41 reasons why you shouldnt date a photographer

Photographers are a different kind of creatures. We are both artists and entrepreneurs. We love our cameras and we sure love playing with them, sometimes too much. After a longer series of technical articles and advice, I thought Id put together a list of reasons why you shouldnt date a photographer. Before we get started, I just want to point out that although some of the items on the list will seem realistic, its all intended to make you laugh or at least bring a knowing smile on your face. At the end of the day, everybody loves photographers, otherwise I cant explain why so many people want to get into photography. Without further ado, I bring you the 41 things to take into account before setting a date with a photographer. 1. Theyre weird

Photographers are artists. And that should be self explanatory. You might find yourself at a restaurant table with a photographer who is looking deep into your eyes. Well, dont be fooled. Hes probably thinking about your best angle 2. The birthday presents will surprise you Most of the times it will be a framed portrait of yourself, captured some time ago when you probably werent looking. Canon Rebel T4i | Nikon D7100 | Nikon D800 | Canon 5D Mark III | Nikon D5200 | Sony A99 3. Their favorite days are not yours Like most people, you probably enjoy a bright, sunny day. Well, photographers enjoy foggy, gloomy mornings that would make most people sad. 4. Theyre hoarders Photographers collect piles of news papers, magazine, and generally anything they find inspiring, even for a short term. 5. They will break the law

Trespassing into abandoned buildings has always been a favorite activity among photographers, and they rarely even concern themselves with the fact that they are breaking laws. 6. Your vacation luggage will look like youre moving Thats because no photographer who respects himself will go on vacations without at least 50lbs of gear. 7. Watching movies together will not be as expected

The reason for that is because photographers will constantly criticize choice of color and frame composition in a movie. 8. They mark everything Especially their photos. You will rarely see a photographers portfolio thats not full of watermarks. 9. Everyone else sucks Photographers are very proud creatures. Therefore, nobody elses work is as good as theirs, and, at best, it can only come close. 10. Envy takes a new form Among men, there is the well-known term penis envy. Among photographers, its a whole different thing. Its called camera envy. 11. They spend time with cool people You might be an interesting person with interesting friends, but photographers spend most of their time with models, stylists, designers and other cool people. 12. Their movie choices are different than yours Thats because most of their choices are old, artsy movies that most people never get. 13. They like to play it vintagein excess They either use film cameras or dress like photographers did forty years ago.

14. They are control freaks

They like to control the position of anything. Whether its you or the coffee cup on the table. It has to look good. 15. They dont care about your opinions Yet they always want to show you their latest photos. 16. Their communications is awkward at the least They might not return your phone calls or Facebook messages, but you can be sure that if you check their Instagram account, it will be active on a daily basis. 17. They are way too honest about your looks If you ask a photographer if you look fat, hell probably say yes, but not to worry, hell Photoshop it later. 18. They spend most of their time in front of a computer Its not for Facebook or porn, but they can spend days in a row editing their pictures.

19. Romantic sunsets will never be the same Unlike any other people, when you gaze at a beautiful sunset with a photographer, instead of feeling the romantic mood, theyll probably be thinking f8 at 1/125. 20. They wont spend any serious money on you If you go out with a photographer and point out a certain pair of shoes that you really like, you should remove any expectations. They might cost 100$ but they wont get them for you. Instead, they will $1000 glass for themselves. 21. Meals together will be quite different Instead of actually enjoying their meal, photographers will probably spend the first five minutes Instagraming the dish from every possible angle. 22. They hate it when your friends ask photography questions One thing photographers hate being asked by newbies, are questions about camera purchases. They get irritated when someone wants a camera that takes good pictures, but it shouldnt be anything professional. 23. Holding hands will be pretty rare

Thats because theyll be carrying a heavy camera most of the times. 24. They never send you the photos they takeof you

Noticed how your photographer girlfriend or boyfriend snapped a few random shots of you the other day? Dont worry. Youll probably never see them.

25. They dont run away from natural disasters If you live in a hurricane active area and are dating a photographergood luck! Instead of running away, your love one will probably wait around for the action to happen, just to get some dramatic shots in that rare light. 26. Anniversaries will be missed Think of it this way: if your anniversary and an interesting workshop happen on the same day, you might as well forget about the romantic dinner. 27. They are hazardous to themselves If any accidents happen or if there is a hazardous situation, a photographer will protect his gear before anything else. That means that you or they are secondary priorities. 28. They stare at people in public If you catch your date staring at someone attractive or, just as well someone different, dont worry, theyre not having any dirty thoughts. Theyre probably just imagining the photo they would take of that person. It doesnt make it any less awkward or embarrassing though. 29. They find beauty in the weirdest places That includes dirty alleys, places with a lot of poverty or just about any other location normal people would stay away from.

30. Youll have a hard time proving that you were together on vacation Thats because theyll be taking most of the pictures, without themselves being in front of the camera. 31. They wont photograph what you ask them Think having a photographer partner will bring you advantages? Think again. Photographers are very proud and stubborn creatures and they will rarely photograph anything they consider unworthy, unless its paid or they like it. NIKON Prime Lenses CANON Prime SIGMA Prime Lenses Lenses Canon EF 24mm Sigma 24mm f/1.8 Nikon 24mm f/1.4 f/1.4L II EX DG Nikon AF-S 50mm Canon EF 50mm Sigma 35mm F1.4 f/1.4G f/1.4 USM DG HSM Nikon 35mm Canon EF 35mm Sigma 50mm f/1.4 f/1.4G f/1.4L EX DG HSM Nikon 85mm Canon EF 85mm Sigma 85mm f/1.4 f/1.4G f1.2L II EX DG HSM Nikon 300mm Canon EF 300mm Sigma 300mm f/2.8G AF-S ED f/2.8L IS f/2.8 EX DG IF 32. Theyll remind everyone of what it is they do If youre out socializing with friends and are having a normal conversation, dont expect it to last too long. Your date will probably be jumping in with some killer stories about a place or a person they photographed in the past.

33. Birthday presents will be expensive Anything under $500 will probably not buy them anything useful for their hobby, not something they already havent got anyway. 34. They wont Photoshop your older photos Your older vacation or family photos might need some improvement and your photographer partner should be just the person for the job. Not likely. Their ego will prevent them from editing anything not taken by them. 35. They dont like your emo and artsy friends Thats because unless its someone more famous than them, theyre not really worth spending time with. 36. They hardly print any of their work Yet the storage space on their computer is always low because of the massive numbers of photographs. 37. If you accidentally drop a camera, youll owe them big time

The average contents of a photographers bag cost anywhere between $1500 and well a lot. Make sure you are extra careful around their gear, or else. 38. Youll turn into a model, whether you like it or not. It might seem like fun in the beginning, but dont be fooled. Whenever youre out for a walk and the light will seem interesting for your date, youll have to pose for at least one portrait. And no, the clothes youll be wearing wont matter. 39. Theyre a pain at family events Lets say someone in your family is getting married and you decide to bring your date. Most of their attention will probably be going to the photographer hired to shoot the wedding. It will be a mix of criticism of everything the hired pro does and a secret envy that he didnt get to do it, even after refusing in the first place. 40. Nothing natural is good Translated: every picture must be tweaked with Photoshop or Lightroom. Dont ever expect to see any pictures straight out of the camera. 41. When staring into your eyes, it usually means something else You might find it to be a romantic moment, but its usually a process that goes on in their mind and has to do with how they would correct the tiny imperfections on your face.