Castillo 1 Karina Castillo Ms. Gardner English 2 15 January 2014 Beneath the Mask I woke u late. !er"e#t.

I sli ed into a skirt and $el$et $est% #o&"orta'le enough "or dan#ing 'ut "ashiona'le so I didn(t look ho&eless during &y #all 'a#k. I hurried to the 'athroo&. )hen I s#ree#hed to a sto at the 'athroo& #ounter% I stared ho elessly into the "a#e o" &y &irror**or rather% &y ine$ita'le destiny. +,-. ,o/ no% no% no.0 I re eated to &ysel" endlessly. I rodded% atte& ting to ull o"" the "laky dead skin whi#h was gra ling to &y "a#e. I oked at the red% "iery% terri'le $ol#ano o" a 1it on &y #hin and #ursed at it% like i" I yelled loud enough it &ight start #rying and run away. 2ike it &ight lea$e &e in ea#e. But sadly% it did not. 3he stress "ro& &y week had 'u''led u under &y skin and was "inally e&erging "ro& its #age with "ero#ity. 3he 1it &er#ilessly e4 osed the strain on &y &ind that I had so des erately atte& ted to #on#eal. It #a&e out in red 'u& s on &y #hin% &y "orehead% &y ar&s% &y 'a#k% and e$en &y #hest. I should 'e "ree o" i& les% dis#oloring% and hair "or this one day% "or &y 'ig #all'a#k "or the &ain role in what see&ed to 'e the &ost i& ortant rodu#tion o" &y teenage li"e. 5ight6 I su ose not. I was running late% and there was no ti&e to win this 'attle against &ysel"% so I lugged &y ear 'uds in and layed +5e"le#tion%0 &y audition song% on re eat. I e4#hanged &y skirt "or a sa"er #hoi#e7 loose ants to #o$er u &y ri#kly legs. I also #hanged into a long*

Castillo 2 slee$e shirt to #on#eal &y 'u& y ar&s% and then I headed to the 'athroo& to #o$er &y 'le&ished "a#e. 5ight when I a& a'out to a ly &y #o$er*u I 'egan to sing along to &y &usi#% +/i" I wear a &ask I #an "ool the world% 'ut I #annot "ool &y heart.0 I sto ed% and stood staring at &y "a#e8 &y red% dry% sensiti$e% 'u& y "a#e in sho#k. 9ho#k

that I had 'een so a'sor'ed in "itting what &edia tells &e looks good that I lost all sel"* a re#iation. I was so 'usy thinking o" what 'eauty was +su osed0 to look like a##ording to

tele$ision% that I had lost all estee& "or &y skin. I reali1ed I was% in "a#t% wearing a literal &ask o" #rea&s and &ake*u s whi#h #on#ealed what &y re"le#tion &ay re$eal a'out who was inside. My skin% "ro& the a er thin sheets o" &y eaked nose to the solid 'lo#ks o" #ra#ky #ur$es on &y heels% weighs eight ounds. Ele&entary% yet so "as#inating. 3he #ase that holds &y $ery 'eing% I had ne$er "elt its true gra$ity weighing &e down. I re&e&'er learning that the skin was the largest organ in the hu&an 'ody% 'ut &y skin see&ed so useless I don(t like to think &y skin is all that i& ortant% 'ut it is in reality a &ost $ital organ. I($e always hated it% yet I attend to it with su#h #are% as so &any other wo&en do. 3ake a look at &y 'athroo&7 littered with Clini:ue #o$er*u % $arious 'ottles o" +re;u$enating0 and +#leansing0 "a#e wash% dee &oisturi1ing lotions% !ure 9ilk sha$ing #rea&% res#ri'ed "a#e and 'ody lotions% and &edi#ation "or the na&eless little red 'u& s on &y ar&s. <ll "or what6 3o lease the &edia that has "or#ed ideas o" wo&en(s or#elain skin and a glowing "a#es into &y &ind6 ,o% to lease &ysel". 3o lease a &edia I ha$e allowed &ysel" to 'elie$e. I had 'een lying to &y heart to a ease to &y i&age% 'ut it only hurt &e in the end. I 'elie$ed in the unattaina'le i&age o" 'le&ishless% hairless% lu& less skin% so when I e4a&ined &ysel"**'lond hairy ar&s% 'lush dis#olored skin% a#ne% s#ars% lu& y thighs% "re#kles% "laky skin** I #ould not hel 'ut hate it.

Castillo = I re&e&'er when I was young I held a assionate hate in &y heart "or the skin on &y "eet. >ro& the $ery 'eginning o" &y li"e% the skin o" &y "oundation**&y "eet** was against &e. 9hortly a"ter 'irth% I was diagnosed with &ild e#1e&a% or +<to i# der&atitis** < non#ontiguous in"la&&ation o" the skin% #hara#teri1ed #hie"ly 'y redness% it#hing% and the out'reak o" lesions that &ay dis#harge serous &atter and 'e#o&e en#rusted and s#aly.0 ,ow% &y #ase o" e#1e&a was% and still is% &ild. 3his &eans that I will "ore$er ha$e dry% red% "laky "eet #oated with dead skin and o##asional little 'u& s. ,othing horri'le to look at any longer% 'ut when I was young8 &y skin warred against &y wish to tra$el the world without the #o& anionshi o" &y shoes. My "eet would 'e#o&e so dry that the #reases o" &y toes would #ra#k ain"ully and 'leed &er#ilessly until I was on the $erge o" tears. 5e:uired to sit idly and wat#h the other kids run around on the ro#ks and sand% and I would wait "or &y wounds to heal. 3his ha ened #ontinuously through &y whole #hildhood% 'ut as I grew older% I grew to a re#iate &y skin. I grew to a re#iate &y genes "or &aking &y "eet #hroni#ally dry instead gi$ing &e the 'urden o" asth&a ast the age o" si4. )hen I would sit% waiting "or &y toes to heal% I would wonder how they did it. I would wonder how the ga 'etween one side o" the 'reak in &y skin and the other grew 'a#k together. I asked &y "ather% &y sour#e o" all knowledge?&y en#y#lo edia whi#h held a hel "ul +kid talk0 "eature. +)ell%0 he 'egan +there are these little% u&% 'odies #alled skin #ells that are like #onstru#tion workers whi#h re'uild the 'ridge 'etween the two arts o" skin to "ill the #ut. >irst they #reate a "ra&e "or the 'ridge% the s#a'% and then they &ake it retty again 'y rea lying a #oat o" aint the #olor o" skin. Make sense60 I told hi& yes% 'ut it did not &ake sense to &e at the ti&e.

Castillo 4 I slowly aged% and &y #uts slowly healed% and they soon disa eared a"ter years o" #are"ul a li#ations o" lotion and $ast a&ounts o" so#ks. I o"ten #onte& lated the idea o" the skin #ells whi#h hel ed heal &e% and I reali1ed that like anything else with ti&e and #are skin heals itsel". 3he skin #ells are the skin. 9kin does not need hel "ro& anyone 'ut its #arrier to heal. 9kin takes ti&e% #are% and atien#e to heal itsel". It has regenerati$e ro erties and e$en re lenishes itsel" #o& letely in only se$en years. @owe$er% ;ust like how a #ru& led ie#e o" a er% #an ne$er truly 'e "lat again% skin will always has its i& er"e#tions7 dryness% dis#oloring% and s#ars. 3hese i& er"e#tions are not 'urdens% 'ut gi"ts. 3he i& er"e#tions hold &e&ories o" #lu&sy adoles#en#e whi#h led to raised "a#ial s#ars% ad$entures in the Mediterranean whi#h led to a ur le knee s#ar% and a hal" in#h el'ow s#ar "ro& water skiing in 2ake Mendo#ino o$er the su&&er. )hen I look at &y $inyl re#ord #o$ers and see the or#elain% s&ooth skin o" @aley )illia&(s "a#e and the tan er"e#tion o" Ingrid Mi#helson(s% I still #annot hel 'ut long "or su#h "lawless skin% 'ut I know it #annot 'e true. True skin% the true #o$er o" any soul will 'e &arked with $ast 'odies o" watery s&oothness% "orests o" 'ushy hair% high &ountains o" 'u& s and 'le&ishes% dee $alley ores% and yes% dry #ra#ked desert terrains?ea#h i& ortant to the di$ersity o" the world skin holds. 3he oint o" $iew in whi#h you #hoose to see your own i&age #an #hange the world around you. I was no longer asking &y &ake*u #aked "a#e and #lothing*#o$ered skin +)hen will &y re"le#tion show who I a& inside60 I #ould e&'ra#e &y 'are% healthily &oisturi1ed "a#e% and o ening &ysel" u to a world o" ossi'ility% o" "lying #ar ets% +< whole new world% and a da11ling la#e I ne$er knew.0 It was "inally #lear that% ;ust like in &y adoles#en#e% i" I allowed

Castillo 5 &y skin to 'e the way it was &eant to 'e and hel ed it deli#ately8 it #ould re$eal &y true sel". 3he +&e0 underneath &y skin #ould "inally 'e re$ealed on the outside "ro& underneath the &ask.

Castillo A

Works Cited +E#1e&a.0 The Free Dictionary. >arle4% In#. )e'. 21 January. 201=. +@ow Mu#h Boes 9kin )eigh6.0 Reference.com. Bi#tionary.#o&% 22C. )e'. 21 January. 201=. +Mulan* 5e"le#tion 2yri#s.0 Lyrics Mode. 2yri#s Mode. )e'. 21 January. 201=. 9alonga% 2ea. +< )hole ,ew )orld C>ro& <laddinD.0 Lyrics Mode. 2yri#s Mode. )e'. 21 January. 201=. +)hat is the largest organ in the hu&an 'ody6.0 Cliff Notes. @oughton Mi""lin @ar#ourt. )e'. 21 January. 201=.