ow to improve emotional intelligence, EQ 8 ways to improve our intelligence can not be scheduled , but it can improve emotional intelligence,

an outstanding person may not have a high IQ , but it must have a high emotional intelligence . In fact, with a simple method for improving emotional intelligence they pass the line , you need to do is stick . 1, learn the proper psychological boundary delineation , which is good for everyone. You might think of unknown boundaries with others is a good thing , so that everyone can get along whim , but do not have the intense bargaining between each other . This sounds a little sense , but it's downside is that people often hurt your feelings but you do not know it . In fact, a closer look around you can easily find , easy- limits the ability of poor people suffering from morbid fear that they will not fight with the aggressor , and more willing to talk to a third party . If we are the psychological boundaries that infringes someone who found the truth , we will feel that he is a cold-blooded fool. We will feel hurt, because we both for their own fault and blame , but also finds fault but our outrage for a third volume to come . Boundaries clearly good for everyone . You have to understand what others can and can not do to you . When someone infringes your mental boundaries , and told him to seek correction. If you always draw clear psychological boundaries, then you need to improve their level of knowledge . 2 , to find a suitable way , in the irrational feeling about yourself calm down, so that the blood left in the brain, making rational action. Americans have joked : When something happens , sensible child so that the blood into the brain , to think wisely ; savage child let blood into the limbs, brain emptiness , crazy impulse. Yes, when the brain is full of blood , you sober , well behaved , on the contrary , when the blood flows to your extremities and tongue , you 'll do stupid things , impulsive temper , Koubuzeyan . In fact, the scientific evidence shows that when we become over-stretched , under pressure , the blood will indeed leave the cerebral cortex , so we 'll disoriented behavior . At this point, the nature of the brain of animals played a leading role in making us act like the most primitive animals that. You know, in a civilized society , act like a primitive animal will bring big trouble. There are many strategies to control emotional outbursts , one way is to pay attention to your heart rate , which is a measure of emotional precision ruler. When your heart beats faster than 100 beats per minute to rectify the mood is essential. At this rate , the body secretes epinephrine much more than usual . We will lose control and become aggressive cricket. When the blood began to flock to the limbs, you can use the following methods to calm the mood : 1 , take a deep breath , calm down until . Slowly inhale deeply , so that the gas fills the lungs. Put one hand on the abdomen , the right way to ensure that your breathing . 2 , himself. For example, say to yourself : "I'm calm ." Or: . " Everything will be over " 3 , some people using hydrotherapy. Wash a hot tub , you may make your anger and anxiety disappeared along with bath foam . 4 , you can also try the American psychologist Donald Aiden approach: ?

Thinking about unpleasant things , and put your finger on the forehead above the eyebrows , thumb his temples , deep breathing . According to Aydin said , doing just a few minutes , the blood will return to the cerebral cortex, you can more calmly think. 3, want to complain , pause to ask ourselves : " I want to continue to tolerate this situation does not seem to change it, or want to change it? " For the endless complaining , we call it nagging . Complained that consume hard but will not have any result , the problem of no use , and few make us feel good about that. Almost all of them have found that if a third party to talk to sympathetic wronged , and he will follow along with angry words , some of us will feel better . Someone said to you: . " Poor baby " It is a great consolation to you , you seem to alleviate the pressure , so you can re- face of the original situation , although things do not change anything. But if you do not complain about it, you will feel great psychological pressure . Sometimes the pressure is not a bad thing , yes, it may make you feel uncomfortable, but also motivates you to carry the power to change . Once the pressure is reduced, people are likely to maintain the status quo . However, if the pressure is not complaining about the loss , it will push up the plot reaches a limit , forcing you to take action to change the status quo. So , when you are ready to sympathize with a friend complained of you , first ask yourself : I want to reduce the pressure to maintain the status quo , or do you want me to change the pressure to continue to promote all this? If the former , then complain about the pressure off by it . Hourly Hou individuals have complain that it makes us feel better temporarily . But if the situation does need to change it, determined to take effective action now ! 4 , remove all waste energy thing . What is the power of emotional intelligence does not help us to improve it ? The answer is all of the things that waste energy . Many of the nervous system as long as his father 's hand a thick calluses . We have become accustomed to are not aware of the energy consumption. Energy is subtle, but can also appreciate the significant changes, such as when you hear the good news , adrenaline will surge , and when you hear the bad news , you will feel exhausted. We do not usually pay attention to the subtle energy consumption, such as getting along with a negative person , to find that piece of paper on the table and so on . What are the things that slow the energy consumption of your life there ? A corner of my house piled rugs, every time I see it , I would think someone might trip over it . This is not a big deal , but it distracts my attention . This is how we define distracting things ? ? After exposure will feel every effort has been dispersed . Sometimes friends which is true ? ? Each other learn and give energy ? ? But some are energy vampires , they will suck your energy . Then there are two options : one is to address this issue , create a psychological boundaries continue to be cautious dealings with them ; another is to reduce contact with such people . Indeed, we need to remove things slowly wasted effort , freed to focus on improving our emotional intelligence . Want to accelerate ? ? You can choose to increase or decrease the resistance of the driving force . Try the way we provide it: a regular list of things that drain your

energy . 2 , a systematic analysis of the list , and is divided into two parts : A, can make a difference . B, can not be changed. 3 , A single tackled the problem. For example, for me, the car keys hanging on a hook fixed , so you do not find everywhere . 4 , let's look at the problems B single , Are you sure ? There are some of them did not move A single could be resolved ? 5 , giving up a single B in question . 5 , to find a life in vivid example. We have all experienced the chronology of example , those noble example for us, but distant. So we learn a model and example of zeal in the distance gradually extinguished , because we know that maybe his life is no big hero. Yes, you can not become a great hero , but you can become a happy ordinary people , such as your friend tannins, her energetic , young, generous , smart, funny . She runs gynecology clinics, consultants, is a city of a regular column is written with a handsome husband and a lovely daughter. You have such outstanding figures around you, put him as your example ! You may think: She can do I can , but our styles, I could not in the way she completed what she had done . But I would imitate her to do some of the things to be done my way . From her you can always see never aware of their own potential . People around to find out you learn from it ! Although they are smarter than you , better education suffered a higher level than you more stamina . You will catch them in the process of naturally improve their emotional intelligence . 6 , parenting . Parents can teach you many things. When the child screamed , " Why do not you buy me ? I hate you ! ", You can not despair, not rage, you need to understand and accept his extreme resentment reality. You know, it is best to give your child the best gift , of course, this hate not continue. Parenting is a win-win outcome. In the process of raising children , the children learned how to get along with not too mature young parents . As parents we are , in the suppression of our children's needs to meet the needs of the process polished the edges . Parenting will automatically improve our emotional intelligence, so that we become more qualified parents. If you do not want to have children , try as a friend to see the children , along with their children can truly improve our emotional intelligence . 7 , from difficult people learned something . We have a lot of grumbling around , tyranny , installed guts for powerful people , and we wish these people disappear from your life , because they will make people angry and desperate , and even mad . Why can not these people ring up , buy a ticket, sent on an island , where they never bother to others. But best not so difficult to get along with these people help us to improve emotional intelligence . You can learn from people who talkative silence from grumpy people who learn patience , learn good from the wicked , and you do not feel grateful to these teachers . And, you define the " difficult people " might just turn out to be different from your people, and the so-called hard to get along with people, you are also difficult to get along with people . Difficult to get along with people cope with the most effective way is flexible. In other words, find their way in the process of interaction with them , as far as possible with the flexibility to adopt

the same approach. If people prefer to chat to talk down to business , then your response should be to relax , talk about family . On the other hand , if this person straightforward , you should also further ado, straight to the point . Thus, when dealing with difficult people will be more efficient, but will find that these people are not so difficult to get along with. The second point to cope with difficult people is to treat them as a gift. Judy married a domineering man. Marital life is full of ups and downs for her, because she did not very clear boundaries . After the break up for many years, she learned to thank him, because he taught her the importance of establishing and maintaining boundaries. Now when we encounter such a man, she did not care. Judy said: "When he lived with them in the future with these guys and you will simply not looked down on ." If she was going to marry a man , she may now no clear boundaries, it is difficult to deal with those tough guys. However, if you can choose , then perhaps we would never choose difficult people . 8 , from time to time to try an entirely different way , you will broaden horizons and improve emotional intelligence . Are you an introvert or extrovert and cheerful personality, just like being alone and a few close friends or with people? Do you like to plan ahead every day, to know what they are doing things , or have no plans to do ? Everyone has their own preference , if you can choose, everyone would prefer to choose their own way . Suddenly, however, the routine, try the opposite action would be more useful to our growth. If you're always keen to do gatherings central figure , this changed it, trying to get those people out of the limelight normally unassuming . If you always passively waiting for someone else and you strike up a conversation , took the initiative to the other party might well ask . When to break the routine, most of the high- low EQ EQ VS scientists found that parts of the brain that controls emotions ( limbic system ) impaired people , can be very clear and logical way of reasoning and thinking , but the decisions made are very low . Scientists therefore concluded that , when thinking part of the brain and emotion to the phase separation , the brain can not work properly. In making normal human behavior , is the integrated use of the two parts of the brain , namely the emotional part and the logic part . A high EQ people will be utilization of the various parts of the brain , and to use its portion of the cerebral cortex in most cases . High EQ respect for human rights and dignity of all people. Not to impose their own values . Have a clear understanding of their own , can withstand the pressure . Confident but not complacent. Good personal relations . Good at dealing with various aspects of life in the encounter. High EQ is responsible " good" citizens. Self-esteem. Independent personality , but in some cases vulnerable to others anxiety infection. More confident and not be complacent. Better relationships. Can deal with most of the problems. Low EQ easily influenced by others , their goals are not clear. Those who are good at forgiving than the low EQ can control the brain. Less able to cope with anxiety . The self-esteem based on the identity of others . The lack of a firm sense of self. Poor interpersonal relationships . Low EQ self-awareness is poor. No definite goal , do not intend to put into practice. Heavily dependent on others. Poor interpersonal skills . Anxiety poor response . Disorderly life . No sense of responsibility , love to complain.

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