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Anyone can learn to flirt, or brush up on their skills of seduction.

Leigh van den Berg guides us through the ABCs of flirting.

When it comes to the fine art of flirting, a
little bit of self-confidence, a friendly
smile and these simple tips and tricks will
transform even the most dateless disaster
into a red-hot Casanova faster than you
can say hey baby, what s your sign?
(And you will also learn that saying
something like that is a very bad thing.)
Flirting from afar
You will be amazed what a single, wellaimed look can achieve when it comes to
scoring with the opposite sex. Making
eye contact is the first and easiest thing
you could ever do to show someone that
they have got your attention.
First, lock down on your target, be it
Craig from accounts or the stunner at the
end of the bar, by shooting them a coy,
fleeting glance. When your eyes meet,
hold their gaze for one sweet second
before looking down or away. This move
can be repeated as often as you feel is
necessary (bearing in mind that there is a
fine line between a flirty flash and a
staring stalker ) to give your chosen
hottie the OK to approach you. However,
if they remain put, it is best to just write
them off as taken, very shy or simply not
Mandy, a self-confessed serial flirter,
suggests hunting in packs.
I like to walk through a crowd of
potentials while my friends sit back
and watch, she says. Later they will tell
me which men gave me the eye or
checked me out, so I ll know exactly
which guys to flirt with as the night
1. How To Kiss A Girl: A
In most of my products and articles, I rarely
go into much depth about how to kiss a girl.
In my opinion, sexual escalation (like kissing) is more of an outgrowth of sexual tension. In The 4 Elements of Game I define kissing as a release behavior something that
releases the tension created when you re
interacting with a woman in an attractive,
masculine way.
However, I know some guys out there like
a more thorough and detailed explanation
of how to kiss a girl. (This morning my inbox was flooded with the subject line How
To Kiss A Girl? ). Thus, I want to take this
opportunity to further explain what I know
about how to kiss a girl.
Phase: White

Duration: The duration of your relationship

Objective: Set yourself up for an enjoyable relationship
Pitfalls to Avoid: Continuing the play
the game with a girl you know is
Once you succeed in making your move, you
don t need to concern yourself too much with
strategy and techniques. If your girl accepts your move (e.g., she kisses you), then
she s made a very conscious choice that
you re a guy she wants to be with so don t
cause her change her mind back!
In the appendix, there s a section on the
over-gaming trap, which we reprinted
(with permission) from The Advanced Dating Strategies. Understand that the completion of the red phase signals a woman s
waypoint. You re now a guy she finds attractive!
Phase: Red
Duration: 1 encounter
Objective: Get her in a one-on-one setting and pull the trigger
Pitfalls to Avoid: Getting cold feet at
the last second and not going for it
Congratulations! If you ve made it this far
in the emotional progression, then your girl
is just itching for you to make a move. You
have a rare window of opportunity that you
absolutely MUST capitalize on before you
miss your chance.
Again, this can t be stressed enough: you
have ONE shot at this. For the last month
and a half, you ve slowly built up to this moment, and now you need to cash in your
chips. Waiting, hesitating, or failing to execute a move here will negate all the great
work you ve done up until this point.
Now, be warned: she may not give you a
clear-cut signal that she wants you to make
a move. There s no universal sign that she
At any rate there are things that are going to stop her from cheating, but these
things will obviously not stop a woman that is going to cheat regardless.
A man can only do but so much
No man should spend his entire existence laser-focused on what NOT TO DO
and what TO DO to stop her from cheating.
That s insanity
For the most part you should:
1. Value yourself - which should allow you to project overall value as well
as sexual value.
2. Value her - which should provide her with overall excitement as well as
sexual excitement.
What is her perception of how much you value yourself?
which has nothing to
do with how much you actually value yourself.
What is her perception of how much you value her?
which has nothing to do
with how much you actually value her.

This is a topic within it self, the bottom line is for many women cheating becom
a justifiable opportunity if: You do not value her enough and/or you do not valu
yourself enough.
And just like the women that will cheat regardless, you will have some women
that will never cheat regardless.
If that wasn t enough let s look at some other things and let s start putting some
things together.
For the most part a relationship can become a routine. And in general women do
not do well with routines.
They want spice.
They want excitement.
So what do you think happens when she becomes bored? And she doesn't view
you as sexually exciting.
So let s say:
The Taboo Meter (quick reference):
Level High: [Super Sneaky] She has about 10 or more Taboo Sex Events
each containing multiple Taboo Sex Elements.
Level Medium: [Average]
She has about 3-4 Taboo Sex Events with some
containing multiple Taboo Sex Elements.
Level Low: [Non-Tabooer or Liar] She has about 0-1 Taboo Sex Events.
It is very critical that you find out her Taboo Level because this may reveal th
frequency of excitement you need to provide her with unless you are convinced
(or she has you fooled) that she is no longer associated with the acts in her pa
For her, taboo is perceived excitement.
Feed her with the needed excitement and variety so that she doesn t starve.
Again, the reason why a married woman will often cheat is because of her desire
to experience a naughty experience .
The guy experiencing this woman probably noticed two things:
1. She was hyper sexual in the bedroom/car/office/etc.
2. His efforts to have sex with her were amazingly easy.
As a result:
Married Women are Easier to Seduce - mainly because even the most
reserved woman will do all of the work. In seconds, a woman can strategically
plan events that they desire to experience. She will make it happen once she
reaches the point where she feels she has to get a taste of this outside guy s
energy. His sexual value magnetizes her to him.
Married Women are Easier to Seduce if you are the guy that is married to
her. If she loves you and wants to be with you, then she wants you to create
those bubbly feelings in her. The kind of feelings she had when she was a little
girl having a crush on some older guy. She wants you to have sexual value - just
Independent women are good women to find if you don t have a lot of time to invest
in a
relationship, or you re the type of guy who needs a lot of space. Independent wome
n have full,
rich lives of their own and are happy to pursue their own interests with or with
out you.
Independent women usually want a man in their life, but never need a man in thei
r life. Plus,
they re never looking for men to solve their problems or blame men when things don t
go their
Women who agree with everything you say, who suddenly like the same music you do

and who
don t understand the concept of me time are needy. They literally need you to be in
presence or on the phone or they re unhappy. Most needy women have deep psychologi
problems, so you should avoid getting involved with them. Problems arise when yo
u decide to
end things; annoying phone calls turn into broken tail lights, which turn into c
alls to your boss
and even break-ins at your house. If you think the woman you re talking to might b
e a needy type,
walk away.
Loyal women never cheat on you or stay on the lookout for a better deal. When you
go out,
loyal women don t scan the room for other guys, but keep their attention focused o
n you, the man
in their life. They re also more likely to stick around if times get tough. Most w
omen have the
capacity for loyalty, you just have to demonstrate that you re worthy of it.
Elusive women can at first come across as flirty and romantic, but you eventuall
y find out
they re one of the walking wounded women who were hurt in a past relationship. Elusive
women sabotage their relationships so they never get hurt again. Dealing with el
usive women is
an exercise in frustration as they initially show great interest in you and then
quickly end any
possibility of taking things further. They may repeat this cycle many times, so
once you start
getting a lot of pushback from an elusive woman, end it.
2) Becoming impatient
The universe works at its own speed; remember, every action carries with it an
equal and opposite reaction. It is essential that the other environmental
conditions be right in order for an event to occur just as it should.
This means that the law of attraction may take
weeks, months or even years to effect a fruitful
reaction to the desires of a single individual.
People of today s society are spoiled; they want
what they want and they want it now. A new
theory that does not produce instant results is
not going to be received with a great deal of
In addition to that, disbelieving in the law of
attraction because it does not meet your
established timetables (after all, it never says precisely when all of these
wonderful rewards will be reaped, only that they will) is a direct violation of
the guidelines required to see positive results in and of itself. You were merel
testing the law in order to see if it will produce results; if you were confiden
in its ability to effect the desired results you would be content to sit and wai
knowing that what you want most will come to you in time.
On the other hand, the fact that you are not indicates that you do not have
confidence in its ability to bring about the desired results. This means that
somewhere in your being is a small kernel of negative energy, sufficient to
throw a monkey wrench into the whole process of positive attraction.
Remember, if you are vibrating negative energy you will attract negative

energy back onto yourself.

3) Determining ahead of time how and when you will attract what you want
Let the universe work! It is possible to become so focused on what you think
is going to happen that you manage to totally miss the event when it occurs if
it does not occur in precisely the manner you pictured it would.
As we said before, the universe will choose its own time and place for all thing
to occur, and these events may take place through rather unusual means. By
predetermining exactly how you will receive the rewards which you are
seeking you are taking away the choice from the hands of nature, which direct
the ebb and flow of the energies of life, and setting yourself up for a hard fal
By taking the ability to choose upon yourself you are essentially saying that
you do not have faith in the ability of the law of attraction to effect the desi
There are many reasons why family members may find themselves at odds with each
other; it is not necessarily a pre-requisite that you like the people you love,
and for
families who often find themselves in each other s back pockets and competing for
common resources the fights can become vicious.
Regardless of the reasons you and your family may have had for your falling out
it is never good to leave relationships festering like that. You need to fix the
m in
order to achieve true serenity and harmony in your life (have you begun yet to n
how closely the law of attraction interacts with other laws which govern the
universe?). In order to fix a relationship that has been broken you must first b
confident in the fact that you not only are going to be able to mend the broken
but that you truly want to.
It is very easy to utter lip service to the people around you, telling them that
want to mend your broken fences (and often blaming the fact that they are broken
the other party involved, of course) when in reality you continue to carry the s
tain of
dislike that you hold towards the other person in question. You don t really want
mend your fences, or if you do you have not yet let go of what has caused the
separation in the first place.
Letting go of your resentment is an essential ingredient in finding harmony, for
order for the law of attraction to be able to work to smooth your way you must f
rid yourself of all of the negative energy you have been sending towards them so
It is important that you accept the fact that you can forgive and forget, allowi
ng the
two of you to move on with your life with a much happier relationship than you h
experienced to date.
The process of attracting a significant other is much the same; however, in orde
for the law of attraction to be able to attract them to you, you must be very sp
when making your request to the universe regarding exactly what it is that you a
looking for in a relationship.

This does not mean that you should outline the color of
their hair, their eyes, their political background (although if
this is of primary importance to you it may be worth submitting
it for consideration) or their political position in society.
Remember, the law of attraction means that your
subconscious mind is going to be drawn to their
subconscious mind, and politics are not going to be of
primary importance there. Instead, focus on the kind of
values you wish for them to possess, the type of relationship that you are looki
ng to
share with them (do you want to get married, date casually, etc) as well as pers
traits which you feel are especially important. Then allow yourself to believe t
hat you
are going to find this paragon of virtue.
What is the Premise of the Law of Attraction?
The theory behind the law of attraction is the belief that energy attracts like
energy in the vast expanse of space and time that comprises our universe. Each p
erson s
being is constantly radiating energy out into space; the type of energy being ra
diated is
determined by the emotional state of the individual in question and may differ f
rom day
to day-sometimes even hour to hour!
This emotional energy is what is commonly known as a vibe and is referred to
as a vibration by scientists studying the law of attraction. Chances are that yo
u are
familiar with the term. Have you ever been with someone who is so happy they see
m to
be radiating a glow which inspires happiness in all those around them? By the sam
token, have you ever spent time with someone who was so critical and unhappy tha
t they
consistently gave off a negative vibe which seemed to suck the life and happiness
of all those around them?
You do not have to possess psychic powers to be able to feel the vibes that peop
emit; this energy is very real on a psychological plane and will affect anyone,
at any time. Our vibrations(emotional energy) are usually an unconscious respons
e to some form of
environmental stimulus; something has happened which has caused us to feel happy
, or
sad, or scared, or confused, or stressed, etc., and our subconscious response to
(because vibes are generated and projected from the subconscious rather than the
conscious) is something that is beyond our control.
Chances are the person who is emitting a negative vibe does not
hoose to be unhappy, nor do they wish to inflict their unhappiness on all
those around them by the simple fact of their presence. (Before you say
what you are thinking, yes, there are some exceptions to this rule. Misery
does love company and there are many who take a great deal of delight in
inflicting their pain on other people. It is important to understand that this
is not usually done in a desire to cause others pain but out of a desire to not
feel so alone in their unhappiness. But will digress )
There are a number of feelings which lead to positive and negative vibes being
emitted, and it is important before we continue on any form of discussion about
the law

of attraction that you understand what each of these are (you ll understand the re
asons for
this, a little later).