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Medha Mayawala

Timothy Erickson

English 1010

May 16, 2014

To compete or not to compete?

Can competition really help build a child’s character?

Do sports help build a child’s character? Does it make a child stronger; a better

individual? A well- rounded person? Or an egotistical individual who is only concerned about

winning no matter what the stakes are. What’s your opinion? This is a question that has been

debated and discussed for decades. A lot of people agree with the fact that participating in sports

can help build a child’s character. They believe that sports, whether it’s a team sport or

individual sport, teach children valuable life lessons like team spirit, dedication and loyalty. They

see sports as an educational tool for their kids and encourage the kids to participate, learn and

prosper from. On the other hand there are a lot of people who do not support the idea of their

children participating in any kind of competitions at all. They believe sports promote bad

behavior, selfish attitudes and don’t want their children to develop these negative traits.

Whether positive or negative, sports can play a big role in an individual’s life. They help

build a child’s character by teaching them the importance of hard work, teamwork, and not give

up easily even when the odds are against them. These characteristics are very important even as

the kids grow up, they realize that it takes time and effort in order to reach important goals in life

. Through teamwork they learn to work with others and this can prepare them as they grow older,

get jobs, and progress in their careers. Another thing it teaches them is to keep persevering even
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when things may seem impossible. This is something that everyone has to face as they grow up,

and continue facing as they are adults.

All of these physical attributes are necessary for an individual, but competition doesn’t

just benefit someone in a physical aspect; it can also be helpful in building an individual’s

confidence and self-esteem. At some point or another, everyone’s confidence has or will be at an

all-time low, but people learn to overcome it in a way that shows everyone that they’re able to do

something great, and competition in sports can accomplish that for kids. Kids can always use a

confidence booster, and by making decisions kids gain confidence faster, than getting a trophy,

showing they accomplished something. Through competition they’re able to gain confidence

when they make a basket or goal; they’re able to prove themselves. Just like their confidence,

their self-esteem can also be affected. Competitions can raise a kid’s self-esteem every time that

kid does something good. They learn to be proud of themselves, and gain more self-respect as

they see themselves improving and becoming more successful (Engle).

According to Karen Coffin, author from the National Federation of State High School

Associations magazine, competition is a good thing. It challenges us and makes us aware of how

well we perform under pressure. Competition brings out the best in us and teaches us

commitment, focus, and the ability to work well with others, which instills the quality to

constantly improve. Kids get motivated, determined, and willing to work hard. They learn about

the benefits of hard work at an early age and learn that in order to succeed it is important that

they stay committed to their goal. It teaches them to perform better under pressure, which is great

to learn at an early age because it prepares them for challenges as they grow older (Coffin).

While many adults believe in this idea that their child is learning when competing in

school or sports, some disagree. The reason for their disagreement is that they feel competition
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is not a good learning experience, because it promotes joy at the expense of others downfall.

Competition by definition means where one succeeds and rest fail so how can it be good, they

say. It is bound to be bad. They believe that it ruins kids’ self- esteem and confidence at a very

early age. Or if they win they will become egotistic, arrogant, over confident, and patronizing

towards other kids, accepting the fact that you are worth as much as you accomplish. They don’t

want the kids to feel that they are as good or get better depending on how many people they’ve

beaten (Kohn).

Some adults feel they are protecting their children by not wanting them to participate in

competitions, because they think it can be destructive and harmful. These parents believe that by

doing so they are protecting their children and hopefully avoiding a whole negative situation. It

is possible these parents and adults are being too soft on their kids, thus teaching children to

believe that winning doesn't matter, and this will not prepare them for their future. There’s

competition all around us and people competing all the time, whether a promotion or a college

scholarship. If children aren’t taught the importance of competition at an early age, they are

going to have a hard time, trying to keep up with others around them, later on in life. Teaching

children that “winning and losing is all the same” is not teaching them to do their best. Parents

should provide their kids with the necessary tools to succeed in life and by allowing them to

participate in competitions gives them confidence to take on challenges in life.

In an interview with Marianne Engle, PhD, sports psychologist and Clinical Assistant

Professor at the NYU Child Study Center, discusses competition and how it is something that

keeps children from getting too comfortable in one spot; instead it keeps them wanting to

improve themselves. This results in the improvement of the quality of their work. This also

makes them want to learn from their mistakes and focus more on their flaws to achieve goals in
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life and succeed. Dedication and focus they learn early in life can lead to their success later in

life. When kids compete they are ready to explore and they are not afraid, which opens up more

possibilities for them. By taking part in competitions they are able to take chances and learn on

their own. Without competition like this, progress can come to a standstill. Not competing and

being pleased with how they are can hold someone back from their full potential. The foundation

of most life skills are set in childhood and competition is one of those skills. It is connected to so

many other positive life skills such as cooperation, teamwork, social skills, hard work, focus and

treating people with fairness.

Cynthia Johnson, a professor at North Carolina State University, published an article

discussing competition and how among kids it can provide a better understanding on the concept

of winning and losing without having the ill feeling against each other. It can teach them to learn

how to be a good competitor and how to use past losses as a learning tool to improve. It can also

increase your physical coordination and your mental abilities. Giving you the ability to think and

perform under pressure and learn to solve problems

It is understandable to think that your child can be negatively affected through

competition. It is also unfair to put the entire blame on the activity that kids participate in or

because of the competition and the desire to win rather than losing. The results of competition

should be positive, adults should not try to influence the children with their opinion about

competition, instead let them form their own views .It can come down to the coach or even the

parents themselves, because of how they portray competition and their negative actions can

shape the children’s thoughts. The kids learn from what they see, so it is unfair to blame the

negative effects of competition on the activity and competition itself. If people see competition
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as a bad thing for their kids, they shouldn’t teach them to avoid it. Instead, teach them what they

learn from it and how it can make them better.

Another way competition is useful to kids is to be involved in a group, a team, or an

organization. It’s important for kids to be involved in a group, because everyone wants the sense

of being important and wanted, especially young kids. The aspect of being on a team is

something that teaches kids to do their part and be responsible enough to do their job and

accomplish them. Also teaching them to work together and trusting each other to accomplish the

same goals is an important life skill. A recent article discussing children and their ability to work

together, explained the benefits. It mentioned many positive outcomes such as, social skills,

literacy skills, and positive results from having the sense to be wanted (Work Together).

A lesson to be learned through sports could be to press forward, and know the fact that

we didn’t fail, we just found a way that doesn’t work. We remember that and move on to the

next possible way. The result of this competition lets a child know how they face life and its

challenges. For example, in sports people learn to push themselves physically, emotionally, and

mentally. Let’s break this down: physically we grow stronger, which is a result from hard work

in the gym or on the field. This can teach a kid that the reward we get from our effort or hard

work can be a bigger and better. Mentally, we see from pushing ourselves further that we have

before and preparing ourselves to overcome our own faults. Imagine we are playing in the U. S

Open, leading by one stroke, and being challenged by competitor that’s nipping at our heels. In

this situation, a strong and mentally prepared player calms himself down, takes a deep breath,

sees a shot that is needed, and executes. That’s what separates someone who has competed and

learned beforehand how to handle stressing a competitive environment and someone who has

been taught to avoid it. This can be relatable to every aspect of life not just sports. For example
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even professionals such as doctors, pilots, and engineers deal with stress and anxiety better if

they have learnt to deal with it at an earlier age rather than having to deal with it later on in their

careers. Lastly, emotions, they can get the best of anyone. It can be anger, doubt or even lack of

confidence. Whatever it may be, we must know how to deal with them. Carson Barrett, sports

manager, discusses how competition can teach us how to deal with all of these. A lot of times

people only see the physical aspects that competition brings and forget it can improve us

mentally as well. It boosts their self confidence and as a result they are more attentive in class

and able to grasp more academically and in other areas of their life.

Look at peer pressure. In some cases it’s a very bad and negative thing. It has made

people feel horrible, but sometimes it can help. In the right way and around the right people it

can help someone to see that maybe that they need to change some of their habits, work ethics,

and improve their own abilities. A child who is constantly around members of a team can see

this. Watching friends and opponents improving and doing what needs to be done to improve can

influence kids to do more. Kids are always having competitions with one another, whether it’s

just a race to see who can get to the dinner table first or who can get the better test score. It

makes them want to work harder than the person next to them to improve and better themselves.

Ideas like these are going to stay with them throughout their adult years. They will know that in

order to achieve something, they will have to work harder than the person next to them.

Competition can teach children to achieve what they never thought was achievable.

If we look back how competition had started and how they became popular; you might think

about the Olympics and the Greeks. Also, it was the Spartans and the Vikings who started to

train at a very early age for these competitions of survival. These were tough competitions where

only the strongest could survive. Over time this continued, and the fighting competitions brought
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out the best in them. The most capable warriors won and were depended on to protect their cities,

when needed. These competitions prepared them from the earliest time in their life as skilled

warriors and a formidable team. Even though most times they were outnumbered by their

enemies, they were able to hold their own because they worked and trained together as a team.

This was possible, because as children they competed against each other, learning to lean on one

another, thus improving their individual character. Due to these competitions they were able to

accomplish great things in life, enabling them to succeed in life as they grew older and

accomplished things that once seemed impossible

All these positive characteristics are great for kids, and can really help them progress in

life. In addition to the above-mentioned characteristics, studies have proven that children who

participate in endurance sports and competitions had enhanced brain development and an

increased IQ. They develop qualities like perseverance, hard work and working through

obstacles. These qualities are ingrained in their character and help them in other aspects of their

life. If they encounter difficult situations in life, they don’t quit; they keep trying. For example in

order to play on the team, kids have to maintain a certain grade point average; so instead of just

giving up they work hard and maintain their grades. This makes them responsible students as

well (Chessman).

Payne, Fernando, and Lancaster, authors of the book “Beyond Winning: Smart Parenting

in a Toxic Sports Environment”, believe that too much pressure on the kids can take the fun out

of the activities they are in. One example is when kids come back from a game. Instead of asking

how their experience was, the question usually asked is “Did you win?” or “How many did you

score?” The message that comes across to the children is that winning at all costs is important.

They make the child who scored the most points is the most important, instead of acknowledging
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all the kids and the effort they put in. The children feel the pressure, because coaches stress the

importance of winning games; slowly all the weak players are weeded out and the players who

stay on the team spend most of their time practicing. They have no time left for any other

activities in their life. The end result is that the players have so much pressure that they end up

disliking the very game they enjoyed playing.

This is one of the main reasons why some parents believe that competition is bad for their

child. They think that their children will get pushed too much and won’t be able to enjoy the

game and soon will get tired of it. This is true. A lot of times children get burned out by a sport,

because they are told to focus on winning rather than enjoying the game and having fun. If

parents believe this will happen to their child then they should teach their kids to have fun, rather

than concentrating on winning. They still need to let them participate and compete, because they

need the experience. Participating in competitions not only is a source of amusement, but also

shapes their character and personality.

Competition is beneficial for children and even adults. It can help teach many life

lessons. It can be associated with some of the best characteristics wanted in a child as they grow

up. It can make them a well-rounded individual and teach them how to deal with life situations.

More importantly, it can make them a better person. Their overall character develops for the

better and people can witness this through their everyday life and the actions they make.

Competition can change them for positive or negative, depending on the individuals’

perspectives and the influence around them. If some adults believe it brings negativity and bad

attitude, then they should do something to make it a more positive experience for their children.

Parents and the coaches that influence a child’s life need to teach their kids the correct attitude

towards competition, how to deal with a loss, and how to react to a win. They need to teach the
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children good sportsmanship and how to deal with everything as it comes. Sometimes it may be

hard, but they need to learn.

It’s not always easy, but it is necessary. How we learn to cope with the results start from

here, and these habits develop at an early age. In the end it’s up to the individual and how they

choose to present themselves. Competition is just a way for these children to learn. It depends on

the children and if they want to make this learning experience or just be there as a spectator to

those who are taking full advantage of what they are being taught. Competition can help develop

a child’s character for the better; it just takes effort and positive influence.
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Works Cited

Barrett, Carson. "How Does Playing Sports Affect Your

Health?"Http://healthyliving.azcentral.com/. Demand Media, n.d. Web.

Chessman, Kristin. "Organized Sports are a Home Run." N.p., 31 Mar. 2014. Web.

Coffin, Karen. "Competition – Good or Bad?." National Federation of State High School

Associations, n.d. Web.

Engle, Marianne. "Sports and kids: Pathway to healthy development or to unhealthy

competition?." N.p., 1 Jan. 2004. Web.

Engle, Marianne. "Kids and Sports: Creating a Healthy Experience for Every Child." . N.p., 1

Sept. 2004. Web.

Johnson, Cynthia. "Children and Competition." . North Carolina Cooperative Extension Service,

1 May 1993. Web.

Johnston, Charles. "The Training of a Young Viking." Our Little Viking Cousins. : Nabu Press,

2011. . Print.

Kohn, Alfie. “No Contest: The Case Against Competition .” . 2nd ed. Boston: Houghton Mifflin,

1992. Print.

Payne, Kim, Luis Llosa, and Scott Lancaster. “Beyond Winning: Smart Parenting in a Toxic

Sports Environment.” . Guilford: Lyons Press, 2013. Print.

"Work Together." Scholastic.com. Scholastic, n.d. Web.

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