Traditional Chinese marriage (Chinese: ; pinyin: hnyn) is a ceremonial ritual within

Chinese societies that involve a marriage established by pre-arrangement between families. Withi
n Chinese culture, romantic love was allowed, and monogamy was the norm for most ordinary citi
zens.
tymology!edit"
#n more ancient writings for the word , the former has the beside the radical (pin
yin: n$, literally %a female%). &his implies that the wedding ceremony is performed in the evening,
which is deemed as a time of fortune. 'imilarly, (pinyin: yn) has the same pronunciation as
(pinyin: yn). (ccording to )hang *i+s ,) Guangya Shigu (), a dictionary of
ancient Chinese characters, (pinyin: yn) means %friendliness%, %love% and %harmony%, indi
cating the correct way of living for a married couple.
-arriage in a Confucian conte.t!edit"
-ain article/ Confucian view of marriage
#n Confucian thought, marriage is of grave significance both to families and to society as well as b
eing important for the cultivation of virtue. &raditionally incest has been defined as marriage betw
een people with the same surname. 0rom the perspective of a Confucian family, marriage brings t
ogether families of different surnames and so continues the family line of the paternal clan. &his is
generally why having a boy is more preferred than a girl when giving birth. &herefore, the benefits
and demerits of any marriage are important to the entire family, not 1ust the individual couples. 'o
cially, the married couple is thought to be the basic unit of society. #n Chinese history there have b
een many times when marriages have affected the country2s political stability and international rel
ations. 0rom the 3an 4ynasty onward, the rulers of certain powerful foreign tribes such as the -o
ngolians, the -anchus, the 5iongnu, and the &ur6s demanded women from the #mperial family. -
any periods of Chinese history were dominated by the families of the wife or mother of the ruling
mperor.
&raditional marriage rituals
Chinese marriage became a custom between 789 and 99: ;C. 4espite China+s long history and
many different geographical areas, there are essentially si. rituals, generally 6nown as the three l
etters and si. eti<uettes ,). Unfortunately for some traditional families, the if
e!s mother cannot go to her son"in"la!s family until one year (according to the Chin
ese lunar calendar or Chinese #unar $e %ear) after the edding has elapsed. &o
e'er, during this one year the daughter can go bac( at anytime.
Si) eti*uettes+edit,
-roposal: .hen an unmarried boy!s parents found a potential daughter"in"la, they t
hen located a matchma(er hose /ob as to assuage the con0ict of interests and ge
neral embarrassments hen discussing the possibility of marriage on the part of to
families largely un(non to each other.
1irthdates: 2f the selected girl and her parents did not ob/ect to the proposal, the ma
tchma(er ould match the birthdates (Chinese: ; pinyin: ni3ng=ng b>z?@
literally/ %the A cyclic characters for year, month, day and hour of birth of a man, which determine
his fate%) in which suanming ,Chinese fortune telling) is used to predict the future of that couple-
to-be. #f the result of 'uan -ing was good, they then would go to the ne.t step, submitting bride
price.
;ride price ,;etrothal gifts)/ (t this point the bridegroom+s family arranged for the matchma6er to
present bride price ,betrothal gifts), including the betrothal letter, to the bride+s family.
Wedding gifts/ &he groom+s family would then send an elaborate array of food, ca6es, and
religious items to the bride+s family.
(rranging the wedding/ ;efore wedding ceremony, two families would arrange a wedding day
according to Chinese tung shing. 'electing an auspicious day to assure a good future for the
couple is as important as avoiding what is believed to be an unluc6y day. #n some cases there
may be no auspicious dates and the couple will have to review their potential date range.
Wedding Ceremony/ &he final ritual would be the actual wedding ceremony where bride and
groom become a married couple, which consists of many elaborate parts/
Wedding Brocession/ &he wedding procession from the bride+s home to the groom+s home
consists of a traditional band, the bride+s sedan, the maids of honor+s sedans ,if there are maids
of honor), and bride+s dowry in the forms other than money.
Welcoming the ;ride/ &he wedding procession of the bride+s family stops at the door of the
groom+s home. &here are ceremonies to be followed to welcome the bride and her wedding
procession into the groom+s home, which varies from locale to locale.
(ctual Wedding Ceremonies/ <uivalent to e.changing vows in the west, the couple would pay
respect to the Cade mperor, the family deities ,or buddhas and bodhisattvas), paying respect to
deceased ancestors, the bride and groom+s parents and other elders, and paying respect to each
other.
&he Wedding ;an<uets #n Chinese society, the wedding ban<uet is 6nown as .D-1Du ,, lit. /oy
ful ine), and is sometimes far more important than the actual edding itself. There
are ceremonies such as bride presenting ines or tea to parents, spouse, and guests.
2n modern eddings, the bride generally pic(s red (folloing Chinese tradition) or
hite (more .estern) for the edding, but most ill ear the red traditional garme
nt for their formal edding ban*uets. Traditionally, the groom is responsible for the
cost of the edding in'itation seet treats (often pastries), the ban*uet in'itations,
and the edding itself. .edding ban*uets are elaborate and consist usually of 4"56 c
ourses, ith ingredients such as shar(!s 7n, abalone, lobster, s*uab, sea cucumber, s
ift nests, 7sh roe in soup or as decoration on top of a dish to symboli8e fertility, an
d local delicacies. Traditionally, the father of the bride is responsible for the eddin
g ban*uet hosted on the bride!s side and the alcohol consumed during both ban*uet
s. The edding ban*uets are to separate ban*uets: the primary ban*uet is hosted
once at the bride!s side, the second ban*uet (smaller ban*uet) at the groom!s side.
.hile the edding itself is often based on the couple!s choices, the edding ban*ue
ts are a gesture of 9than(s9 and appreciation, to those that ha'e raised the bride an
d groom (such as grandparents and uncles). 2t is also to ensure the relati'es on each
side meet the relati'es on the other side. Thus out of respect for the elders, edding
ban*uets are usually done formally and traditionally, hich the older generation is t
hought to be more comfortable ith.
1efore modern times, omen ere not alloed to choose the person they married. 2
nstead, the family of the bride pic(ed the prospecti'e husband. :arriages ere chos
en based upon the needs of reproduction and honor, as ell as the need of the father
and husband.
:odern practices+edit,
2n :andarin Chinese, a mang nian, or !blind year!, hen there are no 7rst days of sp
ring, such as in year ;656, a year of the Tiger, is considered an ominous time to mar
ry or start a business.+;, 2n the preceding year, there ere to 7rst days of spring.
Since the late 5<<6s, it has become popular to create an elaborate edding album, o
ften ta(en at a photography studio.+=, The album usually consists of many pictures o
f the bride and groom ta(en at 'arious locations ith many di>erent out7ts. 2n Sing
apore, these out7ts often include edding out7ts belonging to di>erent cultures, inc
luding ?rab and @apanese edding out7ts.
2n contrast to .estern edding pictures, the Chinese edding album ill not contai
n pictures of the actual ceremony and edding itself.
2n recent years, Confucian edding rituals ha'e become popular among Chinese cou
ples. 2n such ceremonies, hich are a recent inno'ation ith no historic antecedent,
the bride and groom bo and pay respects to a large portrait of Confucius hanging i
n the ban*uet hall hile edding attendants and the couple themsel'es are dressed
in traditional Chinese robes.+A,
1efore the bride and groom enter the nuptial chambers, they e)change nuptial cups
and perform ceremonial bos as follos:+4,
7rst bo " &ea'en and Barth
second bo " ancestors
third bo " parents
fourth bo " spouse
? edding reception
is a party held after the completion of a marriage ceremony. 2t is held as hospitality f
or those ho ha'e attended the edding, hence the name reception: the couple rece
i'es society, in the form of family and friends, for the 7rst time as a married couple.
&osts pro'ide their choice of food and drin(, although a edding ca(e is popular. Bn
tertaining guests after a edding ceremony is traditional in most societies, and can l
ast anyhere from half an hour to many hours or e'en days.
2n some cultures, separate edding celebrations are held for the bride!s and groo
m!s families.
1efore receptionsCa social e'ent that is structured around a recei'ing line, and usu
ally held in the afternoon, ith only light refreshmentsCbecame popular, eddings
ere more typically celebrated ith edding brea(fasts (for those hose religious t
raditions encouraged morning eddings) and edding balls (for those ho ere ma
rried in the e'ening). The popularity of receptions, rather than brea(fasts, dinners,
and balls, during the ;6th century led to the name reception being applied to any so
cial e'ent after a edding, hether it is brunch, tea, dinner, or a dance.
Gifts+edit,
Unless the edding couple has a edding registry, it is best not to gi'e gifts or gift c
erti7cates. Dor Chinese eddings, cash or a che*ue is alays the best gift. 2n additio
n to that, some elder relati'es might also gi'e gold /eelry. The cash or che*ue shou
ld be in a red en'elope or red poc(et ith the gi'ers! names on it, and it is alays gi
'en hen signing in at the restaurant. 2n choosing the amount of money to gi'e, gi'e
rs scrupulously a'oid unluc(y numbers, such as A and fa'or combinations of luc(y n
umbers, such as E and <. ?lso, hite en'elopes are ne'er used to rap gifts for a e
dding or other /oyful e'ent, as the color hite is associated ith death.
Timing+edit,
There are to times listed on the in'itation: (greeting) and (reception). Typi
cally, they are at least to hours apart (some may be four hours). The 7rst one is the
time the groom and bride, along ith their family, ill be ready to recei'e guests an
d greet them; the second one is the time the receptionFban*uet ill start. The gap b
eteen those hours is referred to as entertainment time. Gery often, the restaurant
ill pro'ide po(er and m3/iHng () for gambling; the time can also be used to soci
ali8e ith other guests and ta(e photos ith the brideFgroom and their families. $o
adays, in the U.S., you are less li(ely to see m3/iHng being played before the ban*u
et; it is often replaced by a coc(tail party. &oe'er, if the edding reception ta(es p
lace in southern China, &ong Iong, :acau, and e'en parts of Canada (here there i
s a large Cantonese population), m3/iHng might still be played before the dinner.
Sign"in+edit,
Gifts of money may be placed in a special bo) at the sign"in table.
To people ill be at the sign"in tables (one from the brideJs family and one from th
e groomJs) to register guests and recei'e giftsFred en'elopes. Kften, they ill ha'e t
o separate guest lists, one from the groomJs side and one from the brideJs. Then th
e best man and the maid of honor ill direct ushers to escort guests to their seat.
1an*uet procedure+edit,
Typically, the ban*uet ill include a speech from the parents, the best man, the mai
d of honor, and the guest spea(er. There ill be ca(e cutting, toasts, a tea ceremony,
+54, some games designed by the L@, and dancing. The to tables at the center of th
e room are for the groomJs and brideJs families.
Dood+edit,
? Chinese edding reception typically has nine or ten courses. B)pensi'e dishes suc
h as shar( 7n, abalone, lobster, /umbo shrimp, s*uab, sea bass, or sea cucumber are
common on a edding ban*uet menu.
? hole 7sh, chic(en, or pig means luc( and completeness in Chinese edding cultu
re.
Traditionally, after the 7fth dish of the dinner, the groom and bride and their familie
s ill approach each table to toast the guests. Gery often, the bride ill change into
a traditional Chinese red edding dress (, or *Mp3o) at that time, if she has been
earing a di>erent style of clothing before.
Guests are elcome to ta(e lefto'ers home. Ta(ing home the remaining food indicat
es appreciation of the groom and brideJs choice of food.
?bout tenty minutes after the tenth (last) dish is ser'ed, the groom and bride, alon
g ith their families, ill line up at the entranceFe)it to bid the guests fareell and t
han( them for coming. 2t is not polite to lea'e before the last dish is ser'ed.