Love Systems Insider

Date: November 2009

Getting Started - Fashion & Style

We want to talk about some basic fashion and style tips that will make everything you do more
successful. We'll also get into lifestyle a little bit. In the past, we've been reluctant to be too
detailed about this stuff. Fashion and style is one way of conveying your identity, and one of our
best weapons is our ability at bootcamps to help you identify and express an identity that both
fits you well and is interesting to beautiful women. However, that being said, we can definitely
tell you what NOT to do, and that's a start. So, in no particular order...

1. Untuck that shirt - Don't go out to a social gathering with a collared, button-down shirt
that is tucked in. It's not in style. Trust us.

2. Burn that t-shirt - Don't wear a white t-shirt under your dress shirt. That's very 1980s. It
conveys a lack of sexuality. Undo the top two buttons of your shirt (no more!) and show
a tiny bit of your chest. If this exposes mounds of chest hair, then get that taken care of
too. While you're at it, get rid of short-sleeved button-down shirts too.

3. Get some ornamental stuff - Earrings, funky shoes, rings, hats, scarves, neck-chains,
wrist bands, whatever. Get something. What is purely ornamental (e.g., a double breasted
suit, cuff links, a peacock's tail) is sexy. What is purely functional generally is not. See
how Love Systems Instructors, movie stars, rock stars, and other men (whom women
find sexy) dress, and you'll get it.

4. Make your clothes fit - Why spend $80 on a great shirt that doesn't fit if you won't
spend $5-$10 to have it altered? If it doesn't fit you perfectly, spend a couple of bucks,
take it to a dry cleaner/alterations place, and get them to make it flatter your body.

5. Remove excess hair - If you have any hint of your eyebrows touching, wax or shave
them so there is separation. Nose and ear hairs are sexy to no one. Make sure your
sideburns, if you have them, have a neat line and definition and are at the same length on
each side. Most women prefer shaved chests too, though this varies.
 6. Squelch acne - First, if you're still getting acne, see a dermatologist. Second, for your
acne scars, consider laser skin care (expensive) or makeup (cheap). Get a female friend
to help you buy a cover up stick and some powder. You can make your zits vanish for
the night.

7. Whiten your teeth - It's cheap and easy. Go through your dentist, not those white strips.
No excuses.

8. Work out - No excuses. Just do it.

9. Glasses - Glasses are sexy on some men. They are not on most men. Ask men in the
game whether you look better with them on or off. If it's off, try contacts or surgery.

10. Relax - Have you done all of this? Great. Now when you're out meeting women, don't
worry about this anymore. You've done the best you can with what you have. Girls
WILL notice. If you rated your looks from 1-10, a 6 who takes care of himself (and looks
like an 8 because of it) is infinitely more attractive to a woman than an 8 who is a slob
(and stays an 8).

We go over this stuff in intense detail at the bootcamps, but most of it is pretty individualized - it
has to work for YOU. So use the above as a guide, but there is no substitute for getting advice
from men who are in the game and have a great skill set. Don't go to your other frustrated friends
for advice - they don't know what they are doing either. Don't rely too much on women's advice
- they will try to dress you up like a Ken doll and women generally don't really know what
attracts them anyway. Find the best guy you know, and ask him.

Another thing that will dramatically improve your success with women is your lifestyle. No
matter how smoothly you make your way through the Triad model, you will eventually not be
interesting to most women unless you have a desirable lifestyle.

• Cultivate interesting friends, especially those who have nothing to do with the seduction
community.

• Have a couple of hobbies. It's great if those hobbies give you a chance to meet women or
are exciting to women, but it's not necessary. Find something you are passionate about,
and pursue it.
 • Have female friends. Attractive female friends are best. Try saying "let's just be friends"
to a random number of the next few women you pick up. And then surround yourself
with them. You'll continue to develop social skills and you'll be far more attractive to
other women.

• Take yourself outside your comfort zone in your daily life. Travel, go skydiving, learn
another language, take up origami, it doesn't matter. Just do a couple of things that scare
you a bit or take yourself away from what's safe and easy. It's great for your identity and
will rub off on other aspects of your personality as well.

• The average lifespan for a human is about 28,000 days. Most likely, one third to one half
of those are already done for you. And in the last few, you won't be meeting many
women. Decide what is important to you, and pursue it. You're not going to get a second
chance. If your job is preventing you from having the lifestyle you want, change it. If
you're spending time surfing the net instead of improving your life, change your habits. If
your friends are holding you back, don't let them. If you keep doing what you've always
done, you will get what you've always gotten.

Becoming very successful with women isn't an incremental process. You can't keep everything
else in your life the same as it always was and expect your success with women to skyrocket
once you integrate a couple of tips from us. You'll get some results, sure, but you won't get the
transformation most people want. If you're not practicing, then practice. If you're not healthy,
then work out. If you're not interesting, then improve yourself. All we can do is tell you how, but
the execution depends on you. Invest in yourself.

ADVANCED SECTION

No surprises here. The advanced section on a fashion and style issue HAS to be about building a
strong identity.

This relates to point #3 in the section above – "Get some ornamental stuff." But it goes beyond
that. A man who has a strong identity is a man who has deliberately outfitted himself with
clothes, and accessories, which draw attention because they stand out. Wear at least one
interesting item. They may be unfashionable. But they are unique and attention-getting. We call
this "peacocking."
The term is derived from the courting rituals of the peacock. The male peacock grows an
exceptionally long and colorful tail to attract a mate. The long and colorful tail is at best useless
and at worst a hindrance (it gets in the way and attracts predators). What a male peacock with a
great tail is communicating is "I am so good at surviving and protecting myself that I can afford
the disadvantage of this tail." Female peacocks are attracted to the underlying strength of this
kind of male peacock.

Similar patterns can be found in human behavior. The man driving a Ferrari communicates that
he has such great access to resources that he can afford to waste some of it. The man ordering
the $500 bottle of vodka at a club communicates the same thing. These displays of wealth are
part of many men's courting rituals, and, because of this, are often cliched and
counterproductive. Thus, while some women will be attracted to the man in the Ferrari, others
will wonder if he is "compensating" or prefer a man who has enough going for him that he
doesn't need to flaunt monetary wealth as a way of making a good impression on women.

Building a strong identity – the Love Systems way – is about social, not material, wealth. This is
fantastically attractive to women if executed correctly. It draws attention, it demonstrates self-
confidence and individuality, and it is DIFFERENT. An attractive woman in her mid-20s has
probably been hit on 5000 times before you came along. Well, most of those 5000 were wearing
jeans and a button down shirt. They were boring and blended in with each other. Very few were
wearing leather bracelets, ornamental necklaces or something to stand out.

Having a strong visual identity is not without risks. The key question in putting together an
outfit is "can you pull it off?"

Example 1: A man walks into a trendy restaurant. He is wearing a top hat, a silk vest, and shiny
white shoes. Everyone looks. "Who is this guy?" He walks confidently to the bar, greets the
bartender and engages in conversation with two attractive women. They respond and enjoy his
company. Twenty minutes later he is seen telling a story to a small group (men and women) who
are listening intently. People start to drift over to have their picture taken with him. Women start
asking their dates to introduce them to him. He is always visible, always present, and he owns
the social environment. He is probably able to start in qualification with any woman in the room,
since they will already be attracted to him. His dress combined with his social status make
people think he is a celebrity, or at least treat him as if he were one. If he can pull it off...

Example 2: A man walks into a trendy restaurant. He is wearing a top hat, a silk vest, and shiny
white shoes. Everyone looks. "Who is this guy?" He walks around the area a couple of times,
looking for groups to break into. Finally he engages a group of women but is blown out.
Everyone notices. People start to stare and point. Some weirdo who can't dress is trying to pick
up women and he looks ridiculous. After a few minutes, he no longer has a chance. Everyone
has seen women reject him. No other women will be interested. His dress, combined with his
lack of social status make people think he is a loser, or at least treat him as if he were one. He
can’t pull it off...

As you can see, having a strong identity has a multiplying effect. The guy in Example 1
probably has the skills to attract women without it. But his decisions in his visual attire will
enable him to have more choices, especially among the most attractive women. The guy in
Example 2 probably wasn't going anywhere anyway. But choice of clothing ensured it. So, if
you're doing well, a strong visual identity will make it a lot better, but if you're doing badly, it
will make you a lot worse.

Your identity has to be different, but not weird. Dress like a celebrity, not a fool. There are no
hard-and-fast rules here; it will require some fashion intuition and experience (or trial and error).
But try things, experiment, and have fun!

Resources:
• Magic Bullets
• Love Systems on YouTube
• The Attraction Forums - Fashion & Style
• Interview Series Volume 6 - Identity
• Interview Series Volume 25 - How To Be an Alpha Male
• Interview Series Volume 47 - Overcoming Physical Obstacles

http://www.lovesystems.com/newsletters/getting-started-fashion