Al girls are sluts

its foolish self-deception to believe a woman telling you normally, I dont do that [fucking a
guy so quickly] or I never did that before.

Agreed. Thats why I dont listen to what women say. Thats like, Game 101. Every chick thinks
shes an innocent angel and writes off all the times that dont count like sex outside her race,
vacation sex, drunk sex she regrets, etc. Just like an interrogation pro can generally tell when
someones full of shit and what makes them tick because hes dealt with so many people trying
to bullshit him and his job is to get to the truth, a PUA can generally tell when a woman is full of
shit and what makes her tick because hes dealt with so many of them (not just sexually, but in
general interactions/conversations with thousands of different ones since thats what we
purposely go out and do on a regular basis (sarging)).

Heres why all girls are sluts, broken down in-depth:

Attraction is a primal emotion/instinct/reaction, like anger. If you figure out what a persons
boundary is, you can make them angry. Some people are easy to make angry, some people are
more difficult, but everyone has a threshold where their instincts kick in and theyll get angry
and fight.

Ergo, all girls have the potential to be attracted, you just have to find their threshold. Some girls
thresholds are lower than others, but just as Ghandi and monks who spend their lives learning to
repress those emotions are basically the only ones you cant eventually piss off with the right
stimuli, pretty much any womens attraction can be triggered since Ghandi is the outlier and
those guys swinging fists outside the bar and getting angry on Internet forums is the norm.

PUA teaches guys to specifically dig down to the girls attraction blueprint and extract it in a
smooth way (this is where the non-judgement Secret Society stuff comes in) VS most guys who
stumble around clueless and occasionally trigger it, or natural players who are good at
instinctively triggering it but are the equivalent of a friend who listens VS a trained
psychologist (theyre good, but not targeted/trained like a sniper). To go back to the anger
example, a PUA is like the bully or comedian who can sum a person up quickly and just
KNOWS exactly what button to push on someone to zing them and piss them off, while other
people just spray-n-pray insults like Youre an ectodweeb! desperately hoping something hits.

So lets Occams razor this. Which is more likely?:

1) That women are all just running on emotional instinct with various thresholds that can
basically all be triggered, some more difficult than others but since even the good girl ends up
getting married even SHE has an attraction threshold.
2) Or that theres a super secret subset of women who (despite that we all know from the
Manosphere women are completely encouraged and rewarded NOT to self-analyze or train
themselves to control their emotions in any way) have defied all odds and natural programming
and have trained themselves to be impossible to attract in under a specific amount of hours and
in specific conditions because they are MADE OF MAGIC lol And that this subset of women is
statistically huge enough to be in any way more relevant than using Ghandi as an example of
how peaceful people are.

So why do red pill guys still cling to number 2?

I suspect theres an overlap between people who can convince themselves theres a God to avoid
the reality that bad things happen for no reason, and people who can convince themselves that
not all women are like that to avoid the reality that girls and humans in general (including us here
in this comment section) arent unique and special snowflakes.

The reality is that some of you are still clinging to the hope that not all women are like that
because its scary to think that 1) your wife, mom, etc. is/was exactly like that, 2) you will have
to accept the terrifying notion that if you want to settle down, your girl will have the same slut-
potential (but with a lower, but not un-reachable threshold) than the drunk mini-skirt chick
dancing on the bar and you can never fully trust that she wont stray on you unless you lock her
in the basement and keep her from any human contact, and 3) you may die alone because the
goal youve created in your head as a requirement for you to marry and settle down doesnt exist,
the same way youd die alone if you made a vow not to marry a woman until youve videotaped
yourself high-fiving God.

Whats controlling these fears (which are what lead to this desperate view), is the
madonna/whore complex rooted way down in its deepest form to where you can even ADMIT
that some girls are definitely sluts but it has to be followed by but not ALL of them. to
appease your fears and to allow you to keep searching for your non-existent treasurebecause if
you admitted to yourself that that treasure doesnt exist, the future youve imagined for yourself
would be shaken and it would all be too bleak to accept.

This is the same illusion-shattering concept as when you realize your CEO job wont get you the
pussy society built the illusion in your head that youd get, your best friend did something
unforgivable to you because theyre human and not perfect like the illusion you built up for
them, and when women realize theyve hit the wall and wasted their high-SMV years without
securing a future because feminism built the illusion in their heads that there would be men a-
plenty at 30+. Your world goes from black and white to shades of grey and youre forced to
contemplate if everything I was so sure about was wrong, what else am I wrong about? and
youre entire core, identity, life, purpose, goals, etc. are rocked.
Its at this tipping point that a person goes down two paths:

1) Depression. You become jaded, cynical, sad, miserable, and feel defeated. Life feels pointless
and hopeless as your brain comes to terms with the new realizations that just butt-fucked
everything you held close to your core about how the world works. You become bitter, angry at
the world, frustrated by the unfairness, and probably end up a MGTOW (to be fair, you can
become a MGTOW in a healthy positive way too, I dont think theyre all bitter losers despite
their shitty Public Relations lol). This can also be the catalyst for removing yourself from the
game entire (certain types of MGTOWs, the grass eaters movement in Japan, etc. The only
difference with these groups is that theres more of a head-in-the-sand fuck it then, Im outta
here, good luck with all that shit yall mentality, which, technically speaking is actually a little
healthier than reveling in the depression from a day-to-day happiness standpoint lol)

2) Acceptance. You accept the pain and shell-shock of whats happening as a natural thing and
eventually overcome it. You find new ways to appreciate the world around you despite its faults
and you learn to accept reality for what it really is: flawed and imperfect but often filled with
good things if you look for them. You realize that people are the same, we all have potential for
good and bad, and that all of that is simply societal judgement attempting to solidify shades of
grey into black and white for easier processing and teaching to new generations and to keep
society stable.

A person can go through a period of Depression and end up in Acceptance, but its a difficult
climb. How much of your identiy, reality, beliefs, hopes, future projections, etc. you based on
your beliefs is a big part of what determines which path you go down. When I swallowed the red
pill, I had no problem traveling the Acceptance path because I had so little experience with
women that I had no part of my world based on them except the occasional day-dream about the
white-picket fence life. Most of the middle-of-the-road madonna/whore complex guys tend to
have much more wrapped up in their beliefs on how women are or should be, so they can go
either way. The stereotypical angry bitter MRA types have usually been so burned by women
that their whole identity/life/etc. was shattered by the red-pill which is why they tend to end up
on the Depression/MGTOW path.

This has been your daily dose of how we all work, by YaReally. I dont expect this to sway any
of the haters in this thread obviously lol this is more for the lurkers reading who may one day hit
this tipping point as they read the Manosphere, PUA stuff, and meet a lot of women because
ideally Id like them to have as much information ahead of time as possible to make it easier to
transition onto the Acceptance path rather than the Depression path.
Introverts

I know you say introspective but just a quick note on the closely related topic of introverts
first:

I find a lot of introverts are just guys hiding behind a socially acceptable label and use that
label as an excuse to avoid leaving their comfort zone, usually because theyre either scared to
let loose more or they simply dont understand how to. People who meet me now assume Im an
extrovert, but I used to consider myself an introvert before I got into game. Whats closer to
reality is that we all have extro/intro sides to us and game is just about learning to embrace and
express the extro side in certain environments/situations.

I believe there are VERY few self-identifying introverts who CANT be more extroverted
given the proper tools/guidance and motivation. Like Ive said before, if you push yourself
outside your comfort zone and go out for a year straight, opening 10 sets a night, getting laid
here and there, making new friends, etc, and after all that you decide you still prefer to be alone
with a good book or whatever, then youre probably naturally an introvert. If you havent pushed
those boundaries and youve declared yourself an introvert without having tested your extrovert
side, you are just hiding behind a label and making excuses for not taking action.

Anyway, for the introspective-but-not-socially-crippled guys youre describing, they have to

remember that game essentially comes down to expressing yourself and your personality to the
girl.
An outgoing party guy can do that in a chaotic nightclub because hes naturally the center of
attention and girls can see his congruent personality from across the room while he causes a
scene.

An introspective guy is going to fade into the background in that same environment because
while he may be super intellectual and be able to build a deep emotional connection with a girl,
he has to first get her attention to be in a position to demonstrate those attributes. Thats why a
lot of these guys, if they go out alone, end up pretending theyre James Bond and lean against the
bar all night, then go home alone having not talked to anyonethey might BE awesome but they
didnt get a chance to demonstrate that to anyone in that environment.

So whats the solution for them?

1) Learn to be more outgoing, to loosen up, and to let their extroverted side out in the club. A
LOT of guys are only introverted in the club because theyre scared to embarrass themselves
or let go and are terrified of social judgement and tell themselves thats not me when theyre
really just chickenshit.

I know this because Im actually closer to the introspective guy you describe than I am to the
outgoing Jersey Shore Stiffler party machine. And some of my social circles are full of high-
energy crazy outgoing party guys who make me invisible beside them. So Ive just learned to let
my outgoing side out in these environments because I love the girls there and I know I need a
window of opportunity to demonstrate my other awesome qualities and I wont get that window
if I cant be outgoing in the club environment.

That doesnt mean I become a dancing monkey and try to act like my friends, it means that when
my friends are causing a scene dancing, I know my game is primarily verbal so Ill make sure to
approach a girl or grab one of the girls weve met and say something she cant ignore and start
sucking her into my personality. So when my friends dance, I may approach a set of girls
watching them and say hey quit staring at my friends asses, ya fuckin perverts., forcing myself
onto their radar, then isolate one with youre fun, whats your name? and turn her away from
our friends and start leading her energy down to a lower key and build rapport/comfort and
display my verbal awesomenessthus creating my window in a high-energy club environment
without being a full out Stiffler.

Tyler from RSD has a bunch of videos on the steps he forces himself to take when hes out to get
out of his introspective inside-my-head mode and into a partying mode. Hit up his stuff on
YouTube and try it out for like 6 months and see what gels for you.

So the idea here isnt that youre changing yourself, its that youre working toward embracing
and enhancing a side of yourself that you may not be used to displaying except when youre
around close friends (like theres no social judgement worries when youre with your best friends
shouting and laughing over an Xbox game togetherif you can do that, guess what, you have an
extroverted side, you just dont know how or are scared to tap into it in public with strangers).

The main idea is that you learn to get her attention so you can then demonstrate all your cool shit
that she would never have seen because you were blending into the background.

Or 2) Change your environment to one thats more conducive to displaying your quiet
introspective personality. ie do Daygame instead of nightclub game. Go to happy hour at a chill
lounge instead of a chaotic nightclub full of loud music and energy and distractions and
cockblocks etc. Game at the mall and in bookstores and coffee shops and all that.

And/or focus on social circle game, where youre given an introduction and the girl is forced to
be around you long enough to see you express yourself in your introspective way. Like at a club
if youre solo, youll blend into the background and go home alonebut if you have a group of
5-10 friends there, and some of them are extroverted and/or female, well hey, now youre
probably going to meet a few new girls a night just thru your friends, and those girls are going to
be sitting at your table, or at your pre-drinking gathering, or coming to an after-party, or even just
forced to spend a few minutes talking to you while your mutual friend goes to the bathroom.

So in this method, youre putting yourself in situations that make it easier (or take the
responsibility out of your hands entirely) to get that window of opportunity to display your
personality.

The 2nd way is a lot easier a route, but it means youre more limited in that your selection of
girls are what the Universe throws at you. If youre a guy who likes dolled up girls in
minidresses, youre probably not going to find those in the bookstore or be introduced to them by
your nerdy Xbox buddy, so route 1 is something to look at exploring, or playing up the social
circle angle at clubs with route 2. If youre a guy who hates that type of girl and is into the
quieter girl-next-door types, hitting bookstores etc with route 2 might be better for you.

Essentially you have to know what you want in terms of the type of girls you want, and you have
to then figure out how do I create or end up in a situation where I have an opportunity to display
my personality to those types of girls?

One of the oldschool PUAs had a fetish for Japanese flight attendants. Did he go to normal North
American bars hoping to just randomly run into one? No, he specifically flew on Japanese flights
and hung out in airport lounges and worked his way into the industry social circles etc to put
himself in situations where hed have opportunities to meet that type of girl and demonstrate his
personality.
Hope that helps. Are you honestly getting the kind of girls you truly want? If not, its time to start
looking at what do I want and how do I get that window?

Congruency

your formulation for congruency seems so rigid that it would leave no room unpredictability,
mysteriousness, change-up game, and the like.

Congruency is a large concept. Think of it as a huge shell that covers everything. Long as what
youre doing falls within that shell, it goes over well. But while your actions are well-defined,
that shell is kind of abstract. Confusing hey?

My shell is I dont care what people think. So when I wear a fuzzy hat or a pink shirt or an
Armani suit to a dive bar, Im signaling that. But if someone teases me about my outfit or I get
socially pressured to change it, my next action determines whether Im congruent. If I laugh it
off and continue to fully believe what Im wearing is awesome, Im congruent to that shell. If I
get self-conscious and my state drops or I run home to change my clothes, Im not congruent to
that shell. This is why peacocking can spike a ton of attraction if youre congruent to it, but it can
destroy you if youre not.

Shell: Chick drama is silly, I dont like drama in my life.

Stimulus: Chick gives you drama
Congruent: Ignoring it or scolding her for bringing it up.
Incongruent: Getting invested in it.

Shell: Looks dont matter.

Stimulus: You see a hot girl while youre not dressed well and your hair is messy and your BMI
isnt the perfect %
Congruent: Approach her as confident as if you were in a suit.
Incongruent: Make excuses not to approach, and go hit the gym telling yourself next time!!!.

Shell: I am enough. Im a high value male, Im the prize, and any woman would be lucky to get
a chance to be with me.
Stimulus: Talking to a girl.
Congruent: Talking about whatever you want or what interests you or making jokes that make
you laugh even if you know she probably wont think its funny. Being willing to lose the set for
the sake of self-amusement.
Incongruent: Trying to think of something to say that shell be interested in, referencing Glee
characters, being scared that shell walk away at any second.

Shell: I dont attach my self-worth to my masculinity or compare myself to other alpha males to
determine how high value I am.
Stimulus: Youre Russell Brand.
Congruent: Camping it up and embracing your silly feminine tendencies and wearing crazy
outfits.
Incongruent: Toning it all down and trying to act like James Bond or get jacked up to try to
have football player muscles.

So congruency is a combination of beliefs and actions. The shells are basically your own
personal values, beliefs, morals, experiences, etc. But theyre different for everyone. Your shell
might be fucking a married girl is wrong where mine might be fucking a married girl is
okay. Your shell might be cheating on my partner is okay where mine might be cheating on
my partner is dishonest, Id rather set up an open relationship from the start.

This is why everyone loves characters like Stiffler or Finch from American Pie or Barney Stinson
from How I Met Your Mother. Sure their beliefs arent most peoples, in fact they may directly
oppose them, but the character is 100% congruent to them so we respect that and girls are
attracted to it.

The catch in all of this is that most guys arent self-aware enough or havent challenged
themselves enough to know what their own shells are. Most guys are wishy-washy and
indecisive and dont know what behaviors they do/dont accept from themselves and from other
people. They just ping pong along through life bouncing off stimulus and going with the flow.
They have no strong core identity to be congruent to.

This is why a guy with street smarts is often more attractive than a guy with book smarts. The
guy with street smarts knows himself and has developed his own code of shells.

Youll find most naturals have really solid shells theyre congruent to. They can even be totally
misguided gym tan laundry is what gets the girls!!! but theyre so congruent to them that they
get attraction.

Of course my comment right above this talks about not trapping yourself in a rigid identity, so
how do you reconcile the two seeminly opposing concepts?

Well a shell is something so over-encompassing that its a belief or value that sticks with you
despite tweaking your identity. So my shell might start out as I dont care what anyone
thinks but as I put myself in more situations and gain more reference experiences and test
myself more I may learn more about myself and that shell may become I only care what
people I respect think which, whether youre dressed in a fuzzy hat or a polo shirt or whether
youre an asshole or a nice guy, that shell holds.

This is why when I run into guys who have limited beliefs I tell them not just to go out more but
to meet a bigger variety of people and put themselves in a bigger variety of situations outside
their comfort zone. If youre an Armani suit guy and you only hang out in the Armani crowd at
Armani bars, youll solidify your identity as an Armani guy and take up the beliefs of that crowd.
Whereas if you make sure to drop into sketchy dive bars and learn to interact with the complete
opposite crowd, NOW you can look at what are the commonalities that hold up between these
two crowds. The more experience the better.

I think this is a big part of why movie stars go visit Ethiopia and shit. To escape the Hollywood
bubble thats defined their values and beliefs most of their lives.

Hope this helps. Happy reading lol

Field vs Theory
I actually dont care if someone goes out as long as what theyre saying aligns with what guys
who go out regularly have experienced.

ie I imagine Roissy and Rollo dont go out trying to pick up poon these days, I know Rollo is
married and all that. But the things they describe/teach other men on their blogs like 95% line up
with the combined experiences of tens of thousands of PUAs. So I like their blogs and appreciate
what theyre doing for men. And when occasionally they hit that other 5% its usually not due to
ignorant beliefs but just misunderstanding something or not being aware of some nuances that
are explained in PUA literature and thats where I like to clear things up or elaborate on them in
the comments.

Then you have certain commenters who are obsessed with espousing their own limited world
view as if it was the truth. Theyve been around the sphere for a while, they have a following of
Jockeys who are more beta than them, they have a reputation and an ego, and they speak very
authoritatively and are used to the poor betas reading sphere blogs and not going out listening to
them. These guys dont go out regularly, they just spout their theories that are tainted and twisted
around their limiting beliefs.

How do I know those guys dont go out regularly? Because if they did they would end up
coming to the same conclusions the guys who go out regularly do. Its that simple. If you still
think money matters, you havent gone out enough and pushed yourself enough (be poor for a
while and pick up, pick up while telling girls you work at McDonalds, go out dressed like a slob
and pick up, etc) and you havent met enough people (make friends with people in poor social
circles and hang with the alphas in those groups) because if you did all that youd come to the
same conclusion the thousands of PUAs who HAVE done all that have come to.

If everyone else says the sky is blue and youve been living in a cave all your life and are
running around demanding everyone accept your belief that the sky is green, thats the indication
you dont leave your cave. Because if you left your cave youd see, like everyone else outside,
that the sky is blue.

It really is this simple, and I think its a shame that there are comment readers in the manosphere
legitimately looking for help to improve their lives and theyre forced to risk getting sidetracked
by authoritative Keyboard Jockey commenters. You are wasting their time and actually ruining
other mens life and keeping them from reaching their potential. That is sad and annoying to me
because the rest of society already filled these guys with bullshit beliefs to hold them back, the
manosphere isnt a place where that should keep happening.

To paraphrase Tyler: PUAs encourage going out because we know the field fixes you. If you
dress like shit the bouncer wont let you in so youre forced to look at the scene and learn a bit
about fashion and social awareness. If you stutter, girls walk away, and you learn to start snuffing
out the stuttering and sound more confident. If youre quiet, girls will walk away when they cant
hear you over the music so you learn to make your voice carry. When youre too shy to touch a
girl she loses interest so you learn to kino properly. When you fuck a chick and youre out of
breath in 30 seconds because youre a fat fuck you learn to work out and be healthier so you can
enjoy sex more.

And down the road when you have some relationships, if you havent internalized alpha traits
and become alpha youll lose girlfriends because theyll see the incongruence/faking so you
learn to internalize traits. Youll lose girlfriends because youll play too many games and learn
that there are points where you can tone down all the game playing. Youll lose girlfriends
because you looked at them as sex objects instead of people and learn to build comfort and get to
know and love them as human beings. Youll lose social circles because you shat where you eat
and had no self control and fucked a buddys girlfriend and youll learn to control your impulses
and create your own set of rules you live by. Youll lose buddies because you got into fights over
girls and youll learn to chill out and not look at guys as competion especially your friends.
Youll realize you have a bunch of shallow relationships because the guys only know you as a
bar buddy and not a real friend and youll learn to make an effort to see them outside of the
bars and develop real friendships.

So ya, we encourage guys, ESPECIALLY newbies, but old-timers as well, to go out regularly.
The field is merciless and will shove all your shortcomings in your face over and over until you
fix them.

And when you fix them? You end up agreeing with the stuff thousands of PUAs have been
saying. When you havent fixed them and dont go out so your sticking points and limiting
beliefs arent shoved in your face to see? Well, you become a vet on these comment sections
espousing bullshit advice to newbies who dont have the experience to know better yet. Hows
that for charm lol
Identity, Boundaries and shit tests

My posts still havent shown up yet (sigh), so check the last couple articles in a day or two for a
shitload of knowledge bombs being dropped in your face lol. Anyway, now on to this one, which
will probably make more sense after you read the one that hasnt shown up yetif this one
shows up, fuck it, who knows what youll get to read and when! lol

Im noticing more and more that state control is probably my biggest problem.

Thatll stick around for a while. I recommend working on one or two things at a time, and state
control is a pretty big one to tackle and the easiest time TO tackle it is when you have a solid
foundation going. ie if being internally validated involves having a delusional sense of
coolness and fully believing youre awesome, its a lot easier to do that when youve picked a
few girls up or really nailed your body language down or achieved your workout goals etc. and
have something you can logically base that on. This all depends on the type of learning method
you resonate with and how hardcase a newbie you are and what your goals are, etc.

Viewing it like you view maximizing poker hands means youre probably a pretty
rational/analytical guy and youll probably do well with the analytical/strategic approach to this
(VS the drill sergeant style Man up and get in there you pussy!! stuff thats popular in the
community these days). It honestly might not be the fastest route for getting quick results, but a
slower learning strategy that you feel comfortable and in control with is a lot better than a faster
learning strategy that feels like youre just riding a roller-coaster hoping something useful sticks
in your brain.

I kinda realize that this friend of ours, in the way she acts toward me, doesnt respect me as a
man.

Welcome to seeing The Matrix around you. Youre going to notice a lot of stuff like this where
youre like wow, how did I not notice this before? Its so obvious now!! I see a lot of stuff in
peoples personalities/actions that my normal non-gamer friends are completely oblivious to, and
its like a flashing neon sign to me. It can give you a minor feeling of omnipotence at times,
which feels pretty goodlike when you know you have the nuts in poker and that the other guy
has no idea he cant possibly have the hand hes trying to bluff lol
But almost every damned time I make a successful joke or get the attention of everyone in a
positive way, frenemy is sure to talk shit. Like, without fail.

Okay so heres an unfortunate reality that trying to learn game will shove in your face: The
people around you (even your BEST friends and family) dont necessarily want you to become
better (or more accurately they dont want you to change). There are a few reasons for it and
theyre not necessarily malicious, theyre just like, human nature basically:

1) Crabs in a bucket syndrome, where if you have a bunch of crabs in a bucket and one starts
crawling out, the others will pull him back down so theyre all stuck there together. This is like
when one guy in a group of burnout pot-head buddies cuts out the pot so he can go to law school,
and his buddies are all youve changed man, why are you selling out like this, you used to be
cool.

Part of the reason people do this is that youre fucking with their life (ie someone they
relied/counted on to play a certain role in their life is leaving that role and they feel a lack of
control because of it which is scary), part of it is jealousy (ie how come HE gets to succeed,
hes supposed to be our group loser, or hes supposed to be like me and Im not going to succeed
so its not fair that he gets to succeed and I dont and since Im not going to put in the effort to
come up to his level, I need to bring him back down to my level), part of it is that you working
on yourself and getting success forces them to look at their own lack of success (ie two fat
friends, one works out constantly and gets in shape and the other one actively resents them for it
because seeing them working out is a reminder that they dont have the motivation/discipline to
work out and change themselves too, so the in-shape guys success rubs the fat guys failure in
their face), and part of it is that people dont like having to re-label something (ie youre the
shy quiet nerdy one, that they can count on to be shy quiet and nerdythen you start being out-
going loud and dressing cool. Well we cant have THAT, or Ill have to re-evaluate who you are
as a person and re-label you, and Ive already handled labelling you 10 years ago when we met
and Im used to that label, I dont want to have to look at you different, I have other shit to do
and that takes mental effortthis isnt YOU man, what are you doing? thats not YOU dude,
why are you being weird? Why are you wearing that? Thats not YOU.).

You may have noticed a running theme herethose reasons are all selfish as FUCK, and dont
involve having your best interests (the betterment of your life in general) at heart. Along the way
youll actually learn who your legit REAL friends are, because those are the friends who are
going to be going awesome work buddy, glad youre coming out of your shell now! and that
new outfit looks great, youll lookin stylin these days! and hey man Im passing by the gym,
do you need a ride? etc.

The sad part is that often youll find that your legit friends are a lot fewer than you thought
often itll only be like 1-5 people in your social circle that really support you as you work on
yourself. Youll run into a lot of situations where youre like wow, I really thought this person
was my friend but theyre trying to keep me down And, even more sad, you may have to
cut some of these people out of your life, either for a while (till youve solidified your new
Identity enough that they finally accept it), or forever if theyre really detrimental to your mental
stateor at least keep them at arms length and avoid hanging out with them unless you have to.

The good news is that down the road you wont regret cutting any of them out of your life
because youll be fully aware of how poisonous they really were and youll feel more bad for
them than for you, because youll think man, I really wish this person had been more supportive
instead of being such a negative person, I really valued their friendship and theyre really
missing out by not getting to be a part of my life.

The other good news is that ultimately the strongest frame wins. If you take on a new Identity,
and you solidify that identity over time with all your reference experiences, and you really
become that new Identity and all your behaviors, thoughts, actions, etc. align with it congruently,
for a long enough period of time, a lot of those people who had trouble with you changing will
come to accept the new you and end up back in your life but this time accepting you for who
youve become instead of trying to get you to stay in the label they had you in. Its like your
reality wins over theirs so they just cave and accept it, which is something common in pickup in
general.

And then, I notice that the stuff shes saying sort of mirrors the one-off critiques I got the other
night

The rejection of your changing can manifest itself in pretty cruel ways depending on the type of
person youre dealing with. Some people will just be like dude, thats not you man, are you
okay? Why are you acting like this now? Youve changed man and some will be hostile
dickheads like this chick.

it always boils down to something like youre gay your outfit sucks,

As youve noticed, this is the same type of shit you were getting from the girls in your last Field
Report. Girls arent super clever, especially when they think the guys frame is
incongruent/weak. Like you wouldnt bother taking a huge wind-up swing to punch through a
thin piece of balsa wood because youd figure you can just break it with a couple fingers
squeezing it.

When I get shit-tested these days, I get shit-tested HARDgirls try to bring out their A-Game
with testing me because they know stuff like your outfit is gay wont phase me at all. They
know if theyre going to test me, they need to do it with something brutal to have a shot at
shaking my frame. Their shit still usually isnt funny though lol
And again, theyre just doing this because youre acting different than how they think you
should act, and they sense they can get away with it, like a cheetah tackling the injured gazelle
of the group, its almost instinct to pounce on a weakness.

Tyler puts it good in a video where he says that the field will take your sticking points,
incongruencies, and any weak parts of your game and just shove them right in your face, harshly
and brutally, until you fix those things. So in a way its a good thing, because when you approach
10 girls and they all go eww dont touch me you creep, you learn okay theres a problem with
how Im doing my kino, time to zoom-in on my kino and figure out where Im going wrong
here.

The thing about their one-off insults is that theyre not real consistent or specific, so you can
ignore them. If you got 20 insults and 15 of them were that your shirt is ugly, then your shirt is
probably ugly lol But if you get 20 insults and theyre all over the map and vague like youre
gay your haircuts stupid youre weird, its just the girls shooting a shot-gun blast spread of
insults hoping SOMETHING gets through a crack and hits you and makes you react. So you can
just laugh that shit off because when you see them doing it, in your head it should translate to
them saying to you I have NO ammo at all, Im just desperately flinging shit at you and
crossing my fingers here.

and then something along the lines of being a snob which flat-out isnt true

Ya, see? Its like she cant get a reaction out of you so now shes even just making shit UP
hoping youll fall into her frame, and defend yourself (against shit you know isnt even TRUE)
and qualify yourself to her, which is betaing yourself to her, and then she can feel like she
won the little frame battle exchange she instigated because shes insecure and needed to re-
enforce to herself that shes better than you. Its really silly and petty lol

So she might try like youre stupid and you go lol whatever and she goes grrryoure
ugly!! and you go lol whatever and she goes grrryou have a tiny dick! and its not even
something she could KNOW, and you happen to be sensitive/insecure about your wang so you
go what?? no I dont! and she goes aha!! GOTCHA!! and turns to the girls beside her and
goes right girls? this guy totally has a tiny dick! What a loser, I bet its the size of my pinky
lol!! and now shes poking a sore-spot issue with you AND rallying up the people around her to
pile on, and shell do it until you finally cave to the social pressure and she breaks your frame.

Pretty fucked up hey? lol But again, shes not always necessarily an evil horrible bitch even
though its bullying behaviorshes just testing you and trying to keep her world in the order its
supposed to be in. And in fact, a lot of times these girls will be the sweetest girls in the world to
you once theyre 100% sure that youre congruent to who youre portraying yourself as. Its hard
not to want to muff-punch her though, I know, lol
Anyway, so thats the general psychology behind this. The girls from your last Field Report did it
too, where they test you for a sore spot and then try to gang up on you to put social pressure on
you to cave. AMOGs will sometimes do this kind of thing too. It can be frustrating, especially
when they actually DO strike a nerve, and youll react a bunch of times where as soon as you
react youll go ah shit I shouldnt have done that.

But thats okay, because its a learning process. Over time youll learn that a lot of the things they
say really ARENT things that SHOULD affect you. Like a girl making fun of your haircut, who
the fuck cares, why would that affect your state or self-worth in any way, who the fuck is SHE?
lol At the same time, youll also learn what things really DO affect you and where your
boundaries are. Ill let a girl SLAP me, I dont give a fuck at allI say a lot of offensive stuff
and sometimes girls will react by slapping me because it was over the top and Ill just grin and
keep going like it was nothing. Thats not a boundary that really bothers me. But then on the flip
side, a girl whos being a dick to one of my Nice Guy friends will get a full verbal-bitch-slap
reaming-out from me until she feels like a piece of shit and like Im the meanest person in the
world. I learned where my boundaries are, from being tested a bunch over the years.

I like this Joe Rogan clip as an example of boundaries. He really isnt affected by this girl,
because he knows shes irrellevant in the long-run, she doesnt affect his self-worth at all, but at
the same time hes basically unapologetically saying you are crossing my boundaries and if you
keep it up Im going to keep laying into you

The crowd goes wild over the stuff hes saying, and a lot of that is because they know theyre
watching a man express himself from the core and not holding back. Hes not being PC, hes not
trying to appease anyone, hes not holding back his opinion, hes not embarrassed by his
boundaries, hes being completely honest and congruent and expressing himself. Theres
NOTHING that chick can say that will phase him or get through any cracks, his Identity is rock
solid even if its abrasive to the Politically Correct crowd.

At 2:20-ish he threatens her with his dick and says Im a short guy but Ive got a big dick lol
So now picture way back to your earlier post where you said the dance floor uggo sneered at you
for trying to dance with her, or think back to the girl who made fun of your heighthow would
Joe Rogan have handled that? Well he might not have handled it in the best way and he might not
handle it in a way that youll end up handling it when you get your Identity down (being a cool
chill Owen Wilson type guy is as much of an Identity as being a loud asshole), but he sure as shit
would have a way to handle it thats congruent, you know?

Thats part of why I asked you earlier if you had any boundaries, or knew what they were, or
when you last made other people aware of your boundaries when they crossed them or if you just
bottled it up inside, etc. At this stage you probably dont know what your boundaries are yet.
Like ya, the calling you gay or a snob is annoying, but it doesnt REALLY piss you offso
youll probably be able to handle that stuff and laugh it off and down the road itll be completely
insignificant to you. Whereas if a girl called you fat, since youre working on your weight, that
might actually sting you right now. These are things youll learn about yourself as you go.

She teases all the guys in the group, but from her to me its way different.

I actually think you could fuck her lol

I attempt to use the whole two second alpha stare on her remarks.which PISSES her off
even more!

lol you did good, regardless of her reaction. Her getting pissed off is because shes frustrated that
nothing is getting to you. Probably in the past before you found the Manosphere youd
qualify/react more often to this shit shes throwing at you, but now youre not anymore, so its
that frustration of keep being who youre SUPPOSED to be, grrr, why isnt this working
anymore?? And because youre not reacting and youre staying cool, she just starts looking
more and more irrational and petty and she can sense that, so she has to keep trying to up the
ante to get you to reactthus:

Eventually, she actively starts trying to get the other girls around her in on the shit talking.

Maybe SHE cant pressure you into reacting, but maybe the combined social pressure of her and
the 3 girls youre talking to can get you to cave. I actually use this tactic on AMOGs lol, if Im
worried the guys going to hit me Ill use the girls in the group and/or the other guys and/or
passers-by and try to turn the group against him to get him to feel the social pressure and force
him to calm down out of fear of everyone judging him as irrational and angry.

At this point, I kinda break and start reacting way more.

lol its all good. This chick is pro, she knows exactly what shes doing and shes probably been
doing it a lot longer to everyone in her life than some silly 18yo at the bar whos still learning the
ropes of how to use the power she has over men. You stepped into the ring with Tyson and didnt
come out completely mangled, thats pretty decent all things considered. Itll get easier over
time, and youll get more competent at it and eventually youll be 10 steps ahead of her and
know what shes thinking better than she does.

Not in an angry way, but you knowlikein that way where Im somehow justifying myself.

Right, this is what we call qualifying yourself. It feels stupid, right? Like youre DOING it, but
you know you SHOULDNT be doing it, but you cant help it because you just need to do it like
scratching an itch. Down the road youll start using this on girls and getting them to qualify
themselves to you and theyll react the same way you did, where they just NEED to qualify and
feel like they have to justify themselves. Its pretty powerful stuff when you use it consciously.
The old-school PUA examples are (once you pass the hook point and you know you have some
kind of value to the girl) the classic Can you cook? I cant date a girl who cant cook. or Are
you adventurous? etc. where when she qualifies herself to you, you reward her, which sets up a
frame where she wants more rewards so she keeps qualifying herself, creating a loop where she
keeps investing more in the interaction and chasing your validation.

Im starting to see that these skills apply to most every area of life. So much of how youre
treated seems to boil down to how people perceive your SMV to be.

Yup. Welcome to the Matrix. If two people were applying for a job and one guy was a shy
nervous guy who spent all his time studying and he had amazing qualifications but was socially
awkward, and the other guy applying had half or even no qualifications, but was extremely
charistmatic and had an obviously high SMV and could build a connection with people quickly
and get the interviewer talking about how much they both love golf etc., my money would be on
the 2nd guy getting the job. Its kind of a mind-fuck to realize how much societal conditioning
brainwashed us all to believe that working hard will result in the universe rewarding us fairly
when the reality is a lot of people who have good jobs, financial success, great opportunities, etc.
really just got those things by knowing the right people and being liked.

When we get there my plan is to just hang out with the work group for like half an hour to hour
before peeling off to hit on EVERY hot girl in the club.

lol excellent plan. A booth is fun if youre just fucking around with your boys and dont care
about getting laid, but the reality is that most bar/club booths are really awkward logistically for
talking to girls. Your friends wont care because they cant approach girls anyway so theyre
happy drinking in the booth, but you have to be like I have to go to the bathroom and then go
do some approaches. Most of my friends know that Ill occasionally vanish here and there
through the night instead of holding their hands and cuddling around the bar all night.

The expensive VIP booths are often even worsetheyre a good place to bring girls back to, and
youre socially proofed if everyone can see you in your important rich-people boothbut unless
youre in a Vegas style club where promoters bring golddiggers over to your table, youre
segregated from the general population in the club behind a velvet rope or up on a stage etc. and
you dont get to interact with them unless you leave the very expensive VIP booth you paid for
lol

But, I managed to stick to the plan somewhat and make two approaches.

Good on ya. Its all reference experiences that add up over time.
Now she turns toward me wow that was really nice of you.

Shit, not bad for winging it. You basically DHVed a bit and you probably couldve taken this
somewheretill the big guy showed up lol Nothing you can do about that right now. Hell, I
dont even bother with those sets these days, where the guy is clearly over-protectiveits just
not worth the hassle, even if I can tool him he might just end up punching me out because for all
I know shes his girlfriend of 10 years lol

I was feeling kinda shitty over the last set and pretty much made the approach a cheesy pickup
line.

lol one of the ways Tyler recommends getting into state is to purposely do shit like approach as a
cheesy pickup line guy, or to purposely approach like a total AFC asking interview questions, or
purposely approach trying to get shot down or get her to slap you, or approaching using a made
up foreign language, etc. Basically doing stuff that you KNOW probably wont work and is
retarded, but is funny to you and makes you laugh at how dumb what youre trying is. It helps
get you outside of your head and away from outcome dependance and dying for approval
because youre shooting yourself in the foot on purpose from the start. Once you get back into
state, your sets usually go a lot better because your sub-communications are fun instead of needy.

I think really, I just need to nail down this irrational self-confidence at all times thing.

Like I say, it helps to have the reference experiences for it so itll come with time.

But in the meantime, try some Affirmations:

http://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/view-next-topic-vt68159.html?view=next

Saying Affirmations to yourself feels pretty cheesy if youve never done it, and while I dont
really do them now (because my brain is basically telling me how awesome I am 24/7 lol), I
found they helped a lot when I was starting out. I combined a few of them into one long one and
Id recite it while showering, while doing my hair etc., into a mirror before leaving my apartment
for the bar, etc.

Some people respond well to them, some people dont, try doing some Affirmations daily for a
couple weeks and see what it does for your mood. I thought they were completely retarded at
first, but Im always up for at least giving new stuff a fair try, and it turned out they helped get
me jump-started on building that irrational self-confidence thing.

Good luck!
More on boundaries

dont want to be cocky, but this is probably one of the best and most important comments Ive
ever written lol. Covering some external shit but mainly a lot of internal shit in this. This one is
an important read for the newbie/intermediate guys hitting the field regularly and getting into
relationships (Scray, Hunter, Immoralgables, etc.):
To the OP:

Shes fucked him, thought about fucking him, wants to fuck him, or IS fucking him.

Ultimately the entire thing is your fault, which Ill explain. But the next in line for fault is her,
for not introducing you. That told him exactly where you stand with her, which is hes okay for
now but Im looking for better and dont want you to be deterred by him, keep seducing me plz.
This is one of the signals my buddies and I specifically look for when we hit on girls who are
taken: ie whats the dynamic of her relationship with her guydoes she introduce him
immediately? Does he lurk around in the background or take over the conversation? Does she
touch him or does he touch her? Does she basically forget he exists for a few minutes? Does she
talk about him? Does she introduce him as a friend? Does she not mention him until she HAS to?
Does she say thats my boyfriend with a sad tone in her voice that says :( I wish he wasnt
here because I really want to fuck you When the girl leaves, with her lame borefriend chasing
after her looking like a sad puppy dog, we turn to eachother and say poor guy, she wants to fuck
the shit out of you lol and laugh. The dynamics are blatantly obvious when you know what to
look for.

Its NOT the other guys fault at all, because SHE gave him permission to do that, by not
preventing it and not bitching him out for it. Ergo, fighting him is stupid, because hes not the
one in the wronghes just reacting to her signals. Focusing on well he should stay away
because shes my girlfriend and working yourself up into a fist-swinging rage is stupid, because
if you date a smokin hot 8+ girl, you will be throwing punches EVERY NIGHT OF YOUR LIFE
until you end up in jail or dead lol

I dont have to worry about AMOGs with my GFs when Im out with them because my girls will
handle themselves and not let this happen or wont excuse it if it does happen. The only time I
would resort to fighting would be if a guy was constantly harrassing my girl and she had already
made it very clear to him that he was bothering her, and even THEN I would go through other
channels first like taking her to the dance floor and ignoring him, AMOGing him verbally, or
calmly walking over to a bouncer and having him tossed out (thats what theyre there for lol).
Guys who have to resort to fighting are either 1) young enough to still get away with that
nonsense and not care about the consequences, or 2) not socially savvy/powerful/commanding
enough to handle the situation in the thousands of other ways available that dont involve
fighting.

If she wants to get off on me being physical/aggressive/manly, Ill toss her around in the
bedroom. If she specifically wants to get off on seeing me fighting other men, she can go date an
18yo from the kiddie-bars who drunkenly scrap outside at last call every night. This is not
negotiable.
So the one in the wrong and who should be punished is ultimately HER, not him. Now theres
two things to look at here:

1) WHY did she let that happen? Why is she not clinging to you when youre out? Why does she
feel this was acceptable? Why didnt she chew him out?

And 2) How do you punish her and stop/change this behavior for the future? And how do you
prevent it in future girlfriends?

So why did this situation occur? Here are a bunch of reasons:

- maybe shes just not that into you (your value isnt high enough)
- or maybe she likes you but hes got higher value to her than you do right now and her
Hypergamy kicked in
- they clearly have a history (flirting or actual fucking)
- you didnt claim your territory (ie hand around her waist, physically dominating her, basically
making it very clear/obvious that she belongs to you)
- she didnt cling to you (ie she wasnt introducing you, she wasnt touching you, she basically
treated you like an Orbiter)
- she has no fear of losing you (ie shes not at all worried that not making it clear shes your GF
would cause her to lose you)
- she possibly doesnt care if she DID lose you (again this is a value not high enough to care
thing)
- she may have no idea it bothers you
- she may expect you to be able to handle yourself
- she may love the attention and the jealousy drama of playing multiple guys off eachother
- you took her to a place where her value is higher than yours because she worked therenever
ever ever go to a place the girl invites you to, because she will always invite you to a place where
she has Orbiters and high-value to see how you react and if youre ultimately better than all her
other options. You CAN still pull off owning the huge shit-test but its a massive uphill battle
thats silly to voluntarily take on. I flake on girls all the time when they try to arrange where we
should hang out, and tell them to meet me on my turf insteadonce youre in a legit SERIOUS
LTR, you can go into these things and not be tested as hardcore, but in the initial first 3 months?
Youre taking a fucking gamble that you didnt need to take.

Anyway, so the common thread in all of these reasons is that theres no fear of loss in her, so she
treats you like an Orbiter, and theres no fear of loss in her because you arent high enough value
to her. Part of why my girls will interrupt the guy to introduce me to him when I come over, or
will tell him to fuck off if hes crossing the line is because they fear losing me. Im high-value to
them and they know I have a set of standards/expectations and that if they cross those, I will
mercilessly drop them, because I have options and can get other girls. Because of their
Hypergamy (ie they want the highest-value male available to them), they legitimately arent
into the other guys because they know theyre already with a higher-value man, so its easier for
them to tell him to knock it off or to remember to introduce me because theres no conflict of I
know I SHOULD do this, but I kind of want to fuck this other higher-value guy so maybe Ill let
this slide.. like with your situation.

So how do you punish her?

IDEALLY, you should have Soft Nexted her immediately:

http://www.pua-zone.com/showthread.php?5492-How-To-Soft-Next-Step-by-step-instructions-
and-answers-to-questions

ie you shouldve simply walked out and left her to get herself home and ignored her calls for a
few days. Then when you got in touch again, told her in no uncertain terms that her behavior was
unacceptable and that if she wants to be your girlfriend, then when youre out she introduces you
immediately and she doesnt allow guys to get away with that shit around you. If she isnt
willing to do this, then you simply shrug and Hard Next her (ie completely ditch her) and find a
better girl. Personally, I like to let them know why I left with a little hamster fuel like when she
txts where did you go?? Ill throw something like you and AMOG clearly have catch up to
do. Goodnight babe. and turn my phone off. It doesnt have to be like because you were acting
like a fucking whore ahghghaghghghhghg lol Just a one-off calm-but-this-is-the-end-of-the-
conversation txt (its important that you dont have a discussion right then and there, read
Blackdragons post on Nexting for details on that) that points her hamster in the general
direction of me and AMOG? Were just friendsis he mad? Why is he mad? I mean, I guess I
didnt introduce himand AMOG grabbed my tit but he didnt see that, did he? omg maybe hes
mad at me for thatI guess I shouldnt have done it, butwhy wont he answer my txts?? is he
dumping me?? omg Id better phone him!!! and then a few days of stress and hamster-fuel.
Incidentally this also helps keep her from fucking the guy because shes too wrapped up in
worrying about losing you to go home with him.

Now keep in mind that this works when you have high-value to her. If you have LOW-value,
shell go wtf I cant believe hes mad about thatthats stupid. Whatever then, maybe I WILL
fuck AMOG, HES not judging me, hes just giving me good emotions tonight. lol

Doing a Hard Next like a lot of guys are recommending, before attempting to train her with Soft
Nexts is dumb and usually the reaction of butt-hurt guys. You dont take your dog back to the
pound because it shits on the carpet once, thats an insane over-reaction. You train it, and ideally
it learns where to shit and you have no problems and both live happily ever after. If it keeps
shitting despite your training, you take it back to the pound. This is the same concept.
Now I can give you some external steps like Soft Next her and ignore her calls for a few days
bla bla and ya, that might help you out in this specific situation this one time. But lets look at
the much bigger overall picture, that encompasses your entire fucking life and all your future
relationships:

You know the punishment, but how do you prevent it from happening in the first place, with
future girlfriends, from the very start?

1) Be high-value. Always be working on this. Work on your social skills, learn to interact with
other men, learn to flirt with women, have other options, and basically be the guy that she would
worry about losing. Ive said before that while most girls will cheat on their
BFs/fiances/husbands with me, the only ones I absolutely CANT get are the ones who believe
their man is the highest-value man available to them. Those girls will shut me down hard, even
apologizing for it, because their Hypergamy is firing on all cylinders over their man and its
literally not in their reality that they could cheat.

This is why guys who think oh if I get a virgin shell be faithful are dumbit has nothing to
do with that. If you get a virgin, but become a low-value guy to her, she will cheat on you just
like the 22-count bar-star slutty whore. If you get a 22-count bar-star slutty whore, but you are
the highest value guy to her, she will be as faithful as the virgin would. A lot of guys are hoping
to find a virgin/Madonna so they can just keep being pieces of shit in general and not improve
themselves or constantly work on themselves and grow as men throughout their lifethey just
want a guaranteed faithful girl who wont cheat so they can sit on the couch drinking beer and
watching mindless TV and feel like they beat the system by finding a guaranteethen they get
cheated on because someone like me comes along with way higher value and fucks their 1-count
wife

Theres nothing wrong with wanting a virgin wife, as long as the reason you want it ISNT that
you think itll guarantee you shell be faithful no matter what your value to her is, and that you
dont look at it like great, this is my way of avoiding having to stay on top of my game. It all
comes down to Hypergamy.

2) Have a set of personal standards of what behavior is acceptable/not-acceptable to you in

various types of relationships. Like what can a casual fuckbuddy get away with that youre cool
with? Is a fuckbuddy allowed to fuck other guys? Can she only fuck certain types of guys (like
her ex, or only randoms)? Or does she have to only be fucking you (girls will accept this frame if
youre adamant about it and high-value enough)? Can a fuckbuddy flirt with other guys in front
of you? Can she flake on your plans at the last minute or does she need to provide a days notice?
Does a fuckbuddy have to introduce you to her friends, or can she ignore you all night and do her
thing, and just trust that youll hang out at last call?
Then ask yourself what can a new girlfriend get away with that youre cool with? What about a
serious long-term girlfriend? Write this stuff down on a piece of paper even, it will help solidify
things in your mind.

Because you cant enforce Soft/Hard Nexts to punish/change behavior (or reward her to
encourage good behavior) if you dont know what your personal standards and expectations are.
The law is extremely complicated, there are a shitload of nuances to itif you kill someone, was
it in self-defense, did you HAVE to kill them, did you meet them with the intention of killing
them, etc. The law has different charges and different punishments for all of these things, so
when you cross a line, theres a very black and white you were caught speeding, so now you
have to pay a fine. system in place thats enforcable because of how specific the law is. (granted
you get some flex room depending on circumstances, but thats beside the point)

The law doesnt say I dunno, I guess sometimes if you kill a guy, it might be okay or not,
maybe, and I guess you should like, go to jail for some amount of time, I guesswell, I dont
want you to be mad at me so Ill let it slide this time and just go vent on an Internet forum lol

So first and foremost you need to decide your personal standards. This is an important part of
being a man and it spills into other parts of your life. What behaviors do you accept from your
close friends? From casual acquaintances? From business partners or co-workers? From your
children? From YOURSELF? And what degree of punishment (or rewards, if they meet/surpass
your expectations) is deserved? You cant Soft Next your 8yo daughter for throwing a tantrum
over you not buying her a new doll from the toy store and just leave the house for a few days
lolYou cant Soft Next your co-worker for disrespecting you in front of your boss and just
not come into work for a few days lol You have to decide on how you handle these violations of
your personal expectations, but to do that you have to HAVE and KNOW your personal
expectations first.

Were socially conditioned by society to not have any standards. Everyone is a special
snowflake, everyone is beautiful, dont be mean, dont hurt anyones feelings, accept everyone
no matter how shitty they are, if you cant handle me at my worst then you dont deserve me at
my best, etc. etc. So at first you might feel guilty for consciously saying I expect my GF to
introduce me when were out, and I will cut her out of my life cold without looking back if she
refuses to learn to do this. But over time youll understand that ultimately this is better for
everyone involved. Women need you to bring Order to their Chaos. They need you to be the
solid oak tree, rooted and firm, while they scramble around on your branches like a squirrel.

recommend the Manhood 101 stuff if you want to learn more about this concept and solidify the
mindset. The most important part of all of this (which the 1st Manhood video above mentions at
1:40), is that these are YOUR personal standards, that are based on how YOU feel and what you
want and what your goals in life are. I cant give you the list of what your standards should be.
No one else here can. Theres no this standard is alpha, this standard is beta, thats all bullshit.
I dont do it because its alpha, its alpha because I do it.

Part of why PUAs recommend going out a shit-ton and meeting a ton of girls and having a ton of
relationships, is that when you start out you have NO standards. You dont even know you
SHOULD have standards, and youre shamed by social conditioning if you DARE have
standards (skim through Jezebels articles for examples of this lol). This is why guys who dont
have much experience with women often end up with shitty girlsnot even WIVES necessarily,
just GIRLFRIENDS, that they arent even legally attached or bound by having kids together
like CK Louis says fuckin call her and say FUCK YOU, and hand up, and LEAVE her. You can
end that shit with a PHONE CALL. I need a fuckin gun, and a plane ticket, and bleach and
shit They have girlfriends who get fat, who disrespect them, who cheat on them, who eat
unhealthy, who drink too much, who stop dressing up, who stop putting out, etc.

But the guys dating/marrying those women dont know what their standards are, and feel guilty
enforcing their authority, so they end up in dead ends that they could have avoided.

So by going out and meeting a lot of girls, interacting with a lot of people, having a lot of
relationships, you slowly learn okay, this girl did this to me, and it didnt bother me, but this
other girl did this OTHER thing to me and that made me feel like SHITI had no idea I
wouldnt care about that first thing, I always just assumed it would piss me off but it turns out its
really not that big a deal, and I thought that 2nd thing wouldnt bother me but holy SHIT does it
ever bother me, so I will no longer accept that 2nd behavior from my serious long-term
girlfriend, but I WILL allow her to do that 1st thing because I dont care about it.

This is unique to every individual man. My personal standards are VERY different from most
guys, but Ive had a unique journey in life compared to the average guy, and my standards are
personalized to me. On top of that, I will VERY adamantly enforce my standards. If someone
DOES cross my lines, which are way more tolerant than most peoples because Im a pretty chill
guy in general, I will be cut-throat in enforcing punishment (and the reverse, if someone
meets/surpasses my expectations I will reward them handsomely).

Like when I say I dont fight, its not that Im scared to fight or I dunno, maybe sometimes I
might kind of fight or that Ive never thought about it. Its that I have a personal line in my mind
that says I will not get into bar fights (self-defense in dangerous situations or to protect loved
ones is different) if it can be avoided in any way, even if it means apologizing or walking away
like a pussy while someone calls me a chicken, like I would give a shit about that lol I dont care
if people make fun of that, or say it isnt alpha, etc. That has no relevance to me because I am
following MY personal standards, not theirs.
3) Use Soft Nexts the way Blackdragon describes to enforce these personal standards with your
girls. Dont feel guilty for using them or hurting her feelings with them, anymore than you would
feel guilty for training your dog not to shit on the carpet. See the 2nd Manhood video I linked
above for the kinds of shit-tests youll run into enforcing your authority, and understand that its
FINE and its all part of the process of bringing Order to someones life or your relationships
with them.

Combine those 3 things (be high-value, know your personal standards, and enforce them), and
you wont run into these problems again. This can be a lot of work and take a while to figure it
all out (Im STILL learning some of my personal standards, when I enter new situations), but this
is a long-term fix that will affect your entire life and all of your relationships for the rest of your
life. Learning, understanding, and training this could be the difference between ending up with a
wife whos fat, hasnt touched your dick in 3 years, and talks smack about you to all her friends
in front of you while you nod yes dear , or ending up with a wife whos in shape, fucks you
how you want her to, and brags about you to her friends even when youre not aroundand who
introduces you to her friends when youre out together, and who tells guys who grab her tits in
front of you to back the fuck off and apologizes to you for his behavior and fucks your brains out
that night.

Good luck.

Now cue all the eBadasses calling me a pussy for not telling you to just punch his lights out lol

General notes on text game

Side-tangent: When I started with text game there werent many resources on it because the
concept of txting and cell phones was still newback when I started we were all about actually
calling the girl on the phone, girls would even give out a home phone number lol. So most of my
understanding of txt game comes from just txting a fuckton of girls over the years, but, like most
game concepts, guys who all spend a lot of time in the field come to generally the same
conclusions, so a lot of Juliens advice gels with mine even if we both figured a lot of it out
independently through experience:

Some things to keep in mind with Juliens advice:

1) He builds a shit-ton of attraction in person when he first meets the girl. Hes not like hey,
cool, hows it going, this is nice weather, oh you go to School? I go to that School too, we should
hang out sometime zzzzwhich is what most guys, even guys who are good at pickup, do.
So when Julien does his jumbotron right to the point What are you doing Saturday? txts, he
gets away with it because the girl remembers him and how amazing their interaction was and the
roller-coaster of emotions he pushed her through etc.
Its that thing Ive been saying where when you have high-value, THEN you can be the aloof
laconic guy and stand at the bar sipping your martini or txt jumbotron txts, because shes
attracted so shes curious about you. If you dont have high-value (ie you entered the club and
then posted up leaning against the bar, not talking to anyone, just hoping your nice suit will be
enough), she wont give a shit or remember you.

So if youre making a massive impact on them like Julien does (watch his in-field vids on
YouTube), then you can get away with what hes talking about, but if youre lower-key than him,
expect to have to do some rapport/comfort building.

2) Im a lot more verbose in my txting than Julien and I do a lot of my comfort/rapport-building

via txt, but thats just my personality and Im good at it, so dont think that you have to do it my
way either. Figure out what works for your vibe and calibrate to the girl and your relationship
with her and how the pickup went down and her interest level etc.

3) His rule about try the simplest most direct route first, THEN complicate things if that doesnt
work, is solid. He talks about it in another video (cant remember which off the top of my head)
where Plan A is the simplest direct route, B is more complicated, C is way more complicated, D
is a shit-show of gamestart with A, and only go to B if you have to, and then only if B doesnt
work go to C, etc. Its a good principle to keep in mind in general with regards to pickup.

4) Always be pushing for the meet-up. Ive said this before, youre not getting a # to just dick
around and have a txt buddy. Youre getting it to push towards another meet-upso do like he
says and be pushing it forward toward meeting up, dont get sidetracked into sending eachother
gay pictures and talking about your day and not leading it anywhere.

Anyway, its all solid advice, especially the little details like being discreet when you get her #
(Ive banged a few girls in secret where their friends NEVER wouldve let me get her # if they
realized what I was doing) and using your name and txting an hour before the Day 2 etc.
Everyone should give this vid a quick watch.

My txt game is wicked-tight. When other guys send a lot of txts its just gay shit that isnt
heading anywhere.

Its like how someone who talks a lot usually comes off beta and trying to hold attention
desperatelybut then you watch Russell Brand flirting with chicks and its like oh, shit, okay that
can work.

The diff between how Russell Brand blathers on endlessly and how most average guys would is
that everything Russell says/describes is designed to take the girl on a massive emotional roller
coaster of ups and downs and mental imagery and innuendo and teasing and push/pull and
leading etc. so hes actually packing a lot of game concepts into his verbals.

My txt convos never look like:

Guy: Hows it going?

Girl: Good u?
Bored at work lol what u up to?
Just hangin out
Hows the hangover?
Lol doing better
Sounds like a fun night lol did you end up blah blah? Because this one time I blah blah
Ya it was! I only blah blahed once and then we went blah blah

Thats the kind of guy who should just be txting one word replies because his txting so much is
just filler. Like someone filling in silences with ums and uhhs. Its technically kind of
building a little comfort at best but theres no game principles involved in it.

My txting looks more like:

Me: quit thinking about me, I cant get any sleep when Im running thru your dreams all night.
Jerk.

Her: lol o ya I couldnt help it.

Me: I understand youre madly in love with me, but youre going to have to try to restrain
yourself. I recommend that restraining involve handcuffs. In fact I volunteer to help you with
that. Dont worry, mine are fuzzy ones.

Her: lol maybe I already have a pair

Me: of course you do, dirty birdy. I knew from the moment I saw you. I can read you like a
book. I know your SOUL.

Her: lol ur crazy

Me: I knew you would say that. Now quit interrupting my workday to tell me about your 50
Shades of fantasies, I have work to do and I cant balance my laptop on a boner.

Her: lol u txted me!!

Me: Its alright, you dont have to hide your love. Now I have to go polish my handcuffs.
Pervert.

Ill basically just fuck around and amuse myself but all my txts involve combinations of pushing
toward sex, innuendo, push/pull, accusations and cold-reads, role playing, future projection,
callback humor, us vs them, etc. so Im txting a shitload but on her end she ends up distracted
from whatever shes doing being she cant believe the shit that Im writing to her.

I usually initiate my txting during the slow work day (around noon) and late at night (9pm+)
because those are the times shell be free to txt for a bit. If we pass 1pm and shes still txting
back then I pretty much keep her distracted thru the rest of her work day. At night Ill drop more
innuendo and see if she latches on and plays back and forth with me on it, at which point Ill start
downshifting into more sex discussion (stories experiences curiousities etc) and sexting because I
know shes probably alone in bed semi-naked and I can escalate describing sexy fantasy scenes
of us and get her turned on enough to rub one out before going to sleepand of course shell
wake up thinking about me and Ill be on her mind for part of her morning.

Some girls dont know how to respond to my txts so they look like I wrote up above, just little
responses till I switch to comfort and they can txt more because they dont have to be
funny/witty. But a lot of girls will try to keep up with me and play back and occasionally I meet a
girl who can actually keep up and well both send off big page-long txts like mine above. The
attraction with those girls spikes fast because they dont meet guys who can have them reaching
to try to out-wit them and its exciting.

For stuff like meeting up a lot of guys txts look like:

Guy: come to Club Friday. Dress nice

Her: lol I have plans already
(4 hours later): Cancel them.

And that can work if the girl knows you well and you have enough value already and if youre
just inviting her to a nice safe thing like dinner or a party nightbut Im shooting for having her
come over to fuck, so I have to get some emotional steam going like:

Me: you should come over Friday.

Her: lol o really

Me: well we could go to a bar instead but youre a girl and girls take forever to get ready so
well end up being late and then one of us will have to give the bouncer a blowjob to get in and I
have lockjaw from going down on you last night.
Her: omg!!! Cant believe u said that. And we never had sex u must have me confused.

Me: oh right that was a dream I had. My bad. I guess that explains the whole thing with the
goat. And how I managed to last an incredible 31 seconds breaking my former record of 30.

Her: lol wow u sure know how to sell yourself

Me: I would never sell myself. Who would pay for a night of disappointment followed by a
morning of shame, regret, and being kicked out for my pretend early business meeting?

Her: lol u wouldnt throw me out

Me: no thats just the ugly girls. You can stay for breakfast, as long as you make it. In nothing
but heels and an apron.

Her: lol thats how I always cook

Me: I dont believe you. You should come over Friday and well cook dinner. We can wear
clothes though, I look terrible in heels and an apron.

Her: lol just dinner hey? I dont believe you

Me: well after dinner we can sit awkwardly on opposite ends of the couch with a barrier of
pillows between us to ensure we dont accidentally cuddle, but youll have to help me stack the
pillows. And if you turn it into a pillow fight youll get a pillow spanking. Troublemaker.

Her: lol what time?

So again a lot of what I do is pack a bunch of game concepts into individual txts. I can come up
with this stuff on the fly because Ive been doing it for a while and my in-person game is the
same style. A big reason why I can build so much comfort/attraction is that Im demonstrating a
TON of my personality with these txts. Like after an afternoon of this kind of txting she feels like
shes known me forever and that Im fascinating and Im easily the most interesting txt
conversation shes ever had. Shes laughed, been offended, been relieved, been qualifying
herself, been excited, been mad, been puzzled and mystified, etc. way more shit than most of her
txt convos involve with normal guys.

When I can do this a few times congruently she realizes okay this is how this guy is, wow, I
want to meet him, especially if I lead it into sexual comfort/rapport building late at night.

You could say but YaReally isnt this dancing monkey shit? But the difference between this
and that is that the dancing monkey isnt headed anywhere. Hes in one spot trying to keep her
there by trying to keep her attention. What Im doing is plowing forward like a train and
dragging her along with me.

Like with the dinner txts above I pitch to come over which I know she wont accept right away.
Then I go off on a crazy emotional rollercoaster tangent, but Im always looking to head back to
the initial invite and I eventually return to it. So everything Im txting is heading toward my goal
of having her over to fuck. Im never just txting for the sake of txting or txting like one of her
girlfriends or orbiters.

This is just how I run my attraction stuff. For comfort/rapport I tone the crazy down a bit and get
more into deep emotional and sexual discussionsbut again I save that for night time
conversations, never daytime. That stuff is where Ill get into pages and pages of multiple txts
because Im txting stuff like my views on relationships/monogamy and sexuality and jealousy etc
so theres a lot to explain but by then Ive built enough attraction that she wants to read it all and
shes captivated by our conversation and shes sharing her pages of feelings/experiences, so it
helps build our connection. Then the next morning I go back to playful fun lighthearted stuff
because I know the seeds have been planted and Ive laid out my groundwork for a casual
fuckbuddy situ.

At that point Ive already run all of the game I would run in person, weve gone thru all the
mystery method stages etc and I can arrange her coming over usually to watch a movie (when
she shows up I just pin her against the wall and make out and escalate right to the bedroom,
because weve already talked about sex enough that I know she wants it), but sometimes I can
get them to come over literally to have sex, like theyll ignore their ASD and admit they need me
to fuck them (then they get nervous right before coming over and I have to run some quick
lighthearted attraction game to get over that last little hump lol)

Anyway so I do a lot of txting. My phone is always going off and Ill txt all day/night long if it
means securing a casual FB without having to go to dinner etc lol. My job is lax so I can just
shoot off txts all day.

Some guys have money and time to burn so they dont mind going out for dinner and drinks and
doing this all thenbut Im lazy and poor and dont want to do that so id rather spend a few
days idly txting than waste a whole evening going out, buying drinks, building comfort,
competing with distractions and cockblocks and logistics, her screening me as a provider, etc.
that might end up with not even getting the lay that night.

Wasnt expecting this to be so long but hey, theres a glimpse at my txt game.

Also the interesting thing I found is that if I stay congruent to my verbose txts, shell eventually
try to keep up with me. Like if she starts out typing like wut u up 2? And we txt for a bit and I
stick to proper grammar/spelling, eventually (when I have enough value to her) shell clean her
txting up a lot with me and txt with decent spelling/grammar like a normal human being lol I
actually take that as an ioi.