background information and lines of argument for assisted suicide pills towards the end of the essay, after the explanation of the background information and lines of argument for the rest of the essay. This slight difference to the Classic System works well for my essay because the assisted suicide topic adds minor details to my essay and explaining the background information early in the essay, with the rest of the background information, would separate the information too much, leading to possible confusion. Otherwise, the Classic System works well because it groups similar ideas together, which leads to an essay that appears organized and structured. Also, the Classic System logically makes sense in how an argument should be effectively structured. Background information should be explained before the lines of argument because the reader will then understand the arguments better and therefore have a better chance of understanding and relating to the lines of argument. The more the reader understands the lines of argument, the greater of a chance they will agree with the original thesis statement being argued. Most of the paragraphs seem to have smooth transitions from one to another. Paragraph 6 does contain an awkward transition though. "The first issue of pharmacy ethics that needs to be addressed is the filling of birth control pill prescriptions" (Wacholz 3). Because the sixth paragraph contains this sentence and the sentence refers to the "first issue" of pharmacy ethics, it seems awkward. A more appropriate phrasing could be "One of the issues of pharmacy ethics....." or "A particular issue of pharmacy ethics........" The form of the essay works well for this argument. The introduction needs a better attention-getter, but otherwise the introduction and conclusion seem adequate. The Classic System of organization structures the argument, which logically organizes the information and arguments to most effectively persuade the reader. Also, smooth transitions between each paragraph create better comprehension of the material.

Wacholz 5 Style will be analyzed last. In my essay, I noticed the overuse of the "to be" verbs, such as: is, are, was, and were. Approximately 54 uses of "to be" verbs exist in my essay, and most of these verbs could change into more descriptive verbs. Take for example this sentence from my essay. "This oath is an important and crucial part of the initiation process a pharmacy student goes through when becoming a licensed pharmacist" (Wacholz 2). To eliminate the "to be" verb, this sentence should state, "This oath exists as an important and crucial part of the initiation process a pharmacy student goes through when becoming a licensed pharmacist." This change makes the sentence clearer because the verb makes the sentence more descriptive. The other 53 uses of "to be" verbs should change in a similar fashion, replacing the "to be" verb with a more descriptive verb. Three examples of expletives exist in my essay. The first example states, "There are many debatable topics pertaining to pharmacy ethics that could be discussed" (Wacholz 1). This should be rephrased to, "Many debatable topics exist pertaining to pharmacy ethics that could be discussed." Another example states, "There is a typical misconception when it comes to birth control prescriptions" (Wacholz 4). This should be rephrased to, "A typical misconception exists that pertains to birth control prescriptions." Both of these corrections reduce the wordiness of the original sentences and brings the important ideas of the sentences closer to the beginning. I found some other grammar mistakes in my essay. The sentence, " Without the expertise and knowledge of pharmacists reviewing these prescriptions, many patients could be harmed from incorrect dosages or unwanted interactions or side effects," should change to, "Without the expertise and knowledge of pharmacists reviewing these prescriptions, many patients could be harmed from incorrect dosages, unwanted interactions, or side effects," because a list of three or more ideas needs to be set off with commas (Wacholz 7). Also, the sentence,

Wacholz 6 "The topic of murder and ending someone's life has always been a controversial topic, mostly because people's opinions on what exactly murder means," needs to be changed to, "The topic of murder and ending someone's life has always been a controversial topic, mostly because people's opinions on what exactly murder means differ," because the second half of the sentence exists as a fragment. I believe my essay succeeded in its original goal, which should persuade readers that pharmacists should have the right to refuse filling prescriptions they ethically disagree with. The contents of my essay sufficiently explains to the reader the background information of pharmacy ethics and persuades an argument backed up by expert opinions and other example. I also explained how each paragraph in the essay helps support the thesis statement. The form of the essay bases its structure off the Classic System and works well for an argument-style essay because of clear and logical design. Finally, the style of the essay supports the argument because of clear phrasing and relatively few grammar mistakes. Overall, my essay succeeds in creating a successful argument because of excellent content, form, and style.

Wacholz 7 Works Cited Lunsford, Andrea A. The St. Martin's Handbook. 7th Ed. Boston: Bedford/St. Martin's, 2011. Print. Wacholz, Anthony. " Pharmacy Ethics: Professional Obligation vs. What is Right." Essay. South Dakota State University, 2012. Print.