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contents

1st Word

The rest of the stor y on

Jim Poage, plus the County
tears down a building so
it can buy the one next to it.

PHOTO CREDITS
Around & About
Citizen Staff

Appeals Cour t rules in

Canyon High murder trial.

STAFF / CONTACT
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Director of Distribution Chase Cochran
Art Director Kayla Wallace
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MIKE
REYNOLDS

Last week, we introduced you to

Jim Poage, the guy on 4-B who
had the gall to vote against the rest
of the Board when it came to shelling out
some big money. Unfortunately, it was against
big money for the new Community Recreation
Center, which beats the heck out of the usual
corporate welfare 4-B has become synonymous
with. In any case, it was a bold move for Poage
to publicly question the Boards due diligence,
and we liked the guy immediately - so much so
that we spent a few minutes researching him,
after which we decided that we didnt really care
for him after all.
It turns out Poage isnt the watchdog
we almost mistook him for. He has a long,
profitable history of converting public funds
into handouts for politically-connected
businesses, using the power of government
to pick winners and losers, usurping the
free markets forces. His most high-profile
gig locally was as CEO of StarTech, a nowdefunct, San Antonio-based foundation fully
supported by taxpayer dollars. CORRECTION:
According to StarTechs 2012 IRS Form 990,
they were only 99.881% publicly funded.
Thats three decimal points worth of accuracy.
How careless of us to say fully.
Now, we promised you the other
shoe on Poage would drop this week, but
before we drop it, weve got to recap a lil
something from the last couple years. For
the making of the relevance.

Tim Zipp
Well make this quick. You may remember
Tim Zipp as the Vice-President in Charge
of Medicare Compliance for The Scooter
Store. Or you might remember him as the
President of the 4-B Board. For years, he
was never mentioned as both in any article
or report put together by the Houston-owned
TXCITIZEN.COM

Herald-Zeitung or KGNB radio,

because hey, it wasnt relevant,
as werent the millions of
dollars given to The Scooter
Store by 4-B while Zipp was
either 4-Bs Treasurer or Vice
President. Note: The Stores
founders brother, Matt Harrison,
served on the Board prior to Zipp.
Zipp was even President of 4-B after his
department at The Scooter Store was found
guilty of fraud, the company was raided by
the FBI, and the Justice Department announced
an investigation into his bidness. He remained
4-B President as 4-B tried to get some of those
millions back from his company. We declared
that a conflict of interest because we have
eyes and brains and whatnot. Chamber of
Commerce President and 4-B uber-consultant
Michael Meek said it wasnt, because Zipp
never voted on Scooter Store issues. We
believe he also added So nyeeeeeah to
that assertion, but details are unclear.

Let Us Explain this One Last

Stupid Time
Ok, heres why Zipp not voting on Scooter
Store issues is all mirrors and such, and where
the Poage situation picks up momentum.
Lets say you have a pie, and its going to
be cut into different size slices and distributed
to various pie eaters. One of those eaters is
on the committee that decides how big the
slices will be and to whom each is given.
That eater doesnt vote on the size of their
own slice, but they vote on everyone elses,
knowing full well that the size of the other
slices directly impacts their own.
That eater will always vote to keep the other
slices small (Rec Center) in order to keep theirs
big. In game theory this is called something.
We dont know what. Not important. What is
important is that this is how 4-B works. Theres
a finite amount of pie to go around, and Poage
is going to protect his slice.
Continued on page 5.

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Due Process

P
RO

In

ruled that Judge Charles A. Stephens did not

err when he added the misdemeanor charge
of assault to the States charges of murder
and manslaughter. The judges decision was
to allow the jury to also consider a lesser
charge instead of the just the two felony

2013 death of Logan Davidson. The

causing the victim to hit his head against
the wall, leading to his death. The accused
and witnesses during the trial testified that
Logan had been harassing the accused.
Because he is a juvenile, the suspect is not
named in court records.
Bob

Pemberton ruled against the State, while

Justice David Puryear dissented.
to add the lesser charge in no way affected
prosecutors ability to argue that the jury
should convict the juvenile suspect on either
of the two felony charges.
In the present case, the alleged jury
charge error, if it is error, does not affect
the States power to choose what offense to
pursue or impede the States prosecution of
the charged offenses in any way, Bourland
wrote in the majority opinion. All of the
States alleged alternative murder theories, as
well as the States manslaughter theory, are
being presented to the jury for consideration
in the jury charge. The juvenile courts
instruction on the lesser-included offense
does not limit the States liability theories or
increase the States burden of proof on any
of the charged offenses.
4

to render such a decision.

Such attempt by the State puts
this Court in the untenable position of
conducting what amounts to a legalsufficiency

review

of

the

evidence

regarding causation without the benefit of

a conventional record of all the evidence
admitted at trial, Bourland wrote.
In fact, the Court saw two scenarios in
which the jury could conceivably, and legally,
reach the conclusion that the attack was an
assault and not murder or manslaughter,
depending upon the presented evidence.
Thus, in this case, if, based upon the
evidence, the jury could conclude that: (1)
punching someone in the face twice is not an
act that is inherently dangerous to human life,
i.e., it is not an act that objectively creates a

DRESS UP

.E
M
P
N
6
,

substantial risk of death and (2) as appellant

used his fists in this case, it does constitute a
deadly weapon, two elements of the greater
offense of felony murder would be negated
and the commission of an act clearly
dangerous to human life (negating murder)
and the use of a deadly weapon (negating the
underlying felony of aggravated assault with
a deadly weapon) leaving only the lesser

E
X
P

The Court ruled that Stephens decision

because the State doesnt have the evidence

L
H E F I L MOR E

suspect, a juvenile, punched Logan twice,

charges would put them at a disadvantage

YT

The case concerns the November,

consideration on the true merits of the various

JO

charges the State was seeking.

in the juveniles case. The justices said such

12

In a 2-1 decision, a three-judge panel

manslaughter are the only proper charges

FRIDAY, MA
Y

classmate, Logan Davidson.

and

chastised

CE .

School student on trial in the death of his

Bourland

Appeals

I EN

prosecutors in the case of a Canyon High

Cindy

ruling,

prosecutors for arguing that murder and

The Third Court of Appeals ruled against

Justices

the

ER

Update: Canyon High

Murder Case

M NIG
H
T

WITH NICK ROGERS

offense of assault, Bourland wrote. Under

those particular circumstances, including how
the murder offense was charged, the juvenile
courts decision to submit an instruction on
the lesser-included offense of assault would
not necessarily be erroneous.
Jury instruction and closing arguments
are scheduled to resume Monday, unless
the State decides to appeal to the Texas
Supreme Court.

Nick Rogers covers courts & crime for the TX Citizen.

AD SALES 830.358.2493

Membership has its Privileges

Continued from page 3.

Heres that Other Shoe

Poage is tight with the Alamo Colleges (its

local campus known as the Central Texas
Technology Center). In fact, hes listed on
their website as a member of their Board of
Directors, alongside Rusty Brockman, whos
also on 4-Bs payroll through the contract the
Board has with the Chamber of Commerce.
Lets have a look at how much money 4-B has
given to the Alamo Colleges over the years:
$2.8 million. And the City got voters to
approve a bond for another $4 million. Were
into these people for a tasty $6.8 million.
4-B arranges its handouts with the Alamo
Colleges in three-year terms, and this is the
final year of the current deal. Its renewal
time. All of a sudden, Poages objection to
the Rec Center deal doesnt seem so weird
anymore. Not at all. Business as usual in
Texas Most Corrupt City.
Maybe Poage will quit the Alamo Board.
Maybe he already has, despite what the
Board advertises. Doesnt really matter. Hes
on 4-B for one reason - to drive cash to the
Alamo Colleges. Hey, anybody know how
much it costs to attend the CTTC?

Heres How Much it Costs to

Attend the CTTC

If you live in San Antonio, you can attend

the New Braunfels Alamo College campus
(CTTC) for the Locals Only rate of $480
per six-hour semester.
If you actually live in New Braunfels,
where the campus is located, where your
local sales and property taxes, through
4-B and that bond, are used to support the
campus, youll pay the Out-of-Towner
penalty rate of $1,172 per six-hour semester.
Again - if you live 20 to 65 miles away,
anywhere in Bexar County, you pay the locals
rate of $480 per six-hour semester. If you live
out on Airport Road, 400 feet from the campus,
you pay the non-locals rate of $1,172 per sixhour semester. Nearly 60% more. But why
quibble? Youre saving on fuel expense.
4-B/City Hall could put any kinds of strings
they wanted on the millions of taxpayer dollars
they gave, and continue to give, to the Alamo
Colleges. Demanding that local residents pay
the same tuition as San Antonians was not on
that list. Keep that in mind the next time you
hear Michael Meek, or Rusty Brockman, or Jim
Poage, or anyone connected with 4-B tell you
how much they care about the community.
TXCITIZEN.COM

Heres an example of the juice Poage brings

to the table: On Monday night, both the
Recreation Center money and another up
to $320,000 for the Alamo Colleges went
before council. The Rec Center cash was put
up for discussion and public input. The Alamo
Colleges money was put on the consent agenda
to be slid through without a peep. Fortunately,
David Goad pulled it from the consent agenda
and had it put up for discussion. Unfortunately,
he just used it as an excuse to complain about
road conditions. Naturally, it passed without
any other discussion.
So make that 7.1 million. Dollars.

County Overpays for Building

The County just bought downtowns TCOR/
Legacy building for $1.1 million dollars. The
County already owned the building next door
to it, the Bock building, but they tore that one
down because it was old and would cost too
much to remodel. Were guessing the number
to remodel was waaay less than $1.1 million
plus the cost of a tear-down, but hey, who
are we? We dont know WTF were talking
about. Ask Michael Meek.
Anyway, thats a $1.1 million dollar
building coming off the County tax rolls. So
factor that money in too.
Wait a minute. According this thing right
here, the County Assessors Website, that
building isnt worth $1.1 Million. Its valued
at $442,830. So we havent been collecting
taxes on a $1.1 million property, weve been
collecting on a property worth less than onehalf of that. Of course, market values are
always greater than assessed values, mostly.
But that gap between $442,830 and $1.1
million is considerable. The County just
paid $1.1 million for a building that its own
staff said was worth less than $450,000.
Hmm. So either somebody was getting a
sweet, sweet insider deal on their assessment
in order to pay lower property taxes, or the
County is dumb enough to pay three times
what it thinks the building is worth. Your tax
dollars at work, everybody.
Oh, and the County says this new
building needs a significant, expensive
remodel too, on top of the $1.1 million. Hey,
why wouldnt it?
\m/
Mike Reynolds
Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

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There are those who dont consider something

as art unless it has an immediately recognizable

never being the same painting twice.

Every part of the day, with the different

form, much in the same vein as those who dont lighting, they look different, she said. The
consider any verse as poetry unless it rhymes.

painting changes all day long.

Such people arent looking close enough.

This is absolutely true. While meeting

The point of abstract art is not what it

with her, I noticed the paintings change

shows the viewer, but what the viewer finds color as the light shifted from cloudy to

within. Abstract art is a simulacrum, in the sunny. With those shifts, the hues and,

same way we see shapes in clouds and thus, the shapes within those hues became
faces in old trees. What can make abstract different works of art.
intriguing is that what is within can change,

Razzy had spent 30 years as a successful

just as clouds shift their forms. This process is accountant, but was massively unhappy. She
what artist Sheryll Razzy Schoolfied refers found art as a way to get through the anxiety
to as what you see is where youre at.

attacks, which she now positively reaffirms as

(Note: Traditional art works the same just got to paint attacks. She said because of
way, its just that some people dont notice).

art, her anxiety attacks turned into exhilaration.

I wont go into detail as to what I see

I was painting for me, she said. Then

within Razzys work because his would only

I started putting them on my Facebook page

prompt someone elses views, thus act as

and they started flying, and then Gallery RK

a spoiler. But I will say that her work acts picked me up.
simultaneously on macro and micro spatial

For the process, Razzy says she utilizes

levels, the star-breeding nebula and the whatever is at hand. She strokes paint,
quantum particles. They create and pull apart,

throws paint, slaps paint, daubs paint

only to create once again. Her works do this

and sprays paint. She uses paintbrushes,

over and over again, thus each paining is a toothbrushes and plastic knives. But there is
constantly changing piece, never replicating, a definitive method involved.
6

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example, sometimes I will spray paint the
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Indeed, if you hold one of Razzys

B A R

finds joy in their creation. She doesnt even

&

G R I L L

paintings up to the light, you can see name her pieces, leaving that to the owner.
another abstract work underneath, acting

Thursday

Razzys modus operandi is to create

as nourishment to what is on top, art something positive, paintings

feeding art.

that avoid negativity because, she said,

She also utilizes what she likes to call it all comes from God.
cross pollinating the color, where every

When asked which one of the paintings

strand of color has a touch of the dominate is her favorite, she said it is always the last
color, similar to thematic structure of one Ive done.
Picassos Blue and Rose periods, but much,
much more colorful.

You can find Razzys work at her

Facebook page, Razzys Divinely Inspired

The full effect of her processes becomes Art and Poetry. However, it is best to see her
works that are beautifully luminescent and works up close and personal, and you can
transparent.

Razzys

paintings

offer

do so at Gallery RK in Gruene Lake Village.

soothing movement that utilizes shapes that

If you would like to meet the artist,

are easy on the eyes, and dressed in and

Razzy will be holding an exhibition at the

upon calming hues.

Gallery on Saturday, May 9 from 1-6 p.m.

During our interview, a gentleman She will be painting during the exhibition,
walked over to take look at her works. Ah, so viewers will get to watch a unique artist
purple, he said.
You see purple you know it must be a
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In The Ramada INN
830.625.8017

Best Damn Lunch Special

in New Braunfels!
12-4 Monday-Friday
$6.99 Lunch Specials
Specials Include Drink and Side

Live Trivia

Tuesdays 7:30 - 9:30

50Wednesdays
Cent Wing

Your NBA PLAYOFF

Headquarters!
Beer Specials!

830.620.9091 www.scoresnb.com
223 W San Antonio St, Downtown NB

S O U N D C H E C K B R O U G H T T O Y O U B Y:

TXCITIZEN.COM

SOUND TOWN
OUT
OF

Fri 5.1
Cheatham Street Warehouse
Todd Snider
9pm

The Continental Club

Club Lineup:
The Blues Specialists
6:30pm
Rosie & the Ramblers
w/ Jimbo Mathus
9pm, $10

Sat 5.2

Club Lineup:
Soul Track Mind
w/ Dre Mazzenga

Hillary York, 8:30pm

w/ Mayeux & Broussard

7pm, 18+, $20-$25

Luckenbach Dance Hall

Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

Floores Country Store

Kacey Musgraves
w/ Sugar + The Hi-Lows

Luckenbach Dance Hall

Ben Beckendorf
1pm

1pm

Frank Gomez Band

4pm
Shelley King
6pm

Sams Burger Joint

Carolyn Wonderland

8pm

Sams Burger Joint

Ruben V & Jimmy Spacek
8pm, $10-$45

w/ Jelly Bread

Stubbs BBQ

8pm, $15-$60

Walk the Moon

Stubbs BBQ

w/ The Griswolds

Cherub

7pm, Outside, $28-$125

w/ Mystery Skulls, Fortebowie

Reptar

7pm, Outside, $22-$120

w/ Party Plants

Triple Crown
Mark Jungers
6pm

11pm, Inside, $15

Triple Crown

Lesser Antilles, Talk Radio,

The Real Hands, Mon Freres Amigos,

Drive on Mak, For Elise

Shady Rest Band, Broke Folks

9pm

5pm

10

Special Events Monthly

Private Parties- Catering
Wedding Facilities Available
Never a Cover!
Kid & Pet Friendly!
1263 Gruene Road 830.625.1045
Call for Hours!

omalovesyou.com

Thursdays Nights

Old Ice House

Karaoke
Thursdays, Sundays

DJ
Wednesdays, Fridays, Saturdays

7pm, 18+, $23-$28

Kevin Deal
Lewis & Martin

Karaoke

Redd Volkaert, 3:30pm

Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

The Bellamy Brothers

Happy Cow

The Continental Club

Gallery Lineup:

Floores Country Store

Friday Nights, 8pm

9pm

Robert Kraft Trio, 8:30pm

7pm, 21+ $23, 18+ $30

Karaoke

Todd Snider

8pm, $10

Easton Corbin

Freiheit Country Store

Cheatham Street Warehouse

Gallery Lineup:

Cowboys Dancehall

diversions

BEST
OF THE
WURST

2014

double winner!

Best Beer Bar

& Best Bartenders

Upcoming Events:
APRIL 30
@ 6 JAM NIGHT

MAY 1
@ 6 PROM NIGHT
WITH THE FILLMORE EXPERIENCE
THEME: QUADROPHENIA

MAY 2
@ 1 BILL MIDDLETON
@ 6 KIM AND HER BAD HABITS

Phoenix Saloon

Karaoke
Thursday Nights

Prickly Pear Lounge

Karaoke
Thursdays, Saturdays

DJ KC
Fridays

The Watering Hole Saloon

Karaoke

MAY 3

Thursdays

CLOSED

DJ
Fridays, Saturdays

AD SALES 830.358.2493

MOS T WAN T ED Freeman

COMAL COUNTYS
AUGUSTINE,
MICHAEL ERIC

Male 600 200 lbs

DOB: 02/16/1973
CHARGE: Driving
while intoxicated 3rd
or more

AYERS,
MEDELLIN, JESSE
RODRIGUEZ
SHAUN
HENRY
Male 507 200 lbs
Male
601 200 lbs
DOB: 01/01/1976
CHARGE:
Possession
DOB:
12/21/1979
of a controlled
CHARGE:
substance pg 1 under
Unauthorized
use
1 gram and theft
of of
propertyCt
under
vehicle
I and$1500
with 2 or more
evading
Ct II
previous arrest
convictions

HEDGECOCK,
WILLIAM TROY

LUERA,
ALFONSO

Male 510 214 lbs

DOB: 06/05/1965
CHARGE: Driving
while intoxicated
w/child under 15 yoa

NICHOLS,
BRIAN JAMES
Male 511 260 lbs
DOB: 04/15/1982
CHARGE: Injury child
w/intent bodily injury

RODRIGUEZ,
LAURA
RODARTE

Male 507 143 lbs

DOB: 05/10/1977
Female 503 185 lbs
CHARGE: Bail
DOB: 05/14/1973
jumping and failure to CHARGE: Bail jumping
appear
and fail to appear

HERNANDEZ,
RUBEN JR
Male 509 189 lbs
DOB: 05/05/1969
CHARGE: Motion to
revoke probation for
theft property over
$1500 under $20k

ED

T
ARRES

JENKINS,
KIMBERLY
CAROLE

STONE,
AMY LAUREN
Female 505 120 lbs
DOB: 02/27/1985
CHARGE: Failure to
appear for driving
while intoxicated 3rd
or more

TURNER,
LARRY RAY JR

Male 510 158 lbs

Female 503 150 lbs
DOB: 08/02/1972
DOB: 04/12/1968
CHARGE: Possession
CHARGE: Possession
controlled substance
controlled substance
pg1 under 1g
pg1 under 1g

$300
REWARD

FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMAL

COUNTYS MOST WANTED. Callers will remain anonymous.

830.620.3400 - 24-Hour
830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

The names listed have been released in accordance with the Texas Public Information Act. This is a true
and accurate account as of Monday, April 27, 2015 at 8:17 a.m. and may not be current by the time it is
read. Do not try to apprehend anyone. These are listings of criminal warrants with the Comal County
Sheriffs Office and are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verify the status of each warrant
prior to making an arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

TXCITIZEN.COM

on Sports WITH BRANT FREEMAN

Gorge Yourself

Now that weve gotten to know one another,

its time for that second date! Going to the
movies is now acceptable, but meeting
parents is coming on TOO STRONG at this
stage. Speaking of dating, this might not be
the best weekend for first dates, marriages, or
anything involving romance. This weekend,
namely Saturday, the sports universe will be
full of headline material: The Kentucky Derby,
Spurs-Clippers Game 7 (maybe, as Im writing
this the series is 2-2), the last day of the NFL
Draft, and the highly anticipated Floyd
Mayweather/Manny Pacquiao fight from Las
Vegas (for the low, low price of $100).
If I had to choose ONE of those to
watch, well, thats easy, Im going with the
Spurs every time. But the way everything is
shaping up, you may not have to pick. You
can start your day off with the final day of
the NFL Draft which starts at 11am Saturday,
but its just rounds four through seven. If you
choose watching your team pick kickers
theyll cut in training camp or that sixth round
quarterback that will become the next Tom
Brady (he wont) over, say, going outside
shame on you. The only interesting television
when it comes to the draft is the first round.
After that, stay up to date on what your team
is doing through social media. I would watch
an ALF marathon before I would watch the
NFL Draft after the first day.
Next up: The Kentucky Derby. Lets be
honest, the only reason anyone watches the
Derby is for the parties. Awesome hats and
mint juleps (SIGN ME UP). You get to enjoy
that for about an hour or two until the actual
race, which lasts all of two minutes. I have
to imagine the Derby is one of those events
thats incredible to be at, but television doesnt
do it justice. Again, its the socializing that
makes it memorable, not the race itself. Can
the average sports fan name a famous horse
besides Secretariat? Last years derby winner?
And why arent there parties for The Preakness
or Belmont, the other two races as part of the
Triple Crown? I need answers horse people.
Alright, so after checking Twitter for NFL
Draft updates, (Go Titans! *slams head into
a door*), and mint juleps, its time for Spurs-

Clippers Game Seven. Thats potentially, of

course - the series could be over by the time
this is published. If it was Clippers in six, Ill
be having approximately 18 mint juleps on
Saturday. If its Spurs in six 16 mint juleps.
The game could also be starting before/during
the Kentucky Derby, depending on whether
or not there are any other Game Sevens on
Saturday. I imagine that no matter the case,
if there is a Game Seven in LA, TNT and the
NBA will be sure to schedule it BEFORE the
biggest event of the evening even starts
Mayweather vs. Pacquiao. The Showtime
pay-per-view starts at 8pm Saturday, but the
main event shouldnt start until 10pm or so.
The price to watch is steep, but this should be
an historic boxing match, and the sport needs
it. I grew up in the era inwhich boxing started
to fade from the national stage. For over 4
decades, from the 1940s to the 1980s, boxing
was the premiere sport in America, next to
baseball (times have REALLY changed). Sugar
Ray Robinson, Sonny Liston, Muhammad Ali,
Joe Frazier, George Foreman, Larry Holmes,
Mike Tyson, Bald Bull, Evander Holyfield,
Marvin Hagler, Oscar De La Hoya, these
were the biggest names in sports in the U.S.
Boxing has since taken a backseat, but over
the last decade or so, if you asked the casual
fan which fighters they were familiar with,
they would say Mayweather or Pacquiao.
Will this one fight bring back the Golden
Age of Boxing? Probably not, but for those
(hopefully at least) ten rounds, we wont care.
We wont be able to look away, knowing that
what we are watching is history. The Super
Bowl, NBA Finals, World Series, Kentucky
Derby those come around every year. A
fight like this? You may have to wait another
20 years to see one like it.
Enjoy your Saturday of sports, and
if your date wants to watch it all with you,
marry them on Sunday.

Brant Freeman is a seasoned local sportscaster, serving

as the radio voice of Texas State University since 2003,
hosting television coverage of Texas State Athletics and
delivering the goods as a reporter for major sporting
events in the greater San Antonio area for over 10
years. Were proud to welcome him to the TX Citizen.
11

Dont Miss
The Prickly Pears
Cinco de Mayo
Double-Shot!

By Gustavo Arellano in America illegally. I replied honestly

7pm The Texas National Taco Eating Championships

Taco Palenque wants to test your consumption prowess in this throwdown to name a
Pirata-eating campen! The fastest to devour the mostest wins $100 cash and
gastro-glory for a year!

9pm - The Texas National Margarita Mixing Championships

Think your from-scratch margaritas deserve the Texas National title? Well provide
the tequila and a pitcher, you bring the mixological magic. $100 cash and
near-deification to the winner!
Both champions get featured in the May 7 edition of the TX Citizen
Space in each event is extremely limited logon to Facebook.com/txcitizen for registration info!

TUESDAY,
MAY 5 @ 7PM

the

ASK A MEXICAN!

new

1051 N I-35
Ramada INN

PRICKLY PEAR

BAR

The Prickly Pears Cinco de Mayo Double-Shot benefits the New Braunfels Puppy Playland and
Callens Castle NBs park for special needs kids, and is proudly sponsored by Taco Palenque!

Dear Mexican: Why do Mexicans

make up such glaringly obvious lies?
Like this galn who had his sister call
me and said it was really him, with a
cold. Or my friend who pretends to
be traveling around the world but
is really sending emails from his
mothers home computer. Or the
random person on the street who
tells you he knows how to give you
directions, and then just makes them
up. Do they have something against
reality, or do they really believe
themselves on some level?
Clara la Dudosa
Dear Clara the Doubter: There is
nothing new about Mexicos tradition of
lying, of course, wrote Andres Oppenheimer
in his 1998 Bordering on Chaos: Guerrillas,

TM

The SUN'S surface is 27 million degrees

Summer in Texas is nearly twice that hot

Stockholders, Politicians and Mexicos Road

for ONLY $85!

Or get on the waiting
list for repairs.
( Free + painful repair expenses )

GUA DA C O MA
830.625.2420 1617 BUSINESS 35 S.
GUADACOMA@NBTX.COM
12

Dear Gabacho: Konichiwa! Although

it seems self-evident why Mexicans continue

to migrate to the United Statesbetter

to Prosperity. Since as far as historians opportunities, just like every immigrant group
could remember, double talk and deceit that has ever come herewhat makes them

had been part of Mexicos culture. This sour on their patria is a little more telling. A
line has been used by Know Nothings ever 2014 Pew Research Center poll found that a
since as proof that Mexicans are never to be

Get your AC inspected now

and we entered a discussion about why

that was. (Its in the news all the time
still no excuse but hey, Im human and
subject to flaws on occasion).
After doing some research into
the Mexican economy, they seem to be
doing very well among Latin American
countries as far as unemployment
rates and economic growth. I wonder:
are the benefits only going to a few
at the top and large corporations, or
are the wages paid pathetically low
with no labor unions to negotiate for
better pay? What is the main factor or
factors that encourage people to risk
so much to get here? Please forgive my
ignorance on these matters and help
me understand the larger picture.
Hoping to Become an Immigrant

trustednever mind that Oppenheimer is an

third of Mexicans would migrate to the U.S.

if they couldbut whereas 60 percent said

elitist Argentine carajo.

the economy is a big problem, 79 percent

Mexicans lie for the same reason said crime is the countrys biggest issue. Also
anyone makes mentiras: to protect oneself, to beating the economy on list of concerns were
try to gain an advantage over someone else,

corrupt political leaders (72 percent), cartel

and to ultimately come out on top. And if you

violence (also 72), water and air pollution

think thats somehow a uniquely Mexican

(70 and 69, respectivelyand gabachos say

characteristic, then you must also believe

Mexicans dont care about the environment!).

President Obama when he says the guvmint Even corrupt police officers beat the economy
aint spying on you, or that he has the best as a topic of concern for Mexis.
interests of Mexicans in mind while deporting
us in record numbers.

At this point in Mexicos history, its

time to push the reset button and start a
revolutionor, do what weve been doing

Dear
Mexican:
Hola!
(Full and migrate to the U.S. Because why revolt
disclosure I am trying to move to Japan in one country when you can do it in two?
and have been studying the language
Ask the Mexican at
for two years) To my shame, when
themexican@askamexican.net,
one of my Japanese associates posed
be his fan on Facebook, follow him on
the question What do you think of
Twitter @gustavoarellano or follow him
when you hear the word immigrant
on Instagram @gustavo_arellano!
I first thought of a Mexican national
AD SALES 830.358.2493

TXCITIZEN.COM

13

THE RESULTS ARE IN!

Your Official Guide to NB's Favorite Ever y thing

Best Dang Margarita in Town

Adobe Verde's Dos Rita

Best Cheeseburger
Phoenix Saloon

Best Place to Pick Up

Essentials Before One of
"Those Kinds" of Dates

Best Grilled Cheese Sandwich

The Perky Peacock

Phoenix Saloon's Frito-Pie

Best Baristas

Best Sports Bar

Gourmage of Texas

Best Snackage

Best Coffee for the

Hardcore Java-Head

Kora Kora Coffee

The Black Whale Pub

Kora Kora Coffee

Best Cheese Steak

Best First Date Bar

Best Local Treat Too Good to

Waste on Kids

Spud Ranch
Olive's Italian Market

Best Classic Cheese Enchiladas

Best Place to Pretend

You're in a Really Great,
All-Summer-Long
Beer Commercial

El Nopalito

Best Indie Classic Cheese Pizza

New York Pizza Pub

Best Cheese-Based Pastry

Naegelin's Cheese Pocket

Best Mac & Cheese

CBQ Smokehouse

Best Place to Trigger an Insulin Spike

2 Tarts

Best Place to Initiate

Corporate Sugar Rush
Dairy Queen

Best Corporate Pizza

Papa Murphy's

Best Indie Brisket

Granzin Bar-B-Q

Best Indie Breakfast Tacos

Lone Star Float House

Best Texas Mojo

Freiheit Country Store

Best Wine Bar

Kork

Best Patio/Deck/Backyard Bar

Pour Haus

Best City Politician

Mayor, and Eighth Wonder of the World,
Barron Casteel

Worst City Politician

District One Councilman George Green

Best Use of Taxpayer Funds

New Dog Park (Puppy Playland)

Los Gallos

Worst Use of Taxpayer Funds

Best Small-Chain Breakfast Taco

The Still Incomplete Walnut Avenue

Widening Project

El Nopalito

Best Pub-Style Bar

Calahan's
14

Best Meatball Sub

Sweet Dreams' Elvis Cupcake

Coolest City-Owned Vehicle

NBPD's Tank

Vino en Verde

Best Full-On Texas Style Bar

Phoenix Saloon

Most Egregious Abuse of Power

District One Councilman George Greens Filing of
Police Report Against Comal County Fair
Association Member Based on Third-Hand Rumor
that the Association is Wanting Blood or
Wanting My Blood or Theyre Out for Blood (he
doesnt know for sure) in Response to Councilman
George Greens Attempt to Revoke Fair
Associations Fairground Lease as Retaliation for
Failing to Provide Councilman George Green with
Special Parking at Fairgrounds

Best Place to Store Your In-Laws After

Three Days at Your House
Gruene River Inn

Most Transparent Attempt to Pander to

Advertisers via Ridiculous Readers Poll
Categories Created by the
Houston-Owned Herald-Zeitung
Best Funeral Home

Best Place to Plan White-Collar Crime

Wursthalle

Best Place to Hang Out After a Hard

Morning at Church
The Forbidden Island of Booneville Avenue
TX CITIZEN
AD SALES 830.358.2493

AROUND&ABOUT
Crawfish season has heated up real good, and for our money, a
homegrown crustacean boil beats the pants off the big corporate
boys' every single time. Our pal Hampton slung the mud-bugs
both this-way-and-that out at Scores last Sunday, to hoards of
grateful crawfish enthusiasts. No gator attacks reported.

2015
BANQUET
Thursday, May 14
NB Civic Center
Doors Open at 6pm
Smoked Prime Rib
Open Bar

LIVE AUCTION
20 Plus Items

RAFFLES

ic
lass er!
C
t
g
s
r
Be sebu
e
Che

TexaBest
sBar Style
!
Double

Winner!

HORSE HEALTH
& NUTRITION EVENT
AT TRACTOR SUPPLY

Saturday, May 2
from 10am to 3pm

60 Plus Items
Waterfowl Kit
Upland Kit
Whitetail Kit

GOOSE BANDS

Pick of the Litter

DPMS 5.56 Recon

DU MERCHANDISE

Gun of the Year

Knife of the Year
Print of the Year
Decoy of the Year
Greenwing Corner

KEY DU SUPPLIERS

Benelli BOYT Browning

Buck Ducks Unlimited
DPMS Glock NASCAR
Mossberg Remington
Ruger Savage Stoger
Tanglefree TriStar
YETI Yilidiz

TICKETS

Single-$75 Couple-$125
Hands-on Activities
Nutrena Feed Reps
Local Horse Clubs

Corporate Table-$700(10)
Sponsor Table-$900(10)

Contact (830) 629-4216

Available at Door

830.626.3026 tractorsupply.com
TXCITIZEN.COM

15

Massage | Waxing | Facials | Makeup

Call our
AWARD
WINNING
TEAM!
830.620.7653

$10 Off
your swimsuit purchase!

15% OFF

one hour or more service

Limit one per person. May not be combined with any other offer.
173 S. Seguin St 830.214.0728

Not valid with all service providers. Expires May 31, 2015

1528 E Common St | 830.608.9111

HELP WANTED

PRICKLY PEAR LOUNGE

NOW HIRING

THE PHOENIX SALOON

NOW HIRING

Must be hands on with good people skills.

Responsible for schedules, promotions,
cost control, training, etc. TABC certified.
Appy in person at the Ramada.
1051 IH-35, New Braunfels.

Applications in the bar!

193 W San Antonio St,
Downtown New Braunfels

EXPERIENCED BAR
MANAGER

BRING IN THIS AD AND

YOUR FIRST TREATMENT IS

EXPERIENCED
BARTENDER

1361 Ervendberg Ave, New Braunfels, TX 78130

6/3, 5747 sq ft. Designed for ease of
maintenance while providing for study, play,
and entertainment. On 2.68 acres only walking
distance to Historic Gruene Hall and the
Guadalupe River. Designed by Schneider

1669 Canyon Lake Dr, Canyon Lake, TX 78133

3/2, 2081 sq ft. This home has been remodeled
and features newly installed tile, carpet,
granite, appliances, paint, huge balcony, and
so much more. Enjoy the lake view from the
Balcony deck. Home sits on 3 lots for privacy

Custom Homes. List Price: $875,000

and ability to expand. List Price: $189,888

28540 Durango Dr, New Braunfels, TX 78132

3/1, 3700 sq ft. Have you needed a home and
an office where the office is more important
than the home? Then this home is perfect for
you! The home is well built and can be
expanded easily. A one of a kind that must be

7184 Fair Ranch Rd, Rocksprings, TX 78880

Pasture/Ranch/Agricultural, 655.99 AC. Great
hunting for exotic and native animals. 4 blinds
and 4 feeders. 2 homes, one stand alone (3/1)
and a bunk home (3/2) located inside building
plus equipment barn, walk in cooler, workshop,

seen to appreciate. List Price: $398,888

and other buildings. List Price: $1,800,000

New and Vintage Vinyl

and Turntables

Classic Rock Alternative Punk

Reggae - Funk Soul Country
A $30 Value. New Patients Only. Cannot Be Combined
With Other Offers. Offer Expires May 31, 2015

BUY SELL TR ADE

(830) 822-6315

comalspringsca.com

243 N. Union Ave

830-629-2662 Like us on

Half-Off One Entree

with purchase of another entree and two drinks.

One coupon per table. Cannot be combined with any other offer. Expires 05/31/15

Huge Play Area for the Kids Live Music Thursday-Sunday

Happy Hour Monday-Friday 3:00-6:30pm

Winner!

TEX-MEX COCINA Y CANTINA

830.629.0777 1724 Hunter Road, New Braunfels

Check out these listings & more

online at DLeeEdwardsRealty.com
1111 N. Walnut Ave. New Braunfels, TX