The Sound of Silence

From the book Intuitive Awareness (page 85)

Somebody referred to the sound of sien!e as a !osmi! hum" a s!intiating
amost ee!tri! ba!kground sound# $ven though it%s going on a the time we
don%t generay noti!e it" but when your mind is open and rea&ed you begin to
hear it# I found this a very usefu referen!e be!ause in order to hear it" to noti!e
it" you have to be in a rea&ed state of awareness# 'eope try to find this on a
des!riptiona eve# (hey go on a ten day retreat trying to find the sound of
sien!e and then they say I !an%t hear it" what%s wrong with me)
(hey are trying to find some thing# *ut it%s not some thing you have to find +
rather you ,ust open to it- it%s the abiity to isten" with your mind in a re!eptive
state" whi!h makes it possibe to hear the sound of sien!e#
.ou%re not trying to sove any probems but ,ust istening# .ou%re putting your
mind into a state of re!eptive awareness# It%s awareness that is wiing to
re!eive whatever is" and one of the things you begin to re!ognise in that" is the
sound of sien!e#
Some peope be!ome averse to the sound of sien!e#
/ne woman started hearing it and she wanted it to stop" so she resisted it# She
said" I used to have pea!efu meditations# 0ow a I hear is that basted
sound and I%m trying to stop it#
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*efore I never heard it" now I sit down and immediatey I hear 1111# She was
!reating aversion toward the way it is- I don%t want that# She was !reating
suffering around the sound of sien!e# 2ather than !reating suffering" the sound
of sien!e !an hep to fo!us the mind" be!ause when aware of it" the mind is in a
very e&panded state# (his state of mind is one whi!h we!omes whatever arises
in !ons!iousness3 it%s not a state where your are e&!uding anything# (he sound
of sien!e is ike infinite spa!e be!ause it in!udes a other sounds" everything"
it gives a sense of e&pansion" unimitedness" infinity#
/ther sounds !ome and go" !hange and move a!!ordingy but it is ike a
!ontinuum" a stream#
I was on!e giving a retreat in 4hang 5ai" 0orthern (haiand" in a ovey
mountain resort with a waterfa and stream# (he meditation ha had been buit
right by the stream and the sound of the waterfa was !ontinuous and 6uite
oud# Somebody on the retreat be!ame very averse to the sound of the stream"
I !an%t meditate here" it%s too noisy3 the sound of the stream is ,ust too mu!h" I
!an%t bear it# .ou !an either isten to and open your mind to the sound" or resist
it" in whi!h !ase you are fighting and resisting" and that !reates suffering#
I noti!ed the sound of the waterfa and the stream#
(he sound of sien!e was in the ba!kground as we#
In fa!t the sound of sien!e be!ame the stronger and more obvious sound but it
did not obiterate the sound of the stream" they worked together# (he sound of
the stream did not obiterate or !over up the sound of sien!e#
So it%s ike a radar# (he mind is in a very wide" e&pansive state of awareness-
in!uding open to and re!eptive" rather than shut off" !osed and !ontroed#
So noti!e this and !ontempate this e&perien!e and then ,ust !on!entrate your
attention on the sound of sien!e# If you think about it" think of it in terms of
being ike a bessing" gra!e" or a ovey kind of feeing" of being opened" rather
than as a bu11 in the ear" in whi!h !ase you think that its tinnitus or some
diseases# If you start !ontempating it as the sound of anges" a !osmi! or
primordia sound" bessing every moment as we open to it" we then fee this
sense of being bessed# So refe!ting in this way" in a positive way toward it"
heps us to take an interest in it and get a good feeing from it#
7istening to the sound of sien!e you !an begin to !ontempate non8thinking"
be!ause when you are ,ust istening to the !osmi! sound" there is no thought"
it%s ike this" emptiness" no8sef#
9hen you%re ,ust with the !osmi! sound aone" there is pure attention" there
is no sense of a person or personaity" of me and mine#
(his points to anatt: (not8sef)#
2ea& into the sound" don%t try to for!e attention onto it# ;ust have a sense of
rea&ing and resting" pea!efuness# (ry !ounting to say" ten to sustain
istening to the sound of sien!e# <one" two" three ### nine"ten#% (he mind is not
used to resting in that way" it%s used to thinking and to restess menta a!tivities#
It takes a whie to !am" to rea& and to rest in this sien!e of the mind#
In the sien!e" you !an aso be aware of any emotions that arise# It%s not an
annihiating emptiness" it%s not a sterie nothingness" it%s fu and embra!ing#
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.ou !an be aware of the movements of emotions" doubts" memories or feeings
that start to be!ome !ons!ious#
It embra!es them" it%s not ,udging them" resisting or even being fas!inated with
them# It%s ,ust re!ogni1ing and reai1ing the way it is#
9e tend to use the word <sound% in terms of how the mind has been
per!eptuay !onditioned# 9e !onne!t sound with the ears# (hat%s why the
sound of sien!e is heard as if it were a bu11ing in the ears" be!ause the
impression of sound is aways !onne!ted with the ears# *ut you !an pug your
ears up and you !an sti hear it# 9hen you%re swimming under water you !an
sti hear it# So what is it)
(hen you start to reai1e that it%s everywhere and not ,ust in the ears# (hat
per!eption of the sound of sien!e being heard in the ears is the same
misper!eption as thinking that the mind is in the brain#
.ou%re !hanging from that very !onditioned way of e&perien!ing ife" whi!h
arises through this sense of sef and the !uturay !onditioned attitudes we hod"
to a mu!h wider understanding of the way it is#
It%s ike the per!eption of the mind as being in the body#
(hrough intuitive awareness we !an see that the body is in the mind# 2ight now
you are in my mind3 a of you in this ha" you%re in the mind# /n the
!onventiona eve" for ea!h one of us our mind is in our head + you%re sitting
over there with a mind in your head + a these different heads with minds in
them# *ut then in terms of mind" I%m sitting here on the high seat" I !an see you
with my eyes" and you%re in the mind" you%re not in my head# I !an%t say you%re
a in my brain#
(he mind has no imit to it#
So then one !an see that the body is more ike a radio" more ike a !ons!ious
entity in the universe that pi!ks up things# *eing born as a separate entity in the
universe" we are a point of ight" we are a !ons!ious being in a separate form#
9e tend to assume we are a fi&ed person" a soid physi!a person but are we
something greater than that + not so imited" heavy and fi&ed as our !utura
!onditioning makes it sound" or as we tend to per!eive it#
(he sound of sien!e isn%t mine" nor is it in my head" but this form is abe to
re!ogni1e it and know things as they are# (his knowing is not a !utura
knowing" it%s not ike interpreting everything from my !utura !onditioning3 it%s
seeing things as they are" in a dire!t way" whi!h is not dependent on !utura
attitudes# So we reay begin to understand anatt: (not8sef)" whi!h enabes us
to see that we are a !onne!ted" we are one# 9e are not" as we appear to be" a
!oe!tion of totay separate entities3 if you start !ontempating ike this" you
begin to e&pand your awareness to in!ude rather than to define#
So in terms of meditation" we are estabishing awareness in the present"
!oe!ting" re!oe!ting" !ontempating one8pointedness in the present + the
body" the breath" the sound of sien!e# (hen we !an bring to this an attitude of
mett: (oving8kindness)" whi!h is a way of reating to and re!ogni1ing
!onditioned phenomena without ,udging them#
9ithout this attitude we tend to make vaue8,udgements about what we
e&perien!e on a persona eve# /ne person is feeing pea!e" another person is
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feeing restess" another person is feeing inspired" another person is feeing
bored" another person high" another ow3 or you%re having good or bad
thoughts" stupid or usefu thoughts" whi!h are ,udgments about the 6uaity of
the e&perien!e that ea!h one of us is having# In terms of knowing" we are
knowing that thought is a !onditioned arising and !easing# $ven
bad thoughts or horribe thoughts arise and !ease" ,ust ike good thoughts# It%s
not a matter of passing ,udgement about how bad you are be!ause you are
having bad thoughts" it%s about the abiity to re!ognise thought" and to see that
the nature of thought is impermanent" !hanging" not8sef# So now ,ust use this
!osmi! hum" this gente stream of fowing s!intiating sound# ;ust get famiiar
with it#
Sometimes with emotiona e&perien!e we !an get wound up about something
and sometimes have strong emotiona feeings su!h as being indignant or
upset + I%m not standing for that3 I%ve had enough#
9hen that happens" go into the sound of sien!e and !ount to five" to ten" and
see what happens#
$&periment with it" right at this moment# I%m totay fed up" I%ve had enough"
this is it= (hen go into the sien!e# I used to ike to pay with this" when I used to
suffer from indignation" e&asperation and being fed up# I ike that word <fed8up%"
you !an say it with su!h !onvi!tion#
(his !osmi! sound" the sound of sien!e" is reay a natura sound# (hat%s why
when you earn to rest with it" it%s sustainabe3 it%s not !reated by you# It%s not ike
you%re !reating a refined state that depends on !onditions to support it# (o
sustain any kind of refined state you have to have very refined !onditions
supporting it# .ou !an%t have !oarse" noisy" rau!ous" nasty things happening
and sti sustain a sense of refinement in your mind# (o have a refined menta
state you have to have sien!e" few demands" no noise" no distra!tions" no
6uarreing" wars" e&posions" ,ust a very ovey s!ene where everything is very
pre!ious and !ontroed# 9hen we get into that state" we !an get very pre!ious#
$verybody whispers to ea!h other in gente tones# (hen when somebody says
agh it reay shatters us and we get very upset be!ause we have be!ome so
sensitive# 9ith the sound of sien!e" you begin to hear it wherever you are + in
the midde of 7ondon" in a traffi! ,am in *angkok" in a heated argument with
somebody" when the !hainsaw is going" when the pneumati! dri" the awn
mower and the !hain saw are going at the same time" even when there is
musi!= So earning to dete!t it and tuning into it is ike a !haenge#
Sometimes peope say- I !an%t hear it3 there%s too mu!h noise# If you are
resisting the noise you !an%t hear the sound of sien!e" but if you open to it then
you begin to hear the gente s!intiating hum" even with the pneumati! dri
basting away#
7istening to the sound of sien!e aows us to integrate mindfuness>meditation
into movement" work" business# If you are in the kit!hen washing dishes"
waking from here ba!k to your room or driving a !ar" you are abe to isten to
the sound of sien!e at the same time# It does not make you heedess# It aows
you to be fuy with what you are doing# It is not a distra!ting thing that makes
you heedess when you are washing the dishes" it in!reases your mindfuness#
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It heps you to wash the dishes fuy and reay be with the washing of the
dishes" rather than ,ust washing the dishes and being with a kinds of other
things#
9hen you%re waking from here ba!k to your room" you !oud be thinking about
everything ese" but using the sound of sien!e heps you to be with waking"
being mindfu and with the very a!tion that%s happening in the present#
Sometimes this sound of sien!e wi be!ome very oud and 6uite unpeasant"
but it won%t stay that way# I remember one time it was in!rediby oud" ear8
spitting# I thought something%s going wrong# (hen it !hanged and I tried to get
it oud again and !oudn%t#
It%s not something that is dangerous# It depends how you ook at it" If you resist
it or are negative to it" you%re !reating that negativity towards it# If you rea& and
open" then you fee this genty s!intiating ba!kground sound that is pea!efu"
!aming and restfu# .ou begin to re!ognise emptiness + it%s not some vague
idea that if you pra!tise meditation you might e&perien!e emptiness some day#
It%s not a vague kind of thing" its very dire!t#
(hen in that emptiness !ontempate what <sef% is#
9hen you be!ome a personaity what happens) .ou start thinking" grasping
your feeings" then you be!ome a monk or nun" man or woman" a personaity"
'is!es" Aries" an Asian or a $uropean" an Ameri!an" od man" young woman" or
whatever# It%s through thinking" grasping at the khandhas" that we start getting
wound up into that" and then we be!ome something# *ut in this emptiness there
is no nationaity# It%s a pure inteigen!e" it does not beong to anybody or any
group# So then you start re!ognising when you%ve be!ome somebody and
nobody" when there is att: and anatt:#
In the emptiness there is no8sef" no 4armen 4ismas right now# *ut I want to
te you about my persona history and a my 6uaifi!ations and my
a!hievements in the hoy ife over the past thirty8three years# I%m farma!ist
of the ?i1iru" !onsidered a <?I*%" very important bussiness8woman and I want
you to respe!t me and treat me propery be!ause you get a ot of merit for being
kind to od peope= (hat%s 4rmen== /r" you don%t have to respe!t me at a" it
does not matter to me in the sightest I !an take it if you don%t ike me" or if you
!riti!ise me and find faut with me" it%s okay" I%m 6uite wiing to bear it be!ause
I%ve sa!rifi!ed a ot for a of you" but that%s 4armen again# *orn again and then
gone= + $mpty#
;ust by e&poring this you reay get to understand what a tt: (sef) is" how you
be!ome a personaity and aso to see that when there is no person there is sti
awareness# It%s an inteigent awareness3 it%s not an un!ons!ious du stupidity"
it%s a bright" !ear" inteigent emptiness# 9hen you be!ome a personaity
through having thoughts ike- feeing sorry for yoursef" views and opinions" sef8
!riti!ism and so forth" and then it stops + there is the sien!e# *ut sti the
sien!e is bright and !ear" inteigent# I prefer this sien!e rather than this
endess proiferating nattering that goes on in the mind#
I used to have what I !a an <inner tyrant%" a bad habit that I pi!ked up of aways
!riti!ising mysef# It%s a rea tyrant + there is nobody in this word that has been
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more tyranni!a" !riti!a or nasty to me than I have#
$ven the most !riti!a person" however mu!h they have harmed and made me
miserabe" has never made me reentessy miserabe as mu!h as I have
mysef" as a resut of this inner tyrant# It%s a rea wet banket of a tyrant" no
matter what I do it%s never good enough#
$ven if everybody says" A,ahn Sumedho" you gave su!h a wonderfu desan:
(a dhamma tak)" the inner tyrant says .ou shoudn%t have said this" you didn%t
say that right# It goes on" in an endess perpetua tirade of !riti!ism and faut8
finding# .et it%s ,ust habit" I freed my mind from this habit" it does not have any
footing anymore# I know e&a!ty what it is" I no onger beieve in it" or even try to
get rid of it" I ,ust know not to pursue it and ,ust to et it dissove into the sien!e#
(hat%s a way of breaking a ot of these emotiona habits we have that pague us
and obsess our minds#
.ou !an a!tuay train your mind" not through re,e!tion or denia but through
understanding and !utivating this sien!e# So don%t use this sien!e as away of
annihiating or getting rid of what is arising in e&perien!e" but as a way of
resoving and iberating your mind from the obsessive thoughts and negative
attitudes that !an endessy pague !ons!ious e&perien!e#
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