Emily Cole

April 2014

feel nervous when I speak English, but when I speak English with you I feel very happy. We were standing in my halfoutdoor Chinese kitchen where my students had insisted on helping clean up. (We like to wash dishes, one of them had said, It reminds me of being at home.) Maybe you feel more comfortable speaking English with me because Im your teacher. I replied. Maybe the girl said. I think its because you smile at us. Her friend joined in on the conversation. We think you are very happy. I laughed and replied honestly, Im not always happy. Not always happy, but maybe its she paused to speak Chinese to the other girls. Outlook. Another girl chimed in to translate. Yes, outlook. She agreed. Her words were familiar to me, as Id had similar conversations before with other students and it always surprised me a little to hear it. Last semester was rough and life, culture, teaching, and general busyness broke me many times. This happiness they spoke of felt so far away.
An eclectic mix of students from all my classes.

My student, Melody, and me with the cookies for Coffee House.

But joy rises like the sun in the morning; it breaks through smog covers and jumps from one building to another. Yesterdays rain left puddles and to the sun, they are like glass mirrors. This city with its skyline of cranes and newfound worship of big business and skyscrapers cannot block out the sun though it often tries. This city in all its dust and mud,

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my students living under impossible expectationsthey are being forced to grow and so am I. In September I asked Him to teach me how to love my students and when December came I wasnt sure that I ever could. But piece-by-piece hes dismantled my resistance to change so that Im able to see the true nature of this new chapter and its beauty overwhelms me. These days I find myself grasping at moments that are quickly passing knowing that my time in this city, my time with these students, will be over far more quickly than I couldve imagined eight months ago. Its hard for me to picture life without the students Ive come to love so dearly. I often wish that you, the people who mean so much to me, could experience life with me here the busyness of the sidewalk on sunny days, the crowded buses on basically every day, birthday celebrations with teammates, Chinese lessons with my dear friend Lucy, the hilarious conversations that happen on Tuesday mornings with Class 1, and the always-confusing Chinglish that happens on Wednesday mornings with Business English 1; between the chaos of misunderstood classroom direction and the calm of much needed heart-to-hearts I find myself trusting more deeply in the words of our Father to not fear nor be anxious nor dismayed. This year has taken me down a bumpy road leading to my decision to continue working with ELIC in China. It felt like it was a confusing process to get here, but He has given me so much peace regarding my decision to stay. I dont know exactly what the future holds, where Ill be living in September or what school Ill be teaching at,

My team and our friend, Lan Hui, surprised our teammate, David, for his birthday!

but I do know that He is faithful, He is loving, and He is worth every bad China day, every frustrating classroom moment, every day that I miss home more than words can express. He is my strength and my shield, my salvation and stronghold. Thank you so much for your continued thoughts and support. I am so grateful that He has put each of you in my life and I know that He has used you so often to help me get through the difficult days, weeks, or months. Apart from the Father himself, you are my biggest blessing. Grace and Peace,

Emily Cole Jiangxi University of Technology Yao Hu University Campus Area 115 Ziyang Road Nanchang, Jiangxi 330098 330098 115 PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA