VICTORIAN COLLEGE OF THE ARTS

The University of Melbourne

School of Drama
Bachelor of Dramatic Art - Acting
Audition Monologues
Requirements for 2007

Please read the following instructions carefully:

Choose one piece from the selection of pieces from the plays of Shakespeare.

Choose a second piece from the selection of pieces from contemporary plays.

It is essential that both your pieces are chosen from this VCA list, otherwise we cannot
audition you. You may wish to read the entire play to further your understanding of the
context of the piece. For that purpose we have included a list of possible sources of
the text (libraries and bookshops). It will not always be possible to source copies of the
entire play.

The pieces you choose should be contrasting; they should also be speeches to which
you relate and which you think show you to advantage.

Here are some notes to help you prepare and present your pieces:

They must be learnt. We are unable to audition you otherwise.

Do not use accents. They are not necessary or important for auditions at this
school.

With the Shakespeare speeches, by all means observe the verse form and
language, but do not let them intimidate you. A connection to meaning is all that is
needed.

We are not, at this stage, interested in seeing if you can play characters well
outside your age range. A piece of this kind might be suitable only if you can relate
to it in a personal way.

Try to present the speeches in a way which shows an understanding of the text and
which is simple and truthful.

Page 22 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007
 FEMALE

Richard II Act I Scene ii

William Shakespeare
Duchess:

Finds brotherhood in thee no sharper spur?

F E M A L E Hath love in thy old blood no living fire?
Edward's seven sons, whereof thyself art one,
Were as seven vials of his sacred blood,
Or seven fair branches springing from one root.
Some of those seven are dried by nature's course,
Some of those branches by the Destinies cut;
But Thomas my dear lord, my life, my Gloucester,
One vial full of Edward's sacred blood,
One flourishing branch of his most royal root,
Is crack'd, and all the precious liquor spilt,
Is hack'd down, and his summer leaves all faded,
By envy's hand, and murder's bloody axe.
Ah, Gaunt, his blood was thine! that bed, that womb,
That mettle, that self-mould, that fashioned thee
Made him a man; and though thou livest and breathest,
Yet art thou slain in him; thou dost consent
In some large measure to thy father's death
In that thou seest thy wretched brother die,
Who was the model of thy father's life.
Call it not patience, Gaunt, it is despair;
In suff'ring thus they brother to be slaughter'd,
Thou showest the naked pathway to thy life,
Teaching stern murder how to butcher thee.
That which in mean men we intitle patience
Is pale cold cowardice in noble breasts.
What shall I say? to safeguard thine own life,
The best way is to venge my Gloucester's death.

School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 21
 FEMALE
King Henry IV, Part Two Act II Scene iii CONTENTS
William Shakespeare Male Contemporary
A Bright Room Called Day
Tony Kushner ........................................................................................................ p2
Lady Percy: Curse of the Starving Class
Sam Shepard ........................................................................................................ p3
O yet, for Gods sake, go not to these wars! Aristocrats
The time was, father, that you broke your word Brian Friel ............................................................................................................. p4
Wild Honey
When you were more endeared to it than now; Michael Frayn ....................................................................................................... p5
When your own Percy, when my hearts dear Harry, Up the Road
Threw many a northward look to see his father John Harding ........................................................................................................ p6
Bring up his powers; but he did long in vain. Male Shakespeare
Who then persuaded you to stay at home? Measure for Measure Act II Scene ii
William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p7
There were two honours lost, yours and your sons. Julius Caesar Act I Scene ii
For yours, the God of heaven brighten it! William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p8
For his, it stuck upon him as the sun King Lear Act I Scene ii
In the grey vault of heaven, and by his light William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p9
The Taming of the Shrew Act IV Scene i
Did all the chivalry of England move William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p10
To do brave acts. He was indeed the glass Romeo and Juliet Act I Scene iv
Wherein the noble youth did dress themselves. William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p11
He had no legs that practised not his gait; Female Contemporary
And speaking thick, which nature made his blemish, The Rain Dancers
Karin Mainwaring .................................................................................................. p12
Became the accents of the valiant; Low Level Panic
For those that could speak low and tardily Claire McIntyre ...................................................................................................... p13
Would turn their own perfection to abuse, Wild Honey
To seem like him. So that in speech, in gait, Michael Frayn ....................................................................................................... p14
Three Sisters
In diet, in affections of delight, Anton Chekhov ..................................................................................................... p15
In military rules, humours of blood, The Art of Success
He was the mark and glass, copy and book, Nick Dear .............................................................................................................. p16
That fashiond others. And him - O wondrous him! Female Shakespeare
O miracle of men! - him did you leave, The Winter's Tale Act III Scene ii
William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p17
Second to none, unseconded by you, The Winter's Tale Act III Scene ii
To look upon the hideous god of war William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p18
In disadvantage, to abide a field Troilus and Cressida Act III Scene ii
Where nothing but the sound of Hotspurs name William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p19
King Henry IV, Part Two Act II Scene iii
Did seem defensible: so you left him. William Shakespeare ............................................................................................ p20
Never, O never, do his ghost the wrong Richard II Act I Scene ii
To hold your honour more precise and nice William Shakespeare............................................................................................. p21
With others than with him! Let them alone.
This page is deliberately blank .............................................................................. p22

Page 20 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 1
 MALE FEMALE
A Bright Room Called Day Troilus and Cressida Act III Scene ii
Tony Kushner William Shakespeare
Baz: Cressida

Yesterday I was on my way to buy oranges. I eat them constantly Hard to seem won: but I was won, my lord,
in the winter, even though they cost so much, because they prevent With the first glance that ever--pardon me--
colds. On my way to the grocer's I passed a crowd in front of an office If I confess much, you will play the tyrant.
building; I asked what was going on and they showed me that a man I love you now; but not, till now, so much
had jumped from the highest floor and was dead. They had covered the But I might master it: in faith, I lie;
man with tarpaper but his feet were sticking out at angles that told you My thoughts were like unbridled children, grown
something was very wrong. There was a pink pool of red blood mixed Too headstrong for their mother. See, we fools!
with white snow. I left. Why have I blabbd? who shall be true to us,
When we are so unsecret to ourselves?
At the grocer's I felt guilty and embarrassed buying these fat oranges But, though I loved you well, I wood you not;
for myself only minutes after this man had died. I knew why he had And yet, good faith, I wishd myself a man,
jumped. I thought of him opening the window, high up, and the cold air... Or that we women had mens privilege
Of speaking first. Sweet, bid me hold my tongue,
On my way home I reimagined the whole thing, because I felt a little For in this rapture I shall surely speak
sick at heart. The dead man was sitting up in the snow, and now the The thing I shall repent. See, see, your silence,
tarpaper covered his feet. As I passed by I gave him one of my oranges. Cunning in dumbness, from my weakness draws
He took it. He stared at the orange, as though holding it could give him My very soul of counsel! stop my mouth.
back some of the warmth he'd lost. All day, when I closed my eyes, I
could see him that way, Sitting in the snow, holding the orange, and
comforted. Still bloody, still dead, but... comforted.

Page 2 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 19
 FEMALE
The Winter's Tale
William Shakespeare
Hermione:
Sir, spare your threats:
The bug which you would fright me with I seek.
To me can life be no commodity:
The crown and comfort of my life, your favour,
I do give lost; for I do feel it gone,
But know not how it went. My second joy
And first-fruits of my body, from his presence
I am barrd, like one infectious. My third comfort
Starrd most unluckily, is from my breast,
The innocent milk in its most innocent mouth,
Haled out to murder: myself on every post
Proclaimed a strumpet: with immodest hatred
The child-bed privilege denied, which longs
To women of all fashion; lastly, hurried
Here to this place, i the open air, before
I have got strength of limit. Now, my liege,
Tell me what blessings I have here alive,
That I should fear to die? Therefore proceed.
But yet hear this: mistake me not; no life,
I prize it not a straw, but for mine honour,
Which I would free, if I shall be condemnd
Upon surmises, all proofs sleeping else
But what your jealousies awake, I tell you
Tis rigour and not law. Your honours all,
I do refer me to the oracle:
Apollo be my judge!
Page 18 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007
MALE
Act III Scene ii Curse of the Starving Class
Sam Shepard
Wesley:
I was lying there on my back. I could smell the avocado
blossoms. I could hear the coyotes. I could hear stock cars
squealing down the street. I could feel myself in my bed in my
room in this house in this town in this state in this country. I could
feel this country close like it was part of my bones. I could feel
the presence of people outside, at night, in the dark. Even sleeping
people I could feel. Even all the sleeping animals. Dogs. Peacocks.
Bulls. Even tractors sitting in their wetness, waiting for the sun to
come up. I was looking straight up at the ceiling at all my model
airplanes hanging by all their thin metal wires. Floating. Swaying
very quietly like they were being blown by someone's breath.
Cobwebs moving with them. Dust laying on their wings. Decals
peeling off their wings. My P-39. My Messerschmitt. My Jap Zero.
I could feel myself lying far below them on my bed like I was on
the ocean and overhead they were on reconnaissance. Scouting me.
Floating. Taking pictures of the enemy. Me, the enemy. I could feel
the space around me like a big, black world. I listened like an animal.
My listening was afraid. Afraid of sound. Tense. Like any second
something could invade me. Some foreigner. Something undescribable.
Then I heard the Packard coming up the hill. From a mile off I could
tell it was the Packard by the sound of the valves. The lifters have
a sound like nothing else. Then I could picture my Dad driving it.
Shifting unconsciously. Downshifting into second for the last pull
up the hill. I could feel the headlights closing in. Cutting through the
orchard. I could see the trees being lit one after the other by the lights,
then going back to black. My heart was pounding. Just from Dad
coming back.
School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 3
 MALE FEMALE
Aristocrats The Winter's Tale Act III Scene ii
Brian Friel William Shakespeare

Casimir: Paulina:

Yes yes. I discovered a great truth when I was nine. No, not a great truth; What studied torments, tyrant, hast for me?
but I made a great discovery when I was nine - not even a great discovery What wheels? racks? fires? what flaying? boiling?
but an important, a very important discover for me. I suddenly realised I was In leads or oils? What old or newer torture
different from other boys. When I say I was different I don't mean - you know, Must I receive, whose every word deserves
good Lord, I don't for a second mean I was - you know - as they say nowadays To taste of thy most worst? Thy tyranny,
'homo-sexual' - good heavens I must admit, if anything, Eamon, if anything I'm Together working with thy jealousies
- (looks around) - I'm vigorously hetero-sexual ha-ha. But of course I don't (Fancies too weak for boys, too green and idle
mean that either. No, no. But anyway. What I discovered was that for some For girls of nine), O think what they have done,
reason people found me... peculiar. Of course I sensed it first from the boys And then run mad indeed: stark mad! for all
at boarding-school. But it was Father with his usual - his usual directness Thy by-gone fooleries were but spices of it.
and honestly who made me face it. I remember the day he said to me: 'Had That thou betraydst Polixenes, twas nothing;
you been born down there' - we were in the library and he pointed down to That did but show thee, of a fool, inconstant
Ballybeg - 'Had you been born down there, you'd have become the village idiot. And damnable ingrateful: nor wast much,
Fortunately for you, you were born here and we can absorb you.' Ha-ha. Thou wouldst have poisond good Camillos honour,
So at nine years of age I knew certain things: that certain kinds of people To have him kill a king; poor trespasses,
laughed at me; that the easy relationships that other men enjoy would always More monstrous standing by: whereof I reckon
elude me; that - that - that I would never succeed in life, whatever - you know - The casting forth to crows thy baby daughter,
whatever 'succeed' means. That was a very important and a very difficult To be or none or little: though a devil
discovery for me, as you can imagine. But it brought certain recognitions, Would have shed water out of fire, ere done t:
certain compensatory recognitions. Because once I recognised - once I Nor ist directly laid to thee the death
acknowledged that the larger areas were not accessible to me, I discovered - Of the young prince, whose honourable thoughts
I had to discover smaller, much smaller areas that were. Yes, indeed. And (Thoughts high for one so tender) cleft the heart
I discovered that if I conduct myself with some circumspection, I find that I That could conceive a gross and foolish sire
can live within these smaller, perhaps very confined territories without exposure Blemishd his gracious dam: this is not, no,
to too much hurt. Indeed I find that I can experience some happiness and Laid to thy answer: but the last - O lords,
perhaps give a measure of happiness, too. My great discovery. Isn't it so When I have said, cry woe! - the queen, the queen,
beautiful? The sweetst, dearst creatures dead: and vengance fort
Not droppd down yet.

Page 4 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 17
 FEMALE
The Art of Success
Nick Dear
Louisa:
Wind off the Thames blows down the avenues,
round the rotunda, through the triumphal arches and directly up
my skirt. I must have the coldest legs in England. A sailor in a
Bermondsey cellar said that in China they tell of a wind disease, a
cold, cold wind blowing round the body, typhoon in your arms and
legs, whispering draughts at the back of your skull. I told him I think
I've got it, mate, it all sounds dead familiar. He laughed and bit my
nipple with splintering teeth. What I would have loved, at that moment,
what I longed for, was that all the air would whoosh out of me like a
burst balloon, and I sink down to nothing at his feet, and teach the
disbelieving rat a lesson. Here I am out in all weathers, all the
entrances and exits in my body open to the elements day and freezing
night, what's to stop the gale when it comes in and fills me? And blows
round my bones for ever? - Wait, is he walking this way? That dragoon?
He looks so sad... doesn't he look sad... I don't know, they call this
place a pleasure garden, I've never seen such misery, I'd christen it
the garden of wind and disappointment, or cold and frosted cunt.
Page 16 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007
MALE
Wild Honey
Michael Frayn
Osip:
Hot summer's day. Like today. In the forest here. I'm going
along this track and I look round and there she is, she's standing
in a little stream and she's holding her dress up with one hand
and she's scooping up water in a dock leaf with the other. She scoops.
She drinks. Scoops. Drinks. Scoops again, and pours it over her head.
It's one of those days when you can feel the air heavy on you, and you
can't hear nothing but the buzzing of the flies... She pays no heed to me.
Just another peasant, she thinks. So I go down to the edge of the
stream, right close up to her, as close as I am to you now, and I just
look at her. Like this, like I'm looking at you. And she stands there in
the water in front of me, with her skirts up in her hand, and she bends,
she scoops, she pours. And the water runs over her hair, over her
face and her neck, then down over her dress, and all she says is:
'What are you staring at, idiot? Haven't you ever seen a human being
before?' And she scoops and she pours, and I just stand gazing.
Then suddenly she turns and gives me a sharp look. 'Oh,' she says,
'you've taken a fancy to me, have you?' And I say: 'I reckon I could kiss
you and die.' So that made her laugh. 'All right,' she says,
'you can kiss me if you like.' Well, I felt as if I'd been thrown into a furnace.
I went up to her - into the stream, boots and all, I didn't think twice - and
I took her by the shoulder, very lightly, and I kissed her right here, on her
cheek, and here on her neck, as hard as ever I could. 'Now, then,' she says,
'be off with you! And you wash a little more often', she says 'and you do
something about your nails!' And off I went.
School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 5
 MALE
Up The Road
John Harding
Ian:
Hey, brother, how do I look? Or have you been watching me for a while.
I never got to tell you about the places I've been or the people I've met. I've
travelled a bit. Went to Cooper Pedy, had a go at mining. First day on the
job I fell down a shaft and broke my arm. Decided mining wasn't for me.
Some way or other I ended up in Canberra. You used to Brylcreem my hair
for me. I used to love the way you'd grab my ears like motor cycle handles
and twist them. Vroom vroom. And that toy sheep we used to fight over.
I was just talking with Auntie about it. Had a bit of a blue with Susie.
She's been at my throat since I got back. They've all been having a go at me.
They reckon it's easy. But they've never been off the bloody mission.
They reckon I'm a coconut. She's a firey woman. It's bloody fresh up here,
isn't it? Those boots of yours keep you warm? I got a big electric heater
at home. I bought my own place now. What a whitefella, eh? A real house.
Double brick. And I'm the only one in it. Well, you got the family up here.
What've I got? I hate being alone. You all keep leaving me alone.
Mum, dad, you. Now Uncle Kenny's gonna be up here. Youse be fucking right.
What the fuck's going on? They're punishing me. Are you punishing me
too? I didn't want to leave, Nat. They all told me to go. They made me go
away. Not doing nothing. I fucking hated 'em. They did jack shit. Those
cops killed you and they did jack shit. Are you ashamed of me for that, my
brother? If it was me they'd killed, you would've rode your horse into
the fucken station and torn those cunts apart. That's what I wanted to
do. But they made me go away. I thought you were a king and they killed
you like a fucken dog. I'm sorry, Nat, I'm sorry. You knew I'd be back.
You knew I'd be back here with you. It's fresh, eh? I love you, Nat. I love
you brother. (sings) Amazing Grace how sweet the sound / that saved
a wretch like me / I once was lost but now I'm found / Was blind but now I see.
Page 6 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007
FEMALE
Three Sisters
Anton Chekhov
Translation by Michael Frayn
Irena:
Tell me, why is it I'm so happy today? Just as if I were sailing
along in a boat with big white sails, and above me the wide, blue
sky, and in the sky great white birds floating around? You know,
when I woke up this morning, and after I'd got up and washed, I
suddenly felt as if everything in the world had become clear to me,
and I knew the way I ought to live. I know it all now, my dear
Ivan Romanych. Man must work by the sweat of his brow whatever
his class, and that should make up the whole meaning and purpose
of his life and happiness and contentment. Oh, how good it must
be to be a workman, getting up with the sun and breaking stones
by the roadside - or a shepherd - or a schoolmaster teaching the
children - or an engine-driver on the railway. Good Heavens! It's
better to be a mere ox or horse, and work, than the sort of young
woman who wakes up at twelve, and drinks her coffee in bed, and
then takes two hours dressing... How dreadful! You know how
you long for a cool drink in hot weather? Well, that's the way I long
for work. And if I don't get up early from now on and really work,
you can refuse to be friends with me any more, Ivan Romanych.
School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 15
 FEMALE MALE
Wild Honey Measure for Measure Act II Scene ii
Michael Frayn William Shakespeare

Anna: Angelo:

How can you say that? How can you lie to me, on such a night as this, Whats this ? Whats this ? Is this her fault, or mine ?
beneath such a sky? Tell your lies in autumn, if you must, in the gloom The tempter, or the tempted, who sins most, ha ?
and the mud, but not now, not here. You're being watched! Look up, Not she; nor doth she tempt; but it is I
you absurd man! A thousand eyes, all shining with indignation! You must
That, lying by the violet in the sun,
be good and true, just as all this is good and true. Don't break this
silence with your little words! There's no man in the world I could ever
Do as the carrion does, not as the flower,
love as I love you. There's no woman in the world you could ever love Corrupt with virtuous season. Can it be
as you love me. Let's take that love; and all the rest, that so torments you - That modesty may more betray our sense
we'll leave that to others to worry about. Are you really such a terrible Than womans lightness? Having waste ground enough,
Don Juan? You look so handsome in the moonlight! Such a solemn face! Shall we desire to raze the sanctuary
It's a woman who's come to call, not a wild animal! All right - if you really And pitch our evils there? O fie, fie, fie!
hate it all so much I'll go away again. Is that what you want? I'll go away, What dost thou, or what art thou, Angelo?
and everything will be just as it was before. Yes...? (she laughs) Idiot! Dost thou desire her foully for those things
Take it! Snatch it! Seize it! What more do you want? Smoke it to the end, That make her good? O, let her brother live!
like a cigarette - pinch it out - tread it under your heel. Be human! You Thieves for their robbery have authority,
funny creature! A woman loves you - a woman you love - fine summer
When judges steal themselves. What, do I love her,
weather. What could be simpler than that? You don't realise how hard
life is for me. And yet life is what I long for. Everything is alive, nothing is
That I desire to hear her speak again?
ever still. We're surrounded by life. We must live, too, Misha! Leave And feast upon her eyes? What ist I dream on?
all the problems for tomorrow. Tonight, on this night of nights, we'll simply O cunning enemy, that, to catch a saint,
live! With saints dost bait thy hook! Most dangerous
Is that temptation that doth goad us on
To sin in loving virtue. Never could the strumpet
With all her double vigour, art and nature,
Once stir my temper: but this virtuous maid
Subdues me quite. Ever till now
When men were fond, I smild, and wonderd how.

Page 14 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 7
 MALE FEMALE
Julius Caesar Act I Scene ii Low Level Panic
William Shakespeare Claire McIntyre
Mary:
Cassius:
I know that virtue to be in you, Brutus,
As well as I do know your outward favour. Maybe if I'd been wearing trousers it wouldn't have happened.
Well, honour is the subject of my story. I was only wearing a skirt because I'd just come from work and
I cannot tell what you and other men it's the kind of place where they like you to wear a skirt, that or
Think of this life; but for my single self,
I had an lief not be as live to be smart trousers. Well, I haven't got any smart trousers so I have
In awe of such a thing as I myself. to wear a skirt. You're better off on a bike in trousers I know. It's
I was born free as Caesar; so were you; obvious. But it's not as if I was going on a marathon. It takes ten
We have both fed as well, and we can both minutes to cycle home at the outside. More like five. If that. I'm
Endure the winters cold as well as he:
not really comfortable on a bike in a skirt: it just makes people
For once, upon a raw and gusty day,
The troubled Tiber chafing with her shores, look at your legs. But who's around at that time of night to look?
Caesar said to me, Darst thou, Cassius, now Anyway I wasn't even on the bike: I was going to get on it. I was
Leap in with me into this angry flood, going to. It's not as if I was cycling along with my skirt up round
And swim to yonder point? Upon the word, my ears. I wasn't. I don't do silly things like that. I could have
Accoutred as I was, I plunged in
And bade him follow; so indeed he did. been getting into a car in a skirt. Would that have made a difference?
The torrent roard, and we did buffet it I could have cycled to work wearing a pair of jeans and had my skirt
With lusty sinews, throwing it aside folded up in one of the panniers but then it would have been all
And stemming it with hearts of controversy. squashed and that wouldn't have gone down well at all with the
But ere we could arrive the point proposd,
management. Or I could have come to work on the bicycle wearing
Caesar cried, Help me, Cassius, or I sink.
I, as Aeneas, our great ancestor, a skirt and could have changed into trousers to go home given that
Did from the flames of Troy upon his shoulder you're meant to be alright in the daylight but you're not safe at night.
The old Anchises bear, so from the waves of Tiber Or I could have walked to work and got a taxi home and I could have
Did I the tired Caesar. And this man worn whatever I liked. But I'd still have been there, on the edge of
Is now become a god, and Cassius is
A wretched creature, and must bend his body the road at midnight, about to get on my bicycle or into a car or just
If Caesar carelessly but nod on him. been stuck there waiting for a taxi whether I'd been in a skirt or not,
He had a fever when he was in Spain, whether I had good legs or not, whether I was fifteen or menopausal
And when the fit was on him, I did mark or lame, I'd still have been there.
How he did shake; tis true, this god did shake;
His coward lips did from their colour fly,
And that same eye whose bend doth awe the world
Did lose his lustre; I did hear him groan;
Ay, and that tongue of his, that bade the Romans
Mark him and write his speeches in their books,
Alas, it cried, Give me some drink, Titinius,
As a sick girl. Ye gods, it doth amaze me
A man of such a feeble temper should
So get the start of the majestic world,
And bear the palm alone.

Page 8 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 13
 FEMALE MALE
The Rain Dancers King Lear Act I Scene 2
Karin Mainwaring William Shakespeare

Kat: Edmund:
I was playing with Doug behind the tank-stand. We were bored. We were playing with a lizard we'd
found, dead, in the dust. We'd poked at it with sticks trying, I think, to worry the life back into it. All
Thou, Nature, art my goddess; to thy law
we'd done was worried the files out of it. It was full of them. There were ants too. They were going My services are bound. Wherefore should I
mad. Stand in the plague of custom, and permit
It was the weather... hot and still and humid. Everything was flat. Like the earth knew that a great
The curiosity of nations to deprive me?
weight of water was about to fall upon it. And the smell... as if the rain was coming, for it was, was a For that I am some twelve or fourteen moon shines
hand that held the earth in its palm, like an orange, squeezing it, fragrance spraying out like zest. Lag of a brother? Why bastard? Wherefore base?
The lizard was flat too. But that was the insects pulling its mass away from it. Doug and I knelt in the
When my dimensions are as well compact,
dust... sticks discarded and watched it... and from this frenzied fight for food came order... the soft bits My mind as generous and my shape as true
were triumphantly carted away first... then ants with big claw heads came to saw and rip away the As honest madams issue? Why brand they us
harder pieces.
With base? With baseness, Bastardy? Base, base?
We pretended we were ants and ate some. It was hard to see what they were getting so excited about. Who in the lusty stealth of nature take
Doug pretended a maggot was a witchetty grub. He ate it. I couldn't. More composition and fierce quality
And then it started to rain. Drops like maggots splattered around us lifting the dust into the air so that,
Than doth within a dull stale tired bed
for a second, the earth hovered under a red haze. Go to the creating of a whole tribe of fops
Got tween asleep and wake. Well, then,
I looked down the front of my dress, it was soaked, pink... voile I think. I remember it had a shirred
bust... not that I had one to shirr. I always thought that was something you did to eggs. You would not
Legitimate Edgar, I must have your land.
believe what I thought ladies had in their dresses. Mine had nothing but dead lizard stains smeared Our fathers love is to the bastard Edmund
across it. As to the legitimate. Fine word,'legitimate'!
My dress was wet. I could see my underpants. They were white, waisted Cottontails. Like these. Not
Well, my legitimate, if this letter speed
very sexy I admit. Although Mum tells me there are some dirty men who find the sight of grown women And my invention thrive, Edmund the base
in undies like these exciting. She calls this a fetish. She says they are perverts. They have a fixation. Shall top the legitimate. I grow, I prosper:
Doug had no such fixation. In fact he preferred me without any underpants at all. Like this. We both
Now gods, stand up for bastards!
thought this was very funny. Nobody else did.

The rain was fallling in sheets, like iron, slicing through the air. It was so much like being slapped that,
by the time I realised I was being slapped, it was too late to transmute the tears of joy that streamed
down my face to ones of sorrow.

And that was the last time I saw a man, boy, male until I saw you in the dirt outside.

Page 12 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 9
 MALE
The Taming of the Shrew
William Shakespeare
Petruchio:
Thus have I politicly begun my reign,
And tis my hope to end successfully.
My falcon now is sharp and passing empty;
And till she stoop she must not be full-gorged,
For then she never looks upon her lure.
Another way I have to man my haggard,
To make her come and know her keepers call,
That is, to watch her, as we watch these kites
That bate and beat and will not be obedient.
She eat no meat to-day, nor none shall eat;
Last night she slept not, nor to-night she shall not;
As with the meat, some undeserved fault
Ill find about the making of the bed;
And here Ill fling the pillow, there the bolster,
This way the coverlet, another way the sheets:
Ay, and amid this hurly I intend
That all is done in reverend care of her;
And in conclusion she shall watch all night:
And if she chance to nod Ill rail and brawl
And with the clamour keep her still awake.
This is a way to kill a wife with kindness;
And thus Ill curb her mad and headstrong humour.
He that knows better how to tame a shrew,
Now let him speak: tis charity to show.
Page 10 School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007
MALE
Act IV Scene i Romeo and Juliet Act 1 Scene 4
William Shakespeare
Mercutio:
O then I see Queen Mab hath been with you.
She is the fairies midwife, and she comes
In shape no bigger than an agate-stone
On the fore finger of an alderman,
Drawn with a team of little atomie
Over mens noses as they lie asleep.
Her chariot is an empty hazel-nut
Made by the joiner squirrel or old grub,
Time out o mind the fairies coachmakers.
Her wagon-spokes made of long spiders legs,
The cover of the wings of grasshoppers,
The traces of the smallest spinner's web,
Her collars of the moonshines watery beams,
Her whip of crickets bone, the lash of film,
Her wagoner a small grey-coated gnat,
Not half so big as a round little worm
Prickd from the lazy finger of a maid;
And in this state she gallops night by night
Through lovers brains, and then they dream of love;
Oer courtiers knees, that dream on courtsies straight,
Oer lawyers fingers who straight dream on fees,
Oer ladies lips, who straight on kisses dream,
Which oft the angry Mab with blisters plagues
Because their breaths with sweetmeats tainted are.
Sometime she gallops oer a courtiers nose,
And then dreams he of smelling out a suit;
And sometime comes she with a tithe-pigs tail
Tickling a parsons nose as a lies asleep;
Then dreams he of another benefice.
Sometime she driveth oer a soldiers neck
And then dreams he of cutting foreign throats,
Of breaches, ambuscadoes, Spanish blades,
Of healths five fathom deep; and then anon
Drums in his ear, at which he starts and wakes,
And being thus frighted swears a prayer or two
And sleeps again. This is that very Mab
That plats the manes of horses in the night
And bakes the elflocks in foul sluttish hairs,
Which, once untangled, much misfortune bodes.
This is the hag, when maids lie on their backs,
That presses them and learns them first to bear,
Making them women of good carriage.
This is she -
School of Drama Student Audition Monologue Booklet for 2007 Page 11