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Published: 23 December 2018

Professionalism of mediators in our society

M S Siddiqui

The political parties are in logger heads over the different political and constitutional issues. There
were many efforts of negotiated settlement of the conflict by Ambassadors of some western
countries and also some UN sponsored meditations. Sir Ninihan Stphen, Ex-Governor General of
Australia and Mr Oscar Fernandez-Taranco, the Assistant Secretary General of UN also came to
Bangladesh for a negotiated settlement of political dispute in Bangladesh.

The mediation in our society for many social, business and family conflicts are known as
compromise (aposh mimangsha) organize by social leaders, particularly in rural Bangladesh. The
economic development and change is pattern of society is under challenge in mediation. There is a
change in leadership through replace of leader to member of local government as per local
government laws. The local political leaders and wealthy persons are taking helm of the mediation.

Such mediation is voluntary in nature but now-a-days corrupt practices make the process
controversial. A new category of mediation has been initiated by different human right organizations /
NGOs. Bangladesh National Women Lawyers' Association (BNWLA) and Bangladesh National
Women Lawyers' Association (BNWLA) are such examples in Bangladesh. They train their staffs to
support the women in mediated conflict resolution.

Conflict, or more specifically, interpersonal conflict, is a fact of life, and particularly of organizational
life. One of the most common difficulties is conflict-with friends and co-workers, with children or
parents, with a spouse, with people who hold opinions different from each other.

However, conflict can also arise in relationships and situations outside work. Interpersonal conflict
has been defined as: "An expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who
perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from the other party in achieving
their goals".

The most widely accepted definition of conflict is refers to conflict as ' pursuit of incompatible goals
by individuals or groups'. In other words conflict situations arise when individuals or groups pursue
positions, interests, needs, or values that may lead to actions that come up against the interests,
needs and values of others when they also want to satisfy their goals.

Third party mediation is one of the alternate to resolve the conflict. Mediation of Conflict brings two
conflicting parties to the table, along with a professional mediator. Effective regulation of conflict
requires a skill to resolve the conflict. The mediators having empathy and understanding, can start to
take on a more compassionate approach to conflict and get less involved with the emotions that
surround it, working through the essential questions instead.
The job of mediation requires knowledge, skill and dedication to resolve the dispute. Mediation is
founded upon a dynamic set of professional skills. It can be learn, develop and maintain the habits of
practice to be a successful mediator or conflict resolvers.

The mediator of conflict resolution often are unable to appropriately use their knowledge and skills
because of certain deficiencies in awareness, such as an excessively self-centered perspectives;
strong negative emotions; automatic, habitual ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving; insensitivity to
emotions; insufficient social skills; and inadequate focus or concentration.

Mindfulness can help people overcome such deficiencies in awareness. However, mindfulness is
difficult to establish and maintain, in the face of those very obstacles, especially in proximity to
heated conflict.

Mediators "…seek to enhance their ability to be dispute resolvers by moving beyond knowledge and
skills to deeper levels of engagement in their work" (Bowling and Hoffman, 2003). The primary step
to be a mediator is to give due mindful attention to the problem. Mindfulness can be considered as a
valuable contributor to this process (Roeser et al., 2012).

The application of mindfulness processes to reconciliation and conflict management, identify and
handle strong emotions, develop effective communication tools that help navigate conflict and
integrate mindfulness into your interpersonal relationships etc. Mindfulness is a conscious
awareness of the present moment. Being mindful is to live in the present moment with regard to our
sensations, feelings, thoughts and actions. It brings about self-responsibility.

Mindfulness derives from intricately interconnected with ancient Buddhist philosophy, psychology,
ethics, and related meditative practices. The word "mindfulness" carries many meanings. In common
parlance, to be mindful means to be "conscious or aware of something". Mindfulness practice can
help a person achieve these insights, that is, to see things as they actually are.

Mindfulness, a systematic method of paying attention, deliberately, in the moment, without judgment,
can help us gain awareness of our mental and emotional processes, our habitual reactions, and their
manifestations in our mind, body, and breath. Such self-awareness opens the door to developing
ourselves in ways that will enable us to be more skilful and to get greater satisfaction from our work
and our lives.

The principal method for cultivating mindfulness is practicing silent mindfulness meditation process
such as meditation etc and then deliberately bringing mindfulness into daily life.

The basics of mindfulness meditation, a systematic method of moment-to-moment non-judgmental

awareness, which develops both calmness of mind and body and deep insight into the workings of
our minds and hearts, it deepen self-awareness and be kinder to practitioners and others.

Mindfulness decreases the prominence of self-centered focus and foster the strength of other
centered focus. It reduces power of strong negative emotions. It promotes freedom from automatic,
habitual way of thinking, feeling and behaving. It fosters sensitivity to emotions of self and other. It
improves social skills and strengthens the both forms of attention and non-judgmental awareness.

Mindfulness one can foster understanding of and compassion for others. It can help to understand
compassion for others. It recognises interconnectedness, support to enter inside to know about how
our minds work. It enhances the ability to notice and let go of self-cantered, perceptions and
intentions about self and other. Mindfulness is a certain way of paying attention - can help overcome
these obstacles and improve decision-making in negotiations and other conflict-related situations.
But mindfulness is difficult to establish and maintain, especially in proximity to conflict. Mediators
adapt various means to encourage mindfulness in the conflicting parties. These are- reframing,
summarizing, transforming of narrative, rhetorical questions are all intended to encourage reflection,
offer a different perspective and foster insight and self-awareness.

The practice of mindful conflict management allow to pay attention to the present moment in conflict,
recognising own conflict pattern, behaviour and conflict response with an attitude of openness and
non-judgment. It helps mediator for automatic response with an attitude of curiosity towards his / her
perceptions and then working more skillfully with discomfort, frustration, anger, and worry, emotions
that automatically occur when mediator doesn't feels comfortable in conflict.

Mediation is a viable way to solve disputes by allowing the parties to make the decisions about their
issues rather than the court making the decisions. An unresolved conflict or interpersonal
disagreement festers just under the surface in your work environment. It bubbles to the surface
whenever enabled, and always at the worst possible moment.

Mediating of a conflict is challenging. Resolving conflict can be viewed as a form of collaborative,

creative problem solving. The objective is a good quality solution with disputants' commitment to
implementing the solution. It creates disputants' perceptions that the solution and the process are
fair.

It uses disputants' sense of empowerment to resolve the current and future conflicts with efficient
use of time. Mindfulness of mediator in resolving the dispute displayed in mental, behavioural, and
physical exercise is a powerful tool that can help us respond to conflict in a co- operative and non-
reactive manner with win-win situation.

The activities of NGOs and human right organizations are not sufficient to cover whole society in
Bangladesh and there should be professional mediators with due training to mediate conflict of
society and business etc. Bangladesh may initiate some course on mediation at some educational
institutes.

World Mediation Organization (WMO), a German based organization also offers some online
courses. We must safeguard our 'aposh mimangsha' process in order to keep harmony in the society
and uphold tradition of compromise and respect for the elders.

The writer is a legal economist. Email: mssiddiqui2035@gmail.com