India.

A different Perspective
Introspective Essays

Looking at the new emerging India

with love, hope and critical eyes; we
are destined for greatness if only we
can shed our pettiness.

Feedback: You are welcome to write-

thisbusinessofliving@yahoo.com

Kind attn: Pradeep Maheshwari

http://sites.google.com/site/pradeepmaheshwaris164gk1del/
http://sites.google.com/site/pkcentreforchange/Home

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CONTENTS

ACQUIRED RIGHTS
Andaman Getaway
Concern, Candor and Critic
ASHOKA THE HARBINGER OF CHANGE
Our children are us.
The Govt as a Whipping Post.
Something to Chew Over
The Most Fearless people on Earth
Missing the movement.
THE CASE FOR MORE HOLIDAYS.
On a Leash
Removing or Promoting
The Revenge of the Villages.
Self as the Benchmark.
Snuffing Them Out Softly.
Show some courage
THE ILLUSION OF VIRTUE.
The Language Conundrum
Tradition, Modernism & Reality
The WHYs behind the whys.
A Bit on the Wild Side.
TIRED for Nothing.
THE TRAFFIC POLICE AND WE.
Upgrade or perish
The Trap of Virtue.
Wake up to it; now!
GRANDER THAN THOU
CAN WE REALLY HELP?
CORPORATE LAWYERS AND WHAT THEY DO

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ACQUIRED RIGHTS

A little scene occurred in front of our house

the other day which reminded me of how we
have allowed ourselves to be disinherited of
our rights. There was some sparking, quite a
lot really, and the current supply then went
off. The dept was informed. A small group of
responsible residents were grouped around
the electric pole, waiting for the Lord of
Repairs to arrive and put the matters to
right. He did arrive and not very late either.
Ours is considered a posh colony and this has
some merits. Posh means moneyed is not lost
on the service providers. This is how the
conversation went.

Repairman: Hum, Ha. This is a very bad

jumble of wires.
He hasn’t climbed as yet or anything.
Everybody is looking up. This comment does
not bode very well.
Resident: It can’t be much. It was just a
spark. You have to simply join the wires
again.
The repairman cannot tolerate this trend of
thought. He was expecting a hefty something
to be gained out of the situation.
Repairman: It is so high (as if this is the first
time he has seen a pole) and the jumble
3
makes it very difficult to reach. I will go and
get a proper ladder (which they don’t really
have) and colleague to help me.
Terror seeps into the tone of the residents (If
he goes, who knows if he will return or not or
if he does, when.) This cannot be permitted.
Resident: No, no. We can see that you have
identified the problem. You are obviously the
right man for this kind of job. We can see
that climbing up the pole will be child’s play
for you. Don’t bother about getting a
colleague. We shall help you.
All the others: Yes, Yes.
Now this is what the repairman was waiting
to hear. This is more like it. Eventually with
more hee-hawing and problems being stated
and resolved it was agreed that for a sum of
Rs Two Hundred the repairman would risk his
neck on the spot, without a ladder or
assistance. The job was done in less than half
an hour, the time it took to have the above
conversation. The repairman did a job which
he is already being given a salary to do. He is
also under some constraints to report back to
his superiors. Had the residents left the state
of affairs well alone, they would have got
their electricity earlier and saved themselves
Rs 200.

4
This is what I mean when I say “We are so
busy being clever, that we have no time to
be intelligent”

What has gone wrong with us? The attitude

shown by the repairman is now part of our
national character. The salesman in the
shop, the cashier in the bank, the clerk in
any office, the cop at crossing…..just about
everywhere and everyone is behaving as if
they are doing us a favor. Their salary is an
acquired right, guaranteed by the
constitution. Even if cash gratification is not
always in order, there is always a lot of
pleading and flattering involved in every
exchange. If by any chance you allow
yourself the pleasure of demanding by right
that you be served, the other guy will go into
a sulk and find millions of excuses to not do
your job and you can’t do a thing about it. It
is sadistic the way every little authority
becomes a reason for ego-gratification or
worse; pocket-warming.

What have we done to ourselves? We are

ourselves to blame. Over the years through
our long and chequered history we have
taught the public servant that we are
prepared to pay extra for everything as along
as our selfish interests are served first. So
5
much so that we have stopped keeping our
papers or ledgers in order and we break most
minor laws with impunity knowing or at least
hoping that we shall pay our way through and
avoid any official action. The bigger
industrial houses with vested interests made
this a regular practice with payments under
the table on an acquired right basis. Then
the democratic style of government learnt
the trade, so much so that today everyone
has rights except us, ourselves. We have
given ourselves up for ransom and are now
totally under threat of the system. So much
so, that it has even permeated into our
personal relationships. We are so ever ready
to get into the groveling mode.

Can we reverse it? I wonder.

6
Andaman Getaway

Everyone has heard of the Andaman. To most

it is known only as the penintiary for hard-
core prisoners in the British regime and today
it is being promoted as another beautiful
corner of India. There is no doubt that it is a
very beautiful place. I would say that it
remains so lovely because it has remained
out of reach of the modern man and luckily
too far away from the mainland. All in all,
my opinion is that all is well there. It is a
lovely place for the person who finds
happiness in the company of a book and is
actually looking for a quiet spot far away
from the noise, hustle-bustle and modern day
hyper-activity.

My opinion aside, there is definitely a case to

improve the basic infrastructure in the
islands and make it more accessible to
tourists because that is what brings in the
moolah and funds are absolutely required by
the A & M Administration. The question at
the other end of this viewpoint is that too
many tourists, will they or will they not spoil
the pristine beauty of the area?

7
Be it as it may, opportunity to me came in
the guise of an invitation from a friend in
Port Blair, which is the capital of the
territory. Because of the sea separating us,
Port Blair can be reached only by air or ship.
We preferred taking a plane so we decided to
take our flight from Chennai. It is very
surprising why all the flights leave at 6 or so
in the morning which means that we need to
arrive in Chennai one day earlier and then
spend time cooling our heels. Just when we
have fallen asleep out of sheer boredom, it is
time to get up early in the wee hours to
report in time at the airport. This being
nighttime for the taxi-wallahs, we ended up
paying special prices. If you take all this into
account, you end up spending a hefty amount
just to take the flight into Port Blair. But
honestly, the flight was good. The breakfast
was surprisingly good which would otherwise
have been a very unhappy beginning to a
very looked-forward holiday.

In passing though I do mention that the

check-in was overdone by the security angle
and any one with a modicum of intelligence
and idea of security strategy would clearly
see that the people there had no idea what
they were up to. I wonder why no lawyer has
taken up this question as a PIL and helped in
removing this annoying frisking and messing.
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My tweezers were confiscated. Have these
people no idea that a trained close combat
person can use anything as a weapon? As the
old saying goes, LOCKS are for honest people
– not thieves.

Well, all said and done here we are in Port

Blair. The plane has landed and we only had
to make the effort of getting down by
ourselves and then began the pampering. Oh
Boy, I have never been taken care of like
this. As we came to find out, these were the
finest four days of our lives. We did not even
have to go and fetch our luggage, it was done
for us. The car took us to the guesthouse
that would be our home for the next 4
nights. We were welcomed with coffee, and
before we knew what was what, we were in
a boat specially chartered for us and slowly
chugging away towards Ross Island.

Ross Island happens to be the island chosen

by the colonial administration of the British
to start a colony and headquarters. The ruins
on the island are more than a century old. It
is an eye-opening realization. The effort that
would have gone into realizing this small
oasis in the middle of the Arabian Sea far
away from anywhere except the mainland of
Andamans, which was equally wild. They had
created Baths, Tennis Courts, Clubs and
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Residences, Bakery and what not; a mini self-
contained Robinson Crusoe paradise. The
small museum created there is a beautiful
repository of history. Again, here I may
reiterate that though this is one of the musts
of the tourist spots of Andamans, it is more
for the lovers of history. The place is
beautiful as all untouched islands would be in
the Indian Ocean. The natural beauty apart
the old ruins now being claimed back for its
own by nature is a sight by itself.

We had the great fortune of going to the

island on a Wednesday when there are no
regular tourist boats in operation. So, it was
an added pleasure to go about without
groups of chattering hordes all around us.
The first thing to strike me was the total
absence of man-made mechanical sound.
Absolutely none. This was heaven. I could
think of nothing better than sit on the shore
wall and enjoy the peace. But we humans are
incorrigible noise –makers. I was only a few
minutes into my ecstatic journey when a
speedboat broke my reverie. What louts said
I and got up for the return journey. One deer
decided we were good for at least a small
nibble and followed us. Here was a reverse
case of intimidation. My wife was more
scared of the deer than the deer seemed to
be of humans.
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The afternoon nap was a reviver. After all we
had been up since 3 am.
The evening was already planned out for us.
We were to visit the Light and Sound show at
the cellular jail. A good show, bringing out
the story of the travails of our people in
those trying times. But in passing I must say
that some of our movies have given a very
good idea of what reality would have been
there, so there was a sense of deja vue. This
visit was followed by a walk at the marina,
which is well laid out and well lit. The cool
breeze and the breaking of the waves was
soft caressing and all this merited another
bout of quiet contemplation. For some
reason the navy was having a special day and
all the ships were lighted up in the harbor,
which was quite a sight. The return home
was followed by a wonderful dinner and a
very good night.

Essentially, visiting Andamans is of value for

its untouched underwater wildlife. We had
only three more days in hand and we chose
visits to Jolly’s Buoy and Havelock Island. In
essence visits here give you a complete idea
of what Andamans have to offer.

The trip to Jolly’s Buoy was again another

first of our lives. The drive to Wandoor gives
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you a very good idea of the landscape of the
island. The Keralites there have created a
landscape, which matches quite a bit the
original. At Wandoor, which is the
headquarters of the MG Marine National
park, we were received by one of the senior
lady wardens. The small museum of marine
life, especially of the corals is important.
The warden gave us a very informed account
of life around in the park and her knowledge
of corals was to be appreciated. The slow
and sedate boat ride was a joy. A one-hour
chug-chug through the groves all around was
like we had entered a journey in the national
Geographic TV channel. Then a small glass-
bottomed boat took us into the coral area
where every kind of sea life’s colorful aspect
was seen in its entire splendor. Eventually
we drifted down to the very small beach
there and played in the water. Snorkeling
was a possibility but we decided to enjoy the
scenery instead. The beauty is in the clean
and garbage-less vistas. The authorities are
taking great pains to keep the modern day
waste out from these areas. Plastic bags and
bottles or such are not permitted. Picking up
of even waste coral pieces is banned. Forget
any hopes of fishing. The only hunting of any
kind would be by a camera.

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The Trip to Havelock Island the next day was
just a short story in itself. A two-hour ferry
ride was the first of our lives. Seasick we
certainly were but let’s not harp on this. This
area is peopled by Bengalis and over time
they have created a landscape in their own
mainland’s image. I felt I was driving through
some area of Bengal. Our friend had
organized our stay at the Govt resort. The
first morning we just lay down in the
hammocks on the waterfront and slept it out.
Then we had lunch and a nap followed by a
drive to Radhanagar. Now here was
something. The most beautiful beach I have
ever seen. Water as clear as that of a five-
star hotel’s swimming pool and comfortably
cool. This was an experience, which will
remain with me vividly forever. The swim
was a dream adventure. It hurt when we had
to get out and return back to the resort for
the night. The night was lovely; the breeze
flowing in through the open door of the room
and flowing out by the opposite window. The
silence was exquisite. I had to get up and by
3 am I was outside on the verandah waiting
for the sunrise which was a superb show put
up for us that day and lasted till 8 am. My
other pleasure is a cup of coffee first thing in
the morning. The restaurant gave me three.
Surely this was heaven! Nothing was going to
stop me from returning to Radhanagar for
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another swim. And we did just that. Topped
it by a cold coffee and lunch later, before
returning to the ship for the trip home to
Port Blair.

Alas. We had no time, the next morning we

had to take the flight back.
But if you love the natural wilds, go there.

14
Concern, Candor and Critic

I am what they call in Homoeopathy, a chilly

patient, which means that I feel the chill
earlier and more than most of us.
Considering the years I have already spent on
this planet, there would be very few of my
close acquaintances who are not aware of
this fact. Yet at the beginning of each
winter, at every meeting, I am unfailingly
greeted by the refrain “Say, your woolens
are already out? It is not so cold yet!” And
using this as a fulcrum to get going, they get
into explaining how they are not able to
tolerate warm clothes and how their health
is good enough to resist the cold. What are
they trying to say? Are they concerned about
me or just showing off or letting me know
what a miserable creature I am?

They then go on to better this commentary

with advice like that I should go for morning
walks to increase my resistance because they
themselves do so. One of my sisters makes
this comment with such regularity that
whenever she does not make this remark I
wonder what is wrong. This same sister was
down with pneumonia last January because
she had been to an open air party in the
dead of winter (a very uncomfortable way of
15
celebrating marriages that is becoming
popular in Delhi) with not even a shawl on
her shoulders. I suppose it was more
necessary to show all her jewelery and sari
than worry about a short bout of holiday in
bed. The holiday also served the purpose of
getting all and sundry to visit her in
sympathy. What a perverted logic we follow
in our lives?

Why can’t we greet each other by saying

something nice? The reality is that we do and
with what panache! We praise only with a
sting in the tail. In my last meeting with the
same sister, she remarked how well I had
maintained my figure – even at my age! Why
the heck did she have to add “even at my
age”? This technique of using praise to
critically make a point is more rampant than
we would care to admit.

Now this is what I have never understood.

Why do all the elders, without fail, always
show their concern by noticing how weak or
frail you have become! The other day my
uncle came to visit us and the first thing he
said to me was” I say Pradeep; you seem to
have run down and lost weight. Is everything
well with you?” Compare this with another
incident. In my teenage years, I had hurt my
back and was in bed for a very long period.
16
After a long and tedious time my health
picked enough that I could start going out.
On my very first outing my parents took me
to visit my uncle’s family where the large
size of the brood, as he thought, would cheer
me up a little. When we reached there, the
elder son made my spirits soar by remarking
that I was looking remarkably good. And I felt
so much better afterwards.

We show our concerns in many ways that are

really not conducive to our well being or go
full out to make us uncomfortable and then
expect to be appreciated. Quite often the
behavior is, it seems, designed to put the
other on the back-foot rather than make him
feel at home. It is my experience that at
gatherings when you are at the table, the
host or some other active relative always
insists on serving and pile–up your plate some
more. Of course they do not want that you
feel unattended to but their insistences can
become not only forceful but down right
tyrannical. Like force-filling up your plate
with more and more “pooris” (deep fried
Indian bread) till you feel pushed into a
corner and have to either be forcefully
unpleasant yourself and stop them with a
frown or worse leave the extra portion
uneaten; good food going down as waste.

17
Last Sunday I had a revelatory experience
reminiscent of the old time friendly and
unassuming culture of a small town, within
our community. I went visiting some people
with my 15 months old daughter. The door
was opened and the moment the lady of the
house laid her eyes on us they lighted up
with a happy smile backing it up. We were
seated and within no time a plate of goodies
was served. Kachoris( spiced stuffed puffs)
and matthies(deep fried biscuits) with spiced
and pickled mango preserve just the way I
like them. It was unceremoniously put into
my hands and I ate them all with the same
unpretentious gumption. The only thing that
was amusing in its freshness were her
continuous remarks on the child “ She is
growing up well for age, her nose is typically
of the family, she has got teeth too and how
big and straight they are, her eyes are a
little puffed-up, is she teething-what are you
giving for easier teething, teething can be
very troublesome for the entire family, she
must be keeping you awake through the
night, why is she all red in the cheek ( she
had been playing with her mummy’s lipstick
in the car and had smeared herself nice and
proper), she has a big head (she had her
head shaven only recently as is our custom),
she seems to have become darker(being fair
is the ultimate criteria of beauty with us)…..
18
so on so forth. It was a pleasantly friendly
barrage, most noticeable in its candor but
detailed in its observations.

This reminded me of a quote by Richard

Greenberg: “I appreciate people who are
civil, whether they mean it or not. I think: Be
civil. Do not cherish your opinion over my
feelings. There’s a vanity to candor that isn’t
really worth it. Be kind.”

19
ASHOKA THE HARBINGER OF CHANGE
( adapted from info downloaded from the
internet)

Go back to the times of 600 hundred years

before Christ, when the population of the
Indian subcontinent would have been
around a mere 2.5 million (25 lakhs). When
science would have been limited to making
bows, arrows and chariots. When stress as
we know today could not have existed and
Mother Earth provided enough of
everything. Yet the question of suffering
held more sway then than now.

Gautam Buddha was aghast at the sickness

and death he saw around him. A prince of
the realm, with everything going for him, he
found life such a weight on his spirit that he
renounced the worldly trappings for that of
an ascetic in search of a more relevant aim
in life, and eventually found and experienced
a Truth, the expounding of which continues
to this day. Some two hundred years later,
another prince gave a strong foundation to
this philosophy and reality in everyday life by
personal example. This was emperor Ashoka,
the third monarch of the Mauryan dynasty.

20
Very few archeological facts are to be found
to support the legends that have gathered
around these historical giants, but both lives
created an impact that has survived in
Southeast Asia. The stories carried by word
of mouth and embellished, no doubt, in the
telling is all we have to go by. The truth of
the pudding is in the eating.

The relevance of Buddha’s teachings leaves

no place for argument. Countries like Tibet
and Thailand are steeped in it. Though India
was its birthplace, both in concept and
implementation, the depth of Hinduism did
not let it have sway as it has done in other
countries. Today the pragmatic values are
appreciated and followers can be found
everywhere.

The British historian H.G.Wells has this to say

about Ashoka: “Amidst the tens of thousands
of names of monarchs that crowd the
columns of history…the name of Ashoka
shines, and shines almost alone, a star.”
Ashoka’s attempt at governance on the basis
of Buddhist thought made him an exemplary
figure in Buddhist lore and information about
him has been preserved in Buddhist
literature. Till the 18th century it was all
word of mouth, with no definitive historical
record. Then came the pioneers from Europe
21
and discovered a large number of edicts in
India, Nepal, Pakistan and Afghanistan.
These edicts, inscribed on rocks and pillars,
are a window into Ashoka’s time. At the
same time Buddhist literature was also
rediscovered and translated into English. The
extent of Ashoka’s influence then gradually
emerged.

Translating the inscriptions took a while. It

was only in 1915 that the name ASHOKA
actually was found. Till then there was much
talk of a king known as “Beloved-of-the-
Gods”. The story comes out of a king who
was terribly cruel at first and then converted
to become a just and revered ruler. This
could easily have been a mythical story
depicting how a good king should be, and it
was never taken otherwise. With all the
stone pillars and edicts being found, it had to
be accepted that this great king almost
totally forgotten for 700 years, was a gem in
India’s crown.

Generally, Ashoka is known for his change of

heart after the conquest of Kalinga. This is
borne out from all the information available.
Some time prior to his conquest of Kalinga,
Buddhist thought had already come into his
life. It is therefore assumed that his thinking
process must have begun to be impressed by
22
it. The horror and pain that he saw on the
battlefield had the effect of a shock that
opened his eyes. From that day on he was a
changed man. An ascetic at heart. A just
ruler in practice. In his quest for a just and
equitable kingdom, Ashoka began erecting
his pillars and writing on huge rocks his
advice and edicts to his people and
functionaries. He now shines as a tolerant
and caring monarch, adopting the middle
path pragmatically. In his effort to improve
the lives of his people he instituted many
changes in governance and backed them with
public utility works that would directly
benefit his people. He would go out often on
inspection tours and never allowed anything
to come in between him and affairs of state.
From a predatory foreign policy of
subjugating every kingdom around him, he
adopted coexistence and cooperation.
Wildlife was protected and hunting of certain
animals was forbidden, a concept that is only
now percolating into the modern day
governance. The fostering of all religions
equally and helping them to coexist in
harmony was encouraged. His officers were
goaded into looking after the problems of his
people and assisting the people towards a
better life. Wells were dug and fruit trees
planted all over the kingdom.

23
Though an ardent Buddhist himself, and in
every move of his the influence of Buddhism
could be noticed, Ashoka never imposed his
own personal wishes on his people. He did try
to inculcate a certain individual morality
such as respect towards parents, elders,
teachers, friends and even servants. He
encouraged generosity and offering of alms
in charity and assistance to the poor,
including friends and relatives. Not
surprisingly, he advised harmlessness towards
all creatures. Following Buddhist principles,
he advised moderation in spending and
saving.

For him it was more important to treat

people properly than performing ceremonies
and yagnas to create good luck. Good
behaviour will bring in good luck in its wake.
To increase mutual respect and tolerance, he
advocated basic education in not only in
one’s own religion but also those of the
others. His deep sense of self worth is seen
through his advice to his people to be kind,
to self examine relentlessly, to be grateful,
to act with genuine enthusiasm, to be loyal
and to exercise self-control.

We have no idea how successful he was in

establishing his enlightened reign, but it is
well known that his style of governance
24
became the basis of all advice to future
kings, and in the ancient Buddhist world this
was part of a prince’s education. This was
the ideal to be followed. If you read today’s
newspaper, you will agree that our powers
that be could learn much from these
centuries old edicts.

25
Our children are us.

Recently I noticed an advert on the TV

showing a proud man not taking help from his
children while getting off the train. The song
in the background sings of the fact that the
head has never been lowered and never will
it be. What a sad reflection on our values.
Does becoming friends with our children
make us into weak dependants?

This speaks volumes of our intelligence and

our attitudes. I read this sentence in my
younger days and it has kept me on track
since: “A lot of arrogance and nothing to be
arrogant about.” Is pride only a matter of
wearing a clean designer dress and standing
tall and not even accepting your son’s hand
in a gesture of love, respect and regard?

Will our manliness be overshadowed and

emasculated by letting our child stand tall
along with us? Remember, we made him into
what he is today. Can’t we derive pleasure
from his persona and the grand guy he has
now become? Do we have to be the guy in
total control and know-all! It is funny how we
think of our progeny only as our possessions
and extension of our selves but never as
friends and shoulders to cry upon.
26
What the electronic media is doing to the
impressionable minds needs to be reflected
upon. The lack of sense, reality is
appalling. . Humor is still at the village
bumpkin stage; an insult to intelligence. The
intelligence of the people making these
movies and story-lines can be gauged by the
fact that in the 40s and 50s it was
fashionable to throw barbs at Hitler, of
course with the Hitlerian mustache. This has
now become a fixed feature. You are
supposed to know that the guy with the
Hitler bush is there to give you a comic
break. Stuttering is another feature. There is
always a cabaret type scene and the drink of
choice is always VAT 69. We seem to be
stuck there too. Successful people with
money to burn always have a bimbo on their
arms and drinks to relax or forget. Rape has
been made into a sport. Every time the
zamindar gets angry he takes down the old
303 rifle to kill his malefactor. His word is
final and he can get away with anything as if
laws and other possibilities do not exist in
this country. Kindness and generosity are
traits not be seen in the educated and
powerful class; these seem to be the
exclusive domain of the poor. Doctors are
shown as basically magicians who will cure
everything with an injection. The practice of
27
medicine and law and other important
subjects that can have grave repercussions is
so badly and wrongly projected that people
get wrong ideas because they take it at face
value. We are spreading ignorance and
misinformation by making story-lines easy.
And worse of all we are giving them ideas.
The number of instances where a crime was
committed because the idea came from a
movie or book is one too many to ignore.

And as last parting shot, I might as well

mention the over dressing, over make-up,
over-lighting, over-talking, over-acting, over-
doing the colors and deafening levels of
recording and playback.

What the heck are we promoting?

Everybody (generally speaking) reads the

dailies and watches the news. So if I bring up
the activities of murder and cannibalism as
reported at Nithari, I am not, I hope, raking
up an issue. The question that bothers me is
how this could have happened right in the
heart of things. We can understand events
taking nefarious shape in isolated
uninhabited areas but in the middle of
NOIDA?

28
Anyway this goes to prove that the best place
to hide is in the crowd.

Coming back to the point, there are two

things of note in the Nithari events. One that
the law-givers have lost all sense of
proportion. Their lack of responsibility and
using their position for living the good life is
the main feature to come out in all this.
Unfortunately what hurts is the fact that
these so called humans are one of us. The
perpetrator and the protector, both come
from the same mould. So we may well ask:
are we not as a people without any guiding
principles?

I am apt to say yes. We are one of the most

inertia-filled, self-centered grabbers. Just
look at how conveniently we allowed Sati,
Devdasi, Thuggi and Bonded labor to become
prevalent in our society and it is still there
even after five generations of anti-
campaigning. How easily we put the match to
our daughter-in-laws. How easily we throw
out our pestering old parents. How callously
the driver-conductor duo allows a child to be
crushed under the wheel of the school bus.
These are not figments of my imagination;
these are pointers from news items from the
capital of our country.

29
When I read that a senior official and his wife
had been keeping a minor girl servant locked
up, torturing her with beatings and cigarette
butts, my heart wept at our people and the
poor girl involved. The question is why if not
just sadism?

Let us ask ourselves quickly and sincerely if

we have not allowed ourselves to be
desensitized, become callous and somewhat
sadistic? We may have abolished zamindari
but not the “I-am-the-master-and-I-have-the-
right-and only-I-matter” attitude. I wonder if
it is not getting worse?

30
The Govt as a Whipping Post.

In my write-up Trap of Virtue, I happen to

give the instance of “Free” electricity
promised and given by the Chief Minister of
an Indian state to farmers as an example of
how the so seeming act of generosity was
only a garb for the politician to be seen as
virtuous; and I got squarely blamed for
indulging in “Government Bashing” which I
must admit is a very common sport amongst
us. Everything from thunderstorms, dry-
spells, accidents, giving birth to a girl child,
ending up buying stale bread and such are all
blamed on the govt.

If we had our way, we would need a

government official (and an honest one at
that) attached to every individual to do the
thinking for him and ensure that the citizen
of this great country does not get a raw deal!
Somehow the lack of personal responsibility
is glaringly obvious in every small act of our
lives. Just look at the way the traffic moves
in Delhi. If this is how we are going to live
and let live, then I would say we have no
right to complain. We have got it coming.

31
Once I was traveling from Bombay to
Hyderabad. I had finished my work in Bombay
and without much ado went to the railway
station to catch the next train to Hyderabad.
By experience I knew that all I had to do to
get a berth was to contact the Ticket
Controller and all would be settled for a
price which was acceptable to me as the
alternative was to wait two weeks or so in
Bombay to get a proper reservation. I was
assigned a berth and I went and occupied it.
Soon after another gentleman came in, took
his seat and straight away began his litany of
complaints against the Ticket Controller’s
integrity and then of course the
government’s inability to stop corruption in
the railways and for that matter anywhere.
So I asked him blankly why he had become a
party to the corrupt exchange. The Ticket
Controller is just an employee. It is pure
economics of demand and supply. How does
the government come into it? Was he not
responsible in promoting the corruption of
minds? If there is a buyer, a seller is bound to
spring up. I can assure you the gentleman
was not at all pleased at this turn of
arguments.

The pervading logic seems to be that once

we have voted a government into power, all
our responsibilities are over. Fine. The
32
Government also responds in kind. Take the
law that you cannot smoke, run to catch a
bus, urinate in public and many such laws
which cannot be enforced. We get the
government we deserve. If you go deeper
into the question, you will see even though
there is a lot of complaining we are happy to
let things ride in their present flexibility as it
permits us to live happy-go-luckily, breaking
laws with impunity.

I wonder how we can forget that the people

who are governing us are coming from our
very ranks. It is all of us as a whole who are
putting them there.

Another time, I was traveling on a reserved

berth from Nagpur to Delhi. On boarding I
found the assigned berth for three people
already occupied by four. There was just no
place for me to sit leave alone sleep because
it was a sleeping berth. So I asked around to
know who was sitting there without a
reservation. One man got the hint and got up
and moved off but another woman refused to
move. I asked to move but her argument was
that she had no place else to go to. Another
traveler chipped in with the fact that she
was a widow as if that settled her right to
impose on others. I decided to then use all
my dramatic ability and give a fine show of
33
temper. That moved her and her
sympathizers. One invited her to share her
seat with a snide look at my heartless
behavior. That suited me fine but the point is
that I had to fight for my right of berth. At
this moment one of the travelers took my
side and started discussing the inability of
the government to regulate anything.
Although I must admit he was indirectly
berating the other travelers but as this was
not politically or socially correct at that
moment, he chose to focus on the
government as a whipping post – thereby
saying his piece and not raking up a
controversy.

We have to collectively admit hat we are

responsible for letting things slide and not
raising our voices when needed.

Though in parting I would like to ask the

question, if the Chief Minister of a State is
not the Government then who is?

34
Something to Chew Over

There is no doubt that India is on the rise and

go. Unshackled from the socialistic pattern of
running the country, the greatness of the
Indian spirit and enterprise has in a matter of
few years shown what Indians are capable of.
Tata was able to make a car from scratch
that is competing with global brands. Our
fledgling airlines are going all over the world.
We are now even running the businesses for
them from our back rooms. There is no doubt
that for some time to come India is going to
be a star. The question is do we have the
vision and discipline to make it a self-
sustaining effort.

Take the history of many countries after the

World War II and you see economies of
countries from Japan to Mexico bouncing and
then soon deflating into a depression. They
started with cheap labor as their plus point
fuelled by dollars and pounds. Soon the
salaries grew and the economic viability
reduced and the owners of the dollars and
pounds went elsewhere.

35
On the psychological front, with satiety a
certain amount of arrogance and
complacency creeps in and the fire in the
belly is definitely reduced. Let’s hope this
does not happen to us. There is another more
potent threat to us and that is from
ourselves. There is no doubt that Indians are
a brilliant people and have a lot of greatness
and goodness in them. But the converse is
also true. There is also a pettiness,
vindictiveness and smugness that undermine
us. I am certain that this statement of mine
will bring forth the usual arguments that I am
being narrow-minded and as an Indian I
should not say such things. I still ask my
countrymen to look a little forward and
backwards.

To begin with, look at the epic Mahabharat.

The greatness of the Pandavas and the
pettiness and blinkered thinking of
Duryodhan and his father backed by all their
ministers and loyalists. Then look closer in
history. How did the muslim marauders from
across Afghanistan find entry into India;
because somebody wanted to avenge his
pride and destroy Prithviraj Chauhan? How
did the British manage to become the
masters; because some people allied with
them and conspired to defeat the local
masters like Shirajuddullah, Tipu Sultan and
36
the Queen of Jhansi among many with hopes
of becoming kings themselves? How did a
handful of Britishers, outnumbered 100 to 1,
manage to win in a short battle, the most
impregnable fortress of those times of India –
Aligarh? And more recently, how did we
permit the division of our country into three
and begin our story of independence with the
disfranchising and murder of millions?

We have to admit that there is an inherent

weakness in our make up somewhere and
until and unless we are great enough to look
at it straight in the face, we shall surely
undermine our march into the great future
we are all visualizing.

There is no doubt that we are spiritually a

great people with a lot of kindness and
understanding built into our basic character.
But the converse also happens whenever
money power and security is behind us. I
often wonder where all these grim stories
one reads everyday in the newspaper
originate from. In some of the stories the
viciousness and sadism is proverbial. But let
me focus on the everyday happenings which
are more the rule. I give some instances from
train journeys.

37
I was traveling from Aurangabad to
Hyderabad. I was stranded and there was no
option but to get on that particular train
without a reservation. The Ticket collector
understood my plight and said it is OK by him
if the passengers do not object. I told the
passengers my plight. I suppose my style and
education came through and the poor rural
folk were so impressed that they offered me
a berth and would not take a “no” while one
of them slept on the floor. The gratitude in
my heart knew no bounds.

In another instance, I was traveling from

Delhi down south in the middle of Dec. I had
no warm bedding with me, hoping that my
warm clothes would help me pass one night
in the train. It was biting cold and there I
was on my berth in the classical foetus
position and wishing for the night to end.
This, the old couple from Punjab on the
other berth were not ready to tolerate. They
provided me with a blanket and even tucked
me in as my father would have done. The
next day I was fed and taken care of like a
favorite son. This is the stuff India is made
of.

But there are other stories not so pleasant.

Once I was traveling and there was a girl
from the north east in the compartment who
38
was not speaking well any of our languages.
She had a little extra luggage. The Ticket
Collector came and stared bothering her
even to the extent of mishandling her
belongings. I intervened and all of us in the
compartment took the stance that in all we
were eight persons and there were not
enough pieces of luggage in the compartment
to invite a penalty of excess baggage. Who is
to say what belonged to whom? The
argument was furious and lasted for over 40
minutes. The Ticket Collector went away
empty handed threatening us and returned
later with four more people. But we all
fought him off together. He was visibly
frustrated of having been denied his pound of
flesh, left with a parting shot – “Go to hell”
pointedly at me!

In another instance there was a soldier

traveling on an army pass with really a lot of
luggage. He was obviously not much into the
ways of the world having gone from a rural
background straight into the army. The
Ticket Collector honed on to him like
magnet. He had a tricycle and the ticket
Collector said hat it was illegal to bring
cycles into the compartment. And he asked
for a hefty penalty. I took up cudgels
immediately. I requested the TC to look the
other way; after all this was a soldier in the
39
Indian army and ready to lay his life for us,
returning home after two years to his family
and so on and so forth. But no, the TC would
not be moved. Ignorance was no excuse he
said. Then I asked him as a “gentleman” to
use his powers to pardon the mistake and he
replied – “I am not a gentleman, I am an
employee of the railways.”

This was so funny and serious at the same

time. I told him I would rather throw the
tricycle out rather than pay him four times
its worth in penalty. It would be cheaper to
buy a new one later. I told him squarely that
I would not pay him anything and he could do
whatever he wanted. I even spoke of a veiled
possibility of a telephone call to Delhi and
take matters further. This went on for a
while; neither budging an inch. Eventually he
had the grace to concede defeat and left
with the sage advice that we should hide the
tricycle so as not to invite the ire of any
other TC.

This is India in microcosm. If you can see the

humor in the situation there is of course a lot
of it but this childishness at the national
level can in a collective way be the element
that will undermine all our doing. Let’s see
where it takes us. At the mall business level
we are already hurting. There are a lot of
40
business possibilities but none of it is
maturing. Reason- none of us is prepared to
trust each other and whenever we do, the
chances of being taken for a ride are almost
4 out of 5. To even the most inexperienced
person living outside the realm of the self-
employed it would be clear that this scenario
is keeping us back and will keep us back in
the future too.

I hope India’s greatness will help it rise

above this shortcoming.

41
The Most Fearless people on Earth

Recently I received a video clip of a couple

who brushed passed a fast moving train in
their hurry to cross the tracks. It is then I
started wondering on the fact that we are
about the most fearless people on earth. We
are so conscious of the importance of time
that we are prepared to play with death. I
see this happening all the time when I go out
on the roads in my car. Pedestrians and other
drivers behave as if I am not there. I have
noticed umpteen times that most pedestrians
will see you coming and then simply merrily
continue to go on their way. The motor
cyclist at best sees you as an obstruction that
has to be negotiated and they zigzag with
impunity endangering themselves and others.
They are too important, cocksure and fully in
control, too much in a hurry and the
necessity to brave the oncoming traffic does
not deter them at all.

The other day I was driving down to Gurgaon

a small distance away from Delhi. I was on
the highway to Jaipur and in front of me was
42
a SUV. I saw a scooterist in the by lane all
ready to enter the traffic, revving away and
you could see his scooter jumping with every
revving which he would then control to keep
it from running away. Just as the SUV was 3
meters away from him he lost control and
shot off like a rocket in front of the SUV and
got dragged a few meters before the SUV
could brake and stop. So tragic.

I suppose everyone is now aware of the fact

that a driver’s view while rearing is limited;
yet be it a pedestrian, motorcyclist or
motorist, they keep coming on even when
they can see the car moving towards them
and I have had near misses 4 out of 5 times
when I try to back out. What after all is
behind this phenomenon?

My analysis: We are a care-free people,

which is a good thing from the stress point of
view but in today’s life of mechanical
monsters we also need to learn to be a little
circumspect. Unfortunately the brain needs
ideas to be planted in it for it to act on it.
Our upbringing is sorely amiss on this point.
Most children are brought up with so much
love and care that they grow up to feel that
it is the responsibility of the world at large
to take care of them whereas they are doing
us a favor by being there for us. So, of course
43
the onus of saving these pedestrians or
motorcyclists or for that matter anyone at all
is squarely on us. The rest is destiny. Nobody
goes or comes without the appointed hour
having come, so why worry.

When you attach “Cleverness” with

fearlessness, we have an explosive mixture.
A trip out on the roads seeing the way
motorcyclists and plain cyclists come out
from nowhere and plonk themselves in front
of fast moving vehicles is so un-
understandably hair- raising. This tendency
then plays in even in minor happenings in our
lives. Our tendency to be clever is so strongly
motivating us that we would rather
jeopardize everything we value then show a
modicum of intelligence in behavior
patterns. I will illustrate with two stories.

We have a maid who comes in for the daily

cleaning and sweeping of the house. One day
I noticed a piece of broken wood lying in a
corner for three days and queried her up as
to why she was not cleaning that corner. Her
reply: “I was cleaning the corner alright but I
thought that the wood has been placed there
purposely so I was replacing it there
everyday”. Not doing her job was not good
enough; she had to also show off how
diligently she was doing it! Her fearlessness
44
in her attitude is stunning. Does she really
feel she can con us and be taken seriously? Is
she not afraid to lose her livelihood?

On another occasion, I noticed that she had

not removed the waste basket from outside
the front door after the janitors had emptied
it. So I left it there and decided to see what
she would do when she came in the next day.
She uses the same corner to remove her
footwear so I was certain she would notice
the empty basket and bring it in as a matter
of course. But she didn’t. So I asked her why
she was leaving the basket outside and not
bringing it in. Pat came the reply that she
had checked and there was no basket
outside. Why did she give me such a stupid or
shall I call it a clever reply?

Perhaps (1) she thought that the answer

would satisfy me, show her good intentions
and later she would go and bring in the
basket with no one the wiser or (2) She could
involve me in an argument and if worse came
to the worst, threaten me with quitting and
shut me up nice and proper. But I did not fall
for either of these tricks and in plain words
told her that she was lying ( to make her
realize that she should not adopt these silly
tricks with me) and that she should go out

45
again and bring it in which she did quietly
and meekly at that.

The tragedy is that they never learn from

their experiences. They continue to behave
in the same way, as a matter of habit, very
comfortable in their own infallible sense of
ability to manipulate life to their entire
benefit and satisfaction. If only they could
see themselves as others saw them?!

The intentions and show of fearlessness and

cleverness can be seen at every level of
existence. Be it an MD or CEO or the Canteen
boy, parents, teachers, partners or friends;
all play at this game. We take “Tughlakhi”
decisions without concern or fear of
consequences and then spend huge amounts
of resources in resolving tricky situations and
without a moment’s reflection interfere in
matters that do not concern us. We are not
afraid to make a fool of ourselves (though
how that could ever be is unthinkable)as we
know deep down that we can always
rationalize, argue and cleverly carpet
everything over. This colossal energy could
be used to right the wrongs instead or learn
from the mishaps and improve things and our
own personas. But no; this is not in our style.
The educated ones use their intelligence to a
better degree while the juniors know full
46
well that they will not be hanged for it; so
how does it really matter?!

Missing the movement.

Traveling from point A to point B in your own

vehicle can be quite an education in Delhi.
We see other drivers behave in a manner
which boggles the imagination. But I do not
wish to simply repeat what had been said
often by many writers and most drawing
room conversations. I wish to put forth a
point which I find hard to comprehend and
illustrate. So in spite of the fact that I may
sound a little dry and mathematical, I will
make an attempt. First to make the point
which is that even though we are in a moving
traffic we calculate our position and
movement vis-à-vis others and take decisions
as if every other person was stationary, will
remain so and is an idiot to boot? Let me
now attempt to illustrate.

At the cross roads, the light is red. When it

goes green, you see the guy on the right
cutting in front of you to go towards the
intersection on your left. Why did he come to
the right at all? This is a mystery. We can
47
only guess from the visual treats given by
other drivers that the guy was in a hurry to
overtake everybody even if it meant it would
land him on the wrong side of the road. Then
when the time comes to move he shoots off
towards his destination – totally oblivious of
the fact that others will move too. How do
you explain that? And of course, the guy on
your left wants to go to the extreme right.
And he will cut right in front of you if he has
to; you, after all you are most probably there
to just watch the smart Alecs zipping about.

Now why did this guy land up on the left side

of the road when he wanted to go to the
right? We can only presume that he did so
because that was the only gap available to
him at the starting line and a good pole
position can mean everything in winning a
motoring race. Then we have to also consider
that his vehicle is designed as a racing
wheeler while all the others are on the road
to just see him jetting off. He has calculated
well that others are all stationary because
they don’t know better and will remain that
way. He is the only one with any sense to get
on with things.

Just the other day a motorcyclist came from

behind on my right, zipped in front of the car
at right angles and stopped at my left to talk
48
to another motorcyclist waiting for him
there. It was a beautiful little movement,
deftly executed. My heart went “bump” but
my head wondered why all this real ability of
perfect timing and control is being wasted on
such a useless and risky maneuver. Every
time I read about a two-wheeler being
rammed by a bus or truck, I think of these
hard cored bike enthusiasts who are
constantly risking their lives just to slip in
front of the next vehicle. I am sure it is not
just a matter of being in a hurry; there is
definitely a lot of pride behind all this. I am
convinced that in getting ahead of others
gives them a high; always forgetting that all
this is for naught as they would all meet
again at the next red light.

The same style of thinking and behaving can

be seen in other walks of life. In our
calculations we always forget that the world
is in constant forward movement. We are
just too warped up in ourselves. Yesterday at
the petrol pump the lady ahead of me would
not move her car even after the petrol had
been pumped in. She had to first get back
her change back and then make the
milometer readings in her diary and all this
she was doing comfortably as if there were
no other motorists on the road. Requests to
her by the pump attendants to move ahead a
49
little so that the other cars can take their fill
was not having any effect on her.

I find it hard to digest that anyone can be so

blind and blinkered. Soon they will be
outpaced and left to fend for themselves on
the sidewalk while the rest of the world zips
past. While these oldies were busy winning
pointless skirmishes, the battle-front moved
elsewhere and soon even the skirmishes
vanish from their lives. There is nothing left
but memories and a lot of moping to do.

But luckily we are small cogs in a very big

machinery and somehow or other we manage
along helped by friends, family and the
momentum of our own lives. Like in driving,
the saving grace is always the consideration
shown by others, the restrictive paths which
keep us bridled in and we get by or are
pushed along.

50
THE CASE FOR
MORE HOLIDAYS.

The Indian is not known as a hard or diligent

worker. He will never work himself to the
bone. The concept of the nose-to-the-grinding-
wheel is terribly alien to him. He believes in
fate, luck and even though everything boils
down to karma, he conveniently overlooks the
point of his own effort. Cleverness is the
hallmark; not intelligence. We prepare our kids
well for this. The parents do everything for
him so the idea that he can take control of his
life never even vaguely passes him by. Then at
school the teachers want to him to learn by
rote and never ask a question which is simply
seen as an argumentative disposition. The Govt
then stepped in and gave him a protective Big
brother embrace with a secure job and no
responsibility. To this cauldron add the
tendency to cheat on the side which makes us
very amenable to reason when requested with
a packet under the table.

The Authorities continue to believe in

the inscrutability of the Indian’s honesty;
especially when he becomes an employee of
the President of India. In contrast the rest of
the population remains a lot of incurable
scoundrels, selling the country down the river.

51
 Side-tracking a bit, I mention here that
why can’t we accept the truth of our nature
and administer accordingly. Why do we have to
presuppose that the President’s minions are all
incarnations of Vishnu the Creator and the
general populace all incarnations of Ravana
the demon? All our laws and Administrative
Rules have inherent flaws and promote the
unethical side of our characters. The populace
deemed worthy only of being lorded over; a
very clear remnant of the colonial ethos.

A good example of this theory is the sad

state of our circulation on the roads. Nobody
has been taught the rules. The Driving licenses
are sold. There is no deterrent because rules
cannot be enforced in the present state of
affairs. And nobody could care less for the
other guy. It is a free for all even to the extent
that no-one seems to be worried about his own
safety, leave alone about the other hapless
fellow.

Everyday, a show is put on by millions of

Indians of going to their workplaces, and doing
their little bit to take the country forward.
Tonnes of fuel are used up in vehicles to
transport these zealous workers to the
workplace and back resulting in pollution,
sickness from fatigue, accidents, medical bills,
and at the office - inflated telephone bills,

52
electricity bills and so on so forth. And what
have we to show for all this? – A totally
disgruntled “praja”, with curses from both
sides of the table. The Praja, wanting the
President’s employee to do his part whereas
the employee revolts on this attempt to curtail
his constitutional right of freedom from work’s
tyranny.

We want a happy country; right? Why not

have more holidays? All the excesses
mentioned in the last para will take on a
positive note. The exchequer will save
millions, thousands of liters of fuels will be
saved, pollution will be drastically reduced,
there will be less sickness and the pressures on
the medical services will more than half, there
will be electricity in excess and water also. In
one go, we will enter a period of plenty. The
work will still be done as it is done with
considerations under the table being
negotiated in the cafes, restaurants and
homes. The stress levels will plane out. There
will be less strife and the courts will see fewer
quarrels to deal with.

The economy will not suffer. The same

amount of money will be floating and doing
the rounds changing hands in the market
place. I see an exponential growth in trading
and therefore manufacturing and therefore in

53
the gross national product and therefore in the
per capita income and therefore in the
collected taxes. I would even go to the limit
and suggest that we work only on Mon, Tue,
Thu and Fridays. Our present productivity
levels are really not any higher anyway. With
lesser interference from the administrative
idiots, there will be less of impinging on the
rights of the common man to lead his simple
life. And, of course smiling faces will replace
the care-worn ones of today.

Sounds like Utopian Ramrajya – is it not?

54
On a Leash

In the evenings, I go out with my child for a

little while in the park in our residential
complex. It is a beautifully maintained park
and children from other complexes come
there too. In the last week two instances
took place which forced me to speak out and
act. Children of all ages, as young as few
months old were playing and of course with
the children are many young ladies, both
parents and maids. On some pretext or the
other young servants of the area want to
come into that area of the park; who knows
when they will be noticed. Watchmen have
been kept to shoo these young strollers but
then the watchmen is not always there and
there are always some new ones trying their
luck.

The other day one young man came in with

his dog. A big black dog which was obviously
scaring the kids. So I asked him what was he
doing there with children all around; this is
no place to walk the dog. His reply was
simple “What can I do. The dog has pulled
me here”. Now this made me angry and I
showed it. I told him if he cannot hold the
dog which is on a leash anyway, he should
stay at home and leave the walking to his

55
master and I would beat him blue and black
if he allowed the dog to pooh where the
children were playing. He quickly beat
retreat. Then about four days later, the
same thing happened again with another
caretaker and dog.

The surprising thing is that children from the

same houses visit the park too from where
these dogs are coming, yet the owners have
no respect and bring their dogs in this area
to let their dogs pooh. Have they no
sensitivity that they are dirtying the very
area in which their children will be playing
later on and opening the doors to sickness
and worse? Where does this attitude come
from? Is it our concept of secularism where
everyone is allowed certain leeway which is
translated as absolute freedom for everybody
even if it is causing a nuisance to others? If
these dog lovers are so serious about their
dogs, why don’t hey have a toilet made in
their houses for their animals instead of
dirtying the entire complex? You step into
the pooh of animals the moment you step
out? Is the fundamental freedom only for
them? Do I not have a place under this sun?
What’s behind this need to keep dogs
anyway? It can’t be love for animals because
had it been love we would not confine them
to the congested life of the cities.

56
Two recent forwards by email raised the
same question. Are we secular or hypocrites
or what? One email raised the question with
comparative pictures about the paintings of
M.F.Hussain and how they denigrate
Hinduism. Well, I must say I had never looked
into this subject with any interest until now
and had treated all the brouhaha as the
meanderings of the narrow minded. I had
always thought that as an individual M.F.
Hussain has his rights and you have the right
to like or not like what he does. But making
it a sociological issue never crossed my mind.
I looked a little closely into what the email
had to say and my feeling was this:

A word of caution with this line of thought.

You have to study the heritage of Tantra to
understand the depiction of our Gods and
their consorts.
The Hindu tantras have always advocated
spiritual emancipation through sexual release
and bondage at the same time. It is yoga in
practice in real life instead of running away
and hiding in a cave.
This is what we see in Khajurao and many
other places depicted in stone and wall
painting and even books like the Kama Sutra.
When literacy was not prevalent and books
could not be easily produced, stone was the

57
best medium. Study the culture of our
yoginis. In Jainism, release from the earthly
bondage always culminates in absolute
nakedness.
This idiotic concept of nakedness being a sin
and bad has come to us with the Christian
moral tradition.
Let us not forget our basics and our general
balance. Let us maintain our mental and
emotional equanimity. My feeling was that
the paintings had caught the mental and
emotional thought patterns of each of the
communities. Although Hussain could have
been a little more circumspect and not
depicted so much nudity knowing fully well
that in today’s climate it would offend many.
Artists are given a license and much leeway
but they should not let their hearts run away
out of control of their heads.
If you are holding the leash like in the dogs in
the story above, then you need to exercise
restrain and manage the situation from every
angle in consideration.

Then in the second forward, the topic was

how badly Hindus are being treated in their
own country. So I asked the person who sent
me the email - Are you really looking for an
answer?
Hindus are a confused lot and always afraid -
of what I have not understood.

58
We also have the bad habit of being utterly
self-centered, have a very high opinion of
ourselves and are afraid to fight for what we
want or even speak out.
Our want of moral values shows in our way of
life - where else do they burn daughters in-
law?
We are highly judgmental, always criticizing
- I suppose this is a way to feel better &
superior - yet envy is high on our list and we
do not think twice in throwing our dirt in
other's space.
We talk of brotherhood but back-biting
comes very easily to us. For a fistful of
dollars we are prepared to sell our soul.
We have always taken the route of
appeasement in even the most minor
decisions. We have always gone for short-
cuts and appeasement is a shortcut! We are
a spineless lot and we ostracize and ignore
those who speak out as disturbers of peace
and now some of us have resorted to
violence to say our piece.

If we could, we would want the rest of the

world on a tight leash always happily bearing
with us while we live with abandon and total
unconcern for anything or anybody.

In life we always get the treatment we allow

ourselves to be given.

59
Pride in lawlessness

A girl gets rapes, undressed and molested on

the street and a whole crowd will look on but
no one will lift a finger. Why? Because we
just don't have the guts to speak out or make
a stand. On a pragmatic level we do not want
to invite the ire on ourselves which is
understandable. We are always thinking as
individuals and selfishly; never as a member
of a community. I wonder if there should not
be a law to purposely make onlookers and
witnesses to lift a finger or face the ire of
the law as criminals promoting violence by
not doing anything.

Humanity never learns. Hitler could getaway

with what he did with the Jews because the
neighbors were in quiet tacit agreement. The
same happened later in erstwhile Yugoslavia.
Closer to home every community is after the
other for the most banal reasons. Every small
time political figure looking for a little press
coverage will raise the specter of
provincialism by talking about jobs only for
the locals or language or hate against other
religious communities knowing fully well that
the un-evolved mind of the masses will
mindlessly take to the streets and burn,
damage, hurt and even kill anything in sight.
Isn’t this tacit approval of mindlessness and

60
violence? Shouldn’t there be a law against it
and lock-up the instigators as criminals? This
has been the path taken by many leaders all
over the world to remain in power whereas
the population slides into further misery and
normally end up in economies collapsing
totally. See what happened in Rhodesia,
Uganda and now in India in the eastern,
western and earlier this trend was seen in
the southern states too.

Matters that will really help us improve our

lot are left untouched but we have time for
petty things. Take for instance this hue and
cry on a movie where so much energy is
being wasted in worrying about what
happened 500 years ago. But ask people to
stand up for subjects like female feticide and
they are too busy to bother. Don’t these
people see the ridiculousness of it all when
they see construction sites empty of labor
and streets without cobblers and hairdressers
as reported lately in the papers? I fail to
understand how taking away the work from a
foreigner which he is trained to do can help
these locals. Then why as country others are
not raising their fingers against it or revolt or
raise its voice. These same political figures
who want people out of their states, why
don’t they ask their own people to return
back and leave the other states alone?

61
Rather these so called political Lords get
police protection and security.

What I have never understood is how the

common man, so full of virtue and
compassion otherwise, becomes a heartless
clerk the moment he becomes the employee
of the President of India? Often using his
powers as executive to harass and blackmail.
Full of self-importance and righteousness to
uphold the law but corrupt otherwise by first
not doing his appointed work, then taking
extra inducements without any feeling of
shame and often not doing his job even after
that.
The entire legal machinery fails to deliver
justice in time. More and more draconian
laws are enacted. The police get more and
more excuses to take the public to task with
impunity. Rogue elements are having a field
day. Today if we have something to be proud
of, it is the pride we take in breaking laws
and through it show our stature in life.
Tell me how proud should I feel?

If India is to move forward, it needs to have

many second thoughts - now!

62
Removing or Promoting

A news coverage commentary on CNN made

me pen these few words. She was talking
about the spread of this new disease in
Africa. She was advocating further funds to
be poured in aid of removal of suffering. My
question is: are we removing or promoting?

Why are we so eager to pour millions and

millions into programs that lead us no-where?
Why are we so eager to promote the welfare
of people who are not really eager to do
anything for themselves? It is fantastic how
humans can delude themselves that life is
one Silk Road with happiness and wish
fulfillment is its goal.

Life may be utter misery, so what? The very

person who complains about it also goes
about doing precisely what he should not to
make it worse. This reminds me of an
instance from my own life. Many, many years
ago my maid came to me with a request for a
loan. Not a small loan. Something in the
nature of Rs 10.000 which left me aghast. I
was paying her a salary of Rs 300 per month.
Her monthly earnings were barely Rs 1200
from work in four homes. But look at her
courage. She was prepared to take on a loan

63
which she would never be remotely ever to
pay.

I was well aware that her husband was a

never-do-well and had never earned a penny
in his life. He did assist in spending the
money on a drink every evening. Her married
daughter had been deserted by her husband
and was living them. Her two sons were
coming up the same way. She was bringing
them up to become gentlemen with
education and white collar jobs but she
forgot to imbibe in them the value of work –
hard or soft. In every household, starting
with their own they were seeing the man of
the house shirking work and yet being taken
care of by the women. So finally both the
boys grew up into expecting that their wives
would take care of the earning and working
part. They were convinced as would have
been obvious to all that they were a gift to
mankind or at least to their womankind. The
maid was taking this loan to marry off her
first born. I did not give her any money. I did
not have any to give. I did ask her how the
son would support a family. She had no
reply. Sheer optimism won through. She did
find somebody to give her a loan at an
exorbitant interest and she went ahead with
the marriage.

64
Some months ago I met her again working as
a sweeper in the temple I sometimes visit
and enquired about her family. The sons it
seems were not doing anything. Their wives
were working and keeping the home fires
burning. Her husband was now too old and
sick and although she did not say it, it could
be seen that it was all a great burden. She
had perpetuated her own miserable life on to
the next generation. The loan had become a
weight around the neck. What bothers me is
this – when we assist these short-sighted
people are we helping them or hurting them?
Can we really ever help them?

I cannot stop thinking that if she had not

found anyone to give her the loan, she would
be better off!

In the same context a reality check is

warranted on how we are living and how the
governments are running the world. Look
around you. We are systematically destroying
everything around us that upholds life and
yet we are not short on complaining. We all
know about the contamination and pollution
but individually how much are we doing to
reduce it?

We all know about syphilis from centuries

past and today AIDS. Yet how many of us are

65
afraid to have a romp at the first occasion
we get? We even go looking for it in brothels.
AIDS today is on the rampage. The media is
doing its bit to highlight it. Millions are being
spent on research to look for a cure. Is this
the right track? The person who is
endangering his own life and the life of his
partners, does he not have any responsibility?
What is he doing to stop the menace? Are
these people worthy of being protected and
kept alive; for what effective purpose?

Then there is also the next question. Why

should they not die? That is the way the
universe works. The pragmatic rule is of
come and go. The universal rule is of natural
selection of the fittest. Why are we fighting
against it? What’s so frightening about death?
The whole world is today swayed by this
philosophy where death is to be avoided or
delayed at all costs. Whose idea of
immortality and youth is to keep looking
twenty and have “FUN”; whatever that
means? Look how the medicine systems and
lifestyles are developing. Indulgence is the
goal. It is not the quality of life but longevity
that is their focus. I have seen families in
India, ruined by the cost of so called
“treatment” of incurable states of cancer or
some such even with no hope and death
predictably a short time away. Why ruin the

66
family that is left behind? Why is the world
spending such big fortunes to delay the
inevitable but so little in prevention, careful
and sensible living?

I think my question is pertinent. Shall we

promote the best as our ancestors were
forced to do in spite of themselves or shall
we promote sickness and misery?

67
The Revenge of the Villages.

My interest was aroused by a sentence I read

in an article on the Revenge of Neglected
Rural India. The last line – “..they will swamp
the island of urban privilege, leveling them
down to village India standards”, is a timely
and pointed warning. Though the sentence is
in the future tense, the truth is that it is
already upon us. I live in Greater Kailash
area of New Delhi. It is supposed to be one of
the better, upper class areas. But does it
belong to us today anymore?

You have to simply step out of the house for

a walk in the colony park hoping to meet
some of the residents for a simple Good
Morning and you will realize how far the
disease has already spread. Nine out of the
ten persons you will see are from the servant
class. Jauntily dressed in the latest jeans and
T-shirts, behaving as if they are the real
residents of the place. Their very need to
show themselves off with their loud posturing
give them away but who will tell them so. I
feel it is the psychology of the one who
knows he does not belong, but cannot forget
the fact that he is very much part of the
scene and he expects to be accepted.

68
In the evenings when our young ones go out
to play and frolic in the parks, the ayahs and
other servants come out in droves along with
their friends from other localities, making a
perfect nuisance of themselves. They are
noisy, overtly conscious to make a mark.
They walk and strut around and literally
bump shoulders. It is an affirmation of their
status that they also belong. The movement
grew to a point where they even felt
courageous enough to romance in the open
like good heroes from Indian films. The
brouhaha reached such a crescendo that the
police had to be called in to check in this
disturbing atmosphere.

And the problem is not only in the colonies.

Go anywhere. Shops or offices. You are
dealing with village level people with an
exposure to life picked up from Indian films
and TV serials. The shop keepers spend a
fortune on their shops and then keep sales
men they do not bother to train or educate.
The buyers are forced to deal with personnel
who have no clue to their needs nor even
understand their language. It is a total
mismatch. Worse, the owner of the shop
could not be bothered.

My feeling is that we are ourselves to blame.

I may sound pompous but our need to retain

69
our servants has blinded us to all else. We
call them Bhaiyas and try hard to maintain
their goodwill. It is we who have made them
behave as if they are the only ones who
matter, very important and to be given all
they ask for. What else can we expect when
we are ourselves going to permit to lower
ourselves to the level of the village
standards?

The biggest example is in the drivers we are

all keeping. We buy vehicles worth lakhs and
hand them over to village louts, who have
just learnt to hold the steering wheel. Their
sense of road etiquette or for that matter
any kind of etiquette is so terrible that in the
colonies or on the roads the result is total
chaos and muscle power with selfishness
rules, with we, letting them go on. The
owners themselves don’t seem to know
better and are happily ensconced in their
snob envelope, while, others less lucky
mortals are unhappy and grumbling.

The revenge is already complete.

70
Self as the Benchmark.

How subjective can we get? That we tend to

take decisions and act on what is convenient
and understandable to us and within our
experience is not just a theory. Practical
experience has proven it again and again.

In the early 70s I had just put my first foot

forward in the professional arena and had
come to settle in Delhi. The Lord in his
kindness gave me a good start and I rented a
small 2 room flat for my bachelor self in a so
called “posh” colony. I had grand plans and I
was of the belief that a good start was half
the journey. Success comes to those who
“seem” successful. Plus I had the definite
making of a snob and dinghy places were not
for me. I was paying a princely sum of Rs 250
per month which happened to be at that
time the average monthly income of an
Indian. My ancestral home town being only
35 miles away from Delhi, I paid my cousins a
visit. Of course they had millions of
questions. The principle question was about
the rent I was paying. In my simple childish
honesty I told them the truth; and instantly
the next statement I heard was “Leave it.
You won’t be able to keep it”. Nobody in the
family hitherto had done anything like living

71
on rent when he could have easily lived with
a relative or even stayed put in the small
town and commuted daily. Just imagine
making it out on one’s own and not listening
to one’s elders?! Not even asking for their
advice!!

This is a simple example of negative thinking

from my point of view. Why always ponder
on the failure? I admit that often I was hard
pressed for cash and sometimes even
borrowed to pay the rent but it all worked
out in the end. My well-to-do family could
equally well have said, “Fine. If you ever
need something, we are here”. But no;
encouragement and courageously venturing
out is not our style. We want to play safe.
We pride ourselves in our stable and staid
thinking and behavior. Over ambitious acts
are for the foolhardy. Good sense advises us
to remain within well laid out boundaries and
wherever possible stick to the straight,
narrow and the obvious. No wonder then that
the once rich landowners are today selling
off their lands to make ends meet.

I remember the HMT brand of watches. In our

younger days it was a highly respected brand
and then all of a sudden it started
disappearing from the buyer’s wish lists.
What was the reason? I don’t really know for

72
sure but what I heard was that the top
management was acting as the designer of
the final models being launched in the
market and of course their tastes being the
benchmark, their selections were plagued by
subjective choices. I suppose it never
occurred to the top bosses that they were
fine engineers, gradually promoted to top
management posts in a manufacturing unit
and that although very superior when
compared to the common man, their market
savvy was incomplete. The aspirations of the
buyers were never considered. No market
survey ever conducted. It was a monopoly
and being a government run organization,
the focus was “for the poor” whereas the
money was with the richer class. So evidently
the actual buyers defected and today the
brand has shut shop.

This is a kind of reverse negative thinking;

when you do all the right things for the
wrong reasons. This is because all the
decisions are taken while remaining within
the confines of one’s own subjective comfort
zone. Is it so difficult to see that the first
principle of marketing is to find out what
“they” want and give it to them?

A little peep into our lives will show umpteen

instances where we did the right thing by our

73
perspective, never taking into consideration
any other factor. This always happens when
subjective thinking is at work and our
arrogance blinds us to any other possibility as
impractical and impossible. Lately an
advertisement is on the TV which shows a
young lady going to great effort and paying a
good price for a pair of jeans with the “used
& torn” look. She comes home and places the
brand new jeans on her bed. Her mother
passes by, sees it and promptly takes it and
stitches it up to make it more respectable,
with absolute conviction that when the young
lady finds it out, she would certainly be
pleased.

In the office, this kind of thinking will result

in frustrations and expensive forays. To think
that one may not be always right may seem
negative but it is truly very positive. It shows
a maturity that goes for good management.
This will promote discussions and open ended
discussions always result in new data coming
forth. What is then required is to be positive
enough to immediately change tack and
incorporate the new data in one’s decision
making. Thinking out of the box is I think the
latest term for tangential thinking.

I remember one incident with a firm where I

was a visiting consultant. I was asked to

74
research the market on the pricing and
packaging. My final assessment did not
please the owner of the unit. He did not feel
that I understood the ground realities very
well of doing business. He comes from
another field of expertise and was very
successful in it. He copied the packaging
from a pack from abroad and priced his
product based on what he considered a good
price, the price calculation based solely on
the factor of his own preference and his own
ability and readiness to pay for the said
product. Needless to say the product and the
whole project bombed. For all his business
and international exposure, it never occurred
to him that his view of the market is
blinkered by his lifestyle. He is more used to
moving in upper-class stores in AC comfort
and higher priced products while his buyers
would be from another class altogether and
by using himself as the benchmark, he was
dooming the project.

Failures there will always be. They are part

of the learning process. And hopefully they
can be kept in the limits of what can be
called “affordable”. Negative thinking is the
mother of procrastination. Procrastination
means that there is no urgent need to reach
a goal but rather “seem” to be doing; appear
busy and seriously involved; a very self-

75
defeating attitude. Considering that we have
only a limited number of years on this
planet, whatever work can be avoided is a
goal in itself. Again the whole attitude is
very personal and if that is convenient to the
procrastinator, who are we to criticize?

My question is can we really run away from

life? One day I was visiting somebody in the
hospital; there I noticed a weeping group.
Out of curiosity, I asked an attendant what
had transpired. It seems the lady being
operated upon had breathed her last on the
operating table. The doctor in question being
a friend I asked him what went wrong. It
seems that the family had been avoiding the
operation for seven years in the fear that the
unthinkable may happen. The sickly lady was
on her last legs and it is then the family
decided to go for the operation as a last
resort. They had come around too late.
There just was not enough strength and vital
life force in the lady to sustain the stress of
the operation. I wonder why they went in for
the operation after all; was it to show to the
world that they were doing as much as could
be done even when fate was against them?

Positive thinking and curiosity go together.

Curiosity is the mother of learning. Learning
results in enhancement of our quality of life

76
if we put what has been learnt into practice.
When the turn came in my own family to
operate or not, this old story came to mind
and we did not hesitate. We are all happy
now as the decision was well taken and
everything turned out very well indeed.

77
Snuffing Them Out Softly.

Thirty years ago I made friends with a

carpenter and the relationship was kept alive
by both of us because I had many odd jobs
always at hand and the carpenter always
could be counted on to be there. He is of
Muslim faith but when I needed somebody to
find me a priest for solemnizing my sister’s
wedding, he, NIZAM, did the job and in the
Grih Prevesh puja, he was there too with a
priest that he had brought. He was always a
fine reliable man with an open mind and a
happy friendly disposition. Yet his disposition
did not extend to his children. This is
something I have found difficult to
understand. With them he was the absolute
monarch and kept them on a tight leash.
Their training was limited and their
education was stunted. They were never
allowed to think or act for themselves. The
principle of “REGARDS” towards the elders
was so well embedded that there was an
aura of total obedience in the air. Of course,
today, Nizam has had to retire to his small
farm holding and it is the sons who work. By
good fortune, my relationship with the family
has continued and I am considered part of
their extended family. The son takes care of
all my odd job needs and more.

78
Yet there is a sad extension to this story. The
ability of the son is awfully limited. His
learning process is severely stunted.
Instructions tend to disappear from his
memory within 24 hours. Everyday you have
to reinstruct him and he rarely learns from
his experiences. When I see people like him,
I think of a calculator versus a computer. His
mind is like a calculator without a memory.
He lacks exposure of any kind outside what
he has learnt from his father. His abilities are
almost as if I am dealing with a person from
the 60s or you can say a younger Nizam. As a
child he was bright and exuberant but
nothing of that child is to be seen. The God-
given lively and energetic personality has
been totally erased. The goodwill remains
but the thinking and learning part of the
persona has disappeared. Where did it go?
And I suppose this has been happening over
the ages from father to son as if locked in
time.

I would have thought it is easy to love and

the sheer joy in the eyes of a child would
melt the toughest heart. Till the age of two
the child is treated as a soft toy and all the
affection we are capable of is given to it. I
suppose the problem begins after this stage.
The ever growing child starts becoming
independent and this is where we are unable

79
to reconcile ourselves. We saw it as a baby
under our total care and we wish to continue
seeing it this way. We have to steel ourselves
to grow with the situation and allow the
child to grow in his own God-given
parameters.

The truth is no one even thinks of this as a

situation. Every individual sees himself as
perfect and introspection is hardly the forte
of human beings. Righteousness mixed with
judgmental attitudes and the law-given
rights of the parents permitting absolute
control over the child blinds us to the
relative personalities that we all have. I
wonder in how many people the thought
even remotely creates a shadow of doubt
that we may be wrong and the child is not an
extension of ourselves. When we are dealing
with a child, why do we let go of all self-
restraints? In extreme cases parents have
known to indulge in monstrous acts and when
confronted they have always justified
themselves. How come they do not see the
suffering they are causing?

I have noticed this phenomena in other

better provided families too. As a teacher I
have seen that bright spark go out by the
time a child reaches class 8 or so. The keen
and enquiring character of the child gets

80
taken over by a tendency more in the nature
of calculating and manipulating. The desire
to excel gets superimposed by the mundane.
What happened? Where is the lacuna in our
upbringing and educating that fine, bright,
wide eyed, curiosity filled and intelligent
children turn into people so much lesser than
their possibilities?

My own way of seeing is that, adults make

life so difficult for the child that the child
soon learns to do everything to please the
elders. This conditioning is total. An element
of insincerity enters into the character which
becomes one of the strongest traits. Soon life
becomes a clash of wills between the child
and his elders.

I remember a sticker, I saw when younger. It

showed an angry looking father saying to his
child- “The answer is NO. Now what did you
want?” Do we really leave any choices to the
child?

The conditioning begins to take hold in the

very early formative stages. The minds are
badgered into submission as taught in our
societies to think not, speak not, show no
initiative but simply do as they are told and
learn by rote whatever the teachers tell
them. All expressions of curiosity and

81
activities of exploration and experimentation
so studiously discouraged earlier, now form
their personality. Even the best intentioned
parent is unable to let go. Any vestige of
individuality is systematically squeezed out
of them. How often have you noticed that
when you ask a question of the child, it is the
parent who answers? The fine connection
between the conscious thinking brain and
new experiences that results in a thinking
and consciously growing human being is
snuffed out of existence.

We need to teach them to think for

themselves and NOT tell them what to think.

We forget that children are given to us for

bringing up and not as possessions. Of course
as babies they need total dedication and
care. But how can we forget that as they
grow they are also becoming persons in their
own right? These poor unfortunates have had
their memory and learning boxes virtually
removed almost as if surgically. These are
supposed to be the fine young men and
women we are helping out to mature and
grow up as the adults of tomorrow.

Eventually life will make them acutely aware

of their limitations but what can be done?
It’s too late to start all over again. The

82
mental make up is strongly in place and the
demands of life leave no space. Emotional
immaturity will only be adding to the woes.
What we have brought up is a confused and
unsure adult with an unrealistic ego. The
parents will eventually realize this truth
sometime well in their old age when the
habits and attitudes that they have instilled
in their wards come to haunt them in their
own lives. The circle is then complete and
pain is everywhere.

Even if these people wanted, they would not

know how to get out of this impasse. It is no
wonder that o many are landing up on the
psychiatrist’s couch. The good natured ones
bumble along and the ones with a strong
amour propre take refuge in forever
justifying themselves, rationalizing and on
the defensive if not outright arguing
whenever there is any need for the brain to
make an effort at listening and learning.
What is to be expected of them? Not much.

The cycle of this continuing education from

parent to child and onwards on to the coming
generation has to be somehow derailed. It
would have been best done in our schools,
away from possessive parents but
unfortunately the schools are being run by
adults with the same mind set and the entire

83
school programs have been subverted and
fashioned to be an extension of this same
style of upbringing. There is little conscious
effort to run the schools for the child with
only the child’s personal growth in focus. We
are bringing up virtual zombies; something in
the nature of the Bonsai plants – finely
truncated! Then when in adult life, our
zombies do not show much creativity or
initiative, we berate them for it. What can
we expect from young people who have only
been taught to run back to their parents for
every single thought or action? It is a cycle of
“Stifling and Berating” that never ends and
the same carries on from generation to
generation.

How shall we break this vicious cycle?

84
Show some courage

For once I have something nice to say. It is

about this advertisement I saw. The scene
takes place in a public transport bus. A rough
looking guy is standing by a girl who is
seated. His hand gravitates towards her in an
unwanted and definitely unsolicited caress.
Now this is a situation which takes place
everyday umpteen of times in the buses of
Delhi and I suppose elsewhere. Things can
even get worse with bottom-pinching or
more. Normally most of the crowd avoids
speaking up as nobody wants to confront the
ruffian element. This of course permits eve-
teasers to get away with a lot. But in this
advert an elderly man speaks up. I believe
this is what we need to project and become
conscious of. The old man remonstrates and
the lout responds by saying that it was the
fault of his unruly hand which slipped by on
its own. So the elderly man responds by
giving him a stinging slap and when the
shocked Romeo looks at him, the old man
quietly says the same thing: It was the fault
of the hand – it slipped! If only more of us
would have the courage to acknowledge and
speak up. What are we afraid of? Why do we
let so much in our lives to happen even when
we are seething inside? We keep our anger

85
confined to discussions in our drawing rooms.
If we were true to ourselves we would
certainly refuse to take all that we consider
nonsense as quietly and docilely as we do.

Why are we Indians so afraid to call a spade

a spade and pick up cudgels? We normally
take the opposite stance and try to hush up
things.

In comparison at the other end of the

spectrum is this little conversation I had. I
was talking about our tendency to be
oblivious to the presence of others. We love
rubbing shoulders and cut the path of others
as if the other is simply not there. I was
relating a particular instance when I was in
the very busy and highly crowded market
place of Sarojini Nagar Market in Delhi. I was
having my six month old child in a sling and
of course it was a little hard to protect her
from all the shoving and hitting which we are
prone to. To protect my baby from being
hurt I was keeping my arms around her with
my elbows outward. Yet one lady came
barging up the alley totally blind to our
existence and my elbow connected with her
ribs. At this she woke up. Looked at us with
annoyance and then had the grace to realize
that she could have hurt the baby and quietly
walked away.

86
But my listener kept on commenting as if
trying to calm me down by saying things like
“It was not intentional, she must have been
occupied with other things on her mind, who
would want to hurt a child and such”. Like a
good lawyer that my listener is, she kept on
trying to rationalize the act. Finally in
exasperation I had to pose the question as to
why she was so ardently batting for that
woman as if she was her defense lawyer.
Why was she not ready to accept my analysis
of the situation? Why was it so important to
placate me and make me think otherwise?

We like brush irritants under the carpet.

What is stopping us from accepting the fact
that we do tend to live and move about as if
we alone exist. The first step towards
correcting a fault is to accept it. But we
never look the problem in the eye. We take
great pains to avoid problem-solving and our
hoping has far more depth than our attempt
to think things through and live with planning
and circumspection.

There is an element of carelessness and

irresponsibility in everything and every
aspect of our lives and we are extremely
comfortable with it.

87
THE ILLUSION OF VIRTUE.

Of all the tricks of illusion we get to see, this

is the biggest that humanity has played on
itself. What an absolute control it has on
everybody’s sight and mind. Even if
somebody helps us see through the whole
game, the chances are that we would still
like to keep our eyes closed and live with the
illusion. How do I begin to explain myself?
Since the beginning of time males and the
females of the species have been playing
with each other. What harm could there be
in it? Yet somewhere along the way certain
values were established and the play came
under the rules and regulations of elders who
promptly called it a sin. This gave them the
right to censure and control the lives of their
brethren. The brethren for some reason
found it perfectly alright as the men
specially could call the shots and control the
lives of their women and possessions, and
women acquiesced because it suited them
too in some pervert way.

This was not the only rule that took the form
of sin or/and virtue but definitely the most
mind arresting. These rules of what are sins
and what is not virtuous rules our lives to
such an extent that we have forgotten to live

88
our lives. The only concept that matters is to
be seen to be virtuous. A little introspection
will show us that most of our actions are
based on our need to be seen as virtuous. A
deeper look around will show us how in the
name of doing good for the good of others we
meddle in the lives of others and give birth
to hurt and mishaps. It even absolves us
from looking at ourselves and improving
ourselves which is “the” tragedy of human
existence to my way of thinking. Once we
are in this mode we can so conveniently keep
on pointing fingers at others and in
comparison seem so wondrously divine.

Let us begin with the legal aspect of illegal

activities. Things and activities which are
personal and were giving no trouble to
anyone suddenly became illegal and gave the
police a baton to wave around. This power
has often seen to have gone to their heads
and they misuse it for their own pleasure or
show of virtue. Have you noticed with what
glee they announce that they have broken a
prostitution ring? Come to think of it, how
much detective prowess is needed to find an
entry into a madam’s “kotha”? This class of
work which was once an indispensable part
of the cultured life which gave rise to such
eminent dancers and singers like Umrao Jaan
is today bearing the brunt of the moral police

89
and often creating situations where the
constabulary is able to get away with rape.

There are of course other institutions that

have legalized this profession because it
suited the rulers. We are all aware of the
institution of temple “dassi” where the
damsel is married to the Lord and dances for
him and is bedded by His servants. Then take
the very common institution of marriage in
which more women are battered than they
are cherished. If it is legal it is fine. Even
fathers get away with rape of their daughters
because it is happening within the confines
of the marriage and the laws permit no
interference here in the name of virtue and
sanctity of marriage. The whole society looks
on and calls it a personal matter.

Had it not been for the laws, we would not

have so much of the police force wasting
their time in stopping such innocuous
activities and also wasting scarce resources
of both the judiciary and the detective force.
But I suppose it suits everybody. A huge
trade is based on this illegality with huge
sums involved. Trading in women,
enslavement and stealing of children are just
some of the activities that I can mention;
add to this side dishes like illegal distilling
and use of alcoholic drinks, pornography and

90
pedophile activities and you will see what a
witch’s brew we have here.

I wonder if the law makers ever give thought

to the disaster they are giving rise to when
they make a law. Take for instance the
crack down on marijuana. This has been the
staple diet of the common man for centuries
and no rule ever condemned it. But the new-
age governments have ruled it as obnoxious
and made it illegal; one would think they
would relent when it has been conclusively
proven that it helps seriously sick patients in
controlling their pain. But no, they are too
virtuous to let such nefarious products to
contaminate our lives! Other strong opiates
are so stringently controlled that the sums
involved in successfully trafficking them go
into astronomical figures. The temptation to
trade in it is too great for the frail spirit of
human-kind to resist. There is a concerted
effort by the traffickers to hook people and
create clients for them. If only the law
makers would get off their virtuous backsides
and understand that this is not the way to go
about it. It is their stupid laws and little
understanding of applied psychology that is
making this planet a vice-den. Yet cigarette
smoking is ok even with all the data saying it
is really the most hurtful of human activities
today.

91
India has one of the most stringent laws in
the world regarding what women can do to
fight for their rights. The anti-dowry and
harassment laws are draconian to say the
least. Beware of your wife. If she gets into
the mood to play a fast one on you, all she
has to do is to call the police and after that
the legal machinery takes over. They arrest
you and your immediate family and put you
behind bars first for a week at least and then
only ask questions. Investigations are more
from the point of view to nail the man rather
than find out if there is any basis of truth in
the allegations. The whole process works on
the basis that if the weaker sex is
complaining there has to be some truth in it.
After all only the male of the species is
known to be malicious. Women on the other
hand are made of sugar and spice and all
things nice. It is another matter that it is
now common knowledge that more often
than not whenever a woman is upset and
looking for her demands to be met, she is
using the police and judiciary to harass and
threaten the man into submission if she can.

The list of such misplaced and misunderstood

actions is long and can be seen in every
phase of life. That parents are loving and
cherish their children is one myth. That

92
beggars are forced into begging because they
are without other options is another. When
we go to temples to bribe the Lord into
granting our wishes and then save our souls
by giving alms to the beggars outside, do we
ever stop and wonder that it is an organized
syndicate at work? There are of course
exceptions so let’s not get into an argument.
It is also true that our virtuous conduct has
given rise to a profession and a very
unscrupulous group of people who indulge in
stealing children, maiming them, and turning
them into professional beggars and then live
on their proceeds. Don’t think that beggars
don’t pay taxes and are free to roam. They
have territories and whatever administrative
authority is in control of that territory, takes
their cut from them. Many beggars are rich
beyond their needs; miserliness having
become a habit. So much for our virtuous
conduct! If you are a believer in Karma, then
think again; what are you really reaping?!!

50 years ago, the only touch with the outside

world an individual had in India and many
other countries for that matter, was through
the cinema. This was not only a land where
fantasies were played out, but where people
met and asked each other out. It was the
central focus of our society. Young
impressionable minds were certainly

93
affected. Remember the tight fitting clothes
of Asha Parekh, the sexual innuendoes of
Mala Sinha and the gyrations of the
inimitable Helen? At heart we all dreamt of
meeting such a girl. Remember the bravado
of the heroes whom we then went on to
emulate; the antics of Shammi kapoor, the
villainous designs of Pran and the inhumanity
of the zamindars. What the youth saw they
repeated. Their conversation, dress and
attitudes all reflected the topics as
delineated on the silver screen. Most theft
cases of the complex kind were later
discovered to have origins in the seeing of a
film. The films gave ideas and the under-
developed minds of the masses lapped it up.
Whole generations were brought up on the
staple fare of the cinemas. This was in those
times when society was more conservative
than it is today and I can say, more tolerant
too. Otherwise will somebody explain to me
why no voices were raised when the boys
teased the girls and pulled at their dupattas?
Why the cabaret dances in drinking bars were
never blocked from being screened? What
was the law saying then and where was the
censor board? Even when the teasing scenes
became more violent, nobody raised their
voices. This was what two whole generations
of youth saw and of course, found it
acceptable. And now that we have entered

94
the 21st century, suddenly the Indians have
found religion in its worst form and
intolerance too. With religion have come the
moral brigades and the violence of people
who refuse to let others live their own lives.
The truth is that we have ourselves to blame
with our virtuous, saintly non-interfering
outlook. Now it is too late. The script has
been lost and it will have to be written all
over again. The tragedy is that the TV and
the pulp media are adding to the fire.
Nothing is left to the imagination. It is even
getting to be boring. But the fact remains
that the average human is in a state of
constant titillation. The young ladies in real
life with their dresses or the lack of it are
making it worse. It seems that they have a
right to titillate but the young men are
expected to maintain a saintly self-
discipline. I maintain that our elders have
failed us; they have failed in showing the
way and instilling in their young the
discrimination needed to wander in this wide
wicked world.

In many countries, in the last century, virtue

reared its head in the form of “Prohibition”
to stop both manufacture and consumption
of alcohol. Every time it only increased the
illegal activity in its manufacture and

95
consumption and unscrupulous elements
made hay while it lasted. Yet every time a
vote-catching line is needed, prohibition is
the answer and is practiced every now then
by our state governments. We never seem to
learn. The voters fall for it every time and
the leaders are always willing because it not
only brings them to power but becomes a
source of income as they prove to be the
biggest behind-the-scene law-breakers.

Ever notice how often everything in life is

done only for your good? You would have
heard this explanation from parents, elders,
kin, teachers and associates at work. Never
does anyone ever say that they are doing it
because they want to and that there is more
often than not their own gratification or
profit in it. From the sound of it, we are all
living very saintly lives, with no ulterior
motives at all.

We can be very mistaken and very misguided

in our actions and decisions quite often. The
man who comes to clean our car every
morning, the other day, in the middle of the
severest winter, was coughing away. I
observed this for some days on and on and
then wave of “virtue” overwhelmed me. So I
took out one of my sweaters and gave him to
wear it. But I found to my surprise that he

96
was not wearing it. Neither that day nor the
days after; after a week, I could not resist
asking him as to why he was not wearing it.
His reply brought me back down to earth
with a thud; he had given it away!

At a more personal and mundane level let me

tell you about a recent happening that shook
me. We have among our midst a lady who is
for ever ready with her time, advice and
sometimes even money to help others. How
virtuous! She did manage to acquire some
qualifications of a higher order and rose even
to the position of a director in some not so
important school. This has made her vanity
go right berserk. She is so visibly of the kind
who knows all the answers even when they
have no clue to the questions. Wherever and
whenever she gets the opportunity, she is all
ready to take over and make a mess of
things. She is so busy in being seen as the
virtuous do-gooder that she even gets angry
if we give her the no-thank-you shake. As
one of the adult in the family, out of respect
many people did let her get away with it
which has only stoked her intentions. Well
the story is of this woman and a favorite
niece of hers. As she was always there to
think and do for the niece to the degree that
I and you would call it imposing oneself, the
niece grew up to depend upon her for

97
everything to the point she was seen by all of
us as a complete lulu. Eventually all said and
done, the niece got married, separated due
to the continued interference of the family
and came to live with her father with her
daughter. Things were not going well at all.

One day she fell sick with fever. Her father,

a very authoritarian figure who presupposes
that everyone is shamming and a louse, did
not take it seriously and although she was
taken to the doctor, it was all done very
casually. After all as he said later, she had
been sick a year ago too. She was lying alone
at home. Then I suppose things got serious
and there was nobody to call upon so the
niece called her favorite aunt. It was late
evening and the aunt in her wisdom rang her
doctor friend who she was unable to contact.
So she let things be and took up the matter
in the morning. By then the father had also
come around to see that things were really
amiss. By the time the ambulance arrived the
girl had already breathed her last having
been infected by dengue. Unfortunately the
story does not end here. The father and aunt
have shaken off the episode by putting the
blame squarely on “fate”. Now they are
devoting their energies on the hapless 10
years old daughter who is the only one really
mourning the passing of her mother. This girl

98
will now bear the full impact of their
virtuous guardianship without any mitigating
factors.

I am of the firm belief, had the girl had a

more compassionate father, and the aunt
had not made her life so easy by saving her
from all effort of action and thought, she
could have grown into a more self reliant
person and would have been alive and well
today.

99
The Language Conundrum

The British went all over the world to bring

culture to the natives. Now the natives are
no more comfortable to stay home. They
want to go to England too. From a Royal
Kingdom, England is now a multi-racial
country. All this is fine but the problem is
that the culturally deficient people that the
British tried to upgrade have now a topsy-
turvy relationship with the English language.
They are bringing more of themselves to
Britain and to English than the British most
probably ever bargained for.

Everyone is not privy to a classical education

which the English language needs so that it
can be fully appreciated. In my 40 years of
teaching I have seen a gradual simplification
of the language. Now I realize that these
changes are here to stay and it is useless to
term them as “poor-grasp-of-the-language”
and let things lie there. Students are learning
a mistaken form of the language right from
the start and by the time they realize that
their grasp of the language is weak, too
many ingrained habits leave them no room
for improvement.

100
The English language is too complex to
become a proper universal language as it is
today in its pure Queen’s form. Ask the
Queen herself; see how her Lords are hashing
up “Her” language and she can do nothing.
Yet she is compelled by circumstances to
make “Lords” with antecedents in South East
Asia or some other place from her previous
colonies.

In my 40 years of teaching I have seen many

adaptations that are merrily in use. Some of
the adaptations are brilliant and eye-
openers; and I say why not make them
permanent? For instance take the problem of
tenses. There so many verbs and so many
different forms. Why?

I had a student who wanted to improve his

language command so that he could migrate
to Canada. He had his schooling in a
prestigious Public School of Delhi in the
medium of English. After 15 years of
schooling and 3 years of college he had only
learnt an English of his own invention.

As an example let me give you his rendering

of the tenses; his simplification has a certain
genius to it. I raise my hat to him. I asked
him to conjugate the verb TALK in the three

101
simple tenses of Future, Present and Past.
This is what I got:
I will talk, I am talk and I was talk.
This he did with all verbs without exception.
And I said to myself –“But this is wonderful.
There is nothing left for me to teach. This
boy can manage any verb”. Let’s learn
something from him and universalize this
grand development.

Another problem is in the use of the active

and passive voice. The students with
language abilities from their vernacular
education simply do not see the difference
between “She will kill” and “She will be
killed”.

The numbers of properly trained teachers are

really not coming up. Faultily trained
teachers are getting to teach new comers
who are learning even less and more faultily.
If the English language has to be properly
universalized and made really common then
we need to learn from these adaptations and
incorporate them. So much will be
simplified!

102
Tradition, Modernism & Reality

Recently I received a forward speaking about

how age old crafts are being lost and how the
industrialization is pushing the old artists
into abject poverty. This concern was
brought up by foreigners from the western
developed world who are hopefully really
trying to keep the traditional arts alive. I
give few lines from the same:

This sari design, which has been in Javed's

family for 100 years, can take up to two
months to weave. Patterns like these have
been a source of Indian pride for more than
2,000 years, with India's version of haute
couture adorning wealthy women of the
empires of Rome, Egypt and Persia. Until
recently, weaving was India's second-most-
common occupation, after farming.

"This loom will be in a museum," said Javed's

despairing uncle, Nazir Ahmed, 30, whose
family was forced to shut down 12 of their 14
looms. "We would have never predicted this.
We were India's artists. Now we are living in
poverty."

103
India also lacks a social security system,
leaving weavers, farmers and others
vulnerable to market forces.

In response my friend Mr A Vajpai has this to

say and I agree with him:

Modern India is far too aggressive now on the

International scenario, and there is no reason
why it should slow down (get bogged down)
by a culture which produces at best only
items meant for the richest of the rich, who
can afford such hand woven stuff.

To change and adapt oneself in a competitive

world is the key to economic and social
progress - and not to continue with
something which is bound to become
outdated and outmoded and which would
render us obsolete. Adapt or perish - that's
the mantra.

Art must certainly continue and prosper, as

art, and not as a livelihood in the name of
tradition if you can’t make it pay. Of course
we cannot allow the designs and artistry to
die out.

The biggest bane of the Indian society has

been the unrelenting population

104
growth - for whatever reasons. Can anyone
imagine what would have been the per
capita income if only we had contained
ourselves? Now, that this nation has found
other areas of expertise to challenge the
world at large, it has begun pinching
everyone for obvious reasons. Is this a ploy to
keep us tied down and behind the times?

Worldwide, the social and economic status

will balance itself out by some newer means,
so let it take it's normal course.

My own comments are:

My experience when trying to help the less

educated has been rather depressing. There
is a resistance to change that creeps in even
with the first sentence exchanged. When this
is coupled with our tendency to take short-
cuts and soft options, we push ourselves into
a hole and then pine and mope. Let me just
enunciate some points:

- Refusal to see the misery we are

propagating by having more and more
children even when our own cupboards are
empty. We see children only as eventual
insurance for old age. How the child will be
fed and educated for the next 20 years is not
taken into calculation.

105
- Our socio economic environment is such
that it spoils the boy child and burdens the
girl. Most often it is the girls who keep the
household provided for while the boys
become loafers.
- Lack of proper nutrition results in stunted
growth; both in the visible state of the body
and worse in the internal organs that we do
not see.
- Lack of stimulation and exposure results in
visionless and aimless youngsters without
mental development even of the basic kind.
The underdevelopment of the brain is a
reality. Their ability to learn and improve
themselves is totally lacking.
- By association the only trade they ever
learn in their "learning" period is the one
from their father. They have no other
recourse but to follow the trade.
- Their lack of “savoir faire” means they
have to work for middlemen who are earning
handsomely even in this shrinking market.
Had these artisans spent some time planning
their own education and future, things would
be quite different.
- Before you know what, the children are
married off and some more children, "Gift of
God" appear to feed and care for which the
necessities are simply non existent.
- The dreams sold by our celluloid world and
now by the TV, giving a totally wrong

106
impression about the realities of life. Instead
of showing the way, it is emotionalizing
everything and leaving it there. Most of the
Indian population is learning from these and
patterning their lives wholly on the
perverted nonsense they see through the
medium of films and soaps on TV.
- There is nobody to guide them or show the
way. Especially the different norms and
practices of different social classes and so
they remain unaccepted by their peers and
ignorant of business practices.
- The art and artists merit all the help
possible but not as doles. Let’s record it all
for posterity and let Institutions like the
Victoria Institute of Chennai keep the art
alive.
- The Govt can only play a limited role. We
have to take responsibility for our own lives.
-

107
The WHYs behind the whys.

I read recently that people from lesser

privileged backgrounds like the ghettos,
jhuggi- jhopdis etc are more prone to
violence than others from better & cleaner
environments; the operative word being
“cleaner, more attractive, well organized
and kept and maintained surroundings.

Here is a piece of news that we should all be

sitting up and taking note of. There are so
many similar related traits that I have
pondered on and analyzed. How we carry the
environments like a metal plated coat on our
shoulders is not always appreciated although
to my eyes is plainly obvious. Understanding
of this phenomenon would help HR and our
own relationships both personal and
professional.

Now the question – “why”. Why do they

behave this way?

Let’s try and understand these actions more

in the spirit of starting a discussion than
deep psychological unraveling to prove
anything. Let me take up a few:

108
There is all the open space on the road.
But the other guy still does not find
enough space and bumps into you.

This is the way they feel comfortable and

justify their individuality and their being
there. These unfortunate people have known
only cramped surroundings that accord them
no pride or individuality with little or no
space of their own. They have never been
alone. Living in cramped and often dirty
surroundings with no respite in sight and with
an underlying subconscious thought that life
has dealt them a miserable hand.

There is a lot of empty space to park the

car but the guy still double parks and
blocks the road for everybody.

Self importance makes them want to be seen

always in a hurry. They take the shortest
rout from one point to another, even
overtake at curves and from the left or go
over the other half of the road; so
importantly they have to park right opposite
the gate and subconsciously the only way
they can attract attention is by being a bit of
nuisance.

109
There is a Q at the milk booth but he still
tries to push his hand over others to be
served first.

He is supremely comfortable in his own

persona. Nobody else exists. He does not see
anyone else. I was at the booth and this
young lad came and tried to go over
everybody, specially a small servant girl. I
stopped him and told him flatly that he shall
have to wait his turn; his answered saying
that he did not see the girl. They live so
much in a world where they are the single
most important person that they
automatically become blind to everyone
else. Then cheating is part of life; is it not?

He sees the well kept courtyard and the

first thing he does is spit in front of the
front door before entering.

The poor guy is really showing off his good

manners; that before entering the house he
was clearing his throat and all. It is not his
fault that he has never known a clean
“front” as part of one’s image. The street
where he lives is the principal common drain
too of the locality. A beautiful front as part
of character of the home is too far away

110
from his conception of things. He has only
learnt to see his smashing handsome self in
the mirror and he is very impressed by his
image.

The whole sleeping compartment is asleep

in the train and two people wake up in the
morning and start talking and guffawing.

In their common life nobody has ever

respected their privacy. The concept simply
does not exist in their personas. They have
known dirt, neglect and are acutely aware
that for a few minutes of romp their parents
have endowed them a life-time of misery. If
they manage to get out of their abject
surroundings, they have to let the world
know it and it never occurred to them that
what they are so loudly announcing to the
world is not of interest to anybody or very
commonplace too..

He can very well talk inside his house

which is big enough and everything but
still he prefers to come out on the balcony
and regale everybody with his important

111
conversation; loud enough to be heard
three houses away.

He has risen in the world. How else shall he

show it? In his childhood the family was
scrounging with 400 rupees a month. Now he
is making 40 thousand or more. It is cause for
blowing the trumpet. The problems arise
more when in today’s world you are raised
and brought in one environment and then
cash availability technically raises your level
of social center but the habits acquired
earlier and the concepts ingrained in early
days do not go away and more often than not
are not even understood or realized.

He walks nonchalantly in the middle of the

road, stops to chat or whatever but
always dead in the middle of the road.

For this we need to study a bit of

anthropology. Since ages when we were
living with many more animals and wilder
spaces, we have this instinctive need to
protect ourselves from predators by staying
away from any tree or boulder as far as
possible. Where there is no option we stay as
much in the centre of the open space. This is
still in our make-up. We could take it as an

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indication of how wild are our perceptions
and therefore our reactions.

Doors are never closed behind them nor

goods ever replaced at their appointed
places. Fans and lights never put off.

Be it an almirah/cupboard, or the front door.

They will take the trouble to open them
because otherwise they can’t get to what
they want. But once their business is done,
they will let things be for others to take care
of the rearranging. Well they grew up in an
ambience of total pampering by their elders.
They did not have doors and things to worry
about anyway. Then eventually all these
habits become part of their fixed nature.

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A Bit on the Wild Side.

Holidays in the wilds make a lot of sense;

Specially when one is living and working in
the urban jungle among some of the most
outrageously wild people and situations, as
most of the live-by-wire do. Going back to
the simplicity of the wild is therapeutic to
say the least.

Where can you go? Here are some

suggestions:

KAZIRANGA

Just reach Guwahati by any means and take

the road to Dibrurgarh. Try not to miss the
turn to the left to Kaziranga. Hopefully you
have chosen a solid land cruiser type of
vehicle because don’t forget that you are
now in Rhino country. Not that the Rhinos
care much for human company and their
puny vehicles. The Indian Rhino is king here
and knows it. Nevertheless do take time out
to check on your vehicle’s insurance, if it
does cover an attack by a two ton Rhino
tank.

The best option is to take the morning

elephant safari. It is the safest mode of

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transport in the tall grass, which can
sometimes grow up to 10-12 feet. Arm
yourself with a good camera with a high ISO.
You’ll regret it if you don’t.

PERIYAR WILDLIFE SANCTUARY

This is the place for solitude rather than the

animals. This sanctuary is a lovely corner
around the Periyar artificial lake built
sometime by the British to provide water to
Madurai. Kerala Tourism has a two-hour Ferry
safari that is very enjoyable. There is also a
lot of ground to cover for the footloose but
the chances that you will really see any
animals is not very high.

To reach you could fly through Kochi. From

there it is a 4-hour drive.

RANTHAMBORE

This is the most talked about Tiger reserve in

India. The Fort of Ranthambore itself is a
legendary spot. Because of the peculiarity of
the terrain, there is a lot of open space and
a lot of dry ground. This results in many
interesting and memorable viewings of the

115
animals in their natural habitat. If you are
lucky you may even see a chase or kill.

There are vehicle safaris, a little restricted

in their movement for safety but still
something to go for. Besides the tiger, there
are leopards and owls and foxes and so many
other animals. But please remember this is
wildlife country, for the animals - not you, so
you need to respect their privacy and not
shock them with spotlights, noise and such.
Do keep your camera ready with a proper
200-300mm telephoto lens though. Who
knows you may capture a picture that a good
journal would love to print.

You can reach Ranthambore by road or train.

The nearest town is Sawaimadhopur.

BANDHAVGARH

This is unique as a place. It is really the

place to go to if you want to feel close to
natural wildlife in contrast to the urban
wildlife. Think of tigers who couldn’t care a
whit about the hordes of humans all the
time. Think also of bears, hyenas, along with
chital, sambar, wild boars and langurs. When
you get to the top of the fort, you have a
reached a bird watcher’s paradise. Hope your
camera is up to the task!

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This place is reached by train via Umaria or
Satna

KANHA

This is where you don’t see the crowds

‘doing’ wildlife! This is the place where,
when you enter the forest, you can go back
hundred of years in time.

To reach Kanha, go to Jabalpur. From there

on, allow the Toursism Dept to take over.

117
TIRED for Nothing.

My wife is one of the pillars of our country.

She works so that people like me can enjoy a
life of bliss. I am definitely one of the
hangers-on; living away from the hustle-
bustle of modern day life and
inconveniences. I am so used to the calm and
silences in my life that getting out of the
house seems like being dropped in a
cauldron. The down side of living as a
hanger-on is that we have to go where we
are lead. So outings are decided by the time
availability of my wife and I am taken along
for the convenience; after all somebody has
to drive the car, hold the baby and the bags,
give technical advice on goods and products
and if necessary talk the shop-keeper down.

Now we are from the middle class. This

means we cannot afford to go shopping in
air-conditioned malls or other exotic locales;
although I do remember going to one mall
some time ago to have the experience. The
place was full of young people with no place
to go and the shops were empty. After a
while I just wanted out of there. Coming
back to my story, we go to one of the largest
middle class shopping centers in town called
the Sarojini Market. From a sleepy market it

118
has now become one of the most crowded
and vibrant but in its favor one has to say
that everything we are looking for we find
them there and also many things that irritate
us.

Saturdays and Sundays are the only days we

have free time. Unfortunately the whole
town suffers from the same symptom. The
shops are fine, even the crowd can be
tolerated. What makes the experience
tiresome is the walking area is full of well
entrenched hawkers taking up the whole
place and the shopkeepers displaying their
wares outside the showrooms, taking up the
walking area. Then the itinerant sellers with
their wares on their shoulders keep coming
on, they stand right in your path and ask you
to buy their hankies, belts or tablecloths -
the list is long. I feel like giving them one. To
add to the melee are the beggars.

Dirt from spitting, garbage and the attitude

that every corner is a dustbin if not a toilet
forms part of the larger picture.

So the poor visitors who make the market

hum are left struggling with 4 feet of space
to wander in. It is shoulder to shoulder
experience and the fear that your pocket will
be picked. I go there because I have to but

119
after precisely an hour or so, I absolutely
demand a glass of cold coffee. This revives
me for about twenty minutes. Then when the
going becomes unbearable, we enter any of
the showrooms that have created a haven by
glass and air-conditioning. We pose at
looking at their wares and obviously find
nothing of interest. Revived then we go on
again.

And I wonder why I am getting so tired in this

surrounding. Is it the carbon dioxide in the
air or just my sensitivity or something else?
Of course the attitude of the people we end
up interacting with is very “do-your-thing-
quickly-and-go”; polite but couldn’t care
less.

Then I chanced to read a passage in the TOI.

The writer says: “Stress is physically
infectious. People under stress radiate stress
energy to the surroundings through their
chakras and auras. Consciously or
subconsciously they transfer a great bulk of
stress by being nasty and rude to others”. I
find this explanation perfectly explaining the
fatigue I feel. The relief I get on getting out
of the market is palpable; as if coming out of
a sauna.

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The auras of others are not the only thing I
would say. When you are used to cleaner
environment and have spent a lot of time in
beautifying your space, and you wish to live
a “beautiful” life, you are annoyed and it
shows when you have to tolerate the mess
and dirt created by others – specially in
public places. I have always used the
condition of the toilet area as an indicator of
the mentality of the owners and a very fine
pointer to the environment and attitudes I
will meet there. I have rarely been wrong.

I have often wondered why as a people we

are so callous about the cleanliness of public
spaces. Just go to the posh M-Block market
of Greater Kailash 1 market; one of the
poshest colonies or at least with a very rich
class of residents. People from all over come
here. Pay a little attention to the state of
affairs right at the entry of the market where
they park their stylish cars worth a few
fortunes. (SEE PICTURE ON COVER JACKET).
But nobody complains so there is a tacit
acceptance. When shall we insist on getting
the best? Because as Somerset Maugham
says: Those who insist on the best normally
get it!

It has to be a collective effort.

121
THE TRAFFIC POLICE AND WE.

Everyone blames and criticizes the traffic

and the traffic police. Where does the truth
lie? Are the traffic police and the MCD alone
to blame for the conditions? Aren’t we to
blame also for the chaos we create on the
roads and in our surroundings? Everyone has
noticed that on the day the auto rickshaws
and taxis go on strike, the traffic moves
smoothly; why does this happen? Let’s study
some of the major consideration where we
are at fault.
1) The essential minimum rules of
the road. Ask ten people at
random the rules of the road. The
chances are that most of them
would have no clue. Very many
are not even aware that there are
rules and there is an etiquette
code. Take a simple question like:
At a crossing, when two cars are
coming from opposite sides, who
has the right of way? The older
generation that was educated in
the 40s and 50s still has some
inkling but the latest generation
has none. Earlier, having a
vehicle, even a scooter was a
dream. Only the well placed or

122
 well heeled could think of cars
and these people were properly
educated and small in numbers.
Gradually, with every generation,
the younger people began
acquiring vehicles and licenses
with ease and came on the roads
without being properly trained.
Nobody cared about this aspect.
Even a minimum knowledge of
the basic thumb rules would make
things easier for everybody, if
only we agreed to put them into
practice.

2) The role of the police and their

limitations. The importance of self-
control. We, in India tend to blame
others and never pay attention to our
own faults. This shows in our attitude
when we blame the traffic police for
everything. The police are there to
assist us and not to keep a check on our
bad manners. When we break a law we
are doing an injustice to our fellow
travelers. Rules and laws of the road
have been made after long years of
research all over the world. These are
for our safety. The fault is squarely
ours. The police are not there to hold
and control our driving. This would

123
 mean that every driver would need a
policeman in his vehicle and this logic
even as a thought is ridiculous.
Everyone on the road has rights. None
of us is so special that we have any
special right of way. We should be
patient and move along with the flow.
Under no circumstances do we have the
right to endanger and create chaos in
the moving traffic because we are
puffed up by our self-importance.
3) Linear traffic movement. The
advantages. The need to follow each
other like a train for faster and safer
driving. Have you noticed how trains
move? In a line. Every bogey following
the other at the same speed on a
simple line. Hundreds of trains move on
the same lines one after the other and
there is no problem. This is applied
physics. If you want to have smooth
flowing traffic and reach home or
office in time, this logic has to be
followed. There is no other way and by
attempting to be clever by beating the
other drivers, we are not helping at all.
The roads are not racetracks. Not to
forget all the curses we are collecting
from the other drivers whom we are
disturbing and scaring into dangerous
case of nerves.

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4) At Turnings. The geometry and
physics of vehicular movement at
turnings/curves. Correct behavior at
traffic islands. The necessity to give
way to traffic to your right. This is
simple geometry. When turning, two
vehicles will come in each other’s way
if they break the rule of linear
movement. Overtaking is simply bad
understanding of each other’s
movement and you will cross the
other’s path, which would create a
dangerous situation. I have never been
able to understand how even after
years of being on the road; these
simple equations fail to get impressed
on the minds of our people.
5) Slow vehicles versus fast vehicles.
The need to understand and follow
average traffic speeds on different
stretches of roads. If you look into the
speed of traffic, you will realize that
certain stretches of roads have very
individualistic characters. In some
areas the speed of traffic is slow and in
other areas, fast. A good driver gauges
and follows the average speed of that
particular stretch. This is advantageous
to all. Here, we have to admit that all
the different makes of vehicles which

125
 have different max speeds are a
nuisance. But we add to the brew by
trying to go faster than everybody else
and by hogging the opposite lanes we
make matters worse and block the path
totally.

6) Overtaking. Rules and good manners.

Avoiding potentially dangerous
situations. There are certain
established rules of overtaking. We
break them only to our disadvantage
and we put all on the road in peril of
accidents. In India we drive on the left
of the road and the steering wheel is on
the right of the car. This means that
the view of the driver on his left is
limited. So we are only putting our own
lives in jeopardy by overtaking from
the left side. In a jocular mood I call it
UNDERTAKING. But then the Indian’s
driving style is more clever than
intelligent. What are we trying to prove
and to whom?

7) The disaster zone created by

zigzagging and trying to cut into
traffic. The psychology of ‘Me First”.
The psyche of a people shows in their
driving habits. See how we want to be
the first to go ahead. It is the ME, MINE

126
 and MYSELF syndrome in action. How
childish!

8) The hazards of jaywalking. The lack

of Concern for one’s own safety. Fast
moving traffic has the right of way on
roads. I have never understood the
psychological phenomena behind the
total lack of concern for safety the
Indians show on the road. People see a
vehicle come and literally jump in front
of it. They cross roads at any point that
suits them, as long as it is the shortest
cut to their way home. Nobody ever
seems to realize the number of times
the drivers have to take evasive action
to saves these idiots on the roads.
Roads are made for the vehicles, and
the least you can do is to take care of
your own selves. This tendency, I think
is the result of how we bring up our
children. We never let them think for
themselves. Right into adulthood, both
the parents at home and the teachers
in school spoon feed the children and
do everything for them. The
subconscious minds forever remain at
the age of four at best. Chronologically
people age but at heart they are
children and show all the psychological
traits of kindergarten kids!

127
Upgrade or perish

As a consultant to industry, I have had the

pleasure to meet many leaders who reached
an enviable market position but then instead
of improving and building upon it, let the
company slide into oblivion. They often hit
upon a good product and their foray into the
market is successful. On the basis of this they
create a small empire of sorts. But then the
pioneering spirit gradually fades. The
company head becomes more interested in
spending the money he is making rather than
worry about the company; after all the
managers are supposed to do that. Only one
thing would be amiss here. The owner does
appoint managers but keeps all the authority
of decisions in his own hands. So for every
mishap, he has a scapegoat at hand and he is
quite happy with the situation.

It is quite akin to the old “zamindar”

mindset. Lord of the realm; the money raking
in without effort. The children being busy
enjoying themselves; the very property that
was feeding them going to the dogs due to
mismanagement and vested interests of the
managers who were creating small empires
of their own at the expense of their Lord.

128
I have seen small and big companies close
shop with a regularity that can only mean a
faulty mindset. It is only when the company
would start losing money that they would
start thinking of taking action. Mostly I found
that it was the second generation which was
at fault. Their fathers started something and
the enterprise flowered. The only mistake
the parents made was to leave the education
of their progeny to other agencies like
schools and colleges. The time they should
have given to train up the second generation
to slip into their shoes, they simply could not
afford. So it happens with a regularity that
the second generation inherits an empire for
which they were not adequately trained to
handle.

Management by the second generation is

limited to action taken for sure in jerks and
uncertain steps. It is more in the spirit of
experiment than knowing what to do. When
the fabric is old, patching up and darning
won’t do. Whatever the action taken, it
always is a case of too little too late when
the company was beginning to take its last
gasps and by then it would be too late.

India is full of such brands and their

promoting companies that were household

129
names in the 50-70s but today have
disappeared. I had the fortune to be
connected with quite some of them. Every
time I would speak to them of the necessity
to upgrade and improve upon their product
line or diversify or take advantage of their
market position with new approaches, I
would get a singularly similar response. At
best they would agree to some cosmetic
changes but no more. In at least five cases I
even found them new products and all they
had to do was launch them but none of the
companies had the courage or vision to do
so. Of course I was dealing with the CEOs;
otherwise read “owner”.

In short this boiled down to their

understanding of their product which was
selling fine, their times which were glorious
with all and sundry bowing to them and the
fact they thought their position was
unassailable and would simply continue on
into eternity. They were making money and
their product line was in demand and there
was no competition in sight. They had
arrived and the forward movement of the
industrial world would now stop there while
they raced on.

It all depends on the individual and most do

precisely what they should not. The moment

130
they feel that they have arrived, they
become complacent. They see them-selves
only in neon lights. They refuse to worry
about such things as self-improvement and
upgrades. It never occurs to them in their
arrogant befuddled state that products,
technology and markets change. And so do
people. They can only see themselves moving
forward and none to beat them. After all,
time and time again have they not proven
themselves as top-class and top of the class?
It is so surprising to see this smug lot, not
willing to acknowledge that a new crop of
more-with the-times people are joining the
world every year.

Luckily too, life is not very long. 3 score and

ten years pass in a jiffy. The sad part is that
we never realize this part of life and never
learn to be grateful. We live with arrogance
and die preoccupied with what will happen
to our goods and chattel built over with so
much pain and anxiety.

131
The Trap of Virtue.

Who decides what is virtuous and what is

sinful? How do we decide what is right and
what is wrong? On what grounds do we lay
the rules of behavior and government? I know
I am laying myself open to debate and
ridicule but I am appalled at the trap people
have laid down for themselves in the name of
virtue.

The government supplies electricity free to

farmers in the guise of being helpful and
promoting agriculture. Totally forgetting that
there is not enough electricity produced in
India and who will foot the bill. But it is a
good ploy. It makes them “seem” doing
good, feel good and garner votes. Then they
raise the taxes and virtually force the rest of
the population to cheat to make end meet.
The industries on the other hand are
deprived of power and then have to produce
their own power and the prices of goods and
services go up. You can’t clap with one hand.
The entire nation goes into cheating mode.
Corrupt practices become the norm. I ask:
have they helped the nation really?

The mother knows only one thing. Her

darling is the best and only the best will do

132
for him. As long her darling is happy, the
best that can be done has been done. So she
agrees to all his demands, never bothering to
teach him anything resembling discipline and
self control or the polite ways of the world.
For most the method to demonstrate one’s
love is by feeding them and over feeding
them. Today we have a crop of young people
who are rude and violent and suffering from
obesity which has gained the notoriety of
being the highest killing disease. Guns come
out of the closet at little or no provocation.
Lovers throw acid on their beloved because
their love is so deep that their amour-propre
cannot tolerate a “NO”.

Fathers can rape their daughters and get

away with it. Couples are hacked to death
because they dared to marry against the
wishes of the community and the whole
village considers this a virtuous act. For a
few pennies more the wife who was wedded
and brought home with such pomp and
glamour is burned deliberately by the in-laws
and this is not found gruesome enough to
create enough of a howl. But an actress has
the courage to come and speak about a truth
that is commonly in practice and half the
nation rises to act against it; as long
everything is behind the curtain and we can
all virtuously continue to remain the decent

133
human beings that we seem to be. Out of
sight is good enough.

We give birth to children because it is the

gift of God without a thought to where we
shall provide for the child that we are
bringing forth into this reasonable, happy
and beautiful world. Every birth is feted and
congratulated. A great and happy deed has
been done totally hiding the fact that the
child was never the aim and is often not even
desired. But if our sexual propensities can be
satisfied only by accepting this, then of
course we put up a sham happy face on the
birth of every child. Children have been
coming into the world since ages and the
consequences are known to all but virtue is
in having children and not in learning from
history. We conveniently ignore the
unfortunate young people, who are sick from
malnutrition and have to sell their bodies to
make their ends meet. But we do not refrain
from vociferously condemning prostitution.
We even go to the limit of hating these
hapless young women as depraved and unfit
for being seen in the company of the virtuous
who are responsible for keeping the trade
going.

All these young men who grow up by some

stroke of luck of destiny but with nothing

134
except two arms and two legs to call their
own, what do they have to look forward to;
no education, no training of any sort but
hunger alone? They were meeting their bare
needs and providing a well needed service by
pulling rickshaws in Kolkata and elsewhere.
Then the wise babus in the government,
secure in their permanent guaranteed jobs,
who have never know hunger, somehow saw
the light. They decreed that pulling
rickshaws is below the virtuous dignity of
human beings and banned them. Now these
proud dignified men and their famished
families (yes; they have good and proper
families) are part of a virtuous humanity but
starving.

So finally what is virtue if not a trap, a good

excuse to look the other way and not take
the steps to correct anomalies that we come
across in our lives but dutifully ignore in our
virtuous envelopes? Leave alone the world;
we are not prepared to take the first step to
better our own personal lives!

135
Wake up to it; now!

We as a people pride in breaking laws. The

guy who can break a law and get away with
it considers himself "greater". The roots
being in some reason like political nexus,
cash power, friendship with those
maintaining law and order, and such. These
people are convenient to have as friends so
we massage their egos no end; forgetting
conveniently that the demon of greed serves
us only against a hefty payment from our
soul’s treasury and some destruction around
us.

We use friendship and family to further our

own ends to the detriment of others. Our
entire arrogant make-up is based on this.
Wishing and worrying about making it go
away is not going to take us anywhere.
Anyway the malaise has reached a point
where anyone who opens his mouth gets
literally bashed up.
I blame our forefathers for not stopping it
when they should have. When the first cases
of corruption in administration came up right
after independence, the entire political top
brass's attitude was that all these leaders
have suffered so much under the English yoke

136
and that they should be allowed some
leeway!.

Now this permissiveness and turning of the

eye has percolated to the lowest of the low
and newer laws are giving powers to those
who have no self-discipline and understand
only one thing - fill up your pockets as fast as
you can - who knows when the sun will stop
shining.

AND on this I am emphatic - study the story

lines of our movies since the very begining of
our independent status. They all encourage,
anger, arrogance, cheating, molestation and
all. They glorify these traits in 3D. Three
generations have been brought up on this.
Now if you see the serials on
TV..............awful. Arrogance seems to be
the story epicenter and vengefulness the only
trait on the basis of which the storylines
move. Humor is still at the village bumpkin
stage. The intelligence of the people making
these movies and story-lines can be gauged
by the fact that in the 40s and 50s it was
fashionable to show the comic with a
Hitlerian mustache. This has now become a
fixed feature. You are supposed to know that
the guy with the Hitler bush is there to give
you a comic break. There is always a cabaret
type scene and the drink of choice is always

137
VAT 69. Successful people with money to
burn always have a woman on their arms and
drinks to relax. Rape has been made into a
sport. The people have been lapping them up
and I can actually show you this behavior in
action in those who watch these programs.

Humans today have organized themselves to

commercially benefit each other from
titillating the baser instincts of man. They
have thereby created a self perpetuating
cycle of misery and now of course this is
reaching proportions that threaten our own
lives. Our first line of defense is by
complaining where we clearly prove our
sense of being virtuous but really do nothing
about it. It is only when things go out of
control and hurt comes home where it counts
that we take up cudgels. But then it is a case
of too little too late.

So where shall we start? I am not able to

influence even my wife. I dare not say a
word to the neighbors because I have to live
here. On the roads I would dare to speak up
only if I had two lathi-bearing body guards
with me. If I try to discuss these points,
people laugh at me and justify these TV
serials on the basis that they all know it is
only "theatre". Now my baby is lapping it up
too and I am appalled but there is no way for

138
love or money that I am able to stop the
women in my household. When I did try to
force my own viewing standards by sticking
to selected programs on Hallmark, my
mother to whom the TV belonged as I did not
have one, quarreled with such force that
peace came into the home only when I put
“her” TV in “her” room and bought a new
one for my wife. Now they both watch the
same programs at the same time on their
respective TVs and in their rooms and hate
each other with a vengeance. Things are
taking their course - I watch the TV
sometimes in the day and the wife takes over
in the evening. I sleep at 9 so this suits her
fine. She keeps herself awake forcefully to
watch the serials and the child is getting into
the habit too. This has directly affected the
health too as she tends to sleep late, have
constipation and the rush to reach her office
in time upsets her and everybody, including
her eating cycle. Later in the day, you can
see their behavior patterns are quite strongly
affected by what they have been watching
the last evening.

I have stopped trying with the hope and

prayer on my lips that the good Lord knows
what he is doing. I am wondering if I shall be
able to change the course of things for my
child by putting her in a different

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atmosphere or something when she is ready
to move out of the umbrella of her mother.
Then I also think of her own destiny. I
wonder what and where it is all leading to.

It is saddening, but I think in the long run,

when the malaise will start hurting even the
perpetrators themselves and everyone will
object and fight back, then a sort of self
regulation will come in and the improvement
will sink in as a necessity.

Till then we can go to the courts and form

vigilance communities. But remember, when
you invite the ire of the goonda element,
don’t forget to take the required protection
measures too for yourself. You will be laying
yourself open to forces that you may not
really understand fully and misjudge them
totally in their vehemence.

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GRANDER THAN THOU

0 to 60 in 6 seconds or something to that

effect; so impressive and so useless. Yet this
info is on top of the list of car manufacturers
when they advertise their car. There must be
something in this because even the buyers
look for this info. Of what earthly use is it in
the usual daily driving that we do and the
grid-lock traffic of the city; this has been one
of my enigmas. In the same vein I am foxed
also by the advertising by certain ply-board
manufacturers that their ply-boards are
boiling water proof. Boiling water proof!
Show me one person and one application
where this info has been of use!!

Let us though not be misled into thinking

that nobody is swayed by these clinically
correct but otherwise useless claims. The car
buyers think that it indicates a powerful
engine without ever thinking of how the car
will cruise and will it be able to overtake
easily when fully loaded with the whole
family? In case of the ply-board, the
advertising has worked because even my
carpenter is totally convinced that this is the
best ply-board and recommends it as a
water-proof product, totally missing out on
the “boiling” part.

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A new sales pitch has come with pollution.
Water filters using the reverse osmosis
process. These promise the purest of water
and at a higher price; to the extent that it
may even be de-mineralized and devoid of all
natural nutrients. People are going for the
word “pure” and are impressed by the over-
priced better product without once thinking
of the notion- “Do we really want such a de-
mineralized and lifeless water?” At the other
end they buy expensive artificially
mineralized water in bottles- the incongruity
between the two never sticking anyone.

I can give many examples of such

presentations that impress the layman but
are actually of no use; which leads me to the
very purpose of this write-up: humans love
and live in a make-believe world.

Today the very basis of our pride is mass-

produced products. The criteria of being
“Grander” than our neighbor is to own a
product that is more expensive and having
features that the neighbor’s product does not
have. We then strut around like peacocks,
fully assured of our superiority vis-à-vis
others, totally forgetting that thousands of
others have the same product and worse, can
buy one anytime they want one. How easily

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we are lulled into believing what we want to
and then convince ourselves that the world is
looking at us and we are the centre of
attention.

There is really no doubt in our minds that we

are making quite a dash. Yet, in case
something maybe amiss, we do not forget to
slyly look around to make sure that others
are looking at us or not, of course with the
nose held high. Who will tell these poor
misguided peasants that people are looking
at you only to make sure that you are looking
at them?

Recently we had the pleasure of a new

neighbor moving into the next apartment
which had been lying vacant. It also being
the most expensive of the apartments in the
building; the new landlady made a grand
entrance. From day one she brought in a
team of workers that were hammering away
all day and late into the night. Three times a
day she would come around and explain to us
all the problems she was having. Then she
decided things were all wrong in the building
and started making changes in the plumbing
so that she could have water 24 hours on 24
regardless of the others in the building. The
truth was the water supply was faulty due to
certain defects in the main pipeline and

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neither was the water supply adequate. This
meant that the others would not have
enough water or even none at all. Her point
of view was clear although she did not say it
in so many words, that as the owner of the
most expensive apartment in the building,
she should be enjoying a rather grander
position. She never forgot to mention her
business details and their turnover, never
missing out on the amount she had paid for
the apartment. Her description of her
migraines was ludicrously explicit.
Unfortunately nobody was impressed. Her
changes were objected to and a neighborly
fight ensued. The police was called in. Even
with the police around, she made no bones
about the fact that she thought she had
special rights and that she would show to all
those around her who were making her life
miserable, who was the real mistress around
here. Finally she had to pipe down and the
changes were reversed. Everybody went back
to their lives being lonely together. The sad
part is that she is quite a nice person but she
keeps her nose high and refuses to
understand that others have their egos and
intelligence to prove.

If a simple apartment can do this to her, I am

afraid to imagine what a Rolls-Royce and a
Palace would do to her. Worse is the fact

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that we all are tainted by this bug of basking
in reflected glory of goods and relationships.
It does not take much to give us a swollen
head. There are always lesser endowed
people than us and when we compare
ourselves, we mostly do so with the ones who
have less than us.

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CAN WE REALLY HELP?

I just made a discovery. At least I have

not read or heard anyone talk about this
angle on this subject. It pertains to the
“help” we wish to give to our more
unfortunate friends which forms the basis
of charity all over the world. I am not into
charity but I teach and support youngsters
to get going in whatever capacity
possible. My discovery is that although
they are keen and willing, none have
really gone far enough to surpass
themselves. Then it hit me and I realized
that the problem lies in the fact that
these young people do not have a fully
functioning memory.

I observed the carpenter at work, the

students who are learning English from me
and my maid. Then I looked around and
saw that most people have this problem.
For instance the carpenter; it would be so
easy to explain to him the plans and tell
him what is wanted and then let him do
it. He will nod his head to everything and
you get the feeling that everything is
clear and now you can focus on other
things. In reality it does not work out so.
Leave it to him and within half hour you

146
can see him executing the job in a totally
different fashion. What happened?

Take the instance of the students; they

wish to improve their language ability as
they see their prospects in life slipping
away due to poor communications. The
students I am talking of are all above 30
years of age and professionally well
established above the average. They have
picked up a packet of faults since their
school days. Every time a fault is pointed
out, corrected and explained it remains in
their memory and for two days they
remember it and everything is fine. Then
by the fourth day when you are onto the
next lesson the mistake pops up again. We
are back to square one. Day in and day
out this continues. Practice makes perfect
they say. The same error is corrected for
two months but it still keeps popping up.
What is happening?

My maid of 10 years who knows how and

what is needed to be done in our house
goes about doing her work and there is no
problem. But tell her to do something out
of the routine and she will say yes and
then never do it. If you ask her why, she
will say that she forgot; the intentions are

147
fine but it is never done. What could be
the reason?

Then I was called for a short period to try

and teach language in a school that was
having students from the lower income
group. There I soon noticed that by the
time I came to lesson “four”, the students
had forgotten every letter of the lesson
“one”. They could not advance further.
This is when I saw the connection
between all these instances.

What I conclude is that due to the lack of

stimulation, what I call mental exercise,
they had not learnt to use their memories
to back up their actions and thought.
They are not advancing in any field
because they are not learning; neither
from their education nor from their
experience. They never retain anything
they learn. They live by habit and bumble
along. They know quite a lot but the
learning stopped somewhere at the age of
16.

My carpenter needs that we sit by him

when the work is in progress and keep a
strict eye on the job. A moment away
from him and he will cut the wood
without ever cross-checking the plans for

148
measurements, totally confident of
himself and his memory. This has
happened more than once and once he
cut a long, specially bought beam by half
because he needed some wood. It never
occurred to him to ask what the beam
was doing there. This is more by habit
then ill will.

The students, and I have enough to base

my study on, are from backgrounds that
are definitely privileged as against the
ones of my maid and carpenter. They
have had proper schooling and even
college education. I take the instance of
two of the students. One is a senior
executive in an insurance firm. Today he
is near retirement and he is eager to be
promoted which should give him a better
salary and more importantly a better
retirement package. I would say this
would be motivation enough. But the
needs of the day are strong. The insistent
ring of the cell phone which he refuses to
shut off even in class has more attractions
than a distant retirement package. The
demands of his clients cannot be denied.
So although, as you and I would see it, his
need and motivation is strong, he
manages to come to only half the number
of classes. He has no time to practice or

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even listen again to the lectures which
are recorded for him on tape. By the time
he comes for the next class after a gap of
10 days, he has already totally forgotten
everything from the previous class.

Another student is from the travel

industry. He organizes the inbound tours
for his company but remains a back-room
boy because he is unable to communicate
in any other language but Hindi and the
requirement for dealing with clients from
abroad needs English. He tried for two
months and worked real hard but no
progress was recorded. He thinks in Hindi
and his English is a transliterated version
of his mother tongue. He really does not
need English to survive.

Between his family’s pressures and his

job’s, neither of the students has any
energy left for “learning”. Their
memories remain in the background and
the character is not strong enough to
break the mould. A strong wish is there
but the impetus that only a strong
motivation can give does not exist. It was
never instilled in the formative years and
now it is too late.

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The maid cannot be left to finish off any
job on her own. You ask her do it and get
it done there and then. 5 minutes is about
the maximum her memory can retain
anything. Even if she remembers to do the
job, she will have forgotten the
instructions. The other day I got a new
trouser that is drip-dry. So I explained this
to her that if she hung it properly, I will
not need to iron it. I showed her how and
for the next two times she did exactly as
taught. Then for some days I did not wear
the trouser. After a three week’s gap
when the turn of the trouser came to be
washed, she had forgotten it all. It was
mussed up so badly that I had to put in
special effort to iron out the kinks. When
I brought this to her notice, she smiled
sweetly and said sorry! Well, to be
matter-of-fact about things, considering
that she has been washing dishes and
clothes since she was twelve and now she
is 34 and she has nothing else to look
forward to for the next 34 years, what
interest does she have to learn about
things that only increase her work?

The other day my computer software guy

came to remove a virus that necessitated
formatting and reloading of the software.
I was there yet when putting in my

151
identity he put in the first name that
came to his head. When I saw what he
had done, I remonstrated that he could
have simply asked me but unrepentantly
he replied that it never occurred to him
that he could be wrong. The funny thing
about it all is that he was so simply
honest about it that there was nothing
more to be said. I had to laugh it off.

All these people I am basing my stories on

are extremely nice people. They are now
part of my family fabric but no amount of
coaxing or lecturing makes them see any
further ahead. Cross a certain limit and
their vanity rears its head. They have
accepted their destiny. Change means
effort and that can mean a lot of effort
and loss of time for questionable results.
So beside a bad or non-operative memory,
there is also an element of native
shrewdness; they also know that when all
is said and done, we need them to get the
job done and we shall not quarrel or
argue. They are well aware of the fact
that we cannot be going about getting
new people and workers into our lives
everyday. So I suppose, they are really
being pragmatic. Deep down they know
their worth and their limitations.

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What can we do? Nothing! They are what
they are. A product of an upbringing and
environment over which we have no
control and the past cannot be changed.
Then there is their Destiny and Karma if
you believe in it. So I revert back to my
question; can we really help? Yes; if you
consider tolerating and promoting them as
“help”. But if we think that we can help
them to rise above their limitations and
make for a better more economically
fruitful life, I am not so sure.

153
CORPORATE LAWYERS AND WHAT THEY
DO

The other day I had the refreshing

opportunity to meet a young man
aspiring to be a corporate lawyer.
As a career how true does it hold for
the Indian condition?

Till recently, from what I can see, the

Indian corporations had not been allowed
to go international and therefore remained
small or fairly large entities with a
controlling structure firmly in the hands of
a patriarch or a small bunch of a family.
The whims and fancies of the chief resulted
in the decisions that the corporation then
followed. The mind set was feudal and the
management even more so. Nothing was
straightforward. What the corporation
purported to be doing and what it actually
did to make a killing were two entirely
different things. The Chartered accountant
who knew what was going on would paint
the correct picture for public consumption.
The balance sheet would show red or black
as the chief decided the need of the
moment demanded and that was that. A
public company was even more rampantly

154
badly managed as the share holders were
the final losers.

All companies were playing on the

governments controls. The interest rates
were high and monopolies were more the
rule than the exception. The profit margins
were high and clean business unheard of. In
this scenario I would have failed to see a
corporate lawyer making any headway. The
companies would invest half their money in
manufacturing or trading as shown on
paper. The other half would be invested in
other companies doing well for some
reason or the other or in land. Fixed
deposits would fetch up to 18% per annum.
A profit that is difficult to achieve even by
well managed companies today. Supplier’s
payments would be delayed as long as
possible so that interest could be earned on
the amount and that would help the
company keep financially afloat. All rules
and laws were observed in the breaking
more or less; the fear of the law taking
speedily its course hardly being a
deterrent.

The legal system of India with its tortoise

speed actually encourages breaking of
economic laws. Businesses actually want to
go to court. Keeping arguments sub-judice

155
is in their interest. This way they can
continue holding on to funds that does not
belong to them or supply substandard
products and services at favorable margins.
When the time comes of a settlement it is
done out of court. By then, in the
interweaving years which may be anything
from 10 to 20 years, the company has
doubled or tripled its capital base by
earning interest on the blocked capital. It
even tempts the corporations to edge over
to take criminal risks.

The activities are rarely illegal per se but

highly unethical nevertheless. The
corporate lawyer as I can see in the present
context can only be a paid executive of the
company doing nearly the same as any
lawyer working independently. The only
difference being that he becomes a
specialist for that corporation’s activities.
Still the question remains if he will ever get
a chance to become an advisor and policy
maker because that is where the actual fun
is. Often the owners of the company play
on the vanities of younger people to win
their trust and promote them to director
levels; they become unknowingly fronts for
the owner and worse, get caught in the
criminal net!

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The opening of the economy has brought a
different culture. A culture of a
corporation working by certain principles
laid down by the board is not exactly new
to India but now is becoming quite
accepted. All the international MNCs that
have opened shop are bringing a whiff of
some unknown managing customs. Good for
us! In this change of managing methods,
there is of course a place for the corporate
lawyer. But gain I ask a question. In India
where the legal system remains out of tune
to the exigencies of the time, how much
can a corporate lawyer really do? And if he
will not be allowed to do much, is there a
career in it? A corporate lawyer is at best a
management expert with knowledge of the
law for the time being and for some time it
will remain so.

The answer is elsewhere. It is in the Law

firms which are fast becoming a force
worth emulation and aping. They act as
consultants to corporations and also take
their cases to court. The corporation’s
prefer to pay them a consultancy and get
expert advice and support rather then
depend on untried employees with no
chance to broaden their scope of
experience in a small enclosed

157
environment. The corporate lawyer is really
coming into his own in these law firms.

While we are on the subject, why not think

International? With international trade
growing and corporations from other
countries active here and vice versa, here
is fodder for the next generation as long as
they are not influenced mainly by the
vision of a high profile life as seen in the
movies and TV serials coming to us from
the western countries where the jet-set
corporate lawyer is a power to reckon with.
He not only knows the law but also assists
the corporations to walk the fine fence of
“just legal”. He carries a lot of prestige
and even political clout as he holds a place
nobody else can boast of in the hierarchy of
the corporation. He is the only one who
understands and often the only one privy to
the complete picture. Of course the
position then gives him huge corporate
benefits such as limos and secretaries with
his own jet and what not.

If only life could be restricted to such

glamorous visions!

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