How to Spot a Pathological Liar

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The ter , &liar, liar pants on 'ire( takes on new eanin$ when dealin$ with a patholo$ical liar. This person ay not be co pletely rooted in reality, belie)in$ the lies they tell, o'ten in an e''ort to re edy low sel' estee . *nlike tellin$ a 'ew 'ibs here and there, or sli$htly e+a$$eratin$ the tr,th once in a while, the patholo$ical liar lies abo,t literally e)ery aspect o' his or her li'e. Fro how ,ch was spent on dinner last ni$ht to talkin$ abo,t the last ti e the do$ was bathed, the patholo$ical liar 'eels that e)ery bit o' co ,nication has strate$ic eanin$ positioned 'or his or her $ain.

-ein$ lied to on a consistent basis is not only 'r,stratin$ b,t also disrespect',l to the other person. !o how do yo, deter ine i' yo,.re dealin$ with so eone who ay drop a 'ew 'ibs on occasion )ers,s a tr,e patholo$ical liar/ 0

Steps

1. 1 Understand what a pathological liar is. -asically, a patholo$ical liar is so eone who tells lies habit,ally, chronically and co p,lsi)ely. 1t has si ply beco e a way o' li'e 'or this person, to ake ,p thin$s 'or a )ariety o' reasons and e)ent,ally, the tr,th beco es ,nco 'ortable while wea)in$ whoppers 'eels ri$ht to the . This kind o' lyin$ tends to de)elop early on in li'e, o'ten as a response to di''ic,lt ho e or school sit,ations that see ed to resol)e better i' the child lied. 1t.s a bad habit, not a anip,lati)e trait22this is how to di''erentiate a patholo$ical liar 'ro a sociopath who does seek to anip,late.

3. 3 Determine whether the persons details and information comes across as consistent every time they tell a story. Find an easy, r,n"o'"the" ill story, s,ch as what the person had 'or dinner last ni$ht. They ay tell yo, pasta and broccoli, b,t then ay tell yo, and/or others that lobster and cha pa$ne was in)ol)ed. 4etails and in'or ation will constantly chan$e and e)ol)e.
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Co pare and contrast both bi$ and s all details. Fro the n, ber o' people in the liar5s story to the act,al storyline itsel', recall what has chan$ed and how o'ten the details ha)e chan$ed in the story. 6eep tally o' the cast o' characters in)ol)ed in the story. 1', 'or e+a ple, s,ddenly the third ti e the story is told, the cops show ,p, yo, ha)e to start wonderin$ i' he or she is tellin$ the ',ll tr,th. 7ecall the 're8,ency o' the lies. #atholo$ical liars will lie consistently, which is one thin$ yo, can co,nt on22they will lie all the ti e. Cond,ct a non"scienti'ic e+peri ent and in8,ire abo,t certain aspects o' the person5s li'e e)eryday. Choose so ethin$ rando like what the person ate 'or dinner or watched on T9 the e)enin$ be'ore. 0sk the person the sa e 8,estion thro,$ho,t the day to see i' it chan$es22play into the lie by either $ettin$ e+cited or showin$ intri$,e when the person e bellishes the story. 4on.t $i)e away that yo,.)e heard a di''erent answer be'ore.

3. 3 Compare stories with mutual friends of both you and the person you suspect of being a pathological liar to determine if the story has changed or reshaped to accommodate certain personalities. Certain details ay be orphed to create dra a or draw attention to the liar.
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Tryin$ to pit 'riends/'a ily e bers a$ainst each other. 1' the liar was in)ol)ed in an ar$, ent he or she ay chan$e the details so that he or she looks better. 0lso, he or she ay in)ol)e other parties, akin$ ,p in'or ation abo,t the other party in order to $et ore people on his or her side. Tryin$ to a)oid tro,ble. 1' the liar has done so ethin$ wron$, he or she will do whate)er is necessary to a)oid bla e22that eans 'abricatin$ a story and/or pinnin$ c,lpability on another person. Fabricatin$ a lie in order to $ain attention. The ain $oal with any patholo$ical liars is to $ain positi)e notoriety. Fro bein$ bored to ha)in$ low sel' estee , the patholo$ical liar5s $oal is to look better than e)eryone else, so that people pay attention and worship their acco plish ents.

:. : Consider whether the person is lying to gain attention. #art o' the reason the patholo$ical liar 'eels co pelled to lie is beca,se he or she ay 'eel as tho,$h bein$ in the spotli$ht has el,ded the . This person 'eels that he or she sho,ld be the center o' e)eryone5s ,ni)erse and will do what he or she can to ake it happen. *pon tastin$ the spotli$ht, it beco es sel'"rein'orcin$ and the lies $row bi$$er each ti e ;,st to keep on bein$ the center o' attention. <ere are so e possibilities:
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!y pathy attention. The patholo$ical liar 'eels that his or her proble s are para o,nt to what e)eryone else is e+periencin$. Fro a paper c,t to bein$ ad onished by a boss or teacher, the patholo$ical liar r,ns aro,nd tellin$ his or her story to anyone and e)eryone, e+a$$eratin$ the details to ridic,lo,s proportions in order to $ain sy pathy 'ro anyone within earshot. =ants to 'eel i portant. The patholo$ical liar is the kin$ or 8,een o' the &one ,pper.( =hate)er acco plish ent yo,5)e achie)ed, they done it better. This person always has to 'eel s,perior to yo, at all ti es, no atter i' it5s in the pro'essional or personal arena. Feels bored. *n'ort,nately, beca,se this person5s li'e is not rooted in reality, he or she ay beco e easily bored i' dra a is not swirlin$ aro,nd his or her head. 0s a res,lt, lies ay be

'abricated in order to a ,se or entertain this person, which ,n'ort,nately eans that other people beco e in)ol)ed and possibly h,rt as a res,lt. 1nsec,rity. %ow sel' estee is one o' the bi$$est reasons why people beco e patholo$ical liars. =hether they conscio,sly reco$ni>e it or not, a patholo$ical liar 'eels that he or she is not i portant eno,$h as they are so they ,st ake ,p acco plish ents or e)ents to position the sel)es as worthy.

5. 5 Loo! to whether the person has an addiction or secret habits that are potentially harmful. #atholo$ical lyin$ can arise in tande with wantin$ to hide an alcoholic or dr,$ addiction, an obsession with doin$ so ethin$ too ,ch s,ch as spendin$ ti e online or $a in$, or in relation to a edical condition s,ch as b,li ia or anore+ia. Therapy, $ro,p co,nselin$ and other pro'essional inter)entions are i portant 'or s,ch people b,t it ay help yo, to better ,nderstand s,ch lyin$ i' yo, know abo,t the oti)ation behind it.
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#art o' the therapy needs to address co p,lsi)e lyin$. 0 co p,lsi)e liar can be chan$ed. There ay be other personality disorders at iss,e, s,ch as narcissistic personality disorder, bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder.

?. ? "#amine the persons reaction when they$re busted in a lie. The worst thin$ that can happen to a patholo$ical liar is to be b,sted 'or tellin$ the lie.
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E+tre e de'ensi)eness. E+pect the person to beco e e+tre ely de'ensi)e, doin$ whate)er he or she can to pin bla e on so eone else. @,ickly 'abricatin$ another lie to co)er ,p the ori$inal 'ib. The patholo$ical liar will start the co)er",p process 8,ickly to ens,re that their rep,tation re ains in tact. This ay incl,de a bi$$er lie than the ori$inal 'ib22which ay be 8,ite apparent. 9indicti)e and ay seek re)en$e. 7a$e and an$er ay be another reaction ste in$ 'ro bein$ &o,ted(, so e+pect possible retaliation or )indicti)e beha)ior. 0lternati)ely, they ay 'eel ,pset that they ha)e been ca,$ht in the act by so eone who cares 'or the and ha)e a tear',l eltdown.

A. A Determine if the person lives in reality. The patholo$ical liar is one who typically does not li)e in reality and has tro,ble aintainin$ any consistency in his or her li'e. !o e si$ns incl,de:
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=anderin$ 'ro ;ob to ;ob. <e or she ay not be able to hold down a ;ob 'or a lon$ a o,nt o' ti e d,e to either bein$ b,sted 'or lyin$ or not bein$ able to handle day"to"day ,ndane tasks beca,se o' bl,''in$ their way into the ;ob. Can5t hold a steady relationship. 7o antic and interpersonal relationships o'ten 'ail22this person will typically ha)e a lo)e o' his or her li'e or a best 'riend 'or a 'ew onths and then will s,ddenly no lon$er ha)e contact with that person. -etween lies and ,nrealistic e+pectations, the patholo$ical liar can o'ten attract a be)y o' new relationships b,t has tro,ble aintainin$ the . Bay be estran$ed 'ro 'a ily. 0'ter years o' bein$ lied to, 'a ily e bers ay not be )ery s,pporti)e or close to this indi)id,al.

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*nderstand that yo,5ll ne)er $et a consistent story when yo, talk with a patholo$ical liar. 0n indi)id,al who lies habit,ally will $enerally lose the ability to di''erentiate lies 'ro reality. <e or she will belie)e the lies to be the tr,th " akin$ con'rontin$ a patholo$ical liar on their lies nearly i possible. 0s a 'or er patholo$ical liar, it beco es )ery di''ic,lt to control. Bost responses are 8,ick and re'le+i)e, altho,$h ostly 'abricated. E)en co p,lsi)e liars ha)e tells that $i)e the lie away, $et yo,r 'riends to ask the liar a n, ber o' test 8,estions to discern their tell. Then call the liar o,t e)ery ti e he.s ca,$ht in a lie. E)ent,ally the liar ay start callin$ o,t his own lies ri$ht a'ter he tells the . 7e e ber these people $enerally ha)e low sel' estee , so i' they.re ca,$ht in a lie a 'ew ti es then it will deter the 'ro lyin$. 6eep in ind that patholo$ical liars typically e+a$$erate e)erythin$ they tell yo, so take their stories with a $rain o' salt. !o eone who consistently lies to yo, is a 'or o' disrespect22not so eone yo, want to tr,st or consider to be a tr,e 'riend. CBytho aniacC, Cco p,lsi)e liarC, Chabit,al liarC or Cchronic liarC are other na es ,sed 'or a patholo$ical liar. 1' yo, care abo,t the person, re ind the o'ten that they don.t ha)e to pretend to be per'ect. #oint o,t a 'ew o' yo,r own aweso e screw ,ps and 'ail,res in li'e. Try not to co pletely i$nore or .,n'riend. a chronic liar, their proble is ;,st liked any other, and it can beco e )ery lonely not ha)in$ any 'riends, and e)en lead to an+iety, and depression. Bost s,ccess',l people know how to ake their lies work thro,$ho,t their li)es. E)ery day they be$in with a new lie and e)ent,ally their lies kill their conscience and li'e beco es a drea .

&arnings

Do, can enco,ra$e so eone to $et therapy 'or lyin$ b,t yo, cannot ake the . 1n 'act, yo, ay ha)e a )ery hard ti e $ettin$ this person to accept that their lyin$ is e)en a proble , let alone so ethin$ in need o' therapy. 1' yo, s,spect the person is tellin$ a lie to co)er ,p ille$al acti)ity, consider contactin$ the a,thorities.

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"dit Sources and Citations

http://www.tr,thabo,tdeception.co /lyin$"and"deception/con'rontin$"a"partner/co p,lsi)e"lyin$/types" o'"liars.ht l 2 research so,rce

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Cate$ories: %ies and Fabrication 7ecent edits by: 0,peGariel, 7ock3HHHH, #hilosopherschro oso es