Sample text A

Teenagers these days are far more sophisticated than those in the past. The law should recognize
this. In a recent survey, some people suggested that the age for being responsible for a crime
should be dropped to eight years old. This, I feel, is too young. Fourteen, however, is too old. Is
there anyone who believes that a fourteen-year-old does not know that it is against the law to
steal or vandalise property? By the age of twelve, children are aware of what is legal and what is
not. (89 words)

Teenagers these days are far more sophisticated than those in the past. The law should recognize
this. In a recent survey, some people suggested that the age for being responsible for a crime
should be dropped to eight years old. This, I feel, is too young. Fourteen, however, is too old. Is
there anyone who believes that a fourteen-year-old does not know that it is against the law to
steal or vandalise property? By the age of twelve, children are aware of what is legal and what is
not. (89 words)`

Sample text B
Two hundred Australians died from electrocution last year.
Don’t let a family member become a statistic. Show them you care. Buy a Stopshock
safety switch; otherwise, risk the death of a loved one.
Stopshock safety switches are the best on the market and can be installed in minutes.
A Stopshock safety switch is a must; so get one now.
(Anderson & Anderson, 1997b:124)

Two hundred Australians died from electrocution last year.

Don’t let a family member become a statistic. Show them you care. Buy a Stopshock
safety switch; otherwise, risk the death of a loved one.
Stopshock safety switches are the best on the market and can be installed in minutes.
A Stopshock safety switch is a must; so get one now.

1
Sample text C
In Australia, there are three levels of government, the federal government, state
governments, and local governments. All of these levels of government are necessary. This is so
for a number of reasons.
First, the federal government is necessary for the big things. They keep the economy in
order and look after things like defence.
Similarly, the state governments look after the middle sized things. For example, they
look after law and order, preventing things like vandalism in schools.
Finally, local governments look after the small things. They look after things, like
collecting rubbish, otherwise everyone would have diseases.
Thus, for the reasons above, we can conclude that the three levels of government are
necessary. (114 words)

In Australia, there are three levels of government, the federal government, state
governments, and local governments. All of these levels of government are necessary. This is so
for a number of reasons.
First, the federal government is necessary for the big things. They keep the economy in
order and look after things like defence.
Similarly, the state governments look after the middle sized things. For example, they
look after law and order, preventing things like vandalism in schools.
Finally, local governments look after the small things. They look after things, like
collecting rubbish, otherwise everyone would have diseases.
Thus, for the reasons above we can conclude that the three levels of government are
necessary. (114 words)
(Gerot & Wignell, 1994:198-199)

2
Sample text B

In all the discussion over the removal of lead from petrol (and the atmosphere) there
doesn’t seem to have been any mention of the difference between driving in the city and the
country.
While I realise my leaded petrol car is polluting the air wherever I drive, I feel that when
you travel through the country, where you only see another car every five to ten minutes, the
problem is not as severe as when traffic is concentrated on city roads.
Those who want to penalise older, leaded petrol vehicles and their owners don’t seem to
appreciate that, in the country, there is no public transport to fall back upon and one’s own
vehicle is the only way to get about.
I feel that the country people, who often have to travel huge distances to the nearest town
and who already spend a great deal of money on petrol, should be treated differently to the
people who live in the city. (161 words)

(The Road Ahead, 1993:24 cf. Gerot & Wignell, 1994:211)

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Modified sample A

Issues or In Indonesia, there are three levels of education namely Explicit

thesis primary education, secondary education and tertiary education. statement of
Regardless people’s chances and affordability, all of these a stance or
levels are necessary. This is so for a number of reasons. a position
Argument #1 First, the primary education or elementary education Point
provides basic education.
It basically presents necessary life skills such as basic literacy Elaboration
and basic counting.
Argument #2 Similarly, the secondary education or high school Point
provides advanced basic education.
For example, junior high schools present more complex and Elaboration
more advanced literacy and mathematic operations. Senior high
schools provide rather specific knowledge and skills; they
depend on the after-graduation orientation of the students.
When they want to continue their study to higher education,
they are recommended to take a general high school. Whereas
those who want to get immediate job, they are recommended to
take a vocational school.
Argument #3 Finally, the tertiary education can be in forms of Point
universities, institutes, colleges, and polytechnics.
It provides more specialized disciplines such as education, Elaboration
technics, medicines, sciences, and humanities. Universities
serve more general disciplines; the disciplines may vary from
one university to another. Meanwhile, institutes, colleges, and
polytechnics serve more specific disciplines such as institute of
teacher training, college of administration, and polytechnic of
industrial engineering.
Reiteration Thus, for the reasons above, we can conclude that the Restatement
three levels of education are necessary. (215 words) of the thesis

4
Modified sample B

In all the discussion over the preference of final paper writers there doesn’t seem to have
been any mention of the difference between writing final paper and taking substitute courses.
While I realize that taking substitute course spends less efforts, energy, and time span, I
feel that you attend the courses with limited number of meetings and resources. In the meetings,
you only fulfil few course requirements with minimum guidance. There are only quite a few
resources as well. The problem is they are not as specific and extensive as writing final papers
when the writers are expected to spend more time to meet their thesis advisors for consultations,
to search for additional resources on the topic of their choice, and to work on the final paper
writing before and after feedback provision from their thesis advisors.
Those who want to take substitute courses, both the courses required and the course
attendants are limited in time and resources to develop their capacity and specific skills
compared to writing final papers. They may find inadequate opportunity to develop their
knowledge and skills which develop their capacity, creativity, and innovation for their future
career.
I feel that the final paper writers, who often have to spend more efforts, energy, and time
span should be treated differently to those who prefer to be substitute-course takers. (220 words)

5
Modified sample text B

In all the discussion over the preference of final paper writers there doesn’t seem to have
been any mention of the difference between writing final paper and taking substitute courses.
While I realize that taking substitute course spends less efforts, energy, and time span, I
feel that you attend the courses with limited number of meetings and resources. In the meetings,
you only fulfil few course requirements with minimum guidance. There are only quite a few
resources as well. The problem is they are not as specific and extensive as writing final papers
when the writers are expected to spend more time to meet their thesis advisors for consultations,
to search for additional resources on the topic of their choice, and to work on the final paper
writing before and after feedback provision from their thesis advisors.
Those who want to take substitute courses, both the courses required and the course
attendants are limited in time to develop their capacity and specific skills compared to writing
final papers. They may find inadequate opportunity to develop their knowledge and skills which
develop their capacity, creativity, and innovation for their future career.
I feel that the final paper writers, who often have to spend more efforts, energy, and time
span should be treated differently to those who prefer to be substitute-course takers. (220 words)