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Taylor Burkett

Dr. Amaya-Anderson

ENGL 101

11 December 2017

Shaping Connie’s Character

Joyce Carol Oates’s “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” delves into the

uncertainty of being an adolescent. This piece of literature follows Connie’s uncertainty and her

struggle from child to mature adult. She is forced to realize that this adult persona she has

established is nothing more than a fantasy and that this new adult life she has created for herself

includes internally facing more than she is able to handle. Well crafted by Oates, Connie’s

struggle represents a commonality in various lives of adolescents, specifically teenage girls, and

all of the trials and tribulations that follow with it. After thoroughly reading and analyzing the

text, classified critics widely accepted that Oates’s “Where Are You Going, Where Have You

Been?” portrays to the reader that from the time that Connie goes outside to dry her hair, the

remainder of the story is nothing but a dream. Although there are numerous viewpoints and

opinions on Connie’s complications, many critics agree upon the reasons that led up to Connie’s

struggle in life that began as a child, continue through her teenage years, and that will remain

predominant to follow her throughout her future.

Since Connie was a child, she always thought of herself as superior to everyone else

around her, which led to the struggles she began to face throughout her life, as agreed by critics.

Marie Mitchell Olesen Urbanski writes, “Members of Connie’s family recognize their

powerlessness and thus their difference from her. Her mother and sister are not attractive, so they

do not really count; and her father, who spends most of his time at work, is weak. [ . . . ]
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Refusing to attend a family picnic, Connie is rejecting not only her family’s company, but the

settled order of their existence”. Connie describes both her mother and her sister as being

extremely less attractive than herself. When Connie talks about either her mother or her sister,

establishing that she is higher than they makes her feel superior to those around her. Her family

is able to identify that there are no means to get to Connie; therefore, her family recognizes and

accepts their powerlessness towards Connie. Also, removing herself from a family function to

Connie shows that she is better than the rest of her family and she does not want to be recognized

or associated as a part of them. Joyce Carol Oates describes Connie in such a way that, “She

knew she was pretty and that was everything”(465). Knowing that Connie could easily surpass

everyone was all she ever wanted. Her sister, June, was the golden child to her aunts and uncles,

parents, grandparents, etc., but all that mattered to Connie was her physical appearance. Even

though she looked like her mother, Connie could only acknowledge her mother’s flaws and how

much better she looked than her mother. Stan Kozikowski says that Connie is, “A girl [that]

justly desires in the purity of her heart to be pretty, to feel good, to gain attention, and to be

cherished—a dream in formation since early childhood”. Connie did not get the attention that she

desired from any of her family members; she only was pushed to the side because her sister was

the center of attention. Being ignored made Connie strive for and look vigorously for attention

from someone, whomever it may be. Connie’s dream stemmed from the idea of being prettier

than the rest and wanting all the attention; she had no idea what exactly to want, therefore she

wanted everything. Connie strived to be wanted because that was lacking in her family. Connie

was the forgotten about child; her parents were not concerned for the most part of where she was

or what she was doing, they rarely asked any questions. Connie thinking of herself at an entire

level separate, above of course, from the rest was one of many ideals that led to Connie’s
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struggles throughout her lifetime. Connie not only failed to hold a strong family relationship as a

young child, but that failure grew as she grew older.

Connie’s teenage years were rough years for her because the lack of a strong family bond

resulted in further years of struggle for her. Gretchen Schulz and R.J.R. Rockwood agree that,

“Connie represents an entire generation of young people who have grown up-or tried to-without

the help of those bed-time stories [ . . . ] The only “stories” Connie knows are those of the

sexually provocative but superficial lyrics of the popular songs she loves”. The lack and distance

of a mother and father figure in Connie’s life contributed to the downfall of her childhood and

beginning of her struggles. Connie was almost independent by the time she was child; therefore,

she had to figure out life on her own and find a way through life. Without the bedtime stories,

Connie’s only hope in learning morals and the way of life came from fantasized lyrics in some

silly rap song. If Connie was exposed to books, her outlook may have drastically changed, but

the lack of a loveable childhood twisted her outlook of life. “Everything about her had two sides

to it, one for home and one for anywhere that was not home”(Oates 466). Connie felt that she

could not be who she was at home because she did not receive the attention she desired. For that

reason to get what she wanted, Connie became an entirely different person when she stepped foot

outside her house. Something as simple as a shirt could represent two different things: one when

worn inside the house and something completely different when worn anywhere outside the

house. “They went up through the maze of parked and cruising cars to the bright-it, fly-infested

restaurant, their faces pleased and expectant as if they were entering a sacred building that

loomed out of the night to give them what haven and what blessing they yearned for. [ . . . ]

[They] listened to the music that made everything so good: the music was always in the

background like music at a church service, it was something to depend upon”(Oates 466). The
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restaurant, a place described as dirty and run-down, was a place that Connie and her friends

loved to go. No matter where they went, as long as it was not home, they were happy. The

restaurant was also a common hangout spot for the older kids in the area, which urged Connie to

want to go even more. Being a teenager, Connie was naturally wanting to rebel, but even more so

considering her situation at home and the negative effects the household situation had on her life

and decision making process. Connie’s family did not hold strong family relations with one

another and that heavily impacted Connie’s teenage years.

Through the years of growing up, Connie formed these specific ideals and morals that she

will forever life by in the future. These ideals and morals will come into play with Connie’s

uncertainty and struggles in her lifetime. Martha E. Widmayer says, “Connie, for whom her

teenage hangout is a kind of “sacred building” and its music “like music at a church service,” is

too absorbed with the vanities of this world to concern herself with the possibility of one to

come”. In her future, Connie is too focused on having a perfect future that even the thought of it

actually occurring cannot be imagined because her mind is fulfilled with the idea to strive for

perfection. Connie is one of those people who take actions not for themselves, but rather for the

thought of people around her. Connie is more concerned with her impression that she leaves on

others. Rena Korb mentions, “Arnold makes himself acceptable to Connie through that which

she values, superficial appearance, and then uses his own depraved power to keep her with him”.

Connie was at first intrigued by Arnold, but did not want to come off in a flirtatious manner at

first. But, through her desiring “need” to be loved by someone, she thought maybe Arnold could

take on that spot. When Arnold begins his conversation with Connie, he grabs her attention by

complementing her on all of the aspects she believed to be beyond perfect, such as her hair,

body, and face. This caught Connie’s attention because she wanted to be recognized by those
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things. After he secures himself and knows that Connie is interested, from there it becomes a

waiting game. This becomes uneasy due to Connie’s childhood and of her not knowing what to

do. She calls Arnold out on being an older man, yet continues to go forth despite that issue. This

goes to show that the lack of parent figures in Connie’s life heavily influenced how her decisions

were made. Nancy Bishop Dessommes comments saying, “Though Connie’s self-absorption can

be excused as normal, her lack of religious training nonetheless creates a serious deficiency in

her ability to be aware of the potential for evil in the world”. As seen throughout the story,

Connie strives for perfection, which creates the problem of her not having an open eye to what

can go wrong. Because she strives for perfect, all she sees is perfect. Connie’s uncertainty that

built up throughout her childhood will continue to be present throughout her future. The morals

and ideals that she formed, she will continue to live by because that is all she ever knows. She

was never taught anything different. Connie’s life was altered from a very young age. Ever since,

her struggles in life have only gotten stronger as she has aged. There were many contributing

factors such as lack of family relationships and the need to feel better than anyone else in the

room.

Although there are numerous viewpoints and opinions on Connie’s complications, many

critics agree upon the reasons that led up to Connie’s struggle in life that began as a child,

continue through her teenage years, and that will remain predominant to follow her throughout

her future. Connie’s struggle becomes important in better understanding the story because it

helps the reader to better understand Connie as a character. Having this knowledge on this

specific character allows the reader to fully understand why Connie is how she is and why she

makes the decisions and takes the actions that she does. A story can be interpreted one of many

ways, but overall there is an underlying commonality that the reader takes away from it, whether
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or not it be exactly what the author had intended. Joyce Carol Oates’s “Where Are You Going,

Where Have You Been?” is a story that focuses on the main character, Connie, and describes

her life throughout the years. Oates delves into the uncertainty of being an adolescent and the

troubles that come with it.