What Is The Most Statistically Improbable Thing To Happen To You - AskReddit

12/6/2018 What is the most statistically improbable thing to happen to you?
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What is the most statistically
3603 improbable thing to happen to you?
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Submitted on 05 Dec 2018
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[–] SugarHigh4me 2340 points 17 hours ago
When at college we had old style (plug in) phones

Rules:
in each of our rooms. Never used them, didn't (hover for more info)
even know the number. One day mine rang, I
picked it up and some old guy was asking for a You must post a clear and direct question
in the title. The title may contain two,
Phillip. I told him that, no, there wasn't a Phillip short, necessary context sentences. No
here - but this old guys voice sounded really 1
text is allowed in the textbox. Your
familiar, like really really familiar, like I was 90% thoughts/responses to the question can
go in the comments section. more >>
sure, so I asked,
"Grandpa? *(Insert grandpa's full name)? Is that
Any post asking for advice should be
you?". (It was) 2 generic and not specific to your situation
Turns out he was trying to call an old friend, and alone. more >>
had been pressing 2 instead of 5 when dialling the

number ie 2782 387 instead of 5785 387. And it 3
Askreddit is for open-ended discussion
questions. more >>
happened to be the phone number to my room.
permalink embed save report reply
Posting, or seeking, any identifying
[–] rushaz 343 points 10 hours ago personal information, real or fake, will
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12/6/2018 What is the most statistically improbable thing to happen to you? : AskReddit
Old style plug in phones.... 4 result in a ban without a prior warning.

more >>
get off my lawn ya damn kids!!
permalink embed save parent report reply
Askreddit is not your soapbox, personal
5
army, or advertising platform. more >>
[–] Crazy-Calm 30 points 7 hours ago
Seriously, I used to have one that you stuck

Questions seeking professional advice
your finger in, and spun it around! are inappropriate for this subreddit and
6
permalink embed save parent report reply will be removed. more >>
[–] hoyohoyo9 22 points 7 hours ago

Soliciting money, goods, services, or
psh that was just an ipod grandpa 7
favours is not allowed. more >>
Mods reserve the right to remove content

load more comments (4 replies)
or restrict users' posting privileges as
8 necessary if it is deemed detrimental to
the subreddit or to the experience of
[–] DiscordFish 151 points 9 hours ago others. more >>
Not as crazy, but my grandfather dialed my
number wrong and ended up calling my Comment replies consisting solely of
9
coworker instead. When he came into work the images will be removed. more >>
next day he was like "something weird
happened last night and some old guy called If you think your post has disappeared, see
me and asked if I was u/DiscordFish." I said spam or an inappropriate post, please do
"Wait, my grandpa was supposed to call me not hesitate to contact the mods, we're
happy to help.
last night and never did, what's your number?"
And that's how I learned my coworker's
number was my number but with 2 digits
switched around. Tags to use:
[Serious]
Use a [Serious] post tag to designate

load more comments (12 replies) your post as a serious, on-topic-only
thread.
[–] quats5 6259 points 23 hours ago
I was telling my coworkers about an interesting

customer of mine from a month before, who Filter posts by subject:
looked like a hobo but bought a very nice product
and talked about his international travels, to Mod posts Serious posts
remind them not to judge customers on

appearances only. Right as I finished the story, he Megathread Breaking news
walked in to buy another identical one as backup.

Unfilter
Cue a month or so later and I was telling the story
again to a different coworker, with the update that
he’d appeared as if summoned the last time...
AND YET AGAIN he walked in right on the heels of Do you have ideas or feedback for
Askreddit? Submit to /r/Ideasforaskreddit.
my story about him, to buy again.
...he’s probably standing at the locked door of the
closed store now since I told the story again....
permalink embed save report reply Please use spoiler tags to hide spoilers.
>!insert spoiler here!<
[–] YeetMcManus 2484 points 21 hours ago
i’m like 90% sure that it’s a wizard who’s

fucking with you Other subreddits you might like:
Ask Others Self & Others
[–] Letalis_ 614 points 15 hours ago
A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He Find a subreddit Learn something

arrives precisely when he means to.
permalink embed save parent report reply Meta Subs What is this ___
load more comments (7 replies) AskReddit Offshoots Offers & Assistance
[–] Xpert_on 137 points 16 hours ago

Ever read the reddiquette? Take a peek!
Whenever mentioned he shall be
summoned.
css by qtx a community for 10 years

MODERATORS MESSAGE THE MODERATORS

krispykrackers
flyryan
[–] bluesblue1 145 points 15 hours ago Ooer
canipaybycheck
He’s future you who got rich after discovering
roastedbagel
time travel and is just fucking with you ani625
permalink embed save parent report reply TheJackal8
sexrockandroll
load more comments (3 replies) e36
IranianGenius
...and 18 more »
[–] Uoop 79 points 13 hours ago
Was it my brother? He works for a company < > discussions in r/AskReddit X

that makes him travel around the world, and 33.9k · 11460 comments
dresses like a hobo, when he's home. He was What’s a super-useful item one should carry
telling a story about how he was short a few with them at all times, since you never know
you could need it?
cents on something and the lady behind him
gave him the correct change before he could
pull out his debt card.
The dude bought (and paid off) his own 2 story
house with a pool and acre of land before he
was 26.
[–] stegblobirl 300 points 21 hours ago
Or perhaps he’s standing now out in front of your home’s door. And this time, there will
be blood.
[–] quats5 87 points 20 hours ago
Eep. I’m not looking.

[–] wmorris33026 4211 points 20 hours ago
I lost my wallet one night partying in redondo beach. About a month later I was sitting
down on some big boulders that make up the breakwater again in redonda and I looked
down by my feet and there was my wallet, sitting there water logged on one of the rocks.
Nothing missing out of it. About a year later, the same wallet goes missing again. I’m like
wtf is going on? No idea. So a month later, I’m in a rando grocery store and the cashier
sorta recognizes me and says “hey stay right here”. She goes over to an office and comes
back with my wallet. Nothing missing. Had all my cash still there.
[–] fearlessAppetite 2146 points 18 hours ago
that is one loyal wallet :D

[–] WeightsWithSquee 1428 points 16 hours ago
Then he threw it in a volcano. 10 years later, bought some lava rock and dropped it.
The rock split open and there was his wallet. Nothing missing.
[–] david_bazooka 243 points 16 hours ago
anomalous wallet
[–] exactlythatpedantic 278 points 15 hours ago
Item #: SCP-w5l3t Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures:

Unnecessary
[–] repodepohippo 99 points 13 hours ago
Sounds like you could use this wallet as containment for scps
[–] EverChillingLucifer 54 points 13 hours ago
Subject used to contain a container that contains all containers.

We are currently on the thirteenth universe reboot because of it,
scientists estimate.
[–] Lars_lars_lars 90 points 15 hours ago
Hurry up and lose it again so we can see what happens next!

[–] wmorris33026 44 points 15 hours ago
Ever since then and I’m older now in my 50s I take a picture of my cards and ID and
I keep a spare credit card with my passport card and some cash set aside. I travel a
lot so I keep it my backpack. I can’t imagine losing all ID and cards in a strange city
no food, no car, no hotel and no access to flights. That would freak me out. O mean
wth would you do? You’d be living on the streets with no address...
[–] Thiago270398 49 points 13 hours ago
My best guess is go to the nearest embassy, at least you can cry on someone's
shoulder in your native language.
load more comments (1 reply)
[–] ObamasRetirementPlan 3150 points 22 hours ago
Opened a beer while sitting around a bonfire, threw the cap in the fire and it bounced in the
air off a log and landed on top of my friends beer. We just froze. I don’t even want to know
the chances of making that happen again.
[–] as_one_does 662 points 15 hours ago
I once saw a penny fall end over end and land on edge like it had been stuck there by a
magnet. This was on a linoleum floor dropped from about mid chest height. I couldn't
even detect a bounce it just kind of stuck.
[–] AwakenMirror 126 points 14 hours ago
Kain and Raziel are getting off on what you just wrote.
[–] theprisefighter 45 points 13 hours ago
A wild Legacy of Kain reference?! What a good morning!

[–] pocketfrisbee 122 points 14 hours ago
Imagine how many cool things like this don’t get filmed. I wish I could see this.
[–] Hawkmek 90 points 14 hours ago
I know, all we have on YouTube are idiots trying to do back flips for some reason.
[–] Cotillionb 1350 points 14 hours ago
It's a shame coming to these threads late... I have a good one!

When I was still dating my wife, she was on vacation with her parents in Cancun and her
flight was cancelled due to a storm. She had a hugely important job interview coming up
and no one in the airport could get her on a flight home in time. She called me, frantic, from
her hotel asking me to help.
So, I went on the airport website and found a single first-class ticket to fly to JFK that same
night. I bought it, knowing it might not still be available after calling my then-girlfriend to
confirm. $1,400 later, I call her hotel in Cancun only to find she and her parents have
checked out and are nowhere to be found. This was quite a while ago, so they did not have
cell phones with international plans.
Now freaking out more than a little, I call both the hotel and the airport multiple times
trying to get in touch with her. No luck. So I Google to see if there are any other numbers
listed for the airport, where I assume she must be, and I come across a crappy looking little
website listing what it claims to be the phone numbers of a bank of pay phones in the
airport.
I called the first number on that list of pay phones. It rings for a while, and someone picks
up. It's my wife's voice. In the middle of a Mexican airport jam-packed with stuck travelers,
she overheard that exact payphone ringing and happened to pick it up.
I passed her all the flight details, spoke again with the airport to confirm she could board.
She got on the flight to JFK with 15 minutes to spare. She now tells this story as the day
she decided to marry me.
Oh yeah, and she got the job.
[–] molly__hatchet 109 points 12 hours ago
That's a really good one!

[–] peekosama 75 points 11 hours ago
Just how, man this thread is so much fun, very good story
[–] Cotillionb 63 points 10 hours ago
It's funny... the part I find so unbelievable even years later isn't her picking up the
payphone, although that probably is the craziest part. Rather, it's that I scrolled
through multiple pages of Google results and happened upon that specific payphone
number!
[–] Off_Tangent 4240 points 1 day ago
Not me, a friend.

He was very depressed and became a hermit, picking up agoraphobic fears. He was
convinced bad things happen when he leaves the house. Usually referring to injuries or mes
sups that did happen to him.
Myself and others convinced him to take a college class just to get out of the house 3 hours
a week. He already had a college degree, even from an ivy league school.
It was an elective class, only 15 people. The only thing he had to do for the class was a
group project with two other people. One member never showed up, so he spent all his time
with the other student.
The partner was a transfer from one of those good California schools. My friend bonded with
him in class. Things were looking up for my friend's morale.
3 days before they were set to present, the entire college shut down because of a murder.
His partner was the culprit.
My friend was called in for questioning, but that's it. The other student was found guilty and
is now sitting out a life sentence.
If that wasn't enough, we convinced my friend to take another class at a different college
the following semester.
He became friendly with the kid that sat next to him. A month in, the other student went
missing, then found dead. Authorities say it was a suicide.
We're not making him take anymore classes. He hasn't left the house since.
[–] BumKnickle 612 points 16 hours ago
> He hasn't left the house since
Poor guy
[–] mvtheg 410 points 13 hours ago
I have a friend who unfortunately has a lot of mental issues. Some of these stem from
irrational paranoid delusions. He had lots of them, some were clichéd like 'the
government is tracking me' and others were things like 'ATMs keep printing out
messages on my receipts.'
So one day we are walking down the street together and he starts having one of his
episodes. He's telling me that people keep throwing food at him. Just as I'm trying to
reason with him and tell him it cant be true, a loaf of bread falls on top of his head. We
look up and there is no one there, and to this day I couldn't tell you where it came from.
It got me thinking what if he was telling the truth the whole time?
[–] user-o-reddit 85 points 12 hours ago
I hope your friend is being treated. If not, he needs to go to a psychiatrist. It sound

like he is schizophrenic, which can be extremely debilitating and gets worse when
not treated.
Just had to say something bc mental illness is something not to overlook
Cool story though
[–] mvtheg 51 points 12 hours ago
He has been in and out of psychiatric hospitals for about a decade now. Even
with treatment it has seemed to get worse and worse.
Its actually quite sad watching someone deteriorate in front of your eyes and not
being able to help. Especially when you remember what they used to be like.
Thanks for the concern though.
[–] dilutedpotato 1152 points 23 hours ago
Tell him to buy a lottery ticket. Seriously tho that's pretty sad
[–] stegblobirl 1654 points 20 hours ago
Why? So the lottery ticket can get murdered too?

[–] ChiefPyroManiac 306 points 20 hours ago
And then he cam collect on the insurance money, duh.

[–] 1982throwaway1 227 points 18 hours ago
I was thinking he could win -137,000,000 dollars.

Dudes got shit luck. i wouldn't leave the house either.
[–] RobotCaesar 320 points 17 hours ago
"we are sorry sir, we don't really understand it either but it says here that
you owe us 137 million"
"Seems all your numbers were picked but in the exact opposite order."
[–] Cornish_Pirate 54 points 17 hours ago*
Sounds like the kind of person that will randomly choose numbers and end up with 4
8 15 16 23 42
Edit: 42 not 43
[–] Stiouxy 160 points 17 hours ago
Probably killed the group member that never showed up.

[–] thatslifeknife 45 points 14 hours ago
we've all wished we could...

[–] MuchoGustoMeLlamo 127 points 15 hours ago
Wow. Poor dude. I've got a couple people I'd like him to meet.
[–] kevon87 97 points 17 hours ago
"Dude, did you desecrate an Indian burial ground or something?"

[–] Zambeezi 77 points 15 hours ago
Ummm, I think your friend is a murderer...

[+] [deleted] 1 day ago (45 children)
[–] FlyForDollars 535 points 13 hours ago*
My father and I are both airline pilots. Early one morning I am working a flight from
Louisville to Detroit and he is going from Columbus to Chicago. It’s quiet on the radios at
that early hour when ATC calls out some traffic for us to look for, and us to another aircraft.
When I hear my dad answer the radio. Shortly after that, he says hi to me, and I reply with
“Hi Dad”. Then we passed directly over his aircraft by 1000 feet. One of the coolest
moments of my flying career to date.
Follow up: Thanks for all the support. It means a lot to know people find it as cool as I did.
It was a pretty significant moment for me because I was a little asshole when I was young
and flying and our shared love for aviation was what really made my Dad and my
relationship take off (pun intended) .
[–] SubjectPhase 46 points 9 hours ago
This is great.
[–] belalugosi944 18 points 7 hours ago
wholesome AF
[–] KokonutMonkey 5570 points 1 day ago
I went to a small university in the midwest, less than 6000 students.

I bumped into an old classmate one day. On a train in southern Japan.
[–] firthy [ ] 1701 points 18 hours ago
My cousin is Canadian, I'm British so haven't seen him in 30 years, and anyway he
spent a lot of time in New Zealand running a ski resort. Me going up in a ski lift in Aspen
one year, chat to the stranger next to me who said he'd skied in New Zealand recently.
"Oh" says I, "my cousin is involved with a resort in New Zealand".
"What's his name?"
"Mike ******" says I
"I was his best man at his wedding last year..."
[–] Secure_Physics 1829 points 20 hours ago
I've posted it before, but it's pretty funny, so here we go again. I was watching
America's Funniest Home Videos, back when Bob Saget hosted, while eating pretzels
and drinking diet black cherry soda. Saget led into the commercial break by saying,
"don't put down those pretzels and diet black cherry soda, we'll be right back!" I almost
choked.
[–] Nuker707 528 points 19 hours ago
you better make sure there is no Bob Saget in your house

[–] girlgiirlgiiirl 136 points 17 hours ago
The original Shia LaBeouf

[–] Oakroscoe 269 points 18 hours ago
I can’t believe I’ve read you posting this before.

[–] mossattacks 70 points 17 hours ago
My thought exactly lol

[–] assraider420 115 points 17 hours ago
One time adult swim did one of there white text on black background things and it
read “If our calculations are correct, you are currently masterbating and regret that
you never knew your great grandparents “ needless to say their calculations were
correct.
[–] PoliteAnarchist 114 points 19 hours ago
So this happens to my fiancé all the time.

My favourite is the time he saw an old high school friend of his in line to enter the
Colosseum in Rome on a random Sunday morning in May, so hardly even tourist season,
and not during a university break period. We're also all from New Zealand and had no
idea the other was travelling at the time.
We also meet old work mates of his in all sorts of other places. Always in different cities
to where we all live and on arbitrary days of the week at arbitrary times.
[–] hits_from_the_booong 116 points 1 day ago
this is trippy
[–] robin20kk 139 points 19 hours ago
I'm not sure if it's statistical, but it was damn near impossible to do if I ever tried to.
I was driving down the freeway at about 70 mph. It was at night and there was only
one car on freeway ahead of me and one behind me. The car ahead of me suddenly
slams on his brakes and swerved to the side. The freeway was fairly well lit, but I
couldn't see what made him do that. I assume he must have dropped his cigarette
in is lap or something. I had slowed down a bit and was covering the brake just in
case. Suddenly, I see a huge truck tire fall from the sky and bounce right back up
again, leapfrogging my car completely. It hit the road about 20 feet in front of my
car (or so it seemed). I couldn't really tell. I freaked out and hit my brakes hard, but
that was pointless as the thing was gone before I even had a chance to react. I
watched my rear view as the tire went off the side of the road and into the fence
where it wobbled out of view.
I know that nobody can believe it, and I even wonder if it actually happened.
[–] alreadynutz 2400 points 1 day ago
someone with multiple felonies has my same birthday to the year and first, middle and last
name as well as the same eye color and height in my state. it makes all background checks
a big pain the ass as well as renewing any official documents like my drivers license.
[–] Korprat_Amerika 466 points 19 hours ago
Same here as far as first middle and last name but at least we are of different races.
Easy enough to clear up when I get asked to step out of the car, but for real it scared
the shit out of me the first time I was told I had felony warrants.
[–] VTArmsDealer 147 points 16 hours ago
I used to work at a gun shop where something like this happened. Submitted the
background, got the secret call from state police saying to hold him there, and when
police showed up it was the wrong guy too. Sucks for that guy. Every time he gets run
in NICS his background will at least be delayed.
[–] gornzilla 774 points 22 hours ago
Change your name. It sucks, but it will make your life easier.
[–] DirtyPrancin 1130 points 19 hours ago
Change the middle name. It's inconsequential and will differentiate the records.
[–] AndyBirger 488 points 17 hours ago
Or add a second middle name, if that's a possibility where you live.

[–] clunkclunk 1791 points 17 hours ago
Charles NOT A MURDERER Smith.

[–] Oldcheese 471 points 17 hours ago
This will also automatically win a court case if the judge reads your full
name aloud. /r/UnethicalLifeProTips
[–] torn-ainbow 484 points 15 hours ago
Robert Case Dismissed Jones.

[–] BobsBarker12 219 points 14 hours ago
"You heard the judge it's a wrap." -Reddit user, moments before
being tackled on the way out.
[–] suenrg 37 points 13 hours ago
sql injection in real life

[–] erabrom 28 points 16 hours ago
The internet rarely makes me laugh out loud anymore, so thank you
[–] BrotherProsciutto 161 points 17 hours ago
guys guys guys, these are all great ideas, but he could simply track this
felonies man and kill him. Problem solved.
[–] Mierh 61 points 19 hours ago
Or will that make it even more suspicious

[–] thiscakeissmashed 241 points 17 hours ago
I bought a family reunion T-shirt (not my family) at a thrift store outside Houston. Two
years later at Northwestern University outside Chicago I was wearing the shirt, and I ran
into a guy in the dining hall wearing the same shirt. He was also not in the family.
[–] CurnanBarbarian 35 points 10 hours ago
I imagine someone making a bunch of family reunion t shirts with a photo he just found
somewhere and distributing them to second hand shops
[–] dannykings37 1214 points 20 hours ago
My friend and I were talking about an upperclassman in our gym class that had an ankle
monitor on, and I mentioned that it seems like all he talks about is food and saying fuck. We
both decided to pause for a second and eaves drop on his conversation and all we heard
was "fucking meatball sandwich" Definitely not the most statistically improbably thing to
happen to me, but still my favorite example of perfect timing
[–] zangor 285 points 13 hours ago
Damn, how hard did you guys laugh. I would have had tears in my eyes.
[–] dannykings37 148 points 13 hours ago
I still laugh when I think about it

[–] vagsicles 1373 points 22 hours ago
I had a police helicopter light me up in my car with the spotlight and red and blue lights.
Pulled over and waited for what I assumed was a swat team coming to get me. Waited 10
mins and then the lights went off and it flew away.
The statistically improbable part is that I was selling weed and had just made a drop. So I
thought I was done for. Nope.... Never found out why they lit me up.
[–] chewymilk02 1300 points 17 hours ago
“Damn this is a boring shift. Hey you know what’ll be funny...?”

[–] WreakingHavoc640 153 points 16 hours ago
Hahahahahahahaha
[–] Tainavaa 58 points 15 hours ago
-Officer Branson
[–] xYokai 481 points 14 hours ago
Imagine being busted by a heli for selling weed lmaoo

[–] crowe_1 1433 points 22 hours ago
I used to work at a call centre in a small city in Canada. I did internet tech support for about
eleven states in the US. One night I get a call like any other from someone whose internet
isn’t working.
While waiting for a form to process, I start making small talk with this guy whose name isn’t
familiar. He asks where I’m located, which is a common question people ask when they’re
trying to kill time. I say the name of the city and the province, which usually evokes a
response of “Oh wow, that’s pretty far away!”
But this guy, he responds, kind of surprised, that his in-laws are vacationing in my province.
He says they’re only an hour or so from my city in this small town that he can’t quite
remember the name of. We chat a little more about my city, and he mentions a few
landmarks he’s been told about. All of a sudden, he remembers the name of the town his in-
laws are staying. It’s a tiny town of about 800 people. Pretty quaint.
And it’s my home town.
The town this guy’s in-laws we’re staying at was the town I grew up in—the town where my
parents and most of my extended family still reside to this day. I immediately share my
surprise with the guy. I can tell by his tone that he doesn’t buy it but I don’t call him out for
it. So he mentions the last name of the family his in-laws are staying with and my jaw
nearly drops.
It’s the last name of my best friend, who I’ve known for 20 years and am living with at that
point.
I name drop a few of his relatives to prove my story to the guy on the phone. He is as
blown away as me.
Turns out he is married to my best friend’s cousin, and I had hung out at the house his in-
laws—my friend’s aunt and uncle—were staying at back home just the summer before.
Tl;dr: Working at a call centre that services tens of millions of people in another country, I
get a call from my best friend’s cousin-in-law.
[–] Clumbo94 331 points 19 hours ago*
I also used to work at a call centre and had something similar happen to me.
Whilst waiting for a payment to process, recognising the accent & address as being close
to the football (soccer) team I support, making small talk I asked him if he liked
football, and what team he supported.
Turns out we supported the same team.. not only that, he went to the same game (A
local rivalry, a huge deal in the UK) that I went to a couple of days before. A couple of
rows behind me.
I know this as he said some drunken idiot (me) fell down the stairs in the concourse
spilling three pints of beer. Never told him it was me, we both laughed and that was it,
next customer.
Edit: formatting
[–] Dysbulia 1501 points 1 day ago
the inside of my car burned up on the EXACT DAY a recall came out warning people of faulty
interior wiring. It was fully covered.
[–] Kaleido88 275 points 20 hours ago
Lucky. I had a car that had a faulty ECU from factory so every once in a while it would
run like shit out of nowhere and stall, then be totally fine. I spent hundreds at the dealer
on multiple occasions while they tried to track down the problem, and they couldn't
figure it out. A year later, the recall for that ECU came out, but I'd already gotten rid of
the car at that point.
[–] retzonian 2257 points 21 hours ago
I constantly and randomly win gaming systems.

When the original PlayStation released, my grandpa was working at Best Buy. They had a
Christmas party for employees and family where you could donate a diecast car for a chance
to win. I donated one and managed to win.
PS2 came out and a local news channel was holding a giveaway. All you had to do to enter
was send a card in with your information. Christmas was pretty cool that year too.
When the XB360 released, they had one in one of the Stacker games like you see in
arcades. You know, the rigged ones that nobody wins on? Yeah, you guessed it. Happened
on my cousin's birthday too!
Finally, my XB1. Signed up online for a giveaway. I figured since the odds were so high
against me, I should buy one. So I did. About 6 weeks later they held the drawing, and I'm
now the proud owner of two XB1s.
Yeah, can't wait for the Next gen consoles to release.
TL;DR: Haven't had to buy a game system since 1995 thanks to random drawings and
contests.
[–] CaptainPoverty 728 points 17 hours ago
well my story about randomly catching a fly seems inconsequential now

[–] Hawkmek 261 points 14 hours ago
Tell us more spider man.

[–] Susim-the-Housecat 230 points 17 hours ago
... have you thought about buying a couple of lottery tickets?

[–] Maarrgghk 232 points 15 hours ago
It'll only work if the lottery machine can play Skyrim.

[–] DoctorPepster 89 points 13 hours ago
Todd Howard, you've done it again.

[–] GilbertLeChat 583 points 22 hours ago
I run into the same Ukrainian guy every time I go to the Vegas airport. He was my
roommate briefly in college and since then it’s happened three times.
[–] TheSoundOfTastyYum 322 points 17 hours ago
the Vegas airport

... sigh... ok, I’ll be the one to say it...
What are the odds?!
[–] arincon9 673 points 21 hours ago
First day of fourth grade a guy and I were confused because we both have the same name
and last name, no middle name. Had to deal with that through elementary and middle
school.He goes to the same college as me and back in the day we were pretty good friends.
An annoying thing is that we'd get each other's papers, grades, Test scores handed to each
other. Just from habit I know his old school ID number to this day, as well as his birthday
lmao. Even a couple years back a guy sent me a message on FB saying that I'll be his
roommate but I live at home. I immediately knew he was talking about the other guy and
gave the other guy's account.
[–] Zahndethus 187 points 15 hours ago
When I was in fourth grade, there were two students with the exact same first, middle,
and last names. It was a small class, too.
They had to write <name> #1 and <name> #2 on all their assignments.
[–] Drlittle 259 points 13 hours ago
Damn. Imagine being #2.

[–] zangor 121 points 13 hours ago
Pichael.
[–] CrazyTreePeople 875 points 23 hours ago*
When I was in middle school I friend requested around 30 people with the same name as
me. only like 4 accepted but around 6 or 7 years after that I was scrolling through Facebook
and saw my name was tagged in something. The picture was at a basketball tournament I
went to the previous weekend but when I looked at the picture while I was on the other
teams beach the person that was tagged was playing against us. The crazy part was we
both travelled 500+ miles from different sides of the country to play in the same
tournament on different teams in the same game and picture. And the only reason I saw
the picture was I friended other people with the same name as me when I was 11.
[–] TheRrandomm 63 points 15 hours ago
I once made a Messenger group consisting of me and all the people with the same name
I could find (7 only), no one ever answered :(
[–] sapfromtrees 1573 points 23 hours ago
In 2012 I was mugged at gunpoint while walking home late at night. Lost my wallet and
phone but fortunately was fine. Reported to police and never got my stuff back, no surprise.
4 years later I had moved 4500km away and got a phone call from my sister. She was at a
music festival and lost her ID. A guy camping next to her found it, noticed the address on
her drivers license. He recognized it because it was the same as the address of the fake ID
he had been using. He had my ID from my wallet that had been stolen 4 years earlier. My
sister handed him the phone and I was more amazed than anything, but I asked where he
had got it from, and it sounded like it had been passed around a few people at the school he
went to. I told him I didn't want it back, but asked him to promise to not give it to anyone
else, and not to steal my identity.
So far my identity hasn't been stolen.
[–] Eswarg 331 points 18 hours ago
Nice ??? I dunno.

Lost my ID at one point and went to a local gas station that I had never been to. A girl
that I had gone to school with worked there and we chat for a moment. She stops
suddenly and says, "I have your ID."
I looked at her like she was nuts and said, " doubt that, you sure it's mine?" She tells
me she's sure, turns around and grabs it off the counter. It was my ID.
I'd lost it a few months prior and her and I both had been out of school for over a year
at this point. I thanked her and asked her how she got it. She just says, "some lady
brought it in."
My story might be more impressive if yours wasn't so highly improbable.
[+] [deleted] 1 day ago (9 children)
[–] onegreatbroad 773 points 23 hours ago
Got two rare diseases in 1980. One of them had a 98% chance of death; of the 2% who
survived 97% ended up in long term care. I’m still on my own today, pretty much
functional.
You are the 0.06%

[–] REPTILEMARY 204 points 22 hours ago
If you don't mind explaining, what are the diseases?

[–] LeeTheGoat 767 points 20 hours ago
The 1980s
[–] theshoegazer 54 points 14 hours ago
Pac Man Fever?
[–] 19-dickety-2 51 points 13 hours ago
Boneitis
[–] candydaze 290 points 21 hours ago
I have two totally unrelated eye conditions, one of which affects about 0.04% of the
population and the other that is somewhere between 1 and 5%.
The one that affects the 0.04% triggers usually about 5 migraines per day.
But I am super, super fucking lucky that my migraines only present with visual symptoms,
not pain. Which is again fairly unusual.
My ophthalmologist and I are great friends
[–] PoliteAnarchist 76 points 18 hours ago
I'm buds with my ophthalmologist too! My optic nerve is pressing into the back of my
orb, and nobody knows why. According to my dr, I should be experiencing significant
visual field loss and extreme headaches, but I'm not. I've had all sorts of tests, and I'm
under observation, but we're slowly coming around to the conclusion that I just have
long eyes. 🤷♀
[–] GlitterHippy 367 points 19 hours ago
I'm super late, but one I can finally answer!

I was born on my dad's 23rd birthday at the exact same time he was born, 11:22pm.
[–] SoCool21 394 points 17 hours ago
How old where you when you were born? If you were 23 as well..... man that's crazy.
[–] fightinscot 508 points 22 hours ago
While on vacation in Florida one year, we stayed at a hotel that had a really awesome pool
and slide. I made friends with a kid there who was from New York. We spent 5 days at the
pool, in the arcade or just hanging out. We parted and assumed we would never see each
other again. 2 years later I walk into my first period class on the first day of 7th grade and
there is a kid who I didn't recognize. He looked really familiar and I thought he was just one
of the kids from 6th grade that hit a growth spurt. With 650 kids in a grade, it is tough to
know everyone. He sat near me and towards the end of class we got a chance to talk. He
said he had just moved there from New York after his dad got transferred. I stop him right
there and ask him if he ever stayed at a particular hotel and his eyes get big and he says
my name. We ended up graduating together and are still Facebook friends.
The least likely scenario to ever happen to anyone close to me happened to my mom. Her
and some of her friends, along with a few of their mom's all went to Hawaii in 1975. While
boarding a connecting flight in I think Colorado or St. Louis, she saw a woman who looked
like her cousin that ran away from home 2 years earlier. My great uncle was a Marine Corps
lietenant and then captain during Vietnam and was a no bullshit kind of guy. He was in the
Marines and so was his kids. Strict, regimented and so on. She didn't like it and on her 18th
birthday, split. My mom approached her and said her name. She turned around, hugged my
mom and asked how she was. They talked for about 20 seconds and my mom told her to
call her aunt (my grandma) and her cousin said she would. That was the first time since she
ran away and the last time ANYONE from the family saw or heard from her. My mom
happened to look over at a terminal gate and in a split second see a familiar face of a
woman that had all but become a ghost to the family and 700 miles from either one of their
homes. Her other siblings have tried to find her and in the 43 years since have only had a
few leads that might be her. They don't care to have a relationship, but just to let her know
her parents are both dead.
[–] Aliciasuxxx 202 points 16 hours ago
makes you wonder what shit went down because no one tries that hard to not be found
without some reason, but I guess in the seventies it’s a lot easier than in this age where
everyone has social media
[–] fightinscot 41 points 13 hours ago
He was super strict and his oldest son still says that is the reason. They had just
moved back to his little hometown after he got out of the Marines and the kids were
expected to do chores. Up at 5 am before school to do whatever jobs needed done
and then more jobs in the house and around the property after school and then
homework that was checked by my aunt. Yes sir/ ma'am, no sir / ma'am and they
were all expected to do just as they were told.
The previously mentioned son also joined the Marines at 18 and said after living with
his dad, the Marines were easy. The physical fitness part was the only challenge
because he had basically a Marine Corps style child hood and had lived on bases.
[–] SinusMonstrum 1139 points 22 hours ago
I found a shiny Pokémon before they gave me any Pokeballs.

[–] Tayters26 366 points 21 hours ago
F
[–] LeeTheGoat 187 points 20 hours ago
F
[–] Vonmyke98 154 points 22 hours ago
I had this too! It was a shiny Rattata in Firered version. It was actually the first
pokemon I encountered in that run through. All I could do was stare at it... Such a sad
day of my childhood life.
[–] WittyButterscotch 1061 points 1 day ago
I went to a trade show, and a lot of the companies had bowls with "Drop in your business
card to win..." At the end of the day they gathered us all together to draw the prizes... and I
won a laptop, an iPhone, a weekend in a resort, a years subscription to MSDN and a carton
of wine. After the first two wins people thought it was funny... then there was playful
teasing... but for the last couple I just got booed and people groaned a lot. A few people
called out "Rigged!" etc... but as the announcer explained it was multiple bowls from
multiple companies... all brimming with business cards. Totally freaked me out... felt like the
Twilight Zone.
[–] The_Lost_Google_User 341 points 1 day ago
So, just how many sets of business cards did you purchase?
[–] Drlittle 121 points 13 hours ago
Maybe he had a thicc, meaty business card that was light enough to rise to the top
when mixed somehow
[–] allthatjessz 257 points 18 hours ago
I saw a post from someone who worked on such shows who said, those are actually
rigged. They either look at the business cards to see for which company you work
and/or how high up you are in your company and then they act, as if they just randomly
pull a card out of the bowl, in hopes to get a good connection with that company for
future projects. So if you work for a big company and/or have a high position, it might
actually have been rigged.
[–] trevdordurden [ ] 103 points 15 hours ago
I'm going to make some new business cards now.

[–] Lars_lars_lars 145 points 15 hours ago
“President of the world”

[–] Gucci__Flip__Flops 64 points 15 hours ago
"God"
[–] Tuxieee 114 points 19 hours ago
Is your name Stanley Hudson?

[–] WizzlyG33 86 points 13 hours ago
I sat behind some guy in Physics that I have never once spoken to. One night he was in my
dream for some reason. The next morning he turns around and says “I don’t mean to sound
weird but you were in my dream last night”. This happened 11 years ago and I still can’t
believe it.
[–] cereal4646 710 points 1 day ago
Was visiting my grandma as a kid, we decided last minute we’d go eat first, then go to the
museum. As a result, I was the 1000th person to enter the museum. Got my picture in the
paper and a free T-shirt.
[–] HardCounter 450 points 18 hours ago
I'm only guessing, but I'm willing to bet you weren't the exact 1000th person, but the
one who was a child at around 1000. Pictures of a child at a museum in the paper are
nice and wholesome.
[–] BlueScreenOfDeath- 232 points 17 hours ago
soul crusher
[–] Old_man_at_heart 62 points 14 hours ago
The thousandth being a heavyset dude with a minecraft tshirt and a dorito dust
beard
"Next!"
[–] cereal4646 123 points 16 hours ago
Damnit don’t ruin my childhood

[–] JADW27 343 points 1 day ago
I was once dealt a royal flush pat.

Edit: Only five cards were dealt.
[–] PersistentBadger 328 points 19 hours ago
Friend had a dead router. I laid hands on it ("oh Lord, heal this router").
Router worked.
[–] Unthunkable 41 points 14 hours ago
My dad said when he was younger his friend was trying to drive them somewhere in his
old, cheap, broken car and it had died again. the friend was cursing his car and my dad
said "you just need to speak nicely to it" patted the dashboard and said "come on old
girl".. the car came back to life. The friend never cursed his car again.
Ive had similar things with technology too, I'm the unofficial IT person when the IT dept
is busy at work and I sometimes pat things and speak nicely and they work. Pretty sure
it's just giving them a moment to catch up though...
[–] angled_ 144 points 22 hours ago
Man, i've had two different birds shit on me on my way to school one morning.
[–] SantoWest 202 points 20 hours ago*
Years ago, when I was in 7th grade, a 3rd person shooter game named Gunz Online was
pretty popular (It's dead now I think).
I met someone, let's call him Carl, and we played together for a while. We got each others
MSN and we were chatting every once in a while. A bit after we stopped playing, we started
to talk less and less and finally it completely stopped. Fast forward 2 years, I'm in
highschool. You know in MSN you could put a status near your nickname. I wrote doing my
german homework... there. (I'm not from germany, but this school taught german, and
normally the most common secondary language is english)
Carl messaged me, after at least 2 years, and asked me how was I doing, just small talk
and stuff, and then asked about my homework and which school I was going. I told him,
and he said "me too!". It was already a shock, so I asked him which class, he was a year
senior of me. Then we talked a bit, and realized our homes were actually pretty close. And
he finally asked afterwards "Are you the guy who always sits near the bus door?". I said
yes. We were in the same bus for months, he was sitting 2 seats behind me. While playing
that game, I didn't even know that we were in the same city.
This was by far the most uncanny, improbable thing that happened to me.
[–] Ted_Ten_Thousand 67 points 17 hours ago
My band were recording in a studio in the Suffolk countryside. It was a pretty remote place.
Our singer had written a line in French (we’re all British) and after he went though his first
vocal take of the song, the engineer asked if we were sure it was correct. We looked at each
other suddenly unsure that we’d translated it correctly. At that exact moment there was a
knock on the door and it was the engineer’s French friend who he hasn’t seen for a couple
of years. He just popped by to say hello.
We joked that he just appears whenever someone is getting French wrong. Which as it turns
out, we were.
[–] jack0fclubs 589 points 20 hours ago*
Maybe ten years ago I was playing tennis with my brother on vacation at the hotel. We had
never played before and were bad, so we were just messing around.
My brother decided to swing as hard as he could at one of the balls and hit it straight up. It
must’ve been almost 200 feet in the air. (Edit: Thanks for the mathing help)
There was an 8 year old kid we knew lying down reading or something on the grass outside
of the fence, and the ball came straight down and hit him squarely in the testicles.
[–] TheCryForum 179 points 19 hours ago
Well, since everyone else is posting a "not me, but a friend of mine", I'll tell a crazy one
about my old stepdad. My old stepdad was a pretty chill guy. He started to get really sick
when I was in highschool though, and his lungs would hurt all the time, and as a smoker he
was concerned so he went and got some tests done. A few weeks pass, and he gets a really
sad call from his doctor... He had been diagnosed with lung cancer. We were all so sad, he
started looking into treatment options. His three daughters were still so young, they were
devasted.. well, the doctor called back a few days later, and told him to come in right away.
Him and my mom go in to see the doctor, and he goes over all of my stepdads test results
with him in person. False alarm, no lung cancer.. His lungs definitely weren't in the best
condition, but he was cancer free. It turns out there was a guy living in the same city as us,
with the same FIRST and LAST name as my stepdad.. the doctor accidently got the names
mixed up and called the wrong guys with their results.. the only reason the doctor even
noticed was because some paperwork had come through with their middle names on it, and
their middle names were different. We felt so bad for the other guy, because he was given a
clean bill of health, only to find out he was read someone else's results and he actually was
the one who had lung cancer.. it was sad all around really.
[–] Alt_North 111 points 19 hours ago*
Walked into a casino and registered for their "Players Club" for $10 so they'd waive my $10
entry fee for anyone not in the Players Club, which is what everyone does. After an hour or
so they called my name over the PA system and summoned me to an area where they were
doing a promotion. They handed me five big oversized dice and told me if I rolled a
"Yahtzee" I'd win $500. Took all my friends out to dinner that night.
[–] DungeonHills 112 points 19 hours ago
Walking home one night, alone, I saw a large meteorite scorching across the sky leaving a
fairly fiery trail and ending in a greenish light. Probably the most amazing thing I had seen.
Then, years later out in the Scottish hills, I was on my own again, and suddenly the sky lit
up and when I looked up there was this massive trail being scored across the sky. As it went
towards the opposite horizon it went behind clouds and lit them up, all the while the ground
around me looked like someone had set off a massive flare.
It is hard to explain to people just how bright it was without sounding like I am
exaggerating.
[–] Nooms88 58 points 19 hours ago
I grew up in North London and my primary school had 18 people in each year. Went to
Uganda when I was 19, we decided to check out a local bar in Jinja, out of the way to play
some pool and have a beer, bumped into a guy I went to primary school with.
[–] SilverCommon 106 points 22 hours ago
At an arcade in 8th grade, I managed to win the crane prize, which was a cup with 5000
tickets. Tell my friends, they ask me to show them how I did it, so I play again to
demonstrate...and picked up another 5000 tickets. On the same day, I also won the jackpot
on the game where the light goes through all the bulbs and you have to stop it on a certain
one...twice. I went home with two wicked lava lamps and a shit load of candy.
[–] itsRuppy 53 points 14 hours ago
I knew someone who was at the Bataclan massacre in Paris, France. For those who don't
know on the 13th of november 2015 a concert was taking place and a few gunmen entered
and killed loads of people.
She became totaly agoraphobic and would not leave her house. One day her friends tried to
convince her to go on a trip with them to London, they succeded but at the last moment she
cancelled, she got too scared.
So her friends went to London and were present at the London bridge attack on the 3rd of
June 2017... Of course it simply solidified her agoraphobia and now she basically never
leaves her place.
[–] WatermelonDestroyer 138 points 1 day ago
I had a bright orange bike, pretty old and rusty, that got stollen. Month later, well after I
moved out, I looked at the window and saw it outside. I went to check if it was mine as I
couldn't truly believe it, and sure enough the locker's code was my birthdate!
I moved out again (twice) and I'm still waiting for my bike to appear in front of my house by
magic.
[–] Old_man_at_heart 121 points 14 hours ago
10-15 years ago or so my uncle had a bike stolen from him. He had put a band-aid on
the frame before he lost it. A handful of years later he was standing at an intersection
and bumped into a guy with the same bike. My uncle spotted the band-aid and started
to talk to the guy
Uncle: nice bike
Guy: thanks
Uncle: you know, I had one just like this...
The guy dropped it and ran.
[–] UrBoyPoop 179 points 22 hours ago
Bout two years ago when fantasy football was super obnoxious and everywhere I was deep
into it with some friends. Little over halfway through the season I wasn’t really winning
anything so I stopped meeting up with my friends and strategizing with them. But I kinda
kept playing. Then one week I forgot to do any lineups it was like 4 in the morning I was so
tired but something made me do a couple quarter lineups just a couple. Woke up to take my
girlfriend to work and was in second place I won 1,500 off a quarter...
[–] sibears99 51 points 17 hours ago
About 3-4 years ago my buddy played DFS for the first time. He was trying to enter the
millionaire maker on DraftKings he entered the wrong tournament. His team scored the
most points any team scored all season. He won 10k but should have been a millionaire.
[–] Halt_the_Ranger27 210 points 1 day ago*
Was playing golf with a few buddies. We were standing on the green a good 40 yards from
our carts, and I told one of them that I would throw my golf ball into his bag. I didn't think
I'd actually do it, but sure enough I threw it and it sailed right into one of the small holes on
the top, no bounce or anything.
[–] Arkansas_Red 86 points 23 hours ago
I dig your username. I still own all the Ranger's Apprentice books from when I was a
kid!
[–] ThaTree 131 points 20 hours ago
Lightning struck in between me and my ex one day on a hike. We were only like 3 feet
apart.
[–] LastLadyResting 36 points 19 hours ago
Were you knocked back or deafened?

[–] ryancleg 27 points 16 hours ago
I had a close call like this (more like 5ft away) and it was more blinding than
deafening. It was like a 4ft wide ball of light appeared above a car then WHAM a big
line of light touched the sky. It was loud as hell but the light was more memorable
because it was so bright.
[–] a-r-c 49 points 16 hours ago
My (biological) dad got a vasectomy about 3 years before I was born.

Failure rate on those is <1% so I'd say that my being born was pretty improbable.
[–] assaf00 92 points 20 hours ago
Had a girl in my 4th grade class in Detroit Michigan, 8 years later she’s in my freshman
university class half away across the world in Beirut Lebanon.
[–] Laurenisalady 44 points 19 hours ago
I met a stranger, in Tokyo, who had spent time in detention in high school. The woman who
ran that detention? My mom. I met a stranger in Tokyo, who knew my mom from a small
town in Idaho.
[–] Floor-is 40 points 13 hours ago
My then girlfriend and me went on holiday, camping in the south of France. Our next door
neighbor (house to the right of us) was already camping somewhere in France for a couple
days. We drove all day to the coast, tried find a campground in the dark. Found it, put up
our tent and climbed in for a good rest. Next morning we woke up to the sound of our
neighbor from home calling us for coffee.. Her tent was directly next to us, on the right
side.
We drove 1000 kilometers (550-ish miles) to end up next to our neighbor.
[–] prsdrag0n 355 points 1 day ago*
After I graduated from high school in California, my parents took me on a three week trip
across Germany, France and Switzerland as a graduation present instead of going on the
trip organized by my high school. On the last day, we stopped in the town of Heidelberg
before heading to the airport in Frankfurt to explore the town. It was there where I ran into
my high school’s Europe trip. I was able to reconnect with many acquaintances whom I
thought I would never run into again. It was at that moment I realized just how small the
world really was.
Edit: To shed some light on this, my high school had an optional post-graduation Europe trip
which was ridiculously expensive. At the time my father’s company had him in Europe quite
a bit for work. He managed to use this to his advantage to turn it into a work/personal trip
and invited me and my mother to tag along. It ended up being a fantastic trip and
considerably less expensive in the long run.
[–] PHOENIX_THE_JEAN 342 points 1 day ago*
I, a NORTH AFRICAN PERSON of EGYPTIAN descent, was born with a trait that affects 0.3%
- 0.6% of Southeast Asians.
There was a 99.3% chance that I wouldn't be born with it... from another part of the
world... really Chromosomes??? REALLY YOU GUYS?
[–] WR810 75 points 1 day ago
What is your unique trait?

[–] PHOENIX_THE_JEAN 127 points 1 day ago
Nevous of Ota, in its rarest form (on one side only and not bilaterally). Most nevi of
otus are bilateral and happen on both sides of the face but I guess I escaped it :(.
I also didn't know this until my ex pointed it out but I have something called
"Mongolian spot" on my back.
[–] Ceddezilwa 78 points 23 hours ago
Link for those who do not want to search:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nevus_of_Ota
"It is found only on the face, most commonly unilaterally, rarely bilaterally.."
[–] gigboegwu 171 points 22 hours ago
I’ve been stung by bees only twice in my entire life. Both times on my birthday...but both
incidents were about 20 years apart from each other.
[–] lukeman3000 271 points 19 hours ago
Hapbee birthday
[–] buggsylove 222 points 1 day ago
Once as a server I grabbed a handful of forks a handful of knives and a handful of napkins
to roll together. I randomly grabbed the same number of each item.
[–] berniemax 191 points 22 hours ago
Was it one of each?

[–] buggsylove 49 points 21 hours ago
Lol, it was several of each.

[–] WinterPicture 39 points 14 hours ago
There was a guy in my class in University who had the exact same name as me, my
surname isn't so common in this country. But he looked the total opposite of me: red hair,
pale skin, light eyes, taller. I have brown hair, olive skin, hazel eyes and just average height.
We both thought it was cool that we had the same name because we'd never met another
person with it and got talking.
Then we discovered we had the exact same birthday. DAY-MONTH-YEAR.
Was really trippy and we both thought we were messing with each other until ID's were
produced.
[–] PhreedomPhighter 212 points 1 day ago
A chef's knife fell off a counter, landed blade-side down on my arm, and left a scar that'll be
on my body forever. As if I needed a physical reminder that my luck is terrible.
[–] BaltSuz 152 points 1 day ago*
I dropped a Henkel chef’s knife and it went right through my foot-I was literally stuck to
the kitchen floor-Those balanced knives are dangerous
A cheap knife will land sideways and bounce-a good knife will land blade first-
[–] Kelpurnicus 62 points 23 hours ago
Once, (we worked at a camp outdoors) I had a co-worker start juggling a large knife he
had, I was maybe 20 feet away on a picnic table, and he lost control of it, it bounced off
the ground, and cut both of my legs in two symmetrical diagonal lines. Not that exciting,
but fun to tell everyone why I was bleeding
[–] weeza29745 116 points 1 day ago
Got hit directly in the butt with a football a few days in a row. I don’t play football and just
happened to be around some people messing around with one in a parking lot each time.
My butt’s not THAT big. It was strange.
[–] captaincalamity_ 39 points 19 hours ago
How big is your butt though

[–] generalg28 31 points 13 hours ago
Been waiting for an opportunity to tell this story.

I used to work as a shuttle driver for a dealership. I was supposed to pick up a guy named
George and have been given his phone number. Before picking him up I gave George a call
to give him a heads up. The conversation went as follows. (slightly abbreviated)
General: hello George? George: yes hello! General: this is General from Dealership to pick
you up, you ready? George: you're almost here? I'm ready for you. General: alright I'll be
there shortly. George: is this General? General: yes, this is General from Dealership. Your
vehicle is ready. George: My what now? General: you're vehicle. George: My car is here,
this is General? General: I am General from Dealership, are you having a vehicle serviced at
Dealership? George: no, there must be a mistake. General: I'm sorry, your name is George
and you are waiting for someone to pick you up? Someone named General? George: Yessir,
but a friend of mine, and were not going to a dealership. I think you must have the wrong
number. General: Well.... I hope you find your General. George: Shit! I hope you find your
George!
Tldr: was given the wrong number for a customer I was to pick up and called a rando who
shared his name, waiting to be picked up by his friend who shared my name.
[–] usually_just_lurking 78 points 1 day ago
While walking down a street next to a large building, someone 3 stories up pushed a large
chair against a huge window, shattering it. The glass shards rained down directly on me and
I didn’t get a scratch. People nearby ran up to help me; we were all amazed that I somehow
didn’t get a single cut.
[–] tizom73 27 points 13 hours ago
Forgot my wallet one day. Was a driver so no coworkers to buy me any food. Hypoglycemic
and miserable by 3 pm and atopped to use restroom at po dunk gas station. On my way out
i saw an already used scratch off lotto ticket on the ground. I dont know why i picked it up
but i did. It was a $7 winner.
[–] ImperialSympathizer 25 points 13 hours ago
I was at a house party and wanted to go get cigarettes, so one of my buddies gave me his
keys (I was late and not drunk yet) to run to the store. I had been out of town in college for
a while so I couldn't really remember which car was my friend's, but I had a pretty good
idea.
I saw an older nissan that looked right. I wasn't totally sure it was my friend's, but when the
keys opened it up and started the ignition I felt pretty sure. When I got back with the
cigarettes, the party was in chaos. One dude was freaking out that his car had been stolen
and they were 30 seconds from calling the police. After a LOT of rapid fire drunken
discussion where everyone progressively got more confused, it became clear that my
friend's keys had unlocked and started the wrong car. The keys were actually for a Toyota
that was about 10 years newer than the Nissan I took to the store. I don't know enough
about locks, keys, or cars to understand how truly improbable this might have been, but
yeah.
[–] OyeYouDer 42 points 14 hours ago
I've posted this before...but here goes again. I killed John Denver. Drinking one night with
my friends, stationed in Germany, one of those Time Life Best-Of compilation CDs starts
scrolling across the TV screen. Me, a (then) 19-year old GI in a foreign country, quite full of
assholios and tequila, I mutter something like, "John Denver! Isn't that guy dead??". My 30-
something friend Matt has a good laugh at my expense, joined in by the others in the room.
Tells me he's most certainly alive and well. I, not wanting to lose the spotlight, say, "What?
Really? That fucker needs to DIE!", or some shit to that effect. Shocked laughter. Fade to
black. Next day. Awaked by pounding on my barracks door. "You got a call down in the
orderly room!". Highly unusual, but I groggily throw my pants on and head downstairs. It's
Matt. And he's panting. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU FUCKING DID LAST NIGHT???". "Hu-
What? Who is this?". "It's Matt, you asshole! You fucking killed John Denver!". I, of course,
start laughing, thinking he's completely screwing with me. But in his next sentence, I truly
hear his tone. It's easily identifiable as his "no-bullshit" tone. "No, asshole, I'm not kidding!
You killed John Denver! His fucking plane crashed last night!!". I've never again attempted
to exercise my superpowers...
[–] patchmo 19 points 13 hours ago
Had a procedure to remove something. 2% chance of it returning, it returned. Had the

procedure again, it returned again, had the procedure a third time with a new doctor,
returned. They exchange notes and end up performing a gnarly surgery on me, said that
there’s no possible way of it returning. One year later I’m back on the operating table. I’m
dreading it’s return.
Doc calls me an unfortunate miracle.
[–] ColtonBackSunday 21 points 13 hours ago
I was once about 5 or 6 years old. I was visiting the town my dad was from about 40 miles
north of where I was living at the time.
I wanted to write a letter to my grandmother who had passed away about a year prior. By
my own child logic I thought if I threw the piece of paper outside, it would be taken by the
wind and end up finding its way to her in heaven.
Fast forward close to maybe a month or two later. The piece of paper with my stick figure
drawing was in my yard, 40 miles away from where I released it, caught in a bush.
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When at college we had old style (plug in) phones

had been pressing 2 instead of 5 when dialling the

Old style plug in phones.... 4 result in a ban without a prior warning.

Seriously, I used to have one that you stuck

[–] hoyohoyo9 22 points 7 hours ago

Mods reserve the right to remove content

Use a [Serious] post tag to designate

I was telling my coworkers about an interesting

remind them not to judge customers on

walked in to buy another identical one as backup.

i’m like 90% sure that it’s a wizard who’s

A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He Find a subreddit Learn something

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[–] Xpert_on 137 points 16 hours ago

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Was it my brother? He works for a company < > discussions in r/AskReddit X

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[–] stegblobirl 300 points 21 hours ago

[–] quats5 87 points 20 hours ago

Eep. I’m not looking.

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[–] wmorris33026 4211 points 20 hours ago

[–] fearlessAppetite 2146 points 18 hours ago

that is one loyal wallet :D

[–] WeightsWithSquee 1428 points 16 hours ago

[–] david_bazooka 243 points 16 hours ago

[–] exactlythatpedantic 278 points 15 hours ago

Item #: SCP-w5l3t Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures:

[–] repodepohippo 99 points 13 hours ago

[–] EverChillingLucifer 54 points 13 hours ago

Subject used to contain a container that contains all containers.

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[–] Lars_lars_lars 90 points 15 hours ago

Hurry up and lose it again so we can see what happens next!

[–] wmorris33026 44 points 15 hours ago

[–] Thiago270398 49 points 13 hours ago

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[–] ObamasRetirementPlan 3150 points 22 hours ago

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[–] AwakenMirror 126 points 14 hours ago

[–] theprisefighter 45 points 13 hours ago

A wild Legacy of Kain reference?! What a good morning!

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[–] Hawkmek 90 points 14 hours ago

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[–] Cotillionb 1350 points 14 hours ago

It's a shame coming to these threads late... I have a good one!