The Philosophy of Love

through the Eyes of

Sren Kierkegaard

Philosophy 1010
Tuesday at 5:30 8:20 p.m.
November 28, 2017
By: Kenzie Baxter

https://theanswermyfriendisblowininthewind.weebly.com/
 "One must believe in love; otherwise one will never become aware that it exists."

Sren Kierkegaard authored Works of Love, he starts by explaining the necessity of

believing in love. To give way to fear of deceit and believe that love exists. Kierkegaard explains

that believing something that is untrue is to be deceived such is to disbelieve something that is

true. "To cheat oneself out of love is the most terrible deception."

The cornerstone of love is self-love, but the foundation of love is the Love of

God. Without self-love no other love can exist; yet without God, no love can exist. Kierkegaard

wrote "Therefor it is not said: "Thou shalt love God as thyself," but rather, "Thou shalt love the

Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy soul, and all thy mind." A man should love God in

unconditional obedience and love him in adoration."" To show love to God is to obey his word.

He says "All you have to do is to obey in love."

While observing obedience you must love thy neighbor as thyself. Kierkegaard asks

'Who, then, is one's neighbour?' The word neighbor is derived from the Old German word

neahgebur meaning near-dweller. How do we interpret this phrase; near-dweller? Near in

proximity? Near in education? Near in ideals? Or near in heart? To Sren Kierkegaard we must

decipher this as Christ does with the Parable of the merciful Samaritan.

Explaining the story of the fallen man, who was robbed, being passed by a priest and a
 Levite (a member of the Hebrew tribe of Levi, often known to be aide to the priests); was

finally recovered by a Samaritan. Christ then asks "Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was

neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves?" (Luke 10:36) Answering "He that shewed

mercy on him." Jesus then directs us saying "Go, and do thou likewise." Remembering

Kierkegaard's idea; 'All you have to do is to obey in love.'

"Choosing a lover, finding a friend, yes, that is a long, hard job, but one's neighbour is easy to

recognise, easy to find -- if one himself will only recognise his duty."

To Sren Kierkegaard your neighbors are those whom you have a duty to; those who are

in need of mercy. Finding those people who are in need of what you have is your task and giving

them what you can is your duty. Not to say that loving your neighbor is to neglect your friends

and loves ones which you are not currently duty-bound. But to put into action the idea to Love

God above all else and then love your neighbour and in your neighbour every man.

In discussing types of love, Kierkegaard discusses Love of God, love of neighbors, love

of friends, and what he refers to as erotic love. His phrase 'erotic love' would be in line with what

we call romantic love. Sren writes "Erotic love is still not eternal; it is the beautiful giddiness of

infinity; its highest expression is the rashness of riddles." He believes that erotic love should be

faithful, while loving thy neighbor, the love is blind attitude should still be in place when it

comes to your erotic love. You can, and should, fulfill your duty to love every man while

wearing blinders blocking all those that are not your erotic love from view; leaving you faithful

and committed to them. He makes a strong distinction between You and I and Yours and Mine.
Explaining that you cannot have Yours and Mine in erotic love and you must have You and I.

You and I are individuals, with individual needs and wants. Yours and Mine are self-serving and

have no place in an erotic love. Kierkegaard says " When mine has become yours and yours

mine, there are indeed a mine and a yours everywhere... Through the exchange the contentious

mine and yours have become a communal mine and yours... Since mine and yours exchanged

and become Ours, in which category friendship and erotic love have their strength, they are

strong at least in this." He finds there to be strength in the OURS mentality. It is not self-serving,

it creates a more open space for trust to fill without jeopardizing each persons individuality.

Although, Sren Kierkegaard believes erotic love and friendship to come behind both the

love of God and the love of thy neighbor, he writes "erotic love is undeniably life's most happy

fortune and friendship the greatest temporal good." He described the exchange of rings that

happens in erotic love to be a very fitting gesture for that type of love, but finds it to be a poor

symbol of love. The rings symbolizing that which the OURS mentality has already given us. A

true symbol of love, as seen by Kierkegaard is an act of love; a work of love.

"When it is a duty in loving to love the men that we see, There is no limit to love. If the

duty is to be fullfilled, the love must be timeless. It is unchanged, no matter how the object

becomes changed." While understanding that love is limitless we must understand that includes

loving people for who they are, not who we see them as. Loving a person for who they are in

each moment in contrast to loving them for the potential we see in them. As humans, we have a

tendency to love the people in our lives for what they plan to accomplish and the potential we see

them having. That is not true love, to truly love another you must not only love them for who
they could become but also for the person they have been and who they are in this moment.

Kierkegaard paints this idea with the relationship between Christ and Peter. Peter, in life's most

pivotal moment, denies his friend. Betrayed by his friend; we would anticipate Christ to be

offended, to be hurt. This is not what occurred. He was sorrowful for his friend. He was

concerned about the well-being of the man who just sealed his fate. He does not ignore Peter but

instead looks at him with eyes of concern. Our nature is to harbor feelings of disdain for those

who have crossed us, but "Christ's love for Peter was so boundless that in loving Peter he

accomplished loving the person one sees." Kierkegaard writes "He did not say, "Peter must

change first and become another man before I can love him again." No, just the opposite, he said,

"Peter is peter, and I love him; love, if anything, will help him to become another man.""

LOVE BUILDS UP. To love someone is to build them up. If we are honest in loving

every man, we are building them up. Love does not tear one another down, it does not start

rumors, it does not treat with disrespect, it is not resentful; love builds up. When one truly feels

love they feel uplifted. Love carries misunderstandings, it forgives unwarranted anger.

Whatever the world takes away from you, though it be the most cherished, whatever happens to

you in life, however you may have to suffer because of your striving, for the good, if you please,

if men turn indifferent from you or as enemies against you, if no one is willing to admit

acquaintance with you or acknowledge what he nevertheless owes you, if even your best friend

should deny you if nevertheless in any of your strivings, in any of your actions, in any of your

words you truly have consciously had love along: then take comfort, for love abides. For Sren

Kierkegaard, no matter where life takes us, the trials that we face, love will abide.
 Understanding Kierkegaards ideas of love is to know that love is rooted in God.

Knowing that all love comes from the love of God and the love we have for God. Stemming

from there is self-love; to truly love another is to love oneself. You must have self-appreciation

and love to share that with others. Once we have that self-love we must love our neighbors as

ourselves. We are duty-bound to those in need of what we have to give. To love our neighbors,

or everyman, we must not neglect our friends and our erotic love. See them as they are and love

them for that. Because love builds up, we must find ways to build up those we love. There is

enough darkness in the world around us; we must stand as a beacon of light for those around us.

Giving those we love brightness from this dark, and allow them to feel our warmth in the cold

world surrounding us.

Nevertheless, love abides. With all of the pain and hurt in this world, we still inhabit a

world created from love, therefor love will abide. When nothing seems to go right in life, when it

feels as though slipping into the darkness would go unnoticed, Kierkegaard says tis not so. Love

will abide. Because God is a God of Love, this world will always have love. Knowing that love

exists is enough for there to continue to be love. Often to feel love all that is needed is to show

love. Building a fire in anothers heart is enough to warm our own. By carrying out our duty to

love another, by works of love, we are showing love and obedience to God in whom will always

be love, for love abides.