____________________________________________________
These are non sequitur surreal verses written by Adi Cox in the
style of prose poetry. Each verse is one dream that has been
written down to the best of my ability.
CONTENT.
Spring Chapters
March 2018 --- verses 1-28
April 2018 --- verses 29-55
May 2018 --- verses 56-100
Summer Chapters
June 2018 --- verses 101-132
July 2018 --- verses 133- 182
August 2018 --- verses 183 - 233
Autumn Chapters
September --- verses 234 -
October --- verses
November --- verses
Winter Chapters
December --- verses
January --- verses
February --- verses
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March 2018
____________________________________________________
This is the beat of the Manchester Rave scene. This is the beat of
the Techno Dream. To which at our late age, we pick ourselves up
and then we throw ourselves around.
2-3-18
There are two almost identical phone numbers. Except one ends
in one four zero and the other ends in one three five. I am looking
at these numbers but I do not know who they are.
3-3-18
4-3-18
6-3-18
8-3-18
9-3-18
10-3-18
(8) Making Work.
It is as if there is no gravity. Toby is up on the ceiling touching up
the bumpy white wallpaper that has been pasted up there on the
ceiling and then emulsioned over with white paint. This is the
show piece to get more work and so the work must be done good.
12-3-18
(9) A While.
Me and my dad are sat in the lounge. In comes my sister Maz.
"Come on you're not sitting there!" She says to us.
I get myself to the bottom of the stairs and tell Maz. "You are not
allowed upstairs. You cannot get past me. I will not let you." And I
poke her in her stomach just to make a point.
Later on Mum and Maz are sat outside in deck chairs soaking up
the summer sun. I go up to them and I give them an ice cream
pastie. "Oh thanks." They respond to my generosity in chorus,
grateful for their treat.
"And here's one for me." I finalise, to make it clear that we all
have our pasties.
"I'm not getting off this chair." He states, just before I grab the
cushion and hit the cat on its back with it. To which the cat then
jumps off the deck chair in a hurry with its black fur all fluffed up.
So now I join Maz and mum sat outside in the sun with an ice
cream pastie and we all while our time away in this glorious
sunshine as we each tuck into our pasties.
13-3-18
(10) An Event.
It is all a bit crazy. If the emergency services get you then you have
had it. I have got myself out onto the top road with a roller of
flares that I drag around with me. There are flares being used all
over and the smoke is drifting around making it difficult to see.
There are people here who take action, who know exactly what
they are doing. Quickly I hear a man and his commentary. I watch
him. He is calm, focused and nifty, as he gets himself across the
top road and then onto the wasteland. I was in two minds, but
then I decide to keep myself on this wasteland out of the way,
because if the emergency services take charge of me then I have
lost my freedom.
14-3-18
My sister Maz is cooking. "We've only got one first course and four
puddings." She tells me jokingly as she laughs.
"I will need another pudding then Maz." I tell her in response
furthering on the joke. She hands me a plate with Cheese 'n' chips
'n' salad cream and as I eat the chips I imagine what the puddings
could be.
16-3-18
(12) Inexplicable.
I am travelling on the bus and you can get rewards back. I have
been looking around, working it all out. I meet someone and tell
them about my position and about the rewards that I have
accrued. It takes skill and you have to know what you are doing
here. It is all a bit vague and you can get lost in the abstract. There
is so much more to all of this than what I am telling you, but it has
all gone now. Lost in a fogginess. Some of my thoughts are left
behind. There are thoughts that I have lost in my memory almost
immediately. There are subtleties that cannot be expressed here, I
am sure about that.
17-3-18
"How much money would it cost you to travel by land from China
to Norway if it costs £20 to travel in each country that you go
through?"
18-3-18
(15) As We Dance.
I miss my girl and I sing this song:
"Do you like that helmet?" I am asked by someone who has just
joined me in a dance.
"Yes I do." I reply having forgotten that I was wearing a helmet and
then we dance the night away.
We all decide to go out of the pub. I step outside, then the door
step grows ten feet high. "Do not worry, we will be able to get
back in." I am reassured that I will be able to get back into the pub
later to collect my belongings. She has a brass key that will lower
the step, you see.
19-3-18
20-3-18
There are two foreign girls in this shop now. I know which girl I like
the best, but they both admire this man who I do not know, but I
watch them. I see the girls react to this man and so I know that
both of these girls, they adore him.
The two foreign girls are in competition with each other for the
attention of this man. I know which girl I like, but I just spectate. I
am not a party to what is going on. I am not privy to their
affections. I just watch from a distance detached, but I know
which girl I like.
21-3-18
These pipes are not quite right as I fit them together. I wait
patiently to get some attention, but my waiting is in vain. That
woman is here and she is taking up my time. She is wasting all of
my time. So then ultimately and unavoidably I am sidelined into
insignificance, as I stand there patiently with my light grey plastic
pipe dreams in my hands. I just stand there.
24-3-18
(22) My Imposition.
I am jamming with this bloke. We are both on acoustic guitars. He
has these chords that he plays with this rhythm and I find a few
notes that sound good to it. I make a little tune to his rhythm
guitar.
"Do you want to make that song an instrumental?" I ask him keen
to use his playing for the little tune that I have made up to go
along with his guitar playing.
"No, I have some words that go with that song." He tells me which
stops me dead in my tracks with my idea for an instrumental.
25-3-18
I cannot believe that all of these chocolate bars have been eaten
by the same person. Not eaten by me, but eaten by a woman who
is called Paula. She likes her chocolate bars a lot. There is a lot of
information here that I go through written on card. On the
packaging that I shuffle through and deal with and read all about.
This is a big deal. Yes, she likes her chocolate bars a lot.
28-3-18
(25) Barbara.
I am a barber as I watch her wake up in the barbers' chair. I
wonder about her dream. I wonder how far she has been gone in
her dream. How deep did she go? I make a conscious effort to
evaluate this. I look at her mood, her predisposition and I gauge
her as she slowly comes round. As she comes round sat in the
barbers' chair.
29-3-18
30-3-18
(27) My Silence.
They fall through the gaping holes in the road. I push one of them.
I find a convenient time. I tap his back foot from behind him as he
is walking along and as he trips up I push him hard on his back to
make sure that he falls. He grabs hold of another person as he is
falling down and they both fall down through the holes in this
road that they walk down.
This road is made up of circular aluminium grey discs that you can
stand on. Some of these circular discs are joined together, but in
between these discs is an emptiness where the road can swallow
you up. There are two people missing because of me and I tell no
one. There is an investigation into the disappearance of these two
missing people, but I keep my mouth shut. I keep my silence.
31-3-18
____________________________________________________
April 2018
____________________________________________________
1-4-18
2-4-18
4-4-18
6-4-18
(33) I Laugh : O
There is a man with a brolly. (I laugh) "I know he has been doing
that all day. I do not know what he thinks he is doing!" Says a
voice from out of the clear of the blue.
For some reason it is funny. A man with a brolly brisk and gay
walking along with nothing to say. (I laugh) But I do not know why
that is funny, but it is.
7-4-18
GORILLA
<(o)> <(o)>
\/\-----------/\/
8-4-18
I have some stuff in the fridge but I need a number code to get
into it. I notice that someone else puts the code into the fridge
and then they get inside. So I quickly glance at the fridge code that
is written on the inside of the open fridge door. I am aware that
this bloke is watching me. I know that he knows what I am doing
as I read off the number to myself, I am struggling to memorise
this long digit number.
9-4-18
(37) My Deception.
We are setting up a disco function. I have got jobs to do, but I am
not sure what it is that they want me to do. I do not even know
who this do is for. I would not recognise him if I saw him.
There is a man walking around with one foot and a small hard hat
on. He looks like a shoe with a small hard hat on top. He gets
around though. I stop to talk to him for a while to see if I can get
any ideas of what I should be doing here. I tell him what he looks
like. His hard hat moves up and down when he talks to me. He
makes me smile.
11-4-18
Next there is a herd of white hobbie horses who come out from
nowhere. Hundreds of them in and out of driveways. They migrate
across this neighbourhood with their white manes flopping
around as they move along and all the rich and famous people are
hiding well indoors, as this is all captured on television.
12-4-18
(39) I Do?
"I've got twelve lords a leaping!" I find myself saying.
There could have been marriage, but how did it come to this, as I
stand on these green green lawns, I do. For she is the presence
about me, but I know not who she is and I know not why I am
here. I do NOT.
15-4-18
(42) Detraction.
I demonstrate something to Andy that is mathematical in nature.
But it soon becomes clear that I am number blind. I cannot do the
arithmetic. I take too long working out the numbers. I struggle
with the numbers and this is an embarrassment to me you see.
This is what undermines my credibility. This is what detracts
people from listening to me. This is what detracts people from
acknowledging what I have to say. But I know. I know what I mean,
even if that is not how it would seem.
Floating Base Arithmetic:
n
0|0
1|1
2 | 10, 2
3 | 11, 3
4 | 100, 4
5 | 101, 12, 5
6 | 110, 20, 6
7 | 111, 21, 13, 7
8 | 1000, 22, 8
9 | 1001, 14, 9
10 |1010, A
11 |1011, 102, 23, 15, B
12 |1100, 30, C
13 |1101, 31, 16, D
14 |1110, 112, 32, 24, E
15 |1111, 120, 33, 17, F
---------------------------------------------
| P1 Pn, P4, P3, P2
TO BE CONTINUED
16-4-18
I introduce the king's word here. I know that it is his word and that
is why have said it. Maybe it will give me some much needed luck.
17-4-18
20-4-18
22-4-18
There has been discussions, but I do not know what has been said.
This corruption is all pervasive and I can see just how it has
spread. Democracy does not work you see. It will split your
country apart. We should all find another way and make it from
the heart. <3
24-4-18
Later I find this card all wrapped in clear plastic and inside there is
a sticky and sweet pastry with sultanas, nuts and raisens. I do not
know whose this is but I take a bite as I slide this pastry through
the plastic and the card and it is sweet and nice. As I walk around
this room full of people eating this pastry I wonder whose pastry I
am eating. I hope that no one will notice so I quickly take another
big bite of this pastry and it is delicious, but it is not mine so
quickly I scoff it all, crinkleing the noisy plastic packaging and this
is my guilt pleasure. I have taken from someone but I know not
who. This pastry has been so nice. It was something that I just had
to do. I place the empty cardboard packaging between two books
on a bookcase hoping that no one will ever know just what I have
done.
25-4-18
(50) A Parody.
I am walking around this place with some other people. We have
got this frame to put together. These hollow aluminium tubes just
slot together. We are finding these pieces to slot together on the
ground all over this place, as we wander and we search and we
work out just exactly which bit slots into which bit.
Someone has just said that they are going to put on the same
show with a low budget. It will be very much similar to the proper
show except that there is no lovely sexy female. He says that there
will be just himself masterbating to the Sham 69 song 'Hurry Up
Harry.' And he starts to sing this song: "Hurry up Harry come on!"
27-4-18
The roof is held up with wooden beams and they are lose. I try to
fix them, but I make things worse and then my dad tells me, "Do
not do that!" And I blow. I lose it.
"Well you sort it out then!" I yell out loud because I am angry.
"You fix the roof!" I rage out loud as the roof comes tumbling
down and there is anger at the slightest thing, but that is me.
I know that these people are good people, but they get me so
fucking mad! With my dad and Jackie, I lose it, I blow my fucking
top! I do not mean to rage so hard, but once I start I cannot stop.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh!"
28-4-18
I get a sense of a French female dressed all in pink. She has long
curly platinum blonde hair. She is quite old and she has a little
dog. I take my turn to move on from her life. I fill out my report for
the next soul to come along. For the next soul to work from my
place. To fill out my space with new energies. To breath life into
this poor girls blue life as we awaken her spirit along. ----->
29-4-18
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Mathematical Space:
Through me, a new space is created. Within mathematics through
me, a new space is created from the Art of that spaceless
mathematical less ness of astral intelligence.
A Trisquare.
A trisquare is a shape within a space, but that space is not the
same as physical space. A trisquare is a shape within two
dimensions within this 'new space shape' that does not mirror a
two dimensional physical space, because it has different
properties. A trisquare has some of the properties of a triangle,
square and circle.
Trisquare Properties.
A trisquare has three sides with three internal angles. Each of
these angles is a square angle. The distance from each vertex to its
opposite side is equal in length all along the line of that opposite
side and so a trisquare has the properties of a triangle, square and
circle respectively.
A Hexcircle.
The picture below is a representation of a hexcircle. The hexcircle
is not in the realm of this space and so this is just an approximate
representation. In this new space a circle and a hexagon is the
same shape and so we get the hexcircle.
The picture above shows that a trisquare with side length of two is
made up of four smaller trisquares. This gives an arithmetic that is
the same as with geometry in standard space. If the side length of
a trisquare is x then its area is equal to x squared.
____________________________________________________
May 2018
____________________________________________________
(56) A Difference.
(57) How Dare He?
(58) Twat!
(59) The Happy Threesome.
(60) Chippy Sets The Table.
(61) Condemn Nation.
(62) The Sarsahr, They See Me In Astral.
(63) All Wired Up.
(64) An Accept Of Time.
(65) I Take To Relieve My Senses.
(66) A Bed Of Onions.
(67) Beer Here.
(68) My Lost Guitar.
(69) Looking For You.
(70) A New Consciousness, Or Just Plain Madness?
(71) What To Do In Looe.
(72) Not A Full Chess Set.
(73) That Trick Shot Is Not Interesting Anymore.
(74) Troubled Colin And The Dick Song.
(75) Busker Adi.
(76) How To Feed Your Head.
(77) My Standards.
(78) Hanging Around.
(79) So Thoughtful.
(80) Deep Blue Baby.
(81) I Make Myself Known.
(82) A Beautiful Old Song.
(83) I Wait In Expectation.
(84) What Does She Want From Me?
(85) Access And Joy From The Elder.
(86) Morning Glory.
(87) So Sure.
(88) Careful With What I Do.
(89) Very Becoming.
(90) Just A Jacket.
(91) Parked Up And Speeding.
(92) Flotsom And Jetsom.
(93) A Default.
(94) Reflections Of A Man.
(95) People! Pee Pole!
(96) Me-And-Her, And Him.
(97) An Astrological Skyscape.
(98) Travel Disruptions.
(99) A Balloon Slapping Time.
(100) Secrecies And Lies.
1-5-18
(56) A Difference.
I see a woman with a bag around her neck. She is middle aged and
she walks right up to me. With her straight face she looks straight
into my eyes and she tells me, "I don't even know what you are
talking about!" This shocks me. There is serious concern on her
face. She reminds me of a woman that I used to know. She is
familiar although I have never seen her before, because she is
similar to this other woman, but there is a difference. It is this
difference that makes me question myself. Who is she? Am I being
mistaken?
2-5-18
Later I see Roger Hales and Mick Benton. Mick says to me, "You
should not have told Roger Hales about your plans."
(58) Twat!
There is a big fuss about whether I bit someone. I was singing and
then they put their finger in my mouth. I was singing 'Nice And
Sleazy.' I had my eyes closed. How did I know that they were going
to put their finger in my mouth? I am told that they have it all on
video. That it has all been recorded. They have the evidence. They
do not let it go. They just keep on about it. So I lose it. I ram my
fist down this lads throat. I twat him. "You see! It's not nice is it!" I
yell, as I make my point and things really heat up then!
3-5-18
4-5-18
"Number one, all these unidentified flying objects that have been
identified. Number two, all the crazies. (I know that he means the
Grey aliens who abduct people here.) Number three ... "
5-5-18
6-5-18
"No" The teacher replies to confirm her mardy mood as she stares
back at me. "Go on then!" She says finding her better judgement
as begrudgingly she changes her mind.
I cannot get away from all these teachers. They follow me around,
all over. They follow me throughout this school. As soon as I think
that I have lost a teacher another one pops its ugly head up out
from nowhere places.
8-5-18
I chat to these two girls about being single. About how I would
rather not be single. I would much prefer to be in a healthy, happy
relationship. As we chat I find some carrots under my bed. Should
I prepare these carrots? I assume that maybe I should. I find a
knife and a bowl of water under my bed also. I guess that maybe
my mum and dad have put these things under my bed. I really do
not mind that my parents have put carrots under my bed and I
inform the two single ladies about this. It is then that I notice
boxes that are full of packets of small onions under my bed or
maybe they are packets of garlic. Some of these packets have
been opened. For obvious reasons I am concerned about opened
packets of onions being under my bed. This is not good!
9-5-18
So, I go to the other music group. I casually open the door. I can
hear the people inside making their music. As I go through this
door to this music group there are some closed curtains. I peer
around through these curtains to see if I can make my way inside
to search for my lost guitar. There is a girl here that I used to know.
I can feel her presence, but I am looking for my guitar and I cannot
find it anywhere. I think back to where I have been. Someone says
that they think that I have left my guitar between two beds, but I
cannot see my guitar anywhere. There are other guitars in cases. I
open up these cases but I do not find my guitar.
I have Evo's guitar now, but it has no frets. This guitar is so odd.
The neck is too long and there are some gubbins on this neck and I
do not know what they do. I wish that I could find my guitar.
10-5-18
I read into the emptiness and I find my words with care. I feel the
emptiness, I fill up with conscious awareness, a dareness that I
find from beyond my mind. To the depths of my soul from the
heart of my kindness. I love this challenge that comes out of a
blindness and creates from the necessity of a concise inciteness.
My visions of my love for you.
11-5-18
I have been away a while and there are boiled sweets stuck to the
duvet on my bed. I guess that people have taken these sweets out
of their mouths and then miss thrown them onto my bed. I tell the
people not to do that. I insist that they make amends. There is a
bin for rubbish and it is not my bed as I tidy up around.
I am walking down the road and I see shapes in the sky. Shades of
light grey squares rotate and fold. This is all subjective I know. We
create our own reality. Is this a greater reality or am I just plain
mad? I feel my way into my future, into somewhere where I have
never been before.
I have just been shopping. I think that I have got a chocolate chess
set now. I am not sure if it is a chess set because the chess pieces
are all represented by different things. I think that the pawn
pieces are shaped like sperm and I have been wondering what the
other chess pieces are represented by with their wondrous
shapes. There are white chocolate and milk chocolate pieces in
this box packaging and I have bought one box out of curiosity.
Well the thing is that one chocolate chess piece had fallen out of
its box packaging in the shop and so I ate it. So as I am stuck here
under this rail hoping that Bob will help me to get free soon, I am
also concerned that I have not got a full chess set.
14-5-18
15-5-18
"What the path?" I ask back and I start to laugh. "Have you been
working too hard?" I joke with him. With that he realises that it is
me. He carries on working busily and he says,
16-5-18
And I meet those people who greet me. They make my work so
good. As we interact we have so much to say. As we all go about
our way with a pick in my hand and a guitar to play. Making my
music in this merry month of May.
(77) My Standards.
She does not know how to use apostrophes. I would not want a
girl like that. I would feel like a care worker for someone with L.D.
(learning disabilities) I would like a girl who's special, but she'd
have to know a lot. I need to find a girl who can stimulate my
mind. If she's useless at grammar then she's probably not for me
and if she cannot spell, well then she's certainly not for me. I need
to have my standards. I do not wish to be unkind. So it's not
surprising that I'm single and that girl I cannot find.
17-5-18
(79) So Thoughtful.
There is this woman with children and a lion. "Why do you choose
to have a lion around your children?" I ask her curiously.
"It's my job." She replies. "Have you never worked with lions
yourself?" She enquires.
"Yes I have, but I am always so unsure about how safe a lion is,
because sometimes when they appear a little restless. If they were
to attack you then it would be too late, you would not stand a
chance." I tell her all this out of concern for her and her children.
18-5-18
For some reason I make out that I do not know Philip. We never
speak much anyway, but this particular day I make the effort to tell
him that I do not know him, "Who are you?" I ask him.
There is this big chunky wooden pole that stands proud out of this
concrete ground. I give it a good bashing and it shudders in the
ground and becomes loose. I knock it to the foundations just as I
get into Philips way. I do not make allowances for him and he has
to avoid me or I will knock into him as I extend my presence, as I
get in his way. He WILL know that I am here!
(82) A Beautiful Old Song.
We are all there my family and I. Someone puts on a recording of
a David Bowie album, but this one is special. There is the
recording of someone else since deceased on this Bowie album. In
a song so sociable, in a sound so sincere, as we get those 70's
feelings about the past that has gone so far away. The essence
that this song captures is in a strikingly beautiful way. And so it
takes us back, my family and I, as we get down into those times
that have since gone by. Captured in a song is a mood that only
dreams could ever find, with all those beautiful old feelings that
people leave behind. And so we leave it there with the love of my
past. Listening to nostalgia of a time that went so fast.
19-5-18
I Wait In Expectation.
20-5-18
I see another woman called Sam. I see her in bed and I join her
there. She is so cute and cozy, but I go straight to sleep because I
like to have morning sex when I wake up from my slumber.
(87) So Sure.
I am on a hillside, as I drive my car up and I park myself away from
the road on this sideway. I have my freedom. I have total freedom.
I find a way in which to play my guitar that does not distract me.
That does not take me away. And these people, they love me.
Deep in the centre of my mind I find these people and that is what
makes me so sure.
21-5-18
I see my sister Maz and she shows me some photos of her fishing
and some of her catches. I show dad these photos. I am surprised
that dad has not seen these photos before. I am surprised that
Maz has not shown dad these photos. I am beginning to wonder if
Maz wanted me to show these photos to dad as Maze is now
compelled to explain these photos to dad as he looks through
them.
I crawl under a road sign in the grass. I crawl under this road sign
that is held up by two posts in the ground. I crawl between these
two posts and I get shitted up to the elbows, but I do not make a
fuss. I find some water. I find a body of water that laps in and I
carefully wash myself down without getting myself too washed up.
I am also aware of a woman in the background watching me as I
wash my arms down, up to my elbows. She makes me more
conscious than I would otherwise be. I imagine what she might
think of me as I clean myself up and so I become a part of her just
as she has become a part of me.
24-5-18
25-5-18
26-5-18
(93) A Default.
It is amazing how many coincidences there are. As I make my way
around the cliff top path to dig my heels into the loose soil of this
earth's cliff edge. I listen to a commentary of a woman:
"It is said that the nearest blonde woman will die if secrets are
divulged. Some secrets have been divulged and a woman in the
next room in Scandinavia is shot in the head. She is a blonde this is
true" I wonder to myself, who fired that bullet? The bullet is tiny
but the devastation is real and complete.
So as I navigate this cliff's edge I notice how the trees have been
set. How the trees have been cut back and the shadows that fall
across this cliff's edge path through those tree stumps that remain
and the coincidences are remarkable. How everything falls
together as I risk my life along this cliff's path edge. The
coincidences are astounding as they reveal themselves to me, a
geological truth of fault lines that cross here and so things will
happen how they do.
27-5-18
28-5-18
29-5-18
As I look up at the sky I ask this man, "What colour is that sky?"
Knowing full well that the sky is in three shades of light red, with
all the planets, stars and galaxies pencilled in. I would just like
some conformation about this.
I am wandering around looking up at this spectacle in the sky. I am
in wonderment. I am wandering around looking up at this
astrological display and I am in awe of this alignment today.
30-5-18
31-5-18
____________________________________________________
June 2018
____________________________________________________
1-6-18
There are other train drivers on the railway who are pillocking
about also. They say one thing and do another. I hear talk that
they are going to get a super fast train to beat those pillocking
train drivers at their own game. They will charge off through the
railway system with their super fast train at the very last second
and surprise those stupid train drivers with a last second burst
through the signals on the line. That will show them!
2-6-18
(102) Engaging.
There are three talks on tonight and there are three different
women who divide these three talks with their presence. I look at
these women and I note their differences.
The last woman is chatty. She is lively as she smiles and interacts.
She has neat blonde hair to her shoulder and a pretty face. She is
young and attractive as she socialises.
3-6-18
4-6-18
5-6-18
"Yeah I get it now." I tell him. It is not the sort of guitar solo that I
would make up, but it is okay.
7-6-18
8-6-18
"We are just looking for jobs to do, is an excuse to make some
money to pay for our college education."
Then I think, 'I hope that no one heard me say that. I might sound
ungrateful for the work that we do get.'
So it is just me and a bumblebee who follows me around
everywhere. She used to be my sister in a previous life, but now
she just buzzes around like a stripey dot in the air. She is even
more snotty now. Now that she is a bumblebee!
-------------------------------------------------------------
It is me and a bee,
we travel around free.
We are looking for jobs to do
to pay for our college tuition.
Then I think,
'I hope that no one heard me say that.
I might sound ungrateful
for the work that we do get.'
So it is just me and a bumblebee
who follows me around everywhere.
She used to be my sister in a previous life,
but now she just buzzes around like a stripey dot in the air.
9-6-18
There are these sea creatures. Human hybrids between seals and
sharks that we left for dead. They are now healthy and free saved
by our intervention. These animals are like people. They reflect so
much humanity to us as they watch us and we can see something
of ourselves in them.
Lisa and I we scale the dizzy heights of this building and she tells
me that she has known me since 2013. We marvel at how fast this
time has gone by. We negotiate a difficult transfer from an iron
ladder to a concrete block platform. She laughs as she is stuck in
this iron stair well. Like a plug she sets herself free. Like a plug she
pulls herself out from this tight fitting stairwell.
10-6-18
(113) Somewhat The Grey.
I feel myself as a small skinny light grey alien. I am something else
as well, but that something else whatever it is leaves me
somewhat. That something else that is darker and larger and more
substantial, leaves me to become more of that small skinny light
grey alien. Who comes out as himself, as an aspect of myself from
such deep love, deep within my soul somewhat.
I feel myself
as a small skinny light grey alien.
I am something else as well,
but that something else whatever it is
leaves me somewhat.
That something else that is darker
and larger and more substantial,
leaves me to become more of that
small skinny light grey alien,
who comes out as himself,
as an aspect of myself
from such deep love,
deep within my soul
somewhat.
11-6-18
(114) Obtrexity.
For some reason I have a clash of perceptual experience with
someone else uninvitingly. Within his box of perceptual delights. I
pass by through it all refracted. Which alters the visual effect in a
most mysterious way. This puts a few thoughts out there, but it is
a really nice effect.
Then someone starts using obscure voice sounds, but I can read
right through these sounds and I decipher them completely. They
are not so mysterious to me and reveals a gay tendency in that
person who does not know how much they are revealing about
themselves. I am given the word 'Obtrexity.'
12-6-18
13-6-18
There are places where I go where I find Lisa when I want her.
I search through my mind to find her standing there.
Just the way that I want her.
Just the place where I like her to be.
She stands there looking pretty you see.
I search through my mind and she stands there so true.
As pretty as a picture.
A pleasure to view
and she is so sexy too. <3
15-6-18
(117) To Play The Ocean.
I play my guitar and I practice an unusual bar chord. The sky is
grey and the rain comes down and floods me out. This bar chord
makes me play my guitar like I have a disability. I feel like a spastic.
Then it is as if the sky becomes the ocean. In an instant I am under
an emense body of water. WOW! This is some bar chord to be
able to do that!
e 3+n
b 2+n
g 2+n
d 0+n
ax
Ex
n
0 ---> D
1 ---> D#/Eb
2 ---> E
3 ---> F
4 ---> F#/Gb
5 ---> G
6 ---> G#/Ab
7 ---> A
8 ---> A#/Bb
9 ---> B
10 ---> C
11 ---> C#/Db
12 ---> D
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chord Sequence 1
Bm Em D A
Bm Em D A
Am Dm C G
Am Dm C G
Chord Sequence 2
EGAB
EGAB
D# D C A
D# D C A
riff:
eeggaaa#a#
eeggaaa#a#
aaccddd#d#
aaccddd#d#
16-6-18
(118) Unreal!
I see a foot. It is not a real foot. It is a cartoon foot and it is buried
in this cartoon ground. I see the cross section through the ground
and I believe this foot to be mine. I tilt my leg forward and I tell
myself that it is difficult to do this as my joint on the top of my
foot aches when I tilt my leg forward. 'Why is my leg in this
cartoon?' I am suddenly wondering to myself. 'And why is my
cartoon foot buried under a cartoon ground of soil?' I think that I
may have planted myself here!
Unreal!
I see a foot.
It is not a real foot.
It is a cartoon foot.
It is buried within this cartoon ground.
I see the cross section through this ground.
17-6-18
As He Goes On.
18-6-18
(120) That Is Okay.
I get back with my ex from when I was a teenager or that is how it
feels like to me. Except that she is not my ex really she is another
woman entirely who lives in a much different county from where I
used to live as a teenager. And I am not exactly going out with her.
She is not my girlfriend as such, but she is a good friend of mine
and I do have a crush on her. She like my ex has had her children
with someone else and they have all grown up now. I am in my
fifties now. I have missed out on all of that family life of watching
your children as they grow up, but that is okay. I have extricated
myself from all of that part of humanity for many years until now,
because I feel that I have suddenly dropped back into a family life
that I have never really known before. Into a life that I have always
avoided, but that is okay.
19-6-18
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sea Shanty written by Adi Cox:
Intro:
g# e f# c#, g# e f#, g# e f# c#, g# d# b c#
e|4 _ _ _ _ 4 _ _ _ 4 _ _ _ _ 4 _ _ _
B|_ 5 7 _ _ _ 5 7 _ _ 5 7 _ _ _ 4 _ _
G|_ _ _ 6 _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 6 _ _ _ 4 6
D|_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
A|_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
E|_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[Verse 1:]
[Am]I have a [D]scam going[C]
[Am]Being so close to the [D]sea[C]
[Am]I deal in illi[D]galities[C]
[Am]Some interest to [D]me
[Chorus:]
[Dm]Down by the [G]shoreline
[Dm]Down by the [G]cove
[Dm]Down by the [G]coastal path [A]
[Verse 2:]
[Am]There is a [D]pathway[C]
[Am]That lights up the [D]trees[C]
[Am]Along to the [D]sandy shore where[C]
[Am]Where no one [D]sees
[Chorus:]
[Dm]Down by the [G]shoreline
[Dm]Down by the [G]cove
[Dm]Down by the [G]coastal path [A]
[Verse 3:]
[Am]We have some [D]treasure[C]
[Am]And we have some [D]beer[C]
[Am]And I have a [D]woman who[C]
[Am]I hold [D]dear
[Chorus:]
[Dm]Down by the [G]shoreline
[Dm]Down by the [G]cove
[Dm]Down by the [G]coastal path [A]
[Chorus 2:]
[Em]Down by the [A]shoreline
[Em]Down by the [A]cove
[Em]Down by the [A]coastal path [B]
[Em]La de da [A]de dar
[Em]La de da [A]dar
[Em]La de da [A]de dar dum [B][Em]
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Intro:
a f# g d a f# g a f# g d a e c d
e|5 _ _ _ _ 5 _ _ _ 5 _ _ _ _ 5 _ _ _
B|_ 6 8 _ _ _ 6 8 _ _ 6 8 _ _ _ 5 _ _
G|_ _ _ 7 _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 7 _ _ _ 5 7
D|_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
A|_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
E|_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[Verse 1:]
[Dm]I have a [G]scam going[F]
[Dm]Being so close to the [G]sea[F]
[Dm]I deal in illi[G]galities[F]
[Dm]Some interest to [G]me
[Chorus:]
[Gm]Down by the [C]shoreline
[Gm]Down by the [C]cove
[Gm]Down by the [C]coastal path [D]
[Verse 2:]
[Dm]There is a [G]pathway[F]
[Dm]That lights up the [G]trees[F]
[Dm]Along to the [G]sandy shore where[F]
[Dm]Where no one [G]sees
[Chorus:]
[Gm]Down by the [C]shoreline
[Gm]Down by the [C]cove
[Gm]Down by the [C]coastal path [D]
[Verse 3:]
[Dm]We have some [G]treasure[F]
[Dm]And we have some [G]beer[F]
[Dm]And I have a [G]woman who[F]
[Dm]I hold [G]dear
[Chorus:]
[Gm]Down by the [C]shoreline
[Gm]Down by the [C]cove
[Gm]Down by the [C]coastal path [D]
[Chorus 2:]
[Am]Down by the [D]shoreline
[Am]Down by the [D]cove
[Am]Down by the [D]coastal path [E]
[Am]La de da [D]de dar
[Am]La de da [D]dar
[Am]La de da [D]de dar dum [E][Am]
21-6-18
(122) Tracey.
How it all fits in. This has all been done before and so this is the
mould. This is the pattern that I use and I go with it. This is so
other worldly that I cannot explain it clearly. This is so 'out there'
that it is so 'not here.' Like some ethereal bus stop that I wait at
for the movement to begin. Everything falls into place in this
ethereal space that I trace out as I space out here.
(123) Negotiate.
I am walking along and I make my way over some grass from the
park to a path by the road when suddenly I notice a big double
decker bus facing me coming out of a tee junction over across the
road when this big bugs bunny cartoon character jumps up and
appears on the wind screen of this bus obscuring the bus driver's
view. My initial thought is, 'How does the bus driver see past
that?' When I suddenly realise that it is designed to make the bus
driver stop the bus, because this bus has advance warnings built
into it.
I then find myself squeezing through this tiny gap between a large
red pillar box and a stone wall. I am in two minds about whether I
should do this because the gap is tight and I am in danger of
getting stuck, but I have committed myself to squeeze through this
gap now. I panic a little as there is no guarantee that I will get
through here.
22-6-18
(125) To Declare Or Not To Declare, That Is The Question.
I tell my sister Maz that I need some work on the disco. She tells
me that she can get some work from Ian. "Let me go and check
when I am free." I tell her.
"You will have to declare that you are living at home and so you
will have to pay tax." My sister warns me.
I think about what my sister tells me. "Yes I still want the work." I
confirm to her and so then we both go off in different directions. I
go to get my diary and she goes to get the information of the disco
work that she is giving away to me, but I am slightly miffed about
the tax thing. I have some deep thoughts about this, 'Is there any
way that I can avoid the burden of paying tax?' I wonder to myself
and I mull on this.
23-6-18
"We spoke for a while in a polite kind of way about this and that,
where it was at and what sort of day it had been. The things that
she had seen and what it all could mean about this and that and
where we are all at."
"We spoke for a while
in a polite kind of way
about this and that,
where it was at
and what sort of day it had been.
The things that she had seen
and what it all could mean
about this and that
and where we are all at."
24-6-18
I find myself deep within. Where no one else can go. This is my
space, this is my place. Somewhere only I can know. This is where I
find my peace. A place to feel at ease. Where a side of me drops
out of this world into a sanctity that is hidden. A side of me that
no one ever sees.
25-6-18
26-6-18
28-6-18
I am by the sea now and the tide is high. Some of the pavement is
flooded and there are some offices deep in water. I grab hold of
this rail as I walk along the path and that rail falls off and spins into
a wheel. I run off and the spinning rail of a wheel follows me fast
from behind, until I go through a narrow gap and the spinning rail
of a wheel gets stuck hard with a clank!
I find myself climbing down this crane. I know that I should not be
doing this. I grip hard with my hands and like Spiderman I climb
down. It is as if I am climbing down for ages. I did not think that I
had been so high. I touch the ground near the top of this
incinerator and I feel the warmth from it and then it gets much
hotter as I pass over it.
Then I decide to fly like a spirit in the sky. There are workers all
around me, but no one looks at me. I recognize the energy of
someone who I do not know. I know their energy and yet I do not
know who they are. It is because I know their energy that that is
where I go to you see. Just me and thee. The energy that I know.
A Journey To Thee.
I laugh and I tell my girlfriend who is not watching this film, "He's
a dodgy fucker!" I tell her. "You know these old films are fucking
brilliant!" I inform her in a rather determined sort of way, as I am
still amused with this film that has just finished. My girlfriend just
looks across to me from the kitchen as she is drying some dishes
with a tea towel. She is not really interested and she says nothing.
30-6-18
I feel awkward. I tell this bloke, "I fancy that woman that Alan
likes." 'Should I have said that?' I wonder to myself as soon as I
have said it.
"Yes, it's not like she's Alan's girlfriend, is she." I retort whilst
thinking deeply about this situation. I wonder if this bloke will
secretly tell Alan what I have just said.
The woman who Alan fancies is a black woman also, but she is
slim and dignified, just like her friend. Maybe there is a twin thing
going on here, but I still prefer the one that Alan likes. Both of
them are very nice, but that one that Alan likes is the better one.
____________________________________________________
July 2018
____________________________________________________
(133) Jumble Room.
(134) My Reading.
(135) A New Buy.
(136) A Dry Water Drought.
(137) He Is The Star, Not Me.
(138) Received Help.
(139) However.
(140) Babylon's Burning, But Silently.
(141) In Anticipation.
(142) In Need Of A Piss.
(143) The Dealer.
(144) A Boo Boo!
(145) OK Computer.
(146) A Voice That Moves You.
(147) Daft Twat!
(148) Heatwave, Torbay, Devon 2018.
(149) Float On By.
(150) Nothing Much.
(151) 'Up High Along'.
(152) Over My Shoulder.
(153) Neptune personified.
(154) Songs Of Silence, Songs Of Sound.
(155) Ron. (Meditative thoughts)
(156) Zapped!
(157) Astrological Mathematics:
(158) On A Visit.
(159) Untranslatable.
(160) A Vast Reservoir.
(161) Do Not Try!
(162) A Hard Brexit Woman.
(163) Creamy And Yellow.
(164) Followed Back In Time.
(165) Ignorant Twat!
(166) Meet Up.
(167) One Sunny Afternoon.
(168) A Jammer.
(169) Vague Woman.
(170) Timeline Reset Integrate Sync Machine. (T.R.I.S.M).
(171) An Example And A Witness.
(172) Fixated.
(173) Have You Been Talking About Me?
(174) The Unknown.
(175) "Hasn't Anyone Got A Cloth?"
(176) A Witness From Above.
(177) In The Meantime.
(178) They Say ...
(179) A Likely Scenario.
(180) Subtle Manipulation?
(181) The Man In The Air.
(182) The Punk That I Am.
1-7-18
"I am having a seance." She informs me. "Let me see your palm."
She goes on to say. She holds onto my finger tips, as I show her my
flat palm, as I hold it out to her. She takes a quick look at my palm,
turns her nose up and pushes my palm back to me. 'And what
does that mean?' I wonder to myself.
"I will have to buy you a house." He concludes. "But I do not like to
buy houses on a Sunday." He goes on to say.
"I will need to use a code on a Sunday." He says thinking out loud.
2-7-18
(136) A Dry Water Drought.
I am on tour with the Prince Of Wales. Everything has been set up
and runs to a plan. I find myself in this old school building as part
of the tour that we are on.
I curiously watch this man who is on tour with us. He never seems
to get wet. I am fascinated because I see him as he stands there by
this water fountain with the water spouting down his neck and yet
he does not get wet. He does not notice the water on his neck and
all his clothes are dry, yet I see the water spouting down his neck.
This is strange. Why does he not get wet? Maybe there is a hose
pipe ban due to this heat wave, because I hear that we are in a
drought now and I am in no doubt now that this man should be
wet!
3-7-18
Everyday she gets trapped inside her house. She spot welds a shell
of a caravan inside her house. Mrs Mitchell is happy to receive my
help, before Mrs Mitchell becomes a prisoner of her own home,
before Mrs Mitchell spot welds the shell of a caravan inside her
house. This is something that she does daily. This is her daily
routine. This is how she traps herself inside and the help that I
give her is greatly received.
(139) However.
I give Lisa a lift in my car. We have some banter. We always have
some banter, as we tease each other. There is a communication
breakdown between us and I meet Lisa coming up, as I am going
down on my way back. There are three winding lanes down this
road which are in parallel to each other and Lisa drives down the
central lane every time. She is the arrow in the middle who goes
the opposite way to the outer two lanes. Maybe I can sort this
problem out or maybe I cannot. I languish on this problem. I mull
over the details and I hold back. It might get sorted out or it might
not. We will just have to wait and see how it goes.
5-7-18
(141) In Anticipation.
I am in a queue. I have put my feelers out to navigate those
timelines of events that I sense. I see myself as a voluptuous
woman in a black dress. I am in a front row seat now, in an
auditorium, as an audience member to a show that does not
reveal itself. I am with others who are special like me. We are in
the front row and we forge out a future in a mysteriously galactic
way. We are special because with our hybridized ways we lead
new pathways. We lead new pathways as spectators and as the
will of the people in the greatest show ever. The stage is set and
yet it does not reveal itself to us, not yet.
6-7-18
(142) In Need Of A Piss.
I am with this lass. We share legs. My legs slot into her legs and
her legs slot into my legs. I do not know how this works and it
feels strange at first. She is right behind me and we go around a
supermarket to start with. I am a little self conscious at first, but
then I soon get into my stride and then I need the toilet:
The toilets are bricked up. The toilets entrances are two diamond
shaped windows bricked up and painted over in white gloss paint.
I see that Liam Jarvis is attending these toilets. I think to myself,
'Liam is not going to like this.' And I precede to kick in the
diamond shaped window for the male toilets. I kick in those bricks
and I hear Liam exclaim, "Oh no!" Because now he has a lot of
work to do. Then Liam decides to kick in some of these bricks that
still remain blocking up some of this diamond shaped window. So
now the toilets are full of rubble and they take some getting into.
Once inside I notice another wall that is a bit rickety and I ask
Liam, "Has this wall always been here?" And he assures me that it
has. Although I am a little puzzled by it. It is such a mess in here,
but I do need a piss.
All I know is, is that Sharon is sorting out these business deals. She
went out earlier this morning and I have not seen her since. I
guess that she must be still sorting out those business deals.
7-7-18
9-7-18
(145) OK Computer.
I am living my life to the full dancing and stuff. I am aware of this
computer that Mark has. He is concerned that it is being over
used. I check how hot the computer is by putting my hand on it
and I notice that it has a number seventy in red L.E.D. digits on the
keyboard and I am wondering what that means. This computer is
being used as some sort of equaliser for music that is being
played. This computer is being used to its maximum. It is only a
little cheap computer but it is running okay for now.
10-7-18
I ask Noel Gallagher and someone else this and we are all
stumped. We sit there searching our minds in silence and we do
not come up with an answer.
11-7-18
I languish around
with leisure and ease
and I capture cool spray
that blows in on the breeze.
12-7-18
13-7-18
(150) Nothing Much.
I am in this big old works building on a night shift. There is another
worker here and he has left a tap running into a sink. He has also
left a door open that leads outside and the wind is blowing about.
'Is he trashing this place?' I wonder to myself. Then another
worker walks in through the door that has been left open.
15-7-18
I am close to the waters edge now. The sea is so still. This tall man
comes out of the sea. He has a hood and he is faceless except that
there are two wide and flat tines, just like his feet, that go across
his dark empty hood. Across the black empty space where his face
should be. His gown is a mottled blue and white. I am scared of
this strange tall man at first, but he reassures me telepathically
and I get the message:
"I am taking you in before your time. You will have to do this."
16-7-18
(156) Zapped!
I have trouble with the microwave. I put it on for 9 minutes 20
seconds. "You will burn your sponge pudding!" I am told. I turn the
dial but the microwave keeps cooking. I pull the plug out and still
the microwave keeps cooking. I am in a panic now. Those
microwaves could zap me! I open the microwave door and I run
off, away from those waves.
(158) On A Visit.
I am staying at Sharon Taylor's house. Her mum is there too. I
struggle to find my clothes. I am wandering around naked and I
really need to get some clothes on. I think that I put my clothes in
this wardrobe. I struggle to open the wardrobe door because it
has a clever mechanism that allows for greater storage and there
is a knack to opening this door. After a little struggle and a head
scratch I manage to get inside this wardrobe. Yes, my clothes are
here, but there is only one T shirt. I guess that that will have to do.
I key in some items on my small silver lap top computer that I have
with me, but my computer will not let me key in any more items.
There is a clear crystal L.E.D. display on my keyboard that gives the
letters wt. That means weight. For some reason my computer
doubles up as a carry case and it is telling me that the items that I
have keyed into the computer weigh too much to be carried in the
carry case. I never even said that these items were going into the
carry case. Stupid computer. I turn the computer over and there is
a compartment underneath that is open. It has a display light on
that lights up the back panel and it gives off this gentle white light.
There are tiny tools in there all laid out in rows and columns. I
really do not know what these tools are for.
18-7-18
(159) Untranslatable.
Lisa asks me if I can play a song and if I can sing it quietly. "Yes." I
tell her enthusiastically, as I get up on stage and I get into my song.
I whisper sing and I play along. There is something else, but it has
gone. Untranslatable.
Untranslatable.
Lisa asks me
if I can play a song,
if I can sing it quietly.
"Yes." I tell her enthusiastically,
as I get up on stage
and I get into my song.
I whisper sing and I play along.
There is something else,
but it has gone.
Untranslatable.
I keep up
with these music competitions
to see how it feels.
I play these songs for people
just to see what it reveals.
There is something else,
but it has gone.
Untranslatable.
Rhetorically
I am asked,
"How long has he been with you?"
And cryptically I am told,
"He will live with you,
to your short circuits."
This is a clue.
Something new.
There is something else,
but it has gone.
Untranslatable.
The lad who I am talking to totally agrees with me. He totally gets
what I am saying here. I watch him as he thoughtfully looks to the
ground, as he takes one last drag of his cigarette and as he nods
his head in agreement with me. He flicks what is left of his filter
cigarette away. I watch the parabolic trajectory that his cigarette
makes through the air before it bounces on the concrete ground
and then rolls in an arc to a stop.
19-7-18
20-7-18
"Bloody typical, the council want to come along here and sort out
these puddles! It's a disgrace that we all have to drive along these
melting roads!"
I decide to keep walking on, but I recognise that voice and I cannot
work out who he is. It bugs me and so I go back to find out who he
is and I meet some more of my ex colleagues who are hanging
around. We have a chat and a good laugh, but I do not find that
person who shouted out at me in the first place. I rack my mind,
but I cannot work out who he is. I just cannot place this man. I
know his voice so well. Where did he go to and why did I not get
to meet him? Maybe he is avoiding me. Maybe he is ignoring me.
21-7-18
Meet Up.
There is a drummer,
Drumming along mixing up his beats.
There are singers singing
sitting on their seats
and clapping,
clap clap.
There is a message
that we all send out
and a position to defend
as we all shout out,
but we all meet up in the end.
Yes, we all meet up in the end.
22-7-18
23-7-18
(168) A Jammer.
I am keeping a low profile. There are many of us who play guitar
here and I wonder how I am going to assimilate myself amongst all
these guitarists. Some of them are a bit clicky with each other and
I wonder if I will ever get a look in with my jamming here. I have
my trusty chords and I have my blues scale, but how will I get a
look in? They say patience is a virtue and I am no virtuoso, but I
can rattle something out, if I ever get a chance. I can find
something to shout about and sometimes people dance, but will I
ever get a look in?
24-7-18
25-7-18
25-7-18
(172) Fixated.
I go through my mobile phone which monitors my bio-chemistry.
Biological explosions and chemical reactions flash up on the
screen as moving text that scrolls up. These details run off so
quickly. I feel great sensations that mirror the information on my
phone. I am spoilt in this reality, but at a deeper level my bio-
chemistry has been corrupted. I draw on my inner resources as my
mobile keeps me high, as my eyes fixate on the screen and my
mind works out why these sensations mirror my vision. So this is
how my biology reacts to stimuli and all those little things that I
do. How my biology reacts to my need to get a fix and how I
become the content of what I view.
Intro:
e|_____2_2___0________2_2___0
B|_____3_3___2________3_3___2
G|_____2_2___2________2_2___2
D |_ _ 0 2 _ 0 _ 0 _ _ _ 2_ _ _ _ _ 0 2 _ 0 _ 0 _ _ _ 2
A |_ 2 _ _ _ x _ x _ _ _ 0 _ _ _ _ 2 _ _ _ x _ x _ _ _ 0
E |0 _ _ _ _ x _ x _ _ _ 0_ _ _ 0 _ _ _ _ x _ x _ _ _ 0
Verse 1:
'O' [D]I've been [C]looking for you [A]here down [Bb]town
The [D]sun is [C]shining and [A]you're so [Bb]brown
[D]Living in a [C]dream where [A]ever you [Bb]go
But [D]there's one [C]thing that [A]I want to [Bb]know
Chorus:
[N.C.]Have you been talking about me?
[Em] ||- [Em11] | - [A] | - [A] ||| - [D] || - [Em11] | - [A] | -
[N.C.]Have - you - been - talking - about - me?
[Em] ||- [Em11] | - [A] | - [A] ||| - [D] || - [Em11] | - [A] | -
[A] |||
[Em] ||- [Em11] | - [A] | - [A] ||| - [D] || - [Em11] | - [A] | -
Verse 2:
I [D]see you in the [C]park with your [A]friends all a[Bb]round
I [D]keep my ears [C]close to [A]those on the [Bb]ground
I [D]listen to the [C]gossip and I [A]know what you [Bb]say
I [D]want your ad[C]mission and I [A]want it to[Bb]day
Chorus:
[N.C.]Have you been talking about me?
[Em] ||- [Em11] | - [A] | - [A] ||| - [D] || - [Em11] | - [A] | -
[N.C.]Have - you - been - talking - about - me?
[Em] ||- [Em11] | - [A] | - [A] ||| - [D] || - [Em11] | - [A] | -
[A] |||
[Em] ||- [Em11] | - [A] | - [A] ||| - [D] || - [Em11] | - [A] | -
Outro:
e|_____2_2___0
B|_____3_3___2
G|_____2_2___2
D |_ _ 0 2 _ 0 _ 0 _ _ _ 2
A |_ 2 _ _ _ x _ x _ _ _ 0
E |0 _ _ _ _ x _ x _ _ _ 0
_____D_D ___A
27-7-18
x^2 - nx - 1 = 0
([n+sqrt(n^2+4))/2]-n)^-m
where, golden mean n=1, silver mean n=2, bronze mean n=3, and
so on down through the metallic elements. It is not strictly defined
which metallic elements follow on from bronze. Maybe copper
n=4, aluminium n=5, tin n=6 and so on. m is the number of times
the a x na shapes have been scaled down to b x nb and repeated.
When m is odd then side b is horizontal and side nb is vertical.
When m is even then side b is vertical and side nb is horizontal.
28-7-18
29-7-18
30-7-18
31-7-18
____________________________________________________
August 2018
____________________________________________________
1-8-18
A solvable Quatratic:
x^2-5x+6 = (x-a)(x-b)
**********
a+b=-5
ab=6
**********
-2 + -3 =-5
(-2)(-3)=6
A Solvable Cubic:
*************
a+b+c=-6
ab+bc+ac=11
abc=-6
*************
-1 + -2 + -3 =-6
(-1)(-2)+(-2)(-3)+(-3)(-1)=2+6+3=11
(-1)(-2)(-3)=-6
(x-1)(x-2)(x-3)
(x=1)(x=2)(x=3)
A Solvable Quartic:
Ax^4+Bx^3+Cx^2+Dx+E
******************
a+b+c+d=B
ab+ac+ad+bc+bd+cd=C
abc+abd+acd+bcd=D
abcd=E
******************
(x-a/A)(x-b/A)(x-c/A)(x-d/A)
A Solvable Quintic:
Ax^5+Bx^4+Cx^3+Dx^2+Ex+F
******************
a+b+c+d+e=B
ab+ac+ad+ae+bc+bd+be+cd+ce+de=C
abc+abd+abe+acd+ace+bcd+bce+cde=D
abcd+abce+abde+bcde=E
abcde=F
******************
(x-a/A)(x-b/A)(x-c/A)(x-d/A)(x-e/A)
An Unsolvable Quintic:
y = x^5-10x+2
Use a little calculus in the xy plane to show the polynomial attains
a maximum at -2¼ and a minimum at 2¼. These are all the real
roots of y'=5x^4-10, and there are no other local maxima or
minima.
5(x^2-10^1/2)(x^2+10^1/2)
The graph crosses the x axis once to the left of -2¼, once between
-2¼ and 2¼, and once to the right of 2¼. Therefore y=x^5-10x+2
has 3 real roots and two complex roots.
Ax^5+Bx^4+Cx^3+Dx^2+Ex+F
1x^5+0x^4+0x^3+0x^2+10x+2
******************
B=a+b+c+d+e=0
C=ab+ac+ad+ae+bc+bd+be+cd+ce+de=0
D=abc+abd+abe+acd+ace+bcd+bce+cde=0
E=abcd+abce+abde+bcde=10
F=abcde=2
******************
(x-a/1)(x-b/1)(x-c/1)(x-d/1)(x-e/1)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
B=0
C=(ab=i)+(ac=6)+(ad=i)+(ae=-9)+(bc=2i/3)
+(bd=1/9)+(be=-1)+(cd=-2/3)+(ce=-6)+(de=1)
=[6-9+1/9-1-2/3-6] + [i+i+2i/3]
=-10.'5' + 2.'6'i
D=(abc=-2i)+abd+abe+acd+ace+bcd+bce+cde=0
F=2
Later I find myself in a hut with four others. One of the organisers
comes in with his clip board. He has information on the other four
people but he does not have any information on me. "Don't worry
about it. It makes sense. I am not really a part of this group." I tell
him, but he still radios through to someone to cover his back, to
make sure that I am okay to be left behind. We are all a bit of a
rabble to be honest, but we are all having fun.
Our Familiarity.
I walk home from this gig with my sister and when we almost get
home I see some hands waving at us as if to instruct us to get
down. 'This is very odd.' I think to myself. I notice that my dad is
laid down half hidden in someones front garden. He waves me
over and instructs me to get down with his hand all at the same
time. My sister Maz by this time is further on up the road. When I
get to my dad he tells me that there is a crazed murdering
madman in the neighbourhood. "Great that is all we need!" I reply
sarcasticly to my dad.
"I know that there is one milk left." Says Lisa informatively. I think
about this and I remember seeing a green semi skimmed milk
carton. I think to myself that I will definitely need to go out
shopping soon, only because Lisa is quizzing me on this, otherwise
I would not have thought about food shopping at all. And so the
big question is ... ?
3-8-18
I am a shining example
of how a relationship can go.
So I must say
that she follows me on
with my knowledge
and she is eager to know
in her own most beautiful way.
4-8-18
5-8-18
Trapped In My Room.
There are some big old victorian houses here that have been
converted into flats. They have stone steps outside their front
doors. As we are chatting, this lass and I, we notice two lads
walking down some of these stone steps. But one of these lads
has coke cans fixed to his clothes. He is covered in coke cans all
over his jacket, all over his jeans, there are these coke cans held
within special pockets just big enough for coke cans to fit into. We
both find ourselves looking at this lad walking down these stone
steps with his friend and he is really struggling. He is really
encumbered with the weight of all these coke cans.
"I think that he has a problem there." I point out to this lass as we
get distracted from our conversation.
I am walking along down the path next to the road with this bloke.
I notice a woman outside her front garden pottering around, when
I am suddenly aware that the bloke who was walking along the
road with me has vanished. I look further and I notice that he is
hastily walking off, before he hides behind some bins. It is then
that I remember that he owes some money to the butcher. I
wonder to myself, 'Maybe she is that butcher.'
It is ages before she goes into her house. I am standing there and
then when I think that she has finished in her garden. I tell the
bloke with hand signals that it is all clear. Only for her to pop back
up in her garden again. So then I have to tell him to get back, but
eventually she goes back into her house. By this time Lisa has seen
this bloke who is called Dave. Lisa and Dave are best friends. So
now all three of us are able to walk past this woman's house and
this is when I realise that somehow I have gotten involved in
Dave's drama.
7-8-18
9-8-18
"Sorry?" I say, as I make sure that I listen to her more carefully this
time.
10-8-18
a^2/x^2 + b^2/y^2 = 1
a^2/x^2 + b^2/y^2 = 1
a^2/x^2 + b^2/y^2 = 1
Out in the garden he is fixed to a tree with his bits and bobs and a
drill, as far as I can see. He does his little jobs in no time, but then
he is stuck up in a tree. He is a strange little man as far as I can
see. "Don't bring me down." He says, as he is only three foot two,
stuck up in that tree with nothing better to do. He is being guided
in such a dull dull light, as he gets himself around within this dark
dark night. He is such a dull dull man and there is something not
quite right. It is not just about his little height. He acts a little
strange and he is an unusual sight. He is that little man who is just
not quite right.
This poem above is sourced from a dream that was a little creepy.
I wrote this dream up as soon as I woke up from my dream. I was
all bleary eyed and between the sleep state and wakefulness
when I wrote this dream up. This was a dream that gave me chills
down my spine. It has been so very difficult to put words to this
dream as, as in many dreams it was very surreal and so very much
out of this physical world, but after a lot of deliberation and care
the above poem is the best account that I can give.
12-8-18
The musical opportunity with Mark is not the stave pipework that
I am currently on now, but a much cleaner and simpler musical
experience to wratchet up, because it is more of a single solid bar
which is much thinner and made up from stainless steel. It runs
along horizontally in a thin clean silvery grey colour which is quite
impressive really. This is how I see it anyway. It is within a circle of
my mind at this moment of time, because it is a figment of my
imagination at this moment in time. You see I have a thing about
my timing and the time signitures that I keep and that I use. So
this is something that I am really interested in looking into.
So one day I am out for a walk in the park, when this professor is
so rude as to push past in front of me. And as he does so he falls
down hard. He bangs his head on the wall of a bouncy castle that
has been inflated in the park. I am in shock and a man in the park
points his finger at me, "He pushed him!" He shouts out accusing
me of causing the professor to fall. The man shouts this out just as
the professors head bounces back up off the bouncy castle wall.
The professor then replies in an insant, "Oh no he didn't." And
with that the professor dashes up the bandstand steps in front of
me. Eager to get on with the work of the day and I carry on with
my walk in the park, untroubled and relaxed and with nothing to
say.
13-8-18
So if no number greater than one and less than 24 divides into 619
to give an integer answer then 619 is a prime number.
A/m=x.y
619/2*=309.5
619/3*=206.'3'rec
619/4=154.75
619/5*=123.8
619/6=103.1'6'rec
619/7*=88.'428571'rec
619/8=77.375
619/9=68.'7'rec
619/10=61.9
619/11*=56.'27'rec
619/12=51.58'3'rec
619/13*=47.'615384'rec
619/14=44.2142857143 to 10 d.p.
619/15=41.2'6'rec
619/16=38.6875
619/17*=36.4117647059 to 10 d.p.
619/18=34.3'8'rec
619/19*=32.5789473684 to 10 d.p.
619/20=30.95
619/21=29.'476190'rec
619/22=28.1'36'rec
619/23*=26.9130434783 to 10 d.p.
14-8-18
(210) Why?
There is a lot of pillocking about. Two people jump on me and
start writing on my head. I get them back immediately in anger. I
get some ink on their heads too. I lose my patience with them.
Violently and angrily I pen and ink their heads, to get my revenge
on them. I press on hard on their scalp with my pen. So now we all
look a right mess. I still have to get my jobs done here with all this
grafitti on my head. My mum is not happy with me. I get told off
by her for my behaviour. I get a good dressing down by her for
what I have done back in anger and for letting those people write
on my head. This writing on peoples heads has gotten well out of
hand now. I feel self conscious as I push bike through the streets
with black ink scribble on my head. It hurts too when people
scribble on your head. It is like a monkey scrub. When people
scrub their knuckles on your scalp and you know how painful that
is! I do not know how this all started. I feel that I have been
attacked for no reason. I am annoyed that people just go around
scribbling around on other peoples heads. Why do they do that?
15-8-18
"You have got some muscles you have." I say to this small creature
in its cage. As it gets up off all fours, sits down on its bottom and
then flexes its bicepts at me, then it looks up to me in silent
expectation. "Well! I have never seen a creature like you before." I
say to it in wonderment as I look down at this strange creature in
its small cage whilst I am naked and dripping wet in this shower of
mine. My girlfriend is in the next room of this small flimsey office
unit now. She is sorting things out appearently.
16-8-18
(213) I Wish That I Was In A Band.
Andy and I are out in a pub listening to this band. We are sat next
to each other at a table fooling around pretending to play the
keyboard on this table top. I mimic the sounds of the band that is
playing tonight. I pretend to play their music, as I splay my hands
out to reach those difficult notes on this formica top. Then
suddenly I exclaim, "Where's the keys!" I put my head down until
my face is right up to the formica. So that my nose is nearly
touching it and I take a good close look at my pretend keyboard in
this goofy kind of way. Andy is sat next to me and he pretends to
play his keyboard also. I reach across over to his side of the table
and I pretend to press a button on his pretend keyboard. I keep
looking over to his side of the table to see how he pretends to play
his keyboard and he is really good at it. He is really putting some
thought into his actions. He is concerntrating so hard that he does
not let anything distract him from his imaginary keyboard. Maybe
this is because like me, he is a musician too.
17-8-18
[a h g ]
[h b f ] = A
[g f c ]
----------------------------------------------------------
reference only:
[a b c ]
[d e f ] = M
[g h i ]
19-8-18
20-8-18
21-8-18
(220) I Seek.
My dreams are hiding from me. They watch me from a far, deep
inside my dosey mind. All manner of surrealism swirls around
within this distant place that I struggle to find. My dream friends
they play with me. They tease me with their hide and seek. In
silent demure they watch me, but they never speak. They keep
their eyes on me from this distant space. Deep inside my slumber I
get a glimpse of them from time to time, but they play around
with me. They seem to be so shy. Deep inside my memory, vaugly
in my minds eye.
Show yourself and speak with me and tell me what you know! I do
my inner work but you never seem to show. You always run away
from me. Show yourself, speak to me my dream friends. I love you
from my heart, because you are a part of me, but you are so aloof.
Tell me that you love me. I need to see that proof.
In my waking hours I know that you are still around. Silently I hear
you in a sense that's so profound. You tease me with your gifts of
hope and then you run away. My dream friends I want to see you
in the light of day. Tell me that you love me. This I need to hear
you say. Don't hide from me! Why do you run away?
I Seek.
I take my dad out in his wheelchair. Myself and this lady, I push
him along. I do a nifty little manouver, but I splash him from a
puddle. I make my excuses and I explain myself away, "I was
avoiding that bump when I went into a dip. So I had to turn to the
right to avoid that puddle" I say to my dad in haste. Then I am
suddenly interupted ...
22-8-18
(222) I Am Different.
All the musicians they all sound the same. They sing la la songs in
their own cheeky way, but I am different and I am here to prove to
you all just what they are like by way of contrast. You see I am me
and they are them. I feel their songs essence in a way that is hard
to describe, but they give off this sense a certain vibe. That is hard
to convey just how they all circumscribe. Our own musical way is
as an acoustic song. I play one of my own and it all goes wrong,
but the other songs are fine songs and I sing them out strong.
Their songs are long songs and my songs are fast. They are short
songs of hope, but I come on last. Just to prove that I am different.
By way of contrast.
23-8-18
I say this having used up the biggest pat of butter for render that
has ever been made.
"Maybe this building is just about to fall down and it is only the
land that it stands on that is worth anything. I really do not know. I
would like to find a property that looks like a scone. I would like to
fill it up with butter, strawberry jam and double cream and then I
would like to eat it all up at eleven O'Clock in the morning. I would
wash it down with the largest cup of tea that the world has ever
seen!"
26-8-18
But they will not reveal themselves to me, or maybe I will not
reveal myself to myself. I have this two dimensional visual image
of a white blob in a sky blue background that I shake with my
hand.
I say this to another member of staff, but then there is like an air
of ice cold silence after I have spoken. This silence is only broken
by another staff member whispering to me, "Don't say any more."
I suddenly feel bad and I feel that I have spoken out of turn. That I
have broken a code of conduct somehow. So now I silently think
about what I have just said and I am made to feel guilty.
You see one of our service users who was our responsability stole
a red double decker bus full of other service users. He drove it
around wrecklessly and at speed, knocking things over. I watch the
internal camera footage from this bus. I see all of the other service
users falling around inside as the bus is violently shaken about
whilst it is being driven so badly. This must have been so terrifying
for those people on board, I think to myself and then the gravity
of this whole situation sinks deeply into my mind.
28-8-18
"I have done a bit more work on it." I say to the teacher being a
little disappointed at my own slow progress. The teacher is being a
little careful with this spring loaded device that he is trying to
open. "Just rip it open. If you break it I can soon mend it." I say to
the teacher to encourage him to get into this device.
"I'm not going to break it!" The teacher replies sternly in a gesture
that shows both a bit of responsabilitynand a bit of respect for my
work. Me myself, I am just a little weary at what I have done here
and I have lost some of my interest in this project as it has become
much more difficult to complete. Especially this double loaded
spring lock mechanism that I have designed.
30-8-18
31-8-18
____________________________________________________
August 2018
____________________________________________________
1-8-18
A solvable Quadratic:
x^2-5x+6 = (x-a)(x-b)
**********
a+b=-5
ab=6
**********
-2 + -3 =-5
(-2)(-3)=6
A Solvable Cubic:
*************
a+b+c=-6
ab+bc+ac=11
abc=-6
*************
-1 + -2 + -3 =-6
(-1)(-2)+(-2)(-3)+(-3)(-1)=2+6+3=11
(-1)(-2)(-3)=-6
(x-1)(x-2)(x-3)
(x=1)(x=2)(x=3)
A Solvable Quartic:
Ax^4+Bx^3+Cx^2+Dx+E
******************
a+b+c+d=B
ab+ac+ad+bc+bd+cd=C
abc+abd+acd+bcd=D
abcd=E
******************
(x-a/A)(x-b/A)(x-c/A)(x-d/A)
A Solvable Quintic:
Ax^5+Bx^4+Cx^3+Dx^2+Ex+F
******************
a+b+c+d+e=B
ab+ac+ad+ae+bc+bd+be+cd+ce+de=C
abc+abd+abe+acd+ace+bcd+bce+cde=D
abcd+abce+abde+bcde=E
abcde=F
******************
(x-a/A)(x-b/A)(x-c/A)(x-d/A)(x-e/A)
An Unsolvable Quintic:
y = x^5-10x+2
5(x^2-10^1/2)(x^2+10^1/2)
The graph crosses the x axis once to the left of -2¼, once between
-2¼ and 2¼, and once to the right of 2¼. Therefore y=x^5-10x+2
has 3 real roots and two complex roots.
Ax^5+Bx^4+Cx^3+Dx^2+Ex+F
1x^5+0x^4+0x^3+0x^2+10x+2
******************
B=a+b+c+d+e=0
C=ab+ac+ad+ae+bc+bd+be+cd+ce+de=0
D=abc+abd+abe+acd+ace+bcd+bce+cde=0
E=abcd+abce+abde+bcde=10
F=abcde=2
******************
(x-a/1)(x-b/1)(x-c/1)(x-d/1)(x-e/1)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
B=0
C=(ab=i)+(ac=6)+(ad=i)+(ae=-9)+(bc=2i/3)
+(bd=1/9)+(be=-1)+(cd=-2/3)+(ce=-6)+(de=1)
=[6-9+1/9-1-2/3-6] + [i+i+2i/3]
=-10.'5' + 2.'6'i
D=(abc=-2i)+abd+abe+acd+ace+bcd+bce+cde=0
F=2
Later I find myself in a hut with four others. One of the organisers
comes in with his clip board. He has information on the other four
people but he does not have any information on me. "Don't worry
about it. It makes sense. I am not really a part of this group." I tell
him, but he still radios through to someone to cover his back, to
make sure that I am okay to be left behind. We are all a bit of a
rabble to be honest, but we are all having fun.
Our Familiarity.
2-8-18
I walk home from this gig with my sister and when we almost get
home I see some hands waving at us as if to instruct us to get
down. 'This is very odd.' I think to myself. I notice that my dad is
laid down half hidden in someone's front garden. He waves me
over and instructs me to get down with his hand all at the same
time. My sister Maz by this time is further on up the road. When I
get to my dad he tells me that there is a crazed murdering
madman in the neighbourhood. "Great that is all we need!" I reply
sarcastically to my dad.
"I know that there is one milk left." Says Lisa informatively. I think
about this and I remember seeing a green semi skimmed milk
carton. I think to myself that I will definitely need to go out
shopping soon, only because Lisa is quizzing me on this, otherwise
I would not have thought about food shopping at all. And so the
big question is ... ?
3-8-18
4-8-18
5-8-18
(191) Slow Waters.
Slowly I guide my boat back to shore. This boat bumps onto the
quayside as the waters gently rise and fall. So I have just got back
to this marina and I moor up. I do not know where I have been as I
reflect into these waters. As I trance out and stare into the light
that flickers upon this surface swell. As I listen to these waters lap
upon the side of my boat, that bobs about slowly afloat.
Trapped In My Room.
(193) Mr Quench.
I am out on the town and I am stood talking to this lass. There is a
lad sat outside a pub who we have a brief chat with also. He is sat
at a pub bench and after he has had a chat with us I notice that he
gets deeply involved with his writing. He has his head down
scribbling away. I notice that he has a newspaper with him also
and I wonder what he is writing.
There are some big old Victorian houses here that have been
converted into flats. They have stone steps outside their front
doors. As we are chatting, this lass and I, we notice two lads
walking down some of these stone steps. But one of these lads
has coke cans fixed to his clothes. He is covered in coke cans all
over his jacket, all over his jeans, there are these coke cans held
within special pockets just big enough for coke cans to fit into. We
both find ourselves looking at this lad walking down these stone
steps with his friend and he is really struggling. He is really
encumbered with the weight of all these coke cans.
"I think that he has a problem there." I point out to this lass as we
get distracted from our conversation.
6-8-18
I am walking along down the path next to the road with this bloke.
I notice a woman outside her front garden pottering around, when
I am suddenly aware that the bloke who was walking along the
road with me has vanished. I look further and I notice that he is
hastily walking off, before he hides behind some bins. It is then
that I remember that he owes some money to the butcher. I
wonder to myself, 'Maybe she is that butcher.'
It is ages before she goes into her house. I am standing there and
then when I think that she has finished in her garden. I tell the
bloke with hand signals that it is all clear. Only for her to pop back
up in her garden again. So then I have to tell him to get back, but
eventually she goes back into her house. By this time Lisa has seen
this bloke who is called Dave. Lisa and Dave are best friends. So
now all three of us are able to walk past this woman's house and
this is when I realise that somehow I have gotten involved in
Dave's drama.
7-8-18
8-8-18
(200) Unconscionably.
I am not sure what I am doing. I think a lot about what I should do
here. I get prepared and I think about all that I should do in this
time.
"Sorry?" I say, as I make sure that I listen to her more carefully this
time.
a^2/x^2 + b^2/y^2 = 1
a^2/x^2 + b^2/y^2 = 1
11-8-18
Out in the garden he is fixed to a tree with his bits and bobs and a
drill, as far as I can see. He does his little jobs in no time, but then
he is stuck up in a tree. He is a strange little man as far as I can
see. "Don't bring me down." He says, as he is only three foot two,
stuck up in that tree with nothing better to do. He is being guided
in such a dull dull light, as he gets himself around within this dark
dark night. He is such a dull dull man and there is something not
quite right. It is not just about his little height. He acts a little
strange and he is an unusual sight. He is that little man who is just
not quite right.
"Don't Bring Me Down."
This poem above is sourced from a dream that was a little creepy.
I wrote this dream up as soon as I woke up from my dream. I was
all bleary eyed and between the sleep state and wakefulness
when I wrote this dream up. This was a dream that gave me chills
down my spine. It has been so very difficult to put words to this
dream as, as in many dreams it was very surreal and so very much
out of this physical world, but after a lot of deliberation and care
the above poem is the best account that I can give.
12-8-18
The musical opportunity with Mark is not the stave pipework that
I am currently on now, but a much cleaner and simpler musical
experience to ratchet up, because it is more of a single solid bar
which is much thinner and made up from stainless steel. It runs
along horizontally in a thin clean silvery grey colour which is quite
impressive really. This is how I see it anyway. It is within a circle of
my mind at this moment of time, because it is a figment of my
imagination at this moment in time. You see I have a thing about
my timing and the time signatures that I keep and that I use. So
this is something that I am really interested in looking into.
So one day I am out for a walk in the park, when this professor is
so rude as to push past in front of me. And as he does so he falls
down hard. He bangs his head on the wall of a bouncy castle that
has been inflated in the park. I am in shock and a man in the park
points his finger at me, "He pushed him!" He shouts out accusing
me of causing the professor to fall. The man shouts this out just as
the professors head bounces back up off the bouncy castle wall.
The professor then replies in an instant, "Oh no he didn't." And
with that the professor dashes up the bandstand steps in front of
me. Eager to get on with the work of the day and I carry on with
my walk in the park, untroubled and relaxed and with nothing to
say.
13-8-18
So if no number greater than one and less than 24 divides into 619
to give an integer answer then 619 is a prime number.
A is the value being investigated (619).
m is the values between 1 and 24.
x is the value to the left of the decimal point.
y is the value to the right of the decimal point.
(If y equals zero in any of the answers below then A is not a prime
number.)
*The asterisk indicates where m is a prime number.
A/m=x.y
619/2*=309.5
619/3*=206.'3'rec
619/4=154.75
619/5*=123.8
619/6=103.1'6'rec
619/7*=88.'428571'rec
619/8=77.375
619/9=68.'7'rec
619/10=61.9
619/11*=56.'27'rec
619/12=51.58'3'rec
619/13*=47.'615384'rec
619/14=44.2142857143 to 10 d.p.
619/15=41.2'6'rec
619/16=38.6875
619/17*=36.4117647059 to 10 d.p.
619/18=34.3'8'rec
619/19*=32.5789473684 to 10 d.p.
619/20=30.95
619/21=29.'476190'rec
619/22=28.1'36'rec
619/23*=26.9130434783 to 10 d.p.
There is no y value above that is equal to zero and so this is proof
that 619 is a prime number.
14-8-18
(210) Why?
There is a lot of pillocking about. Two people jump on me and
start writing on my head. I get them back immediately in anger. I
get some ink on their heads too. I lose my patience with them.
Violently and angrily I pen and ink their heads, to get my revenge
on them. I press on hard on their scalp with my pen. So now we all
look a right mess. I still have to get my jobs done here with all this
graffiti on my head. My mum is not happy with me. I get told off
by her for my behaviour. I get a good dressing down by her for
what I have done back in anger and for letting those people write
on my head. This writing on peoples heads has gotten well out of
hand now. I feel self conscious as I push bike through the streets
with black ink scribble on my head. It hurts too when people
scribble on your head. It is like a monkey scrub. When people
scrub their knuckles on your scalp and you know how painful that
is! I do not know how this all started. I feel that I have been
attacked for no reason. I am annoyed that people just go around
scribbling around on other peoples heads. Why do they do that?
15-8-18
"You have got some muscles you have." I say to this small creature
in its cage. As it gets up off all fours, sits down on its bottom and
then flexies its biceps at me, then it looks up to me in silent
expectation. "Well! I have never seen a creature like you before." I
say to it in wonderment as I look down at this strange creature in
its small cage whilst I am naked and dripping wet in this shower of
mine. My girlfriend is in the next room of this small flimsy office
unit now. She is sorting things out apparently.
(212) Too Much For Me Now.
I go into my channelings and I pick up some new energies that I
have never picked up before. All the chatter goes into such a high
vibration until I just cannot understand what I hear anymore. I do
not make out on a human level the messages that I receive
anymore. So these new messages that I get now I decide to leave,
because they are too much for me now, for sure.
16-8-18
17-8-18
(214) Sober Thoughts.
I meet this new woman in a new place. Not too far away. In
another physical time space. In another space-time dimension.
Because this is a new way of playing and this is a new way of
thinking. Cheers to all those people drinking and sinking so deep.
Deep down into those densities. So here I am thinking that I am
the only one, who does not do drugs. Those drugs that actively
hug you into an addictive relationship. Those drugs that hug you
into submission, on a trip. On a pub mission's pissed up
permission slip.
Sober Thoughts.
[a h g ]
[h b f ] = A
[g f c ]
----------------------------------------------------------
reference only:
[a b c ]
[d e f ] = M
[g h i ]
19-8-18
20-8-18
21-8-18
(220) I Seek.
My dreams are hiding from me. They watch me from a far, deep
inside my dosey mind. All manner of surrealism swirls around
within this distant place that I struggle to find. My dream friends
they play with me. They tease me with their hide and seek. In
silent demure they watch me, but they never speak. They keep
their eyes on me from this distant space. Deep inside my slumber I
get a glimpse of them from time to time, but they play around
with me. They seem to be so shy. Deep inside my memory,
vaguely in my minds eye.
Show yourself and speak with me and tell me what you know! I do
my inner work but you never seem to show. You always run away
from me. Show yourself, speak to me my dream friends. I love you
from my heart, because you are a part of me, but you are so aloof.
Tell me that you love me. I need to see that proof.
In my waking hours I know that you are still around. Silently I hear
you in a sense that's so profound. You tease me with your gifts of
hope and then you run away. My dream friends I want to see you
in the light of day. Tell me that you love me. This I need to hear
you say. Don't hide from me! Why do you run away?
I Seek.
In my waking hours
I know that you are still around.
Silently I hear you
in a sense that's so profound.
You tease me with your gifts of hope
and then you run away.
My dream friends I want to see you
in the light of day.
Tell me that you love me.
This I need to hear you say.
Don't hide from me!
Why do you run away?
I take my dad out in his wheelchair. Myself and this lady, I push
him along. I do a nifty little manoeuvre, but I splash him from a
puddle. I make my excuses and I explain myself away, "I was
avoiding that bump when I went into a dip. So I had to turn to the
right to avoid that puddle" I say to my dad in haste. Then I am
suddenly interrupted ...
22-8-18
(222) I Am Different.
All the musicians they all sound the same. They sing la la songs in
their own cheeky way, but I am different and I am here to prove to
you all just what they are like by way of contrast. You see I am me
and they are them. I feel their songs essence in a way that is hard
to describe, but they give off this sense a certain vibe. That is hard
to convey just how they all circumscribe. Our own musical way is
as an acoustic song. I play one of my own and it all goes wrong,
but the other songs are fine songs and I sing them out strong.
Their songs are long songs and my songs are fast. They are short
songs of hope, but I come on last. Just to prove that I am different.
By way of contrast.
23-8-18
24-8-18
I say this having used up the biggest pat of butter for render that
has ever been made.
"Maybe this building is just about to fall down and it is only the
land that it stands on that is worth anything. I really do not know. I
would like to find a property that looks like a scone. I would like to
fill it up with butter, strawberry jam and double cream and then I
would like to eat it all up at eleven O'Clock in the morning. I would
wash it down with the largest cup of tea that the world has ever
seen!"
26-8-18
"You people, you squarely freak me out! You people, you squarely
freak me out!"
But they will not reveal themselves to me, or maybe I will not
reveal myself to myself. I have this two dimensional visual image
of a white blob in a sky blue background that I shake with my
hand.
I say this to another member of staff, but then there is like an air
of ice cold silence after I have spoken. This silence is only broken
by another staff member whispering to me, "Don't say any more."
I suddenly feel bad and I feel that I have spoken out of turn. That I
have broken a code of conduct somehow. So now I silently think
about what I have just said and I am made to feel guilty.
You see one of our service users who was our responsibility stole a
red double decker bus full of other service users. He drove it
around wrecklessly and at speed, knocking things over. I watch the
internal camera footage from this bus. I see all of the other service
users falling around inside as the bus is violently shaken about
whilst it is being driven so badly. This must have been so terrifying
for those people on board, I think to myself and then the gravity
of this whole situation sinks deeply into my mind.
28-8-18
"I have done a bit more work on it." I say to the teacher being a
little disappointed at my own slow progress. The teacher is being a
little careful with this spring loaded device that he is trying to
open. "Just rip it open. If you break it I can soon mend it." I say to
the teacher to encourage him to get into this device.
"I'm not going to break it!" The teacher replies sternly in a gesture
that shows both a bit of responsibility and a bit of respect for my
work. Me myself, I am just a little weary at what I have done here
and I have lost some of my interest in this project as it has become
much more difficult to complete. Especially this double loaded
spring lock mechanism that I have designed.
30-8-18
31-8-18
(232) Our Reunion. (The Three 'A Me Goes.')
I meet up with some of my old friends like Shane and Tomo in
Lincoln. For some reason we go out for a bike ride. Tomo instructs
me on the best way to push bike into Lincoln. I am a bit dubious
about his advice, although I have not been out in Lincoln for such
a long time and I am reremembering old routes to cycle down, but
some of these routes have been blocked off. I nearly come off my
bike at one point. "That is because I have not been out on my
push bike lately." I conclude to Tomo and Shane. "Although I went
out on it a little yesterday." I suddenly remember correcting
myself. I say this out of shock from having nearly fallen off my
bike.
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September 2018
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