Name : _____________________________Class : ________________ Date : ______________

Using Precise Language

Directions: rewrite the following sentences to replace vague language with precise
language or by revising and combining sentences.

Example:
Vague Sentence - I think that there should be law against using too much water.
Precise Sentence - It should be illegal to waste water.

1. I think it may be true that you can make water turn into steam if you make the
water hot enough.

Ans : I think water evaporates when it boils.

2. I will start to go at exactly 10:30 in the morning.

Ans : I will go at 10.30 in the morning / a.m.

3. We are better than everyone else at chess.

Ans : We are the best chess players / We are the best at chess.

4. Karen is wearing boots of the most extremely high quality in the world.

Ans : Karen is wearing boots of highest/very high quality.

5. I just cant believe how incredibly fast time goes by when you are not doing
something totally boring.

Ans : . I cant believe time flies/ how fast time goes by when youre engaged/doing
something entertaining/enjoyable/

6. Tom is a generous guy.

Ans : Tom is generous.

7. The two twins are like, perfectly identical.

Ans : The twins are identical.

8. Its getting near the time that the show is going to start.

Ans : The show is about to start.

9. He dropped out of school on account of the fact that it was necessary for him
to help support his family.

Ans : He dropped out of school to support his family.

Name : _____________________________Class : ________________ Date : ______________

10. There are many ways in which a student who is interested in meeting foreign
students may come to know one.

Ans : Any student who wants to meet foreign students can do so in many ways.

11. It is very unusual to find someone who has never told a deliberate lie on
purpose.

Ans : Rarely will you find someone who has never told a deliberate lie.

12. The subjects that are considered most important by students are those that
have been shown to be useful to them after graduation.

Ans : Students think that the most important subjects are those that will be useful
after graduation.

13. Some people believe in capital punishment, while other people are against it;
there are many opinions on this subject.

Ans : There are people for and against capital punishment.

14. Sometimes Stan went running with Blanche. She was a good athlete. She
was on the track team at school.

Ans : Sometimes Stan went running with Blanche, a good athlete on the track team
at school.

15. Taylor brought some candy back from Europe. It wasn't shaped like American
candy. The candy tasted kind of strange to him.

Ans : Taylor brought some candy back from Europe which was not shaped like
American candy and tasted strange.

Using Writers Craft and Language for Impact

A Short Biography of Jean Jones

Jean Jones was very poor. Each month, she had a very small amount of money that
she received from her family and friends. She had a hard time paying bills each
month, but seemed to get them paid on time. Going out with friends was difficult for
her because she usually had no money.

However, one day, Ms. Jones decided to try the lottery, and she won. Since then,
she has been able to do what she wants because she can afford to, although she
makes sure that she helps those in need since she knows what that feels like.

A Short Biography of Jean Jones

Name : _____________________________Class : ________________ Date : ______________

Never knowing the beauty of a full wallet or purse, Jean Jones often struggled to
make ends meet except for benevolent assistance from loved ones. Each month,
invoices and dollar signs confronted her, though she usually won the battle. A simple
get-together was practically impossible due to the natural cost of such trips.

However, within this tunnel of despair, a silver lining was spotted in the form of a
winning set of numbers. A chance was taken, a risk was allowed, and victory was
sweet. Now, as she walks the golden gait of a winner, she enjoys luxuries and
leisure once unavailable while still fulfilling that emptiness she once had that she
witnesses in others.

Notice how the usage of carefully placed adjectives and verbs gives more meaning
and feeling to the overall writing.

What are some of the differences you see in these two writings?

After you have written some of the differences, please discuss with your
partner/group and write down any differences others noticed that you did not write
down: