MOON DRAGON

Anne Hampson



"Women need a little rough treatment!"

Renny listened to her husband's uncompromising statement in
silence. Carl's angry cynicism was hardly surprising.

Eight years before, she had responded to his kindness by deserting
him on their wedding day. Now she had come to Singapore to ask
Carl for a divorce, so that she could remarry.

But incredibly, Renny found herself drawn to Carl's powerful,
magnetic personality like a moth to flame. Could she extricate herself
from this potentially dangerous situation? Or would her love be the
weapon by which he would vengefully destroy her?


CHAPTER ONE
RENNY COLBERT stood against the window and peered across the
valley to the austere majesty of the snow-clad hills beyond. The sky
was ominously dark, the valley veiled in shadows.
'There'll be more snow,' she predicted, turning to face the cosy room.
'I suppose it can be expected at this time of the year.' Her brown eyes,
large and clear beneath a high, unlined forehead, stared pensively into
the flames sent up from the pine-logs burning in the grate. The
fair-haired girl in the chair glanced up, but her hands remained busy
with a pair of knitting needles. 'Shall we have snow at Christmas, I
wonder?' Renny stirred restlessly as she spoke, and moved away from
the window.
'Sunshine, probably, with the vagaries of our weatheror should it
be climate?' The girl who spoke was Renny's flat-mate, who had
come to share the expenses four years ago when, owing to a
substantial increase in her rent, Renny had advertised for someone to
share the flat which, occupying the first floor of a small manor house
that had long since been converted into two dwellings, commanded
magnificent views from almost every window. But today the aspect
was depressing and, unfortunately, very much in keeping with
Renny's mood.
'Clare,' she said decisively, 'I want to talkno, not just to talk, but to
confide. There comes a time in one's life when the skeleton in the
cupboard becomes oppressive.'
'Fire away.' invited Clare unconcernedly and Renny had to smile. In
all the four years she had known Clare she had never seen her
ruffledno, not even when cows strayed into their little vegetable
garden and ate the sprouts and cauliflowers right down to the stalks.
'If you've something on your mind then it'll be good for you to confide
in old Clare here. After all, I am your senior, if only by a month and
three days.'
'You don't look twenty-six,' remarked Renny, for the moment
diverted from what was pressing on her mind.
'Neither do you, for that matter.' Clare laid aside her knitting and
looked up into her friend's face. It was an arresting face with firm,
classical lines, and yet by some subtle etching of the contours there
had emerged a certain softness which was reflected in the gentle
expression which invariably looked out of her eyes. The wide mouth
spelt compassion and, like the eyes, there was a mysterious quality
about it that had long since caused Clare to suspect a secret, and she
had guessed instinctively that Renny would one day let her into it.
'You asked me the other day if I was in love with Gordon.' Renny
moved with slow steps to take possession of the vacant armchair
opposite her friend.
'I shouldn't have. It's obvious, has been for a few weeks now.'
'I've an idea he's going to ask me to marry him.'
Clare's expression became puzzled.
'In that case, what's your problem? He loves you and you love him.
Adds up to wedding-bells, surely?'
Renny looked into her friend's eyes, eyes that were big arid blue and
honest.
'You ask what my problem is.' She paused as if having difficulty in
framing her next words. 'I'm already married,' she owned, the words
coming easily and simply in the end.
'Married!' ejaculated Clare, and several seconds elapsed before,
recovering from her stupefaction, she was able to add, 'Is this true? If
so, why haven't you mentioned it before?'
'I've never told a soul about it --' She broke off, spreading her hands. 'I
was eighteen at the time and the man I married was twenty-three.'
'You've been married for eight years?' Clare looked disbelievingly at
her. 'Tell me some more.'
'We were both distracted, quite out of our minds and therefore totally
unfit to make a decision. But we did make oneas hastily as that!'
Renny snapped her fingers, a frown lingering in her eyes. 'It seems
incredible when I look back on it now.'
'It was obviously a failure. How long did you live together?'
'About six hours --'
'What!' For fully half a minute Clare could only blink at her. 'Six
hours?'
'You see, we'd known each other for less than four days when we got
married.'
Clare gaped, completely tongue-tied this time. It was an age before
she said,
'Renny, girl, you stagger me. Are you sure you're not pulling my leg?
I mean, you're so level-headedmust be to hold on to the job of
private and confidential secretary to the chief consultant to one of
England's largest engineering firms.'
'I'm level-headed now, but then ...' Renny's eyes become reflective. 'I
wasn't at that time, Clare. You see, my fiance had been killed in an air
crashNo, he hadn't been killed, but I thought he had.' She stopped
as she noticed the expression in her friend's eyes. 'I expect it sounds
like a lot of nonsense to you?'
'It certainly doesn't make much sense, my pet. You say your fiance
was killed, and then he wasn't. I feel like asking twenty questions!
Am I to take it that the man you married was not this fiance you
mention?''That's right. I married someone else altogether.'
Clare drew a breath.
'You're having difficulty in relating this story, even though you want
to relate it. Well, Renny, just you begin at the beginning and I'm sure
it won't be nearly so difficult. I'll help you with part of it. You've
already told me your parents were killed when their little pleasure
craft capsized and they were carried out to sea. You weren't in the
boat, as you'd gone to stay with a schoolfriend somewhere in Wales.
Your parents' solicitor befriended you, finding you a home and a job,
correct?'
'Yes, that's correct.' Renny had listened attentively and now she sat
back, relaxing against the soft velvet upholstery of the chair, grateful
that Clare had managed to make things easier for her.
'You decided to attend a secretarial school in the evenings and
eventually landed the marvellous job with Gordon Elmsley.' Clare
looked steadily at her. 'But what you want to talk about takes place
before you went to work for Gordon.'
'I was nearly eighteen when I got engaged to Paul Houseman,' said
Renny, taking up the story and speaking quite calmly about the
momentous events which had taken place at that time. 'He was a
steward on an aircraft, and although I didn't really care for his job I
did feel happy and secure once we'd decided to marry. I could see a
nice little home of our own, and a contented life ahead. It was awful
when I had no one of my own, as you can imagine,' she added,
digressing for a moment as the memory of her desolation swept over
her. -- --
'Indeed yes. I'm lucky, having parents and two sisters.'
'Paul and I were saving every penny, as we both wanted to get
married as soon as possible.' Renny paused musingly. In the grate a
log slipped and a flame shot up from out of the glowing sparks; it
high-, lighted her honey-brown hair, long straight hair that fell like a
cloak about her shoulders. Clare saw her lips move, the manifestation
of a memory and, too fascinated to break her reverie, she just sat and
watched in sympathetic silence, waiting for the mood of retrospection
to pass. When presently it did pass Renny continued, in that soft and
sweetly-modulated voice which was one of her greatest attractions, 'I
was listening to the radio one evening when, on the news, I learned
that a plane had crashed somewhere in the desert. Everyone on board
was killed.'
'Your fiance was on board that plane?'
Renny nodded, marvelling at her lack of emotion. Nevertheless, she
did manage to convey-to her friend just how she felt at the time.
'I was shattered, and didn't want to live. The names were given later
and Paul's was one, so it seemed there could be no mistake. My fiance
was dead.'
'What a terrible time you must have had --' Clare, deeply affected, had
to stop because of the ache of compassion that caught her throat. 'To
have lost your parents only two years previously, and now your
fiance. No wonder you were shattered.' Clare paused, but Renny said
nothing and she went on, 'You were married at eighteen, you said, to
this other man --?'
'It'll all be plain in a moment,' interrupted Renny who, having got this
far, was anxious to come to the end of her story. 'If you can imagine
how I was, distraught, with no hope for the future, no one of my own
to turn to for comfort. I went out, into the teeming rain and mist of a
London night and wandered from one street to another, scarcely
knowing what I did. I remember being soaked to the skin, and the
traffic splashing mud on to my legs and clothes. The physical
discomfort seemed, absurdly, to help me bear my mental agony.'
Clare nodded but made no comment. 'I don't even remember stepping
into the road, right in front of an oncoming lorry. A man, acting with
incredible speedy and realising that to try to drag me back would only
result in the loss of a vital second, ran into my back and pushed me
forward, falling on top of me as the lorry sped by, missing us both
quite literally by inches. Apart from a few cuts and bruises neither of
us suffered any injury, because there was nothing coming in the other
direction. It was a miracle.'
Renny stopped, gripped in a vice of emotion which showed in the tiny
beads of perspiration standing out on her clear wide forehead.
Tendrils of hair had become dampened and she lifted a hand to push
them away. 'This man picked me up and carried me to a cafe, where
he bought me a cup of tea. I couldn't drink it --' She broke off, and it
was Clare who supplied the words,
'Because you just sat there and vomited.'
A convulsive shudder rippled along Renny's spine.
'The man called a taxi, put me into it, then asked where I lived. I
believe I became hysterical, declaring quite emphatically that I had
no home, no peopleno one at all. I said I wanted to die and this, of
course, fitted in with the impression I had given the man that I had
attempted suicide. He took me to his flat. Clare, it was the most
luxurious place you ever saw! Even in my numbed and anguished
state of mind I could appreciate the lovely decor and expensive
furnishings.' Renny paused, glancing at her friend. 'It's proving to be a
long story,' she added apologetically.
'And., a most interesting one. Please go on, Renny. I'm a little ahead
of you, of course. You married this man who had saved your life.'
"Yes, you were bound to guess, after what I've already told you. It so
happened that he too had suffered, as his fiancee had jilted him almost
at the altar. That very afternoon she'd told him she was in love with
someone else and was breaking off the engagement. I
imaginealthough he never said sothat he pleaded with her to
reconsider. There was no doubt at all that he was madly in love with
her.'
Clare had become thoughtful, working out in her mind exactly what
had happenedhow fate had played such a strong hand in
precipitating two desolate people into a hasty andas it turned
outdisastrous marriage.
'It's obvious that, when you met, you were both passing through the
darkest period in your lives.'
'Very true. With me--well, I had had one dark period, when I lost my
parents. But, as you say, this was a very dark period, a hopeless
period when, for my part, death would have been welcome.' Renny
moved in her chair, away from the heat of the fire. 'You can see what
I meant when I said that neither of us was fit to make a decision.'
'You were only eighteen, and he was twenty-three. He was too young
for marriage, anyway. Thirty's early enough for a man to marry.'
'L agree) although Paul was only twenty-five.' Renny thought of her
husband, who would be thirty-one now. Had he found someone to
love? If so, he obviously had no wish to marry her; there was proof of
this in the fact that he had never divorced his wife.
"When this man found you --' Clare broke off, to ask the name of the
man Renny had married.
'Carl Langley.'
"You've never used the name, I take it?' Without waiting for the
obvious answer Clare went on to ask if, when Carl found her, he too
had been wandering the rain-washed streets of London, scarcely
knowing what he was doing.
'Yes, I discovered that the following day, when we talked together.'
Renny went on to relate how Carl had been infinitely kind to her,
making her take a bath so that she would not catch a chill. She had
been provided with a pair of his pyjamas and a cosy dressing- gown,
both much too big for her but welcome after the wet clothes she had
been wearing. He gave her supper, sternly forcing her to eat it. Then
came a drink, and some tablets to make her sleep.
'You weren't afraid?' said Clare with a curious glance at her across the
space that separated them.
Renny shook her head.
'For one thing, I hadn't the strength to protest, and for another I knew
instinctively that I could trust him, this even though, at that time, I
had no idea that he had just lost his fiancee.'
'I rather think,' mused Clare, 'that he probably welcomed the
diversionoh, I don't mean that he was glad you'd suffered so
dreadfully, but that as you were precipitated into his life at this crucial
time, he had something to take his mind off his own misery.'
'The same idea crossed my mind,' nodded Renny, - 'and I'm very sure
now that this was the case. He was so kind, Clare, you have no idea
what he did for me at a time when I felt so utterly alone and unhappy.
We talked the following morning. I learned that he was in business,
his father having died the previous year and left., him several hotels
in the Far East. Two were in Singapore and one in Bangkok. He was
terribly bitter about his mother, who had remarried within three
months of his father's death. When Carl took her to task over this she
admitted that she had been having an affair with the man for several
years.'
Clare's eyes opened very wide. -
'Lord, this, and the jilting, ought to have given him the strongest
aversion to women!'
Renny bit her lip, a tinge of guilty colour fusing her cheeks. Not only
those two, she reflected, but herself too, deserting him within hours of
the marriage. It would not be at all surprising if he were a woman-
hatera circumstance that would acpount for his not attempting to
gain his freedom.
'He believed I'd intended to commit suicide,' she went on hurriedly. 'I
tr^ed to convince him otherwise, but failed, and as it wasn't important
I let him think what he liked/
'He'd probably felt like ending his own life.'
'No, he was too strong a character for that, Clare. I knew that although
he was kindness itself, keeping me at his flat and tending me with the
care of a woman, he could be very stern and masterful. If he told me
to do something I never once thought of disobeying him, as I knew it
would be futile.' --'
'Even at twenty-three he was masterful? I wonder what he's like now
at...' Clare calculated a moment. 'At thirty-one. A very attractive age
for a man, Renny. What was he like? Good-looking?'
'Extraordinarily so. And tallwell over six feet. He had an air of
nobility about him which, added enormously to his innate confidence.
I felt small and insignificant beside him, but very safe as well.'
Clare glanced at her with a curious expression. But she made no
comment. She was impatient for the rest of the story and urged Renny
to continue.
'We seem to have digressed a little,' was all she said', and then fell
silent.
'There isn't much more to tell. Carl pointed out that we had both lost
everything we'd lived for, that we were now two lonely people whom
fate had thrown together in the most improbable circumstances. He
said that our only immediate prospect was one of deep unhappiness,
but that if we married we might be able to comfort one another.'
Renny's expression became thoughtful. 'Looking back now I believe
his chief concern was for me. He was strong and although he was
devastated at the time, his personality was such that he would never
go under. He would surmount the heartbreak eventually. But he
wasn't so sure about me. He was aware that I had no one of my own,
that I was in no fit condition to resume my employment. I remember
him saying that while marriage to him couldn't in any way be
regarded as a panacea for my grief, it would at least put a stop to my
wandering about in a demented condition, and stepping in front of
lorries. Well, with this man coming into my life at such a vital time,
offering me not only physical comfort and protection, but sympathy
and kindness as well, I had no hesitation in saying I would marry
him.'
'He sounds very nice, Renny. And you obviously didn't find him
repulsive in any way --'
'Indeed no I' broke in Renny swiftly. 'On the contrary, I found him
attractiveperhaps because of his kindness and understanding. I
know I could have could have...' She tailed off, not knowing how to
finish what she had wanted to say. As before, Clare supplied the
words for her.
'You could have been his wife in the true sense? You'd no visions of
just a marriage of convenience?'
'No, I hadn't. I don't believe Carl would have agreed to that kind of
marriage. It was to have been normal.'
Clare nodded, becoming thoughtful for a space.
'I believe I know the rest,' she told Renny, 'but tell me just the same.'
'It was all over in four days. Carl said a strange thing as we came out
of the Registrar's office and got into his car. He said, "Renny, my
dear, one day you and I might be able to laugh together ... and after
that, who knows?"'
Clare eyed her perceptively.
'It would appear that he hadn't dismissed the possibility of your
falling in love with one another, later, when you'd both got over your
broken hearts?'
'I believe you're right, Clare.' Renny was frowning heavily as she
spoke. She was far from happy at the idea just voiced by her friend.
She wanted her to be wrong, for then she would not feel quite so
blameworthy for the way she had treated the man who became her
husband. 'I said we lived together for six hours,' she continued
presently. 'Carl insisted on our having dinner out, and he drove into
the country to a very expensive hotel. We reached there about seven
o'clock, having been married at three that afternoon and gone back to
his flat for an hour or so. We had dinner --'
Renny broke off, her mouth quivering, and Clare, with the picture in
her mind of a girl who was little more than a child, dining on her
wedding-day with a man who had taken her dead fiance's place, had
no difficulty in guessing at the depth of emotion which, for a while,
prevented speech. 'When it was time to go home I went: into the
cloakroom for my wrap. The woman attendant had her radio on,
listening to details of the crash.' Another slight pause and Clare
waited, her own nerves actually tensed, , for the most dramatic words
of this incredible story to be voiced. 'The announcer was saying that a
mistake had been discovered; it was known that at least three
passengers and two of the crew had survived and that a rescue squad
was on its way to them. Paul's name was given out as one of the
survivors. Itit had come through on the radio of the aircraft, which
at first had been out of order, and that was the reason for the
assumption that everyone on board hadhad died.'
Silence and fireglow pervaded the cosy living-room, but outside the
wind could be heard; it had risen a little, causing the slender branch of
a tree to whisper against the window-pane. Both girls listened, Renny
with her thoughts in the distant past, wondering where her husband
was at this moment. She stared into the fire and wished that all her
problems were solved.
'Looking back now I know I ought to have gone immediately to Carl
and explained how I felt. He would have understood, I'm sure of it.' A
shadow of regret darkened Renny's lovely eyes. 'For some reason I
panicked, remembering only Carl's sternness and mastery, and
imagining he would be furiously angry and force me to stay with him.
This was only one part of me, though. The other part rejoiced that
Paul was safe. Nothing seemed to matter except that I get to him,
without delay.' Renny's expression was pained suddenly. 'There's no
doubt at all that my mind was affected at that time, because every one
of my actions was irrationaltotally and inexcusably irrational!'
'Don't blame yourself so much,' chided Clare. 'You were only a kid,
and alone in the world. You couldn't be expected to tackle problems
with the maturity of an older woman, and one whose background was
secure.'
'All the same, I should have known better than to run out on my
husband, leaving nothing more than a hastily-written notewhich
was probably curt as well saying I was going away as I'd learned
that my fiance was alive.'
'You went from the hotel into your fiance's loving arms? No, he
hadn't been rescued yet, you said?'
'No.' Renny gave a deep sigh and lapsed into silence.
'What happened? You never divorced Carl to marry Paul, which was
to be expected.'
Bitterness held Renny silent, for a space.
'I'll not bore you with the miserable details, Clare,' she said at last. 'It's
sufficient to say that Paul went wild, with fury at the idea of my being
married. I tried to explain that I was overwhelmed by grief and didn't
know what Iwas doing. His reaction was harshly condemning. He
scourged me for marrying someone else when I believed he'd just
been killed, said he'd had a narrow escape as I was shallow. He
showed me the door--' Renny broke off, her whole body jerking
with the convulsive shudder that passed through her as stark
recollection thrust itself into her consciousness and she re-lived her
anguish. 'I loved Paul dearly, and it was terrible to bear.'
Anger brought two bright spots of colour to Clare's cheeks.
'It-must have been, but you've since admitted that it was you who"had
a narrow escape, not this Paul?'
'Yes, I certainly had a narrow escape. When I compare Carl's
kindness, his gentle concern for me, and his understanding, with the
behaviour of the man I loved, it's amazing that I didn't run back to my
husband at once.'
"What did you do?'
'I grieved and fretted in my little apartment and tried to think things
out. I still loved Paul and I believe that if he had come to me I'd have
taken him back even though, deep down, I was already admitting that
he and I would never have made a go of marriage. He had no
understanding, no sympathy with my agony of mind, whereas Carl
was just the opposite. And I suppose it was the convictionthat Carl
would understand, and forgive methat sent me back in the end.'
'You did go back, then?'
Renny nodded.
'I was already thinking in a more rational way, because of course I
was no longer grieving for a fiance who was dead. Also, I was
gradually coming to accept that I'd not lost anything by the break with
Paul.'
'In other words, you were realising that you'd thrown away the gold
for the dross.'
'Something of the kind, although you must remember that my
husband was still a stranger to me. However, his words kept running
through my mindthat we might one day be able to laugh together. I
had a wonderful feeling of optimism, I remember. I'd be able to help
him and he'd help me. I'd do all in my power to mend his broken
heart, to make him forget. the girl who had so callously let him down.
Do you know, Clare, that I was actually excited when I'd eventually
made up my mind to return to him. I felt we could make a success of
our marriage in spite of the way we'd rushed into it. I'd given myself a
full week to think things out. When I went back to his flat I found it
closed up; and the tenant of an adjoining flat informed me th&t the
owner had gone abroad and his flat was up for sale.'
'He'd gone off to lick his two wounds?'
'I expect so,' answered Renny sadly. 'I felt awful, Clare. No one could
have felt more ashamed than I did. And I felt lost, too, terribly alone
in the world. But I had no one to blame but myself, making one major
bluMer after another like that. Why, for instance, didn't I return to
Carl immediately instead of letting a week go by?'
'You're altogether too self-critical, Renny. As I just pointed out, you
were a mere child at that time. You'd never think of acting like that
now simply because you're older, and more mature in consequence.'
Clare spoke her mind as she added, 'The only real mistake you made
was in falling in love with a man who was unworthy of you. He must
have revealed his true self at some time or other in your relationship?'
Renny nodded in agreement.
'I remember that he used often" to find fault with me, and to grumble.
It hurt a lot; I remember that too.'
Clare veered the subject, asking Renny what she meant to do now.
'You want to marry Gordon, so you'll have to divorce Carl. Do you
know how you're going to find him?'
'I remember him saying that if he hadn't met me he'd have gone to live
in Singaporeafter he'd been jilted, that was.'
'He sounds as if he's rich. You could have been living the good life all
these years.'
Renny nodded, digesting this as she recalled yet again Carl's words
about their being able to laugh together.
'I wonder what he's doing...' She spoke to herself, feeling a strange
little access of sadness that she had a husband and yet had no idea
where he was or what he was doing.
'You'll have to contact him, but that'll be difficult and it'll take time.
Will Gordon wait?'
'I feel he'll be patient. I've shirked telling him I'm married and can
only hope he'll understand.'
'I feel he will; he's that sort of person.'
And it transpired that Clare's prophecy was to prove correct. After the
initial shock of discovering that his beloved was already married,
Gordon listened sympathetically to her story and when at length she
stopped speaking he took her in his arms and kissed her tenderly.
'Between us, love, we'll have it sorted out.' He paused in thought.
'Singapore ... I wonder...?'
'Wonder what?' enquired Renny after waiting some moments for
Gordon to continue.
'I was offered a transfer to Singapore --'
'You were? You didn't say anything to me.'
'No, I turned it down because I took it for granted that you wouldn't
want to go there, since you'd always told me how much you love the
English countryside. I knew I was intending to ask you to marry me
so, as I said, I turned it down.'
Renny looked at him.
'You could still have the job?'
'I'm fairly sure I could. I don't think it's even been advertised yet.'
'I'd go with you as your secretary?' she asked unnecessarily.
'Of course. You don't suppose I'd go without you, do you?'
She smiled up at him, feeling foolish for putting the question. She
was Gordon's secretary and therefore she must accompany him,
wherever his assignments took him.
'I feel it would be a very good idea to accept the transfer,' she said. 'If
Carl is in Singapore then I could surely find him.'
'You haven't any real need to meet him, you know. One can get a
divorce very easily these days.'
'I realise that but, somehow, I feel I owe it to him to see "Him and
explain my conduct. Please don't ask me for a reason; I can't give
myself one. All I know is that, after the shabby way I treated him, I
ought to say I'm sorry.'
'You're a brave girl,' remarked Gordon wryly. 'From your description
of the man he sounds rather formidable to me,'
'He'll have got over any anger he felt towards me/ was Renny's
confident response.
Gordon made no comment. They were in the lounge of the Fox and
Barrel, having drinks before going into the restaurant for dinner.
Renny looked at him across the table, some impulse directing her to
compare him with Carl. Of course, Carl might have changed
considerably in eight years. He certainly must have changed a little,
since time inevitably did, change people. He had dark brown hair, she
remembered, and it waved slightly at the front. His eyes were tawny
in colour and, she suspected, they could have reflected something far
removed from the gentleness she invariably saw in them when he was
so assiduously ministering to her needs. She had seen them stern but
never harsh, she recalled. Gordon's eyes were blue, light blue, going
well with the colour of his skin and his fair hair. He was big in a more
rounded way than Carl, whose tall frame was lean and athletic, and
who carried it with an air of distinction not untinged with
arroganceespecially in the way he held his head, and with those
broad shoulders so erect. His features, too, were lean, and bronzed as
if he spent a good deal of his time out of doors. His hands were long
and sensitive, she reflected, and they had been so very gentle when
drying her tears of grief. Carl was taller than Gordon, and his
confidence even then, at twenty-three, seemed more pronounced than
Gordon's, despite the fact that Gordon had the sort of job which called
for confidence, being, at twenty-nine, the youngest chief consultant
the firm had ever employed.
'I'll see about that transfer,' Gordon was promising later, when he and
Renny were saying goodnight at her door. It was Saturday and he had
come over from Manchester, where he had a service flat, to spend the
week-end in Buxton, staying at an hotel because Renny could not
accommodate him at the flat. She had the room but not the furniture.
Gordon's coming up each week-end was routine ever since he and
Renny had been going out together, and every Monday morning they
would drive together to their place of work outside Manchester. 'I
hope I haven't lost it,' added Gordon a trifle anxiously. 'I feel we shall
both thoroughly enjoy a spell in the Far East.' He stopped to kiss her,
and whisper something that was totally irrelevant to what he had just
been saying. 'If you do find this husband of yours, and a divorce can
be arranged amicably, then it won't take long at all.'
'I hope it won't,' responded Renny seriously. 'How long can we stay in
Singapore?'
'About a year.'
'A year? That's a fair time. I ought to be able to find Carl long before
it's time for us to leavethat is, of course, if he is living there. I've no
proof, remember.'
'It seems very likely, though, that he's there, with owning these hotels
you mention.'
'Yes, I agree.' Renny paused in thought for a moment. 'I expect he'll
be willing to have the amicable divorce you mention,' she added
confidently.
Gordon looked at her.
'You speak so calmly of Carl,' he remarked. 'But I suppose he's
become a nebulous figure to you after all these years?'
'Strangely he isn't nebulous at allat least, not now. All through the
years I've scarcely ever thought of him, there was no need to, as I
didn't want a divorce. But now that I've begun to think about him his
face is unbelievably clear. His manner, too, and his kindness --'
Renny looked at Gordon with a hint of apology in her eyes. 'You do
understand, don't you, Gordon?'
'Of course, my darling. What sort of man would I be if I didn't? Carl
was marvellous to you-at that time. After all, he could have
disappeared immediately after' the rescue. Instead, he must have
guessed you needed help, and he concerned himself with your
welfare. It's incredible, when you think about it in some depth. Most
men wouldn't have bothered.'
'He saw my condition; I was soaking wet, right through to the skin. I
was crying, and almost hysterical. Yes,' she mused, 'he was so very
good to melike an angel appearing just when I needed one.' Renny
gave a small sigh. It was strange how she felt, how she wanted to see
Carl again, to talk to him and let him know that she was grateful, and
would be for the rest of her life.
'It's a wonder he's never wanted to marry,' Gordon said. 'A man like
that is wasted if he remains a bachelor.'
Renny smiled. A bachelor? Carl was neither husband nor bachelor,
just as she was neither wife nor spinster.
'Clare is of the opinion that he's a woman-hater. You see, it wasn't
only that he was jilted, and then deserted by his bride, but his mother
hurt him as well; she married within three months of his father's
death- married the man she'd been having an affair with for several
years.'
'Good lord! He's certainly suffered at the hands of women I I'm
inclined to agree with* Clare that he's a woman-hater.'
'It would account for his not asking me for a divorce.'
'Yes, it would.'
'I wish he'd found someone nice,' murmured Renny on a sad little
note. 'No one deserves happiness more than he does.'
"He's still young. He'll find happiness one day.'Gordon, considering
enough time had been spent on talking about Renny's husband, took
her in his arms, and for the next few minutes no words were spoken
between them. But at last they were saying the final goodnight, and
Renny stood on the step, waving in the darkness, as Gordon slid into
his car and drove away.
On the following Tuesday he was able to inform her that the job was
his and that they would be flying to Singapore immediately after
Christmas.
'We'll be there for the Chinese New Year,' he added. 'It's at the end of
January, and this year is the Year Of the Dragon, so I'm told.' He
stopped and laughed at Renny's expression. 'Don't ask me to explain;
I don't know anything much about it at all. Apparently their New
Year is linked to the Chinese zodiac and every twelve years it comes
round to the dragon, which is the zodiac's most auspicious animal,,
standing, in that part of the world, for all that's good. So we're most
fortunate in having an opportunity to join in the celebrations this
particular year.'
'It sounds fascinating. I'm really looking forward to it. It'll certainly
be a change from anything we've ever experienced before.'
'We're lucky...' They were in the office and so he did not attempt to
kiss her, but his glance was tenderness itself and so was his voice as
he added, 'Christmas to look forward to first, and then this trip to
Singapore, and after that ... marriage. Does it make you happy, my
darling?'
'Just about as happy as it's possible to be, Gordon.'
'I wish you'd have let me buy you the ring. I want you to be wearing
it...' He shrugged resignedly even before she said,
'I'd rather wait until I'm free, Gordonplease try to - understand. It
seems wrong, somehow, to be wearing your ring when I'm married to
someone else.'
'You have high ideals, and I love you for it. But we are engaged,' he
added with a hint of mastery.
'Of course we are,' returned Renny happily. 'And this time next year
we might be married.'
'In which case we shall be spending our honeymoon in some romantic
place in that part of the world. How would you like to go to the island
of Bali ?'
Her eyes shone.
'I've read about Bali; it's supposed to be the world's most beautiful
island.'
'A fitting place for a honeymoon, my love. If the divorce goes through
in time that's where I shall take you.'

CHAPTER TWO
AFTER a smooth descent over Singapore's harbour and city, the
Boeing 707 made an equally smooth touchdown on the runway of the
island's Paya Lebar Airport. It was half-past seven in the evening, and
Renny and Gordon were charmed by the myriad coloured lights
which spangled the busy waterfront. In the harbour were ocean liners,
freighters, sampans and numerous other vessels. Kelongs with their
powerful storm lanterns added to the mixture of light and shade, their
jumble of wooden poles topped by small shacks, rupturing the sea's
horizon and yet giving it a sort of mystic aspect which was always so
much a part of the Orient. Kelong owners were a very special breed of
men, hardy men whose lives were spent in fishing at night under the
glow of their lanterns whose bright lights attracted schools of
anchovies and cuttlefish, and also their predators, tuna fish and
mackerel. The men rarely if ever married, preferring to spend their
entire lives in the spartan existence which began and ended with the
spiky-looking contraption of architecture known as the kelong.
'Oh, but this is exciting!' Renny exclaimed, thinking of the
narrowness of her travel ventures up till nowCornwall for her
annual holiday each year, and a week-end in London now and then.
'Gordon, aren't you excited too?'
He was, he admitted, but his reaction was less spontaneous than
Renny's.
They had been booked in at the Mandarin Hotel, but heir stay would
be only temporary as the firm was hoping to find them a private
apartment or villa.
'I've never seen anything like it!' gasped Renny even before she
entered the incredible Mandarin Square, the vast lobby of the hotel.
'It's ... breathtaking!' She just stood, absorbing the contrast of a
magnificent white marble floor with the black Italian marble walls
and seats of vibrant scarlet. 'Just look at that mural!' Renny pointed,
indicating a beautiful work of arteighty-seven larger-than-life
fairies delineated by gold etched into gleaming white marble. 'I never
expected the firm to send us to an hotel like this.' Renny stared and
stared, then lifted her eyes to the canopies .decorated with an
abundance of gold leaf, exquisitely worked. And cascading down
from the ceiling was a massive waterfall made of Venetian glass.
'If this is the lobby,' said Gordon, 'then what's the rest of the hotel
like?'
They were soon to discover that the bedrooms reflected the same
luxurious good taste as the Mandarin Square.
Renny, left by the porter who had taken her baggage to a palatial
room whose decor left her breathless for the second time, wondered if
this was some enchanting but impossible dream from which she
would soon awaken.
'It must be the most beautiful and extravagant hotel in the world...'
Her awed gaze rested on the bed, with its spread of soft pastel
primrose matching the drapes at the huge floor-to-ceiling window.
There was a television set and radio, an elegant sofa in gold-coloured
velvet with matching down cushions. The bathroom, with its
flowery-patterned tiles in primrose and brown, had twin basins, bath,
shower and even an extension telephone. Soap was in pretty boxes, a
sachet of expensive bath gelee was on the end of the enormous bath.
Renny gave a deep contented sigh and began to unpack. She and
Gordon were dining at nine o'clock in the Top of the M, the
Mandarin's revolving restaurant on the fortieth floor. For this
occasion Renny chose to wear a long full dress of white lace with an
underslip of apple green nylon'. Her hair shone and so did her eyes.
She was happy and it showed. As Gordon had remarked when they
entered the hotel lobby, this was a most romantic start to their
engagement.
'It's a shame we're not on our honeymoon,' he was> saying as they sat
at a secluded table in an atmosphere of soft lights and quiet music,
enjoying the last of their wine while waiting for the sweet course to
be served. The meal had been a delight to Renny, who ventured to try
the Shark's Fin soup and then another exotic delicacy, Peking Duck.
The view was also a delight, as from the high wide window there
could be viewed a spectacular panorama of Singapore and the
countries of Malaysia and Indonesia. Sea, jungle and the star- filled
sky...
'It's a three hundred and sixty degree view of South- East Asia
without moving from your seat,' observed Renny, enthralled by the
restaurant and the food and the impeccable service. But she was
affected in a different way altogether. Her senses seemed to respond
indefinably J the vibrant atmosphere of the Orient; she was aware of
emotions that were exciting in some deeply mystic way that left her
with the firm conviction that life would never be quite the same when,
at the end of the year's term here, she and Gordon returned to the cold
reality of the Western world. He was speaking, suggesting they go
along to one of the cocktail lounges, but she declined, saying she
would prefer to go to bed. They had eaten their sweetGordon
having fresh fruit but Renny once again being venturesome and
choosing Bo-buh Cha. Cha-more for its intriguing name than
anything else. It turned out to be an ice dessert flavoured with cubes
of jelliton and yams. She found it delightfully refreshing and kept it in
mind for a repetition some time.
'It was such a long flight,' she said apologetically when Gordon had
tried again to persuade her to join him at one of the bars. 'I slept, I
know, but fitfully. I'm looking forward to a good night's rest.'
'Well, we haven't to start work for another three days, so you can lie
in in the morning if you wish.'
'No, I don't think I'll do that, Gordon. I'd rather use these three days
we have to try and find Carl.'
'I think I agree. The sooner you find him the better.' He paused,
looking at her with affection. 'As I've already said, there isn't any real
necessity for you to meet him, you know.'
'Please bear with me,' begged Renny seriously. 'I want to meet him,
and to thank him for all he did for me. It's late, I know, but I haven't
had an opportunity before of meeting him. If I do find him I must tell
him of my deep gratitude, and how ashamed I am for running out on
him. I also want' Her voice trailed to silence. For some reason she
could not confide to her fianc that she wanted to see how her
husband was faring, to see if he was happy.
'Yes?' Gordon looked enquiringly at her, but she shook her head.
'It was nothing. And now, if you'll excuse me, I'll go to bed/ They had
both risen as she spoke; Gordon decided to go along to the Clipper
Bar for a last drink, but he escorted Renny to her room first, going
inside with her and kissing her goodnight.
The following morning they met at the breakfast table. Gordon had
already received a message and he told Renny that he had to go into
the office later that morning.
'I'm sorry, darling, to leave you on your own, but I have to obey the
summons.'
'Don't worry about it, Gordon. I'm not a babe in arms, you know.'
'I shall probably be away for the greater part of the day.' His
good-humoured face was a trifle anxious despite Renny's attempt to
reassure him. 'It's a strange place, with strange people. I don't like the
idea of your wandering about, all by yourself.'
She had to laugh at his fears.
'I shan't get lost, if that's what's troubling you. I've at tongue in my
head, and everyone speaks English.'
'Very well, if you're happy about it,' he said accommodatingly. 'I don't
yet know for sure, but I've an idea I'll be wanted tomorrow as well as
today, and probably Friday too.'
'Won't you need me? I am your secretary, after all.'
Gordon shook his head.
'I shan't need you, Renny. I'm only looking around, really. It seems
they want me to familiarise myself with the whole place.' He paused,
looking questioningly at her. 'You haven't told me how you propose
to begin your search?'
'I thought of making enquiries at police headquarters. If Carl's well
known then I might just get a clue from the police.'
'It seems reasonable,' agreed Gordon. 'If, as you believe, he has
interests in hotels here then it's feasible that he's well known.'
To Renny's surprise it was an Englishman whom she saw when, after
entering the building, she asked ipr the police officer in charge. To
her further surprise she was immediately informed that Mr Carl
Langley owned the Zephyr Hotel in Orchard Road, where he resided
in a penthouse.
Orchard Road ... The same road in which the Mandarin was situated.
Renny came out of the building only fifteen minutes after entering it,
dazed by the ease with which she had been able to locate her husband.
She walked on, into a throng which included Chinese, Malays,
Indians, Europeans and many other nationalities. Trishaws slowed up
alongside her, but she smilingly declined the services offered to her.
Taxi drivers slowed their cabs too, hoping for a fare. Renny walked
on, through a kaleidoscope of colour, through a medley of voices and
laughter, her entire thoughts with the man whom she had married in
such haste and then deserted. The forthcoming encounter was no
longer viewed, objectively and without emotion. On the contrary, she
knew fear, uncertainty and trepidation and these combined to erase
the complacency with which she had hitherto regarded the meeting
with Carl.
She was asking herself how he would receive her. He might be
amused at her whim, or he might on the Other hand treat her with the
contempt she deserved. He could be angry with her, remembering the
hurt and humiliation she had caused him when, after he had done so
much for her, she had repaid him in such a callous manner. Renny bit
her lip, vexed with herself for what she could only term cowardice.
For without doubt she was not looking forward to the meeting with
Carlin fact, she almost felt like shirking it, and getting in touch
with him by post. But immediately this struck her as absurd, if only
because Carl was living so close to where she was at present staying.
She made her way along Orchard Road to the Zephyr, and stood
outside looking up at its many rising storeys. A truly magnificent
hotel that must surely rival the Mandarin in elegance and good taste.
Twice she entered the lobby, then went out into the road again. A few
moments more of uncertainty and she was hurrying back to her own
hotel.
'You discovered his whereabouts as easily as that! 'was Gordon's
amazed exclamation when he learned of Renny's success. 'How
incredible!'
'I intended to go and see if he was in,' she said.
'Why didn't you?'
She looked at him and wondered how he could be so calm about it all.
And yet why shouldn't he be? she was asking herself a moment later.
Carl was nothing, either in Gordon's life or in hers.
'I suppose,' she admitted at length, 'that I got cold feet.'
'Cold feet?' Gordon raised his eyebrows. 'Surely not. After all these
years it'll only be like meeting a total stranger.'
Stranger ... and yet her husband...
'I can't explain,' she sighed. 'I feel apprehensive at the idea of coming
face to face with himI know it sounds crazy to you, but there it is.'
Gordon shrugged and Renny changed the subject,, aware that he was
becoming impatient with her.
The next day she wandered through the streets of the city, admiring
the decorations which were being put up in readiness for the New
Year celebrations. Brilliantly coloured dragons seemed to be
everywhere high up on the facades of buildings, on the ground in
front of hotels, or in gardens fringing the roads. Everyone seemed
infected, commenting and laughing and stopping to watch the men at
work on ladders putting up the bunting.
Renny wished she had nothing on her mind, so that she too could be
enjoying the excitement. The Zephyr loomed before her suddenly and
she swung round to proceed in the other direction. But she stopped
abruptly.
'It's got to be done,' she told herself resolutely and; propelling herself
with a sort of mechanical determination, she entered the hotel before
she could change her mind even yet again. But it then took sheer
strength of purpose to carry her to the reception desk and ask to see
Mr Carl Langley.
'Mr Langley is not in at present.' The Chinese clerk, speaking perfect
English but with a high-pitched intonation, asked politely if she
would like to leave a message.
She sighed and shook her head. After all her efforts Carl was not in.
'No-r-eryes, I will leave a message...' She stopped slowly, watching
the man's expression. He was staring beyond her, towards the
entrance, and Renny turned her head.
'He is here now, madam.' The voice of the clerk seemed to drift to her
over a distance; the face of the man coming towards her was blurred,
as was that of the glamorous slant-eyed beauty at his side. Renny felt
her legs go weak, her heart begin to race madly against her ribs. A
choking sensation swelled up in her throat, preventing speech. The
man stopped, his tawny eyes bright, and piercing. A movement at the
side of his jawlike that of a nerve out of controlwas the only
visible sign of emotion. Renny stared, taking in the changes in his
featuresthe taut jawline and harsh contours of his lean bronzed
cheeks. His mouth was thinner than she remembered, his chin more
out- thrust. And sprinkled among the brown hair were a few threads
of grey here and there.
This man was her husband ... Sounds reached her cascading chatter
and laughter from Singaporeans sauntering past the hotel entrance;
the voice of the Chinese porter speaking to a couple of American
tourists who were asking about a room, a vehicle backfiring and a
screech of brakes ... Other things registered: the girl with the almond
eyes, her arm tucked possessively into Carl's, the man himself, slowly
coming towards her, a tall assured man of the world whose
formidable appearance made Renny want to turn and run, but instead
she passed a tongue over her dry lips and tried to say something. But
it was Carl who broke the silenceand the spell.
'It's ... Renny.' He added something softly to himself. Renny saw the
movement of his lips and knew he said, 'My wife.'
Never was a moment so tensed, so charged with emotion. The girl,
obviously puzzled, looked from Carl to Renny and back again.
'But will you not introduce me, Carl?' The voice, husky and low, was
attractively seductive, as was the girl's whole appearance, from her
blue-black hair and Asian features to her incredibly slender figure
and perfectly-shaped legs. She wore a suit of emerald green linen
with a blouse beneath which had a mandarin collar which went so
well with her general appearance.
Carl came forward, the girl at his side. Renny heard the name, Masie,
and automatically extended a hand to her as she said,
'How do you do...?' then stopped. She. had not heard the girl's
surname.
'I came to look for you,' Renny managed at last, looking up at Carl
and gathering a modicum of composure which she hoped she could
retain. 'Is there somewhere where we can talk?'
He looked her up and down; she felt stripped before the tawny eyes'
examination and the blood rushed to her cheeks.
'You can come up to my apartment.' Carl's voice was clipped and
harsh, so very different from that gentle voice which, so long ago, had
comforted Renny in her distress. What a transformation I She had
expected some change, but never anything so marked as this.
Renny's eyes slid to the Chinese girl, who was still very puzzled, and
frowning a little. She had withdrawn her arm from Carl's and was
regarding her long, beautifully-shaped fingernails with a sort of mild
interest, but the frown of puzzlement was still there. She was listening
intently to what Carl and Renny were saying.
'Yes, that will do fine. Your apartment is in the hotel, I'm told.'
'Told?' repeated Carl briefly.
'I enquired at police headquarters for you,' Renny explained. 'They
told me you had a penthouse here, at the Zephyr.'
'I see...' Turning, he spoke to Masie, using Chinese so that Renny
would not be able to understand. The girl pouted and her frown
deepened. But she shrugged her shoulders nevertheless and sauntered
off, towards the lounge.
"This way.' Carl swung a hand negligently. 'I have a private lift.'
Renny followed, her legs still weak. She stood beside her husband as
the lift whirled up to the top of the high building and wished her
nerves were not so tensed. Carl was regarding her in silence,
examining her in profile. She swallowed and coloured up ... and
wished she were somewhere else.
Carl did not speak until they were in his sitting- room, an incredible
apartment with Imperial Chinese decor and furnishings. Carl invited
Renny to sit down, which she did, right on the edge of a low armchair,
deeply cushioned but with carved sides and arms. Carl spoke softly,
from the other side of the room, and asked her what she wanted to talk
to him about.
'A divorce,' she answered, swallowing hard. 'I want to get married
again.'
Carl's eyes flicked over her, his mouth curving in contempt. Renny
stared, fascinated, thinking of the charming young man she had
married,- the gentle, compassionate man of twenty-three, who had
gone for ever, replaced by a harsh-featured and arrogant stranger with
a mouth too thin and eyes as hard as stone.
'You came all this way to say that to me?' He was standing with his
back to a vast grille of ornate wrought-iron covered with gold leaf,
and behind the grille, which was close to the wall and covering the
entire length of it, was a brilliantly-coloured mural depicting a
Chinese garden. 'How did you know I was here?'
'I wasn't sure, but I thought it likely, as you'd said that if you hadn't
met me then you would have gone to Singapore to live.' Renny
moved uneasily on her chair. 'I want to talk, Carl, there's so much to
say.'
'Then say it,' curtly and without a sign that he had heard either the
apology in her tone or the faintly- pleading accents that were meant to
soften him a little. His eyes swept her figure, resting for a moment on
the firm contours of her breasts. She coloured painfully, saw him
smile at her discomfiture, and those tawny eyes took on the kind of
expression that made her want to get up and flee from his austere and
contemptuous presence.
But instead she looked at him and said,
'The way I ran out on you, Carl. It was a dreadful thing to do, but at
the time --' She shook her head in a little gesture of helplessness and
regret. 'I didn't know what I was doing.'
'All you did know was that you had to get back to your fianc.
Couldn't you have come to me first, and explained it all, instead of
writing a note like that?'
She nodded guiltily.
'Yes, indeed. I have no excuse to offer, only a sincere apology.'
Carl said after a pause,
'What happened? You obviously didn't marry the man. Did you live
with him, perhaps?' A sneer edged his voice as his eyes flicked her
contemptuously. 'You've parted, I suppose, and now you've met
someone else and want to get married, is that it?'
Renny was shaking her head even before he had finished speaking.
'No, you have it all wrong! It isn't like that at all,' she went on
protestingly. 'I didn't live with Paul.'
'Then what happened?'
'He hated me for getting married when I believed he'd just been
killed. I expect there was some excuse for the attitude he took.'
'He hated you?' Carl frowned, then shrugged. 'Why didn't you come
back to me?'
Renny had expected this question; she supposed it was the obvious
one he would put to her. She was about to tell him that she had
returned to his flat but that it was too late; he had left. But, owing to
his contemptuous expression, and because of the cold reception he
had given her and the complete lack of friendliness, her pride came to
the fore. She had come prepared to show contrition and ask his
forgiveness; she had not come prepared to adopt a pose of abject
humility. And so she omitted to inform him that she had returned,
hoping he would forgive her, and vowing to help him over his own
unhappiness.
'I felt it was no use,' was all she said. 'After all, you and I were mere
strangers.'
'At that time, yes, but we wouldn't always have been strangers.' For a
moment his voice had lost its harshness and she wished she had not
decided on the omission.
'About the divorce, Carl. Will it take long?'
'It all depends,' he answered, unmoved.
'On what?' Something bordering on uneasiness touched her senses.
'You wouldn't defend it, surely?'
The tawny eyes were inscrutable.
'I might.' He walked over to the window and stood looking down into
the hectic hurry and bustle of Orchard Road. Was he hiding his
expression? wondered Renny as she sat staring at his broad back. Or
was he just being deliberately rude?
'But it won't do you any good to defend it,' she pointed out. 'If I want a
divorce I can get one,'
'Eventually, yes,' he agreed. 'But it will take much longer.'
Renny frowned in puzzlement.
'I can't see any reason at all why you should want to defend it,' she
said, and he turned round then, slowly, and his eyes swept over her
face, her lovely curves, her shapely legs and ankles.
'You've grown very beautiful.' His voice held an unfathomable
inflection; the tawny eyes were veiled. 'Tell me about yourselfNo,
tell me about this man first,' he amended. 'This man you want to
marry.' His manner had changed to one of arrogant command and
Renny bristled, flashing him an angry glance. But her voice was
gentle when she spoke, as she began telling him a good deal about
Gordonhow she had come to work for him, as his private and
confidential secretary.
'So you came here as his secretary, not to find me?' Carl spoke when
at length Renny paused. 'How long will you be in Singapore?'
'About a year. I did come as Gordon's secretary, but I wanted to find
you, Carl. It was an excellent opportunity of meeting you and
discussing the divorce. As I've, mentioned, you said you'd have come
here to live if you hadn't met me, so it seemed probable that this is
where you'd be now.' 'Now?' with a lift of his brows. 'It's eight years
since I said I'd come to Singapore.'
She nodded.
'I wasn't sure of finding you, but as Gordon had the chance of this job
it seemed a good idea for us to come.'
Carl said nothing for the moment. When he did speak it was to ask
Renny if she would like a drink.
'I'd enjoy a cup of coffee,' she said.
Carl rang a bell, then looked down at her again.
'Yes,' he murmured almost to himself, 'you've grown very beautiful.'
A pause and then, 'Life appears to have treated you kindly, after your
experience.'
'I was fortunate in getting the post with Gordon,' she admitted.
'You mentioned that you share a flat with someone.'
Renny wondered if he were talking for talking's sake, as he waited for
the response to his ringing of the bell. A Chinese boy came, entering
after knocking softly on the door. Carl ordered coffee, then asked
Renny if she wanted anything to eat, glancing at his watch at the same
time.
'No, thank you, Carl. I'll be having my lunch in a short while.'
'You're staying at the Mandarin, you said.' Carl spoke as the Chinese
boy left the room. 'You'll be having your lunch there?'
'Yes, Gordon's had to go into the office, so I shall be taking it on my
own.'
It never occurred to her that Carl would seize this as an opening for an
invitation to lunch. He had been almost hostile to her several times
during their conversation, so the invitation took her completely by
surprise.
'Lunch with you ... here?'
Carl nodded.'Yes; we have a very charming restaurant right at the top
with a view similar to this.'
She found herself wondering why she was accepting his offer instead
of voicing an instant refusal. It was as though she were once again an
eighteen-year-old who had neither the wish nor the strength to oppose
the desires of the man who had saved her life and who was soon to
become her husband.
'That would be nice, Carl. Thank you for asking me.' He said nothing
and she added after a space, 'It will give us the opportunity of talking
about the divorce.'
'Will it?' with a sort of bored disinterest. 'Ah, here's Willy with the
coffee.' He told the boy to put the tray on a table. 'We'll pour it
ourselves, thank you,' he said, and the boy left at once.
Watching him pour it into fine china cups Renny wondered just how
self-sufficient Carl was. She thought about the Chinese girl, Masie,
and dwelt for a moment on their relationship. The girl was glamorous,
exceptionally attractive. Would Carl marry her once the divorce was
through? Perhaps, but if he had wanted to marry her he would have
sought a divorce himself.
'You take sugar still?' Carl had poured her coffee; he held a silver
sugar bowl towards her. It was incredible that he had remembered she
took sugar 1
'Yes, please.'
She felt shy and awkward as he came closer ... very close ... She sat,
motionless, every nerve stirred as she ieaifeed that she was suddenly
aware of him as a man, of his vital personality, and of his subtle
reserve which, putting him on a separate plane from herself,
awakened the desireperhaps born of piqueto break down that
reserve and make him notice her as a woman.
She smiled up at him, held out her hand for the cup.
She took sugar from the bowl and thanked him. And all the time their
eyes held, his unfathomable, hers soft and gentle and yet faintly
bewildered because she was not at all sure of what she was trying to
do.
All she knew was that .Gordon seemed to be a million miles away at
this moment!

CHAPTER THREE
'So you had lunch with him it' Gordon and Renny were in the
Mezzanine Lounge at the Mandarin, having a drink before dinner.
Gordon had only just returned, and he told Renny that he must go into
work the following day. 'Did you discuss the divorce amicably?'
Renny paused, thinking of that lunch, and of her desire to talk about
the divorce but of her meek response when her husband suggested
they leave it for another time. This meal ought to be a friendly
interlude, he had said, seeing that they had not met for eight years.
'And, after all,' he had added unfathomably, 'we are husband and
wife, aren't we?'
Renny had known strange qualms then, but had thrust them away,
aware that her main desire was to enjoy the meal... and Carl's
company. -
'We didn't talk about the divorce,' she admitted at last. 'There seemed
to be other things to talk about.'
'Other things?' frowned Gordon. 'What other things?'
Renny shrugged and said,
'Carl talked about his life herethe hotels he owned, or partly
owned, in other places, such as Bali and Penang. I talked about
myself...' Again she shrugged. 'The time just flew, and he brought me
back here.'''
'But your whole objective was to talk about the divorce, surely?'
Gordon was plainly puzzled, and Renny could not blame him.
'I'm meeting him again tomorrow.'
'I see. Where are you meeting him?'
'We didn't make any firm arrangements. I said I'd phone him if you
were going to be away tomorrow you did mention that you might
have to go to the office.'
'Yes, I did.' Gordon paused; Renny knew he was far from pleased,
and again she could not blame him. After all, she was acting rather
strangely, this she was more than willing to admit. 'Supposing,' went
on Gordon quietly, 'I hadn't been going into the office tomorrow?'
Renny looked at him swiftly.
'Then I'd have to fix another time, I suppose.'
'But as it is, you're intending to phone him and arrange to see him
tomorrowand have lunch with him again, no doubt.' Anger now in
his voice and Renny bit her lip. What was the matter with her? she
wondered. She seemed to be affected by Carl in some unfathomable
way which pulled on both nerves and mind.
She thought she must be crazy, but she knew she would far rather it
had been Carl sitting there than Gordon...
'I promised to phone him, yes,' she admitted. 'And I expect we shall
discuss the divorce.'
'I hope so, Renny,' responded Gordon stiffly. 'The sooner it's all
sorted out the better.'
She nodded but said nothing. Her eyes, moving rather absently
around the room, settled on the man at the keys of the grand piano. He
was playing a light melody, but she-had to strain to hear it above the
chatter going on at a nearby table where a lovely Malay girl dressed
in a brilliantly-coloured sarong and keb- aya laughed and chatted
with three more people as they drank their cocktails.
Gordon was silent too, and suddenly Renny felt miserable, wishing
she had not come here. She and Gordon had never had one cross
word, nor had there been one awkward or uneasy moment between
them. But now there was a tenseness which she could not have
analysed, and she felt sure that he would not be able to do so either.
Of course, Carl was the cause of itand she, Renny, was to blame.
She had not been able to give her fiance the answer he had eagerly
expected when she told him that she had at last plucked up sufficient
courage to meet her husband.
They parted a short while later, each going to their room to change.
There was to be a Dragon Dance in the hotel after dinner, when a
troupe of ten boys would 'man' the dragon, which was over thirteen
feet in length. Renny had been looking forward to it,---but now
everything seemed to have fallen flat.
Gordon was cool and silent when then met again at eight o'clock in
the Clipper Bar. Neither spoke much over dinner, nor during the
entertainment afterwards, and Renny breathed a sigh of relief when
eventually it was time for them to go to their rooms. Gordon
accompanied her to hers but left her outside the door. She went in,
tears starting to her eyes at his coolness. And yet she was honest
enough to admit that he was justified in adopting this particular
attitude. He must be greatly puzzledand disappointedthat the
divorce had not been discussed.

The following morning they met at the breakfast table. Gordon
seemed to have recovered from his moroseness, but he was firm in his
request that when Renrfy saw Carl today she must thrash out the
matter of the divorce.
'I intend to,' she assured him, and she meant it. Yesterday they had
loitered over lunch and when afterwards Carl had suggested a stroll
Renny had readily agreed, eager to see something of the city. Carl
took her off the main thoroughfares and she was intrigued by the
activities of the peoplethe barefoot coolies in their dhotis, but
alongside them were more sophisticated Singaporeans in collars and
ties carrying transistors or modern shopping bags. A wizened
Chinese stood over an outdoor stove cooking crabs, over which he
poured the delicious chili sauce which Renny had already tasted, and
liked. Another food trader was making satay, and another man, a
Malay, was barbecuing some other kind of meat on long splints of
bamboo cane. There were plenty of tourists about, with cameras
snapping, and small children watched them, slant- eyed and smiling.
Renny had no intention of either being sidetracked over the question
of the divorce, or persuaded to walk with her husband, even though
she freely admitted to herself that she had enjoyed every moment of
it. But she felt guilty at not having mentioned the stroll to Gordon. It
was deceitful, she decided and, therefore, was firm in her intention of
leaving Carl as soon as their lunch was finished. By that time she
hoped he would have agreed not to defend the divorcein fact, she
could not understand his ever having said that he might do so.
She telephoned him immediately she had said goodbye to Gordon at
the front of the hotel. The firm had sent a car for him and he sat in the
back, with a uniformed chauffeur driving him. He waved and smiled
and Renny felt much happier than she had last night.
Carl answered the phone, as she had got through on
x
his private line.
He gave no indication as to whether he-was pleased or not that she
was taking lunch with him. They would go to the Raffles Hotel, he
said. He came to the Mandarin for her, his eyes immediately taking in
what she was wearing. She had on a white cotton skirt, tiered and
trimmed with a printed mat-, erial at the hem and waist. The matching
blouse wassleeveless and low-cut with tiny decorative pleats running
up each side of the buttons. Her sandals were white and so was her
shoulder-bag. Her hair shone, draping her shoulders. She had used a
lovely perfume and a little lipstick, that was all.
Carl's tawny eyes flickered strangely; Renny tried to ignore their
expression, but whatever her mind had decided it could not control
the little throb of excitement that affected her senses. No doubt at all
that her husband was an impressive man, and an inordinately
handsome one as well!
And he was interested in her as a woman...
The Raffles Hotel was in the same luxury class as the Mandarin and
the Zephyr and Renny could not help thinking how fortunate she was
to be sitting here, in the restaurant called the Elizabethan Grill, eating
delicious local dishes and drinking expensive wine. Carl, sitting
opposite to her, asked her if the food was to her liking.
'It's delicious!' Somehow, this didn't seem the right moment to broach
the subject of the divorce but, driven by the fear that, if she hesitated,
it might not be broached at all, she said quietly,
'The divorce, Carl. Have you thought any more about it? I mean,
you'll let it go through in a friendly way, won't you?'
He smiled as if he just had to.
'In a friendly way? Seems odd to talk of divorce in the same breath as
friendliness.'
'Perhaps,' she agreed, but went on to remind him that theirs was a
different kind of divorce. There could not possibly be any bitterness
attached to it simply because they had never lived together.
'And come to detest one another?'
She shook her head in protest.
'You sound cynical, Carl.'
'Perhaps I am cynical.' He took up a small piece of Melba toast and
began to butter it. 'If I agree to let the divorce go through without
defending it you could be married to this Gordon by this time next
year.' He spoke softly, almost to himself.
'You say "if you agree to let it go through without defending it. Surely
you have no reason to defend it, Carl?'
He looked at her, his eyes resting for a moment on her lovely face
before travelling to her curves, then to her hands, one of which was
resting on the white tablecloth, the other holding her fork. It seemed a
tense and intimate moment, with the deep silence that had fallen only
adding to that intimacy. Again Renny was conscious of the throb of
excitement she had experienced before ... and again her fiance
seemed to be a million miles away ...
She said, swallowing hard because her throat felt dry all at once,
, 'Please, Carl, don't defend the divorce. What good can it do you? I
shall get it in the end.'
He nodded, but absently; she knew instinctively that he was busy
with thoughts of his own.
But at last he said,
'You're quite sure that you've made the right choice this time?'
'Of course I've made the right choice,' she answered, a sharp edge to
her voice. *What a thing to ask!'
'Is it so strange?' Carl spoke with a trace of contempt in his voice. 'It's
your third choice, remember.'
She coloured, his sardonic smile angering her.
'That was neither nice nor reasonable,' she retorted.
'It wasn't meant to be nice. It was certainly not unreasonable, seeing
that it was the truth.'
'Even the truth can be unreasonable!'
'Sometimes, maybe, but not in this instance.' Carlturned his head,
recognising a tall Chinese man as he skirted the next table. A greeting
passed, but as it was spoken in Chinese Renny could not understand
it. 'You might not like it brought before you, Renny, but you can't
alter the fact that you've been engaged twice and married onceand
what age are you? Twenty- six.' He pursed his lips thoughtfully. 'Not
bad. I wonder what your record will be by the time you're forty.' He
was watching her, his smile taunting and amused. Her colour
deepened/ but her chin lifted and there was a sparkle in her eye as she
said,
'You talk to me like this, and yet maintain you're not being
unreasonable! You know very well how it was. I became engaged to
Paul with the firm intention of marrying him --'
'But you now know that he wasn't the right one for you,' interrupted
Carl suavely.
'As it turned out, yes,' she admitted. 'Then you married me, and
decided again that I wasn't the right man for you.' Carl paused, eyeing
her with a quizzical expression not untinged with contempt. 'And
now you're engaged again --'
'Oh, stop!' she broke in irritably. 'What is all this leading up to?'
'As your husband,' was his calm rejoinder, 'I feel a certain
responsibility as regards your welfare. I'm not at all sure that this man
is right for you.' Renny stared in disbelief.
'You might be my husband, Carl, but we knew each otber-' for only
four, days, remember. You have no authority over me at all.'
'No?' Even the one word carried a stern inflection, but Carl made no
further comment, his mind being on what Renny had said at first.
'Four days,' he. repeated, reflectively. 'Was that all? How very
impulsive we were --' He laughed unexpectedly, a cynical laugh that
grated on Renny's sensitive ears. 'Such are the follies of youth. I was
twenty-three and you were eighteen a truly delightful age. I guess I
could have moulded you to something that would have pleased me,
had I had the chance --'
'I wish you'd stop!' flared Renny, beginning to lose her temper. 'Does
the past matter? And another thing: you said I'd had three men in my
life. Well, you've had three women, so what's the difference?'
'Three?' Carl's expression was enigmatic. 'How do you know how
many women I've had in my life?'
'All right, I don't! You were engaged before I met you. Then you
married me, and now you have Masie.'
'Masie...' He nodded, but his expression was still unreadable. 'She's
very beautifulmost Chinese girls are when they're young. But their
beauty doesn't last, unfortunately.' He gestured towards a far table.
'The lady you see there was once a famous beauty.'
Renny turned her head. The woman was alone at a corner table. Her
face was drawn, as if the skin merely hung where healthy flesh had
once filled if, her lips were bloodless, her eyes deep-sunk but still
alert. Her greying hair was wispy, like straw parched under a hot sun.
Carl said, as Renny turned again,
'They don't grow old gracefully in the East. You, now, will still be
beautiful when you're seventy or more.'
She looked at him, deeply affected by his flattery. She murmured,
speaking her thoughts aloud,
'You're not intending to marry Masie, then?'
'Marry her?' with a look, of surprise. 'Can you imagine my being
married to her?'
'Well... no ...'
'In any case, I am married.'
Renny gave a sigh.
'We're having a divorce,' she said firmly.
'So you say. However, as I mentioned, I'm not at all satisfied that this
man is right for you. I must meet him. When will it be convenient for
me to do so?'
Again she sighed, but this time resignedly.
'If you insist on meeting Gordon, then perhaps you'll join us for
dinner this evening?'
'I shall be delighted,' was his gracious response.
An hour later Renny was in her room at the Mandarin, writing to
Clare. She then wrote to two colleagues who had exacted a promise
from her to write and tell them all about Singapore. After that she
went out, having decided to take a cruise in the harbour. It took only a
couple of hours, with the boat leaving the Clifford Pier at four o'clock
in the afternoon.
She paid her money and boarded. A torrential shower had just
brought everything to a standstill,, with people scurrying to shelter in
the arcades and a forest of umbrellas shooting up by their hundreds.
But now the sun was out again as bright as before, bringing its
delightful warmth and drying up the newly- washed pavements.
The sea was smooth as the boat rode the busy harbour where massive
ocean liners were docked beside tankers and sampans, and freighters
looking so rusty that they seemed scarcely to be seaworthy. There
was an island with a temple sanctuary, there were the picturesque
kelongsfish traps on. stiltsand the Malay villages which were
also on stilts. Renny could newer, even have begun to sort out the
hotch-potch of vessels any more than she could have counted the
ships' flags, since there were hundreds of them flying in this, the
fourth largest port in the world. On the smaller craft men could be
seen cooking on deck, and over the air drifted the appetising smell of
curry to mingle with the less pleasant smell of oil and the natural salty
tang of the water itself. A huge junk floated into sight, then was lost
among the vast number of other vessels anchored or sailing smoothly
in to drop their anchors.
Renny was spellbound, fascinated by the tremendous activity going
on around her. The traffic streamed unceasingly, the cargoes being
dealt with at an incredible speed.
At last the trip was over and she was on her way back to the hotel,
walking through the busy streets where the decorating was still going
on in preparation for the New Year, which was without doubt the
most important festival of the Chinese calendar.
Reaching the hotel at length, Renny entered the lobby and as always
she stood in wonderment, surveying the incredible decor while at the
same time marvelling that it could be so opulent and yet retain an air
of perfect taste and beauty. The designer obviously possessed
unusual talents and imagination.
She went to the desk for her key, and was handed a note.
'For me?' She looked with some surprise at the Chinese clerk who had
passed her the note along with her key.
'Yes, Miss Colbert.'
She moved away, nerves beginning to tingle as she thought that the
message might be from Carl. Had he changed his mind about coming
to dinner this evening?
But the message was from Gordon. He had phoned through earlier to
say he wouldn't be back before eleven o'clock at the earliest as he'd
had to go to the industrial town of Jurong, which was four hours by
car from the city. It depended on what time he left, of course, but he
was sure he would not be back at the Mandarin before eleven
although, he warned, it could be midnight or later, so he advised
Renny to have an early dinner and go to her room to read or to watch
the television.
She phoned down from her room to find out what time the message
had come, and frowned on hearing that it had arrived before lunch.
Had she received it before meeting Carl she would not have invited
him to dinner. Should she ring him and put him off?
Strangely, she felt no guilt at her decision to dine with Carl alone, but
she did spare a thought to what Gordon's reaction might be. That he
would be far from pleased was possiblein fact, it was almost a
certainty. Yet Renny could not bring herself to reach for the phone
and ring through to the Zehpyr Hotel...

She wore a black tiered taffeta skirt with a jewel-toned Lurex top,
gathered at the off-shoulder neckline and falling loosely over the
waist of the skirt. Her hair, shining and long, was held subtly at the
left side by a slide of Ming jade which she had bought that morning
before going to lunch with Carl. A long and critical look in the mirror
gave back a picture of unsophisticated elegance and Renny gave a
satisfied sigh as, finally, she sprayed perfume on her hair and wrists.
Her mind was in a sort of half-daze, for she admitted with one part of
it that she ought not to be going to all this trouble with her appearance
for any man other than Gordon, but with the other part she owned to
an excitement that was totally inexplicable. It was like playing with
fire ... but convinced that she could keep everything under control.
She met Carl in one of the lounges and explained about Gordon's
absence, aware as she spoke that Carl's eyes were roving her body,
taking in what she was wearing, and how well it suited her. She hoped
she sounded casual and apologetic as she made excuses for Gordon's
absence, but she rather thought that Carl might suspect that she had
not been averse to dining alone with him. His enquiry served to
strengthen this idea as he said, a hint of sardonic amusement in his
voice,
'The object of my dining here was, if you remember, in order that I
could meet this Gordon you're supposed to be in love with.'
'Yes.' She knew a little access of anger at the word 'supposed' but
quelled it successfully. 'Yes, that was the object of your coming to
dine here.'
His tawny eyes fixed hers.
'You could have rung me, putting off the dinner until another
evening.'
She nodded, scarcely knowing what to say in answer to this. Carl was
making her feel awkward, embarrassed even. He was so superbly
masculine and superior in a white suit of finest linen, beautifully cut
but casual in .that-the jacket fitted loosely, and it was open to reveal, a
pale blue shirt and a Thai silk tie, hand- embroidered in dark blue to
contrast with the colour of the tie itself and the shirt. One hand was
casually thrust into his pocket; in the other he held an un- lighted
cigarette. He broke the silence as he realised that Renny had nothing
to say, asking her what she would like in the way of an aperitif.
They sat down after he had ordered, and again Renny was subjected
to an examination of her clothes before Carl's gaze settled on her face.
'You're looking- particularly beautiful tonight,' he remarked, leaning
back a little as the drinks were brought and put on the table. 'I feel
rather proud of my wife.'
Renny blinked at him. There was something un-nerving about his
manner which caused her to inject a sharpness into her voice as she
said,
'I'm not your wife, Carl; not in any real sense, I mean.'
'We were married, remember?'
Renriy felt a chill sweep through her.
'Being tied must be just as tiresome to you as it is to .me, Carl.'
'I've never found it tiresome.' Carl's eyes were staring fixedly in to
hers. 'Nor, it seems, have you until recently.'
'No,' she admitted, 'because I didn't want to get married.'
'But now you do?'
'Of course I do,' impatiently as she watched him bring out a lighter
and apply it to his cigarette.
'And you feel sure you Jove this man?' Carl's voice was very quiet,
expressionless ... and somehow carrying an inflexible quality that
increased her uneasiness.
'I love him,' she returned, picking up her sherry glass from the table
and taking a sip. 'I shouldn't be thinking of marrying him if I weren't
in love with him, should I?'
'I don't know,' dryly as he too picked up his glass. 'The workings of
the female mind are beyond my comprehension.'
She coloured, saw him lift an eyebrow as if what he observed was
something to appreciate. She said, instinct being responsible for the
question,
'You're thinking not only of me, but of your fiancee the one who
jilted you, I mean?'
He nodded without hesitating.
'She discovered she'd made a mistake and decided to divorce the man
and then she and I would pick up again, all nice and cosy and
uncomplicated.' The sarcasm, mingling with a measure of contempt,
brought an unpleasant edge to his strong deep voice. 'What is it that
makes women so impulsive? Do they live merely for the moment,
letting the future take care of itself?'
'You've become cynical, Carl.' Regret touched Renny's voice. She
thought of the man she had married and found herself wishing he had
not been destroyed by disillusionmenta disillusionment of which
she herself had been an important part.
'You're very right, I am cynical. Who wouldn't be in my position?'
'One day,' responded Renny softly, 'you'll find the girl of your
dreams.' The words were scarcely out when he laughed, laughed
heartily as if at some very amusing joke.
'The girl of my dreams, eh? The female with her romanticism!
Where, for heaven's sake, is your real- , ism? Must everything be seen
through rose-tinted glasses?' He looked at her through a thin veil of
blue smoke rising from his cigarette. 'No wonder women spend half
their lives recovering from disillusionment!'
Renny's colour deepened, this time with anger.
'How do you know we spend half our lives recovering from
disillusionment?'
'I have the usual amount of perception. The girl who jilted me is still
trying to get over her disillusionmentthis eight years after she
decided that this other man was the only one in her life.'
Puzzled, Renny said, forgetting her anger of a moment ago,
'You see this girl, then?'
'She comes over here several times a year.'
'She has friends here?'
'Yes. Two are married to. businessmen who work mainly in
Singapore.'
'I see...' Renny looked thoughtful. 'You're with her every time she
comes?'
'Oh ' carelessly as he drew on his cigarette. 'We go about together. It's
all very pleasant, and passes some of the time away for her.'
'Youcouldn't take up again, where you left off?'
'One should never go back, so it's said..Carl's voice faded, slowly, as
his glance flickered over his wife's lovely face to her hair, shining and
clean and enticing. 'That's what's said, but perhaps...' Again that
unfathomable drifting away of his voice to silence.
Renny wished she had not decided to dine with him alone. He
bewildered her, and bewilderment brought a strange fear which she
failed entirely to understand. She looked with relief at the waiter who
brought the menu, handing it to her. Another was brought to Carl,
along with the wine list, and for a few minutes both she and he were
absorbed in choosing their food. Renny had chosen to dine in the
fabulous Belvedere Restaurant where French food was served against
a background of candlelight and violin music. The Belvedere was one
of six different restaurants which the Mandarin boasted, and was
recommended by the management as just the place for 'special
occasion' dining. Why had she chosen it? It was all wrong, being here
with Carl. Gordon was bound to be angry ...
Need she tell him? Renny shook her head, despising herself, angry
that she had not telephoned Carl to inform him that the man he
particularly wanted to see would not be here for dinner and so they
had better make another date.
Well, what was done was done, thought Renny philosophically. She
might as well try to enjoy the meal... and the company.
They dined on subtly-spiced French food washed down with a
delectable vintage wine. The famous variety of cheese which was a
feature of the restaurant was tempting beyond anything Renny had
ever imagined. In addition was the unique salad trolley from where
one could choose one's own ingredients and dressing, designing a
new salad. The sweets were mouth-watering, the coffee superb. Carl
chatted amicably enough, but on the two occasions when Renny tried
to broach the subject of the divorce he changed the subject in such a
way that after the second attempt she gave up.
After dinner they danced. It was an experience that set all Renny's
nerves on edge. For Carl's whole manner was one of total
possessivenessit was revealed in the way he held her, the way his
face came close to hers and stayed there, in the way his firm and
masterful hold tightened each time she attempted to draw away from
his body.
At last he decided it was time he left. Renny, more bewildered than
everthis time by her own feelings could not honestly have said
whether she was glad the evening had ended or not. What she had no
doubts about was that she would never even mention this evening to
her fianc.
'Do you still want to see Gordon?' she asked as Carl was leaving.
'Certainly. Ring me and we'll make another date.'
'He'll be here tomorrow evening,' she said.
'Then call me.' His voice was abrupt; Renny felt sure he was now
anxious to get away.
'I will. Perhaps we'll have dinner here tomorrow evening?' She was
talking for the sake of it. wanting to keep him...?
She was in her room at last, standing at the high window, staring
down the street to where the soft lights of the Zephyr Hotel filtered
through the palms to cast a golden glow on to the pavement. She was
doubtful if she would sleep, but eventually she undressed and got into
bed. It was a quarter to eleven. The phone rang and within minutes
she was speaking to Gordon, then hearing him say, deep apology in
his voice,
'Darling, I have to be here for another couple of days. They've had
some trouble and are relying on me to sort it out.' He paused, but she
did not speak. 'I'll ring you again tomorrow ... Are you all right?' he
asked when she remained so quiet.
'Yesyes, of course, darling.'
'You went to your room early? I couldn't phone you before, sweet,
because I was hard at it on the job.' He paused a second. 'What time
did you dine? Were you lonely?'
'Er --'
'You must have been, my dearest. Have you been reading in your
room?'
Renny's mouth was dry. She hated herself and hated her husband
even more. She could not bring herself to voice a lie and felt the
terrible suspense of Gordon's asking her something which would
force from her an answer that would astonish and disgust him. But
like a miracle he was saying, obviously having thought he had heard
her say 'yes' to his query,
'Good girl! I know it's dull for you, darling, but I don't want you going
out without me. Do the same tomorrow night, and the next. I should
be with you after that. Sorry about it all, but it's out of my hands.
Goodnight, my love.'
'Goodnight, darling ...'
She held the receiver long after he had rung off, staring at it and
wondering what her husband had done to her. For although she
fiercely tried to deny it ... she was glad that her fiance was away, and
would be for the next two days.

CHAPTER FOUR
RENNY sat back against the cushions of the settee and watched Carl
mixing her a drink. Her brow was furrowed, her mind in a whirl as
she asked herselfby no means for the first timewhat it was about
her husband that attracted her so much that she was scarcely aware of
her engagement to Gordon. For two flays she and Carl had been
together, happy days for Renny as he took her sightseeing to places
like the fantastic Tiger Balm Gardens, a Confucian Disneyland
conceived by the Aw brothersAw Boon Par, whose name when
translated meant 'The Leopard,' and Aw Boon Haw, 'The Tiger', and
Chinatown where she had seen the Old Quarter of Singapore where
artisans of many trades could be found doing the same work that their
forefathers did so long ago. The lantern-maker's shop fascinated her,
and the noodle factory and the candle- maker's. From there Carl had
taken her to visit a Malay mosque and a Chinese Buddhist sanctuary,
and then on to an Indian Hindu temple.
The same evening he had taken her to dine at the Raffles Hotel where
they ate in the romantic atmosphere of the Palm Court Grill, an
open-air restaurant where palms waved in the - breeze and the sound
of music mingled with the whispers made by their foliage. It
happened to be Malayan Night and this proved to be a real treat for
Renny, who sat enthralled by the entertainment put on for the guests.
There was a mock wedding, with the Malay bride poised on a throne
while her groom and his followers paraded around, and then the
groom, offering the bride's lady-in-waiting a tip, at last managed to
glimpse his new wife. There were several dances, one of which was
the Balinese Dance depicting a scene from the famous Ramayana.
Another dance was the Tari Orang Darat, an aboriginal rendering of a
dance of warriors and death. The Candle Dance was Renny's
favourite, where a princess, having lost her engagement ring, enlisted
the help of all the palace maidens who searched for it with lighted
candles.
It was well after midnight when Carl brought her back to her hotel.
He said he would call for her the following morning, to take her on
another sightseeing tour ... and she had meekly agreed to go with him.
He turned, with the glass in his hand, and stood for , a moment,
looking at her across the room. They were in the sitting-room of his
penthouse, after a full day out. Renny had been back to the Mandarin
to change for dinner, which Carl had ordered" to be brought up later,
when' they had had their drinks.
He came towards her, tall and poised, immaculate in white linen, his
hair brushed and shining, his skin clear and bronzed, his expression
masked by the faint smile that touched his eyes and his mouth.
'Thank you, Carl.' Renny accepted the drink and put the glass on a
table at her elbow. 'We're having dinner here, in this room?' She
glanced round at the incredible red and gold decor.
'Yes, I thought it would be pleasant to be entirely on our own, just for
once. After all, it might be the only opportunity we shall have, as this
man Gordon will, you say, be returning tomorrow some time.'
This man Gordon ... Invariably Carl referred to her fiance in that way,
and there was always a sting to the words, and the hint of satire which
Renny was finding most unpleasant.
'Gordon rang me early this morning to say he'd be back, yes,' she said.
The tawny eyes stared into hers.
'You're happy at his coming?'
'Of course! I don't know what makes you ask me a question like that.
Gordon and I are in love.'
'In love?' Carl's lips twisted in a sardonic smile. 'I believe I've already
expressed my doubts about that,' he said, picking up his glass and
taking a drink.
'We'll not argue the point, if you don't mind, Carl,' returned Renny
stiffly.
Carl sat down in a big armchair, and stretched out his long limbs in
front of him, hitching a trouser leg before leaning back against the
cushions.
'Tell me,' he said after a pause, 'have you enjoyed these two days
we've had together?'
'Very much, Carl,' she replied honestly.
'Supposing this Gordon wasn't returning yet awhile --'
'But he is returning, so the question you were about to ask doesn't
arise.'
The interruption was swift, bringing a faint smile to her husband's
lips.
'Afraid of it, eh? You don't know how you would answer? I believe,
my dear, that already you're asking yourself if you really are in love
with this other man.' He paused to give her the chance to speak, but
she remained silent and he went on, 'If I asked you whether you
would like these past two days to be extended you'd have to say
yes'
'I would not!' interrupted Renny almost fiercely. 'I want Gordon
backof course I want him back!'
'Who,' enquired her husband quietly, 'are you trying to
convinceyourself or me?' Again she made no reply. Carl watched
her for a space, noticing the heightened colour, the nervous way she
was twisting her fingers in her lap. 'You and I have had a most
pleasant time, both finding something attractive in the company of
the other. It's a pity that your friend is returning so soon. I feel we'd
have enjoyed a few more days together.'
Renny picked up her glass and held it thoughtfully, without drinking.
She recalled the incident of yesterday morning when Carl, ringing
he;- up, had asked casually if Gordon had returned, and Rennyfor
no reason that she could explainhad the strange suspicion that Carl
knew very well that Gordon had not returned. However, she
answered, saying that: he would be away for two days. At which Carl
had immediately invited her to spend the day with him, and she had
found herself accepting. And that was how they came to spend the
two days together, and the evening of yesterday. After a full day's
sightseeing today Carl had said that it would be more restful if they
had dinner at his home, and again she agreed to his suggestion. He
was looking at her now, waiting for a response to what he had just
said. Renny took a drink before she spoke; And when she did speak it
was to remind him that she had not come to Singapore to enjoy
herself with him, but to discuss the matter of a divorce.
'I want my freedom so that I can marry Gordon,' she added finally.
Gordon... Where was his face in her vision? Impossible to focus
itor perhaps she did see something, a blurred and remote image of
someone she had known a long time ago ... '
'You're very determined about that?'
She shook her head impatiently.
'I don't know why you're taking this attitude, Carl. It isn't as if you
have anything to lose by my gaining my freedom. On the contrary,
you'll feel much better to be free.'
No answer. Carl sipped his sherry, falling into a thoughtful mood
which brought a slight frown to his forehead. He said presently,
'You were telling me you'd never used your married name. And
you're here at the Mandarin in your maiden name. But surely there
were times when you had to admit to being married?'
She shrugged casually.
'Sometimeswhen I had to produce documents for one reason or
another --'
'Your passport?' he queried softly, his eyes perceptive and yet
annoyingly accusing.
'Is in the name of Colbert,' she told him with a hint of tartness in her
voice. 'One can call oneself anything. It isn't breaking the law to use
one's maiden name, you know!'
'But simpler, surely, to use your real name.*
Impatiently she shook her head.
'I don't understand you, Carl. What can it matter to you what name I
use?'
'A man usually likes his wife to use the name he gave her.'
Carl's voice was tight suddenly, and the tawny eyes glinted in a way
that brought a tremor fluttering along Renny's spine. She found
herself wishing she had not agreed to dine here, in the privacy of this
apartment of his.
She said, looking directly at him,
*You talk as though we really were man and wife. This is not the
case, Carl, and you know it. We're not really married --'
'You've said that before; I reminded you that we did have a ceremony
... which made us husband and wife...'
There was an edge of cold steel to his voice, but it was something else
which troubled Renny, something unfathomable but yet filling her
with a sense of fear ... of danger. She was forcibly reminded of her
impression that she was playing With fire. Playing with fire but with
everything under control. Did she have everything under control,
though? There was no denying that Carl seemed to exert a power over
her that she . could not combat, and that was the reason she was here
now, in his penthouse high above the lighted streets of Singapore, a
long way from other people.
She was just about to say she would prefer to dine in the restaurant
when there was a gentle knock on the door and she realised that the
dinner was soon to be served, in a beautiful flower-draped alcove at
one side of the room. The Chinese servant went softly to it and she
watched candles being lighted. She turned her head, to meet the
inscrutable gaze of her husband. He might have been planning
something, she thought, then dismissed the idea, telling herself she
was being fanciful.
Dining by candlelight had something magical about it and no
mistake. Renny could not but be enchanted with the whole picture
which had been created by the two men who had laid the table and
then served the dinner. Flowers had been arranged in delicate little
posies around the candles which formed individual embellishments
to the covers. A larger branch of candles stood in the middle of the
table, and two at each end, these latter being in orange-coloured
chimneys so that they sent out a warm glow over the table and the
silver and glass.
Intimate ... and romantic ... She thought of Gordon and looked at
Carlhandsome and cultured and very self-possessed in his role of
host to his wife. The food was Chinese, the cold hors d'oeuvres
followed by shark's fin soup and then Yim Guk Kai, a special kind of
chicken cooked buried in salt and served with delicious mushrooms
cooked in batter, and green and red peppers in a bed of fried rice.
'It was all to your liking?'' asked Carl when they had left the table and
were sitting on the balcony with , their coffee and liqueurs.
'It was wonderful!' She spoke with the enthusiasm she was feeling.
The wine had been particularly heady a very expensive one, she
suspectedand in consequence she was feeling that all was right
with the world. She glanced down, at the glittering panorama of lights
and neon signs far below where hurry and bustle was as great as at
any other time of the day. 'There's something magical about this
place,' she said after a long pause.
'Magical?' Carl's mouth curved slightly and she wondered if he was
again being cynical about the feminine idea of romance. 'I expect
there is a certain magic about the Orient,' he added after a moment,
surprising her by his seriousness. 'Here, in Singapore, there's so much
that one doesn't understand. The Chinese are unfathomable, but so are
many of the others we have here. The West seems cold and prosaic
when compared with the exotic East.'
Renny sipped her brandy, and then leant back, unaware that the
position she was in revealed rather more than she would have liked.
The neckline of the dress she wore was very low, extending to a 'V'
where the curves of her breasts were most alluring. The bodice was
held up with nothing more than two narrow straps each fastened with
a small diamante stud. The waistline was high and tight, the skirt full
and finely pleated over a stiff underslip of taffeta. She crossed her
legs, to reveal slim ankles above dainty white kid sandals. Her
husband missed nothing. His eyes moved constantly from her body to
her face, pale and beautiful in the cream-tinted glow from a Chinese
lantern-type lamp above her head, to her honey-brown hair forming a
halo to enhance her features before forming a cloak for her shoulders,
to her eyes, large and thickly fringed by silken lashes that sent
seductive shadows on to her cheeks. She glanced at him to see a
muscle move in his throat, pulsating rapidly, out of his control.
The fear she had previously known entered into her again and she
hurried with her coffee.
'I think I ought to be going, Carl,' she said, forcing a smile to her lips.
'It must be very late.'
'One never thinks of time here, Renny.'
Carl finished his coffee and he rose, reaching out a - hand to take one
of his wife's into it. She shook her head in protest, but was brought to
her feet, trembling and filled with a sort of exquisite feat-that was as
exciting as it was disturbing.
'IIer-Carl, it's late --' The rest was smothered as her mouth was
possessed by his. Fierce and passionate moments throbbed by, and
Renny gave up the struggle after exhausting herself and realising she
already had a few bruises on her body. She thought wildly of the
danger, of the purposeful manner in which she was being held
prisoner within the hawser of steel that was her husband's grip upon
her. The swirling lights spun dizzily up from below; Carl was
laughing softly as with the ease of his build he lifted her and carried
her from the balcony to the sitting- room.
'A beauty if ever there was one!' His mouth, sensuous and totally
possessive, claimed hers again, and she felt the hardness of his body
pressing close to hers ... demanding her surrender. 'You'll not be
going anywhere, my love,' he murmured at last, his mouth seeking
her throat and her shoulder, and then moving to the secret places that
had been tempting him from the moment she had leant back in her
chair. 'At least, not anywhere further than the bedroom --'
'No!' She found the strength at last to break away, and she stood
facing him, her cheeks on fire, her eyes accusing and yet. pleading too
as she realised just how completely in his power she was. 'You're
mad, Carl! We're not married, and you --'
'Not married?' Carl laughed softly, almost to himself. 'Deny me as
your husband if you will,' he said, 'but in a short while you'll know
whether you're married or not.'
She trembled from head to foot, and swallowed convulsively,
attempting to rid her throat of the choking sensation of fear that was
making speech so difficult. A plea edged her voice when finally she
did manage to say to him,
'I want to go, Carl. Please let me leave here at once.'
For a moment he seemed undecided, and then a firmness touched the
thin lips and Renny's heart sank. But she made another endeavour,
reminding him of Masie, but before she could say very much at all he
was laughing again, in that same quiet way that was so much a threat
and a demonstration of his triumph. He caught her to him, his kisses
as fierce and demanding as before. Renny felt light-headed, as if she
were about to swoon and drift right away from the danger that faced
her. Her husband's lips caressed, enticed, masterfully demanded
submission. His hands were gentle but possessive as they slid over
her, their warmth kindling a fire within her which, she knew, could be
her own destruction.
'Carl..." It was a mere whisper now, but an entreaty as well.
'Yes, my love.'
My love ... Which did not mean anything, of course.
'You're as ready as I am for --'
'I'm not!' She stamped a foot and tears welled up into her eyes. 'Why
are you doing this to me?''I don't think I'm doing anything
unreasonable,' he answered with a sort of mild censure. 'I have a
husband's rightsand I've had a long time to wait, you must admit.'
He held her at arms' length, his grip determinedly strong and
inescapable. 'You are ready,' he stated. 'I can see it in those beautiful
eyes of yours. -They're shaded and dreamy with desire.' He laughed
again and she thought there was something demonlike in-the sound.
Indeed, he looked a demon, with those tawny eyes staring into hers,
eyes that smouldered with suppressed passion and glinted with the
light of the victor. His laugh came again; it grated on her ears -and
made her utter, in a voice choked by fear,
'You're inhuman! What have you done to me? I wouldn't put anything
past you!'
'What do you mean?'
She shook her head. She had no idea what she had meant.
'It's ... nothing ...' But Carl was saying slowly, an unfathomable
expression in those demon eyes,
'Are you suggesting, my dear, that I've put a love potion in your
drink?'
Amusement lurked now in the depths of his gaze, but it was lost on
Renny as the words 'love potion' burnt themselves into her mind. This
was the mysterious Orient ... where strange and inexplicable practices
took placed... If her heart had been throbbing before it seemed to
hammer now, causing a breathless sensation of actual terror to rise
within her breast. The colour drained from her face; even her lips
were pale as she said, in a whispered, faltering tone of voice,
'Youyouw-wouldn't ...'
Carl's fine lips twitched.
'Why, then, my wife, are you feeling like thisready to come to me,
and to surrender?' No answer from Renny. Her mouth was too dry for
speech. 'A love potion robs a woman of resistancein fact, it
awakens a desire in her which she can't control.' Another pause, but
still Renny could not speak. 'If I don't satisfy your desires you're
likely to beg me to make love to you --'
'No!' she cried fiercely, finding her voice without much difficulty as
she heard him make that unbelievable statement. 'Nonever!' She
faced him, hands clenched, her cheeks still white, but with fury now,
and her eyes were blazing. Carl's whole attention was arrested by the
picture she made ... and a nerve pulsated madly in the deep hollow of
his cheek. 'You're taunting me! You haven't given me
anything-have you? You wouldn't dare --!' Vigorously she shook
her head, and her hair swayed in glorious disarray about her
shoulders: 'You wouldn't dare!' she repeated. 'Would you?'
He laughed and said,
'You're not sure ... not sure of anything, are you, Renny? It's the
magic you spoke of, the magic of the Orient, which affects people in
strange ways ... especially lovers.'
'You and I are not lovers!'
Carl raised his brows. To Renny this was an affectation that served
only to increase her anger.
'A husband and wife should be lovers,' was his calm rejoinder as he
lifted a hand to stifle a yawnanother affectation, Renny felt sure.
'Especially a husband and wife who've met again after such a long
time. And,' he added in some amusement, 'we did miss our
honeymoon, rememberwith you running out on me like that' His
voice changed dramatically as the last few words left his lips. Renny
shuddered at the harshness in it, and recalled for one fleeting moment
his gentleness, his infinite understanding and his tender care for her in
her need. How could a man change so dramatically? Yet was it so
strange, really? He had suffered the greatest humiliation at the hands
of the two women who had let him down. It must seem to him that her
sex was heartless ... and it would seem that some form of punishment
was already planned for her. She said, making a desperate effort to
calm her frayed unruly nerves,
'This matter ofof a l-love potion'
'I've already pointed out that you're showing distinct signs of having
taken'
'Don't prevaricate!' she broke in fiercely. 'Have you or have you not
put anything in my drink?'
'How puzzled you are, my love.' Smooth the voice and
non-committal. Renny glared at him but said nothing. Was he merely
having fun at her expenseor had he actually given her something to
make her --? She cut her thoughts, but they returned along with the
colour that fused her cheeks, drawn into them by her own completion
of the question which she tried to avoid. Something to ihake her
desire him --Desire him so strongly that she would crave his
lovemaking? Yes, that was what a love potion did to you. Renny .had
read it somewhere --
She made to dodge away as she suddenly realised that her husband
intended taking her into his arms. She soon admitted her attempt was
futile; he gripped her wrist and drew her to him with a strong and
masterful jerk of his hand. His mouth sought hers, tempting as before.
It was no use denying that she was in a state of heightened emotions
from which she would be unable to escape unless she exerted
tremendous will-power. But Carl's hand was caressing her, seeking
beneath the low fold of her dress tp close upon her breast. What price
will-power in face of temptation like this? Mastery was in> every
lingering caress of those strong brown fingers ... mastery and the
arrogant demand for immediate surrender. The man was a fiend! Yet
she had to admit that although she knew anger there was no revulsion
within her, no desperate, all-consuming desire to escape his
caresses --
She instantly connected her feelings with the love potion he had
mentioned and she said in a broken little voice which betrayed both
pleading and despair, 'Tell meplease, Carl, have youhave
yougiven me anything?'
His mouth came close
s
and instead of answering her he touched her
lips with his, keeping one arm around her while his other hand
continued to tempt. When at last he spoke it was to say, in a distinctly
hoarse and throaty bass tone of voice,
'Was there any need, my love?my wife? My powers of persuasion
would be sadly lacking if I had to resort to the magical potions one
can get hold of here.'
'You haven't answered my question.' Partly he had, she supposed, but
his last few words seemed to negate what could- have been a denial. It
was almost as if he had uttered them solely to confuse her. The
magical potions one can get hold of here. He seemed to be making
sure that she would know for certain that a love potion could be easily
obtained for any who might want to use it.
'Your confusion increases all the time, doesn't it?' He looked with
amusement into her clouded eyes. 'You can't make up your mind
whether your desires are natural or artificial.' A low laugh escaped
him as she coloured. 'Does it matter? Happiness will be the result
either way.'
'You're playing with me...Two great tears escaped and rolled down
her cheeks. 'You're very sure of yourself, too.'
'And sure of you ... my wife. My little runaway bride who's now
going to reap what she's sown. I intend to take what's my right,
Renny --'
'I'm engaged to Gordon!'
'Good lord! Where did words like that spring from!'
'I've just remembered --' She stopped, turning her head away, but it
was brought round again with a commanding touch of his fingers
beneath her chin.
'Just remembered, eh? Well, you can forget him again, my love.' His
tawny eyes searched her face, and - then glimmered with a sort of
satisfied humour. Renny moved her head again, lowering it because
she hated the idea of him reading her expression, and because she was
ashamed that Gordon meant absolutely nothing to her at this moment
in time. Her senses were ruling her, the physical attractions of her
husband were paramount, erasing every other emotion except
desire desire strong and unconquerable. His finesse was too
overpowering, his mastery something beyond her strength to combat.
She knew an overwhelming wave of despair as the words were wrung
from her, 'Sanity ... where has it gone?'
Her husband's face came close, his arms encircling her in an embrace
that was savagely crushing. She kept her head averted for a moment,
but Carl caught at her hair and she found her head being held back.
She clung to him suddenly as his mouth found hers, forcing her lips
apart. Was every atom of resistance gone? Her lips responded and
when he lifted her and carried her from one room to the next she lay
in his arms, content to be there. But once in the bedroom, with the
stark picture of what was about to happen becoming focused in her
imagination, Renny began to struggle violently and her husband put
her on her feet.
'What's wrong now?' he began, when she interrupted him, saying
vehemently that she wanted to return to her hotel. 'Return?' Carl
shook his head and laughed. Then without warning he took hold of
both her hands, imprisoning them in a painful grip. His other hand
reached to her back and within seconds she felt the sliding of her zip
fastener as it was brought from her neck to her waist, and lower. He
unfastened the diamante studs with two quick twists and the lovely
gown dropped to the floor. Renny looked down at it, fascinated for a
second before, crimson with embarrassment, she would have stooped
to take it up again. But Carl was before her; she was made to step out
of it, and as she did so she began to struggle again, her hands having
been freed as Carl picked up the dress and flung it across the bedroom
on to a couch. He seemed amused by her struggles, and let her
continue for a while, holding her easily, his hands almost spanning
her waist. Tears fell, and little sobs escaped her as she realised how
puny her strength was against that of her husband.
At last he picked her up, and her struggles ceased. Breathing heavily,
she rested her head against his shoulder, vitally conscious of his body
close to hers, of his hands on her naked flesh, and of the rhythm in his
steps as he carried her to the huge bed with its flaring Chinese
coverlet and the--black and gold .pillow that went the full length of
the latticed bamboo headboard. Carl laid her down, and stood
bending over her for a few seconds. She saw that nerve pulsating
again, was aware of his hands coming to caress her, of the Chinese
lantern-type bedlamp, of a clock chiming the hour... midnight --
'Sanity,' Carl murmured much later as he lay close to her in the
darkness, the flame of his passion dying slowly in unison with hers.
'Sanity, you say? Sanity, my love, is for tomorrow. Romance is for
tonight.'
Renny lay supine in his arms, her mind languidly receptive to the fact
that his desire would rise again, to envelop her in the conflagration of
his passion. Yes, she murmured, but to herself, sanity was for
tomorrow.
Tomorrow ... and sanity ... were so very far away...

CHAPTER FIVE
THE warm, comfortable decor of the wooden stalls, the natural brick
and the many and varied' sporting prints all combined to give The
Stables an air of familiarity; it was a typically English restaurant, one
of the six which made up the eating places from which one could
make his or her choice at the Mandarin Hotel.
Renny and Gordon were dining there, for a change from the Top of
the M and the Pine Court, which they both liked. Renny had not yet
dined in the Belvedere with her fiance, simply because of a memory
... that of her husband and herself dining there while Gordon was
away.
He was looking at her, as he had looked at her so often since he had
returned to the hotel just over a week ago. And when he spoke hi
words had a familiar ring even if their actual phrasing was new.
'There seems to be something troubling you, Renny. I know I must
appear to be harping on it, but --' He broke off, shaking his head.
'You're different, somehow, darling.'
She let her lashes come down to hide her expression, wondering what
he would say were she to tell him the truththat her conscience was
hell to live with, that she despised herself so much she could hardly
bear to look in a mirror. Sometimes her attitude would become
illogical, when viewed in the light of modern trends when it did not
matter who one slept with so long as one was careful and suffered no
disastrous after- effects. But she soon found herself right back to the
point of self-blame where guilt hung heavily upon her mind and a
confession was poised on her lips. How would Gordon take such a
confession? Better not tomake one, and in that way avoid trouble. He
might leave her, or tell her to go. She had her job to think of too. If
Gordon decided to cast her off as his fiancee then obviously he would
cast her off altogether. Her job was good, very good, and it was well
paid in addition to all the perks that came with it, perks such as this
trip to Singapore, and others which, though nothing like this one, had
been interesting and profitable in that they had entailed travel and full
expenses.
Was she in love with Gordon, though? Carl had been doubtfulto
say the least. In fact, he had almost told her that she was making a
mistake in marrying him.
'Renny...'
She glanced across at Gordon as he spoke.
'Yes?'
'You're not very good company. And you haven't answered my
question. Is something troubling you?'
'No; I suppose I'm just tired.'
'Tired? You haven't even started at the office yet.'
'No, but we've been out a lot, sightseeing, haven't we?' Gordon had
been given a week off on his return and he and Renny had been out
every day, taking trips or else walking round the city, finding their
way about. Renny had not mentioned one word about having been out
with Carl, or having dined with him. She had not set eyes on him
since leaving his penthouse the following morning. He had wanted to
walk to her hotel with her, but she had refused his company, wanting
only to be alone, for she could not think how she was going to face
Gordon and appear casual when in reality she was weighed down
with guilt and shame.
'I admit we've been out a lot, but it isn't as if the weather's over hot, is
it?'
'No,' she sighed, aware that the food was like sawdust in her
mouthnot at all like the food she had eaten with Carl...
'Perhaps you should see a doctor,' suggested Gordon,
and she frowned.
'I certainly don't need a doctor,' she said, hoping her voice was not as
sharp as she thought it was.
'Would you like to go to bed early?'
She nodded, thankful for the suggestion. 'Yes, I would, Gordon, if
you don't mind.' But suddenly she felt mean and selfish and took back
her words. 'No, I don't really want to go to bed. Let's dance after
we've eaten, shall we?'
Gordon brightened immediately, making Renny feel worse than ever.
'That'll be nice. Where shall we go?' Renny had heard of the Supper
Club, on top of the Hotel Malaysia, where there was dancing and a
cabaret. She told Gordon about it, explaining that she had had it
described to her by a Chinese girl who had sat at her table in the
Chatterbox, another of the Mandarin's eating places, this time where a
snack could be had if a full meal was not required.
'Shall we try it?' Her voice was light and gay, but little did Gordon
know what a strain it was for Renny to put on this front. For all the
time her mind was on that night she had spent with Carl. Yes, he was
her husband, but nevertheless she was unable to deceive herself into
thinking she had not been unfaithful to her fianc.
'Yes,' he answered obligingly, 'we'll try itcertainly.'
The decision turned out to be an unwise one, to say the least, as no
sooner had they entered the Supper Club than Renny's eyes caught
the couple sitting in a secluded corner, beneath a snowflake
chandelier which Seemed to form a halo for the breathtaking
loveliness of the slant-eyed girl sitting oipposite to Carl. He was
superbly dressed in pearl-grey linen with matching shirt and a
contrasting tie of olive-green silk from Thailand, embroidered like
the one he had worn before, but this time the design war far more
intricate. He saw Renny at once, and she nodded her head, painfully
aware of her rising colour, and of the lift of her husband's mouth at
one corner as a sardonic smile touched it, erasing much of its
austerity.
'Do you know that man?' Gordon's voice was sharp and Renny
answered hastily.
'It's my husbanderCarl.'
The girl had seen Renny now and the smile had faded from her eyes.
'Carlwith the Chinese girl you mentioned? Masie, I think you said?'
'Yes. Ershall we join them?'
Carl had already risen and was signalling to one of the white-coated
waiters. The man called to a boy, who immediately brought two
chairs.
'It appears we shall have to.' Gordon sounded far from pleased, but he
went with Renny as she began to make her way over to Carl's table.
'Carl wants to meet you,' murmured Renny, then wished she hadn't,
because her fiance returned sharply,
'Why?'
'Because...' Renny allowed her voice to fade away, realising she had
no answer to a question like that. She could hardly tell Gordon that
her husband, not at all satisfied that she had made the right choice,
had demanded to see the man she intended to marry.
Carl was standing waiting for them to join him and Masie. Renny
introduced them all and they sat down. Carl Ordered drinks. Renny
noticed his eyes never left Gordon's face; she saw that Gordon was
not at all pleased with this most searching scrutiny to which he was
being subjected.
The drinks arrived, their appearance providing a break in the rather
stiff conversation which had been going on between the two men and
Renny. The Chinese girl had merely listened, her lovely almond eyes
moving all the time from Renny to Gordon, then back to Renny and
on to Carl. She seemed to be deep in thought and Renny wondered if
she were beginning to suspect that Renny and Carl were much more
than acquaintances.
'You're here for a year, Renny tells me?' Carl spoke a moment after
the waiter had left the table. He was holding his glass, studying the
tracery of lemon oil on the marbled surface of his drink.
'Yes, about a year.'
'We must get acquainted. I'd like you to come to dinner one evening.'
He paused a moment, considering. 'How about Friday?'
'I don't know,' began Gordon, when Renny interrupted to say that she
and Gordon had something arranged for that evening. It was a lie, and
the. moment it was uttered she knew she had made a mistake, for not
only did Gordon give a start and cast her an enquiring glance, but
Carl's lip curled and his gaze was admonishing. A fragment of
memory brought back to Renny the way he had been with her so long
ago, when she was eighteen. His manner with her even then had been
one of censure if she should happen to do or say anything to
displease" him. She remembered how she had felt so very young, and
had treated Carl with the greatest respect, just as if he had been her
father, or someone similar who had authority over her. She coloured
under his admonishing eye and lowered her lashes. Gordon, not too
happy because of the way Renny had been lately, was looking moody
and morose, but his puzzlement was still there as well. Renny said,
making her voice sound flippant,
'I thought we'd decided to go on the boat trip for dinner and
dancingyou know, the Singapore Lady.'
She was giving-him a hint, but Carl spoke before he caught on.
'Have you booked already?'
Renny looked across at him, and her eyes fell before his.
'No,' she replied, 'we haven't.'
'I didn't think you had.' The satirical tone brought Gordon's attention
to him. 'Well then, you can take the trip another time. I shall expect
you both at the Zephyr around half-past seven on Friday.'
'Thank you,' murmured Renny, deciding she had never felt mare
uncomfortable in her life. But then, she thought, she had never been
in the company of her husband and her fiance at one and the same
time!
'We're much obliged to you,' was Gordon's stiff response.
'I'll ask two more friends,' decided Carl. 'They're English. They live
and work here, in Singapore.'
'Both men?' enquired Gordon briefly.
Carl shook his head.
'Jean and Maurice Brownethey're brother and sister.' Carl looked at
Renny. 'Care to dance?' he invited, his eye catching the swift turn of
Gordon's head in a gesture of anger. 'You don't mind?' suavely from
Carl, and, much more softly so that Masie would not catch the words,
'After all, Renny is my wife.'
And before either Gordon or Renny had time to say anything Carl had
taken her by the hand and she was drawn towards the dance floor.
'You've no right to speak like that to Gordon!' snapped Renny. 'He
doesn't want to be reminded that I have a husband.'
'He can hardly forget you have one,' returned Carl in some
amusement. 'I expect that; if you had been single, you'd have married
before coming over to Singapore?'
'Yes, of course we would.' Renny, dancing close to her husband, was
quivering inwardly. There was no denying that he did something to
her, that his magnetic personality affected her in a way she would
never have believed possible.
'In that case, my dear, it's a good thing you're married. I'm optimistic
that you'll come to your senses and realise that this Gordon is not for
you.'
So calmly he uttered those words! Renny leant away to dart him a
glowering look.
'I intend to marry Gordon, no matter what you think about our not
being suited!'
'Have you told him that you slept with your husband while he was
away on his job?'
She swallowed hard, glancing down in order to escape the sardonic
laughter that she knew would be there in his eyes.
'That,' she quivered, 'is a question to be ignored 1'
'You're afraid to tell him?' Carl laughed softly as he regarded the top
of his wife's head. 'Hiding your activities from him already,
eh?even before you're married --'
'Don't be absurd! That isn't something one tells one's fianc about!
What would you do, if the positions were reversed and I'derslept
withwith Gordon?'
'I'd take a horsewhip to you,' was Carl's quiet rejoinder.
'Oh! You --'
'And I'd make such a damned good job of it that you'd not sit down for
a month.' The voice was still quiet, but there was such a sinister
quality about it that Renny actually shivered in his hold. 'Yes,' went
on Carl as he noticed this, 'I'd make you smart, my girl
:
''Shut up!'
she broke in wrathfully. 'Who are you to talk to me like that?'
'I'm your husband, Renny, a fact which seems to escape you from
time to time.'
'I've never regarded you as my husband 1'
'Then you're a fool,' said Carl, bringing her very close to him in order
to avoid collision with another couple. 'I am very much your husband,
especially after the other night. You do realise, don't you, that you
might be carrying my child?'
'Oh, Godno!' Why hadn't the thought occurred to her before this?
Why had she needed a reminder, given in this commonplace manner,
just as if it was only to be expected that she would be having his
child? 'No ...!' She froze inside at the idea of having to tell Gordon
that she could not marry him, because she was expecting Carl's child.
'You hate the idea?' Carl looked down into her face and she wondered
if he would gloat over it if she did happen to be pregnant.
'Naturally I hate the idea of having your child!' she retorted. 'It would
ruin all my plans.'
'It would certainly put paid to your engagement,' rejoined her
husband thoughtfully. He led her from the floor on to a balcony. She
knew she ought to object, to make him take her back to the table, but
once again his personality was forceful enough to ascend over her
own. 'Yes,' he murmured as he looked down into her face, 'it would
bring this absurd engagement to an end ...'
Renny's eyes flashed to his, her heart thudding with unnatural
intensity as a strange and inexplicable fear swept through her. Yes,
she was afraid of the man who was her husband ... afraid without
quite knowing why. She said quiveringly,
'The divorce, Carl. You will agree to it, won't you?'
'I don't think I will,' he answered. 'I feel, Renny, that you and I ought
to give our marriage a trial.'
'A --' Renny jerked and stared, open-mouthed. 'You can't be serious! *
'I am very serious,' he returned softly. 'I enjoyed our love-making the
other night and would like to repeat it.' He smiled faintly at her
heightened colour. 'I believe you would not be averse to a repetition,
my dear --'
'Don't be ridiculous! I'm engaged to Gordon. I love him!' Renny's
eyes were wide and fiercely bright."I love him, so how can I stay with
youOh, the whole idea's so stupid it isn't worth discussing! Take
me back to Gordonat once!'
'You love him?' Carl's voice was maddeningly sceptical and amused.
'Tell me, Renny, haven't you already asked yourself if you really do
love this man?'
'I hate you!' was all she returned to that.
'Because of my perception? Yes, you've answered me, haven't you?
You have asked yourself if you love him ... and you couldn't find an
honest answer.'
'You're so cleverand confident!'
'I'm endowed with a fair degree of common-sense, Renny. If you'd
really loved Gordon then nothing just nothing would have let you
betray him the way you did the other night. Love, my dear, is far
stronger than that.'
She avoided his shrewd gaze as she said, 'So you do know something
about love, then, cynical as you are?'
'I was in love once, remember.'
'With that girl who let you down.' Renny nodded automatically,
wondering vaguely why they were talking like this. 'You see her
sometimes, you said?'
'I do, and we have pleasant evenings together.'
'And nights?' The words escaped without her having time to stop
them and she coloured and once again avoided her husband's eyes.
'No, not nights. I spend my nightsor some of themwith Masie.
She's the kind of girl who can give a man most of what he wants, and
she understands that marriage will never be one of the rewards of
herergenerosity.'
'How delicately put,' said Renny with cold sarcasm. 'Have you had
many like her?'
'A few,' was Carl's prompt and frank reply. 'They come and go,
providing variety to life.'
Renny frowned, conscious of a hurt inside her.
'It's an aimless existence, Carl.'
'I don't intend to live a continent life simply because I'm married but
deserted,' he returned dryly.
'I didn't mean that,' she murmured, colouring slightly at what he had
said. 'Don't you ever want to settle downget married properly, I
mean, and have a family?'
'I am married properly,' he reminded her, and she frowned then and
moved impatiently.
'We're not really married, Carl. And no matter what you say, you're
no happier at being tied than I am. Let's act sensibly and agree to a
quick divorce. It can be over and done with in a few months if you
don't defend it. If you do I can get it anyway, though it will take
longer.'
'We've already been into that. I agree that an amicable agreement will
mean that we shall both have our freedom in a short while, but I
haven't bothered about my freedom up till now and I don't care if I
remain married to you for the rest of my life.'
Renny again moved impatiently.
'It isn't reasonable,' she flashed. 'You don't love me and I don't love
you, so where's the sense in your objecting to a speedy divorce?' Carl
made no answer and after a space Renny went on, 'You say you don't
care if you remain married to me for the rest of your life. That's only
because, at present, you're not contemplating marriage to anyone
else. But surely it's struck you that one dayand it could be
tomorrow you'll meet someone you can love?' Renny's voice had
sunk to a low pitch, but there was a sweetness about it that arrested
Carl's whole attention. She was sad for him and it was plain to see.
The present, and the formidable and arrogant man that was her
husband, faded out, erased by the vision of the pastwhen she was
eighteen and he twenty-three. She had been crucified by grief; he had
been unhappy and disillusioned. Yet he could take pity on her, a
stranger who, he believed, had tried to commit suicide. He had taken
her into his lovely home, had tended her and treated her with infinite
kindness and compassion. And then he had suggested marriage,
feeling that it would be good for them both to have someone to think
about so that their minds would be taken off their respective tragedies
and heartaches.
Renny, lost in the past as she was, had no idea how beautiful she was
in her sadness, how all her thoughts were reflected in her face, her
pity revealed in the softness of her eyes and the sensitive quivering of
her mouth. Carl, watching her intently through half-closed eyes,
seemed to swallow something hard in his throat. She wondered if he,
like herself, was remembering the past, and their first meeting. No,
perhaps he was thinking of their last moments together, and of the
way she had run out on him, leaving him sitting there, at the table
where they had just eaten their wedding dinner. A brief note she had
left him, with the receptionist at the desk of the hotel ... a note
informing him that she had heard that her fianc was alive, and was
going to him:'Carl,' she whispered after a long while, 'Carl..
'Yes?'
'I intended, when I came here, to say I was sorry .. Her voice trailed,
the words choked by the emotion that gripped her. 'I offer you no
excuse, Carl, only that of my youth and my impetuosity. I didn't stop
to think when I heard that Paul was alive. The relief was so greatI
wanted only to be with him ...' Again she stopped, this time because
she could find no words to convey, what she really wanted to
conveythat she was filled with guilt and shame, that she would give
ten years of her life to go back, so that she could undo the hurt that
had resulted in him becoming the harsh and cynical man he was
today.
'You've regretted your hasty act?'
'Of course. I'm older now and can see how awful it was to treat you
like that --' Renny spread her hands in a little helpless gesture. 'It isn't
profitable, is it, to go back into the past? We're here now, and eight
years older. We want our freedom --'
'You want your freedom,' she interrupted, and his voice was harsh
suddenly, and the tawny eyes glintingly coldlike chipped ice. 'I'm
unwilling to make it easy for you to make a blunderNo, don't
interrupt me 1' he added as she opened her mouth to speak. His voice
was no longer harsh, but stern instead, and authoritatively curt. 'You
would be making a blunder if you married that man! He's not for
younot in any way at all.'
'How do you know that?' said Renny impatiently. 'You're no judge of
what my actions should be regarding my future. I've known Gordon a
long time, remember, and we've always got along well together.'
'Has he ever made love to you?'
'Nooh, I wish you weren't so outspoken, Carl!'
'I make you blush?' His eyes took on an amused expression and his
fine lips curved in the semblance of a smile. 'You're very refreshing,
Renny. And it's to your credit that you're embarrassed at plain
speakingthough plain speaking is very necessary, I'm afraid. So he
hasn't made love to you. How long have you been engaged?'
'We decided to marry a short while before we came out here.'
'So it's not long?' He seemed surprised, she thought. 'Have you ever
tried to imagine what it would be like to have him make love to you?'
She shook her head, turning away. The street below was ablaze with
colour and light and movement. So many different peoples and
cultures, so much activity and so much diversity. It was bewildering
at night, when the Singaporeans came out to crowd the streets and
mingle with all the other people bent on an evening's pleasure. The
young ones were in modern clothes, smart and sophisticated, while
their mothers and grandmothers sat in dim-lit alleys and sipped tea
from glasses while slapping mah-jongg tiles on the tables.
'Renny...'
Carl's voice brought her back from the scene below and she turned
her head.
'Yes?'
'How about giving my suggestion some thought?'
'Your suggestion?' She stared into his dark face, puzzled.
'That we give our marriage a trial.'
She thought of the Chinese girl and said, 'Masiewhat about her?'
'She's always known that our relationship wasn't permanent. She'll
soon find someone else.' He looked at Renny. 'Well, are you going to
give our marriage a
v
trial?'
She shook her head.
'I can't believe you're serious,' she said. 'But even if I could believe it I
wouldn't entertain the idea, not for one moment. I love Gordon and I
intend to marry him.'
'You don't love him!'
'I do!'
'You're trying to deceive yourself, and not succeeding very well at
all.'
'Shall we go back?' she said with a hint of asperity. 'Both Gordon and
Masie will be wondering where we've got to.'
Carl, raising no objection, came to her side and together they returned
to the dance hall. Carl took Renny in his arms and they danced for a
few moments before returning to the table.
'Thank you, Renny, that was most enjoyable.' Carl was urbane, full of
self-confidence. He turned to Masie and she rose to slip into his arms.
'Where the devil did you get to?' demanded Gordon as soon as the two
had gone out of earshot.
Renny's eyes were following them as they danced, two tall and stately
people, both handsome, both confident and self-assured. Gordon was
speaking again, irritably asking her to answer his question.
'We went on to the balcony to talk,' she said.
'About what?'
'The divorce.' It was true, she told herself. All she had done was to
omit most of what had been discussed.
'The divorce?' Gordon's anger dissolved swiftly. 'He's agreeable to let
it go through without any fuss?'
Renny gave a small sigh and shook her head. She was dwelling on her
husband's assertion that she was not in love with Gordon.
'No, he says he doesn't care if he remains married to me for the rest of
his life.'
'He' Gordon stared at her disbelievingly. 'What did you say?'
'You heard aright, Gordon. He seems set against a divorce.'
'But why, for heaven's sake?'
She paused, unable to find an answer other than the truthful one that
Carl did not think she and Gordon were suited.
'Shall we dance?' she asked. 'I feel depressed and it'll help to liven me
up a bit.'
He looked at her suspiciously.
'Are you holding something back?' he wanted to know.
She shook her head.
'What would I be holding back?'
'I'm asking you!'
'I want to dance,' she said petulantly. 'That's what we came here for.'
He got up, but the dance was not a very happy interlude for either of
them. They never opened their mouths and it was a relief when they
came back to thg table to join Carl And Masie who were sitting there,
glasses in their hands.
'Will you dance with Masie?' whispered Renny, feeling sure Gordon
would not do so without prompting. 'It'll look bad if you don't.'
He rose a short while later and danced with the Chinese girl. Renny
knew she would feel awkward with Carl, but she hoped he would
engage her in light, casual conversation and not return to a more
intimate subject.
'You and Gordon didn't seem too happy just now/ was Carl's first
remark. 'Had a tiff or something?'
Renny sent him a sparkling glance.
'He's annoyed at your keeping me out on the balcony too long!''Oh ...
I didn't see him speaking to you at all, as a patter of factnor did you
speak to him.'
She drew a deep breath.
'We danced in silence, yes. But he'd already asked me where the
devI mean, where I'd been for so long.'
'He asked you where the devil you'd-been, did he? Doesn't he trust
you?'
'Oh, for heaven's sake stop asking questions like that! You yourself
would have been annoyed if another man had taken your fiancee off
the dance floor and disappeared for ten minutes or so!'
'I, my child, would very soon have gone after them.' So soft the tone,
but the hidden threat in it sent a shiver rippling along Renny's spine
even before her husband added, 'And if I'd found you on the balcony
I'd have given him a bruise or two on the face and you even more on
your backside.'
Renny's face flooded with colour and she looked down, escaping
from the half-glinting, half-amused expression that had entered her
husband's eyes.
'Did he ask what we'd been talking about?' enquired Carl, breaking
the silence at length.
'Yes, of course he did.'
'And did you tell him? I'll bet you didn't,' he added with a low laugh,
answering his own question.
'I said we'd talked about the divorce.'
Carl lifted an eyebrow admonishingly. prevaricating, eh? Now if you
tried that with me, my girl, I'd know in a minute.'
'You're so clever, though, aren't you?' she retorted sarcastically. And,
when he merely laughed again, she went on to say, 'I told Gordon that
you don't care if you remain married to me for the rest of your life.'
'And how did he take that, might I ask?'
'He wanted the reason for the attitude you were taking, naturally.'
'And...?'
She glared at him across the table.
'I didn't tell him! I could scarcely say that you'd expressed doubts
about our being suited to one another, could I?'
'I don't know that there was anything to stop you,' answered Carl with
a careless shrug of his shoulders.
Renny made a little smothered exclamation of impatience.
'You don't want a quarrel on your hands, do you?' she flashed.
'With Gordon? I'd welcome it. For then I'd have an excuse for saying
all I want to say.'
Renny's anger subsided; she looked appealingly at her husband and
said, 'Don't break up my life, Carl. My future's with Gordon. I don't
want our engagement broken.'
Her husband looked at her sternly for a long moment without
speaking.
'You don't know what you do want, Renny,' he chided. 'I've said that
Gordon's not for you. He could never make you happy, either
mentally or physically most certainly not physically,' he
emphasised, unconcerned that he was embarrassing her. 'You're a
passionate girl, Renny, as I'm a passionate man. Neither of us would
ever be satisfied with anything less than total fulfilment in our
lovemaking. You and I give each other that --'
'Be quiet! I don't want reminding of what I've done! I've been
unfaithful to Gordon, and in consequence I act strangely with him. It's
no wonder he's troubled, and asks me if I'm holding anything back!'
'If he'd any perception he'd know damned well you're holding
something back,' said Carl derisively.
"The man's blind, as well as being a fool!'
'You shan't say things like that about him!' Points of flint sparkled in
Renny's eyes, and her small fists were clenched. 'He'she's a good
man, and kind! It's a cruel, wicked thing I'm doing to him, because if
he ever finds out he's going to be so hurt he'll never get over it!'
'Rubbish! He'd get over it in a month!'
'You would, perhaps, because you're hard and unfeeling!' She looked
at him, taking in the harsh features and wondering how they could
still be handsome. The mouth was thin, and yet when he smiled ... it
was an attraction that caused her heart to flutter. His tawny eyes were
metal-hard for most of the time, yet when they softened..,. Renny
glanced away, afraid of her own expression and what her husband
would make of it. His powerful effect on her senses could not be
denied. She suddenly began to wonder how she would feel were she
to be told that she would never see him again after tonight. A dryness
caught at her throat; she recalled with startling clarity the night he had
taken her, made violent love to herforcing her to his will, showing
her who was master. She had responded, giving her all. She fiercely
blamed him the following morning, accused him of giving her a love
potion, but he had laughed and stated triumphantly that her surrender
had come from within herself.
'I would never have resorted to that, my love. A man would be a poor
specimen if he had to.'
Renny found herself believing him, recalling how, at the very
beginning, she had felt no revulsion at the idea of marriage to him. As
she had told Clare, she found him inordinately attractive and could
have lived with him as his wife. Yes, as Carl had so confidently
asserted, her surrender "had come from within herself. The admission
led quite naturally to another: she had all the desires which her
husband had so arrogantly attributed to her. There was no denying
that she had wanted him, yearnedno, cravedfor his body to
possess hers. And her surrender had proved to be her own fulfilment.
Carl was speaking again, breaking into her reflections and she looked
at him, the sensuous pleasure evoked by memory still with her as she
listened to some light remark he was making about the dance music.
He had changed the subject and she was glad. It gave her time to
collect herself before the others returned to the table.
And so she had a smile for Gordon as he approached. Masie's smile
was for Carl, who responded. Renny felt rather sorry for her,
convinced that she was in love with the man who would one day cast
her off in favour of someone else who had caught his fancy. The girl
was quiet, thoughtful, with that enigmatic look seen so often on the
faces of the Chinese. She had a philosophical quality about her which,
decided Renny, would carry her through lifeif not completely
unscathed, then without too much hurt.
Gordon did not return Renny's smile. His features were taut and she
felt sure he would have broached the question of the divorce if Masie
had not been present. As it was, the conversation flowed casually for
the next few minutes until Carl got up to dance with Masie. His next
dance was with Renny, and then she and Gordon left.
'You seem to be in a temper.' Renny could not help voicing these
words when after a long silence she and Gordon entered the Mandarin
Square.
'That,' he returned between his teeth, 'is. an understatement! Why
does he feel he must remind me that you're his wife? I'm damned sure
there's something I don't understand 1 His manner with you was too
fam-iliar for my liking!' He stopped by the .crystal waterfall and
glowered at her. 'I'm going to tackle him about the divorce at the very
first opportunity! You might not be able to get any satisfaction out of
him but, by God, I shall!'

CHAPTER SIX
THE restaurant was on the top floor of the Zephyr, but Carl had
arranged for his guests to have their aperitifs in his penthouse, on the
balcony which held such profound memories for Renny. It was here
that he had first kissed her, possessively and with a passion that had
proved to be the prelude to her final surrender. From here he had
carried her into the sitting-room ,.. She shook off the picture that
would have forced itself into her mind, and concentrated instead on
the girla pretty, dark-haired girl of about twenty-five years of
agewho was chatting unselfconsciously to Carl, her big grave eyes
never leaving his handsome face. Was she in love with him? Renny
wondered, and fell to musing on her reaction had Carl introduced her
as his wife and not as Miss Renny Colbert. As it was, Jean Browne
believed Carl to be single, and although she knew all about Masie, it
did seem that she 'had her eye on Carl', as Gordon was to remark later,
when he and Renny were on their way back to the Mandarin.
Maurice was about five years older than his sister and he worked in a
travel agency in Penang Road, while Jean worked in a gift shop in the
Tanglin Centre on Tanglin Road. Maurice, though describing himself
as a 'bachelor born', had recently acquired a girl-friend, a beautiful
Malaysian girl introduced to him by Masie. Jean was later to confide
to Renny that she hoped her brother was settled with this girl, as she
was both charming and well-bred.
"We're going to Pulau Tioman,' Renny heard Jean say. 'It sounds
fabulous from the brochuresa lovely tropical island in the South
China Sea --' She broke off, laughing. 'Here am I, telling you! There
isn't anywhere much around this part of the world that you don't
know, is there? Well,' continued Jean without giving Carl time to
answer, 'as you're aware, Maurice gets a big reduction for all
holidays, working at the travel agency, so we're having a fortnight on
Pulau Tioman.'
'It should be different, if nothing else.'
'Yes, indeed! There isn't anything therenot in the way of
entertainment, that is. There's only the one hotel, which is right on the
beach,.-among the palms. I'm really looking forward to getting right
away from crowds and the hurry and bustle of Singapore.'
'It's the island where much of South Pacific was filmed, I believe,' put
in Gordon. 'I wouldn't mind going there myself.' He spoke affably
enough, but Renny was vitally aware of the undercurrent of animosity
that marked his attitude towards her husband. She'd had some
difficulty in persuading him to come here this evening, as at first he
was quite determined to phone Carl and say that neither he nor Renny
could keep the dinner date.
'It's the island of the real escapist,' said Maurice, then added with a
trace of humour, 'Or honeymooners.'
Carl cast a sardonic glance in Renny's direction, a glance that did not
go unnoticed by Gordon.
'Honeymooners need nothing but scenery, so Maurice implies.'
'Well, I agree,' from Jean. 'The quietness and the complete seclusion
would appeal enormously to me if I were on my honeymoon.'
Her eyes went to Carl; Renny wondered if he noticed how much
attention the girl gave to him. He seemed a trifle bored, she thought,
but later, at the dinner table, he was all affability, the perfect host to
his guests and the appreciative boss to those who served him.
The restaurant was one of five. It was called Le Chalet and
specialised in Swiss food. Its decor was typically Alpine, its
numerous dishes authentically Swiss. Carl had chosen a fondue and
each guest had a plate of thin slices of steak and a long skewer on
which to roll these pieces of meat. The stock in the fondue pan
became richer as .the meat was being cooked in it and when finally
the last of the meat was eaten a waiter arrived, took off the pan,
poured its contents into five bowls and into each he broke an egg.
This cooked in the boiling stock and was eaten with fresh croutons
brought to the table wrapped in a white linen napkin.
The sweet was a delicious ice-cream concoction top ped by walnuts
and whipped cream. Coffee followed, and liqueurs. Carl then
suggested they go back to his apartment for more drinks. It was then
that Renny and Jean got into conversation, having taken possession of
a small sofa by one of the windows. The three men began to converse,
so it was natural that the two girls should do the same. Renny found
herself being given information about her husband by the girl who
obviously knew him well.
'He's had one or two girls,' said Jean casually, her glance straying to
him. 'But he's never been serious with any of them. I often wonder if
there's some reason why he's so offhand about marriage, so cynical
regarding love.'
'Have you known him long?' asked Renny, leaning forward to take
her glass from the bamboo table in front of her.
'Three years. Maurice was sent here by the agency he worked for in
England, and as we have no one elsewe lived together in England,
in the house ourparents left usI decided to come out here with him.
I got the job right away, which was lucky. Then Maurice and I joined
a few recreational things, and through an acquaintance we met Carl.
He seemed to take to us and he often invites us to dine with him,
especially if he invites others, as he did tonight.' Jean paused and
looked at Renny. 'Have you known him long?' she asked at last.
'A few yearserbut not very well. In fact, our acquaintanceship in
England was very brief indeed.'
'Then you ran into him here?'
'It was something like that.' Renny's voice was noncommittal and
toned to discourage any further questions about Carl and herself. Jean
tactfully took the hint and went on to say,
'He's awfully rich, you know. Owns several hotels and has financial
interests in a few others. I often wonder if eventually he'll leave here
and settle somewhere else.' Her voice went flat all at once. 'He's
terrifically handsome, don't you think?'
'Yes, he is.' A slight pause and then, 'But he seems a hard man and
self-sufficient.'
'None of us is really self-sufficient, Renny. We all need someone.
Carl's a lonely man, though he'd be the last to admit it. I feel, quite
often, that he has some sadnessNo, perhaps that's not what I want
to say. I feel he's been bitterly disillusioned at some time in his life.'
'What makes you think that?' said Renny, startled by Jean's
perceptiveness regarding Carl.
'His general attitude towards women. He has little time for them,
really, although, as I've said, he's had one or two girls. But they've all
been like Masienot the Find a man like Carl would ever marry.'
'You think he's been disillusioned ...' Renny murmured the words
thoughtfully, more to herself than to Jean. She hated to think of Carl
being lonely, but she felt sure that Jean was correct in her assumption
that he was. As for his disillusionmentwell, he'd certainly been
well and truly disillusioned, not merely by one woman but by three.
'Yes, I'm sure he's been disillusioned.' Jean stopped a moment before
adding, 'There's a girl who comes over periodically, Rona Gillett,
whom he takes around quite a lot. I have a suspicion that she and Carl
are very old friendsthat they were once a lot more than friends.'
Renny said, her glance moving to Carl, who was absorbed in
something being said by Maurice,
'You think they might havehave beenengaged?'
'Yes ... Well, if not engaged, then nearly so. She's divorced, so she
must have married someone else.' Another pause ensued as Jean
became thoughtful. 'Of course, she might not have been the one who
let him down, but I feel sure some woman did.' Jean paused
reflectively. 'If she is tlje one who let him down then he must have
forgiven herwhich is something I would never attribute to Carla
forgiving nature, I mean. Rather would I expect him to devise some
way of being revenged on anyone who'd done him an injury.'
Revenged ... Renny thought of the injury she herself had inflicted on
him, deserting him like that six hours after their marriage. Was it
possible that he meant to be revenged on her? And what about Rona?
It had already occurred to Renny that his old flame was now in love
with him, which was a feasible idea sinceas Carl had saidshe
wanted to 'pick up again, all nice and cosy and uncomplicated.' And if
Rona was in love with Carl, |.hen obviously she had hopes of
marrying him one day, hopes born of-his interest in her. But was Carl
playing with herleading her on, making her fall deeper in love with
him so that, eventually, he could throw her over as she had thrown
him over all those years ago? It was a diabolical plan, but a probable
one for all that.
Jean was speaking again, changing the subject as she asked Renny
about her job as secretary to Gordon.
'We arrived some minutes before you, as you know, and Carl was
telling us that you were Gordon's secretary.'
'Carl merely said I was secretary to Gordon?'
Jean blinked and nodded, puzzled.
'Yes. Isn't that correct?'
'Oh, yes, but Gordon and I are intending to get married as well --'
'You're engaged! How odd that Carl left that bit out. He knows very
well how romantic I am!'
'Perhaps he didn't think of it,' said Renny, half wishing now that she
had kept the information to herself for the time being.
'Perhaps,' agreed Jean, and grimaced as she added, 'He's so devoid of
romance himself that he's probably let the knowledge escape him
altogether.'
'He seems to have a great deal to dowith all these hotels, I mean.'
'And his interest in the new engineering factory at Jurong,' submitted
Jean. 'He goes there at least once a fortnight --'
'The new engineering factory?' Renny mentioned the name of it and
Jean nodded. 'But that's where Gordon had to go soon after we arrived
here--' Renny stopped, a deep suspicion already rooted in her mind.
Had Carl deliberately created that situation where she was on her
own, and Gordon forced to stay at the factory in Jurong? It seemed
very much like it! Yes, and Renny now recalled her impression that
Carl knew that Gordon would not be returning to the Mandarin yet
awhile! Carl had only to phone through to the manager and tell him to
keep Gordon there But no, this idea was carrying improbability too
far. Carl would never do a thing like that.
'But you don't work there, of course.'
Renny shook her head.
'No, we work here in the city.'
'It's a wonderful island. And it isn't all noise and traffic jams, Renny.
Away from the town you can find lovely country, and you. have the
jungle and the 'underbrush of the interior. There are many trips you
and Gordon can take when you've got the time.'
.'Yes, I want to explore the island while I'm here. I might never come
this way again.' Renny glanced at Carl, conscious of his attention
being caught by her words. The expression in his eyes was
unreadable, but she had the impression that his thoughts were far
from pleasant. A strange^ enigmatical man! His very remoteness
piqued her, and she recalled that she had been piqued before, wishing
she could make him aware of her as a woman. She had certainly
succeeded! The memory brought colour flowing to her cheeks and
she saw her husband's chiselled mouth broaden in a slow sardonic
smile that revealed his knowledge of the workings of her mind. Too
shrewd by far, she thought, feeling it would be most uncomfortable to
live with him, knowing that all one's secrets could so easily be
revealed to him.
'I think it's time we were moving.' Gordon spoke some short while
later, glancing at his watch as he did so. 'We have to be up fairly early
in the morning.'
'Are you liking your job?' enquired Maurice.
'Very much. We're conscious all the time of how fortunate we are in
being sent here.'
'I've been telling Renny that there's much to do when you have the
time.' Jean smiled at them in turn. 'For me, Singapore has more to
offer than any other place I know. The variety's so great, which is to
be expected, with so many cultures existing in such a small area.'
'Yes, there are many cultures,' agreed Carl. And then he said with a
hint of humour, "When I first came the Coca-Cola culture hadn't
arrived, and even now it hasn't got the grip that it has on so many
other places, but, sadly, it's going to catch up before very long.'
'That's life, and the tremendous changes that come aboutand
swiftly, tooso swiftly that it frightens you.' Maurice spoke with a
seriousness that surprised Renny, for up till, now she had found him a
little too prone to levity.
Gordon was rising, and Renny followed suit. They stood for a few
more minutes talking before saying their goodnights and being
accompanied by Carl to the lobby of the Zephyr.
'Have you enjoyed it?' asked Renny as they walked the short distance
to their hotel.
'I enjoyed the company of Jean and Maurice. And Carl knows how to
be the perfect host,' he added somewhat grudgingly. He sent Renny a
sidelong glance. 'I still think there's something I don't understand,' he
said.
'Youyou imagine things, Gordon.' Renny squirmed inwardly at her
own speciousness and for a second she felt like tossing all caution to
the winds and risking a full confession. Instead, she found herself
saying, with an edge of lightness to her voice, 'I was very taken with
Jean, weren't you?' She glanced around as she spoke, fascinated as
always by the medley of sights and sounds that pervaded the road
along which they were proceeding. Colour and life and noisethe
inevitable slamming of mah-jongg tiles, the nerve-scraping grind of
missing gears and the squeal of tyres. Laughter and chatter and the
cacophony of many tongues; the general din of traffic mingling with
all these other sounds, and with klaxons and pirate record stalls
blaring, and with the clatter of high heels on the pavement. Neon
signs flared and flashed, multicoloured and insistent; decorations
hanging from buildings, colourful dragons, and everywhere the
printed words, 'Kong Hee Fat Choy to all.' A Chinese New Year
greeting wishing everyone happiness and prosperity.
'Yes, Jean's rather nice. So is Maurice. They're our type. Perhaps we'll
make friends of them when we get our own place and we're able to
entertain.'
'Shall we have a housekeeperor someone?' Renny wanted to know,
and Gordon turned to her, smiling.
'As chaperone, you mean?'
'Well ... it wouldn't be quite the thing ...' Her voice trailed to silence.
She felt a hypocrite after what had happened between Carl and herself
on that fatal night when she had left herself open to his power.
'We shall have a servant living in,' was Gordon's. rather dry and cool
reassurance.
Renny wondered if they would have a flat somewhere in a block. She
felt that there could be nothing more soul-destroying than to live
communally like that, but on the other hand she could not see the firm
providing them with a house and garden.
A delicious aroma of cooking assailed her nostrils, but she couldn't
tell from where it came.
'Everyone seems concerned with food,' she commented, her mind
switching to the fantastic Orchard Road Car Park which, though an
ordinary car park during the day, was transformed with miraculous
speed into a gay carnival of eating once the last of the cars had
departed. Stall upon stall appeared, with cooks of many nationalities
getting busy over stoves which looked as if they had been in their
present positions for years instead of minutes. Crowds soon
congregated, to take possession of the tables, and then the chopsticks
began their incessant clicking as men and. women in bright clothing
bent their faces over plates containing mountainous proportions of
Chinese and numerous other Asian foods. For the next few hours the
transformation would endure, with gay chatter; laughter, lights and
noise continuing half-way, through the night.
'Yes,' Gordon was answering, 'everyone seems concerned with food.
It's their forte here, and I heard it said the other day in the office that
the loudest noise of the Singapore evening is the clicking of
chopsticks.'
Renriy laughed but made no comment. In any case, they had reached
their hotel and very soon she was in her room, feeling somehow flat
and drained ... and she knew that the feeling was by no means the
result of Gordon's coolness towards her, a coolness that came
periodically owing to Renny's own behaviour of lapsing into silence
as the sense of guiltcarried on a memoryrose to overwhelm her.

Something had again gone wrong with the plant at Jurong and
Gordon was called away.
'But surely I must come with you,' protested Renny after Gordon had
said,
'Take care of yourself, darling. I hope to be back in a few days.'
'I would have expected it,' he admitted in response to her remark, 'but
I've been told that it isn't necessary for you to accompany me. In fact,
the manager who telephoned me saidwhen I pointed out that I'd
rather have my secretary at handthat there would be nothing for
you to do, so he hoped I would go on my own.' A small pause
followed. Renny's thoughts quite naturally darted to Carl, and to her
previous suspicion that he might have engineered her fiance's absence
on that other occasionwell, at least the prolonging of his absence.
'Come to think of it,' mused Gordon with a sudden frown, 'I feel now
that I was practically ordered not to take you with me.'
Renny looked at him, noticing the thoughtful expression and the
frown that still knit his brows. Did he too have a suspicion --? No, that
was impossible, since he had no idea that Carl had any connection
with the firm for which he was working. Soon, though, he might find
out...
'What will you do with yourself?' he was asking when the time
arrived for him to take his departure.
'Oh, there'll be plenty to do,' she answered lightly. 'I'll take a few trips,
for one thing.'
'We were going to take the trip on the Singapore Lady,' he said, his
frown deepening.
'We have plenty of time for that,' Renny reminded him with a smile.
He was in one of his cool moods; she felt depressed, unsure of the
future, and of Gordon. A restlessness had been settling over her since
that night, she now realised, and secretly cursed her husband,
blaming him entirely for robbing her of her peace of mind.
'Yes, I suppose so. It'll be nice to dine and dance while cruising on the
river.' He was making an attempt to be his old self, so a tender look
entered his eyes. 'Goodbye, darling --' He bent to kiss her, even
though they were in the lobby. 'The car should be here any minute
now. I'll phone you each evening. You'll be in your room early, I
suppose?'
'Yeserwell, it might not be early every night, Gordon. If I take a
trip --'
'Take your trips during the day,' he broke in roughly. 'I'm not at all
happy at the thought of your being out at night.' He looked at her
sternly. 'Go to your room after dinner, Renny. I'll ring you around
half-past nine each evening.'
Before Rennie could say anything to that the car had arrived and the
porter was picking up Gordon's suitcase. She stood watching until the
car was out of sight as it entered the medley of traffic in the road.
Why had she been reluctant to agree to being in her room early? What
had been in her mind? Why ask herself a question like that? She knew
full well that the idea of dining and dancing with Carl had been the
only tangible one in her thoughts.
He rang her later that morning; she just happened to be in her room,
having done some shopping and returned to put it away before going
out again to do some sightseeing.
She tackled Carl at once, asking if he had had anything to do with
Gordon's being called away.
'I happen to know that you have interests in the firm,' she added
before he could speak. A small silence followed and then,
'I do have interests in the firm, yes, Renny. But the fault in the
machinery is a genuine one and it's very important that it's put right
speedily. Gordon is an expert at detecting the source of troubles of
this kind, so it's imperative that he goes immediately to the factory.'
'Why couldn't I have gone with him?' she demanded, trying to sound
angry but all the time aware that she was waiting breathlessly for the
moment when the words she wanted to hear came over the wires.
'Because your presence wasn't necessary,' answered Carl lightly.
Another silence ensued before he said, 'I rang to ask you to dine with
me this evening --'
'You expect me to accept, after whatwhat happened before?' A
feigned protest, but her pulses were racing madly.
'My dear Renny,' said Carl with some asperity, 'you know darned well
that you'll accept. I shall call for you at eight and we'll take the trip on
the Singapore Lady-'
'Oh, no! Gordon and I have plans to take that trip together!'
'There's nothing to stop you,' returned Carl smoothly. 'Be ready at
eight!' and with that imperative order he rang off.
Renny put the receiver down and sat on the edge of the bed. Where
was she going? What madness had taken possession of her that she
could feel like this yearning for her husband's company? She
suddenly admitted that she was disappointed he hadn't asked her to go
out with him this afternoonor even to have lunch with him.
For between now; and eight o'clock this evening was an eternity.
But seven o'clock came at last and it was time to dress. She had no
idea what to wear for such a trip as they were taking, so she decided
that a trouser suit would be a wise choice, especially the 'eveningy'
one she had bought from a London boutique as part of her wardrobe
for coming out to Singapore. It was of a colour termed Wild Moss by
the designer, and through the material ran threads of silver Lurex. The
top was loose-fitting and high-necked, but a belt brought in the waist
and slits up the front and back took away the apparent severity of the
neckline. She had a bag to matchsold along with the suitand
dainty sandals with open toes, revealing her perfectly-manicured
nails. Her hair had been shampooed and set by one of the Mandarin's
experts especially for this evening. It gleamed and swayed, a glorious
halo for her lovely features.
Critically she surveyed herself, owning that she had never looked
more attractive than she did this evening. She felt good, with that
glorious feeling she always had when she was clad from the skin up
in brand new clothes. A hint of Joy perfume, behind her ears and on
her wrists, a spray of the same perfume on her hair, and she was
ready. The cloak was in a sort of smoky green, an excellent colour to
go with her suit, but even as she slipped it on she realised she would
not need it, for the nights of Singapore were always warm and balmy.
Carl was in the lobby, engaged in conversation with the manager who
turned, smiling, as Renny approached, but then stopped, irresolute,
reluctant to intrude. Carl turned but his face remained unsmiling as
his eyes, fleetingly but yet all-absorbingly, swept from her face to her
toes and then back again to take in the honey-gold glory of her hair. A
very odd expression crept into his eyes ... and a sort of exquisite fear
thrilled right through Renny's body. She was playing with fire ... and
she was courting danger with an abandon that wa& lunacy itself.
Where was her caution, her innate sense of what was right and loyal?
How could she reject the conscience pangs that reminded her of
Gordon, and that he had a right to expect faithfulness from her? In
self-excuse she blamed the magic of this city of the Orient, blamed
Carl for his magnetism, his inordinate attractiveness as a man ... a
man who tempted with deliberate mastery and the arrogant optimism
of the conqueror.
'oft look very lovely, my dear.' Carl's voice was low and yet vibrant,
his gaze devouring. The manager had departed after greeting Renny
and wishing her and her escort a pleasant evening. And now she and
Carl were hi the Clipper Bar, having a quiet drink before going along
to the harbour to board the Lady. 'You'll need a cloak, I feel.' He
himself was in white linen, a casual suit superbly cut and made by one
of Singapore's numerous first-class tailors. His shirt was of the
semi-evening type, pale green in colour, and his bow- tie was of a
much darker shade of green.
'I did get it ready, but then I decided I wouldn't want it.'
Carl shook his head.
'Better to have it with you. We are on the river, you know. In fact, the
Lady cruises around the southern islands tonight, so there might be a
breeze.' His tone was brisk, authoritative, the tone a husband would
adopt to his wife. A husband ... So little did she know " of him even
now. .And at times it seemed that she was not married at all, but that
Carl was just a pleasant acquaintance she had met for the first time in
Singapore. Colour mounted her cheeks as she recalled this particular
impression, for it brought with it the memory of that night, and her
total abandonment to Carl's attractions. Surely, she told herself, she
would not have surrendered to a man who was a 'mere acquaintance"!
And yet, as she looked at him now, she was not quite sure. His
features were still harsh, his mouth still" had that quality of cynicism
in the slight lift of one corner as he caught and held her gaze, but oh,
he was handsome! And in a totally different way from Gordon. The
dark skin and those tawny eyes, the angular lines and contours of
severity ... all compounded to create an impression of manly
attractiveness which carried both authority and arrogance that could,
in another man, have detracted from his good looks, but in Carl they
merely added to themat least, in Renny's opinion. She felt a certain
elation in the fact that he had seen her as a woman, that she had
managed to capture and hold his interest when, for over eight years,
he had not found an interest in any particular woman, but had used
them only for his light inconsequential plea-sure, regarding them as
what they werelike the Chinese girl, Masie.
'Would you like another drink?' Her husband's voice broke into her
thoughts and a smile fluttered to her lips, an alluring smile which
matched the captivating glow that was in her eyes. Carl's mouth
moved slightly, as if he were about to say something, but the seconds
sped by and Renny answered his question, saying she did not want
another drink at present. 'In that case,' said Carl preparing to rise,
'we'll collect your cloak and make for the harbour.'
'We'll --?' She stared at him uncomprehendingly.
'I'll come up with you,' he said, and rose to his feet.
Nerves tingled along Renny's spine. Why should he want to come
with her to her room? He could wait here
'Ready?' His brief enquiry brought Renny to her feet. She realised she
would look foolish if she insisted on his staying down here, knew for
sure that some caustic remark would come her way, a remark that
would undoubtedly cause her to blush with embarrassment.
Carl commented on the room, but she sensed that he had been in the
Mandarin bedrooms before. He walked to the window and looked at
the scene far down below. Renny picked up her cloak and stood
staring at his broad back, at the careless way one hand was thrust into
his jacket pocket. His other hand held a cigarette, and when presently
he turned a thin curl of smoke rose as he put the cigarette to his
mouth.
'Very lovely...' The murmured words were like a caress, the
expression in those tawny eyes was unfathomable and yet at the same
time exciting. Carl looked around casually, found the ashtray he was
seeking and stubbed out the cigarette. 'Come here,' he ordered softly,
and pointed to a spot close to his feet. Renny, dry-mouthed, found
words impossible, so she merely shook her head, and lifted her cloak
to one shoulder. Carl pointed again and repeated, 'Come here.' Still
she did not move. It was time they were going, she told him, finding
her voice at last. His eyes were narrowed, his gesture firm and
commanding as even yet again he ordered her to come to him and she
obeyed, carrying her cloak with her. It was taken from her and tossed
carelessly on to a chair. With an imperious gesture Carl tilted up her
face, stared into it for a wordless moment, then pressed his mouth
hard against hers, effectively sealing her lips as she began to say
something. A fierce stab of ecstasy shot through her whole body and
she quivered in his arms. Yet in the midst of her delight she made a
determined effort to divert her mind to Gordon, who would be
shocked by her behaviour and her disloyalty to him. But Carl was
speaking into her thoughts, his lips moist on her ear as he said,
'I've thought about you from time to time over these past years, and I
remembered you were beautiful ... but I never dreamed you could be
so desirable.' His mouth moved, slowly and sensuously from her ear
to her neck, and finally found her lips. She thrilled to the forceful
domination of his kisses, while into her brain the word 'madness!'
intruded. It hammered over and over again with warning insistence.
She was asking for trouble ... asking with all the yearning of a nature
more passionate than she had ever realised could be hers. Carl had
awakened dormant emotions that shook her to the very core, had
ignited a flame as primitive as it was unquenchable. She could in this
moment of ecstasy have surrendered her body to the demands of his,
forgetting they were to dine and dance on the Singapore Lady, for she
had no willpower to withstand the magetism with which he drew her.
He held her from him and laughed softly and with triumph.
'Say you love me,' he commanded imperiously. 'Say it, Renny.'
She swallowed, remembering Gordon and how she had never
doubted her love for him, or that she wanted nothing more than to be
his wife. His kisses were gentle, his embrace of the kind one would
give to a delicate child. Carl seemed not to have any intention of
being gentle, nor to kiss her with reverence, using the lover's tender
art of enticement. No, he had been the imperious lover on that other
occasion, taking, not asking, arrogantly asserting his rights as a
husband, forcing her to his will. True, in the end she had given I up
the struggle, reaping a poignant fulfilment as she was carried to
heights of bliss she had never dreamed existed.
He was speaking again, but even at his masterful insistence she was
unable to voice the words he demanded of her.
'I'm not sure th-that I love you,' she faltered. 'Please, please, Carl,
cancan we go?'
A soft laugh fell on the air, and he pulled her
-
to him; his dark face
above hers portrayed all the arrogant confidence of a man who has no
doubts about the power he exerts.
'You're in a melting mood, my dear. What shall we do?' H
e
bent her
slender body backwards, bringing his own supple frame over it. She
stared, wide-eyed, quivering^ with expectation though her mind
strove to retain some semblance of sanity which would help her
ascend over her own urgent desires. Her husband's hard' demanding
mouth found hers in a kiss\that forced her lips apart and she knew a
pang of sheer bliss, his arms about her were ruthless; she felt bruised,
and her lips were swollen when at last the passion that had consumed
him abated and he let her go.
Shaken to the very core, she turned away, waiting for him to touch
her again.
'Come on, it's time we were going!' Renny spun around, staggered by
the cold conventionality of his voice and manner. 'We don't want the
boat to sail without us.' Striding over to the chair, he gathered up her
cloak and threw it over his arm. Renny picked up her evening bag,
and they stood for a long moment, staring at one another across the
room. Carl broke the silence at last, to say-with a sort of sardonic
confidence, 'You will say you love me, wife! And before many more
hours have passed.'

CHAPTER SEVEN
THEY emerged from the hotel to the lights and din of Orchard Road.
The decorations in preparation for the New Year Festival seemed to
be growing all the time, and more and more friendly dragons adorned
the buildings. The Year of the Dragon. Last year had been the Year of
the Rabbit, Gordon had mentioned to Renny. Next year it might be
the Year of the Dog, or the Cock, depending on the Chinese zodiac.
'It seems strange,' she said in order to break the silence that had fallen
between Carl and herself, 'to think of the New Year at the very end of
January.'
'It's due to the lunar calendar used by the Chinese. New Year falls on
a different day every year.'
'And lots of preparations take place beforehand. Is it right that every
house has to be cleaned right through?'
'Of course.' Carl stepped aside to make way for a barefoot coolie in an
off-white dhoti who was trotting along chewing away at
somethingprobably betel nuts. 'And a week before New Year's Day
itself the Kitchen God starts his journey to heaven, blessed on his way
by the members of the household on whose behaviour he's to report.'
Renny blinked up at him.
'How fascinating! Tell me some more, Carl.' She was "all cool
composure now, determined to retain the sanity which seemed
miraculously to have come to her in this, the more worldly
atmosphere in which she and Carl were moving.
'Well, the members of the household feel they must make sure that
the Kitchen God remembers all the good things they've done and
forgets the bad. So they put cakes and other delicious confections in
front of his shrine, as offerings. This fills his mouth with sweetness
and he then says the nicest things about them when he makes his
report in heaven.'
Renny laughed, a happy tinkling laugh which brought her husband's
head round so that he looked down into her upturned face. He took
her arm unexpectedly, and she felt the pressure of his fingers as,
possessively, he moved them over her arm before closing firmly upon
it.
'It's paganism, isn't it?'
'They believe in it. What is paganism?' he added thoughtfully after a
pause. 'A belief in a god that doesn't happen to be the same god that
you and I believe in?' Scorn, contempt and a sneer were in his voice
as he added, 'Who are we to invent a word like paganism? Wait until
you visit the island of Bali. There this so-called paganism is what the
people live bybut, Renny, you will never in your life meet people
more gentle, more human and simple than the Balinese. They're good
people. Evil is unknown to them. They're faithful, they're loyal. They
would never let you down...' His voice trailed, strangely low and with
a quality of gentleness that brought back with vivid intensity the
young man of twenty-three who was the man she had married. As
Jean had said, Carl had met with disillusionment and it had hardened
him to what he was today. Reiiny fell to wondering what he would
have been like had she not run out . on him, but had 'learned to laugh'
with him one day as he had mentioned. Who knows...? he had hinted,
and he meant that they might one day fall in love. A deep sigh
escaped her; she was glad he could not hear it, for of a certainty he
would have made her tell him the reason for it.
'Tell me some more about the customs,' she invited, anxious to veer
his thoughts from the serious line they were following.
'The Kitchen God returns on New Year's Eve and there's a special
ceremony for him. Also on New Year's Eve there is always a family
reunion dinner when the food, no matter whether the household is
rich or poor, is lavish and abundant. Then on the day itself there used
to be fireworksnot only to let the New Year in but also to scare
away any evil spirits which might be lurking around. However,
fireworks are now banned in Singapore, so we have no more
casualties as there were at one time.'
'That's a good thing. I feel fireworks should be for supervised displays
only, don't you?'
"Most certainly.'
'Tell me about New Year's Day itself.'
'At midnight all doors and windows are opened so that friendly spirits
floating around can enter. Toasts are proposed and then comes the
traditional Chinese greeting, "Kong Hee Fatt Choy", which means, in
addition to the usual one of a Happy New Year, something like, "May
your health increase".'
'I'm glad I'll be here for the New Year celebrations.'
'If Gordon's not .back then I shall escort you to one or two events.'
'If Gordon isn't back...?' Renny felt tingles in the region of her spine.
It sounded very much as if Carl was intending to keep Gordon away
until after the New Year. Or perhaps he would let him come back
until the New Year, then make sure he was called away again...
'It depends on the job,' said Carl with casual in difference. 'If it takes
more time than at first estimated then he will have to stay --'
'By your orders I' flashed Renny.
'By my orders. It's essential that the fault is located and put right as
soon as possible.'
Renny paused before speaking, trying to find some tactful way of
framing her words. But in the end she found herself saying
indignantly,
'You're keeping him away on purpose!'
Carl guided her around a group of Malays chatting on the pavement.
'On purpose for what?' he asked coolly and dispassionately.
'You have somesome ulterior motive.'
He stopped, right in the middle of the pavement, and fixed her eyes.
'Stop being like a naive schoolgirl who's having her very first
experience of calf-love!' he said sharply.
'What do you mean?' Renny began to walk on and he fell into step
beside her.
"Do you want Gordon back?'
"Certainly I do!'
'Liar!' His sidelong glance was contemptuous. 'It's me you want, but
you're too damned proud to admit it. Yes, I'm keeping the fellow
away. I've waited eight years for my wife's company. Fate sent you to
me and by heaven, I shan't allow any other man to interrupt the
pleasure I'm getting! He'll return when I'm ready, and not before!'
Renny stared, stunned by the content of the words and the vehemence
of their delivery. Was he jealous? Her heart jerked at the thought,
since with it came the truism that where there was jealousy there must
be love. But no... Carl was incapable of loving a woman; women
were his playthings, nothing more.
"You seem to forget,' she just had to say, 'that I'm engaged to Gordon,
and that I came here to see you about a divorce so that I could marry
him.'
The hint of a sneer touched the hard outline of his mouth.
'Are you quite sure, Renny, that you yourself haven't at times
forgotten about the divorce you mention?'
She said nothing, because of her doubts, of her .lack of reliance on her
determination to keep to the plans she had made for her future. If by
some miracle it should turn out that her husband loved her, could she
spend the rest of her life with him? She was unable to deny that his
strong virile masculinity, his magnetism and his dominance over her
attracted her far more than she had ever been attracted by Gordon's
manly attributes. Never once had he awakened that ferment of desire
which was so easily awakened by her husband. Never had there been
moments when, had he tempted her, she would have fallen prey to
that temptation. But with Carl ... He had only to beckon and she
would come. His mastery was as exciting as it was invincible, his
demands far easier to meet than to resist. This evening, for instance ...
she could have stayed with him in her room ...
The vital question arising from all this was: could it be desire alone
that made her husband so attractive in her eyes? Was she a wanton
with passions she was unable to control? In marriage there must be
more than physical attraction; there had to be mental and spiritual
attractions as well. One could not spend all one's time making
loveRenny cut her thoughts, painfully aware that her cheeks had
Coloured brightly. She forced herself to think of Gordon. There he
was, working hard, believing she would go to her room at half- past
.nine and read a book or watch the television, when in Reality she
would cruising around the islands with her husband, in the romantic
setting of the boat and the music and excellent food and wine. They
would dance together, swaying in each other's arms, their bodies
close ... far too close, and intimate.
She glanced sideways at him, at his firm strong profile, and realised
he was waiting for her answer to his question. She made none, but
blurted out instead, her conscience driving her, torturing her,
'Carl, I don't want to go with you! Take me back to the
Mandarinplease! Gordon thinks I'll be in my - room by half-past
nine and he's going to phone me! I want to go back!' she added with
loud insistence when her husband made no attempt to stop.
'Conscience caught up with you?' A low laugh indicated his amused
contempt. 'Don't be so damned stupid! You're with your husband, so
why should you be assailed by conscience and the idea that these
delights are stolen ones? Snap out of it, Renny, and be your age! The
last thing you want is to go back to your room and sit there waiting for
a phone call from Gordon.'
'IIOh, Carl, you're making me hate myself!' The cry was uttered
on a despairing, strangled note, but her husband remained immune to
her distress.
'Take what life is offering,' he advised shortly. 'Do you suppose I
would take you back? I'm your husband, Renny, and the sooner you
accept that the better you'll feel about these pleasant little jaunts we're
having together.' Temptation again! She must resist himshe must!
She said, tugging in an endeavour to wrench herself free of his grip,
'If it were you, Carl, and I was intending to marry you, you wouldn't
like --'
"We've been into that,' he broke in roughly. 'I said I'd take a whip to
you and I meant it.' A significant pause before he added, 'And as your
husband, I might be tempted to take a whip to you if you don't do as
you're told! I'm not in the least pleased at the idea of your being with
Gordonnot at any time at all. I have the right to forbid you from
going out with him, remember.'
'Oh, for heaven's sake, talk sense! I'm my own mistress and I'll go
about with anyone I like!'
Carl continued determinedly to hold on to her arm. They were at the
teeming waterfront and the Singapore Lady was waiting for the
diners and dancers to board her. The lights were tempting; the cool
water shone beneath the argent glow of a full moon floating in the
dark sky of a truly Asian night. Romance filled the air, delights
seemed to await her. Happy people were getting ready to board the
boat. Carl was urging his wife forward ... and she gave up the struggle
with her conscience, abandoned it in favour of the pleasures which
were hers for the taking,

It seemed to Renny afterwards that the hours had floated away on
wings of sheer magic and romance. She had been on air when dancing
with her husband, had responded eagerly to his movements even
though at times they could only be described as sensuous. The food at
dinner had included fresh lobsters and charcoal broiled American
beefsteaks. A superb wine had washed these down, but later Carl
called for a bottle of champagne.
'I can't take too much,' Renny protested, but her husband had his way,
as always.
'Champagne is good for you,' he declared. 'And if it makes you gay so
much the better.'
'I'll be more than gay!' But Renny laughed merrily for all the
vehemence of her protests.
When' the time arrived for them to disembark she could not have said
whether she was glad or sorry. Such a memorable evening had sped
by far too swiftly ... but all was not over yet...
'You'll let me stay with you tonight?' The whispered words, spoken
quietly while they were drinking their champagne, had sounded like a
plea, but Renny heard the edge of mastery in them and, wondered if
her refusal would carry any weight.
'Don't be silly! No, I won't let you stay!'
'I believe you will, my dear.' So confident, so arrogantly sure of
himself... and-of her! Renny wished she could be angry with him, but
she could never let anything mar this blissful evening.
'Then,' she told him lightly, 'you're in for a disappointment !'
*We shall see.' He had filled her glass, watching her through
half-closed eyes as she drank from it. He saw her smile, her happy
eyes, the lovely rosy lips that he knew were his for the taking. Then
he laughed as a memory intruded, and he teasingly assured her that
her glass contained nothing else but champagne. She laughed with
him, but blushed when he said,
'You will agree, darling, that you don't need love potions to make you
desire me. And why shouldn't you desire your husband?' A pause, but
she could not trust herself to speak. 'There's no reason why your
husband shouldn't stay with you tonight, is there?'
Renny had made no answer, but later, when he took her away from
the dancers to find a dark and secret place on the deck, she had known
from the first touch of his lips on her mouth and his hands on her
breast that she would raise no objection to his spending the night with
her.
They entered the Mandarin Square to find it thronged with
peopleAustralian tourists on an escorted trip to Singapore,
Bangkok and Hong Kong.
'Do you want a drink?' Carl asked, and Renny shook her head.
'I've had more than enough! I feel as if I'm floating...'
'Do you?' Her husband's eyes were laughing as he took her hand and
led her to one of the lifts. 'Good, I like my women this way. They
reciprocate, far more satisfactorily if they've indulged in a good wine
first.'
The words acted like shock treatment; Renny was cold suddenly, and
no longer floating. But yet she still could not bear to spoil the
evening, and her voice was almost gentle as she said, looking up into
his eyes,
'I don't care for that kind of talk, Carl. Itit-hurts me.'
His eyes glimmered with the most odd expression.
'You're a strange girl,' was all he said, and Renny tried to forget what
he had said and to focus her mind on the pleasures she would soon be
sharing with him.
In her bedroom, he held her close for a while, kissing her with a
passion that seemed to vibrate from the very heart of him. Renny
responded, and a fire was set alight as they clung to one another. At
his unbridled primitive caresses she felt her senses reel; she coloured
a little when eventually he began to undress her, but she stood meekly
and made no protest. The blouse-top was removed with the simple
expertise that told her without any doubt at all that he had done this
many times before. He kissed the tender curves of her breasts before
unzipping the slacks. She felt the warmth of his hand on her back and
trembled with a sort of exquisite fear as it strayed, possessively lower,
until she was on fire with longing for him. She lifted her face,
offering her lips. He stood unmoving for a few seconds, then he
forced hey backwards and her body arched to meet his. His mouth
claimed and possessed and bruised; his passion, fully and completely
released, threatened to consume them both.
Through the tender mists of her own desire came her husband's voice,
'Yes, my darling, the champagne has done its work.'
She shuddered, so. violently that he brought her up, held her at arms'
length, and stared.
'What's the matter?'
She looked dumbly into his face. The beauty of the evening seemed to
fade, die like a rose under frost. The lovemaking for which she craved
became sordid, unwholesome! With a convulsive twist of her near-
naked body she was free, and she put the greatest distance between
them that she could.
'Go home,' she seethed, fire and fury in her eyes. 'I don't want you
anywhere near me! Do you hear?' Carl merely stared, as if he failed to
comprehend the unexpected change from the quiescent, submissive
captive to this wide-eyed, wrathful spitfire who was ordering him to
leave. Then suddenly his eyes began to narrow and in three or four
long strides he had crossed the room and seized her wrist in a brutal
grip that caused her to wince with pain.
'What the devil's got into you now?' he demanded, his insolent glance
raking her body, her lovely slender body clad only in its scant and
dainty undergarments. 'I see,' he went on with a sort of amused
tolerance which infuriated her, 'we're to have a little battle, are we?'
His next words were eloquent of his familiarity with this type of
situation. 'A feminine whim designed to increase my ardour; a protest
which in your heart of hearts you know full well I'll ignore. You want
me to take you by force, is that it?' Mockery and contempt mingled
with the dark arid threatening passion in his tawny eyes. 'I'm game,
my sweet! If that's the way you want it to be --'
'I don'tOh, you don't understand! It --' She was not allowed to
continue with her protest as, tilting up her head with an arrogant hand
beneath her chin, Carl crushed her lips beneath his own. At first she
struggled, but the triumph of his dominance and virility over her
feeble efforts soon resulted in total capitulation, and, exhausted, she
stood passive in his arms. He laughed softly, exulting in his easy
conquest of her. He was no fool; through his experience of women he
knew she was as much the victim of her own sensual craving as she
was of his mastery. Renny squirmed at the knowledge that he was
fully aware that his attraction for her had become all-consuming,
knew that he and he alone could give her the untold delights for
which she avidly longed. His lips were leaving her mouth, to find the
tender curve of a breast; she quivered against his hard and sinewed
body, his lips on her bare flesh a heady and thrilling experience.
'Do you still want me to go?' Carl's voice was edged with humour as,
holding her from him, he asked the question.
Her mouth quivered tremulously.
'You spoiled it by mentioning the champagne,' she told him.
'What had that to do with it?'
'You made it all sound cheap and sordid.'
'You wanted it to be ... romantic?' Carl's voice held a strange
inflection.
'Yes, Carl, I did.'
'Then it shall be, my lovely wife.'
She was content, and gave a little sigh of rapture when, after
responding to the sensuous pressure of his ' body against hers, she felt
herself lifted as easily as if she were a doll, and carried across the
room.
His hands caressed her, stimulating. her senses, her desires, until she
was lost in a dream world of romance. Lovemaking with her husband
was a glorious adventure, and as she lay there, supine and eager to be
possessed, she thought sadly of all she and Carl had missed, missed
because she had run out on him all those years ago.
'Happy, my sweet?' His mouth found her throat and her cheek and her
lips.
'So very happy, Carl.'
'It was ordained that we would meet again, and become lovers.'
'Yes, I believe it was.'
'You will always want me.' It was a statement but a question too.
'Always.' His enduring dominance and mastery would for ever hold
her prisoner.
It was some time later that his ardour having spent itself, Carl held his
wife in his arms and said softly, 'Tell me you love me, Renny.'
She was silent, lost in the blissful afterglow bf his fiery lovemaking.
But his voice came to her again in the cool darkness, a voice of
insistence and arrogant command.
'Say you love me!'
She hesitated, wondering if she did love him. Her mind was too hazy
for. concentrated thought and she said meekly,
'I love you, Carl.'
His arms tightened and his warm body came close again.
'I told you I'd make you say itand before many hours had passed!'
The sheer triumph in his voice ought by rights to have angered her,
but she had no room for anger in her heart when he was holding her
like this, and his hand was moving to caress her, and tempt again.
'Yes,' she murmured drowsily, 'you did say you'd make me say I love
you.'
He made love to her much later and again asked her to say she loved
him. She obeyed, and wondered why he laughed. But perhaps he
hadn't laughed. She was so tired and so content that she could not
think properly about anything except that she was beside her husband
and that she would soon be asleep in his arms. She heard -him say,
'Do you mean it, Renny?'
'I mean it, Carl..."
'I believe you do.'
'You sound so satisfied ... like someone who has ... scored a ... a great
victory...'
'I have scored a great victory.'
Renny yawned and snuggled close to him. 'What did you ... say ... ?'
'Never mind. Goodnight, my darling.'
'GoodnightOh, Carl, I'm so very tired ...'

CHAPTER EIGHT
WHEN Renny awoke the following morning it was to find herself
alone. She stared at the vacant pillow disbelievingly and then her
spirits sank down with the weight of distress that began to drag at
them. To be left like thisleft without a word, just as if she were a --
The colour rose in her cheeks at the thought. It deepened as she got
out of bed and regarded her naked body in the mirror opposite to her.
What sort of a girl was she? The fact that Carl was her rightful
husband did not seem to excuse her wanton behaviour. Yes, it was
wanton! No use pretending that she was a nice girl, not when she had
gone out with Carl knowing that the final scene of the night's pleasure
would almost certainly be enacted in her bedroom at the hotel.
She showered and dressed, thinking of Gordon and remembering
with a terrible pang of guilt that he would have telephoned last
evening, after half-past nine. She had not even thought of it when she
and Carl returned. In any case, Gordon would not have phoned then,
at that late hour. How many times had he phoned before that, though?
If his last attempt to get her was around eleven or half-past then he
would certainly want to know where she had been.
Should she confess and get the whole wretched business off her
conscience? Last night she had almost decided-that she and Carl
would come together, but on the other hand, he had not told her he
loved herthis in the face of his demand that she should say that she
loved him.
Yes, last night the situation seemed very different from what it was
this morning. Carl had left quietly without a word, gone home to his
penthouse to sleep it off, no doubt! Renny seethed as she picked up a
brush and dragged it through her hair.
Supposing she did make a full confession to Gordon, then swear that
she would never have anything to do with her husband again. Would
he forgive her, and marry her? It was a debatable question, that was
for sure. The other thing was that, should Gordon be so
disgustedand he certainly had every right to be- that he threw her
over, then she would be out of a job. There would be nothing for it but
to make her way back to England and start all over again. She was
sure she would never be fortunate enough to land a job like the one
she had now.
But did she want to marry Gordon ...? Carl had firmly stated that, had
she loved him, nothing would have induced her to sleep with her
husband. Cold logic ... and yet she could not believe that all was over
between Gordon and herself.
'What a mess I seem to have made of my life! I'm not fit to handle my
own destiny! First I run out on my husband, then, just when my life is
nice and orderly and I'm engaged to a charming man whose career
will take him right to the top, I go and mess it all up by having an
affair with the husband I deserted !'
Renny sighed and began to cry. Crying, she soon realised, would not
get her very far! She ought to be doing, something concrete in an
endeavour to sort out the mess she had so stupidly got herself into. It
was all a case of coming to a decision. She ought to make a clean
breast of things to Gordon. Her thoughts were interrupted by the shrill
ringing of the telephone and her heart gave a great lurch. Gordon!
Instinct told her that it was he and not Carl. 'Renny?' The voice came
instantly she had picked up the receiver, and before she herself had
time to speak.
'Yesyes, Gordon...'
'I tried to get you last night! Rang four times! Where the devil were
you?'
'I wentwent outtoto a sh-show.'
O, what a tangled web we weave ... The quotation echoed again and
again through Renny's brain, robbing her of the ability to concentrate
on what Gordon was saying. But she did catch the word, Carl, and
murmured in response,
'Carl?'
'Yes, Carl! He's part owner of this factory and I'm damned sure he's at
the bottom of my being here! There isn't anything wrong with this
plant that can't be dealt with by the engineers here, yet the manager
won't let me come away! Have you seen Carl?'
No more deceit, she resolved. 'Yesyes, I d-did see
himyesterday,' she admitted.
'Where? When?' --'
'It was-look, Gordon, it isn't the time for talking. I haven't had my
breakfast yet. I'll phone you later, if you'll be theresay about ten
o'clock?'
'There's something going on!' Loud the tone and positive. Renny
could find no words to deny or admit this pronouncement. 'You've
been different since meeting Carl again! I'm anxious to get back,
because then I intend to sort it out! You admit to seeing him
yesterday, but you don't want to talk about it. Damned funny, to my
way of thinking!'
'Gordon, don't be angry...'
'You haven't even begun to discuss the divorce. Yet you've had
several opportunities! If you see him again then you'd better get it
settled, because I'm just about coming to the end of my patience!' And
without giving Renny time to speak Gordon rang off.
Weak at the. knees, she sat down in a chair. It was all getting out of
hand, her situation worsening all the time. She thought of breakfast
and rang down for a pot of coffee. Food would just about choke her,
the way she was feeling at present.
She rang the Zephyr, getting through to Carl on his private number.
'HelloRenny? Good morning to you, my dear. Sorry I had to leave
early, but I had something important to do this morning. You look
adorable when you're asleep, by the way.'
He sounded casual, as if he was speaking to one of a number of
girl-friends with whom he spent the night now and then. Renny's
temper flared, but she was as angry with herself as with Carl. She. had
asked for all she had received, and now, it would appear, she was to
pay dear for her folly.
'Gordon's just rung,' she said quiveringly. 'He wanted to know where I
was last night!'
'Didn't you tell him you were with meor rather, that I was with
you?' Amusement came through on Carl's clear firm voice and
Renny's fury increased.
'Don't be ridiculous! He rang me several times, but couldn't get me --'
'Naturally he couldn't get you. If he'd rung later he would
have -- -- Carl stopped and a low laugh came over the wires. 'It would
have been most inconvenient for us, though, wouldn't it? Would you,
my dear, have got up to take the call? And what would you have
answered if Gordon had asked what you were doing --'
'Be quiet!' Renny's colour was high; her anger was even higher. 'You
might think it's something to laugh about, but what about me? I don't
know what to say to Gordon. If I lose him I lose my job as well!'
'Do you really care if you lose him?'
'I care if I lose my job I'
'So your main interest in the man is that he's your employerwell, if
not your employer then the man in control of your job.'
Renny said after a pause,
'Can I talk to you, Carl?'
'Now?' He sounded short and impatient, she thought.
'Well... when it's convenient for you.'
A pause, long and, for Renny, tense.
'Come over,' Carl said at last. 'About noon, and we'll talk over lunch.'
She replaced the receiver without a word, knowing she had been
slighted, as it was Carl's place either to come here for lunch or at least
to offer to fetch her. It was the height of discourtesy for him to tell
her, in that casual tone, to come over to his place.
However, she had to go; it was imperative for her to see him and talk.
She had to know where she stood ...
Her thoughts drifted and she was remembering his insistence that she
say she loved him. Did she love him? She desired him, thrilling to his.
lovemaking, giving her all in full submission to his mastery.
Physically he was her ideal ... but, as before, she was admitting that
marriage meant far more than that. What of Carl's feelings for her?
The way he had just spoken seemed proof that she meant nothing to
him, and yet he had asked her to give their marriage a trial.
A sigh escaped her and for a moment she tried to shed her troubles
and relax. The couch with its soft cushions was inviting; she sat down
with her steaming coffee, which had been brought up a moment or
two before. How optimistic she had been when she and Gordon came
here, to Singapore! The future was a soft bed of roses, without a
single cloud to cast a shadow upon it. And in three short weeks chaos
hadentered her life and she was floundering, unable to form any clear
picture of her future. It could be with Carlor it could be with
Gordon. More than likely it would be with neither.
And the distressing truth loomed up over and over again: she would
be out of a job if Gordon cast her off. The other nagging worry was
that she could quite easily be expecting Carl's child, and if so, she saw
no alternative than to accept his offer and give the marriage a trial --
'Oh, God, why did I act so foolishly as to get myself into a position
like this?' Tears started to her eyes, to be brushed angrily away as she
determinedly discarded self-pity before it could take on too strong a
hold and cast her into absolute despair.
The next few hours were troubled and restless, but she could not go
out, even to the shops. The room seemed, to be a sanctuary of peace
and she stayed in it all the morning, trying to read but for most of the
time pacing the floor.
Carl was not in the lobby of the Zephyr when she arrived, and she
went up in the lift on her own, a ripple of anger persisting even
though' she felt that diplomacy would be the best policy in her
conversation with her husband.
He met her at the door, which was already open when she reached it.
Tall and aristocratic and disturbingly cool, he invited her in and
indicated a chair. She remained standing, flushed now and
embarrassed became he was so debonair and self-assured,
immaculately dressed in light brown slacks and an overshirt in
bright-coloured Thai silk. His hair shone, clean and sleek but with a
most attractive kink at one side that was neither a wave nor a curl.
'Iwe must talk, Carl,' she began, but had no idea what she intended
to say next.
He strode casually over to the cocktail cabinet and filled two glasses
with sherry. . --?
'What's wrong?' He handed her the glass, which she took impatiently
and placed On a table by her side. 'You can't really be troubled about
Gordon. I've pointed out that you can't possibly love him because if
you did then you wouldn't have slept with me- --'
'Carl,' she begged, 'please don't keep on reminding me of it!'
He lifted one eyebrow amusedly.
'Reminding you? Surely you don't mean to tell me you need any
reminding of anything so pleasurable as last night?'
'I shouldn't have done it!'
Carl gave a crack of laughter.
'How many women have said that on the morning after? You can't put
back the clock, Renny. What's done is done --'
'Yes! And now I want to try and settle my life again! Gordon knows
that you had a hand in his being away from me! He's suspicioushe
was even earlier, because I had to keep on telling him that we hadn't
discussed the divorce!'
'There wasn't any time. We were enjoying ourselves. In any case, I've
said that there'll be no swift divorce. Surely you told him of my
objection?
She nodded, moving over to the window and staring unseeingly at the
spate of activity below.
'I did tell him, yes, and he's intending to tackle you himself at the first
opportunity.'
'He is?' Carl took a sip of his sherry and added, 'Then he'll have my
candid opinionthat I don't feel he's the right man for you.'
'Gordon and I are the best judges of what's right for us!' The retort
was defensive, but secretly Renny was heeding her husband's words.
'Can you go to him, as his wife, with our affair on your conscience?'
he asked slowly.
'I've thought of making a confession.'
'Gordon's reaction should be interesting,' was Carl's sardonic
rejoinder. 'Will he have the guts to give you what you deserve, I
wonder?'
Renny coloured with anger, and her small hands closed at her sides.
'Gordon's not like you. He's gentle andand kind.'
'As I was once, if you remember? Kindness to women is wasted.
Brute force is what they understand better ... and respond to.'
She turned, her eyes sparkling.
'The women you associate with might respond to brute force, but
Western women never would!'
'Women the world over are much the same. They need mastering.
You've never been mastered, and look what you are.'
'What am I?'
'A woman who, although engaged to one man, thinks nothing of
having an affair with another --'
'That other is my husband!' interrupted Renny fiercely. 'Don't you
dare to brand me aaoh, you know what I mean!' She was on the
verge of tears, for this was not what she had visualised when she rang
this morning, asking to see him. At the back of her mind lay the
possibility of his asking her once again to consider giving their
marriage a trial. It would at least have, opened one door by which she
could find some soft of escape from the nagging worries that assailed
her.
'Your husband? Up till now you've firmly asserted that I'm not really
your husband.' Carl's eyes swept her over with contempt. 'However,
when it suits you you're willing to admit that we are husband and
wife.' He turned away, a sneer on his lips, and lighted a cigarette
which he took from a silver box on a small side-table. 'You're a
wanton, Renny, but a damned attractive one for all that. Your ways
under certain conditions delight me as no other woman has delighted
me. You too enjoy our intimate relationship. Shall we give our
marriage a trial?'
So the offer had come, but not in the way she had wanted it to come.
She, Renny, was a wanton in his eyes, but a more desirable wanton
than any other with whom he had associated. The tears which
threatened began to fall, she despised herself for the weakness but
was unable to stop crying, and she turned from him, bringing out a
handkerchief and dabbing at her eyes. Unemotionally he watched her,
a man detached and contemptuous, a man without pity or the desire to
understand. Renny lifted her face at last, a beautiful, tear-stained face
that appeared to leave him cold? But he said after a while,
'Come here, Renny,' and this time she obeyed meekly and at once.
'Why the tears? You have no need of self-pity. Marriage to Gordon
would have brought you utter disillusionment, simply because you're
not suited to one another. You'll lose your job if you part from him,
but you have my offer, which, materially, will benefit you far more
than any job that Gordon can give you, and far more than he can
provide as your husband. Come to me, as I suggest. Physically, we're
totally compatible. As for anything elsewell, we shall see.'
She had her head averted, but she felt his hand beneath her chin and
she was forced to look up, into his eyes. She was remembering his
words about their being able to laugh together one day, and she
wondered if this were possible, even though he had just declared her
to be a wanton. His opinion of her might change after a while...It
might, but what if it did not? Supposing he regarded her always as
another Masie, a girl to use for his pleasure and to cast off in favour of
another when he tired of her?
His hand moved, to finger her damp cheek. She quivered beneath his
touch and when his lips came down on hers she responded even while
despising herself for her easy submission to the dominating attitude
he invariably adopted with her.
'You said last night that you loved me.' Carl spoke as his mouth left
hers. 'Did you mean it?'
She shook her head.
'I said it because you coerced me.'
'I persuaded, my dear.'
'Your idea of persuasion's all wrong. You forced me to say it.'
'And you didn't mean it?' Half question, half statement. 'I believe you
could love me, given time.'
'And you, Carl?' She looked into his tawny eyes, searching for some
sign of that softness she had once known. But his expression was
mask-like, unreadable. 'Could you ever love me?'
The shaft of a smile lifted one corner of his mouth. It was as if her
question had caused him a hint of "Amusement. --.
'Do you think I'm capable of love?' he asked, turning to stub out his
cigarette in an ashtray.
'You said yourself that you loved once.'
'A long, long time ago.'
''Love could come again.' Was she pleading? And if so, from what
cause did her pleading stem? Was she in love with himor perhaps
near to loving him? Once again she was confronted with the question:
was his attraction for her merely physical?
'Love could come again, granted,' agreed Carl, rather to her surprise.
'However,' he added after a pause, 'Love between you and me doesn't
really matter. When we married there was never any question of love.
Yet we were both hopeful of making a success of our marriage.' He
regarded her sternly for a moment before continuing, 'Had you not
run off I'm sure we'd have made a success of it eventually.'
'You believed we'd have learned to love one another?'
'I was very youngYes, I suppose, at that time, I was optimistic
enough to believe that you and I would learn to love one another,
once We'd recovered from our respective heartaches. The
reappearance of your fianc was perhaps the most unfortunate
circumstance for us both, because we've drifted since then, neither of
us having found a safe anchor.'
Renny looked at him, noticing that the mask had slid over his features
again. She recalled Jean saying that Carl was a lonely man, and the
words he had just uttered seemed to confirm the statement.
She felt sorry for him, but was doubtful if she could accept his offer
regarding their marriage. It was impossible to explain to him that,
without love, she would starve, in spite of the sheer ecstasy and
fulfilment she would derive from .the physical side of the marriage.
She would starve for companionship, for an intimacy that had nothing
to do with sex, for a love that was spiritual, the kind that would abide
until her last moment on earth was lived. He would not understand,
because he had allowed hurt and disillusionment to warp his mind
and rob him of the power to love and the desire to be loved in return.
He was speaking, telling her that he'd ordered lunch in the Arcadia
Restaurant, where a typical English meal was to be served to them.
'We could have lunched here, in private,' he added, "but I thought
you'd like the Arcadia. It's different
from the other restaurants we have here; it's more English than
Oriental.'
'We seem to have done all our talking,' she said in a flat tone of voice.
'Perhaps I should go back to the Mandarin. Gordon might phone.'
She drained her glass and put it down. The dull apathy of her tone and
action drew Carl's attention, to her face. She tried to shake off her
dejection, to appear cheerful, but knew she had failed when he said, a
frown on his. brow,
'What's the. matter, Renny? You say we've done all our talking, but
have you come to any conclusion? Obviously not,' he went on,
answering his own question. 'Come on, we'll have a nice quiet
lunchI've a table in a little palm-sheltered corner of the
restaurantand talk this thing out. You must reach some sort of a
decision, mustn't you?'
She nodded dumbly, and allowed him to take her hand and -draw her
towards the door. She felt there was nothing to be gained by staying
with him ... but she hated the idea of going back to her hotel and
sitting in her room, brooding on her folly and trying to find the best
way out of her difficulties.
The table to which they were shown was indeed sheltered from all
others by the potted palms around it. Even at this time of day there
were candles on the table, and small lights hung in the foliage of the
palms. Romantic ... Always she was finding herself in a romantic
setting. It was as if she were to be tempted all .the time. --'
They ate a meal of pate maison, duckling braised with orange sauce,
glazed carrots, duchesse potatoes and several other vegetables, and
fresh fruit salad with whipped cream.
They talked as they ate; Renny telling Carl that she could not accept
his proposition without a great deal of thought. It was a momentous
decision and therefore not one she could make in a hurry. She then
went on to talk about Gordon, repeating what she had said regarding
his assertion that Carl was responsible for his absence.
'I'm sure he's guessed that you're keeping him away so that you can
see me,' she ended, and Carl lifted his brows a fraction.
'If he thinks that then why the devil doesn't he come back, challenge
me and tell me that both I and the job can go to hell?'
She looked at him over the rim of her wineglass.
'You'd do that, if the positions were reversed?' she said.
'In quick time!'
'Perhaps it's as well that you've never had a wife living with you; Carl.
You'd always be showing her her place.'
'I'd certainly not have her going around with other men! As I already
said, women don't understand kid- glove treatment. A man must
master his wife or by God she'll lead him a fine dance!'
She had to smile.
'You tell me that, yet ask me to live with you as your wife?'
'You, Renny, would respond to the firm hand. You might feign
indignation at certain things I say and do, but I think I understand
women sufficiently well to be sure that you're one of those who is
happier when being mastered.'
Strangely, she did not resent his statement. She said after a while,
placing her glass on its coaster and looking across at him,
'You're thinking of beforewhen I was eighteen?'
'Perhaps. A very charming eighteen-year-old you were, too. Young
and obedient. You looked up to me as someone way above you, I
remember.' She nodded, and a faraway smile fluttered to her lovely
mouth.
'Yes, I did look up to you, Carl. You seemed so much older than I, and
superior. I felt I had to obey you --' She stopped, faintly embarrassed
by her confessions, yet she was able to continue after a while> when
he made no attempt to speak. 'I sensed that you would be angry if I
did anything to displease you, so I was tractableand obedient, as
you say.' Her voice was low and sweet, tinged with a regret of which
she was unaware. Carl looked at her with an inscrutable expression
and said presently,
'You still have some of that eighteen-year-old in you, Renny.' And,
when she made no comment, 'You came to me today wanting to talk.
Well, we've talked, but you don't seem to have made any firm
decision about your future. It's in your hands, you know. Everyone is
captain of his or her own destiny --'
'I've heard that said before, but it isn't so,' she broke in impatiently.
'Did I, personally, plan what has happened to me since I came .here?'
His eyes widened in surprise.
'Most certainly you're responsible for your own actions,' he replied.
'No one forced you into anything, did they?' She had to agree, but
went on to say,
'If you hadn't been so --' She stopped, and spread her hands
expressively. 'If you hadn't tempted me...'
'Coward to blame me,' he murmured, holding her gaze. .'As I've
pointed out, you'd not have succumbed if you'd been in love with this
man you're engaged to.'
She glanced away, her ear catching the soft sweet strain of a waltz
coming from a tape recorder somewhere in the main part of the
restaurant.
'I wish I could think properly,' she said at last.
'And make your decision? Well, if you're going to turn down my own
proposal you've only two courses open to you. Either you can stay
with Gordon or you can give him up.'
'You're so calm about it! Don't you care that you've ruined my life?'
He looked at her with an unfathomable expression.
'I've just said, Renny, that it was in your own hands. Why blame me
for your actions? You wanted me desperately, and you threw all
else to the four winds. Did you give a thought to Gordon when you
accepted my invitation to dine and dance last night? Can you claim
that you didn't know what was to happen afterwards?' He paused a
moment, mockery in his gaze. 'You haven't anything to say? Well, by
your silence you condemn yourself, but at least you're honest; you
haven't denied anything.'
'Why,' she asked after a long and thoughtful pause, 'do you want me
as your wifeif I'm a no-good, I mean?'
'I didn't say you're a no-good.'
'Not in so many wordsalthough you have called me a wanton,
remember?'
He ignored that and said,
'You know why I want you as my wife. You give me more than any
other woman has. However, if the idea doesn't appeal to you then
we'll forget it.'
Somehow, as she looked into his face, Renny had the strong
conviction that he had no intention of forgetting it. She felt sure he
would broach the subject again, and before very long.
When she left him half an hour later she wondered what she had
gained by seeing him at all. Her situation was as bad as ever, and she
half decided that she would make a clean breast of it to Gordon and
shape her life according to his reaction. But no sooner was this
decision made than she made another, and this time it was a very firm
one. She would tell Gordon that she no longer loved him and that she
was breaking the engagement. It was the only honest way, for
although she still had a deep affection for him, she was forced to
admit that Carl was right when he said that if she really loved Gordon
she could not under any circumstances have allowed another man to
make love to her.
Two days later Gordon rang to say he would be back that evening in
time for dinner.
'I've missed you like hell!' he told her over the phone. 'I shall tackle
Carl and get the matter of the divorce thrashed out without any more
delay.'
Renny looked at the receiver, not trusting herself to speak. For to tell
him that she was breaking the engagement was out of the question.
She could never do a thing like that over the telephone. On the other
hand, she hated the idea of his looking forward eagerly to being with
her, and doing all those things they had planned to do together.
To her relief he began talking again, about the job mainly, admitting
that, in the end, he had found a bad fault of sorts, and had successfully
dealt with it.
'Nevertheless,' he went on in a voice tinged with anger, 'I feel sure
that Carl had something to do with my being away all this time.
However, darling, it's over now, and if ever I have to come here again
I shall insist that my secretary accompanies me.'
Renny went out after lunch, just to saunter round the streets and look
in the shop windows. She had not gone far along Orchard Road when
she came face to face with Jean.
'Hi, there! How's it going?'
'Fine, thanks,' smiled Renny. 'Aren't you working today?'
1

'It's my lunch break- Late, I know, but we don't close the shop and we
happened to be busier than usual, so I stayed behind to help the other
two assistants.' Her eyes scanned Renny's attire. 'You look very
smart,' she observed. 'Been shopping for Thai silk, I see. That dress is
gorgeous I'
'Thank you,' said Renny, smiling again. 'I bought the silk and had it
made. It was done in forty-eight hours.'
Jean nodded her head.
'They do that here. Some tailors'll make a man's suit in twenty-four
hours. And they're perfectly cut and sewnwhich reminds me! I saw
Carl the evening before last going into the Raffles. He had-Rona with
him. They stopped to chat a moment and Carl said he'd gone to the
airport to meet her very early on the Wednesday morning. They
looked very impressive, both of them, superbly dressed for dinner.
Carl looked absolutely immaculate in a brand new suit of olive green
linen. I couldn't help remarking on it and he laughed and said he'd had
it made in twenty-four hours by Jimmy Changis anything wrong,
Renny?'
Renny shook her head. It was an automatic gesture and she spoke at
the same time.
'Carl met her at the airport on Wednesday morning " early, you said?'
Wednesday ... the morning he had left her room at the Mandarin,
silently, and early. He was going to bring his ex-fiancee from the
airport. 'Where is she staying?'
'With friends for a few days, but after that at the Zephyr, as Carl's
guest. It's usual,' shrugged Jean carelessly. 'She always does that.' She
glanced at her wrist- watch and added swiftly, 'I must fly. Sorry,
Renny, to dash off before we've had time to chat! Let's get together
for a super meal one evening. I'll arrange it via Carlso long!'
'Goodbye...'Renny stood and stared at her disappearing back, her
mind filled with what she had just heard. Carl had left her bed to go
and fetch his old flame from the airport. He had something important
to do, he had told Renny later. Sickened, she turned and made her
way back to the hotel. She felt cheap and small and ashamed. What
kind of a man was her husband to act like that? Yet in all fairness she
had to admit that he had never pretended, never tried to hide his true
nature from her. On the contrary, he seemed to revel in his role of
man of the world and womaniser. Was he with Rona at this moment?
Renny had been half expecting him to ring her, to ask her out to dine
and dance again. His silence had puzzled her, but now it was
explained. He was with Rona ... whose company he obviously
preferred to that of his wife.
The Mandarin was reached and Renny entered the lobby. She had
never been in any of the bars on her own but, today, she felt the need
of a drink and she went up to the Mezzanine floor and walked into the
Clipper Bar.
Sitting in a corner, their heads close, were Carl and a girl of striking
appearance. She had silver blonde hair, straight and immaculately
coiffured with a French pleat to one side of the back of her head. Her
cotton dress was in cornflower blue, and as she raised her head Renny
saw that her big, widely-spaced eyes were exactly the same colour.
Carl happened to turn his head sideways, and his gaze met that of his
wife. Rising at once, he beckoned and said,
'Hello, Renny. Meet Rona, my very good friend. Rona, another very
good friend of mine, Renny.'
The girls shook hands. Rona's stare was suddenly insolent, her voice
smooth and cold as glass as she said,
'How do you do, Renny?'
'Happy to meet you,' was Renny's equally cold response. She was
aware of a vicious stab of jealousy piercing the very heart of her.
Carl, urbane and unruffled as ever, signalled a white-coated waiter
and at the same time asked Renny what she would like to drink. He
had already vacated his chair for her and was standing, towering
above the silent-footed Chinese waiter who approached him for the
order.
'Rona's here for a month, or perhaps longer.' Carl took possession of
the chair that had been brought over from another table for him. 'We
must all have a meal together one evening. Renny's engaged to a man
named Gordon Elmsley,' Carl went on for Rona's benefit. 'He's at the
Jurong factory at present --' He stopped and looked at Renny, a hint of
mockery in his eyes. 'He'll be back this evening, I believe?'
'Yes, he rang to say he'll be back.'
'The plant's working satisfactorily, I heard."
'I believe so,' returned Renny. And, forgetting that Gordon had after
all found a fault in the plant, 'I rather think there never was very much
wrong with it.'
Rona was looking puzzled, and by no means as happy as when Renny
first set eyes on her as she entered the bar.
'What's all this about?' she wanted to know, glancing from Renny to
Carl. 'Does the man work for you?'
'Not exactly, but the firm he works for in England is connected with
several of our factories. He's working here, but he had to go out to
Jurong when something went wrong with one of the plants.'
Carl brought out his cigarette case and offered it to Rona, Who took a
cigarette and held it between perfectly manicured fingers, long
elegant fingers, supple and white.
"Would you care for a cigarette, Renny?'
'No, thank you, Carl. You know I don't smoke.'
'Not usually ... but I thought you might like to have one now.' The
sardonic amusement in his voice was reflected in his eyes. Renny
.seethed and stiffened, sure that he was adding, to himself, 'A
cigarette would soothe those out-of-control nerves of yours.'
Yes, he had guessed, with that keen perception of his, that her nerves
were playing her up. But had he guessed at the real reason for the way
she was feeling? Her fears had come a few days ago ... vague at first,
so vague in fact that she was able to throw them off without undue
effort. It was silly to get all worked up, she told herself. Everything
would be-all right. But now ... The fears had increased a hundredfold
during the last couple of days, and now she was oppressed by the
possibility that she was expecting her husband's child.
'So you're engaged? Are you to be married soon?' The voice of Rona
cut into Renny's gloomy-thoughts and she looked across at her,
answering vaguely,
'Noernot soon --' And her eye caught that of her husband whose
expression, though unfathomable, seemed to convey to Renny that
there was very little about his wife that escaped him.
'How long are you here for?' Rona drew on her cigarette and blew the
smoke out in a, thin, uniform spiral that seemed to suit her manner of
sophistication.
'About a year ... or maybe not as long as that.'
'Not as long as that?' from Carl swiftly and Renny's eyes narrowed.
His surprise was feigned, she felt sure.
'It depends on circumstances.'
'Does it now? How interesting!' His tawny eyes flickered slowly from
her face to the firm soft curves of her breasts. 'Erwhat kind of
circumstances, Renny?' His voice was low and intimate. He appeared
to have forgotten the presence of the beautiful girl sitting opposite to
his wife.
Renny coloured and glanced away, painfully conscious of the curious
stare of Carl's ex-fiancee who, having picked up her glass, was
regarding Renny from over the top of it.
'The circumstances,' said Renny coolly, 'are not what I wish to talk
about.'
'Ah ... private?' Carl's mouth curved slightly. Renny could not tell if
his half-smile was one of sardonic amusement or satisfaction.
The conversation drifted then, on to inconsequential topics, though
with occasional questions from Rona who seemed very curious to
learn more about Renny. And when eventually Carl excused himself
for a moment on seeing a couple of friends of his at another table
some distance away, Rona made no attempt at tact as she said,
'How long have you and Carl known one another? I ask because there
seems to be something very familiar in the way you treat one another.'
Renny's eyes sparkled, and for one wild uncontrolled second she
almost blurted out the truth: that she and Carl were husband and wife.
However, she did manage to control her tongue and answered
casually,
'Some years, but we haven't been in touch. We met again just over
three weeks ago when my fiance and I came-to Singapore to work.'
'You work here too?' The girl looked a trifle surprised and was
diverted for the moment from what she had been going to say.
'I'm Gordon's secretary."
'Oh, I see. His secretary and his fiancee. How very nice.' The girl
paused and the silence between them became glacial. 'I expect it was
a surprise to you to bump into Carl,' she said eventually.
'Yes ...' Renny paused to think of something to say. 'As a matter of
fact, I knew he was living herewell, I had an idea he would be
living here.''You did? How? I mean, if you'd lost touch'
Renny stared, amazed by the girl's insistence which amounted almost
to rudeness.
'I'd always known that he had interests in Singaporethat his father
had left him hotels here, and in various other places in the Far East.'
'Then you must have known him intimately.' Rona's tone was
languid, but the expression in her vivid blue eyes was alert and
inquisitive. 'When did you first meet him? Was it in England?'
For a short, undecided moment Renny said nothing, but then, driven
by sheer malice and her dislike of the girl, she replied silkily,
'We met in London, eight years ago.'
'Eight years ..." To Renny's satisfaction the girl coloured slightly and
glanced with sudden concentration at the tip of her cigarette.
'Yes, it was eight years agoor just over. Carl wasn't too happy, I
remember --' Renny broke off, hesitating because she was admitting
that the completion of the sentence would undoubtedly brand her a
cat. However, she did complete it, saying, in that same smooth voice
of silk, ' ---because he'd been badly let down by some girl he was
engaged to.'
Rona stubbed out her cigarette in the ash tray, then immediately lit
another which she took from Carl's case which he had left lying on
the table.
'This girl... Did Carl not tell you her name?'
Renny looked directly into her eyes. - 'Why should he? She'd gone
out of his life and all he wanted to do was forget her.'
Rona's blue eyes fell beneath the stare of the beautiful brown ones.
She took up her glass and drained it.
'And you ... did you and Carl go out togetheror anything?'
Or anything ... Suddenly Renny wanted to laugh.
But more than that she wanted to say,
'We got married, and we're still married.' But instead she merely
remarked casually that they had lost touch after a short while.
*Yes, you've already told me.' Rona was frowning impatiently as she
continued, 'How did you come to meet? And now' She stopped as if
to consider and her frown deepened, detracting from her pale exotic
beauty. 'You appear to have something in common. What I mean is,
you don't act towards one another as strangers would.'
'But we aren't strangers,' returned Renny mildly.
"Well, -acquaintances, then. In three weeks you appear to have
greatly strengthened whatever relationship was between you before.'
Again Renny would have liked to voice her thoughts and to say,
'Indeed we have strengthened our relationship. We've consummated
our marriage.' But she murmured instead, her eyes fixing Rona's
again,
'For the past few minutes you've been asking all the questions. I'll
now ask you one. Why are you so interested in Carl and me?'
The girl's eyes glinted at this connecting of the two names, and her
voice had lost its alluring, softly-modulated tone as she replied,
'If you must know, Carl and I are practically engaged!'
'You are?' Jealousy, arrow-sharp and toxic, pierced Renny's heart
even while she knew that this was not could not betrue. But the
girl seemed so sure of herself, so confident. It seemed likely that she
had reason to be confident, and the only reason possible was the depth
of Carl's interest in her. But Carl had asked his wife to give their
marriage a trial --
'Sorry, girls, about leaving you --' Carl appeared and Renny's
confused thoughts were
1
interrupted. 'Have you been having a nice
friendly chat?' He glanced from one to the other as he sat down, but
his eyes were finally fixed on his wife's faintly-flushed face. 'I'm sure
you've been getting along fine,' he added slowly after a moment. 'And
now let's all have another drink!'

CHAPTER NINE
GORDON'S face was a study as he stared into Renny's clouded eyes.
They were in her room at the hotel, since she had decided that total
privacy was necessary for what she had to say to him. They had met
earlier and had dinner together, while Renny, very quiet and subdued,
gathered her courage and rehearsed what she would say. Gordon had
quickly sensed that something was seriously wrong but in deference
to her entreaty, he had contained his impatience and waited for the
privacy she said was imperative before she could speak what was in
her mind. She had wasted no time once they were in her room, and
now Gordon was standing by the couch, his eyes disbelieving and
furious, his forehead creased in a frown of dark censure.
'How could you?' he said, by no means for the first time. 'You
deceitful wretch! I'd hinted that there was something I didn't
understand! ' She shook her head wearily.
'I make no excuses, Gordon. Carl's personality was too strong-for
me --'
'Too strong!' he exploded. 'What kind of a girl are you, to surrender to
his persuasionsand while your fiance was away, too!'
She said nothing, dully aware that if he had not been away it would
never have happened, and she would not now be in this ghastly mess.
Gordon raved on and on, condemning her one moment and
reproaching her the next. But gt last his voice died down and he stood
staring at her across the width of the room. '
'I knew I must break the engagement,' she said, ending the silence at
last. 'It would have been better if I could have done so without making
the confession, but I had to produce some reason for my decision
toto finish with you.'
His eyes raked her scornfully. He had previously asked her if she and
Carl were intending to live together and she had answered no. But she
had not told him that Carl had asked her to give the marriage a trial
and as a result Gordon had swiftly concluded that Carl had merely
used her as a plaything and that now he no longer wanted her.
'What are your intentions?' he demanded harshly. 'I no longer want
you as my secretarybut you'll have realised that already.'
She nodded her head.
'Yes, I have,' she returned flatly.
'I suppose you will ask me for a testimonial,' Gordon said with a
sneer. 'Well, you'll never get onenever!'
She looked at him through eyes misted by tears.
'You've had your say, Gordonand I can't blame you for anything
you've said to me. I deserved it all. But will you please go now?'
His stormy gaze fixed hers until she averted her head. And then he
turned and without another word he strode from the room, slamming
the door behind him.
Renny .sat down on the couch, put her head in her hands and wept
bitterly. It seemed impossible that one short month ago she was
madly in love with Gordon, wanting only to be his wife. They had
both been so happy at the prospect of a year in Singapore, and then
marriage and a honeymoon, perhapsif Carl had agreed to a speedy
divorceon an exotic island somewhere around this part of the
world. All unknowing she-*had sought Carl out, not dreaming for
one moment that it was to be her downfall, that she would succumb to
the charms which, at that time, she didn't even know he possessed.
Well, she'd had her taste of romance, of physical bliss and the
glorious adventure of surrender, and now the reckoning, the return to
reality and perhaps the hardships of bringing up a child on her own.
Best to pack up and leave now, she decided, thinking of Rona and the
confident way in which she had said that she and Carl were almost
engaged. Perhaps Carl would now divorce his wife and marry his first
love. It wouldn't be the first time such a thing had happened.
She dried her eyes at last and began to get undressed. Sleepif she
could capture itwould be a temporary balm to her hurts, gathering
her into oblivion for a few soothing hours. Tomorrow, and daylight,
would bring their worries again --
She turned to the telephone as its ringing interrupted her dismal
mind-wanderings. She stared, un- moving, sure it must be Gordon.
Let it ring! She had no stomach for his renewed recriminations. True,
he had every excuse for them, but she'd had enough for one night.
At last there was silence, after what seemed an eternity. But no sooner
had she put on her nightdress and got into bed than a chambermaid
knocked and called to know if she was in. Renny frowned and
hesitated. The call came again, insistent and a little anxious.
Resignedly Renny slipped from between the cool sheets and donned a
neglige. The voice came again even as she opened the door.
'A message for you, Miss Colbertand I am to wait for an answer.'
The slant-eyed Chinese girl let her glance stray into the room. Renny
slid the door wider and invited her in.
'The gentleman said he had telephoned but there was no answer. I
hope you weren't disturbed from your sleep, Miss Colbert?'
'No, not at all ...' The envelope was slit open and Renny was reading
the contents of the single sheet of paper it contained.
'Gordon has been on to me by phone. I gather you've taken my
excellent advice and got rid of him. I tried to phone you and then
guessed you weren't in the mood for answering, in case it was your
ex-fiance. I want to come up. It's important, Renny, and I promise I'll
not take advantage of you. Carl.'
Renny looked at the girl.
'Tell the gentleman that I wasn't in,' she began, then realised that this
would not serve, simply because she had slit the envelope and could
not re-seal it to give back to the girl for delivery to Carl. 'ErI'll write
a note,' she amended, and sat down at the dressing- table. Using the
hotel's expensive notepaper she wrote,
'Some other time, Carl. It's half-past ten and I'm going to bed.'
The girl departed and Renny got back into bed. Five minutes later
Carl was at the door, demanding to be let in and threatening to
hammer on-the panels if she did not grant his request.
The neglige was put on again and she opened the door. Carl, as
impressive as ever, in evening dress, entered swiftly and closed the
door behind him, slipping the catch into place.
His eyes roved her lovely slender body and a smile lifted one corner
of his mouth. Why, oh, why was he so devastatingly attractive!
Renny felt weak at the knees, helpless to defend herself should he
tempt her again.
"Bo you realise that this is the first time I've seen you in a
nightgown?' he said. Renny glanced down and swiftly drew the edges
of her neglig together. Carl gave a soft laugh and moved past her
into the centre of the foom.
'What did Gordon have to say to you?' Carl looked around, eyed the
couch for a second before saying,
'Come and sit down. Ring the bell; we'll have something to sustain
us --'
'Why have you come?' Renny's face was pale, her small hands
clenched at her sides. She wondered if she looked as small and
defenceless and dejected as she felt.
Tor answer he strode over to the phone and ordered a bottle of wine.
'Sit down,' he invited again, but Renny shook her head.
1
'Afraid?
Haven't I promised not to force my attentions on you? Not that I ever
have forced you My dear, what's the matter?'
'I want youyou t-to go.'
His eyes flickered strangely.
'I believe you've been crying,' he said. 'Not for Gordon?'
'Naturally I've been upset," she shot at him, her anger rising at the
cool Way he was standing there, just as if he'd had nothing at all to do
with the misery she was going through. 'My lifemy whole
futureis ruined!'
'NonsenseAh, here comes our wine. I trust you'll have some, my
child. It'll do wonders for your blues.'
The boy entered after Carl had opened the door, Renny having
disappeared into the bathroom. She had a good mind to lock herself in
and let Carl go to the devil! She thought better of it, though, and
emerged as she heard the door close again.
Carl was pouring the wine; he handed her a glass and she took it, her
eyes meeting his before her expression was veiled by her thick dark
lashes. But with a totally unexpected movement Carl had his hand
beneath her chin and her head was forced up. He merely nodded, very
slowly, and released her again. She sat down in obedience to his
command, fully convinced that he would make her if she refused.
'And now,' he began, 'I want to know what Gordon said to you. He
sounded damned belligerent on the phone and I guessed he hadn't let
you off lightly. Did you have to tell him about us? You could have
given him up without that, you know.'
Renny nodded mechanically.
'I did think of itin fact, I suppose that was my original intention, but
then I saw that I'd have to give him some feasible explanation-' She
broke off and shivered. 'He waswas awful w-with mebut I
deserved it. I've broken his life as well as my own,' she ended on a
quivering sigh that was more like a sob.
'Nothing of the kind. You'd have made a bigger mess of his life if
you'd married, him and then discovered you didn't love himas you
were bound to have done.'
'You're glad, aren't you?'
'I admit it.' Carl took a drink of his wine and placed^ the glass on a
small table he had drawn up to the couch.
'You've had your revenge for what I did to you.'
Was it imagination or had he given a start at her use of the word
'revenge'?
'Drink your wine,' Carl ordered imperiously. 'It'll do you the world of
good.'
'Why have you come?' she asked him again.
'To find out what happened when you gave him up. As I said,' he
sounded belligerent, and furiously angry. 'I had to ring you to see how
you were.'
She looked at him as perception slowly dawned.
'You were afraid he'dhe'd done me somehurt?' Her pulses raced
absurdly at the idea that Carl had been worried about her.
'He was angry enough,' was Carl's grim rejoinder. 'It's not that I don't
own that you deserve a damned good hiding, but I'm not having any
other man giving you one!'
She coloured swiftly at the pointedness of his tautly- spoken words.
'You have no rights over me,' she said hotly. 'You seem to think you
have, but in a court of law you'd soon discover what rights you have!'
'Court of law?' With a slight lift of his eyebrows. 'Why mention a
thing like that?'
'The divorceit'll have to be- --'
'Is there going to be a divorce, Renny?' Soft the words and again her
pulses raced. Did he care? Was it her and not Rona he wanted? Afraid
of showing her feelings, she said spiritedly,
'Of course there is. Even though I'm not marrying Gordon I still want
my freedom, and I intend to have it.'
The hint of a smile touched the hard outline of her husband's mouth.
'I rather think,' he observed with slow deliberation, 'that you'll be far
more comfortable, in the months to come, if you have a husband
around.'
'You --! ' She turned away so swiftly that the wine in her glass spilled
over her attire and even splashed on to his. He took the glass from her
and put it on to the table.
'I guessed when we were in the Clipper Bar,' he told her, and she
recalled her own conviction that there was little her husband did not
know about her. 'And after all,' he added quietly, 'I did plan it, you
know.'
She cast him a glance of utter disdain.
'I remember your saying that such an eventuality would put an end to
my engagement,' she said in quivering tones. 'I hope you're satisfied!"
'More than satisfied,' he returned. 'I asked you to give our marriage a
trial. I'm asking you again, Renny.'
She made no answer and after a moment Carl asked if she intended to
sit in her wet clothes, or was she going to change them.
'I feel so unhappy that a little physical discomfort is nothing,' she
retorted. 'No, I'm not changingat least, not until you've left!'
She had not for one moment meant that as a challenge; she had
spoken pettishly, without the caution which she now knew she should
have practised. Carl rose at once and pulled her to her feet.
'Do you change or do I do it for you?' Low the tones but threatening.
Renny knew her husband far too well to defy him further. She
inclined her head meekly and said she would go into the bathroom
and change. 'The bathroom?' Carl's straight dark brows lifted a
fraction. 'Must you hide from your husband?' His mouth curved in a
smile of sheer amusement. 'There's nothing I haven't seen already, my
dear.'
Blushing hotly, she moved away, to search in the wardrobe for a
clean nightgown. She chose a matching set, very becoming but giving
more ample cover than the garments she was discarding. She went
into the bathroom and emerged a short while later in a full- length
satin housecoat, zipped right down the front and fitting at the waist,
then flowing in a way that seemed to accentuate the delicate contours
of her body. Carl regarded her through half-narrowed eyes, regarded
her with undisguised admiration ... and desire. Feathery ripples
travelling along her spine were all she needed to tell her that she was
as vulnerable to his dynamic personality as sh_e had ever been.
'Very alluring,' was his comment as she moved into the centre of the
room. 'You know, Renny, you're just as attractive when you're fully
coveredin fact, more so, I think. You're both winsome and
mysterious. Are you going to come and live with me as my wife?'
She looked at him, her face pale and beautiful, her big brown eyes
shadowed with anxiety and doubt. To live with him, without love...
'What you feel for me is only desire?' How cool she sounded to her
own ears I How uninterested in his feelings for her.
'We both feel desire for one another,' returned Carl quietly. 'I've
already said that this is enough. We can live amicably together --'
'There's more to marriage than sex!' she shot at him vehemently.
'How long will it last with nothing stronger between us than physical
attraction?'
'Depends on how strong the physical attraction.' He glanced around
and she saw his eyes fix momentarily on a huge, cut-glass ashtray.
'You can smoke if you wish,' she said.
'You don't mind?'
Renny shook her head. --
1

'No, I don't mind. The smoke won't hang.'
He took out a cigarette and set a match to it.
'You're a fool if you don't accept my offer,' he warned. 'A woman on
her own, bringing up a child, has many problems. And by that I don't
mean financial ones, because you won't have any of those. I shall
provide for you both generously. There are other problems, though,
especially if our child is a boy.'
'You seem very sure about mymy condition,' she said tartly.
'Aren't you, Renny?' he enquired softly.
'Not absolutely, no, not by any means. It's early days yet.' It was
strange, but she knew no embarrassment whatsoever at this
conversation, no aversion to talking to him as if she really were his
wife. Really were ... Silly to think otherwise, now that their
relationship had reached this stage. For if she were having a child,
then she felt she would be better off with Carl than on her own. It
wasn't as if she had any relative she could go back to in England.
There was only Clare who cared anything about her, and Clare had
written last week to say that she had met a nice young man and it
looked very much as if they would go steady.
'It's early days,' Carl was agreeing, 'but I feel very sure that we can
expect a child.' He looked-at her through a trail of smoke, his eyes
roving her lovely curves. He rose and she backed from him, what
little colour she had fading on the instant.
'Go away,' she ordered. 'Don't you dare come near me!'
'My dear girl, why the hysterics? I promised I wouldn't touch you if
you didn't want me to'
'Well, I don't want you to, so there!'
The last two words brought a quiver of amusement to his chiselled
mouth, and a hint of laughter to his eyes.
'You do want me to touch you,' he stated with quiet but undisguised
emphasis. 'You'd be mine within minutes if I were to tempt you.'
Anger rose within her, anger with herself as well as with him. He was
so right about her weakness ... and, so smug as well!
'It's late; please go, Carl.'
'You still haven't made a decision,' he reminded her,
'I'll wait a little while,' she said. 'After all, I'm not sure!"
He seemed to give a deep inward sigh, but his voice was light and
casual as he said,
'Very well, Renny, wait if you must.' He crushed the butt of his
cigarette in the ashtray. 'I'll phone you tomorrow evening. Are you
going into work in the morning?' --
'I don't really know-' She felt like weeping, now that he was leaving.
Yet she didn't want him to stay ... or did she?
'Didn't Gordon tell you what your position was?'
She shook her head.
'Nowethat is, there was no time' Renny stopped and spread
her hands. 'Gordon was too angry to think of anything but censuring
me, and reproaching m-me, andandoh, please go! I want to
sleep!' Tears had brightened her lovely eyes, and her whole body
shook as the memory of Gordon's bitter invective came to her all over
again. Carl made no attempt to comfort her but asked for a detailed
account of all that Gordon had said and done after she had made her
confession. Although she shook her head at first, ready to refuse, she
saw that he would make her give him a full account of what had
occurred> so she decided to give it willingly. His mouth tightened
and became grimmer and grimmer as she proceeded and she realised
that, whatever Carl's faults, he was wildly furious at the thought of
another man treating her with such lack of respect.
'I'll be seeing himand without delay!' he asserted when she had
finished speaking. 'If he isn't very careful he'll find himself out of a
job!'
'No, Carlplease don't do anything to punish him. You said yourself
that I deserved aa --' She stopped and rephrased her words. 'I did
wrong, Carl, as far as he was concerned. The fact that you're my
husband doesn't excuse my conduct because, after all, I was intending
to marry him.'
Carl frowned slightly and said nothing for a moment. And then,
'Don't go in to work in the morning. Ring through and say you're not
feeling too goodor would you like me to get through to the
manager?'
Renny shook her head.
'No, I'll do it myself.'
Carl looked at her, standing there, small and fragile- looking, her eyes
shadowed by anxiety. She saw his hand lift as if he intended to take
hold of one of hers and pull her to him. She took a step backwards and
his hand fell again, to his side.
'You'll not lose any pay,' he assured her. 'I'll see to that.'
'Thank you, Carl.'
'Buck up, child. It's not the end of the world.'
She had been thinking of tomorrow, of how it would drag, with her
having no company but her own. The thought was jostled from her
mind, however, by a spark of anger at the calm manner in which he
told her to 'buck up'.
'It's not so easy to shed one's dejection!' she flashed. 'It's all right for
youit always is for the man! How can I buck up, as you call it,
when my whole life's been disrupted like this!'
'Just you think of my offer,' was all her husband said to that. 'I'll
phone tomorrow evening as promised. I'd take you out to dinner, but
I've a date with Rona and her friends. We're dining at their home.'
Which meant, Renny supposed, that Carl was telling her he could not
possibly ask her to join them. A return of those stinging barbs of
jealousy brought the silent words to her lips.
'I'm his wife, but I'm left outand she takes my place!'
Aloud she said, 'You needn't phone me. I've already said I'm not
making a decision yet.'
He shrugged carelessly.
'What are you intending to do in the meantime?'
'I don't know ...' Her voice faltered and she had the greatest difficulty
in holding back the tears which threatened to fall. Rona was
occupying her thoughts still and the conviction came through that had
the girl not arrived on the scene then Carl would have given Renny
some of his time. As it was, he would probably be with the girl as
much as possible while her visit to Singapore lasted. 'I don't really
know.'
'You can't sit around doing nothing.' He paused, then said blandly,
'How long are you intending to give yourself?'
Renny blushed, naturally, and averted her head.
'About aa w-week,' she murmured.
'And then?'
'I'll consider your offer.'
He stood for a moment, silently regarding her bent head.
'You could come to me at once, you know.'
She looked up then, and said after a slight hesitation,
'And what about Rona? She won't be pleased if you stop taking her
out.'
No response for what seemed an eternity. Renny frowned in
puzzlement at her husband's strange but unfathomable expression.
When at last he spoke it was not in answer to her question, but to say
quietly,
r
'The New Year celebrations are beginning, as you know,
and I promised to take you out. I'll be in touch --'
'Will Rona be with us?' The question was deliberate; Renny was
suddenly determined to make him speak about the girl.
'She's spending the New Year in Malacca with friends she has there,
so she won't be with us.' He paused a moment, giving her the chance
to speak, but Renny had nothing to say and he went on, 'I think you'll
enjoy the celebrations. The Chinese New Year's always great fun.' He
moved as if to open the door.
'Goodnight, Renny. Sleep well --' He stopped and regarded her small,
drooping figure for a long moment, and in the silence she raised her
dark, anguished eyes to his. She had again been thinking of Rona,
telling herself that, had the girl not been going away to Malacca, then
Carl would not have asked Renny to go out with him to take part in
the celebrations. True, he had promised to do so, but Renny was
convinced that he would have preferred to take Rona. Pangs of
jealousy were even now shooting through her, affecting her
physically as well as mentally, for her heart seemed heavy within her,
heavy and hurting and beating far too quickly. She had asked herself
many times of late whether she was in love with her husband, and
now she had the answer. For once again she was remembering the
truism that where there was jealousy there must be love.
And she was filled with a fierce, all-consuming jealousy of the girl
her husband had once loved.
She heard Carl's- calm voice saying,
'I'm going to break my promise, Renny ---' And before she could
grasp his intention she was drawn into his arms. 'I shall kiss you at
least!' His mouth was hard and masterful and she had no strength to
resist. She quivered convulsively as his body closed against hers,
hard and virile and demanding.
'Carl.. .'please ...'
'Pleasewhat, my sweet? What are you asking me?' His lips were on
her throat, then her shoulder as he moved the collar of her
dressing-gown. Renny closed her eyes tightly, every nerve sensitive
to the deliberate temptation of his kisses and the touch of his hands,
warm and insistent even through the material of her clothing. 'I'll
oblige willingly if it's love you want.'
He was laughing at her. She wondered if, should she decide to live
with him, he would always laugh at her in this humiliating way. She
was his plaything, nothing morehis plaything just as Gordon had so
contemptuously assumed her to be.
'Please go,' she said tautly, managing to conjure up a modicum of
pride.
'You really want want me to go?' His arms were imprisoning her and
they tightened as she tried to twist herself out of them.
'IIy-yes...'
He leant away, his eyes alight with amusement.
'A truthful answer, Renny, please.' The tone was edged with humour,
but there was an order in its depths.
She thought about her doubts regarding her condition. If she wasn't
expecting a baby then why take another risk?
'This time,' she was able to say to him, 'sanity prevails. I am giving
you an honest answer when I say I really want you to go.'
Her husband frowned in disbelief.
'You little liar...' His voice faded as he read her expression, 'Ah, I see
... Goodnight, then, Little Miss Caution!'
She watched him open the door, heard him bid her good night again
and then add with that edge of amusement to his voice,
'It's a little late for caution, Renny, but have it your own way. You
know best what you want.'
She saw his laughing eyes rove her figure and couldn't resist the sharp
retort,
'You're so confident! What a blow to your ego if you've not
succeeded in what you planned!'
He was frowning on the instant. It gave Renny intense satisfaction to
see the change in his expression. He was certainly not laughing now.
'Goodnight,' he said even yet again, in an abrupt voice this time, and
when he closed the door it was with rather more noise than was
necessary.

CHAPTER TEN
THE decorations and billboards topping the city's vast supermarkets
and departmental stores had their special days at last. New Year's Day
fell on the thirty-first of January and the festivities continued into the
middle of February, with feasting, street parades and operas, parties
and dances and numerous other entertainments. In every household
preparations had been going on for a week or more before New Year's
Day, with cleaning and scrubbing and the getting in of food for the
coming feasts, and this food all had to be precooked as no one must
cook on the special day. The Kitchen God had been sent on his way to
heaven to make his report on the doings of the household to which he
belonged; all debts had to be settled, and there must be no borrowing
or lending during the first fortnight of the New Year. On New Year's
Eve there was a ceremony to celebrate the return from heaven of the
Kitchen God, who always received a hearty welcome from the
members of the household under his care.
During the celebrations many people wore their best, and brightest
clothes when going out to join in the - fun, and children especially
were dressed in new clothes, for the receiving of their ang pows,
which were gifts of money contained in bright red envelopes. These
gifts also went to unmarried relatives and servants.
'The ang pow coins or paper money must always be in even numbers,'
explained Carl who, true to his promise, had called for Renny each
day and taken her out to join in the festivities. 'This means that even a
gift of a dollar must have a coin with it to make the total two instead
of one.'
'It's unlucky to give an odd number?'
Carl nodded. ' 'Very. No one would give an odd number.'
Renny was enthralled with all she was witnessing. Her nights had
been troubled, as she was fast becoming resigned to the fact that she
was having a child, but the days with their tropical temperatures and
sunshine, their gaiety and variety, and the long and happy hours she
spent in the company of her husband seemed always to obliterate the
brooding melancholy of the nights. On the first outing Carl had taken
her to the home of a Chinese friend, Freddie Lien, who was, in the
traditional manner, holding 'open house' for everyone. His home was
gaily decorated outside with bright crimson scrolls inscribed with
Chinese characters in gold.
"They're proverbs,' Carl told her and, with his fluent command of the
language, he translated one for her, explaining that it meant the birth
of a new span of life and the arrival of a new year.
'The Chinese New Year is by far the most important of all the
festivals in Singapore,' he told her. 'It's a time of mad merrymaking
when the good-luck colour of red splashes the entire city.'
'I've never seen anything like it, not even on a film!
I'm very lucky to be here --' She stopped, a terrible despair flooding
over her for a second or two. Why did
y
she have to be enduring this
nagging suspense at this time, when she could be giving herself up
entirely to the pleasures offered?
"What is it, Renny?' They were about to enter his friend's house, but
Carl stopped, looking down into his wife's face as she abruptly halted
her words.
'Nothing. IIoh, take no notice, Carl!' She managed to throw off
her dejection and to produce a smile. 'Tell me about these sticks of
sugar-cane by the doorway. I noticed that* many houses have them
standing near their doors.'
'They're to keep the evil spirits from coming in with us when we go
in. They try, but they're thwarted by the sugar-cane.'
'What strange beliefs!'
'Strange to you, but not to them.'
'No...'
Mr Freddie Lien was small and round and smiling. It was plain that he
was rich, as his home was luxurious in every way. Carl and Renny
were to have a meal, and had discarded their shoes at the door. Not
that Europeans were expected to adhere to this Chinese custom, but
Carl had told Renny that it was considerate to their host to do so. Carl
had also brought mandarin oranges to exchange with those that
Freddie had to offer. These oranges had to be in even numbers;
usually, pairs.
Freddie's wife was round and homely, with a mass of gorgeous jet
black hair and the sort of smile that made her look far younger than
she was. The children, a boy aged eight and a girl of five, were gaily
dressed in trouser suits, obviously brand new. They received Carl's
ang pows with thanks and went off to open the / envelopes.
During the conversation which accompanied the meal Renny learned
of the custom of hiding all the brooms'" from sight in order to avoid
the disaster of anyone sweeping away the New Year's good luck.
'We also hide all our kitchen knives and scissors,' Mrs Lien informed
Renny. 'It would be terrible if someone accidentally cut the threads of
good fortune.'
'We had such a party last night,' said Freddie, changing the subject.
'Every one of our relatives turned up!'
'It must have been fun,' said Carl. There was nothing of the stern
harsh man about him now. On the contrary, he was the charming
guest, able to produce a smile for everyone and, Renny noticed with
interest, he was particularly good with the children, both of whom
knew him well and obviously liked him very much indeed.
'Yes, it was fun,' agreed Freddie. He looked at Renny. 'We always
have a big party on New Year's Eve,' he said just for her benefit, 'and
then we throw open all the doors and windowsit's warm at night, as
you knowto let in all the good spirits who might happen to be
around or passing by. Toasts are proposed and we say, "Yam song!"
which means, "Let's drink to success in the New Year".' He stopped
and laughed. 'That's its literal meaning, but it's the equivalent of,
"Bottoms up! " '
This brought laughter, then a small silence followed while they all
concentrated on the delicacies before them. There was salted duck,
Chinese sausages and pork satay, titbits of tim-sum, and in the centre
of the table a huge dish of fruit and dried melon seeds, nuts and
assorted sweetmeats.
At last if was time for Renny and Carl to leave. The family
accompanied them to the door.
'Kong hee fat choy!' said the children in unison. 'Kong hee fat choy to
you too!' Carl stooped
-
to ruffle the children's hair in turn. 'Goodbye,
Freddie and Janet. Thank you for a lovely meal. May your health
increase!'
Renny felt shy and merely wished them a happy New Year. But Carl
teased her into using the Chinese greeting and eventually she was
saying, ' 'Kong hee fat choy!'

The following day she and Carl spent in the streets watching the street
opera and going on from there to watch the fascinating spectacle of a
Lion Dance being performed. They then joined another group of
merrymakers who were laughing and clapping as they watched a
'dragon' climb to a second-floor window to collect his ang pow. Carl
took her to Chinatown and they watched a colourful Dragon Dance.
Much later they were watching another Dragon Dance, this time at
the Mandarin, where they had dined in the Neptune
theatre-restaurant. The management had put on a show including the
spectacular Dragon Dance, this latter to 'bless their guests with good
luck and fortune'. Renny had been very hesitant indeed about dining
at the Mandarin with Carl, feeling sure they would bump into
Gordon, but her husband calmly told her. that Gordon was no longer
at the Mandarin. He had had him transferred to an hotel some distance
" away. Renny had felt awful about this until Carl assured her that
Gordon had told the manager of his- firm that, if he hadn't been
moved from the Mandarin he had intended asking for a transfer
himself. It was natural, she admitted, that he would not wish to risk
coming across her, which was likely, even in so vast a hotel as the
Mandarin.
After the performance of the Dragon Dance came the charming
ceremony of mandarin oranges and ang pows being given away by
the hotel's hostesses.
'Have you had fun?' Carl asked when they had left the restaurant and
were having a last quiet drink in this Clipper Bar.
'I've had a marvellous time! Thank you, Carl, for taking me to see all
these fascinating things.'
He glanced at her enigmatically as he lifted his glass to his-lips.
'It could always be like thisnot the New Year, of course, but your
life could be very different from what you've been accustomed to.'
She was silent, a flash of memory bringing back Glare's remark that
she could have been having the good life all these years. But there
was more to living and to happiness than the things money could buy.
In fact, it was the things that money could not buy which were by far
the most precious. Carl had no love for her and so Renny could not
contemplate a future with him. It was admitted that she would be
better off with him than on her ownif she did happen to be
expecting a child, that was, but even so she did not think she would
accept his offer.
She had made more than enough mistakes in her life already, without
plunging headlong into the worst mistake of allentering into
marriage where her love for her husband would never be returned.
His voice drifted into her thoughts; she looked" at him as she listened,
unaware that ,the sadness in her heart was reflected in her eyes.
'If you came to me then your home would be at the Zephyr, but I have
a rather picturesque housetermed a week-end cottagein a
coconut grove in the south. A nice crowd gather at the week-ends and
we have barbecues and picnics on the beach at night, under the palms.
Some of us have tennis courts and swimming- pools. You and I could
get away most week-endsand in fact stay longer if we liked.'
She shook her head, frowning.
'It's all very tempting, but'
'But what?'
She shook her head again.
'It's very late, Carl, and I've had a tiring day. I'm going to bed.'
He glanced at his watch.
'You're right, it is late. I'll see you to your room and then go. I'll come
for you tomorrow; all right?'
Renny produced a faint smile and said yes, it would be all right.
'Where are we going?'
'I'll take you to one or two Chinese temples. They're charmingly
decorated at this time of the year, and the various ceremonies are
fascinating to watch. In the evening we'll dine at the Zephyr --'
'The Zephyr? You meanin your penthouse?'
The hint of a smile lifted one side of her husband's mouth.
'Afraid of dining in the privacy of my sitting-room?'
Renny coloured slightly.
'I prefer a restaurant,' she admitted.
'In that case, we shall dine in a restaurantor rather, in the open air.
At the Zephyr we're putting on something special as part of our New
Year celebrations. A barbecue by the pool, beneath the palms and in
the light from hundreds of coloured fairy lamps in the trees' He
paused to regard her in some amusement for a space. 'Romantic
enough for you, my dear?'
She averted her head, wishing he were not so scornful about romance.
'This something specialis it just the barbecue?'
'No, there's a spectacular show as well, with Chinese, Malay and
Indian dances. And after that you and I can dance if we like, in the
ballroom."
'I expect I shall have had enough.'
'Scared of dancing with me?'
Renny's eyes took on an angry sparkle.
'How sure of yourself you are!' Carl merely shrugged lightly and she
added, as the thought occurred to her, 'So you never intended us to
dine in your penthouse?'
'No, Renny, not with you feeling the way you do.'
Was he laughing at her again ... or could it be that he did not want her
to be with him in an intimate situation? Perhaps already he was
becoming indifferent to her, losing interest because, the day after
tomorrow, Rona would be returning from Malacca, and she was to
take up residence at the Zephyr as Carl's guest. Carl had mentioned
this casually and once again the poison barbs of jealousy had pierced
Renny's heart.

Rona reclined gracefully Jn a long low garden chair : and fixed
Renny's brown eyes with hers. She had just
;
been speaking, asking
about Gordon and evincing a great amount of curiosity as to how
Renny came to be here, in the gardens of the Zephyr, instead of being
at work. Renny had chosen to ignore some of the girl's questions, but
Rona was persistent.
'Doesn't Gordon need you all the time? It's very strange, to my way of
thinking, that he can do without his secretary.'
'I just happen to be having a day off,' said Renny with undisguised
impatience. She was beginning to regret having accepted Carl's
invitation to take afternoon tea with him and Rona. At the time, when
he ; had phoned, it Was a refusal that had leapt to her lips, but some
imp of mischief convinced her that Rona would hate the idea of
sharing Carl's company, so Renny had thanked Carl for his invitation
and said she was happy to accept it.
The reason for his invitation puzzled her, and the only explanation
that came to her was that he felt sorry for her in her loneliness and
unease of mind and had decided that the break would relieve the
monotony of her present existence.
'It must be nice to be able to have a day off when you want.' Rona's
voice was silky, her lovely eyes narrowed to hide her expression.
'Carl obviously knew you wouldn't be at work.'
'Obviously.' Renny glanced towards the fountain and the
flower-draped archway beyond, and wishedCarl had not been called
away to the office, leaving her alone with the girl she detested almost
to the point of actual hatred. Here she was, perfectly at home in Carl's
hotel, staying as his guest in one of the most expensive suitesoh,
yes, Rona had been quick to mention this, within seconds of Carl's
having been called away.
'I'm intrigued by your relationship with Carl.' Rona was plainly
intending to persist in spite of Renny's very obvious reluctance to
answer her questions. 'I did remind you,' went on Rona when she saw
that no comment was forthcoming, 'that Carl and I are practically
engaged.'
Renny looked at her.
'Have you any special reason for reminding me?' she asked, her
interest caught now, as it was bound to be.
'It was a warning,' answered Rona blandly. 'A warning to keep your
mind on your own fiance and not mine.'
A little gasp of incredulity escaped from Renny's lips.
'You're certainly outspoken,' she said. 'Are you usually in the habit of
speaking your mind like this?'
Rona reached languidly for her handbag and opened it, extracting a
gold cigarette case and a matching lighter.
'Plain speaking is necessary sometimes,' she returned smoothly. 'It's
very obvious that you've been flirting with Carl...' The girl's voice
trailed as her glance caught the faint rise of colour in Renny's cheeks.
'You blush, eh? An admission that you have been flirting with him!'
The voice was rasping now and the hand holding the cigarette
trembled as anger took possession of ite owner. Renny, still aware of
her heightened colour, could not help wondering what Rona's
reaction would be if she were to inform her that the 'flirting' she had
mentioned had gone far deeper than that! 'You haven't a chance with
him,' went on Rona after flicking a light to her cigarette. 'He's in love
with me! And you wouldn't like to lose Gordon for nothing, would
you?'
For a moment Renny could not speak for the ball of anger that had
settled in her throat. But at length she was able to say, marvelling at
the lack of emotion in her voice,
'Just what do you mean by that?'
Rona's blue eyes were pools of ice as she replied,
'I might have to warn him that he ought to keep an eye on his fiancee.
I know where you both work, remember, so there'd be no difficulty in
my getting in , touch with him.' Smooth words, and deliberate. Renny
gasped again, but she herself was now ready to give as much as she
received.
'Warn him by all means,' she said challengingly, at the same time
wondering what the girl would have to say were she to tell her that the
engagement was broken anyway. 'And I hope it will give you the
satisfaction you expect;'
The other girl was eyeing her suspiciously. She said in a curious tone
of voice,
'You don't seem very perturbed by my threat.'
'I'm not in the least perturbed.'
'You don't care if you lose your fiance?' Rona drew on her cigarette
and inhaled deeply.
It was now on the tip of Renny's tongue to tell the girl about the
broken engagement, but she refrained without quite, knowing the
reason for her silence.
'I think this conversation has gone far enough,' she said decisively.
'Shall we change the subject?'
Rona's eyes glinted, and an arctic chill entered the silence that fell
between the two girls. Rona seemed to be considering and at last it
was she who put an end to the silence by saying, slowly and
deliberately,
'You don't believe me when I say that Carl and I are practically
engaged, do you?'
'No, as a matter of fact, I don't,' replied Renny without a moment's
hesitation.
'The wish is father to the thought, eh? I firmly believe that you'd do
anything to get Carl. Perhaps you've been after him before, when you
first metI don't know and neither do I care. Your engagement
doesn't appear to be very important to you. It certainly hasn't stopped
you flirting with Carl, has it?' A pause followed, but Renny had not
the patience to speak. If Carl didn't return soon then she would be
very tempted to get up and leave. 'Whatever you might think to the
contrary,' Rona was saying, 'Carl has given me to understand that his
feelings for me are serious and that he hopes I feel the. same about
him.'
Renny looked at her, puzzled by her expression, for there was nothing
veiled about it, which would surely be the case if Rona were lying.
'Yet she must be lying,' Renny said to herself. 'Carl's asked me to live
with him as his wife, so it isn't possible that he would be serious with
another girl.'
He returned at that moment and took possession of the chair he had
recently vacated.
'Tea will be along in a few minutes,' he told them, his shrewd eyes
moving from one to the other. He made no comment that would
reveal his thoughts and conclusions, but Renny, watching him
intently, knew for sure that he had guessed-there had been some
friction between his guests while he was away.
Tea was served on the garden terrace, in an atmosphere of quiet
elegance and the soft strains of a violin being played by a young
Malayan boy standing by the fountain. Rona was very
quietstrangely soas she kept on allowing her glance to move
from Carl's inscrutable face to Renny's. What was she thinking
about? wondered Renny. The girl was deep, very deep...

A week later Renny rang her husband and said she would accept his
offer and live with him as his wife. It had been a difficult decision,
changed a dozen times or more. And even now that it was made she
wasn't sure that it was the right one or not. She freely admitted that
she had been influenced firstly by her condition, , . and secondly by
her burning jealousy of Rona; Fear too had come into it, as she came
near to convincing herself that if she did not go to Carl then he would
turn his whole attention to Rona ... Rona who had spoken with such
confidence when she said that Carl had given her to understand that
his feelings for her were serious.
The thought of Carl's divorcing her to marry Rona was an eventuality
which Renny could not even bear to think about.
'So you made a decision at last.' Carl spoke quietly, but the intense
satisfaction which her answer had given him came through to her
clearly. 'You'll come straight away?'
'There isn't any point in staying here,' she answered flatly.
A small silence followed before her husband spoke.
'You don't sound too happy, my dear. Something wrong?'
She gave a small sigh, as her doubts returned. She had somehow
expected her husband to be a kittle less casual than he was.
'I suppose I'm not one hundred per cent happy,' she was honest
enough to admit.
'Because of the baby?'
'No, not thatwell, not that in itself. It's the fact that it's influenced
my decision that really troubles me.'
Again a silence, longer this time until Renny began to wonder if
something was wrong with the telephone. However, Carl's voice
came through eventually and she heard him say, in a toneless sort of
voice,
'Did nothing else influence your decision, Renny?'
What did he mean? Had he guessed that she feared he might turn to
Rona? Swiftly she replied,
'No, what else could have influenced me?'
A low laugh was his only response at first.
'There could be something else, but we'll not pursue the matter. I'll
call and collect you and your luggage at about four this afternoon.'
'We're living at the Zephyr?'
'Where else? Don't you like my penthouse?'
'Yes, it's very nice.'
To live in a penthouse high above the city ... She and Gordon had
planned to live in a thatched cottage in the country where she could
keep a couple of dogs and perhaps a pony.
'However,' she heard Carl saying, 'we won't be here tonight. I'll take
you down to Ghuan Cottage for a few days. How will you like that?'
'Oh, very much, Carl,' she answered, brightening. 'It'll be nice and
quiet.'
'For a honeymoon? Well, I'd hardly agree that it's our honeymoon, not
with things as they are. However, I feel you'll be very happy down
there, my dear.'
Renfty- frowned as she replaced the receiver. There Was something
about Carl's manner that she could not fathom. It was not merely that
he'd been a little cynical about the idea of a honeymoon. No, that she
would have expected ... but there was something else, something that
brought warning flashes to her brain... '
She was far from happy as she began to pack her several suitcases.
She had no confidence in the future, no hope in her heart that this step
she was taking would lead her to happiness. An icy chill swept over
her and she rang down for a pot of coffee. Her hand shook as she
drank it and she sat down, half inclined to ring her husband again and
tell him she had changed her mind. But with grim determination she
threw off the temptation and continued with her packing, all the time
going over the times she had had with Carl and admitting that,
whatever her doubts at this moment, she was longing for the moment
when, in the intimacy of their bedroom, her own reciprocal passion to
Carl's lovemaking would bring her joys untold.
The cottage was delightful, set as Carl had said in a coconut grove but
with immaculate gardens, a swimming-pool and a tennis court. There
were verandahs, patios, sunken flower beds and a shady courtyard
where a fountain played in the centre and on the mellowed wall
bougainvillaea tumbled in a riot of peach and pink and glorious
magenta. Carl had described it as they drove .down in his car, Renny's
suitcases in the boot. He had. told her about the gardener, who was
also the caretaker, living in a little self-contained hut in the shade of
the palms at the far end of the grove. Lucie was the Chinese maid who
came in when Carl was in residence, Renny began to feel happier and
by the time they arrived and she had taken a look around, she felt she
had exaggerated those doubts that had entered her mind after her
phone call to Carl.
He was all charm, and enticement. Dinner was a superb meal, and
afterwards Carl took her walking along the beach.
She mentioned the other people who had houses eresome of
which were close to the beach like his, and some of which clung to
the hillsides or lay on little . plateaus cut into the slopes.
"These people are going to be surprised that you have a wife, aren't
they? How will you explain?'
To her surprise he made no answer, but changed the subject instead.
She brought up the matter again when they were back in the cottage
and the same thing happened: Carl swung the subject on to other
lines. Her misgivings returned, to be intensified when, at bedtime, he
said he was sure she was tired and therefore she would prefer to sleep
alone. He seemed genuine in his concern for her, and his goodnight
kiss was gentle to the point of real tenderness.
'Carl... I...' How did a wife convey to her husband that she wanted
him? Renny's disappointment was so great that she felt he must know
instinctively how much she wanted him.
'Yes, my dear?'
Was there mockery in those tawny eyes? Renny felt the prick of tears
in her own and turned away from him.
'It was nothing. You're right, Carl, I am rather tired. Goodnight.'
He left her, going from the room with its beautiful furnishings and
expensive drapes and carpet ... and a huge double bed, canopied and
covered with a Chinese embroidered spread in red and gold satin.
The following morning he greeted her with a smile. Her heart
fluttered .and she thought: why does he have to be so attractive when
he smiles at me like that?
'Have a good night, Renny?' he asked". He had been for an early
morning swim in the sea and he wore a towelling robe in bright
orange with black trimmings. A large brightly-coloured towel was
slung over one arm and in his other hand he held a cigarette.
'Very good, thank you, Carl.' She felt shy and awkward and as unsure
of herself as on the day he married her at the age of eighteen.
It was over breakfast that he mentioned Rona. The. previous day
Renny had mentioned her, asking if she would remain at the Zephyr
now that he was coming to the cottage. He had said that Rona had
gone on a full day's trip and would not be back until late that night. He
had left a message for her, but he did not say what the message was.
He sounded curt, his manner uncommunicative, and Renny had
decided not to ask . him any more questions about the girl. He was
aware of. course that Renny knew who Rona wasthe girl who had
once been engaged to him.
'Rona phoned me late last night.' He was pouring ^ coffee and he
handed Renny hers across the table. His voice had a toneless quality
as he added, 'She was surprised of course that I'd left, but I told her I'd
brought you here in the note I left for her.' Carl seemed fully absorbed
in his task for the next moment or two and Renny waited with keen
interest for him to continue. She was only human and it therefore^
gave her some considerable satisfaction to picture Rona's reaction on
receiving a note like that.
'You told her we were married?' Even as she asked the question
Renny was surprising herself by answering itin the negative!
'No, I haven't mentioned it,' he replied casually. 'She's coming down
later today, so I shall tell her then.'
So cool! So offhand about the whole affair! Renny stared at him, but
he was busy sugaring his coffee and - after that he picked up the
cream jug and poured some of its contents into his cup. And all the
while he never raised his eyes to hers.
'I don't care to have Rona here,' she said at last.
'I had to invite her, Renny. She's my guest at the Zephyr, as you
know, and it isn't as if she can go back to her friends. They're on
holiday for a week and won't be back until Friday, so Rona will stay
here until then.'
A frown creased Renny's wide forehead.'I find it strange, Carl, that
you can be so friendly with someone who let you down as badly as
she did --' Renny broke off even before her husband's brows had shot
up.
'I'm friendly enough with you,' he said, 'and you let me down even
more badly.'
Renny had been buttering toast, but she stopped, the knife becoming
idle in her hand. She disliked intensely her husband's expression; his
eyes seemed to be glittering, tiger-like, and his mouth was tight....
ruthless and implacable.
'Carl,' she faltered, laying down her knife on the plate, 'you're ...
different, somehow.'
'Different from when you met me? Yes, Renny, very different. You
must never delude yourself that your husband will ever be that soft
with you again. You've come to me and I intend to school or rebuke
you when I feel it's necessary. Just now it was very necessary to
remind you of what you did.'
She looked down at her plate, forced to admit that she had deserved
the rebuke.
'I wish Rona wasn't coming here,' she just had to say presently. 'We
don't like one anotherbut you've guessed that, haven't you?'
He nodded his head.
'I asked you if anything else had influenced you in your decision to
come to me, remember?'
'Yes, I remember,' she answered, knowing what he was about to say.
'Jealousy of Rona influenced you in part, didn't it?'
'Yes, I suppose I must admit it.'
'At least you're honest.' He looked at the knife and the partly-buttered
piece of toast. 'Get your breakfast, Renny, and we'll go for a long
walk on the beach.'
It was a fresh and heady breeze that blew in from the south, tousling
Renny's hair and bringing a rosy flush to her cheeks. Carl remarked
on her appearance several times and his flattery went to her head like
a potent wine. She has happy, having forgotten her embarrassment at
the breakfast table when, owing to her slip when speaking of Rona,
she had brought down Carl's censure on her head.
Now and then her thoughts went to Gordon and she wondered if he
would continue with the job here or return to England. She felt guilty
but knew now that she would never have made him happy. Her
destiny was with Carl, the man who had saved her life at very great
risk to his Own.
His arm strayed around her waist as they turned to walk back, and
later when they arrived back at the cottage he took her to him and
kissed her tenderly on the lips. '
Rona arrived during the afternoon and the moment Renny set eyes on
her she knew there was to be some unpleasantness. Carl had gone
over to the tennis court with the gardener who had asked his advice
about the renewal of some of the netting, so Renny was on her own in
the garden sunbathing when the taxi arrived and Rona got out. The
driver took her suitcase from the back of the car and placed it on the
step. Renny saw Rona pay him, then turn, her eyes brilliant with fury
as they met Renny's.
'Where's Carl?' she demanded, and it was clear that -she would, not be
able to control her temper much longer, 'Youhow do you come to
be here? I might as well tell you, miss, that I've been trying all the
morning to get your fiance on the telephone! If I'd been able to get
him he'd probably be here with me now!' Rona glanced all around.
'Where's Carl?' she said again. 'I want to know what you're doing
herealone with him --'
'Carl is coming now,' interrupted Renny quietly, lifting a hand to
point. Carl was striding across the lawn, an odd expression on his lean
bronzed face.
'So you arrived safely. Lucie will show you to your room'
'Carl, why is thisthis woman here? She's supposed to be working,
and she's also supposed to be engaged to her boss!'
'Renny is my wife, Rona.' Carl spoke softly, but to Renny's alert ears
there was something terrible in the guttural undertone she heard. 'We
were married some years ago, but we became estranged afterwards.
We met again here and I managed to persuade her'
'Yourwife!' Rona found her voice at last. It was harsh and choked
and disbelieving all at the same time. 'Your wife...' She shook her
head as if to discard what she already knew to be the truth. 'When
were you married?' she wanted to know.
'Eight years ago, Rona,' answered Carl in the same soft tone, 'just
after you'd jilted me for someone else.'
Renny, fascinated by her husband's manner, was remembering that
thread of an idea that had come to herthe idea that Carl might be
planning a revenge ... Was this it? So many questions to follow if this
was revenge, questions that Renny could not bear to ask herself,
because she feared that Carl had some form of revenge planned for
her as well.
'You two have been married for eight years?' Rona's mouth twisted
out of all recognition. It Was plain that she was suffering* plain too
that she had spoken only the truth when she said that Carl had led her
to believe his feelings for her were serious. Yes, this was his revenge!
Renny had no doubts now, and her fear rose to suffocate her, for she
knew that her husband meant to subject her to the same suffering
which he was inflicting on his old flame.
'Yes, Rona, we've been married for eight years.'
'Why, then, did you lead me on?' Rona flung the question at him in
venomous tones. She was like someone demented, thought Renny,
and decided that when her turn came she would show a dignity that
would rob her husband of at least some of his satisfaction. 'You
hateful, heartless creature!' She had forgotten the presence of Renny
as she continued to fling insults at him. 'You did lead me on! You
gave me to understand that you'd ask me to marry you! And you were
already married! I hate youhate you!' Rona burst into angry tears
and turned away.
Renny looked at Carl, straight into his eyes. His face was impassive,
totally without pity for the girl who was weeping bitter tears. Renny
remembered the gentle compassionate man she had married, the
youth who had never yet been touched by the cruel knocks that the
world could give. And she wanted to weep herself, weep for what she
had lost in running out on him. 'I wish you joy of him!' Rona's voice
rose to a shrill crescendo as she added, 'If he married you eight years
ago then it was on the rebound, and such a marriage can never be a
success!' She glanced around wildly. 'Get me a taxi!' she shouted,
glaring at Carl. 'The sooner I leave this place the better I shall like it!'
'I'll phone for one for you,' offered Carl, turning away after raking
Rona's figure in disgust. Renny watched him stride across the rest of
the lawn and enter the house. So cool and calculating he was! His
revenge had been complete, with Rona's blind fury unleashed to
disgrace her totally in his eyes, and her misery the reward he had
schemed for.
The taxi arrived and Rona left Chuan Cottage less than twenty
minutes after having got there. Renny had gone into the house and up
to the room she had occupied last night. Her future looked black, but
she would rise in the end. She had her childfiercely she claimed it
as her own. Carl should never take it from herno, nor would he ever
have access to it if she could help it! She would be in England,
thousands of miles away.
She was packing the one suitcase she had opened when her husband
entered the room. She continued with what she was doing but said
over her shoulder,
'It's my turn now, isn't it?'
No answer for a space and then,
'I planned to punish you both. I'd been leading Rona on for some time,
waiting until she fell in love with me, and then I intended to laugh in
her face and tell her to get to h to get out of it and never come back.
Then you appeared right out of the blue and it seemed that fate had
taken a hand and that I was to be given the chance of punishing you
both. I planned to take youand I'd have done it even if it had meant
carrying you off by force, bringing you down here where you'd be
completely in my power. I always believed I hated you, and I hated
you when first I saw you that day in the lobby of the Zephyr. I'd give
you a child and then cast you off, but not until I'd had my revenge on
Rona, as I had it just now.'
'I hope it afforded you the satisfaction you wanted.' Renny spoke
when he paused, but she did not turn as she continued to fold the
articles of clothing she had laid on the bed in readiness for packing.
She was pale, and icy cold; she waited for the final act in the drama,
when her husband would tell her categorically that he was casting her
off.
'I thought I knew myself,' Carl went on, ignoring what his wife had
said. 'I believed I was hard, ruthless enough to carry my revenge
through to the bitter end, to make you suffer, to cry. I asked you to say
you loved me, hoping that you really would fall in love with me,
because then my revenge would indeed have been sweeter than I had
at first expected it to be. Even up till today I fought against the truth,
determined to have the revenge I'd set my mind on.' He stopped again
and waited. The long silence became so tense that Renny turned, and
he saw that her face was white and her eyes misted with tears.
'Thethe tr-truth...' Her voice faltered. She dared pot complete what
she had intended to say, dared not ask him what the truth was.
'Renny, my love...' His voice too faltered, brought to a stop by the
emotion that filled him. 'I found myself falling in love with you
almost from the first- falling in love when I was determined to hate
you. My pride had suffered hellishly when you ran out on me so soon
after I'd been jilted, and I despised myself for my weakness in loving
you. I didn't want love anyway; I was content with my life as it was.'
He paused, but made no move to touch her. His eyes rested for a
moment on the blouse she was crushing in her fingers all
unknowingly. 'As I said, even today I fought --'
'Last night,' she broke in gently. 'Last night you fought?'
'It was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. I wanted you, in
love this time, Renny, and yet I remained stubbornly determined to
see you suffer. This in face of the fact that it had already begun to
dawn on me that life without you would be aimless, empty,
unbearable.' He did come to her then, and took the , blouse from her
unresisting hands. 'You see, my darling, you were my life, my all, and
you'll remain so for ever.'
A silence fell between them, broken only by the twitter of a bird
outside the window. Carl was holding her hands in his, his gaze
tender and yet begging for forgiveness. It hurt, somehow, to see him
contrite, and Renny said emotionally,
'It was all my fault in the beginning, Carl. I hurt youoh, how I hurt
you!' The tears were bright in her eyes and she blinked rapidly. 'I
wanted to ask your forgiveness when I first saw you,' she went on
after a moment during which she blinked again, but two great tears
fell in spite of her efforts. 'I wanted to tell you how I came back to
your flat, but you'd gone away --'
'You came back? When?'
'A week after I left you --' She stopped and shook her head. 'It doesn't
matter any more now, does it, Carl?'
Gently he drew her to him, and his lips were tender on her own.
'No, my darling, it doesn't matter any more. It's the future, not the
past, that's important. I love you, Renny, love you with all my heart.'
'And I love you.' A smile fluttered to her lips. 'I was packing,' she told
him unnecessarily, 'because I was so sure you meant to cast me off.'
Carl frowned and seemed to wince at her words. But he said nothing,
merely bending his head to press his lips to hers in a tender, loving
kiss. She responded gladly, thinking of the Chinese belief that with a
new year there comes a new life.
Here, in this little corner of the Orient, a new life was just beginning
for her husband and herself, a life where the essential trinity of
spiritual, mental and physical love would endure for ever.