Professor Ball
Its common that we hear some sort of gossip in the workplace, and we hear it about
several different things. The main type of gossip, however, Im quite sure relates to favoritism in
some way. People are quick to judge or even hate those that they work with because they believe
they are being favorited and possibly even treated better than others. Ive seen favoritism first
hand in the work place, and Ive seen the different forms of it. The issue that this paper will be
representing is favoritism regarding relationships in the workplace, and family members working
together in the workplace. There are strong viewpoints for both sides, which are thinking they
should be allowed and those thinking they should not. This paper will consider each viewpoint,
but have an obvious agreement on which one I believe is right. In doing this, I will be looking at
how these situations affect co-workers, the company, production, and a possible solution to help
Relationships
Its important to understand the key aspects of relationships in general, and how they
should be presented in the workplace. According to the MindTools1 website, which is a site that
workplace relationships, states that it is important to have good working relationships. The
relationships that they discuss in this website are not regarding romantic relationships, however, I
believe that any romantic relationship most likely starts at this level, and that it should not
initially hurt the company. Human beings are naturally social beings, we socialize at many levels
and we need this socialization like we need food and water. When we socialize, and have good
work relationships, we tend to be happier, therefore work is more enjoyable, and we tend to be
1 https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/good-relationships.htm.
more innovative and creative. A good relationship is defined to have these characteristics: trust,
mutual respect, mindfulness, welcoming diversity, and open communication. The ways to build a
good work relationship are by, developing people skills, identifying your relationship needs,
schedule time to build these relationships, focusing on your emotional intelligence, appreciate
others, be positive, manage your boundaries, avoid gossiping, and listen actively. If these steps
are implemented in not only normal co-worker relationships, but romantic relationships as well,
which they should be, then there should be no issues arising in the workplace regarding
relationships, because even if two people are romantically involved, everyone should already
have work relationships with one another and be able to respect each others decisions without
Co-workers usually react differently depending on the type of the relationship and what level the
relationship is at. According to an article on the balance2, most people dont mind workplace
relationships as long as they are not marriage relationships or between a supervisor and his/her
employee. According to surveys conducted, relationships between those of different ranks, such
as supervisor and regular employee are a big no no, as 99% state that these relationships
should not be allowed. Although I completely understand why this is, I dont think that it should
be forbidden until a problem arises. If the relationship is kept professional, as it should be in any
sense when it comes to your job, and the person isnt hired just because the supervisor is the
applicants significant other, then there should be no issue. There are steps that can be taken,
which will be mentioned later on, that can help keep these issues of favoritism from arising.
Today, because co-workers are usually with each other for 8 hours every day, and are constantly
communicating and getting to know each other. He states that the office (or whatever your job
environment may be) is perfect for these relationships to build because co-workers tend to have
the same education level, interests, and even values. Also, according to other surveys taken and
listed in the article on the balance4 site, 55% of the HR professionals that responded to the survey
said that marriage is the most likely outcome from the relationships they experienced. Why
would a company want to discourage bringing two people together like this, especially since
people spend close to half their day at work? Granted, some couples know that they would not
like to work with their significant other, because they cannot agree on work habits/methods, so
they dont believe couples should work together, however, not all couples let work get to their
relationships personally and know how to work together. Relationships should be left alone in
the workplace, regardless of where it is at, unless issues arise, and every company should have a
system of handling these issues so that everyone benefits until things become so bad that a move
Family Members
When it comes to hiring family members in the workplace, the issues that arise are a lot like
those of romantic relationships between employees, especially if there is family members hired
where there is a family member supervisor and family member that is a regular employee. I have
3 https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sideways-view/201312/workplace-relationships.
(paragraph 4).
4 https://www.thebalance.com/tips-about-dating-sex-and-romance-at-work-1916861. (Workplace
Romance Policies).
seen this favoritism, or nepotism as it is also referred to, first hand at one job, because there was
a mom in a higher up position and told the supervisor below her that handled hiring that she was
going to hire her daughter regardless of the interview. This, in my opinion, should not be allowed
in the workplace, because this is direct favoritism, especially if the child or other family member
is not qualified or underqualified for the position. Fortunately, in my case this was just a fast
food position, so no real skills were required, however, it is still wrong, because she had not had
any previous experience, and someone with more experience could have been chosen and it
Adam Callinan5, a young entrepreneur, believes there are four reasons why you should
not have a family member work with you (although this is for your own company, it also works
with working in the same company together). These reasons are that, emotions are always
involved, expectations will vary, your family members will be insiders, and the obvious
perceived nepotism. He is only embracing the negative aspects of family working together, and
not accepting anything positive coming out of it. Ive also seen situations in the workplace where
two family members work together, and I think that if anything, they help boost each others
morale if one or the other is feeling down or despaired, because they usually understand the
person and can help them cope if they are having a hard time. Also, as with a relationship in the
workplace, I believe that as long as each employee is still being professional, doing their work,
Another issue that arises with family members working in the same company is that one family
member may be looked down upon if the other one decides not to show up. An individual family
members actions should not affect the other family member(s), everyone should be held
Human Resource Management (SHRM)6 suggests that family referrals may even be an excellent
way to fill positions, and there are some companies that will only hire people based on these
referrals, and they have little to no issues. The issues that arise regarding nepotism are due to
improper systems being set up by HR to handle them, because, as with relationships, there
Qualifications
In order to be accepted into a job, one normally needs to meet a certain set of standards,
according to a company handbook (usually). These qualifications may include experience (or
lack thereof for entry level positions), reliable transportation, a high school diploma, a college
degree, flexibility in hours, etc. This is where chapter 5 in Dias HR7 text comes in: selection. A
company is already spending a lot of time and money in recruitment, that when it comes down to
hiring people, it should be the best interest of the company to find those who are qualified,
regardless of whether they are or are not a family member or significant other of a current
employee. As long as said applicant meets the developed criteria, aces their interview, has a good
If relationships or family members are bad in the workplace because of emotions that are there or
because of the way others react towards their co-workers, then why arent the reactors
emotions wrong instead? What makes their reactions right towards their co-workers, just because
6 https://www.shrm.org/resourcesandtools/tools-and-samples/policies/pages/cms_015061.aspx.
(Paragraph 2).
the family members or who are the significant others arent considered, and it is due primarily
because of the favoritism. Now, mentioned previously when discussing how to have good
workplace relationships, is one of the steps of how to build a good relationship, which is
focusing on your emotional intelligence. Chapter 9 of Dias8 does a great job of explaining what
this intelligence is and it states that it is one of the most important aspects to good
communication. A researcher on E.I. mentions that there are five main aspects to E.I. and they
are, knowing your emotions, managing your emotions, motivating yourself, recognizing and
understanding other peoples emotions, and managing relationships. Managing ones emotions is
key in a workplace, because there are way more than relationships or family members that may
irritate another employee. Policy, managerial style, customers, and so much more can all be
issues linked to a workers emotional issues. If a company is willing to work with employees and
have regulations set to where they can help employees with issues arising, issues of any kind,
then the company would be better off as well as their workers. Also, another thing comes to mind
when it comes to managing your emotions, and that is, grow up! I know it may sound harsh, but
people need to be responsible for their own actions and worry about themselves and not worry
about other workers lifestyles. If there is clear, undeniable favoritism, such as employees being
hired only because they are known and not based on merit, or if only certain people are being
promoted or praised even though they do not do work or because they are linked in some way,
then these should be brought up with higher members of the company. Favoritism does not only
happen with relatives or significant others, it can happen between best friends, and not even
about themselves, their job, and doing what they need to do to take care of themselves.
Now that we understand that people SHOULD be hired regardless of their relationship
with current workers, as long as they meet the necessary standards set by the company, now we
can consider what should qualify as standards to move someone out of department or terminate
them due to these relationships. I believe that these employees should be treated equally
compared to every other employee. If someone who is related or in a relationship with another
worker is following along with the performance issues stated in chapter 10 of Dias HR9 text,
such as, constantly being late or leaving early, having other family issues (such as with children),
spending too much time on personal things at work, abusing drugs or alcohol, stealing,
nonperforming, etc., then they should be interviewed accordingly to determine what actions need
to be taken. Regardless, these are the same standards that should be held towards any other
employee. Neither kind of employee should receive any sort of special treatment, but evaluated
on their performance. Not only should everyone be treated equally in determining whether or not
their performance is bad, but they should be treated equally when considered for appraisal, which
is discussed in chapter 11 of Dias HR10 text. When employees are considered for appraisal,
validity issues should be checked regarding their performance. As chapter 11 states, the aspects
of performance should be based on the key skills and responsibilities of the job. This is how all
employees should be considered. Although favoritism or nepotism is a serious issue, not all
people should suffer because of a couple cases of this in the workplace. A simple, yet disciplined
Policy
out of the department or termination depending on the employees' actions and according to the
employee standards that everyone is held to. There should be a discipline system set for those
who break violations such as public displays of affection, inappropriate sexual behavior,
bullying, and for other obvious reasons such as attendance and nonperforming attitudes. Also, I
believe that all companies should initiate a system where each employee is coached in emotional
intelligence management and have an open-door policy so that their employees can share their
feelings and concerns before they start making formal complaints. If a relative or significant
other is being interviewed for the job then someone who is neutral should do the interview no
matter what, even if they must get an outsider to perform it. This will help with suspicious bias,
and they would be held to all standards and not given special treatment. They should make
employees aware that if they are to work in these circumstances then they must follow all proper
behavior and work regulations that the company has. The ultimate goal is for the company to hire
all the right people to benefit the company's needs, but also encourage positive work
relationships, not discourage romantic relationships, allow family members to work together, all
while enforcing the concept that everyone is equal and should not be judged. I summarize this all
up by stating that, no one should be excluded from being able to work if they are able to do the
job, unless they bring issues to the table. Everyone matters, and it shouldnt be left up to those
who arent in relationships to decide if a person should be allowed to work for a company, it
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https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/good-relationships.htm.
Author, N/A. (July 3, 2014). Hiring Policy: Hiring Family Members and Former Employees.
https://www.shrm.org/resourcesandtools/tools-and-samples/policies/pages/cms_015061.aspx.
Grensing-Pophal, Lin. (Sep. 1, 2007). All in the Family. SHRM: Society for Human Resource
https://www.shrm.org/hr-today/news/hr-magazine/Pages/0907pophal.aspx.
Heathfield, Susan. (August 17, 2016). Tips About Dating, Sex and Romance at Work. the
https://www.thebalance.com/tips-about-dating-sex-and-romance-at-work-
1916861.
Author, N/A. (Pub. N/A). Nepotism: Favoring relatives and friends in the workplace.
Author, N/A. (Pub. N/A). Employment of relatives company policy. Workable. Retrieved from
https://resources.workable.com/employment-of-relatives-company-policy.
Callinan, Adam. (June 24, 2015). 4 Reasons You Should Never Hire a Family Member.
https://open.umn.edu/opentextbooks/BookDetail.aspx?bookId=71.