.

.)

December 7-20, 1981

!'C,'

Issue 26

Les~ian Politics
1
-~-:;-~~--=~~~=--=1\ in the '80s
f~Y

;:;L

Er;;tk7ila.\phemy
by Dorothy Allison
hen I am in .one -0f my mystic mo()d.s, __ I believe that revelatiori-1.s certain-that understanding will proceed
from the chance connection of one piece
of the puzzle to another through charmed
lines of conversations to the sudden intru-

terest actually happened, there was one

brief flurry of chance connection for me
-the Eros, Language, and Pornography
panel. It featured such divergent types as
Ellen Willis, Amber Hollibaugh, Leah
Fritz, Andrea Dworkin, Lois Gould, John
Stoltenberg, and Ken Norwick. Again, remarkably little was said that was new or
different or even significant. Ellen Willis

L NYPLDJ.rqthy Allison's

Erotic Bla5phemy

by Dorothy Allison

terest actually happened, there was one

brief flurry of chance connection for me
hen I am in one of my mys-the Eros, Language, and Pornography
tic moods, I believe that rev- panel. It featured such divergent types as
elation is certain-that un- Ellen Willis, Amber Hollibaugh, Leah
derstanding will proceed
Fritz, Andrea Dworkin, Lois Gould, John
from the chance connection of one piece Stoltenberg, and Ken N orwick. Ag.tln, reof the puzzle to another through charmed markably little was said that was new or
lines of conversations to the sudden intru- different or even significant. Ellen Willis
sion of a strong image in a song or film,
and Andrea Dworkin acknowledged that
to the more deliberate .revelations of rea- they did not agree on the essential definison in the printed word, the appearance
tions while John S tol ten berg read a range
of important and outrageous books. It de- of selections from scum-and-guts porn in fines me as something of a fatalist but, I a very . loud, very male voice that somebelieve, an active one. After all. I work how undercut what I assume was an atfor my revelations. I read those books,
tempt at a feminist message. It was a
follow those conversations, hunt out strange affair all around, but the two
those films and songs.
'
voices that have stayed with me have
/\1'st of all I anticipate the revelation been those of Leah Fritz and Amber Holof sex and power. I seek the connection libaugh. They presented a dichotomy that
to be made between why people behave I find fearful for what it reveals about the
the way they do and what is to he done
state of feminist theorizing on the issue;
about it. I also constantly pursue a sense of sexuality and pornography. It was the
of community-a bond with my own- language of the feminist critique of pornand being the sexual outlaw that I am
ography that made me nervous-the im!not only lesbian-feminist but macho- plications of what was not being said but
femme flirt), I seek that bond on the
implied. "No, no, we're not calling for
fringe, among women '.or, Goddess help
censorship or attacking First Amendment.
me, menj who speak directly to my own rights, we are only defending our real and
fascinations with risk and power and dif- precious bodies from pornographic atference.
--.tack.')

My friends and lovers indulge me or

encourage me or grow occasionally impatient with my obsessions. ''You getting
mighty damn liberal," someone said to
me recently after I had spent a long dinner questioning what it meant to be alesbian these days anyway, what with publicly avowed politically-identified lesbians
revealing that they sometimes have sex
with men or suggesting that, in fact, they
don't have sex with anyone, that possibly
'til after the revolution we should all
practice au to-eroticism or spiritual celibacy. With all this confusion it is true
that I still define a lesbian as a woman
who sleeps with women, but I am, in liberal fashion, applying few other limitations on what is or is not valid behavior.
At the American Writers Congress last
month, where remarkably little of real in-

That's one story. I was doing another

pand at the Congress and had been on
the phone with organizers all wee)c; I'd
been told, ''Well, Amber Hollibaugh has
been taken off that Pornography panel.
We could shift her to the Homophobia
panel with you." When I asked why, I
was told she was not acceptable to the
other women on the panel-the women
from Woman Against Pornography. I expressed my opinion of that kind of censorship, things got sticky, and for two
days Amber Hollibaugh was the dirty secret of the Nation Institute organizersnow on the panel, now off, now on ,but
with the other panelists shifting. It was an
intriguing dance that wound. up with
Amber back on the panel an:d the Nation
people denying that any other possibility
had ever existed.
(Cont. on page 14)

1'

_,_
/

'

-\

'-

Lesbian Po/iticsin the '80s: sexualBI3Splleilly

rc_ontinued from page 1)

have always believed that telling

the truth about our lives is both
good politics and good art. It is
sometimes. dangerous and always
scary, but it is also .theonly way real
change becomes possible. Otherwise we
wind up constantly edging around the
real, arguing theory as if it had nothing to
do with everyday life, the pursuit of happiness, or simple surviv.al. My own bias is
that it is more possible for "safe" women,
women with lots of margin in their lives,
to address theory from that perspective.
But it regui~es a denial of difference, an
unfamiliarity with the experience of what
this society defines as outside "acceptable," "normal'; lives rwhich in this society . includes women of color, the poor,
and the gueer-queer meaning also those
sexual minorities farther out on the frifrgc
than lesbians and gay men;. When Leah
Fritz stood up and said, "We must stand
in awe vf the collaboratiun of our artists
with this evil, awe at the fact that all revolutions thus far have C(JfflC tu nuthing,''
a chill went up me .and I found myself
wondering, "D<Jt:s she rn(;an me?
\1/hcn CJnC: .bc.:gi11s HJ labc:l "L(Jllab(Jrators with cviJ."' <Jn<: mu::.t ::.peak very ::.pc-

cifically. When pu,pk deny that they arc

f1Jr cc:n.S(Jrship or attack, but practice just that, gucstions must be a.'.>kc:d.

Wbt exactly is this evil. and what cxaccly

is to be drJnc.: with colh.brJrators? N()r can
afford to forget that, a~ far as the maj rJri ty cul turc.: rJ f th i:. cr;u ntry is c oncerncd,
Ne

we arc all chickens in the ;amc pen and

the: h<:J.wks arc: alway:. waiting to catch
th(JSC

\'I(;

thr(JW (JUt

tr)

thc:rn.

When Amb~~ ffollibaugh 'P''kc. the

tjUCStiorr_;~:rJf

11hu get~

d1rr;wn

tu

the:

it mto her fantasy life and who, sees the

contradiction but still finds it perversely
powerful and satisfying.
Nor do we look at the fear-the fear of
being ','-different" or of being exp~sed and
attacked as a "collaborator." We don't
even address -the fear of actually being a,
collaborator, of betraying our own revolution. We cannot talk about these things
without betraying ourselves, one way or
the other. We could die in this silence,
and that that is a betray.al I have no
doubt. One connection at a time, then,
and the first must be to end the silence
and address the fear.

How do we get there from here?

ew people ever address the pleasures of hanging out with old lovers, lovers with whom some of
the immediate passion has faded
but not the caring, commitment, or
shared history. I have that kiJJd of relationship with Arly down in D.C., and

/;~~~i

"

l..ughed, pinching my ankle. "She's leaving on Monday."

'.'It's a . whole new world," Nancy
sighed; and I shrugged.
.
"An't nobody doing anything they
if some other time."
Best of all was the story about Jane. didn't always do, just a few more people
.
We used to work together and I had most- talking aboutit."
"That's the pr.oblem .. Everybody should.
ly liked her while disagreeing-loudly with
her in public. Jane invariably had a lover just go back- to "doing and keeping quiet.
who was besotted with her. "One woman A]j this loud St>J.ff makes me.. nervous,
at a time," she always said, while the cur- people just all the time talking about sex.
rent flame sat breathlessly near and Jane SEX, SEX, SEX. Too much."
"NO, NO." Juanita rocked the wine
talked reverently of famous long-term lesbian liaisons-Alice and Gertrude, Natalie - jiottle ~gainst her thighs and shot me an
Barney and __ _Romaine Brooks. When I almost angry look. "The point is nopointed out that Natalie had been by no body's getting enough. Everybody wants
a little more or a little different. Everymeans
monogamous,
Jane
mer
shrugged, "Which is why it ended so tragi- bo(iy's hungry; an't nOtiody satisfied,"
"That's a fact." Nancy said it so
cally," and remu;ded me of those last
years when Natalie sent piteous messages mournfully, so conclusively that very-'--'
body started laughing.
and Romaine never replied.
"Find that sweet woman a sweet
Jane, it seems, has changed her mind.
She has continued in one relationship for young thing," somebody giggled while
all of two years, but while no one knows Nancy blushed furiously and Arly tugged
of any casual liaisons, she has recently be- at my ankle suggestively.
When I finally went to sleep I dreamed
of half a dozen friends who came to visit
and announced in turn that they had (1)
gone straight; (2) gotten into S/M; (3)
gone all-au t to get rich and famous; or (4)
decided that politics was just an excuse
for insomniacs who didn't care about
sleep anyway.
"You just moved to New York City
because of the Ethiopian restaurants," .a
woman in high heels and leather fuck-me
skirt told n.ie serious! y. "Every body
knows you steal those soft lengths 'of
bread and take them home for towels."
"Naw." Another figure stepped around
thc".first"'and began to slip sharp-edged
gun to speak favorably of "open relatig'n- scallop shells between the lc;ther skirt
ships" and even casual sex. Moreover, she and the other's suddenly nude and tender
has admitted to kinky fantasies and an belly. "S-he waits 'ti! they dry up all stiff

<~!I

bat:R:!

5~~~
J~~~

something have moved away--to Seattle,

Boston, or N_ew York. I tried to be discreet and get th<;ir __11ew. phone numbers
but Arly kicke"d me lightly and said, "Get

pcrjt!'

the" Ii

~~lr~

wha"t
tliai:
ccrltr;

, rile h

tiOn'

me a
and i
starte
elabo
idea i
I coti.
ting ,1
Kink1
MJ
sies 0
baby
flip-ti

From

ly.W

w.oid

nakc.r
it the
page
Rand
in H:1
the-.

Juanita played with the wiry

curls over her left ear and mockdrawled in her lovers's direction,
'Sure, and all this time I thought
she was a secret leather Queen."
Everyone giggled.
1

whenever the vagaries of our lives as fc:minist activists afford we catch each other
up, tea::,c cach ()thcr rncrciJcssly and ~en
1

Joan
ing ti
tei-ed
lookc
wasn

gr~ph

',-ing b\
l$

page 7
had
with'c
"V

v.vHUCllll;51

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:::illt: Illt'.'111 IIJt:=

. :.i~' . ~~ - t-;~'::~t::.::,<_'\1_1:-t.

14

gone all-out to get rich an.d famous; or ( 4)

decided that politics was just :in ex('.use
for insomniacs who didn't care about
sleep anyway.
"You just moved to New York City
because of the Ethiopian restaurants,".a
woman in high heels and leather fuck-me
skirt told ll)e seriously. "Everybody
knows you steal those soft lengths 'of
bread and take them home for towels."
"Na\\'," Another figure stepped around
tht~'fmt=and began to slip sharp-edged
:r.:;z:,
gun to speak favorabty-'of "open r.elatirrn- scallop shells between the leather sk.irt
ships" and even casual sex. Moreover, she and the other's suddenly nude and tender
has admitted to kinky fantasies and an belly. "She waits 'ti! they dry up all stiff
exhibitionisric streak.
and hard, and then we know what she
I was" dcligh ted. "Next thing you '11 tell uses them for. We know."
me she went out and bought herself a
motorcycle jacket!"
Dreams are a connection too, as is gosArly roared. "No, no! .. , High heels, sip. And gossip itself is terrifying. What
high heels and fuck-me skirts in silk, with arc they saying about us these days? Reslits up the side. She says she's affirming cently I had the strange experience of
gos~ip coming back to me all the way
her basic fcmm c nature."
Juanita played with the wiry curls over' from the west coast-not about someher left car and mock-drawled in her lov- thing I had done, about somethin)/ that I
er's dire~tion, "Sure, and all this time I had only thought oJdoing. I went around
thought she was a secret leather queen."
for days trying to trace the connection.
Who saicj what to who1il, and what had I
"She isn't, but yoti know who is'"
done to betray my in tcrcst 'in her- any"Who?"
way? I couldn't run it down, and it left
Every one giggled.
"Oh, you know her, you know her me with a residue of righ tcous nervouswell. .. " Merle was bouncing on her heels ness. It is one thing, after all, to be called
v.rith excitement. uLucy ! "
on your own outrageous acts, another to
feel the vie tim of someone else's imagina"No way." I caught myscl f. It's very
bad form to tell secrets on ex-lovers, cs- tion, especially in sexual matters. I have
peciall y the ones no one ever really knew tried to cultjvatc a stubborn arrogance to
about.
cover my own fears of such gossip, but I
Merle never even noticed. ushc's mov- know that the only thing that protects
ing to San Francisco, says the women's me (or any of us) from such use is the
community there has more to offer her. lack of ima)/ination m_ost pf us apply to
And you should sec she's taken to wear- such matters. In a culture ih which sexual
ing a garrison belt and a little chain on honesty were the norm, we might be
her boot. She looks nothing short of more at risk. Or we might not Naked in
tough!"
that way, we mibmt sec ~he underlying
"They gonna love her in San Fran."
connections, the ways. in which we all
For a moment I couldn't speak.,
hunger for the same intimacy. Then gosBack when Lucy and I were going sip might come back to what it somehome together after meetings, she always .times is with dose friends: rich, sl1arcd
wore loose cotton clothing ("It's health- joy in our common adventures, not gutier"), woven straw sandlcs ("No animal wrcnching social humiliation tl;at _.conis gonna die to case my fc'ct"), and a trols and terrifies us.
white scallop sh ell on a braided cord
around her nee k (''It was blessed by a real Affirmation of Difference
jun holy woman"). I tried to imagine
her now in a metal-brimmed cap with
went home to. visit iny family in
1
short-cropped hair.
early September and ca,rricd with
''I just can't sec it," I finally admitted.
m_e the Sex Issue of Heresies and
.
"And you ~n't goin~ to,'' Ady
Sapphi>try by PatCalifia. I'd been

Ranch,

curls over her left ear and mockdrawled in her lovers's direction,
''Sure, and all th is time I thought
she was a secret leather Queen."
Everyone giggled.

When one .begins to label "collaborators with evil," one must speak very specifically. When people deny that they are
calling for censorship or attack, but practice just that, questions must be asked.
What exactly is this evil, and what exactly
is to be done with collaborators' Nor can
we afford to forget that, as far as the majority culture of this country is concerned,
we arc all chickens in the same pen and
the hawks arc always waiting to catch
those we throw ou_I_ to them.
.
whenever the vagaries of our lives as feminist activists afford we catch each other
When Amb-cr' Hoilibaugh spoke. the
question~of who gets throv. rn to the
up, tease each other mercilessly, and genhawks became even more important. Her
erally live up to our reputations as trashy,
brief statement was entirely a call for that
troublesome folk. We arc like an old marmost feminist demand: a right to sexual
ried couple transposed to a lesbian-feminpleasure and the right to talk about who
ist non-monogamous reality.
we arc no\v as sexual pcopic.: in this cul- ,
Arly has altered her life- quite thortun:. nut just v..:ho we wish to be after the ! oughly over these last few years, most rerc\olution . . . , think that women hayc
cently becoming something of a radical
been silenced scxuallv." she said. "not
jock. She has stopped drinking, stopped
on iv bv the culture th;t we li\'C in. but bv
:.m oking, and started rising early so she
the:, fa~t that wcve: been denied our righ;s
can get in a thrcc-rniJc run an<l a slow
to our sexual bodic:s as we use them now,
walk home before she goes to work. Such
and that wc GJ.rry the pain ()f that censor
righteous purity ha.s made me a little nerinside us. We arc afraid tiJ tell each other
vous. but fortunately it has not altered
what it Ls that we think about sexually
her m(;q endearing traits: her penchant
because wc:rc d.fraid of what we'll find.
for gossip, go()d company, and cxhibiTh c tcrr()r of l ('ioking inside us is s()
tionistic dancing. When cvcnt~ conspireJ
v:cighty that we rclu':>C t(; engage in that
to put us down in f).C. together not too
discussion bc:causc: wc:'re $(J traumatized
long ago. we spcn t a long evening indulgby what's bc.:c:n done to us in ()Ur rcaJ
ing just those primal pa"iom with a few
lives, not just in the images that arc
other comrn(Jn sould, affording me an oparound us. \l./c'rc forced t<; livr...: out our
portunity to catch up 'on.a community. I
sexuality as incomplete pcuple tu each
now only observe from a distance. The
other and incCJmplctc pc()plc tfJ ourgossip was rich.
"Jean left Carol," I was told, "and Ceselves."
Amber Hullibaugh\ co'!lments seemed
leste finally came out but not with Julie.
to me to bt:- the only ones that addressed
She took off with one of the women 2
the issue uf eras as well as pornography,
from that radical Christian group, broke
that part that so often gets left out of
Julie's heart after she'; been waiting
around all th.;, .time."
these discussions. I find myself thinking
"Oh, crude."
of pornography as a mirror to eros--guite
often a cracked, distorted reRection of
"Goe$ to show you :..hould n<:vcr save
what could be a source of power and fulyourself fcJr a straight wuman."
fillmcn tin our lives. What I do not find iri''G<;c~ to show you shuul<l never ~ave
any of the current feminist treatments of
youncl f."
Arly was drinkiilg club soda while I
prnnr,gr-aphy i.s the gueition of our indisipped Jack Daniels and Juanita and
vidual responses to the stmff. Neither the
Merle shared some smoke and a bottle of
analysis that treats pornot;raphy as a tool
wine. Nancy took turn>. sampling anyof the male ideology nor the faCifo asthing that passed. Everybody had another
sumption that any erotic response to
story to tell. Old lovers have liroken up,
porn is merely a twitch of the "prick in
reshuffled, and then, occasionally, rniracthe head" addresses the complex and terulously, gotten back together. Wwnen
rifying dilemma of the feminist woman
with whom I lrad always pl:,,::;cd to do
whr.1 reads t.:.hc stulf in sccrct wlic; weaves
~~ >i8t.}':' ~v?.Y!

in Hatt
the "'I

Joan

:ill

N
ing tha
tcrcd <
looked
wasn't
graph y
.-ing bu.t
page--:tl
had th:
-with as

wfi

"I'm
it,?'' ,
."No.
''No m.
would I
in her
and sh~
Late
time sh
read th:
like tha

I co\
when I
Worien
a woma
xherc.
''I re
kin's Ji,
paused,
pockets,

woride~

waited,
her che<
stare an
orie els<
how th<
.. 'hp"

"SeV,

got one
it with<
her pani

"OH

cifher
three ir
messed
o~e thi

.and:.~etl

gJi

sick_
about~

Ca

'-'NOt
th~t kiri

inal_:thc

~" c '

:\I

::.n-.-

THE NEW YORK NATIVE/DECEMBER 7-20. 1981

,
l ,..--------.

""-,'.

'-

...
,{
__ j

carrying them around for a while trying

some of my librnry sometime.''
to work myself up to a rev.iew but had.
"Oh. no. l couldn't do th at." She
been finding that both just pushed me to: shook her head, shrank down again. "!
writing other stuff. They kept driving m"__ couldn't."
I left her to go off to a discussion of
back to earlier sex tome>-1'1ie joy ~;f
the special concerns of fe111inist book.Lesbian Sex. and Lovi"g ll'or11e11 by the
Nomadic Sisters. S~ppliistry was an unstores. The session was a revelation. much
like_ the wh olc conference. Relatively few
questioned._ in1provcn1cnt-mon; compregencraliza tions were being offered, and
hensive and truer to mv own sexual cxp~ricnce-but left me 'wondering about the questions were being treated with a
the limits of a mechanistic analvsis. of seriou$hcss and understaniling that would.
sexual technolot,')' without con.c'cxr. of J.iavc really surprised Ille a few years ago.
l)Aorc surprising was th frankness with
what it meant as a frlcntl .pointed out)
that "passion'' is the afterward. nor the ::Yhich some women expressed their own
central concern. Bur S''l'l'l1istry also had . fears and preju dices. They didn't feel
good about it, but they found themselves
me howling with appreciation. The secpracticing ccnsorship--most co111monly de
. rion on the etiyuctte of pcoup sex gave
mt: a whole new perspective on \vhat is . facto ccnsorship-11ot reordering books
and is not po>1i blc between friends. I like Sappl1istry or the Sex .Issue of Here-
sfrs, even if there were requests for thc1n.
:.tarted imagining baroque pairing::. and
"We argued it ,our," someone said.
elaborate semi-public couplinl(s. but the
"We didn't want to refuse to carry a book
idea of the post-ort:y workshop did me i11.
I couldn't get past the idea of all of us sit- some women felt was useful -even if we
personally didn't like it. so we decided to
up n.ikcJ_lQ <..k~iJc on .in agenda.
get it. But then so111chow.it kept falling
K inkv i11dced(
\1y sister pickLd up du: copy of11ere- ' to the end of the list of thli1gs left undone . .Solllehow it never got ordered.''
~iei off d1c Jini.r1i:: rool!l tJblc. ::.hiftc.:J her
Somehow.
bJby to the othcr~arm ..rnd ___gavc it J yuick
I traced, the connl'ction from "don't
then stopped and stared.
want to read about it" to ''l couldn't" to
F:om a...:ro.s;, die rooni ! warclicd nr:rvou.s!y. \Viidt hJd c.1utJ1t her lyc' \Va.sit thr
\\'Ord .\ddU!!ld,{(!Cl1is111 Ufl
31. or the

-~~-:-:;.-'_______

!l<.iLcd .is'.:: J.t die bottom uf thl'. p;.i~t:? \\'<.-1.'>

it thl
pdf'._L'

IJ<lkt:J v. .orncn Wrl'.stkr_., un

prusritutc::.

of

Mu.'it.l!lg

Randi. d1t littll' bitty peanut Jicks .. lint:

in H.irtic Cu::.;,cn'.-, dcliciuu.s .. Yu Daddy."
tlil Eurch.FL1n' .icknowlcdgenicnt of
joJn '.'\cstlc. o~ ti1Jt phoi.llic cactus 111e11J.C-

,,.

i11f'. thJt _syfr rhig_li on pagt 87? I s,rnntcrcd uvn to chc:ck it out whiJc .-,he
looked up and blushed furiously. It
wa_.,nr Pdula \Vcb~ter's artic!c on Porno.
t,'l'dphv and Pleasure" that had her blmhi.ng but the cartoon dt the bottom of the
page-- the one that le ado uff. "I 'veal ways
had this font;1;,y about fucki;~gJ man

with a orr ap-011 dildo .. ~

"Where'd yuu gut thi; , .. ;he demanded.

that has an historical sctti1ygand a cultur- sh"'.'ed my rcvie.w copy with remarke4.
al function .... We were tw 0 women, not
"But do you rdlyhdicvc tha~?Y<\u ;~3:{~
masquerade.rs.'-'
,
. . :
ly believe tpat _a W()lll31l whoge~off on
If we do riotlook directly _at our fears, ty'ing hq lover down and whipgin~er.
can be a femh~ist?"
'

we -cannot sec tl1c complexity nor tl1e

uses of the power. We cannot place our "Well," I asked her in reply~ ''Doyou
selves in our own history. What Joan has. believe that a lesbian who--summers. on
to say about our erotic history seems to Bar Harbor, employs a maid, and occ~
me so true and important that l cannot sionally has her ex-husband over for 'dinunderstand those who find it fearful or ner can be 1.t feminist?"
shameful. I cannot understand why, inMy friend answeri~d ~e,with silence. I
stead of having roses sent . to her had, after all, described a woman we both
door in apptcciation and honor, she
know well who"~oes i;1dced call herself a
has had women question why she has
feminist, and with good reason. But later
written on the subject or fail entirewhat I began to wonder about was why
ly to understand it, still imagining that
my friend phrased her question just that
'allthat stuff is past and gone and
way. Why didn't she wonder about the
better left hiddei1 anyway. lt seems
woman who asks her lover to tic her
absurd ro ha.vc--t.G------ft1Jc<it that, tto, I down ;;ud wl1ip !act? Is that 11m1c uudC1wc did not all come out in 1978 on a . sta r)d';1ble?
None -of this stuff is simple or easy, or
nice, safe college campus; that we arc not
all rniddlc-chtss, safe, squeaky-clean cud- lends itself to facile straigh t-linc political
dly dykes; that we arc not all white, not statements. The Sarnois women Seem -to
all dreaming of 1~oving tr Oregon and have that part clear. With eleven essays,
merging; with the mountain skyline. We
thirteen short stories (almost all pure
arc not all separatists. The comrno11 de- sexual fantasies), a few journal selections,
nominator is that we sleep with women a poem, an intcrvi~w, and a couple of
and that many of us acknowledge the pol- short selections organized around those
itich of what that means, but we don't old ,hanky codes we've all heard about,
they come at. the subject of SIM from a
even agree on the latter.
wide range of viewpoints. Unfortunately,
___ - - --- - they don't all write well or clearly, but
l 'vc never sden that as a total block to
communication. They do all write pas
sio11ately, even if I wouldn't call all the
selections l1ot. "Hot" is, after all, more a
matter of individual fetish and aesthetics.
What pushes one woman's buttons may
totally bore another, and sometimes it is
most valuable to look at the difference.
Why is it that she finds that sexy and I
don't?
One of the surprises of CominJi to
Power is the frank and open discussion of
sexual P~-i'sure,
ou't;ageous sense of
fun in bc'd or park or bar or dungeon.

---~~~:::::;:::..:;::::_

11

~--=::::._;:___

~= -~

1t wasn't Paula Webster's article on

Pornography and Pleasure' that had
her blushing but the cartoon at the
bott.om of the page-the one that
leads off, 'I've always had this fantasy about fucking a man with a
strap-on dildo ... ' "
1

"Somehow it never got ordered." At the

root of it all is a fear that paralyzes. that

I Coming to Power?

-_

an

(The first line of the introduction is "This

is an outrageous book,1' which, no question, it is.) I find this a sharo contrast to

...

From across the room I watched nervously. What had caught her eye' Was it the
word s1.1dvnz~Loclzis111 on page 31. or the
naked ass at the bottom of the page' W<Js
it the parth naked women wrestlers on
pa~c 35. the prostitutes of Mustang
Ranch. the little bitty peanut dicks"" line
in H.ittic.Gossett's delicious "Yo Daddy._"
the Butch-Fem .. acknowledgement of
Joan :\csrle. or that phallic .cactus menacing that_scif.t....!higb__()n_p_age 87_? Lsaun_,
tered over to check it out while she
looked up and blushed furiously. It
wasn't Paula \Vebster"s article on Pornography and Pleasure" that had her blushing but the cartoon at the bottom of the
pa~gc~thc one that leads off. "I've ahvavs
-11ad :his fontas\' about fuc~ki11g= m;n
with d strap-on dildo.
.., \\:'he rc:d.you get
she demanded.
.. I'n: s st.;bscribcr. You want to read

want to read about it" to"] couldn't'' to

---- ---- --------,

even agree on the latter.

U'U.l'fllalll\.y

'lt wasn't Paula Webster's article'On

'Pornography and Pleasure' that had
her blush ing but the cartoon at the
_bottom-of the page-the one that
leads off, l've always had this fan~
tasy about fucking a man with a
strap-on dildo ... ' "

like :hat ...

! cuc_;\dn t
v:hc::J l went

but think of her later

down to D.C. for the

\i/cirncn in Pr~n t conference. and ran into

ct -.:or:1an l k~('.v; \J.g-uely from old tirncs
th ere.
"l :-cad \'OUr review of Andrea Dworkiil 's P(lnzc~r,zraphy. she said., Then she
pushed her hands dov.rn in to the

pockets of her overalis. ""You know. I

wondered .. ."' She hesitated again, and I
waited. watching a siow blush creep up
her checks. She looked up. gave me a flat
stare and then asked me in a rush. "Anyone else you know say any thing about
how those parts that told the porn stories
. how those stories made them feel?''
'"Several people." I told her. "I've even
got one friend who c.ouldn"t get through
it without slipping her fingers d~wn in
her pants .. .''
''OH GOD yes'." Her hands came out
of her pockets and she seemed to gain
three inches in height. "! mean it just
messed me up. You know she's saying
one thing, and there I was hearing that
and getting off at the same time, and just
sick guilty about it: But OH GOD, talk
about hot' Did it do that to you"'
"Not so much. but then when I want
that kind of feeling I read it in the origi-nal-the real stuff You should b9,~row
',

i.. $. -

"Somehow it never got ordered." At the Coming to Power?

root of it all is a fear that paralyzes. that
silences. that locks each of us up inside
define myselLpublicly as a sex
our own sexual nightmarc~-traps us bepervert: I've got friends who take
fore a mirror we don't dare face. For all
. exception with my selfdcfinitiori,
these years we have been about the task
but ca<:h comes at it from a dlfferof making it possible to publicly and
en t direction. One tells me I'm not a sex
proudly be queer. We can be "out" now.
pervert because there is no such thing:
But part of the way we have made that
lesbianism is the moral, sane, responsible
possible has been by denying that there is
choice in a male-dominant imperialist soanything diffcrcn t or fearful about being ciety. Another insists that while, yes,
queer. We have now a moral feminism
th ere are sex perverts, I am not one of
that portrays lesbians as saintly creatures
them: feminists can't be sex perverts, not
who c oncen tra tc on politics and cuddling even non-monogamous sexually agvcn-one step removed from all that tough,
turous lesbians. Then there's the woman
fascinating, dangerous, and terrifying
who denies that I'm a sex pervert because
sexual stuff--but also one step removed
she doesn't think I'm that good: real,
from the power.
juicy sex perverts, she insists, live pcnnanIn her article on butch/fem relationcnrly on the fringe; they consume sex in
ships in the Heresies issue, Joan Nestle
all its raw vitality. "You just playing at
speaks directly to these issues of denial
it," she insists. "Y'ou an 't really made
and imposed normalcy. She describes "her. your bones yet." But then, that one
own reaction to a slide show on lesbian
found the Heresies Sex Issue boring. "Nev"'myths" that insisted that butch/fem les- er got to the good stuff," she insisted.
bians were a copy of heterosexual styles
"And tl1a t Pat Califia--she's just a vanilla
an,l that lesbians no longer do that. "! sat sadist." ,r
They're all going_ to have
great time
feeling that we were so anxious to clean
with the new book'out of Samois, Comup our lives for heterosexual acceptance
ing to Power. The Samois membership d~
that we were ready to force our own people in to a denial of some d.eep parts of fines itself as a group of feminist.lesbians
wh 0 share a positive in tercs t in sa'domasotheir own lives .... I realized the price for
ch ism. They define S/M as a form of erosocial or superficial feminist acceptance
was too high. If we deny the subject of ticism based on a consensual exchange of
power, and in their group statement they
bu rel( and fem relationships, we deny the
emphasize both the consensual, mutual,
women who lived them and still do."
Power, courage, strength, and dclicacy- positive aspects of lesbian S/M and that
such activity can and should be consistent
these are the words that recur all
with the principles of feminism, particuthrough Joan Nestle's article, but what
larly with opposition to all forms of soshe is 'talking about is complexity. "I
cial, hierarchy baied on gender.
realized," she says, looking back on the
'50s from the '80s, " ... there was and still
''\All things are possible," a woman I
is a butch sexuality and a fem sexuality,
not a woman-acting-like-a-man or a wom* 1 wish to credit Frances Doughty as the
origin a tor of th is term, no matter the
an-acting-like-a-womah sexuality but a
developed, Lesbian, specific sexuality
number of people wh,o fiav9 s_ince tped.it.

'I

'(

1'}'

:c-; ~1: n~~ra -a~~t,

pas-

'.\ o. She handed it back. paused.

"''.\o rnan would really let you do that.
would he? .. She had a speculative gleam
:n her e\c, "Oh. I"m sure thev \Vouldn 't. ..
darker and t~rncd a\vav.
LJtCr ! offered it ro.. hcr again. TSat
tir:1c she \'.as finner. "l don't \vant to
\Vant to read anything
:-c:ld that. I

'--U~C;)' WC

they come at., the subject of S/IV1 from a

wide range ofviewpoints. l./nfortunatcly,
they d.on't al,! write well or clearly, but
I've never seen tlfat as a total block: to
commu11i.cation. They do all; write
sionately, even if I wouldn't call all the
selections hot. "Hot" is, after all, morea.
matter of individual fetish and aesthetics.
What pushes one woman's buttons may
to_tally--bore another, and sometilJ?es it is
most valuable to look at the difference.
Why is it that she finds that sexy anq I
don't?
One of the surprises of Comin)i to
Power is the frank and_open discussion of
sexual pM;;isure, ~;; o.:i'fragcous sense of
fun .in l:i#d or park or bar or dungeon.

./

(The first line of the introduction is "This

is an outrageous book,;' which, no question, it is.) I find this a sharp contrast to
other arguments I l1ave heard, particularly
the appeals to the legitimacy of S/M as a
healing process. Now, I can believe tf{at
such role-play, like the kind of thing one
docs in a radical therapy session-yelling
at a pillow or beating on a mattress-is
healing, is a form of therapy and can be
a method by which some women achieve
transcendence. But all that tends to strike
me as one more attempt to be "accepted," another appeal to normalcy by
pleading, "We do it 'causc it's good for
us."
What about: "It's body and I do it
'cause I enjoy it, 'cause I have a right to"?
I go back again to AmberHollibaugh's
call for our right to our sexual bodies as
they are ri)iht now, for what 'is pleasing
and exciting and consensual between us,
for the right to be differenJ and "ask; no
man's pardon" -no woman's, either.
It opens so many questions, this call
for the right to be that different. In the
introduction to Coming to Power, Kath-/
erine Davis suggests, "The logical place to
begin is to talk about our sexuality as it is
.... We must put the rhetorical weaponry aside and willingly engage each other,,
without simply jumping ahead into a new
sexual conformity. We must have precisely the same dialoges about the texture
of our sexuality as we have been having
.about classism, racism, cultural identity;
physical appearance, and ability." Such
dialogues will be necessarily scary; we'll
be face up against that mirr'or, naked,
with all our vulnerability, hungei';'and
common fear showing. We might
have to real! y look at what mJgh t be.. a
"natural eroticism." From that, we mtgh t .
even makt; the connection to otlief'iSsues ,
-those very issues of classism; racism'

then

(~o!ztip,~11d/?,1! ff,'lJ!,, t~ir

THE NEW YORK NATIVE/DECEMBER 7-20; 11181

15

a,.

ll i

~1~}~~~f th~ fi~y

(Continued from page 15)

and

~~~ ~han . the existence

1;1er.judifed against one
~a antagonistic .
each
iue ofdifferences ofrace,
~a, .national llirigm; kncesr physical handicaps. The
:reby finds and declares
:lic.e, ip tolerance, bigotry,
imination and disorder
i thereby threaten the,
proper privileges of its
; and nienace the institufoundations of a free
: state. [24]

to

would simply further the

atic principles of tolerance
sticc by extending the pro: law to one more disfavored
~roup that has, histOi'lcally
ct of a deep and widespread
1 this society,
1g" one group or another is
e point of the city's human
:cs, Those ordinances already
prohibit discrimination on
creed." That does not mean
of New York "condones"

:c creed, no matter how

hat might fall within the
th osc ordinances. It means,
the city recognizes that
l religions and beliefs arc
Jal protection.

1ese

the NYCLU

reasons,

cs the
1017.

City

Council

to

and .cultural identity that blur and dis.appear. under, what I believe, is the same
blanket of fear.
We might everi get around to complexity> For example, reading through Come
ing to Power I kept tracing :an argument
for a 'complex, indigenous theort of sexuality and personal rel.ationships. The
complexity resides partly in .the fact that
Samo.is seems to argue for two apPaiently
opposite approaches: a technical "tricking,"' non-monogamous, "glorification of
the outlaw" image, appr?ach t_o sexuality;
as well as a recognition of the special value of deeply com~ittcd, growth- and
trust-oriented, almost paradigmatically
complementary relationships. The Samois
girls then would appear to be a pretty diverse bunch,
I suspect that part of the resistance
and anger which results from any discus:
sion of feminist sadomasochism is also a
fear of the unknown, different, and
strange-which is markedly different from
the fear of what playing with power relationships might mean. It is hard for many
of us to even imagine playing with power
relationships; after all, so much of our
lives depend on our understanding of
whc'rc we really stand on the power continuum. But there arc other fears 'also.
for example, I can see where S/M might
be placed in the current pursuit of sclfimprovemcnt, as acceptable as compulsive
running, Evelyn Wood speed-reading
courses, and est. r visualize the S/M Academy of Self-Growth and Arcane Political
Manipulation l"How can you ari,>UC with
them? Do you know how they practice
for a debate'"); the self-actualization
through S/M cabal ("I mean, whipping is
really death on cellulite'"); or the S/M
Famuu.<, Writers School 1 ''Takc your medicine, girl. When l'rn through with you,

J., Robinson v. California, 370

0 11962),
.aw of the State of New York,
I.
al Law,S130.0D, which specifi
tfines the term "deviate sexual
1rse

Onofre, 51 N.Y. 2nd 476, 434

2d 947 l19BO).
rhy v. Stahl Manag<'.mcnt, 92
J 1030, 401 N.Y.S.2d 943 (sup,
'. Co. 1977). For another case
~ for the same principle, see

1.

, Liberty flu.tu al Ins. Co. 1 395 F.

098 IN . a, .1975),

Executive Order No. 4, dated

23, 197!l, as amended by Exec.
" 50, dated April 25, 1980.
ow York, & Alfred., N. 'i'., e.g.
1erally "Gay Rinhrs Protections
lnited State and Canada," pub
y the National Gay Tak Force.
1811.
orally "The NGTF Corporate
'published by tho National Gay
>rce (1981 ).
'tit Natille, IHue 24 (Nov. 2-15,
1f p. 8.
rk Times, Nov. 21, 19B1, at B2.
rk Times, July 7; 1978, at 1.
rk Natliie, luue 24 (Nov. 215,
1tp.8,

v Pan<1I: Homo...xuality ," P/ay-

tlfilfl<I, .Allfil Hl71, &t 88,

~m!J41?><iiallty

!JOOl!l,at 119.

yc>u~ll

have no fear <J{ ~ex or p<JWcr or

si's sarcoma and pr:ieu.mocysfr; curinii pneumonia, died November 10.

Krintzrnan, 34, was director of rnarketinq
for the Joffrey BallP.t. His former po~ition~ included the vice p~esidency for rnarketin!J and
audience development at the Brooklyn Academy of Music and t/H~ directorship of development for syndicated prograrnrninfJ at Twentieth
Century-Fox Television.
On r\lovernber 11 Hahbi Charles Lippman
led a crowded mernorial service for Krintnnrm

confrontation, and you' will meet your

deadlines!").
None of that sounds lil<;e .what I seek:
the. reflective, critical; pluralistic feminism that I believe is. possible.
Moreover, in all of this, everyone neglects the subject of love. Passi.on we can
talk abou C.in terms of energy', enthusiasm,
occasionally madness. Sex itself can be
approached as technology, ritual, technitjuP, or social relations. "Relationships"
seem constantly couched in terms of simple dichotomies: presence or absence,
monogamous or non., stable or collapsing.
Then there arc those arduous categories
of commitment: primary, collective, reciprocal, personal; and issue-centered.
Love, meanwhile, is overshadowed by
the onus of romaiice.
I wonder how many other lesbians
found themselves, while reading Shulamith Firestone's chapter on "love" in The
Dialectic of Se.,,,, steadily transposing the

rnan's friends and associate'.> 1n payinq tribute to

the deceased, whose rJenermity and unfailing
characten1~rJ as profoundly
impsnnfJ.

When news of the "l~pldernic of immunosupthe Center for Disease Control in

Atlanta now calls it, first hit the press, Krintzrrnm 1mrnediately becarne enthusiastically involw~d in organizational and fundrnising activitie'... Working cJosely with Lr:irry Kramer, Paul
Rappaport, and Dr. Alvin FrierJman-Kien, he
was pivotally influential in establishing the
Kaposi'!. Sarcoma Research Fund at NYU Medical Cente 1
K(1ntnnan wai al$0 the anonymous ~uhject
of an interview for theNutive {"Canceras Metapre:~sion," and

Prices range
Call 685-8578 fro1

for an appointn

terms "the man, he" to "the lover, she."

It wasn't by chance that she followed the

chapter on "love" with "the culture of
romance, or that I, reading it in what I
consider my early promiscuous period,
latched onto Shulamith's concern with
the confusion of one's sexuality with
one's individuality and set out to rigidly
separate the one from the other.
It is so easy to fall into one camp or
the other-sexual aesthetic or romance
junkie--and thereby lose the insights of
the individual 'capable of passionate love.
But the mistake I made in my reading of
the work was just that attempt to relate it
to my life by the simple transposing of
"he" to "she." It gave a kind of backhanded comfort ("What she mean he-
women J;avc treated me just that bad!")
but was a lie, a contextual, historical lie.
We cannot make generalizations from cXpcricncc outside our own. We must lo9k

(Cor1tinued on paJ!e 33)

gains that have been achieved. On the other
hand, if we act like adults--if the attitude is
that these diseases have hit our community and
we rn1,ist do somethinn about them~-then I
th ink the wonderfu I progress we've made in recfrnt yr~an; will continue to evolve."
In compliance with Kr'1ntzman's final request, please senrJ memorial contributions to
tl1e Kaposi's Sarcoma ResearCh Fund, c/o Dr.
Alvin F riedman-Kien, Fl.oom 272MSC, New
York University Medic?I Center, 550 First Avenue, N1:w York, NY 10016.

Lawrence Mass, M.D.

81 the Frank Carnp!Jell F-t:meral Chapel. In a

moving eulO!JY, he foil owed a s1rearn of ~rinv

qood hu1nor WfHe

The original cartoons off

that have appeared ii
are now availat
by app<

Ashkinazy Wins $125,000

in "Cruising" Suit
Steve Ashkina.r.y, a !JOY activist and businessman, has been awarded $125,000 in damages
by a federal jury in Manhattan for bea.tings, tor
ture, false arrest and irnpriso~nment he suffered
at thH hands of a New York City Police Depar~
rnen1 tactical patrol force when he'was acting as
a marshal during demonstrations against the
film Cruising in August 1979.
Ashkina2y, an owner of the New Ballroom
and a member of Manhattan Community Board
2, was represented in his suit by the New Yrirk
Civil Liberties Union.

CONGRAl
THE NEW
I
ASSEMBL YMAI
ASSISTANT M

oromer, wresumg .with hls .own desires

and convictions; Mandy Patinkin) Titeh
is. eloquent, his rise and': humanity
beautifully played.
The design pf the film is important to
its success-and Forman's eye for detail
continues to see just what's necessary,
evocative, right. A line of showgirls
onstage in the Mamzelle Champagnf}
number blurs to a flash-ing canvas of pink
and green; through the rectangular opening in the Morgan Library's massive door,
white eyes in a .black face .peer out as
from a gilded RusSian icon, coated with
grief and r'!>~f-Ragtinie is a dance from
our childhood, and in its steps are all the
ferment and power of that early decade,
in this country, this city-we may even
recognize our present face in the light
of its glittering and awful reflection.
Harold Rollins as Coalhouse Walker in Ragtime.

by Michael Grumley
here's a certain early twentiethcentury light that sometimes
falls on Manhattan. It's the
light of a time of hope, appropri2te to aspiration clean and transparcnt
as the sea used to be. To catch it on film
1

d that's
do, and
ni<Th[,-,
cape to

you're

1d:;."f a

' thuds,a.s my

arnaoe
.~

;cu:s
TlL'\.T
(,,,'(,

(inUfJP-c'

AlliSOilrcontinued from 29)

first at what is unique, diff~rent, and
frightening about ourselves ... particularly as sexual outlaws-lesbians and gay
men-and build from that an understanding of what really goes on and what it is
possible to change.

he most powerful book I've

read this year has been This
Bridge Called My Back-powerful not only in that it is a landmark event in the development of feminist theory-a direct call for the revitalization, the grounding of a grass-roots, indigenous feminist theory-but personally
powerful, in that it advocates truth, risk,
and sharing across class, ethnic, and racial
lines. It sent me back to the short stories
I hadn't been able to work on in months,
validated my impatience with a move'
ment in which lately I have felt no motion, and literally demanded that I get my
ass in gear and get back to work. And
through it all, from Cherrie Moraga's "La
Guera" to Chrystos's throat-closing
poems, from Hattie Gossett's "Billie Lives!
Billit<Tives!"'oie Mirtha Quintanales's "I

is remarkable, .and Milos Forman has

caught it in the movie Ragtime.
In the scenario, there are notes of
aspiration and cymc1sm, filigrees of
wealth and sensuality, innocence trodden
down, power exerting its sooty might.
The light of 1906 falls on characters
bounding 'toward their extremes, a

curious familiarity pervades

Crimes of the Heart, now_playing at the Golden Theater. This
is a definite plus, because so
much" of the plain grotesque gets resolved
in a way that is quite harmonious, sounding a vote for the optimistic in life.
Quirky and personal, this play gives flesh

Com'e with No Illusions," from Audre

flirting, and a frank pursuit of physical
Lorde's challenging "The Master's Tools gratification (something very common to
Will Never Dismantle the Master's House"
many ethnic minorities in this society,
to Gloria Anzaladua's "La Prieta"; I as well as to what are maliciously referred
found not only a toleration of difference to as "the lower classes") find ourselves
but an advocacy, a celebration, a simple, shut behind yet another silent wall-a rigpowerful recognition that difference is, as id denial of what Mirtha Quintanalas has
Audre Larde puts it, "that raw and pow- called a feeling of being always hungry.
erful connection from which our personal Sometimes, when I'm trying t;, hold mypower is forged." This celebration of dif- self back from touching, stroking, or
ference touches me in my most fearful
("Oh, forgive me") patting the ass of
place: the conviction that I am not good these ethereal, intellectual, don't-fuck-noenough, cannot be good enough am some- how feminists, I find myself with a real
how flawed in my nature. And that is a and agonizing pain in the ass that is half
product, in part, of growing up in this cramped muscles and half moral rage.
culture-female, lesbian, and workingEven assuming that no one is getting
class-innately outlaw.
enough, most of us do get to bed now
All too often, when we talk about this and again. Most of us engage in erotic
-our political concept of ourselves-we
gratification some portion of every dayput sex in a separate place. We talk good
in fantasy if not in fact. No.w, since this
politics around lesbianism and gay civil
real needy stuff is going on, why isn't
rights and nasty gossip about the real deit more of an integrated, acknowledged
tails of who's a romance junkie, who has
part of our politics?,Why do we waste our
a reputation for being boring in bed,
time arguing side issues like dress ("We
who's kinky, who's promiscuous, who
don't allow that leather stuff in here") or
"leaves her politics outside the bedroom
talk ("Does everything remind you of a
door." Women who share with me the ex- dirty joke?") or style ("Talk about
petieflce of growing up in a specific cul-. , butch l ") when substance is being neglecttural enclave that encouraged touching, 1 'ed? As tired as I get of prissy, happy end-

.. ...
A

~ th. c Gugge~.heim Museum. , the

current "Art of the AvantGarde in Russia'~ is an exhibition rich in nuance; we look at'
the canvases and drawings from the early
1900s a~ at topographical. maps of the
constructivist spirit; The reds and blacks
of Liubov Pop ova lead on .to cubism and
seem powerful, full of tensile strength.
The black and white a:nd gray lithographs
of El Lissitsky are in their constraint all
the more effective, and seem to be the
most enduring of all the work on display;
Viewing these pieces from the George
Costakis collection, slowly ingested by
the great white worm that is the Guggenheim, one feels the inove'ment of that age,
and its own single-minded optimism. The
vocabulary of Jine and geometric clarity
is like a visual Esperanto, formed for tlie
new age, conceived in hope and ideology.
That it is, these 'ciecades later, a language
that no one speaks in the mother land, is
ironic and certainly lamentable. Sobering
to see the creative expression r.ise up, and
then evaporate. The cycles of life seem
more with us than ever these days, and
the repetition of history's themes a theme
in itself.

ings in lesbian fiction, I am even more

frustrated by the pretense that lesbianism
is a sufficient remedy for anything. I've
been prowling this territory a long time,
from pre-feminist guilt-and-misery days
to current utopian femfnist enlightenment, and I've got a stack- of question
cards that no one seems to want to ad:
dress in any con.text-not just questions
of sexual connection but questions about
relationships, power, and interaction that
borders on the unclean: racist f~ars, elitist
assumptions, and "process" that mandates manipulatiott; What has excited me
in the last year has been the sense that we
might indeed have the makings of a ,new
m.aturity in our own community.:..the
ability to admit scary jringe desires and
needs without a kncx(:jer k response. But
first we've got to start talking out of our
real experjence. All these boo~ are just
signposts on the road; we an 't even hit
the major highway yet.

RESERVE SPACE NOW

for your Christmas Advertising}'*,
Gall Tom Duane (212)92<]'-'.73~5.
~'>'IT;,:1

1'>f/'1 1,1J

'(!f1~,,1 t6.J)j~Jfyi;_

THl'2:-4Ev\l'.Yblii(J.M.jf,.'lf.!V'e/o'EbEMBEFl''>~f!liJ1HT ~s

.1'"